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Speaker 1: Hey, this is jonnas is Sam your og Okay Storytime

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Speaker 1: podcast hosts. We have some great stories coming.

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Speaker 2: Up, but before that, we have a quick two minute

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Speaker 2: break from the sponsors that keep the show alive.

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Speaker 1: I refuse to give back my friends key to their

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Speaker 1: apartment after she cheated on her husband. You had us

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Speaker 1: in the first half there, it's my key now. I

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Speaker 1: became friends with a couple female twenty six and male

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Speaker 1: thirty one when they moved into the city about three

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Speaker 1: years ago. I met them together and I'm closer with

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Speaker 1: the wife, but also still friends with the husband. About

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Speaker 1: a year ago, the wife moved to another city for

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Speaker 1: her job, while the husband stayed behind to finish his masters.

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Speaker 1: By the way, this crowns from user Meet Entrepreneur two

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Speaker 1: ninety nine and if you want to submit your own stories,

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Speaker 1: go to our slash Okay. Storytime suppered it.

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Speaker 3: So.

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Speaker 1: I got a call from the wife in September. Do

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Speaker 1: you remember She was inconsolable and said that she had

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Speaker 1: a brief affair with someone but called it off because

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Speaker 1: she wanted to focus on her marriage. The affair partner

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Speaker 1: did not take it well, found the husband and told

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Speaker 1: them everything in painful detail, with screenshots and photo evidence.

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Speaker 1: The husband was obviously blindsided and devastated. There are still

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Speaker 1: in two separate states, and the husband has gotten low

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Speaker 1: to no contact with the wife, asking for space. She

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Speaker 1: had been incredibly emotional since this happened. I've been in

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Speaker 1: contact with her multiple times a day, even just to

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Speaker 1: check in and let her know she's loved and important.

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Speaker 1: But she's understandably been a mess. I've seen the husband

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Speaker 1: a few times. I let him know that the wife

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Speaker 1: told me what happened, and that I just wanted him

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Speaker 1: to know that I'm here if he needs anything. My

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Speaker 1: goal is just to be there for both of my

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Speaker 1: friends and not get in the middle. To me, it

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Speaker 1: comes down to some bad decisions that were made that

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Speaker 1: had really painful consequences. There's no villain in this story.

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Speaker 1: People are not the sum of their mistakes. Fast forward

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Speaker 1: to present day, where the wife was served with divorce papers.

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Speaker 1: She wants to talk to in person, but he doesn't.

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Speaker 1: He agreed to FaceTime only if they do speak. She

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Speaker 1: wants to fly here without telling her and show up

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Speaker 1: on his doorstep to fight for the marriage. They have

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Speaker 1: a door code to their apartment that they use every day.

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Speaker 1: They also have a key, which they gave me about

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Speaker 1: a year ago when I was watching their pets. When

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Speaker 1: I want to give it back to the husband, he said,

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Speaker 1: just to hang on to it. He let her know

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Speaker 1: that he has changed the code to the door, so

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Speaker 1: right now she has no physical way to get into

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Speaker 1: the apartment if he's not home. She's also concerned that

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Speaker 1: he won't let her in if he knows it's her,

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Speaker 1: which I don't think would be the case, but who knows.

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Speaker 1: She asked me to pick her up from the airport

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Speaker 1: and give her the key so that she can get in.

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Speaker 1: I said, I'm not really comfortable with it because I

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Speaker 1: don't want the husband to feel like I betrayed him

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Speaker 1: or was part of some sort of ambush. She's also

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Speaker 1: walking in at ten pm when he is not expecting anybody.

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Speaker 1: I'd be really spooked if it was me. He's former military,

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Speaker 1: but I just think it's not great to surprise anyone

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Speaker 1: that late. I know this sounds stupid, but I suggested

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Speaker 1: that if she ubers to the apartment he won't let

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Speaker 1: her in or isn't home, I can drive over. I'm

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Speaker 1: only fifteen minutes away. I can give her the key then,

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Speaker 1: but she said, no, she's on thead so she can

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Speaker 1: still legally enter the apartment. So I've red luckily agreed

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Speaker 1: to give her the key up front. So am I

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Speaker 1: the a hole to him if I give her the key?

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Speaker 1: Or am I the a hole to her if I

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Speaker 1: don't give it to her upfront? Remember I remember when

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Speaker 1: he said you didn't want to be in the middle

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Speaker 1: of this. You should have just been like, I don't

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Speaker 1: want to be a part of this. This is your mess.

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Speaker 1: Do not involve me.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, agreed, agreed, and just give her the key and

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Speaker 2: get out of it. I understand you want to be supportive.

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Speaker 2: They gotta work this out on your own, on their own.

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Speaker 2: Give them some space.

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Speaker 1: Edit one. I should have clarified that they were still

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Speaker 1: together when they gave me the key, which is part

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Speaker 1: of why I'm conflicted. She technically gave it to me

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Speaker 1: with him there. She had already moved for her job

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Speaker 1: when I went to give it back, and he told

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Speaker 1: me just to hang on to it. At it too.

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Speaker 1: This is a difficult situation because her mental health has

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Speaker 1: declined significantly since this all occurred. There have been episodes

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Speaker 1: where she was actually making a plan to self harm

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Speaker 1: and reached out to me. Oh boy. I was able

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Speaker 1: to coordinate with one of her friends there and convince

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Speaker 1: her to admit herself to the hospital for for a

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Speaker 1: forty eight hour hold. So her mental health has been

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Speaker 1: incredibly fragile. That doesn't excuse the choices that she made

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Speaker 1: in any way. During those episodes, she asked me to

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Speaker 1: reach out to her husband to tell them the state

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Speaker 1: she was in, and I told her no because I

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Speaker 1: felt like it was manipulative. That's good on you, yeah yeah,

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Speaker 1: oh yeah. I also felt like whether he responded or not,

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Speaker 1: it would impact her only negatively either way, and she

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Speaker 1: needed to work with her therapists to help her through this.

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Speaker 1: The support I've given her has been solely regarding her

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Speaker 1: mental health. I haven't engaged in any conversations with either

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Speaker 1: of them about the other. She has mostly invented to

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Speaker 1: me about her deep regret, remorse, guilt, and lack of

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Speaker 1: self worth because of the choices that she's made, and

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Speaker 1: as her friend, I really tried to support her as

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Speaker 1: a vulnerable human being by reminding her that we are

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Speaker 1: not the some of our mistakes and while this is

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Speaker 1: painful and has some deep consequences, she still has so

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Speaker 1: much to live for.

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Speaker 2: Okay, that's supportive. That's not bad. That's not bad.

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Speaker 1: Opiece is trying to be the most neutral and most

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Speaker 1: supportive person in both parties as she can be. I

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Speaker 1: get it. It's very hard. I say all this because

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Speaker 1: I'm seeing a lot of comments saying that I inserted

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Speaker 1: myself into the middle of this. But this is all

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Speaker 1: just happened today. She asked me for the key, and

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Speaker 1: I told her I wasn't comfortable with that for the

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Speaker 1: reason stated in my original post. She's obviously emotional, and again,

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Speaker 1: she is technically the one that gave me the key,

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Speaker 1: which is why I reluctantly agreed. But then I came

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Speaker 1: here because my conscience is telling me that it's not

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Speaker 1: the right decision, even though I feel like I'm trying

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Speaker 1: to bounce a sensitive situation which has been really intense.

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Speaker 1: Added three, Wow, what a jolt this has been in

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Speaker 1: a really short span of time. First, I do want

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Speaker 1: to say that I absolutely think the choices she made

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Speaker 1: were wrong. Okay, and so does she. She knows that

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Speaker 1: she fed up and has been torturing herself over it

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Speaker 1: in some really intense ways. I am absolutely not qualified

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Speaker 1: to help her navigate, but have tried to be supportive,

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Speaker 1: but have tried to be a supportive friend through it

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Speaker 1: because of the immediacy and severity of the help she

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Speaker 1: needed at the time. Thanks to everyone for the perspective.

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Speaker 1: I think I've been so worried about her emotional state

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Speaker 1: over the last few months that I've been too close

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Speaker 1: to it to see what some of you were saying,

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Speaker 1: and that she's being a bit manipulative with me, especially

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Speaker 1: when I told her I wasn't coomfortable giving her the key.

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Speaker 1: I'm going to call her tomorrow and let her know

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Speaker 1: that I'm not giving it to her.

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Speaker 2: Nice Okay, Okay, I.

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Speaker 1: Really appreciate the snap out of its slap. A lot

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Speaker 1: of you have provided update on the wife. Oh boy,

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Speaker 1: I let her know this morning that I wouldn't be

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Speaker 1: giving her the key, as many of you predicted. She

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Speaker 1: instantly responded with a complete vitriol. No discussion, no please

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Speaker 1: reconsent her, none of that, just straight to I can't

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Speaker 1: believe you right now. I can't rely on anyone. Thanks

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Speaker 1: a lot, fine, you will regret it. The last one

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Speaker 1: was a bit unexpected. I probably would have in shock

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Speaker 1: if I hadn't read the feedback on this post beforehand,

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Speaker 1: so I was honestly unfazed and just responded that I

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Speaker 1: don't support what she's trying to do, and, like a

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Speaker 1: few people mention, if roles were reversed and the husband

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Speaker 1: was asking me to do this, I would absolutely be

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Speaker 1: saying the same thing, and that she needs to respect

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Speaker 1: my decision because it wasn't going to change. Among other things,

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Speaker 1: she told me I was ruining everything. I let her

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Speaker 1: know that unfortunately she is the one that has ruined

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Speaker 1: everything with the decisions she's made in the past, and

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Speaker 1: it's time for her to start taking accountability and stop

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Speaker 1: looking for people to blame.

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Speaker 3: Mmooo.

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Speaker 1: I also told her that I would be giving the

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Speaker 1: keyback to the husband and letting him know what she

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Speaker 1: was planning. Nice. She lost it, lots of swearing, lots

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Speaker 1: of self pity, threats of self harm, and then said

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Speaker 1: I wasn't a good friend to her. That's when I

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Speaker 1: had enough. I told her I was done at being

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Speaker 1: that old twelving bag for her, and that I know

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Speaker 1: I've been a good friend to her when no one

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Speaker 1: else was supporting her. I saw her through some dark times.

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Speaker 1: I said her selfishness had finally crossed online with me.

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Speaker 1: And by the way, you can listen to stories just

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Speaker 1: like this on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, wherever you get your

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Speaker 1: podcasts at. Just search okay, story type and we'll be

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Speaker 1: right there.

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Speaker 2: Hey, let's get some claps in the chat for OPI

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Speaker 2: growing to backbone here for finally finding it and standing

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Speaker 2: on some business. Let's go.

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Speaker 1: And I love the accountability for your actions. You have

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Speaker 1: no one else to blame again but yourself. That's great,

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Speaker 1: It's good for you, OPI. What you need to do

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Speaker 1: is get your butt out of this mess. You don't

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Speaker 1: need to be in the middle of this. This is

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Speaker 1: not your problem. Heck, now you can support your friends.

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Speaker 1: But from Afar. From Afar, I ended it by saying

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Speaker 1: that she's in a dangerous state of mind and that

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Speaker 1: she should just reach out to her therapist and share

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Speaker 1: our conversation. Share our conversation so she can give her

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Speaker 1: an objective view of that. I let her know that

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Speaker 1: she needed help that I can no longer give, and

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Speaker 1: that I was done. She sent me two apology texts

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Speaker 1: about five minutes later, but I haven't responded and I

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Speaker 1: don't plan to. If she somehow shows up at my door,

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Speaker 1: if she flies in tomorrow, I won't be answering update

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Speaker 1: on the husband. Oh boy, we got together. I'm just kidding, oh,

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Speaker 1: because can you imagine. I let him know everything this morning.

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Speaker 1: We're good and I made plans to give him back

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Speaker 1: the key. She's supposed to fly in tomorrow night and

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Speaker 1: leave Saturday. He actually won't be He actually won't even

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Speaker 1: be in town this weekend. And that's the end of

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Speaker 1: that story. So she's flying in, she's flying in, and

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Speaker 1: there's nothing she can do right. That's why she should

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Speaker 1: have just go back to her other affair partner. She

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Speaker 1: should have told her husband, I'm coming to town, and

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Speaker 1: he would have been like, well, good luck, good luck.

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Speaker 1: What are you to do. You're flying in for nothing.

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Speaker 1: Good for up, get away from that. That's not your circus, circus.

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Speaker 1: That's like, yeah, that's not your circus to deal with. Sorry,

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Speaker 1: there's a lot of terms out there, but you did

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Speaker 1: the right thing. You were trying to be a good

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Speaker 1: friend of both of them. But at some point it's

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Speaker 1: not your problem.

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Speaker 2: It's not it really is not your problem at all. No,

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Speaker 2: my best friend uninviting me from her wedding. So I

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Speaker 2: canceled plans.

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Speaker 1: With her done. No wedding.

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Speaker 2: Yep, we can't go to brunch anymore, Martha, you won't

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Speaker 2: let me into wedding? Am I thirty eight female? The

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Speaker 2: a hole when I canceled plans with my best friend

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Speaker 2: forty one female and probably ruined a sixteen year friendship.

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Speaker 2: So this is crowding my mind for weeks, and I

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Speaker 2: still don't know what to do. By the way, this

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Speaker 2: comes from sufficient Seesaw nineteen on the r slash Okay

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Speaker 2: story Times self rut it, So let me start at

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Speaker 2: the beginning. I will try to make it as short

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Speaker 2: as possible, but I guess you need some info. English

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Speaker 2: isn't my first language. Since I was a kid, I've

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Speaker 2: always been bullied through preschool and high school. Even in

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Speaker 2: my first job, I was the chubby, introverted kid with

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Speaker 2: weird hair. The friends that I seem to have made

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Speaker 2: never turn out to be real friends, or they're just

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Speaker 2: bad friends. One stole my father. There's wallet to give

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Speaker 2: you an example. When I was eleven, my mother passed

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Speaker 2: of cancer, and after that things happened that also gave

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Speaker 2: me trust issues with my family and maybe decide I

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Speaker 2: couldn't trust anyone. I had to do things on my

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Speaker 2: own and certainly couldn't confide in anyone how I felt

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Speaker 2: because it seemed like no one seemed to care. At twelve,

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Speaker 2: I was already being an adult, cooking dinner for myself

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Speaker 2: and my three year old brother in cleaning the house

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Speaker 2: because my father had irregular shifts for work. For me,

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Speaker 2: it was normal, but I went from kid to adult

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Speaker 2: in a split second. At fifteen, I met my now husband. Yes,

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Speaker 2: he had a hard time with my trust issues, but

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Speaker 2: I am thirty eight now and we are still going strong.

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Speaker 2: My husband played sports when I met him and invited

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Speaker 2: me to join his team. It's a sport where a

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Speaker 2: male and females play on the same team. That's where

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Speaker 2: I met Emma. Volleyball has to be volleyball for some reason.

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Speaker 2: We connect immediately. At first, I was careful to share

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Speaker 2: things with her, but over time she became the person

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Speaker 2: I trusted the most besides my husband. We were texting

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Speaker 2: on a daily basis and would go to the movies,

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Speaker 2: weekly concerts, festivals, weekend trips, theme parks. We would crack

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Speaker 2: up over silly things and went on vacations with the

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Speaker 2: Xchargers and had each other's back through thick and thin

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Speaker 2: in the winter. She always suffered from winter depression, and

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Speaker 2: I always try to take her out and make sure

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Speaker 2: she was okay, as she did with me when I,

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Speaker 2: yet again was having a hard time at work. No

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Speaker 2: matter what happened, she was always there for me and

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Speaker 2: I was there for her, and we would tell each

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Speaker 2: other everything. She also had met her boyfriend at a

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Speaker 2: young age, and already we were together when I met her,

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Speaker 2: but he was a lot older than her and a

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Speaker 2: real introvert. The things she liked and wanted to do

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Speaker 2: never seemed to be the things he wanted. She would

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Speaker 2: like to see the world, not him. He wanted to pet,

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Speaker 2: not him. She wanted to go on dates, not him.

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Speaker 2: You get the picture, But somehow seemed to work for

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Speaker 2: both of them. They never got married and did not

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Speaker 2: have kids. We don't have kids as well, but we

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Speaker 2: got married and she was there with the bacheorette party

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Speaker 2: and the ceremony. She also did not fill the need

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Speaker 2: to meet up with me and my husband as a couple,

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Speaker 2: so in the sixteen year friendship, we only met up

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Speaker 2: as couples. Wants truth be told, my husband didn't mind

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Speaker 2: because they have no common interest. She always lived five

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Speaker 2: minutes away from me, but three years ago her husband

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Speaker 2: wanted to move to his forever home where he could

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Speaker 2: see himself grow old. They found a house an hour away.

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Speaker 2: At first, Emma didn't like it because it was far

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Speaker 2: away from everyone and everything, but he wrieled her into

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Speaker 2: it with the promise that she could have pets on

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Speaker 2: the large ground surrounding the house. So they moved in

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Speaker 2: and truth be told, the house was stunning. We didn't

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Speaker 2: see each other weekly anymore, but the friendship was still

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Speaker 2: going strong. However, their relationship was not. After some time,

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Speaker 2: Emma became lonely because it was just now becoming more

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Speaker 2: obvious that they didn't share many interests. She tried a

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Speaker 2: lot of things to get their relationship on a good level,

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Speaker 2: but it just didn't work. We talked for hours about it,

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Speaker 2: and I always listened and told her that she needed

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Speaker 2: to do what made her feel happy. I never judged

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Speaker 2: her when she went exploring what she wanted while also

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Speaker 2: going to therapy counseling, always saying you need to do

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Speaker 2: whatever makes you happy. This was obvious things wouldn't work

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Speaker 2: out between them, but they still had it. Broke off

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Speaker 2: the relationship, but At the end of the relationship, Emma

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Speaker 2: met her old neighbor and they hit it off immediately.

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Speaker 2: By old neighbor, I mean the neighbor of her parents.

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Speaker 2: He was an adult starting a family when she was

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Speaker 2: a young teenager when they lived next to each other.

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Speaker 2: He got his kids when Emma was still in her

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Speaker 2: teenage years. You can understand not everyone is open minded,

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Speaker 2: and I have had to defend her choice to date

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Speaker 2: yet again an older man. I just hope this old

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Speaker 2: guy is a better fit than this other dude.

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Speaker 1: I think the old guy's fine, Am I right?

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Speaker 2: So we don't know yet get kids and with neighbors

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Speaker 2: with her parents, Yeah, who telling people that it's up

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Speaker 2: to her who she dates. Again, I didn't judge her

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Speaker 2: as long as she was happy. I was happy. She

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Speaker 2: ended the relationship and moved back to town next to me.

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Speaker 2: That's when things started to change. I told her if

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Speaker 2: she needed help moving or painting, that I would be

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Speaker 2: happy to help. You'd never asked for my help. Our

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Speaker 2: normal daily contact was gone, but I thought she was

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Speaker 2: busy with moving That's okay. But after three weeks of

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Speaker 2: not hearing anything, I became concerned and literally asked her

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Speaker 2: I'm worried. Are you okay? She takes it back that

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00:15:51,280 --> 00:15:54,160
Speaker 2: she was fine, just busy and tired. Again. I told

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Speaker 2: her if she needed help, she could ask me, but

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Speaker 2: that wasn't necessary her parents were helping her and her

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Speaker 2: new boyfriend. I let it be and went to visit

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Speaker 2: to look at her new house. Her new boyfriend was

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Speaker 2: there as well, and we had some small talk, nothing weird,

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Speaker 2: but the contact became less frequent. She texted me once

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Speaker 2: in three weeks. At first, I texted her right back,

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00:16:18,080 --> 00:16:20,480
Speaker 2: happy to hear from her, but after several times of

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Speaker 2: not getting a response back within the days but weeks,

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00:16:23,160 --> 00:16:27,480
Speaker 2: I stopped texting right right back away as well. I

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00:16:27,520 --> 00:16:31,960
Speaker 2: was disappointed, but thought, she has a new house, new relationship,

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Speaker 2: she's on cloud nine. She'll come back.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, that makes sense. You can give her some time

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Speaker 1: and space, let her do a thing. She'll reach out.

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Speaker 1: She didn't, Oh, never mind.

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Speaker 2: Whenever I asked if we could meet, she said she

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Speaker 2: had plans or she was tired because it turned out

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Speaker 2: that her thyroid didn't work properly. So eventually I told her,

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Speaker 2: you let me know when you want to meet up,

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00:16:52,440 --> 00:16:55,760
Speaker 2: because I don't know when. She's too tired. We met

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Speaker 2: up for the first time after.

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Speaker 1: Six after moving back to the town, and this sucks.

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Speaker 2: For OP because this is like her only friend that

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Speaker 2: she's had her whole life.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, and I think I think this is also on

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Speaker 1: OP here because OPS like friend, this is my friend,

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Speaker 1: Like I want to hang out, I want to hang out,

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Speaker 1: I want to I want to do Yeah, I don't.

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Speaker 2: I don't think so. I think she just was like,

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Speaker 2: you know, you used to everything was cool and chill,

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Speaker 2: but after she got with this new guy, something changed.

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Speaker 1: She's probably just you know, laying really low. And I

358
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Speaker 1: know you have a support system, and one of your

359
00:17:27,160 --> 00:17:29,160
Speaker 1: best support systems is friends and the ones I care

360
00:17:29,160 --> 00:17:32,879
Speaker 1: about you. But sometimes you just need to just really

361
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Speaker 1: lay low. And I get that you just need to

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Speaker 1: just have your own time and have your own space.

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Speaker 1: It takes some time. If she's if Emma committed, I mean,

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Speaker 1: if Emma communicated that, that's fine. But the thing is

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Speaker 1: she never did. She's like, it's fine, it's fine, it's fine.

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Speaker 1: So I feel bad for OP, but I know OPP

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Speaker 1: was trying to do the right thing.

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Speaker 2: We met for the first time after six months. Everything

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00:17:51,840 --> 00:17:54,520
Speaker 2: was normal, and I noticed she had a sparkling ring

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Speaker 2: around her finger, so I immediately asked if he popped

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Speaker 2: the question. She admitted that he did, but no one

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00:18:01,480 --> 00:18:03,920
Speaker 2: knew it because it was going fast. I was so

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Speaker 2: happy for her. We talked about the wedding. She told

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Speaker 2: me that she didn't want a wedding dress because it

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Speaker 2: would be a small wedding. I respected her decision, but

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00:18:11,920 --> 00:18:14,800
Speaker 2: felt a bit disappointed as well because we had talked

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00:18:14,840 --> 00:18:17,800
Speaker 2: about making an appointment for fun about wedding dresses a

378
00:18:17,800 --> 00:18:21,439
Speaker 2: few years prior. Because she would possibly never wear one,

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00:18:21,480 --> 00:18:25,320
Speaker 2: the contact still dramatically decreased, where at one point I

380
00:18:25,480 --> 00:18:28,560
Speaker 2: just became fed up with it, but I never showed

381
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Speaker 2: or told her. We did meet again after that, and

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Speaker 2: she said maybe we can meet up as a couple.

383
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Speaker 2: I told her I would ask my husband, so I did,

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Speaker 2: and he said that now was not a good time

385
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Speaker 2: for him. And I do understand he got a promotion

386
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Speaker 2: and works fifty hours a week and just wants to

387
00:18:44,840 --> 00:18:48,199
Speaker 2: unwind when he's home and not meet new people. So

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00:18:48,240 --> 00:18:50,320
Speaker 2: I let her know, and her reaction was not what

389
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Speaker 2: I expected. She shut me down when I tried to

390
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Speaker 2: explain and told me we should talk about it again

391
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Speaker 2: in person. I agreed, also wanting to talk about the

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Speaker 2: lack of response. So we met up and in the

393
00:19:03,680 --> 00:19:06,639
Speaker 2: first hour all is good and friendly. Then she said,

394
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Speaker 2: out of the blue, I bought my wedding dress. I

395
00:19:09,680 --> 00:19:11,800
Speaker 2: was kind of hurt knowing she went shopping for a

396
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Speaker 2: dress without me, but okay. Then she said, because you

397
00:19:15,960 --> 00:19:17,919
Speaker 2: and your husband didn't want to meet up with us

398
00:19:17,960 --> 00:19:20,520
Speaker 2: as a couple, you're both not invited to the wedding.

399
00:19:21,320 --> 00:19:26,320
Speaker 2: I was flabbergasted. What do what do do do?

400
00:19:26,320 --> 00:19:26,439
Speaker 1: Do?

401
00:19:26,440 --> 00:19:26,600
Speaker 3: Do?

402
00:19:26,600 --> 00:19:27,760
Speaker 2: Do do? Do? Dude?

403
00:19:28,359 --> 00:19:28,479
Speaker 3: Oh?

404
00:19:28,560 --> 00:19:31,320
Speaker 2: P your friend not Opie's husband.

405
00:19:31,880 --> 00:19:37,000
Speaker 1: What And also like it's now on your terms, like

406
00:19:37,160 --> 00:19:40,920
Speaker 1: just like that because of just one one little blip.

407
00:19:41,240 --> 00:19:44,080
Speaker 2: I think she was finding excuse. She's like, how can

408
00:19:44,119 --> 00:19:44,879
Speaker 2: I get this woman to.

409
00:19:44,960 --> 00:19:48,400
Speaker 1: Not know something? That something must have something must have happened.

410
00:19:48,760 --> 00:19:51,360
Speaker 1: It's not between I think with Emma, not with op

411
00:19:51,520 --> 00:19:53,520
Speaker 1: but like something must have just like clicked with Emma,

412
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Speaker 1: and something's not going right.

413
00:19:55,520 --> 00:19:58,119
Speaker 2: She explained that they don't want people on their wedding

414
00:19:58,200 --> 00:20:00,919
Speaker 2: that they feel uncomfortable with, and since we didn't want

415
00:20:00,960 --> 00:20:03,399
Speaker 2: to meet up with her, her boyfriend feels uncomfortable and

416
00:20:03,440 --> 00:20:07,399
Speaker 2: rejected by us. Therefore we're not invited. I agree, you

417
00:20:07,400 --> 00:20:09,280
Speaker 2: should not have people in your wedding you don't feel

418
00:20:09,280 --> 00:20:12,080
Speaker 2: comfortable with. But if it was But if it were me,

419
00:20:12,680 --> 00:20:15,680
Speaker 2: I would have told him, well, tough luck. We'll meet

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00:20:15,720 --> 00:20:18,400
Speaker 2: with my friend alone because I'm not inviting my best

421
00:20:18,400 --> 00:20:21,440
Speaker 2: friend of sixteen years. She said she felt weird only

422
00:20:21,480 --> 00:20:24,200
Speaker 2: a meeting with me to get to know me, so

423
00:20:24,480 --> 00:20:27,199
Speaker 2: that was not an option. So that was it, and

424
00:20:27,240 --> 00:20:30,560
Speaker 2: I had to respect their choice. She also didn't want

425
00:20:30,600 --> 00:20:33,440
Speaker 2: some of his friends on their wedding, and he agreed

426
00:20:33,560 --> 00:20:35,760
Speaker 2: with that as well, and it would be a small

427
00:20:35,800 --> 00:20:39,840
Speaker 2: wedding anyways, just twelve people only the reception and dinner.

428
00:20:40,480 --> 00:20:43,120
Speaker 2: I told her that I didn't have words for it,

429
00:20:43,560 --> 00:20:46,080
Speaker 2: and that I also felt rejected by her. New boyfriend

430
00:20:46,720 --> 00:20:49,600
Speaker 2: also made no sense to me that he would feel

431
00:20:49,640 --> 00:20:52,680
Speaker 2: comfortable enough with me and my husband after one meetup

432
00:20:52,720 --> 00:20:56,159
Speaker 2: to invite us to the wedding. Felt like a stupid excuse.

433
00:20:56,720 --> 00:21:00,000
Speaker 1: Yeah, you called it, but that's the small wedding. Of course,

434
00:21:00,000 --> 00:21:01,760
Speaker 1: she don't want to invite anyone that makes you uncomfortable

435
00:21:01,760 --> 00:21:04,240
Speaker 1: to your wedding. That's your wedding, your rules, your choice.

436
00:21:04,440 --> 00:21:08,439
Speaker 1: But you just needed one one meetup. Do you like

437
00:21:08,440 --> 00:21:09,679
Speaker 1: all right, they made the cut.

438
00:21:09,880 --> 00:21:12,760
Speaker 2: I think I think there's I think Emma has something

439
00:21:12,800 --> 00:21:16,320
Speaker 2: against Opie and she's just taken around.

440
00:21:16,480 --> 00:21:20,760
Speaker 1: It's either that or the new boyfriend soon to be

441
00:21:20,920 --> 00:21:26,280
Speaker 1: husband is extremely controlling. M That's what I'm getting at,

442
00:21:26,400 --> 00:21:28,880
Speaker 1: because she's like, I met this new guy. I can't

443
00:21:28,880 --> 00:21:30,840
Speaker 1: talk to you, like I'm just doing all my doing

444
00:21:30,840 --> 00:21:33,720
Speaker 1: my thing, and I think that's what's going on here.

445
00:21:34,080 --> 00:21:36,600
Speaker 2: Then we went to the point of less contact. She

446
00:21:36,720 --> 00:21:38,800
Speaker 2: told me that she was very disappointed that I didn't

447
00:21:38,800 --> 00:21:41,719
Speaker 2: help her move and help paint her house, excuse me

448
00:21:41,760 --> 00:21:43,439
Speaker 2: that I didn't come visit her that much in her

449
00:21:43,480 --> 00:21:46,920
Speaker 2: new house, and also lack of response to message her back.

450
00:21:47,240 --> 00:21:50,080
Speaker 2: I couldn't believe what she said. I seriously began to

451
00:21:50,160 --> 00:21:53,080
Speaker 2: doubt myself and told her that I did ask her

452
00:21:53,080 --> 00:21:55,920
Speaker 2: several times if she needed help, and yes, a few

453
00:21:55,960 --> 00:22:00,360
Speaker 2: months I did react immediately after a new text, but

454
00:22:00,400 --> 00:22:04,840
Speaker 2: that was a reaction on her lack of response. She

455
00:22:04,960 --> 00:22:08,400
Speaker 2: said that it was both of us then, that we

456
00:22:08,480 --> 00:22:11,280
Speaker 2: needed both to put more effort in our friendship.

457
00:22:11,320 --> 00:22:13,480
Speaker 1: All right, I'm done, I'm done.

458
00:22:13,640 --> 00:22:16,840
Speaker 2: I agreed. Maybe I had become a bit bitter and

459
00:22:16,920 --> 00:22:20,880
Speaker 2: needed to do my best more no, but we weren't finished.

460
00:22:22,040 --> 00:22:24,440
Speaker 2: Told me that we couldn't have the friendship we had

461
00:22:24,440 --> 00:22:26,119
Speaker 2: as before because of her thyroid.

462
00:22:26,280 --> 00:22:29,280
Speaker 1: This styroid is ruining our friendship. This styroid was the

463
00:22:29,359 --> 00:22:32,840
Speaker 1: last straw, because we cannot be friends because of my thyroid.

464
00:22:33,720 --> 00:22:37,040
Speaker 2: Ah. She was frustrated that I was still asking her

465
00:22:37,080 --> 00:22:40,199
Speaker 2: to come to the movies, theme parks, and concerts. She

466
00:22:40,400 --> 00:22:43,320
Speaker 2: says she can't do that anymore. Yet she does go

467
00:22:43,400 --> 00:22:46,159
Speaker 2: to the movies and other activities with her boyfriend and

468
00:22:46,240 --> 00:22:50,760
Speaker 2: other people like his adult children. She told me she

469
00:22:50,800 --> 00:22:53,640
Speaker 2: went out with two knights in a row. One included

470
00:22:53,880 --> 00:22:56,760
Speaker 2: even ice skating, So again, not sure how to react.

471
00:22:56,880 --> 00:22:59,400
Speaker 2: She never told me that she couldn't do those things anymore,

472
00:23:00,080 --> 00:23:03,000
Speaker 2: that she was just tired. If I had known, I

473
00:23:03,000 --> 00:23:05,760
Speaker 2: would have not suggested to go out and you and

474
00:23:05,920 --> 00:23:09,399
Speaker 2: would have suggested a movie night in with snacks or

475
00:23:09,440 --> 00:23:13,200
Speaker 2: something that costs less energy. I know more people have

476
00:23:13,400 --> 00:23:17,240
Speaker 2: problems with their thyroid, but they live their lives and

477
00:23:17,280 --> 00:23:20,720
Speaker 2: they're okay. My brain was fried at that moment. Hears

478
00:23:20,760 --> 00:23:23,200
Speaker 2: streaming down my face and I think I was in

479
00:23:23,320 --> 00:23:27,000
Speaker 2: sort of a shock because I could not stop trembling.

480
00:23:27,560 --> 00:23:30,280
Speaker 2: She told me that she changed as a person and

481
00:23:30,320 --> 00:23:32,200
Speaker 2: that she'd learned to stand up for herself.

482
00:23:32,400 --> 00:23:34,920
Speaker 1: What do you do this? This is weird?

483
00:23:34,960 --> 00:23:37,439
Speaker 2: And that she's right, she did change. I'm happy for

484
00:23:37,480 --> 00:23:40,520
Speaker 2: her that she found her voice, but I don't think

485
00:23:40,600 --> 00:23:43,200
Speaker 2: I deserve to be treated that way after all these years.

486
00:23:43,560 --> 00:23:46,520
Speaker 2: And to be honest, I don't recognize my friend anymore.

487
00:23:46,760 --> 00:23:49,800
Speaker 2: She feels nothing like that person I can tell anything

488
00:23:49,840 --> 00:23:53,640
Speaker 2: to anymore. After that, we parted ways and she gave

489
00:23:53,680 --> 00:23:56,880
Speaker 2: me a hug, telling me again that we both needed

490
00:23:56,880 --> 00:23:59,080
Speaker 2: to work on this friendship. And let that sink in.

491
00:23:59,280 --> 00:24:01,680
Speaker 1: What friendship knows there's no more friendship. You just ended

492
00:24:01,680 --> 00:24:02,240
Speaker 1: the friendship.

493
00:24:02,920 --> 00:24:05,399
Speaker 2: I would like to hear from endless side what the

494
00:24:05,400 --> 00:24:08,040
Speaker 2: heck is going on? Because one we're either missing a

495
00:24:08,040 --> 00:24:11,639
Speaker 2: lot of context or two she is totally not on

496
00:24:11,680 --> 00:24:12,240
Speaker 2: this planet.

497
00:24:12,359 --> 00:24:13,159
Speaker 1: No, you don't need that.

498
00:24:13,240 --> 00:24:14,960
Speaker 2: I'm out, get out, Get out.

499
00:24:15,680 --> 00:24:18,400
Speaker 1: Sixteen years of friendship. I mean, hey, that happens. Your

500
00:24:18,400 --> 00:24:20,760
Speaker 1: friends for so long and you like are literally two

501
00:24:20,800 --> 00:24:23,560
Speaker 1: peas in a pod. It does happen. People do change,

502
00:24:23,600 --> 00:24:25,760
Speaker 1: and why Opie said like, oh, he's like, I'm happy

503
00:24:25,760 --> 00:24:28,040
Speaker 1: for her. It sucks, but I can't change that. And

504
00:24:28,080 --> 00:24:31,600
Speaker 1: you know, I'll let you be, I'm the same me, UBU.

505
00:24:32,240 --> 00:24:35,000
Speaker 2: I drove home and sat on the couch. My husband

506
00:24:35,040 --> 00:24:37,719
Speaker 2: asked how it went, and I broke down. Last time

507
00:24:37,800 --> 00:24:41,280
Speaker 2: I cried so uncontrollably was when my mother passed. Emma

508
00:24:41,359 --> 00:24:43,760
Speaker 2: kept telling me through our conversations that she didn't want

509
00:24:43,760 --> 00:24:46,120
Speaker 2: to hurt me, but she did hurt me so much more,

510
00:24:46,520 --> 00:24:49,880
Speaker 2: and I think she ever could understand. It's been weeks

511
00:24:49,920 --> 00:24:52,560
Speaker 2: since we had this conversation. I lost over twenty two

512
00:24:52,600 --> 00:24:56,600
Speaker 2: pounds because I felt like crap, and I'm constantly emotional

513
00:24:57,240 --> 00:25:00,440
Speaker 2: racking my brain. If I'm indeed in that bad friend,

514
00:25:01,080 --> 00:25:05,600
Speaker 2: what I could have done different. Wilson also feels really

515
00:25:05,640 --> 00:25:08,280
Speaker 2: bad because if he would have agreed to meet with them,

516
00:25:08,440 --> 00:25:10,720
Speaker 2: this would have not happened. This is not your fault, guys.

517
00:25:10,960 --> 00:25:13,600
Speaker 2: I don't blame my husband for one second, though this

518
00:25:13,680 --> 00:25:17,639
Speaker 2: would have happened anyways. I also told him he didn't

519
00:25:17,680 --> 00:25:20,200
Speaker 2: need to feel obligated to meet up with someone who

520
00:25:20,200 --> 00:25:23,040
Speaker 2: didn't show interest in him for sixteen years, but now

521
00:25:23,080 --> 00:25:26,000
Speaker 2: because of her new boyfriend, he needs to be interested

522
00:25:26,000 --> 00:25:29,320
Speaker 2: as well. That's not how it works. A few days

523
00:25:29,320 --> 00:25:32,119
Speaker 2: after that evening, she texted me asking how I was

524
00:25:32,240 --> 00:25:34,120
Speaker 2: and asking if I wanted to see her new home

525
00:25:34,480 --> 00:25:37,439
Speaker 2: she recently moved in with her new boyfriend. I'm happy

526
00:25:37,440 --> 00:25:39,560
Speaker 2: to hear from her. I said yes, And you should

527
00:25:39,600 --> 00:25:42,920
Speaker 2: say yes to listening to more stories just like this. Yeah,

528
00:25:42,920 --> 00:25:46,160
Speaker 2: on your favorite freaking podcast platforms. Just search up Okay,

529
00:25:46,200 --> 00:25:49,280
Speaker 2: storytime on Spotify, Apple podcasts, wherever you listen to them.

530
00:25:49,640 --> 00:25:51,159
Speaker 2: We have stories just like this.

531
00:25:51,160 --> 00:25:54,320
Speaker 1: This is also so much that if I were op,

532
00:25:54,440 --> 00:25:57,800
Speaker 1: I'm like, I'm mentally fried, and yeah, sure I care

533
00:25:57,920 --> 00:26:01,679
Speaker 1: for you, but I'm just tied. I now I'm the

534
00:26:01,760 --> 00:26:07,680
Speaker 1: tired one. I guess just to keep on your toes ope,

535
00:26:07,800 --> 00:26:09,520
Speaker 1: and we'll see what happens when you go to her

536
00:26:09,600 --> 00:26:13,600
Speaker 1: new place. But you have your best friend, yeah, your husband.

537
00:26:13,880 --> 00:26:15,920
Speaker 1: It's great. You can make new friends. It's never too old.

538
00:26:15,920 --> 00:26:17,680
Speaker 1: You're never too old to make new friends and meet

539
00:26:17,720 --> 00:26:21,000
Speaker 1: new people. I know you want to maintain this relationship

540
00:26:21,040 --> 00:26:25,120
Speaker 1: because it's your oldest one, but sometimes it's just there's

541
00:26:25,160 --> 00:26:26,920
Speaker 1: nothing left to squeeze out of it. Yeah.

542
00:26:27,240 --> 00:26:31,040
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's time to throw this limon away now. After

543
00:26:31,080 --> 00:26:34,159
Speaker 2: thanking everything through, I'm not sure what to do. Everything

544
00:26:34,240 --> 00:26:36,840
Speaker 2: shifted between us to the point I think that things

545
00:26:36,880 --> 00:26:39,639
Speaker 2: will be weird. And also her boyfriend will be there

546
00:26:39,680 --> 00:26:43,199
Speaker 2: as well because it's his house. Maybe I'm petty he

547
00:26:43,280 --> 00:26:45,640
Speaker 2: voted against me to come to their wedding because he

548
00:26:45,920 --> 00:26:47,840
Speaker 2: didn't want to get to know me as a person

549
00:26:48,200 --> 00:26:51,200
Speaker 2: without my husband, and she didn't do anything to defend

550
00:26:51,359 --> 00:26:54,360
Speaker 2: or fight for me and her friendship. So now I'm

551
00:26:54,480 --> 00:26:57,760
Speaker 2: actually don't have any interesting getting to know him as well.

552
00:26:58,119 --> 00:26:59,760
Speaker 2: I'm not sure if I want to be in her

553
00:26:59,800 --> 00:27:03,320
Speaker 2: life anymore, because do you belong in someone's life when

554
00:27:03,320 --> 00:27:05,640
Speaker 2: you didn't invite them to your supposed to be best

555
00:27:05,680 --> 00:27:08,760
Speaker 2: friend to something as important as your wedding? So am

556
00:27:08,760 --> 00:27:11,360
Speaker 2: I the ahole if I cancel plans and probably ruin

557
00:27:11,440 --> 00:27:13,600
Speaker 2: my friendship when I tell her the reason I don't

558
00:27:13,640 --> 00:27:16,040
Speaker 2: want to meet up. Oh no, you know have boundaries.

559
00:27:16,080 --> 00:27:20,000
Speaker 2: You have found boundaries, and this should be reverse. Yeah,

560
00:27:20,080 --> 00:27:22,840
Speaker 2: you should have sat where Emma was sitting, switched seats

561
00:27:22,880 --> 00:27:24,560
Speaker 2: and said what Emma said to her.

562
00:27:25,000 --> 00:27:26,840
Speaker 1: She should have been the one crying. You should have

563
00:27:27,920 --> 00:27:32,960
Speaker 1: I think she should have definitely reached out and stopped

564
00:27:32,960 --> 00:27:36,600
Speaker 1: playing the blame game. Yeah, just so exhausting. You put

565
00:27:36,680 --> 00:27:40,159
Speaker 1: so much effort into something and then you stopped pushing

566
00:27:40,200 --> 00:27:43,159
Speaker 1: on that door and that door opens up and like

567
00:27:43,480 --> 00:27:48,040
Speaker 1: it's all your fault. That's crazy. Hey, it's Sam, I'm

568
00:27:48,040 --> 00:27:49,960
Speaker 1: your og host. Here bring to get back to the stories.

569
00:27:49,960 --> 00:27:51,639
Speaker 1: But here's three minutes bads from our sponsor.

570
00:27:52,240 --> 00:27:55,240
Speaker 3: My mother in law always complains about my gifts, so

571
00:27:55,320 --> 00:27:58,880
Speaker 3: I stopped giving her any boo. I mean, yeah, I yes,

572
00:27:58,960 --> 00:28:02,840
Speaker 3: thank you, or you don't get a freaking gift. Yeah,

573
00:28:02,880 --> 00:28:05,200
Speaker 3: that was good. I'm not getting my partner's side of

574
00:28:05,200 --> 00:28:08,919
Speaker 3: the family anything for Christmas, and his mom is furious

575
00:28:09,240 --> 00:28:11,960
Speaker 3: and I'm enjoying the drama. My partner, twenty four Mail

576
00:28:12,040 --> 00:28:15,480
Speaker 3: and I twenty three Mail, have been together for three years.

577
00:28:15,640 --> 00:28:17,600
Speaker 3: For the first two years we went to his family's

578
00:28:17,600 --> 00:28:19,840
Speaker 3: house for Christmas. Me and his mom didn't hit it

579
00:28:19,880 --> 00:28:22,280
Speaker 3: off well when we met. I'm not sure what happened,

580
00:28:22,280 --> 00:28:24,760
Speaker 3: but she immediately didn't like me. By the way, this

581
00:28:24,840 --> 00:28:27,600
Speaker 3: comes from phobia account and the art slash Showay story

582
00:28:27,600 --> 00:28:30,439
Speaker 3: time separate it too. We didn't see her much after

583
00:28:30,480 --> 00:28:32,720
Speaker 3: the first meeting, though, so I never really had a

584
00:28:32,800 --> 00:28:35,600
Speaker 3: chance to make it up to her until Christmas. I

585
00:28:35,600 --> 00:28:37,879
Speaker 3: didn't know her well, so I found what I thought

586
00:28:37,960 --> 00:28:40,560
Speaker 3: was a pretty minimalist necklace with green agate. It was

587
00:28:40,760 --> 00:28:43,040
Speaker 3: just the right shade to be what my partner said

588
00:28:43,200 --> 00:28:46,200
Speaker 3: was her favorite color. I thought she liked it at first,

589
00:28:46,320 --> 00:28:48,440
Speaker 3: until later on in the year after I met up

590
00:28:48,480 --> 00:28:50,520
Speaker 3: with his family and saw her niece wearing it. I

591
00:28:50,560 --> 00:28:53,000
Speaker 3: asked where she got it from, and she told me

592
00:28:53,080 --> 00:28:55,719
Speaker 3: my partner's mom was just going to throw it away.

593
00:28:56,000 --> 00:28:58,600
Speaker 3: That's freaking messed up. Throw it away. Why would you

594
00:28:58,680 --> 00:29:01,320
Speaker 3: throw it away? Not even a like, not even well,

595
00:29:01,360 --> 00:29:03,480
Speaker 3: it seems like she did regift it, but like, come on,

596
00:29:03,680 --> 00:29:06,320
Speaker 3: just keep it in your jewelry box. Yeah, throwing it

597
00:29:06,360 --> 00:29:09,480
Speaker 3: away is like it's it's not saying oh I don't

598
00:29:09,560 --> 00:29:11,280
Speaker 3: like it, it's saying I freaking hate the person who

599
00:29:11,360 --> 00:29:13,680
Speaker 3: gave it to me. Yeah, it's personal. I was a

600
00:29:13,680 --> 00:29:16,520
Speaker 3: little pissed but didn't say anything. It cost me one

601
00:29:16,560 --> 00:29:19,440
Speaker 3: hundred dollars, which isn't super expensive for some people. This

602
00:29:19,480 --> 00:29:21,560
Speaker 3: is a pressI for me, but as someone who lives

603
00:29:21,560 --> 00:29:24,320
Speaker 3: paycheck to paycheck, it kind of My partner asked his

604
00:29:24,360 --> 00:29:26,640
Speaker 3: mom why she wanted to throw it away, and she

605
00:29:26,680 --> 00:29:29,640
Speaker 3: said she just wouldn't have worn it. Fine, whatever, Maybe

606
00:29:29,680 --> 00:29:31,600
Speaker 3: I got her style wrong. It was her gift and

607
00:29:31,640 --> 00:29:33,280
Speaker 3: she could do what she wanted with it. I guess

608
00:29:33,480 --> 00:29:35,760
Speaker 3: she gave me an iron maidenshirt that year that was

609
00:29:35,800 --> 00:29:38,400
Speaker 3: way too small and an odd choice because if you

610
00:29:38,440 --> 00:29:41,120
Speaker 3: saw me, your first thought would not be metal head.

611
00:29:41,240 --> 00:29:43,840
Speaker 3: I wear overalls and a lot of cottage core clothing

612
00:29:43,840 --> 00:29:45,880
Speaker 3: because it's cute. So it's not like she put a

613
00:29:45,920 --> 00:29:47,960
Speaker 3: ton of effort into my gift and was upset. I

614
00:29:47,960 --> 00:29:50,560
Speaker 3: didn't put in as much. So for the second Christmas,

615
00:29:50,600 --> 00:29:52,440
Speaker 3: I put an effort to get to know her beforehand.

616
00:29:52,480 --> 00:29:54,960
Speaker 3: I talked to her sister, my partner's auntie, and found

617
00:29:55,000 --> 00:29:57,080
Speaker 3: out she grew up in the same hometown as me

618
00:29:57,160 --> 00:29:59,040
Speaker 3: and she missed it a lot, but because it was

619
00:29:59,080 --> 00:30:01,400
Speaker 3: a ten hour drive away, it wasn't somewhere she could

620
00:30:01,480 --> 00:30:03,480
Speaker 3: visit easily. I brought this up to our next time

621
00:30:03,520 --> 00:30:05,240
Speaker 3: we met, and she and I talked about the town

622
00:30:05,280 --> 00:30:07,840
Speaker 3: and started to get along more. In particular, though she

623
00:30:07,920 --> 00:30:10,040
Speaker 3: mentioned how much he missed the smell of our town.

624
00:30:10,080 --> 00:30:12,880
Speaker 3: There was a macadamia farm next to a bourbon distillery

625
00:30:13,000 --> 00:30:15,960
Speaker 3: that smelled really nice together because of the molasses, and

626
00:30:16,000 --> 00:30:19,120
Speaker 3: the beach nearby was surrounded by eucalyptus and wattles and

627
00:30:19,200 --> 00:30:22,120
Speaker 3: always smelled amazing. That sounds great, Yeah, that.

628
00:30:22,040 --> 00:30:24,080
Speaker 4: Sounds really cool. I would never think of a place

629
00:30:24,120 --> 00:30:25,160
Speaker 4: having a certain smell.

630
00:30:25,400 --> 00:30:27,680
Speaker 3: Yeah, but if it has all that, then yeah, I

631
00:30:28,040 --> 00:30:28,400
Speaker 3: miss that.

632
00:30:28,560 --> 00:30:31,520
Speaker 2: I will tell you the sawmill does have a certain smell.

633
00:30:32,000 --> 00:30:33,320
Speaker 3: Smells a list would dust.

634
00:30:33,600 --> 00:30:38,440
Speaker 2: Also, the backside of a dog shelter has a certain smell.

635
00:30:38,520 --> 00:30:41,200
Speaker 3: Oh, sounds like a bad smell. I had again what

636
00:30:41,280 --> 00:30:43,840
Speaker 3: I thought was a great idea. I have a friend

637
00:30:43,880 --> 00:30:46,960
Speaker 3: who makes candles, so I commissioned two custom candles, a

638
00:30:47,000 --> 00:30:50,680
Speaker 3: macadamia whiskey and vanilla candle and a salt eucalyptus and

639
00:30:50,760 --> 00:30:53,920
Speaker 3: wattle candle. I was so excited for her to open

640
00:30:53,960 --> 00:30:56,240
Speaker 3: them on Christmas, and when she just said, oh, that's

641
00:30:56,320 --> 00:31:00,400
Speaker 3: meat and put them aside. What what? I'm sorry someone

642
00:31:00,480 --> 00:31:03,320
Speaker 3: if I get I spent like a lot of effort

643
00:31:03,400 --> 00:31:06,440
Speaker 3: into that and someone just freaking went, oh, okay, you

644
00:31:06,480 --> 00:31:10,600
Speaker 3: got a custom meets, come on, come on. Thankfully for

645
00:31:10,680 --> 00:31:13,440
Speaker 3: my ego, her sister was way more excited about them

646
00:31:13,480 --> 00:31:15,600
Speaker 3: and even made her light than while we sat out back.

647
00:31:15,720 --> 00:31:17,920
Speaker 3: My partner's mom just ended up just handing them off

648
00:31:17,960 --> 00:31:21,719
Speaker 3: to her after we left. Is she the freaking devil?

649
00:31:22,120 --> 00:31:24,680
Speaker 3: I hate you? That's crazy. You're not even trying to

650
00:31:24,720 --> 00:31:26,560
Speaker 3: hide it, yeah, to just like be like, oh, you

651
00:31:26,560 --> 00:31:30,200
Speaker 3: can take them, Yeah, come on, what is her problem?

652
00:31:30,320 --> 00:31:32,160
Speaker 3: And the aunt called us to tell us and ask

653
00:31:32,200 --> 00:31:34,560
Speaker 3: how she could get more. So this year I was

654
00:31:34,600 --> 00:31:37,280
Speaker 3: planning as a Christmas birthday combined gift to pay for

655
00:31:37,360 --> 00:31:39,320
Speaker 3: half of a trip away to our hometown, with my

656
00:31:39,400 --> 00:31:41,480
Speaker 3: partner and his dad paying the other half. It was

657
00:31:41,520 --> 00:31:43,760
Speaker 3: going to be a week long set on her birthday,

658
00:31:43,800 --> 00:31:47,360
Speaker 3: with hotels, drinks, food and travel included, all up around

659
00:31:47,400 --> 00:31:50,000
Speaker 3: two thousand dollars, though at the time we only had

660
00:31:50,000 --> 00:31:52,760
Speaker 3: paid around one thousand dollars for the travel and hotel bookings.

661
00:31:52,880 --> 00:31:55,560
Speaker 3: I saved up all year for this because I really

662
00:31:55,600 --> 00:31:57,760
Speaker 3: want her to like me, because I love my boyfriend

663
00:31:57,800 --> 00:31:59,680
Speaker 3: and we're going to be together for a long time,

664
00:32:00,040 --> 00:32:01,760
Speaker 3: and I feel like that means me and her should

665
00:32:01,760 --> 00:32:03,800
Speaker 3: at least sort of get along. A week ago, she

666
00:32:03,880 --> 00:32:05,600
Speaker 3: came over to have lunch with my partner and he

667
00:32:05,640 --> 00:32:07,400
Speaker 3: told me he had come over to tell me not

668
00:32:07,560 --> 00:32:09,840
Speaker 3: to buy her any gifts because she didn't want some

669
00:32:09,880 --> 00:32:12,720
Speaker 3: tacky little trinkets spot from Target. Dude, he has not

670
00:32:12,920 --> 00:32:16,000
Speaker 3: once bought you tacky little trinkets from Target. This is insane.

671
00:32:16,040 --> 00:32:18,520
Speaker 3: He bought you a one hundred dollar necklace. He bought

672
00:32:18,560 --> 00:32:23,720
Speaker 3: you candles that were like literally specifically made for you. Yeah,

673
00:32:23,760 --> 00:32:26,520
Speaker 3: and now he's buying you a freaking two thousand dollars. Yah.

674
00:32:26,760 --> 00:32:29,240
Speaker 3: This is the proof I'm going to get gift cards

675
00:32:29,240 --> 00:32:32,560
Speaker 3: for Yeah. So my TACKI little holiday was canceled two

676
00:32:32,640 --> 00:32:34,960
Speaker 3: days later, and I've used my half of the refund

677
00:32:35,000 --> 00:32:37,280
Speaker 3: to buy my partners some lego that he always wanted

678
00:32:37,320 --> 00:32:40,040
Speaker 3: but could never afford as just a general gift because

679
00:32:40,080 --> 00:32:41,440
Speaker 3: he puts up with me and I love him. No,

680
00:32:41,840 --> 00:32:43,560
Speaker 3: it's going to get here in a month, so I've

681
00:32:43,560 --> 00:32:45,640
Speaker 3: been thinking about giving it to him as a Valentine's

682
00:32:45,680 --> 00:32:48,480
Speaker 3: Day present. On Sunday, we had an early Christmas because

683
00:32:48,480 --> 00:32:50,600
Speaker 3: it was the only time my partner's grandmother would be

684
00:32:50,640 --> 00:32:52,960
Speaker 3: in town. When it came time for gifts, I got

685
00:32:53,000 --> 00:32:56,720
Speaker 3: everyone something but her, and she looked upset when she realized,

686
00:32:56,760 --> 00:32:59,360
Speaker 3: but didn't say anything. She pulled my partner aside and

687
00:32:59,520 --> 00:33:02,600
Speaker 3: asked why she didn't get anything, and my partner told

688
00:33:02,640 --> 00:33:04,400
Speaker 3: her what her gift was going to be and that

689
00:33:04,480 --> 00:33:07,400
Speaker 3: it was already refunded like she asked. She started crying,

690
00:33:07,720 --> 00:33:10,880
Speaker 3: sort of mostly yelling and crying noises with no tears.

691
00:33:11,080 --> 00:33:17,640
Speaker 3: She's just going it's a really good impression making that

692
00:33:17,680 --> 00:33:19,360
Speaker 3: would be like and through the food that was on

693
00:33:19,360 --> 00:33:21,840
Speaker 3: the table on the floor and drove home alone. She's

694
00:33:21,880 --> 00:33:24,160
Speaker 3: been calling us for the past three days trying to

695
00:33:24,160 --> 00:33:26,320
Speaker 3: get me to change my mind, and no one but

696
00:33:26,480 --> 00:33:29,040
Speaker 3: her mom is on her side. I'm a very petty

697
00:33:29,080 --> 00:33:32,440
Speaker 3: person and it's been genuinely fun answering her calls lately.

698
00:33:32,520 --> 00:33:34,840
Speaker 3: We're having a second Christmas lunch from my partner's dad's

699
00:33:34,840 --> 00:33:37,800
Speaker 3: side of the family this Sunday, and I'm definitely looking

700
00:33:37,880 --> 00:33:41,480
Speaker 3: forward to it. Edit. Thank you so much for the support.

701
00:33:41,640 --> 00:33:43,720
Speaker 3: It actually means a lot. I do just want to

702
00:33:43,800 --> 00:33:46,520
Speaker 3: quickly defend her to let you know there's no here

703
00:33:46,600 --> 00:33:50,000
Speaker 3: at all. She's an loud LGBTQ supporter. She's just mean

704
00:33:50,040 --> 00:33:52,400
Speaker 3: as a person. That's so funny. She's an ally but

705
00:33:52,440 --> 00:33:55,560
Speaker 3: she freaking sick. She's an ally but she's a witch.

706
00:33:55,840 --> 00:33:59,040
Speaker 2: Can't fl her anyway, or she just hates people.

707
00:34:00,480 --> 00:34:05,920
Speaker 3: It's it's actually personal, but she's a Okay, there's an

708
00:34:06,000 --> 00:34:09,840
Speaker 3: update though. You any thoughts about why she's behaving this

709
00:34:09,920 --> 00:34:11,040
Speaker 3: way that aren't.

710
00:34:10,760 --> 00:34:13,719
Speaker 4: Related to home, because is she doing this like to

711
00:34:13,800 --> 00:34:16,000
Speaker 4: anyone else. That's a good question, because I know she

712
00:34:16,040 --> 00:34:18,880
Speaker 4: did say she doesn't want any target dude ads or whatever.

713
00:34:18,920 --> 00:34:21,359
Speaker 3: But was that about Op or was that just yeah

714
00:34:21,920 --> 00:34:25,239
Speaker 3: she's like oh yeah, because if it's if it's this,

715
00:34:25,320 --> 00:34:28,560
Speaker 3: then it's like okay, person. All sounds like she just

716
00:34:28,600 --> 00:34:30,880
Speaker 3: doesn't like you, she wants to get rid of you somehow,

717
00:34:30,920 --> 00:34:32,000
Speaker 3: and she's just being rode Tom.

718
00:34:32,520 --> 00:34:35,040
Speaker 4: Maybe it could be the thing where like they had

719
00:34:35,040 --> 00:34:37,960
Speaker 4: some sort of problem and then the boyfriend like told

720
00:34:37,960 --> 00:34:41,080
Speaker 4: the mom about it, and then she hasn't forgiven Op

721
00:34:41,400 --> 00:34:43,120
Speaker 4: even though they worked it out.

722
00:34:43,120 --> 00:34:45,280
Speaker 3: Maybe it's something like that she just really won't something

723
00:34:45,320 --> 00:34:47,960
Speaker 3: along those lines. Maybe those are my Those are my theories.

724
00:34:48,280 --> 00:34:50,840
Speaker 3: I like them. So it's been a bit about a

725
00:34:50,880 --> 00:34:53,440
Speaker 3: week since I made my last post and was asked

726
00:34:53,520 --> 00:34:56,240
Speaker 3: in DMS and in comments to update if anything happened,

727
00:34:56,280 --> 00:34:59,520
Speaker 3: and stuff has, but it hasn't turned out in my favor.

728
00:34:59,800 --> 00:35:03,120
Speaker 3: So oh more background info. My partner's grandfather on his

729
00:35:03,160 --> 00:35:06,040
Speaker 3: mother's side lives with us and i'm his care I

730
00:35:06,120 --> 00:35:09,160
Speaker 3: shower him, clothe him, feed him, wipe his butt, all

731
00:35:09,160 --> 00:35:11,319
Speaker 3: the fun stuff. I love the old man and I

732
00:35:11,360 --> 00:35:14,040
Speaker 3: don't mind it at all. I'm actually awake at four

733
00:35:14,080 --> 00:35:17,040
Speaker 3: am right now because he needed some toilet assistance. I'm

734
00:35:17,040 --> 00:35:19,279
Speaker 3: just gonna call him Pop for this. Pop is over

735
00:35:19,320 --> 00:35:21,279
Speaker 3: eighty and for the past few years he's had a

736
00:35:21,320 --> 00:35:24,200
Speaker 3: falling problem. He's had his blood pressure and sugar checked.

737
00:35:24,280 --> 00:35:26,680
Speaker 3: He tried and has been taken off tons of meds,

738
00:35:27,040 --> 00:35:30,080
Speaker 3: he's gotten, exercises he does for his leg muscles, and

739
00:35:30,120 --> 00:35:32,120
Speaker 3: he's in decent shape for an old man, so we

740
00:35:32,160 --> 00:35:34,520
Speaker 3: don't know what's caused it. In the week of my post,

741
00:35:34,560 --> 00:35:37,080
Speaker 3: he's fallen five times. Oh my god, only once with

742
00:35:37,120 --> 00:35:39,840
Speaker 3: injuries that bothered him. Think f though, and that happened

743
00:35:39,880 --> 00:35:42,080
Speaker 3: a day I think after the post. He hit face

744
00:35:42,160 --> 00:35:44,560
Speaker 3: first into the concrete path outside her house when we

745
00:35:44,560 --> 00:35:46,960
Speaker 3: were about to go on his walk. Superficial facial cuts

746
00:35:46,960 --> 00:35:49,400
Speaker 3: and aft up knee and some intense bruising around his

747
00:35:49,480 --> 00:35:51,879
Speaker 3: side and leg. Oh he twisted weird, I think when

748
00:35:51,880 --> 00:35:55,279
Speaker 3: he fell. Basically, he's in pain constantly right now, and

749
00:35:55,320 --> 00:35:57,520
Speaker 3: the pain meds don't last long enough for him to

750
00:35:57,560 --> 00:35:59,680
Speaker 3: do a lot of things. I can't put into words,

751
00:35:59,680 --> 00:36:02,200
Speaker 3: how nothing useless I feel over him getting hurt so

752
00:36:02,280 --> 00:36:04,600
Speaker 3: much suddenly, and how little I can do to ease it.

753
00:36:04,840 --> 00:36:07,080
Speaker 3: He did make it to Christmas lunch on Sunday, but

754
00:36:07,200 --> 00:36:09,920
Speaker 3: before that he was stuck in hospital literally up until

755
00:36:09,920 --> 00:36:12,040
Speaker 3: that day, which meant a lot of the preparation for

756
00:36:12,120 --> 00:36:15,000
Speaker 3: Christmas fell onto me, which of course meant I needed

757
00:36:15,000 --> 00:36:17,640
Speaker 3: supervision from my partner's mom. I don't think I did

758
00:36:17,640 --> 00:36:21,239
Speaker 3: a single thing right in her eyes. The one thing

759
00:36:21,280 --> 00:36:23,920
Speaker 3: I'll relent on is I'm crap at wrapping presents. They

760
00:36:23,960 --> 00:36:26,759
Speaker 3: were seriously awful, But my partner's mom, who i'll just

761
00:36:26,800 --> 00:36:29,880
Speaker 3: called mother in law, was pissed about everything. My chicken

762
00:36:29,960 --> 00:36:31,800
Speaker 3: was done pretty good, I thought, for someone who hasn't

763
00:36:31,800 --> 00:36:35,000
Speaker 3: cooked before, crunchy skin and soft inside. Just needed a

764
00:36:35,000 --> 00:36:37,239
Speaker 3: few more herbs and spices next time. Mother in law

765
00:36:37,280 --> 00:36:41,160
Speaker 3: wouldn't stop complaining the whole day. I didn't take her

766
00:36:41,160 --> 00:36:43,239
Speaker 3: advice on how to cook it. She came after I

767
00:36:43,280 --> 00:36:44,799
Speaker 3: cooked it, so I'm not sure how she thought that

768
00:36:44,840 --> 00:36:46,759
Speaker 3: one would make sense. And then I needed to leave

769
00:36:46,800 --> 00:36:48,920
Speaker 3: my partner the chef to do it next time. This

770
00:36:48,960 --> 00:36:50,840
Speaker 3: is a busy time for my partner's work, and he

771
00:36:50,880 --> 00:36:52,960
Speaker 3: had no spare time and was too tired when he

772
00:36:53,000 --> 00:36:56,200
Speaker 3: came home. Despite all the bad luck, though, somehow pop

773
00:36:56,239 --> 00:36:58,080
Speaker 3: I hadn't gotten mother in law's gift yet, and he

774
00:36:58,120 --> 00:37:00,439
Speaker 3: said I should go down to get her something't matter

775
00:37:00,480 --> 00:37:02,200
Speaker 3: what she had to like it anyway, I would have

776
00:37:02,320 --> 00:37:05,040
Speaker 3: loved to get her a lump of coal. Yes, like

777
00:37:05,120 --> 00:37:08,360
Speaker 3: someone suggested me, you're you're literally she literally heard you

778
00:37:08,400 --> 00:37:10,600
Speaker 3: say that. She literally heard meself, that's crazy in the

779
00:37:10,680 --> 00:37:12,680
Speaker 3: last post. But since it was from Pop, I thought

780
00:37:12,680 --> 00:37:14,800
Speaker 3: I should at least put minimal effort in and I

781
00:37:14,880 --> 00:37:17,040
Speaker 3: knew just the place to get her a little trinket.

782
00:37:17,080 --> 00:37:19,720
Speaker 3: I ended up getting this small sculpture for her, wrapped

783
00:37:19,719 --> 00:37:23,480
Speaker 3: it up nice, and on Christmas Day she loved it.

784
00:37:23,800 --> 00:37:27,320
Speaker 3: Would you look at that? It is a freaking personal vendetta.

785
00:37:27,520 --> 00:37:30,040
Speaker 3: She just hates you. And this is when you go, wow,

786
00:37:30,239 --> 00:37:32,399
Speaker 3: it was me all along, and she goes, I knew it.

787
00:37:32,600 --> 00:37:35,839
Speaker 3: I actually hated it. Wow. She kept going on about

788
00:37:35,840 --> 00:37:38,040
Speaker 3: how it would fit in so nicely in her lounge

789
00:37:38,080 --> 00:37:40,480
Speaker 3: room with her art set up, and how thoughtful it was.

790
00:37:40,760 --> 00:37:42,600
Speaker 3: Pop ended up telling her I was the one that

791
00:37:42,640 --> 00:37:44,319
Speaker 3: picked it out, and she asked who made it so

792
00:37:44,360 --> 00:37:45,920
Speaker 3: she could look at their other work. When I told

793
00:37:45,960 --> 00:37:49,000
Speaker 3: her I found it at Target. Stop it that's perfect

794
00:37:49,160 --> 00:37:52,120
Speaker 3: oo boy, and told her I knew she would like

795
00:37:52,160 --> 00:37:54,319
Speaker 3: it because it suited the rest of her home. She

796
00:37:54,840 --> 00:37:57,680
Speaker 3: was mad. She started yelling about how I knew she

797
00:37:57,680 --> 00:38:00,000
Speaker 3: wouldn't like it, and then I needed a trader with rispect.

798
00:38:00,400 --> 00:38:02,680
Speaker 3: My partner's uncle just laughed and told her she liked

799
00:38:02,680 --> 00:38:04,640
Speaker 3: it before, so I must have done well. For the

800
00:38:04,719 --> 00:38:07,160
Speaker 3: next part, I need to add the last bit of context.

801
00:38:07,280 --> 00:38:10,480
Speaker 3: I'm white and my partner's family are Indigenous Australian. It's

802
00:38:10,600 --> 00:38:13,080
Speaker 3: never been an issue before, but suddenly my mother in

803
00:38:13,160 --> 00:38:15,719
Speaker 3: law yelled out question why they were letting the white

804
00:38:15,760 --> 00:38:18,480
Speaker 3: boy take care of Pop. I can't remember the full sentence,

805
00:38:18,560 --> 00:38:21,920
Speaker 3: but the implication was that I'm either or neglecting him. Dude.

806
00:38:22,120 --> 00:38:22,719
Speaker 2: Oh my god.

807
00:38:22,840 --> 00:38:24,920
Speaker 3: So I don't know why I knew they were Australian.

808
00:38:25,080 --> 00:38:26,839
Speaker 3: Like I'm trying, like I knew that earlier, and I'm

809
00:38:26,840 --> 00:38:30,520
Speaker 3: trying to figure out if they say just I felt

810
00:38:30,560 --> 00:38:34,120
Speaker 3: it in my bones or they just said it. Not

811
00:38:34,320 --> 00:38:36,239
Speaker 3: to make this a whole lesson, but she did sort

812
00:38:36,239 --> 00:38:38,600
Speaker 3: of have a point. Since caring for Pop, I've seen

813
00:38:38,719 --> 00:38:41,520
Speaker 3: firsthand the negligence that comes from white nurses caring for

814
00:38:41,560 --> 00:38:45,000
Speaker 3: Aboriginal elderly versus white It's an actual problem, but her

815
00:38:45,040 --> 00:38:48,319
Speaker 3: accusing me of neglecting him hurts a lot. I asked

816
00:38:48,320 --> 00:38:50,399
Speaker 3: if she wanted to take up caring for him then,

817
00:38:50,520 --> 00:38:52,200
Speaker 3: since she had the space in her home and also

818
00:38:52,200 --> 00:38:55,439
Speaker 3: didn't work. She huffed and rolled her eyes. I wonder if,

819
00:38:55,480 --> 00:38:57,839
Speaker 3: like it seems like that may be a reason why

820
00:38:57,840 --> 00:39:01,319
Speaker 3: she doesn't like him because of because he's white, well,

821
00:39:01,360 --> 00:39:04,920
Speaker 3: because he's white, yeah, possibly because we don't really know

822
00:39:05,000 --> 00:39:05,839
Speaker 3: any other reason why.

823
00:39:06,040 --> 00:39:06,279
Speaker 1: Uh.

824
00:39:06,320 --> 00:39:09,280
Speaker 3: It was quiet for a bit until someone changed the subject,

825
00:39:09,320 --> 00:39:11,879
Speaker 3: and then we left early so Pop could go lie

826
00:39:11,920 --> 00:39:15,160
Speaker 3: down at home and get comfortable. Pop ended up calling

827
00:39:15,200 --> 00:39:17,239
Speaker 3: mother in law a cow when we got home and

828
00:39:17,239 --> 00:39:21,480
Speaker 3: told me to ignore her. Yesterday, however, the organization his cares.

829
00:39:21,520 --> 00:39:23,319
Speaker 3: They shower him every other day and clean the house.

830
00:39:23,320 --> 00:39:25,480
Speaker 3: On Wednesday, someone to look around and ask me to

831
00:39:25,560 --> 00:39:27,160
Speaker 3: leave for a bit to talk to Pop. When I

832
00:39:27,200 --> 00:39:29,759
Speaker 3: got back, she was gone, and Pop told me I

833
00:39:29,800 --> 00:39:33,080
Speaker 3: had been reported to them for elderly and she had

834
00:39:33,080 --> 00:39:36,160
Speaker 3: come to check it out. She's literally she's literally calling

835
00:39:36,200 --> 00:39:39,520
Speaker 3: a thing on him. What come on, why are you

836
00:39:39,680 --> 00:39:41,120
Speaker 3: doing this? That's why?

837
00:39:41,200 --> 00:39:41,399
Speaker 5: Yes?

838
00:39:41,600 --> 00:39:43,160
Speaker 3: Wait, clearly Pop is fine.

839
00:39:43,400 --> 00:39:47,840
Speaker 4: Yeah, Like is it just something about control or something where? Yeah,

840
00:39:47,840 --> 00:39:52,120
Speaker 4: it's not her pick or whatever, or I don't know, weird,

841
00:39:52,200 --> 00:39:52,879
Speaker 4: that's super weird.

842
00:39:52,880 --> 00:39:54,720
Speaker 3: Do we know how long they've been dating? Three years?

843
00:39:54,880 --> 00:39:57,359
Speaker 3: Three years? That's a long time, Yeah, long time. When

844
00:39:57,360 --> 00:39:59,560
Speaker 3: I got back, she was gone, and Pop told me

845
00:39:59,600 --> 00:40:02,000
Speaker 3: I had been and reported to them for elderly and

846
00:40:02,080 --> 00:40:04,080
Speaker 3: she had come to check it out. Of course, he

847
00:40:04,160 --> 00:40:06,359
Speaker 3: told her the situation with mother in law, but I'm

848
00:40:06,400 --> 00:40:09,399
Speaker 3: honestly worried they don't believe him and think I'm hurting him.

849
00:40:09,440 --> 00:40:11,399
Speaker 3: She told Pop she'd be coming back in a few

850
00:40:11,480 --> 00:40:13,759
Speaker 3: days for another checkup. Mother in law is supposed to

851
00:40:13,840 --> 00:40:16,640
Speaker 3: be coming around today, probably to snoop around the carer

852
00:40:16,800 --> 00:40:19,960
Speaker 3: checking up on him. I'm honestly too tired after this

853
00:40:20,120 --> 00:40:22,719
Speaker 3: to keep up any penniness. Though I recently had to

854
00:40:22,800 --> 00:40:24,840
Speaker 3: quit the course I was doing from home because I

855
00:40:24,960 --> 00:40:27,000
Speaker 3: just didn't have enough time to do it, help Pop

856
00:40:27,120 --> 00:40:29,839
Speaker 3: do the chores and take care of myself, and I've

857
00:40:29,880 --> 00:40:32,200
Speaker 3: been in a slump about it, and then the falls

858
00:40:32,280 --> 00:40:35,200
Speaker 3: had me feeling useless, And now this Pop says he's

859
00:40:35,239 --> 00:40:37,200
Speaker 3: not going to a home and no one else would

860
00:40:37,200 --> 00:40:39,600
Speaker 3: care for him, so I'm stuck with him, and that

861
00:40:39,719 --> 00:40:41,839
Speaker 3: he's very grateful to have me, But I really don't

862
00:40:41,880 --> 00:40:43,600
Speaker 3: know how this is going to play out. I guess

863
00:40:43,600 --> 00:40:45,320
Speaker 3: it depends on how much my mother in law is

864
00:40:45,360 --> 00:40:47,480
Speaker 3: willing to do to get back at me. A lot

865
00:40:47,600 --> 00:40:49,840
Speaker 3: she's willing to you know, she's trying to get you

866
00:40:49,880 --> 00:40:52,640
Speaker 3: in trouble with the carers right now. Yeah, which is

867
00:40:52,719 --> 00:40:55,760
Speaker 3: a well, a big deal, big deal because I'm sure

868
00:40:55,880 --> 00:40:58,240
Speaker 3: some sort of like legal action could be taken.

869
00:40:58,400 --> 00:41:01,960
Speaker 4: Yeah, So that's that's a big thing to blame someone for,

870
00:41:02,440 --> 00:41:03,120
Speaker 4: frame him for.

871
00:41:03,680 --> 00:41:06,440
Speaker 3: I hope in the end is that this report blows

872
00:41:06,480 --> 00:41:08,960
Speaker 3: over quickly with other family chiming in to point out

873
00:41:09,000 --> 00:41:12,319
Speaker 3: it's false, and that eventually everything chills the f out.

874
00:41:12,600 --> 00:41:15,120
Speaker 3: Until then, though, I think my mother in law unfortunately

875
00:41:15,320 --> 00:41:18,920
Speaker 3: has won the pettiness war. Edit. I want to defend

876
00:41:18,920 --> 00:41:21,239
Speaker 3: my partner here. He's grown up with this woman and

877
00:41:21,320 --> 00:41:24,080
Speaker 3: does usually call her out on her crap for anything major,

878
00:41:24,239 --> 00:41:26,120
Speaker 3: like he will in an hour for what she's doing.

879
00:41:26,160 --> 00:41:28,880
Speaker 3: These petty little things from before, though, are things I

880
00:41:28,960 --> 00:41:31,000
Speaker 3: know he wouldn't feel what was worth talking to him

881
00:41:31,160 --> 00:41:33,480
Speaker 3: at his mom about because it wouldn't do anything. She's

882
00:41:33,480 --> 00:41:36,040
Speaker 3: stubborn and doesn't see her own faults. We are both

883
00:41:36,040 --> 00:41:38,600
Speaker 3: grown men who both have different ways of handling things,

884
00:41:38,680 --> 00:41:40,880
Speaker 3: and his is to just let it blow over because

885
00:41:40,920 --> 00:41:44,080
Speaker 3: it's easier, and mine is to push back. I wouldn't

886
00:41:44,120 --> 00:41:47,120
Speaker 3: start some pettybs if I couldn't handle myself. I don't

887
00:41:47,160 --> 00:41:49,440
Speaker 3: expect him to waste his time trying to defend me

888
00:41:49,480 --> 00:41:52,400
Speaker 3: from his mom's usual low stake pettiness when I knowingly

889
00:41:52,440 --> 00:41:55,680
Speaker 3: act like the stereotypical sassy a hole for fun. And

890
00:41:55,719 --> 00:42:00,399
Speaker 3: there is a second update. Oh wow over man, oh man,

891
00:42:00,680 --> 00:42:03,439
Speaker 3: you know, man, Yeah, your partner needs to push back

892
00:42:03,440 --> 00:42:06,319
Speaker 3: against his mom because this behavior is ridiculous. I mean,

893
00:42:06,520 --> 00:42:08,800
Speaker 3: she's she's trying to get you in trouble legally.

894
00:42:08,960 --> 00:42:09,200
Speaker 1: Yeah.

895
00:42:09,200 --> 00:42:11,560
Speaker 3: So it's not just like she's complaining about gifts, which

896
00:42:11,680 --> 00:42:14,040
Speaker 3: was already a problem honestly that he should have been

897
00:42:14,080 --> 00:42:16,480
Speaker 3: stepping up and saying, hey, right, don't do that. But

898
00:42:16,560 --> 00:42:19,200
Speaker 3: now like the legal trouble, Yeah, that's a big deal

899
00:42:19,440 --> 00:42:20,520
Speaker 3: and it is hard.

900
00:42:20,560 --> 00:42:23,320
Speaker 4: And it's like if his way of dealing with things

901
00:42:23,400 --> 00:42:27,360
Speaker 4: is like by kind of taking a step back and it's.

902
00:42:27,160 --> 00:42:28,759
Speaker 3: Just kind of non conversational or something.

903
00:42:28,760 --> 00:42:31,719
Speaker 4: But it's like in this situation, if if your mom

904
00:42:31,760 --> 00:42:33,920
Speaker 4: doesn't like your partner, then like you can't just let

905
00:42:34,000 --> 00:42:36,319
Speaker 4: it happen because it's your partner. Like if you guys

906
00:42:36,320 --> 00:42:38,720
Speaker 4: get married and what, are you just gonna hate him forever?

907
00:42:38,960 --> 00:42:41,240
Speaker 4: Like you know, it's like that's you kind of have.

908
00:42:41,160 --> 00:42:43,000
Speaker 3: To step up. You have to say something. You can

909
00:42:43,040 --> 00:42:44,440
Speaker 3: say it in your own way. You could say it

910
00:42:44,480 --> 00:42:46,640
Speaker 3: in a non conversational way, but you gotta sa say

911
00:42:46,680 --> 00:42:50,080
Speaker 3: something exactly. But there is an update January fifteenth update.

912
00:42:50,160 --> 00:42:52,600
Speaker 3: I'm not getting my partner's side of the family anything

913
00:42:52,680 --> 00:42:55,520
Speaker 3: for Christmas, and his mom is furious. So Pop is

914
00:42:55,560 --> 00:42:58,719
Speaker 3: doing good now. His bruise is finally all healed up

915
00:42:58,719 --> 00:43:00,800
Speaker 3: and he's a lot more independent now since the pains

916
00:43:00,800 --> 00:43:03,640
Speaker 3: weren't off. We neglected looking at the muscles on his

917
00:43:03,680 --> 00:43:06,560
Speaker 3: calves and ankles because of true stereotypes that a lot

918
00:43:06,600 --> 00:43:09,759
Speaker 3: of Aboriginal Australians have tiny calves and ankles, and we,

919
00:43:10,000 --> 00:43:13,560
Speaker 3: including his GP, thought they were small solely because of that. Nope,

920
00:43:13,800 --> 00:43:17,320
Speaker 3: muscle degeneration. But we're working on it, and he's already

921
00:43:17,320 --> 00:43:20,240
Speaker 3: able to stand for five whole minutes without assistance, Wow,

922
00:43:20,320 --> 00:43:23,439
Speaker 3: which is a huge amount of time. The investigation turned

923
00:43:23,520 --> 00:43:26,000
Speaker 3: up nothing. The worker who came over came again to

924
00:43:26,040 --> 00:43:27,520
Speaker 3: tell us she had made a note that the mother

925
00:43:27,640 --> 00:43:29,839
Speaker 3: was against me being a career and had made a

926
00:43:29,880 --> 00:43:32,600
Speaker 3: false accusation. So it sounds like it'll be a lot

927
00:43:32,680 --> 00:43:35,160
Speaker 3: harder for her to make a mess of things so easily. Now,

928
00:43:35,280 --> 00:43:38,359
Speaker 3: good good. She hasn't admitted to doing it. The worker

929
00:43:38,400 --> 00:43:40,640
Speaker 3: didn't specify with her either, but I mean, who else

930
00:43:40,680 --> 00:43:42,719
Speaker 3: would do it? Yeah, it's her, it's for sure. The

931
00:43:42,800 --> 00:43:45,560
Speaker 3: timing of the last post getting attention is amazing because

932
00:43:45,600 --> 00:43:47,799
Speaker 3: I have fantastic news for a lot of you. My

933
00:43:47,920 --> 00:43:51,400
Speaker 3: fiance broke up with me a few days ago. Fantastic news.

934
00:43:51,600 --> 00:43:51,680
Speaker 1: What.

935
00:43:52,600 --> 00:43:54,239
Speaker 3: Oh, probably because a lot of people are like, you

936
00:43:54,239 --> 00:43:56,120
Speaker 3: need to break up with your partner because he's not

937
00:43:56,160 --> 00:43:59,239
Speaker 3: standing up for you. Wait after three years, I mean,

938
00:43:59,520 --> 00:44:02,080
Speaker 3: we know who made her break up with? Oh? Yeah,

939
00:44:02,120 --> 00:44:05,160
Speaker 3: I know. Yeah that was crazy. Oh my gosh.

940
00:44:05,239 --> 00:44:08,560
Speaker 2: I'm just baffled. Why you wouldn't step up for your

941
00:44:08,600 --> 00:44:10,879
Speaker 2: relationship of the person you love so much any years

942
00:44:10,920 --> 00:44:13,080
Speaker 2: and he just listened to your mom and it all

943
00:44:13,120 --> 00:44:13,759
Speaker 2: goes in the trash.

944
00:44:13,800 --> 00:44:16,760
Speaker 3: Yeah, a relationship for three years. Yeah. I had asked

945
00:44:16,760 --> 00:44:19,040
Speaker 3: for a break because for the past week he'd been

946
00:44:19,040 --> 00:44:21,440
Speaker 3: snappy and not wanted me near him so much, so

947
00:44:21,520 --> 00:44:22,920
Speaker 3: I thought it'd be a good way for me to

948
00:44:23,000 --> 00:44:24,680
Speaker 3: lean on him less and for him to have space.

949
00:44:24,760 --> 00:44:27,000
Speaker 3: He got upset at the idea, drove off to a

950
00:44:27,080 --> 00:44:28,719
Speaker 3: mates and came back and told me it was a

951
00:44:28,719 --> 00:44:30,960
Speaker 3: better idea to break up. He said he was sick

952
00:44:31,000 --> 00:44:33,799
Speaker 3: of having no time to himself because he worked all day,

953
00:44:33,880 --> 00:44:35,960
Speaker 3: and instead of relaxing when he was home, he had

954
00:44:35,960 --> 00:44:37,960
Speaker 3: to hang out and talk with me every single day.

955
00:44:38,160 --> 00:44:39,560
Speaker 2: It gets to you sometimes, you know.

956
00:44:39,760 --> 00:44:45,479
Speaker 3: Oh my god, when he's talking about me no longer

957
00:44:45,520 --> 00:44:46,480
Speaker 3: being attracted to him.

958
00:44:46,560 --> 00:44:46,960
Speaker 1: I was.

959
00:44:47,080 --> 00:44:49,080
Speaker 3: He did just complain anytime I tried to flirt with

960
00:44:49,160 --> 00:44:51,399
Speaker 3: him or make a move, So I stopped me being

961
00:44:51,440 --> 00:44:54,360
Speaker 3: financially dependent on him. I currently get six hundred dollars

962
00:44:54,480 --> 00:44:57,520
Speaker 3: four hundred and sixteen USD per fortnite on my concession

963
00:44:57,560 --> 00:45:00,320
Speaker 3: because my career allowance isn't coming in for another two weeks,

964
00:45:00,360 --> 00:45:02,600
Speaker 3: and most of my money came out paying for things

965
00:45:02,760 --> 00:45:05,080
Speaker 3: we'd both after paid, so he was buying me my

966
00:45:05,160 --> 00:45:07,279
Speaker 3: medication and food for us. We had agreed a week

967
00:45:07,320 --> 00:45:09,560
Speaker 3: before that this was okay, that he was okay with

968
00:45:09,600 --> 00:45:12,040
Speaker 3: this because once my care payments come in, I could

969
00:45:12,040 --> 00:45:14,120
Speaker 3: pay for way more stuff and the debt would be

970
00:45:14,160 --> 00:45:16,360
Speaker 3: paid off by that me spending my money on useless

971
00:45:16,360 --> 00:45:19,440
Speaker 3: stuff while we were financially unstable. I bought one hundred

972
00:45:19,480 --> 00:45:22,160
Speaker 3: dollars or sixty nine US dollars worth of books because

973
00:45:22,160 --> 00:45:24,120
Speaker 3: I hadn't had any new ones to read a month's

974
00:45:24,160 --> 00:45:26,759
Speaker 3: which was four books. Please also note he just bought

975
00:45:26,800 --> 00:45:27,680
Speaker 3: a PS five.

976
00:45:28,000 --> 00:45:33,880
Speaker 2: Dude in PS fives, aren't you no? And I really

977
00:45:33,880 --> 00:45:35,600
Speaker 2: really really really really want one.

978
00:45:35,680 --> 00:45:36,279
Speaker 3: I don't have.

979
00:45:38,680 --> 00:45:42,160
Speaker 2: Me you would, well, we could do it.

980
00:45:44,040 --> 00:45:46,400
Speaker 3: We can do a duel kind of thing like last

981
00:45:46,640 --> 00:45:48,759
Speaker 3: like what like Bridley's birthday last time? Oh?

982
00:45:48,840 --> 00:45:49,719
Speaker 2: Yeah, oh dual thing.

983
00:45:49,840 --> 00:45:52,400
Speaker 3: I couldn't ask if anyone wants to shipping for a

984
00:45:52,400 --> 00:45:53,120
Speaker 3: po live.

985
00:45:53,480 --> 00:45:55,960
Speaker 2: No, I don't have time for Yeah, you would even

986
00:45:56,160 --> 00:45:59,680
Speaker 2: even like video games that much? You play guitar Hero

987
00:45:59,840 --> 00:46:01,239
Speaker 2: that I love the guitar Hero.

988
00:46:01,600 --> 00:46:05,000
Speaker 3: And that's on the weh me being quitting my course

989
00:46:05,120 --> 00:46:07,279
Speaker 3: because I'm a lazy f who doesn't want to work

990
00:46:07,360 --> 00:46:09,239
Speaker 3: just sleep all day. Remember that I quit my course

991
00:46:09,280 --> 00:46:12,080
Speaker 3: to take care of his elderly grandfather who's scared to

992
00:46:12,120 --> 00:46:14,560
Speaker 3: be alone and can't do much himself because of falls.

993
00:46:14,680 --> 00:46:16,480
Speaker 3: Please again note the fact that he also used to

994
00:46:16,480 --> 00:46:18,920
Speaker 3: be Pop's care until he quit because everyone said he

995
00:46:18,920 --> 00:46:20,640
Speaker 3: didn't work and was lazy, and he was sick of

996
00:46:20,640 --> 00:46:22,920
Speaker 3: people not recognizing the work he put in. All of

997
00:46:22,960 --> 00:46:25,640
Speaker 3: the quotes are from the breakup messages he sent over

998
00:46:25,719 --> 00:46:28,200
Speaker 3: text while he hit in his room, edited slightly for

999
00:46:28,239 --> 00:46:31,160
Speaker 3: easy reading. I'm sorry he broke up with you over

1000
00:46:31,440 --> 00:46:33,799
Speaker 3: text after three years of relationship.

1001
00:46:33,880 --> 00:46:35,319
Speaker 2: Wow, he didn't diabolically.

1002
00:46:35,480 --> 00:46:37,520
Speaker 4: He didn't even say it was anything about the mom.

1003
00:46:37,560 --> 00:46:39,600
Speaker 4: He was just like, I just I need alone time.

1004
00:46:39,680 --> 00:46:41,680
Speaker 3: Yeah, he was like, you never I have to talk

1005
00:46:41,760 --> 00:46:45,080
Speaker 3: to you. Instead of being an adult and be like, hey,

1006
00:46:45,160 --> 00:46:46,680
Speaker 3: like I just need some alone time, he was like,

1007
00:46:46,840 --> 00:46:50,400
Speaker 3: I have to talk to you. Pop. And I have talked,

1008
00:46:50,440 --> 00:46:52,239
Speaker 3: and he's told me I'm allowed to stay and that

1009
00:46:52,320 --> 00:46:54,400
Speaker 3: my ex would be kicked out before I would if

1010
00:46:54,440 --> 00:46:56,719
Speaker 3: there ever was an issue. I'm also staying as his

1011
00:46:56,800 --> 00:46:59,640
Speaker 3: care for the foreseeable future. In fact, in a delightful twist,

1012
00:47:00,200 --> 00:47:02,120
Speaker 3: his mom called when she found out we split to

1013
00:47:02,200 --> 00:47:04,600
Speaker 3: beg me not to give up on being care because

1014
00:47:04,640 --> 00:47:08,400
Speaker 3: no one else would do it. You, you little freaking hypocrite.

1015
00:47:08,440 --> 00:47:11,160
Speaker 3: I have the biggest grin on my face. Just type

1016
00:47:11,200 --> 00:47:13,719
Speaker 3: in what happened, honestly, and I have the biggest grant

1017
00:47:13,760 --> 00:47:16,320
Speaker 3: at anytime, you guys, listen to full episodes and stories

1018
00:47:16,440 --> 00:47:18,920
Speaker 3: just like this. Just go to Apple podcast, Spotify or

1019
00:47:18,920 --> 00:47:21,000
Speaker 3: your favorite podcast app and search a book. Ay, story

1020
00:47:21,040 --> 00:47:24,040
Speaker 3: time just puts a grin on my face. Just a

1021
00:47:24,120 --> 00:47:26,799
Speaker 3: few just do it. But there is a little bit

1022
00:47:27,080 --> 00:47:32,000
Speaker 3: left to this story. His mom, he's his pop doesn't.

1023
00:47:32,320 --> 00:47:33,040
Speaker 3: And That's where I'm at.

1024
00:47:33,520 --> 00:47:37,479
Speaker 4: Good NMIs a headache for you that Yeah, he wasn't

1025
00:47:37,520 --> 00:47:38,480
Speaker 4: standing up for you at all.

1026
00:47:38,600 --> 00:47:38,880
Speaker 3: Yeah.

1027
00:47:39,040 --> 00:47:42,520
Speaker 4: Yeah, I'm glad you can still have that job. Yeah,

1028
00:47:42,560 --> 00:47:45,440
Speaker 4: and you know care for him. But a downside of that,

1029
00:47:45,520 --> 00:47:47,520
Speaker 4: I guess is that you still might have to like

1030
00:47:47,800 --> 00:47:50,880
Speaker 4: be around contech. Yeah, wish that family, which would be

1031
00:47:51,440 --> 00:47:54,040
Speaker 4: especially Yeah, but you'll find someone.

1032
00:47:54,239 --> 00:47:56,319
Speaker 3: Just like some of them, way better. It's been a

1033
00:47:56,320 --> 00:47:58,560
Speaker 3: few days since we split, and I've never had many

1034
00:47:58,600 --> 00:48:00,960
Speaker 3: life goals. I usually just follow what I'm told and

1035
00:48:01,000 --> 00:48:03,239
Speaker 3: support the person leading me, which apparently a lot of

1036
00:48:03,280 --> 00:48:06,239
Speaker 3: people caught onto easily from my posts. My only real

1037
00:48:06,320 --> 00:48:08,480
Speaker 3: goal in the last few years was to do my course,

1038
00:48:08,640 --> 00:48:10,479
Speaker 3: get a job, and get a house with my ex.

1039
00:48:10,640 --> 00:48:12,520
Speaker 3: So when he broke out with me a few days ago,

1040
00:48:12,600 --> 00:48:15,439
Speaker 3: I felt stranded very suddenly. I've since had a few

1041
00:48:15,480 --> 00:48:18,840
Speaker 3: necessary cries and postcry and apps, and then my antidepressants

1042
00:48:18,880 --> 00:48:21,040
Speaker 3: kicked in and I realized that how I've been living

1043
00:48:21,200 --> 00:48:23,560
Speaker 3: isn't at all fulfilling to me. So last night I

1044
00:48:23,600 --> 00:48:25,840
Speaker 3: applied for an online course I wanted to do that

1045
00:48:25,920 --> 00:48:28,560
Speaker 3: my ex advised me against doing months ago, and I'm

1046
00:48:28,600 --> 00:48:32,040
Speaker 3: so excited. It starts today, but since online the late

1047
00:48:32,080 --> 00:48:35,040
Speaker 3: application probably won't matter overall. I think this is a

1048
00:48:35,080 --> 00:48:37,480
Speaker 3: pretty positive note to end things on. Things look like

1049
00:48:37,520 --> 00:48:39,359
Speaker 3: they're probably going to go up from here, and I'm

1050
00:48:39,360 --> 00:48:41,359
Speaker 3: looking forward to finding out more about what i want

1051
00:48:41,360 --> 00:48:43,480
Speaker 3: to do for myself now that I'm not so focused

1052
00:48:43,480 --> 00:48:46,120
Speaker 3: on my ex. Thanks again to all the wonderful support

1053
00:48:46,120 --> 00:48:48,600
Speaker 3: from you guys. I probably wouldn't be where I am

1054
00:48:48,680 --> 00:48:51,200
Speaker 3: right now so quickly without having read all the supportive

1055
00:48:51,239 --> 00:48:54,000
Speaker 3: comments from the last post. I love you all so much. Wow,

1056
00:48:54,160 --> 00:48:56,520
Speaker 3: And there you have it. But he's doing it right now,

1057
00:48:56,560 --> 00:48:58,520
Speaker 3: I'm gonna hear it. I love a story that ends

1058
00:48:58,560 --> 00:49:03,120
Speaker 3: on a happy note too. My mother in law is toxic,

1059
00:49:03,400 --> 00:49:07,279
Speaker 3: so we cut her off but off Hi there.

1060
00:49:07,400 --> 00:49:10,239
Speaker 4: Apologies in advance for the long post. I've known my

1061
00:49:10,360 --> 00:49:13,719
Speaker 4: now husband for close to twenty years, married for close.

1062
00:49:13,520 --> 00:49:17,200
Speaker 3: To seven dang nay. My husband's sister and I were

1063
00:49:17,200 --> 00:49:17,880
Speaker 3: best friends.

1064
00:49:18,040 --> 00:49:21,239
Speaker 4: Keyword were by the way, this comes from a swordfish

1065
00:49:21,400 --> 00:49:22,200
Speaker 4: five forty five.

1066
00:49:22,239 --> 00:49:24,560
Speaker 3: That's a tongue twister on our slash. Okay, story time

1067
00:49:24,600 --> 00:49:25,040
Speaker 3: sepread it.

1068
00:49:25,200 --> 00:49:28,759
Speaker 4: So we met randomly on one Halloween at a gay bar.

1069
00:49:28,880 --> 00:49:31,800
Speaker 4: Another long story, but no, neither of us were interested

1070
00:49:31,880 --> 00:49:34,800
Speaker 4: in the same sex, and we immediately became besties.

1071
00:49:34,840 --> 00:49:37,279
Speaker 3: That's actually really funny. That is too straight people met

1072
00:49:37,280 --> 00:49:40,360
Speaker 3: at a gay bar. Yeah, that was messed up, honestly,

1073
00:49:40,480 --> 00:49:41,279
Speaker 3: that's you.

1074
00:49:42,040 --> 00:49:42,680
Speaker 2: I'm not gonna lie.

1075
00:49:42,840 --> 00:49:45,680
Speaker 3: Dare you drink pridema? Wow? Come on? We were the

1076
00:49:45,760 --> 00:49:49,200
Speaker 3: complete opposites. She was loud and boisterous, while I was

1077
00:49:49,200 --> 00:49:51,480
Speaker 3: the introvert. Fast forward a few years. In a few

1078
00:49:51,640 --> 00:49:54,719
Speaker 3: failed relationships, my grandmother was ill and given a life

1079
00:49:54,719 --> 00:49:58,040
Speaker 3: expectancy of six to eight weeks. I currently was in

1080
00:49:58,080 --> 00:49:59,200
Speaker 3: a very bad relationship.

1081
00:49:59,239 --> 00:50:03,080
Speaker 4: He was an and physically harmful, as well as everything

1082
00:50:03,239 --> 00:50:06,480
Speaker 4: that is the definition of My husband messaged me on

1083
00:50:06,480 --> 00:50:09,480
Speaker 4: Facebook saying that he thought we were friends, but apparently not.

1084
00:50:09,640 --> 00:50:12,080
Speaker 4: I had to delete all male friends as the ex

1085
00:50:12,080 --> 00:50:13,560
Speaker 4: whom I was still living with was.

1086
00:50:13,640 --> 00:50:18,040
Speaker 3: So super controlling, gross, ill, but husband stated if I

1087
00:50:18,120 --> 00:50:20,839
Speaker 3: needed anyone to talk to, he was available, as he

1088
00:50:20,880 --> 00:50:23,440
Speaker 3: was a truck driver with nothing but time to listen.

1089
00:50:23,560 --> 00:50:25,960
Speaker 3: I explained my situation to him as best I could,

1090
00:50:26,000 --> 00:50:28,280
Speaker 3: and he said that he would do whatever I needed

1091
00:50:28,320 --> 00:50:31,160
Speaker 3: to get me away from the monster that was my ex. Awesome.

1092
00:50:31,200 --> 00:50:32,319
Speaker 3: Oh thanks to that guy.

1093
00:50:32,520 --> 00:50:35,160
Speaker 4: I wound up saving his phone number in my phone

1094
00:50:35,239 --> 00:50:37,600
Speaker 4: under a girl's name. Sneaky, I know, but it was

1095
00:50:37,640 --> 00:50:39,600
Speaker 4: the only way I could meant. I wasn't even allowed

1096
00:50:39,600 --> 00:50:42,480
Speaker 4: to talk to my best friend his sister. Oh he's

1097
00:50:42,520 --> 00:50:45,000
Speaker 4: allowed to talk to his sister. I guess not, as

1098
00:50:45,040 --> 00:50:46,799
Speaker 4: she was a bad influence.

1099
00:50:47,120 --> 00:50:52,320
Speaker 3: Wow. But I finally got away from the next yay yay.

1100
00:50:52,680 --> 00:50:55,200
Speaker 4: A few months later, my husband asked if I would

1101
00:50:55,239 --> 00:50:58,000
Speaker 4: possibly want to date him a few months after getting

1102
00:50:58,000 --> 00:51:00,960
Speaker 4: out of that That's.

1103
00:51:00,200 --> 00:51:03,640
Speaker 3: That's that's really fast. That is really fast to be like, Hey,

1104
00:51:03,800 --> 00:51:05,200
Speaker 3: I know, I just got you out of a really

1105
00:51:05,320 --> 00:51:07,920
Speaker 3: dangerous thing by them. Yeah.

1106
00:51:08,000 --> 00:51:10,000
Speaker 4: I was in no place to start dating another guy

1107
00:51:10,080 --> 00:51:11,840
Speaker 4: there at that point, and he understood.

1108
00:51:11,880 --> 00:51:14,120
Speaker 3: But he's, but yeah, maybe I should just read the

1109
00:51:14,120 --> 00:51:18,680
Speaker 3: story and then I know she would get mad read yeah, but.

1110
00:51:18,719 --> 00:51:21,080
Speaker 4: Stated that he wasn't going anywhere, and he'd be there

1111
00:51:21,120 --> 00:51:22,160
Speaker 4: whenever I was ready.

1112
00:51:22,239 --> 00:51:22,799
Speaker 1: What a man.

1113
00:51:23,160 --> 00:51:25,799
Speaker 4: Amazing husband is a great man. A few weeks after

1114
00:51:25,840 --> 00:51:29,720
Speaker 4: that conversation, the ex showed up. Oh boy tried breaking

1115
00:51:29,760 --> 00:51:33,200
Speaker 4: down my door while my kids were asleep, not his kids,

1116
00:51:33,280 --> 00:51:36,239
Speaker 4: and I called my friend the new guy. I told

1117
00:51:36,320 --> 00:51:38,440
Speaker 4: him that I was thankful for everything he did to

1118
00:51:38,440 --> 00:51:40,520
Speaker 4: help me through the loss of my grandmother she was

1119
00:51:40,520 --> 00:51:42,680
Speaker 4: more of a mom than my mom ever was, and

1120
00:51:42,760 --> 00:51:44,640
Speaker 4: for helping me get out of the bad relationship I

1121
00:51:44,640 --> 00:51:45,040
Speaker 4: had been in.

1122
00:51:45,120 --> 00:51:46,399
Speaker 3: I told him for that I.

1123
00:51:46,320 --> 00:51:49,040
Speaker 4: Loved him, but that I was sure I would never

1124
00:51:49,040 --> 00:51:51,160
Speaker 4: get the chance to tell him that in person because

1125
00:51:51,200 --> 00:51:53,919
Speaker 4: my ex was there having a psychotic breakdown. He didn't

1126
00:51:53,960 --> 00:51:55,840
Speaker 4: miss a beat and said, I only did it because

1127
00:51:55,840 --> 00:51:57,000
Speaker 4: you are my sister's best.

1128
00:51:56,880 --> 00:52:00,000
Speaker 3: Friend and you were there for her when our dad passed,

1129
00:52:00,200 --> 00:52:01,840
Speaker 3: and I love you more than you know.

1130
00:52:02,280 --> 00:52:02,560
Speaker 1: Wow.

1131
00:52:02,680 --> 00:52:05,000
Speaker 4: Thankfully, the neighbors call the police and he was hauled

1132
00:52:05,040 --> 00:52:06,960
Speaker 4: away and I was able to get a restreating order.

1133
00:52:07,000 --> 00:52:08,240
Speaker 3: Oh good good.

1134
00:52:08,719 --> 00:52:10,759
Speaker 4: A few months later, I decided I would try to

1135
00:52:10,840 --> 00:52:14,040
Speaker 4: date my best friend's brother, and it was such.

1136
00:52:13,800 --> 00:52:15,000
Speaker 3: An amazing change.

1137
00:52:15,040 --> 00:52:19,600
Speaker 4: He was everything a girl could dream of, romantic, sweet, loving, great,

1138
00:52:19,640 --> 00:52:20,320
Speaker 4: with my kids.

1139
00:52:20,520 --> 00:52:21,600
Speaker 3: You name it, he did it.

1140
00:52:21,640 --> 00:52:23,880
Speaker 4: I decided to invite his entire family over to my

1141
00:52:24,000 --> 00:52:25,759
Speaker 4: place for a dinner and to get to know me.

1142
00:52:25,840 --> 00:52:27,879
Speaker 4: I asked my best friend what everyone liked to eat,

1143
00:52:27,920 --> 00:52:30,160
Speaker 4: and she said, it really doesn't matter. My mom will

1144
00:52:30,200 --> 00:52:32,319
Speaker 4: hate you no matter what you do, but she will

1145
00:52:32,360 --> 00:52:33,400
Speaker 4: be nice to your face.

1146
00:52:33,480 --> 00:52:38,200
Speaker 3: Wow. Real, Oka. My stepmom is great on the other hand,

1147
00:52:38,239 --> 00:52:40,960
Speaker 3: But if you want some brownie points, make a lemon

1148
00:52:41,080 --> 00:52:44,640
Speaker 3: meringue pie as that's her favorite. So I did just that.

1149
00:52:44,680 --> 00:52:47,040
Speaker 3: The day arrived and his mom walked in, gave me

1150
00:52:47,160 --> 00:52:50,440
Speaker 3: a once over and barely said hello, while the stepmom

1151
00:52:50,520 --> 00:52:53,280
Speaker 3: wrapped me in a hug and said welcome to the family.

1152
00:52:53,480 --> 00:52:55,480
Speaker 3: I never truly believed some of the stories that my

1153
00:52:55,520 --> 00:52:57,600
Speaker 3: Bessie told me about her mom, as they were pretty

1154
00:52:57,600 --> 00:53:00,319
Speaker 3: outlandish and as far as I was concerned, no he

1155
00:53:00,360 --> 00:53:02,640
Speaker 3: could ever be as bad as my own mother. But

1156
00:53:02,840 --> 00:53:03,759
Speaker 3: boy was a.

1157
00:53:05,360 --> 00:53:07,799
Speaker 4: My husband never really cared much to talk about her

1158
00:53:07,880 --> 00:53:10,080
Speaker 4: or his upbringing, and after what I had gone through

1159
00:53:10,120 --> 00:53:12,360
Speaker 4: with my own family, I didn't really push it. Fast

1160
00:53:12,360 --> 00:53:15,280
Speaker 4: forward three months and I planned my twins birthday party

1161
00:53:15,280 --> 00:53:17,200
Speaker 4: for my weekend off. Four months from the day I

1162
00:53:17,239 --> 00:53:20,080
Speaker 4: initially planned the party out. Wow, that's a far away.

1163
00:53:20,280 --> 00:53:23,640
Speaker 3: I sent out Facebook invites to everyone, including his family.

1164
00:53:23,680 --> 00:53:25,160
Speaker 3: They all said that they would love to come.

1165
00:53:25,200 --> 00:53:28,120
Speaker 4: Thanksgiving rolls around and we're at his extended family's house

1166
00:53:28,160 --> 00:53:30,799
Speaker 4: for celebrations. His mom waits until my husband to be

1167
00:53:30,920 --> 00:53:34,320
Speaker 4: steps outside for a sick and pipes up that she's

1168
00:53:34,400 --> 00:53:36,560
Speaker 4: planned a surprise party for her mother.

1169
00:53:36,719 --> 00:53:41,719
Speaker 3: It's for the same day and time of my daughter's

1170
00:53:41,800 --> 00:53:45,520
Speaker 3: party in Vain, which is a five hour drive from

1171
00:53:45,560 --> 00:53:46,239
Speaker 3: where we are.

1172
00:53:46,600 --> 00:53:46,839
Speaker 2: Wow.

1173
00:53:47,160 --> 00:53:52,360
Speaker 3: End, Wow, come on, that's come on? Did you just pickonel?

1174
00:53:52,600 --> 00:53:52,799
Speaker 5: Yeah?

1175
00:53:52,880 --> 00:53:54,600
Speaker 3: Did you just find a lady who had a birthday

1176
00:53:54,600 --> 00:53:56,680
Speaker 3: at the same time? She just chose. She's like, this

1177
00:53:56,760 --> 00:53:57,520
Speaker 3: is your birthday now?

1178
00:53:57,640 --> 00:53:57,799
Speaker 1: Yeah?

1179
00:53:57,880 --> 00:53:59,080
Speaker 3: There the parties there now.

1180
00:53:59,320 --> 00:54:02,279
Speaker 4: I kindly pointed out that she'd already rs repeated to

1181
00:54:02,280 --> 00:54:05,600
Speaker 4: my kids party, and she turns on me and screams

1182
00:54:05,760 --> 00:54:09,760
Speaker 4: in fran Tresha's voice, my son already lost his father,

1183
00:54:10,040 --> 00:54:12,640
Speaker 4: you expected to lose his grandmother too.

1184
00:54:12,880 --> 00:54:17,440
Speaker 3: He's really close to her. How selfish of a little bee?

1185
00:54:17,520 --> 00:54:19,360
Speaker 3: Can you beat? Dang?

1186
00:54:19,520 --> 00:54:22,440
Speaker 4: Everyone rate my impression. I have never watched that show.

1187
00:54:22,840 --> 00:54:23,919
Speaker 4: I love that show.

1188
00:54:25,120 --> 00:54:28,160
Speaker 3: I've seen clips of just her outfits, her outfits are amazing. Yeah,

1189
00:54:28,200 --> 00:54:29,520
Speaker 3: I love that's great. I love that.

1190
00:54:29,680 --> 00:54:33,280
Speaker 4: I felt like I was two inches tall plus. Having

1191
00:54:33,360 --> 00:54:36,960
Speaker 4: just lost the only mother grandmother I knew, really stung.

1192
00:54:37,160 --> 00:54:39,960
Speaker 4: I said, well, I have close to fifty people coming

1193
00:54:40,000 --> 00:54:42,719
Speaker 4: to the party you included, so I'm not sure what

1194
00:54:42,760 --> 00:54:44,479
Speaker 4: I can do. She told me to push it back

1195
00:54:44,640 --> 00:54:47,640
Speaker 4: just one day, that people will understand, and that if

1196
00:54:47,680 --> 00:54:48,760
Speaker 4: they couldn't, then they.

1197
00:54:48,600 --> 00:54:51,319
Speaker 3: Weren't really my friends. So I told my husband about

1198
00:54:51,320 --> 00:54:53,680
Speaker 3: the party, but didn't say anything about the conversation his

1199
00:54:53,800 --> 00:54:56,560
Speaker 3: mother had with me while everyone just stared at me.

1200
00:54:56,640 --> 00:54:58,760
Speaker 3: I would definitely tell me. I'd be like, your mom

1201
00:54:58,840 --> 00:55:05,440
Speaker 3: said this to me. Oh, use it was mean to me.

1202
00:55:06,000 --> 00:55:09,200
Speaker 4: I pushed my kids party one day and we made

1203
00:55:09,280 --> 00:55:11,920
Speaker 4: the trek to Maine. We walk into the party and

1204
00:55:11,960 --> 00:55:15,000
Speaker 4: grandma was floored to see my husband, as she hadn't

1205
00:55:15,080 --> 00:55:17,280
Speaker 4: seen him in fifteen years.

1206
00:55:17,760 --> 00:55:21,120
Speaker 3: Wow, but according to his mother, he was so close.

1207
00:55:21,239 --> 00:55:23,640
Speaker 3: This is why you talked to your husband. Yeah that's

1208
00:55:23,760 --> 00:55:24,440
Speaker 3: that's crazy.

1209
00:55:24,520 --> 00:55:27,600
Speaker 4: Yeah, definitely communication with Heck, come on, so petty me

1210
00:55:27,880 --> 00:55:31,160
Speaker 4: started asking people when they'd found out about the surprise party.

1211
00:55:31,280 --> 00:55:34,840
Speaker 4: Mind you, this was almost twenty days after the Thanksgiving incident.

1212
00:55:35,040 --> 00:55:39,760
Speaker 3: They found out the thing day before. Oh my god,

1213
00:55:39,920 --> 00:55:41,040
Speaker 3: Oh my god, come on.

1214
00:55:41,280 --> 00:55:44,520
Speaker 4: I then told Hubby to be exactly what had transpired,

1215
00:55:44,520 --> 00:55:47,239
Speaker 4: and he was so pissed that we immediately left. We

1216
00:55:47,239 --> 00:55:49,640
Speaker 4: were there for all of an hour. The next day,

1217
00:55:49,719 --> 00:55:52,359
Speaker 4: my kid's party happened and only three people were able

1218
00:55:52,400 --> 00:55:55,319
Speaker 4: to come due to other events church, wedding, funeral, and

1219
00:55:55,360 --> 00:55:56,360
Speaker 4: other family gatherings.

1220
00:55:56,400 --> 00:55:57,840
Speaker 3: Fifty to three people.

1221
00:55:57,960 --> 00:56:00,200
Speaker 4: It was fifty people originally and then it got down

1222
00:56:00,239 --> 00:56:02,200
Speaker 4: size to three because that's all it could come because

1223
00:56:02,200 --> 00:56:02,799
Speaker 4: of the night chain.

1224
00:56:02,920 --> 00:56:07,160
Speaker 3: Were they oh to the kid's birthday party? Yeah? Yeah,

1225
00:56:07,200 --> 00:56:09,880
Speaker 3: that's so sad. I wouldn't have changed the This is

1226
00:56:09,880 --> 00:56:11,600
Speaker 3: why you need to talk to your husband before you

1227
00:56:11,640 --> 00:56:11,960
Speaker 3: do these.

1228
00:56:12,120 --> 00:56:12,319
Speaker 5: Right.

1229
00:56:12,560 --> 00:56:14,799
Speaker 3: You could have been like, hey, like your mom really

1230
00:56:14,800 --> 00:56:18,120
Speaker 3: wants you to go to your grandma's when granma birthday party?

1231
00:56:18,200 --> 00:56:20,440
Speaker 3: Yeah right? Would you rather that? Or do you want

1232
00:56:20,440 --> 00:56:23,479
Speaker 3: to like keep our daughter's birthdays the same?

1233
00:56:23,920 --> 00:56:28,320
Speaker 4: His family never showed, but it was only a five

1234
00:56:28,440 --> 00:56:31,160
Speaker 4: hour drive. I told my husband that I would never

1235
00:56:31,239 --> 00:56:34,719
Speaker 4: again rearrange my life for that fee again, and that

1236
00:56:34,840 --> 00:56:38,319
Speaker 4: she had a new found enemy because she screwed with

1237
00:56:38,400 --> 00:56:41,680
Speaker 4: my kids. Don't talk to me and my son ever again,

1238
00:56:41,960 --> 00:56:42,680
Speaker 4: ever again.

1239
00:56:42,880 --> 00:56:45,600
Speaker 3: You better hear me. Better count your days out your day.

1240
00:56:45,680 --> 00:56:48,360
Speaker 3: You're messing with your son. Yeah, you're gonna be messing

1241
00:56:48,360 --> 00:56:54,360
Speaker 3: with these fists. Chow sham. That's right. Fast forward a

1242
00:56:54,480 --> 00:56:58,319
Speaker 3: year we got engaged. No way, congrats. I told him

1243
00:56:58,360 --> 00:57:00,000
Speaker 3: way before we even discussed marriage.

1244
00:57:00,200 --> 00:57:02,239
Speaker 4: If I ever found someone who wanted to marry me,

1245
00:57:02,400 --> 00:57:04,279
Speaker 4: I was doing it on a certain date as it

1246
00:57:04,320 --> 00:57:06,080
Speaker 4: was my grandparents anniversary and.

1247
00:57:06,000 --> 00:57:08,680
Speaker 3: They raised me and taught me what love was. That

1248
00:57:08,800 --> 00:57:09,480
Speaker 3: is so sweet.

1249
00:57:10,000 --> 00:57:12,279
Speaker 4: But also I see us in the chat, I see

1250
00:57:12,320 --> 00:57:15,160
Speaker 4: us in the chat schedules.

1251
00:57:14,920 --> 00:57:18,640
Speaker 3: H And the mom's gonna say your grandma's birthdays actually

1252
00:57:18,680 --> 00:57:21,320
Speaker 3: on that day, and she's gonna be like, wasn't Grandma's

1253
00:57:21,320 --> 00:57:24,040
Speaker 3: birthday like in May? Last time? She's like wow, Like no,

1254
00:57:24,080 --> 00:57:27,200
Speaker 3: I never said that. No, No, that was your grandmother's

1255
00:57:27,960 --> 00:57:32,400
Speaker 3: anniverse three yeah, strip gas lighting round. Yeah. He agreed,

1256
00:57:32,480 --> 00:57:34,120
Speaker 3: and so that the date was perfect.

1257
00:57:34,280 --> 00:57:36,320
Speaker 4: We went to the families for a New Year's Day

1258
00:57:36,480 --> 00:57:39,200
Speaker 4: and told them all were excited and wanted to see

1259
00:57:39,240 --> 00:57:41,959
Speaker 4: the ring. My husband to be worked out of town

1260
00:57:42,040 --> 00:57:43,800
Speaker 4: for four to six weeks at a time and would

1261
00:57:43,840 --> 00:57:46,000
Speaker 4: only be home three to four days, so that night

1262
00:57:46,080 --> 00:57:48,320
Speaker 4: he left for work, and a week later, his mother

1263
00:57:48,400 --> 00:57:51,280
Speaker 4: blew up my phone, stating that I needed to change

1264
00:57:51,320 --> 00:57:54,880
Speaker 4: the date because her daughter, Coco, was graduating from college

1265
00:57:55,000 --> 00:57:57,880
Speaker 4: that day. I told her no because the college is

1266
00:57:57,960 --> 00:57:59,960
Speaker 4: only a five hour drive from the wedding venue and

1267
00:58:00,080 --> 00:58:02,320
Speaker 4: if she couldn't make it, then she didn't have to

1268
00:58:02,400 --> 00:58:05,840
Speaker 4: be there anyway. Coco two point zero was supposed to

1269
00:58:05,920 --> 00:58:08,680
Speaker 4: be a bridesmaid, as well as my best friend and

1270
00:58:08,880 --> 00:58:12,040
Speaker 4: the half sister whom I adore. Group Facebook messages were

1271
00:58:12,080 --> 00:58:14,560
Speaker 4: sent out to the bridesmaids showing them the dresses we picked,

1272
00:58:14,800 --> 00:58:17,080
Speaker 4: and they had four to five different styles, and the

1273
00:58:17,120 --> 00:58:19,240
Speaker 4: one with the most boats was the dress. All were

1274
00:58:19,320 --> 00:58:21,680
Speaker 4: ninety nine dollars. The mother again blew up my phone,

1275
00:58:21,720 --> 00:58:23,840
Speaker 4: saying that ninety nine was too much to ask anyone

1276
00:58:23,920 --> 00:58:25,920
Speaker 4: to pay, and that the bride's family is supposed to

1277
00:58:25,960 --> 00:58:27,320
Speaker 4: pay for everything wedding related.

1278
00:58:27,400 --> 00:58:29,040
Speaker 3: That doesn't really happen much anymore.

1279
00:58:29,160 --> 00:58:29,480
Speaker 5: Yeah, I know.

1280
00:58:29,800 --> 00:58:33,360
Speaker 4: My grandparents were passed away at this point. Reason number

1281
00:58:33,400 --> 00:58:35,200
Speaker 4: two for choosing.

1282
00:58:34,880 --> 00:58:35,760
Speaker 3: The day we chose.

1283
00:58:35,800 --> 00:58:38,920
Speaker 4: My mother is very much like Coco, and I've severed

1284
00:58:38,960 --> 00:58:41,320
Speaker 4: ties with her for the most part, and my father

1285
00:58:41,560 --> 00:58:43,880
Speaker 4: was retired and barely makes ends meet.

1286
00:58:44,080 --> 00:58:47,880
Speaker 3: So oh because the mom is Coco and then her

1287
00:58:47,960 --> 00:58:52,479
Speaker 3: daughter's Cocoa two point zero. Oh, I see, I see.

1288
00:58:52,600 --> 00:58:54,480
Speaker 3: So my husband and I were paying for the wedding.

1289
00:58:54,600 --> 00:58:56,880
Speaker 4: She kept going on and on about the dresses, and

1290
00:58:56,960 --> 00:58:59,280
Speaker 4: I told her the only way I could afford dresses

1291
00:58:59,280 --> 00:59:03,560
Speaker 4: for everybody if I bought black trash compactor bags. Looking back,

1292
00:59:03,680 --> 00:59:06,280
Speaker 4: I can understand a bit when she freaked out, saying

1293
00:59:06,360 --> 00:59:08,160
Speaker 4: I was calling her daughter's trash.

1294
00:59:08,240 --> 00:59:10,920
Speaker 3: That was not my intention. But if the shoe fits,

1295
00:59:11,160 --> 00:59:13,600
Speaker 3: wear it, that's definitely not what you were doing. No,

1296
00:59:13,840 --> 00:59:17,280
Speaker 3: not at all. You're just saying you're por kidding it.

1297
00:59:17,800 --> 00:59:18,240
Speaker 3: Not rich.

1298
00:59:18,640 --> 00:59:20,680
Speaker 4: Yeah, it's saying that that's just what you could afford

1299
00:59:20,840 --> 00:59:21,600
Speaker 4: is trash bags.

1300
00:59:21,680 --> 00:59:24,400
Speaker 3: It's not that you want that. You don't want trash bags.

1301
00:59:24,440 --> 00:59:28,880
Speaker 4: You want to dress exactly petty. Maybe she kept going

1302
00:59:28,920 --> 00:59:31,840
Speaker 4: on about every detail about our day. Husband told her

1303
00:59:31,840 --> 00:59:34,000
Speaker 4: that if she kept it up, he would hire security

1304
00:59:34,040 --> 00:59:36,840
Speaker 4: and throw her out on her a. Cocoa two point

1305
00:59:36,880 --> 00:59:39,320
Speaker 4: zero called me every unimaginable name in the book and

1306
00:59:39,360 --> 00:59:41,200
Speaker 4: said that she was not going to be.

1307
00:59:41,360 --> 00:59:43,440
Speaker 3: Part of our day. Filled with hatred.

1308
00:59:43,600 --> 00:59:45,640
Speaker 4: At this point, both of us were like whatever, and

1309
00:59:45,680 --> 00:59:47,440
Speaker 4: told her that if she chose to come, then so

1310
00:59:47,560 --> 00:59:49,480
Speaker 4: be it. She just wasn't allowed to wear the color

1311
00:59:49,520 --> 00:59:50,280
Speaker 4: of the bridal party.

1312
00:59:50,320 --> 00:59:52,920
Speaker 3: But she showed up in that color.

1313
00:59:53,000 --> 00:59:55,880
Speaker 4: Come on, lady, and the mom showed up in black

1314
00:59:56,000 --> 00:59:57,760
Speaker 4: because she was in mourning.

1315
00:59:57,520 --> 01:00:00,600
Speaker 3: For what for what? She's like, I'm in more that

1316
01:00:00,680 --> 01:00:03,800
Speaker 3: you're getting married. Yeah, yeah, I just don't like it.

1317
01:00:03,960 --> 01:00:06,200
Speaker 4: Husband refused to do a mother son dance with her,

1318
01:00:06,360 --> 01:00:09,200
Speaker 4: but did one with the stepmother. All in all, it

1319
01:00:09,240 --> 01:00:11,120
Speaker 4: was a great day, and yes we did have security

1320
01:00:11,160 --> 01:00:13,280
Speaker 4: there just in case. But aside from the black dress,

1321
01:00:13,360 --> 01:00:15,640
Speaker 4: she was on her best behavior since then. My husband

1322
01:00:15,720 --> 01:00:18,560
Speaker 4: had severed ties with her as she went all around

1323
01:00:18,560 --> 01:00:20,280
Speaker 4: the town, saying that I should have been the one

1324
01:00:20,280 --> 01:00:24,440
Speaker 4: who passed away as her daughter, my god, my bestie,

1325
01:00:24,640 --> 01:00:26,960
Speaker 4: and I had the VID At the same time, he

1326
01:00:27,160 --> 01:00:30,240
Speaker 4: told her to not contact him unless she was passing

1327
01:00:30,280 --> 01:00:31,960
Speaker 4: away because he didn't care.

1328
01:00:32,080 --> 01:00:35,360
Speaker 3: That's a crazy thing. That's insane. Oh my god, insane,

1329
01:00:35,360 --> 01:00:36,880
Speaker 3: What a horrible, horrible thing to say.

1330
01:00:36,920 --> 01:00:39,320
Speaker 4: So far past the line, she has so far not

1331
01:00:39,480 --> 01:00:42,120
Speaker 4: contacted him, and it will be a year in January.

1332
01:00:42,200 --> 01:00:45,120
Speaker 4: By the way, do you know what's not crossing the

1333
01:00:45,160 --> 01:00:48,280
Speaker 4: line is going to your favorite podcast s app whether

1334
01:00:48,280 --> 01:00:51,959
Speaker 4: it's Spotify, Apple Podcasts, iHeartRadio, whatever you choose. Search, Okay,

1335
01:00:52,000 --> 01:00:54,600
Speaker 4: storytime and then you'll find more episodes. Was full stories

1336
01:00:54,840 --> 01:00:57,360
Speaker 4: just like this one. Okay, that's not crossing the line.

1337
01:00:57,400 --> 01:00:59,080
Speaker 4: That's not cross the line at all. That's perfectly reason,

1338
01:00:59,240 --> 01:01:03,120
Speaker 4: that's perfectly There is a little bit more to this story.

1339
01:01:03,160 --> 01:01:06,919
Speaker 3: But oh my gosh, what's Yeah, this mom is whack yeah,

1340
01:01:07,080 --> 01:01:10,720
Speaker 3: whack a doodle. She just keeps getting worse, so much worse.

1341
01:01:10,800 --> 01:01:13,760
Speaker 3: She keeps getting worse. Yeah, my goodness. Like she just

1342
01:01:13,920 --> 01:01:16,160
Speaker 3: started from hating you no matter what. Yeah, and then

1343
01:01:16,200 --> 01:01:18,560
Speaker 3: she really hated you, really hated you. And then it

1344
01:01:18,600 --> 01:01:19,400
Speaker 3: became really personal.

1345
01:01:19,440 --> 01:01:21,320
Speaker 4: And it's like, what I thought, you just hate me

1346
01:01:21,320 --> 01:01:23,120
Speaker 4: because you're a crazy person.

1347
01:01:22,880 --> 01:01:24,920
Speaker 5: Not you dotting everyone. But now I'm finding it out

1348
01:01:24,960 --> 01:01:28,000
Speaker 5: that you hate just me specifically. Lot, Like, what's going

1349
01:01:28,320 --> 01:01:31,760
Speaker 5: what's going on? Let's have a face to face little chat. Yeah,

1350
01:01:31,800 --> 01:01:32,800
Speaker 5: what's your deal with me?

1351
01:01:32,880 --> 01:01:34,520
Speaker 3: Let's talk about it. Give me on the phone, let's

1352
01:01:34,600 --> 01:01:37,160
Speaker 3: chit chat. Man, get her on the stream, call her up,

1353
01:01:37,200 --> 01:01:40,080
Speaker 3: call her up. But anyway, there a little bit more.

1354
01:01:40,320 --> 01:01:40,880
Speaker 3: Let's read it.

1355
01:01:40,960 --> 01:01:44,120
Speaker 4: This woman also got physical with me while I was

1356
01:01:44,400 --> 01:01:48,720
Speaker 4: pregnant with her grandson. On Wow, she flipped out on

1357
01:01:48,800 --> 01:01:51,040
Speaker 4: my husband, saying that I can't keep her from her

1358
01:01:51,080 --> 01:01:54,240
Speaker 4: grandchild just because I hate her new splash, Cocoa, I

1359
01:01:54,280 --> 01:01:57,280
Speaker 4: don't hate you. I just don't need my child brainwashed

1360
01:01:57,280 --> 01:01:59,760
Speaker 4: by someone who hates his mother when I really don't

1361
01:01:59,760 --> 01:02:02,160
Speaker 4: think I did anything wrong. So am I the a

1362
01:02:02,240 --> 01:02:04,600
Speaker 4: hole for standing my ground and not letting Coco and

1363
01:02:04,640 --> 01:02:07,880
Speaker 4: Coco two point zero walk all over me in Our Lives?

1364
01:02:08,000 --> 01:02:10,360
Speaker 3: Dude or not not at all? Thank you and sorry

1365
01:02:10,400 --> 01:02:11,040
Speaker 3: for the long read.

1366
01:02:11,160 --> 01:02:13,240
Speaker 4: Would love to know if my husband and I are

1367
01:02:13,560 --> 01:02:14,600
Speaker 4: right in cutting contact.

1368
01:02:14,640 --> 01:02:17,640
Speaker 3: Then there is an update. Oh, a quick update. I'm

1369
01:02:17,680 --> 01:02:20,040
Speaker 3: gonna do it right, quick, good, big update. Coco recently

1370
01:02:20,120 --> 01:02:22,840
Speaker 3: tried to worm her way back into Our Lives two

1371
01:02:22,880 --> 01:02:25,439
Speaker 3: days ago, and he told her to go get bad

1372
01:02:25,600 --> 01:02:28,800
Speaker 3: good get bat Coco. We don't watch you in Our Lives.

1373
01:02:28,880 --> 01:02:32,000
Speaker 3: You diabottical witch. That's the end of the story. Story.

1374
01:02:32,280 --> 01:02:34,600
Speaker 3: Any final thoughts like you have any final lots? I mean,

1375
01:02:34,720 --> 01:02:36,480
Speaker 3: I guess it's just crazy.

1376
01:02:37,600 --> 01:02:39,160
Speaker 2: Hey, it's John here, og host of the show.

1377
01:02:39,160 --> 01:02:40,600
Speaker 1: We're gonna get back to these juicy stories.

1378
01:02:40,600 --> 01:02:42,760
Speaker 2: But here's a quick three minutes of ads from our sponsors.

1379
01:02:43,320 --> 01:02:46,640
Speaker 1: My friendship of eleven years is falling apart. I think

1380
01:02:46,680 --> 01:02:48,280
Speaker 1: I need to cut ties with her.

1381
01:02:49,200 --> 01:02:50,720
Speaker 2: He's the problem, not me.

1382
01:02:51,120 --> 01:02:53,760
Speaker 1: This requires a bit of a backstory, so sorry for

1383
01:02:53,800 --> 01:02:55,640
Speaker 1: the long post. I'll try to keep it as brief

1384
01:02:55,640 --> 01:02:57,840
Speaker 1: as I can. Smiley face, I think much twenty have

1385
01:02:57,880 --> 01:03:01,680
Speaker 1: been friends with Jay Mail twenty one, say James for

1386
01:03:01,800 --> 01:03:05,840
Speaker 1: eleven years. We met in school in year five, ages

1387
01:03:05,880 --> 01:03:08,240
Speaker 1: around nine to ten. Around the same time, we also

1388
01:03:08,240 --> 01:03:12,280
Speaker 1: had a friend f female twenty let's call that Frankie,

1389
01:03:12,520 --> 01:03:14,920
Speaker 1: who joined our school slightly later due to bullying in

1390
01:03:15,000 --> 01:03:17,760
Speaker 1: her previous school. By the way, this comes from user

1391
01:03:17,840 --> 01:03:21,080
Speaker 1: alert Butterfly twenty two seventeen, and you can submit your

1392
01:03:21,160 --> 01:03:24,240
Speaker 1: stories on the r slash showcase storytime supreddit. From nine

1393
01:03:24,280 --> 01:03:28,320
Speaker 1: to sixteen, we three were inseparable, like every lesson and

1394
01:03:28,400 --> 01:03:31,280
Speaker 1: waking hour was spent with or talking to each other

1395
01:03:31,320 --> 01:03:34,680
Speaker 1: in some form. Other friends joined at points, but we

1396
01:03:34,680 --> 01:03:38,680
Speaker 1: were swiftly kicked out, oftentimes because Frankie had argued with

1397
01:03:38,720 --> 01:03:42,560
Speaker 1: them about something petty that schoolgirls usually argue over, being

1398
01:03:42,600 --> 01:03:45,320
Speaker 1: left out of sleepovers or just not getting on with Frankie.

1399
01:03:45,360 --> 01:03:47,560
Speaker 1: I would occasionally argue with Frankie, but we were both

1400
01:03:47,640 --> 01:03:50,520
Speaker 1: strong willed and quite stubborn people, which would later be

1401
01:03:50,560 --> 01:03:53,400
Speaker 1: the downfall of our friendship. In sixth form in the UK,

1402
01:03:53,640 --> 01:03:56,520
Speaker 1: this is ages sixteen through eighteen, junior and senior year

1403
01:03:56,560 --> 01:03:59,600
Speaker 1: of high school for reference, Frankie decided to move schools.

1404
01:04:00,200 --> 01:04:02,760
Speaker 1: Me and James were heartbroken and worried our tight knit

1405
01:04:02,800 --> 01:04:05,120
Speaker 1: group would start to fade. I will admit I was

1406
01:04:05,160 --> 01:04:09,320
Speaker 1: partially excited with six form. This means parties opportunities to

1407
01:04:09,360 --> 01:04:11,720
Speaker 1: mix with people we hadn't yet and had a chance to.

1408
01:04:12,320 --> 01:04:14,520
Speaker 1: I haste to say that Frankie didn't let us, as

1409
01:04:14,520 --> 01:04:17,280
Speaker 1: we did stick to our trio, but she did make

1410
01:04:17,320 --> 01:04:20,040
Speaker 1: it incredibly difficult to branch out a few new people

1411
01:04:20,120 --> 01:04:22,680
Speaker 1: join mine and James's friend group. At school, we had

1412
01:04:22,720 --> 01:04:25,720
Speaker 1: a group about five of us with Frankie included. We

1413
01:04:25,760 --> 01:04:27,360
Speaker 1: always tried to make our best to make her part

1414
01:04:27,360 --> 01:04:31,040
Speaker 1: of our plans where was possible. Frankie really didn't like

1415
01:04:31,120 --> 01:04:34,840
Speaker 1: one of these people, a girl called el Lizzie female twenty,

1416
01:04:35,120 --> 01:04:38,600
Speaker 1: and would constantly itch and say she was trying to

1417
01:04:38,640 --> 01:04:42,320
Speaker 1: steal me and James from her. Lizzie was Lizzie was

1418
01:04:42,400 --> 01:04:44,840
Speaker 1: and still is my best friend. She's in no way

1419
01:04:45,000 --> 01:04:48,280
Speaker 1: a bad perse. Fast forward to university. We all split

1420
01:04:48,360 --> 01:04:51,680
Speaker 1: and move across the country to our various universities. James

1421
01:04:51,680 --> 01:04:53,560
Speaker 1: decided to host me and Frankie to come down for

1422
01:04:53,600 --> 01:04:56,120
Speaker 1: a few days to his university, and whilst we're there,

1423
01:04:56,440 --> 01:05:01,400
Speaker 1: Frankie immediately starts to flirt with James's housemate, Biggie. I

1424
01:05:01,440 --> 01:05:04,320
Speaker 1: have James. James comes down with the flu the next

1425
01:05:04,400 --> 01:05:07,200
Speaker 1: day and I'm left third wheeling with them. Slightly annoying,

1426
01:05:07,400 --> 01:05:11,120
Speaker 1: but whatever. She spends the night with this guy again,

1427
01:05:11,640 --> 01:05:14,560
Speaker 1: no judgment, I really don't care. Get your freak on,

1428
01:05:14,600 --> 01:05:18,680
Speaker 1: Frankie and she and him are loudly having spicy sleep,

1429
01:05:18,840 --> 01:05:21,240
Speaker 1: which we can hear from two doors down, so she

1430
01:05:21,400 --> 01:05:23,440
Speaker 1: really got her freak on. She wakes us up at

1431
01:05:23,480 --> 01:05:25,960
Speaker 1: six am, an hour before I'm up to catch my

1432
01:05:26,040 --> 01:05:28,560
Speaker 1: train home, and is lovely talking about the whole event.

1433
01:05:28,720 --> 01:05:31,400
Speaker 1: I got on the train miffed, to be honest, because

1434
01:05:31,400 --> 01:05:34,560
Speaker 1: for separate reason it wasn't the best weekend. Frankie gets

1435
01:05:34,560 --> 01:05:37,520
Speaker 1: close to Lizzie and Lizzie tells me she's not free

1436
01:05:37,560 --> 01:05:40,160
Speaker 1: to meet up one day. An hour later, I get

1437
01:05:40,200 --> 01:05:42,640
Speaker 1: a snap of her and Frankie together. This is the

1438
01:05:42,680 --> 01:05:46,440
Speaker 1: only time Lizzie's mentioned in a negative light. University was

1439
01:05:46,440 --> 01:05:48,400
Speaker 1: tough at this point, and seeing them together was the

1440
01:05:48,480 --> 01:05:51,400
Speaker 1: final straw. I cried to my parents, who told me

1441
01:05:51,440 --> 01:05:55,240
Speaker 1: to block them both, so I did. James's birthday is

1442
01:05:55,280 --> 01:05:57,200
Speaker 1: a few weeks after this, and he wants to do

1443
01:05:57,240 --> 01:06:00,960
Speaker 1: a big gathering Frankie and Lizzie included. I unblocked them

1444
01:06:00,960 --> 01:06:03,920
Speaker 1: both and attend the drinks. Frankie tells me over text

1445
01:06:03,960 --> 01:06:06,840
Speaker 1: she has missed me. I apologize and say I missed

1446
01:06:06,840 --> 01:06:09,680
Speaker 1: her too. When we meet up, she doesn't acknowledge me

1447
01:06:09,920 --> 01:06:12,840
Speaker 1: at all, and after going to a couple of bars,

1448
01:06:13,120 --> 01:06:15,760
Speaker 1: she starts shouting at me whilst we're smoking, telling me

1449
01:06:15,800 --> 01:06:18,439
Speaker 1: how she had unliving thoughts and wanted to drop out,

1450
01:06:18,520 --> 01:06:23,480
Speaker 1: and that it's all my fault. I was baffled. I

1451
01:06:23,560 --> 01:06:27,200
Speaker 1: legitimately had only blocked her two weeks ago. Frankie says,

1452
01:06:27,560 --> 01:06:29,680
Speaker 1: I don't know what she's been through, and I argue

1453
01:06:29,680 --> 01:06:32,400
Speaker 1: back that she never once asked how I was, and

1454
01:06:32,440 --> 01:06:36,120
Speaker 1: therefore could not speak. I was feeling the exact same,

1455
01:06:36,160 --> 01:06:39,080
Speaker 1: by the way. Somehow we reach a stalemate and agreed

1456
01:06:39,120 --> 01:06:41,400
Speaker 1: to move on from here. I don't think you should

1457
01:06:41,480 --> 01:06:43,640
Speaker 1: move on from here. That's a weird thing to move

1458
01:06:43,640 --> 01:06:46,800
Speaker 1: on from. That's a very serious conversation to have with

1459
01:06:46,880 --> 01:06:49,440
Speaker 1: your friend that you so care about. It seems like

1460
01:06:49,600 --> 01:06:53,120
Speaker 1: a couple months later, Me, James, Frankie, and her boyfriend,

1461
01:06:53,720 --> 01:06:56,760
Speaker 1: surprisingly James's housemaid from a Boar, decided to go clubbing,

1462
01:06:57,000 --> 01:06:58,920
Speaker 1: and she spends the evening telling me how much she

1463
01:06:58,960 --> 01:07:01,760
Speaker 1: missed me and wanted to be my friend again. I agreed.

1464
01:07:03,040 --> 01:07:05,000
Speaker 1: Lizzie told me the next day that Frankie had said

1465
01:07:05,040 --> 01:07:09,080
Speaker 1: that she only agreed to be neutral for James's sake. Yikes.

1466
01:07:09,320 --> 01:07:12,160
Speaker 1: Cut to summer, James invites me over for drinks. Me

1467
01:07:12,200 --> 01:07:14,720
Speaker 1: and Lizzie are still close as ever, and Frankie isn't

1468
01:07:14,720 --> 01:07:18,240
Speaker 1: speaking to me, but is insulting me to Lizzie, which

1469
01:07:18,280 --> 01:07:20,800
Speaker 1: Lizzie is then telling me, don't you just love that

1470
01:07:21,680 --> 01:07:24,200
Speaker 1: Frankie's your best friend, misses you so much that she's

1471
01:07:24,200 --> 01:07:25,840
Speaker 1: got to talk behind your back to one of your

1472
01:07:25,840 --> 01:07:28,880
Speaker 1: closest friends too. James tells me last minute that Frankie

1473
01:07:28,880 --> 01:07:32,120
Speaker 1: will be there too, que to me, sobbing to my parents,

1474
01:07:33,000 --> 01:07:36,280
Speaker 1: I decide to go and I'm going to brave it.

1475
01:07:37,520 --> 01:07:40,640
Speaker 1: Me and Frankie are shockingly getting on. She's talking about

1476
01:07:40,640 --> 01:07:42,880
Speaker 1: her boyfriend, and I am, in turn, trying to relate

1477
01:07:43,360 --> 01:07:47,640
Speaker 1: typical undiagnosed neurodivergence by speaking about the guy I'm currently

1478
01:07:47,720 --> 01:07:50,320
Speaker 1: talking to as well. She leaves and I stay with James.

1479
01:07:50,800 --> 01:07:53,000
Speaker 1: Lizzie tells me that Frankie's been saying that I only

1480
01:07:53,040 --> 01:07:55,320
Speaker 1: spoke about a guy I'm not even dating, and that

1481
01:07:55,400 --> 01:07:58,760
Speaker 1: she couldn't get a word in edgeways. Blah blah blah

1482
01:07:58,760 --> 01:08:01,840
Speaker 1: blah blah. She's still itching about me to Lizzy. From

1483
01:08:01,840 --> 01:08:05,760
Speaker 1: August to December, shock horror, James invites me to his

1484
01:08:05,960 --> 01:08:09,000
Speaker 1: for Halloween. I make a few mistakes and I'm so embarrassed.

1485
01:08:09,040 --> 01:08:11,800
Speaker 1: I profusely apologize to him both that night and also

1486
01:08:11,840 --> 01:08:15,080
Speaker 1: over text once I'm back home. Okay. In December, I

1487
01:08:15,120 --> 01:08:16,800
Speaker 1: text James asking me he wants to meet up for

1488
01:08:16,800 --> 01:08:19,080
Speaker 1: a couple of drinks for his birthday. First round on

1489
01:08:19,120 --> 01:08:21,719
Speaker 1: me type vibes and he says he is busy with family.

1490
01:08:21,840 --> 01:08:25,120
Speaker 1: So no, not a long message. It was more dry

1491
01:08:25,160 --> 01:08:27,759
Speaker 1: and it hurt my feelings a bit. I only got

1492
01:08:27,840 --> 01:08:30,200
Speaker 1: more hurt seeing that James and Frankie were out clubbing

1493
01:08:30,200 --> 01:08:33,599
Speaker 1: together in our hometown and at this point I still

1494
01:08:33,640 --> 01:08:38,120
Speaker 1: assume that Frankie actually partially liked me. Lol O P

1495
01:08:38,680 --> 01:08:42,360
Speaker 1: what are you doing? Why are you still seeing Frankie

1496
01:08:42,360 --> 01:08:44,519
Speaker 1: in the limelight? Why do you think Frankie's still your

1497
01:08:44,560 --> 01:08:48,360
Speaker 1: friend after he's talking mad crap about you? You're you're

1498
01:08:48,439 --> 01:08:50,960
Speaker 1: kind of being in ahel to yourself by like not

1499
01:08:51,000 --> 01:08:54,519
Speaker 1: confronting anything, not confronting her about any of this kind

1500
01:08:54,520 --> 01:08:57,880
Speaker 1: of irking is you're irking me? So you got to

1501
01:08:57,960 --> 01:09:02,000
Speaker 1: call out your friends. There're friends you can communicate. Oh well, Frankie,

1502
01:09:02,000 --> 01:09:04,920
Speaker 1: I don't know about Frankie, but you got to communicate.

1503
01:09:04,960 --> 01:09:07,840
Speaker 1: And also we don't know if Lizzie's talking, you know,

1504
01:09:07,960 --> 01:09:11,880
Speaker 1: talking behind your back. I don't like that. A few

1505
01:09:11,880 --> 01:09:15,200
Speaker 1: months later, minimal contact with Frankie and James is slipping

1506
01:09:15,240 --> 01:09:18,280
Speaker 1: off the radar. I am home for Easter and James

1507
01:09:18,320 --> 01:09:22,839
Speaker 1: refuses to see me again. This is fine. People get busy.

1508
01:09:23,000 --> 01:09:25,960
Speaker 1: I don't think that's him getting busy. James comes to

1509
01:09:26,000 --> 01:09:28,800
Speaker 1: my birthday this summer. Our whole friend group, including Frankie,

1510
01:09:28,960 --> 01:09:32,680
Speaker 1: were invited. Frankie speaks to Lizzie and goes, why the

1511
01:09:32,840 --> 01:09:35,120
Speaker 1: f would she even invite me to your crappy birthday?

1512
01:09:35,360 --> 01:09:37,760
Speaker 1: And at this point, I sense she's deliberately saying these

1513
01:09:37,800 --> 01:09:41,080
Speaker 1: things to Lizzie, knowing she'll come straight to me at

1514
01:09:41,080 --> 01:09:45,040
Speaker 1: my party. James tells me Frankie doesn't want anything to

1515
01:09:45,080 --> 01:09:47,080
Speaker 1: do with you or even to be in your vicinity,

1516
01:09:47,479 --> 01:09:50,040
Speaker 1: which is tough to hear from someone you consider a

1517
01:09:50,080 --> 01:09:53,320
Speaker 1: best friend like Frankie. Just messages me, Just message and

1518
01:09:53,360 --> 01:09:58,160
Speaker 1: tell me this again. Frankie is not your best friend.

1519
01:09:58,160 --> 01:10:00,639
Speaker 1: Stop saying she's your best friend. You keep she's enabling

1520
01:10:00,680 --> 01:10:03,320
Speaker 1: that in your brain. She's not your friend. She's talking

1521
01:10:03,360 --> 01:10:05,799
Speaker 1: so much crap about you and making your life so miserable.

1522
01:10:06,040 --> 01:10:08,800
Speaker 1: James and I agree this won't affect our friendship and

1523
01:10:08,880 --> 01:10:11,480
Speaker 1: agree we'll try to see each other over this Christmas,

1524
01:10:11,640 --> 01:10:15,800
Speaker 1: hence calling it a joint custody friendship. Ollol. I wasn't

1525
01:10:15,800 --> 01:10:18,080
Speaker 1: sure how else to word it. Lizzie and Me are speaking,

1526
01:10:18,160 --> 01:10:20,280
Speaker 1: and she says that Frankie has recently said to her

1527
01:10:20,360 --> 01:10:24,640
Speaker 1: that I forced her to be by in school. Me

1528
01:10:24,760 --> 01:10:27,160
Speaker 1: and James both came out, and she followed suit a

1529
01:10:27,200 --> 01:10:29,880
Speaker 1: couple years later because she said she felt the same way.

1530
01:10:30,320 --> 01:10:34,320
Speaker 1: No judgment of this change, because again I'm not really fussed, Like,

1531
01:10:34,400 --> 01:10:38,840
Speaker 1: who are you do whatever you want, and she felt

1532
01:10:38,840 --> 01:10:41,200
Speaker 1: pressured into kissing me, which I will say on record

1533
01:10:41,400 --> 01:10:45,040
Speaker 1: that was never true. If and when we kissed, she initiated,

1534
01:10:45,240 --> 01:10:48,000
Speaker 1: and she wanted me to be her first kiss. Okay,

1535
01:10:48,960 --> 01:10:52,360
Speaker 1: I just think Frankie doesn't like you. Just get away

1536
01:10:52,360 --> 01:10:55,680
Speaker 1: from her. I will admit I reacted immaturely here, but

1537
01:10:55,800 --> 01:10:57,920
Speaker 1: I had been patient with how she'd spoken about me

1538
01:10:58,200 --> 01:11:01,639
Speaker 1: for too long and I finally snapped, so I left

1539
01:11:01,640 --> 01:11:04,200
Speaker 1: our friend group chat. I posted on my TikTok something

1540
01:11:04,240 --> 01:11:06,760
Speaker 1: to the wording of when you find out someone has

1541
01:11:06,760 --> 01:11:09,040
Speaker 1: accused you of forcing them to be by and they

1542
01:11:09,120 --> 01:11:12,200
Speaker 1: kiss you. I think it was to be the back

1543
01:11:12,760 --> 01:11:17,360
Speaker 1: back backstabber audio, but I can't remember. Frankie sees I've

1544
01:11:17,400 --> 01:11:20,080
Speaker 1: left the group chat. She then checks my TikTok and

1545
01:11:20,120 --> 01:11:23,479
Speaker 1: she messages Lizzie, who's also sick of her crap at

1546
01:11:23,479 --> 01:11:25,599
Speaker 1: this point. By the way, I receive a long message

1547
01:11:25,600 --> 01:11:28,160
Speaker 1: from her saying goodbye essentially and that we apparently both

1548
01:11:28,200 --> 01:11:30,640
Speaker 1: know where in the wrong and she's just trying to

1549
01:11:30,680 --> 01:11:33,360
Speaker 1: do this to rile me up. I decide to hold

1550
01:11:33,400 --> 01:11:35,439
Speaker 1: fire and reply in the morning when I am sober,

1551
01:11:35,760 --> 01:11:37,800
Speaker 1: as I had been drinking with Lizzie. When she told

1552
01:11:37,800 --> 01:11:40,960
Speaker 1: me this, I respond back, essentially noting down everything I

1553
01:11:40,960 --> 01:11:43,880
Speaker 1: have written here, saying that I am not sorry and

1554
01:11:43,880 --> 01:11:46,800
Speaker 1: refuse to take equal joint responsibility for this crap show.

1555
01:11:47,920 --> 01:11:50,000
Speaker 1: And once again I will go on record to say

1556
01:11:50,040 --> 01:11:54,280
Speaker 1: I really really tried. At this point, she blocked me everywhere,

1557
01:11:54,560 --> 01:11:57,240
Speaker 1: so I couldn't send her a response. Yeah, no way,

1558
01:11:57,240 --> 01:12:00,719
Speaker 1: you're getting the final word, B word, say you're not sorry.

1559
01:12:00,960 --> 01:12:03,799
Speaker 1: So I logged into an old Instagram account copy pasted

1560
01:12:03,800 --> 01:12:06,360
Speaker 1: the message, said that I respected her and not wanting

1561
01:12:06,360 --> 01:12:08,320
Speaker 1: to be involved with me ever again, but that she

1562
01:12:08,439 --> 01:12:11,960
Speaker 1: needed to read this. Why just just stop talking to her.

1563
01:12:12,320 --> 01:12:14,200
Speaker 2: I think he's just trying to get the last win,

1564
01:12:14,560 --> 01:12:17,040
Speaker 2: like the last leg up, Like, oh you think so, No,

1565
01:12:17,120 --> 01:12:17,439
Speaker 2: I do.

1566
01:12:17,720 --> 01:12:20,320
Speaker 1: That's all it is. It's a petty argument between these two.

1567
01:12:20,640 --> 01:12:23,519
Speaker 1: That was August. Fast forward to now. I'm currently actually

1568
01:12:23,520 --> 01:12:26,599
Speaker 1: writing this on James's birthday, but have been thinking about

1569
01:12:26,600 --> 01:12:29,639
Speaker 1: it for the past week. Once again, I messaged James

1570
01:12:29,680 --> 01:12:32,400
Speaker 1: and asked if we wanted to meet for drinks. Initially,

1571
01:12:32,439 --> 01:12:35,040
Speaker 1: he sent a long message saying maybe if he's free.

1572
01:12:35,479 --> 01:12:37,800
Speaker 1: I told him there's no pressure if not. He then

1573
01:12:37,840 --> 01:12:40,599
Speaker 1: responded with a very short message saying that he's sorry,

1574
01:12:41,040 --> 01:12:46,439
Speaker 1: but it ain't gonna happen. So I was like, oh, okay, sick,

1575
01:12:46,800 --> 01:12:52,320
Speaker 1: no worries lol. Four days ago his bill was him

1576
01:12:52,640 --> 01:12:56,519
Speaker 1: at Frankie's house drinking together. And this is what led

1577
01:12:56,520 --> 01:12:59,439
Speaker 1: me to my question. Would I be the a hole

1578
01:12:59,439 --> 01:13:02,160
Speaker 1: for cutting off a friend of eleven years because our

1579
01:13:02,360 --> 01:13:06,280
Speaker 1: joint custody friendship isn't working? You can have your joint

1580
01:13:06,280 --> 01:13:12,799
Speaker 1: custody with us by going on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, searching

1581
01:13:12,880 --> 01:13:16,439
Speaker 1: Okay storytime and listening to stories just like this one,

1582
01:13:16,760 --> 01:13:20,400
Speaker 1: maybe better stories because OP doesn't understand what they're doing.

1583
01:13:21,040 --> 01:13:23,800
Speaker 1: Just cut it off. They're not your friends. I don't

1584
01:13:23,840 --> 01:13:26,360
Speaker 1: know what you think like you've been thinking, oh yeah,

1585
01:13:26,520 --> 01:13:29,080
Speaker 1: they talk behind my back, they hang out behind my back.

1586
01:13:29,320 --> 01:13:32,559
Speaker 1: Those aren't your friends. Just you should have been done

1587
01:13:32,560 --> 01:13:35,679
Speaker 1: with these people a long time ago, especially Frankie. You're

1588
01:13:35,680 --> 01:13:36,719
Speaker 1: being the a hole right.

1589
01:13:36,640 --> 01:13:37,840
Speaker 2: Now, you really are.

1590
01:13:38,479 --> 01:13:41,280
Speaker 1: James has been caught in the crossfire, but he's equally

1591
01:13:41,360 --> 01:13:43,880
Speaker 1: not making much effort to try and still be my friend.

1592
01:13:44,360 --> 01:13:44,880
Speaker 3: Just stop.

1593
01:13:45,040 --> 01:13:47,640
Speaker 1: Oh my god, you're defending him. I can't help but

1594
01:13:47,640 --> 01:13:50,479
Speaker 1: feel that, despite seeing at my birthday, he wouldn't pick sides.

1595
01:13:50,880 --> 01:13:54,639
Speaker 1: He has, in fact shows in a side this is okay,

1596
01:13:54,800 --> 01:13:56,920
Speaker 1: but I would rather he told me straight up than

1597
01:13:57,040 --> 01:14:00,120
Speaker 1: leave me guessing. I'm sorry if it's so long. I

1598
01:14:00,120 --> 01:14:02,640
Speaker 1: feel like I partially needed to vent the situation anonymously

1599
01:14:03,000 --> 01:14:04,439
Speaker 1: as well as ask if I would be the a

1600
01:14:04,520 --> 01:14:06,200
Speaker 1: hole for cutting his friendship off.

1601
01:14:06,720 --> 01:14:06,880
Speaker 2: Edit.

1602
01:14:07,080 --> 01:14:09,559
Speaker 1: Just want to add that throughout all of this, James

1603
01:14:09,560 --> 01:14:11,559
Speaker 1: has been on the sidelines, not really telling either of

1604
01:14:11,600 --> 01:14:14,240
Speaker 1: us to stop fighting. That's your edit to add. He's

1605
01:14:14,280 --> 01:14:20,000
Speaker 1: picked a side, girl, Ope, he's picked aside. Yeah, he's

1606
01:14:20,040 --> 01:14:22,080
Speaker 1: avoided you so many times, like oh, I can't get

1607
01:14:22,160 --> 01:14:24,160
Speaker 1: drinks with you, and then you see on his story

1608
01:14:24,160 --> 01:14:25,640
Speaker 1: that he's getting drinks of Frankie.

1609
01:14:25,800 --> 01:14:30,040
Speaker 2: Come on, dude, O B. I understand you want them

1610
01:14:30,080 --> 01:14:32,800
Speaker 2: back in your life, but you have to accept these

1611
01:14:32,800 --> 01:14:35,439
Speaker 2: are the things that are. This is what's just gonna happen,

1612
01:14:36,360 --> 01:14:38,080
Speaker 2: and I'm just move on.

1613
01:14:38,640 --> 01:14:41,519
Speaker 1: Thank you. Just let them let him go. I'm scared

1614
01:14:41,520 --> 01:14:44,160
Speaker 1: that Lizzie's going to join their friend group and then

1615
01:14:44,200 --> 01:14:47,840
Speaker 1: you have no friends. Yeah, but oh in this in

1616
01:14:47,880 --> 01:14:49,840
Speaker 1: the story, op, you kind of were the a hole.

1617
01:14:49,840 --> 01:14:54,000
Speaker 1: There a holes, but all of your A holes everyone communicate.

1618
01:14:54,520 --> 01:14:58,599
Speaker 2: Just let James b okay, stop bickering at him, let him.

1619
01:14:58,520 --> 01:15:01,519
Speaker 1: Be, and that's the end of that story, ending of

1620
01:15:01,520 --> 01:15:04,559
Speaker 1: this episode. So if you love us, make sure to subscribe.

1621
01:15:04,600 --> 01:15:07,120
Speaker 1: We love you and Sorrow