WEBVTT - Conversations with... My Sister 0:00:02.360 --> 0:00:14.360 This is Conversations with Olivia Jade and I Heart Radio Podcast. Okay, everybody, 0:00:14.400 --> 0:00:20.079 welcome back to conversations with your host A Ka me A, 0:00:20.239 --> 0:00:26.759 k Olivia Jade. You guys, today, I have my favorite 0:00:26.760 --> 0:00:30.160 person in the planet. Um did I say in the planet? 0:00:30.920 --> 0:00:33.680 I meant to say on the planet. My favorite person 0:00:33.720 --> 0:00:36.880 on the planet my best friend, my big sister. If 0:00:36.920 --> 0:00:39.000 you guys have been following me for a while, you 0:00:39.080 --> 0:00:42.159 know Bella from my YouTube channel and we used to 0:00:42.200 --> 0:00:43.839 post a lot of stuff on there when we were 0:00:43.840 --> 0:00:47.480 in our like early teenage years to mid teenage years, 0:00:47.840 --> 0:00:50.159 and now we're both in our early twenties and I 0:00:50.159 --> 0:00:52.159 don't think you guys have really seen or heard from 0:00:52.159 --> 0:00:55.440 my sister in a few years. So with all of 0:00:55.480 --> 0:00:59.360 that being said, please welcome my big sister, Bella said 0:00:59.560 --> 0:01:05.080 was up was a big guys. Bella is a year 0:01:05.120 --> 0:01:07.720 older than me. We're twelve months twelve days apart to 0:01:07.840 --> 0:01:10.960 the tea, and I think before we jump into this conversation, 0:01:11.000 --> 0:01:12.920 we kind of talked about certain things we want to 0:01:12.920 --> 0:01:15.240 touch on and uh, things we want to be open 0:01:15.280 --> 0:01:17.440 with you guys about, and just some things that I 0:01:17.520 --> 0:01:19.560 think you guys can relate to and Also, I did 0:01:19.600 --> 0:01:22.320 a little Instagram pole and asked you guys to ask 0:01:22.400 --> 0:01:24.160 us some questions. So we're going to do some of 0:01:24.160 --> 0:01:27.759 those as well. But I first want to introduce Bela 0:01:27.880 --> 0:01:29.600 and so you guys get to know her a little 0:01:29.600 --> 0:01:32.000 bit and what she's been up to the last few years. 0:01:32.760 --> 0:01:36.120 You started writing a script with her really great friend Jamie, 0:01:36.120 --> 0:01:39.240 who went to n y U for theater, right, And 0:01:39.560 --> 0:01:42.199 I think from kind of what like we've talked about, 0:01:42.640 --> 0:01:45.520 Bella basically started journaling I would say, like two and 0:01:45.520 --> 0:01:47.720 a half years ago, right when we really went through 0:01:47.720 --> 0:01:49.680 our family stuff. I think that was kind of her 0:01:49.760 --> 0:01:53.280 outlet to like express her emotions basically, And so I 0:01:53.280 --> 0:01:55.279 think it started with you journaling and kind of getting 0:01:55.400 --> 0:01:58.440 back into writing, especially because we hadn't been in school 0:01:58.480 --> 0:01:59.960 for quite some time, so it's not like we had 0:02:00.000 --> 0:02:02.600 to do papers anymore. So I think you kind of 0:02:02.640 --> 0:02:05.120 got back into writing by like starting with your emotions. 0:02:05.160 --> 0:02:07.600 And then I think you thought, you know, even though 0:02:07.600 --> 0:02:09.360 everything that had happened, and we can touch on this 0:02:09.400 --> 0:02:11.720 in a little bit too, but you kind of felt 0:02:11.760 --> 0:02:14.519 like this was a new passion or maybe an old 0:02:14.520 --> 0:02:16.960 passion that was like re sparked from an emotional like 0:02:17.040 --> 0:02:19.400 journaling standpoint, and then you guys got into script writing 0:02:19.480 --> 0:02:22.920 right sort of kind of yeah, pretty much, but it 0:02:23.000 --> 0:02:25.920 really was Jamie coming back to l A and being like, 0:02:26.000 --> 0:02:28.360 I want to just try and write something, and I 0:02:28.440 --> 0:02:30.200 was like, I'm down to write it with you. And 0:02:30.240 --> 0:02:32.160 since we were in she's been my best friend since 0:02:32.160 --> 0:02:33.919 I was five and since we were in high school, 0:02:33.919 --> 0:02:37.040 we always talked about how but it would be to 0:02:37.080 --> 0:02:39.200 create a show kind of based on growing up in 0:02:39.360 --> 0:02:43.639 l A, but more accurate than nine O two and 0:02:43.760 --> 0:02:46.160 No was because nine O two and No is a 0:02:46.240 --> 0:02:50.840 very well, it's like a cub show that very scripted, 0:02:51.080 --> 0:02:53.320 but it's not. This show is scripted too, but it's 0:02:53.360 --> 0:02:56.840 just not The teenagers don't talk like teenagers do, and 0:02:56.880 --> 0:02:59.360 they don't because it's written by grown men, so they 0:02:59.400 --> 0:03:02.120 don't have the same experiences to girls growing up in 0:03:02.240 --> 0:03:04.320 l A and actually understanding the ins and outs of 0:03:04.440 --> 0:03:07.000 l A. So we just decided to start writing that 0:03:08.200 --> 0:03:13.160 and it kind of it was almost a joke at first, 0:03:13.160 --> 0:03:14.520 and then it kind of took off and we both 0:03:14.600 --> 0:03:16.280 enjoyed it so much. And then we have a friend 0:03:16.320 --> 0:03:19.639 who's a writer and he helped us because we neither 0:03:19.680 --> 0:03:22.640 of us have taken screenwriting classes or anything, and he 0:03:22.720 --> 0:03:26.040 kind of helped us formulate the script and learned that 0:03:26.240 --> 0:03:28.239 he gave us like a mini master class on writing. 0:03:28.480 --> 0:03:32.080 So he helped us like create the ideas and make 0:03:32.080 --> 0:03:34.160 them flow together and actually be able to tell a story. 0:03:34.760 --> 0:03:39.040 And we started just writing about loosely based off of 0:03:39.120 --> 0:03:41.400 things we've been through, and the idea of the story 0:03:41.480 --> 0:03:49.480 is to touch upon how although that problems are relative 0:03:49.760 --> 0:03:53.240 and I the thing I love about acting and storytelling 0:03:53.240 --> 0:03:55.560 itself is that you get to play a character and 0:03:55.600 --> 0:03:58.040 you get to learn about them and their ins and outs, 0:03:58.080 --> 0:04:00.560 and you can play There's just a wide range and 0:04:00.600 --> 0:04:03.200 there's a wide range of people on this earth. So 0:04:03.280 --> 0:04:08.440 being able to write a story on something that like 0:04:08.560 --> 0:04:12.640 we've been we've gone through ourselves was very cool and 0:04:12.680 --> 0:04:16.760 it also kind of taught me a lot about myself 0:04:16.800 --> 0:04:19.040 and everything too, because we were able to access these 0:04:19.320 --> 0:04:22.000 emotions and create scenes around things that we were feeling 0:04:22.000 --> 0:04:25.599 at the time, and boys and like we do a 0:04:25.640 --> 0:04:28.800 scene from elementary school when we're like twelve, and we 0:04:28.880 --> 0:04:31.400 do all these different things and it was funny. We 0:04:31.440 --> 0:04:33.040 got to reminisce on the past and then we also 0:04:33.080 --> 0:04:35.400 got to like it's very cathartic. We got to work 0:04:35.440 --> 0:04:39.280 through our own and our favorite thing about story writing 0:04:39.279 --> 0:04:41.480 and storytelling is you get to create your own endings. 0:04:42.040 --> 0:04:44.000 It happens the way you wanted to happen, like the 0:04:44.040 --> 0:04:45.800 perfect version in your head. You get to put that 0:04:45.839 --> 0:04:48.320 on paper, and even though it doesn't happen in real life, 0:04:48.360 --> 0:04:52.919 there's something fun knowing that that story lives on in 0:04:53.640 --> 0:04:58.520 a different world, different world completely Um Okay, Well, I 0:04:58.560 --> 0:05:00.840 think that gives you guys like a unroll idea of 0:05:00.920 --> 0:05:02.960 what the script is sort of about. But basically, like 0:05:03.040 --> 0:05:05.000 I've read it, it's really really good. I hope it 0:05:05.040 --> 0:05:06.880 gets picked up and you guys can actually work on 0:05:06.920 --> 0:05:09.920 this and make this and this audience will for sure 0:05:10.000 --> 0:05:12.560 tune in once that happens. But that's down the line. 0:05:12.560 --> 0:05:13.880 But I just wanted to give you guys a little 0:05:13.880 --> 0:05:16.880 bit of a background backstory on what Bella has been 0:05:16.960 --> 0:05:19.320 up to. So she is an acting school. You said 0:05:19.360 --> 0:05:22.440 you didn't take screenwriting class, but she's been taking theater 0:05:22.480 --> 0:05:24.599 in a conservatory for like a year and a half, 0:05:24.600 --> 0:05:27.000 almost two years. But you also have been acting since 0:05:27.040 --> 0:05:29.120 you were like fifteen, Because I remember we used to 0:05:29.160 --> 0:05:33.839 do this young acting academy called Cynthia Baines's studio, and 0:05:34.440 --> 0:05:36.440 I quit after like a week of being there because 0:05:36.680 --> 0:05:40.040 they gave you. They gave her a scene from Oh No, 0:05:40.120 --> 0:05:42.440 I'm forgetting what the Matt Damon and Ben Affle like movie? 0:05:43.080 --> 0:05:45.320 I don't remember. I just don't. How about them apples? 0:05:45.640 --> 0:05:47.280 Good Will Hunting? They gave you the scene from good 0:05:47.279 --> 0:05:50.080 Will Hunting and it scared you and you never came back. 0:05:50.120 --> 0:05:52.920 I was I was like fourteen or fifteen, maybe sixteen, 0:05:53.040 --> 0:05:54.760 and you were fifteen and I was sixteen. No, we 0:05:54.760 --> 0:05:57.040 were fourteen and fifteen because we couldn't drive yet. Yeah, 0:05:57.080 --> 0:06:00.120 but anyway, I was not down for that scene. It's 0:06:00.120 --> 0:06:02.560 like a very sexual, romantic scene with the other guy 0:06:02.680 --> 0:06:05.000 in the class, and I just after that, I was like, 0:06:05.120 --> 0:06:07.400 this is not for me. I cannot put myself into 0:06:07.440 --> 0:06:08.960 that type of character. And that was kind of the 0:06:09.040 --> 0:06:11.120 end of my acting days. But Bell has been really 0:06:11.160 --> 0:06:13.520 into it for quite some time, and so it's been 0:06:13.520 --> 0:06:15.279 really cool seeing you, like the last few years, like 0:06:15.400 --> 0:06:18.320 really dive into it and put yourself kind of like 0:06:18.480 --> 0:06:23.440 fully into that acting mode. Following a mom's footsteps. Um, 0:06:23.560 --> 0:06:25.800 so I kind of want to segue because when I 0:06:25.839 --> 0:06:30.520 asked on Instagram, a lot of the questions or topics 0:06:30.560 --> 0:06:33.320 that people ask just about where everything that's happened, you know, 0:06:33.360 --> 0:06:36.039 in the last few years in our family, And I 0:06:36.200 --> 0:06:40.920 just wanna start by saying, I think the promise I've 0:06:40.960 --> 0:06:43.520 made to myself is I really want to be open 0:06:43.720 --> 0:06:46.000 on this podcast. I want to be vulnerable. I think 0:06:46.000 --> 0:06:49.480 that really helps people, whether we're in completely different situations 0:06:49.560 --> 0:06:51.080 or you can relate to a certain piece of what 0:06:51.120 --> 0:06:54.359 we're talking about. Um, I think it's just really important 0:06:54.400 --> 0:06:58.120 that I am honest. But I don't want my honesty 0:06:58.200 --> 0:07:02.960 to be mistaken as me ever trying to victimize us 0:07:03.080 --> 0:07:05.360 or what happened in the last few years, because I 0:07:05.400 --> 0:07:08.360 think with so much time and so much thought and um, 0:07:08.400 --> 0:07:11.559 everything that's happened, like we both have a really clear 0:07:11.600 --> 0:07:15.320 perspective on that, like we were are, like this situation was, 0:07:16.120 --> 0:07:17.960 like we can just say that we're in the wrong, 0:07:18.040 --> 0:07:20.000 And so I don't want that to ever be no 0:07:20.000 --> 0:07:22.080 matter what the details are, what people do and don't know, Like, 0:07:22.120 --> 0:07:24.720 I don't want that generic kind of topic to be 0:07:24.760 --> 0:07:27.640 twisted that I'm sitting here asking about like mental health 0:07:27.680 --> 0:07:29.240 and what we went through the last few years and 0:07:29.240 --> 0:07:32.240 people saying like, are they seriously like complaining about this? Like, 0:07:32.600 --> 0:07:35.400 you know what I mean, I don't think it would be. 0:07:36.520 --> 0:07:37.840 I don't know how to phrase this because I don't 0:07:37.840 --> 0:07:40.080 want to take away other people's thoughts. But if you 0:07:40.080 --> 0:07:42.600 really think about it in a grand scheme of life 0:07:42.720 --> 0:07:45.840 type thing, it's not complaining. It's using the experience as 0:07:45.920 --> 0:07:47.920 we have. You only live one life, you only get 0:07:47.920 --> 0:07:50.440 a certain path yourself. You can't put yourself in someone 0:07:50.440 --> 0:07:53.120 else's shoes, so you have to take what you've been 0:07:53.160 --> 0:07:56.239 through and learn from that. And that's what talking about 0:07:56.280 --> 0:08:01.360 it and working through it does. And we this is 0:08:01.360 --> 0:08:03.400 the situation. These are the cards we were dealt, So 0:08:03.920 --> 0:08:06.840 to just not talk about it seems wrong in a 0:08:06.880 --> 0:08:10.000 way because it has made us. But it's definitely affected 0:08:10.080 --> 0:08:12.080 us a lot. It's affected us, and it's also taught 0:08:12.120 --> 0:08:15.760 us different things and opened our eyes to new like 0:08:16.040 --> 0:08:19.760 perspectives and things we didn't even think about before. And 0:08:20.640 --> 0:08:23.320 it's we're not talking about it to garner pity or 0:08:24.040 --> 0:08:27.040 be the victims in a situation, but it is really 0:08:27.560 --> 0:08:29.320 life and what we went through, so it would be 0:08:30.320 --> 0:08:33.280 weird to just not talk about it at all. So 0:08:33.320 --> 0:08:36.080 a lot of fans were messaging and just asking, you know, 0:08:36.160 --> 0:08:38.040 like what the last few years have looked like and 0:08:38.120 --> 0:08:42.760 how it's been going through everything that happened in our family. 0:08:42.960 --> 0:08:45.839 And I also want to say that there's a lot 0:08:45.880 --> 0:08:48.080 of stuff that I wish, like, especially now that because 0:08:48.080 --> 0:08:50.280 we haven't done any like interviews together, like this is 0:08:50.320 --> 0:08:52.160 our first time, like me and you just talking and 0:08:52.160 --> 0:08:55.280 like just being open and UM, there's so much I 0:08:55.280 --> 0:08:57.680 would like to say and clear up and go through 0:08:57.720 --> 0:09:00.320 every single thing that's ever been written imposed about us 0:09:00.360 --> 0:09:02.560 and be like that's not true or this came from that, 0:09:02.720 --> 0:09:08.680 or um, just explain like quote unquote, like I don't 0:09:08.679 --> 0:09:11.720 know how to put this, but just like at the time, 0:09:11.840 --> 0:09:15.000 what like we thought was going on or stuff like that. 0:09:15.040 --> 0:09:17.800 But we literally can't because it is a federal case 0:09:17.960 --> 0:09:20.520 and I don't feel like messing with the government. So 0:09:21.040 --> 0:09:23.000 I want to kind of focus on where we've been 0:09:23.160 --> 0:09:26.400 mental health wise and kind of taking care of that 0:09:26.480 --> 0:09:29.520 and how it's affected us. Because I also think besides 0:09:29.679 --> 0:09:32.440 just the legal side of things, like that's something that 0:09:32.559 --> 0:09:34.440 I know a lot of young girls and boys and 0:09:34.480 --> 0:09:39.160 people listening can relate to, um, whether like regardless of 0:09:39.160 --> 0:09:41.360 your situation. I know that everybody, like a lot of 0:09:41.400 --> 0:09:44.040 people go through mental health, and I think for me, 0:09:44.160 --> 0:09:47.800 mine was very situational. What about for you, I know, 0:09:48.000 --> 0:09:49.680 well I know all of this, but like you've always 0:09:49.679 --> 0:09:52.480 struggled a little bit with like anxiety. Yeah, I've always 0:09:52.640 --> 0:09:58.000 had a bit of anxiety. Um ironically enough, I realized 0:09:58.040 --> 0:10:00.920 it when I was going to college. I remember the 0:10:01.000 --> 0:10:04.720 first night before I left to go move into the dorms. 0:10:04.760 --> 0:10:06.800 I was mom and dad were out at dinner and 0:10:06.880 --> 0:10:10.120 it was me, you and your high school boyfriend. And 0:10:10.200 --> 0:10:12.839 then I remember I was trying to fall asleep, like 0:10:12.880 --> 0:10:14.360 get a good night's sleep. I had moved in day 0:10:14.360 --> 0:10:18.000 the next day, and like I woke up like hyperventilating 0:10:18.000 --> 0:10:19.520 and my heart was beating really fast, and I ran 0:10:19.559 --> 0:10:22.000 downstairs to you and Tie and I was like, I'm 0:10:22.040 --> 0:10:23.520 I'm having a heart attack. I'm having a heart atack. 0:10:23.520 --> 0:10:25.240 I'm having a heart attack, and Tyler was like, no, 0:10:25.280 --> 0:10:26.520 you're not, You're not, You're not. I'm like, I just 0:10:26.600 --> 0:10:28.280 I looked it up web MD said it I'm having 0:10:28.280 --> 0:10:29.400 a heart attack, Like I need to go to the 0:10:29.440 --> 0:10:31.400 hospital right now. And it turned out I was just 0:10:31.440 --> 0:10:34.120 having like a really bad panic attack and it's the 0:10:34.160 --> 0:10:39.240 same exact um symptoms as not symptoms. I don't know that. Yeah, 0:10:39.400 --> 0:10:42.360 I get what you're saying, a heart attack. And that's 0:10:42.360 --> 0:10:44.000 when I realized it. And I remember when I would 0:10:44.200 --> 0:10:46.520 even like sleep in the dorms, I would be like 0:10:46.640 --> 0:10:50.320 falling asleep and then I would wake up hyperventilating and 0:10:50.320 --> 0:10:53.960 like freaking out for I was asleep, Like I don't know, 0:10:54.000 --> 0:10:56.839 but I guess like that's when my anxiety like manifested most. 0:10:56.920 --> 0:10:58.520 Is like right as I was falling to sleep, I 0:10:58.520 --> 0:11:01.680 would like come up like gas spring for air and 0:11:02.520 --> 0:11:05.720 kind of I've always been like a little ball of anxiety. 0:11:05.720 --> 0:11:08.080 Even when I was younger, like I didn't speak a lot, 0:11:08.160 --> 0:11:10.240 I was very shy just because I was so scared. 0:11:10.480 --> 0:11:12.360 I've grown out of it, I guess kind of with 0:11:12.440 --> 0:11:16.400 everything that's also happened, I realized, like you can't like 0:11:16.520 --> 0:11:19.640 let anxiety rule your life. But I remember that was 0:11:19.679 --> 0:11:22.400 there was a lot of it was hard to like 0:11:22.600 --> 0:11:24.920 talk and you were always like super talkative and like 0:11:25.280 --> 0:11:27.240 you were like the social, outgoing one, and I was 0:11:27.280 --> 0:11:30.480 like always just like standing there like behind not saying 0:11:30.480 --> 0:11:33.720 anything because I was scared. Yeah, well that's so normal. 0:11:33.760 --> 0:11:36.480 And I know so many people can definitely relate to that, 0:11:36.559 --> 0:11:38.560 and I feel like, you know, what's funny, I think 0:11:38.600 --> 0:11:41.720 for me, I had and I mean I never really 0:11:41.760 --> 0:11:45.559 had anxiety growing up, because I even remember, ironically, when 0:11:45.600 --> 0:11:47.559 I got to college and I said to one of 0:11:47.600 --> 0:11:51.440 my really good friends there, Olivia, who's still like a 0:11:51.520 --> 0:11:54.280 sister and best friend to this day, but I was 0:11:54.400 --> 0:11:57.400 and she has anxiety too, like most people, and so 0:11:57.440 --> 0:11:59.960 I was talking to her and she was like, how 0:12:00.080 --> 0:12:01.840 anxiety about something? And I was like, what does that 0:12:01.920 --> 0:12:04.240 feel like? Like? What is that? Cut to literally six 0:12:04.280 --> 0:12:07.800 months later, everything erupted and exploded and I was like, oh, 0:12:07.800 --> 0:12:09.600 this is what she was talking about six months ago, 0:12:09.679 --> 0:12:11.760 and it kind of started to make sense to me. 0:12:11.800 --> 0:12:14.000 But I feel lucky that I didn't have it like 0:12:14.120 --> 0:12:16.319 growing up, and I got to really have like a clear, 0:12:16.880 --> 0:12:18.959 I feel like understanding of who I was without letting 0:12:18.960 --> 0:12:21.920 that like kind of fuzz myself at a younger age. 0:12:21.920 --> 0:12:24.720 But now I know that it's like almost hard for 0:12:24.720 --> 0:12:26.840 me to escape it. And that's why my last episode 0:12:26.880 --> 0:12:29.960 on the podcast, I had like that life coach Possibilitarian 0:12:30.080 --> 0:12:31.959 is what she called herself, where she just used the 0:12:32.000 --> 0:12:35.080 world as like anything as possible um come in because 0:12:35.080 --> 0:12:37.040 I was like, I'm very stressed and I need somebody 0:12:37.080 --> 0:12:39.360 that has like actual skills to come break it down 0:12:39.360 --> 0:12:41.280 for me, because I literally never thought I would get 0:12:41.320 --> 0:12:44.200 to this point where I have alopecia, which is an 0:12:44.200 --> 0:12:46.360 autoimmune disease when your head or when your hair falls 0:12:46.440 --> 0:12:49.719 head falls off, when your hair falls out, and it's 0:12:49.760 --> 0:12:51.760 just like shown physically on me. So now I really 0:12:51.840 --> 0:13:09.720 understand it. I feel like I have a question for 0:13:09.760 --> 0:13:11.520 you that I've always kind of wondered. I don't think 0:13:11.520 --> 0:13:16.160 we've really talked about it well for the viewers. The 0:13:16.240 --> 0:13:20.600 first for you when everything was happening, like when we 0:13:20.600 --> 0:13:24.600 were going through the whole thingy thing with our family, 0:13:25.000 --> 0:13:31.360 the thing imaging, what were you feeling, Because I almost wondered, 0:13:31.679 --> 0:13:35.200 not that at the time it was nice being it 0:13:35.280 --> 0:13:37.440 was quite the opposite. It was never like fun or 0:13:37.520 --> 0:13:40.120 enjoyable seeing my name in the headline. And I think 0:13:40.160 --> 0:13:42.760 if I was younger, I would have been like, oh 0:13:42.800 --> 0:13:45.400 my gosh, that's so cool, not the context of what 0:13:45.440 --> 0:13:47.520 was being said, but me being talked about that much, 0:13:47.520 --> 0:13:49.760 I would have been like, wow, like this is amazing. 0:13:49.800 --> 0:13:51.760 But given what it was, and it was also negative, 0:13:51.800 --> 0:13:54.560 and it was very heavily focused on Mom and I. 0:13:55.440 --> 0:13:57.560 What were you kind of feeling like during that time, 0:13:57.600 --> 0:13:59.840 Like did you almost feel like your experience was under 0:13:59.840 --> 0:14:02.360 my mind? Or were you happy to be like out 0:14:02.400 --> 0:14:05.280 of that public like I and you didn't have to 0:14:05.320 --> 0:14:07.000 deal with I mean you had to deal with it, 0:14:07.040 --> 0:14:08.880 but not as on a big of a scale. I 0:14:08.920 --> 0:14:13.280 would say, like the hatred and uh stuff like that. Um, 0:14:13.320 --> 0:14:16.679 there was times where like certain things were going on 0:14:16.760 --> 0:14:19.640 and I was like, I don't feel like what's happening 0:14:19.680 --> 0:14:23.240 to me is being necessarily heard or acknowledged on the 0:14:23.440 --> 0:14:26.520 scale that it should be, just because there was something 0:14:26.520 --> 0:14:30.720 bigger going on at the time. But I think just 0:14:30.760 --> 0:14:35.760 the hardest part of this entire thing was watching how 0:14:37.600 --> 0:14:41.800 horrible or reading and seeing how horrible the media was 0:14:41.880 --> 0:14:45.240 to both you and Mom and actually knowing you guys, 0:14:45.680 --> 0:14:49.360 and knowing Mom has the biggest heart. And can I 0:14:49.360 --> 0:14:51.560 tell my story? My teacher told me, yeah, of course, 0:14:52.240 --> 0:14:55.160 like this is just an example of who our mom is. 0:14:55.320 --> 0:14:58.480 And this story comes from literally last week. I was 0:14:58.640 --> 0:15:01.080 I'm doing a play right now, and the director and 0:15:01.120 --> 0:15:03.240 my teacher pulled me aside after class and he's like, hey, 0:15:03.240 --> 0:15:04.560 can I chat with you for a second, and I 0:15:04.600 --> 0:15:06.200 was like, of course, I thought we were going to 0:15:06.280 --> 0:15:10.000 be discussing the play and my work, but he was like, 0:15:10.320 --> 0:15:13.560 your mom's Laurie Laughlin. And I was like, and sometimes 0:15:13.640 --> 0:15:16.560 that now nowadays that scares me because I'm like, oh, 0:15:16.680 --> 0:15:19.520 oh no, what was what opinion do you have? You know, like, 0:15:20.720 --> 0:15:22.440 and he was like, I just wanted to let you know, 0:15:22.560 --> 0:15:25.320 like one of my first jobs as a young actor 0:15:25.440 --> 0:15:28.160 was on Full House and that cast all of them 0:15:28.160 --> 0:15:31.680 were so so nice, but your mom specifically made sure 0:15:31.720 --> 0:15:34.960 that I felt welcomed, made me comfortable, like made sure 0:15:35.000 --> 0:15:37.920 that I was as comfortable in a new space that 0:15:37.960 --> 0:15:41.120 I can be. And he was telling me that now 0:15:41.160 --> 0:15:43.480 when he works and he does other shows and whatnot, 0:15:43.480 --> 0:15:45.720 when he's a series regular, a guest or whatever, he 0:15:45.760 --> 0:15:48.320 told me that he took what mom taught him that 0:15:48.400 --> 0:15:50.720 day and emulates it on every single set he's on 0:15:50.760 --> 0:15:53.040 to make sure that whoever is there with him feels 0:15:53.400 --> 0:15:56.360 welcomed in that situation. And he said for a young actor, 0:15:56.400 --> 0:15:58.040 he was so scared to even just go and be 0:15:58.120 --> 0:16:00.200 on such a big sitcom at the time, like it 0:16:00.280 --> 0:16:01.520 was huge for him and he was only in a 0:16:01.520 --> 0:16:04.120 few scenes and Mom made him feel so comfortable and 0:16:04.160 --> 0:16:05.960 at home, and it's resonated with him for the last 0:16:06.240 --> 0:16:08.120 thirty years, to the point where he pulled me aside 0:16:08.160 --> 0:16:10.160 and told me, and of course like, I'm like crying 0:16:10.200 --> 0:16:11.880 as he's telling me something that's so sweet. And he 0:16:11.920 --> 0:16:13.880 was even saying like he has other friends in the 0:16:13.880 --> 0:16:15.880 industry who have done guest spots and been on different 0:16:15.920 --> 0:16:18.320 shows that Mom has been on, and across the board 0:16:18.360 --> 0:16:21.200 not I don't think one person who's ever worked with 0:16:21.280 --> 0:16:24.160 Mom can say something bad about her, because she's genuinely 0:16:24.200 --> 0:16:26.720 the nicest person alive. Yeah, I agree. I think that 0:16:26.840 --> 0:16:30.840 was hard for me to like seeing. And this is 0:16:30.840 --> 0:16:32.480 what I was kind of talking about in the beginning, 0:16:32.480 --> 0:16:35.440 where I'm like, I'm not trying to justify or excuse 0:16:35.520 --> 0:16:38.360 behavior or throw a pity party, or because I get 0:16:38.480 --> 0:16:40.600 so nervous and I know this is my podcast and 0:16:40.600 --> 0:16:42.280 I'm not in an interview, and I can be open 0:16:42.280 --> 0:16:44.560 and vulnerable, especially with these guests that are listening, and 0:16:44.600 --> 0:16:47.120 I so appreciate that. But the guests that are listening, 0:16:47.280 --> 0:16:50.040 I did I say the guests. I meant the listeners 0:16:50.080 --> 0:16:52.760 that are listening. Audience, audience, Um, I almost said the 0:16:52.800 --> 0:16:56.080 viewers after that, which also wouldn't have made much sense. Um, 0:16:56.120 --> 0:16:58.800 but I do, I do very heavily relate to like 0:16:58.800 --> 0:17:01.520 those feelings that you were just kind of saying about Mom, 0:17:01.760 --> 0:17:06.399 and um, I think for me, even though I also 0:17:06.520 --> 0:17:10.080 is getting dragged negatively, it like didn't nearly affect me 0:17:10.160 --> 0:17:13.280 as much as like seeing Mom getting first of all, 0:17:13.359 --> 0:17:16.600 having all this throne on her, and I think that 0:17:16.680 --> 0:17:19.080 we can talk about this. I think I want to 0:17:19.119 --> 0:17:24.119 talk about this that um, she really took this whole 0:17:24.160 --> 0:17:27.040 thing and on her back and solely you know, like 0:17:27.080 --> 0:17:29.680 there are a lot of people that were in this case, 0:17:29.760 --> 0:17:31.560 and a lot of other parents, and I do not 0:17:31.680 --> 0:17:34.479 know one other person's name, and I think that for 0:17:34.560 --> 0:17:38.040 being her kid, and you know, all drag myself and 0:17:38.080 --> 0:17:41.440 all rose myself, and I won't forgive myself forever, probably 0:17:41.480 --> 0:17:43.199 and I will always, you know, have that as my 0:17:43.240 --> 0:17:45.760 defense mechanism and partly a little bit of truth. But 0:17:46.240 --> 0:17:48.280 when you see her mom, who's raised you and who's 0:17:48.320 --> 0:17:52.720 been like nothing but a ghost, like the most incredible 0:17:52.760 --> 0:17:56.000 mother in the world, and also just like the kindest heart, 0:17:56.040 --> 0:17:59.040 and like knowing what you know and knowing like how 0:17:59.160 --> 0:18:01.560 much we know about her and how well we know her. 0:18:01.600 --> 0:18:05.280 Obviously we are both directly out of her womb, so 0:18:05.359 --> 0:18:08.200 we know or proudy damn well, pretty damn well. But 0:18:08.560 --> 0:18:11.560 I think that was really hard for me, and UM, 0:18:11.600 --> 0:18:13.840 it was frustrating and it caused a lot of like 0:18:13.920 --> 0:18:16.360 anger within me when I would read stuff about her. 0:18:16.960 --> 0:18:18.720 And I just think it's interesting that when I would 0:18:18.720 --> 0:18:20.720 read stuff about myself, I just didn't really I mean, 0:18:20.720 --> 0:18:23.360 it affected me, I cared, but it didn't nearly affect 0:18:23.359 --> 0:18:26.119 me the same way that UM if I read it 0:18:26.160 --> 0:18:30.959 about our own mom. You know. I also think with 0:18:31.080 --> 0:18:34.800 the media specifically, if you just watch the pattern of 0:18:35.160 --> 0:18:39.280 tabloids in general, they always pick a woman and they 0:18:39.640 --> 0:18:43.240 take her down. I agree. I think women definitely are 0:18:43.480 --> 0:18:45.880 dragged in the media quite often. And I also think 0:18:45.960 --> 0:18:49.320 that besides just women being dragged in the media, I 0:18:49.359 --> 0:18:52.760 think that the media, in my opinion, and I could 0:18:52.800 --> 0:18:56.000 talk about this for ages and I didn't know when 0:18:56.000 --> 0:18:59.239 I would end up talking about this publicly. But I 0:18:59.280 --> 0:19:01.040 feel like the perfect guest to talk about it with 0:19:01.200 --> 0:19:04.080 is my sister, because she's heard a lot of it, 0:19:04.600 --> 0:19:06.720 be she's kind of been through it with me and 0:19:07.040 --> 0:19:10.200 with herself, and I feel like we also just both 0:19:10.240 --> 0:19:11.680 have a lot of opinions on this, and I think 0:19:11.680 --> 0:19:15.119 it would be interesting to touch on um. But for me, 0:19:15.200 --> 0:19:20.680 I just feel like the media is extremely hypocritical, I think, 0:19:21.560 --> 0:19:25.040 regardless of our situation, forget us, I just think in general, 0:19:25.119 --> 0:19:31.280 it's all about preaching this anti bullying, uh, non bandwagon 0:19:31.320 --> 0:19:34.439 effect and how everybody should be so understanding of one another. 0:19:34.880 --> 0:19:37.840 And then you have people like let's say, Megan markele right, 0:19:37.960 --> 0:19:43.159 who's gotten dragged through the media for living basically for 0:19:43.320 --> 0:19:47.280 dating guys exactly, and just we could list a million examples, 0:19:47.280 --> 0:19:50.560 but I do feel like they preach this, oh my gosh, 0:19:50.600 --> 0:19:52.840 like we are so on it, we are so not 0:19:53.800 --> 0:19:57.199 for bullying, We're so against bullying, and and then you 0:19:57.359 --> 0:19:59.400