Speaker 1: I won't let my body out outweigh everything that I'm
Speaker 1: made dope, won't spend my life trying to change. I'm
Speaker 1: learning to love who I am. I get I'm strong,
Speaker 1: I feel free, I know who every part of me
Speaker 1: it's beautiful and then will always out if you feel
Speaker 1: it with your hands in here, she'll some love to
Speaker 1: the boy. Let's say good day and did you and
Speaker 1: die out Happy Saturday. Outweigh fam amy here And I'm
Speaker 1: joined today by Dylan Hey, Dylan Hi Aby, Dylan Murphy
Speaker 1: to be specific, and on Instagram Dylan Murphy dot r D.
Speaker 1: And you're registered Dietitians with the r DS for and
Speaker 1: I'm on your Instagram right now. And as part of
Speaker 1: your bio, you have ditch diets Gain Freedom. And I
Speaker 1: gotta say, that's what Outweigh is all about, is trying
Speaker 1: to find that freedom. Our tagline is a life without
Speaker 1: disordered eating outweighs everything. So that's why it's called outweigh.
Speaker 1: So what made you focus on this or be that
Speaker 1: type of dietitian because Lord knows, there's other kinds. Yeah, gosh,
Speaker 1: there's so many other kinds. And I feel like, oftentimes
Speaker 1: when I tell people I'm a dietitian. I'm like, let
Speaker 1: me explain what type of dietician I am, because yeah,
Speaker 1: we're not all created equal. I think for me, once
Speaker 1: I experienced what like life outside of rules of calorie counting,
Speaker 1: all of all of that was like for myself personally,
Speaker 1: which happened after I became a dietician. I was like,
Speaker 1: I can't teach people things that I learned in school.
Speaker 1: I can't teach people how to count calories, what to eat,
Speaker 1: what not to eat, because there's so much freedom, like
Speaker 1: I have in that tagline, like so much freedom that
Speaker 1: lies outside of of diets that I've experienced myself and
Speaker 1: been able to help other clients experience as well. So
Speaker 1: I think my own personal experience has played a huge
Speaker 1: role in definitely wanting to help people just find that freedom.
Speaker 1: And do you feel as though when you were in
Speaker 1: school the main focus was teaching people how to diet. Yeah,
Speaker 1: And I gosh, I tell a lot of my clients
Speaker 1: and just a lot of people like I feel like
Speaker 1: as dietitians, and I guess I can't speak for every program,
Speaker 1: but a lot of programs we almost learn, like how
Speaker 1: to give people eating disorders, to like put it bluntly,
Speaker 1: like we learn a lot about strict calorie diets, what
Speaker 1: to eat, what not to eat. It's very like weight
Speaker 1: centric approach. And so this idea of like intuitive eating
Speaker 1: of more like weight neutral care was very foreign to me,
Speaker 1: honestly until I mean, I think I learned a lot
Speaker 1: about through Instagram and then did a lot of like
Speaker 1: self study on my own, did more like courses in
Speaker 1: training on like intuitive eating and eating disorders. Because even
Speaker 1: in college I probably had two lectures on eating disorders,
Speaker 1: and in my postgrad program to be a dietitian, I
Speaker 1: had like a one week rotation in like an intensive
Speaker 1: treatment center for eating disorder. So we get very very
Speaker 1: little training in that area, right, which is you know,
Speaker 1: part of the problem. And so for those of us listening,
Speaker 1: I feel like right now, yeah, I'm a listener to
Speaker 1: and you know, we wonder how we end up the
Speaker 1: way we end up, and it's because it's just the norm.
Speaker 1: It's like, it's what we hear from diet industry. It's
Speaker 1: what we see on Instagram. It used to be billboards, magazines, TV,
Speaker 1: but that's been the narrative for a long time. And
Speaker 1: then that's what we've that's what we're fed. And then
Speaker 1: you know, just casual conversations with other humans and other dieticians.
Speaker 1: That's that's the narrative. Like even when you showed up
Speaker 1: at my house, my father in law said, oh, no,
Speaker 1: you're a dietitian. Are you here to tell me I
Speaker 1: can't have my ice cream? And that's a normal funny
Speaker 1: ha hall, but like also very serious nutrition this joke,
Speaker 1: and you were able to say, actually, that's not what
Speaker 1: I do. I would maybe encourage you to even yeah,
Speaker 1: eat the scape. You mentioned weight neutral? Can you just
Speaker 1: define that for people? Yeah, absolutely, that's a good question.
Speaker 1: So really weight neutral, what that means is like being
Speaker 1: able to look at someone for more than just like
Speaker 1: the size of their body, because I think in I
Speaker 1: keep going back a lot to like how we're trained
Speaker 1: as dietitians, were taught to really look at weight as
Speaker 1: like the number one marker of health. But what we
Speaker 1: know to be true and and what like research shows
Speaker 1: us is that that's not true. There's so many things
Speaker 1: outside of the size of our body that dictate our
Speaker 1: health status. In in a weight neutral approach, the way
Speaker 1: I view it as really taking like a holistic approach
Speaker 1: to someone, So looking at the whole person of like
Speaker 1: your stress, your emotions, your mental health, your friendships. Um, sure,
Speaker 1: we look at physical health, we look at are you
Speaker 1: eating vegetables? That sort of thing, but really looking at
Speaker 1: like the whole picture of someone's health instead of just
Speaker 1: honing in on the size of their body. There's a
Speaker 1: post you put up on Instagram in the May the
Speaker 1: actually said, in comparison to all the other things you've
Speaker 1: lost to your eating disorder, doesn't wait seems so insignificant.
Speaker 1: And I look back to when my eating disorder was
Speaker 1: ruling my life, and yes, my stress level was high,
Speaker 1: my friendships were poor, my relationships, my capacity to do
Speaker 1: other things, just everything was second to the eating disorder.
Speaker 1: I you know, was having a conversation with a friend
Speaker 1: you know, the other day about just who I was
Speaker 1: when they first met me. And my eating disorder arrived
Speaker 1: on the scene when I was a teenager. But then
Speaker 1: somehow I got a grip of at least the purging part.
Speaker 1: For I realized I thought, because I got rid of that,
Speaker 1: that I got rid of my eating disorder. But I
Speaker 1: adopted all kinds of other disordered behaviors, like orthorexia and
Speaker 1: working out NonStop and not enjoying meal time and family
Speaker 1: and friends. But the BELIEMI A part came back in
Speaker 1: two thousand and fourteen. So I went over a decade
Speaker 1: without that, and I thought I was doing pretty good,
Speaker 1: and I probably was better all things considered. But it
Speaker 1: came back, and my relationship with certain people just formed
Speaker 1: around that time. There's a few people in my life
Speaker 1: that I met around that time, and the version of
Speaker 1: me that they met was spiraling, but they didn't know
Speaker 1: it because I wasn't saying. It took me a minute
Speaker 1: or a couple of years to admit my eating disorders back,
Speaker 1: and then to even admit finally I needed to get
Speaker 1: into some sort of recovery. But those relationships weren't built
Speaker 1: with a strong foundation because I was so self absorbed.
Speaker 1: It's a very selfish I don't did we call it
Speaker 1: a disease. It's a very okay, so it's disorder. There
Speaker 1: we go, eating disordered, disordered behavior. I don't know why
Speaker 1: I was faced on that, but it's a very selfish thing.
Speaker 1: And I know it's hard to, you know, face that
Speaker 1: reality that it takes up so much of your brain space,
Speaker 1: that you don't have a room for much else, and
Speaker 1: unfortunately it starts to take over and it just spreads
Speaker 1: like a wildfire within you. And then okay, yeah, now
Speaker 1: you have no control. It's very still selfish, but you
Speaker 1: don't feel like you can even get out even if
Speaker 1: you want to. Yes, I love the imagery of a
Speaker 1: wildfire because I feel like that's exactly how eating disorders
Speaker 1: can so often start of like it maybe one little
Speaker 1: spark of like oh I just need to like lose
Speaker 1: a few pounds, eat a little bit less here, do this,
Speaker 1: do that, But then it's so easily immerses into this
Speaker 1: like huge problem, and I think what you said of
Speaker 1: it being this like selfish kind of self centered thing.
Speaker 1: One thing I want to add on that too, is
Speaker 1: like it doesn't mean that you are choosing to be
Speaker 1: sick or choosing to have a problem. Like if you're
Speaker 1: listening and you're like, gosh, I do struggle with any disorder,
Speaker 1: like I am so focused on myself. There is a
Speaker 1: way that you can get help, there's a way you
Speaker 1: can get out of it. And it can also feel
Speaker 1: like you you are stuck and that you can't get
Speaker 1: out of it. But yeah, I love I love what
Speaker 1: you said about friends as well, because I think I don't.
Speaker 1: It's easy to think that, like, oh, well, my friends
Speaker 1: are only going to like me if I'm like this size,
Speaker 1: or like what what would they think if I tell
Speaker 1: them I'm struggling with a needing disorder. I'm curious for
Speaker 1: you and those like with your friends, were you able
Speaker 1: to like share with them what you're struggling with that
Speaker 1: they already know eventually. But I think really the problem
Speaker 1: with me and this is layers deep. It's not just
Speaker 1: the disorder, it's stuff from it's just lack of connection.
Speaker 1: You've got so much going on inside your head you
Speaker 1: don't have room to really truly connect. And then there's
Speaker 1: the whole thing like how can you love others if
Speaker 1: you're not loving yourself? And what's your relationship like with yourself?
Speaker 1: How are you showing up for you? And then in
Speaker 1: turn that effects how you show up for others, And
Speaker 1: you kind of have these At least for me, I
Speaker 1: can only speak for myself. I had these, you know,
Speaker 1: eating disorder goggles on to the world. I was trying
Speaker 1: to be fine, but I was still viewing everything through
Speaker 1: my goggles. And I know I wasn't someone that had
Speaker 1: the thoughts of my friends are only gonna like me
Speaker 1: if I'm thin. It just affected connection with people, even
Speaker 1: my own spouse, my children, anybody it's not. And then
Speaker 1: also it affected well part of connection. This is like
Speaker 1: a little piece like if we were to branch off
Speaker 1: from that, it's you know, enjoying each other meal time,
Speaker 1: going out to eat something we've discussed multiple times of
Speaker 1: you know, just missing out. You stay home because you
Speaker 1: don't want to be faced with the fear of having
Speaker 1: to eat something that doesn't fit into your box or
Speaker 1: you'll have no way to you know, go work it
Speaker 1: off afterwards or get read of it, and so you
Speaker 1: just choose to stay home. So I think that's lack
Speaker 1: of connection right there. And we were built for community
Speaker 1: and it's a very isolating disorder. And so that's where
Speaker 1: outweigh comes in and having experts on like you and
Speaker 1: people sharing their stories and is that glimmer of hope
Speaker 1: for people that it's okay, you're not just listening right
Speaker 1: now and we're not yelling at you that you're selfish
Speaker 1: and there's no it's more like, hey, I was selfish.
Speaker 1: I can see it, and it took over to where
Speaker 1: I wasn't really trying to be selfish. It just was
Speaker 1: out of my control. But I had to make the
Speaker 1: choice to take take charge of my own destiny and
Speaker 1: start doing so. If someone is listening right now and
Speaker 1: they're like, Okay, well I want to take charge, what's
Speaker 1: the first step. I love that you said that's I
Speaker 1: actually posted something. I think it was even like yesterday
Speaker 1: or maybe two days ago. Why have your Instagram let
Speaker 1: to pull it up? Okay, hold on, I think you're
Speaker 1: probably it's a very less thing, at least that the
Speaker 1: time of recording this that you posted. And is it
Speaker 1: the one where you said change will not happen unless
Speaker 1: you choose it. Yes, Yes, So I tell my clients
Speaker 1: that all the time because and I think in the
Speaker 1: caption I wrote like I tell clients all the time
Speaker 1: like I can't want recovery for you more than you
Speaker 1: want it for yourself. I can't want freedom from diets
Speaker 1: for you more than you want it yourself, and for gosh,
Speaker 1: all my clients, even just all human beings across the world,
Speaker 1: like I want everyone to be able to experience freedom
Speaker 1: with food, freedom and their body, because I think it
Speaker 1: just brings so much more fullness to your life. But yeah,
Speaker 1: the first step I think first is that like awareness
Speaker 1: of Okay, something's not working, there's a problem. I need
Speaker 1: help with this, And then I think a great place.
Speaker 1: Well one, if you're listening to this episode, you've already
Speaker 1: started at a great place, like listening to podcast episodes
Speaker 1: all about recovery and eating disorders and food freedom, but
Speaker 1: even reaching out for support. I think this is something
Speaker 1: like Amy mentioned, where it's easy to be isolated and
Speaker 1: kind of stuck in this journey by yourself, and you're
Speaker 1: eating disorder loves that it wants to be isolated. So
Speaker 1: the more you can bring it to the light and
Speaker 1: bring someone else into your journey, like a therapist, a
Speaker 1: dietitian preferably both can be huge and there's there's great
Speaker 1: resources out there. Um gosh, I'm trying to think of
Speaker 1: the exact names. But even if you just google like
Speaker 1: eating disorder dietitian near me wherever you happen to live,
Speaker 1: or a therapist that specializes in eating disorders like our
Speaker 1: mutual friend cat Fata. Absolutely, because it's very important, you
Speaker 1: could easily fall into a therapist that doesn't have eating disorder,
Speaker 1: training or focus, and they might they just saying that, Yeah,
Speaker 1: with dietitians, you can find someone that would kind of
Speaker 1: come alongside eating disorder and we don't want that. So yeah,
Speaker 1: and that's a great place, even like opening up to
Speaker 1: family and friends, which can be so hard and I
Speaker 1: think could be a whole another podcast episode in its olt,
Speaker 1: but like inviting someone else into your journey that's in
Speaker 1: your day to say life, that can keep you accountable
Speaker 1: to Well, you're going to be back next week, so
Speaker 1: maybe we talk more into that next Saturday. Dylan is
Speaker 1: going to be on the next two Saturdays, so including today,
Speaker 1: three total. And under this post that you put up
Speaker 1: about you know, change will not happen unless you choose it,
Speaker 1: you had someone comment named Natalie, and I like this,
Speaker 1: so I'm going to read their comment and she said, yes,
Speaker 1: we are only a choice away from changing our attitude
Speaker 1: minute to minute, which in turn leads to a better
Speaker 1: life by small choices adding up. And sometimes we look
Speaker 1: at the mountain and the climb seems too much, But
Speaker 1: one choice, one step towards it gets us to the
Speaker 1: top eventually. Yes, but I know it takes time. I'm
Speaker 1: sure you as an expert in's field can just say
Speaker 1: you have to be incredibly patient with yourself and give
Speaker 1: yourself so much grace. Yes, because it does. It takes time,
Speaker 1: and I think it can be daunting, like when you
Speaker 1: recognize I need help, I'm tired of struggling with these
Speaker 1: behaviors I'm struggling with, it can feel so daunting of like, Okay, well,
Speaker 1: how do I go from now to recovery and to
Speaker 1: this freedom that you're talking about? But I think exactly
Speaker 1: like that Comma Amy just read, it's like step by
Speaker 1: step waking up every morning, like, Okay, what's one thing
Speaker 1: I can do today to talk back to my eating disorder?
Speaker 1: What's one thing I can do today to choose recovery?
Speaker 1: And having that same mindset every day. For me, one
Speaker 1: of the things was like I had to wake up
Speaker 1: and for so long I restricted breakfast. So my one
Speaker 1: thing that I would wake up and do is I
Speaker 1: didn't care if I was hungry or not. I went
Speaker 1: ate breakfast, which is like a huge thing for so
Speaker 1: many people because I think breakfast is an easy one
Speaker 1: to skip, yes, because you know, we're told like and
Speaker 1: some people are able to do that and they don't have.
Speaker 1: I just know this is this is for outweigh this
Speaker 1: is for the people with disordered behaviors, because I have
Speaker 1: some friends that are like, oh no, I mean, I'm
Speaker 1: doing this for my brain and I'm not. I'm sharper
Speaker 1: If I that's great, it is, it doesn't they can
Speaker 1: still go out and enjoy time with friends. They don't
Speaker 1: have to go to the gym five times a day. Like.
Speaker 1: There are people that are able to do it, and
Speaker 1: that's sometimes where it gets tricky. And maybe we can
Speaker 1: dive into that next Saturday with the family and friends thing,
Speaker 1: because sometimes we have family and friends that don't quite
Speaker 1: get it and they're like, well, but this is what
Speaker 1: I do. And you just have to really know that
Speaker 1: just because someone else is doing it's not for you.
Speaker 1: That's why people on Instagram posting what they eat in
Speaker 1: a day is so ridiculous. Don't compare yourself. Yeah, we
Speaker 1: cannot compare ourselves at all. You have a podcast, right
Speaker 1: I do. Yeah, So it's called Free Method Podcast and
Speaker 1: every week it's either myself or I'm interviewing other guests,
Speaker 1: so other just experts in the area, whether it's therapist, dieticians,
Speaker 1: or just people. I mean even similar to Amy who
Speaker 1: like have a history with with an E disorder or
Speaker 1: disordered eating. Um. We've also kind of expanded some into
Speaker 1: I'm a new mom, so lots of conversation around just
Speaker 1: like motherhood and body image and and really just everything
Speaker 1: that encapsulates like living life free of diets and eating disorders.
Speaker 1: Say the name of it one more time in please
Speaker 1: people want to leave this episode and go listen. So
Speaker 1: it's called Free Method f R E Method podcast and
Speaker 1: you can find that wherever you listen to podcast awesome
Speaker 1: and then your Instagram handle. I'll give that one more
Speaker 1: time in case people want to go maybe screenshot. I'm
Speaker 1: a big screenshotter of encouragement that I see on Instagram
Speaker 1: some when I screenshot a lot is Mel Robbins. Do
Speaker 1: you yollow her? She's so great and Cat and I
Speaker 1: talk about her all the time. But she's Another tip
Speaker 1: that she has for starting her day off strong is
Speaker 1: she has the five second role to get out of bed,
Speaker 1: so one get up and then we were talking about
Speaker 1: you know what you do when you wake up earlier.
Speaker 1: But she loves to high five herself in the mirror,
Speaker 1: and that might be something you could try that could
Speaker 1: be step one. It's just get out of bed and
Speaker 1: go to the mirror and look at yourself and say,
Speaker 1: high five. You can do this. You can go eat breakfast.
Speaker 1: High five. And it might be daunting, but it's just
Speaker 1: that repetition. It's waking up every day and making that choice,
Speaker 1: waking up every day and making the next right choice,
Speaker 1: and you build those new neuropathways and then it starts
Speaker 1: to become a habit where that becomes more easy to
Speaker 1: do and you look back of like, oh wow, now
Speaker 1: I do this like so seamlessly. I eat breakfast and
Speaker 1: don't even think to us about it. I get out
Speaker 1: of bed, high five myself in the mirror, and it's
Speaker 1: a habit now. Yeah, you have another post that says
Speaker 1: hi ku about dieting, and I'm laughing because my daughter
Speaker 1: just wrapped eighth grade and she had this e l
Speaker 1: a test or something that she's had to ride a
Speaker 1: hiku and yours is just um, I think it's seven seven. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I probably couldn't write a real hiku, but yes, yes
Speaker 1: it is, and um, yours is just no no no
Speaker 1: no no, and the next line is no no no no.
Speaker 1: And so really we just want to leave you with
Speaker 1: that is if you get a crazy idea in your
Speaker 1: head to maybe try some new diet, and there's a
Speaker 1: lot of posers out there. They're trying to say they're
Speaker 1: not a diet, but they are diet. Yes, if they
Speaker 1: say they're not a diet, it they're a diet, right,
Speaker 1: because there's no diet, there's there's okay, So just say
Speaker 1: say it with us. No no, no, no, no, no
Speaker 1: no no. So that's what you have to say to
Speaker 1: yourself is no, and then go high five yourself for
Speaker 1: being like yes, yes, no, yes, Okay, well Dylan, thank
Speaker 1: you so much for joining today, and then yeah, Dylan's
Speaker 1: gonna be back the next two Saturdays. We just want
Speaker 1: to leave you all with hope and encouragement to tackle
Speaker 1: the rest of your weekend and take care of yourself
Speaker 1: and find a way where you can connect with someone
Speaker 1: else today, whatever that looks like. So that way you
Speaker 1: get out of your own head and start investing into
Speaker 1: relationships in your life that really matter, because you know,
Speaker 1: a relationship with food ends up pretty lonely. And that's
Speaker 1: who I spent a lot of time with for many years,
Speaker 1: lots of food alone in my room watching something and
Speaker 1: you know it's it's only cool for a minute, so
Speaker 1: there's more to life and um yeah, we wish you
Speaker 1: the best, See you all next weekend. By but the
Speaker 1: Pat