Speaker 1: Hey, Hello, Welcome to the Unofficial Expert Podcast with Sydney
Speaker 1: and Mahsomi. Hi guys, Hey, what's u? Sidney? Why did
Speaker 1: you laugh? Like? That's not my real name? I know,
Speaker 1: but it's just you know, it took you so long
Speaker 1: to get to where you are right now before you
Speaker 1: didn't even want to tell people your last name.
Speaker 2: Well, they still don't know my last name, they do you?
Speaker 2: They don't even know how to spell what I just said. Listeners,
Speaker 2: if you know how to spell what I just said,
Speaker 2: please slide in my DMS and find me on Instagram
Speaker 2: at reezi or e E E see why and uh
Speaker 2: just type it out or underneath our most recent photo
Speaker 2: on the Undividual Expert page.
Speaker 1: Just spell male sallyel or if you know my middle
Speaker 1: name at me. At just said BW j U s
Speaker 1: T s y D BW at me and tell me
Speaker 1: what my middle name is. I usually never tell anybody
Speaker 1: what my middle name means. Means, I mean, I guess
Speaker 1: stand for it means, but I know what it is. Yeah. Anyway, guys, Sydney,
Speaker 1: how are you doing? You know the holidays are coming up.
Speaker 1: It's it's a tough time for me.
Speaker 2: Really, Yeah, why is it tough because you don't like
Speaker 2: buying gifts for people.
Speaker 1: Well, every time this year comes around, either I make
Speaker 1: a ton of money or no money at all. It's
Speaker 1: so weird. It's like a back and forth. Like last year,
Speaker 1: I have coins coming in because I had two jobs,
Speaker 1: one for the clothes, one for my friends. I had
Speaker 1: so much money last year and now this holiday zeto.
Speaker 2: I feel like for me, this year started out good financially, right.
Speaker 2: We had that show on MTV and we did a
Speaker 2: bunch of episodes for that and it went like it
Speaker 2: was like international.
Speaker 1: I was like, look at me make money.
Speaker 2: And then after I got that last check in March, yeah,
Speaker 2: my money was like we're estranged, yes, And I'm like.
Speaker 1: But I but I need you and I right now
Speaker 1: I'm saying, how did you get here? I'm here looking
Speaker 1: at my finances like nobody's supposed to be here. Do
Speaker 1: you look at your finances? Though? I do, because I'm
Speaker 1: constantly looking at my City bank account because I never
Speaker 1: want to go somewhere and get embarrassed. Ever, really yes,
Speaker 1: Because waitressing, I see people get get cards to client
Speaker 1: and then I gotta slide them a note like if
Speaker 1: you read in this your called it's too late, call
Speaker 1: the bank.
Speaker 2: Did somebody's gonna get the client? And you went over
Speaker 2: and you were like, excuse me, Uh, did you like
Speaker 2: say out loud to embarrass them or did you normally
Speaker 2: like whisper.
Speaker 1: No, excuse me? I swept, I ranted three times. Always
Speaker 1: am like understanding because maybe you do have the money there?
Speaker 1: And yes, I'm not saying are you understanding, I'm saying,
Speaker 1: do you say real loud? No? Be cline no, because
Speaker 1: people are crazy. They don't want to be embarrassed in
Speaker 1: front of their friends that they probably don't even know that. Well, yeah,
Speaker 1: that's true. So I tapped them on the shoulder and
Speaker 1: I let them know. And then by the third card,
Speaker 1: By the third card, I said, sir, we're.
Speaker 2: Not gonna be going give you a card that w
Speaker 2: won't work and then they'll give you a third car.
Speaker 1: You actually be like, give me the whole while, and
Speaker 1: matter of fact, come with me. Come with me. Let's
Speaker 1: call it the bank, because I don't have time to
Speaker 1: be going back and forth with you. Is this a
Speaker 1: new card because there's still a sticker on it. No,
Speaker 1: there'll be no sticker. It'll be like broken in half.
Speaker 1: I'm like, sir, I wouldn't I gonna do it? This
Speaker 1: is a puzzle, right, Sure? Is this Elmer's? Is this
Speaker 1: Elmer's glue? And you holding this? Was this sticker butter
Speaker 1: is a statch tip? Yeah? I can't.
Speaker 2: What's the craziest excuse someone's ever giving you about their
Speaker 2: car being declined?
Speaker 1: The craziest there's no excuse. But somebody will literally show
Speaker 1: me how much money they have in their account. How
Speaker 1: much money they have in their account. Oh, and then
Speaker 1: I'll look at it a screenshot. No know, they'll go
Speaker 1: in their account and look, the money's there. The money
Speaker 1: one times not coming through. One time somebody had over
Speaker 1: nine hundred thousand dollars in the nine hundred that was
Speaker 1: just one of the cards, and the car got declined.
Speaker 2: Yes, you see, listeners, just because they got a little
Speaker 2: bit more money than me, they doing better than you.
Speaker 1: So his car got getting declined. Yeah, but he was like, oh,
Speaker 1: I just came back from overseas blah blah blah, so
Speaker 1: you know it's probably the bank or whatever. And he's like,
Speaker 1: I can show you another card. I was like, yeah,
Speaker 1: show me another card, and they gave me another card.
Speaker 1: And then Dad doesn't go through. He ended up having
Speaker 1: a fucking freeze on all his accounts. There was a
Speaker 1: bank was like, you're not in New York. He has
Speaker 1: his fraudulent accounts, and so finally he gets the money
Speaker 1: for me and get he got all this money, but
Speaker 1: he gave me a fifteen percent tip.
Speaker 2: My nigga, you don't have twenty five.
Speaker 1: He got twenty five, but his accounts were just frozen.
Speaker 2: You were there, Yeah, but you got the money, So
Speaker 2: give me that twenty five for wasting my time.
Speaker 1: Well that's true.
Speaker 2: And you probably after saw, after seeing how much money
Speaker 2: he had, you were like, oh, well, let me be
Speaker 2: a little bit more.
Speaker 1: Patient with Bruce. Listen. This is what I would sing
Speaker 1: when I would when I would have to like drop
Speaker 1: the check. I'd be like, when I dropped that check,
Speaker 1: I hope it's fifty five percent, fifty five percent, fifty
Speaker 1: five percent. When I dropped a check, I hope I
Speaker 1: get fifty five percent. I don't know that song. Could
Speaker 1: you just make that up? No? This is what I
Speaker 1: would say, Like sometimes it would work too. This is
Speaker 1: the song that you made up. This is the radio. Yeah,
Speaker 1: this is what I would hope that I would get more. Oh, okay,
Speaker 1: twenty five or like twenty percent, tip, I would want
Speaker 1: to get fifty five. Fifty five percent is half of
Speaker 1: what it is, yes, plus five percent? Yees. So if
Speaker 1: the check is two hundred dollars, you want me to
Speaker 1: give you one hundred and ten dollars, yes, tip, Yes,
Speaker 1: and it has happened before. I'm sure it has. But
Speaker 1: I don't owe you fifty five percent. Yes, yes, Marie,
Speaker 1: you're talking about somebody who's frugal, and you know they
Speaker 1: don't know when ay money is coming in. I'm talking
Speaker 1: about people who are extra wealthy who can just give
Speaker 1: it away. Yeah.
Speaker 2: But people who are wealthy don't give their money away.
Speaker 2: That's why they're still rich. You'd be surprised, listen, No,
Speaker 2: you be surprised. I've been seeing people with money and
Speaker 2: I like. So we have a friend.
Speaker 1: Am I gonna put this pardal blast? Yeses.
Speaker 2: So we have a friend who works with a real
Speaker 2: housewife of New York or something like that. Right, So
Speaker 2: the real housewife husband is sick. She talks about it
Speaker 2: on the show. So we not revealing client doctor confidentiality
Speaker 2: or whatever the hell that word is. Okay, So she
Speaker 2: said that the woman's husband has cancer, right, and she
Speaker 2: needed a hospital bed for him.
Speaker 1: Oh I remember that.
Speaker 2: She was like, the bed, the hospital bed was gonna
Speaker 2: cost five thousand dollars. And she was like, I'm just
Speaker 2: gonna call the place and have them give me a
Speaker 2: free bed.
Speaker 1: So she called the place to get like a hot end.
Speaker 2: Luxurious like fancy people. Soho house bid that was when
Speaker 2: cost us five thousand dollars. And she called and she says, Hi,
Speaker 2: I'm so and so from the Real Housewives of New York.
Speaker 2: And if the person on the other line don't know
Speaker 2: who she is, she hangs up, and then she calls
Speaker 2: back and says it again until somebody who recognizes her
Speaker 2: picks up the phone.
Speaker 1: She got the bed for free?
Speaker 2: What she got the five thousand dollars hospital bed for
Speaker 2: three And then her leg go to line is I'm
Speaker 2: worth thirty six million dollars. Apparently as well, she screams
Speaker 2: on the show, I'm worth thirty six million dollars. I
Speaker 2: don't have time for this. That's her leg line. My dude,
Speaker 2: husband is worth thirty six million dollars, not her, But
Speaker 2: she got the bed for free, like so, I mean,
Speaker 2: imagine what a real basketball a real basketball wife for
Speaker 2: a a sheba charae.
Speaker 1: What they're saying.
Speaker 2: What they're saying when they call someplace like, hey, i'm
Speaker 2: shot too, I'm calling from chateau. I should be getting
Speaker 2: a free blacktop from my chateau.
Speaker 1: Right, So that's how people keep their money. They literally
Speaker 1: make sure they get shit for free.
Speaker 2: That's true, right, And people who are famous are used
Speaker 2: to getting things for free. Right because famous people get things.
Speaker 1: For like sent to them, right, Like Marie, people would
Speaker 1: be sending you stuff. What's up with that? I'm not famous, yeah,
Speaker 1: but people be sending you hair and shy yeah yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: I mean tell the people about this, uh this hair situation.
Speaker 2: Well, let me tell you something. My hair is, you know,
Speaker 2: it's doing what it needs to do for TV. But
Speaker 2: this company sent me. They were like, oh, we want
Speaker 2: to send you some virgin, you know, human hair.
Speaker 1: It's gonna be dope. Shout out to this place. That's terrible.
Speaker 1: And so they were like, here's our website and check
Speaker 1: it out. I checked the website out. I was like,
Speaker 1: this looks like a scam, right, I said, everybody, all
Speaker 1: the models look like they got taken. You don't have
Speaker 1: the scammer.
Speaker 2: It looks like a scam right because the pictures of
Speaker 2: the hair, it was like stuff that they ripped from
Speaker 2: other people's websites and then they put on the website.
Speaker 1: Because nothing matched colored grating, it was off, and then
Speaker 1: the filters were the same. I was like, this looks
Speaker 1: like her hair. This looks like Spanish people hair, right,
Speaker 1: But Jalla was saying that it's awake. So they sent
Speaker 1: me the hair.
Speaker 2: In my mind, I was like, Oh, this is probably
Speaker 2: gonna be really bad, but it's gonna be a good
Speaker 2: video on YouTube, right, and you're off for the story,
Speaker 2: I mean on in bad hair you told me, And
Speaker 2: I was like, yep, I think I'm okay with that.
Speaker 1: I think you should do it.
Speaker 2: So you know, you can get the hair like density,
Speaker 2: you can get the wig thicker.
Speaker 1: So I asked for the thickets that they had and.
Speaker 2: They were like, hmm, it's gonna take us an extra
Speaker 2: couple weeks to send that to you.
Speaker 1: I said, good, send me the thin hair.
Speaker 2: So they send me the hair via DHL okay, so
Speaker 2: like dial up FedEx that the DHL god comes.
Speaker 1: I'm like, oh, he's cute, but you worked for DHL.
Speaker 2: Nothing No, eating on no money. I opened the hair
Speaker 2: and it looks like they put a bunch of like
Speaker 2: pubes on a lace wig.
Speaker 1: You're doing a lot. No, it was like it was
Speaker 1: not good hair.
Speaker 2: It's like it looks like when you get your hair
Speaker 2: cut or you comb your hair, all the dead hair
Speaker 2: that falls out, Like it was the end. The ends
Speaker 2: were all broken, real straggly, like at least like three
Speaker 2: or four inches need to be cut off.
Speaker 1: It needed some Moroccan oil. It needed a hot oil treatment.
Speaker 2: It needed that that hair cholesterol, that hair cholesterol that
Speaker 2: they sell at the Beauties of Black Story, right, or
Speaker 2: some carrot oil or whatever. So I tried to make
Speaker 2: it work.
Speaker 1: I did. I mean, let me tell you. Listen, listeners. No,
Speaker 1: I saw the video Marie starts off with the hair
Speaker 1: wrapped around her neck. You're like, let's get into it.
Speaker 1: When I saw it, I was like, already know this
Speaker 1: ship is rude shade. And I was like, I don't
Speaker 1: know if we'll ever get it hair hair again. Nah.
Speaker 1: Not from these people. I mean, they hit me up.
Speaker 1: They tried it.
Speaker 2: They were like, our lawyers will contact you if you
Speaker 2: don't take this video down immediately.
Speaker 1: Why you the one sending the terrible ass hair. First
Speaker 1: of all, do you know how important it is? First
Speaker 1: of all, you on TV, you doing things, We're taking photos,
Speaker 1: We on the ground, We got followers and likes and whatnot.
Speaker 1: You can't have us out here looking crazy. Yes, I
Speaker 1: don't care. Is free.
Speaker 2: And then you want us to review it so we
Speaker 2: can lie and have our good brothers and sisters putting
Speaker 2: on a terrible lace.
Speaker 1: From us exactly because you know I hate a terrible wig.
Speaker 1: I mean, I'll take a photo and post it in
Speaker 1: my IGCS. Okay, and I will I.
Speaker 2: Will try to blur the lines out so good so
Speaker 2: you can't tell that my wig is CBS blurred line.
Speaker 2: I'll do what I can, but whatever, I hate a
Speaker 2: bad wig too.
Speaker 1: It's bad. But they send me a bad stuff.
Speaker 2: And the thing is, the common misconception is when you're famous,
Speaker 2: like online famous, they send you the good stuff, and
Speaker 2: then when people your followers order the same thing, they
Speaker 2: send them.
Speaker 1: The bad crap.
Speaker 2: Which they just sent me the bad stuff, So I
Speaker 2: can't even imagine what they would send people who are
Speaker 2: actually spending money.
Speaker 1: And the thing is is that I read a lot
Speaker 1: of like comments on like black women, like blogs and stuff.
Speaker 1: That's the first thing they do is go on the hair.
Speaker 1: They go in on the fucking hair. They're like, oh
Speaker 1: well it's not blended right the hair.
Speaker 2: Remember Gabby Douglas, she was like sixteen going to like
Speaker 2: do the gymnastics at the Olympics and people were like
Speaker 2: her hair, she need a perm those.
Speaker 1: They look crazy dumb. That's not even we're talking about
Speaker 1: like love and hip hop. When I watch that show,
Speaker 1: I'm like, VH one, y'all have no budget. Do these
Speaker 1: people show up with they own wigs? They do, or
Speaker 1: they just have no budget for hair they do. That's
Speaker 1: the whole budget is hair and eyelashes.
Speaker 2: I doubt it because these wigs are so beauty supply store.
Speaker 2: Oh by it, But why beauty supply store. It's the
Speaker 2: beauty supply story where you can get your nails done in.
Speaker 1: The back as well. That's how mad the hair is.
Speaker 1: Shout out to the VH one perpetuating stereo stereotypes. Let's
Speaker 1: see you Mona Scott. Mona Scott apparently is Haitian. I
Speaker 1: think I read that. But her hair looks great. Well,
Speaker 1: Mona's getting checks from several shows.
Speaker 2: Her hair looks great. Her hair looks real, does it?
Speaker 2: I mean, does that could play into the her being
Speaker 2: Haitian thing? You know West Indians have better hair than
Speaker 2: everybody else.
Speaker 1: Let me just google it real quick. But I think
Speaker 1: that it's just a thing. Like when you watch Real Housewives.
Speaker 2: Of any of the housewives, they all got fake hair
Speaker 2: pieces in they all wear too much makeup, but no
Speaker 2: one wears more makeup than the Atlanta Housewives.
Speaker 1: They be having like full beat face, but Kenya Moore
Speaker 1: looks great though it's too much. It's too much much.
Speaker 1: This is what happens when you let gay men do
Speaker 1: your makeup. Ooh, I'm telling you, are we doing that now?
Speaker 1: I'm doing it right now because like gay men, Yes,
Speaker 1: a beat face for like a performance or an event,
Speaker 1: but for like brunch at the Olive Tree, okay, or
Speaker 1: going to see Peter at his like mom's house.
Speaker 2: In regular life, No, you don't need a b face.
Speaker 2: But these four K cameras are ruthless. They will pick
Speaker 2: up every crease and crack your face.
Speaker 1: It's the cameras are unnecessary. This is my problem with
Speaker 1: TV nowadays is that they have the camera so zoom
Speaker 1: the fuck in. No, give me some pixelated ship. Yeah,
Speaker 1: you to get all up and through my face like that.
Speaker 1: So this is why women are caking on makeup because
Speaker 1: the camera, this camera is used for dude outdoors.
Speaker 2: It's there's four K makeup, there's HD primers, there's stuff
Speaker 2: that you can use that will make it look even.
Speaker 2: But their makeup be looking like waffle maker crumbs.
Speaker 1: It'd be like fick. It looks it's thick, thick because
Speaker 1: the camera picks up everything.
Speaker 2: First of all, the first of all four K cameras
Speaker 2: was invented by a man, a man who was like,
Speaker 2: I don't know mountain climbing. He was like, oh, I
Speaker 2: want to see the sky better.
Speaker 1: I want to see the trees. I don't see the
Speaker 1: northern lights. Yes, he's like, I want to see I
Speaker 1: don't know the skyline. So they get these cameras that
Speaker 1: are built for I don't know, buildings and bricks and
Speaker 1: wood and leaves and shit, and then they put that
Speaker 1: on somebody's face, somebody who's thirty five. Do you know
Speaker 1: life is hard? Cannon? I will kill you, Cannon, Sony Nikon.
Speaker 1: All you people are terrible because I look at myself.
Speaker 1: You know we did that, you know we'd be doing
Speaker 1: videos and stuff. I'll be looking and I'm like, ooh,
Speaker 1: give me an old camera. Don't give me this new
Speaker 1: updated show a lens. Yes, because I honestly it will
Speaker 1: make me overanalyze my freaking face. I understand Sydney.
Speaker 2: First of all, all the cameras that are used are
Speaker 2: not four K cameras.
Speaker 1: They were not using four K cameras for us. That
Speaker 1: was not what that was.
Speaker 2: A four K camera is a thirty thousand dollar camera.
Speaker 2: The checks that we were getting from them, it was
Speaker 2: not thirty thousand dollars camera budget money, but vhe H
Speaker 2: one viacom period cheap.
Speaker 1: They're not spending thirty thousand dollars cameras. They might be hearing, they're.
Speaker 2: Not listening to the podcast, and I will stand by
Speaker 2: them being cheap because when my lawyer Rich tell you listen,
Speaker 2: all I'm all gonna say is you don't need that
Speaker 2: much makeup. Like I'll watch a YouTube tutorial and it'll
Speaker 2: be like, no makeup, makeup, quick, instant look, and then
Speaker 2: you'd be like.
Speaker 1: Am I watching the videos?
Speaker 2: Still eighteen minutes later, we still doing the face We
Speaker 2: got a highlight on. I'm tired of the contour it's
Speaker 2: like your face is already three D boom, like you're
Speaker 2: trying to back your face come out more.
Speaker 1: Well, that's for people with like round cheeks like Mariah
Speaker 1: Carey stay with a contour but puffy. Stop drinking vodka girl,
Speaker 1: but she got them chipmunk cheeks and with a line
Speaker 1: across the vodka and percocets. That has nothing to do.
Speaker 1: Her face was never that round before. It wasn't. She
Speaker 1: used to be really really thin. I remember, Oh Visions
Speaker 1: of Love Mariah Carey's face life. That's life on her
Speaker 1: right now.
Speaker 2: Speaking of life, I'm giving all my Haitian listeners life
Speaker 2: right now. Mona Scott is indeed Haitian American. She's also
Speaker 2: fifty years old. She was born she was born in Queen.
Speaker 2: Did you see Jocelyne like quit the show and like
Speaker 2: try to read her what she's saying. I watched this
Speaker 2: on the Wendy. It was Wendy Williams played the clip.
Speaker 2: Can we talk about Wendy real quick?
Speaker 1: Wait? What do we want to talk about first? Okay,
Speaker 1: So Wendy just played the clip and it was like
Speaker 1: Jocelyne was like, I quit that show. I'm not doing
Speaker 1: because Mona Scott, and she was like, you know, it
Speaker 1: was very un Scott can suck my deck basic basically,
Speaker 1: and she like jumped in her car and like the
Speaker 1: window rolled up, but she like didn't have a button.
Speaker 2: She like cranked it by hand. I feel like, anyway,
Speaker 2: you gotta watch it on a Wendy.
Speaker 1: Yeah, but Wendy fainted this week.
Speaker 2: Funny people are sick out here, Yeah, Sidney people are sick.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 2: Actually, you just found out that one of my friends,
Speaker 2: Merriment I have diabetes.
Speaker 1: You know what, Marie, Honestly, I'm so through with you.
Speaker 1: Nothing is sacred. I didn't say any names. I didn't
Speaker 1: say my friend Sidney might have diabetes. You have no friends.
Speaker 1: Every time you say my friend, they're like, Sidney.
Speaker 2: I fact, I said one of my friends.
Speaker 1: My friend. One of my friends are like, oh no,
Speaker 1: gotta be Sidney. You're saying that. You doing that? They
Speaker 1: got friends like I. At least how many episodes have
Speaker 1: we done fifty three? Have at least.
Speaker 2: Fifty three friends listen ape to uh Wendy Williams and
Speaker 2: her wigs.
Speaker 1: I think she was overheated. She was just overheated and
Speaker 1: her sugar was probably low. I watched the video. Many
Speaker 1: times when people faint, their eyes rolling the back of
Speaker 1: their head, they fall down. She looks scared, She slurred
Speaker 1: her words, she backed up, she felled out. So what
Speaker 1: do you think it is?
Speaker 2: People are saying that you they think she had a
Speaker 2: mini stroke or like a baby heart attack, because when
Speaker 2: you faint, you don't have time to look scared.
Speaker 1: Your body just drops. So you think she had a stroke.
Speaker 1: I think she had a little mini stroke. Well, she
Speaker 1: looked like she got a stroke already, so I could I.
Speaker 2: Could, oh see, Oh okay, Well she has thyroid problems. Also,
Speaker 2: apparently she is what's the she's she don't have good
Speaker 2: equilibrium whatever that words vertigo, vertigo she got she got vertigo.
Speaker 2: So she's like six feet tall, six feet plus in heels.
Speaker 1: She got a lot going on. You know, my prayers
Speaker 1: are out with you, thought and prayers and prayers for
Speaker 1: Whitney Williams.
Speaker 2: I hope you get well, get your vitamins up, a
Speaker 2: lot of nerdy, I know, ab CD.
Speaker 1: I need all of that too. I actually had to
Speaker 1: do some blood work. I'm going through some shit too.
Speaker 1: Damn dude, you want to get into it. I mean,
Speaker 1: I feel like the listeners need to know more about us.
Speaker 1: Go ahead, Sis, you know, I had some numbness, some
Speaker 1: tingless ness going in my foot, in my cisy theorea
Speaker 1: last longer than six hours. You gotta go to the doctor.
Speaker 1: I don't take ci Ali's bitch. No. I have like
Speaker 1: something was going on with my hands and my feet.
Speaker 1: So what did it feel like? It felt like you
Speaker 1: know when your foot falls asleep. It felt like that
Speaker 1: in my feet and in my hands. So like if
Speaker 1: you if your feet were numb, if you poked them,
Speaker 1: did you feel that? Yeah? I felt it. I don't
Speaker 1: know what web m D did you web MD WEBCD.
Speaker 1: They were like, it could be diabetes, but it also
Speaker 1: was like I had a lot of caffeine that weekend.
Speaker 1: I had a whole bunch of espresso. So that you
Speaker 1: can you can send me. I don't have to be
Speaker 1: a doctor to tell you too much coffee, too much.
Speaker 1: You can o d on caffeine. You can o d
Speaker 1: on water.
Speaker 2: It's called drowning, and water is good for you. You can
Speaker 2: give yourself like pneumonia, dude, So what you're gonna do?
Speaker 1: We waiting for the blood work. Waiting for the blood work.
Speaker 1: Thoughts and prayers for a year, for your girls, for
Speaker 1: my friend who may or may not have diabetes. I
Speaker 1: mean honestly, when I went, my blood pressure is low. Yes,
Speaker 1: so I was like, oh, I can't have diabetes. I
Speaker 1: feel like you're blood pressure has to be high. Yeah.
Speaker 2: I don't know how that works, blood pressure and stuff
Speaker 2: like that, but I know that when your blood pressure
Speaker 2: is low, the doctor be like, are you tired?
Speaker 1: That means you're probably tired a lot. Yes, that's a
Speaker 1: symptom of having low blood pressure. Yes, I'm always tired.
Speaker 1: I needed a nap in the middle of the day today.
Speaker 2: You sure did. I was getting ready. I was here
Speaker 2: doing work in the studio and Ciity was.
Speaker 1: Like, the studio today is at my house with my
Speaker 1: fucking cats, my kitty litter. Uh, I mean the cat house, y'all.
Speaker 1: It's a lot of cats. They were just like meowing
Speaker 1: on the other episode. Yeah, you're gonna hear them in
Speaker 1: the background, but they're screaming because they're trying to find
Speaker 1: out if I have diabetes.
Speaker 2: Like you know, they say animals sense things before if
Speaker 2: we're humans, they can sense the diabetes.
Speaker 1: Dude. I just I hope that I'm okay because honestly,
Speaker 1: I can't afford diabetes anything.
Speaker 2: That's my main goes. I just want to just a
Speaker 2: quick flashback. Who's like, oh, you know what, let me
Speaker 2: do my finances this. You know I could afford diabetes
Speaker 2: or some sort of illness. You don't you know what
Speaker 2: my budget is right now. Yeast infection. Yeah, I got
Speaker 2: yeast infection because that goes away in like a couple
Speaker 2: of days. I actually I have never had a YaST infection.
Speaker 2: I don't know how much they cost. It's like you
Speaker 2: gotta drink something to clear that out.
Speaker 1: Antibotics. Yeah, took a couple of pills. You take some
Speaker 1: grammary juice, cranberry pills.
Speaker 2: You flush it, flush it down, ut shut downs, Get up,
Speaker 2: shut up.
Speaker 1: I think it's a UTI is uh grammarry es. I
Speaker 1: have no idea what a U t I and a
Speaker 1: uh yeast infection? Well, yeast is the actual dough. Yeah,
Speaker 1: like the materials if you legit.
Speaker 2: I almost said call us now, but we can't have
Speaker 2: you guys call us. But one of these days I
Speaker 2: gonna be able to call us. We're gonna do a
Speaker 2: live podcast.
Speaker 1: Honestly, I really feel like people calling us would be dope.
Speaker 1: You know I pick up. First of all, I'll be
Speaker 1: like hello, hello, and like man like hold on, hey,
Speaker 1: she can't come to the phone right now, or yeah,
Speaker 1: what's up? And it's like I know that was you.
Speaker 1: I've done that before. Oh me too. You pick up
Speaker 1: and you were like and then you're like, I'm a
Speaker 1: call the one eight hundred numbers that be calling. They'd
Speaker 1: be like man speak Tosney Watcher. We're like, oh, you
Speaker 1: have the wrong number. I don't even pick up a
Speaker 1: one eight hundred number. Dude, you picking up eight hundred numbers?
Speaker 1: Mm hmm. Sometimes they did. They do from six for
Speaker 1: six and I pick up. Dude, I got Sally May
Speaker 1: blocked on my phone? How do you do that? Listen?
Speaker 1: I upgraded.
Speaker 2: I updated my phone so it looks like I have
Speaker 2: a brand new iPhone. It's the same raggedy six s
Speaker 2: and thank you so much. And there's a thing you
Speaker 2: can like black people from calling you on your phone.
Speaker 1: It's beautiful. It's great Sydney speak of great Harvey Whitstein. Oh,
Speaker 1: let's talk about it. It's honestly, I'm not I'm not surprised.
Speaker 1: I'm not surprised by in twenty and seventeen has been
Speaker 1: so motherfucking predictable.
Speaker 2: Every time something come up, I'll be like, uh yeah
Speaker 2: that fits with the yeah, yeah yeah.
Speaker 1: Like twenty seventeen has been like that drunk fucking friend
Speaker 1: that calls you the next day after she had a
Speaker 1: crazy night and it's like, I'm never drinking again. Yeah,
Speaker 1: And she's like, she tells you something else and you're like, girl,
Speaker 1: what else can you shit on? You literally have shipped
Speaker 1: on everything everything. What else can you do? It's like
Speaker 1: two thousands. It's like so bad, but so I don't
Speaker 1: know what the number is.
Speaker 2: Harvey Wystein is going for the record, the white r Kelly, uh,
Speaker 2: the white Bill Cosby, Bill Cosby, he is, he is
Speaker 2: Bill Cosby, except Bill Cosby was using drugs. Harby Weinstein
Speaker 2: was just like, I'm white and powerful.
Speaker 1: He was using his white privilege, which is worse than
Speaker 1: roofy Hello, okay, because I can see it.
Speaker 2: I see the white privilege. I just wake up and
Speaker 2: I'm like, why am I bot sore with the Bill?
Speaker 1: He said, you know what, He's like, I don't need drugs.
Speaker 1: He said that. He said that.
Speaker 2: But the thing with me about hi, because I'm not
Speaker 2: surprised about the Harvey Weinstein stuff. The thing about me
Speaker 2: that that got me was when he the Lupita stuff
Speaker 2: came out, because you know, in my mind, she's like
Speaker 2: my sister, like legit, my mom acts like she's one
Speaker 2: of her kids. I said, get the gun, Get the
Speaker 2: motherfucker gun. I called my mom. I was like, my man,
Speaker 2: he came for Loopitzza. He didn't touch her, though, Listen
Speaker 2: to what happen. I'm gonnaell you as a story real quick.
Speaker 2: I'm gonnaive you the little synopsis. So Lupita wrote an
Speaker 2: article for the New York Times It's It's there, or
Speaker 2: one of those magazines or newspaper. It was well written,
Speaker 2: it was well, I mean, she educated.
Speaker 1: But apparently what happened was when she was still a
Speaker 1: student at Yale, she met Harvey Weinstein at some event
Speaker 1: and he was like, oh, you're an actress, Yeah we
Speaker 1: should connect.
Speaker 2: And she was like, he a little creepy and people
Speaker 2: were like, yeah, he's creepy, but he's, you know, the
Speaker 2: most powerful person in Hollywood. So he invited her to
Speaker 2: his house. She went to go see a movie that
Speaker 2: he was showing. Her was there, She's like, cool, this
Speaker 2: is safe, this is super. Fifteen minutes into the movie,
Speaker 2: he's like, I.
Speaker 1: Want to show you something. She's like, I'm watching the movie.
Speaker 2: He's like, knowing Lupete, she probably said film, I'm watching
Speaker 2: the film, and he's like, we'll be right back.
Speaker 1: They go up to his bedroom. He's like, I'm gonna
Speaker 1: give you a massage.
Speaker 2: She said she panicked, but she didn't want him touch her,
Speaker 2: so she was like, what if I give you a
Speaker 2: massage and he was like, ah yeah, And then he
Speaker 2: was like, I'm gonna take off my pants and she
Speaker 2: was like, I'm gonna leave. So he never touched her,
Speaker 2: but then it was like every every time she saw
Speaker 2: him after.
Speaker 1: That, he was like, listen, I got a room in
Speaker 1: this hotel upstairs. Let's just get the food to go.
Speaker 2: Like it was like every time it was like a
Speaker 2: little bit more creepy.
Speaker 1: But do you know with this Anglo Saxon, Dusty Musty
Speaker 1: get into it, dishrag looking dude. He ended up saying, oh,
Speaker 1: I recall something else. I would never Yeah.
Speaker 2: He he denied hers sdifically, like he was like, oh no,
Speaker 2: that never.
Speaker 1: I never.
Speaker 2: I never touched her, Like, dude, you at the bottom
Speaker 2: of the barrel right now. You said, you shutting down
Speaker 2: a queen. Yeah, He's like, I wouldn't. Why would I
Speaker 2: do that? Why, Like, of all the things that you
Speaker 2: should be denying, that's the one that you denying everybody?
Speaker 1: He said, yes, yes, yes, White Hose. I didn't even
Speaker 1: even have heard of, didn't even know they were actresses.
Speaker 2: Okay, Lou Pizza your award winning He.
Speaker 1: Said, yeah, Nah, that's not gonna work. He said, Actually,
Speaker 1: I don't recall it happening like that. I don't. He
Speaker 1: was like, I don't know her, and that cart that's
Speaker 1: the fuck.
Speaker 2: That thing about Hollywood is like, now we got a
Speaker 2: bat for our sister, Like, wait, are you saying that
Speaker 2: she's not good enough? You're purv Penis is too good
Speaker 2: for her.
Speaker 1: Yeah. So it's it's fucking It's just it's so annoying,
Speaker 1: and like it's crazy because I met him several times,
Speaker 1: like I've can we.
Speaker 2: Talk about this everything you say to say allegedly alleged,
Speaker 2: allegedly I served him, Okay, allegedly Penelope.
Speaker 1: Cruise was there. Oh how was she is? She? Pretty? Well?
Speaker 1: She was she was crying. I think something had happened,
Speaker 1: like a friend had passed away. But or he was like,
Speaker 1: I got a room upstairs. Let me no, no, no, no, no,
Speaker 1: It wasn't like that. It was several people were at
Speaker 1: the table, okay, but she was crying. She had a
Speaker 1: thick ass accent. Yeah, she's like super Spanish, she's very Spaniard.
Speaker 1: But that was cool. He was like trying to make
Speaker 1: sure that she was He was comforting her. He was
Speaker 1: making sure were his hands on her shoulders. A gross
Speaker 1: you touched her shoulder. He made sure I kept getting
Speaker 1: her like diet coke or whatever. Next time I see him,
Speaker 1: he's at my job. He's getting punched in the fucking
Speaker 1: face by Allegedly he got punched in the face by
Speaker 1: a DJ that worked there. Oh, a female, you know,
Speaker 1: a male DJ that was about four to eleven. I was,
Speaker 1: I was like, I was like, you need a stool
Speaker 1: just to get to his face. My man on the
Speaker 1: turn to he bus driver upper cut that man. You
Speaker 1: go learn today that allegedly the story was about the
Speaker 1: DJ had touched his friends but a female. But I
Speaker 1: don't I don't think that's what exactly happened. But whatever
Speaker 1: the case is, he got uppercutted. The table flipped over.
Speaker 1: It was a mess. It was a real fight. There
Speaker 1: was a scuffle. The DJ left got fired. No, oh
Speaker 1: that's cute. Your job is cute. He didn't get fired,
Speaker 1: he still had a job, which I was like, wait,
Speaker 1: that's what happens when t was he was white. Yeah,
Speaker 1: and I was like, this is when two white people
Speaker 1: fight collide, when the white on white crime, there's so
Speaker 1: much power that like nobody nobody pressed the charge. Nobody
Speaker 1: pressed the charges were like, let's just act like this
Speaker 1: didn't happen. And then it was in page six and
Speaker 1: it was a mess, was in page six six.
Speaker 2: Well, I think that's the thing when when when white
Speaker 2: worlds collide, what happens is they're like, I don't.
Speaker 1: Have time to fight you right now, I'm rich, and
Speaker 1: then they walk away. But the crazy thing is that
Speaker 1: it was a DJ like you work your son. How
Speaker 1: you can't just hit somebody? That's true.
Speaker 2: Like if you, as a server hit somebody, you would
Speaker 2: get fired.
Speaker 1: No, no, no, me as a black server, they were
Speaker 1: z that was they were jazzy. Jeff my ass any
Speaker 1: may not Well that was a silent black I said,
Speaker 1: you as a interest, right, it was that read but yeah,
Speaker 1: it was it was just crazy because now coming back
Speaker 1: to twenty seventeen, I'm like, oh, he deserved to get uppercuted,
Speaker 1: Like it don't matter what happened now knowing I was like,
Speaker 1: I bet you that DJ is like yeah I did it. Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: it's a proud moment.
Speaker 2: I mean, but all the stuff that's coming out is
Speaker 2: not surprising to me. That's how Hollywood has always worked.
Speaker 2: Like I would hear things stories about like the casting couch,
Speaker 2: like that is just like code for you. Won't You're
Speaker 2: gonna lay on his couch and give me some and
Speaker 2: I'm gonna put you in my movie.
Speaker 1: But this is a What oils down to is power.
Speaker 1: When people have something that you want, it's crazy. You
Speaker 1: don't know, people don't know what to do with it.
Speaker 1: I mean, this is us, just regular us sitting on
Speaker 1: Koucho regular maybe not regular, not regular, but well, I
Speaker 1: feel like we're down to earth right now, right now, yo,
Speaker 1: catch us in three years this I'm gonna be like,
Speaker 1: I know. But also, we are women. When men have power,
Speaker 1: it is sick.
Speaker 2: Like I would I need men to have supervisors because
Speaker 2: that's how sick they are with the power.
Speaker 1: Word. Where's the Hollywood hr The Academy. There's none. There's none.
Speaker 2: Well no, because Terry Crews, you know, the big black
Speaker 2: Terry Crew said he was at a party and some
Speaker 2: Hollywood producer came and grabbed his dick or squeezed his butt.
Speaker 2: I don't remember which side of his body was, but
Speaker 2: grabbed something. But Terry Crew's always doing something cooner. I
Speaker 2: don't want to say it, but he always started doing something.
Speaker 2: He's doing coon stuff or not. He's still a six
Speaker 2: foot something black man. And a white executive came up
Speaker 2: and just grabbed him and thought it was hilarious and
Speaker 2: walked away. And Terry said he couldn't even say nothing
Speaker 2: because he was like, well, how would it look me
Speaker 2: as a black man putting in some white men in
Speaker 2: the face in the middle of like all these Hollywood elites.
Speaker 2: And it's like, you ain't gona no Jewish lawyer, like
Speaker 2: a jew buo that could like shut this deck.
Speaker 1: Like somebody said an email. Sure he went to somebody.
Speaker 1: I'm sure he went to his people and they were
Speaker 1: like listen, Terry, listen, you know, white chicks, that was
Speaker 1: the last good movie you're in, So like.
Speaker 2: No, your car right, just you know, So they're like listen, Terry,
Speaker 2: do you want to do who wants to be a
Speaker 2: millionaire for a season?
Speaker 1: Or nah, Yes, that's what it is. I mean.
Speaker 2: And the entertainment is so freaking fickle. It's so fickle.
Speaker 2: One minute you're in, the next minute you're out. You
Speaker 2: never know if you're gonna get another.
Speaker 1: Joby Weinstein was in for like forty years, but people
Speaker 1: wanted the end.
Speaker 2: Well yeah, because all the women that are talking now
Speaker 2: are like they he tried, but I didn't, but I
Speaker 2: want to know what women and they let him like
Speaker 2: those are women that I'm like.
Speaker 1: Well what what what thing? Stories? Well, they're quiet because
Speaker 1: it's the stigma is that women are always fucking to
Speaker 1: get to the top. So if they mentioned that, they're like, yeah,
Speaker 1: I was slept with Harvey. They're like, well, because where
Speaker 1: you are, yeah, is your career really valid? So it's
Speaker 1: some men that sleep. They wait to the top too.
Speaker 2: Allegedly, Will Smith got on the casting couch for The
Speaker 2: Fresh Prince.
Speaker 1: Of bel At Are you serious, alleged, Laurie, I don't
Speaker 1: believe that.
Speaker 2: Oh my goodness, Sis, get into it. It's probably all
Speaker 2: over lipstick Alley or whatever the hell y'all are getting
Speaker 2: y'all news from now, Like this is something that like
Speaker 2: people say John Travolta like this, Like these are names
Speaker 2: that like when you When I hear them, I'm like, oh,
Speaker 2: I heard that this person did this to get what
Speaker 2: they got.
Speaker 1: This is something that I hear. Let me, I'm gonna
Speaker 1: throw this out there right now, go ahead me And
Speaker 1: where I am right now at this age, I'm not
Speaker 1: fucking because I didn't fuck so much and I got
Speaker 1: nothing out of it. I'm not confident in my fucking
Speaker 1: and I'm like, oh, I'm a fit help this. So
Speaker 1: I'm not gonna call myself caught out there. But if
Speaker 1: I was twenty four, per se, if I was twenty
Speaker 1: four and I had the opportunity to just like, hey, bang,
Speaker 1: somebody you your career to need no no play my
Speaker 1: chips right to like maybe finagele a situation to make
Speaker 1: them think that, oh maybe I would. Men are dumb.
Speaker 1: Men are They're stupid. That's why I just I just
Speaker 1: feel like women are so powerful and so many outlets
Speaker 1: that if we just came together and put some shit together,
Speaker 1: that's like we could take this stuff over for you.
Speaker 1: But that's not going to happen.
Speaker 2: Because women in general don't tend to stick together because
Speaker 2: white women and this hear me out white women that
Speaker 2: are listening. White women tend to not stand up for
Speaker 2: other women. They stand up for themselves. They speak when
Speaker 2: something affects them specifically, that's what it is. And then
Speaker 2: if a black woman talks, they're gonna be like na, na, no,
Speaker 2: no no, Like Lupita wrote a whole article about something
Speaker 2: and he was like, nah, I don't know.
Speaker 1: And then where are the feminists? Where are they at
Speaker 1: exactly exactly I mean.
Speaker 2: Meanwhile, me as a regular regular black woman, I was
Speaker 2: at a Barnes, Barney's and Nobly a couple of years ago,
Speaker 2: and I was charging my phone because you know, I
Speaker 2: was not in there reading no damn books at the
Speaker 2: Barney's and Nobly, and this like fat white dude walked by,
Speaker 2: looked at me, kept moving and then came back the
Speaker 2: other direction and he comes up to me and he's like, hey,
Speaker 2: I'm a director.
Speaker 1: I'm James Tobeck. This story like this is real, is alleged.
Speaker 1: I'm not trying to get sued. This happened for real.
Speaker 2: He's also it came out that he did a bunch
Speaker 2: of crazy stuff to women too. But he came up
Speaker 2: to me and was like, hey, allegedly I want you
Speaker 2: got a really great look. I'm a director. I just
Speaker 2: directed this movie about Mike Tyson. It's a documentary. Blah
Speaker 2: blah blah. None of that is alleged because he really did.
Speaker 2: And he was like, here's my DVD here, and I
Speaker 2: was like, you just got the DVD just in your knapsack.
Speaker 1: You gotta have it ready. It's like a mixtape, you
Speaker 1: got it in your book. But you're man ready, You're
Speaker 1: my man. You love documentaries.
Speaker 2: So he gives it to me and he's like, I
Speaker 2: feel like I got some things that are about to
Speaker 2: pop off. I feel like you'd be a good fit
Speaker 2: for something that I'm doing. Allegedly, so he's like I
Speaker 2: was like mm hmm okay, and he's like, are you hungry?
Speaker 2: Do you have time to get something to eat? Of
Speaker 2: course I got time food. I might have just ate,
Speaker 2: but I'm still hungry for your food. So we go
Speaker 2: we get something to eat, simple, simple, dimple and he's like, oh,
Speaker 2: you know, he's telling me all about his life. He's
Speaker 2: telling me all these terrible things that he's done, not
Speaker 2: like oh, I be touching women, but like, just he
Speaker 2: seems like a terrible person just the way he's talking
Speaker 2: to me. I'm like, oh, you used to like people
Speaker 2: who are way above your penis grade talking to you
Speaker 2: like women who are too attractive for you are friends
Speaker 2: with you, right.
Speaker 1: That's what That's all they want and need.
Speaker 2: So he's like, oh, you know, when I getting ready
Speaker 2: to cast things, I like to like sit in a
Speaker 2: dark room with the person one on one to get
Speaker 2: to know them. I said, that sounds like something that
Speaker 2: I'm not gonna do, but okay, whatever, I'm gonna let
Speaker 2: you keep talking because they haven't dropped the check yet.
Speaker 2: And he was like, oh, you know something about like
Speaker 2: just revealing your true self.
Speaker 1: Me.
Speaker 2: I'm like, that sound like I gotta take my clothes off.
Speaker 2: He's like, well, if you're not comfortable nude in front
Speaker 2: of me, how will you do a sex scene in
Speaker 2: front of a.
Speaker 1: Crew of people?
Speaker 2: How about I won't be how about we just started talking.
Speaker 2: We already talked about a sex scene. I'm not even
Speaker 2: an actress, No, thank you, what I look like halle Berry?
Speaker 2: So I said, okay, we changed numbers at the end
Speaker 2: of the night because I'm like, I'm gonna be hungry
Speaker 2: on Thursday.
Speaker 1: So we part ways.
Speaker 2: He hits me up and I was like, Hey, I'm
Speaker 2: having lunch, I'm having dinner with Tom Cruise tonight.
Speaker 1: I was like, who, what do I have that I
Speaker 1: can wear? You got a Tom Cruise blouse or a
Speaker 1: Tom Cruise shawl? Right?
Speaker 2: So I'm like, what do I have that I can
Speaker 2: wear for Tom Cruise with a scientology cardian?
Speaker 1: Right?
Speaker 2: And he's like, I'm at dinner with Tom Cruise and
Speaker 2: then when that's done, I'm gonna hit you up so
Speaker 2: you can come to my hotel room so we could
Speaker 2: go over these lines.
Speaker 1: I was like, Nope, not not into it. Not into it.
Speaker 1: We never spoke again, right because I was like, oh,
Speaker 1: I'm not I'm not good enough for Tom Cruise, but
Speaker 1: you're good enough for me. Allegendly, what does he look like?
Speaker 1: Google him?
Speaker 2: James Tobic t o b ac this is what? This
Speaker 2: is what I don't big and white and has glad.
Speaker 2: He looks like Danny's. He looks like Penguin from Batman, but.
Speaker 1: Like tall James Tobic.
Speaker 2: But if you look at what people are alleging about
Speaker 2: him now, he would invite women to his hotel.
Speaker 1: The mother fucking nerve right.
Speaker 2: He would invite women to his hotel room and then
Speaker 2: tell him take their shirts off, and then he would
Speaker 2: just start masturbating in front of them, or when they
Speaker 2: try to leave. He got a lazy eye, he ain't
Speaker 2: got no hairlines and like a tinted sunglass. But he
Speaker 2: would if when they tried to leave, he would rub
Speaker 2: his dick on their leg like a dog until he
Speaker 2: came to.
Speaker 1: He looks like he got skin cancer. I can't this guy, but.
Speaker 2: Can you imagine if his his bit and he's big,
Speaker 2: like his big body on my little tiny virgin body.
Speaker 1: Gross. I mean, this is I'm gonna tell you as
Speaker 1: a woman who has gone up to the room before,
Speaker 1: back to the crib girl room. So you went up
Speaker 1: to the hotel hotel holiday ann. Yes, but obviously this
Speaker 1: is not somebody who was like a director. Who was it?
Speaker 2: Somebody would He was a boom mic operator. He had
Speaker 2: lots of coins. He's a bush driver, he was, he
Speaker 2: had lots of coins.
Speaker 1: I went up because he said he had to talk
Speaker 1: to me, and then he ended up telling me he
Speaker 1: had cancer. Wow wait what yeah? So he like I
Speaker 1: was like, so you didn't bring me up here to
Speaker 1: wait me. He just came to tell me about it.
Speaker 1: It's just like you go, there's so many ways going
Speaker 1: up to the hotel. Can something can happen?
Speaker 2: I am too paranoid to go up to the hotel.
Speaker 1: I went up and he told me, and I ended
Speaker 1: up crying for the rest of the to stay.
Speaker 2: And then while he masturbated. I'm sorry, he's just not masturbating.
Speaker 2: Maybe that's maybe that's how he got He gets off
Speaker 2: on twinman's tears by telling them that he is cancer.
Speaker 1: Right. Did you even know him to be crying? Yeah?
Speaker 1: We had gone out on dates before. He was an older, older,
Speaker 1: older white.
Speaker 2: Man, older older older and I was twenty four at
Speaker 2: the time.
Speaker 1: Okay, so last year and uh yeah, you know at
Speaker 1: the time, I was young, and I was like, shit,
Speaker 1: let me come out with these old rich people. Why not?
Speaker 1: Why let's say how you say you gotta do it
Speaker 1: at least once you have to try. Yes, you never know.
Speaker 1: Did you like him?
Speaker 2: Have you ever had duck pated duck proate?
Speaker 1: I feel like I have. Yeah, Uh poate is like whatever.
Speaker 2: But my question for you is if he had not
Speaker 2: told you he had cancer, if he propositioned you in
Speaker 2: some way, would you have maybe let that gore? Would
Speaker 2: you have considered that? So you went up to the hotel. No,
Speaker 2: I was like, absolutely not. But you went up to
Speaker 2: the hotel.
Speaker 1: I went up there, but I just I couldn't imagine
Speaker 1: me putting any type of skin that's like literally falling
Speaker 1: off into my mouth. I can't. I like my meat
Speaker 1: falling off the bone.
Speaker 2: But I don't like I mean, you know, like the
Speaker 2: meat falling off the boat.
Speaker 1: He was gonna suck the grizzle out. He wasn't gonna
Speaker 1: suck the marrowel. I can't.
Speaker 2: It's just, you know, I hooked up with one guy
Speaker 2: who had money one time, but.
Speaker 1: Oh black, okay. But what he looked like though, he
Speaker 1: was like an older, older black dude bald.
Speaker 2: Okay, but ballpark of the age here for me, says,
Speaker 2: paint the picture.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna say he was twenty years older than me. Okay,
Speaker 1: So he liked fifty. Bitch, you got a lot of
Speaker 1: fucking nerves.
Speaker 2: I'm just saying, like, if you were twenty five, you're
Speaker 2: saying twenty years older than you. I know that means
Speaker 2: at least twenty five. So I assume fifty. Does the
Speaker 2: math not check out because you said he was like.
Speaker 1: Twenty years older than if he was at least thirty
Speaker 1: two years older than you, because you would damn I
Speaker 1: think I was twenty two at the time. Okay, so
Speaker 1: he was sixty, Go ahead, sisters. But he you know,
Speaker 1: he gave me a little money here and there, but
Speaker 1: it wasn't a lot.
Speaker 2: Of money was he's giving you Because you know what,
Speaker 2: I've never had a rich man just give me money.
Speaker 2: I've had a poor man. I had a man, like
Speaker 2: a middle income man. That sounds like a boyfriend, because
Speaker 2: that sounds like.
Speaker 1: That's not funny, that's that's hilarious, just like my diabetes
Speaker 1: doesn't need a a commercial break to gather myself.
Speaker 2: Okay, so you had him giving you money, but you
Speaker 2: didn't have him giving you money.
Speaker 1: He was just giving you money. No, no, no, I
Speaker 1: would like have a story every time, Oh, you know,
Speaker 1: I gotta pay a couple of bills.
Speaker 2: It's like, where are those people that are just giving
Speaker 2: people money like they are, my.
Speaker 1: Dear, They're not here. They are either they're drug dealers.
Speaker 1: I don't want to they a drug deal because I don't
Speaker 1: want to get shot exactly. But those are the ones
Speaker 1: that are really just just frivolous, just dumb, like drop,
Speaker 1: They'll drop ten k on like.
Speaker 2: Luggage, luggage, luggage all at once. I'm gonna get the
Speaker 2: whole sets. I'm gonna get. I'm gonna get the whole
Speaker 2: I'm gonna get the Duffalo.
Speaker 1: Gets the whole set on the same day. Yes, that's
Speaker 1: a family. A family needs a whole set. Pick you
Speaker 1: pick pieces for the set.
Speaker 2: Yeah, but if it's cheaper to purchase the set, then
Speaker 2: just to get individual pieces.
Speaker 1: I don't have a group sale, bitch. It's like, these
Speaker 1: are the set prices.
Speaker 2: But you want all the monograms to match. I don't know,
Speaker 2: since I don't. I don't buy luggage from Lubaitan get
Speaker 2: my luggage from Marshalls or DJ TJ Max got the luggage.
Speaker 1: It's the same luggage to me to me, you get
Speaker 1: to me to me is cute. I don't know about Sumi,
Speaker 1: but I know that I went and I was like,
Speaker 1: is this little.
Speaker 2: Little Nordica suitcase? And I was like, but no, it
Speaker 2: don't even it's not known for making a luggage. The
Speaker 2: wheel's gonna follow.
Speaker 1: All you need to do all you need to know
Speaker 1: is that you need a suitcase. Get a suitcase. Okay,
Speaker 1: you're trying to get her everlasting suitcase and TJ miss ax. Yes,
Speaker 1: I'm trying to get suitcase as we last, me several trips,
Speaker 1: a couple of stamps in the passport.
Speaker 2: Right, I can't just get the suitcase. I'm rolling through
Speaker 2: the airport and the wheel fall off. Now I look
Speaker 2: poor dragging my suitcase through Spain.
Speaker 1: Okay, well back to me. I'm glad that I made
Speaker 1: it through that time period. Okay, let's back. What are
Speaker 1: you doing for the money? People listening want to know?
Speaker 1: Not a lot, No, No. I Rather, the thing is
Speaker 1: that at the time, I'd rather just be with somebody
Speaker 1: who was broke and I like them. No, not me. Sis.
Speaker 1: Times have changed. It's twenty seventeen.
Speaker 2: I'm still waiting on I'm not getting Mona Scott Cardi
Speaker 2: B chicks. I'm not getting Jocelyne chicks. I don't actually
Speaker 2: don't know how big that money is. But I just
Speaker 2: I feel like I I'm nice ish.
Speaker 1: I hate the term goal digger. I hate it. Goals
Speaker 1: I make goal I hate would you rather we dig
Speaker 1: for coal? Like? What is the problem wanting somebody to
Speaker 1: take care of you for the moment of time.
Speaker 2: And then also for the most part, rich people are
Speaker 2: attracted to other rich people.
Speaker 1: Yeah. If a rich person wants to give, you know,
Speaker 1: a twenty something year old Haitian American girl some money
Speaker 1: to pay a bill here or thera, that's his business.
Speaker 2: That's a charity. He didn't he donating the charity. That's
Speaker 2: a tax right off. He's supporting the boys and girls class.
Speaker 2: That's what it is. The girl Scouts.
Speaker 1: Thank you. That's it. That's all that is. I don't know.
Speaker 2: I feel like I know we had the Sugar Daddy
Speaker 2: expert one and she was talking, but her situation was
Speaker 2: a little bit different because the dude was married and
Speaker 2: they were having sex, but he was giving her money.
Speaker 1: But I just want to let you know, most of
Speaker 1: these guys who are just giving their money away are
Speaker 1: most likely married. Well see, and then there's no single
Speaker 1: dude is like, let me just give you my money.
Speaker 1: It's always a guy who's got something to lose. It's like,
Speaker 1: let me just give you my Limity's a risk of everything. Yeah,
Speaker 1: let me put some alimony on the line. Yeah, So,
Speaker 1: like you know, I'm in a point in my life
Speaker 1: where obviously I want to make my own money. Absolutely,
Speaker 1: I definitely want that to happen sooner than later. That's
Speaker 1: the goal.
Speaker 2: I think across the board, Well, I mean maybe that's
Speaker 2: the difference between us and like a gold digger.
Speaker 1: We want to make our own money. But there's gold
Speaker 1: diggers out there that want to make their own money too,
Speaker 1: but they first of all, they need to get an investor.
Speaker 2: You got to get off fun, gotta get it together.
Speaker 2: You got to start from the bottom to be here. Yes, Like,
Speaker 2: I like, what's her name, Milania Trump?
Speaker 1: Wasn't she technically a gold digger?
Speaker 2: And people like to say Milannia Trump allegedly, uh is
Speaker 2: a self made woman? And it's like what They're like, Yeah,
Speaker 2: she has her own business. I'm like, yeah, but who
Speaker 2: gave her the startup money? Because she didn't come here
Speaker 2: with money? She got money now? And what is her business?
Speaker 1: She makes suits? Girl, you ain't got no job, She's
Speaker 1: like tell me. I just feel like, it's what's the
Speaker 1: big deal? What's a big deal with somebody giving you
Speaker 1: money to start something? Right? Give it a little the seed.
Speaker 1: If somebody giving you money and you buying shoes and
Speaker 1: you getting your hair like that's dumb. You're starting to
Speaker 1: sound like Amanda Seals right now. She said, what did
Speaker 1: she say? Oh about the Jordans.
Speaker 2: If you got more than one pair of Nikes, which
Speaker 2: you never used your passport, then you got wrong priorities
Speaker 2: or something like that.
Speaker 1: I agree with that. I agree. How old are you?
Speaker 1: How you thirty three, sir? And you got all them
Speaker 1: shoes and you're telling me the farthest you've gone is Florida.
Speaker 1: That's terrible. Yeah, yeah, y yea yea yea, that's really bad.
Speaker 1: You don't even need a passport for that, and they
Speaker 1: be bringing it.
Speaker 2: Or you see pictures of people like their shoe collection
Speaker 2: and then you like zoom out of the photo and
Speaker 2: the mattress, the mattress and the box springer on the ground,
Speaker 2: and it's like, you ain't got no bed frame? What
Speaker 2: you got spairs of Jordan's. I'm all I totally agree
Speaker 2: with her on that. I mean, and for me as
Speaker 2: a woman who can literally find things for five dollars
Speaker 2: and makes them look like.
Speaker 1: A million dollars million dollars, I don't get it. I
Speaker 1: don't get this sneaker thing.
Speaker 2: I don't get it either in my entire life, owned
Speaker 2: one pair of Jordans and I got them for free.
Speaker 2: Shout out to jump Man, shout doing what they can
Speaker 2: for the community.
Speaker 1: Like, look, look at my.
Speaker 2: New shoes, but I love a free shoe and I'm
Speaker 2: not spending. I don't like paying full retail price for
Speaker 2: things because I know that they're not worth what people
Speaker 2: charge they are. They fall apart, you wash them, the
Speaker 2: letters fall off, like, dude, the tag is.
Speaker 1: Hanging on by a thread. Dude. I was at Zara
Speaker 1: yesterday looking at these little leather wedges brand new.
Speaker 2: I was like, I can see the glue. Like they
Speaker 2: didn't even sew this. This was glued. This soul was
Speaker 2: glu glued on, but they had it had the little
Speaker 2: thread marks. I was like, did they copy and paste
Speaker 2: the thread marks because they are still.
Speaker 1: This since it was a filter, they do a filter
Speaker 1: on that. Dude.
Speaker 2: It was like it was crazy. You could see if
Speaker 2: you look at what you're buying, you see that it's
Speaker 2: not really worth what you're paying.
Speaker 1: It's not worth it. But at the same time, you're
Speaker 1: talking to somebody who's like financially unstable over here, and
Speaker 1: I'll find other ways to be frivolous with my money.
Speaker 1: But what I ain't gonna do is buy me some
Speaker 1: Jordans some one hundred and fifty dollars sneakers. So you're
Speaker 1: not gonna buy some Yezu's shoes, No easy, thank you
Speaker 1: for what some limited editions. These shoes can't fix anything
Speaker 1: in my life. It's not like when I step out
Speaker 1: on these shoes people are like, oh my god, you
Speaker 1: look amazing. Facts.
Speaker 2: Even if they said that, they're looking at your face
Speaker 2: and not your feet, and then that's you.
Speaker 1: No, I don't need that. I don't need no distraction. Exactly,
Speaker 1: look at my face, look at my eyes, roll them
Speaker 1: true though, it's like, what are we doing? I mean,
Speaker 1: I just want to I honestly want this is what
Speaker 1: I would like. Okay, tell me what you would like.
Speaker 1: Tell me what you want from me? More TV shows? Okay,
Speaker 1: you get a little sack, stack it up, reg it up,
Speaker 1: ring it up, give me some money. I also want
Speaker 1: people to send me shit for free to review, like
Speaker 1: mo Re, but stuff.
Speaker 2: Don't send me garbage to review, send me quality produce,
Speaker 2: send me good I mean I got I mean I
Speaker 2: got some good stuff too, but the hair was garbage.
Speaker 1: What other good stuff you got. I've gotten like cool sweaters.
Speaker 2: Remember they sent me that quote unquote cashmere hoodie that
Speaker 2: was rip.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah you did. You're so honest, And that's what
Speaker 1: I love.
Speaker 2: It's like because you can see these reviews on YouTube
Speaker 2: and you're like, that.
Speaker 1: Bitch is lying. Sis. I could see your hairline. It
Speaker 1: looks terrible, like even when they're doing makeup tutorials. I'm like, girl,
Speaker 1: whatever light you got in your apartment, I could tell
Speaker 1: when you step outside you look crazy. Well that's the thing.
Speaker 2: You look crazy, girl, You look crazy when you beg
Speaker 2: that in. But that's the thing though, right, is that
Speaker 2: people will you watch these YouTube videos you do that
Speaker 2: you follow the tutorial I'll be following these little tutorials. Yes,
Speaker 2: since I see you, you can show up two hours later.
Speaker 2: I'm like, okay, girl, what you smoke?
Speaker 1: Yeah, yes, yes, yes.
Speaker 2: But then I get there and I take pictures and
Speaker 2: it looks crazy in the photos. So it looks on
Speaker 2: it though, yeah I guess maybe probably definitely, But like
Speaker 2: I'm saying that, like it still doesn't look as good,
Speaker 2: Like even if the light is off in your bathroom,
Speaker 2: it'll look different when you go outside, right, And that's
Speaker 2: something that people got to take into consideration when they
Speaker 2: follow these little tutorials.
Speaker 1: So anyway, want some free things, you know, I want
Speaker 1: to build portfolio. I want to be doing things. So
Speaker 1: like when we do this podcast, we do live stuff.
Speaker 1: When we out there, people like, yes, that's my girl
Speaker 1: up there doing her thing. You know, Like I want
Speaker 1: us to do big things. I honestly, I listened to
Speaker 1: the podcast over and over and over again. I'm like,
Speaker 1: how come more people don't know about us? This is weird.
Speaker 1: It is weird. It's straight, aren't you laughing? Over and
Speaker 1: over and over again? And sometimes yes, the things are
Speaker 1: just silly, but there's other things that you're like, it's dip,
Speaker 1: it's dipth Well, that's why we had to hit them
Speaker 1: with this one on one. Let y'all know that we
Speaker 1: out here talk about things, but when you come to
Speaker 1: the Unofficial Expert, it's just one hour to laugh and
Speaker 1: chill about some like silly stuff. Yeah.
Speaker 2: I know, you in your car listening, or you on
Speaker 2: the train with your headphones in. Maybe you don't have
Speaker 2: a seat, maybe you do, but you laughing and people
Speaker 2: think you crazy. Yeah when they look at you, just
Speaker 2: show them what you're listening, just.
Speaker 1: Tell them, tell a friend. I know there's a lot
Speaker 1: of holidays coming up. You know, there's got to look
Speaker 1: you gotta have something to play in the background. Put
Speaker 1: the podcast on. I mean, I feel it might not
Speaker 1: be appropriate for your grandmother. They might have a stroke,
Speaker 1: but you know, let people know. But stagg us and stuff.
Speaker 2: Things that you hear you're like, oh my god, that
Speaker 2: reminds me of Sydney. And I mean we're like everybody's
Speaker 2: friends but not really. But like, listen, if you're if
Speaker 2: you are listening to this and you're tagging us in things,
Speaker 2: and you enjoy what you're what you're getting, then like
Speaker 2: or here even more important, if somebody is like, yo,
Speaker 2: I need like a hot, funny black chick for this
Speaker 2: thing that I'm working on that with I don't know,
Speaker 2: Mona Scott wigs not included exactly, b yo, bw be
Speaker 2: your own wig. So like that's I just that's what
Speaker 2: I want. I want us to grow. I want us
Speaker 2: to keep growing where we are growing, are growing. Shout
Speaker 2: out everybody who's listening.
Speaker 1: Thank you, We appreciate thank you for showing up to
Speaker 1: our shows, catching us outside, trying to catch a body
Speaker 1: tapping us like sliding in there. Yes, yes, that is us,
Speaker 1: a raggedy hoe with a CBS wig. That ain't me.
Speaker 2: That ain't mean it is me, but whatever, we don't
Speaker 2: know her. But yeah, just keep continuing to support us.
Speaker 2: We're getting ready to shoot our half hour specials to
Speaker 2: submit to Netflix and or Comedy Central. And that's gonna
Speaker 2: be on Wednesday, November twenty ninth. That's the Wednesday after Thanksgiving.
Speaker 2: So you got time to eat, go shopping for Black Friday.
Speaker 1: Come see us.
Speaker 2: Bring us a gift, bring a plate, Bring bring a
Speaker 2: plate one or a gift to Actually the plate could.
Speaker 1: Be the gift. I'll bring some type ofware, so you
Speaker 1: just you can give me like a little fake plate
Speaker 1: and I'll put the typeaware and I have it. You're
Speaker 1: on a side. Listen. I'll take two styfham plates wrapped
Speaker 1: in foil in a in a tote bad tape it
Speaker 1: up twice.
Speaker 2: Stack the plates. They'll stack them stack so they're sturdy.
Speaker 2: But yeah, the show is gonna be Wednesday of the
Speaker 2: twenty ninth. It's gonna it's gonna be at eight pm,
Speaker 2: doors at seven thirty here in Brooklyn and Park Slope
Speaker 2: at Union Hall. All the info will be on the
Speaker 2: unofficial Expert page on Instagramah and uh, just keep continuing
Speaker 2: to support live comedy. And if there's something specific that
Speaker 2: you want us to talk about, hit us up, or
Speaker 2: a person that you think we should contact, even if
Speaker 2: it's a famous person.
Speaker 1: We know people who know people. They just don't want
Speaker 1: to do the podcast.
Speaker 2: Mean, they scared, but then when then they meet us, they're.
Speaker 1: Like, oh, wait, actually your girls are cool.
Speaker 2: Yes, we are cool. This is all in fun. When
Speaker 2: we are mean, it's kind of like relative mean. It's
Speaker 2: like that cousin that you're like, oh, why she always
Speaker 2: giving me a hard times?
Speaker 1: Because I love you Booth. I mean, I mean, it's subjective,
Speaker 1: it really is.
Speaker 2: I mean, are we really that mean? I don't think so.
Speaker 2: I don't think so. I could be meaner.
Speaker 1: I mean, Marie, we have side one off conversations and
Speaker 1: I'd be like, Marie, you are mean, and I'd be like,
Speaker 1: shut up, Sidney. Yeah, But in conversation when we were
Speaker 1: other people are like, she's so mean.
Speaker 2: No, I think that people are attracted to that though.
Speaker 2: They're like this she mean or she just really honest.
Speaker 1: Well, they want to figure out what they like the
Speaker 1: mystery Sidney. If I was a man, you wouldn't say
Speaker 1: I was mean. You would say I was decisive. You
Speaker 1: would say I was like a strong opinionated in the
Speaker 1: news what I like and knows what I don't like.
Speaker 1: If you're a man, I'm like he gay.
Speaker 2: And yet as a woman, people are like, is Marica.
Speaker 1: Like he's flamboyant as funny? Yes, yes, he's moving his
Speaker 1: neck a lot. Yes. But shout out to everybody who's
Speaker 1: done the podcast recently.
Speaker 2: We really appreciate you. I mean, everybody just makes it
Speaker 2: so much fun.
Speaker 1: I mean, we can honestly talk to each other for
Speaker 1: an hour and it's still be hilarious. But I love
Speaker 1: the guests. They definitely keep up with our fast pace.
Speaker 2: Rudeness, the rudeness, original ruess, rude gel other things. If
Speaker 2: you if there's a specific type of expertise you'd like
Speaker 2: to see, hit us up. You know where to find
Speaker 2: us unofficial expert. Also, what we're going to do is
Speaker 2: start putting bonus episodes up for you guys.
Speaker 1: Little Treats, Little Tricks, Treats, Little Gift, Little Merry Christmas.
Speaker 1: W ho for that? Ass uh? And what that is?
Speaker 2: Gonna be is uh uh. Once a week we'll do
Speaker 2: a bonus episode. Somebody has said to us that when
Speaker 2: the episode ends, we're always laughing at something, and they
Speaker 2: want to know what happens at the end of the episode.
Speaker 2: So you're gonna get like a little bonus, a little
Speaker 2: behind the scenes premium situation.
Speaker 1: Yeah, And it's like, you know, I see y'all going
Speaker 1: to the Beyonce concerts. I see y'all out here paying
Speaker 1: for you know, these yeezies. I see you this four
Speaker 1: four four. Yeah, I see you're out here getting these
Speaker 1: face masks and these threading and stuff. You know, take
Speaker 1: a break from that and then pay for some shit
Speaker 1: of ours, you know. Yeah, Yeah, we worth it? Are
Speaker 1: we not worth We worth it, Marie? We are worth it.
Speaker 1: We I mean, we're entertainers. You gotta start at the
Speaker 1: ground up, you know, you gotta move it. You gotta listen.
Speaker 1: We're asking y'all for the seed money in this episode.
Speaker 2: Right yeah, listen for like, like even if it's a
Speaker 2: dollar a month, just to know that the premium episodes were,
Speaker 2: they're not gonna be They're not gonna be free.
Speaker 1: No, you'll still get these guys. This is uh this
Speaker 1: is an audio GoFundMe right now. Yes, it is little.
Speaker 2: I mean after So, we did the episode with the
Speaker 2: Runaway Bride.
Speaker 1: It was amazing. If you haven't heard it, go right now.
Speaker 1: April storm mess was hilarious.
Speaker 2: April ten businessses so she was super messy, but the
Speaker 2: episode was so good. And what happens a lot of
Speaker 2: times is people come on the podcast tell us all
Speaker 2: their business and then at the very end they're like
Speaker 2: so warmed up that they're like things are falling out.
Speaker 1: It's crazy.
Speaker 2: So the bonus episodes will just be that the continuation
Speaker 2: of the stuff that you heard and you already enjoyed.
Speaker 1: Yeah, and I feel like it's worth it. I feel
Speaker 1: like there's always more to know. We might even get
Speaker 1: it juicier in these little bonus episodes. Some things that
Speaker 1: you're like, oh shit, I wanted to know about that,
Speaker 1: you won't know. We gonna just put a little seat
Speaker 1: at the end line. If you want to find out
Speaker 1: blah blah blah, go to If you want to know more,
Speaker 1: turn to page seventeen. If you want to go home,
Speaker 1: turn the page twelve.
Speaker 2: You know, like the Choose your own Adventure books, Yeah,
Speaker 2: that's what our podcast is anyway. I feel like I've
Speaker 2: said everything that I wanted to say.
Speaker 1: Are you ready for the guests this episode? Come on
Speaker 1: guess tonight.
Speaker 2: We have Jelly and Jam, Sidney's Grocery cat Cats experts.
Speaker 1: Well, Sydney. Let people know listening where they can find you.
Speaker 1: You can catch me outside about people still saying that no, no,
Speaker 1: she got a record deal. Yeah, but then she's also
Speaker 1: crying like an interviews she's having. Yeah, she's like twelve
Speaker 1: for everything about nothing. Put your head on my bosoom.
Speaker 1: You could catch me on Instagram just said BW g
Speaker 1: us T syd BW. Twitter just said NYC j USC
Speaker 1: s y d n y C, and then catch us
Speaker 1: on the Facebook page the Unofficial expert like comment, we
Speaker 1: need to update that, but you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1: We do we can.
Speaker 2: Yeah, we need a in turn, we need an intern
Speaker 2: that's gonna work for free. Oh yeah, will work for love.
Speaker 2: I will, I will, I will listen. You can find
Speaker 2: me on Instagram at rez r e e e z
Speaker 2: y and then you can find me live at Union
Speaker 2: Hall on Wednesday, November twenty ninth, eight.
Speaker 1: Pm doing my half hour.
Speaker 2: You got to catch people before I'm famous before I start, uh,
Speaker 2: sexually assaulting dudes in hotel. Oh my god, I want
Speaker 2: you to do it, and I want you to do
Speaker 2: it to like to like a white man.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, Connor, just put put a whole broomstick. No,
Speaker 1: Oh my god, I have to go. I'm kidding youraf
Speaker 1: the Bonus episode and everything that's gonna happen right after this.
Speaker 1: Bye guys, Bye,