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Speaker 1: Hello, Hi, my name is Christian. I'm calling on behalf

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Speaker 1: of the University of and I was looking for an

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Speaker 1: Alicia Johnson. This is huh hi, Alicia? How are you?

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Speaker 1: Is this a good time to talk? Sure? Perfect? Well.

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Speaker 1: The university is in the process of fundraising to build

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Speaker 1: a new wing to expand our science department, and I'm

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Speaker 1: calling because I'm hoping I can count on you for

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Speaker 1: a donation. I am so sorry. I hold on one second,

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Speaker 1: hold on, wait a second. Okay, did you just start

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Speaker 1: your sentence with I'm sorry? Yeah, because thing to me

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Speaker 1: that sounds like you're about to say no. Um oh yeah,

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Speaker 1: I am about to say no, especially if you're speaking

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Speaker 1: to me like that. Yeah, that's not gonna cut it. Okay.

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Speaker 1: I don't know if you're some kind of broco or whatever,

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Speaker 1: but you went to this school, so you should donate

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Speaker 1: some money. I am so confused. Who speaks to someone

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Speaker 1: like this when you're asking for money? Um, well, somebody

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Speaker 1: who's passionate and somebody who feels like if you went

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Speaker 1: to this school what you did. Unless I'm mistaken, you

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Speaker 1: went to well, I went to that school. I paid

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Speaker 1: tuition for years. Okay, okay, and I'm sure you got

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Speaker 1: a job out of it. Unless you're living in your parents'

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Speaker 1: basement or something like that, then you have probably have

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Speaker 1: some money. You're asking people on the phone, don't don't

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Speaker 1: criticize my career lifestyle because you're a Joe coopn't have

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Speaker 1: any any social etiquete whatsoever, and you have to be

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Speaker 1: a collection agent. God, you have an attitude problem. Has

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Speaker 1: anybody ever told you that, you know what? I have

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Speaker 1: a problem with somebody going to school taking advantage of

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Speaker 1: it and then not donating, especially when it's a new

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Speaker 1: science department. Do you not care about like carrying cancer

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Speaker 1: or whatever? Like cancer is totally cool with you? Now

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Speaker 1: you're just being a complete and total ass. Yeah, I'm

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Speaker 1: just gonna go ahead. You know that's fine, don't donate.

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Speaker 1: I'll just go ahead and check it down on the

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Speaker 1: list here that you're like four cancer. Suppose you can

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Speaker 1: even dull the freaking buttons on a phone? Not so

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Speaker 1: much an idi at. Let me ask you a question.

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Speaker 1: Do you have a job, Yes, they have a job.

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Speaker 1: Is it a good job? Do you enjoy it? Yeah?

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Speaker 1: I do? Like, are you like just some like dull

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Speaker 1: barista or something like you haven't. Actually, let's go with that. Well,

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Speaker 1: then then then you should appreciate where you came from

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Speaker 1: and the school that taught you to get that job,

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Speaker 1: and maybe donate something instead of just constantly being a broko.

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Speaker 1: First of all, I'm not a broko. Sick of all,

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Speaker 1: I'm not a barista. Okay, I work in pr That's

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Speaker 1: what I do. If you, if your company knew, if

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Speaker 1: you're the school knew you were talking to people like this,

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Speaker 1: it would be mortified, because I pustules later saying that

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Speaker 1: the university is now harreshing people, which rude. Oh my god,

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Speaker 1: re collectors, You're gonna be a little piss. Is this

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Speaker 1: like the normal level of your voice all the time,

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Speaker 1: because you are extremely loud. No, it's not the normal

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Speaker 1: level of my voice. Only when people call and I'm

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Speaker 1: just trying to be complete and see is it that

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Speaker 1: you want money? Do you think that we should maybe

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Speaker 1: give you some money because you're so broken? You I'm not,

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Speaker 1: I'm not struggling any way. Shape before, it's totally okay,

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Speaker 1: it's okay. If you're having problems, you can tell me

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Speaker 1: about it. If you can't, I donate to sunities all

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Speaker 1: the time. I don't want to donate you. I don't

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Speaker 1: even know if you're gonna take give the money to

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Speaker 1: the school. That's fine, No, sweetie, sweetie, it's fine. Not

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Speaker 1: everybody has five dollars to donate. Do you need me

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Speaker 1: to make you some food today? Do you want me

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Speaker 1: to go and pick up some food, a sandwich or something? Yeah?

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Speaker 1: Why don't you go buy lunch? Maybe that's why you're

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Speaker 1: so angry, because you're hungry because you haven't eaten in

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Speaker 1: a week. You think you don't have any money. They

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Speaker 1: have a good job. Okay, I am a functioning adult.

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Speaker 1: I don't know you kind of staying alcoholic? Did you

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Speaker 1: that the problem? You say, you're a functioning alcoholic calling

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Speaker 1: me from your fri parents' basement. Okay, but I think

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Speaker 1: it's that fine. Listen in a dolt, sweetie. If you're

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Speaker 1: functioning alcoholic, there's programs for that too. I want to

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Speaker 1: help you because you're obviously too broke to donate to charity,

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Speaker 1: and I want to help you. You are sche bag. Okay,

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Speaker 1: I don't even know who do this job now, it's

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Speaker 1: all listen. I do part time counseling. Why don't you

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Speaker 1: tell me how you're I feel rible for anyone who

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Speaker 1: has to speak with you. Listen any amount of time.

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Speaker 1: How did your alcoholism? How did your alcoholism get started?

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Speaker 1: Mine started with butt chugging. What chugging? Well, it's where

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Speaker 1: you kind of tilt up and then put the alcohol

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Speaker 1: in your backslide. Oh my god, this is out of control.

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Speaker 1: What is going on? This is actually Jewel from brook

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Speaker 1: and Jewel in the morning. I'm moving ninety two point

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Speaker 1: five doing a phone tap on you. It's a joke.

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Speaker 1: Your brother Jason set you up his favorite phone tap

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Speaker 1: character that I do as Christian, and he wanted him

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Speaker 1: to call you. I'm assuming you've never heard Christian before,

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Speaker 1: but that was him. He's he's just annoying. Hapn he's

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Speaker 1: very past God. I'm going to kill him. Yeah, well,

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Speaker 1: maybe you should try donating some money first before you

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Speaker 1: go killing people. Wake up every morning with Jewel foone

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Speaker 1: tabs weekday mornings on the twenties two point five