WEBVTT - Dawn follows dark

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<v Speaker 1>Welcome to Before Breakfast, a production of I Heart Radio.

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<v Speaker 1>Good Morning. This is Laura. Welcome to the Before Breakfast podcast.

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<v Speaker 1>Today's tip is that dawn follows dark. Life often cycles

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<v Speaker 1>through ups and doubts, and when we are feeling our worst,

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<v Speaker 1>it is helpful to remember that the odds are good

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<v Speaker 1>that we will feel better at some point in the future.

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<v Speaker 1>This episode is first airing around the Winter solstice, which

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<v Speaker 1>is the longest night in the Northern Hemisphere. My church

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<v Speaker 1>has a Longest Night service which is designed to help

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<v Speaker 1>people who are mourning commemorate the holidays with the knowledge

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<v Speaker 1>that this can be a hard and lonely time. But

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<v Speaker 1>there is a reason that this commemoration is on the

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<v Speaker 1>longest night, because that is the longest that the night

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<v Speaker 1>will get. After the longest night, the days start lengthening.

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<v Speaker 1>There is more light each day in places towards the

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<v Speaker 1>polar circle, where there is twenty four hour darkness in winter.

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<v Speaker 1>Once the sun rises for the first time in January,

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<v Speaker 1>the days lengthened rapidly, from a few minutes on that

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<v Speaker 1>first day to several hours within the first few weeks.

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<v Speaker 1>It is a noticeable and intense brightening of the world.

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<v Speaker 1>I find this to be a helpful metaphor, because happiness,

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<v Speaker 1>like the light on this planet, tends to ebb and

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<v Speaker 1>flow at different times. When we are in the depths

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<v Speaker 1>of sorrow, it is hard to believe that anything could

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<v Speaker 1>ever be different. But the nature of a low point

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<v Speaker 1>is that it is indeed a low point. The odds

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<v Speaker 1>are good that some happier moments will happen in the future.

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<v Speaker 1>I am reminded of one of Tolstoy's wise phrases from

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<v Speaker 1>war and peace, Pure and complete sorrow is as impossible

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<v Speaker 1>as pure and complete joy. Natasha grieves, but she is young,

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<v Speaker 1>and the world still has its many beautiful things. There

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<v Speaker 1>are kind people, and there is merriment to be had,

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<v Speaker 1>even if there are shadows that temper this enjoyment. So

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<v Speaker 1>it goes with many things in life. Some research has

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<v Speaker 1>found that people tend to go through a marked midlife

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<v Speaker 1>drop in mood, but then experience a rapid increase in

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<v Speaker 1>happiness in their fifties. If you are feeling unreasonably dissatisfied

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<v Speaker 1>with everything in your life in your forties, that is

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<v Speaker 1>a hope worth holding onto. I once read a fascinating

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<v Speaker 1>study that followed couples who were considering divorce not for

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<v Speaker 1>abuse or abandonment reasons, but because their marriages felt miserable.

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<v Speaker 1>Some couples went through with divorce, some didn't. Of those

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<v Speaker 1>who didn't, five years later, many were actually decently happy

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<v Speaker 1>in their marriages. They had simply gone through a really

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<v Speaker 1>low point, and then with time, they had climbed out

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<v Speaker 1>of it. Dawn follows dark. To be sure, one can

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<v Speaker 1>see that this truth means that even if you are

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<v Speaker 1>feeling blissfully happy right now, that probably won't last either.

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<v Speaker 1>Into every life, some darkness falls. You can waste your

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<v Speaker 1>happiness dreading it, but that won't preserve your happiness or

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<v Speaker 1>forestall tragedy. Best to enjoy the good moments, knowing how

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<v Speaker 1>precious they are. But this realization is comforting. When times

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<v Speaker 1>are darker, most likely the days will get lighter. Something

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<v Speaker 1>wonderful will happen in your future. Pure joy may not

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<v Speaker 1>be possible in life, but pure sorrow that lasts forever

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<v Speaker 1>really isn't either. You can just keep going with faith

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<v Speaker 1>that the light you can't see now is there waiting

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<v Speaker 1>on the other side of this longest night, ready to

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<v Speaker 1>warm you in time. In the meantime, this is Laura.

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<v Speaker 1>Thanks for listening and here's to making the most of

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<v Speaker 1>our time. Hey everybody, I'd love to hear from you.

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<v Speaker 1>You can send me your tips, your questions, or anything else.

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<v Speaker 1>Just connect with me on Twitter, Facebook and Instagram at

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<v Speaker 1>Before Breakfast pod. That's B the number four, then Breakfast

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<v Speaker 1>p o D. You can also shoot me an email

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<v Speaker 1>at Before Breakfast podcast at i heeart media dot com

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<v Speaker 1>that Before Breakfast is spelled out with all the letters.

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<v Speaker 1>Thanks so much, I look forward to staying in touch.

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<v Speaker 1>Before Breakfast is a production of I heart Radio. For

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