1 00:00:02,720 --> 00:00:05,880 Speaker 1: Hi. This is Laura Vandercamp. I'm a mother of five, 2 00:00:06,160 --> 00:00:10,240 Speaker 1: an author, journalist, and speaker. And this is Sarah Hartunger. 3 00:00:10,480 --> 00:00:13,480 Speaker 1: I'm a mother of three, a practicing physician and blogger. 4 00:00:13,480 --> 00:00:15,840 Speaker 1: On the side, we are two working parents who love 5 00:00:15,840 --> 00:00:19,320 Speaker 1: our careers and our families. Welcome to best of both worlds. 6 00:00:19,600 --> 00:00:22,400 Speaker 1: Here we talk about how real women manage work, family, 7 00:00:22,560 --> 00:00:25,800 Speaker 1: and time for fun, from figuring out childcare to mapping 8 00:00:25,800 --> 00:00:28,360 Speaker 1: out long term career goals. We want you to get 9 00:00:28,400 --> 00:00:34,159 Speaker 1: the most out of life. Welcome to best of both worlds. 10 00:00:34,320 --> 00:00:37,120 Speaker 1: This is Laura. This is episode one hundred and ninety two, 11 00:00:37,120 --> 00:00:39,720 Speaker 1: which is airing in early April of twenty twenty one. 12 00:00:40,080 --> 00:00:43,599 Speaker 1: Sarah will be interviewing Megan Hyatt Miller about her new 13 00:00:43,600 --> 00:00:48,000 Speaker 1: book that's coming out about all things productivity and generally 14 00:00:48,000 --> 00:00:52,480 Speaker 1: making our lives work. Speaking of lives working, we're celebrating 15 00:00:52,600 --> 00:00:57,800 Speaker 1: Sarah's ninth anniversary of motherhood this week, right, Yes, although 16 00:00:57,840 --> 00:01:00,440 Speaker 1: does motherhood star when you're pregnant or I guess that's 17 00:01:00,480 --> 00:01:09,000 Speaker 1: just as the other head, Yes, exactly, so happy birthday. Yes, 18 00:01:09,360 --> 00:01:12,560 Speaker 1: I mean I feel like I feel like nine is interesting. 19 00:01:12,600 --> 00:01:15,800 Speaker 1: Like I was just reflecting on you know, when of 20 00:01:15,800 --> 00:01:18,080 Speaker 1: your kids become tweens, And I'm not sure nine is 21 00:01:18,080 --> 00:01:20,160 Speaker 1: the answer. But then I was also thinking from my 22 00:01:20,400 --> 00:01:27,080 Speaker 1: pediatric endocrinologist perspective that perhaps girls should be called tweens 23 00:01:27,120 --> 00:01:31,040 Speaker 1: before boys do, because typically they do go through puberty 24 00:01:31,360 --> 00:01:33,920 Speaker 1: earlier than boys. And we are not going to discuss 25 00:01:33,920 --> 00:01:36,120 Speaker 1: our own children's puberty on this podcast because that would 26 00:01:36,160 --> 00:01:38,760 Speaker 1: be mortifying for any parties involved. But I am a 27 00:01:38,760 --> 00:01:42,080 Speaker 1: pediatric endochronologist, so I watch lots of hundreds of kids 28 00:01:42,160 --> 00:01:45,160 Speaker 1: go through puberty, and I also thought this would be 29 00:01:45,160 --> 00:01:46,959 Speaker 1: a fun time for me to actually put in a 30 00:01:47,040 --> 00:01:49,920 Speaker 1: tiny bit of my medical hat on and and tell 31 00:01:49,960 --> 00:01:54,000 Speaker 1: people when puberty happens, because I'm always surprised that parents 32 00:01:54,040 --> 00:01:56,680 Speaker 1: don't know, or that they're surprised when it happens to 33 00:01:56,720 --> 00:01:59,680 Speaker 1: their kids, well because the parents presumably went through it 34 00:02:00,080 --> 00:02:06,240 Speaker 1: some point, sober women the other gender child or I 35 00:02:06,240 --> 00:02:09,600 Speaker 1: think there's that. Yeah, men never remember when they went 36 00:02:09,600 --> 00:02:13,040 Speaker 1: through puberty. People always remember the last part of puberty, 37 00:02:13,160 --> 00:02:15,760 Speaker 1: so like women remember having their period and men remember 38 00:02:15,760 --> 00:02:18,000 Speaker 1: like growing a beard and having a voice change. But 39 00:02:18,120 --> 00:02:19,959 Speaker 1: what we forget is that puberty is like a several 40 00:02:20,040 --> 00:02:22,840 Speaker 1: years long kind of process. It doesn't just go like 41 00:02:23,400 --> 00:02:26,400 Speaker 1: from a tiny breast bud to like cycling in like 42 00:02:26,520 --> 00:02:28,400 Speaker 1: three weeks or something like that. And sometimes I think 43 00:02:28,440 --> 00:02:30,000 Speaker 1: parents have that idea in their head as well, which 44 00:02:30,000 --> 00:02:32,600 Speaker 1: is why we'll get like absolute panic because they, you know, 45 00:02:33,280 --> 00:02:35,480 Speaker 1: stat appointment, my ten year old has a breastbud. It's 46 00:02:35,480 --> 00:02:39,680 Speaker 1: like that is the definition of normal. There's nothing going 47 00:02:39,760 --> 00:02:42,320 Speaker 1: on here. I've even had people have their pediatricians do 48 00:02:42,440 --> 00:02:44,480 Speaker 1: like ultrasounds on a breast bud in a ten year 49 00:02:44,480 --> 00:02:46,680 Speaker 1: old girl. It's like, what are you doing? Like that's 50 00:02:47,000 --> 00:02:50,760 Speaker 1: that is what happens, Like that's how it starts. So 51 00:02:50,880 --> 00:02:52,760 Speaker 1: I guess this is my soapbox to say that it 52 00:02:52,800 --> 00:02:56,320 Speaker 1: is actually normal for girls to begin the process of puberty, 53 00:02:56,800 --> 00:02:59,920 Speaker 1: which usually starts with small amount of breast tissue sometimes 54 00:03:00,040 --> 00:03:03,400 Speaker 1: little bit of hair growth around age eight. Now, that 55 00:03:03,520 --> 00:03:06,799 Speaker 1: is not average. That is the earliest, like acceptable of normal. 56 00:03:06,840 --> 00:03:09,640 Speaker 1: And if it's happening before then, or if it's rapidly progressing, 57 00:03:09,720 --> 00:03:12,080 Speaker 1: I highly encourage you to seek advice from an expert 58 00:03:12,120 --> 00:03:15,120 Speaker 1: such as your pediatrician or ask for a referral. And 59 00:03:15,240 --> 00:03:17,480 Speaker 1: there is usually a family component, so if the parents 60 00:03:17,520 --> 00:03:19,560 Speaker 1: mature earlier, usually the kids are going to mature on 61 00:03:19,600 --> 00:03:21,480 Speaker 1: the early side, so the family history is helpful, but 62 00:03:21,560 --> 00:03:23,680 Speaker 1: eight is kind of the earliest acceptable limit of normal 63 00:03:23,680 --> 00:03:26,240 Speaker 1: for girls and nine for boys, although I still kind 64 00:03:26,240 --> 00:03:28,079 Speaker 1: of get nervous in a nine year old boy because 65 00:03:28,080 --> 00:03:30,919 Speaker 1: it's pretty uncommon. That's a pretty young age. But by 66 00:03:31,040 --> 00:03:33,040 Speaker 1: ten that that can be normal in boys and the 67 00:03:33,080 --> 00:03:35,440 Speaker 1: boys first, I wonder if kids are listening to the 68 00:03:35,480 --> 00:03:38,440 Speaker 1: well whatever, they can hear anatomy words, But when you 69 00:03:38,440 --> 00:03:40,360 Speaker 1: have a little bit of testicular growth, that's usually the 70 00:03:40,360 --> 00:03:43,760 Speaker 1: first very subtle sign of male and puberty. At that age. 71 00:03:43,760 --> 00:03:45,960 Speaker 1: Your kids may not be showing you those things, so 72 00:03:46,000 --> 00:03:48,240 Speaker 1: you may not be aware when it's happening in boys actually, 73 00:03:48,280 --> 00:03:50,400 Speaker 1: but you know their pediatrician may check it at the checkup, 74 00:03:50,440 --> 00:03:52,320 Speaker 1: and then you'll see things like odor and body hair 75 00:03:52,320 --> 00:03:54,480 Speaker 1: growth and all that kind of stuff. And then again, 76 00:03:54,520 --> 00:03:56,520 Speaker 1: puberty is like a several year type of a thing, 77 00:03:56,680 --> 00:03:59,640 Speaker 1: so you know, if a girl starts with a little 78 00:03:59,640 --> 00:04:02,240 Speaker 1: bit of signs at age ten, you might expect a 79 00:04:02,280 --> 00:04:04,880 Speaker 1: period at age twelve or thirteen, so there is kind 80 00:04:04,920 --> 00:04:07,040 Speaker 1: of some time between that, like a two to three 81 00:04:07,120 --> 00:04:12,960 Speaker 1: year gap. Yeah, then exactly, and once girls get their periods, 82 00:04:12,960 --> 00:04:17,720 Speaker 1: do they stop growing. Is that that that's usually so 83 00:04:18,000 --> 00:04:21,279 Speaker 1: the earlier they get their period, the more growth is 84 00:04:21,279 --> 00:04:24,719 Speaker 1: typically left. I've actually reviewed a recent study. I don't 85 00:04:24,720 --> 00:04:26,240 Speaker 1: know if it was recent, but I recently was reviewing 86 00:04:26,240 --> 00:04:27,480 Speaker 1: a study on this because I was trying to give 87 00:04:27,480 --> 00:04:30,440 Speaker 1: a parent some significant data. If a child has early 88 00:04:30,800 --> 00:04:33,040 Speaker 1: onset of their period called which is called monarchy is 89 00:04:33,080 --> 00:04:34,760 Speaker 1: the fancy word for that, Like at age you know, 90 00:04:34,800 --> 00:04:37,320 Speaker 1: eleven or ten, you often can expect three to four 91 00:04:37,360 --> 00:04:39,480 Speaker 1: inches of growth. If they're on the late side, it's 92 00:04:39,520 --> 00:04:42,200 Speaker 1: usually more like two inches of growth, but they usually 93 00:04:42,200 --> 00:04:45,440 Speaker 1: have completed their spurt by the time they have their period. 94 00:04:45,520 --> 00:04:49,040 Speaker 1: So girls do stop growing far far age wise, typically 95 00:04:49,160 --> 00:04:53,479 Speaker 1: before boys do. Okay, And in terms of sort of 96 00:04:53,520 --> 00:04:56,200 Speaker 1: the normal age range for boys, he said, like ten 97 00:04:56,279 --> 00:04:58,760 Speaker 1: was really on the early side. When ten for things 98 00:04:58,800 --> 00:05:01,159 Speaker 1: to start would be like early norm And then the 99 00:05:01,320 --> 00:05:03,320 Speaker 1: latest that it would be normal to start is right 100 00:05:03,360 --> 00:05:05,800 Speaker 1: around fourteen. So if there's really no signs of anything 101 00:05:05,800 --> 00:05:09,160 Speaker 1: happening by fourteen, that's when kids boys will often get 102 00:05:09,160 --> 00:05:11,880 Speaker 1: referred and sometimes you know, get some testing and sometimes 103 00:05:11,960 --> 00:05:16,719 Speaker 1: even some treatment. Long process, so long process that is, 104 00:05:16,800 --> 00:05:21,359 Speaker 1: like it's surprisingly mysterious considering that it happens to every 105 00:05:21,600 --> 00:05:24,800 Speaker 1: pretty much every person. It kind of yeah, yeah, no, 106 00:05:24,880 --> 00:05:27,120 Speaker 1: that is that is pretty funny. And does it tend 107 00:05:27,120 --> 00:05:30,280 Speaker 1: to be the same from the same gender parent to 108 00:05:30,400 --> 00:05:33,480 Speaker 1: the child or would be from the other side question. 109 00:05:33,600 --> 00:05:35,640 Speaker 1: I feel like I feel like, well, number one, sometimes 110 00:05:35,920 --> 00:05:38,520 Speaker 1: it could like resemble either side. And that's exactly so 111 00:05:38,600 --> 00:05:40,680 Speaker 1: if if you have a dad who like you know, 112 00:05:40,760 --> 00:05:43,080 Speaker 1: grew a beard at thirteen and like was finished growing 113 00:05:43,120 --> 00:05:46,000 Speaker 1: by fourteen and like, you know, very early, it wouldn't 114 00:05:46,040 --> 00:05:49,040 Speaker 1: be that surprising for that person's daughter, say to start 115 00:05:49,080 --> 00:05:52,680 Speaker 1: maturing early, even if the mom didn't, because it can 116 00:05:52,720 --> 00:05:55,320 Speaker 1: really come from either side, and all of us is 117 00:05:55,360 --> 00:05:57,719 Speaker 1: regulated by some Really, I'm not going to get into 118 00:05:57,720 --> 00:06:00,360 Speaker 1: that because I wouldn't even memorize every detail. But like, 119 00:06:00,400 --> 00:06:02,880 Speaker 1: there are different genes basically in the hypothalamus to tell 120 00:06:02,880 --> 00:06:06,080 Speaker 1: the pituitary like when to wake up and start stimulating 121 00:06:06,080 --> 00:06:09,000 Speaker 1: the gonads to make hormone, and those are to some 122 00:06:09,080 --> 00:06:11,960 Speaker 1: degree inherited in their sensitivity and like what gets them 123 00:06:12,000 --> 00:06:13,920 Speaker 1: started and so on. And then then and the fact 124 00:06:13,960 --> 00:06:19,440 Speaker 1: that there's specific inherited that is the fascinating part. That's yes, 125 00:06:19,640 --> 00:06:21,960 Speaker 1: non gen well, neither is height. You know, like if 126 00:06:21,960 --> 00:06:25,120 Speaker 1: you have a very tall dad and a short mom, 127 00:06:25,320 --> 00:06:27,560 Speaker 1: like both kids might end up somewhere in between. It's 128 00:06:27,560 --> 00:06:29,159 Speaker 1: not like, oh, every boy we have is going to 129 00:06:29,160 --> 00:06:30,840 Speaker 1: be tall and every girl we have is going to 130 00:06:30,880 --> 00:06:34,400 Speaker 1: be short, Like, it doesn't work that way. It's amazing. Yeah, 131 00:06:34,800 --> 00:06:37,280 Speaker 1: oh cool stuff. I mean, as we talked about in 132 00:06:37,279 --> 00:06:39,880 Speaker 1: an earlier episode, And there are some definite upsides of 133 00:06:39,960 --> 00:06:42,200 Speaker 1: kids coming into the tween and teen age and I'm 134 00:06:42,240 --> 00:06:47,960 Speaker 1: being like old enough to supervise themselves occasionally sometimes supervise 135 00:06:49,120 --> 00:06:52,520 Speaker 1: younger siblings. How old were you when you started babysitting. 136 00:06:53,360 --> 00:06:56,360 Speaker 1: I think I was like twelve or thirteen, and I 137 00:06:56,520 --> 00:06:59,640 Speaker 1: was a camp like cit so I felt like that 138 00:06:59,680 --> 00:07:02,560 Speaker 1: gave me pretty good experience. And then I became like 139 00:07:02,600 --> 00:07:05,880 Speaker 1: an assistant counselor, so I got pretty adept at managing 140 00:07:05,960 --> 00:07:07,640 Speaker 1: kind of like four or five year old kids, and 141 00:07:07,680 --> 00:07:10,080 Speaker 1: then I started to have some like younger charges. But yeah, 142 00:07:10,080 --> 00:07:13,400 Speaker 1: I think I think around like thirteen, suwhere between twelve 143 00:07:13,440 --> 00:07:15,160 Speaker 1: and fourteen, And I took like one of those classic 144 00:07:15,240 --> 00:07:17,800 Speaker 1: like babysitting classes at the hospital. I remember doing that. 145 00:07:18,120 --> 00:07:20,800 Speaker 1: I think it was a American Red Cross babysitter class. 146 00:07:20,840 --> 00:07:23,040 Speaker 1: I think I was eleven, which is when you could 147 00:07:23,080 --> 00:07:26,280 Speaker 1: do it right, and I learned I mean, I'm old 148 00:07:26,360 --> 00:07:30,440 Speaker 1: enough that they were teaching diaper pinning. They must have 149 00:07:30,480 --> 00:07:33,000 Speaker 1: been the time that was everyone was transitioning out. It's 150 00:07:33,040 --> 00:07:35,680 Speaker 1: done that to me too, I don't remember. That's very interesting. 151 00:07:36,000 --> 00:07:37,960 Speaker 1: But so I had, you know, my technique of like, 152 00:07:38,440 --> 00:07:40,520 Speaker 1: you know, Dancy, you're not going to poke the kid, 153 00:07:40,600 --> 00:07:43,840 Speaker 1: and I have my dipe. The reason I even was 154 00:07:43,840 --> 00:07:45,360 Speaker 1: thinking about it is because I learned my technique of 155 00:07:45,400 --> 00:07:48,840 Speaker 1: holding the children's legs like with fingers between the ankles 156 00:07:48,920 --> 00:07:51,840 Speaker 1: so that their ankles aren't, you know, hitting each other 157 00:07:51,880 --> 00:07:54,600 Speaker 1: when you're when you're changing the diaper wiping, and that 158 00:07:54,600 --> 00:07:57,640 Speaker 1: that was actually taught there. And who knows if that's 159 00:07:57,680 --> 00:07:59,640 Speaker 1: the right way to change the diaper, but I have 160 00:07:59,720 --> 00:08:03,360 Speaker 1: changed a lot of diapers with that technique. So who 161 00:08:03,440 --> 00:08:05,560 Speaker 1: knew that when they were teaching this eleven year old 162 00:08:05,600 --> 00:08:09,240 Speaker 1: girl how to do this, that that was the skill 163 00:08:09,320 --> 00:08:12,400 Speaker 1: she learned uses every day. This is a perfect conversation 164 00:08:12,600 --> 00:08:15,800 Speaker 1: to introduce our guests because Meghan has kids on both 165 00:08:15,880 --> 00:08:18,960 Speaker 1: ends of that spectrum. She has babies and teens, so that, yeah, 166 00:08:19,080 --> 00:08:21,560 Speaker 1: so we'll hear what Meghan has to say about this. 167 00:08:22,760 --> 00:08:25,840 Speaker 1: I am so excited to welcome Megan Hyatt Miller to 168 00:08:25,920 --> 00:08:29,720 Speaker 1: our podcast today. Meghan is the CEO of Michael Hyatt 169 00:08:29,760 --> 00:08:32,600 Speaker 1: and Company, and she is a powerful voice that I 170 00:08:32,640 --> 00:08:34,800 Speaker 1: have been following for quite some time. So I'm so 171 00:08:35,000 --> 00:08:37,880 Speaker 1: excited to welcome you on the show. Megan. Hey, Sarah, 172 00:08:37,920 --> 00:08:40,520 Speaker 1: thank you so much for having me. I am excited 173 00:08:40,559 --> 00:08:43,400 Speaker 1: to talk to you today. Yes, and when you reached 174 00:08:43,440 --> 00:08:46,280 Speaker 1: out because you do have a very exciting book coming out, 175 00:08:46,600 --> 00:08:50,800 Speaker 1: we were thrilled because your ideas meshed so well with ours. 176 00:08:51,520 --> 00:08:53,439 Speaker 1: Can you tell a little bit about your story and 177 00:08:53,800 --> 00:08:56,280 Speaker 1: how you came to be the CEO at a company 178 00:08:56,320 --> 00:08:59,800 Speaker 1: that your dad started? Yeah. Absolutely, Well. The book is 179 00:08:59,840 --> 00:09:02,680 Speaker 1: called When It Work and Succeed at Life. It's all 180 00:09:02,800 --> 00:09:04,959 Speaker 1: about how to get something that my dad and I 181 00:09:05,080 --> 00:09:08,120 Speaker 1: call the double win, which is defined as winning at 182 00:09:08,160 --> 00:09:11,080 Speaker 1: work and succeeding at life. Because basically, what we find 183 00:09:11,200 --> 00:09:13,880 Speaker 1: is that in kind of the culture at large, were 184 00:09:13,920 --> 00:09:17,439 Speaker 1: really given two options. One is this thing called the 185 00:09:17,480 --> 00:09:19,760 Speaker 1: hustle fallacy, where you know, we just sort of put 186 00:09:19,800 --> 00:09:22,920 Speaker 1: all areas of our life except our work on hold, 187 00:09:23,160 --> 00:09:26,160 Speaker 1: and we just go, you know, pedal to the metal 188 00:09:26,600 --> 00:09:28,920 Speaker 1: and hope that it's just temporary so we can get 189 00:09:28,920 --> 00:09:31,040 Speaker 1: to kind of the next place in our career, our business, 190 00:09:31,480 --> 00:09:34,280 Speaker 1: or we pump the ambition break as we call it, 191 00:09:34,679 --> 00:09:38,080 Speaker 1: and kind of sideline our professional potential in favor of 192 00:09:38,120 --> 00:09:40,080 Speaker 1: those other areas of our life that we know matter, 193 00:09:40,120 --> 00:09:42,800 Speaker 1: because we don't want to have regrets and we say, like, 194 00:09:42,840 --> 00:09:44,520 Speaker 1: there's got to be a better way. We know there's 195 00:09:44,520 --> 00:09:46,240 Speaker 1: a better way. It's called the double win. It's the 196 00:09:46,280 --> 00:09:50,200 Speaker 1: third option, and that really is kind of the basis 197 00:09:50,240 --> 00:09:52,839 Speaker 1: for my story. So, as you said, I'm the CEO 198 00:09:52,920 --> 00:09:55,760 Speaker 1: of Michael Hyde and Company. We're a performance coaching company. 199 00:09:55,880 --> 00:10:00,800 Speaker 1: We help leaders in their teams get the vision, alignment 200 00:10:00,920 --> 00:10:03,439 Speaker 1: and execution that they need to get that double win 201 00:10:04,000 --> 00:10:05,920 Speaker 1: so they can win at work and succeed at life. 202 00:10:05,960 --> 00:10:08,880 Speaker 1: And we do group coaching, one on one coaching, corporate training, 203 00:10:08,920 --> 00:10:11,560 Speaker 1: and then we also have a physical planner product called 204 00:10:11,559 --> 00:10:16,440 Speaker 1: the Full Focused Planner. But back in twenty twelve, I 205 00:10:16,440 --> 00:10:19,360 Speaker 1: had just adopted two boys from Uganda who are now 206 00:10:19,400 --> 00:10:22,360 Speaker 1: twelve and ten. Back then they were much younger, of course, 207 00:10:22,679 --> 00:10:24,719 Speaker 1: and I had inherited two kids through marriage a couple 208 00:10:24,760 --> 00:10:26,079 Speaker 1: of years before that. So all of a sudden I 209 00:10:26,120 --> 00:10:29,800 Speaker 1: had four kids and our business was taking off. I 210 00:10:29,840 --> 00:10:32,839 Speaker 1: was working with my dad, and you know, he said, 211 00:10:33,520 --> 00:10:35,080 Speaker 1: I really think a couple of years after that, I 212 00:10:35,120 --> 00:10:37,720 Speaker 1: really think I would like for you to take overrunning 213 00:10:37,760 --> 00:10:39,480 Speaker 1: the business. I wasn't yet the CEO. He wanted to 214 00:10:39,520 --> 00:10:43,120 Speaker 1: make me the COO. And I said, oh, Dad, I 215 00:10:43,200 --> 00:10:45,720 Speaker 1: really want to do this. I really think I can 216 00:10:45,880 --> 00:10:48,480 Speaker 1: do this, but I've got these kids who have some 217 00:10:48,520 --> 00:10:51,760 Speaker 1: special needs and really need my attention. I can only 218 00:10:51,800 --> 00:10:53,280 Speaker 1: do this if I could be done at three thirty 219 00:10:53,320 --> 00:10:54,640 Speaker 1: every day. I've got to be the one to pick 220 00:10:54,679 --> 00:10:57,119 Speaker 1: them up from school. They need me in the afternoons. 221 00:10:57,160 --> 00:10:58,559 Speaker 1: If they're going to really get to a place where 222 00:10:58,600 --> 00:11:02,280 Speaker 1: they're thriving, you got to be present. And he said, okay, great, 223 00:11:02,320 --> 00:11:04,120 Speaker 1: I don't care. As long as you know you've accomplished 224 00:11:04,120 --> 00:11:07,440 Speaker 1: the professional results, that's fine. And that was really kind 225 00:11:07,440 --> 00:11:10,600 Speaker 1: of the beginning of my journey to the double win 226 00:11:10,720 --> 00:11:14,280 Speaker 1: because I had this opportunity ahead of me, but I 227 00:11:14,320 --> 00:11:16,760 Speaker 1: also had high stakes at home that I knew I 228 00:11:16,800 --> 00:11:20,520 Speaker 1: couldn't afford to neglect. It felt kind of like in 229 00:11:20,559 --> 00:11:24,880 Speaker 1: a possible choice, but ultimately I found this resolution in 230 00:11:25,720 --> 00:11:29,480 Speaker 1: pursuing you know, the double win, and it's been a 231 00:11:29,520 --> 00:11:31,600 Speaker 1: really neat journey. I now have a fifth child. We 232 00:11:31,600 --> 00:11:35,040 Speaker 1: adopted a baby two years ago who's turning to this 233 00:11:35,120 --> 00:11:38,319 Speaker 1: weekend actually, and so that's been another chapter of this 234 00:11:38,400 --> 00:11:41,000 Speaker 1: story to try to figure out as well. A little 235 00:11:41,000 --> 00:11:44,559 Speaker 1: girl I think super cute, right y, you're so cute. 236 00:11:45,200 --> 00:11:50,600 Speaker 1: I have seen pictures there with me. I have to know, 237 00:11:50,800 --> 00:11:53,640 Speaker 1: was this something you always envisioned for yourself when you 238 00:11:53,679 --> 00:11:55,920 Speaker 1: were younger growing up? Did you think you would be 239 00:11:56,720 --> 00:11:59,280 Speaker 1: more at home? Did you think that because your your 240 00:11:59,320 --> 00:12:01,319 Speaker 1: model was that you're I think your mom stayed home 241 00:12:01,360 --> 00:12:03,520 Speaker 1: and you're absolutely, but it was very busy and very 242 00:12:03,559 --> 00:12:06,000 Speaker 1: active totally. But yeah, I mean my parents have very 243 00:12:06,000 --> 00:12:08,600 Speaker 1: traditional kind of roles in their marriage. I didn't know 244 00:12:08,640 --> 00:12:12,120 Speaker 1: any women who had significant careers, you know, I kind 245 00:12:12,120 --> 00:12:14,200 Speaker 1: of grew up. I was born in nineteen eighty, so 246 00:12:15,040 --> 00:12:16,880 Speaker 1: kind of a lot of stay at home moms at 247 00:12:16,880 --> 00:12:18,480 Speaker 1: that point. And I have, you know, lots of great 248 00:12:18,480 --> 00:12:20,360 Speaker 1: friends who were stay at home moms and totally killing 249 00:12:20,360 --> 00:12:22,160 Speaker 1: it at doing that. But that was really the only 250 00:12:22,200 --> 00:12:25,480 Speaker 1: option that I saw. So it really wasn't something that 251 00:12:25,559 --> 00:12:28,120 Speaker 1: I had thought a lot about until I was in college, 252 00:12:28,120 --> 00:12:30,200 Speaker 1: and then I really kind of struggled with it because 253 00:12:30,240 --> 00:12:32,280 Speaker 1: I knew I wanted to have a family. I knew 254 00:12:32,280 --> 00:12:34,320 Speaker 1: I wanted to have a big family, and so I 255 00:12:34,360 --> 00:12:37,800 Speaker 1: think most of my growing up years, I really thought 256 00:12:38,280 --> 00:12:40,040 Speaker 1: I would have to make a choice, you know, that 257 00:12:40,080 --> 00:12:42,720 Speaker 1: I could either have a big family and be really 258 00:12:42,760 --> 00:12:45,480 Speaker 1: engaged at home and that would be good for my kids, 259 00:12:45,679 --> 00:12:48,200 Speaker 1: or you know, there were these career women and they 260 00:12:48,200 --> 00:12:51,040 Speaker 1: didn't really prioritize their families. And as I've found out, 261 00:12:51,160 --> 00:12:53,959 Speaker 1: you know, over the over the years, that's a really 262 00:12:54,000 --> 00:12:57,600 Speaker 1: false dichotomy that that's something that you want. It is 263 00:12:57,760 --> 00:12:59,920 Speaker 1: possible to do both, but it takes a lot of intent, 264 00:13:00,360 --> 00:13:02,320 Speaker 1: a lot of vision for your life and what your 265 00:13:02,400 --> 00:13:04,040 Speaker 1: kind of non negotiables are going to be, which is 266 00:13:04,080 --> 00:13:06,120 Speaker 1: something we talk about in this book when it work 267 00:13:06,120 --> 00:13:08,840 Speaker 1: and succeed at life, something that I've worked really hard 268 00:13:08,880 --> 00:13:12,640 Speaker 1: on myself to make it possible to do both well, 269 00:13:13,559 --> 00:13:16,280 Speaker 1: not perfectly, by the way, but well because it's perfection 270 00:13:16,440 --> 00:13:18,280 Speaker 1: is an illusion. It's important to say that, I think, 271 00:13:18,559 --> 00:13:21,920 Speaker 1: and perfection sometimes can be the enemy. I think, absolutely, 272 00:13:22,440 --> 00:13:25,200 Speaker 1: what would you say? I feel like there's this popular 273 00:13:25,280 --> 00:13:27,240 Speaker 1: narrative that Laura and I have talked about a lot 274 00:13:27,280 --> 00:13:30,160 Speaker 1: where you get to a really hard phase in parenting 275 00:13:30,200 --> 00:13:33,400 Speaker 1: and everything just seems unmanageable, and at that point a 276 00:13:33,440 --> 00:13:36,679 Speaker 1: lot of women do kind of understandably choose to sure 277 00:13:37,000 --> 00:13:39,880 Speaker 1: decide to turn around or throw it or take a break. 278 00:13:41,080 --> 00:13:42,839 Speaker 1: Did you ever go through anything like that or what 279 00:13:42,880 --> 00:13:45,240 Speaker 1: would you say to someone going through that kind of 280 00:13:45,280 --> 00:13:48,040 Speaker 1: a dilemma. Well, I mean I've got through that several 281 00:13:48,040 --> 00:13:50,440 Speaker 1: times with five kids. You can imagine, you know, we 282 00:13:50,520 --> 00:13:52,640 Speaker 1: have our children at ages twenty to two, so we 283 00:13:52,679 --> 00:13:55,320 Speaker 1: really have children at every single stage except newborn. At 284 00:13:55,320 --> 00:13:58,000 Speaker 1: this point. You know, we've got people launching into adulthood, 285 00:13:58,080 --> 00:14:01,880 Speaker 1: going to college, going into middle school, elementary school, and toddler. 286 00:14:01,960 --> 00:14:05,120 Speaker 1: So we've got it all. I think several times that's 287 00:14:05,120 --> 00:14:07,480 Speaker 1: happened for me. I remember at one point my boys 288 00:14:07,480 --> 00:14:09,440 Speaker 1: were really having a hard time. You know, if you're 289 00:14:09,800 --> 00:14:12,920 Speaker 1: not very familiar with adoption, if children are available for adoption, 290 00:14:12,960 --> 00:14:15,600 Speaker 1: there's usually a lot of hard circumstances kind of leading 291 00:14:15,679 --> 00:14:17,240 Speaker 1: up to that, a lot to heal from on the 292 00:14:17,240 --> 00:14:19,120 Speaker 1: backside of that. And I ended up needing to take 293 00:14:19,120 --> 00:14:22,120 Speaker 1: a leave of absence for a month at one point 294 00:14:22,160 --> 00:14:24,680 Speaker 1: a few years ago to really do some intensive work 295 00:14:24,720 --> 00:14:28,040 Speaker 1: with our kids and really help them. And I wondered 296 00:14:28,080 --> 00:14:29,640 Speaker 1: at that point could I keep it up, you know, 297 00:14:29,920 --> 00:14:32,840 Speaker 1: were their needs and the needs of our family going 298 00:14:32,960 --> 00:14:36,040 Speaker 1: to kind of dictate that it was time to step away. 299 00:14:36,040 --> 00:14:38,800 Speaker 1: I didn't want that to happen. And then again, when 300 00:14:38,840 --> 00:14:42,640 Speaker 1: we adopted two years ago, I took a three month 301 00:14:42,760 --> 00:14:46,360 Speaker 1: maternity leave as the CEO of our company at that 302 00:14:46,440 --> 00:14:49,160 Speaker 1: point with a daughter who was in the nick you 303 00:14:49,400 --> 00:14:53,200 Speaker 1: for you know, fifteen weeks and so we joined her 304 00:14:53,200 --> 00:14:56,120 Speaker 1: at about five weeks in she joined our family, and 305 00:14:56,200 --> 00:14:57,920 Speaker 1: so you know, that was a whole thing too. And 306 00:14:57,920 --> 00:14:59,880 Speaker 1: then she came home and she had some medical needs 307 00:15:00,040 --> 00:15:02,160 Speaker 1: as well. So I mean, I think that's a question 308 00:15:02,200 --> 00:15:06,000 Speaker 1: that I have asked many times. I think what has 309 00:15:06,480 --> 00:15:10,040 Speaker 1: enabled me to keep going. Number one is asking for 310 00:15:10,120 --> 00:15:13,160 Speaker 1: help and building a team around me on the home side, 311 00:15:13,160 --> 00:15:15,680 Speaker 1: which I've done at various levels throughout my career as 312 00:15:15,720 --> 00:15:19,440 Speaker 1: resources have allowed, you know, as simple as having family 313 00:15:19,440 --> 00:15:21,960 Speaker 1: members help all the way up to having employees in 314 00:15:22,000 --> 00:15:24,040 Speaker 1: our home helping at this point, which is really great, 315 00:15:24,120 --> 00:15:26,440 Speaker 1: you know, but there's there's all a bit at every 316 00:15:26,520 --> 00:15:30,600 Speaker 1: possible stage of that. But I've also had a real 317 00:15:30,680 --> 00:15:34,480 Speaker 1: clarity around what was my unique contribution both at work 318 00:15:34,560 --> 00:15:36,960 Speaker 1: and at home, where did I really do the high 319 00:15:37,480 --> 00:15:41,600 Speaker 1: leverage work, meaning I got a disproportionate kind of return 320 00:15:41,640 --> 00:15:46,000 Speaker 1: on investment. To use business language on my contribution in 321 00:15:46,040 --> 00:15:48,720 Speaker 1: our business, but also in my family. So, for example, 322 00:15:49,160 --> 00:15:51,440 Speaker 1: you know, I have determined one of the most important 323 00:15:51,480 --> 00:15:53,400 Speaker 1: non negotiables for me is I want to sit down 324 00:15:53,440 --> 00:15:56,120 Speaker 1: at the dinner table with my kids five nights a week. 325 00:15:56,280 --> 00:15:58,360 Speaker 1: It's not a non negotiable for me that I have 326 00:15:58,440 --> 00:16:00,360 Speaker 1: to cook. It's not a non negotiable that has to 327 00:16:00,400 --> 00:16:02,240 Speaker 1: be in real plates. It's not a non negotiable that 328 00:16:02,280 --> 00:16:04,400 Speaker 1: it even has to be necessarily healthy sometimes, you know. 329 00:16:04,480 --> 00:16:06,480 Speaker 1: But I want my kids to remember that we sat 330 00:16:06,760 --> 00:16:09,720 Speaker 1: at the table, and so I have really planned around 331 00:16:09,840 --> 00:16:13,160 Speaker 1: that and been very intentional. Other things are not important 332 00:16:13,200 --> 00:16:15,320 Speaker 1: to me. It's not important that I go to every 333 00:16:15,360 --> 00:16:17,640 Speaker 1: doctor's appointment. It's not important that I go to every 334 00:16:18,040 --> 00:16:20,360 Speaker 1: meeting at school. My husband and I share that, you know, 335 00:16:20,440 --> 00:16:24,240 Speaker 1: sometimes we delegate that to babysitters or whatever. But there 336 00:16:24,280 --> 00:16:28,160 Speaker 1: are certain things where I know it's really important for 337 00:16:28,240 --> 00:16:29,880 Speaker 1: me to be the person there, and I don't want 338 00:16:29,880 --> 00:16:32,000 Speaker 1: to miss those moments. And I think that clarity gives 339 00:16:32,040 --> 00:16:35,000 Speaker 1: me the freedom to keep going and keep pursuing my 340 00:16:35,080 --> 00:16:36,960 Speaker 1: career and make sure I'm not missing the moments that 341 00:16:37,080 --> 00:16:39,600 Speaker 1: matter most to my kids and to me. That is 342 00:16:39,640 --> 00:16:41,800 Speaker 1: so interesting, And I love that you even mentioned like 343 00:16:41,840 --> 00:16:45,400 Speaker 1: doctor's appointments, because sometimes I think we have to some 344 00:16:45,440 --> 00:16:47,000 Speaker 1: of us get in like we have to follow some 345 00:16:47,040 --> 00:16:49,600 Speaker 1: certain script like r oh, well right, I'm supposed to 346 00:16:49,600 --> 00:16:52,240 Speaker 1: do this, But there is that moment where you can 347 00:16:52,280 --> 00:16:55,360 Speaker 1: sit back and question, well, wait a second, actually, like 348 00:16:55,520 --> 00:16:58,800 Speaker 1: where am I most useful? Where am I most valuable? Right? 349 00:16:59,120 --> 00:17:02,600 Speaker 1: And so that's I love that. That is fantastic. Yeah, 350 00:17:02,760 --> 00:17:04,920 Speaker 1: can you name one or two things, well, maybe in 351 00:17:04,960 --> 00:17:07,480 Speaker 1: addition to doctors appointments that you have chosen to not 352 00:17:07,560 --> 00:17:10,040 Speaker 1: do because they don't add a lot of value, either 353 00:17:10,119 --> 00:17:13,520 Speaker 1: at work or at home or totally. Well, one of 354 00:17:13,600 --> 00:17:16,000 Speaker 1: the things that I've done at work is that I 355 00:17:16,080 --> 00:17:19,440 Speaker 1: have really worked hard with my team, my executive team. 356 00:17:19,440 --> 00:17:22,040 Speaker 1: I have six director reports, five executives, and one chief 357 00:17:22,040 --> 00:17:26,200 Speaker 1: of staff to have them kind of trained, so to speak, 358 00:17:26,280 --> 00:17:29,239 Speaker 1: to make recommendations for me, because decision fatigue is a 359 00:17:29,320 --> 00:17:32,320 Speaker 1: real challenge for women leaders, I mean any leaders, but 360 00:17:32,359 --> 00:17:35,200 Speaker 1: like especially for women because we're making so many decisions 361 00:17:35,240 --> 00:17:37,040 Speaker 1: in all areas of our life all the time, right, 362 00:17:37,080 --> 00:17:39,120 Speaker 1: and like, your brain can kind of only handle making 363 00:17:39,160 --> 00:17:41,360 Speaker 1: so many decisions, even if like me, you're a good 364 00:17:41,359 --> 00:17:43,640 Speaker 1: decision maker. And so what I've found is that if 365 00:17:43,640 --> 00:17:46,159 Speaker 1: I can have the people in my life who and 366 00:17:46,240 --> 00:17:48,000 Speaker 1: this is true at home and at work, who are 367 00:17:48,119 --> 00:17:51,560 Speaker 1: the experts make a recommendation, what only I can do 368 00:17:51,640 --> 00:17:53,200 Speaker 1: is say yes or no because I have the big 369 00:17:53,240 --> 00:17:56,359 Speaker 1: picture of the financial context or whatever. But if they 370 00:17:56,440 --> 00:17:59,080 Speaker 1: will do the heavy lifting of making the recommendation, that 371 00:17:59,280 --> 00:18:01,320 Speaker 1: saves so much work. And I have to kind of 372 00:18:01,400 --> 00:18:03,919 Speaker 1: remind myself of this on a regular basis, because sometimes 373 00:18:03,920 --> 00:18:06,560 Speaker 1: I find myself sneaking back into the middle of the decision. 374 00:18:06,560 --> 00:18:08,360 Speaker 1: I'm like, oh, no, no, no, they need to make 375 00:18:08,359 --> 00:18:10,840 Speaker 1: a recommendation, and that keeps me from being the bottleneck 376 00:18:10,920 --> 00:18:12,800 Speaker 1: for them. So that's a good example, I think on 377 00:18:12,840 --> 00:18:16,040 Speaker 1: the work side. On the home side, we were recently 378 00:18:16,040 --> 00:18:19,679 Speaker 1: in the process of applying to schools. So we're at 379 00:18:19,720 --> 00:18:22,159 Speaker 1: the end of elementary school with one of our sons 380 00:18:22,480 --> 00:18:24,399 Speaker 1: moving into middle school, and we were applying to three 381 00:18:24,440 --> 00:18:27,439 Speaker 1: or four different private schools, and my husband and I 382 00:18:27,520 --> 00:18:29,320 Speaker 1: talked about this. This is one of the things I 383 00:18:29,359 --> 00:18:31,520 Speaker 1: think has been really helpful for us is we looked 384 00:18:31,560 --> 00:18:34,440 Speaker 1: at all the kind of responsibilities at home and recently 385 00:18:34,480 --> 00:18:38,080 Speaker 1: renegotiated those in the last six or eight months and said, okay, 386 00:18:38,400 --> 00:18:41,440 Speaker 1: this is a little unequal. And he's an amazing partner, 387 00:18:41,480 --> 00:18:43,239 Speaker 1: you know, he always wants it to be equitable, but 388 00:18:43,280 --> 00:18:46,000 Speaker 1: you know, it just kind of drifts sometimes. And he said, 389 00:18:46,000 --> 00:18:48,960 Speaker 1: why don't I take over the school application process and 390 00:18:49,000 --> 00:18:51,480 Speaker 1: so like I would go to the very last meeting, 391 00:18:51,640 --> 00:18:53,000 Speaker 1: you know, and all that, but he would go to 392 00:18:53,040 --> 00:18:55,359 Speaker 1: two or three meetings before that, or he would correspond 393 00:18:55,400 --> 00:18:58,840 Speaker 1: with the admissions people and that was huge. I had 394 00:18:58,840 --> 00:19:02,199 Speaker 1: not delegated something like that before to him, and he 395 00:19:02,240 --> 00:19:05,560 Speaker 1: did a great job, you know. And we share doctors appointments. 396 00:19:05,560 --> 00:19:07,280 Speaker 1: We try to kind of split those up fifty to fifty. 397 00:19:08,040 --> 00:19:09,439 Speaker 1: So that's kind of one of the other things that 398 00:19:09,480 --> 00:19:13,040 Speaker 1: we do. But it's just like reimagining this again, where's 399 00:19:13,080 --> 00:19:15,879 Speaker 1: the leverage at work and at home? Like what for 400 00:19:16,000 --> 00:19:19,480 Speaker 1: me that comes down to what are my kids gonna remember? 401 00:19:20,320 --> 00:19:22,560 Speaker 1: You know, what is the thing that only I can 402 00:19:22,600 --> 00:19:25,160 Speaker 1: do or what is the thing at work and in 403 00:19:25,200 --> 00:19:29,040 Speaker 1: my business that drives the results, you know? And what 404 00:19:29,080 --> 00:19:31,480 Speaker 1: else can other people do that they can probably do 405 00:19:31,560 --> 00:19:33,919 Speaker 1: better than I can. That is so true, And I 406 00:19:33,960 --> 00:19:37,359 Speaker 1: love the reminder to renegotiate that discussion that you have 407 00:19:37,560 --> 00:19:40,080 Speaker 1: with your partner because everyone says to do it, but 408 00:19:40,119 --> 00:19:42,080 Speaker 1: it's not a set it and forget it kind of. 409 00:19:42,080 --> 00:19:45,480 Speaker 1: It's it's because kids get bigger, things changed. And the 410 00:19:45,520 --> 00:19:47,280 Speaker 1: other key thing that you mentioned that I want to 411 00:19:47,320 --> 00:19:49,800 Speaker 1: bring up is like, sometimes it's nice to just fully 412 00:19:49,840 --> 00:19:52,439 Speaker 1: delegate one thing, right, because if you were like, honey, 413 00:19:52,440 --> 00:19:54,639 Speaker 1: can you help me with school? Like what does that mean? Right? 414 00:19:55,040 --> 00:19:56,960 Speaker 1: But if it's like can you do it up until 415 00:19:56,960 --> 00:20:00,000 Speaker 1: the very last part, then it's very clear and you know, 416 00:20:00,080 --> 00:20:03,160 Speaker 1: oh kind of what's on everybody's plate. And most most 417 00:20:03,359 --> 00:20:05,000 Speaker 1: of the time people will rise to the occasion when 418 00:20:05,000 --> 00:20:08,280 Speaker 1: they know of, oh, it's their task. So that's such 419 00:20:08,320 --> 00:20:10,440 Speaker 1: a great example. Yeah, very very good. It's worked out 420 00:20:10,480 --> 00:20:25,760 Speaker 1: really well. What would you say you're this is a 421 00:20:25,840 --> 00:20:28,919 Speaker 1: random parenting question, but I'm often curious to ask this 422 00:20:28,960 --> 00:20:30,840 Speaker 1: one of people that have kids that have like you've 423 00:20:30,840 --> 00:20:34,320 Speaker 1: been through every stage of parents now like multiple times. 424 00:20:34,480 --> 00:20:37,280 Speaker 1: So what are your favorite stages and like anything you're 425 00:20:37,359 --> 00:20:40,880 Speaker 1: especially looking forward to or going to miss? Yeah, well, 426 00:20:40,960 --> 00:20:42,439 Speaker 1: I think the thing I'm going to miss is that 427 00:20:42,480 --> 00:20:46,080 Speaker 1: I've only gone through the tiny baby stage one time, 428 00:20:46,200 --> 00:20:48,760 Speaker 1: so all of my other children came to me later. 429 00:20:48,880 --> 00:20:51,840 Speaker 1: So when I got married, my two step kids were 430 00:20:51,880 --> 00:20:54,199 Speaker 1: seven and five. When we adopted our middle boys, they 431 00:20:54,200 --> 00:20:57,959 Speaker 1: were three and fourteen months. And then we adopted our daughter, 432 00:20:58,440 --> 00:21:00,679 Speaker 1: who's now too, when she was weeks old, and she 433 00:21:00,760 --> 00:21:04,080 Speaker 1: was extremely premature. She was twenty seven weeks, one pound 434 00:21:04,080 --> 00:21:06,200 Speaker 1: and two ounces, so she was really little. I really 435 00:21:06,280 --> 00:21:08,240 Speaker 1: when I said little baby, I got little little baby. 436 00:21:08,280 --> 00:21:09,840 Speaker 1: She was two pounds and four ounces by the time 437 00:21:09,840 --> 00:21:12,240 Speaker 1: we got to her, so she was anybody. And you know, 438 00:21:12,359 --> 00:21:15,760 Speaker 1: that was just a dream of mine in a really sweet, 439 00:21:15,840 --> 00:21:19,760 Speaker 1: precious time. Was also, of course exhausting, as every mom 440 00:21:19,800 --> 00:21:22,040 Speaker 1: will tell you, But every day I look at her 441 00:21:22,040 --> 00:21:24,840 Speaker 1: and I'm like, this, this is going so fast. What 442 00:21:24,920 --> 00:21:26,840 Speaker 1: I know after having five kids is that in the 443 00:21:26,840 --> 00:21:29,159 Speaker 1: blink of an EYI the twenty you know, and it 444 00:21:29,200 --> 00:21:31,919 Speaker 1: happened so quickly, and the days can feel long, but 445 00:21:32,040 --> 00:21:35,000 Speaker 1: my gosh, the years just go buy in a flash. 446 00:21:35,200 --> 00:21:37,040 Speaker 1: So you know, I think I'm going to miss that 447 00:21:37,119 --> 00:21:40,880 Speaker 1: because she's our last one. I think that transition into 448 00:21:40,880 --> 00:21:45,120 Speaker 1: adulthood is hard. It's a real privilege to be involved 449 00:21:45,160 --> 00:21:46,520 Speaker 1: with that as we're going through that with our two 450 00:21:46,520 --> 00:21:48,520 Speaker 1: older children. But it's hard, you know, there's a lot 451 00:21:48,560 --> 00:21:51,639 Speaker 1: of friction and chafing against I want to be independent. 452 00:21:51,760 --> 00:21:53,920 Speaker 1: I'm not quite independent. It's kind of it's funny. It's 453 00:21:53,920 --> 00:21:56,840 Speaker 1: almost like a repeat of the toddler stage, except like 454 00:21:57,119 --> 00:21:59,639 Speaker 1: they're much bigger, with much more independent than that point. 455 00:22:00,119 --> 00:22:04,240 Speaker 1: But the cars had cars, Yeah, and you know college 456 00:22:04,280 --> 00:22:06,719 Speaker 1: and jobs and you know apartments and all that kind 457 00:22:06,720 --> 00:22:10,240 Speaker 1: of stuff, and so I think that's challenging. But I 458 00:22:10,280 --> 00:22:14,080 Speaker 1: feel like every age has really special parts to it too, 459 00:22:14,200 --> 00:22:18,159 Speaker 1: And I think one of my challenges to myself is 460 00:22:18,200 --> 00:22:21,160 Speaker 1: to look for how to be grateful for each stage 461 00:22:21,440 --> 00:22:23,840 Speaker 1: while also being honest about the challenges of it, because 462 00:22:23,840 --> 00:22:26,160 Speaker 1: every stage has great things about it and really hard things. 463 00:22:26,200 --> 00:22:28,159 Speaker 1: Are two year old now, I mean every day, I'm like, 464 00:22:28,359 --> 00:22:30,359 Speaker 1: by seven o'clock when I put her down, I'm like, 465 00:22:30,400 --> 00:22:32,080 Speaker 1: there's a reason people do this when they're twenty and 466 00:22:32,119 --> 00:22:35,720 Speaker 1: not forty one, because this is this is a little exhausting. 467 00:22:35,880 --> 00:22:38,679 Speaker 1: And what's great about being forty one is I know 468 00:22:38,720 --> 00:22:41,000 Speaker 1: it goes fast and I'm really present to it, and 469 00:22:41,040 --> 00:22:42,679 Speaker 1: I you know, like try to soak it all in. 470 00:22:42,720 --> 00:22:46,080 Speaker 1: And I love that too. Yes, Oh, I totally see that. 471 00:22:46,119 --> 00:22:47,840 Speaker 1: And I think Laura is not on this today, but 472 00:22:47,920 --> 00:22:50,119 Speaker 1: she's had some of those same feelings and having her 473 00:22:50,240 --> 00:22:53,919 Speaker 1: last baby at that same time. For you, so you 474 00:22:54,000 --> 00:22:56,840 Speaker 1: mentioned like being able to end your day in a 475 00:22:56,880 --> 00:22:59,159 Speaker 1: really timely manner and be able to fully focus on 476 00:22:59,200 --> 00:23:01,560 Speaker 1: your family at dinner. Are you do you tend to 477 00:23:01,560 --> 00:23:03,840 Speaker 1: be a second shift person or are you truly able 478 00:23:03,920 --> 00:23:06,399 Speaker 1: to pretty much disconnect? And do you have any tips 479 00:23:06,400 --> 00:23:07,840 Speaker 1: for doing so because I know a lot of people 480 00:23:07,880 --> 00:23:10,320 Speaker 1: find that very challenging. Well, one of the things that 481 00:23:10,359 --> 00:23:12,720 Speaker 1: we talk about in the book When It Work and 482 00:23:12,720 --> 00:23:16,000 Speaker 1: succeed at Life is we talk about five different practices. 483 00:23:16,560 --> 00:23:21,359 Speaker 1: And the second practice is constraining your workday. And you know, 484 00:23:21,440 --> 00:23:25,439 Speaker 1: when we brought our boys home and I was looking 485 00:23:25,480 --> 00:23:27,760 Speaker 1: ahead at you know, becoming the COO and decided to 486 00:23:28,280 --> 00:23:29,560 Speaker 1: I could do it, but I could only do it 487 00:23:29,560 --> 00:23:31,080 Speaker 1: if I could be done at three point thirty. What 488 00:23:31,200 --> 00:23:34,919 Speaker 1: was amazing about putting that constraint in place is that 489 00:23:34,960 --> 00:23:38,320 Speaker 1: it really forced all kinds of other decisions around what 490 00:23:38,359 --> 00:23:40,600 Speaker 1: was high leverage. You know, I keep saying that that 491 00:23:40,680 --> 00:23:43,560 Speaker 1: phrase but you know what ultimately was going to deliver, 492 00:23:43,720 --> 00:23:46,800 Speaker 1: like the maximum amount amount of results in the minimum 493 00:23:46,800 --> 00:23:49,800 Speaker 1: amount of time. What was the unique contribution that only 494 00:23:49,840 --> 00:23:52,520 Speaker 1: I could make? And so I think one of the 495 00:23:52,520 --> 00:23:54,760 Speaker 1: things that happens when you put constraints in place, and 496 00:23:54,760 --> 00:23:57,040 Speaker 1: by that I really mean hard edges. So what time 497 00:23:57,080 --> 00:23:58,960 Speaker 1: you're going to start working, what time you're going to 498 00:23:59,080 --> 00:24:00,920 Speaker 1: end work, and then what you're going to do and 499 00:24:00,960 --> 00:24:02,840 Speaker 1: what you're going to allow in the off hours. And 500 00:24:02,880 --> 00:24:05,879 Speaker 1: for me, my constraints are nine to three. I don't 501 00:24:05,880 --> 00:24:08,719 Speaker 1: work before nine and I don't work after three, about, 502 00:24:09,000 --> 00:24:11,400 Speaker 1: you know, eighty five or ninety percent of the time. Course, occasionally, 503 00:24:11,480 --> 00:24:13,159 Speaker 1: you know, there's some hr thing that comes up, or 504 00:24:13,160 --> 00:24:15,240 Speaker 1: some emergency or whatever I have to deal with. That's 505 00:24:15,400 --> 00:24:19,080 Speaker 1: pretty infrequent though. And then when I'm not working, when 506 00:24:19,119 --> 00:24:21,840 Speaker 1: it's not those hours, I don't work at night, I 507 00:24:21,840 --> 00:24:24,440 Speaker 1: don't work on the weekend, I don't work on vacation. Again, 508 00:24:24,520 --> 00:24:26,360 Speaker 1: about eighty five or ninety percent of the time. Of course, 509 00:24:26,400 --> 00:24:30,399 Speaker 1: occasionally emergencies come up. What that does is it forces 510 00:24:30,440 --> 00:24:33,919 Speaker 1: you to make better decisions. In the time that you're working. 511 00:24:34,800 --> 00:24:37,880 Speaker 1: You're not doing things that are not high leverage you're 512 00:24:37,960 --> 00:24:40,520 Speaker 1: really doing the things that drive the results, and that's 513 00:24:40,800 --> 00:24:43,160 Speaker 1: you know, it's funny. This idea of the double win 514 00:24:44,200 --> 00:24:46,760 Speaker 1: is not just kind of a work life balance idea, 515 00:24:46,760 --> 00:24:48,600 Speaker 1: which sometimes I think it's kind of pooh pooed, either 516 00:24:48,640 --> 00:24:53,240 Speaker 1: because it's disappointed us or it seems so unattainable. This 517 00:24:53,320 --> 00:24:57,159 Speaker 1: is really a strategy for high performance at work and 518 00:24:57,240 --> 00:25:00,560 Speaker 1: at home. And what we have found in our business 519 00:25:00,680 --> 00:25:03,800 Speaker 1: is that and with our clients. We have about now 520 00:25:03,840 --> 00:25:07,280 Speaker 1: seven hundred small business owner coaching clients that come to 521 00:25:07,359 --> 00:25:10,280 Speaker 1: us once a quarter, and when they put these constraints 522 00:25:10,320 --> 00:25:15,880 Speaker 1: in place, their business results increase, their effectiveness as leaders increase, 523 00:25:16,160 --> 00:25:19,479 Speaker 1: and certainly their personal lives improve in terms of their 524 00:25:19,520 --> 00:25:22,480 Speaker 1: health and their most important relationships, et cetera, et cetera. 525 00:25:23,240 --> 00:25:25,880 Speaker 1: That is so cool, although it doesn't surprise me, because 526 00:25:26,280 --> 00:25:28,560 Speaker 1: it's true. You never are more productive than when you 527 00:25:28,680 --> 00:25:30,600 Speaker 1: know this is the time you're gonna leave, this is 528 00:25:30,640 --> 00:25:33,440 Speaker 1: the time you're gonna and everything's gonna fit in the middle, 529 00:25:33,560 --> 00:25:36,440 Speaker 1: so all of the dead time is kind of cut out. 530 00:25:36,520 --> 00:25:40,199 Speaker 1: So that's fantastic. What do you do to relax? What 531 00:25:40,280 --> 00:25:43,240 Speaker 1: are your favorite uses of downtime, whether those are things 532 00:25:43,560 --> 00:25:46,200 Speaker 1: on your own as well as things with your family. Yeah, 533 00:25:46,280 --> 00:25:49,439 Speaker 1: so our family. My parents have a lake house and 534 00:25:49,520 --> 00:25:52,800 Speaker 1: I have four younger sisters and we love to be 535 00:25:52,960 --> 00:25:55,119 Speaker 1: at the lake when the weather is nice. That's one 536 00:25:55,119 --> 00:25:57,119 Speaker 1: of my favorite things is being on the water. And 537 00:25:57,160 --> 00:25:59,280 Speaker 1: I'm determined this summer I'm going to learn how to surf. 538 00:25:59,320 --> 00:26:00,719 Speaker 1: We have a surf boat and I want to learn 539 00:26:00,760 --> 00:26:03,119 Speaker 1: how to do that. It's way outside of my comfort 540 00:26:03,200 --> 00:26:05,679 Speaker 1: zone that I've been working out and training for it, 541 00:26:05,720 --> 00:26:08,840 Speaker 1: so I'm hopeful I can do it. So that's one thing, 542 00:26:08,960 --> 00:26:10,879 Speaker 1: is just being out on the water. I love to fish. 543 00:26:11,040 --> 00:26:13,160 Speaker 1: I love to just you know, ride around on the boat. 544 00:26:13,200 --> 00:26:15,359 Speaker 1: I love to kayak whatever, and I love to do 545 00:26:15,400 --> 00:26:18,080 Speaker 1: that with the kids. So that's great, probably one of 546 00:26:18,080 --> 00:26:20,800 Speaker 1: my favorite things to do. My husband thinks he just 547 00:26:20,840 --> 00:26:22,720 Speaker 1: gets kick out of this, but I love to just 548 00:26:22,760 --> 00:26:25,359 Speaker 1: sit like quietly in my room with a stack of magazines. 549 00:26:25,400 --> 00:26:26,840 Speaker 1: Like if you if you see me going on a 550 00:26:26,840 --> 00:26:28,720 Speaker 1: trip by myself, which I have not, of course done 551 00:26:28,760 --> 00:26:31,720 Speaker 1: a long time. I always make stop by the bookstore 552 00:26:31,800 --> 00:26:33,879 Speaker 1: at the airport and I get a stack of magazines 553 00:26:33,880 --> 00:26:35,320 Speaker 1: and I'm like, I can't wait to get on the 554 00:26:35,320 --> 00:26:38,040 Speaker 1: plane read the magazines. You know. That's that's one of 555 00:26:38,119 --> 00:26:40,880 Speaker 1: my most favorite things to do. I also love to cook, 556 00:26:40,960 --> 00:26:43,560 Speaker 1: especially on the weekends when I have a little more time. 557 00:26:43,640 --> 00:26:45,320 Speaker 1: I'm not doing that quite as much as I used 558 00:26:45,359 --> 00:26:47,560 Speaker 1: to with my two year old daughter because she wants 559 00:26:47,640 --> 00:26:49,280 Speaker 1: to be held all in the middle of that, you know. 560 00:26:49,320 --> 00:26:51,520 Speaker 1: And so like last night we were measuring out the 561 00:26:51,600 --> 00:26:53,560 Speaker 1: rice together. It was, you know, it was really exciting. 562 00:26:53,600 --> 00:26:56,200 Speaker 1: But I love to cook. And then I'm going to 563 00:26:56,280 --> 00:26:58,240 Speaker 1: take up piano this year. This is going to be 564 00:26:58,320 --> 00:26:59,920 Speaker 1: kind of like a new hobby for me. This is 565 00:27:00,080 --> 00:27:01,399 Speaker 1: of the things we talked about in the book is 566 00:27:01,440 --> 00:27:05,159 Speaker 1: the value of non achievement. And I think, especially for women, 567 00:27:05,640 --> 00:27:08,280 Speaker 1: this is hard. This is like how do we possibly 568 00:27:08,359 --> 00:27:10,399 Speaker 1: have time for any of this? You know what, Like 569 00:27:10,640 --> 00:27:12,120 Speaker 1: I'll have to do this, you know when my kids 570 00:27:12,119 --> 00:27:14,440 Speaker 1: are grown and gone. But even just if it's fifteen 571 00:27:14,480 --> 00:27:17,680 Speaker 1: minutes a day, just something for yourself where you get 572 00:27:17,720 --> 00:27:21,119 Speaker 1: to cultivate and nurture a part of yourself that is 573 00:27:21,160 --> 00:27:23,480 Speaker 1: not related to work and it's not related to your kids, 574 00:27:23,800 --> 00:27:26,639 Speaker 1: I think is hugely valuable. So I'm going to do 575 00:27:26,800 --> 00:27:28,560 Speaker 1: piano lessons, which I haven't done since I was like 576 00:27:28,600 --> 00:27:31,359 Speaker 1: ten or twelve years old and learn to play the 577 00:27:31,400 --> 00:27:35,480 Speaker 1: piano again. I love that. That is such a great answer. Yeah, 578 00:27:35,480 --> 00:27:38,680 Speaker 1: and you covered all the realms family, home, cooking, piano, art, 579 00:27:39,119 --> 00:27:42,720 Speaker 1: and the stack of magazines. That's like a simple pleasures. 580 00:27:42,840 --> 00:27:45,600 Speaker 1: I love it. I love it too. I guess I 581 00:27:45,600 --> 00:27:48,080 Speaker 1: have one more cliche question before we get to our 582 00:27:48,119 --> 00:27:50,840 Speaker 1: favorite thing or love of the week, and that would be, 583 00:27:51,200 --> 00:27:53,879 Speaker 1: what would you tell young Megan, you know, before or 584 00:27:53,920 --> 00:27:55,720 Speaker 1: maybe before she had kids, Like if you were going 585 00:27:55,760 --> 00:27:58,240 Speaker 1: to give yourself one piece of advice, because some of 586 00:27:58,240 --> 00:28:00,240 Speaker 1: our listeners are kind of at the forefront, like they 587 00:28:00,280 --> 00:28:02,840 Speaker 1: don't have kids yet, but they're thinking about it. Yeah, 588 00:28:03,320 --> 00:28:05,520 Speaker 1: other than to read your book, what would you do? 589 00:28:05,960 --> 00:28:07,399 Speaker 1: You should do that too, but what else that it 590 00:28:07,400 --> 00:28:10,880 Speaker 1: would be great? You know, I would say that you 591 00:28:10,880 --> 00:28:14,040 Speaker 1: you can do anything you want, but you can't do 592 00:28:14,480 --> 00:28:18,080 Speaker 1: everything you want. And what I mean by that is, 593 00:28:18,240 --> 00:28:21,399 Speaker 1: I think when you have vision for your life and 594 00:28:21,440 --> 00:28:23,320 Speaker 1: you take the time to get clear on what do 595 00:28:23,359 --> 00:28:27,520 Speaker 1: you really want professionally, what do you really want for 596 00:28:27,800 --> 00:28:31,440 Speaker 1: your personal life, for your health, for your relationships, for 597 00:28:31,880 --> 00:28:34,640 Speaker 1: your impact in the community, you know, maybe your spiritual 598 00:28:34,640 --> 00:28:37,960 Speaker 1: life those things, I think there's always a way to 599 00:28:38,120 --> 00:28:41,200 Speaker 1: make those things fit. Everybody has the same amount of 600 00:28:41,240 --> 00:28:43,480 Speaker 1: time in their week, you know, And I think it's 601 00:28:43,600 --> 00:28:46,520 Speaker 1: possible to make those things fit and have a really 602 00:28:46,560 --> 00:28:49,760 Speaker 1: satisfying life. It's not possible to do it all. That 603 00:28:49,880 --> 00:28:53,120 Speaker 1: is a complete lie and it makes a lot of 604 00:28:53,200 --> 00:28:56,440 Speaker 1: us feel really badly about ourself and it's not helpful. 605 00:28:56,520 --> 00:28:58,720 Speaker 1: But you can do the things. There is enough time 606 00:28:58,720 --> 00:29:01,160 Speaker 1: to do all the things that matter to you, really 607 00:29:01,200 --> 00:29:03,360 Speaker 1: and truly. But in order to do that, you have 608 00:29:03,440 --> 00:29:05,440 Speaker 1: to get clear. And I think if I could go 609 00:29:05,520 --> 00:29:09,040 Speaker 1: back and tell myself that and also tell myself to 610 00:29:09,120 --> 00:29:13,160 Speaker 1: be brave in pursuing those things, to believe that and 611 00:29:13,320 --> 00:29:16,959 Speaker 1: know that the resources, the kind of creative solutions, all 612 00:29:16,960 --> 00:29:19,960 Speaker 1: those things would present themselves. If I just kept going 613 00:29:20,080 --> 00:29:22,680 Speaker 1: and stayed committed to that vision, it would be possible. 614 00:29:22,920 --> 00:29:26,440 Speaker 1: I think sometimes we take the exit ramp too easily, 615 00:29:26,440 --> 00:29:28,640 Speaker 1: and we give up on our dreams for our life. 616 00:29:28,680 --> 00:29:32,800 Speaker 1: And it's sad. That is perfect. There is great advice, 617 00:29:32,880 --> 00:29:36,680 Speaker 1: and I'm sure our listeners will take it to heart. Okay, 618 00:29:36,720 --> 00:29:38,280 Speaker 1: are you ready for your love of the week? I 619 00:29:38,320 --> 00:29:42,600 Speaker 1: am ready, awesome, Okay, I'll go first, just to give 620 00:29:42,600 --> 00:29:46,560 Speaker 1: you another minute. Okay, mine would be the Kids America's 621 00:29:46,600 --> 00:29:50,760 Speaker 1: Test Kitchen Cookbook, because my almost nine year old is 622 00:29:50,760 --> 00:29:53,800 Speaker 1: now getting into cooking and the recipes in there are 623 00:29:53,840 --> 00:29:55,840 Speaker 1: just they're written in a nice simple way, but they're 624 00:29:55,840 --> 00:29:58,560 Speaker 1: America's Test Kitchen, so they're like really really love it, 625 00:29:59,200 --> 00:30:03,080 Speaker 1: and we made I'm like legit brownies the other day 626 00:30:03,120 --> 00:30:05,360 Speaker 1: that I am still enjoying. So if you have kids 627 00:30:05,400 --> 00:30:08,760 Speaker 1: interested in cooking, the America's Test Kitchen Kids Cookbook, I'm 628 00:30:08,880 --> 00:30:10,520 Speaker 1: ordering that. I don't know about the rest of you guys, 629 00:30:10,520 --> 00:30:14,720 Speaker 1: but I'm ordering that. That sounds so fun. Okay for me? 630 00:30:15,200 --> 00:30:19,440 Speaker 1: It would be the Stanley Tumbler Cup. So this is 631 00:30:19,480 --> 00:30:22,520 Speaker 1: something from an Instagram account that I love called the 632 00:30:22,600 --> 00:30:25,400 Speaker 1: Bye Guide Be You Why Guide, and if you just 633 00:30:25,400 --> 00:30:27,560 Speaker 1: look them up at the by Guide you can find it. 634 00:30:27,800 --> 00:30:32,440 Speaker 1: But it is basically this sixty four ounce cup. I 635 00:30:32,480 --> 00:30:35,360 Speaker 1: think that's right. It's a big cup with a handle, 636 00:30:35,720 --> 00:30:37,320 Speaker 1: and I'm looking over at it on my desk and 637 00:30:37,360 --> 00:30:41,800 Speaker 1: a straw and it's insulated and it's stainless steal. I 638 00:30:41,920 --> 00:30:45,800 Speaker 1: have been more consistent at drinking water in doing this 639 00:30:46,280 --> 00:30:48,680 Speaker 1: since I started using this probably a year and a 640 00:30:48,720 --> 00:30:51,360 Speaker 1: half ago, maybe two years ago. It's like a game 641 00:30:51,480 --> 00:30:53,200 Speaker 1: changer to me. I know this sounds hilarious, like it's 642 00:30:53,200 --> 00:30:55,280 Speaker 1: a cup but it fits in your car cup holder. 643 00:30:56,040 --> 00:30:58,400 Speaker 1: Like I don't leave home without it. I take it everywhere. 644 00:30:58,440 --> 00:31:00,880 Speaker 1: My team thinks it's funny because like they never see 645 00:31:00,880 --> 00:31:03,480 Speaker 1: me without it, and I am just obsessed. I like 646 00:31:03,560 --> 00:31:05,320 Speaker 1: ice and I like a straw. And that's one of 647 00:31:05,360 --> 00:31:07,640 Speaker 1: the things that didn't work for me about those big 648 00:31:07,680 --> 00:31:09,440 Speaker 1: water bottles where like you use it, and you know 649 00:31:09,480 --> 00:31:10,920 Speaker 1: you do with water all down in the front of 650 00:31:10,920 --> 00:31:13,560 Speaker 1: your shirt. Anyway, this is a game changer if you're 651 00:31:13,600 --> 00:31:17,800 Speaker 1: serious about hydration, which also helps your brain. So just ps, 652 00:31:18,360 --> 00:31:20,480 Speaker 1: I love it. I will link it up. Yeah, So 653 00:31:20,560 --> 00:31:23,080 Speaker 1: reminder listeners where they can find you and tell them 654 00:31:23,080 --> 00:31:24,800 Speaker 1: the name of your book one more time. I am 655 00:31:24,840 --> 00:31:27,560 Speaker 1: definitely going to check it out myself. Awesome, thank you. 656 00:31:27,640 --> 00:31:30,440 Speaker 1: It's called when It Work and Succeed at Life. And 657 00:31:30,520 --> 00:31:32,600 Speaker 1: the best way to find out about the book is 658 00:31:32,760 --> 00:31:37,760 Speaker 1: win in Succeed book dot com slash leadership. So when 659 00:31:37,840 --> 00:31:41,080 Speaker 1: in Succeed book dot com slash leadership. What's great about 660 00:31:41,080 --> 00:31:44,760 Speaker 1: that is if you pre order the book before April twentieth, 661 00:31:44,920 --> 00:31:47,720 Speaker 1: among many other things, you get a free ticket worth 662 00:31:47,960 --> 00:31:51,240 Speaker 1: about five hundred dollars to our virtual live book launch 663 00:31:51,280 --> 00:31:53,160 Speaker 1: event where my dad and I are going to be 664 00:31:53,200 --> 00:31:56,000 Speaker 1: interviewed kind of the most intimate interview that we've ever done. 665 00:31:56,480 --> 00:31:57,800 Speaker 1: We don't even know what the questions are. It's going 666 00:31:57,840 --> 00:31:59,760 Speaker 1: to be really exciting, kind of all about our double 667 00:31:59,800 --> 00:32:02,720 Speaker 1: win story, our journeys to get here, mistakes, et cetera. 668 00:32:03,000 --> 00:32:04,680 Speaker 1: And then we're going to have some great interviews with 669 00:32:04,760 --> 00:32:07,360 Speaker 1: other guests. It's going to be a really really neat 670 00:32:07,440 --> 00:32:11,240 Speaker 1: event helping to make people, just like your listeners, kind 671 00:32:11,280 --> 00:32:13,880 Speaker 1: of understand how this could become real for them. You know, 672 00:32:13,960 --> 00:32:16,680 Speaker 1: what's the path to winning at work and succeed and 673 00:32:16,720 --> 00:32:19,560 Speaker 1: it like look like for you so again, win and 674 00:32:19,640 --> 00:32:23,360 Speaker 1: succeed book dot com slash leadership. Awesome, we will link 675 00:32:23,400 --> 00:32:25,520 Speaker 1: that up as well. That sounds like a really great 676 00:32:25,520 --> 00:32:28,640 Speaker 1: and fun opportunity. Yeah, thank you so much for coming on, 677 00:32:28,720 --> 00:32:31,000 Speaker 1: Megan Hyatt Miller. It has been a pleasure. I have 678 00:32:31,200 --> 00:32:34,400 Speaker 1: so enjoyed following your journey. Ah, me too, Thanks Sarah, 679 00:32:34,400 --> 00:32:36,440 Speaker 1: thank you for having me, and thank you guys for listening. 680 00:32:36,440 --> 00:32:39,520 Speaker 1: It's been enjoy to be with y'all. All right, So 681 00:32:39,800 --> 00:32:44,000 Speaker 1: that was great, Thanks Sarah for that interview. Today's question 682 00:32:44,200 --> 00:32:46,920 Speaker 1: comes from a listener who says, I recently discovered your 683 00:32:46,920 --> 00:32:51,000 Speaker 1: podcast when trying to find content about returning to work 684 00:32:51,080 --> 00:32:53,480 Speaker 1: after having been a stay at home mom. Really enjoyed 685 00:32:53,480 --> 00:32:56,000 Speaker 1: listening to you guys. It's helping me mentally prepare for 686 00:32:56,000 --> 00:32:58,600 Speaker 1: this big transition in my life. This person works in 687 00:32:58,640 --> 00:33:01,640 Speaker 1: the design industry and stopped working full time after having 688 00:33:01,680 --> 00:33:04,360 Speaker 1: her first son in twenty thirteen. She had done part 689 00:33:04,400 --> 00:33:08,280 Speaker 1: time consulting on and off as needed until twenty twenty, 690 00:33:08,800 --> 00:33:12,120 Speaker 1: when you know, things went crazy. She said they had 691 00:33:12,120 --> 00:33:14,360 Speaker 1: decided to stay that she would stay home because her 692 00:33:14,440 --> 00:33:17,480 Speaker 1: husband husband's job has strange hours and lots of travel, 693 00:33:17,880 --> 00:33:20,600 Speaker 1: but she is definitely ready to go back to work 694 00:33:20,640 --> 00:33:24,880 Speaker 1: after seven years. They have been reevaluating his career, hoping 695 00:33:24,920 --> 00:33:26,880 Speaker 1: to have him make a change where his hours will 696 00:33:26,880 --> 00:33:29,760 Speaker 1: be more regular, no travel. But she says, would be 697 00:33:29,840 --> 00:33:32,080 Speaker 1: curious if you have any content on best of both 698 00:33:32,120 --> 00:33:36,200 Speaker 1: worlds for returning full time to the workforce. Would love 699 00:33:36,240 --> 00:33:40,200 Speaker 1: any insight and tricks. So Sarah, I mean, what do 700 00:33:40,240 --> 00:33:43,800 Speaker 1: you got? Yeah, well, I just the word content actually 701 00:33:43,840 --> 00:33:47,680 Speaker 1: spurred me to think about mindful return With Laurie Mikolk, 702 00:33:47,720 --> 00:33:50,480 Speaker 1: I believe I think she mostly focuses on like after 703 00:33:50,920 --> 00:33:53,320 Speaker 1: maternity leave, but you know, she may have some resources 704 00:33:53,320 --> 00:33:56,400 Speaker 1: for those who have longer gats. Certainly the name of 705 00:33:56,440 --> 00:33:59,320 Speaker 1: her her company would make me meet thinks. So I 706 00:33:59,360 --> 00:34:02,080 Speaker 1: think the one thing you seriously have going for you 707 00:34:02,320 --> 00:34:04,840 Speaker 1: is that you have dabbled in the consulting the whole time. 708 00:34:04,960 --> 00:34:07,880 Speaker 1: So really, you know, even if it was minor, you 709 00:34:07,920 --> 00:34:10,080 Speaker 1: are still on the pulse. You still have contacts, You 710 00:34:10,120 --> 00:34:12,280 Speaker 1: still kind of know how to like do the thing 711 00:34:12,360 --> 00:34:15,360 Speaker 1: that you are good at doing, which is like design projects. 712 00:34:15,360 --> 00:34:17,520 Speaker 1: And so now it's just a matter. I wouldn't even 713 00:34:17,560 --> 00:34:19,480 Speaker 1: think of it as like something totally new, but more 714 00:34:19,520 --> 00:34:22,880 Speaker 1: like scaling back up to a more structured, maybe employed 715 00:34:22,880 --> 00:34:26,279 Speaker 1: opportunity rather than doing things freelance, if that's you know, 716 00:34:26,320 --> 00:34:29,760 Speaker 1: what you want to do. So I think you already 717 00:34:29,760 --> 00:34:32,200 Speaker 1: have like a huge leg up in terms of that, 718 00:34:32,320 --> 00:34:34,040 Speaker 1: And I would start by just going through all the 719 00:34:34,040 --> 00:34:35,920 Speaker 1: contacts you've been working maybe over the past two or 720 00:34:35,960 --> 00:34:38,520 Speaker 1: three years, and just letting them know that you are 721 00:34:38,520 --> 00:34:40,359 Speaker 1: ready and who do they know and what's out there 722 00:34:40,400 --> 00:34:42,480 Speaker 1: and this sort of post COVID time might be a 723 00:34:42,520 --> 00:34:46,600 Speaker 1: great time as industries are kind of you know, recovering 724 00:34:46,680 --> 00:34:49,400 Speaker 1: our and are and maybe looking for, you know, more 725 00:34:49,480 --> 00:34:52,319 Speaker 1: effective ways to reach others and advertise and do all 726 00:34:52,320 --> 00:34:54,319 Speaker 1: that kind of stuff that designers have to help with. 727 00:34:54,840 --> 00:34:58,760 Speaker 1: I would also say, and after you you give your thoughts, 728 00:34:58,760 --> 00:35:01,279 Speaker 1: but if we have a yes that a person that 729 00:35:01,360 --> 00:35:04,359 Speaker 1: is listening to this thinking, hey, I went back after 730 00:35:04,560 --> 00:35:07,480 Speaker 1: eight years, and you know, with whatever profession that you 731 00:35:07,680 --> 00:35:11,000 Speaker 1: are in, whether that's a freelance designer or a lawyer 732 00:35:11,120 --> 00:35:14,680 Speaker 1: or anything, I would be we'd be fascinated. That does 733 00:35:14,680 --> 00:35:18,200 Speaker 1: seem like it's a gap we haven't really addressed, at 734 00:35:18,280 --> 00:35:21,480 Speaker 1: least not recently. So please feel free to let us 735 00:35:21,520 --> 00:35:23,000 Speaker 1: know if that is you and one would like to 736 00:35:23,000 --> 00:35:25,880 Speaker 1: tell your story. Yeah, no, it's a great question. And 737 00:35:26,640 --> 00:35:28,680 Speaker 1: first of all, yes, the fact that you did this 738 00:35:28,800 --> 00:35:33,319 Speaker 1: with the part time consulting still there is such a 739 00:35:33,400 --> 00:35:36,799 Speaker 1: huge difference from not having done that. I mean, some 740 00:35:36,840 --> 00:35:39,000 Speaker 1: people when they elect to stay home with the kids, 741 00:35:39,040 --> 00:35:41,680 Speaker 1: they've sort of retired in the sense that they aren't 742 00:35:41,800 --> 00:35:44,520 Speaker 1: keeping up with the industry, and that is totally cool, 743 00:35:44,800 --> 00:35:46,600 Speaker 1: but it's going to be a lot harder to get 744 00:35:46,640 --> 00:35:48,040 Speaker 1: back in if you want to. Now maybe you don't 745 00:35:48,040 --> 00:35:49,880 Speaker 1: want to, you are in fact retired and that is 746 00:35:49,920 --> 00:35:51,719 Speaker 1: great as well. There's many other things one can do 747 00:35:51,800 --> 00:35:54,520 Speaker 1: with one's time. But if you are thinking that you 748 00:35:54,600 --> 00:35:56,960 Speaker 1: may have any chance of wanting to go back in 749 00:35:57,040 --> 00:36:00,640 Speaker 1: professionally at some point, keeping at least a little bit 750 00:36:00,880 --> 00:36:04,000 Speaker 1: of that going is going to make such a huge 751 00:36:04,040 --> 00:36:07,239 Speaker 1: difference when you do decide to scale it back up, 752 00:36:07,320 --> 00:36:09,760 Speaker 1: because then you are not starting from zero, as Sarah 753 00:36:09,800 --> 00:36:12,520 Speaker 1: was saying. You still have your contacts, you still have 754 00:36:12,800 --> 00:36:15,120 Speaker 1: a resume of experience, you have things you can point 755 00:36:15,120 --> 00:36:17,799 Speaker 1: to that you have done. Maybe you've even been going 756 00:36:17,800 --> 00:36:21,480 Speaker 1: to conferences or taking classes or something. And if you are, 757 00:36:21,640 --> 00:36:24,560 Speaker 1: you know, if we have listeners who are taking some 758 00:36:24,600 --> 00:36:26,520 Speaker 1: time out of the workforce, you might want to think 759 00:36:26,520 --> 00:36:29,399 Speaker 1: about how you could build in I don't know, five 760 00:36:29,440 --> 00:36:31,640 Speaker 1: hours a week for that sort of thing. It doesn't 761 00:36:31,680 --> 00:36:34,640 Speaker 1: have to be a lot, but the difference between nothing 762 00:36:34,719 --> 00:36:39,120 Speaker 1: and something is just huge for future you trying to 763 00:36:39,200 --> 00:36:42,080 Speaker 1: make a professional change again, So figure about how you 764 00:36:42,160 --> 00:36:45,960 Speaker 1: might put that five hours into your life to make 765 00:36:46,000 --> 00:36:48,799 Speaker 1: that work. The other thing is just to you know, 766 00:36:49,000 --> 00:36:51,000 Speaker 1: I'm sure you will wind up with a wonderful job 767 00:36:51,120 --> 00:36:55,000 Speaker 1: because of your experience, your part time consulting experience. Things 768 00:36:55,040 --> 00:36:58,200 Speaker 1: you might want to look for is if there are 769 00:36:59,000 --> 00:37:02,000 Speaker 1: perhaps other parents who are returned to the workforce at 770 00:37:02,040 --> 00:37:06,799 Speaker 1: your company, if there are other people who acknowledge that 771 00:37:06,800 --> 00:37:09,120 Speaker 1: they have lives outside of work, Like when you're going 772 00:37:09,160 --> 00:37:11,799 Speaker 1: through the interview process, if people are talking about like 773 00:37:12,320 --> 00:37:14,799 Speaker 1: you know, oh yeah, like I love this job, and 774 00:37:14,880 --> 00:37:16,640 Speaker 1: you know, oh yeah, they see that picture over there, 775 00:37:16,719 --> 00:37:22,200 Speaker 1: that's my bowling league that I bowl with every Thursday night. Like, 776 00:37:22,280 --> 00:37:24,960 Speaker 1: you know, things like that are good signs because it 777 00:37:24,960 --> 00:37:27,480 Speaker 1: means that they're able to, like say every Thursday night, 778 00:37:27,520 --> 00:37:29,600 Speaker 1: like I'm not doing anything, I cannot work late, I 779 00:37:29,600 --> 00:37:32,480 Speaker 1: have a commitment, you know it. Just there are little 780 00:37:32,520 --> 00:37:35,960 Speaker 1: signs like that that a company is more reasonable as 781 00:37:35,960 --> 00:37:37,640 Speaker 1: a place to work. Now, obviously you don't have to 782 00:37:37,640 --> 00:37:39,080 Speaker 1: have that, Like if you want to work in one 783 00:37:39,080 --> 00:37:42,560 Speaker 1: of those places, that's all in one hundred percent great, 784 00:37:42,880 --> 00:37:45,640 Speaker 1: Like this could be a fun transition for your family 785 00:37:45,640 --> 00:37:47,440 Speaker 1: where maybe your husband could take on more of the 786 00:37:47,440 --> 00:37:49,279 Speaker 1: stuff that you have been doing and you lean in 787 00:37:49,320 --> 00:37:52,160 Speaker 1: a little bit more to your line of work. But 788 00:37:52,600 --> 00:37:54,520 Speaker 1: if you are looking for something that has a bit 789 00:37:54,560 --> 00:37:56,719 Speaker 1: of the flexibility that that those are the kinds of 790 00:37:56,760 --> 00:38:00,840 Speaker 1: things you can look out for. But yeah, I second 791 00:38:00,840 --> 00:38:03,040 Speaker 1: with Sarah. We'd love to have a guest or two 792 00:38:03,080 --> 00:38:06,399 Speaker 1: who have taken decade out of the workforce and have 793 00:38:06,480 --> 00:38:08,680 Speaker 1: come back in and hear your advice on what made 794 00:38:08,719 --> 00:38:12,319 Speaker 1: it work and things that other listeners should keep in mind. Well, 795 00:38:12,360 --> 00:38:15,560 Speaker 1: this has been best of both worlds. Sarah interviewed Megan 796 00:38:15,680 --> 00:38:18,239 Speaker 1: Hyatt Miller and we will be back next week with 797 00:38:18,320 --> 00:38:22,680 Speaker 1: more on making work and life fit together. Thanks for listening. 798 00:38:22,920 --> 00:38:26,000 Speaker 1: You can find me Sarah at the shoebox dot com 799 00:38:26,160 --> 00:38:29,920 Speaker 1: or at the Underscore Shoebox on Instagram, and you can 800 00:38:29,960 --> 00:38:34,200 Speaker 1: find me Laura at Laura vandercam dot com. This has 801 00:38:34,239 --> 00:38:37,560 Speaker 1: been the best of both worlds podcasts. Please join us 802 00:38:37,560 --> 00:38:40,960 Speaker 1: next time for more on making work and life work together.