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Speaker 1: Hi, everyone, It's Sophia. Welcome to work in Progress. Welcome

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Speaker 1: back to work in progress. Whip smarties. Today we are

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Speaker 1: joined by one of my favorite women in my life.

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Speaker 1: I was a fan of hers before we became friends.

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Speaker 1: We became friends, and she's every bit as cool as

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Speaker 1: I'd ever hoped she would be and more, and she

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Speaker 1: just happens to be, like I don't know, a genre

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Speaker 1: redefining genius who is changing comedy, storytelling, digital media, and

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Speaker 1: transforming personal experiences for the better. She has a humor

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Speaker 1: that resonates across cultures and happens to be one of

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Speaker 1: the most talented, audacious, and hardworking people that I know. Today,

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Speaker 1: we are joined by the inimitable Lily Singh. Lily is

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Speaker 1: here to talk about her new film Doing It, which

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Speaker 1: hits theaters next week. And the movie really exemplifies her

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Speaker 1: mission for using her platform for global impact while amplifying

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Speaker 1: underrepresented voices and somehow doing all of it with humor.

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Speaker 1: She's dismantling shame, she's challenging cultural taboos, she's empowering women

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Speaker 1: to reclaim their stories, and she is making us laugh

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Speaker 1: really fricking hard while she does it. Let's dive in

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Speaker 1: with Lily sing.

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Speaker 2: Hi, Hi, Hi, Savia, welcome. I'm so excited.

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Speaker 1: This is also so funny. I like, I got my

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Speaker 1: you know, I always have all my nerdy prep stuff,

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Speaker 1: and I was like, weird to have prep documents to

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Speaker 1: sit with my homide correct, I know, But also that

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Speaker 1: I was like, no, this is probably good because it'll

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Speaker 1: remind me that we're working.

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Speaker 2: Yes, but also like how lovely for me that I

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Speaker 2: have to like do this work.

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Speaker 3: Then I'm like, I'm just gonna go talk to Saviia,

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Speaker 3: Yeah for an hour's I'm so happy to be here.

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Speaker 3: I am in my era of connection, girllypop. I am

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Speaker 3: just here. I'm doing like a little bit of a

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Speaker 3: press store for my movie. But I'm committed to enjoying

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Speaker 3: every single second of it. And so my number one

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Speaker 3: thing is just have good conversations and genuinely connect with

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Speaker 3: people and like actually be present.

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Speaker 2: And that's what I'm doing.

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Speaker 1: I feel like that was the beginning of a journey

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Speaker 1: you were starting when we went to Pace and had

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Speaker 1: our like.

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Speaker 3: Essential that's actually well remembered, right, That's exactly correct. So

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Speaker 3: I told you that during that dinner that I go

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Speaker 3: to a dinner every Thursday.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, in my whole.

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Speaker 3: Thing is like connecting with people because I feel like

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Speaker 3: we're in this industry. Even if you're not in this industry,

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Speaker 3: I feel like we're really losing the art of connection.

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Speaker 3: I feel like we're just acquaintances with people. We have

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Speaker 3: a lot of small talk, we never get deep into.

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Speaker 3: We don't know things about other people. Yeah, and I

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Speaker 3: was like, I'm gonna take so Fie out for dinner

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Speaker 3: and I just want like know things about her and

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Speaker 3: be friends real friends.

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Speaker 1: Well, and I think when you have the experience we've

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Speaker 1: always had together, which is like, oh, you're my people,

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Speaker 1: and then all we do is text and it's like

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Speaker 1: I'm in Toronto, I'm in New York, in LA, I'm

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Speaker 1: in New Mexico, and I'm like, god.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, when are we ever going to event with like

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Speaker 2: two hundred people?

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Speaker 3: And then you just say you're high and by and

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Speaker 3: you don't really like actually connect. So I'm just really

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Speaker 3: my number one.

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Speaker 2: Priority in life is connected with people, regardless of what

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Speaker 2: I'm doing. So that's why I'm here here. I'm fully

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Speaker 2: present with you.

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Speaker 1: We're We're in it, baby, Okay, question for you answer free,

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Speaker 1: especially because I feel like you have been such a

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Speaker 1: public fixture figure, not even as characters, but you your identity,

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Speaker 1: what you're passionate about, your writing, you're creating, you know,

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Speaker 1: your early YouTube career, all of it. Everybody knows or

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Speaker 1: thinks at least maybe that's super parasocial and I should

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Speaker 1: know better, But everyone thinks they know a lot about you,

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Speaker 1: for like the woman you are, the business woman cash.

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Speaker 1: What about if we went back and like we got

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Speaker 1: to bend space time a little bit for the nerds,

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Speaker 1: and we got to walk onto a playground and like

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Speaker 1: our eight or nine year old selves were playing. Would

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Speaker 1: you be able to sit down with your nine year

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Speaker 1: old self and do you think you would see yourself

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Speaker 1: in her?

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Speaker 2: Yes?

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Speaker 3: Absolutely so, I do think that To answer the first

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Speaker 3: part of the question, I think people have a pretty

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Speaker 3: good grasp before I am. The good news about me is, yeah,

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Speaker 3: I'm very grateful that my career started with me being me.

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Speaker 2: I did not start my career acting as a character.

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Speaker 3: I was myself in my YouTube videos, and I was

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Speaker 3: myself for like a decade plus, and so sometimes when

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Speaker 3: I'm hanging with my other actor friends, they're like, oh,

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Speaker 3: I'm so comfortable on set with lines but the second

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Speaker 3: I do an interview, I don't know how to answer.

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Speaker 2: I'm the opposite. I'm so used to being myself all

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Speaker 2: the time.

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Speaker 3: And so I feel really comfortable opening up, and I

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Speaker 3: have very little filter, and I'm very honest and run

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Speaker 3: pretty quickly honestly, So I think people have a pretty

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Speaker 3: good grasp before I am. Obviously there's some parts of

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Speaker 3: my life I keep private, but I think what you

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Speaker 3: see is what you get with me for the most

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Speaker 3: part when you see me on screen.

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Speaker 2: Going back to the playground question.

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Speaker 3: I think I would see a lot of myself in

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Speaker 3: that young girl, mostly because, and I'm speaking of going

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Speaker 3: into some stuff, I do a lot.

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Speaker 2: Of inner child work.

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Speaker 3: So I talked to that nine year old version of

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Speaker 3: Lily all the time, all the time. Truly, there's a

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Speaker 3: lot of differences between me and her, but there's a

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Speaker 3: lot of similarities, and we talk a lot, and we're

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Speaker 3: in constant communication, and so I would say that I'm

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Speaker 3: talking to her and ask myself this question every day.

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Speaker 1: What do you think, because you do that work you

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Speaker 1: see in her, Like, what would some of the takeaways

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Speaker 1: be of that sort of inner child work you're talking about?

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Speaker 3: So I think This is funny you're asking me this

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Speaker 3: because I've been like deep in it for the past

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Speaker 3: couple months.

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Speaker 2: I mean, Sophia is my friend.

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Speaker 3: You know.

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Speaker 2: I've been through some.

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Speaker 3: Some thangs over the past little bit here, and I've

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Speaker 3: been really in therapy, journaling, just really trying to master myself,

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Speaker 3: master my mind, and grow a lot. And so I

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Speaker 3: think for most of my life, and I'll speak about

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Speaker 3: this in a way where I feel like everybody has

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Speaker 3: a moment in their life when they're a child where

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Speaker 3: they have a vivid memory of, like that's where the

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Speaker 3: abandonment issue happened, or like that's where the trauma started.

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Speaker 2: Exactly right there's right there.

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Speaker 3: We all this visual of like us as a kid

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Speaker 3: in a space and time where we're like and that's

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Speaker 3: where that like hurt happened, and maybe we didn't know

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Speaker 3: what maybe we know it now, whatever it is. And

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Speaker 3: so I have very vivid memories of like exactly the

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Speaker 3: room I was in where I was when that little girl,

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Speaker 3: like her abandonment issue started, and where some of her

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Speaker 3: trauma started. And for most of my life, it's been

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Speaker 3: so painful to look at that little girl and look

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Speaker 3: at that moment because I.

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Speaker 2: I didn't give her grace. I was like, you are

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Speaker 2: so hurt.

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Speaker 3: And because you're hurt, now I'm an adult who has

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Speaker 3: abandonment issues and I have to go to therapy, and

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Speaker 3: I'm like this way in a relationship, and I'm like

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Speaker 3: this way in friendships is because of you and because

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Speaker 3: of this hurt. And over the past couple of months,

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Speaker 3: I have really switched that narrative to be like, actually,

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Speaker 3: I have everything I have because of that little girl.

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Speaker 3: Because that little girl went through some stuff, was able

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Speaker 3: to be super resilient, was able to learn and grow

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Speaker 3: and just never give up.

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Speaker 2: Is the reason I am the way I am.

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Speaker 3: So I've completely flipped the narrative to be like, thank you,

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Speaker 3: little girl, like thank you for being so strong, and

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Speaker 3: now I'm gonna protect you and take care of you.

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Speaker 3: And now when I have that, this is like, look

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Speaker 3: it's been five minutes. We're already in deep trauma where

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Speaker 3: this is why I am.

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Speaker 1: By the way, this is also why you and I

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Speaker 1: bond because like we're not the people at the two

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Speaker 1: hundred person event saying hellos, I'm always in the corner

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Speaker 1: having a deep talk with someone and then like my

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Speaker 1: agent yells at me and says, I didn't do my job,

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Speaker 1: and I'm like, yeah, I didn't go meet eighteen producers

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Speaker 1: because I was learning about someone's in a better job.

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Speaker 2: You were a human beings. So here we are. Ye,

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Speaker 2: well say I got tips?

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Speaker 3: Yes, well all this to say, and I'm going to

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Speaker 3: really reveal some nerdy things about me because I am

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Speaker 3: a big believer of virtuals. I do this thing where

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Speaker 3: before an audition, before a chemistry read, before anything I do,

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Speaker 3: I always take a moment for the inner child. And

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Speaker 3: I have a song that I played that I dance

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Speaker 3: with her in. That's how nerdy I am. I actually

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Speaker 3: go back to that room in that moment and I

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Speaker 3: dance with that little girl and I protect her. Now,

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Speaker 3: I love that's my inner child work.

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Speaker 1: That's a really beautiful thing that's practicable, if you will.

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Speaker 2: My brain is quite pragmatic, actually.

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Speaker 3: I My therapist is always like, let me guess you

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Speaker 3: want a list and you want instructions, And I'm like, absolutely,

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Speaker 3: I would absolutely love a task and instructions.

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Speaker 1: Okay, question for you, do you think I'm going to

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Speaker 1: be vulnerable here?

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Speaker 3: Tell me?

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Speaker 1: Do you think that's because as children who went through trauma,

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Speaker 1: who then become this sort of classic classic eldest daughter

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Speaker 1: syndrome or only daughter syndrome, or a successful daughter syndrome.

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Speaker 1: In a way, your your emotions can be so big,

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Speaker 1: your sensitivity is so big, your empathy can be crippling

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Speaker 1: that then you go, oh, if I'm going to get

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Speaker 1: a handle on this, I gotta get real pragmatic.

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Speaker 3: Yes, it's the too long to read is control freak.

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Speaker 3: That's another way to say it. I'm a massive control.

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Speaker 1: Freaking and the negative energy.

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Speaker 2: I fully own my control freaking. I love it. I

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Speaker 2: love a list.

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Speaker 3: I love a practical task to the best of my ability.

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Speaker 3: If I'm working on anything that is spiritual mental, I

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Speaker 3: try my best to come up with a pragmatic exercise

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Speaker 3: that goes it's.

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Speaker 2: Not always possible.

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Speaker 3: I really like that it's not always possible, but I

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Speaker 3: have found a lot that really do work.

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Speaker 1: Something I really admire about you too, though, is you

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Speaker 1: figure it out and then you do it Like I'm

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Speaker 1: the person who will get It's like a classic ADHD thing.

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Speaker 1: It's oh, is it new journal season? Which is all

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Speaker 1: the time. It's like, oh, this workbook is going to

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Speaker 1: be the one that I'm going to stick with and

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Speaker 1: then it's going to change my life. And I'm definitely

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Speaker 1: in a moment where I'm like, no, I have to

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Speaker 1: change my life no matter what journal. I'm yeah, otherwise

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Speaker 1: it's really.

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Speaker 2: And I feel for you. I feel I do.

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Speaker 3: I do come up with the stuff, and I do

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Speaker 3: do it. But I have the opposite problem, whereas you

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Speaker 3: might be like, oh, the journal's going, I'm so rigid.

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Speaker 3: This journal is the only journal I use, and I

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Speaker 3: cannot be flexible at all. I have to own so

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Speaker 3: I'm rigid and I'm learning more flexibility, honest, Okay.

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Speaker 1: Do you think in that way? Like you just wrote

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Speaker 1: us a bit, you are a great writer, whether it's

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Speaker 1: a joke or whether it's something comedic, or whether it's

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Speaker 1: something serious. Like you, you have always seemed since I've

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Speaker 1: known you, and before we knew each other personally, but

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Speaker 1: I knew your work, you've always seemed like a person

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Speaker 1: who harnesses story for humor and for good. Where do

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Speaker 1: you think that came from?

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Speaker 3: That?

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Speaker 1: Was that a way to help kind of parent your

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Speaker 1: inner child before you knew that's what you were doing.

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Speaker 3: I mean, I probably wouldn't have said it so eloquently

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Speaker 3: because you said it absolutely that is what it is,

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Speaker 3: you know.

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Speaker 2: It's a few things.

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Speaker 3: You know, I growing up loved TV, and I loved movies,

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Speaker 3: and I grew up in the era of like movie

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Speaker 3: stars and TV stars, you know, And so I feel

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Speaker 3: like I learned so much about myself and how to

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Speaker 3: treat myself and how to treat other people through through

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Speaker 3: me and movies. Yeah, I'll give you an example. Like,

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Speaker 3: I mean this not as a joke, very sincerely. I

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Speaker 3: was raised by the Simpsons. A lot of my humor

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Speaker 3: comes from the Simpsons. One of the most common comments

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Speaker 3: I get under my YouTube videos is you have the mannerisms,

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Speaker 3: comedic timing, and facial expressions of Will Smith because I

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Speaker 3: was raised with fresh Prints, so I have emulated these.

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Speaker 2: People that I grew up watching.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, and it's how I understood myself and the people

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Speaker 3: around me. And so I know that TV shows and

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Speaker 3: movies are just entertaining, but there's.

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Speaker 2: So much more than that.

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Speaker 3: They actually really do impact our worldview. And I remember

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Speaker 3: vividly the first time I watched Pitch Perfect. It's Anna Kendrick.

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Speaker 3: She makes a joke about just like her family trauma,

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Speaker 3: and I remember being in a theater watching that, being

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Speaker 3: like you can do that. You can have trauma and

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Speaker 3: just make a joke about it and like laugh. And

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Speaker 3: that was actually the thing that started me using comedy

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Speaker 3: as like a vehicle to deal with some of my trauma.

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Speaker 3: And so I've just I've learned so much through story

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Speaker 3: ries and I really really believe that if you see

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Speaker 3: a character go through something, you can learn about yourself,

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Speaker 3: you can feel inspired, you can have something to aspire to.

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Speaker 3: I feel like we don't talk about storytelling as being

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Speaker 3: like the intervention enough. I really do feel it's the medicine.

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Speaker 3: I totally And when you you know, because I really

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Speaker 3: care about and I know you do too, gender and

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Speaker 3: gender equity, and you talk about all this stuff like

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Speaker 3: the patriarchy is just a story. All these things of

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Speaker 3: how we treat people is just a story. Yes, And

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Speaker 3: so if there's stories that exist, those stories can be

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Speaker 3: changed and better stories can be told.

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Speaker 1: Everything is a story.

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Speaker 2: It's made up.

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Speaker 4: Everything is made up, and it's like everything, what are

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Speaker 4: we What are we doing adhering to these stories instead

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Speaker 4: of using the thing we see and know to be real,

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Speaker 4: which is we learn, we grow, we do better.

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Speaker 1: There are people out here that are like I could

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Speaker 1: grow and do better. But I gotta adhere to.

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Speaker 2: This story exactly.

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Speaker 1: But that story is making you person.

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Speaker 2: New story why?

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Speaker 3: Absolutely so, I really do believe in the power of stories,

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Speaker 3: and I first and foremost call myself a storyteller for

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Speaker 3: that reason.

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Speaker 1: I love it.

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Speaker 2: I do too.

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Speaker 1: Yes, when people ask what I do, it's actor is

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Speaker 1: a is a a title I find a lot of

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Speaker 1: passion for. But it also feels reductive to the full

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Speaker 1: scope of what we do because I'm acting when the

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Speaker 1: cameras rolling, but I am working on the story from

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Speaker 1: sun up to sundown and in every moment on set

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Speaker 1: in between.

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Speaker 2: Totally and I like that, yeah, absolutely, And I one

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Speaker 2: part I love about acting is you need to learn

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Speaker 2: so much about yourself.

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Speaker 3: I feel like every part of it is beautiful. The

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Speaker 3: actor gets to learn abo them selves, the viewers get

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Speaker 3: to learn about themselves. Totally a beautiful experience, mutually beneficial.

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Speaker 1: Well, and there's something really interesting. I've been thinking about

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Speaker 1: this a lot lately, especially because like everything's in the phone,

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Speaker 1: everything's flat, everything's a headline, everything is a clickbait something.

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Speaker 1: Everything is designed to enrage you or scare you or whatever.

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Speaker 1: And I've tried to think about why this is so

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Speaker 1: bad for us. But to your point, because we grew

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Speaker 1: up at that same time, watching those great shows like

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Speaker 1: being Raised by TV in the eighties and nineties was

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Speaker 1: cool because we were learning about people and people were

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Speaker 1: allowed to be human. It wasn't you're perfect on a

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Speaker 1: pedestal until we ruin you in the tabloids or the

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Speaker 1: press or the paper. It was every week, you're going

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Speaker 1: to sit down and watch someone try and fail and

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Speaker 1: sometimes succeed, and you'll love them through all of it.

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Speaker 1: And maybe you'll learn how to fail with grace, and

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Speaker 1: maybe you'll learn how to succeed with humility, and maybe

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Speaker 1: you'll learn how to be a good coworker or a

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Speaker 1: better daughter or whatever. And I realize we don't actually

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Speaker 1: get to watch people grow a lot. We don't get

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Speaker 1: to watch people get knocked down and get back up

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Speaker 1: in really in depth ways. And that's why I think

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Speaker 1: film and television are so powerful totally, because you get

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Speaker 1: to see the stuff people often hide from the outside world,

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Speaker 1: and then you get to practice grace and patience.

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Speaker 2: Right, that's a really good point.

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Speaker 3: I feel like it's far and few in between when

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Speaker 3: we get to see that journey online these days.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, if you guys want to see people fail, you

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Speaker 2: should follow me. Let me just let.

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Speaker 3: I'm very open about all my failures and imperfections. But yeah,

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Speaker 3: I agree. I think the phone listen. I think everything

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Speaker 3: is bittersweet. I think there's a lot of great things

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Speaker 3: the Internet has done and social media has done. It

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Speaker 3: has given us more information totally is in some ways

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Speaker 3: made us more connected, in some ways made us more disconnected.

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Speaker 3: I think the number one problem with it is just

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Speaker 3: the sheer amount of noise it is. And I don't

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Speaker 3: think the human brain is built to handle that by

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Speaker 3: any means.

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Speaker 2: It's too much. It's too much noise.

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Speaker 1: When you think about the fact that the first silent

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Speaker 1: movie when the director had the great idea to put

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Speaker 1: the camera right along the train track and the train

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Speaker 1: came at camera and everyone jumped up, screaming and ran

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Speaker 1: out of the theater because the human brain couldn't comprehend

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Speaker 1: the train could be coming at you, but from inside

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Speaker 1: a screen like that was it. That was nineteen ten,

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Speaker 1: nineteen twelve. That's one hundred years now.

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Speaker 2: Now look what our brains and now we're.

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Speaker 1: We're we're consuming more media every day. Then this is

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Speaker 1: probably an old statistic. It's probably more now. This is

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Speaker 1: ten years ago. We consume more media every twenty four

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Speaker 1: hours than had been made in the past ten thousand

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Speaker 1: years combined. Of course, everyone's losing their mouths, brain and the.

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Speaker 2: Train is soothing to me. Yeah, fall asleep to that.

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Speaker 2: I'm like, oh, the subway literally.

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Speaker 1: We'll be back in just a minute. But here's a

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Speaker 1: word from our sponsors.

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Speaker 2: Okay, are we old.

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Speaker 1: Here's what's interesting.

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Speaker 2: That's a yes, it's a yes and no.

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Speaker 1: And this comes from loving things like quantum physics and philosophy,

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Speaker 1: but also from the literal experience I'm living, which is

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Speaker 1: I turned forty. I had like a complete death and

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Speaker 1: rebirth of the soul. Talk about trauma. I was like, oh,

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Speaker 1: nothing in my reality is what I think it is? Cool, Well,

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Speaker 1: where do I start over if I'm starting from zero

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Speaker 1: and things are better than they've ever been. And I

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Speaker 1: took off everybody else's book during that time and truly

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Speaker 1: picked up what feels like it's mine and meant for me.

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Speaker 1: And I'm in my forties now and like I say

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Speaker 1: this with no conceit, there's nobody meaner to me than me.

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Speaker 1: So whatever troll is listening to this, who's like, let

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Speaker 1: me knock her down a peg, like nice, try to

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Speaker 1: try living in my brain. But honestly, I've never felt cuter.

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Speaker 1: My style has never been better. I ever had better sex,

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Speaker 1: I've never had better relationships.

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Speaker 2: I'm not even listening to you. I'm just look at

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Speaker 2: how hot you are.

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Speaker 1: Like, I'm like loving my life in a way I

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Speaker 1: couldn't love it in my twenties as much as I

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Speaker 1: hated it in my thirties. And I'm like, oh, I

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Speaker 1: sort of feel like I'm aging backwards.

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Speaker 2: Spiritually, absolutely, And I see that.

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Speaker 1: Talk to me about that desire, that strategy, because whether

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Speaker 1: it's ACFC, whether it's the Toronto Tempo and you're in

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Speaker 1: your hometown, Like, how are you building out of the

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Speaker 1: traditional entertainment vertical for women and really bringing people into

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Speaker 1: the conversation around gender equity in a way that feels

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Speaker 1: frankly fun.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, because it can be pretty boring.

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Speaker 3: Yes, anytime we talk about the patriarch or gender quality,

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Speaker 3: people are like, that's not sexy, and I get it.

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Speaker 2: So I try to make it really accessible.

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Speaker 3: You know, from the beginning of my career, I've always

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Speaker 3: been someone that has had my toe different a lot

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Speaker 3: of different things. I think out of necessity, I never

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Speaker 3: felt safe doing one thing, and I'm a multi hyphen

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Speaker 3: it for that reason.

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Speaker 2: I think that comes from like.

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Speaker 3: Alsoma having immigrant parents, where it's like, what's the plan,

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Speaker 3: what's the back of plan?

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Speaker 2: How do I make sure this is a fail safe?

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Speaker 3: And so you know, when I was a creator and

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Speaker 3: I started to make money, I was like, Okay, and

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Speaker 3: I'm going to write a book and I'll go on

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Speaker 3: some tours and I'll have merged and I'll make sure

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Speaker 3: I have a production company.

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Speaker 2: I'll start a charity.

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Speaker 3: I've always been a kind of three sixty approach type

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Speaker 3: of person out of safety and necessity. Once I start

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Speaker 3: to have enough resources in miney to be like I

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Speaker 3: can start investing into things and like having a little

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Speaker 3: bit of fun. I have just learned through my travels

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Speaker 3: and through my charity work.

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Speaker 2: I'm a really good person my charity work. That is

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Speaker 2: through my charity work that the.

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Speaker 3: Greatest investment you can actually make is in girls and women.

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Speaker 3: There is no greater return on investment. And I've seen

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Speaker 3: it firsthand when I go to any corner of this world,

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Speaker 3: if you invest in a girl, it will go above

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Speaker 3: and beyond.

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Speaker 2: The ripple effect is wild.

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Speaker 3: When you invest in a girl, she goes to school

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Speaker 3: and then her family benefits.

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Speaker 1: And to be clear, for everyone rolling their eyes being like,

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Speaker 1: what about the boys, it's better for the boys too. Yeah, oh,

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Speaker 1: it's better for a center the girls and the investment.

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Speaker 1: Boys benefit.

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Speaker 3: Also, it is actually factually and statistically true that if

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Speaker 3: you invest in girls, the whole world will benefit.

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Speaker 2: Correct. Yes, so relax, we're doing this for you too. Yeah.

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Speaker 2: But also, but also I will.

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Speaker 3: Also have to let you call you out and say

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Speaker 3: that if you're response to that is what about the boys,

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Speaker 3: then you need to check yourself because girls and women

442
00:20:08,359 --> 00:20:10,640
Speaker 3: do not get the opportunities that boys get across the world.

443
00:20:10,680 --> 00:20:12,080
Speaker 2: So let's just call it what it is. Let's get

444
00:20:12,080 --> 00:20:13,359
Speaker 2: off your high on for first second. Let's just have

445
00:20:13,359 --> 00:20:16,760
Speaker 2: an honest conversation. Back to.

446
00:20:17,520 --> 00:20:22,680
Speaker 3: Having said that the patriarchy does actually negatively, factually negatively

447
00:20:22,720 --> 00:20:24,560
Speaker 3: impact boys and men as well, and that has been

448
00:20:24,600 --> 00:20:27,640
Speaker 3: proven time and time again. But yes, especially with sports.

449
00:20:27,680 --> 00:20:30,280
Speaker 3: You know, I've been I go to India once a year,

450
00:20:30,520 --> 00:20:33,720
Speaker 3: and I've heard some amazing stories about how a simple

451
00:20:33,880 --> 00:20:35,160
Speaker 3: small sports.

452
00:20:34,720 --> 00:20:36,879
Speaker 2: Team can change a girl's life.

453
00:20:37,200 --> 00:20:40,520
Speaker 3: The last village I went to in India, a simple

454
00:20:40,680 --> 00:20:44,199
Speaker 3: soccer team that the girls were part of prevented like

455
00:20:44,400 --> 00:20:47,320
Speaker 3: so many child marriages in that village because they were

456
00:20:47,359 --> 00:20:48,919
Speaker 3: like part of a team, and they learned how to

457
00:20:48,960 --> 00:20:51,480
Speaker 3: band together, and they learned that they could be a

458
00:20:51,520 --> 00:20:53,560
Speaker 3: team and be outspoken. And so one of the girls,

459
00:20:53,600 --> 00:20:55,560
Speaker 3: their parents wanted them to get married, and the whole

460
00:20:55,560 --> 00:20:56,960
Speaker 3: team showed about this girl's house.

461
00:20:56,840 --> 00:20:58,560
Speaker 2: To be like, no, we're all part of a team.

462
00:20:58,600 --> 00:21:01,359
Speaker 3: We're not letting you get her married, like curbed child

463
00:21:01,359 --> 00:21:05,560
Speaker 3: marriage in that community. You know, simple things like letting

464
00:21:05,560 --> 00:21:08,440
Speaker 3: them learn how to build skills together taught them that,

465
00:21:08,560 --> 00:21:11,560
Speaker 3: oh yeah, friendship is important and like banding together. It's

466
00:21:11,560 --> 00:21:13,920
Speaker 3: just it's crazy amount of things sports does for confidence,

467
00:21:14,080 --> 00:21:17,600
Speaker 3: even teaching them like financial literacy. It's across the board,

468
00:21:17,640 --> 00:21:19,880
Speaker 3: a great investment. And so going back to Angel City

469
00:21:19,880 --> 00:21:21,879
Speaker 3: in Toronto, Tempo, I'm gonna keep it real. I know

470
00:21:22,040 --> 00:21:25,639
Speaker 3: nothing about soccer. I don't know a single rule about soccer.

471
00:21:25,840 --> 00:21:27,600
Speaker 3: I never played sports. If you asked me with a

472
00:21:27,600 --> 00:21:29,199
Speaker 3: girl in the playground that was nine years old, she

473
00:21:29,280 --> 00:21:30,800
Speaker 3: was probably crying because she was bad at running.

474
00:21:30,960 --> 00:21:33,000
Speaker 2: I was horrible at sports. My whole life. I know,

475
00:21:33,080 --> 00:21:36,120
Speaker 2: I give as if I could be athletic, it's all

476
00:21:36,119 --> 00:21:38,280
Speaker 2: a facad. I give tomboy athletic.

477
00:21:38,400 --> 00:21:41,080
Speaker 3: I can aim, I can throw, I can catch, can't

478
00:21:41,119 --> 00:21:43,360
Speaker 3: run fast or for a long periods of time, can't

479
00:21:43,440 --> 00:21:45,160
Speaker 3: jump at all, can't get off the ground.

480
00:21:45,440 --> 00:21:47,440
Speaker 2: It can't happen. It literally cannot happen.

481
00:21:47,760 --> 00:21:49,360
Speaker 3: And so I was like, those who do not play

482
00:21:49,400 --> 00:21:52,080
Speaker 3: sports support sports, and that is what I do. And

483
00:21:52,119 --> 00:21:55,080
Speaker 3: so yes, exactly, and so for Angel City when it

484
00:21:55,119 --> 00:21:58,199
Speaker 3: came across my desk, literally all they said was women's sports.

485
00:21:58,200 --> 00:22:00,399
Speaker 3: And my said, say, Las, I know nothing about soccer,

486
00:22:00,400 --> 00:22:02,359
Speaker 3: but women I will invest in time and time again.

487
00:22:02,640 --> 00:22:05,840
Speaker 3: The Toronto Temple is really exciting because Toronto's my hometown.

488
00:22:05,920 --> 00:22:06,719
Speaker 2: I'm from Toronto.

489
00:22:06,720 --> 00:22:09,720
Speaker 3: I'm a massive Raptors fan, which is the NBA team

490
00:22:10,040 --> 00:22:13,160
Speaker 3: you only have one in Canada. Flew back and forth

491
00:22:13,160 --> 00:22:16,399
Speaker 3: for the playoffs when they won the championship, and I

492
00:22:16,440 --> 00:22:18,639
Speaker 3: would have been devastated if I wasn't a part of

493
00:22:18,640 --> 00:22:20,080
Speaker 3: the ownership group for the Toronto Temple.

494
00:22:20,080 --> 00:22:20,520
Speaker 2: And I am.

495
00:22:20,560 --> 00:22:22,159
Speaker 3: It's the biggest investment I've ever made, and it's the

496
00:22:22,160 --> 00:22:23,560
Speaker 3: most meaningful investment I've ever made.

497
00:22:23,560 --> 00:22:26,399
Speaker 2: And I have zero regrets about. I would do it

498
00:22:26,400 --> 00:22:27,040
Speaker 2: time and time again.

499
00:22:27,119 --> 00:22:27,560
Speaker 4: I love it.

500
00:22:27,920 --> 00:22:29,680
Speaker 1: I love it. I get it because you know, La

501
00:22:29,760 --> 00:22:34,359
Speaker 1: is my hometown. Yeah, and my mom's whole side of

502
00:22:34,359 --> 00:22:37,000
Speaker 1: my family's from here, like all over New York and

503
00:22:37,040 --> 00:22:40,639
Speaker 1: New Jersey and obviously big sports culture here, Irony that

504
00:22:40,680 --> 00:22:44,000
Speaker 1: my dad, who's also Canadian, is much like you.

505
00:22:44,000 --> 00:22:45,280
Speaker 2: You just love us, I do.

506
00:22:45,400 --> 00:22:47,879
Speaker 1: I mean I'm a duly yeah, you know, like I

507
00:22:48,280 --> 00:22:50,959
Speaker 1: feel sort of like vaguely like I'm in the CIA

508
00:22:51,040 --> 00:22:53,320
Speaker 1: when I travel with two passports, who what do you need?

509
00:22:53,840 --> 00:22:58,240
Speaker 1: Really feels fun for me. But my dad has absolutely

510
00:22:58,240 --> 00:23:01,640
Speaker 1: no sports skill. He's an artist. His biggest fear when

511
00:23:01,640 --> 00:23:04,200
Speaker 1: my mom was pregnant with me was that I would

512
00:23:04,200 --> 00:23:05,800
Speaker 1: be a boy and he would have to learn about

513
00:23:05,840 --> 00:23:08,320
Speaker 1: hockey because he had avoided that his whole life. And

514
00:23:08,359 --> 00:23:12,560
Speaker 1: then outcomes this tomboy daughter who loves hockey, loves soccer,

515
00:23:12,720 --> 00:23:16,639
Speaker 1: loves basketball, and really thought she was going to be

516
00:23:16,800 --> 00:23:20,520
Speaker 1: like a baller soccer player. And then I think I

517
00:23:20,840 --> 00:23:24,119
Speaker 1: think I made it to like nine on an AYSO team.

518
00:23:24,280 --> 00:23:28,439
Speaker 1: Before I was that it's like a local kids soccer

519
00:23:28,520 --> 00:23:31,159
Speaker 1: league thing that all my friends played in. But I

520
00:23:31,240 --> 00:23:33,040
Speaker 1: kept having to run off the field to grab my

521
00:23:33,080 --> 00:23:35,920
Speaker 1: inhaler from my mom and like make sure I didn't

522
00:23:35,960 --> 00:23:37,840
Speaker 1: die of an asthma attack, and run back on. And

523
00:23:37,880 --> 00:23:40,359
Speaker 1: I was like, this feels like a sign, but I'm not.

524
00:23:41,160 --> 00:23:43,000
Speaker 1: I'm not going to be like a collegiate athlete.

525
00:23:43,119 --> 00:23:44,000
Speaker 2: It's not meant for me.

526
00:23:44,680 --> 00:23:48,000
Speaker 1: So I became the asthmatic theater kid who also doesn't jump.

527
00:23:48,640 --> 00:23:51,920
Speaker 1: But I root very loudly for our time.

528
00:23:52,320 --> 00:23:53,879
Speaker 2: And you see me at the games. I'm eating the

529
00:23:53,880 --> 00:23:55,800
Speaker 2: most all the time, all the time, all the time.

530
00:23:55,800 --> 00:23:59,000
Speaker 1: You're very good. You're a very good like sideline host.

531
00:23:59,160 --> 00:23:59,520
Speaker 2: I try.

532
00:23:59,720 --> 00:24:01,359
Speaker 1: I think give you that where you're like the host

533
00:24:01,440 --> 00:24:02,160
Speaker 1: of the owners.

534
00:24:02,359 --> 00:24:03,400
Speaker 2: Oh thank you. Yeah.

535
00:24:03,400 --> 00:24:05,320
Speaker 3: I do pride myself so for the Toronto Tempo. My

536
00:24:05,320 --> 00:24:07,640
Speaker 3: official title is chief Hype Officer. I know, I really

537
00:24:07,640 --> 00:24:09,560
Speaker 3: do pride myself and my ability to cheer people on.

538
00:24:09,640 --> 00:24:12,320
Speaker 3: I like to be people's cheerleaders because we're so I

539
00:24:12,320 --> 00:24:14,560
Speaker 3: feel like we've become so vocal. We've gotten such a

540
00:24:14,600 --> 00:24:16,560
Speaker 3: habit of becoming so vocal. But the things we don't like.

541
00:24:17,400 --> 00:24:20,119
Speaker 3: Everyone is shouting what they don't like. Great, keep shouting

542
00:24:20,119 --> 00:24:22,480
Speaker 3: about that's important too. We should also shut about the

543
00:24:22,480 --> 00:24:24,239
Speaker 3: things we do want more of and we do.

544
00:24:24,440 --> 00:24:26,280
Speaker 1: Like, there's got to be the good feedback.

545
00:24:26,520 --> 00:24:28,879
Speaker 3: Correct, it can't just be the negative feel What do

546
00:24:28,920 --> 00:24:30,520
Speaker 3: we all do when we're scrolling online? Let me take

547
00:24:30,560 --> 00:24:32,520
Speaker 3: the comments to see what mean things are being said, Like, no,

548
00:24:32,640 --> 00:24:34,560
Speaker 3: I want to like cheer people on and make people

549
00:24:34,560 --> 00:24:35,520
Speaker 3: feel good about themselves.

550
00:24:35,560 --> 00:24:37,800
Speaker 2: Here's I'm not gonna tell you. It's for selfish reasons.

551
00:24:38,200 --> 00:24:40,480
Speaker 3: Spiritually, I believe if everyone is just the best version

552
00:24:40,520 --> 00:24:42,120
Speaker 3: of themselves, my life will also be better.

553
00:24:42,280 --> 00:24:44,200
Speaker 2: That's I believe that if I'm a good friend.

554
00:24:44,080 --> 00:24:45,440
Speaker 3: To you and you are the best version of yourself

555
00:24:45,480 --> 00:24:47,159
Speaker 3: with you you're with me, that's a win for me

556
00:24:47,359 --> 00:24:48,679
Speaker 3: totally also, and.

557
00:24:48,760 --> 00:24:50,960
Speaker 1: A win win is exactly what we should be aiming.

558
00:24:51,000 --> 00:24:53,240
Speaker 2: Correct. Simple math, Simple math.

559
00:24:53,720 --> 00:24:57,600
Speaker 1: You know I like a little data set. Yes, I'm like,

560
00:24:57,640 --> 00:25:00,359
Speaker 1: you're the chief hype woman, and I'm like the chief nerd,

561
00:25:00,480 --> 00:25:02,520
Speaker 1: and I like the chief science story and I like it.

562
00:25:02,680 --> 00:25:04,520
Speaker 1: I when I was little, I wanted to be Bill

563
00:25:04,600 --> 00:25:07,399
Speaker 1: NY's assistant, like more than anything in my life.

564
00:25:07,560 --> 00:25:08,760
Speaker 2: I feel like that's very attainable.

565
00:25:08,880 --> 00:25:11,000
Speaker 1: I and then the crazy what an insane sentence? I'm

566
00:25:11,040 --> 00:25:14,000
Speaker 1: about to say. I met him many years ago at

567
00:25:14,080 --> 00:25:16,480
Speaker 1: the White House of all places, and I was like,

568
00:25:16,480 --> 00:25:18,240
Speaker 1: Bill Night, I am your biggest fan, and he goes,

569
00:25:18,280 --> 00:25:20,280
Speaker 1: I'm your biggest fan. I said, I don't even think

570
00:25:20,280 --> 00:25:22,399
Speaker 1: you know me, and it doesn't matter, and he started

571
00:25:22,480 --> 00:25:24,560
Speaker 1: laughing and I was like, I don't know if the

572
00:25:24,600 --> 00:25:26,560
Speaker 1: answer is yes or no, but we're gonna be friends.

573
00:25:26,640 --> 00:25:29,600
Speaker 2: I feel like that's very possible. That would I would

574
00:25:30,600 --> 00:25:32,159
Speaker 2: give me a lab code, you know what. I'm going

575
00:25:32,200 --> 00:25:33,960
Speaker 2: to make that happen. Thank you never met him, but

576
00:25:34,000 --> 00:25:35,840
Speaker 2: it's my mission. Now. Okay, that's I'm going to make

577
00:25:35,880 --> 00:25:36,240
Speaker 2: that happen.

578
00:25:36,320 --> 00:25:37,040
Speaker 1: I appreciate that.

579
00:25:37,040 --> 00:25:39,120
Speaker 2: Has it been on the podcast not yet? Well, now

580
00:25:39,160 --> 00:25:39,720
Speaker 2: he will be.

581
00:25:39,760 --> 00:25:42,600
Speaker 1: Okay, I have a Canada question for you. Hit me

582
00:25:42,880 --> 00:25:46,879
Speaker 1: because obviously I do love it very much. And one

583
00:25:46,920 --> 00:25:49,600
Speaker 1: of the things I've loved about my time living in

584
00:25:49,600 --> 00:25:55,960
Speaker 1: Toronto working is how incredibly diverse the city is and

585
00:25:56,760 --> 00:25:59,639
Speaker 1: how much Toronto knows its diversity is the coolest thing

586
00:25:59,680 --> 00:26:00,040
Speaker 1: about that.

587
00:26:00,040 --> 00:26:03,120
Speaker 2: Absolutely, it is the coolest thing I And people always

588
00:26:03,119 --> 00:26:05,080
Speaker 2: ask me what my upbringing was like, like, was I

589
00:26:05,119 --> 00:26:07,800
Speaker 2: mean everything, I'll be roth with you. In high school.

590
00:26:07,840 --> 00:26:09,520
Speaker 3: I think in my high school there was ten white people.

591
00:26:10,400 --> 00:26:13,040
Speaker 3: Everyone else was a personal color and I also will say,

592
00:26:13,040 --> 00:26:15,360
Speaker 3: living in Toronto, I don't have a single friend. I'm

593
00:26:15,359 --> 00:26:18,560
Speaker 3: not exaggerated, not a single friend whose parents are not immigrants. Yeah,

594
00:26:18,560 --> 00:26:20,480
Speaker 3: so all my friends speaking of their language. I'll eat

595
00:26:20,480 --> 00:26:22,920
Speaker 3: different foods where it's very normal. The first movie I

596
00:26:22,920 --> 00:26:24,960
Speaker 3: watched was Bollywood. The first concert I went to his Bollywood.

597
00:26:25,080 --> 00:26:27,639
Speaker 3: First song I listened to his Bollywood. I just I

598
00:26:27,640 --> 00:26:29,680
Speaker 3: can speak a little tam while I understand Jamaican path

599
00:26:29,720 --> 00:26:31,480
Speaker 3: why I grew up eating jerk chicken. And but it's like,

600
00:26:31,480 --> 00:26:35,560
Speaker 3: it's all very we love everyone's culture. No one's hiding

601
00:26:35,560 --> 00:26:37,640
Speaker 3: their culture. It'd be weird to hyde your culture. It's

602
00:26:37,680 --> 00:26:39,879
Speaker 3: like you wear it on your sleep. The only time

603
00:26:39,920 --> 00:26:41,439
Speaker 3: I felt like that was when I moved to La

604
00:26:41,520 --> 00:26:43,840
Speaker 3: a decade ago, in twenty fifteen. That is when I

605
00:26:43,840 --> 00:26:46,760
Speaker 3: had culture shock, because in twenty fifteen, almost no brown

606
00:26:46,800 --> 00:26:49,359
Speaker 3: people lived in LA when I moved there, and I

607
00:26:49,480 --> 00:26:52,040
Speaker 3: was like, oh, nobody actually understands any of the cultural

608
00:26:52,080 --> 00:26:54,960
Speaker 3: references I'm making. No one knows the food I'm talking about.

609
00:26:55,080 --> 00:26:57,159
Speaker 3: When I go into a meeting with an exec, this

610
00:26:57,240 --> 00:26:59,080
Speaker 3: exec is trying to convince me that my culture is

611
00:26:59,160 --> 00:26:59,960
Speaker 3: niche and not cool.

612
00:27:00,320 --> 00:27:02,080
Speaker 2: And I just got beaten down.

613
00:27:01,880 --> 00:27:04,119
Speaker 3: Over years and years and years of that, which is

614
00:27:04,119 --> 00:27:06,480
Speaker 3: why I now so proactively go out of my way

615
00:27:06,520 --> 00:27:08,360
Speaker 3: to be like, no, my culture is really cool, and

616
00:27:08,560 --> 00:27:10,200
Speaker 3: I try to tell stories about my culture.

617
00:27:10,359 --> 00:27:10,800
Speaker 2: I throw my.

618
00:27:10,800 --> 00:27:13,199
Speaker 3: Annual the Vali Party, which you know, well, yeah, I

619
00:27:13,280 --> 00:27:14,280
Speaker 3: just do everything to be like.

620
00:27:14,280 --> 00:27:15,880
Speaker 2: No, actually, this is amazing.

621
00:27:15,880 --> 00:27:17,960
Speaker 3: I want to bring a piece of the Toronto diversity

622
00:27:17,960 --> 00:27:19,720
Speaker 3: because I know it's cool and I love my culture

623
00:27:19,720 --> 00:27:21,040
Speaker 3: in this time for everyone else to catch up in

624
00:27:21,080 --> 00:27:21,640
Speaker 3: the city.

625
00:27:21,800 --> 00:27:22,840
Speaker 2: So I'm very adamant on.

626
00:27:22,800 --> 00:27:28,760
Speaker 1: That I get white privilege. Nobody talks about the privilege

627
00:27:28,800 --> 00:27:32,280
Speaker 1: of exposure, and that's the thing I'm the most grateful

628
00:27:32,280 --> 00:27:35,840
Speaker 1: for in my upbringing. Yeah, is like my uncle Jeff's

629
00:27:35,840 --> 00:27:38,879
Speaker 1: boyfriend did drag every Saturday night as Diana Ross. That

630
00:27:38,920 --> 00:27:41,400
Speaker 1: man looks insane in a red sequin gay.

631
00:27:41,520 --> 00:27:43,920
Speaker 2: Yes, let's talk like we.

632
00:27:43,720 --> 00:27:46,639
Speaker 1: Were homies with the Japanese family that lived at the

633
00:27:46,680 --> 00:27:49,240
Speaker 1: end of our block, that owned the little sushi restaurant

634
00:27:49,240 --> 00:27:51,880
Speaker 1: in the Strip Mall two blocks from our house, and

635
00:27:51,920 --> 00:27:54,040
Speaker 1: like they taught me how to hand roll my own

636
00:27:54,080 --> 00:27:57,560
Speaker 1: sushi when I was a kid, Like I was constantly

637
00:27:57,640 --> 00:28:02,920
Speaker 1: eating Ethiopian food, Mexican food, me different people, right yeah.

638
00:28:03,080 --> 00:28:07,560
Speaker 1: And just watching the people my parents were friends with

639
00:28:07,640 --> 00:28:11,080
Speaker 1: and gravitated towards, and how in our home made such

640
00:28:11,119 --> 00:28:14,080
Speaker 1: an impact on me. And I think about how weirdly

641
00:28:14,160 --> 00:28:18,040
Speaker 1: lucky I was to grow up by seventh grade going

642
00:28:18,080 --> 00:28:21,560
Speaker 1: to this like little private all girls school that for

643
00:28:21,640 --> 00:28:25,359
Speaker 1: what you think that is, was like very diverse, and

644
00:28:25,440 --> 00:28:27,960
Speaker 1: we didn't have religious celebrations.

645
00:28:27,960 --> 00:28:29,640
Speaker 2: We did cultural fairs, right yeah.

646
00:28:29,680 --> 00:28:32,399
Speaker 1: And my friend Mega's mom would come in and hannah

647
00:28:32,440 --> 00:28:36,040
Speaker 1: all the girls' hands, And it's the thing I wish, like,

648
00:28:36,119 --> 00:28:38,920
Speaker 1: I wish I could give that to more people that

649
00:28:39,120 --> 00:28:42,640
Speaker 1: are afraid of their neighbors or afraid of the town

650
00:28:42,720 --> 00:28:44,680
Speaker 1: next door. I'm like, no, you're missing.

651
00:28:44,400 --> 00:28:45,240
Speaker 2: The best totally.

652
00:28:45,720 --> 00:28:48,800
Speaker 3: And I will say, I think what you're saying is

653
00:28:48,840 --> 00:28:51,000
Speaker 3: so beautiful and it's so sentimental, but I need to

654
00:28:51,040 --> 00:28:51,840
Speaker 3: be petty for one second.

655
00:28:51,880 --> 00:28:53,000
Speaker 2: You have another Indian friend.

656
00:28:53,640 --> 00:28:55,240
Speaker 1: My friends from high school that's not me.

657
00:28:55,720 --> 00:28:59,600
Speaker 2: Yeah, how dare you use? Sorry? Oh?

658
00:29:00,160 --> 00:29:01,960
Speaker 3: I love representation of diversity, but i'm're only in the

659
00:29:01,960 --> 00:29:04,200
Speaker 3: infront of kidding, like I'm I'm.

660
00:29:04,240 --> 00:29:06,240
Speaker 2: I'm I'm kidding. Mega. I see you. I would put

661
00:29:06,280 --> 00:29:08,200
Speaker 2: respect on your name. I see you. You mentioned a

662
00:29:08,240 --> 00:29:10,320
Speaker 2: Mega I like that. Okay, very good. Sorry, but what

663
00:29:10,320 --> 00:29:13,320
Speaker 2: you're saying is very sentiential. Okay, let's go.

664
00:29:13,480 --> 00:29:14,920
Speaker 1: Our parents were like, you guys are really going to

665
00:29:15,000 --> 00:29:16,720
Speaker 1: live together? Like you're going and we were like, yeah.

666
00:29:16,560 --> 00:29:17,160
Speaker 2: We're scared.

667
00:29:17,480 --> 00:29:19,920
Speaker 1: We're going from like fifty fifty five girls in our

668
00:29:20,000 --> 00:29:23,960
Speaker 1: graduating class to a school with like thirty thousand kids

669
00:29:23,960 --> 00:29:26,240
Speaker 1: in undergrad I was like, I'm not prepared for this.

670
00:29:26,360 --> 00:29:28,360
Speaker 3: Well, on a serious note to what you're saying, I

671
00:29:28,360 --> 00:29:31,040
Speaker 3: think what you're saying is so important because I think

672
00:29:31,040 --> 00:29:36,000
Speaker 3: there's something really sad and dangerous about anyone who feels

673
00:29:36,080 --> 00:29:36,920
Speaker 3: like they don't.

674
00:29:36,640 --> 00:29:37,520
Speaker 2: Have to learn more.

675
00:29:38,720 --> 00:29:40,840
Speaker 3: I really feel like anyone who feels like I don't

676
00:29:40,840 --> 00:29:42,479
Speaker 3: have to meet more people, I don't have to learn

677
00:29:42,520 --> 00:29:44,320
Speaker 3: about other people's point of views, I don't have to

678
00:29:44,320 --> 00:29:46,480
Speaker 3: have conversations, and because I just have it figured out,

679
00:29:46,720 --> 00:29:49,480
Speaker 3: that's a very sad and dangerous place to live. And

680
00:29:49,520 --> 00:29:51,280
Speaker 3: I would say I'm very committed to being a student

681
00:29:51,320 --> 00:29:53,440
Speaker 3: for life in every faceta. Even if I think I

682
00:29:53,440 --> 00:29:55,520
Speaker 3: have something figured out, I want to still have the

683
00:29:55,560 --> 00:29:58,280
Speaker 3: conversation to be like, change my mind, show me perspective.

684
00:29:58,320 --> 00:29:59,920
Speaker 3: I don't know, but I think a lot of this like,

685
00:30:00,040 --> 00:30:01,440
Speaker 3: I don't need to meet my neighbors, and I don't

686
00:30:01,440 --> 00:30:02,760
Speaker 3: need to see another point of view, and I don't

687
00:30:02,760 --> 00:30:04,760
Speaker 3: need to learn a different way of life or different culture.

688
00:30:05,400 --> 00:30:08,800
Speaker 3: I feel like that's very limiting to your life experience. Absolutely,

689
00:30:09,200 --> 00:30:10,560
Speaker 3: you should always want to learn more.

690
00:30:10,640 --> 00:30:13,280
Speaker 1: It's also, frankly, very limiting to your palate. Correct you

691
00:30:13,640 --> 00:30:14,440
Speaker 1: eat boring food?

692
00:30:14,560 --> 00:30:16,920
Speaker 2: Correct? Absolutely, lady, this is boring music.

693
00:30:17,000 --> 00:30:20,160
Speaker 1: Thank you, thank you. Yep, we'll be back in just

694
00:30:20,200 --> 00:30:22,920
Speaker 1: a minute after a few words from our favorite sponsors.

695
00:30:29,760 --> 00:30:35,240
Speaker 1: When you think about how influenced you are by your culture,

696
00:30:35,600 --> 00:30:39,840
Speaker 1: both you know, Indian and Canadian, and then the way

697
00:30:39,880 --> 00:30:42,880
Speaker 1: that you came to be this woman telling stories in

698
00:30:42,920 --> 00:30:46,240
Speaker 1: the way that you do, how does all of that

699
00:30:46,320 --> 00:30:48,880
Speaker 1: coalesced to the moment where this movie is coming out?

700
00:30:49,040 --> 00:30:53,000
Speaker 2: Like, oh my tell me, tell me. Okay, so the

701
00:30:53,120 --> 00:30:54,640
Speaker 2: movie was shot in Toronto.

702
00:30:54,880 --> 00:30:56,800
Speaker 3: Yeah, so it has a lot of nods to my

703
00:30:56,880 --> 00:30:59,200
Speaker 3: upbringing and my mom's upbringing. So my mom is actually

704
00:30:59,200 --> 00:31:01,240
Speaker 3: factually the culture consultant on the movie.

705
00:31:01,800 --> 00:31:03,440
Speaker 2: She is she worked on the movie. Did she stay

706
00:31:03,480 --> 00:31:05,040
Speaker 2: with a little script? And she did?

707
00:31:05,400 --> 00:31:07,960
Speaker 3: She did because the class we shoot some scenes in

708
00:31:07,960 --> 00:31:12,040
Speaker 3: India and they're mirrored off my mom's classroom and any

709
00:31:12,200 --> 00:31:14,120
Speaker 3: there's a few scenes where we speak and Jabbi in Hindiana.

710
00:31:14,160 --> 00:31:15,600
Speaker 3: Mom's making sure we say it right, and she's making

711
00:31:15,600 --> 00:31:17,000
Speaker 3: sure all the sparring is right. Of all the things,

712
00:31:17,240 --> 00:31:20,680
Speaker 3: she's exactly exactly. You put respect on my name exactly.

713
00:31:20,840 --> 00:31:24,440
Speaker 3: So it is mirroring my mom's upbringing to a certain extent.

714
00:31:24,560 --> 00:31:27,040
Speaker 3: It is a lot of nods to my upbringing in Toronto,

715
00:31:27,200 --> 00:31:29,239
Speaker 3: whether it's the school name, whether it's like the club name,

716
00:31:29,320 --> 00:31:32,280
Speaker 3: whatever it may be. But you know, I grew up

717
00:31:32,280 --> 00:31:33,880
Speaker 3: in Toronto. I did not grew up India. My mom

718
00:31:33,920 --> 00:31:35,320
Speaker 3: grew up India. But I think one thing we have

719
00:31:35,400 --> 00:31:38,280
Speaker 3: in common is that anything related to sex is taboo.

720
00:31:38,320 --> 00:31:39,840
Speaker 3: And this is true for a lot of cultures, not

721
00:31:39,880 --> 00:31:41,920
Speaker 3: just Indian cultures, a lot every culture, i'd say in

722
00:31:41,920 --> 00:31:42,440
Speaker 3: the world.

723
00:31:43,760 --> 00:31:47,120
Speaker 2: Catholic exactly. And so I won't lie.

724
00:31:47,160 --> 00:31:49,560
Speaker 3: Like for most of my life, the topic of sex

725
00:31:49,600 --> 00:31:51,960
Speaker 3: has been a major pain point. It has been super

726
00:31:52,040 --> 00:31:54,920
Speaker 3: stressful for me. Everything from getting my period to like

727
00:31:56,480 --> 00:31:59,800
Speaker 3: learning about my sexuality, everything has just been a major

728
00:32:00,440 --> 00:32:01,240
Speaker 3: It has been a.

729
00:32:01,280 --> 00:32:02,200
Speaker 2: Huge burden for me.

730
00:32:03,320 --> 00:32:05,440
Speaker 3: I feel like I wish I had this movie growing up,

731
00:32:05,480 --> 00:32:07,280
Speaker 3: and I probably would have been so much more comfortable

732
00:32:07,280 --> 00:32:09,720
Speaker 3: in my body and so much more confident and so

733
00:32:09,800 --> 00:32:11,120
Speaker 3: much just more knowledgeable.

734
00:32:11,160 --> 00:32:13,080
Speaker 2: And so when you say that.

735
00:32:14,800 --> 00:32:18,400
Speaker 1: Writing this film because for our audience, you star in it,

736
00:32:18,440 --> 00:32:21,959
Speaker 1: you wrote it, you produced it. I die for your

737
00:32:22,000 --> 00:32:23,760
Speaker 1: mom with a notebook like standing at.

738
00:32:23,680 --> 00:32:26,600
Speaker 3: Video Village and it's a sex comedy.

739
00:32:26,880 --> 00:32:30,520
Speaker 1: But like, how do you think being able to reflect

740
00:32:30,560 --> 00:32:32,240
Speaker 1: on what you wish you had known?

741
00:32:32,760 --> 00:32:33,080
Speaker 2: Both?

742
00:32:33,520 --> 00:32:38,040
Speaker 1: I think it's so on point culturally and also like

743
00:32:38,080 --> 00:32:40,880
Speaker 1: we're the first generation who can look up therapy and

744
00:32:41,000 --> 00:32:45,560
Speaker 1: stuff on Instagram. So when you look back at yourself

745
00:32:46,040 --> 00:32:49,960
Speaker 1: us pre having access to those things, were you also

746
00:32:50,120 --> 00:32:53,880
Speaker 1: trying to write to answer some of the questions you

747
00:32:54,000 --> 00:32:54,880
Speaker 1: had as a kid.

748
00:32:55,520 --> 00:32:56,120
Speaker 2: A little bit.

749
00:32:56,240 --> 00:32:58,680
Speaker 3: Yeah, I think more than anything though, I was writing

750
00:32:58,720 --> 00:33:02,320
Speaker 3: from a place of how can I tell a story

751
00:33:02,320 --> 00:33:05,120
Speaker 3: that makes people feel less alone and awkward? Because I

752
00:33:05,160 --> 00:33:06,680
Speaker 3: think for most of my life, I remember when I

753
00:33:06,680 --> 00:33:08,520
Speaker 3: first moved to La and this is gonna be TMI,

754
00:33:08,560 --> 00:33:09,760
Speaker 3: but you're gonna have to deal with it.

755
00:33:10,720 --> 00:33:15,000
Speaker 2: In Indian culture. Yeah, there you go. In Indian culture,

756
00:33:15,040 --> 00:33:17,320
Speaker 2: you know, we're not taught how to use tampons.

757
00:33:17,480 --> 00:33:19,000
Speaker 3: That's like a big thing in a lot of cultures

758
00:33:19,000 --> 00:33:21,640
Speaker 3: where they're like anti tampons, and so I remember when

759
00:33:21,640 --> 00:33:26,400
Speaker 3: I have yes correct. I remember when I first moved

760
00:33:26,560 --> 00:33:29,120
Speaker 3: to LA I was like one of my.

761
00:33:29,120 --> 00:33:30,520
Speaker 2: Friends whenever was that, do you want a pat or tampon?

762
00:33:30,520 --> 00:33:31,960
Speaker 3: And she's like kind of made fun of me for

763
00:33:32,000 --> 00:33:34,400
Speaker 3: even asking pat, and I felt so embarrassed as an adult.

764
00:33:34,720 --> 00:33:36,800
Speaker 3: I was like, I'm so embarrassed. I don't know how

765
00:33:36,800 --> 00:33:39,080
Speaker 3: to talk about sex. It feels like everyone else knows this,

766
00:33:39,440 --> 00:33:41,480
Speaker 3: everybody else knows what they're doing. I'm the only person

767
00:33:41,560 --> 00:33:43,560
Speaker 3: that doesn't understand this. And it was a really lonely

768
00:33:43,600 --> 00:33:46,520
Speaker 3: and stressful feeling. And I wrote the movie from the

769
00:33:46,560 --> 00:33:49,040
Speaker 3: point of view of like, I think everyone kind of

770
00:33:49,080 --> 00:33:50,960
Speaker 3: feels like this at a time or another, and we

771
00:33:51,000 --> 00:33:54,200
Speaker 3: don't talk about it, and we're all just doing the

772
00:33:54,640 --> 00:33:58,000
Speaker 3: We're having sex but feeling really awkward and not knowing

773
00:33:58,040 --> 00:34:00,440
Speaker 3: how to talk about it, which is really dangerous place

774
00:34:00,520 --> 00:34:02,720
Speaker 3: to be. And so I wrote the movie. There's a

775
00:34:02,720 --> 00:34:04,240
Speaker 3: lot of jokes and there there's a lot of references

776
00:34:04,280 --> 00:34:05,720
Speaker 3: that I really had to fight for. There's one about

777
00:34:05,720 --> 00:34:07,680
Speaker 3: a tampa, and there's one about pubes. There's one about

778
00:34:07,680 --> 00:34:08,759
Speaker 3: a lot of things where I was like, no, I

779
00:34:08,840 --> 00:34:11,040
Speaker 3: want to have this joke in there because there's gonna

780
00:34:11,040 --> 00:34:12,799
Speaker 3: be a girl that watches that's like, oh my god,

781
00:34:12,840 --> 00:34:13,239
Speaker 3: thank god.

782
00:34:13,280 --> 00:34:15,440
Speaker 2: I thought it was the only one, and.

783
00:34:15,560 --> 00:34:19,440
Speaker 1: Like, don't sanitize the sex talk literally the sex movie.

784
00:34:19,360 --> 00:34:21,680
Speaker 3: Right, And so I wrote it with one thing in mind,

785
00:34:21,680 --> 00:34:24,919
Speaker 3: which was this is gonna be a completely unapologetic love

786
00:34:25,040 --> 00:34:27,720
Speaker 3: letter to girls and women who have just felt shame

787
00:34:27,760 --> 00:34:30,719
Speaker 3: around this subject their whole life. And it's about a

788
00:34:30,760 --> 00:34:33,399
Speaker 3: thirty year old virgin who finds herself teaching sex said,

789
00:34:33,760 --> 00:34:35,759
Speaker 3: and I will say, the virgin is not the butt

790
00:34:35,760 --> 00:34:37,640
Speaker 3: of the joke. It is not a movie making fun

791
00:34:37,680 --> 00:34:39,279
Speaker 3: of a woman who's a virgin. Because we've seen that,

792
00:34:39,320 --> 00:34:41,640
Speaker 3: We've seen Nike fun of the virgin. We also have

793
00:34:42,200 --> 00:34:44,680
Speaker 3: rarely ever seen sex comedies from the point of view

794
00:34:44,760 --> 00:34:46,920
Speaker 3: of a woman that is also female forward, and this

795
00:34:46,960 --> 00:34:49,120
Speaker 3: one is like, the women are the star of this movie.

796
00:34:49,600 --> 00:34:51,640
Speaker 3: Sure there's a man here or there, but like, the

797
00:34:51,680 --> 00:34:53,919
Speaker 3: women are the star of this film, and it's about

798
00:34:53,920 --> 00:34:55,840
Speaker 3: their point of view, and it's about unlearning the shame

799
00:34:55,840 --> 00:34:58,719
Speaker 3: that we've all been taught through raunchy sex jokes. And

800
00:34:58,800 --> 00:35:01,360
Speaker 3: I think using comedy a vehicle to talk about some real.

801
00:35:01,239 --> 00:35:05,680
Speaker 1: Shit, and it's so important, And what excites me about

802
00:35:05,760 --> 00:35:10,680
Speaker 1: it is the fact that, to your point, you're helping

803
00:35:10,719 --> 00:35:15,919
Speaker 1: to surface real conversations because there's this really weird, sort

804
00:35:15,920 --> 00:35:19,919
Speaker 1: of extreme spectrum where women and sex are concerned most

805
00:35:19,920 --> 00:35:22,960
Speaker 1: of the time and you're either like a frigid bitch virgin,

806
00:35:24,000 --> 00:35:27,640
Speaker 1: or you're if you're sexually active in any way, shape

807
00:35:27,719 --> 00:35:29,760
Speaker 1: or form, then you're getting slut shamed.

808
00:35:29,920 --> 00:35:32,800
Speaker 3: It's like the world doesn't want women to be nuanced,

809
00:35:33,040 --> 00:35:35,640
Speaker 3: but we're incredibly nuanced, and so we try to talk

810
00:35:35,640 --> 00:35:39,640
Speaker 3: about those nuances in this film a lot. But yeah,

811
00:35:39,680 --> 00:35:41,880
Speaker 3: I just you know, it's crazy, and I'll be vulnerable

812
00:35:41,920 --> 00:35:43,759
Speaker 3: and tell you I used to be so awkward even

813
00:35:43,800 --> 00:35:45,800
Speaker 3: saying the word sex, saying the word penis, saying the words,

814
00:35:45,840 --> 00:35:47,960
Speaker 3: saying any of this. I would never grew up talking

815
00:35:47,960 --> 00:35:49,520
Speaker 3: like this, And then I did the movie, and I

816
00:35:49,560 --> 00:35:51,120
Speaker 3: never got the talk growing up. Me and my mom

817
00:35:51,160 --> 00:35:53,000
Speaker 3: had to talk for the first time during this movie.

818
00:35:53,520 --> 00:35:55,799
Speaker 3: She made sex jokes on set. For the first time

819
00:35:55,840 --> 00:35:58,960
Speaker 3: in my life, she made sex jokes on set. So

820
00:35:59,000 --> 00:36:01,080
Speaker 3: it has healed me and my mom in a way.

821
00:36:01,120 --> 00:36:02,400
Speaker 3: So I'm like, if that has happened for me. I

822
00:36:02,440 --> 00:36:04,480
Speaker 3: cannot wait for views, and I'll tell you when it premiered.

823
00:36:04,520 --> 00:36:07,000
Speaker 3: It south By Southwest two years ago, I did this

824
00:36:07,040 --> 00:36:09,120
Speaker 3: thing where I handed out sex toys and vibrators at

825
00:36:09,120 --> 00:36:10,399
Speaker 3: the screening. I was like, you get a sex toy,

826
00:36:10,400 --> 00:36:11,880
Speaker 3: and you get a sex toy. And at the end

827
00:36:11,880 --> 00:36:14,080
Speaker 3: of a screening, I kid you not. An older uncle

828
00:36:14,120 --> 00:36:15,279
Speaker 3: and auntie came up to me and I was like,

829
00:36:15,280 --> 00:36:16,640
Speaker 3: oh my god, this is gonna be bad, and they

830
00:36:16,640 --> 00:36:16,960
Speaker 3: were like.

831
00:36:17,560 --> 00:36:19,600
Speaker 2: Love the movie, thanks so much for our new sex toy.

832
00:36:19,640 --> 00:36:23,840
Speaker 3: And I was like, wow, you're sem But I was like,

833
00:36:23,920 --> 00:36:25,719
Speaker 3: what I would have never thought that it would have

834
00:36:25,760 --> 00:36:27,680
Speaker 3: been the case, But yeah, I think I at the

835
00:36:27,800 --> 00:36:30,000
Speaker 3: very least, I really hope it just helps people have

836
00:36:30,040 --> 00:36:33,319
Speaker 3: the conversation and feel more comfortable having the conversation and

837
00:36:33,400 --> 00:36:38,359
Speaker 3: just being comfortable learning what they like and being giving

838
00:36:38,360 --> 00:36:40,040
Speaker 3: themselves permission to be like I like this, I don't

839
00:36:40,120 --> 00:36:41,560
Speaker 3: like this, and I'm allowed to feel this way, and

840
00:36:41,560 --> 00:36:42,719
Speaker 3: I don't have to feel this way.

841
00:36:42,719 --> 00:36:43,920
Speaker 2: I don't have to feel shame around this.

842
00:36:44,000 --> 00:36:47,080
Speaker 3: Like for every girl or woman that has just been

843
00:36:47,200 --> 00:36:50,080
Speaker 3: stressed about sex in any capacity, whether it's like oh

844
00:36:50,120 --> 00:36:51,839
Speaker 3: my god, my boyfriend expects this or like, I don't

845
00:36:51,840 --> 00:36:53,520
Speaker 3: know if I'm straight or I don't know. This is

846
00:36:53,520 --> 00:36:55,680
Speaker 3: a love letter to them for any woman who's been

847
00:36:55,840 --> 00:36:58,680
Speaker 3: in the bathroom stressed the moments before, being like, I

848
00:36:58,760 --> 00:36:59,680
Speaker 3: don't know what I'm doing.

849
00:36:59,760 --> 00:37:00,279
Speaker 2: This is for you.

850
00:37:00,360 --> 00:37:02,239
Speaker 1: Well, and by the way, I think that's everyone.

851
00:37:02,480 --> 00:37:04,000
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm I'm.

852
00:37:03,840 --> 00:37:07,120
Speaker 1: Working on it. I'm forty three years old. And when

853
00:37:07,160 --> 00:37:09,840
Speaker 1: I'm like, this is what's happening, forties are lit. Everyone

854
00:37:09,960 --> 00:37:12,359
Speaker 1: was right. And when I'm listing off all the things

855
00:37:12,360 --> 00:37:13,960
Speaker 1: that are great and I'm like, I'm having the best

856
00:37:13,960 --> 00:37:16,880
Speaker 1: sex of my life, I feel myself blush and then

857
00:37:16,920 --> 00:37:18,920
Speaker 1: I go, should I have said that? And so I

858
00:37:19,000 --> 00:37:21,120
Speaker 1: keep repeating it because I'm trying to get over the

859
00:37:21,120 --> 00:37:23,360
Speaker 1: feeling of should I have said that? Yeah?

860
00:37:23,400 --> 00:37:26,399
Speaker 2: And you absolutely should have said it again. Sophia Bush

861
00:37:26,480 --> 00:37:28,600
Speaker 2: is having the best sex of her life. You heard

862
00:37:28,600 --> 00:37:30,279
Speaker 2: it here. Yeah, this is the.

863
00:37:30,239 --> 00:37:33,000
Speaker 3: Clip, editors, if you want the viral clip for the socials, Right,

864
00:37:33,120 --> 00:37:35,279
Speaker 3: Sophia Bush is having the best sex of her life,

865
00:37:35,320 --> 00:37:37,640
Speaker 3: and you heard it here. And I'm trying to get

866
00:37:37,680 --> 00:37:39,759
Speaker 3: like her and I'm trying to catch up to her.

867
00:37:39,800 --> 00:37:41,359
Speaker 2: One of us is having the best seas of her

868
00:37:41,480 --> 00:37:42,759
Speaker 2: One of us is trying to catch him.

869
00:37:42,840 --> 00:37:44,640
Speaker 1: Listen, we're going to talk about.

870
00:37:44,440 --> 00:37:45,520
Speaker 2: That well FaceTime later.

871
00:37:45,680 --> 00:37:47,960
Speaker 3: Yes, yeah, But I like what you're saying, because, to

872
00:37:48,080 --> 00:37:50,000
Speaker 3: be honest, it's easy to talk about.

873
00:37:50,200 --> 00:37:51,200
Speaker 2: But I do catch.

874
00:37:51,000 --> 00:37:54,239
Speaker 3: Myself throughout the day being like, ah, that's shame. You're

875
00:37:54,239 --> 00:37:56,640
Speaker 3: doing a shame thing. You're feeling nervous that you said that.

876
00:37:56,840 --> 00:37:58,200
Speaker 3: You don't want to be picked up with the vibe

877
00:37:58,280 --> 00:38:00,000
Speaker 3: or whatever it is. And I think that's the challenge.

878
00:38:00,239 --> 00:38:02,520
Speaker 3: It's the mental gymnastics of catching ourselves to be like,

879
00:38:02,680 --> 00:38:04,520
Speaker 3: I am operating from a place of shame, and how

880
00:38:04,520 --> 00:38:06,600
Speaker 3: can I gently not be mad at myself?

881
00:38:06,640 --> 00:38:07,759
Speaker 2: Because there's a reason that's there.

882
00:38:07,800 --> 00:38:10,640
Speaker 3: We've been taught the shame totally to gracefully unlearn it

883
00:38:10,920 --> 00:38:12,960
Speaker 3: and just make choices that are more liberating.

884
00:38:13,080 --> 00:38:16,400
Speaker 1: What's the journal prompt for that? For liberation and unlearning shame?

885
00:38:16,680 --> 00:38:18,400
Speaker 3: Okay, for me, I'll tell you what it is for me.

886
00:38:18,680 --> 00:38:22,279
Speaker 3: Shame for me is associated with safety. I think we

887
00:38:22,320 --> 00:38:25,000
Speaker 3: are shamed to a place of like, if I operate

888
00:38:25,040 --> 00:38:26,839
Speaker 3: in this way, I'll be safe, I'll be accepted, I'll

889
00:38:26,880 --> 00:38:28,600
Speaker 3: be safe, I will not be shunned. So I will

890
00:38:28,640 --> 00:38:30,560
Speaker 3: let shame take me to a place of safety. But

891
00:38:30,640 --> 00:38:33,480
Speaker 3: if I can convince myself I'm safe and shameless at

892
00:38:33,480 --> 00:38:35,440
Speaker 3: the same time, then that's a good place. So I

893
00:38:35,440 --> 00:38:37,520
Speaker 3: do a lot of journal prompts that I am safe.

894
00:38:37,560 --> 00:38:38,880
Speaker 3: I am safe in my body, I am safe in

895
00:38:38,920 --> 00:38:41,920
Speaker 3: this relationship. I am safe regardless of what this person thinks.

896
00:38:42,040 --> 00:38:45,200
Speaker 3: A lot of safety prompts because when you feel safe,

897
00:38:45,280 --> 00:38:48,680
Speaker 3: I feel like you're less controlled by shame. Yeah, you know,

898
00:38:48,760 --> 00:38:50,960
Speaker 3: shame is just all about control, That's all it is.

899
00:38:51,200 --> 00:38:57,200
Speaker 1: Well and shame, fear, anxiety, all of it contracts. And

900
00:38:57,280 --> 00:38:59,960
Speaker 1: really what happens when you contract is you get smaller, right,

901
00:39:00,239 --> 00:39:02,799
Speaker 1: And society teaches women that they are safe if they

902
00:39:02,800 --> 00:39:03,280
Speaker 1: are small.

903
00:39:03,360 --> 00:39:05,439
Speaker 3: So one is safety. I'll tell you another one, which

904
00:39:05,480 --> 00:39:09,319
Speaker 3: is I do this often again, pragmatic, pragmatically. In terms

905
00:39:09,360 --> 00:39:11,960
Speaker 3: of liberation, I think another big thing to get rid

906
00:39:11,960 --> 00:39:14,000
Speaker 3: of chamege is liberation just freedom of choice, to be

907
00:39:14,000 --> 00:39:14,440
Speaker 3: able to.

908
00:39:14,560 --> 00:39:16,120
Speaker 2: Do whatever feels right for me.

909
00:39:16,480 --> 00:39:18,840
Speaker 3: And so very often when I'm making a choice about anything,

910
00:39:18,840 --> 00:39:21,000
Speaker 3: it could be what I'm doing tonight. Do I want

911
00:39:21,000 --> 00:39:22,360
Speaker 3: to go on this trip? Do I want to go

912
00:39:22,360 --> 00:39:24,000
Speaker 3: to this friend's house? Is it about sex?

913
00:39:24,000 --> 00:39:24,280
Speaker 2: Whatever?

914
00:39:24,360 --> 00:39:26,319
Speaker 3: I will be like, I want you to list tot

915
00:39:26,360 --> 00:39:30,239
Speaker 3: literally every possible option you have, even if it's so

916
00:39:30,360 --> 00:39:32,879
Speaker 3: far fetched. So example, this morning, I was like, I'm

917
00:39:32,960 --> 00:39:36,719
Speaker 3: really tired, what are all of my options? Okay, you

918
00:39:36,719 --> 00:39:39,120
Speaker 3: could go do Sophia's podcast. You could completely cancel on

919
00:39:39,120 --> 00:39:40,600
Speaker 3: her and go to Hawaii right now if you wanted to.

920
00:39:40,960 --> 00:39:42,919
Speaker 3: You could go to the club right now. You could

921
00:39:42,960 --> 00:39:44,600
Speaker 3: go smoke a j if you want to smoke a J.

922
00:39:44,800 --> 00:39:48,560
Speaker 3: You could do whatever. List all the options, and then

923
00:39:48,640 --> 00:39:50,799
Speaker 3: based on that, be like, and I'm deciding to do this,

924
00:39:50,960 --> 00:39:53,640
Speaker 3: just to remind yourself that you actually have the freedom

925
00:39:53,680 --> 00:39:56,120
Speaker 3: to do whatever the hell you want. Yes, I have

926
00:39:56,120 --> 00:39:58,920
Speaker 3: a challenge for all the listeners here. Oh some days

927
00:39:59,719 --> 00:40:01,520
Speaker 3: and pick a day. Can't be every day, but some

928
00:40:01,600 --> 00:40:04,200
Speaker 3: days I will journal in the morning, I'll say today,

929
00:40:04,239 --> 00:40:06,360
Speaker 3: my only intention is you can operate from a lot

930
00:40:06,400 --> 00:40:08,160
Speaker 3: of different places. You can operate from a place of fear,

931
00:40:08,280 --> 00:40:09,799
Speaker 3: you can operate from a place of stress. You can

932
00:40:09,840 --> 00:40:12,840
Speaker 3: operate from this anxiety on a select day, I challenge

933
00:40:12,840 --> 00:40:14,520
Speaker 3: you, if you haven't done yet, to be like today. My

934
00:40:14,640 --> 00:40:17,040
Speaker 3: only goal is to operate out of a place of

935
00:40:17,719 --> 00:40:21,200
Speaker 3: what do I actually want? That is the only filter

936
00:40:21,280 --> 00:40:24,040
Speaker 3: for the decisions you make that day. Don't pick a Saturday,

937
00:40:24,120 --> 00:40:26,839
Speaker 3: pick a Sunday. Like today, I'm only doing the things

938
00:40:26,920 --> 00:40:29,480
Speaker 3: I genuinely, and you're gonna find that you do things

939
00:40:29,480 --> 00:40:31,160
Speaker 3: that have habited sometimes that you actually don't even want

940
00:40:31,160 --> 00:40:33,200
Speaker 3: to do totally. But if you just ask yourself, what

941
00:40:33,239 --> 00:40:36,200
Speaker 3: do I actually want to do today? You learn a

942
00:40:36,239 --> 00:40:38,719
Speaker 3: lot about yourself, you really do, because most of the

943
00:40:38,760 --> 00:40:40,239
Speaker 3: things we do in today are the things we think

944
00:40:40,280 --> 00:40:42,040
Speaker 3: we have to do, not the things that actually fill us.

945
00:40:42,200 --> 00:40:44,640
Speaker 1: Yes, because we feel obligated.

946
00:40:46,360 --> 00:40:48,799
Speaker 2: This is therapy. I cancel your session for after this.

947
00:40:48,840 --> 00:40:59,600
Speaker 1: You don't need it, Okay, And now for our sponsors. Now, look,

948
00:40:59,640 --> 00:41:01,960
Speaker 1: see this is where I'm like, I have questions for you,

949
00:41:02,000 --> 00:41:05,399
Speaker 1: but those are for a FaceTime. So I'm looking at

950
00:41:05,400 --> 00:41:10,520
Speaker 1: my doc going, what would I like to discuss with you?

951
00:41:11,560 --> 00:41:11,840
Speaker 3: Okay?

952
00:41:13,719 --> 00:41:17,560
Speaker 1: This really, I think actually encapsulates the big conversation about

953
00:41:18,640 --> 00:41:21,040
Speaker 1: how society does and doesn't make space for us, what

954
00:41:21,120 --> 00:41:22,839
Speaker 1: we have to claim, what we have to fight for,

955
00:41:24,000 --> 00:41:29,600
Speaker 1: how I think storytelling can help us do that. We've

956
00:41:29,600 --> 00:41:33,560
Speaker 1: talked a lot in so many arenas about representation, but

957
00:41:35,600 --> 00:41:38,240
Speaker 1: the word almost feels trite to me now. It feels

958
00:41:38,320 --> 00:41:41,640
Speaker 1: kind of like a token rather than a shift, because

959
00:41:41,640 --> 00:41:44,000
Speaker 1: it isn't enough to just get in the room. It

960
00:41:44,040 --> 00:41:46,800
Speaker 1: isn't enough to just get a seat at the table.

961
00:41:47,880 --> 00:41:50,080
Speaker 1: So when you think about that, when you think about

962
00:41:50,239 --> 00:41:53,680
Speaker 1: not getting a seat at the table, building a new table, like,

963
00:41:54,800 --> 00:41:58,640
Speaker 1: what does your ideal table look like? Because you've built

964
00:41:58,680 --> 00:42:02,839
Speaker 1: a pretty big one so far, but I'm curious what

965
00:42:03,400 --> 00:42:05,719
Speaker 1: the journey of that looks like, what the expansion of

966
00:42:05,760 --> 00:42:06,640
Speaker 1: that looks like for you.

967
00:42:07,160 --> 00:42:09,160
Speaker 3: Yeah. So the reason I'm so proud of doing it

968
00:42:09,200 --> 00:42:11,920
Speaker 3: is it's my production company's first film, actually, and that

969
00:42:12,120 --> 00:42:13,040
Speaker 3: is my start.

970
00:42:12,760 --> 00:42:13,600
Speaker 2: Of building a table.

971
00:42:14,120 --> 00:42:17,520
Speaker 3: And so part of building the table is making sure

972
00:42:17,560 --> 00:42:20,040
Speaker 3: that the stories that the world needs, that are actual,

973
00:42:20,080 --> 00:42:23,160
Speaker 3: diverse stories, get to be told by those people in

974
00:42:23,280 --> 00:42:26,239
Speaker 3: unfiltered ways. Because I feel like one of the things

975
00:42:26,280 --> 00:42:28,800
Speaker 3: that drives me crazy about Hollywood and probably all industries,

976
00:42:28,840 --> 00:42:31,280
Speaker 3: but Hollywood in general, it's supposed to be creative industry,

977
00:42:31,480 --> 00:42:34,160
Speaker 3: but behind the scenes it is the least creative space ever.

978
00:42:34,520 --> 00:42:37,359
Speaker 3: They want to put people in boxes. People who aren't

979
00:42:37,360 --> 00:42:39,920
Speaker 3: creatives are giving notes on creative projects because they are.

980
00:42:39,960 --> 00:42:42,319
Speaker 3: Their job is to give notes on creative projects. It's

981
00:42:42,600 --> 00:42:46,080
Speaker 3: we want unique points of view and unique characters but

982
00:42:46,120 --> 00:42:47,600
Speaker 3: we're gonna give you all these notes.

983
00:42:47,400 --> 00:42:49,920
Speaker 2: To turn them into a generic, water down version of that. Yes,

984
00:42:50,000 --> 00:42:51,560
Speaker 2: so there's a lot of things that just do.

985
00:42:51,480 --> 00:42:53,400
Speaker 3: Not work for me, and so my table is throwing

986
00:42:53,440 --> 00:42:55,920
Speaker 3: all that out the window. Is I want stories to

987
00:42:55,960 --> 00:42:58,719
Speaker 3: be told from the people experiencing those stories, and I

988
00:42:58,760 --> 00:43:02,000
Speaker 3: want to create a system where just because it's how

989
00:43:02,000 --> 00:43:04,680
Speaker 3: it's been done, I don't want to. I don't want

990
00:43:04,760 --> 00:43:09,640
Speaker 3: notes that make my stories more palatable for people because

991
00:43:09,640 --> 00:43:10,520
Speaker 3: they don't have that experience.

992
00:43:10,520 --> 00:43:12,239
Speaker 2: Like that's not okay with me. Like maybe you could

993
00:43:12,280 --> 00:43:13,919
Speaker 2: learn something new if you see my point of view.

994
00:43:13,920 --> 00:43:16,400
Speaker 1: But also it doesn't even have to be that deep.

995
00:43:16,840 --> 00:43:19,120
Speaker 1: It's not like you're gonna learn something new. It's it's

996
00:43:19,160 --> 00:43:22,600
Speaker 1: a real point of view, and so you'll relate to it. Also,

997
00:43:22,640 --> 00:43:25,960
Speaker 1: But if it isn't your story, because it's specific, it

998
00:43:26,000 --> 00:43:29,280
Speaker 1: will remind you of something you've seen or known or someone.

999
00:43:29,880 --> 00:43:34,160
Speaker 1: And if it becomes vanilla, it's gonna be the like

1000
00:43:34,520 --> 00:43:36,719
Speaker 1: peer one that you walk into and go I don't

1001
00:43:36,760 --> 00:43:38,600
Speaker 1: want any of this in my house and walk right

1002
00:43:38,640 --> 00:43:40,920
Speaker 1: back out right. It has to have a point of

1003
00:43:41,000 --> 00:43:42,440
Speaker 1: view otherwise it isn't special.

1004
00:43:42,520 --> 00:43:43,840
Speaker 2: And those point of views can vary.

1005
00:43:44,080 --> 00:43:46,080
Speaker 3: We've seen one point of view for a real long time,

1006
00:43:46,200 --> 00:43:48,120
Speaker 3: and it's like we need to see other parade. Yes,

1007
00:43:48,480 --> 00:43:52,520
Speaker 3: I will also just say forget spirituality, forget all the stuff. Economically,

1008
00:43:53,000 --> 00:43:56,680
Speaker 3: diversity is profitable. We've seen it time and time again.

1009
00:43:57,000 --> 00:43:58,960
Speaker 3: And I feel like, what drives me crazy about the

1010
00:43:59,000 --> 00:44:01,520
Speaker 3: other table, the one that's sucks is that every time

1011
00:44:01,560 --> 00:44:04,200
Speaker 3: diversity does really well, it's an exception. The Barbie movie,

1012
00:44:04,239 --> 00:44:08,359
Speaker 3: Black Panther, Sinners. There's so many the exception exceptions. They're like, no, wow, No,

1013
00:44:08,480 --> 00:44:10,480
Speaker 3: it's people want divers If you look at the box

1014
00:44:10,480 --> 00:44:12,719
Speaker 3: office numbers, people the people that go to a movie

1015
00:44:12,800 --> 00:44:15,239
Speaker 3: theater are mostly people of color. They're the ones that

1016
00:44:15,280 --> 00:44:18,160
Speaker 3: are driving the box office. So it's like, stop ignoring

1017
00:44:18,280 --> 00:44:19,680
Speaker 3: the stats, stop ignoring the data.

1018
00:44:19,760 --> 00:44:21,000
Speaker 2: Stop even if.

1019
00:44:20,920 --> 00:44:24,440
Speaker 3: You don't care about just being a good person that

1020
00:44:24,480 --> 00:44:25,320
Speaker 3: wants different.

1021
00:44:25,080 --> 00:44:28,520
Speaker 2: Stories to exists, the business, look at the business of

1022
00:44:28,680 --> 00:44:30,799
Speaker 2: it alone. And so that's what my table looks like.

1023
00:44:30,840 --> 00:44:33,240
Speaker 3: And looking at the actual stats and business and letting

1024
00:44:33,280 --> 00:44:35,320
Speaker 3: stories be told from the people that experience those stories.

1025
00:44:35,760 --> 00:44:38,040
Speaker 3: I don't believe in this filter of like our stories

1026
00:44:38,080 --> 00:44:40,239
Speaker 3: need to go through this system of people that think

1027
00:44:40,239 --> 00:44:41,560
Speaker 3: they know better they're.

1028
00:44:41,320 --> 00:44:43,640
Speaker 2: Making it up. Listen, I'm not saying replaced. I'm saying

1029
00:44:43,640 --> 00:44:45,719
Speaker 2: there's room for all stories. There's room for all. So

1030
00:44:45,760 --> 00:44:49,440
Speaker 2: we got to stop playing ourselves. It's so tired that part.

1031
00:44:49,520 --> 00:44:53,600
Speaker 1: And that's the thing. Much like we all nobody wants

1032
00:44:53,600 --> 00:44:56,200
Speaker 1: to go to the same restaurant every Friday night, nobody

1033
00:44:56,200 --> 00:44:58,840
Speaker 1: wants to see the same movie every Friday night. Like,

1034
00:44:59,120 --> 00:45:02,120
Speaker 1: give us some variety so we can enjoy ourselves. And

1035
00:45:02,160 --> 00:45:05,120
Speaker 1: to your point, even if you're not caught up on

1036
00:45:05,160 --> 00:45:10,640
Speaker 1: the on the moral core of equity, look at the math.

1037
00:45:11,719 --> 00:45:14,440
Speaker 1: I talk about that in terms of like activism, in

1038
00:45:14,520 --> 00:45:17,720
Speaker 1: terms of investing in women's sports, in terms of things

1039
00:45:17,760 --> 00:45:20,520
Speaker 1: like making film and television. When the math and the

1040
00:45:20,560 --> 00:45:25,919
Speaker 1: morals meet, it's literally undeniable. There's only a very niche

1041
00:45:25,960 --> 00:45:28,560
Speaker 1: group of people trying to deny what's right in front

1042
00:45:28,600 --> 00:45:34,759
Speaker 1: of their vases. So on that subject matter, this might

1043
00:45:34,800 --> 00:45:38,720
Speaker 1: be your first, uh, your first zone of the table

1044
00:45:38,800 --> 00:45:42,800
Speaker 1: for film, but you've been building big tables in sport,

1045
00:45:43,640 --> 00:45:47,560
Speaker 1: in content creation, as a writer, as a director, as

1046
00:45:47,600 --> 00:45:51,640
Speaker 1: an investor, like talk to us about the thesis of

1047
00:45:51,760 --> 00:45:56,959
Speaker 1: Unicorn Island. And for listeners that hear this and say

1048
00:45:57,040 --> 00:45:59,200
Speaker 1: I want to be involved in something like that.

1049
00:46:00,560 --> 00:46:01,240
Speaker 2: Where do they?

1050
00:46:01,360 --> 00:46:04,080
Speaker 3: Unicorn Island is my company name because I'm an adult

1051
00:46:04,080 --> 00:46:05,040
Speaker 3: and I can call it whatever I want.

1052
00:46:05,160 --> 00:46:07,120
Speaker 2: Yeah, Okay, I can call you akurrentline if I want,

1053
00:46:07,120 --> 00:46:08,839
Speaker 2: and that's why I do. So it's called Unicorn Island.

1054
00:46:08,880 --> 00:46:10,719
Speaker 3: It has two parts, you know, Caren Island Productions, which

1055
00:46:10,760 --> 00:46:12,480
Speaker 3: is again going back to my film, but then there's

1056
00:46:12,560 --> 00:46:15,319
Speaker 3: Unocurn Island Fund, which is the charitable part of it.

1057
00:46:15,600 --> 00:46:17,520
Speaker 3: And the thesis is the same across both, which is

1058
00:46:17,560 --> 00:46:22,200
Speaker 3: the belief that storytelling can impact culture and more specifically,

1059
00:46:22,440 --> 00:46:24,879
Speaker 3: that you can use storytelling to change the way girls

1060
00:46:24,920 --> 00:46:28,040
Speaker 3: and women are valued. So I'm all, my entire life

1061
00:46:28,040 --> 00:46:31,080
Speaker 3: mission is girls and women. That is the chip on

1062
00:46:31,120 --> 00:46:32,600
Speaker 3: my shoulder. That is the thing that keeps me up

1063
00:46:32,600 --> 00:46:34,160
Speaker 3: at night, that wakes me up in the morning.

1064
00:46:34,320 --> 00:46:36,319
Speaker 2: Girls and women. We have lots of.

1065
00:46:36,239 --> 00:46:38,239
Speaker 3: Trauma to justify why that is. But you can watch

1066
00:46:38,239 --> 00:46:39,560
Speaker 3: my ted talk if you want to have more on that.

1067
00:46:39,600 --> 00:46:42,000
Speaker 3: But I just really believe that one of the greatest

1068
00:46:42,000 --> 00:46:44,160
Speaker 3: injustices is the fact that fifty percent of the world

1069
00:46:44,160 --> 00:46:47,239
Speaker 3: population doesn't get the opportunity, doesn't have the rights. Isn't

1070
00:46:47,280 --> 00:46:51,000
Speaker 3: it the education It makes going back to math, not mathing.

1071
00:46:51,480 --> 00:46:56,040
Speaker 3: The human race is literally discrediting fifty percent of their team.

1072
00:46:56,440 --> 00:46:57,960
Speaker 3: And I don't know, if you checked, the world is

1073
00:46:58,000 --> 00:46:58,920
Speaker 3: in a pretty bad place.

1074
00:46:59,040 --> 00:47:00,400
Speaker 1: Yeah, it turned out it is not working out.

1075
00:47:00,400 --> 00:47:02,239
Speaker 3: But what I'm saying in terms of climate, in terms

1076
00:47:02,280 --> 00:47:04,840
Speaker 3: of poverty, of so many things, that makes no sense

1077
00:47:04,960 --> 00:47:07,680
Speaker 3: no matter how you look at it. To not give

1078
00:47:07,760 --> 00:47:10,920
Speaker 3: girls and women the opportunities in education and rights and

1079
00:47:11,000 --> 00:47:12,840
Speaker 3: resources they need, it makes no sense.

1080
00:47:12,880 --> 00:47:13,880
Speaker 2: It hurts everyone.

1081
00:47:14,200 --> 00:47:17,560
Speaker 3: And so Island is all about how do we change

1082
00:47:17,600 --> 00:47:19,640
Speaker 3: the culture around our girls and women are treated. And

1083
00:47:19,640 --> 00:47:22,200
Speaker 3: why I emphasize culture is because and we particularly do

1084
00:47:22,280 --> 00:47:25,319
Speaker 3: this through deweaponizing shame. That's why I'm so big on shame,

1085
00:47:25,560 --> 00:47:27,480
Speaker 3: because it's easy to give money to causes. And the

1086
00:47:27,480 --> 00:47:29,680
Speaker 3: best example I give is in so many places around

1087
00:47:29,680 --> 00:47:32,560
Speaker 3: the world. It's not that the school doesn't exist, it's

1088
00:47:32,560 --> 00:47:34,600
Speaker 3: not that the road doesn't exist to the school. It's

1089
00:47:34,640 --> 00:47:37,160
Speaker 3: not that the bus doesn't exist. It's that a father

1090
00:47:37,239 --> 00:47:39,879
Speaker 3: believes his daughter should not be sent to school. Yes, right,

1091
00:47:39,920 --> 00:47:43,080
Speaker 3: that is the problem. You can't throw money at that

1092
00:47:43,160 --> 00:47:45,040
Speaker 3: particular problem. You can throw it at all the other

1093
00:47:45,080 --> 00:47:48,640
Speaker 3: pieces of that equation. But that problem gets changed by culture.

1094
00:47:49,080 --> 00:47:52,040
Speaker 3: That problem gets changed by changing that dad's mind and

1095
00:47:52,080 --> 00:47:54,120
Speaker 3: empowering that young girl to be able to speak up

1096
00:47:54,239 --> 00:47:55,920
Speaker 3: and speak out and be safe in doing so.

1097
00:47:56,440 --> 00:47:57,839
Speaker 2: And how do you do that? Now?

1098
00:47:57,840 --> 00:48:01,400
Speaker 3: I've gone across different villages in Indian, different cities in India, being.

1099
00:48:01,239 --> 00:48:02,240
Speaker 2: Like, what do you watch?

1100
00:48:02,280 --> 00:48:04,120
Speaker 3: Where do you get your stories from? Where do you

1101
00:48:04,120 --> 00:48:06,560
Speaker 3: get your ideas from? And it's always a story in

1102
00:48:06,600 --> 00:48:10,279
Speaker 3: some capacity. There's actually a study done in one rule

1103
00:48:10,400 --> 00:48:12,080
Speaker 3: village in India which was really really cool. There was

1104
00:48:12,120 --> 00:48:14,719
Speaker 3: an Indian soap opera that was like just two seasons long,

1105
00:48:14,760 --> 00:48:18,480
Speaker 3: and they tracked people's opinions about child marriage and that

1106
00:48:18,560 --> 00:48:20,239
Speaker 3: village of these two seasons of the soap opera, and

1107
00:48:20,280 --> 00:48:22,200
Speaker 3: the soap opera was very simple. It just had a

1108
00:48:22,239 --> 00:48:24,320
Speaker 3: woman who got married later in life, like her parents

1109
00:48:24,320 --> 00:48:25,880
Speaker 3: want her to get married younger, and through the season

1110
00:48:25,880 --> 00:48:28,520
Speaker 3: you see her parents be okay with her getting married older.

1111
00:48:29,320 --> 00:48:33,760
Speaker 3: And in that village, literally the rate of girls getting

1112
00:48:33,760 --> 00:48:36,759
Speaker 3: married got older just through that soap opera. So you

1113
00:48:36,880 --> 00:48:40,280
Speaker 3: see the direct correlation between stories and movies and actors

1114
00:48:40,280 --> 00:48:40,840
Speaker 3: and actors and.

1115
00:48:40,840 --> 00:48:43,040
Speaker 2: All these things. Yeah, real life, and so that's what

1116
00:48:43,040 --> 00:48:43,200
Speaker 2: you know.

1117
00:48:43,280 --> 00:48:45,759
Speaker 3: Crolean's all about you know, I have conversations with a

1118
00:48:45,760 --> 00:48:48,719
Speaker 3: lot of influential people about taboo subjects and hopes that

1119
00:48:48,719 --> 00:48:50,440
Speaker 3: people can watch it and be like, oh, I cannot

1120
00:48:50,440 --> 00:48:52,640
Speaker 3: open up about these subjects, whether it's sex, whether it's

1121
00:48:52,680 --> 00:48:56,880
Speaker 3: mental health, whether it's about abuse, domestic violence, whatever. Maybe

1122
00:48:57,040 --> 00:48:58,920
Speaker 3: that's one way we do it, But doing it is

1123
00:48:58,960 --> 00:49:01,160
Speaker 3: just the tip of the iceberg of what we're trying

1124
00:49:01,200 --> 00:49:03,400
Speaker 3: to do in terms of, like, we want to change

1125
00:49:03,440 --> 00:49:06,480
Speaker 3: the way the world values girls and women. Yes, in

1126
00:49:06,520 --> 00:49:07,959
Speaker 3: a really, really big, real way.

1127
00:49:08,120 --> 00:49:11,480
Speaker 1: I love that. Yeah, And to your point, telling people's

1128
00:49:11,520 --> 00:49:15,279
Speaker 1: stories and centering them is relevant to everyone. I mean,

1129
00:49:15,320 --> 00:49:17,520
Speaker 1: you look at you look at the data around the

1130
00:49:17,520 --> 00:49:22,200
Speaker 1: way that in this country opinions about marriage equality change

1131
00:49:22,440 --> 00:49:24,200
Speaker 1: during the course of Will and Grace being on t

1132
00:49:25,120 --> 00:49:26,440
Speaker 1: because people went, oh.

1133
00:49:26,280 --> 00:49:29,880
Speaker 2: I like that guy, Yeah, he's great, Totally.

1134
00:49:29,920 --> 00:49:32,560
Speaker 1: He shouldn't be denied the right to be in a

1135
00:49:32,600 --> 00:49:35,400
Speaker 1: hospital with his spouse, or the right to have a

1136
00:49:35,400 --> 00:49:39,040
Speaker 1: spouse at all, Like why? And I think it's a

1137
00:49:39,080 --> 00:49:41,560
Speaker 1: really important thing. You know, even as we look around

1138
00:49:41,600 --> 00:49:45,920
Speaker 1: the country we live in now, men's rights don't vary

1139
00:49:45,960 --> 00:49:49,200
Speaker 1: from state to state, but women's do correct and they're

1140
00:49:49,200 --> 00:49:51,959
Speaker 1: trying to make queer people's rights vary from state to state.

1141
00:49:52,400 --> 00:49:56,480
Speaker 1: And that's not America. That's not freedom, that's not the

1142
00:49:56,560 --> 00:50:02,960
Speaker 1: founding Documents of equality. That's that's a system that is

1143
00:50:03,040 --> 00:50:08,200
Speaker 1: at its core unjust. And if we can tell stories

1144
00:50:08,800 --> 00:50:13,480
Speaker 1: that don't rile everybody up on the quick political factoid,

1145
00:50:13,520 --> 00:50:16,280
Speaker 1: but instead remind people that their neighbors are good people,

1146
00:50:17,160 --> 00:50:20,600
Speaker 1: whether they're sons or daughters, Getty here straight, like, it's

1147
00:50:20,680 --> 00:50:26,719
Speaker 1: incredibly important, I think, especially to be the antidote to

1148
00:50:26,840 --> 00:50:30,080
Speaker 1: some of this kind of poison for profit that we

1149
00:50:30,160 --> 00:50:33,240
Speaker 1: see in the clickbait and the rage bait.

1150
00:50:33,360 --> 00:50:35,440
Speaker 3: Right now, what's you like, demo? If people listen to

1151
00:50:35,520 --> 00:50:37,120
Speaker 3: this majority women, is it men?

1152
00:50:37,360 --> 00:50:37,759
Speaker 2: Would you know?

1153
00:50:38,040 --> 00:50:40,680
Speaker 1: I mean, it's definitely a majority women on this show.

1154
00:50:41,719 --> 00:50:43,759
Speaker 1: But I do really like when I get when I

1155
00:50:43,800 --> 00:50:45,399
Speaker 1: get the boys that are like, oh, I just love

1156
00:50:45,440 --> 00:50:49,440
Speaker 1: the podcast. And now it's also really cute because I

1157
00:50:49,520 --> 00:50:52,960
Speaker 1: we've been on long enough that I get dads that

1158
00:50:53,000 --> 00:50:56,160
Speaker 1: are like, my daughter started putting your podcast on in

1159
00:50:56,160 --> 00:50:59,000
Speaker 1: the car. Now she gets mad when I listen to

1160
00:50:59,000 --> 00:51:02,759
Speaker 1: episodes before she's and it's like, I love that this

1161
00:51:02,920 --> 00:51:03,640
Speaker 1: sweet dad.

1162
00:51:03,760 --> 00:51:06,160
Speaker 3: Tell you the reason I ask is because I feel

1163
00:51:06,160 --> 00:51:07,839
Speaker 3: like a lot of times, listen, I've been talking about

1164
00:51:07,880 --> 00:51:10,160
Speaker 3: gender equality and gender equity for a long time, and

1165
00:51:10,200 --> 00:51:12,440
Speaker 3: I know sometimes the immediate response from a lot of

1166
00:51:12,480 --> 00:51:13,799
Speaker 3: men is like an eye roll, to be like, oh

1167
00:51:13,800 --> 00:51:15,920
Speaker 3: my god, this again you use the gender card. I

1168
00:51:16,000 --> 00:51:18,640
Speaker 3: really do feel like it's not known enough all the

1169
00:51:18,640 --> 00:51:23,400
Speaker 3: negative ways men are impacted by gender inequity and the patriarchy.

1170
00:51:23,520 --> 00:51:25,319
Speaker 3: And as if you're a man listening to this, or

1171
00:51:25,320 --> 00:51:26,960
Speaker 3: if you're a woman and you're like, I know a

1172
00:51:27,000 --> 00:51:30,200
Speaker 3: man that could probably hear this, if you really think

1173
00:51:30,239 --> 00:51:32,000
Speaker 3: that the patriarchy and this stuff doesn't impact you, like

1174
00:51:32,040 --> 00:51:34,560
Speaker 3: I want you men to reflect on every moment you

1175
00:51:34,560 --> 00:51:37,080
Speaker 3: feel so stressed and anxious because you are just burdened

1176
00:51:37,120 --> 00:51:40,200
Speaker 3: with expectations of like can't talk about your mental health.

1177
00:51:40,200 --> 00:51:42,120
Speaker 2: You're not allowed to cry. You were expected to be

1178
00:51:42,120 --> 00:51:43,799
Speaker 2: the bread winner. You expect it to be tough.

1179
00:51:43,840 --> 00:51:46,000
Speaker 3: You probably didn't get to follow your passion. Maybe when

1180
00:51:46,040 --> 00:51:47,440
Speaker 3: you were younger, you we told you couldn't do X,

1181
00:51:47,560 --> 00:51:50,160
Speaker 3: y Z because you were a boy. Like, all of

1182
00:51:50,200 --> 00:51:53,520
Speaker 3: that is the patriarchy. So when we talk about gender equity,

1183
00:51:53,520 --> 00:51:55,719
Speaker 3: we're also talking about liberating men and boys in a

1184
00:51:55,840 --> 00:51:58,479
Speaker 3: very very real way totally. There was a study recently

1185
00:51:58,520 --> 00:52:01,239
Speaker 3: done in India where like, young boys were were surveyed to

1186
00:52:01,280 --> 00:52:02,960
Speaker 3: be like just about their mental health and about their

1187
00:52:02,960 --> 00:52:05,160
Speaker 3: family lives, and the amount of young boys that say,

1188
00:52:05,800 --> 00:52:09,080
Speaker 3: I don't remember the last time I was hugged, like hugged.

1189
00:52:09,680 --> 00:52:12,520
Speaker 3: Now you tell me, do you think that garners a

1190
00:52:12,520 --> 00:52:16,360
Speaker 3: healthy adult man? If you've never been exposed to affection

1191
00:52:16,440 --> 00:52:17,879
Speaker 3: and never been told you've done a good job where

1192
00:52:17,880 --> 00:52:20,400
Speaker 3: you're allowed to cry, your allowed to have emotions, you

1193
00:52:20,440 --> 00:52:23,879
Speaker 3: are also going through a mental health crisis a lot

1194
00:52:23,880 --> 00:52:25,960
Speaker 3: of men, right, and so like really truly, I mean

1195
00:52:26,040 --> 00:52:28,440
Speaker 3: some bottom of my heart. When we talk about gender equity,

1196
00:52:28,440 --> 00:52:31,640
Speaker 3: we're talking about the betterment of every person, not just.

1197
00:52:31,520 --> 00:52:34,560
Speaker 2: Girls and women. And you should research this more because

1198
00:52:34,560 --> 00:52:38,160
Speaker 2: there's so many stats about this. Yes, so many economies

1199
00:52:38,160 --> 00:52:42,040
Speaker 2: would flourish one percent, governments would be more peaceful, Like

1200
00:52:42,040 --> 00:52:44,200
Speaker 2: there's so many stats about this, and we know.

1201
00:52:44,200 --> 00:52:46,600
Speaker 1: It to be true. And that's the thing too, Like

1202
00:52:47,040 --> 00:52:50,440
Speaker 1: there's this misnomer right that for example, if we created

1203
00:52:50,480 --> 00:52:53,560
Speaker 1: gender equity in terms of pay parody, the men are like,

1204
00:52:53,560 --> 00:52:56,120
Speaker 1: then we'd be getting paid less And it's like no,

1205
00:52:56,840 --> 00:52:59,759
Speaker 1: but the GDP of this country. If I snapped my

1206
00:53:00,400 --> 00:53:03,200
Speaker 1: and everyone was getting paid the same in America, the

1207
00:53:03,239 --> 00:53:06,760
Speaker 1: actual GDP of the country would increase by fourteen points.

1208
00:53:07,560 --> 00:53:10,879
Speaker 1: So everyone would just have more money, which would also

1209
00:53:10,920 --> 00:53:12,960
Speaker 1: mean you wouldn't be so stressed about making so much

1210
00:53:13,000 --> 00:53:15,200
Speaker 1: money because our partner would also have money. And then

1211
00:53:15,239 --> 00:53:17,160
Speaker 1: everyone would just be able to go on vacation.

1212
00:53:17,320 --> 00:53:19,200
Speaker 2: And then we just have our yachts next to each other.

1213
00:53:20,160 --> 00:53:20,839
Speaker 2: Sounds really nice.

1214
00:53:20,880 --> 00:53:22,520
Speaker 3: It sounds like you're preventing us from having our yachts

1215
00:53:22,520 --> 00:53:24,759
Speaker 3: next to each other if you're in disagreement with us.

1216
00:53:24,800 --> 00:53:25,279
Speaker 2: To be honest, I.

1217
00:53:25,239 --> 00:53:26,719
Speaker 1: Don't even need a yacht. I just need like a

1218
00:53:26,760 --> 00:53:28,080
Speaker 1: boat that can pull a wakeboard.

1219
00:53:28,160 --> 00:53:29,960
Speaker 2: And there you go. And you know what, if you

1220
00:53:29,960 --> 00:53:32,040
Speaker 2: believe in the patriarchy, you're preventing that from happening. You

1221
00:53:32,120 --> 00:53:37,359
Speaker 2: heard it here first, you're denying absolutely absolutely, sir.

1222
00:53:38,520 --> 00:53:42,400
Speaker 1: Well, not that you need anything more on your plate,

1223
00:53:42,520 --> 00:53:45,520
Speaker 1: but I know you love to have on your plate.

1224
00:53:46,040 --> 00:53:48,200
Speaker 2: I do like you love you.

1225
00:53:48,719 --> 00:53:51,760
Speaker 1: I think we're similar in this way that the more

1226
00:53:52,320 --> 00:53:55,200
Speaker 1: there is for us to touch and learn and focus on,

1227
00:53:55,360 --> 00:53:59,240
Speaker 1: the more kind of whole we feel absolutely more excited.

1228
00:53:59,280 --> 00:54:03,680
Speaker 1: We feel so when you survey this big landscape of

1229
00:54:03,760 --> 00:54:07,000
Speaker 1: everything you have going on and everything coming up, what

1230
00:54:07,160 --> 00:54:09,319
Speaker 1: feels like your work in progress?

1231
00:54:09,960 --> 00:54:10,240
Speaker 4: Hmm?

1232
00:54:11,640 --> 00:54:13,719
Speaker 3: Okay, so I'm even I don't know if you're gonna

1233
00:54:13,719 --> 00:54:15,560
Speaker 3: like this answer, but this is my most honest answer.

1234
00:54:15,560 --> 00:54:15,840
Speaker 2: Okay.

1235
00:54:16,320 --> 00:54:20,439
Speaker 3: I've been very actively trying to learn that my these

1236
00:54:20,480 --> 00:54:22,360
Speaker 3: projects that I love so much, and the work that

1237
00:54:22,400 --> 00:54:24,080
Speaker 3: I do and I love so much, and my accolades

1238
00:54:24,080 --> 00:54:27,880
Speaker 3: and accomplishments are not actually my identity. Okay, So what

1239
00:54:27,920 --> 00:54:30,839
Speaker 3: my real work in progress is, Lily, It's always going

1240
00:54:30,880 --> 00:54:32,759
Speaker 3: to be me. It's gonna be the evolution of who

1241
00:54:32,760 --> 00:54:35,359
Speaker 3: I am. It's I love this movie and I hope

1242
00:54:35,360 --> 00:54:37,320
Speaker 3: it does really well, and I do have of course,

1243
00:54:37,360 --> 00:54:41,040
Speaker 3: I naturally have expectations, but how I value those expectations

1244
00:54:41,120 --> 00:54:42,759
Speaker 3: very different from how I would have valued them a year,

1245
00:54:42,840 --> 00:54:43,600
Speaker 3: like a decade ago.

1246
00:54:43,640 --> 00:54:45,840
Speaker 2: Honestly. So, my work in progress is to be a

1247
00:54:45,840 --> 00:54:46,600
Speaker 2: student for life.

1248
00:54:46,680 --> 00:54:48,960
Speaker 3: I'm a big That is my like life mission is

1249
00:54:49,000 --> 00:54:51,000
Speaker 3: to be It's my most recent tattoo. It's like student

1250
00:54:51,040 --> 00:54:52,640
Speaker 3: for life. I want to learn as much as possible.

1251
00:54:52,640 --> 00:54:54,560
Speaker 3: I want to evolve as much as possible. I don't

1252
00:54:54,560 --> 00:54:55,279
Speaker 3: want to stay the same.

1253
00:54:55,280 --> 00:54:57,560
Speaker 2: I want to grow every single day, and that is

1254
00:54:57,560 --> 00:54:58,480
Speaker 2: my work in progress.

1255
00:54:58,520 --> 00:55:00,960
Speaker 3: I want to master my mind the best of my ability.

1256
00:55:01,000 --> 00:55:02,920
Speaker 3: I want to be as self aware as I possibly

1257
00:55:02,960 --> 00:55:05,359
Speaker 3: can be. I want to learn about people, I want

1258
00:55:05,360 --> 00:55:08,360
Speaker 3: to learn about things. I want to be proven wrong.

1259
00:55:08,760 --> 00:55:11,319
Speaker 3: I want to fail a million more times. I want

1260
00:55:11,360 --> 00:55:13,760
Speaker 3: to win a million more times. My work in progress

1261
00:55:13,800 --> 00:55:16,480
Speaker 3: is always going to be my mind and my spirituality

1262
00:55:16,480 --> 00:55:18,160
Speaker 3: and my growth. Always beautiful.

1263
00:55:18,320 --> 00:55:20,080
Speaker 2: Yeah, I love it. And hopefully along the way I

1264
00:55:20,120 --> 00:55:22,239
Speaker 2: can have some good box office numbers and I can

1265
00:55:22,320 --> 00:55:25,440
Speaker 2: have a successful movie also. But yeah, those things are

1266
00:55:25,480 --> 00:55:27,399
Speaker 2: not who I am. Yeah, you know what I mean.

1267
00:55:27,719 --> 00:55:32,080
Speaker 1: Yeah, if if your job had to change tomorrow, who

1268
00:55:32,120 --> 00:55:33,120
Speaker 1: you are stays with.

1269
00:55:33,000 --> 00:55:35,279
Speaker 3: You exactly, because you know tomorrow. I could just as

1270
00:55:35,320 --> 00:55:37,520
Speaker 3: easily be an event planner. You know this, Oh my god,

1271
00:55:37,520 --> 00:55:38,279
Speaker 3: you're so good at it.

1272
00:55:38,320 --> 00:55:40,360
Speaker 2: I could make a charcutery board at the drop of

1273
00:55:40,360 --> 00:55:41,440
Speaker 2: a hat, right here, you know it.

1274
00:55:41,640 --> 00:55:44,520
Speaker 1: That is always my party, my party trick. But I

1275
00:55:44,560 --> 00:55:47,279
Speaker 1: feel like you you could do the charcutery board and

1276
00:55:47,320 --> 00:55:50,160
Speaker 1: also the entire interior in the time it would probably

1277
00:55:50,200 --> 00:55:51,960
Speaker 1: take the rest of us to just do the board, So.

1278
00:55:51,960 --> 00:55:53,000
Speaker 2: I could be an event But I thank you so

1279
00:55:53,080 --> 00:55:54,440
Speaker 2: much is the nicest thing I ever said to me.

1280
00:55:54,680 --> 00:55:56,640
Speaker 1: Really, I see you, okay, see you, and I love you,

1281
00:55:56,719 --> 00:55:57,600
Speaker 1: and I thank you for coming.

1282
00:55:57,640 --> 00:55:58,920
Speaker 2: I see you when I love you, and I thank

1283
00:55:58,960 --> 00:56:00,839
Speaker 2: you for having me. Thank you, Proud of you. You're

1284
00:56:00,880 --> 00:56:03,799
Speaker 2: so hot. Hey,