WEBVTT - Good Science: Hospice 0:00:00.790 --> 0:00:05.890 The information provided on this podcast is uninformed and unreviewed. 0:00:06.090 --> 0:00:10.150 Good science does not do any research about any of 0:00:10.210 --> 0:00:16.100 the topics discussed and assumes no responsibility for errors or omission. 0:00:27.800 --> 0:00:37.530 That's good science. Greetings and salutations, America. Welcome to another 0:00:37.990 --> 0:00:42.589 episode of Good Science. I'm your host, the Health Secretary 0:00:42.670 --> 0:00:47.199 of the United States, who still has his job, Robert F. 0:00:47.500 --> 0:00:53.260 Kennedy Jr. Today, I'll tell you, we're going to talk 0:00:53.340 --> 0:00:58.760 about an issue that's really sticking in my craw. It's 0:00:58.820 --> 0:01:03.090 the elderly in this country. And why won't they die, 0:01:03.190 --> 0:01:09.670 for God's sake? The old are lingering around, sucking up resources, 0:01:10.250 --> 0:01:15.140 hoarding their money and real estate, and they're not giving 0:01:15.319 --> 0:01:22.320 anything back to us, the youth of America. As a 0:01:22.540 --> 0:01:29.060 young tween, I remember when my father graciously stepped out 0:01:29.100 --> 0:01:33.959 of the way with the aid of a certain Sirhan Sirhan, 0:01:34.480 --> 0:01:38.240 so that I could step into his place as a 0:01:38.440 --> 0:01:43.390 power leader in the Kennedy family. But today, too many 0:01:43.530 --> 0:01:47.850 old people are using hospice as some sort of club bed. 0:01:48.750 --> 0:01:55.060 going into hospice care centers and sometimes spending 5, 6, 7, 8, 0:01:55.060 --> 0:01:57.990 10 years hanging out. 0:01:58.050 --> 0:01:59.590 And not dying. 0:02:00.870 --> 0:02:05.640 In fact, there was a 2022 study that showed that 0:02:05.700 --> 0:02:10.310 the rate of unemployment for deaf doulas is has actually 0:02:10.570 --> 0:02:16.640 doubled in just six years. That means less people are 0:02:17.120 --> 0:02:23.800 exiting stage right, and there's more death doulas on your doorstep. Well, 0:02:24.040 --> 0:02:28.620 to discuss this and more with me is a man 0:02:29.160 --> 0:02:34.290 who could make the Grim Reaper double over in chuckles 0:02:34.630 --> 0:02:37.370 and burst into a pile of bones. 0:02:37.889 --> 0:02:46.620 It's Kyle Clem. Bobby. Wow. Holy woly. What was that about? 0:02:46.660 --> 0:02:49.399 Were you talking about yourself in that intro? Because you're 0:02:49.440 --> 0:02:50.860 a fucking old lady. 0:02:51.020 --> 0:02:54.470 Hey, you better watch it, pal. First off, I'm a man. 0:02:54.570 --> 0:02:55.110 Don't misgender me. 0:02:55.110 --> 0:02:56.630 Let me see up that skirt of yours. 0:02:57.669 --> 0:03:00.410 What's up my skirt? Yeah, what's up that skirt? 0:03:00.450 --> 0:03:02.389 What do you got between those legs, honey? 0:03:02.690 --> 0:03:06.250 Just because I'm wearing an old field hockey skirt from 0:03:06.330 --> 0:03:09.710 a girl who happened to go missing in my class 0:03:10.130 --> 0:03:11.090 the same. 0:03:10.790 --> 0:03:13.970 Year that I found it. Be careful, Bobby. 0:03:14.050 --> 0:03:16.350 What? We're on the air. You don't want to be 0:03:16.370 --> 0:03:17.230 saying this stuff. 0:03:17.630 --> 0:03:21.750 Oh, well, it's just a keepsake or a treasure. 0:03:24.960 --> 0:03:25.790 A peepsake. 0:03:26.070 --> 0:03:27.090 A peepsake. 0:03:27.500 --> 0:03:31.919 But yeah, I'm wearing this old teen girl's field hockey 0:03:32.020 --> 0:03:35.340 skirt because it makes my body Balls get bigger. 0:03:36.280 --> 0:03:38.900 It makes your balls get bigger. Yeah. 0:03:38.980 --> 0:03:40.490 How does that work? 0:03:41.010 --> 0:03:42.610 Is that some old lady shit? 0:03:43.510 --> 0:03:45.330 I'm not an old lady, Kyle. 0:03:45.490 --> 0:03:48.550 I understand that you're doing some sort of routine where 0:03:48.610 --> 0:03:50.370 it's funny to make me an old lady. 0:03:50.390 --> 0:03:52.750 Yeah, I got this old lady routine I do now. 0:03:53.030 --> 0:03:55.400 Yeah, do it for me now, Kyle. 0:03:55.840 --> 0:03:58.840 Okay. There's an old lady thing. 0:03:59.370 --> 0:03:59.710 Yeah. 0:03:59.950 --> 0:04:03.250 And she's like, she falls on the ground or something. 0:04:03.400 --> 0:04:03.920 Right. 0:04:04.180 --> 0:04:07.460 And then like, I don't know, she breaks both her 0:04:07.500 --> 0:04:15.590 knees and she's. I don't know. Tell them about her parents. Well, 0:04:16.130 --> 0:04:18.510 speaking of old ladies, I heard that you went to 0:04:18.529 --> 0:04:22.410 a fab birthday party last night. 0:04:22.650 --> 0:04:24.410 Oh, man, you got to be kidding me. 0:04:24.430 --> 0:04:26.680 No, I'm not. I'm serious. I'm serious. 0:04:27.300 --> 0:04:30.260 Now, that's old-timey saying, Kyle. 0:04:30.640 --> 0:04:30.860 What? 0:04:31.400 --> 0:04:34.960 You gotta be kidding me. When you throw your head 0:04:35.000 --> 0:04:36.520 around a little bit, you go, you. 0:04:36.310 --> 0:04:37.120 Gotta be kidding me. 0:04:37.170 --> 0:04:38.210 You gotta be kidding me. 0:04:38.490 --> 0:04:44.180 Yeah. I mean, listen, Cheryl's mother, Rosemary, turned 105 years 0:04:44.360 --> 0:04:45.280 old last time. 0:04:45.300 --> 0:04:50.120 Jesus Christ. Yeah, and we all had to attend. So 0:04:50.220 --> 0:04:52.790 she was around during Eddie Murphy's time. 0:04:52.850 --> 0:04:57.030 Oh, yeah, she was around during Eddie Murphy's time, during 0:04:57.070 --> 0:05:02.010 the whole period from the beginning of his career all 0:05:02.050 --> 0:05:05.220 the way to Beverly Hills Cop 3 set at that 0:05:05.279 --> 0:05:06.300 amusement park. 0:05:07.360 --> 0:05:10.240 Not sure what you're talking about. Okay, so she turned 105, 0:05:10.240 --> 0:05:12.180 which means Cheryl must be, what, 90? 0:05:12.160 --> 0:05:18.770 No, Cheryl is a ripe young somewhere in the 60s, 0:05:18.850 --> 0:05:19.350 I think. 0:05:19.570 --> 0:05:21.730 I thought you called her a ripe young dinosaur. 0:05:22.029 --> 0:05:26.870 Yeah, she's a ripe young dino. Yeah, but dino for dino-mite, 0:05:27.370 --> 0:05:28.890 not dinosaur. 0:05:29.130 --> 0:05:31.670 Okay, all right. All right, so how was the party? 0:05:31.910 --> 0:05:32.650 Did you fuck? 0:05:32.730 --> 0:05:33.489 Was there coke? 0:05:33.570 --> 0:05:37.270 Well, here's the thing. Yeah, there was coke. 0:05:37.450 --> 0:05:42.750 Caffeine-free Coca-Cola, because those oldies will have a heart attack 0:05:42.910 --> 0:05:45.690 if they have any caffeine in them. 0:05:46.270 --> 0:05:49.310 You hate soda, too, so you must have been disgusted. 0:05:49.529 --> 0:05:52.330 I was. I threw up all over. I threw up. 0:05:52.380 --> 0:05:55.140 The minute I walked in, I power vomited all over 0:05:55.180 --> 0:05:56.500 the birthday cake. 0:05:56.700 --> 0:05:57.880 Did you kill any old people? 0:05:58.580 --> 0:06:01.400 Well, Kyle, this is the interesting thing. I got so 0:06:01.660 --> 0:06:05.940 angry because this was held at a hospice center. Now, 0:06:05.980 --> 0:06:08.920 the last time I checked, a hospice center is a 0:06:08.980 --> 0:06:11.860 place where oldies go to die, not to have a 0:06:11.900 --> 0:06:15.800 big party. In fact, why would a hospice center even 0:06:15.860 --> 0:06:19.820 have a function room? Nobody's supposed to be functioning at 0:06:20.020 --> 0:06:20.719 all in there. 0:06:21.100 --> 0:06:26.470 Okay. And do you get along with this rosemary character. Oh, 0:06:26.810 --> 0:06:28.570 Cheryl's mom. You said, right? 0:06:28.589 --> 0:06:29.530 She's my mother. 0:06:29.570 --> 0:06:33.210 You're technically, she's your grandmother. If she's Cheryl's mom. 0:06:33.310 --> 0:06:36.000 No, that's not how that works. She Cheryl would be 0:06:36.060 --> 0:06:39.540 my mother. Then if Cheryl is your mother, that's crazy. 0:06:39.580 --> 0:06:42.219 So you've been, you've been, no, no, no. 0:06:42.380 --> 0:06:43.420 You have it wrong. 0:06:43.500 --> 0:06:47.210 No, Cheryl is my wife and she was my lover 0:06:47.270 --> 0:06:47.969 and my wife. 0:06:48.070 --> 0:06:50.670 Now she's just my wife and does. He's my lover. 0:06:50.950 --> 0:06:53.230 So because you're having sex with her, she can't be 0:06:53.270 --> 0:06:54.880 your mother. Is that how that works? 0:06:55.250 --> 0:06:57.490 Well, in many States, yes. 0:06:57.750 --> 0:07:00.710 But, uh, of course, you know, if you have the 0:07:00.770 --> 0:07:04.010 story of Oedipus, he has sex with his mother and 0:07:04.910 --> 0:07:06.550 everything turns out fine for him. 0:07:07.610 --> 0:07:10.970 Okay. So I don't want to hear any of that 0:07:11.170 --> 0:07:13.650 Greek bullshit right now, but I do want to know, 0:07:13.680 --> 0:07:17.220 do you get along with Rosemary? 0:07:18.060 --> 0:07:23.770 You know, I'll tell you something. I, uh, old stereotype 0:07:23.850 --> 0:07:28.180 is true. I don't get along with Rosemary. She's always 0:07:28.280 --> 0:07:30.540 come when she used to, she used to live with 0:07:30.620 --> 0:07:34.000 us for a while and she would come in and, 0:07:34.120 --> 0:07:37.130 you know, I have my slippers on one side of 0:07:37.250 --> 0:07:41.630 my easy chair and my paper on the TV tray. 0:07:42.170 --> 0:07:43.190 And I'd come in. 0:07:43.210 --> 0:07:45.650 You got that little nightcap on too, right? And a 0:07:45.710 --> 0:07:46.490 candle in your hand. 0:07:47.010 --> 0:07:49.670 I have a nightcap and a candle. How else am 0:07:49.710 --> 0:07:52.150 I going to see my way around the house at night? 0:07:52.190 --> 0:07:52.410 Right. 0:07:52.890 --> 0:07:53.910 And she'd come in. 0:07:53.930 --> 0:07:59.750 Oh, Bobby, your slippers are in the middle of the room. 0:07:59.950 --> 0:08:01.550 Classic mother-in-law. 0:08:01.570 --> 0:08:05.570 Oh, Bobby, that newspaper has a dog. 0:08:05.310 --> 0:08:08.740 Shit in it. Yeah, it's probably where Cheryl gets it, too. 0:08:08.960 --> 0:08:12.780 Oh, Bobby, get that pillow off my face. 0:08:12.840 --> 0:08:13.900 What are you doing? 0:08:13.940 --> 0:08:16.000 You're pressing too hard. 0:08:16.170 --> 0:08:19.130 So she's complaining when you're trying to put her out 0:08:19.170 --> 0:08:21.369 of her misery. That's not grateful. 0:08:22.350 --> 0:08:25.690 But it's totally ungrateful. I mean, she stinks. Did you 0:08:25.730 --> 0:08:30.410 know that old people actually produce an enzyme that makes 0:08:30.450 --> 0:08:31.980 them stink like old people? 0:08:32.010 --> 0:08:34.890 That's right. I heard about this study. You told me 0:08:34.980 --> 0:08:37.780 about it. So they actually produce an enzyme that makes 0:08:37.820 --> 0:08:40.020 them smell like shit. 0:08:40.140 --> 0:08:40.720 Is that true? 0:08:40.780 --> 0:08:40.860 Yes. 0:08:41.040 --> 0:08:42.260 It's a 2025 study. 0:08:42.340 --> 0:08:43.740 That was disgusting. 0:08:43.780 --> 0:08:48.140 It was done actually by the Army Corps of Engineers, strangely. 0:08:48.860 --> 0:08:53.280 And they wanted to study the structural integrity of oldies skin. 0:08:53.920 --> 0:09:00.360 And they accidentally discovered that old body produces an enzyme 0:09:00.920 --> 0:09:03.980 that makes you stink like shit and piss. 0:09:04.260 --> 0:09:07.880 So basically what you're saying is that old people don't actually, 0:09:08.040 --> 0:09:09.620 they shit out of their skin. 0:09:09.820 --> 0:09:10.300 Yeah. 0:09:10.420 --> 0:09:12.880 At a certain point, once you get hit a certain age. 0:09:13.160 --> 0:09:17.120 Right. You are a shit bag. You're a cheesecloth. 0:09:17.140 --> 0:09:20.610 You've got shit and your skin is so porous that 0:09:20.630 --> 0:09:22.429 the shit just comes out of the cheesecloth. 0:09:23.250 --> 0:09:26.640 If you give an old person a twist, brown liquid 0:09:26.820 --> 0:09:27.719 comes out. 0:09:28.220 --> 0:09:30.470 Like a towel. Like a towel. 0:09:30.550 --> 0:09:31.209 That's incredible. 0:09:31.230 --> 0:09:34.080 And it smells, and if you lick it, it doesn't taste. 0:09:33.860 --> 0:09:36.880 Like- All right, I don't want- That's disgusting. I don't 0:09:36.920 --> 0:09:37.520 want to lick anything. 0:09:37.540 --> 0:09:41.100 So it was a terrible birthday, and she's still alive, 0:09:41.300 --> 0:09:45.610 and I've decided this is a federal mandate I'm laying 0:09:45.670 --> 0:09:49.630 down right now. We are- If old people don't start 0:09:49.690 --> 0:09:54.040 dying fast in hospices- We'll do something about it. 0:09:54.059 --> 0:09:57.120 Well, you're lucky because I have the opposite problem of you. 0:09:57.140 --> 0:10:00.260 And that's my grandma, you know, or God bless. her 0:10:00.340 --> 0:10:03.200 soul right she takes care of me she has a. 0:10:03.179 --> 0:10:03.700 Soul uh. 0:10:05.950 --> 0:10:09.069 I think so oh i i mean i don't know 0:10:09.090 --> 0:10:13.390 uh what a soul really is but i assume so 0:10:13.570 --> 0:10:17.339 everyone's got a soul right But she, my grandma took 0:10:17.380 --> 0:10:21.720 a spill. She fell. Because she's super bad. Yeah. I mean, 0:10:21.760 --> 0:10:26.370 it happened after, like, sort of like coincidentally after I 0:10:26.420 --> 0:10:32.150 pushed her. Oh, interesting. But she's called my sunglasses stupid. 0:10:32.170 --> 0:10:35.070 I got new sunglasses, new Ray-Bans, and she called them stupid. 0:10:35.150 --> 0:10:37.130 And then suddenly she fell. 0:10:37.150 --> 0:10:37.250 Right. 0:10:38.000 --> 0:10:39.490 Oh, okay. 0:10:39.570 --> 0:10:41.729 So just to break it down, so you got some 0:10:41.809 --> 0:10:45.470 new Ray-Bans, which are stupid-looking glasses. 0:10:46.150 --> 0:10:48.710 Okay, I wouldn't say that around me if I were you. 0:10:49.210 --> 0:10:51.510 Oh, I mean, you said it, right? 0:10:51.840 --> 0:10:54.720 I'm just saying I call that a transgression. I label 0:10:54.740 --> 0:10:57.420 that a transgression in my head. 0:10:57.540 --> 0:10:58.679 I'm sorry, but you know what? 0:10:58.820 --> 0:11:02.000 I don't want to be playing sports with anyone who's 0:11:02.040 --> 0:11:03.930 doing transgressions, okay? 0:11:04.700 --> 0:11:05.000 Okay. 0:11:05.220 --> 0:11:08.800 I don't need my daughter going to play sports with 0:11:08.880 --> 0:11:11.280 people doing transgressions, all right? 0:11:11.340 --> 0:11:14.360 I'm just saying you fucked up, Bobby, okay? 0:11:14.640 --> 0:11:17.360 I wasn't even there. Don't look at me, pal. 0:11:17.580 --> 0:11:19.880 I wasn't even there. You just remember that, that you 0:11:19.900 --> 0:11:23.679 have transgressed, and you will get your comeuppance, just like 0:11:23.740 --> 0:11:25.780 my grandma did coincidentally. 0:11:25.880 --> 0:11:27.380 Oh, my God. What are you? 0:11:27.400 --> 0:11:31.080 I feel like you're Hannibal Lecter getting into my mind 0:11:31.160 --> 0:11:33.110 and somehow convincing me that I committed the crime. 0:11:33.120 --> 0:11:36.270 Just be careful as well, sir. Anyway, so we're putting 0:11:36.330 --> 0:11:37.450 her in hospice now. 0:11:38.090 --> 0:11:39.309 Oh, well, good luck. 0:11:39.470 --> 0:11:41.250 You'll have her for the next 10 years. 0:11:42.470 --> 0:11:45.270 Well, I did. That's why I kind of wanted to 0:11:45.309 --> 0:11:47.929 talk to you about this subject is because my grandmother's 0:11:47.970 --> 0:11:49.170 going into hospice. 0:11:49.429 --> 0:11:50.120 I love that. 0:11:50.760 --> 0:11:54.300 And I wanted to talk about what is that? What 0:11:54.380 --> 0:11:58.460 is hospice? Because I heard the doctor say she needs 0:11:58.500 --> 0:12:01.980 to go in there. Does that mean that she's going 0:12:02.040 --> 0:12:03.830 to stay with me still? 0:12:05.120 --> 0:12:07.760 No, it's the opposite, Kyle. 0:12:07.900 --> 0:12:11.780 So first off, I love this because your grandma took 0:12:11.830 --> 0:12:16.570 an accidental spill, not at all by your hand, despite 0:12:16.730 --> 0:12:20.209 you getting enraged and shoving her because she said your 0:12:20.250 --> 0:12:23.780 glasses look stupid, which I bet they did. Hey. 0:12:24.780 --> 0:12:28.179 And I'm just going to tell you that I also. 0:12:31.390 --> 0:12:35.860 Decided that Cheryl's mother will remain in hospice, this is 0:12:35.920 --> 0:12:38.920 like you and I are like Lady and the Tramp 0:12:39.020 --> 0:12:43.400 eating the pasta together, and we're about to kiss the topic, 0:12:43.780 --> 0:12:49.060 which is hospice. Hospice? 0:12:49.800 --> 0:12:50.880 What is hospice? 0:12:51.300 --> 0:12:55.050 Well, it's a spicy version of going to the hospital. 0:12:55.350 --> 0:12:56.470 It's right in the name. 0:12:57.110 --> 0:12:57.700 You see, if you. 0:12:59.390 --> 0:13:00.620 Look at a hospital. 0:13:00.640 --> 0:13:04.940 A hospital's drab and boring, and you get treated by doctors. Mild. 0:13:04.960 --> 0:13:06.100 You could even call it mild. 0:13:06.200 --> 0:13:12.440 It's mild. Yeah, you know, Hossmild, maybe. Hossmildable is a hospital. 0:13:13.160 --> 0:13:17.370 But hospice is a spicy, stinky place where the dead 0:13:17.450 --> 0:13:22.610 go to be smothered. Yeah, so hospice started when a 0:13:23.050 --> 0:13:29.170 bunch of nurses... got together and they said, hey, you 0:13:29.190 --> 0:13:29.709 know what? 0:13:29.970 --> 0:13:32.890 These old people, we need to usher this along. 0:13:32.910 --> 0:13:34.530 They fucking reek, essentially. 0:13:34.570 --> 0:13:34.850 They reek. 0:13:34.910 --> 0:13:38.309 They're stinking up the room. They're stinking up the hospital. 0:13:38.350 --> 0:13:39.309 They're taking a bath. 0:13:39.370 --> 0:13:42.559 No one wants to live with a fucking old person. 0:13:42.600 --> 0:13:45.120 That's just the truth. I feel that same way about 0:13:45.160 --> 0:13:47.480 you sometimes. It's like, I don't want to be around you. 0:13:47.540 --> 0:13:50.260 I wish I could put you in some sort of 0:13:50.380 --> 0:13:53.060 closet and For the rest of time. 0:13:53.220 --> 0:13:56.969 No way, man. First off, this is my show, okay? 0:13:56.990 --> 0:13:58.850 This is my show. No, it's your show. 0:13:58.910 --> 0:14:02.640 I'm just saying that there are times when I'm like, 0:14:02.800 --> 0:14:06.120 oh my God, I wish I could just hide this guy. 0:14:06.760 --> 0:14:09.460 No, why would you want to hide me, Kyle? 0:14:09.720 --> 0:14:14.270 Because it's just like annoying to deal with you. Just 0:14:14.290 --> 0:14:16.090 like it's annoying to deal with old people and we 0:14:16.130 --> 0:14:18.770 have to put them somewhere. And you're saying this is 0:14:18.809 --> 0:14:20.650 the spicy hotel that they're going. 0:14:20.710 --> 0:14:25.310 This is the spicy hotel because we'll get back to 0:14:25.450 --> 0:14:28.710 what you said earlier. Cause I could be, I'm so young. 0:14:28.730 --> 0:14:31.890 I'm doing pull-ups. I'm doing pushups. I'm doing a new 0:14:31.950 --> 0:14:33.080 stretching routine. 0:14:33.540 --> 0:14:35.750 I'm doing well. I mean, your hair's gray. You got 0:14:35.850 --> 0:14:37.770 fucking wrinkles. You talk like a horse. 0:14:38.290 --> 0:14:39.750 Phil Donahue's hair was gray. 0:14:39.770 --> 0:14:40.050 He was 40. 0:14:40.050 --> 0:14:41.730 What are you talking about? 0:14:41.750 --> 0:14:45.340 Phil Donahue? What the fuck are you even talking about? 0:14:45.640 --> 0:14:48.860 Phil Donahue. Merv Griffin's hair. He was, you know. 0:14:49.220 --> 0:14:53.050 Stop. Keep going back in time. The oldest person ever 0:14:53.110 --> 0:14:55.650 is Eddie Murphy. So don't go farther than that. 0:14:56.410 --> 0:14:58.140 Merv Griffin was a hell of a talent. 0:14:58.160 --> 0:15:01.140 So what happens when you actually enter hospice? 0:15:01.480 --> 0:15:05.980 So first off, the way that we determine medically if 0:15:06.020 --> 0:15:10.310 you need to enter hospice is you stink, you don't 0:15:10.350 --> 0:15:10.850 know what's. 0:15:10.710 --> 0:15:13.050 Going on, and you start breathing like this. 0:15:13.090 --> 0:15:13.570 You're like.... 0:15:15.550 --> 0:15:18.350 You start breathing like Cosby. 0:15:17.770 --> 0:15:22.810 In his birth bit. Which everybody loves Bill Cosby. And 0:15:23.770 --> 0:15:27.630 he does this bit where his wife is giving birth. 0:15:28.860 --> 0:15:31.240 And he does the breathing and he goes. 0:15:33.080 --> 0:15:35.960 Well, as a comedian, I should definitely look into that. 0:15:36.000 --> 0:15:39.229 But this is only done in America, correct? Internationally, do 0:15:39.250 --> 0:15:42.190 they do crazier shit to old people or do they 0:15:42.230 --> 0:15:44.090 do more normal stuff? 0:15:44.230 --> 0:15:49.790 Well, in Italy, it's called a husser spice. And in England, 0:15:49.870 --> 0:15:52.850 it's called Ye Olde Hot Hospice. 0:15:53.410 --> 0:15:57.400 Okay, so everyone, it's basically like Epcot. You go to 0:15:57.460 --> 0:16:00.840 the hospice, and they're basically doing the stereotypical version of 0:16:00.960 --> 0:16:01.860 that culture. 0:16:02.000 --> 0:16:06.570 You know, interestingly enough, we recently actually, through eminent domain, 0:16:06.730 --> 0:16:11.070 claimed the Epcot Center, and it is now the largest 0:16:11.210 --> 0:16:12.850 hospice in Florida. 0:16:13.330 --> 0:16:17.270 So that big ball is where we're going to stuff 0:16:17.460 --> 0:16:19.060 all the Floridians. 0:16:19.440 --> 0:16:22.340 We're going to stuff all the old Floridians in there, 0:16:22.610 --> 0:16:23.470 and then they get to choose. 0:16:23.530 --> 0:16:24.750 So basically Jewish people. 0:16:25.510 --> 0:16:28.720 Yeah, so it's a big ball filled with Jews. 0:16:29.140 --> 0:16:31.440 Right, we all know Florida's where Jews go to die. 0:16:31.760 --> 0:16:34.360 There's getting too many of them now. Let's put them 0:16:34.400 --> 0:16:35.660 in that big gray ball. 0:16:35.960 --> 0:16:37.740 Yes, yeah. 0:16:38.440 --> 0:16:41.580 And the thing is, is that instead of Epcot Center, 0:16:41.680 --> 0:16:45.210 it's now going to be called the Matzah Ball. So 0:16:45.640 --> 0:16:48.950 it's just a large matzah ball filled with Jews. 0:16:49.070 --> 0:16:52.190 Will it be painted to look like a matzah ball 0:16:52.210 --> 0:16:53.330 or will you keep it metal? 0:16:54.570 --> 0:17:00.010 We're going to use AI, you know, the same technology 0:17:00.090 --> 0:17:04.669 that's currently used on the Vegas Eye. is going to 0:17:04.730 --> 0:17:08.150 be deployed on the Epcot ball. 0:17:08.170 --> 0:17:09.610 The sphere, you mean? 0:17:09.770 --> 0:17:12.500 The Vegas Eye. 0:17:12.540 --> 0:17:14.060 You're calling it the Vegas Eye. 0:17:14.119 --> 0:17:15.730 That's not an eye. That's what they call it. 0:17:15.740 --> 0:17:17.080 No, it's the sphere. 0:17:17.359 --> 0:17:18.600 They call it the eye. 0:17:18.640 --> 0:17:21.879 Jesus Christ, you're getting so fucking old. I'm telling you, 0:17:21.900 --> 0:17:23.179 you're starting to lose. 0:17:22.960 --> 0:17:26.220 It, Bobby. And so they're going to make the digital 0:17:26.710 --> 0:17:30.600 projection of a matzo ball. And so when the Jews 0:17:30.660 --> 0:17:34.880 are brought towards it, they'll be like, oh, this is nice. 0:17:35.260 --> 0:17:37.680 Is that what's going on in the sphere, too? Because 0:17:37.740 --> 0:17:40.840 I hear there's old bands like they have the Backstreet 0:17:40.920 --> 0:17:44.030 Boys playing there. They have, you know, like they have 0:17:44.050 --> 0:17:46.390 Phish playing there. So is that where old bands go 0:17:46.410 --> 0:17:48.189 to die in the Vegas ball? 0:17:48.230 --> 0:17:49.270 Yes, this is. 0:17:49.310 --> 0:17:55.050 So the Vegas ball or I is the hospice for 0:17:55.190 --> 0:18:02.090 old bands. So we're actually, see, we're expanding hospice. And again, 0:18:02.330 --> 0:18:07.370 just to add, so you're breathing heavy, you stink. OK, 0:18:07.450 --> 0:18:08.869 you don't know what's going on. 0:18:09.190 --> 0:18:09.410 Right. 0:18:09.470 --> 0:18:14.590 The hospice nurses are trained to identify when you're going 0:18:14.609 --> 0:18:18.290 to die. And then they go, all right, let's shove 0:18:18.310 --> 0:18:20.470 them in a bed and then watch them breathe heavy 0:18:20.510 --> 0:18:21.430 until they die. 0:18:21.590 --> 0:18:24.440 And then what happens? Are they taken care of or 0:18:24.480 --> 0:18:26.980 they just close the door and leave them in there? 0:18:27.060 --> 0:18:29.320 Is there someone who helps them through the process? 0:18:30.180 --> 0:18:33.179 Yeah, they come in, the nurses come in, and they 0:18:33.220 --> 0:18:36.840 go on either side, and they go, Kalima! 0:18:37.260 --> 0:18:38.760 Kalima! 0:18:39.240 --> 0:18:41.730 And they put their hands on them, and they say 0:18:41.770 --> 0:18:46.750 a bunch of chants, and they lift the body up, 0:18:46.790 --> 0:18:49.170 they raise the body up with their hands. 0:18:51.230 --> 0:18:54.540 They go, out, spirit, out! It's time to go! 0:18:54.560 --> 0:18:58.870 Sort of like they're giving birth. But to their soul. 0:18:59.010 --> 0:19:01.600 They're giving birth to death, which brings us to the 0:19:01.670 --> 0:19:03.500 death doula, Kyle. 0:19:04.040 --> 0:19:05.160 The death doula. 0:19:05.240 --> 0:19:09.120 So you have a birth doula, which is usually some, 0:19:09.180 --> 0:19:12.640 you know, hippie bitch who hasn't shaved her fucking pits 0:19:12.780 --> 0:19:13.220 in 10 weeks. 0:19:13.780 --> 0:19:16.460 Who's there to have you fucking shit your baby. 0:19:16.260 --> 0:19:17.090 Out in a tub. 0:19:17.369 --> 0:19:18.180 Sounds kind of hot. 0:19:18.750 --> 0:19:19.310 Oh, yeah. 0:19:19.730 --> 0:19:22.950 Are you kidding me? There's nothing harder than having sex 0:19:22.970 --> 0:19:25.550 with a mom right after she's given birth, because she's 0:19:25.590 --> 0:19:27.890 the most opened up she'll ever be. 0:19:29.460 --> 0:19:30.160 Jesus Christ. 0:19:30.240 --> 0:19:31.800 And that's a medical fact. 0:19:32.520 --> 0:19:34.300 Okay, you're a rip chaser, I heard. 0:19:34.820 --> 0:19:37.699 Yeah, I'm a rip chaser. You know what I'm talking about? 0:19:38.100 --> 0:19:42.290 Tell me, I really am interested, though, in what happens 0:19:42.790 --> 0:19:46.470 when you die, right? What happens medically when you die, 0:19:46.510 --> 0:19:48.429 when these people go, these old people? 0:19:48.990 --> 0:19:49.750 Okay, so. 0:19:50.020 --> 0:19:53.000 man so the medical you know there's been a number 0:19:53.040 --> 0:19:56.930 of studies uh that have shown that death is not 0:19:57.010 --> 0:20:01.170 maybe a death but a beginning of a deadly life 0:20:01.190 --> 0:20:06.810 so you reincarnated The team here at the CDC has 0:20:06.880 --> 0:20:11.149 actually been studying this. We actually followed a university study 0:20:12.150 --> 0:20:16.990 that was strangely run by Kiefer Sutherland back in the 1980s. Interesting. 0:20:18.410 --> 0:20:23.290 This study was an underground study done by a number 0:20:23.330 --> 0:20:32.010 of medical students, including the very beautiful and sexy– she 0:20:32.050 --> 0:20:36.770 was in Pretty Woman– Uh, and you know her by 0:20:36.810 --> 0:20:40.520 the name of Sabrina Carpenter. 0:20:40.540 --> 0:20:47.359 Uh, she was, uh, uh, uh, what the hell's her name? 0:20:47.380 --> 0:20:48.359 Julia Roberts. 0:20:48.380 --> 0:20:50.140 What's her name? Julia. 0:20:50.440 --> 0:20:52.000 No, no, that's not it. 0:20:52.359 --> 0:20:57.700 Uh, uh. Mikhail Gorbachev. I'm just going to name people 0:20:57.880 --> 0:20:59.220 that I know from history. 0:20:59.240 --> 0:21:01.200 It's Julia Roberts. Yeah. 0:21:01.340 --> 0:21:04.100 Mikhail Gorbachev was in the sequel, Pretty Woman 2. 0:21:04.100 --> 0:21:07.639 That's right. He was the hooker in that one. 0:21:07.730 --> 0:21:08.290 That's right. 0:21:09.590 --> 0:21:14.469 You couldn't make that movie today, Kyle. I'll tell you that. 0:21:14.670 --> 0:21:18.449 I guess he got jizzed on by Grimace. Is that 0:21:18.470 --> 0:21:18.910 what happened? 0:21:19.619 --> 0:21:22.420 Yeah, it was a McDonald's tie-in. It was actually a 0:21:22.800 --> 0:21:27.620