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Speaker 1: Time now for today's Strawberry Letter and listen. If you

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Speaker 1: need advice on relationships, dating, work, sex, parenting, and more.

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Speaker 1: Please submit your Strawberry Letter to Steve HARVEYFM dot com

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Speaker 1: and click submit Strawberry Letter. We could be reading your

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Speaker 1: letter on the air live, just like we're gonna read

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Speaker 1: this one right here, right now. Did you hear that?

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Speaker 1: Bugle love, bugle love, and hold on tight. We got

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Speaker 1: it for you here. It is Strawberry Letter. Oh please,

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Speaker 1: don't even try. His subject his ex wife wants to

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Speaker 1: sleep over. Dear Stephen Shirley. I've been married for two years,

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Speaker 1: and when I met my husband four years ago, he

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Speaker 1: had just gotten divorced and he was in a bitter

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Speaker 1: custody battle with his ex wife. His daughter is very

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Speaker 1: sweet and she loved her dad, but the ex wife

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Speaker 1: is dead set on her not having a relationship with

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Speaker 1: her dad. When we met, he had to limit communication

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Speaker 1: with his ex because she told everybody. He kept calling

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Speaker 1: her to work things out, and he wanted his family back.

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Speaker 1: I never gave it any of my attention, but it

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Speaker 1: really bothered him. Now he only communicates with her by

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Speaker 1: texting so she can't lie on him. They have joint

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Speaker 1: custody and he pays her child's support. She didn't like

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Speaker 1: the amount of child's support. The judge ordered him to pay,

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Speaker 1: so he pays a little more every month. Nothing he's

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Speaker 1: done makes her happy thus far. Meanwhile, we haven't had

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Speaker 1: his daughter's sleep over at our house in two years.

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Speaker 1: I thought maybe if I've befriended his egg that would

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Speaker 1: help things out, but she told me not to ever

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Speaker 1: call her phone again. A few months after that, she

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Speaker 1: texted me to say her behavior was uncalled for and

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Speaker 1: we could be cordial, but that didn't last long. She

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Speaker 1: continued to deny visitation to my husband. We want to

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Speaker 1: take his daughter, who's twelve years old now, to South

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Speaker 1: Carolina with us for spring break. His ex wife said

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Speaker 1: his daughter can't go on a trip with us unless

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Speaker 1: she goes to same thing with week end visits at

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Speaker 1: our house. If the daughter sleeps over, the ex wife

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Speaker 1: has to come too. I don't want this woman sleeping

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Speaker 1: in my house. My husband said it may be the

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Speaker 1: only way for him to enjoy time with his child.

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Speaker 1: He is ready to seek full custody. What would you

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Speaker 1: do in this situation? WHOA I don't know, but I

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Speaker 1: think you know that's a good place to start. To

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Speaker 1: go ahead and seek full custody, go back to the court.

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Speaker 1: I think your husband is in a horrible position because

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Speaker 1: you know, despite all the craziness from his ex wife,

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Speaker 1: he wants to see his baby. Bottom line, he doesn't

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Speaker 1: have many options because of this ugly acting woman. She's evil,

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Speaker 1: she's out of line, and she's obviously a miserable, very

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Speaker 1: bitter person, and she's abusing her power and using her daughter,

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Speaker 1: putting her daughter right in the middle, using her as

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Speaker 1: a pawn, and that's just wrong to do children like that.

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Speaker 1: But on the other hand, you, I think are an angel.

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Speaker 1: I mean you've been over backwards to be accommodating to

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Speaker 1: the woman, and that says you have love for your

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Speaker 1: husband and for his daughter, your stepdaughter. Your husband is

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Speaker 1: the very opposite of a deadbeat dad. Doesn't fit that

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Speaker 1: stereotype at all. He pays more child support than the

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Speaker 1: court ordered. You can't get a lot of dads to

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Speaker 1: pay even the child's even anything, let alone more so,

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Speaker 1: that's good father who wants to be a major part

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Speaker 1: of her life. The thing is, your daughter really is

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Speaker 1: old enough to choose for herself what parents she wants.

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Speaker 1: To be with. She just can't because she's a miner.

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Speaker 1: And I feel sorry in that regard because divorce is

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Speaker 1: so hard on children. I don't even understand why this

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Speaker 1: woman wants to stay in the house. Could it be

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Speaker 1: that she still wants your husband? I would say the

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Speaker 1: answer to that is yes. Does she want to make

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Speaker 1: your lives a living hell because she's so miserable and unhappy?

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Speaker 1: I think that would be a yes too. But you know,

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Speaker 1: you got to think about what's best for the child

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Speaker 1: and right now until he goes to court. Um, you know,

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Speaker 1: I don't know. Could you guys get two hotel rooms?

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Speaker 1: Can you afford that? And? Uh, you know, let the

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Speaker 1: wife stand one and with the child and you and

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Speaker 1: the husband stand the other one. At least she won't

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Speaker 1: be in your house. I don't know. Maybe this will

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Speaker 1: work out until he can get to the court and

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Speaker 1: fix it. At least he can see his baby. Steve,

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Speaker 1: I don't really know what to say this. That are

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Speaker 1: kind of stupid to me. I wouldn't even wrote in

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Speaker 1: about this him. Well you met your husband four years ago.

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Speaker 1: The subject is ex wife wants to sleep over sleep over? Well,

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Speaker 1: whoa So this lady is writing his letter and she's

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Speaker 1: talking about her husband's ex wants to sleep over at

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Speaker 1: their house. Yeah, he got divorced, bitter custody battle. Daughter

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Speaker 1: sweet loves her dad. Ex wife don't want them, have

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Speaker 1: no relationship. They met. They had limited communication with his

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Speaker 1: aunt because she told everybody. He kept calling that work,

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Speaker 1: trying to work stuff out because he wanted his family back.

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Speaker 1: She ain't paid no attention, so now he only commuted

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Speaker 1: by texts, so she came lound it. He paid child support,

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Speaker 1: she don't like the amount he paid more, don't nothing

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Speaker 1: make her happy? Now they ain't had his daughter sleep

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Speaker 1: at their house in two years. And the reason I'm

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Speaker 1: reading this letter get us because I want you to

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Speaker 1: see how some people use children as pawns to get

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Speaker 1: back at the other party for whatever reason. We don't

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Speaker 1: know why they divorced, but obviously whether it was her fault.

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Speaker 1: But it takes two people to get a divorce. Somebody

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Speaker 1: two people. Look, somebody may initiate the wrong, but when

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Speaker 1: you get a divorce, two people did something that wasn't

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Speaker 1: cool where you handle it or something. So it takes

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Speaker 1: two people to get a divorce. So you thought that

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Speaker 1: you should be friend it is crazy, healthful. He as

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Speaker 1: a woman she tried that don't care what her baby think.

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Speaker 1: But you think you're gonna get her to start making

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Speaker 1: sense to you. She don't care nothing about you because

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Speaker 1: she don't care none about her child. When you use

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Speaker 1: a child as a pawn in the relationship, the damage

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Speaker 1: that you think you're doing to the other party, whatever

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Speaker 1: you're doing to another party, multiply that by ten, because

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Speaker 1: that's what's happening with the child. All right, Steve, hold

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Speaker 1: that thought. Okay, we're gonna have part two of your

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Speaker 1: response coming up at twenty three minutes after the hour.

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Speaker 1: Today's Strawberry Letters subject his ex wife wants to sleep over.

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Speaker 1: We'll get back into it right after this. You're listening

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Speaker 1: to show, all right, Steve, Come on, let's recap today's

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Speaker 1: Strawberry Letters subject his wife wants to sleep over? Now,

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Speaker 1: who do that? Who? First of all, let's be real

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Speaker 1: about this. Anybody the ex wife stay, This is this

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Speaker 1: woman's house. Ain't no woman letting your letting her husband's

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Speaker 1: ex wife sleep over because she demands it. Yeah, it

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Speaker 1: would be different if some extenuating circumstances their house burned

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Speaker 1: down and they needed a place to stay for a

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Speaker 1: couple of days. Got that, but she won't let the

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Speaker 1: baby come over the yall's house and for two years

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Speaker 1: and spending night. The daughter loves her daddy. You try

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Speaker 1: to befriend, You try to befriend this crazy woman that

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Speaker 1: don't care nothing about her daughter. So now she said

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Speaker 1: they want to take the daughter, who's twelve years old,

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Speaker 1: to South Carolina with him for spring break. His wife

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Speaker 1: said his daughter can't go on the trip with us

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Speaker 1: unless she go to I'm about to defend to pay

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Speaker 1: for you to come nowhere on His ex wife said

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Speaker 1: his daughter can't go on the trip with us unless

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Speaker 1: she goes to same thing the weekend, visit our house.

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Speaker 1: If the daughter sleeps over, the ex wife has to

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Speaker 1: come to I don't want this woman sleeping in my house.

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Speaker 1: My husband said it may be the only way for

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Speaker 1: him to enjoy time with his child. He's ready to

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Speaker 1: seek full of custody. What do you think of this situation?

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Speaker 1: First of all, sir, you're gonna have to find I

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Speaker 1: know you wanted to see your daughter, but that ex

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Speaker 1: wife demanded to sleep over the house. There's no reason

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Speaker 1: that that should be the case. You've got to get

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Speaker 1: a lawyer and get unsupervised visits. And you've got to

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Speaker 1: get weak in rights to your daughter. Now, I don't

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Speaker 1: know if they're gonna give you full custody, because for

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Speaker 1: a court to take a child away from a mother,

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Speaker 1: you have to be an unfit mom. Crazy don't do

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Speaker 1: is unfit because she's not abusing the daughter. She just

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Speaker 1: abusing the man, which in turn abusing the daughter. Ain't

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Speaker 1: no court fit to do that. But let me tell

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Speaker 1: you why you really can't have this health in your house.

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Speaker 1: Come on, let's just go a couple of things. Let's

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Speaker 1: just start with number one. Sleep over your house. Wake

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Speaker 1: up this crazy health for standing over you with a

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Speaker 1: butcher knife. That's for start. Now you're walking all into kitchen.

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Speaker 1: Her crazy ass in there making sandwiches. This ain't your house.

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Speaker 1: Can't be in here doing this in here she down

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Speaker 1: seat and bought a load of clothes over She downstairs

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Speaker 1: washing a load of clothes and your damn laundry. Matt,

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Speaker 1: don't let this health for in your house. Knocking on

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Speaker 1: the bathroom though you and they're in the bathroom, she

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Speaker 1: knocking on the door. What's taking you so long? Hair out?

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Speaker 1: I need to get in there in your house, even

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Speaker 1: as she rearranging furniture. I don't like the sofa over here.

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Speaker 1: I want it over here, sitting up in here. Snatch

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Speaker 1: the remote out your hand. Make everybody watch forty eight hours.

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Speaker 1: Don't let this crazy health in your house. You go

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Speaker 1: down stairs. She walking around with her braun pants on,

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Speaker 1: talking about what you want, what you want? That walking

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Speaker 1: around the house humming. Gotta feel, gotta feeling, a gotta feeling.

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Speaker 1: Somebody's try to sneak getting my friend be No like that,

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Speaker 1: Oh don't. That's just crazy health in your house, being

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Speaker 1: here lighting candles and stuff. Let's say they all coundle

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Speaker 1: stuff going that kitchen, she and that got two chicken

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Speaker 1: feet in there with a bird beat bird beach. Ye crazy, Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I feel bad look for the thing man. But he

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Speaker 1: has to go to court though, and work out something

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Speaker 1: and get visitation and weekends. Gotta have weekends with your child.

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Speaker 1: They already have joint custody though. I mean, but see

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Speaker 1: if she you, you can enforce the joint custody. She

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Speaker 1: can't make the rules of the joint custody because the

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Speaker 1: father hasn't been ruled unfit, so he has to have

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Speaker 1: a weekends he's paying child custody, I mean child support.

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Speaker 1: He should have rights and a weekend with his daughter.

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Speaker 1: Every other weekend he's without the mama. I have a question,

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Speaker 1: So is it? Is it? Perhaps maybe spring break is

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Speaker 1: her week and she doesn't want to give that week up,

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Speaker 1: and that's why she's demanding to go. No, she didn't

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Speaker 1: say this is not only the spring break. The girl

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Speaker 1: ain't been today house in two years. Yeah, so this

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Speaker 1: is way beyond the spring break. She won't even let

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Speaker 1: the daughter come to the house to see the man. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: because she being funky, because she bitter. Yes. Yeah. And

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Speaker 1: I can't stand when they use the children as pawns

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Speaker 1: in the middle and hurting the child. Yeah, you're this child.

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Speaker 1: She wants to see her dad, and the dad wants

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Speaker 1: to spend time with her. All right for you? All right?

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Speaker 1: Post your comments done. Today's Strubberry's Steve Harvey FM on

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Speaker 1: Instagram and Facebook. Check out the Strawberry Letter podcast on demand,

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Speaker 1: please and coming up at forty six minutes after the hour,

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Speaker 1: we'll have sports Talk with Junior right after this. You're

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Speaker 1: listening to the Steve Harvey Morning Show