WEBVTT - The Importance of Male Role Models 0:00:05.160 --> 0:00:07.360 What's good Family, it's your girl to make a d 0:00:07.520 --> 0:00:11.120 Mallory and it's your boy, my son in general, and 0:00:11.160 --> 0:00:14.120 we are your hosts of street politicians, the place where 0:00:14.120 --> 0:00:18.360 in the streets and politics meet. What's good, my son Lennon, 0:00:18.400 --> 0:00:21.599 how you doing today? I'm blessing honey favor. How are 0:00:21.600 --> 0:00:24.560 you feeling? You know, I know Mother's Day just happened. 0:00:24.560 --> 0:00:26.720 Happy related Mother's Day. Even though I said it on 0:00:26.880 --> 0:00:30.360 Mother's Day, I'm saying it down during the show, thank 0:00:30.400 --> 0:00:33.280 you very much. Mother's Day was actually really really nice. 0:00:33.680 --> 0:00:37.400 I spent uh a lot of time with my own mama, 0:00:37.440 --> 0:00:39.480 and I guess that's really all you can ask for. 0:00:39.880 --> 0:00:42.760 I thought a lot about your mom, you know, on 0:00:43.040 --> 0:00:46.879 Mother's Day. Um My home girl, Patricia Lennon. So I 0:00:46.960 --> 0:00:49.760 know yesterday was probably a tough day for you and 0:00:50.200 --> 0:00:52.559 your family members. Hopefully you had a chance to be 0:00:52.600 --> 0:00:56.920 with your loved ones and to celebrate your mom. You know, 0:00:57.160 --> 0:00:59.520 it was kind of tough started earlier, but I was 0:00:59.560 --> 0:01:03.320 with the baby the whole day, so you know, that 0:01:03.520 --> 0:01:07.679 kind of helped a lot. And I'm playing soccer and 0:01:07.720 --> 0:01:10.479 I was a soccer dad, so yelling it all gain 0:01:10.600 --> 0:01:13.720 with the rests and getting energetic kind of just took 0:01:13.800 --> 0:01:16.880 my mind off it. But it was a period early 0:01:17.000 --> 0:01:20.200 yesterday morning that that was really tough for me, and 0:01:20.240 --> 0:01:21.920 me and my brother were here and my brother stayed 0:01:21.959 --> 0:01:24.600 with me this weekend, and we were just talking about 0:01:24.640 --> 0:01:28.520 my mother's and I posted one of our videos for dancing, 0:01:29.000 --> 0:01:31.240 which we always I love to dance with her and 0:01:31.280 --> 0:01:34.160 she would always laugh because I always would make her dance, 0:01:34.160 --> 0:01:36.720 So that was like our little things. So you know, 0:01:36.959 --> 0:01:39.160 it was tough, but you know, I just pictured her 0:01:39.240 --> 0:01:41.800 dancing in my mind and it got me through it 0:01:41.800 --> 0:01:48.400 a lot better. Yep, Patricia is a legend that lives 0:01:48.480 --> 0:01:53.960 on so UM. So what happened this weekend was pretty 0:01:53.960 --> 0:01:56.360 cool because all of last week I was a little 0:01:57.240 --> 0:01:59.200 I don't know, I want to use the word high strong, 0:01:59.320 --> 0:02:02.040 but that's not really the word, but just on edge 0:02:02.120 --> 0:02:05.640 because I had a real important speech to make UM 0:02:05.920 --> 0:02:10.200 on Saturday where I was the commencement speaker for Virginia 0:02:10.320 --> 0:02:14.799 Union University UM, and I also received an honorary doctorate 0:02:14.800 --> 0:02:18.440 degree UM from the school, and so I was all like, oh, 0:02:18.480 --> 0:02:19.880 first of all, I have it. You know, I like 0:02:20.040 --> 0:02:25.839 my props, this is my degree, my deploy my degree 0:02:26.600 --> 0:02:29.600 creat that's right. Wait a minute, I'm gonna show you 0:02:29.600 --> 0:02:34.000 guys what that was that just fell. This is it, 0:02:34.440 --> 0:02:37.760 and what fell out of it that I didn't even remember. 0:02:38.960 --> 0:02:43.040 I have is a piece of art that was was 0:02:43.120 --> 0:02:47.960 actually created while I was speaking. So there was a 0:02:48.000 --> 0:02:52.880 gentleman who he drew this while I was speaking. So anyway, 0:02:53.120 --> 0:02:55.840 it was a really powerful day. First of all, Virginia 0:02:55.960 --> 0:03:01.880 Union has produced some of the most UM prominent preachers, 0:03:01.919 --> 0:03:07.079 black preachers UH in America. And UM, so the school 0:03:07.760 --> 0:03:12.079 is a it has a real holy spirit about it. UM. 0:03:12.200 --> 0:03:15.600 And so the singing, the choir, everything was so good. 0:03:16.000 --> 0:03:19.359 And then it was my turn to speak, and I UM, 0:03:19.440 --> 0:03:21.480 of course, since we came back from Africa, I think 0:03:21.520 --> 0:03:25.920 I know everything about Africa, UM. And I talked about, 0:03:26.280 --> 0:03:28.680 you know, this idea that we can't forget who we are. 0:03:29.480 --> 0:03:32.600 We cannot forget and we must learn more about our 0:03:32.680 --> 0:03:36.680 lineage UM and understand that we're connected to one point 0:03:36.760 --> 0:03:42.120 twenty six billion people across the world, on a continent 0:03:42.160 --> 0:03:45.960 with fifty four countries, and you know, we're bigger than 0:03:46.040 --> 0:03:48.800 what they try to make us here in this country. 0:03:48.920 --> 0:03:52.000 And you know, I talked about this idea that we're 0:03:52.040 --> 0:03:56.960 not one another's enemies that that was created. When we 0:03:56.960 --> 0:04:03.000 stood in those dungeons, I saw immediately exactly how the Atlantic, 0:04:03.880 --> 0:04:08.720 the trans Atlantic slave trade created the division that we 0:04:08.760 --> 0:04:12.400 deal with that we fight against every single day within 0:04:12.520 --> 0:04:16.040 our own community. I'm not talking about what the Europeans 0:04:16.080 --> 0:04:19.760 is doing the Caucasions and you know. And so basically 0:04:19.800 --> 0:04:23.800 I spent some time really focusing on this idea that 0:04:24.240 --> 0:04:27.160 we're not one another's eat enemies, you know, And being 0:04:27.200 --> 0:04:31.120 in those dungeons is where I really had an opportunity 0:04:31.160 --> 0:04:32.839 to see, like I could feel it in my heart 0:04:33.120 --> 0:04:36.000 that if I was a woman, an African woman, and 0:04:36.080 --> 0:04:40.560 I saw my man or a man, any African man 0:04:41.200 --> 0:04:45.000 passing by me while I was in while I was 0:04:45.240 --> 0:04:50.799 captured and being abused and whatever, no matter how much 0:04:51.640 --> 0:04:55.000 I understand that you can't do anything, there's gonna be 0:04:55.040 --> 0:04:58.120 a level of resentment that that that is inside of me. 0:04:58.480 --> 0:05:01.360 And I'm sure there's a level of shame and frustration 0:05:01.760 --> 0:05:05.400 that built up in the African man. And so that 0:05:05.600 --> 0:05:09.280 is where it started this division. I'm sure They're always 0:05:09.440 --> 0:05:13.560 was tribalism, and there were always some issues between men 0:05:13.560 --> 0:05:17.200 and women and people in general in African culture, and 0:05:17.240 --> 0:05:20.640 in every culture. But in that moment when we were 0:05:20.720 --> 0:05:24.600 in those dungeons, as the Rabbi who took us around 0:05:24.720 --> 0:05:27.960 and Um, Rabbi Cohen, as he showed us you know, 0:05:28.640 --> 0:05:32.240 Cape Coast, he was talking about how all the things 0:05:32.279 --> 0:05:35.880 about us they started they developed that stuff right there, 0:05:36.279 --> 0:05:38.839 that all these things that we have that makes us 0:05:38.920 --> 0:05:41.719 look at one another as our enemy as and and 0:05:41.800 --> 0:05:45.800 all of these differences. And so with that being said, UM, 0:05:45.839 --> 0:05:48.119 I tried to talk about that and and as best 0:05:48.160 --> 0:05:51.400 as possible in my commencement speech. And I also learned 0:05:51.800 --> 0:05:54.359 just a few days before showing up at the school 0:05:54.800 --> 0:06:00.039 that Virginia Union is actually built on top of the 0:06:00.040 --> 0:06:03.760 grounds of a former slave jail. So there was a woman, 0:06:04.520 --> 0:06:07.760 um Mary Lumpkins, who was She was a black woman, 0:06:07.800 --> 0:06:12.039 an African woman, a black woman who was married to 0:06:12.640 --> 0:06:18.799 her slave master, and when he died, she inherited all 0:06:18.839 --> 0:06:23.200 of the land, um, and so she started Virginia Union 0:06:23.760 --> 0:06:27.000 in the basement of the jail. And so, you know, 0:06:27.279 --> 0:06:31.320 my whole point was that everywhere around us there's things 0:06:31.360 --> 0:06:33.760 that would would really beat the life out of us. 0:06:34.040 --> 0:06:36.400 But we have to realize that we've never died. We 0:06:36.520 --> 0:06:40.320 always continue to rise. No matter what our conditions are. 0:06:40.440 --> 0:06:44.279 And so that was the message. And I received honorary doctor, 0:06:44.320 --> 0:06:47.960 which is my second The first was from Wilberforce University, 0:06:48.000 --> 0:06:52.040 which is the third. We wait, that's the third oldest 0:06:52.880 --> 0:06:55.720 HBCU in the nation. So I got a lot to 0:06:55.760 --> 0:07:00.680 say about my list self today going on, congratulations manum, 0:07:01.720 --> 0:07:04.919 you never ceased the amazement. You continue to flourish and 0:07:04.960 --> 0:07:09.000 grow and keep being great. So we appreciate you, you know, 0:07:09.120 --> 0:07:14.080 and just listening to you know you're I just know 0:07:14.160 --> 0:07:17.520 the speech was amazing because I know, I remember how 0:07:17.560 --> 0:07:20.680 we all felt in those slave dungeons and how you 0:07:20.720 --> 0:07:23.720 were very I just wanted to get all the information 0:07:23.760 --> 0:07:26.480 so I know you put that together. Hopefully somebody will 0:07:26.480 --> 0:07:28.840 showed it somewhere and we'll be able to see it. 0:07:28.880 --> 0:07:32.760 But if not, you know, it's it's on the Virginia 0:07:32.880 --> 0:07:37.720 Union YouTube page. But you don't mean I'm never gonna 0:07:38.400 --> 0:07:44.000 you'll never tell us that un your YouTube and watch 0:07:44.040 --> 0:07:46.000 the clip. Somebody's gonna get a clip. We're gonna we're 0:07:46.000 --> 0:07:48.200 gonna have to go put a clip up on that. 0:07:48.520 --> 0:07:53.400 Not me, but but go ahead. And I just wanted 0:07:53.440 --> 0:07:56.120 to give a little a little bit of you know 0:07:56.240 --> 0:07:59.360 this weekend on Friday, I celebrated with my friend as 0:07:59.400 --> 0:08:02.960 he released movie Respect the Jokes has urban you know, 0:08:03.040 --> 0:08:06.160 it's urban thriller, and I'm proud, you know, just knowing 0:08:06.720 --> 0:08:10.320 who Anthony is Tone a k. Pretty Tone is, and 0:08:10.360 --> 0:08:13.080 where he's come from and where he's overcome. We have 0:08:13.160 --> 0:08:16.679 a dope interview on my YouTube channel, you know, starting 0:08:16.680 --> 0:08:19.040 my new series called sit Down with the stand Ups, 0:08:19.360 --> 0:08:23.160 which is basically sitting down conversations with stand up individuals 0:08:23.200 --> 0:08:28.600 who overcame so much adversity, prison, near death experience and 0:08:28.640 --> 0:08:33.439 have evolved into businessmen and successful directors and all types 0:08:33.480 --> 0:08:36.079 of other things. So he's the first person that I interviewed, 0:08:36.360 --> 0:08:39.480 and his interview was compelling and new to me, even 0:08:39.480 --> 0:08:41.920 though I've known him for over twenty pleas years. I 0:08:42.000 --> 0:08:44.520 found out so many things about him that I never knew, 0:08:45.040 --> 0:08:46.959 and um, a lot of people in the streets and 0:08:47.040 --> 0:08:49.520 the industry know him. So please tune into that. Go 0:08:49.600 --> 0:08:52.000 to my YouTube page at my song YouTube, at my 0:08:52.040 --> 0:08:54.720 son and why general watch that. Make sure that you 0:08:54.800 --> 0:08:58.559 stream Respect the Jokes is on all streaming platforms right now. 0:08:58.600 --> 0:09:01.800 Let's support, you know, brothers, that's doing something positive. Man. 0:09:01.800 --> 0:09:04.240 We always talk about the negative and who's doing all 0:09:04.280 --> 0:09:07.600 of the stuff. This is somebody who who changed his 0:09:07.640 --> 0:09:10.160 life around for the positive. So I just wanted to 0:09:10.160 --> 0:09:12.680 give him a shout out. And unless you know about that, 0:09:13.000 --> 0:09:16.560 well you he I mean, we we definitely featured some 0:09:16.720 --> 0:09:21.920 of your interview UM last week, and I want to 0:09:21.960 --> 0:09:25.160 go back and listen to the Old Street Politicians episode. 0:09:25.720 --> 0:09:28.800 You can hear UM a little bit of the interview 0:09:28.880 --> 0:09:32.440 with my son and tone, But in addition to that, 0:09:32.480 --> 0:09:35.720 you should go and share, share, share like like like 0:09:36.800 --> 0:09:45.160 on my son YouTube page and listen to the entire interview. 0:09:45.800 --> 0:09:47.760 There's a lot of stuff happening, and I want to 0:09:47.920 --> 0:09:51.760 help us kind of speed through this next portion of 0:09:51.840 --> 0:09:56.240 the show because we have a guest who's actually already 0:09:57.080 --> 0:09:59.480 on and wanting and eager to come on and talk 0:09:59.520 --> 0:10:02.720 about some of the issues that we're covering today. But 0:10:03.120 --> 0:10:07.800 a lot has been happening with my own family, UM, 0:10:07.800 --> 0:10:10.400 with some of my friends. I. We have a very 0:10:10.400 --> 0:10:13.480 close friend you and I whose son UM has been 0:10:13.520 --> 0:10:18.160 dealing with violence in school. He actually was jumped a 0:10:18.200 --> 0:10:22.760 couple of days ago, and eight boys tried to beat 0:10:22.840 --> 0:10:25.280 up on a kid who's really a good kid. He 0:10:25.800 --> 0:10:28.240 you know, We've tried to do everything we can to 0:10:28.320 --> 0:10:30.199 find out because you know, I'm not one of those 0:10:30.240 --> 0:10:34.160 parents that's like, oh, not my child, No, my child too. 0:10:34.320 --> 0:10:37.960 So I'm trying to understand what exactly has he done wrong? 0:10:38.000 --> 0:10:41.079 And literally no one is able to explain it. Um. 0:10:41.280 --> 0:10:43.560 And you know, it's just a lot. And I see 0:10:43.600 --> 0:10:47.479 a lot happening with black men. There's a mental health crisis, 0:10:47.880 --> 0:10:52.440 there is an anger crisis, there is a just so 0:10:52.480 --> 0:10:56.240 many things, finances, everything is just this a lot, and 0:10:56.760 --> 0:10:59.920 I'm really concerned about what we are going to do, 0:11:00.000 --> 0:11:03.720 you know. And so UM, I want to talk about 0:11:03.760 --> 0:11:06.600 another a news story and two things in particular that 0:11:06.640 --> 0:11:10.360 are different, but it's something to be said about both 0:11:10.400 --> 0:11:14.240 of them. The first story is a brother named Deshaun Carter. 0:11:14.360 --> 0:11:17.400 He was an inmate at Riker's Island and he died 0:11:17.440 --> 0:11:21.360 in custody by suicide. UM. There's been a lot of 0:11:21.559 --> 0:11:24.959 conversation about this because he's the fourth victim this year, 0:11:25.120 --> 0:11:29.640 and incarcerated individual who was known to have mental health issues. 0:11:29.720 --> 0:11:34.080 He had been hospitalized. UM. And there's so many issues 0:11:34.160 --> 0:11:36.400 and it's like you could talk about Wriker's Island to 0:11:36.520 --> 0:11:39.959 jail in New York city as one issue, and that 0:11:40.160 --> 0:11:43.760 is one thing, but it's the conditions of the people, 0:11:44.000 --> 0:11:47.559 and particularly young black men, that we're really trying to 0:11:47.600 --> 0:11:51.800 talk about today. Um. Suicide rates are up for a 0:11:51.800 --> 0:11:55.760 lot of people, and it's not just suicide, it's also murders, death, everything. 0:11:55.880 --> 0:11:59.480 Every time I scroll on my timeline, somebody is dying. 0:12:00.679 --> 0:12:04.679 The phone calls coming through, people are committing people are 0:12:04.760 --> 0:12:07.280 dying by suicide. I have to remind myself not to 0:12:07.320 --> 0:12:11.400 say committing suicide. There is this a lot happening with 0:12:11.520 --> 0:12:16.760 people losing their life, not just violent incidents or folks 0:12:16.800 --> 0:12:19.720 getting locked up, but I'm talking about people actually dying, 0:12:20.160 --> 0:12:25.000 and I'm counting the numbers in my head of black 0:12:25.200 --> 0:12:29.320 men UM that this has been happening too. So it's 0:12:29.360 --> 0:12:34.679 an interesting phenomenon. Then you have something as controversial as 0:12:34.679 --> 0:12:38.520 the conversation around Kevin Samuels, and I don't think we'll 0:12:38.559 --> 0:12:41.080 get a chance to really talk about that right now 0:12:41.120 --> 0:12:43.160 before we bring our guests to them. Hopefully we can 0:12:43.200 --> 0:12:46.840 talk about it later. But you know, I've watched I've 0:12:46.840 --> 0:12:50.520 been watching the division online where there are some people 0:12:50.559 --> 0:12:53.720 who are celebrating ke Kevin Samuels, and there are other 0:12:53.760 --> 0:12:57.320 people who are helified angry um and have said some 0:12:57.360 --> 0:12:59.680 pretty nasty things about him, which I don't agree with 0:13:00.080 --> 0:13:05.240 that particular thing, um, But some of the things that 0:13:05.320 --> 0:13:08.240 Kevin Samuel Will said and the way in which he 0:13:08.320 --> 0:13:11.640 presented himself in the world, I'm not gonna lie that. 0:13:11.679 --> 0:13:14.520 When I see some of the brothers that I respect 0:13:14.640 --> 0:13:18.920 celebrating him, it hurts me because I know what his 0:13:19.040 --> 0:13:22.760 words did to some of us as women, and how 0:13:22.840 --> 0:13:27.360 demeaning it was to us and how we felt um. 0:13:27.400 --> 0:13:32.160 And so I see why there are women. I had 0:13:32.160 --> 0:13:37.080 a friend send me a clip of Kevin Samuel Will 0:13:37.200 --> 0:13:39.640 saying something that I thought was crazy because I don't 0:13:39.679 --> 0:13:42.199 listen to him, but I saw some do. She sent 0:13:42.280 --> 0:13:46.440 me that. In addition was the like that I could 0:13:46.480 --> 0:13:49.240 see of a person that she and I both love 0:13:49.280 --> 0:13:53.440 and respect. And she said to me, you see, this 0:13:53.520 --> 0:13:55.920 is why I can't This is why I can't funk 0:13:55.960 --> 0:13:58.720 with us, right, which really what she meant was, this 0:13:58.760 --> 0:14:01.800 is why I can't funk with our brothers. And there's 0:14:02.000 --> 0:14:04.760 there's a and and and and I'm thinking the mental 0:14:04.800 --> 0:14:08.880 health crisis, the challenges we're facing. We're losing so many 0:14:08.920 --> 0:14:12.240 of our young black men, and then there are Black 0:14:12.280 --> 0:14:16.080 women who are really really building up a level of 0:14:16.200 --> 0:14:19.480 disdain and anger with our men, and there's such a 0:14:19.520 --> 0:14:22.400 big disconnect that I feel like we're in a place 0:14:22.400 --> 0:14:26.000 where we really got to do something about it. Well, 0:14:26.120 --> 0:14:29.280 you know, I want to give a little pushback to that, 0:14:29.400 --> 0:14:33.040 because I definitely understand that there are definitely things that 0:14:33.160 --> 0:14:35.280 Kevin san You said and I was like, that's the 0:14:35.280 --> 0:14:38.160 stupid of ship you could have said, right, But then 0:14:38.200 --> 0:14:40.160 there were definitely things that he said that when he 0:14:40.200 --> 0:14:43.240 were a hundreds sent on point as from perspective as 0:14:43.240 --> 0:14:46.760 a man. Right, So I look at that as there 0:14:46.760 --> 0:14:48.880 are a lot of women that I respect that women 0:14:48.960 --> 0:14:52.400 have that follow women that have said things about men 0:14:52.840 --> 0:14:54.800 that I'd be like, how do you even listen to 0:14:54.800 --> 0:14:57.360 ship like that? How do you think that's okay? And 0:14:57.440 --> 0:14:59.720 women to be like, yeah, that's right, and they're going 0:14:59.760 --> 0:15:02.360 int page and be like that's right, and they'll celebrate 0:15:02.360 --> 0:15:07.080 women that I think so so much male bashing that 0:15:07.160 --> 0:15:09.240 it doesn't even make sense that you would ever say 0:15:09.280 --> 0:15:11.840 anything about them. Right. And then when we think about that, 0:15:12.240 --> 0:15:15.680 we look at farricon, right, we look at how we 0:15:15.720 --> 0:15:20.040 want to be able to say, you know, honorable minister 0:15:20.280 --> 0:15:23.880 Lewis Farrakon. How we can look and say Farrakhan has 0:15:23.880 --> 0:15:26.760 done this for the community, he said these things, he's empowered, 0:15:26.840 --> 0:15:29.240 he's done these things. But these things right here, we 0:15:29.280 --> 0:15:32.240 just don't agree with you. I don't agree with everything 0:15:32.280 --> 0:15:36.000 that anybody says, right, but there are things that people 0:15:36.120 --> 0:15:39.520 say that are correct. So we have to we have 0:15:39.600 --> 0:15:42.320 to be able, right, We have to be able to 0:15:42.360 --> 0:15:46.600 be consistent. Right. We can't be inconsistent and we it's 0:15:46.680 --> 0:15:48.560 okay for us to like some of the stuff that 0:15:48.640 --> 0:15:51.840 somebody says, but we can't like none of the stuff 0:15:51.840 --> 0:15:55.520 that somebody else says because it doesn't fit our narrative. Right. 0:15:55.560 --> 0:15:57.840 I have to be able to respect that women are 0:15:57.840 --> 0:16:00.800 gonna like things that some women say that that I 0:16:00.840 --> 0:16:05.520 think a completely bashed meals that have absolutely hate black men, 0:16:05.680 --> 0:16:07.640 and and and I go on pages and I see 0:16:07.920 --> 0:16:10.320 likes from women that I loved every day on the 0:16:10.560 --> 0:16:13.280 pages of women that I think hate black men. Right, 0:16:13.320 --> 0:16:16.680 and then so I have to respect that. I don't 0:16:16.680 --> 0:16:20.120 disagree with you, but I think that where the challenge 0:16:20.200 --> 0:16:24.200 comes in. I know some black women right that have 0:16:24.400 --> 0:16:28.160 said things that really triggered and upset black men. They 0:16:28.160 --> 0:16:32.520 didn't make their whole career demeaning black men. This makes 0:16:33.480 --> 0:16:38.800 this man's his portfolio. That's the poor photo that you see. 0:16:39.040 --> 0:16:42.080 I can I can give you videos where he attacked 0:16:42.120 --> 0:16:44.680 black men. I'm not I'm not talking about and I'm 0:16:44.720 --> 0:16:48.320 saying that. What I'm saying is whether he was attacking 0:16:48.400 --> 0:16:51.320 black men or black women. I don't think that it 0:16:51.440 --> 0:16:54.600 was helpful to do either, right. I think there is 0:16:54.640 --> 0:16:57.720 a way. I think there is a way that you 0:16:57.840 --> 0:17:03.040 can communicate with someone to help them understand things without 0:17:03.120 --> 0:17:06.439 calling them fat and saying that at thirty five you 0:17:06.480 --> 0:17:10.679 are leftovers. There are certain words and then and I 0:17:10.680 --> 0:17:13.000 could go on, I could pull out a list, and 0:17:13.040 --> 0:17:15.200 I promise you that some of these black women you 0:17:15.280 --> 0:17:17.480 talk about, if you tell me you know who they are, 0:17:17.560 --> 0:17:19.960 I know some of them that have said some things 0:17:19.960 --> 0:17:22.800 that really triggered them, triggered black men. But I will 0:17:22.840 --> 0:17:25.760 tell you that I do not know of them using 0:17:25.880 --> 0:17:31.720 certain language, potent language that is extremely demeaning. Kevin Samuels 0:17:31.840 --> 0:17:35.480 was making a living off of trying to be as 0:17:35.720 --> 0:17:39.960 nasty as possible to to say it in a way 0:17:40.200 --> 0:17:43.640 that really impacts and hurts you. It's okay to say 0:17:43.720 --> 0:17:45.960 since you gotta be in shape. If you're gonna be 0:17:46.000 --> 0:17:47.959 with a certain kind of man, you need to be 0:17:48.000 --> 0:17:50.600 in shape. You gotta get yourself together because you need 0:17:50.640 --> 0:17:52.879 to you know, first of all, be healthy. That you 0:17:52.920 --> 0:17:55.679 can speak like that. But when you start using words 0:17:55.720 --> 0:18:00.080 like fat and unattractive and and nobody wants you. You 0:18:00.720 --> 0:18:03.920 that to me to make a living off of speaking 0:18:03.960 --> 0:18:07.440 to people like that, it's not helpful. It actually breaks 0:18:07.560 --> 0:18:10.240 us down more than we already are. And I don't 0:18:10.280 --> 0:18:13.400 support any black woman that does that. I don't support 0:18:13.400 --> 0:18:16.320 any black man that does that. I think anybody that 0:18:16.400 --> 0:18:20.159 does that is disgusting, quite frankly. And so that's what 0:18:20.240 --> 0:18:22.800 I'm saying, and I'm not trying and I'm not saying 0:18:22.840 --> 0:18:24.919 that he couldn't see he didn't say some things that 0:18:24.960 --> 0:18:27.320 are right, And I don't put him in Minister Aaricon 0:18:27.400 --> 0:18:30.720 in the same position, because while Minister Faricon has said 0:18:30.800 --> 0:18:33.160 some things that I don't agree with, he has spent 0:18:33.320 --> 0:18:37.600 his life building us up, not tearing us down. This 0:18:37.640 --> 0:18:40.320 man was doing the opposite. But I don't I don't 0:18:40.359 --> 0:18:42.840 agree with that because you you have you have women 0:18:43.200 --> 0:18:47.879 right who have taken who followed Kevin Samuels and then 0:18:47.960 --> 0:18:51.000 when you say that the value wasn't shot, So what 0:18:51.119 --> 0:18:53.320 are we talking about? Listen to what I'm saying. I'm 0:18:53.320 --> 0:18:56.760 not saying. I'm not talking about an opinion about something. 0:18:56.800 --> 0:18:59.440 I'm talking about if I'm if a woman can listen 0:18:59.480 --> 0:19:03.080 to Kevin's in and she can find a benefit in 0:19:03.160 --> 0:19:06.479 benefiting herself and saying what he said made me a 0:19:06.520 --> 0:19:09.720 better person, It made me reflect on myself, it made 0:19:09.760 --> 0:19:13.600 me do better. Right, And let's let's table this and 0:19:13.640 --> 0:19:16.359 go back and talk about it because we both have 0:19:16.480 --> 0:19:19.080 so much to say. So let's put our guests through 0:19:19.320 --> 0:19:26.439 on this issue of dealing with black men. So I'm so, so, 0:19:26.440 --> 0:19:31.479 so so excited that today we have with us a gurgle, 0:19:31.920 --> 0:19:36.720 a dude from from Brooklyn. That's our brother. We have 0:19:36.800 --> 0:19:39.800 a joke on this show that it's all of our friends, 0:19:40.200 --> 0:19:43.840 because we have so many friends doing so many impactful things. 0:19:44.280 --> 0:19:46.399 UM and Cavane, We're so happy to have you on 0:19:46.480 --> 0:19:51.359 Street Politicians today. Let me give you your proper acknowledgements. 0:19:51.480 --> 0:19:54.879 You are from Brooklyn, New York. You're a community leader, 0:19:55.000 --> 0:19:59.480 not just an organizer, but a leader. You are CEO 0:19:59.640 --> 0:20:05.720 of Community Capacity Development UM, which is your organization that 0:20:05.760 --> 0:20:09.639 does justice and healing work um for black folks and 0:20:09.680 --> 0:20:12.200 other people of color in our communities who are dealing 0:20:12.240 --> 0:20:15.000 with serious trauma. You also are one of the members 0:20:15.080 --> 0:20:18.560 of the Crisis Management Team and a leading voice in 0:20:18.720 --> 0:20:21.720 helping to be you know, strategic in terms of the 0:20:21.800 --> 0:20:24.760 work that's happening with anti violence groups around New York. 0:20:24.800 --> 0:20:28.440 So thanks for having for allowing us to have you 0:20:28.880 --> 0:20:35.440 today on Street Politicians, The Privilege and Big Mice Without Groske. Listen, Man, 0:20:35.520 --> 0:20:37.680 you know how it is, Man, I do it to me. 0:20:37.800 --> 0:20:40.639 It tells me she's the boss here. You know. She 0:20:40.680 --> 0:20:42.440 woke me up and said, Kabin gonna be on the 0:20:42.480 --> 0:20:44.439 show to this all right, Well, I got one of 0:20:44.440 --> 0:20:46.320 my brothers here so we could both take a little 0:20:46.320 --> 0:20:49.880 bit of this abuse to the Absolutely absolutely listen. It's 0:20:49.920 --> 0:20:53.399 a privilege in our honor. I really respect you know, 0:20:53.520 --> 0:20:56.120 the dialogue and the platform that you have created here 0:20:56.119 --> 0:20:59.640 in other spaces. I know we're gonna talk about male 0:20:59.760 --> 0:21:03.199 fee mail, brothers and sisters and how we communicate or 0:21:03.240 --> 0:21:06.879 don't communicate properly, but I just want to say it's refreshing. 0:21:07.000 --> 0:21:08.919 Something that we said kind of in our intros in 0:21:08.960 --> 0:21:12.760 our great room, was that YouTube you, brother and sister, 0:21:12.880 --> 0:21:15.600 y'all have a dialogue, and it's not always in unison. 0:21:16.080 --> 0:21:18.680 I think that's the most healthy, that's the dopest thing 0:21:18.760 --> 0:21:21.080 that could be happening right now. It's not always about 0:21:21.080 --> 0:21:24.720 a grind. Dialogue is a two step process where there's 0:21:24.800 --> 0:21:28.879 reflection and then there's action. Right So the fact that 0:21:28.920 --> 0:21:33.320 we have challenging discourse that puts us out of our 0:21:33.359 --> 0:21:38.120 comfort zones, that's fundamentally important in these moments. That's so 0:21:38.160 --> 0:21:40.920 important in these moments because we don't need the yes 0:21:40.960 --> 0:21:44.240 men approach. There's a history of trauma, there's a history 0:21:44.280 --> 0:21:48.959 of intergenerational intentional disconnect and so we're we're dealing with 0:21:49.040 --> 0:21:53.199 all of that compiled and exacerbated through pandemics, through gun violence, 0:21:53.240 --> 0:21:56.400 and all the different ways in which we address community issues. 0:21:57.119 --> 0:21:59.000 The bottom line is there has to be some out 0:21:59.040 --> 0:22:01.639 the comfort zone, comme So thank you for having me 0:22:01.720 --> 0:22:05.760 here amongst the dialogue and the leadership. So we were 0:22:05.840 --> 0:22:10.040 just in this debate before you came on Cape Baine, 0:22:10.119 --> 0:22:12.679 which we had the table. We're gonna get back to 0:22:12.760 --> 0:22:17.160 it later when we were talking about um, specifically about 0:22:17.240 --> 0:22:21.760 Kevin Samuel's who just recently died. This is a man 0:22:21.840 --> 0:22:22.959 that I don't know if you know him or not. 0:22:23.000 --> 0:22:26.320 Some people do, some people don't. But he became a 0:22:26.480 --> 0:22:32.159 controversial figure on social media. UM, and you know a 0:22:32.160 --> 0:22:33.840 lot of his commentary which we don't have to get 0:22:33.880 --> 0:22:39.000 into today. UM, there's a split feeling within our community 0:22:39.040 --> 0:22:42.560 about whether it was helpful or harmful. UM. A lot 0:22:42.600 --> 0:22:46.040 of times he used language that I thought was was 0:22:46.040 --> 0:22:49.160 was painful for black women to hear. And there are 0:22:49.200 --> 0:22:53.680 some people who say, well, you know, sometimes it's tough 0:22:53.760 --> 0:22:55.959 love and it might not feel so good, but we 0:22:56.000 --> 0:22:59.159 have to have those conversations. The reason why this is 0:22:59.200 --> 0:23:03.960 important is because what I know is happening, which always 0:23:04.000 --> 0:23:07.800 happens with us, is this riff that starts between women 0:23:07.800 --> 0:23:11.199 and men, black men, blended black men and women, and 0:23:11.240 --> 0:23:13.800 we start arguing and going back and forth. And I 0:23:13.840 --> 0:23:17.520 think it's a dangerous time for us to find ourselves 0:23:17.560 --> 0:23:20.960 with any more division because there's so much of it, 0:23:21.320 --> 0:23:24.679 and there's so much pain within our communities that in 0:23:24.680 --> 0:23:27.440 a lot of ways, I feel like all of it, 0:23:27.840 --> 0:23:31.240 the lack of our unity and togetherness is why we're 0:23:31.320 --> 0:23:34.640 losing so many of our young people, and particularly young 0:23:34.720 --> 0:23:38.040 black men, because we're not even able to settle ourselves 0:23:38.040 --> 0:23:40.760 to get focused on how we have to work together 0:23:41.600 --> 0:23:45.160 UM in order to really try to impact young men. 0:23:45.240 --> 0:23:48.840 We just talked about this young guy or this man, 0:23:49.000 --> 0:23:53.600 Deshaun Carter, who was UM an incarcerated person at Rikers 0:23:53.680 --> 0:23:58.080 Island who died by suicide. He had mental health issues, 0:23:58.680 --> 0:24:01.720 and the list goes on. And in fact, over the weekend, 0:24:01.760 --> 0:24:04.919 I was with the state's attorney and she and I 0:24:04.960 --> 0:24:06.920 were talking and I came. I came back and I'm, 0:24:07.160 --> 0:24:09.120 you know, basically, which is what I do to my son, 0:24:09.240 --> 0:24:12.160 poor my son. I just, you know, I beat up 0:24:12.160 --> 0:24:14.480 on my brother so much, but I just have to 0:24:14.520 --> 0:24:17.800 place my frustration somewhere and he takes it. God, bless you, 0:24:17.880 --> 0:24:23.000 my son, bless you. So I came back and I 0:24:23.080 --> 0:24:25.960 and I had four For three days. He and I 0:24:26.000 --> 0:24:30.119 have been in heated dialogue, most of it agreeing, but 0:24:30.280 --> 0:24:35.720 definitely some contentious places about black men and what we're 0:24:35.720 --> 0:24:38.200 gonna do right, especially for young black men, because I've 0:24:38.200 --> 0:24:40.520 got a twenty three year old and some things that 0:24:40.600 --> 0:24:44.080 he does and says, it's it makes me. I'm I'm 0:24:44.080 --> 0:24:47.160 not always happy, right, And so we were going back 0:24:47.200 --> 0:24:50.960 and forth about it, and when I was talking to her. 0:24:51.080 --> 0:24:53.159 She said this and not let you guys take it 0:24:53.160 --> 0:24:56.000 from here, because I'm much more interested in your conversation, 0:24:56.720 --> 0:25:01.399 she said, you know, uh she She started off by saying, 0:25:01.400 --> 0:25:04.960 the elderly women in the room are very concerned for 0:25:05.000 --> 0:25:09.479 their lives, and she therefore is dealing with more of 0:25:09.720 --> 0:25:15.399 us contacting her older women contacting her about, um, you know, 0:25:15.480 --> 0:25:18.719 locking up kids in their community because they're afraid. And 0:25:18.760 --> 0:25:21.840 I get it when when kids are knocking you over thehead, 0:25:21.880 --> 0:25:25.520 people getting their bones broke, they purses stolen. She said. 0:25:25.560 --> 0:25:29.840 The sweet spot is between fourteen and seventeen years old, 0:25:30.200 --> 0:25:35.120 and they're in the street, terrorizing elderly people. She said, 0:25:35.359 --> 0:25:38.040 But I know I cannot lock them all up, and 0:25:38.080 --> 0:25:41.359 I have programs. But what this is an important piece, 0:25:41.400 --> 0:25:45.440 she said. If I keep them inside, I can. If 0:25:45.480 --> 0:25:49.240 I keep them detained, we can influence them by forcing 0:25:49.280 --> 0:25:52.199 them to go to programs and doing other things. But 0:25:52.280 --> 0:25:54.720 when I turned them back to their parents and give 0:25:54.760 --> 0:25:56.480 them a schedule of where they're supposed to be and 0:25:56.480 --> 0:25:59.280 what they're supposed to do, they're not often showing up. 0:25:59.640 --> 0:26:02.880 And that what she found while she sat and where 0:26:02.880 --> 0:26:05.240 she sits in the courtroom. She said, most of the 0:26:05.320 --> 0:26:10.280 time of the time it is a mother, a grandmother, 0:26:10.640 --> 0:26:14.199 and maybe a home girl. And then in other situations 0:26:14.400 --> 0:26:18.960 it's probably just a mother. That is almost never a 0:26:19.080 --> 0:26:23.520 father or a black male, the teacher or somebody present 0:26:23.680 --> 0:26:27.520 for these boys who have done something life changing where 0:26:27.520 --> 0:26:29.600 they may spend the rest of their lives in prison. 0:26:30.080 --> 0:26:32.360 So I said, no, we gotta we have to talk 0:26:32.400 --> 0:26:34.879 about this more. We know the issue is there, but 0:26:35.119 --> 0:26:37.880 something more has to be done. And when we're fighting 0:26:37.920 --> 0:26:41.800 each other, how do we focus? So you guys, that's 0:26:41.840 --> 0:26:44.879 my frame. Let's take it and kind of chop it 0:26:44.960 --> 0:26:46.719 up and try to see what are some of the 0:26:46.760 --> 0:26:48.960 things we need to be doing. You know, what I 0:26:49.040 --> 0:26:51.720 want to say is that you know, I also had 0:26:51.760 --> 0:26:56.520 a panel conversation this weekend with UM. The d A. 0:26:56.800 --> 0:27:00.240 Dr cl Clark came to this Boys to Me ends 0:27:00.920 --> 0:27:04.840 UM conference that we had in the Bronx orchestrated by 0:27:05.000 --> 0:27:08.320 UM former council member Andy King, who's done a lot 0:27:08.320 --> 0:27:11.200 of work with the young boys in the communities, and 0:27:11.240 --> 0:27:13.480 she was talking. She's pretty much said the same thing, 0:27:13.600 --> 0:27:16.680 but she she she took it from fourteen to thirty 0:27:16.960 --> 0:27:18.880 and said that there are so many black men are 0:27:18.880 --> 0:27:23.360 coming to her court, and and she she doesn't want 0:27:23.359 --> 0:27:25.000 to lock them up, like she doesn't want to just 0:27:25.040 --> 0:27:26.840 be the person lock them up, but she she has 0:27:26.880 --> 0:27:29.840 to be the person to make sure the streets are safe. 0:27:29.920 --> 0:27:32.639 She's not gonna let people out here that are killing people. 0:27:32.720 --> 0:27:35.840 And you know, and what I started to realize is 0:27:35.880 --> 0:27:42.360 that there's so much trauma, right, And there's this thing 0:27:42.400 --> 0:27:47.800 where our culture has gravitated and morphed into something that 0:27:48.760 --> 0:27:58.600 respects and advocates for and actually perpetuates and markets negativity. Right. 0:27:58.640 --> 0:28:00.560 And I was having this conversation and they were talking 0:28:00.560 --> 0:28:03.320 about drill music and talking about all these things, and 0:28:03.359 --> 0:28:07.479 I was like, if we are not celebrating positivity, right, 0:28:07.480 --> 0:28:10.600 if we're not celebrating growth, and we're not celebrating the 0:28:10.680 --> 0:28:13.280 positive things, that we don't have any structures that are 0:28:13.400 --> 0:28:16.639 visibly seeing because what we can't see, we can't be right. 0:28:16.640 --> 0:28:19.320 And if we're not seeing people being celebrated for doing 0:28:19.320 --> 0:28:22.679 positive things, and we're not seeing people being elevated for 0:28:22.960 --> 0:28:25.160 doing the positive things, and the only thing we see 0:28:25.200 --> 0:28:28.760 being celebrated as negativity, how do you expect us as 0:28:28.840 --> 0:28:31.960 young man? Because is there there's an innate nature in 0:28:31.960 --> 0:28:34.720 a man to be powerful. Right. That's why sports, when 0:28:34.760 --> 0:28:38.240 you look mostly male dominated sports is about the competition, 0:28:38.360 --> 0:28:41.840 is about overcoming. It's about being number one. You you're 0:28:41.840 --> 0:28:44.680 going against an adversary. Everybody is screaming, this is the 0:28:44.720 --> 0:28:47.040 innate nature of a man. We want to be able 0:28:47.080 --> 0:28:49.040 to compete. We want to be successful. We want to 0:28:49.040 --> 0:28:52.200 be seen as successful, we want to be celebrated. So 0:28:52.320 --> 0:28:55.959 when the positive things that we're talking about, the anti violence, 0:28:55.960 --> 0:28:59.000 that nonviolence, all these things are seeing are shunned and 0:28:59.360 --> 0:29:02.280 seeing that so off and not seeing as powerful, how 0:29:02.280 --> 0:29:07.160 do we not seeing right and not seeing period? How 0:29:07.160 --> 0:29:10.920 do we expect these young boys to gravitate to those things? 0:29:11.120 --> 0:29:14.080 Where is the incentive to be that type of individual, 0:29:14.240 --> 0:29:17.040 to be the stand up, the person who's doing the 0:29:17.080 --> 0:29:20.480 positive things. Where is the incentive We have to start incentivizer. 0:29:20.560 --> 0:29:24.080 We can't sit back and always criticize said, oh that's 0:29:24.120 --> 0:29:27.200 negative or they're doing the wrong thing. We don't have 0:29:27.360 --> 0:29:30.360 the positive rappers. When I started doing positive rapping hip hop, 0:29:30.560 --> 0:29:32.960 people start making fun of me. Nobody wants to hear 0:29:33.000 --> 0:29:36.040 that you're going to this. You know, there's some holy 0:29:36.120 --> 0:29:39.160 other down and you're preaching. Now, Malcolm X and Mom, 0:29:39.240 --> 0:29:42.600 Luther King, nobody was advocating for that. We're not getting 0:29:42.600 --> 0:29:45.440 the same platforms that the drill rappers. Again, we're not 0:29:45.480 --> 0:29:48.040 getting the same respect that you know, the people that 0:29:48.040 --> 0:29:50.960 are talking about destroying and killing everybody is. So how 0:29:51.040 --> 0:29:53.960 do I, as an individual look at a young boy 0:29:54.000 --> 0:29:57.000 who wants to be successful, who wants to be respected, 0:29:57.040 --> 0:30:00.000 who's looking for this power and his fame tell him 0:30:00.080 --> 0:30:02.640 to do something that the world is telling him is 0:30:02.640 --> 0:30:05.680 not gonna be celebrated. If I could add on, so, 0:30:06.560 --> 0:30:10.280 what you're talking about is identity, that's the umbrella, but 0:30:10.360 --> 0:30:13.520 it really breaks down to understanding the six fundament mental 0:30:13.800 --> 0:30:16.840 or universal human needs. So food, clothing, and shelter. Let's 0:30:16.840 --> 0:30:19.240 put that to the side. We know without that everything 0:30:19.280 --> 0:30:21.440 is off the table. Now let's go through those needs. 0:30:21.440 --> 0:30:24.600 Security safety. When I was fifteen years old in front 0:30:24.640 --> 0:30:27.920 of a judge facing facing fifteen years in prison, it 0:30:27.960 --> 0:30:30.520 was because I didn't carry one. I carry two firearms 0:30:30.880 --> 0:30:34.680 to feel to meet that need to feel safe for security. Second, 0:30:34.760 --> 0:30:37.640 human needs spontaneity. It's like the flip side of that coin. 0:30:38.280 --> 0:30:40.800 So as much as uh we've been in, let's think 0:30:40.800 --> 0:30:43.680 about a stable relationship you had right there's a level 0:30:43.720 --> 0:30:45.720 of stability. You must call it this time, you must 0:30:45.760 --> 0:30:47.920 checking at that time, you must be at this location. 0:30:48.160 --> 0:30:52.520 But also there's a level of risk or spontaneity. You 0:30:52.600 --> 0:30:55.160 gotta switch up to tempo. Any relationship you have for 0:30:55.320 --> 0:30:58.880 duration has a level of stability and the level of spontaneity. 0:30:58.960 --> 0:31:01.520 These are human needs. The third of the six human 0:31:01.560 --> 0:31:04.280 needs is acknowledgement. That's what you're talking about, mice. When 0:31:04.280 --> 0:31:07.120 you say, when I shoot a basketball into a hoop, 0:31:07.440 --> 0:31:10.040 the whole world sees. You can't deny me that. When 0:31:10.080 --> 0:31:12.640 I shot a gun as a young man in downtown Brooklyn, 0:31:13.360 --> 0:31:15.960 I shot out of fear. I was in the controversial situation. 0:31:15.960 --> 0:31:17.480 I let it guard. I turned my head like this, 0:31:17.760 --> 0:31:20.000 and I ran. I ran faster than the bullet. But 0:31:20.080 --> 0:31:22.920 what the hood did. They said, Cabine is crazy, he's 0:31:22.920 --> 0:31:25.160 a killer. He's out here, shoot the mac tent. They said, 0:31:25.160 --> 0:31:27.640 I reloaded and let the police. I didn't do nothing 0:31:27.640 --> 0:31:30.360 that right. I did it and I ran away. But 0:31:30.440 --> 0:31:33.640 the point is people acknowledge that behavior because it meant 0:31:33.720 --> 0:31:37.479 that need for significance. Our next need loving connection. Sometimes 0:31:37.560 --> 0:31:41.320 we joined families or street organizations for that matter. Some 0:31:41.360 --> 0:31:43.760 people call them gangs because we're meeting a need's a 0:31:43.920 --> 0:31:45.920 human need. If you don't need to need, you die. 0:31:46.360 --> 0:31:49.960 Loving connection. The next human needs of growth. Every living 0:31:50.000 --> 0:31:52.720 thing must grow. It doesn't mean that it's progress, but 0:31:52.760 --> 0:31:55.880 it's gonna grow. Last human need is contribution to give 0:31:56.000 --> 0:31:59.280 us to get So these needs will be met or 0:31:59.320 --> 0:32:02.080 we will die. And these are universal human needs. The 0:32:02.120 --> 0:32:05.040 work that we do revolves around the fact that if 0:32:05.080 --> 0:32:08.640 you're in Chicago, south Side, West Side, Downtown, Brooklyn, East 0:32:08.680 --> 0:32:11.920 New York, Brownsville, if you're in Trinidad, these are the 0:32:12.040 --> 0:32:14.880 human needs that are either being met or not met. 0:32:14.920 --> 0:32:17.520 And when you talk about the need for acknowledging, you 0:32:17.520 --> 0:32:21.320 can meet that either in short term destructive ways or 0:32:21.480 --> 0:32:24.680 you can meet that need in long term positive community 0:32:24.800 --> 0:32:28.200 legacy building ways. But that need will be meant, The 0:32:28.360 --> 0:32:31.840 need will be met. I mean, I feel like your 0:32:32.000 --> 0:32:36.960 organization and so many of the others man up. I mean, 0:32:37.000 --> 0:32:39.840 there's a list that I could go on with just 0:32:39.920 --> 0:32:45.880 thinking about organizations across the nation. The New Black Panthers 0:32:45.920 --> 0:32:50.360 that are out in Chicago. Um, you got some folks. 0:32:50.360 --> 0:32:53.200 I forget the name of the organization. In fact, they're 0:32:53.240 --> 0:32:59.480 the Vegas chapter in Las Vegas, brother Minister Stretch. There 0:32:59.480 --> 0:33:03.880 are black men across the nation who are working at it, 0:33:04.240 --> 0:33:07.720 But I do think that the level of support, that acknowledgement, 0:33:07.800 --> 0:33:10.959 if you will, has to be increased somehow, And I 0:33:11.080 --> 0:33:15.040 wonder caving. I think in New York we've been able 0:33:15.080 --> 0:33:17.600 to do it to some degree because there is some 0:33:17.800 --> 0:33:21.120 level of a collective body. Do you think that the 0:33:21.280 --> 0:33:25.760 potentially the issue is the disconnect between the states and 0:33:25.800 --> 0:33:30.120 like sort of how tribal we can become in our 0:33:30.160 --> 0:33:33.000 particular areas, or do you just think like the government 0:33:33.040 --> 0:33:34.960 just ain't trying to really fund us, Like what do 0:33:35.040 --> 0:33:38.719 you think is the real problem? I appreciate the question. 0:33:38.760 --> 0:33:42.000 I read somewhere recently. I think it was Dr Rose 0:33:42.040 --> 0:33:46.280 at Brown University said, structure racism is the normalization and 0:33:46.400 --> 0:33:51.680 legitimization of a wide ray of dynamics historical, cultural, institutional, 0:33:51.720 --> 0:33:56.840 and interpersonal that routinely benefit whites while producing cumulative and 0:33:56.920 --> 0:34:00.640 chronic adverse outcomes for people of color. That's what she's said, 0:34:00.840 --> 0:34:04.440 and so let's look at that historical, cultural, institutional, interpersonal 0:34:04.640 --> 0:34:07.760 structural racisms at the base of it. Mike said it best. 0:34:07.800 --> 0:34:11.560 He said, it seems intentional because what gets highlighted. What 0:34:11.640 --> 0:34:14.960 gets brought to the forefront is the bullshit. What gets 0:34:14.960 --> 0:34:18.000 brought to the forefront is the most negative, the most 0:34:18.040 --> 0:34:22.200 buffoonish clown behavior. Again, my introduction to you all was 0:34:22.239 --> 0:34:24.640 a salute and to say, I appreciate you all allowing 0:34:24.680 --> 0:34:28.240 me into your dollargue because I truly respect what you represent. 0:34:28.360 --> 0:34:31.560 It's refreshing to see black men and women leaders like 0:34:31.600 --> 0:34:34.319 yourself having out of the comfort zone, out of the 0:34:34.400 --> 0:34:39.000 box conversations. This is what raises a community, this level 0:34:39.040 --> 0:34:42.399 of high level of conversation and dialogue. So I think 0:34:42.480 --> 0:34:45.120 to your to your question is intentionally done that way 0:34:45.440 --> 0:34:50.520 because of systemic structural racism. It allows for our demands 0:34:50.560 --> 0:34:54.359 were we are definitely under attack, and so that's why 0:34:54.480 --> 0:34:58.200 everything we do at CC do we are unapologetically black, brown, 0:34:58.280 --> 0:35:01.120 Indigenous people of color. And I and I respectfully in 0:35:01.160 --> 0:35:03.239 one of the co architects of the New York City 0:35:03.280 --> 0:35:06.400 Crisis Management System. But it was built on the lens 0:35:06.440 --> 0:35:09.000 that we approached it. When we talk about stopping shootings 0:35:09.000 --> 0:35:11.880 for three hundred and sixty five days, for example, in 0:35:11.920 --> 0:35:14.960 the largest housing development in North America, all could be 0:35:14.960 --> 0:35:18.840 the world Queensbridge Houses. It's because I followed. I followed 0:35:18.840 --> 0:35:21.520 some pillars and some principles called human justice that Eddie 0:35:21.560 --> 0:35:24.479 Ellis taught me. That Dr Divin Pryor and other great 0:35:24.800 --> 0:35:28.040 minds from the Attica Uprising from the green Haven Think Tank, 0:35:28.320 --> 0:35:31.439 those brothers who did the Seven seven Neighborhood studies, who 0:35:31.440 --> 0:35:33.279 did the language of it. They are the reason we 0:35:33.440 --> 0:35:37.680 used terms like formally incarcerating. They are the rehumanizers. So 0:35:37.800 --> 0:35:40.759 I say, we are the human justice lens. So when 0:35:40.760 --> 0:35:43.759 I do this work in Chicago, Hon Duras TRINITYA as 0:35:43.800 --> 0:35:47.200 I mentioned, you pick a continent. We're successful because of 0:35:47.239 --> 0:35:50.279 these needs that we talked about and approaching them with 0:35:50.320 --> 0:35:53.360 the Human Justice Lynch has been a great successful us. 0:35:53.400 --> 0:35:56.480 What's different is we have to get what we've done 0:35:56.480 --> 0:35:59.239 in New York City that has worked to be replicated 0:35:59.280 --> 0:36:01.840 in another space. It we put our political structure in 0:36:01.840 --> 0:36:05.719 the headlin. We hold them account of wealth. You talk Bloomberg, 0:36:05.800 --> 0:36:09.680 the Blasio, now Adams, we advised them, but we regulate. 0:36:10.040 --> 0:36:12.600 We understand that. You know, human justice is an equation 0:36:12.920 --> 0:36:18.480 human rights. That's consciousness plus human development, that's resources equals 0:36:18.560 --> 0:36:22.239 human justice. Don't just give me information and don't just 0:36:22.280 --> 0:36:24.560 give me don't even just give me the resources. I 0:36:24.680 --> 0:36:27.520 read somewhere once that if the tooth percent, that control 0:36:28.280 --> 0:36:30.320 of the wealth on the earth was to be taken 0:36:30.360 --> 0:36:32.799 from them and distributed equally, in a short amount of 0:36:32.800 --> 0:36:35.560 time will be back in their hands. So it's about 0:36:35.600 --> 0:36:39.960 the information, understanding wealth, intergenerational wealth, understanding how we build 0:36:39.960 --> 0:36:44.040 that out. I lead a multimillion dollar nonprofit organization because 0:36:44.080 --> 0:36:46.960 I understand those principles and apply them. We opened the 0:36:47.040 --> 0:36:49.960 thousand bank accounts in black and brown housing developments in 0:36:50.000 --> 0:36:52.160 New York City because we understand that not just to 0:36:52.239 --> 0:36:55.840 open the accounts, but the fiscal aptitude, the financial literacy 0:36:56.200 --> 0:36:59.480 that was connected to those accounts. You understanding of credit, 0:37:00.000 --> 0:37:02.480 you know, what does it mean to have that? When 0:37:02.480 --> 0:37:04.480 we was in the stream, people like myself and brother 0:37:04.600 --> 0:37:07.439 my song, hustling and scrambling and survival mode, we did 0:37:07.440 --> 0:37:10.400 a cost benefit analysis and we saw that we weren't 0:37:10.400 --> 0:37:12.920 getting opportunities to be employed. I tried to get a job, 0:37:13.360 --> 0:37:15.799 but my course benefits analysis said, and I know that, 0:37:16.360 --> 0:37:19.080 it said, you know I can make forty dollars in 0:37:19.080 --> 0:37:23.080 a weekend talking net I'm not talking gross right, without 0:37:23.120 --> 0:37:25.400 any school, without any So these are the things that 0:37:25.480 --> 0:37:28.239 young people. We talk about that demographic, that high risk 0:37:28.280 --> 0:37:32.360 population from fourteen to twenty four, even thirty years of age. 0:37:32.800 --> 0:37:36.240 They're doing this cost benefit analysis, but they're not factoring 0:37:36.360 --> 0:37:39.680 in the risk reward. They're not. Nobody's telling them, like 0:37:39.760 --> 0:37:41.880 my son is, this is what it feels like the 0:37:41.880 --> 0:37:44.239 first day when you step behind those bars. This is 0:37:44.280 --> 0:37:46.279 what happens to all your homies when you're sitting up 0:37:46.280 --> 0:37:49.440 there your first six months and your girl disappeared. You know, 0:37:49.520 --> 0:37:51.680 your the people supposed to ride with you not there. 0:37:51.719 --> 0:37:53.640 There are some people that are that are speaking at 0:37:53.760 --> 0:37:56.880 unpopular truth. And so I think, to your point, we 0:37:56.880 --> 0:38:00.480 gotta turn that up and turned down the bullshit. Yeah, 0:38:00.560 --> 0:38:02.040 So can I just ask one more question? And then 0:38:02.080 --> 0:38:05.279 I want you guys to finish it. And maybe I'm 0:38:05.360 --> 0:38:09.200 changing the direction both One of the things that something 0:38:09.239 --> 0:38:11.040 so I is my son is not the only man 0:38:11.120 --> 0:38:13.439 that I drive crazy with all of my thoughts when 0:38:13.440 --> 0:38:15.759 I whenever something hits me, especially when it comes to 0:38:15.800 --> 0:38:19.040 black men. So I call another black man and I explained, 0:38:19.160 --> 0:38:21.760 you know what I experienced and what the lady said 0:38:21.800 --> 0:38:24.480 I was at the graduation. There was so many black mothers. 0:38:24.520 --> 0:38:27.440 There wasn't really it was plenty, you know, some black men, 0:38:27.560 --> 0:38:31.000 but not as many as black women. And I was like, 0:38:31.080 --> 0:38:34.960 something is wrong here. And the person said to me 0:38:35.600 --> 0:38:39.360 that the biggest challenge he had with trying to be 0:38:39.480 --> 0:38:43.319 there to support his son was a relationship between him 0:38:43.520 --> 0:38:48.279 and his mother. That it caused him to want to 0:38:48.440 --> 0:38:52.440 you know, he wanted to be between him and the 0:38:52.520 --> 0:38:57.239 child's mother, child's mother, his his his child's mother. He said, 0:38:57.280 --> 0:39:00.000 he wanted to be there, but it was very different, 0:39:00.000 --> 0:39:02.840 a cool and sometimes for me, I'm gonna be honest, 0:39:03.239 --> 0:39:05.480 I know that there, I know it. I know we 0:39:05.560 --> 0:39:08.000 can be difficult. I've seen some of my sisters do 0:39:08.160 --> 0:39:11.760 some real crazy stuff. I've seen it. But I also 0:39:11.880 --> 0:39:15.160 feel like it's a cop out for something, for something, 0:39:15.200 --> 0:39:17.640 not all, but for some. And so I want to 0:39:17.680 --> 0:39:22.799 talk about that because to me, again, the relationship between us, 0:39:22.800 --> 0:39:25.920 whether we are together in a relationship or not. Because 0:39:25.960 --> 0:39:28.560 my argument with my son is that a lot of 0:39:28.600 --> 0:39:33.040 men do not know how to operate as a parent 0:39:33.239 --> 0:39:37.239 unlessed in a relationship with the mother, and and and 0:39:37.360 --> 0:39:41.120 vice versa the mothers too. So I just because I'm 0:39:41.480 --> 0:39:44.640 I'm from the mindset that the breakdown in our family 0:39:44.719 --> 0:39:48.440 has something to do with how our kids are slipping 0:39:48.560 --> 0:39:52.399 through because they we're not on the same page. Well, 0:39:52.440 --> 0:39:55.920 for me, there's there's a lot in what you said, right, 0:39:56.440 --> 0:39:58.919 I want to read this thing first. That Charlemagne post 0:39:58.920 --> 0:40:01.799 is the data. So that's so you know on point 0:40:01.840 --> 0:40:03.799 about what we're dealing right now, he said, Trauma in 0:40:03.800 --> 0:40:09.520 the person decontextualized over time looks like personality. Trauma and 0:40:09.560 --> 0:40:14.440 the family decontextualized over time looks like family traits. Trauma 0:40:14.440 --> 0:40:19.280 and the people decontextualize over time looks like culture. Right. 0:40:19.560 --> 0:40:21.920 So we're dealing with so much trauma that it is 0:40:22.040 --> 0:40:25.360 morphed into what we call our own personality and we 0:40:25.400 --> 0:40:29.600 don't even identify it as something wrong. Right. So and 0:40:29.600 --> 0:40:31.480 that so now to give what you're talking about as 0:40:31.480 --> 0:40:36.680 far as relationships, as as a man, most men look 0:40:36.719 --> 0:40:40.920 for peace and stability, right, we want we don't We 0:40:40.960 --> 0:40:42.920 don't want to deal with drama. We don't want to 0:40:42.920 --> 0:40:45.640 deal with arguments. We don't want, especially with somebody that 0:40:45.680 --> 0:40:48.680 we actually care for or we don't that we feel 0:40:48.680 --> 0:40:51.279 like we have some level of connection with. We do 0:40:51.360 --> 0:40:55.680 not want to be an adversary to that individual. So, 0:40:55.800 --> 0:40:59.239 when you're in a relationship with somebody and you sever 0:40:59.360 --> 0:41:02.760 that relationship ships based on the fact that there's no peace, 0:41:02.800 --> 0:41:07.360 and there's no tranquility, and there's always argument and and 0:41:07.960 --> 0:41:13.439 there's always vile situations. It's very unlikely that a man 0:41:13.520 --> 0:41:17.120 wants to re enter that situation all the time. Right. So, 0:41:17.160 --> 0:41:18.880 if you have a woman that you were in a 0:41:18.920 --> 0:41:22.080 relationship with who is the mother of your children, you 0:41:22.120 --> 0:41:24.879 go through you try, right, because I've seen many men 0:41:25.000 --> 0:41:28.120 try to be as peaceful as possible. Why we can't 0:41:28.360 --> 0:41:30.960 know f being peaceful? You need to do this or 0:41:31.000 --> 0:41:34.359 do that, right, So what happens is most men, when 0:41:34.400 --> 0:41:37.000 you leave that situation and you find a peace of mind, 0:41:37.000 --> 0:41:40.200 and you find a level of stability and comfort and peace, 0:41:40.719 --> 0:41:43.799 you don't want to keep entering into that. And when 0:41:43.920 --> 0:41:48.200 you find somebody who has made a conscious decision that 0:41:48.239 --> 0:41:51.239 don't matter what happens, I'm not going to make this 0:41:51.320 --> 0:41:56.040 comfortable for you. Right. Over times, the average man will 0:41:56.160 --> 0:42:00.520 separate itself from that situation completely. And it's not because 0:42:00.520 --> 0:42:03.360 he doesn't love the child. It's not because he doesn't 0:42:03.440 --> 0:42:05.839 value his child want to be there. Is that he 0:42:05.960 --> 0:42:11.200 realizes that his own mental state is to him more 0:42:11.239 --> 0:42:14.680 important because if he's not mentally stable, if this, if 0:42:14.680 --> 0:42:17.200 his situation is able to put him in a position 0:42:17.239 --> 0:42:21.440 to it jeopardizes his life, his mentality, his freedom because 0:42:21.440 --> 0:42:24.960 of this relationship with the parents, then he separates itself. 0:42:25.120 --> 0:42:28.400 When you realize that when you see that woman, uh 0:42:28.440 --> 0:42:31.759 and in men who have somehow come to terms and 0:42:31.760 --> 0:42:35.160 they're able to co parent peacefully and the peacefully coexists, 0:42:35.680 --> 0:42:37.920 you see a lot less a lot more men in 0:42:38.000 --> 0:42:41.240 those relationships with their children, right. And it it takes 0:42:41.280 --> 0:42:44.160 time and maybe over four or five years, you know 0:42:44.200 --> 0:42:46.160 what happens. Like me and my baby mother used to 0:42:46.280 --> 0:42:48.160 argue all the time. We were at odds. And it 0:42:48.200 --> 0:42:50.399 wasn't because I wanted to be with her. I wasn't 0:42:50.400 --> 0:42:52.520 trying to be with her. It just that she had 0:42:52.640 --> 0:42:54.920 whatever it was. I'm not blaming her and me, but 0:42:55.280 --> 0:42:58.640 for some reason, there was always contention. Every time that 0:42:58.719 --> 0:43:00.680 we spoke, or we are trying to deal with the 0:43:00.719 --> 0:43:03.040 kids or trying to show up, it was always some 0:43:03.160 --> 0:43:06.959 type of contention. When that contention disappeared, we were able 0:43:07.000 --> 0:43:11.319 to co parents so well, we became best friends. Our 0:43:11.400 --> 0:43:14.280 son benefited from it. And I've noticed that over time 0:43:14.360 --> 0:43:17.000 with most people. So I don't know. I've never been 0:43:17.000 --> 0:43:19.600 a woman, so I can't give you the prospective of 0:43:19.680 --> 0:43:22.879 a woman exactly how she said. But I know as men, 0:43:23.000 --> 0:43:25.759 we really just want peace. We do not want to 0:43:25.800 --> 0:43:28.759 be in contention every time that we're dealing with somebody. 0:43:28.960 --> 0:43:31.040 Nobody wants to do that, and we will. And and 0:43:31.080 --> 0:43:35.000 then average man will completely sacrifice any relationship, even with 0:43:35.080 --> 0:43:38.560 his kids. I know men who have had those interactions 0:43:38.560 --> 0:43:40.520 with their kids when when you and the kids start 0:43:40.560 --> 0:43:43.320 fighting and I gotta kick you up, they separate themselves 0:43:43.360 --> 0:43:46.000 from their children until they're able to have some level 0:43:46.040 --> 0:43:48.200 of civility because they do not want to deal with that. 0:43:48.440 --> 0:43:50.799 Women don't do that. Women will argue with the son, 0:43:51.120 --> 0:43:53.520 the daughter, their fight every day. They're being the street. 0:43:53.719 --> 0:43:56.399 You're doing that, man, if we're not wired that way, 0:43:56.719 --> 0:44:02.160 m a passion. You had a question in the brother's perspective, 0:44:02.239 --> 0:44:05.239 he's speaking from where he's lived. I mean, it's hard 0:44:05.280 --> 0:44:07.919 to argue make a very compelling stance. I'm gonna say 0:44:07.920 --> 0:44:10.480 further so in my intro they talk. You talked a 0:44:10.520 --> 0:44:12.680 little bit about me being, you know, in this anti 0:44:12.719 --> 0:44:16.080 gun violence work, but that's just a byproduct human justice 0:44:16.080 --> 0:44:20.400 work is I'm mentioning is about communication. It's about providing 0:44:20.440 --> 0:44:24.440 our youth and our women are sisters, everyone with advanced 0:44:24.440 --> 0:44:27.040 tools to communicate because we didn't have that. We don't 0:44:27.040 --> 0:44:29.239 have that foundation in our homes a lot of the time, 0:44:29.239 --> 0:44:31.560 we dam sure on't got it in the schools. So 0:44:31.640 --> 0:44:34.400 it's about what we do is gift tools for people 0:44:34.400 --> 0:44:37.840 that have had lives lost between them, have had bloodshed 0:44:37.880 --> 0:44:41.239 between them, and truce agreements and peace agreements, abilities to 0:44:41.320 --> 0:44:45.880 communicate right means to communicate. So one of my businesses 0:44:45.960 --> 0:44:48.600 is a law firm, Claudia and Associates. Less than five 0:44:48.680 --> 0:44:52.080 percent of attorneys in this country are of color, less 0:44:52.080 --> 0:44:54.839 than two percent are women of color. I'm a co 0:44:55.000 --> 0:44:57.719 founder owner of a law firm in Queens, New York 0:44:57.880 --> 0:45:01.040 called Claudian Associates. It's a matrimon to your firm. We 0:45:01.360 --> 0:45:04.000 focus and specialized all women of coloring that run this 0:45:04.080 --> 0:45:08.600 firm on parental alienation. What is that? That's because what 0:45:08.719 --> 0:45:11.600 Mike was talking about, this is not only of visceral 0:45:11.719 --> 0:45:16.200 response to being in complete total just contentious behavior back 0:45:16.239 --> 0:45:18.279 and forth. There's also prison at the end of that. 0:45:18.840 --> 0:45:21.040 There's also a jail cell at the end up being 0:45:21.040 --> 0:45:24.359 where summer to day or allegation or a threat. There's 0:45:24.360 --> 0:45:26.560 also a kidnapp in charge if you take your child 0:45:26.560 --> 0:45:30.000 from school without permission, so in and to add on 0:45:30.080 --> 0:45:33.080 to the brow like this, there's another level of consequence 0:45:33.320 --> 0:45:35.759 when these things are not handle certain ways. And I'm 0:45:35.800 --> 0:45:39.440 not making excuse or justification. Look, since mice being personal, 0:45:39.760 --> 0:45:41.960 I would take and this just keep this between us 0:45:41.960 --> 0:45:44.680 and the listeners. I would take any level of disrespectful 0:45:44.680 --> 0:45:46.600 in the queen she could do. She gotta. She gott 0:45:46.600 --> 0:45:49.399 a great as long as my children that's me, that's 0:45:49.440 --> 0:45:52.000 me and my relationship like the golf of then she 0:45:52.080 --> 0:45:53.920 take this in row. But I don't think she's that person. 0:45:53.960 --> 0:45:55.960 But if she did it, so I'm gonna work with 0:45:56.000 --> 0:45:59.120 my children. You know, my youngest is eight, So no 0:45:59.120 --> 0:46:01.399 matter I made that had a mother, I would true 0:46:01.440 --> 0:46:03.600 that your mother western your mother who was like you 0:46:03.680 --> 0:46:06.279 see what I'm doing. You see the sacrifices I'm making. 0:46:06.320 --> 0:46:09.200 Your father's not here right, so that when you have 0:46:09.320 --> 0:46:11.200 a family. She taught me I was six seven, eight 0:46:11.280 --> 0:46:14.239 years old, so that you don't make excuses. You beat 0:46:14.239 --> 0:46:17.040 there for your children. That's superseded, that comes before. So 0:46:17.200 --> 0:46:20.719 that's my personal approach that we gotta work yourself. If 0:46:20.760 --> 0:46:22.200 I got to sleep in this room or you and 0:46:22.280 --> 0:46:25.160 I'm not going what hopes at the house on fire. 0:46:25.280 --> 0:46:28.640 I ain't leaving, that's me. But everybody got to make 0:46:28.719 --> 0:46:31.319 their decisions and work. They work, but until minds are 0:46:31.360 --> 0:46:34.080 old enough to take care. But the bottom line is, 0:46:34.120 --> 0:46:37.960 it's about communication. It's about communication in the court system. 0:46:38.520 --> 0:46:42.560 Men and women right have an entirely different set of 0:46:42.600 --> 0:46:46.320 privileges in the court of law as as it pertains 0:46:46.440 --> 0:46:51.560 to matrimonial on the family law. Absolutely, and I don't disagree, 0:46:51.640 --> 0:46:55.200 and but I still here something and I and I 0:46:55.719 --> 0:46:58.440 understand that point that there are certain people you just 0:46:58.640 --> 0:47:01.239 can't be around them because they're dangerous. And it's just 0:47:01.400 --> 0:47:04.320 my cousin literally just got out of prison because he 0:47:04.440 --> 0:47:08.840 went to his you know, child's mother's home and something 0:47:08.960 --> 0:47:11.480 happened and the next thing, you know, he got locked up. 0:47:11.760 --> 0:47:14.840 In fact, I have another cousin who was just sentenced 0:47:15.120 --> 0:47:16.719 and I'm not sure how long, but he was just 0:47:16.840 --> 0:47:19.480 put in prison. He might not be older than twenty 0:47:19.560 --> 0:47:23.640 three for rape because of something that happened with his 0:47:23.760 --> 0:47:28.600 baby mother. And so this is very serious. I get it. 0:47:28.719 --> 0:47:32.520 It's life threatening but I have to say that I 0:47:32.680 --> 0:47:36.040 know some men and a lot of them where the 0:47:36.120 --> 0:47:40.560 women are like I, Like you said, your mother, the 0:47:40.680 --> 0:47:44.120 doors open. You could come and be here and take 0:47:44.200 --> 0:47:46.400 your child and do what you want. But you need 0:47:46.440 --> 0:47:48.160 to stop trying to sleep with me when you come 0:47:48.200 --> 0:47:52.280 in this house. You need to stop sending me crazy messages, 0:47:52.440 --> 0:47:56.040 and you need to be accountable for things and for 0:47:56.400 --> 0:47:59.480 for your actions. What hurts me is that I have 0:48:00.000 --> 0:48:04.560 any friends that they are raising sons, and they are 0:48:04.760 --> 0:48:09.560 constantly saying things like ask your father, see what your 0:48:09.600 --> 0:48:13.080 father says? Like can your father help? Sometimes? Can your 0:48:13.120 --> 0:48:16.799 father is your father? And the fathers are there when 0:48:16.920 --> 0:48:18.960 they want to be. My girlfriend just told me the 0:48:19.000 --> 0:48:22.279 other day, Oh, Christmas time he shows up big time. 0:48:22.560 --> 0:48:25.000 But in fact we don't really need him. That Christmas 0:48:25.160 --> 0:48:28.480 is much because everybody's giving himself a Christmas. What we 0:48:28.640 --> 0:48:31.880 need is just a regular Tuesday visit and and not 0:48:32.080 --> 0:48:34.600 a holiday visit. And I told my son that I 0:48:34.719 --> 0:48:38.239 get the sense that even this man, who's a good guy, 0:48:38.280 --> 0:48:40.120 and I don't know when his you know, maybe he 0:48:40.239 --> 0:48:44.040 never had Christmas. You know, who knows. But maybe it's 0:48:44.120 --> 0:48:49.680 the lack of older men being in a stable position 0:48:49.840 --> 0:48:53.400 enough to teach younger men what it looks like to 0:48:53.680 --> 0:48:57.920 be a father who's able to navigate through dealing with 0:48:58.080 --> 0:49:01.960 an upset or trauma. Phil Mother like your point about 0:49:02.160 --> 0:49:06.160 a healing network or organization, And you brought up Charlemagne. 0:49:06.280 --> 0:49:09.279 That's important because he's been talking so much about black 0:49:09.360 --> 0:49:14.480 men getting help. I feel like we would do ourselves, um, 0:49:15.239 --> 0:49:19.200 all of us as a community, some some justice. Look 0:49:19.280 --> 0:49:20.920 I'm and I know I'm talking long, but let me 0:49:21.000 --> 0:49:24.040 go and say this. When I go around black women, 0:49:25.080 --> 0:49:29.920 we spend a great deal of time talking about our issues, 0:49:31.440 --> 0:49:34.279 being me being checked by my aunt or some other 0:49:34.360 --> 0:49:38.200 women about my behavior, what happened. When I'm a fly 0:49:38.400 --> 0:49:40.960 on the wall listening to men, I hear a lot 0:49:41.000 --> 0:49:46.560 of conversations about sports, about you know, just cool and breezy. 0:49:47.239 --> 0:49:53.560 But I don't necessarily here men really getting into with 0:49:53.840 --> 0:49:59.360 young men in these settings, conversations about life and so that. 0:49:59.600 --> 0:50:02.600 And maybe I'm listening, but I see with with with 0:50:02.800 --> 0:50:09.560 with women, we have empowerment spaces this day, that conference, 0:50:09.719 --> 0:50:11.640 we do all that we can do to try to 0:50:11.760 --> 0:50:15.680 empower ourselves, and I don't see the same with black men. 0:50:15.800 --> 0:50:18.040 But I could be wrong, not not that it doesn't 0:50:18.040 --> 0:50:20.759 happen at all. I don't see it as much. You 0:50:20.800 --> 0:50:22.840 gotta you gotta hang out at C C D sometime. 0:50:22.840 --> 0:50:24.239 I want to right go for you to come out. 0:50:24.320 --> 0:50:26.319 We gotta office in every ball, but the main one 0:50:26.400 --> 0:50:28.480 is on something for the board and Queens. I wanna 0:50:28.480 --> 0:50:30.640 write you to come out. Even in Queensbridge we do. 0:50:30.840 --> 0:50:32.640 We do the hell of Justice circles. We just have 0:50:32.840 --> 0:50:37.120 one and it's mentorship. It's really like there's people taking 0:50:37.160 --> 0:50:40.080 off their masks, you know that that have black mikes, 0:50:40.120 --> 0:50:41.840 have have lived and been through some things. I know 0:50:42.000 --> 0:50:45.200 my songing probably going on almost like I've been in 0:50:45.320 --> 0:50:47.839 closing him Fat Joe and the front. I've never heard 0:50:48.000 --> 0:50:50.000 this portion of him or a bit like and that's 0:50:50.040 --> 0:50:52.880 my brother, somebody I've known and respected for a long time. 0:50:52.920 --> 0:50:55.440 But we to your point, we don't always find those 0:50:55.560 --> 0:50:57.439 moments to be like, Yo, how long I've been dealing 0:50:57.480 --> 0:50:59.919 with my partner, my be besting partner for twenty eight years. 0:51:00.000 --> 0:51:02.160 She's been in my life since I was fifteen sixty 0:51:02.239 --> 0:51:04.719 years old. But I don't speak about that to my brothers. 0:51:04.760 --> 0:51:06.719 Were talking about a whole lot of other things. So 0:51:06.840 --> 0:51:08.759 I think there's spaces when we when we work with 0:51:08.840 --> 0:51:11.000 the young people, to youth builders as we call them, 0:51:11.360 --> 0:51:14.359 we do have these conversations. We do talk about how 0:51:14.440 --> 0:51:16.839 to communicate. But but a lot of the self kid 0:51:16.920 --> 0:51:19.480 is self love has to happen first. You can't know 0:51:19.640 --> 0:51:22.080 how to speak to somebody else when you alund yourself 0:51:22.160 --> 0:51:24.359 to be dehumanized, when you walk around in the world 0:51:24.400 --> 0:51:27.000 feeling powerless, when you walk around the world being dictated 0:51:27.080 --> 0:51:28.960 to every step of the way, when you can't even 0:51:29.000 --> 0:51:31.320 get decent food in your body, but your mind is 0:51:31.320 --> 0:51:34.080 supposed to be in these elevated positions that you're describing, 0:51:34.400 --> 0:51:36.799 it's not really realistic. A lot of design for us, right. 0:51:37.080 --> 0:51:38.919 So I remember being with my girl, like I said, 0:51:39.000 --> 0:51:41.520 from those teenage years, and at one point, you know, 0:51:41.560 --> 0:51:43.359 it gets rockey, you kind of get caught out there. 0:51:44.040 --> 0:51:45.880 You should ain't adding up this way and that way. 0:51:45.920 --> 0:51:47.719 And she's like, yeah, what's up with you? She said, Kay? 0:51:48.080 --> 0:51:50.120 You the loyalists, dude, Like you don't do nothing without 0:51:50.160 --> 0:51:52.560 your guys, Like you're on the phone everything, your word 0:51:52.719 --> 0:51:56.480 is everything. But with me, and I said, I never 0:51:56.640 --> 0:51:59.839 saw that. I never got that training. I know how 0:51:59.880 --> 0:52:01.600 to be stand up, I know how to stand on 0:52:01.680 --> 0:52:03.680 my word. I died for my word, but I didn't. 0:52:03.880 --> 0:52:06.319 I've never seen and I wasn't copying. I wasn't trying 0:52:06.320 --> 0:52:07.920 to copy people. I was telling her, I like that 0:52:08.000 --> 0:52:10.719 ain't part of the manuscript that I inherited from the 0:52:10.800 --> 0:52:13.480 streets I never saw, not in my house and not 0:52:13.640 --> 0:52:15.920 in people around me. You understand I'm saying. So I'm 0:52:15.960 --> 0:52:17.600 telling her, like, you want me to do things with 0:52:17.760 --> 0:52:21.279 you that I've never seen, experience, witnessed, or been a 0:52:21.360 --> 0:52:24.239 part of. So she was, you know, she's like, yo, 0:52:24.320 --> 0:52:25.960 but with the guys, you know what to do? Is 0:52:26.040 --> 0:52:29.160 this way? Never? I don't know, We're not. It's all 0:52:29.239 --> 0:52:31.920 written in the code, she said. She said, where is 0:52:31.960 --> 0:52:34.200 the code for me? And I think that's the point. 0:52:34.280 --> 0:52:37.840 We gotta establish the code for us as brothers and 0:52:37.960 --> 0:52:43.560 sisters in relationships. Really, I just want to I just 0:52:43.640 --> 0:52:46.040 want to end it by saying, you know, we do. 0:52:46.440 --> 0:52:48.520 We have a lot of these conversations. Like you know, 0:52:48.640 --> 0:52:51.960 I take a lot of my my brothers, my nephew, 0:52:52.080 --> 0:52:55.279 like I I've sat down with them, every every young 0:52:55.360 --> 0:52:58.759 man is in direct contact for me, and any young 0:52:59.040 --> 0:53:01.000 guys that I mentor, I sit down and have real 0:53:01.120 --> 0:53:04.880 conversations just based off, you know, my reality in my 0:53:05.000 --> 0:53:07.480 life and what I've been through. And I tell all 0:53:07.560 --> 0:53:09.880 of them like I'm a cheat sheet through life. And 0:53:09.920 --> 0:53:12.880 if you just take, you know, some of the influence 0:53:12.960 --> 0:53:16.359 and understand in the wisdom that I got, you don't 0:53:16.400 --> 0:53:18.480 have to make the mistakes that I mean, you know. 0:53:18.640 --> 0:53:20.840 And unfortunately, there are a lot of young guys that 0:53:20.880 --> 0:53:22.600 I sit down and I have conversation, and I know 0:53:22.760 --> 0:53:26.600 that they're powerful and the note. But unfortunately some of 0:53:26.680 --> 0:53:28.360 them I have to gonna go through a little They 0:53:28.360 --> 0:53:30.719 ain't gonna get their hand burnt off. They're not gonna 0:53:30.760 --> 0:53:32.439 do a bunch of years in jail, but they're gonna 0:53:32.440 --> 0:53:34.600 get arrested one or two times, and then they're gonna 0:53:34.600 --> 0:53:37.160 come back to me and say, I know, I understand 0:53:37.200 --> 0:53:39.840 what you're saying. At twenty years old, it was the 0:53:39.880 --> 0:53:42.640 first time that my son ever admitted to me that 0:53:42.719 --> 0:53:44.720 I was always right. I see you on the Facebook 0:53:44.760 --> 0:53:47.680 post he called me. He didn't say your dad you right, 0:53:47.920 --> 0:53:51.360 he wrote on the It was like, you know what, 0:53:52.120 --> 0:53:54.759 today is the first day I realized that my dad 0:53:55.000 --> 0:53:58.239 never told me anything that was wrong. Everything he ever 0:53:58.320 --> 0:54:01.600 said to me was one that's a beautiful falling, and 0:54:01.719 --> 0:54:03.400 that's where it comes to. And I tell, and I 0:54:03.480 --> 0:54:05.120 tell a lot of women. I tell to me because 0:54:05.120 --> 0:54:07.160 you gotta tell. These boys tell us and I'd be 0:54:07.239 --> 0:54:10.799 like to Meka. Unfortunately, men are whired a little different, right, 0:54:11.080 --> 0:54:13.200 They're gonna have mentors that they listen to and they 0:54:13.280 --> 0:54:16.359 take in their information. They're taking it in. You don't 0:54:16.400 --> 0:54:18.840 know they're taking it in. It's one day that it 0:54:18.920 --> 0:54:23.160 clicks in you. An opportunity for them to navigate and 0:54:23.280 --> 0:54:27.160 see things because unfortunately they don't believe. They don't always 0:54:27.239 --> 0:54:30.360 believe anything that everybody says right, So they gotta go 0:54:30.560 --> 0:54:35.000 through certain things and see certain outcomes for themselves to 0:54:35.120 --> 0:54:37.360 be able to go back and say this, this is 0:54:37.440 --> 0:54:39.560 exactly what my mother, This is exactly what makes you 0:54:39.600 --> 0:54:42.560 say it to me. So all our job is to 0:54:42.760 --> 0:54:45.560 to to be like the right. It's like you know, 0:54:45.640 --> 0:54:47.960 in the bowling alley, we're making sure that it don't 0:54:48.000 --> 0:54:49.960 go into the the put the rails up for the 0:54:50.239 --> 0:54:52.040 for the new beginning, to make sure they don't go 0:54:52.120 --> 0:54:54.320 in the gutter. We're just making sure don't go in 0:54:54.400 --> 0:54:56.480 the gutters. So we just were right there. We we 0:54:56.640 --> 0:54:58.600 can't do all of it. These are gonna be men, 0:54:58.920 --> 0:55:01.520 and they're going to their want to have their old egos, 0:55:01.800 --> 0:55:03.840 and they're gonna deal with certain things. But we're just 0:55:03.920 --> 0:55:05.839 gonna make sure that they don't go too far leftl 0:55:05.920 --> 0:55:10.120 or two far a right that they even listen. You 0:55:10.320 --> 0:55:14.480 said everything right, because you definitely do mentor speak to 0:55:14.719 --> 0:55:17.360 and try to help young men. And I know that 0:55:17.840 --> 0:55:20.719 all the black men around me are really doing all 0:55:20.800 --> 0:55:23.480 that they can. I guess the point that I've been 0:55:23.760 --> 0:55:25.960 trying to get to and what is on my spirit 0:55:26.440 --> 0:55:29.160 is that we've got to expand this, you know, um, 0:55:29.480 --> 0:55:35.239 expanding work, expand these conversations, because there's something wrong when 0:55:35.280 --> 0:55:38.160 a fifteen year old young black kid is able to 0:55:38.320 --> 0:55:42.040 break the bones of a woman who looks like his grandmother, 0:55:42.160 --> 0:55:45.360 and it's happening every single day, So there is a 0:55:45.480 --> 0:55:49.000 missing link. Um. And I know the system is responsible. 0:55:49.960 --> 0:55:53.560 I know it's all these things, but we just like 0:55:53.840 --> 0:55:56.719 we as as I said, black women, I think I 0:55:56.800 --> 0:56:00.160 think black men can learn something from the way in 0:56:00.239 --> 0:56:04.440 which black women organize ourselves. The ways in which we 0:56:04.920 --> 0:56:07.040 work with one another. Doesn't mean we don't go left 0:56:07.080 --> 0:56:08.719 and right. Because my mom and them tried to tell me, 0:56:08.840 --> 0:56:10.520 don't do this that in the third and I did 0:56:10.600 --> 0:56:13.560 all those things, including love the wrong guys. I mean, 0:56:13.680 --> 0:56:16.200 you name it. We all, like you said, Mike, but 0:56:16.840 --> 0:56:20.520 there's something about us right now that has Black women 0:56:20.560 --> 0:56:25.000 are the as the leading entrepreneurs, the most graduated. You know, 0:56:25.160 --> 0:56:29.400 in these different classes. We're seeing black women graduating like crazy. 0:56:29.880 --> 0:56:34.520 We're seeing black women leading households also, um in a 0:56:34.640 --> 0:56:37.640 very powerful way. And and yes, certainly is structural. And 0:56:37.719 --> 0:56:40.799 there's always been a division between us that has been 0:56:40.920 --> 0:56:45.320 manufactured by this nation. We know that. But I think that, 0:56:45.719 --> 0:56:48.640 like the underground railroad, we gotta figure out how to 0:56:48.760 --> 0:56:51.279 institute some of whatever is in the soup that we're 0:56:51.360 --> 0:56:54.360 cooking as black women, and do it you alway the 0:56:54.440 --> 0:56:56.960 way you all have been doing it, but just expanded 0:56:57.000 --> 0:57:00.520 and get y'all's voices out everywhere more often. I want 0:57:00.520 --> 0:57:06.440 to hear Cabin every week or somebody's national podcast talking 0:57:06.480 --> 0:57:09.759 what you're talking and dropping that knowledge. I appreciate more 0:57:09.840 --> 0:57:13.040 than you know, the opportunity to be amongst greatness. It 0:57:13.160 --> 0:57:16.000 means the world that you would include me and your dialogue. 0:57:16.040 --> 0:57:19.200 This is sacred. We call people like you real models. 0:57:19.840 --> 0:57:21.880 We don't call you role models. We call your real 0:57:22.000 --> 0:57:25.040 models because you've been through some things and you're authentic. 0:57:25.480 --> 0:57:28.120 So the youth with Mike said, when you plant that seat, 0:57:28.160 --> 0:57:31.480 it's gonna germinate. It's it's undeniable when you're dealing with 0:57:31.600 --> 0:57:33.600 people who are coming from their hearts like you too. 0:57:34.200 --> 0:57:36.800 So again, privilege and honor. There's a tool I'm gonna 0:57:36.880 --> 0:57:39.280 leave you with this. It's a tool that CCD. It's 0:57:39.320 --> 0:57:42.600 called the Sustainable Growth Plan. The next time y'all have 0:57:42.760 --> 0:57:44.640 me on, the next time you'll passed by the shop 0:57:44.760 --> 0:57:46.840 so we can chopping up in person. I want to 0:57:46.920 --> 0:57:50.280 talk about this tool that is the bridge from survival 0:57:50.360 --> 0:57:54.280 mode mentalities that we come from to ones of creation 0:57:54.360 --> 0:57:58.320 where we're defining and designing our identity and our actions 0:57:58.360 --> 0:58:02.600 for ourselves. Thank you, Kabang, thank you for coming on today. 0:58:02.920 --> 0:58:06.240 We're certainly gonna have you um to be back and 0:58:06.360 --> 0:58:08.400 we're definitely going to come out and visit you and 0:58:08.440 --> 0:58:11.280 maybe we'll do street politicians right from inside or I 0:58:11.320 --> 0:58:15.120 would love it. I would love it. Respect to the 0:58:15.200 --> 0:58:22.040 Guard to Beautiful as always Queer shout out to Kim 0:58:22.080 --> 0:58:24.080 Baby my brother man. He told you we have a 0:58:24.160 --> 0:58:27.040 long standing history brother that I've known for years. And 0:58:27.120 --> 0:58:30.480 just watched him evolved and elevate from these streets in 0:58:30.600 --> 0:58:33.240 which you know we both come from, and just understanding 0:58:33.600 --> 0:58:35.400 that there is elevation. That's what I try to tell 0:58:35.440 --> 0:58:37.560 you all the time. These kids gonna get it to Mika, 0:58:37.760 --> 0:58:39.840 because we got it. We had to go through some things. 0:58:39.920 --> 0:58:42.120 I know, you look, you know when you're looking, you 0:58:42.240 --> 0:58:44.280 like them. They're not on the right path. But as 0:58:44.360 --> 0:58:46.600 long as they ain't in jail, as long as they 0:58:46.760 --> 0:58:49.360 enough in the streets shooting and killing and all that, 0:58:49.520 --> 0:58:52.760 they have an opportunity. So they are. But they are. 0:58:53.080 --> 0:58:55.760 That's the problem. I'm just trying to tell you ours 0:58:55.840 --> 0:59:00.880 are not. I wasn't not I wasn't, but I include 0:59:01.400 --> 0:59:06.800 ours has to include way more. And that's what I'm saying. 0:59:06.920 --> 0:59:10.400 We're in a danger. Black murder is our campaign, and 0:59:10.520 --> 0:59:12.600 that's why we're gonna grab these young boys up. And 0:59:12.680 --> 0:59:15.800 that's why I'm raising kings And you know, I can't 0:59:15.840 --> 0:59:18.160 kill my brother because I love all of these things 0:59:18.200 --> 0:59:20.800 that we're going to implant in our kids and and 0:59:21.000 --> 0:59:24.120 retrain the culture to what it really looks like for 0:59:24.240 --> 0:59:27.080 success and unity. Man. So that's the next stages of 0:59:27.160 --> 0:59:29.760 what it is, man. So it was supposed to debate 0:59:29.800 --> 0:59:32.840 about Kevin Samuel. So what I'm challenging you to do 0:59:33.600 --> 0:59:36.920 is next week we should I think we have somebody 0:59:36.960 --> 0:59:39.520 booked for next week, so yeah, but we can figure 0:59:39.560 --> 0:59:43.640 it out next week if possible. I think that you 0:59:44.000 --> 0:59:49.120 should bring someone to the show, and I will try 0:59:49.200 --> 0:59:51.680 to bring someone. I don't know, but I'll try. So 0:59:51.840 --> 0:59:54.720 we could have a conversation about our brother. And I 0:59:54.840 --> 0:59:58.680 still call him my brother because I don't you know, 0:59:58.760 --> 1:00:01.040 I don't believe that people should be like, oh, I 1:00:01.080 --> 1:00:03.120 don't care if he died. That's that's too much for me. 1:00:03.320 --> 1:00:06.720 I would never do that. I thought Kevin Samuels at 1:00:06.760 --> 1:00:08.760 there were times when you're right, he did say some 1:00:08.880 --> 1:00:10.600 things that I was like, Okay, I can see that, 1:00:11.040 --> 1:00:14.840 but I just think the brand um that was associated 1:00:14.920 --> 1:00:18.760 with him, it was distorted and what you know, what 1:00:18.840 --> 1:00:21.760 it is what I what I learned. I've been playing 1:00:21.800 --> 1:00:25.840 sports my whole life, right, and you have different coaches, Right. 1:00:25.920 --> 1:00:28.000 You have coaches that pull you off the court and 1:00:28.040 --> 1:00:30.800 said you're playing like ship. You like you're playing like 1:00:30.840 --> 1:00:32.400 ship and you're gonna sit on the rest of the bench. 1:00:32.640 --> 1:00:36.520 You're bummed out of what you're You're too heavy, you're slow. 1:00:36.840 --> 1:00:39.360 I don't even know how you got to this team right. 1:00:39.480 --> 1:00:41.640 And it worked for certain people. There were certain people 1:00:41.960 --> 1:00:45.760 that elevated their game because that Minister of aericon will 1:00:45.800 --> 1:00:49.439 do yeah and it, and he called them every name 1:00:49.560 --> 1:00:53.360 possible in front of everybody, and they came back. And me, 1:00:53.560 --> 1:00:55.400 I was one of those people when you told me 1:00:55.560 --> 1:00:58.360 those negative things about me, it's I'm gonna show you that. 1:00:58.680 --> 1:01:00.440 I'm gonna show you I'm better than And I came 1:01:00.480 --> 1:01:03.480 back and I competed twenty times harder. And those are 1:01:03.520 --> 1:01:06.480 my favorite coaches. I didn't need the coach that made it. 1:01:06.840 --> 1:01:08.800 You know, hey, can you can do a little better? 1:01:09.040 --> 1:01:12.200 I'm not looking you know what I'm trying to tell 1:01:12.240 --> 1:01:14.240 you is That's what I'm trying to tell you. Kevin 1:01:14.320 --> 1:01:17.880 Samuels has a model that worked for some people. When 1:01:17.920 --> 1:01:20.080 he talked about black dudes, he said, okay, so why 1:01:20.080 --> 1:01:22.560 shouldn't you have a woman? You're fat, you don't make 1:01:22.640 --> 1:01:25.040 no money, you don't really look that good, Like do 1:01:25.160 --> 1:01:28.680 you have a big dick? It's probably small? Like what what? What? 1:01:28.840 --> 1:01:30.960 What can you offer a woman? Let's just be realistic, 1:01:32.800 --> 1:01:36.400 my I. You know, it's fine. We should debate the 1:01:36.520 --> 1:01:40.320 issue next week, because you know, I y'all told me 1:01:40.600 --> 1:01:44.320 that a black woman, a black man needs life spoken 1:01:44.440 --> 1:01:47.480 to him by a woman. You know, she needs to 1:01:47.520 --> 1:01:50.600 be built this woman, yeah, this woman. Yeah. Well, but 1:01:50.720 --> 1:01:53.960 you know, I'm just telling you that there were some 1:01:54.120 --> 1:01:57.080 times it didn't. It didn't, It didn't make me. It's 1:01:57.240 --> 1:01:59.600 for someone to tell me that as thirty. If I'm 1:01:59.680 --> 1:02:04.360 over already five, I'm leftovers that I get something. And 1:02:04.440 --> 1:02:06.400 I'm just trying to say, I could give you so 1:02:06.600 --> 1:02:08.800 many of those types of statements that but I can 1:02:08.880 --> 1:02:11.360 give you so many says that he did. He made 1:02:11.400 --> 1:02:15.480 that word like that, I don't think, so bring that. 1:02:15.680 --> 1:02:18.080 Let's bring that to the show. Let's do it next week. 1:02:18.360 --> 1:02:20.880 You know what I'm saying, so um, what I want 1:02:20.920 --> 1:02:23.040 to do is the way I want to end this 1:02:23.120 --> 1:02:25.200 show is usually an ending with my I don't get it. 1:02:30.640 --> 1:02:33.840 There's so many things I don't get this week, you know, 1:02:34.000 --> 1:02:37.800 after traveling to Ghana and traveling to Africa and just 1:02:38.040 --> 1:02:42.440 really just reflecting, Man, I really don't get how us 1:02:42.600 --> 1:02:47.080 as a people with so much greatness, so much power, 1:02:48.200 --> 1:02:54.560 so much ability, just don't get it right. I just 1:02:54.680 --> 1:02:57.200 don't get it. Like when when I when I'm traveling 1:02:57.680 --> 1:02:59.760 and I'm seeing I look at the power. When you 1:02:59.800 --> 1:03:05.120 look every field, Black people excel. They create everything, they 1:03:05.200 --> 1:03:08.720 come up with the ideas, They the best athletes. We 1:03:08.960 --> 1:03:12.000 all of these things, and we don't utilize that and 1:03:12.120 --> 1:03:15.600 put it together to become the superpowers and the gods 1:03:15.720 --> 1:03:18.800 and that we're supposed to be. I just don't. It's sad, 1:03:18.920 --> 1:03:23.000 but it's not us. It's really it's it is at 1:03:23.080 --> 1:03:27.200 this point because we should know better, but really we have. 1:03:28.240 --> 1:03:32.120 It took four hundred plus years to break us down 1:03:32.800 --> 1:03:35.600 and to create this thing where we can't work together 1:03:37.000 --> 1:03:39.840 or where we don't work as much together as we should. 1:03:40.000 --> 1:03:42.560 I mean, you you know, words are powerful. We can 1:03:42.720 --> 1:03:46.240 work together, and we do work together, but we don't 1:03:46.360 --> 1:03:49.840 do it as much as necessary to change the conditions 1:03:49.880 --> 1:03:52.360 to our people of our people. That's what I'm focusing 1:03:52.440 --> 1:03:55.919 on with these questions that I'm asking because I see 1:03:56.040 --> 1:03:58.760 us and we we we we we know how to 1:03:58.880 --> 1:04:05.000 argue one another. Damn built up because our kids are 1:04:05.120 --> 1:04:07.680 in the center of it. And I and I think 1:04:08.440 --> 1:04:11.800 that we have to recognize that this is being done 1:04:11.920 --> 1:04:16.160 to us on purpose. Our communities have been built and 1:04:16.280 --> 1:04:19.320 structured a certain way, and our relationships in a lot 1:04:19.360 --> 1:04:22.080 of ways have also been tampered with, so hopefully we 1:04:22.160 --> 1:04:25.880 can get that. It's so crazy, Like I watched all 1:04:26.200 --> 1:04:29.680 every like I've been really doing historical studies, and every 1:04:29.880 --> 1:04:33.880 person deemed as a leader who has taken on any 1:04:34.520 --> 1:04:36.560 you know, pressure to say hey, I'm gonna do something 1:04:36.600 --> 1:04:40.320 to change my people has been demonized and crucified by 1:04:40.480 --> 1:04:43.400 its own people. And I don't know how we got 1:04:43.560 --> 1:04:46.320 to that stage. It's it's it is the weirdest thing 1:04:46.440 --> 1:04:50.920 that I've ever seen. But you know, my purpose is different. 1:04:51.000 --> 1:04:53.800 So I'm gonna continue to move through the fire and 1:04:53.920 --> 1:04:56.240 take whatever comes with it, you know. So I'm gonna 1:04:56.280 --> 1:05:00.200 love my people despite my people or despite what we've 1:05:00.240 --> 1:05:04.000 been through, because we have to recognize the trauma. With 1:05:04.200 --> 1:05:08.120 that being said, I'm not gonna always be right. Jamika 1:05:08.160 --> 1:05:11.000 married is not gonna always be wrong. We both always 1:05:11.560 --> 1:05:13.920 and I mean always, be authemic.