Speaker 1: Hello, Lyle is this are you Simba?
Speaker 2: I'm good. Sorry, I watch a lot of Disney. I
Speaker 2: have a one year old.
Speaker 1: So you have a one year old? Do you Are
Speaker 1: you enjoying being a father?
Speaker 2: Yeah, she's the light in my life. And uh, yeah,
Speaker 2: it's tough though, having a one year old girl. But
Speaker 2: trying to set a good example for her.
Speaker 1: Mm hmm. And what do you what sorts of things
Speaker 1: do you do to set a good example for her?
Speaker 2: Uh, trying to be a good parent, trying to be
Speaker 2: there for when she needs me, and trying to, you know,
Speaker 2: just shield her from the harsh realities of this world.
Speaker 1: Sorry, why is why do you feel as though the
Speaker 1: reality of the world is so harsh?
Speaker 2: Well, there's a lot. I feel like there's a lot
Speaker 2: of good to be found in this world. And her
Speaker 2: mother does a really good job too. And ah, I
Speaker 2: just feel like it's kind of a tough time right now.
Speaker 2: She was a COVID baby, so it's it's funny you
Speaker 2: just never really realize those things until you become a father.
Speaker 1: M And has she been been have you been changing
Speaker 1: her diapers a lot? Has she ever shat on your
Speaker 1: face or anything like that?
Speaker 3: Oh?
Speaker 2: Yeah, she sits all over the place and she shits
Speaker 2: on my hand and but that's okay, but nah, And
Speaker 2: I think her mother wants to have one more too,
Speaker 2: so wish me luck.
Speaker 1: Oh so you want to have another? Well, it says
Speaker 1: here that you believe that your wife is getting bored
Speaker 1: of you. Yeah, definitely, is that something she told you?
Speaker 2: Yeah, like right to my face. And it's funny because
Speaker 2: like she'll like say to me that, like she needs
Speaker 2: someone with big dick energy. And I was like, huh
Speaker 2: at first, I thought that was kind of hurtful, but
Speaker 2: you know, I kind of see what she means, Like
Speaker 2: she wants someone who's confident and relaxed, and that's kind
Speaker 2: of like the opposite of what I am. And if
Speaker 2: I don't do something soon, she's probably gonna try and
Speaker 2: go and find a boyfriend or some shit. I don't know.
Speaker 4: Really, Yeah, it's a lot.
Speaker 1: So she told you that that she is looking for
Speaker 1: somebody with big dick energy.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, yeah, And I feel like, yeah, we kind
Speaker 2: of get on the wrong but sometimes, but she's like
Speaker 2: a she's a witch too, she's a brew ha and
Speaker 2: she like I see her like casting spells and ships.
Speaker 2: So I take what she says very seriously.
Speaker 1: M hmm. Do you believe that she has cast a
Speaker 1: spell upon you?
Speaker 3: Oh?
Speaker 2: Yeah, for sure, definitely. She wants me to just really
Speaker 2: kind of grow a pair and get my fire and
Speaker 2: my drive back because it's really low right now and
Speaker 2: hers is like really high. And yeah, I just feel
Speaker 2: like she's getting kind of bored with me, you know.
Speaker 1: So what kind of spell do you believe she has
Speaker 1: cast upon you?
Speaker 2: You know, it's funny. I actually think they're good stulls.
Speaker 2: Like she brings me a lot of luck too, and
Speaker 2: she gives me a lot of good energy, which is
Speaker 2: why I'm I'm worried, you know, will make her unhappy.
Speaker 2: So and she does want me to kind of go
Speaker 2: to therapy too, but I guess that's another story.
Speaker 1: So she's told you that she is bored of you.
Speaker 1: But how do you feel about her?
Speaker 2: Oh? I think she's the best thing to ever happened
Speaker 2: to me. I feel like, you know, I was really
Speaker 2: lucky to find her, and I feel like she's helped
Speaker 2: me realize a lot of things too, Like there are
Speaker 2: a lot of things that are wrong with me, But
Speaker 2: I feel like I don't maybe do the same for her.
Speaker 2: If you know what I mean.
Speaker 1: What does she helped you realize is wrong with you?
Speaker 2: Well, she kind of made me like take a look
Speaker 2: at like the way I act, you know, And she
Speaker 2: also made me realize that maybe my relationship with my
Speaker 2: mom isn't really the healthiest as well. But it's been
Speaker 2: it's been kind of nice because I've never really I
Speaker 2: didn't really realize that until I was older, and like
Speaker 2: I'm twenty eight and I'm almost thirty, so it's kind
Speaker 2: of weird, like having to kind of realize realize those
Speaker 2: things played in life.
Speaker 5: You know.
Speaker 1: So you like her because well you you said you
Speaker 1: think she's the best thing that's ever happened to you,
Speaker 1: And you were saying that because she's helped you realize
Speaker 1: certain things that are that are amiss with you. I mean,
Speaker 1: what else do you find redeeming and attractive and you know,
Speaker 1: anything else about this person that you feel makes them
Speaker 1: a positive thing to have in your life.
Speaker 2: Well, she's really good at kids. That's the first thing.
Speaker 2: Like I didn't know anything about having kids, and so
Speaker 2: she's been able to kind of show me how to
Speaker 2: set a good example for her daughter. And she's also
Speaker 2: then she's a really good friend to kind of bounce
Speaker 2: things off of. And she helps me like find a
Speaker 2: stable job too. I was having trouble finding work there.
Speaker 2: She's kind of been coaching me a little bit.
Speaker 1: And how how did it feel when she told you
Speaker 1: what she told you?
Speaker 2: It felt really good. I was really lucky to to
Speaker 2: find her, but it made me realize that I still
Speaker 2: have a long way to go, you know.
Speaker 1: So that's well, Well, when when she when she you know,
Speaker 1: I mean, when she when she told you that she's
Speaker 1: looking for someone with big dig energy and that if
Speaker 1: you don't.
Speaker 2: Leave you feel.
Speaker 1: Where how did that make you feel?
Speaker 6: Well?
Speaker 2: I just feel it didn't make me feel good. I
Speaker 2: feel like, yeah, I feel like she wants someone who
Speaker 2: has like some swag maybe and kind I'm kind of pooring,
Speaker 2: you know, like I'm kind of quiet, and I feel
Speaker 2: like and she's kind of looking for someone who can,
Speaker 2: uh kind of command a room a little bit, you know.
Speaker 2: So it didn't make me feel goo good. But hopefully
Speaker 2: since we're married, I can kind of turn that around
Speaker 2: a little bit.
Speaker 1: M What do you want from her? Do you want
Speaker 1: her to change anything about herself?
Speaker 2: That's a good question. I feel like maybe she could
Speaker 2: just have a little more patience with me. You know,
Speaker 2: I know that I suffer from some social anxiety a
Speaker 2: little bit, and I have for a while. So I
Speaker 2: feel like, yeah, it's just I want her to show
Speaker 2: me a little patience and I think we can get there.
Speaker 1: Have you told her that.
Speaker 2: I'm sorry you kind of cut out there?
Speaker 1: Have you told her that?
Speaker 7: Oh?
Speaker 2: Yeah, for sure, many times?
Speaker 1: And does she does she seem she said, does she
Speaker 1: seem like she's she's internalized and made a further effort
Speaker 1: toward being more patient with you?
Speaker 2: Yeah, because I feel like, you know, she likes to
Speaker 2: kind of be romanced a little bit, and I'm not
Speaker 2: very good at romancing.
Speaker 3: You know.
Speaker 2: She likes to kind of be just reminded that she's loved,
Speaker 2: and she likes to kind of be taken out on
Speaker 2: dates and stuff like that. So but it's hard because
Speaker 2: you know, you come home, you work all day and.
Speaker 1: Yeah, okay, here's what I do want to say to you, Simba.
Speaker 1: Here's what I want to say to you, Simba. Simba.
Speaker 1: I think I think if you're trying to build a
Speaker 1: family here, if you're trying to build a life, a
Speaker 1: long lasting relationship with kids and all that, I think
Speaker 1: you should be married to someone who loves you for
Speaker 1: who you are, who believes that you are enough, but
Speaker 1: also it's continuously encouraging you, challenging you to be better
Speaker 1: in ways in which you yourself also desire to be better.
Speaker 1: I don't like that your wife is telling you, you know,
Speaker 1: you better man up right now or else I'm out
Speaker 1: of here again. I don't want to pry too deep
Speaker 1: or make too many assumptions because I don't really feel
Speaker 1: like I can grasp the full scope of your relationship
Speaker 1: over the course of ten minutes. I'm not going to
Speaker 1: pretend like I can, but I will just say that
Speaker 1: I think you should be with someone who accepts you
Speaker 1: for who you are while still simultaneously challenging you. And
Speaker 1: I think that you should also be checking in with
Speaker 1: yourself to see if you're happy, because if you know
Speaker 1: she's not making the effort to be more patient with you,
Speaker 1: then why would you be inclined to make the effort
Speaker 1: to man up for her? You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1: I don't like that there's an ultimatum attached to it.
Speaker 1: I think it's good that you two are challenging each
Speaker 1: other to be better, but if you're going to be
Speaker 1: raising a child with this parson, if you're going to
Speaker 1: be deeply connected with this person, this person is gonna
Speaker 1: be the most important person in your life. They should
Speaker 1: feel as though you are enough. How do you feel
Speaker 1: about that?
Speaker 2: No, it's so good. I like that. I like that
Speaker 2: a lot, and I can't wait to tell her. She's
Speaker 2: going to be so excited. I got on the show.
Speaker 2: But uh, I kind of like that.
Speaker 4: I like that.
Speaker 2: There's a balance, you know, and I really agree that
Speaker 2: it takes It's a two way street and it will
Speaker 2: take effort on both our parts. So I really like that.
Speaker 1: Anything else you want to say before we go, Simba?
Speaker 2: No, thank you so much. By chat Bye bye Lyle.
Speaker 1: Goodbye, Simba.
Speaker 2: Thanks by.
Speaker 1: Simba. Simba, Simba, sim Simba. I don't know. I don't
Speaker 1: have a wife, I don't have a children. I'm not
Speaker 1: in love. I don't know if I'll ever be in love.
Speaker 1: I don't know if anything qualifies me to tell Simba anything.
Speaker 1: You know, I'm just an old chunk of coal, just
Speaker 1: an old green, crackly leaf, you know. Hello, doctor Gex, Hello,
Speaker 1: how are you?
Speaker 3: I'm good, sir, I'm go because I got this problem.
Speaker 3: I've ran off, you know, I ran off about eleven miles.
Speaker 3: I've gotta I gotta rip some the band aid up
Speaker 3: until that, I'm not coming back and I need your help.
Speaker 3: How do igue?
Speaker 1: Okay? So you said you've ran away?
Speaker 3: Yeah?
Speaker 1: Where did you run away?
Speaker 3: From the mountains of Idaho?
Speaker 1: You ran away to Idaho? Or from Idaho.
Speaker 3: From Yeah, you ran cold.
Speaker 1: The mountains of Idaho? Because it sounds very cold. Where
Speaker 1: did you run away to.
Speaker 3: San Diego? Works worn?
Speaker 1: That sounds like a a well informed decision. What what
Speaker 1: was the impetus of that decision? Why did you Why
Speaker 1: did you run away? Was it just the weather?
Speaker 3: Well, I'm allergic to the cold. Eh, I'm better gets
Speaker 3: as well, but I actually am. And it's called cold
Speaker 3: d gardia and it's just not I don't do well
Speaker 3: in cold.
Speaker 1: Mhm mhm. And so from what you've said, you you
Speaker 1: left someone there? You left uh a woman who is
Speaker 1: important to you in Idaho?
Speaker 4: Is that?
Speaker 1: Is that what I'm hearing?
Speaker 3: I freaking did that, and I'm not really duck. I'm
Speaker 3: not proud of it and I'm not happy about it,
Speaker 3: but I did it, you know.
Speaker 4: H.
Speaker 1: Yeah, did you have any conversation with her before you
Speaker 1: left her? Did you just completely leave and then not
Speaker 1: tell her?
Speaker 6: No?
Speaker 3: I I she saw me taking some bags and stuff
Speaker 3: when I said, I'm going to hire one of your
Speaker 3: friends to take me to the airport. You think that
Speaker 3: would be okay? I said that, and then I did it,
Speaker 3: and then I flew away.
Speaker 8: Hmm.
Speaker 1: And why was it so hard to leave this person behind?
Speaker 3: She's really Jesus sweet old gal. You know, I'm old
Speaker 3: some bitch, and so she and so like we've been
Speaker 3: around the block and she's pretty pretty, nice little girl
Speaker 3: and stuff. But yeah, I have the mind of a
Speaker 3: twenty year old and I need those twenty year old things.
Speaker 3: And no, the older girl, they just may not be
Speaker 3: able to satisfy a fellaw like that, you know what
Speaker 3: I mean?
Speaker 1: How long have you and uh and the girl, the
Speaker 1: girl that you left behind? How long had you and
Speaker 1: her been together?
Speaker 5: Well?
Speaker 3: I started kicking around with her and stuck for about
Speaker 3: ten years, and then then we became kind of intimate
Speaker 3: for several years, and and then I lived with her
Speaker 3: for several months last fall and winter and ran off.
Speaker 3: I don't like to.
Speaker 1: Well, well, well, so tell so okay, So then tell
Speaker 1: me this, how come she didn't come with you?
Speaker 3: You know, she she has family and friends and the stuff.
Speaker 3: You know, a lot of that kind of thing going on.
Speaker 3: I don't. Well, I have family, and but I could
Speaker 3: give a funk about it, you know, I just go
Speaker 3: where I go.
Speaker 8: M h yeah.
Speaker 1: So, in in sort of examining, like what's important to
Speaker 1: you in the context of of of this decision, would
Speaker 1: you say that? And it's okay if if, if, this
Speaker 1: is the answer, because I think it's good to know
Speaker 1: what you value is friends and family and relationships with
Speaker 1: other people. Is that important to you?
Speaker 3: You know, I'd rather just sunbathe on a rock out
Speaker 3: in the middle of the desert and hang out with
Speaker 3: any of them. I've been that way. Most of my
Speaker 3: wife has been that way, you know. I'm prospector. So
Speaker 3: I would dig holes in the ground and sometimes I
Speaker 3: would dig for hundreds of yards, and I enjoyed being
Speaker 3: way way down there, you know, and all by my fault,
Speaker 3: all you could hear was your heart beat.
Speaker 1: Do you mind if I ask you how old you are?
Speaker 3: I'm seventy fus a little more than seventy eight.
Speaker 1: And you say that you really enjoy being alone? Has
Speaker 1: it been like that for your entire life.
Speaker 3: Yeah. Yeah, I would disappear into the mountain and I
Speaker 3: wouldn't come out for a long time. Eh. What was
Speaker 3: I was married once? The time I was married, scalous,
Speaker 3: I was married to the schalty's secretary, you know, in
Speaker 3: a college, and she wanted me to become something, you know,
Speaker 3: other than a bomb, and a prospector to her was
Speaker 3: a bomb, you know. And so I went to school
Speaker 3: and I could. I quit a semester before I graduated
Speaker 3: with distinguished honors. And it's all because she goes, you
Speaker 3: know what, this summer, You're not going into the mountains
Speaker 3: ever again. You're going to stay home, nada. I was
Speaker 3: working for a law guy and I was an intern,
Speaker 3: and he come in and he told me, I'm going
Speaker 3: to bump you up fourteen to eighty five cases, and
Speaker 3: I'm not going to give you a raise. I've ran
Speaker 3: off that day to you ran off and I even
Speaker 3: come back. I never even went back home ever.
Speaker 1: What is What is home is where it's home for you?
Speaker 3: Oh man, I must have been a nomad in my
Speaker 3: past life, right, mm hmm. So I'm I'm no mad.
Speaker 3: I'm not very domesticated Yeah, that's not good, you know,
Speaker 3: and I'm not civilized either.
Speaker 1: Mostly well, hold on, stop, can't stop you for just
Speaker 1: a second. You said that, you're saying that's not that good,
Speaker 1: and that leads into what I was going to ask you,
Speaker 1: is so you're saying that you've been nomadic for most
Speaker 1: of your life. You've been very comfortable and actively pursued
Speaker 1: lots of time alone. And and I'm curious, if anything
Speaker 1: at all, have there been many cons to this lifestyle
Speaker 1: or many times in which you reconsidered your position of
Speaker 1: always desiring to be nomadic and to be alone. Have
Speaker 1: there been times where you wanted.
Speaker 3: I've lost a few friends over it. Because if if
Speaker 3: you were a friend of mine and you just came
Speaker 3: up on me all of a sudden, like you know,
Speaker 3: knocked on my door, I'll be all set. You needed
Speaker 3: to let me know you were going to come there
Speaker 3: and visit. Otherwise on my just pulled a gun off,
Speaker 3: show up and back you the hell out of the
Speaker 3: door and tell you never to come back again, you know.
Speaker 3: And that's the way I was. And I'm having a
Speaker 3: hard time with that now. I'm don diego. You people
Speaker 3: knocking on the door on the all shit. Oh my.
Speaker 1: People are people are knocking on your door all the
Speaker 1: time in San Diego? Why are they knocking on your door?
Speaker 3: Oh, there's delivery.
Speaker 6: You know.
Speaker 3: I don't go out to the store as much, so
Speaker 3: I have things delivered and they knock, knock, blah blah
Speaker 3: and they walk away.
Speaker 5: Right.
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, I never had it. I never allowed people
Speaker 3: to come knocking on my door. I had two gates
Speaker 3: and they're both locked, and there was lots of signs
Speaker 3: saying scary shit.
Speaker 5: You know.
Speaker 1: Now, I have another question for you that I I
Speaker 1: have another question for you. Do you because I feel
Speaker 1: like there's a difference between these two and I'm curious
Speaker 1: what it is for you. Do you just enjoy being
Speaker 1: alone or do you actively not like other people.
Speaker 3: Like totally be comfortable with me. I just you know,
Speaker 3: I don't totally like or dislike other people because sometimes
Speaker 3: I'm the walfar. I'm like blah blah blah blah blah,
Speaker 3: you know and stuff. However, when I'm doing blah blah, boy,
Speaker 3: I need to be by myself and you guys need
Speaker 3: to fuck out of here. Yeah. So there's some people
Speaker 3: now that are comfortable being a one and I know.
Speaker 3: I Yeah, I'm doing many a woman's life. You know,
Speaker 3: I've been married four times and and I have numerous
Speaker 3: girlfriends and stuff. That's none of it stuck, you know,
Speaker 3: because I had to go to the hills.
Speaker 1: M How long after being in a relationship will you
Speaker 1: typically start to feel like you're tired of it and
Speaker 1: you need to be alone?
Speaker 3: Well, I'm not to scale on the internet today and
Speaker 3: it lasted about three four hours and I'm started after
Speaker 3: that and lads go, you know this is not gonna
Speaker 3: work out?
Speaker 4: Okay, bye?
Speaker 1: So after four marriages and all these girlfriends, all these
Speaker 1: people meeting online, what keeps you going back? Because after
Speaker 1: because after four marriage because on the fourth marriage, right,
Speaker 1: you have to be like, all right, didn't work out
Speaker 1: the previous three times, but let's try again. What made you?
Speaker 1: What made you want to try again?
Speaker 3: Ah? Dude, it's the sense of a woman, right. How
Speaker 3: could you not? How can you not? I'm sorry? Turned
Speaker 3: me out?
Speaker 4: H H.
Speaker 1: Do you have friends? Just people like friends?
Speaker 2: You know?
Speaker 3: I have a couple, but rarely do I speak to them.
Speaker 3: M fairly a couple of times a year. Maybe because
Speaker 3: one of my good friends once a year on his birthday.
Speaker 1: Do you see one of your good friends once a
Speaker 1: year on his birthday?
Speaker 3: You know, I just talked to him on the phone.
Speaker 1: So when you're alone, what do you do to pass
Speaker 1: the time? What are what are some activities that you
Speaker 1: find yourself doing day to day.
Speaker 3: I do a lot of exercises to the old part,
Speaker 3: and I want to stay in shape and so and
Speaker 3: I read. I read like a million pages a year.
Speaker 3: You know, people that can read, they can do whatever
Speaker 3: they all they want, you know, because they got all
Speaker 3: the all the words in their heads. So a lot
Speaker 3: of reading. I'd probably read three four books a week,
Speaker 3: and they can be of anything. I'm thinking about reading
Speaker 3: books on how to be a doctor and the lawyer,
Speaker 3: and you don't even learn how to be a therapist.
Speaker 3: I don't know, it's probably not. I'll be a bad therapist.
Speaker 3: I really would.
Speaker 1: Why do you think it would be a bad therapist?
Speaker 3: Because I give them bad advice? You know, they are fight,
Speaker 3: fight or flight. I'm always on the flight end of it,
Speaker 3: and so I hit out. You know that's not good
Speaker 3: all the time. You can't just like you can't just
Speaker 3: pull up your stakes and run off the whole time.
Speaker 3: But here's that's the way I'm doing to me until
Speaker 3: the day I doe. So that's me.
Speaker 1: So is that is that the way you feel about
Speaker 1: yourself and about your life is that continually you're You're
Speaker 1: like you're running away.
Speaker 3: Or I'm just totally impulsive. Right, but give an impulse
Speaker 3: and I just take it, and I'm like, I'll go
Speaker 3: buy a ticket and fly away. Right, I've done that
Speaker 3: to I here. So yeah, and it gets expensive, you
Speaker 3: know for old people to go buy tickets and things
Speaker 3: and fly away, yeah, or fly back? Okay, I haven't. Yeah,
Speaker 3: that's that's even harder like that.
Speaker 1: So in in in seventy years, do you have anything
Speaker 1: that you regret?
Speaker 3: I not, No, no freaking way, I don't regret nothing.
Speaker 3: I've got four children, I've got eight grandchildren, and I
Speaker 3: just love everythreaking one of them. But I just want
Speaker 3: them to see how it went from me.
Speaker 1: So you have you didn't even mention that you didn't
Speaker 1: mention that you had h you had children and grandchildren.
Speaker 3: I know I can't tell you everything. It's a little
Speaker 3: short thing here, but all I mean I could do
Speaker 3: balling you. I've been a prospector. I've dug four hundred
Speaker 3: and ten yards a tonnel underground by hand with the
Speaker 3: sledge hammer, a pig bar and a wheelbarrow, you know,
Speaker 3: and a candle light. I've done a lot of the
Speaker 3: things that the old timers did. I'm old timer too.
Speaker 1: Do you ever do you ever see your children and grandchildren?
Speaker 3: I cut thousands? What's that did?
Speaker 1: Do you ever see your children and grandchildren?
Speaker 3: Mm hmmm? You know on messenger and stuff? Mm hmm.
Speaker 1: Yeah, you're pretty tech savvy, super considering. Uh, how you
Speaker 1: you're you're talking about doing all of being an old timer?
Speaker 3: Yeah, man, I went to I've been to college a
Speaker 3: couple of times, and I could have been a distinguished
Speaker 3: honor student if I just stayed there other semester. I've
Speaker 3: got this the knowledge, you know, educated gold for however,
Speaker 3: I don't know education helps you to be more social
Speaker 3: and not probably not m hm.
Speaker 4: M hm.
Speaker 3: I'm a hard case house dick.
Speaker 1: So do you have any any advice for anyone out
Speaker 1: there listening to this of anything that you have have
Speaker 1: learned in your time of solitude and introspection?
Speaker 3: My dolly ideas, Jack, I got. I've got advice for
Speaker 3: the young folks out there. Please don't don't get a
Speaker 3: job and work yourself hard to hurt yourself, you know,
Speaker 3: don't hurt your back working for somebody. Just if you
Speaker 3: have to just be a bomb, you know, because you'll
Speaker 3: be okay. You make enough word me to feed yourself,
Speaker 3: you'll be okay. You won't hurt yourself, and you'll laugh longer.
Speaker 3: And then if you gotta get married, don't have children
Speaker 3: until you're in your late forties. If you have to
Speaker 3: just adopt a seventeen year old that kids stuff, I don't.
Speaker 3: That's no way. Let me have great here. Yeah, so
Speaker 3: there you go.
Speaker 1: Did you have a hard time raising your kids? What
Speaker 1: did you have a hard time raising your kids?
Speaker 3: No? I believe with my youngest daughter. And she's an intelligent,
Speaker 3: freaking person, I know. And wow, Yeah, she's an artist
Speaker 3: and she's you know, she's on top of her you know,
Speaker 3: she's only twenty one and she makes several hundred dollars
Speaker 3: a day, way more than I ever did it. Hurry,
Speaker 3: I guess for sure. Yeah, successful young woman. She's married
Speaker 3: to a pirate. She's nice too. Yeah, he's an actual pirate.
Speaker 1: She's married to an actual Where did she where does
Speaker 1: she meet an actual pirate?
Speaker 3: You not Eyman wine right, and she told me that
Speaker 3: she would never ever get married, and by god, she's
Speaker 3: married again, you know, somewhere off over in Washington, somewhere
Speaker 3: he was he's stationed there as a pirate and until like, yeah,
Speaker 3: I don't think they get along just fine.
Speaker 1: Well, Teelor, you said your name.
Speaker 3: Was Killer, like a boat tiller or a road to Killer,
Speaker 3: something like, you know, like that, that kind of killer Tiller.
Speaker 1: Any any final thoughts, feelings, sentiments that you wish to
Speaker 1: share before we go.
Speaker 3: I think your show is really cool, doctor Gak, and
Speaker 3: I'll continue.
Speaker 1: Thank you very much to welcome in.
Speaker 3: You have good evening you as well.
Speaker 1: Shout out to Tiller. Very interesting, very interesting perspective, Uh
Speaker 1: from Tiller. There's a lot of unpack out of that.
Speaker 1: The idea of there's an idea that I think about
Speaker 1: over time, where like you know, society tells us that,
Speaker 1: I mean, what is the thesis of every Disney movie,
Speaker 1: of a lot of things, is that the most important
Speaker 1: thing in life is friends and family? But what if
Speaker 1: it's not. What about Tiller? He seems like he's having
Speaker 1: a great time. I don't know if he's having a
Speaker 1: great time, but he seemed like it. People can seem
Speaker 1: like a lot of things and not be those things.
Speaker 1: But I don't know. I'm not going to say one
Speaker 1: way or the other. But he seems like he's chilling.
Speaker 1: He seems like he loves. He seemed like he love,
Speaker 1: He had love right. He clearly loved. I don't know
Speaker 1: if it was his daughter or his granddaughter that he
Speaker 1: was talking about, but he clearly loved her, clearly loved
Speaker 1: his children, but also love nothing more than his alone time,
Speaker 1: his books. Where the hell did she meet a pirate?
Speaker 1: It was the one thing I wasn't sure about. Hello,
Speaker 1: big gek, Hello is this Daniel?
Speaker 7: Yes, this is what's up with?
Speaker 1: Do not a whole lot? Is there anything in particular
Speaker 1: that you want to talk about today?
Speaker 9: I have a couple of things, A couple of things here, Okay,
Speaker 9: tell me Number one. I just found out that we
Speaker 9: have a marijuana farmer's market where I live. Okay, that's
Speaker 9: kind of exciting. I'm new to the world of marijuana,
Speaker 9: so I'm like, I'm kind of stoked about it a
Speaker 9: little bit.
Speaker 1: Daniel, you had a particular thing that you told the
Speaker 1: call screener that you wanted to talk about and I
Speaker 1: can tell that you are sort of skirting around it.
Speaker 1: Why are you doing that?
Speaker 9: It's it's kind of the I don't know, it's it's
Speaker 9: a little a little nervous thing. It's a little it's
Speaker 9: a little bit of a anxiety to talk about it.
Speaker 9: I don't know.
Speaker 2: I don't.
Speaker 9: I don't usually open up to the random geck of
Speaker 9: the internet.
Speaker 8: Mm hm m hm hm.
Speaker 1: Well, Daniel, it says here that you have a crush
Speaker 1: on one of your co workers.
Speaker 9: That is true, This is true. She's she's very I
Speaker 9: don't know, she's she's nice, she's she lasts in my jokes,
Speaker 9: which I think is is pretty stellar. She appreciates my
Speaker 9: meat both puns after after the singer died our ip.
Speaker 8: And she's pretty cool.
Speaker 1: Mm hmm. So are you are you going to make
Speaker 1: any attempt to to get to know her about her,
Speaker 1: to talk to her about things, to go on a
Speaker 1: date with her, to somehow action upon your crush.
Speaker 9: So yes, actually, but she just broke up with her boyfriend,
Speaker 9: so I'm trying to give it a little bit of
Speaker 9: time so that she can heal. But I did invite
Speaker 9: her to go to the farmer's market with me, to
Speaker 9: check out all the weeds.
Speaker 1: Okay, all right, so this so everything does ultimately come
Speaker 1: back to each other. This there there there was in
Speaker 1: fact an element to you bringing up this farmer's market.
Speaker 1: You've invited her to the farmer's markets to to go
Speaker 1: buy weed. And how did she respond to that?
Speaker 9: She just said it was interesting. It's it's over the weekend,
Speaker 9: so she's she's given them some talking to think about it.
Speaker 9: But she has been bringing up how she wants to
Speaker 9: hang out with friends outside of works more and she
Speaker 9: wants to really she invited me to go at her
Speaker 9: New Year's party. Yeah, so I'm thinking there could be something,
Speaker 9: but I don't want to you know, push my luck
Speaker 9: and you know, review all my cards and then have
Speaker 9: it all cave in on me.
Speaker 1: You know, why are you so adverse to I mean,
Speaker 1: even in this phone call, you seem uh not, not
Speaker 1: even in this phone call, or or or in your
Speaker 1: interactions with your friends or with with people you're romantically
Speaker 1: interested in, you seem to not want to show all
Speaker 1: of your cards just in general.
Speaker 9: I guess so, I'm I'm just kind of a reserved person.
Speaker 9: I feel like if I put everything out in the open,
Speaker 9: somehow it could come back to invite me. I like
Speaker 9: to have a little bit of a mystery too that way,
Speaker 9: like I'm more intriguing.
Speaker 1: Mmmmmmm okay, And and does your does I are not
Speaker 1: to show all of your cards? Is it come from
Speaker 1: a fear of showing your cards? Or is this an
Speaker 1: intentional ploy to see in a certain way, Because to
Speaker 1: be honest, I don't like.
Speaker 3: Either of both.
Speaker 8: Yeah I.
Speaker 4: Could.
Speaker 1: I feel like, why do you desire to to appear
Speaker 1: more mysterious?
Speaker 9: I think it just adds that much more interest for others,
Speaker 9: Like like you know, people when they watch a show
Speaker 9: doing the show off on a cliffhanger for some episodes
Speaker 9: and you think, oh my god, what's going to happen next?
Speaker 9: And it leaves you like wondering it's so interested and
Speaker 9: stay invested. I feel like if I show some sort
Speaker 9: of mystery to myself, like well founded mystery. I don't
Speaker 9: make stuff up, but I kind of reserve just enough
Speaker 9: so that you know, they could she could be more
Speaker 9: interested and say, okay, so the one that like she
Speaker 9: she's asked me all questions about you know, the next
Speaker 9: car I'm gonna buy and stuff, and I just I
Speaker 9: try to try to leave some sort of reservation from that.
Speaker 9: But also, like I said, I feel like if I
Speaker 9: open up, they could be used to against me, to like,
Speaker 9: I don't know, exploit my insecurity.
Speaker 1: Totally, totally, totally, totally, I totally hear what you're saying, Daniel.
Speaker 1: You know, man, I'm gonna tell you. I know, I
Speaker 1: just went on a hold shpiel about how don't want
Speaker 1: to give advice. But that's a terrible uh. I I
Speaker 1: unfortunately host what some may consider an advice podcast, But
Speaker 1: I will tell you in my own personal life, when
Speaker 1: it comes to the realm of sort of uh, romantic
Speaker 1: hobble gobble or not not even not even romantic hobble gobble,
Speaker 1: business hobble gobble, relate, friendship hobble gobble, all types of
Speaker 1: hobble gobble, I have found that the more I can
Speaker 1: just be without trying to change my personality or strategize.
Speaker 1: Everyone's very obsessed with strategizing the various ways they can
Speaker 1: say this cool thing or act this certain way to
Speaker 1: get this person to think that of them or whatnot.
Speaker 1: And I don't know about you, but I used to
Speaker 1: do a lot, and don't get me wrong, I still
Speaker 1: do my fair share of doing that. But every time
Speaker 1: I find myself doing that, it feels just stressful. It
Speaker 1: feels just like, you know, I've been so much happy
Speaker 1: in this situation. It's a lot of work to try
Speaker 1: to seem a certain way, and I find myself happier
Speaker 1: when I can just be and people, naturally, I've noticed,
Speaker 1: will either be attracted to who I am when I
Speaker 1: am just being or they will not be right. But
Speaker 1: I don't go out of my way. I try, I try.
Speaker 1: I never want to present to any of this is
Speaker 1: if I'm the master of it, because I'm totally, totally,
Speaker 1: totally not. But this is just where I would ultimately
Speaker 1: like to be in my life. That's what I'm telling you.
Speaker 1: I try to just be exist and not try to
Speaker 1: seem a certain way to people, because it just makes
Speaker 1: me happier. It makes me feel better about myself. It
Speaker 1: makes me feel a little bit less like I'm putting
Speaker 1: on a thing of a way to try to be
Speaker 1: and it just skips so many unnecessary steps. Like, for example,
Speaker 1: something I've been trying working on lately, again not a
Speaker 1: master of it, but been working on it is if
Speaker 1: I'm ever texting with someone and I find myself rewriting
Speaker 1: and writing a text to try, like you know how,
Speaker 1: you know how it is, trying to craft the perfect
Speaker 1: text that sounds the perfect way, right. I've decided I'm
Speaker 1: not I've decided I'm not gonna do that anymore. I've decided.
Speaker 1: And I look at my text with people and I'm
Speaker 1: like and every and I want them to look all
Speaker 1: the same. I don't want to text one person one
Speaker 1: sort of cool way and one person like more like RelA.
Speaker 1: Just I just exist. I am, and people either well
Speaker 1: like me or they won't. But I'm I'm tired of
Speaker 1: trying to craft the cool text, trying to say the
Speaker 1: cool thing. It's it's exhausting. It's so much outward effort,
Speaker 1: where you could, instead, Daniel, focus on improving the aspects
Speaker 1: of your personality that you yourself are proud of, leaning
Speaker 1: more into yourself and confidently trying to express that self
Speaker 1: out into the world. Again, I'm not an expert of that,
Speaker 1: but that's the philosophy that I like to undertake when
Speaker 1: it comes to things like this. So I get why
Speaker 1: you want I get why you want to create an
Speaker 1: air of mystery. But here's the thing. This girl that
Speaker 1: you like, she's either going to like you or she's not.
Speaker 1: And in reality, the like the idea that you can
Speaker 1: say some cool thing or act some cool way that
Speaker 1: will change that is faulty, I think, and I think
Speaker 1: you would be better off focusing on just being yourself
Speaker 1: as much as you possibly can and projecting that as
Speaker 1: authentically as you possibly can, and then see who sticks around.
Speaker 1: It'll be a much it's a tougher journey, for sure,
Speaker 1: but it will be a better long term strategy for
Speaker 1: you than to try to see a mysterious what do
Speaker 1: you think about all that?
Speaker 9: I think that's a very well put and very well founded,
Speaker 9: because there are times when I'm talking with her, like
Speaker 9: I'll bring up things about myself, like you know, a
Speaker 9: playlist I made for my funeral, and like the things
Speaker 9: that just that are more about me and less like
Speaker 9: you know, act like made up or left to you know,
Speaker 9: kind of persuade her, like you said, but like when
Speaker 9: I have those types of conversations, it just feels more
Speaker 9: genuine and more authentic, and it's just a lot easier
Speaker 9: to do. But the example that you had is text
Speaker 9: is beautifully crafted. When you have to sit there and
Speaker 9: rewrite the text over and over. It just it doesn't
Speaker 9: feel natural, it doesn't feel correct. So I agree with
Speaker 9: what are you doing yourself? And that's that's something that
Speaker 9: I I kind of want to pick one up. So
Speaker 9: thanks for shouldn't like.
Speaker 1: To that for sure, Daniel. I wish you good luck.
Speaker 1: And again, as I said, I'm not an expert of
Speaker 1: these things. I'm trying to do them alongside uh you,
Speaker 1: So you know, I hope that I hope that that
Speaker 1: helped inform something.
Speaker 8: It really did.
Speaker 9: It kind of opened up my eyes a little bit.
Speaker 1: So thank you, appreciate it, Thank you for calling Daniel.
Speaker 9: Thank you enjoying it.
Speaker 1: Oh fae, I cut him off before he said to
Speaker 1: enjoy the rest of my day. Now my day is
Speaker 1: gonna suck. I seriously do that. I fucking made up.
Speaker 1: I made a promise to myself. I made a promise
Speaker 1: to myself and maybe you guys will join me. But
Speaker 1: every if I've ever if I'm crafting a text back
Speaker 1: for more than five minutes or something I've been doing,
Speaker 1: I've been doing this lately. I'll catch myself if I'm
Speaker 1: trying to craft the perfect text or email or whatever
Speaker 1: it is, and I'll go with the fuck am I
Speaker 1: just send it who gives it? Because at the I
Speaker 1: fucking genuinely believe. I fucking genuinely believe that whatever it
Speaker 1: is you want from the person, whether it's you want
Speaker 1: them to go on a date with you, you want them
Speaker 1: to be friends with you, you want them to work with
Speaker 1: you in some sort of business capacity, whatever it is,
Speaker 1: they kind of already will want to or won't want to,
Speaker 1: I think, And the amounts that you can influence whether
Speaker 1: or not they will or won't by whatever it is
Speaker 1: you say in your text, aside from the outliers, if
Speaker 1: you like, say something that's completely crazy, you know, but
Speaker 1: I believe that the amount of influence that you can
Speaker 1: have by the crafting the perfect whatever it's kind of low.
Speaker 1: Think about it like this. Think about the person you
Speaker 1: have a crush on, right if they texted you, you
Speaker 1: would respond It doesn't matter what they It doesn't really
Speaker 1: matter what they say. They could send an emoji, they
Speaker 1: could send a thing with five exclamation points, it doesn't matter.
Speaker 1: You would respond why because you want to. It doesn't
Speaker 1: matter what they say. People either will want to or
Speaker 1: won't want to. That's just what I think but I'm
Speaker 1: a crazy get go guy on the computer. Hello, Why
Speaker 1: how are you?
Speaker 3: I'm doing well?
Speaker 5: How are you?
Speaker 1: I'm doing I'm doing good. It says here that you
Speaker 1: are a therapist and you would like to talk about
Speaker 1: the difference between what I do and actual therapy, and
Speaker 1: I would love to have this conversation.
Speaker 5: Yeah, I'd love to have a conversation. I was telling
Speaker 5: the screener guy that I was super stoked to even
Speaker 5: get to that point because I tried calling many times
Speaker 5: and have never been able to get through. And then yeah,
Speaker 5: I was just I'm a big fan. I follow you
Speaker 5: on the ground, follow you on stream.
Speaker 6: It's really cool.
Speaker 1: Thank you, thank you. I'm excited to have this conversation.
Speaker 1: This is going to sound out of context when I
Speaker 1: put it into a podcast. But we did just have
Speaker 1: a caller call in saying that they were hanging on
Speaker 1: a thread, and I had to decline that call because
Speaker 1: it felt a little bit too too intense for me,
Speaker 1: and I felt as though I felt as though it's
Speaker 1: it would be responsible to take a call like that,
Speaker 1: even though you know, I do hope that person gets help.
Speaker 1: What do you think about that, Tiffany, Yeah.
Speaker 5: No, I was actually watching that, and I was like, huh,
Speaker 5: and I felt very nervous for you and that conversation.
Speaker 5: I think you handled it great.
Speaker 1: So tell me. You said the differences between what I
Speaker 1: do and actual therapy, I I I, you know, I'd
Speaker 1: love to hear your thoughts on all this.
Speaker 3: Well.
Speaker 5: I mean, I I've I view what you do as
Speaker 5: as entertainment, but with you know, very genuine flair. I
Speaker 5: you know, obviously this is unscripted. You don't know who's
Speaker 5: going to be giving you a call and uh, and
Speaker 5: so you know, I think you bring yourself and and
Speaker 5: your reactions, your genuine reactions into that dynamic, and oftentimes
Speaker 5: it's very funny, that's super hilarious, hence the entertainment value.
Speaker 5: But I really appreciate your your kind of authenticity in
Speaker 5: in these conversations. So as far as what I think
Speaker 5: is different between what you and I do, is I
Speaker 5: operate out of a therapeutic orientation. I was trained extensively
Speaker 5: in uh, mental health, you know, mental disorders. You know,
Speaker 5: I often work collaboratively with an entire treatment team, and
Speaker 5: I mean I've treated things like suicidality and self harm
Speaker 5: and things like that, and have a kind of therapeutic
Speaker 5: orientation to operate out from to treat that. So, I mean,
Speaker 5: I view what you and I do is very different.
Speaker 5: But what I really appreciate about what you do is
Speaker 5: this uh kind of genuineness that you bring into the dynamic.
Speaker 5: And that's something you know. As a therapist, I am
Speaker 5: by profession, but I always like to tell my clients
Speaker 5: like I'm a I'm a human first and therapist as well,
Speaker 5: but you know, I try to bring my genuine self
Speaker 5: in the interactions I have with my clients as well.
Speaker 5: So yeah, I mean, I think those are kind of
Speaker 5: the big differences.
Speaker 1: Does that what ever come to you and you feel
Speaker 1: as though you cannot help them?
Speaker 4: Oh?
Speaker 2: Absolutely.
Speaker 5: Anytime I get into territory where I feel like, you know,
Speaker 5: it's out of my expertise, I I really try to
Speaker 5: understand my limitations and be very transparent out them. I
Speaker 5: think that's part of my my realness and genuineness in
Speaker 5: in my treatment is you know, heye, you're telling me
Speaker 5: about these things and it is really not in my
Speaker 5: scope of expertise. So you know, I do recommend UH
Speaker 5: treatment in X Y or Z area, but that happens frequently.
Speaker 1: Mm hmm hmm, do you think do you do? You
Speaker 1: do you have a optimistic viewpoint that everyone can be
Speaker 1: helped or have you ever met someone or had a
Speaker 1: client come in and be like, there is no hope
Speaker 1: for this person.
Speaker 5: I generally have an optimistic perspective that's largely based in
Speaker 5: my therapeutic training and my involvement in research. I have
Speaker 5: a lot of hope for treatment outcomes and treatment development.
Speaker 5: And I've worked and you know, really severe populations, and
Speaker 5: I've seen progress and recovery. So I I do, you know,
Speaker 5: And if I didn't have a sense of hope, I
Speaker 5: don't think I'd be doing what I'm doing. That being said,
Speaker 5: especially in the past couple of years of the pandemic,
Speaker 5: mental health has has really declined and it's incredibly tiring,
Speaker 5: I will say, and I've felt more burnt out than
Speaker 5: I have in a long time. But I would say
Speaker 5: I do have hope, and I think it's it's not
Speaker 5: a it's not a black or white answer either. I
Speaker 5: think there's certain populations that have worse prognosis and and
Speaker 5: some that have better prognosis. But it doesn't mean that
Speaker 5: there isn't still a chance and that if you know they're.
Speaker 4: Part of who I treat that I.
Speaker 5: Have zero kind of hope in even some improvement in
Speaker 5: their conditions.
Speaker 1: Ms burnt out by m hm doing all of this work.
Speaker 1: What do you do when you get burnt out to
Speaker 1: revive yourself?
Speaker 5: Oh, I take vacations. I have a really supportive partner.
Speaker 5: I just I really try to kind of distance myself
Speaker 5: and get myself out out away from work. I like
Speaker 5: to treat myself. You know, doesn't hurt to buy a
Speaker 5: nice pair of shoes, doesn't hurt to you know, go
Speaker 5: out to a nice dinner. It doesn't mean, yeah, I'm saying,
Speaker 5: like treat yourself. I like just shopping. I like cooking.
Speaker 5: There's a lot of things I like doing, and those
Speaker 5: are all. You know, there's forms of self care that
Speaker 5: I think are a little bit more indulgent. And then
Speaker 5: there's you know, the day to day, my.
Speaker 1: Dog, What do you when? What are you doing when
Speaker 1: you find what are you doing when you find yourself indulging?
Speaker 5: Oh? Oh, like like the fancy dinners. You know, like
Speaker 5: fancy dinners or I, you know, treat myself as something
Speaker 5: extra expensive. And yet it's hard because it's a therapist.
Speaker 5: You don't make all that much money. You don't go
Speaker 5: into the profession for the big.
Speaker 3: Dollars, but.
Speaker 5: You know, I do enjoy just at least feeling like
Speaker 5: I'm treating myself. You know, I'm a.
Speaker 4: Big dirict shopper.
Speaker 5: I like feels, and so you know, if I like
Speaker 5: go to you know, TJ Max or Nordstrom rack and
Speaker 5: find something that was would otherwise be hundreds of dollars
Speaker 5: that I've scored for like twenty that's like one of
Speaker 5: the most fun things for me to do. Hm.
Speaker 1: Hmm. Okay, so you're a real therapist. You burn out sometimes,
Speaker 1: but you go to the olive garden and fun shape.
Speaker 8: Hmm.
Speaker 1: What other questions do I have for you as a
Speaker 1: as a real therapist? What I'm doing illegal?
Speaker 5: I don't think so. But also I'm not a lawyer,
Speaker 5: so you know, I couldn't give you that specific answer.
Speaker 5: I don't think. I think you're very clear about what
Speaker 5: you do.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean I'm not a real Uh couldn't imagine
Speaker 1: being a real therapist. That sounds that sounds tough. It is.
Speaker 5: It's it's not an easy job. But I think the
Speaker 5: training to go into a therapist helps me to feel
Speaker 5: well equipped to do what I do.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean I hate being a fake one sometimes, you.
Speaker 5: Know, but to be honest, things like this, watching your
Speaker 5: feed and following you is something I do.
Speaker 4: For self care.
Speaker 5: I really enjoy what you do and it brings like,
Speaker 5: you know, happiness into my day. And I've I've shared
Speaker 5: your content with my other therapist friends and we all
Speaker 5: get a you know, good laugh out of out of
Speaker 5: what you do and it's really nice.
Speaker 1: Well, damn, thank you very much, Tiffany. I appreciate all
Speaker 1: the kind words. And hmm, is there is there a
Speaker 1: before we go? I is there anything in particular else
Speaker 1: that you want to say before before we depart and
Speaker 1: never see each other again.
Speaker 5: Well, you know, something I told the screener guy was,
Speaker 5: you know, I'm calling the what I do with the therapist,
Speaker 5: and you know, what you do is not always super
Speaker 5: funny like this most recent call. It can feel kind
Speaker 5: of scary. And I can't, I mean, I can't imagine
Speaker 5: all your calls to be as like, you know, funny
Speaker 5: and joyful. So I just wanted to know how you
Speaker 5: handle things, and you know how how what some of
Speaker 5: the things you do for a self care and you know,
Speaker 5: take care of take care of your own mental health.
Speaker 1: That's a good question. I was talking about this before,
Speaker 1: but on Monday's stream I was falling apart by the
Speaker 1: end of it. Uh uh. Today's stream, though it was great.
Speaker 1: I don't know. It's hard because it really feels like
Speaker 1: I'm rolling the dice every time I get on here where.
Speaker 1: Sometimes I feel really great about things and I'm like, oh,
Speaker 1: this is a good thing to be doing. And sometimes
Speaker 1: I'm like, what the hell have I gone and got
Speaker 1: myself into by being a fake gecko guy thing on
Speaker 1: the computer? But how do I stay sane? I don't know.
Speaker 1: I wish I could give you a answer for that.
Speaker 1: I've been trying to meditate more, journaling, getting high, ohthough
Speaker 1: that's probably not a good one. I eat a lot
Speaker 1: of candy. That's also not a good one. Ah, you know,
Speaker 1: just bad stuff. But trying to take breaks. Although I'm
Speaker 1: conflicted about breaks. I'm very conflicted about the idea of breaks,
Speaker 1: because a break, okay, like if I'm being very stressed
Speaker 1: out by my job or by something that, let's say
Speaker 1: by my job, and I'm like, okay, I need a break,
Speaker 1: I almost feel like I'm escaping from the thing as
Speaker 1: opposed to facing it head on and fixing the problem
Speaker 1: where the problem is, because right like, I could take
Speaker 1: a three week vacation whatever the fuck, come back, and
Speaker 1: then if I'm not feeling good, I still haven't I
Speaker 1: even fixed the problem. I've just escaped from it momentarily,
Speaker 1: I still have to go back to it. So that's
Speaker 1: my sort of thing about about breaks. I feel like
Speaker 1: I'm pretty good at I'm pretty good at finding time
Speaker 1: to think about things outside of the stream and live
Speaker 1: a life outside of the computer. But still when I
Speaker 1: come back, I'm still it doesn't feel like I've addressed
Speaker 1: the problem. I'm like, escape, you escape from the problem,
Speaker 1: and you come back, it's still there, you know. Does
Speaker 1: that make sense?
Speaker 7: Yeah?
Speaker 5: I mean I think you have. You have a conundrum
Speaker 5: on your hands. I mean, I I was thinking you
Speaker 5: were going to go into a separate thought about about
Speaker 5: breaks and why they can be so conflicting, because I
Speaker 5: feel similarly about breaks but in a different way and so,
Speaker 5: but but that's not where I thought you were going.
Speaker 5: And uh, and and it sounds to me like maybe
Speaker 5: if the problem being work, which is what I imagine
Speaker 5: this this streaming to be feeling that degree of stressful
Speaker 5: for you. It's yeah, it's not something a vacation necessarily
Speaker 5: is going to fix. There's something about what you do
Speaker 5: that is, I think more inherently stressful, and perhaps that
Speaker 5: needs to be like explored.
Speaker 1: You know, It's true, I feel good right now. This
Speaker 1: has been a good stream. I haven't very good for
Speaker 1: that stream, so who knows? It's always like that's that.
Speaker 1: I think that's the biggest problem that I have is
Speaker 1: that what's the is like, what is the fucking I?
Speaker 1: What is the x y X plus y times z
Speaker 1: divided by Q equation? Like that I can always feel good,
Speaker 1: but it doesn't I don't feel like I can don't
Speaker 1: feel like I have a control over that. It's just
Speaker 1: gotta's gotta go in. You's got to show up.
Speaker 5: But yeah, yeah, I mean I think it's it's probably
Speaker 5: a lot of things that contribute to you know, how
Speaker 5: you enter in stream that that kind of primes you
Speaker 5: for whether it's going to be good to some degree,
Speaker 5: And then I think, whatever the dice rolls as far
Speaker 5: as who shows up in your stream, I mean, I
Speaker 5: don't know. I feel like some of that unpredictability is
Speaker 5: some some that I something I deal with too, and
Speaker 5: you know, there are aspects of my job that I
Speaker 5: wish we're more I don't know, certain or stable in
Speaker 5: some way. But it's also what makes it kind of
Speaker 5: exciting and interesting. It feels like a new new thing
Speaker 5: to figure out or kind of challenge myself with or
Speaker 5: grow in some way, shape or form.
Speaker 6: So it's a little bit of a double edged sword.
Speaker 1: I agree with that. If are you going to invoice
Speaker 1: me for this?
Speaker 5: No, because this isn't therapy. I this is me talking
Speaker 5: to you as a human. I'm enjoying this, and you know,
Speaker 5: to some degree my my therapy self is a bit
Speaker 5: inseparable from my human self. But I'm certainly not operating
Speaker 5: out of some kind of therapeutic orientation right now. I
Speaker 5: really I do appreciate what you're what you're telling me,
Speaker 5: and I am thinking about how I feel in my
Speaker 5: life to how I deal with my stressors, and you know,
Speaker 5: really digesting your question. So you know this is more
Speaker 5: open and transparent than I would, well I would. It's
Speaker 5: hard to say I'm pretty open in therapy session. Like
Speaker 5: I said, I like to be pretty real and keep it,
Speaker 5: keep it really to be really genuine in my session.
Speaker 5: So but that being said, like, no, this is I'm
Speaker 5: not not thinking in terms of therapy. I'm not like hypothesizing.
Speaker 6: Anything or anything like that.
Speaker 1: Do you have do you have like a therapy brain
Speaker 1: and a person brain where like, like if this was
Speaker 1: a therapy session and I was telling you things, would
Speaker 1: you be hypothesizing about certain things like diagnosing whatever it is?
Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah, I mean I definitely would be. I'm trained
Speaker 5: to do like clinical interviewing, so there's sets of questions
Speaker 5: that I asked for, you know, different diagnoses, and so
Speaker 5: I'm really thinking about different diagnostic pictures. There's also structure
Speaker 5: to my therapy sessions that you know, from session one
Speaker 5: through session ten, in different stages of therapy and things
Speaker 5: like that. So it really is much more structured and
Speaker 5: clinical in that way I'm thinking in it, I don't
Speaker 5: almost feels like a different part of my brain and
Speaker 5: I am thinking about hypotheses. But I'm also telling my
Speaker 5: clients too, like, hey, if if something comes to mind
Speaker 5: as far as the diagnoses, I will be the first
Speaker 5: person to talk to you about that. So I'm not
Speaker 5: here to like hide that from you or anything. I
Speaker 5: like to really be transparent about this sort of thing.
Speaker 1: So what's wrong with me, Tiffany.
Speaker 3: I don't know.
Speaker 5: I wasn't thinking about it. I just really I am
Speaker 5: like stars structs if I'm being completely honest, Like, I
Speaker 5: got through the call and I was just like I
Speaker 5: almost lost words what to say, you know, talking to
Speaker 5: the streamer, and then at the end he's like, Okay,
Speaker 5: I'm gonna put you in the cue, but just so
Speaker 5: you know, you might not get picked.
Speaker 6: And then my heart dropped.
Speaker 5: I made it this far and it might not get
Speaker 5: through again. And I've tried calling many times, so it
Speaker 5: was just like fingers crossed, hope I get through. And
Speaker 5: so yeah, I'm really just kind of stoked.
Speaker 1: Well, Tiffany, I'm so glad that you called. It's nice
Speaker 1: to hear a real therapist's perspective on this.
Speaker 4: Uh.
Speaker 1: I don't even know if I'm a fake therapist. I
Speaker 1: think I'm just a gecko guy. I think I say this.
Speaker 1: I don't like the name therapy gecko. We're kind of
Speaker 1: just here chat and you know, exist and breathe on
Speaker 1: each other and whatnot. But thank you for sharing your perspective, Tiffany,
Speaker 1: and for having this lovely com assation with me. Is
Speaker 1: is there anything else you want to say before we
Speaker 1: go to the people to the world.
Speaker 5: No, thank you, thanks for having me on. I'm super
Speaker 5: grateful and really happy and yeah, this just sort of
Speaker 5: made my night. So thank you.
Speaker 6: I hope you have a really awesome evening.
Speaker 5: And yeah, thank you for all you do.
Speaker 1: Thank you, Tiffany. I will try have a good rest
Speaker 1: of the night.
Speaker 9: Thank you too.
Speaker 1: We did it. We talked to Tiffany. Hello, is this Gregory?
Speaker 3: That means are you Gregory.
Speaker 4: Doing good?
Speaker 5: Good?
Speaker 3: How about you?
Speaker 1: I'm doing doing okay.
Speaker 8: You know you've come so different. I was just saying
Speaker 8: you sound so different maker and my phone verses on
Speaker 8: Twitch it's actually wild.
Speaker 1: What is your name?
Speaker 8: My name is greg What is your question about?
Speaker 2: My question?
Speaker 8: Well, I do have I I have one question and
Speaker 8: the story for you. I'm also I know you were
Speaker 8: talking a lot about you're a filmmaker and you started
Speaker 8: film school and stuff, and a question I have for
Speaker 8: you after just watching your chance for quite some time,
Speaker 8: what kind of film do you see yourself making? When
Speaker 8: I was do you want to get into directed?
Speaker 1: When I was thirteen years old, I decided I wanted
Speaker 1: to become a filmmaker. I made films with my friends
Speaker 1: throw all of high school, from when I was thirteen
Speaker 1: years old to like eighteen years old, all of Highchoo School,
Speaker 1: we made a bunch of films. And to this day,
Speaker 1: the process of making those movies is probably the hardest
Speaker 1: thing I've ever done in my entire life. I don't
Speaker 1: genuinely making trying because here's the thing. It's so hard
Speaker 1: to make a movie. There's so many things you have
Speaker 1: to do to like to do it, and when your
Speaker 1: crew is a bunch of fifteen year olds, it just
Speaker 1: it makes it harder. It's the hardest thing I've ever
Speaker 1: to do. And and then I went to film school
Speaker 1: and I made some films in college, and now I'm
Speaker 1: a podcast guy thing, and I don't, I don't, I
Speaker 1: don't know. I'm not gonna say I would never make
Speaker 1: another film again in my entire life. But I haven't
Speaker 1: thought about a kind of film I would I would
Speaker 1: make moving forward. You know, I'm not against it, but
Speaker 1: it's one of those things. It's one of those things
Speaker 1: where I every like when I was I'm sure when
Speaker 1: I was twenty I was like, when I'm twenty four,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna make a movie. And now I'm twenty four
Speaker 1: and I haven't made a movie. And now I'm like,
Speaker 1: when I'm in my late thirties, I'm gonna make a movie.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna get there. I'm not gonna make a movie,
Speaker 1: So it's never gonna happen.
Speaker 8: I thought you could take a happy you really wanted to,
Speaker 8: some kind of like comedy short film. Even I get
Speaker 8: see you making that happen.
Speaker 4: For sure, I'd like to.
Speaker 1: I'd like to make a movie at some point. I
Speaker 1: don't know if it would be a Gecko thing, but
Speaker 1: I like doing this. This is I will you know
Speaker 1: what I will say about this. It's a lot easier.
Speaker 1: And when I look for things to do in my life,
Speaker 1: I just look for whatever is the least challenging. But Gregory,
Speaker 1: you said your name was yes, sir, Oh holy shit,
Speaker 1: I totally thought your name it was not Gregor. I
Speaker 1: made a wild guess. How can I get you this evening?
Speaker 8: Yeah, So the main thing I wanted to throw at
Speaker 8: you is so I had my first official, official, like
Speaker 8: full ass adult relationship. It was like, I'm so yeah,
Speaker 8: I'm twenty three, and I never really like committed hardcore,
Speaker 8: had something very serious before. And I've learned so much
Speaker 8: about like my boundaries and like, yeah, just like who
Speaker 8: I am and also the things that truly matter the
Speaker 8: most to me and also kind of made me truly
Speaker 8: think about what my Yeah, well my real purpose is too,
Speaker 8: and what drives me is a human being. That's just
Speaker 8: been pretty incredible. But I you know, I recently broke
Speaker 8: up with my girlfriend about well, I guess she's my acidalit. Yeah,
Speaker 8: it's been a month's actually, And what I wanted to
Speaker 8: run past you is I created such a healthy dynamics
Speaker 8: through the way I kind of have an outlook on
Speaker 8: life and how I just how my values are as
Speaker 8: a human being, where I always am about I'm about
Speaker 8: just being as considered as possible, communicating as much as
Speaker 8: possible and not letting emotions get to me, trying to always, yeah,
Speaker 8: to be communicative, considerate and constructive always and for me
Speaker 8: kind of enforcing that mindset with also just within the
Speaker 8: relationship with her, we kind of created this somewhat strange
Speaker 8: dynamic even after the breakup where we have yeah, well
Speaker 8: we are, chemistry is there. We still very deeply love
Speaker 8: each other, but like those red flags that would come
Speaker 8: across within that relationship are still there, and I'm trying
Speaker 8: my best to maintain cranny creating some kind of friendship
Speaker 8: with the amount of like emotional investment is so deep
Speaker 8: where it just like it kills me just that you
Speaker 8: think about her eventually being with another person as well
Speaker 8: as she that has the same feelings towards me and
Speaker 8: with being another person. But we're both like honored ship
Speaker 8: trying to do our thing.
Speaker 4: We both are.
Speaker 8: Yeah, so this is interesting. But I was thinking through yeah,
Speaker 8: through hearing all of that, do you think cre even
Speaker 8: creating that kind of dynamic in relationship with making that
Speaker 8: super healthy?
Speaker 5: It is?
Speaker 8: What is the possibility I know that possibility is probably
Speaker 8: not so high of continuing some kind of friendship, but
Speaker 8: what's uh, yeah, what's your read on on creating that
Speaker 8: kind of safe space and that in that kind of
Speaker 8: intimacy and healthiness yet? Is it even possible?
Speaker 1: My initial thoughts is, I think it's very cool that
Speaker 1: you've you've like gayined something from this relationship that you
Speaker 1: are taking with you.
Speaker 3: Uh.
Speaker 1: I don't feel like a relationship has to end good bad.
Speaker 1: I don't think that the way in which relationship ended,
Speaker 1: whether it was good or is bad or it was neutral,
Speaker 1: can have any effect on whether or not you choose
Speaker 1: to take something from it to benefit you as you
Speaker 1: forward in your life. And it sounds like you did
Speaker 1: that because you're saying to me, now that you've learned
Speaker 1: how to communicate better, your boundaries have gotten better, which
Speaker 1: is great. That's cool to hear because you can you
Speaker 1: can gain that, whether the relationship and the good or bad.
Speaker 1: So that's great, right, because if you're doing things in life,
Speaker 1: you might as well get something out of them, whether.
Speaker 3: Or bad.
Speaker 1: So I'm glad to hear that you got something out
Speaker 1: of it. That's the most important thing. I don't know
Speaker 1: if it's the most important thing. I don't know what
Speaker 1: the most important thing is. I'm go on the computer,
Speaker 1: but that is an important thing, all right. So you're
Speaker 1: so now you're in a point where you're like, should
Speaker 1: I continue to have a relationship of any kind with
Speaker 1: this person? Because you still okay? So let me ask you,
Speaker 1: let me ask you something, or rather, my understanding is
Speaker 1: that you love her, she loves you, blah blah blah.
Speaker 1: You can't stand seeing each other as at and blah
Speaker 1: blah blah. But you made the decision that now is
Speaker 1: not the right time that you have other things in
Speaker 1: your life to pursue, so you amicably broke up. Is
Speaker 1: that an accurate ish a description of what's going on?
Speaker 8: I'll give you the rundown, the upgrade version, for sure.
Speaker 8: What ended up happening was, of course, you know, constructive
Speaker 8: consider it right, you know. So what ended up happening
Speaker 8: was I literally ripped my health, my finances, my identity
Speaker 8: to make this person happy. Who and this person had
Speaker 8: a very heavy indexpectation and I was so well still
Speaker 8: I am still so in love and also had that
Speaker 8: those love goggles. I guess you can call it the
Speaker 8: facade of you know, like not seeing or well knowing
Speaker 8: the red flags and being aware of them but just
Speaker 8: diluting them, you know. And I know that's a pretty
Speaker 8: typical thing that we go through. But it got to
Speaker 8: such a level where, yeah, like I so I graduated
Speaker 8: film school, right, and I made my big Decis film.
Speaker 8: I was getting some traction, and I was going through
Speaker 8: doing editing gigs as well. So I'm sure you've also
Speaker 8: experienced you know, Tom sud film stuff in general, and
Speaker 8: just tind of trying to find that balance, right, and yeah, no,
Speaker 8: I noticed that. Yeah, it was just yeah, my life
Speaker 8: became trying to make her happy NonStop, and then I
Speaker 8: was depending on on yeah, depending on her, which is
Speaker 8: the first time ever I felt bad noticed as like
Speaker 8: I'd always yeah, I've always been so independent, and then
Speaker 8: I became dependent where it's like if she's happy, I'm happy,
Speaker 8: and it got really bad because I was just like
Speaker 8: selling merk me still time to loving. So one of
Speaker 8: that I'm happening is she she is she has some
Speaker 8: narcissistic tendencies, so she and some power kind of things.
Speaker 8: So she kind of like definitely took advantage of my
Speaker 8: my kind heart and my nice you know, mentality, and
Speaker 8: that's just how this kind of like totally went backwards.
Speaker 8: And what ended up happening is I took it to
Speaker 8: a whole other level where I love this person so
Speaker 8: much that I legit like wrote down journals all my
Speaker 8: thoughts trying to be as constructive as possible and helpful,
Speaker 8: and I literally like de coded why she says the
Speaker 8: certain things she does and why she's mean about certain things,
Speaker 8: and why like just like yeah, like I even provided
Speaker 8: all this.
Speaker 1: And all this stuff. Was that was that stressful for you?
Speaker 7: Oh?
Speaker 8: Yeah, of course, I'm balancing a few editing jobs, trying
Speaker 8: to get a more stable job. And then I got yeah,
Speaker 8: I want to go back.
Speaker 1: I want to go back to the I feel like
Speaker 1: I I feel like I kind of get what's going
Speaker 1: I want to let's go to the present here. We're
Speaker 1: in the present now. Okay, you're deciding whether or not
Speaker 1: you want to remain friends with this person.
Speaker 8: And I know that there's just heavy investment, heavy love,
Speaker 8: and there's like you said too, there's that there's still
Speaker 8: that love. But I'm fearful that I'm going to get
Speaker 8: just hurt more and more because this person seems like
Speaker 8: they're slowly catching.
Speaker 1: One know the full scope of the relationship. And again
Speaker 1: I'm only a get go on the computer. But here's
Speaker 1: my thoughts. You have a level of a level of
Speaker 1: self awareness, a level of I don't know what you
Speaker 1: would call it, but maybe maybe you would call it
Speaker 1: a desire for betterment, a lust for life, a lust
Speaker 1: for the future. I can see that within you because
Speaker 1: I can because you started this off by you started
Speaker 1: this off on a pretty positive note by saying that
Speaker 1: you found something of value from this relationship, that you've learned,
Speaker 1: something you've learned. How to communicate better, how to set
Speaker 1: better boundaries. That's what you said. You've added to your
Speaker 1: emotional skill set. You, I can tell, are invested in
Speaker 1: making yourself a better person and growing and in looking
Speaker 1: to the future. I can see that in you, and
Speaker 1: so I would say that if if you wish to
Speaker 1: continue investing in yourself moving forward, especially at the at
Speaker 1: this this beautiful age that you're at, that we're at. Essentially,
Speaker 1: I don't see any reason to continue having this person
Speaker 1: in your life if much of what you can remember
Speaker 1: from their time in your life is just stressful and
Speaker 1: is a heavy level of investment and codependency and all
Speaker 1: the things that you have just now run down to us, right,
Speaker 1: So yeah, I would, And it's not it's of course,
Speaker 1: of course, easier said than done. But I think you
Speaker 1: can do it because you've shown us that you're a
Speaker 1: guy who cares about his own self development. I would
Speaker 1: move and look past beyond this person into the great
Speaker 1: wide see of other people and experiences and opportunities that
Speaker 1: there are in life, as opposed to continuing to invest
Speaker 1: and be further dependent upon this person.
Speaker 8: Understood, I appreciate that, and I feel that I am
Speaker 8: slowly going through that process, like I've gotten things back.
Speaker 5: I like that.
Speaker 8: I was fearful that I was going to get back,
Speaker 8: Like I finally took action to commit to one of
Speaker 8: my next film projects, and I'm gonna start trying to
Speaker 8: get it producers, investors going for that, and that's what's
Speaker 8: kind of like, that's my purpose, that's who I am.
Speaker 8: So I'm like so excited for that, and that's kind
Speaker 8: of what's really keeping me going while balancing everything else.
Speaker 8: But yeah, it's just it's hard because there's just so
Speaker 8: much chemistry and love there and also she's not the
Speaker 8: most she could be. She had some impulsive tendencies as
Speaker 8: will also shoot ends up like being mad at me.
Speaker 1: Sorry, I'm sorry to cut you off, but there we go.
Speaker 1: I mean, you've got, like you know, you've got your
Speaker 1: film projects. You've got I mean, you've got like you
Speaker 1: you have a you you are building what I like
Speaker 1: to call it diversified life portfolio, which is helpful because
Speaker 1: you said that you had dependency problems and I can
Speaker 1: hear in your voice.
Speaker 7: I learned that.
Speaker 1: I can hear. I can hear, you can hear from
Speaker 1: all the things you're saying you care about developing yourself.
Speaker 1: You care about building a diverse life portfolio, and I
Speaker 1: encourage you to continue caring about those things and taking
Speaker 1: actions down that path. What do you say anamas again?
Speaker 7: Greg?
Speaker 8: Greg Or Gregory either or Greg?
Speaker 1: Good luck to you. And last thing I'm gonna tell
Speaker 1: you before we go, uh, don't wait for people to
Speaker 1: give you as a film guy whatever. Don't wait for
Speaker 1: people to give you permission to make things. Just make
Speaker 1: them and put them on the internet. Okay, Gregor, I
Speaker 1: hear you. Thank you for call. I'll talk to you soon.
Speaker 6: Hello.
Speaker 1: Huh Hi, this is Courtney.
Speaker 6: What's up?
Speaker 5: Uh?
Speaker 1: Courtney? How can I get you this evening?
Speaker 6: I don't know how to answer that question. I've heard
Speaker 6: you ask it a few times that I just didn't
Speaker 6: think it would ever happened to me.
Speaker 1: I you know, can I actually can I event to
Speaker 1: you a little bit here?
Speaker 5: Ye see?
Speaker 1: On one this is the real problem is the problem
Speaker 1: is that on one hand, this is this is this
Speaker 1: is ultimately the problem of like I don't really know
Speaker 1: what this stream is or what the goal of it
Speaker 1: is because on one hand, it's like it's free form
Speaker 1: conversations with people that don't have any sort that are
Speaker 1: sort of boundaryless, right. But then on the other hand,
Speaker 1: I'm kind of like, look, if you're gonna call in,
Speaker 1: you know I have something, you know, some something at
Speaker 1: least a little it's just easier if you have a
Speaker 1: little bit of something you know. And also you did
Speaker 1: Here's another thing is you did tell you talk to
Speaker 1: a call screener who I asked you what it is
Speaker 1: you wanted to talk about? And you did tell them
Speaker 1: something and it happened. And I don't I want to
Speaker 1: know this from your perspective because I get callers all
Speaker 1: the time time who are like who, I say, how
Speaker 1: could what do you want to talk about? And they go,
Speaker 1: I don't know? And I'm like, you just told you
Speaker 1: told the person what you want. Why are you telling
Speaker 1: me that you don't know if you told the call
Speaker 1: scare what it is you want to talk about. I'm
Speaker 1: not upset. I'm just I'm a little bit just baffled.
Speaker 1: And I'm also on my end figuring out because all
Speaker 1: at the end of the day at all, it's my
Speaker 1: responsibility all this stuff. So on my end, I'm like,
Speaker 1: how do I what's the stand? What's the bar here?
Speaker 4: This?
Speaker 1: This makes sense?
Speaker 8: Right?
Speaker 1: I'm not talking in loops. Right, this all makes sense?
Speaker 6: Oh yeah, I was just wasn't sure if I wasn't
Speaker 6: supposed to just like jump into it, you know, like
Speaker 6: I wasn't sure.
Speaker 1: There's no there's no supposed to. There's no supposed to,
Speaker 1: there's no rules. Maybe maybe I don't know, maybe I
Speaker 1: should set rules. There could be there could be a
Speaker 1: supposed to do. I could set rules. I could be
Speaker 1: like I could. I was watching I was watching a
Speaker 1: little bit of doctor Drew's stuff because we're gonna have
Speaker 1: him on soon, and he's very much like caller, what's
Speaker 1: your question? Okay, thank you, all right, And then I
Speaker 1: know it's a different style, but I'm like, well, I
Speaker 1: don't know. I don't know what my style should be,
Speaker 1: but I do. I always go back and forth on it.
Speaker 1: But you did you did? You did tell the call
Speaker 1: screen or something you want to talk about?
Speaker 6: I do, Yeah, I do. I wanted to tell you.
Speaker 6: I think it was when you had attorney Tom on.
Speaker 6: You had a caller call in and they told you
Speaker 6: about the dude got pulled over and they found some
Speaker 6: like weed in his car and dude ended up and
Speaker 6: he got a DUI for it. He told him that
Speaker 6: he told the cops that he hadn't smoked in like
Speaker 6: like two or three days or whatever, and they're like, oh, well,
Speaker 6: that's it, Like you still get a dui. And then
Speaker 6: recently I was running around door dashing and I had
Speaker 6: a roadblock on a Thursday night, which was super cool.
Speaker 6: And anyways, I had weed in my car and they
Speaker 6: were like, oh cool, Well you have weed in your car.
Speaker 6: Are you high right now?
Speaker 5: And I was like no.
Speaker 6: They're like, well, when's the last time you smoked? And
Speaker 6: I was like, well, it's been like like a couple
Speaker 6: of weeks. And they're like, well, you have weed in
Speaker 6: your car and like a bowl in your car and
Speaker 6: you just say you haven't smoked, and I was like no,
Speaker 6: and just because I remembered the episode to make sure
Speaker 6: to say that it had been a long time since
Speaker 6: I had smoked. And they gave me like a field
Speaker 6: sobriety test anyways, but they're like they go and I
Speaker 6: didn't get it to UA. Oh yeah, yeah, they let
Speaker 6: me go. She said that she thought I was high,
Speaker 6: but she thought I was good to drive anyways, But
Speaker 6: I don't know.
Speaker 2: How you.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, yeah, you know, I despite I might get
Speaker 1: some flag for this. But did you ever just forget
Speaker 1: the driving high is super illegal?
Speaker 3: Yeah?
Speaker 8: It doesn't.
Speaker 1: I mean it's easy to everyone knows that. Everyone knows that, like, okay,
Speaker 1: everyone knows that driving drunk is super illegal. It's one
Speaker 1: of those I was talking about this. I think I
Speaker 1: was talking about this on stream the other day. It's
Speaker 1: a very similar thing with texting and driving, like like
Speaker 1: like texting and driving is like you ever on it, okay,
Speaker 1: because the whole the whole thing is like you shouldn't
Speaker 1: text and drive. So when you're like going through Spotify
Speaker 1: trying to change the song and you're on your phone,
Speaker 1: it's like you somehow differentiate that from texting, even though
Speaker 1: it's the same fucking thing, just because of the messaging.
Speaker 1: Driving high it's like it's dui. It's super legal, totally
Speaker 1: as illegal as driving drunk, but you just forget because
Speaker 1: no one ever Yeah.
Speaker 6: Yeah, I mean, like I hear you, I absolutely hear you,
Speaker 6: and I totally agree. But also I got it right
Speaker 6: for the most part until I don't, but I had it.
Speaker 1: I'm even looking at the chat people. Driving high is
Speaker 1: definitely not good, but driving drunk is way worse.
Speaker 4: It.
Speaker 6: Yeah, yeah, I totally agree.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean I just forget all the time that
Speaker 1: it's uh illegal.
Speaker 6: Yeah, I mean, like I'm not it's not defense.
Speaker 1: I know people try to defend it, and it's like
Speaker 1: I get it because it's like it's at the end
Speaker 1: of the day, it's not defensible. It's not defensible at all.
Speaker 1: But I do forget this.
Speaker 6: Right, right, Like I'm not like, you can't you can't defend.
Speaker 1: Say, you can't be like, Okay, driving high is not
Speaker 1: as bad as driving drunk, it's not, but you can't
Speaker 1: defend it. There's no without that, without being a crazy person.
Speaker 6: Yeah yeah, I mean like you kind of feel like
Speaker 6: an honest band like.
Speaker 1: Trying to I've I yeah, yeah, you can't, and I
Speaker 1: shouldn't ever do that.
Speaker 6: You shouldn't know.
Speaker 8: It's round.
Speaker 6: It's totally frowned upon. But it's likely to die and
Speaker 6: kill other people.
Speaker 1: Oh, do you less likely to die and kill other people?
Speaker 1: I mean, when you're driving sober, you're pretty likely to
Speaker 1: die and kill other people.
Speaker 6: But yeah, like ninety seven percent more likely than you
Speaker 6: are to die in your room. We were talking about
Speaker 6: this the other day.
Speaker 8: Yeah, yeah, yeah, so.
Speaker 1: You know I would not I would not endorse it,
Speaker 1: but I it's one of those things. It's one of
Speaker 1: those things. Someone said riding a motorcycle of mushrooms is
Speaker 1: super fun. That sounds horrible.
Speaker 4: Man.
Speaker 1: This is why I want to place I can use
Speaker 1: the subway, man, because the subway you can get. You
Speaker 1: can you can you can be, you can be up on,
Speaker 1: you get as fucked up as you want. On this
Speaker 1: you can get no way, dude, that's believe on the
Speaker 1: subway and no one cares.
Speaker 6: The first time my best friend ever did acid, we
Speaker 6: were she drove like we thought it was going to
Speaker 6: take like an hour to kick in, because that's what
Speaker 6: dude said. And then we had like a forty five
Speaker 6: minute drive home, so we were like, sweet, we'll take
Speaker 6: it now and then like fifteen minutes after we get home,
Speaker 6: we'll start tripping. And it kicked in in like fifteen
Speaker 6: twenty minutes. Oh yeah, oh yeah. She like threw up
Speaker 6: like a whole shit time. As soon as we got
Speaker 6: like where we were going.
Speaker 2: It was terrible.
Speaker 6: I was freaking out. The passenger seat had a great time.
Speaker 1: Well, Courtney, what what do we think? I know I
Speaker 1: sort of talked a little bit over you in this
Speaker 1: What do you. What do you think Do you think
Speaker 1: we are coming away? Do you think we're coming out
Speaker 1: of this? But you and me not? Just don't just
Speaker 1: think about it. If you learned anything, think about if
Speaker 1: I learned anything. Do you think either of us learned
Speaker 1: anything from this conversation?
Speaker 4: H mm hmmm.
Speaker 6: No, I have learned nothing. Yeah, no, I've learned nothing.
Speaker 6: But maybe you've learned something. Yeah, yeah, But that's all right.
Speaker 8: We were I don't know.
Speaker 1: That was like a bull that you had that I
Speaker 1: established it at the beginning. There's no supposed to is
Speaker 1: in this?
Speaker 5: Yeah?
Speaker 1: No, I supposed to beautiful? Have a good according.
Speaker 8: Yeah you too?
Speaker 6: Get bye?
Speaker 2: Hello, listen, Hello, Hi, what's up?
Speaker 4: Can you hear me?
Speaker 1: Tyler?
Speaker 7: Yeah?
Speaker 1: How's it going?
Speaker 7: How's it going?
Speaker 1: It's going good, It's going good.
Speaker 7: You look a bit stressed?
Speaker 1: Do I really?
Speaker 4: You do?
Speaker 7: Like you're annoyed with some callers today?
Speaker 1: I don't do. What about can you like sort of
Speaker 1: cut to the bone about what about that is?
Speaker 2: Like? Like?
Speaker 1: Is it is it my body language? Is it my
Speaker 1: tone of voice?
Speaker 4: Like?
Speaker 1: What what is it that's that's signaling that too?
Speaker 7: Maybe your body language?
Speaker 1: I feel like my body language is pretty like stagnant,
Speaker 1: like I don't pretty calm. Yeah, I feel like it's
Speaker 1: pretty calm. I mean it's is it my It's got
Speaker 1: to be a tone of voice thing, because I actually
Speaker 1: I kind of see it to myself a little bit.
Speaker 7: No, I think you're good, but seeing a little stressed,
Speaker 7: like maybe you don't want to do phone calls for
Speaker 7: a while and do cooking.
Speaker 1: I'm trying to think. I don't really know if I
Speaker 1: can cook anything.
Speaker 7: It's pretty good.
Speaker 1: I have to pee, maybe that.
Speaker 2: Could be it.
Speaker 7: Gotta have confidence in your cooking. Yeah, no, don't drink
Speaker 7: your pea.
Speaker 1: Jackson Jackson.
Speaker 8: Jackson, Oh, Tyler.
Speaker 7: Yes, sir?
Speaker 1: What's up?
Speaker 7: What do you think about the trucking industry?
Speaker 1: What do I think about the trucking industry?
Speaker 7: Like?
Speaker 1: What are my opinions?
Speaker 4: Like in what?
Speaker 1: In what sense? The odd? Actually, you don't even that whatever,
Speaker 1: whatever sense, whatever sense you would be referring to. I
Speaker 1: have no opinion on it. I've never driven a truck myself.
Speaker 1: I haven't interacted with many trucks, and I I don't
Speaker 1: I don't have that much of a depinion on it,
Speaker 1: to be honest.
Speaker 7: Well, I am a truck driver. I was wondering what's
Speaker 7: your thoughts on road rage?
Speaker 1: M Hm, Tyler, is this are you asking me your thoughts?
Speaker 5: Are you?
Speaker 1: Are you asking me my thoughts? And I'm this is
Speaker 1: not a hostile response. I'm genuinely genuine curious. Are you
Speaker 1: asking me these questions to set up your thoughts on
Speaker 1: the trucking industry and road rage? Because you don't have
Speaker 1: to do that. You can just tell me your thoughts industry.
Speaker 1: You can just you can just tell you can just
Speaker 1: tell me. We don't have to you don't have to
Speaker 1: set it up, like what do you think? Here's what
Speaker 1: I think.
Speaker 7: You can just tell it wasn't necessarily set up to that.
Speaker 1: I didn't say that to be a dif just why
Speaker 1: to let you know, no, no.
Speaker 5: You're good.
Speaker 7: I didn't catch that at all. Anyways, Alma, truck driver
Speaker 7: deal with a love distracted drivers out there, which is
Speaker 7: kind of unfortunate. See a lot of people texting and driving.
Speaker 1: About one hundred.
Speaker 7: Driving.
Speaker 1: You know what is a horrible thing that I do
Speaker 1: that I think a lot of people do is I
Speaker 1: think the whole, the whole, it's the dumbest thing of
Speaker 1: all time, the whole texting, the sentiment as like we
Speaker 1: should not text and drive, right, that's been like it's
Speaker 1: on the billboards, is what the PSAs are. No texting
Speaker 1: and driving. So people now have it in their head subconsciously.
Speaker 1: If you're using your phone but you're not texting, it's fine.
Speaker 1: Like you can like in the Instagram. If you're on
Speaker 1: Instagram and you're like talking to someone of her d
Speaker 1: MS while you're in the car, it's fine. You're not
Speaker 1: texting your Instagram direct messaging and driving. There's no billboard that.
Speaker 1: If you're changing the song on your on your iPod,
Speaker 1: there's no billboard against that. You know, if you're watching
Speaker 1: TikTok while driving, no billboard. So as long as you're
Speaker 1: not like literally texting, even if you're if you're messaging
Speaker 1: someone with another iPhone, that's not texting and driving. That's
Speaker 1: eye message. That's fine. There's no law.
Speaker 7: Against that, no billboard up on it. But I do
Speaker 7: call those people in.
Speaker 1: You call them in. Oh yeah, you seem to have.
Speaker 7: Some pretty almost pretty damn close.
Speaker 1: Accidents, really, but on account of people texting.
Speaker 7: And driving, oh yeah, swervings almost sides swapping each other
Speaker 7: changing lanes at the same time, but they're both texting
Speaker 7: and drive not paying attention. It's ridiculous. It's stressful out there.
Speaker 1: To be honest, it says here that sometimes it says
Speaker 1: here sometimes that you will see people jerking off in traffic.
Speaker 7: Oh yeah, I've seen it like twice.
Speaker 8: Now, Oh my.
Speaker 1: God, I feel there. Hold on, I could have sworn
Speaker 1: there was a caller in the queue who wanted to
Speaker 1: talk about how he jerked off in traffic.
Speaker 7: Fuck that guy.
Speaker 1: Hold on, it's wait when you say when you say jerking,
Speaker 1: I don't mean the person tim Was there a caller
Speaker 1: who wanted to jerk off in traffic? I swore I
Speaker 1: could have sworn I saw it a call with that.
Speaker 7: It's so, I guess more power to him, but pay attention.
Speaker 1: Well, okay, when you say jerking off trafficks, do you
Speaker 1: mean jerking off like in when we say traffic, like
Speaker 1: how is the cars moving?
Speaker 4: Or are we like in traffic traffic in cities?
Speaker 1: Oh okay, So we're not talking like you know, moving
Speaker 1: very slowly traffic. We're talking like you know, at a
Speaker 1: red light.
Speaker 7: It's not faster.
Speaker 1: Okay, So jerking off while your car is going seventy
Speaker 1: miles an.
Speaker 7: Hour, damn right?
Speaker 1: Better than texting because you don't have to look because
Speaker 1: you don't have I disagree, because you can just you
Speaker 1: can because you can look forward and masturbate while driving,
Speaker 1: but you can if you're on texting.
Speaker 4: You have to.
Speaker 1: You have to, you know, you have to look at
Speaker 1: your phone.
Speaker 7: Well, what's jerking off them? There was one guy that
Speaker 7: was watching porn while jerking while driving down the road.
Speaker 7: This was at night, so I could see clearly into
Speaker 7: his car.
Speaker 1: Mmm, and no. Part of it was like it's kind
Speaker 1: of efficient.
Speaker 7: Part of me was like it was kind of efficient.
Speaker 7: But at the same time I was like, come on, man,
Speaker 7: so you maintaining his lane all too well?
Speaker 1: And so you said you you typically report people like that.
Speaker 7: I did not report those two.
Speaker 1: Who was the who was the last person that you reported?
Speaker 7: Another trucker actually littering?
Speaker 1: You're reporting them for littering. And when you when you
Speaker 1: make these reports, what typically follows? Are these reports actioned
Speaker 1: upon or are they forgotten?
Speaker 7: I think the littering one was forgotten about. But one
Speaker 7: I was a reckless drunk driver. I'm pretty sure he
Speaker 7: was swerving hard through traffic. People were having a hard
Speaker 7: time passing him. I called his ass in up in
Speaker 7: Missouri and they ended up catching him.
Speaker 4: M hmm.
Speaker 1: Okay, so one of our reports was actioned upon and
Speaker 1: they were he was successfully caught.
Speaker 7: Yeah, but with tex texting drivers because I've never seen
Speaker 7: him actually pulled over because usually most of time they're
Speaker 7: going the same way I am, I figured because they
Speaker 7: get off at an exit before an officer could get him.
Speaker 1: Well, well, okay, wait, hold on, hold.
Speaker 7: On, even if I call people in so you're.
Speaker 1: Wait a minute, So you're driving in your truck, right
Speaker 1: and you look to your left and you see somebody
Speaker 1: texting and driving, and you go, I'm going to report
Speaker 1: this person. It's like, but how do you report them?
Speaker 7: I have a headset that I use booth connected to
Speaker 7: my phone.
Speaker 1: Okay, I was gonna say, this feels like because it's
Speaker 1: sort of a situation where like a cop, if they
Speaker 1: want to pull over somebody who's speeding, what do they do?
Speaker 1: They got a speed speed to catch up with them
Speaker 1: to pull them over.
Speaker 7: Yep.
Speaker 1: I hate driving. I I I if I could never
Speaker 1: if I could never get into a car ever again
Speaker 1: but still be able to live a full life, I
Speaker 1: would love that. But I I I truly hate cars
Speaker 1: because you're You're right. Everyone's out there, texting, eating, jerking off,
Speaker 1: getting drunk, getting hot, all the stuff, and you know,
Speaker 1: and and I get and look, I get, I get.
Speaker 1: You know, it's a lot of time in the car.
Speaker 1: It's a lot of your time. You can't you're there.
Speaker 1: People were trying to make this into a live time.
Speaker 1: It's it's typically dead time that we give of our
Speaker 1: lives to traffic, So why not lighten the time by
Speaker 1: jerking off and getting high and eating food, you know,
Speaker 1: the stuff we would do if we weren't in our car.
Speaker 7: Put all that stuff down and just pay attention to
Speaker 7: life and live in the moment.
Speaker 1: Get out of here.
Speaker 7: Who wants to do that, right, not in this day
Speaker 7: and age?
Speaker 1: Tyler, Do you have any Do you have any other thoughts, feelings, sentiments, questions, commons,
Speaker 1: concerns that you wish to share before we go? This
Speaker 1: was a good call. I enjoyed hearing your perspective on
Speaker 1: these things.
Speaker 7: Another thing, Please drivers that did it's just a NonStop thing.
Speaker 4: Please us truckers.
Speaker 7: We wait well. In the industry that I'm in, I
Speaker 7: can weigh up to eighty thousand pounds, and we got drivers,
Speaker 7: young drivers mostly that will cut in front of us
Speaker 7: at the last second to get their exit or just
Speaker 7: to merge back in front of us when we're coming
Speaker 7: up to a stoplight or something. It takes us about
Speaker 7: two football fields and more to stop that thing. And
Speaker 7: that's why there's so many accidents because people don't give
Speaker 7: us a space in front. It's important to do that,
Speaker 7: otherwise they're gonna be a pancake.
Speaker 8: Yeah.
Speaker 1: I don't even know how you. I don't even know
Speaker 1: how you drive that big ass truck around. They're too big.
Speaker 1: I can only do a tiny little time.
Speaker 7: I've been driving a long time.
Speaker 1: Well, I hope you drive for even longer.
Speaker 7: I'm pretty confident with my drivings.
Speaker 1: Well, Tyler, I hope you drive long and forever into
Speaker 1: the sunset. And uh, I hope you have a wonder
Speaker 1: for us of the night. Thank you.
Speaker 7: That's beautiful. Hey you too, shout out. It's a powerful condor.
Speaker 1: Have a good night, Tyler, he as well. Now, I
Speaker 1: don't want to be the guy who is driving behind
Speaker 1: the guy jerking off and he comes out the window
Speaker 1: and then you just drive into it and it gets
Speaker 1: all over your windshield. That's where I think things could
Speaker 1: go wrong. You ever played Mario Clark DS. You know
Speaker 1: the squid item where you prep you do it and
Speaker 1: it makes like ink go on everyone's screen. It's like that,
Speaker 1: but with come, I don't know what I'm talking about. Hello, Hello,
Speaker 1: How are you?
Speaker 4: This therapy?
Speaker 1: Is this mister V.
Speaker 8: This is mister V speaking.
Speaker 4: How are you tonight?
Speaker 1: I'm all right? How are you?
Speaker 4: Could be better, could be worse, could be worse.
Speaker 1: Totally, could always be better, totally, could always be worse,
Speaker 1: mister V. H How could it be worse?
Speaker 4: How could it be worse?
Speaker 8: Yes, well, I guess it goes to the root of
Speaker 8: why I'm calling in today, is uh. I used to
Speaker 8: be a teacher and I quit my job, and it's
Speaker 8: been about a year now and I'm doing something completely different,
Speaker 8: and I feel like my brain is turning into mush.
Speaker 8: To be quite honest, I feel like I'm getting dumber
Speaker 8: and dumber by the day with my new job, even
Speaker 8: though I get more money and I have literally zero responsibilities.
Speaker 8: But it's kind of weird. It's kind of weird now
Speaker 8: where I go home and I do this hard labor,
Speaker 8: and I come home and I and I look in
Speaker 8: my room and I see all these books I used
Speaker 8: to read. I'm like, what happened to that guy?
Speaker 1: Mmmmmmm? Why did you?
Speaker 8: And I hear about how schools are all I'll go ahead.
Speaker 1: No, no, no, please, I want to hear. I want
Speaker 1: to hear the rest of of what you're saying.
Speaker 8: Yeah, I just hear about how schools they're all super
Speaker 8: messed up, even getting worse. And I'm just like, well,
Speaker 8: I'm glad I'm not there, but I just I have
Speaker 8: like this inner need to go teach again. I just
Speaker 8: I need adults who can't do like falpilcation and really
Speaker 8: bad geography. I'm just like, why am I here? I
Speaker 8: should be, you know, teaching people fundamental skills.
Speaker 4: M M.
Speaker 1: That's super interesting. So okay, so how long ago did
Speaker 1: you leave your teaching job.
Speaker 8: It's it's it's gonna be a year now, okay.
Speaker 1: And you are saying that you're getting paid more and
Speaker 1: that you have less responsibilities, which are two things that
Speaker 1: I feel like a lot of people look for in gigs.
Speaker 1: Is more money for less work.
Speaker 6: Is that the.
Speaker 1: Main reason why you jump ship from being a teacher
Speaker 1: is because the software had more money and less work.
Speaker 8: I know, I mostly jumped ship from teaching because like
Speaker 8: it was a good, cozy job. Yeah, it was pretty cool.
Speaker 8: I got the summers off, I got a pretty decent
Speaker 8: salary and whatever. But COVID hit and turn everything upside down,
Speaker 8: and then I got paid the tame to do like
Speaker 8: way more work. To be honest, I know people think
Speaker 8: teachers just said at home, but it was like pretty
Speaker 8: intense to go from like a lot of social interaction
Speaker 8: to virtual interaction. And yeah, and I kind of got
Speaker 8: fed up with like the federal unemployment system. So like
Speaker 8: I was like a third year teacher, and the people
Speaker 8: who were getting the federal unemployment during the time of
Speaker 8: the pandemic, we're pretty much getting the same amount of
Speaker 8: money I was getting as a teacher. But I was
Speaker 8: devoting myself five days a week right online whatever, nine
Speaker 8: hours a day plus grading and planning all day on Sunday.
Speaker 8: And I just thought, well, this is bullshit. Fuck the system.
Speaker 8: But at the same time, I'm just like, well, how
Speaker 8: do I reach these kids to make sure they can
Speaker 8: go off to get decent careers and not get ripped
Speaker 8: off by like the ice cream man or no basic geography.
Speaker 1: I guess, so it sounds as though you have I
Speaker 1: mean aside from just money, you have external desires. You
Speaker 1: wish to help people and have a genuine desire to
Speaker 1: educate them, to reach these kids.
Speaker 8: Yeah, I was.
Speaker 4: I would I would say so.
Speaker 8: I would say so. And when you first just like, well,
Speaker 8: like it's kind of weird to be honest, like being
Speaker 8: a dude teacher and like kind of like doing bro
Speaker 8: things like I'm ripping my jewel and drinking a beer
Speaker 8: right now. But like you would meet these older teacher dudes, right,
Speaker 8: You meet these older dudes, and I was like, I
Speaker 8: don't really want to end up like these guys. You know,
Speaker 8: that looks kind of crappy, you know what I mean.
Speaker 8: But then I look at the people at my new job,
Speaker 8: I'm like, I don't want to end up.
Speaker 7: Like these people either. It sucks too.
Speaker 8: So I feel like it's just like a lose lose
Speaker 8: situation across the board. But at least I'm getting more money.
Speaker 3: But I work.
Speaker 8: I'm like from the Midwest, and like I work now
Speaker 8: in like an automobile factory, and I do like the
Speaker 8: same thing over like six hundred times a day. As
Speaker 8: much as like it was fun at the beginning, like oh,
Speaker 8: this is like super easy I just get paid to
Speaker 8: do this. But then after a while you're like, wow,
Speaker 8: like my brain is mush.
Speaker 1: Right now, like so so so hold on, hold, I
Speaker 1: want to stop. I want to stop you real quick.
Speaker 1: So you said that. You So you're at this teaching
Speaker 1: job and you're having uh whatever COVID's going on, the
Speaker 1: gig is changing all these sort of things, and you
Speaker 1: have these older teachers that you're looking at, and you're
Speaker 1: looking at them and you're going, I don't know if
Speaker 1: I want to be this guy when I'm you know,
Speaker 1: sixty years old. Whatever it is? What what is it
Speaker 1: about the older teachers that you look at and you
Speaker 1: see and it makes you go, I don't, I don't,
Speaker 1: I don't. I don't want that.
Speaker 8: Well, there was two case scenarios. We'll call him mister
Speaker 8: X and mister Y. Right, let's call mister X the
Speaker 8: good guy. Right, he was married, he had to get kids.
Speaker 8: But you can tell mister X, like, you know, he
Speaker 8: didn't have like nice things. He drove a beat up,
Speaker 8: you know, minivan. I'm pretty sure he probably struggled to
Speaker 8: pay the bills. And you know that I don't want
Speaker 8: to live a life like that, you know, taking care
Speaker 8: of my kids on a teacher salary.
Speaker 2: You know, it kind of sucks.
Speaker 8: But then there was mister Why. And mister Why was
Speaker 8: like the long term playboy bachelor who takes trips to
Speaker 8: the Netherlands in Columbia to do god knows what. And
Speaker 8: I'm like, well, I don't want to end up like that.
Speaker 4: Either, because that's a really shallow.
Speaker 8: Existence, you know. I'm like, that's like, that's even though
Speaker 8: they're completely polar opposites. I'm like, I feel that's you're
Speaker 8: gonna be one or the other. And they both sucked.
Speaker 1: I'm like, why why do you feel as though you
Speaker 1: can only be one or the other?
Speaker 8: I just I mean, like, well, I mean on a
Speaker 8: teacher's salary, it's kind of hard to kind of really
Speaker 8: do anything, to be quite honest. So like it's either
Speaker 8: you live for yourself only yourself, like you do your
Speaker 8: thing for the kids, obviously, but you really only live
Speaker 8: for yourself because you really don't make that much, or
Speaker 8: like you kind of do like the whole family thing.
Speaker 8: But then like when it's bill time, like fuck, like
Speaker 8: how am I going to do this? Like how am
Speaker 8: I going to put my kids through college?
Speaker 1: Mister V what's what what what's important to you? Because
Speaker 1: I know that you're looking at the and and I
Speaker 1: understand this. I understand this for sure. It's nice to
Speaker 1: have like models of you know what could be, but
Speaker 1: when you really think about it and you think about
Speaker 1: your life and you think about your options and you
Speaker 1: think about you know what, what is important to you?
Speaker 8: What's important to me is uh family, having like nice things,
Speaker 8: working hard, I guess, and being smart. I guess like
Speaker 8: I like to use my brain. I feel like I
Speaker 8: feel like this job like underutilizes me so much. I'm
Speaker 8: like I look like I don't know. I guess, like
Speaker 8: because it's been a whole year, right, and I like
Speaker 8: didn't teach. I had zero responsibilities. I had no I
Speaker 8: had zero like community commitment where I had to be
Speaker 8: like a role model citizen at the CPS and stuff
Speaker 8: like I could do whatever I want, Like I grew
Speaker 8: my hair out right, wore different shoes, like, wore different
Speaker 8: clothes like it was sweet. But then like as the
Speaker 8: year went on, I'm like, fuck, like kind of want
Speaker 8: some responsibilities. But then people look at the like you're
Speaker 8: fucking crazy.
Speaker 1: Well well, well, okay, so you say you have twenty
Speaker 1: six as well, okay, so you say you have not
Speaker 1: no responsibilities, but relatively minor responsibilities at this new gig.
Speaker 2: Yes, So.
Speaker 1: I don't know what would stop you then from trying
Speaker 1: to get creative because you seem like you're a creative
Speaker 1: guy and somebody can use your brain. I feel like
Speaker 1: for you, there could be a creative way on whatever
Speaker 1: your off time is to find a new type of venture.
Speaker 1: And I don't know what it would be. I'm not
Speaker 1: going to give you any sort of example because I
Speaker 1: don't I don't know. I just want to like plant
Speaker 1: the seed in your head of like that it's that
Speaker 1: it's possible. That's something to think about, Like what what
Speaker 1: would be the venture on the side for you that
Speaker 1: would allow you to use your brain, that would allow
Speaker 1: you to form a community? And I feel like, and
Speaker 1: again I'm playing armchair Gecko therapist here, but there's a
Speaker 1: there's a very very narrow binary thinking here of like
Speaker 1: I can either be this guy or I can be
Speaker 1: this guy. And it's like, my friend, we live in
Speaker 1: twenty twenty two, or an interconnected society we have, the
Speaker 1: computer we have, I mean, there's never been more tools
Speaker 1: available to human being to create community, to use their brain.
Speaker 1: And I would just sort of think in your off time,
Speaker 1: if you are telling me that you have more money
Speaker 1: and less responsibilities and you do have free time, I
Speaker 1: would I would only encourage you to at least think
Speaker 1: about ways in which in which you could form a
Speaker 1: new venture or activity or or something that could allow
Speaker 1: you to use your brain. Community you jam, I mean,
Speaker 1: that's a great that's a great idea. You know, there's
Speaker 1: something like that, you know, but it's.
Speaker 8: It's like, mister Ghek, like when you're a teacher, like
Speaker 8: it really you take it. You take it on fully.
Speaker 4: You know.
Speaker 8: It's hard to like walk in at the door at
Speaker 8: the end of the day and like put the teacher
Speaker 8: hat off, like it kind of stays on all the time. Yeah,
Speaker 8: you know what I mean. And then I just feel
Speaker 8: really conflicted with my identity nowadays, you know what I mean.
Speaker 8: Like before, when I was a teacher, I'd be at
Speaker 8: the store or around you know, people who had kids,
Speaker 8: and like I would like always test their timestables and
Speaker 8: can they can they can they do subtraction with money
Speaker 8: or anything? You know, just basic teacher stuff that I
Speaker 8: feel like kids could use and not be on their phones.
Speaker 8: And nowadays, I just like I look at kids, I'm
Speaker 8: just like, not my job, you know, it's not my
Speaker 8: job anymore. But then there's like a guilt on the inside.
Speaker 8: I'm like, well, that kid's not going to know the
Speaker 8: difference between China and Taiwan, you know what I mean.
Speaker 8: That's an important issue. I feel like most people should
Speaker 8: know about this kind of stuff or just any basic things.
Speaker 8: And especially because ironically enough, I was a science teacher
Speaker 8: who left during COVID because I realize education is just
Speaker 8: kind of not very scientific in regards to how they
Speaker 8: handle things. So it's just it's just like mister Gek.
Speaker 8: Just to be quite frank, it's just like, you know,
Speaker 8: how you're Lyle and your mister Ghek. It's like imagine
Speaker 8: hanging up the mister Ghek forever, you know, or something
Speaker 8: happened where you had to give up the mister Gek
Speaker 8: earth being mister Ghek became too much.
Speaker 1: You call me Gek. You don't have to call me
Speaker 1: mister Gek.
Speaker 8: It's a respect thing the teacher hats on, you know.
Speaker 8: But it's kind of that feeling, and I hope you
Speaker 8: never have that feeling, you know, walking away from something
Speaker 8: you're so passionate about because you have to, you know.
Speaker 1: Well, would you say a name was mister v mister
Speaker 1: v V In whatever you do, I wish you good luck.
Speaker 8: You take care of I'm mister go Thank you, mister Van.
Speaker 4: Yeah.
Speaker 1: I don't know why mister Ghak makes me feel super uncomfortable.
Speaker 1: I I don't. I don't.
Speaker 7: You know.
Speaker 1: I'm not a teacher, not a guru, never never, never
Speaker 1: had any interest in, never had any interest in presenting
Speaker 1: myself as such. Merely, truly, truly, I only wish to
Speaker 1: present myself and I hope I'm doing it. I hope
Speaker 1: I'm doing this properly, because sometimes I feel I'm afraid
Speaker 1: that I'm not. But I I really, truly, at the
Speaker 1: end of the day, I only wish to present myself
Speaker 1: as a crazy person in a gackle costume on the internet.
Speaker 10: Hello, Hello, Hello, Well hey, it's a good professor.
Speaker 1: Why do you say I'm a professor?
Speaker 4: Well, you didn't like mister, and you've got some credibility.
Speaker 8: I think I don't.
Speaker 3: But how are you doing?
Speaker 1: I don't know if I mean, I don't. Here's the thing.
Speaker 1: I know that there's people watching my stream and stuff.
Speaker 1: But I don't know if that inherently, I don't know
Speaker 1: if followers gives you inherent credibility. What do you I mean,
Speaker 1: what is your genuine opinion? What is your genuine opinion
Speaker 1: on that?
Speaker 4: Yeah, talks taught me that. TikTok has taught me that
Speaker 4: you will find a following in anything. And if you
Speaker 4: want to talk to the community, you're going to get it.
Speaker 8: But you you welcome and you embrace a welcome environment.
Speaker 5: Mm hmm.
Speaker 3: And so you stand out with a ruby.
Speaker 5: You know.
Speaker 1: Here's the thing, though, is you can say and if
Speaker 1: you like, like if your friend tells you something, you're like, well,
Speaker 1: who the fuck is this guy? Like if if you
Speaker 1: meet someone at a party and they start like saying
Speaker 1: giving you advice about something, or or going on spiel
Speaker 1: or making statements of opinion or anything like that, You're like,
Speaker 1: who is this person? What the fuck are they saying?
Speaker 1: But if you saw a TikTok of a rand of
Speaker 1: that same person, but of a random person. But you
Speaker 1: saw it and I had a bunch of like likes
Speaker 1: on it and a bunch of people commenting on it,
Speaker 1: it was it was like presented to you as media.
Speaker 1: You would be like, oh, what's this? I agree with that,
Speaker 1: but there's no difference between the two really, So everyone
Speaker 1: is just saying things and hoping that they resonate with
Speaker 1: people in some way, but there's no credibility to anyone. Hey,
Speaker 1: when people say things. I picked the worst thing to do.
Speaker 1: I picked a podcast where I say things and people
Speaker 1: say I hate saying things. I hate listening to things.
Speaker 1: I'm going to complete another nightmare.
Speaker 4: Hearing fingers in front of a turtle.
Speaker 1: How can I get you? This evening? I promise I'm
Speaker 1: gonna find a better thing to say to transition into
Speaker 1: like the what the part of the call where we
Speaker 1: talk about the thing, But for now I'm using how
Speaker 1: can we How can I get you? Yeah?
Speaker 4: Absolutely absolutely? For some advice, I don't know what the
Speaker 4: moderator told you. For a little side quest today, I
Speaker 4: accidentally drink my own year. Can you repeat that I
Speaker 4: have a relationship with Say that again?
Speaker 1: Can you repeat that.
Speaker 8: I drink my own year?
Speaker 4: In on accidents? This about seven o'clock. But I was
Speaker 4: mainly calling because I have a very nice relationship with
Speaker 4: a with a with a wonderful girl, and I've been
Speaker 4: just like trying to find jobs, and it's hard to
Speaker 4: put myself out there and find relationships and get get
Speaker 4: connected to people. It's applying LinkedIn and your forms it.
Speaker 4: Everybody wants something different and everyone says they're hiring, but
Speaker 4: they're not. And it's just I haven't been able to
Speaker 4: find employment. I'm just you know, I'm just kind of
Speaker 4: vibing through life, living at my parents and trying to
Speaker 4: remain happy. But yeah, what do you have to think
Speaker 4: about them?
Speaker 1: You said you drank your own urine this morning, not.
Speaker 4: This morning, this evening accidentally, because I pulled it all
Speaker 4: nighter and I went to go get some donuts from
Speaker 4: my family in the morning about five am. I was
Speaker 4: in the parking lot of h EB and Man, I
Speaker 4: just had to pee and I had tinted windows, so
Speaker 4: I had a.
Speaker 7: Little water bottle.
Speaker 2: You know.
Speaker 4: It got took care of it. I threw in my
Speaker 4: back right seat because I have a two door. I
Speaker 4: didn't want anyone happen to see it while I was
Speaker 4: inside shopping, right, so I threw it back there. Has
Speaker 4: forgotten about it. Me and my girlfriend when we were
Speaker 4: in my car, we always throw water bottles on the ground, right. Well,
Speaker 4: that's tonight I went to go pick up some cow
Speaker 4: zones right, some fresh mosaicoli and some boy some good dessert, and.
Speaker 8: I went to go.
Speaker 4: I was like, wow, I'm really parked. Once go grab
Speaker 4: some water from behind me instead of behind my seat.
Speaker 4: I went to the far back right. I forgot about
Speaker 4: my bottle and the disaster already hit me. Had to
Speaker 4: flush my mouth out with another little water bottle, add
Speaker 4: some kombusha. Some might say that was worse, but it
Speaker 4: was great.
Speaker 1: So you flushed out your mouth with a second water bottle.
Speaker 7: I what?
Speaker 1: And what did it tastes?
Speaker 7: Like?
Speaker 4: See, that's the thing. It's been really cold and texted lately,
Speaker 4: so it was about like forty outs today, and so
Speaker 4: instead of hot in like ammonia, it was kind of
Speaker 4: like a really watered down but slightly lemon added tastes
Speaker 4: to a very bad power aid for McDonald's served in
Speaker 4: the plastic cuts, you know, a really big large cups
Speaker 4: with too much ice. It was cold, it was it
Speaker 4: didn't do it. I opened up my window. I had
Speaker 4: to spit it out.
Speaker 3: I had to get some other water.
Speaker 4: I didn't think I was tell anybody to tonight, but
Speaker 4: I told my girlfriend and then we went to see
Speaker 4: when you had last put some footage, and it was Friday,
Speaker 4: and I'm like, oh, this man has a schedule. So
Speaker 4: that's where we're at. Lyle, is it okay if I
Speaker 4: say Lyle? My name is Jared.
Speaker 1: And how did this experience make you feel in the
Speaker 1: macro about your life as a whole?
Speaker 4: In the macro, I really need to move out. My
Speaker 4: mother's toxic. But in the macro some year it's not
Speaker 4: going to change that. My my every day was pretty good.
Speaker 4: I love my girlfriend. Your girlfriend is your hands shut
Speaker 4: a chill out.
Speaker 3: All to reach out?
Speaker 1: No, you're not allowed to reach out.
Speaker 8: Okay, Oh, I'm so.
Speaker 1: Sorry, you are breaking rules.
Speaker 4: I apologie. I just heard two mutics. But in the
Speaker 4: math ro it's changed me for the better. I'm glad
Speaker 4: it happened. It wasn't pleasant, but I've learned from it.
Speaker 1: What have you learned from it?
Speaker 4: Not to throw water bottles on the floor. And I'm
Speaker 4: not going to allow my girlfriend to do it either.
Speaker 4: Granted she doesn't pee in water bottles in my car.
Speaker 4: But you win some, you lose some, right like unmedicated
Speaker 4: adhd man, It's you have some great three four days,
Speaker 4: but then you have some depression naps for you know,
Speaker 4: about a week trying. It's hard to take care of
Speaker 4: yourself a shower. You really have to think about and
Speaker 4: work yourself into doing it because you know it's for
Speaker 4: the better, even if you don't go outside today, even
Speaker 4: if you're on the computer, just trying to shower yourself
Speaker 4: as hard after about two and a half three days.
Speaker 1: But yeah, what do you what do you do on
Speaker 1: the computer?
Speaker 4: So here's the thing, toxic trait. I know legal legends
Speaker 4: back in season three, but that that got me into
Speaker 4: building computers. But before that, my dad's an electronics engineers,
Speaker 4: so I always soldered and desoldered printed circuit boards with him.
Speaker 4: I already forgot where this question is going. I am
Speaker 4: are you addicted to anything? While?
Speaker 1: Am I addicted to anything?
Speaker 4: Yeah?
Speaker 8: Sugarh word heard.
Speaker 1: Maybe maybe a little bit of porn. I could probably,
Speaker 1: I could. I could probably reasonably quit porn for a while.
Speaker 4: Absolutely.
Speaker 1: I I don't think I'm addicted to weed. I think
Speaker 1: of all the of all the things.
Speaker 11: For the animated, you have the animated stuff, sorry to
Speaker 11: talk to over animated drawn you know hen Ti, Yeah, yeah, absolutely,
Speaker 11: the Jinci do you know the girlfriend's Twitter porn account.
Speaker 1: You know, no, what is that.
Speaker 4: Oh, she just has a Twitter account for her porn page.
Speaker 4: You know that's private because Twitter thinks that every single
Speaker 4: thing you like should be told to every single friend
Speaker 4: of yours. Crazy man, my bed's come to you.
Speaker 1: What do you say? Her name was.
Speaker 4: Jared.
Speaker 1: Thank you very much for calling Jared.
Speaker 4: Thank you so much, brother.
Speaker 1: But it is not really an expert