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Speaker 1: And welcome to this year's twenty twenty Olympics in Tokyo, Japan.

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Speaker 1: I'm Tommy hammer Pants and it's time for the opening ceremonies.

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Speaker 1: The thrill, the pageantry, the possible STDs. What is it

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Speaker 1: to love about the Olympics. It's a jewel show again,

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Speaker 1: It's the Jewel Show and the Olympics are this Friday.

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Speaker 1: If you didn't realize that the twenty twenty Olympics on Friday, No,

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Speaker 1: I'd never watched the Olympics. I'm not twenty twenty. I

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Speaker 1: know they had to cancel the Olympics last year and

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Speaker 1: move it to this year, But because they don't want

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Speaker 1: to screw up the every four years thing with the Olympics,

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Speaker 1: they're still calling it the twenty twenty Olympics. But it's

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Speaker 1: twenty twenty one. The branding and everything people would have

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Speaker 1: got thrown off if it became different. Oh yeah, they

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Speaker 1: probably already had all the shirts and everything all done.

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Speaker 1: That says twenty twenty, and they're like that'll cost too

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Speaker 1: much money. But the reason that I bring up best

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Speaker 1: tds is because, as always, whenever the Olympics happen, the

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Speaker 1: athletes together and they play their sport and then they

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Speaker 1: bone they like they always just give them out, So

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Speaker 1: they're giving out over one hundred and fifty thousand. There's

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Speaker 1: going to be that much happening, dude, they really I'm

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Speaker 1: not over exaggerating when I say it. They always give

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Speaker 1: out so many, but this year is different. What then

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Speaker 1: past Olympics. Because past Olympics they give them out in

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Speaker 1: the Olympic village to all the athletes. They are like,

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Speaker 1: here's here's your event schedule, here's your defel bag of condoms.

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Speaker 1: But they're asking them not to use them at the

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Speaker 1: Olympics and to take them home with them. Wait, so

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Speaker 1: go role, Well they don't because of because of COVID,

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Speaker 1: you're still supposed to be social distancing. Oh okay, so

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Speaker 1: they're not supposed to be within st that's what they said. Yes,

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Speaker 1: but they were actually like to use them when you're here, right,

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Speaker 1: take them home and use them at home, but actually

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Speaker 1: use them here. Yeah okay, because they had to like

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Speaker 1: act like their social distancing so they want to get

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Speaker 1: in trouble. But yeah, officials for the Olympics. I didn't

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Speaker 1: even realize it kicked off this Friday. I don't care

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Speaker 1: about the Summer Olympics. I don't care about any Olympics. Actually,

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Speaker 1: you guys don't watch it, like the ceremony and stuff. No, no,

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Speaker 1: it's awesome. It's usually like huge you know, fireworks, like

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Speaker 1: artist before me hear about fireworks, don't. You don't like

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Speaker 1: to hear about the artist performing? No? No, its likely.

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Speaker 1: The only time that I'll watch the Olympics is when

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Speaker 1: they have the weird events. Oh, what like equestrian and stuff. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I'll watch the equestrian or um if it's the Winter Olympics.

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Speaker 1: I like the I don't know what it is, but

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Speaker 1: what it's called the ski and they shoot, Yeah, they

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Speaker 1: ski and shoot. Yeah okay. And but my favorite Summer

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Speaker 1: Olympic event isn't is none of the track and field stuff,

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Speaker 1: but it's the speed walking. Oh that's amazing. Those people.

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Speaker 1: It's like they're competitive, they're super competitive, and holy hip problems.

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Speaker 1: They shake back and forth. They probably can't also real good,

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Speaker 1: they probably can't. It's amazing to watch them walk though.

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Speaker 1: And I don't know how that became an actual sport.

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Speaker 1: That was a guyall walkers. That was a guy who

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Speaker 1: couldn't run. That was like, what can I do? A girl.

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Speaker 1: It was a girl. Was it a go? I don't know,

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Speaker 1: but why would it be a guy? Either way? I

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Speaker 1: like watching. I like watching the speed walkers. I think

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Speaker 1: that's my favorite Olympic event. Fun to watch, it is

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Speaker 1: fun to watch. Maybe we should just do that. Maybe

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Speaker 1: we should do that. We should Friday. We should just

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Speaker 1: do it on the office. There's nobody here, there's big

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Speaker 1: long hallways. We could time a lap. We couldn't have

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Speaker 1: a lap socket. Okay, I'm going right now, organize, organize

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Speaker 1: the event. We'll have a speed walk competition on Friday

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Speaker 1: for the opening ceremony to celebrate the opening speeds though,

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Speaker 1: we have to have either a judge around a corner

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Speaker 1: or a camera because there's a sideway no one can see.

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Speaker 1: We'll get it all. I don't want any cheating. Well,

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Speaker 1: you can't go over there because they're they're doing constructions.

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Speaker 1: We got to stay on this side. But we can

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Speaker 1: do like a little wrap around. I'll show you. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: there's a lap we need um. Okay, so we need

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Speaker 1: to get our uniforms and judges, judges, shoes, Yeah, walking shoes,

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Speaker 1: good walking shoes, Fannie packs, and we need some bike shorts. Yes, yes,

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Speaker 1: all right, So we'll get all that. So I have

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Speaker 1: the bike shorts, I'll let you guys borrow some, okay, sweet,

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Speaker 1: I will compete. I will knee on color. I'm going

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Speaker 1: to start practicing right now. A text in four one

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Speaker 1: oh six one. Who do you think is gonna win

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Speaker 1: in the first ever twenty twenty one speed walk off

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Speaker 1: speed Walking Challenge Olympic Game, Open Olympic Game. That's a

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Speaker 1: perfect title, I think