Speaker 1: Right job all across the USC Compton, Watts Bay to
Speaker 1: l A. Come on the California the Valley. We represent
Speaker 1: that kind of county. So if you're keeping it rail
Speaker 1: on your side of your town, you tune into Gangster
Speaker 1: Chronicles Chronic Goals. We're gonna tell you how we go.
Speaker 1: If I lie my nose a girl like Pinocchio, We're
Speaker 1: gonna tell you the truth and nothing but the truth.
Speaker 1: Gangster Chronicals. This is not your average show. You're now
Speaker 1: tuned into the rail m C A, Bick James and
Speaker 1: bixtails from the streets. Hello, Welcome to the Gangster Chronicles podcast,
Speaker 1: the production of My Heart Radio and Black Effect Podcast Network.
Speaker 1: Make sure you download the I Heart Apple, subscribe to
Speaker 1: the Gangster Chronicles for my Apple users, hit the Purple
Speaker 1: Michael your front screen, subscribe to the gainst the Chronicles
Speaker 1: and leave a five star rate in the comment. We
Speaker 1: like to welcome every one to another episode against the
Speaker 1: Chronicles podcast. You know with my player partner Jake, and
Speaker 1: once again m C eight is out there with the
Speaker 1: kids at football practice, but he promised his return his Monday,
Speaker 1: So y'all joined me and letting them know that we're
Speaker 1: giving them a knuckle sandwich if you don't show back,
Speaker 1: if I'm just playing. But he to taking care of
Speaker 1: the babies, and um, we don't talk about it much
Speaker 1: on this show where you guys know we all fathers,
Speaker 1: but we never talked about the relationships that we have
Speaker 1: with our daughters, which is very important because you got daughter, James, correct. Yeah.
Speaker 1: Was the relationship with her always a little bit different
Speaker 1: than it was the boys. My daughter was my closest,
Speaker 1: you know what I'm saying, because I had the privilege
Speaker 1: of raising her for seven and a happy ish whenever mama,
Speaker 1: you know what's going through her issues, So it taught
Speaker 1: me a lot, you know. When man, it's crazy. When
Speaker 1: my daughter first started administration, I didn't know what the
Speaker 1: hell to do, So it was totally different for me
Speaker 1: and I straight freaked out. But just being there for that,
Speaker 1: you know what I'm saying, and I'm running to my
Speaker 1: sister then, man, what I wanted to do, you know
Speaker 1: what I'm saying, And they was like boy, calmed down. Boys. Yeah,
Speaker 1: but you know, just being around my you know, my daughter,
Speaker 1: you know, she was in the car with me every day.
Speaker 1: You know, when I was up in the hood, she
Speaker 1: was in the cala with me every day. Why her
Speaker 1: mama went to work, and when her mama went off
Speaker 1: and did her thing, she was with me every day.
Speaker 1: Your daughter is a real special, same thing with mine.
Speaker 1: Um I guess from the ages of like one six,
Speaker 1: I want to do everything with it. When she first
Speaker 1: went to school, I hadn't even drive and drop her off.
Speaker 1: I would walk with her up to hold her hand,
Speaker 1: hold her way to the class start. That's like I
Speaker 1: didn't I didn't want to let her go. And the
Speaker 1: reason I'm mentioning our relationships with our daughters and M.
Speaker 1: C eight has daughters as well. As we're here with
Speaker 1: Ms April Rick, he sees the author of the book
Speaker 1: teach them their worth. A father is his daughter's is love.
Speaker 1: How you doing, April? I'm fine, Well, I'm happy to
Speaker 1: be here. Sure now you we've been talking a little
Speaker 1: bit off camera, off the show and everything, and when
Speaker 1: you wrote this book, the thing that touched me with
Speaker 1: it is that you said that dad is his daughter's
Speaker 1: first love exactly, and that goes so and I started
Speaker 1: thinking about the dynamic between fathers and daughters. It's usually, however,
Speaker 1: the dady use that's the type of um man that
Speaker 1: the daughter winds up hooking up with. Right in some ways, Yeah,
Speaker 1: some ways we like for instance, it's not so much
Speaker 1: it's because you're never gonna find a man like your father. Never,
Speaker 1: It's impossible. I've been told that you're looking for a
Speaker 1: man like your father. No, I'm not looking. I'll never
Speaker 1: find one exactly like my father. But those qualities is
Speaker 1: what we're looking for, those qualities that our father have.
Speaker 1: Is what if you have a good father, a loving
Speaker 1: and karen father, all the qualities that he has, of
Speaker 1: the qualities that you're gonna look for and are liustions ship,
Speaker 1: Yeah exactly. And that's the thing, you know, And I
Speaker 1: thought about the reversal of that too, you know, because
Speaker 1: you have women that have issues, um like you know,
Speaker 1: the sisters that may be out there doing their things,
Speaker 1: selling their bodies, um the ones that may run into
Speaker 1: drug addiction or either into intive abusive relationships too. So
Speaker 1: it kind of works both ways. Would you say something
Speaker 1: blaming it on the father's shand is the father fulk
Speaker 1: that she's out there like that? You know, it's not
Speaker 1: it's not all but his fault because people make choices,
Speaker 1: but he's a big part. He could be a big
Speaker 1: part of the reason. What happens when you have a father,
Speaker 1: that dude that does everything, and then the mama breaks off,
Speaker 1: father breaks off the relationship with mama, and now the
Speaker 1: baby becomes upon. You can't see your baby if you
Speaker 1: don't this and that, if you don't this, the child
Speaker 1: supports ship. Um, come on, man, it's you know, some
Speaker 1: fathers can be fathers. Because you have too many mothers
Speaker 1: out there that's worried about something that exactly and a
Speaker 1: lot of those women they have something's wrong that they
Speaker 1: probably didn't have a father because they don't understand. Otherwise
Speaker 1: they would understand the dynamics that James is talking about.
Speaker 1: It wouldn't be that way. They would understand how important
Speaker 1: it is for him to be in his daughter's life
Speaker 1: or who whatever, man, who, whichever, whoever it is, they
Speaker 1: would understand that it's important. You can't use a child
Speaker 1: as a pond, you know, it's not gonna get you anywhere. Ultimately,
Speaker 1: is just hurting the child. No, you can't. But you
Speaker 1: know you have those girls and we all knew them
Speaker 1: girls in high school that was like known for kind
Speaker 1: of being kind of promiscuous, a lot of those girls
Speaker 1: that knew there was like that had issues with their
Speaker 1: father or either had abandonment issues, their fathers wasn't at
Speaker 1: home with them, their fathers was locked up, and stuff
Speaker 1: like that. So I think ultimately a lot of women
Speaker 1: may find themselves trying to replace that father figure, and
Speaker 1: they do. You are absolutely right. Norm a lot of women,
Speaker 1: especially dogs, that are promiscuous. A lot of the reasons why,
Speaker 1: it's because as they're looking for they're trying to understand.
Speaker 1: They don't know. They didn't have nobody to model what
Speaker 1: a man was, so they had to try to create
Speaker 1: that man in their own head and figure out, Okay,
Speaker 1: is this what a man? Is? This what a man
Speaker 1: is supposed to be, even controlling man. Some women think
Speaker 1: that controlling means he loves me, you know, they think that.
Speaker 1: I've been told that before by women, that well, he
Speaker 1: loves me. You know, I didn't. I thought that that's
Speaker 1: what a man was supposed to do. You know, I'm
Speaker 1: supposed to do these things. I'm supposed to do whatever
Speaker 1: he says. But a lot of them have told me
Speaker 1: that the reason why they dealt with certain situations is
Speaker 1: because they had to figure out what a man was.
Speaker 1: They didn't have a father at home to teach him that.
Speaker 1: So you know, fathers get the bad end of the
Speaker 1: stick here because you know and and and let just say, father,
Speaker 1: ain't there. What's the strength of a black woman? Don't
Speaker 1: you know what I'm saying, Marty step up and she's
Speaker 1: gonna take care of flock, right, So what what what?
Speaker 1: What daddy don't teach mama teaching? I had my mother
Speaker 1: raised five and her three sons and and and one
Speaker 1: daughter was bad in the streets, hanging, but my mama
Speaker 1: still did it. You feel me. My mama taught me
Speaker 1: a lot of street ship. She made me understand a
Speaker 1: lot of things, even with our problems. So that's what
Speaker 1: I'm saying, a black woman, the strength of a black woman,
Speaker 1: you can't measure that, you feel me, because she's so many,
Speaker 1: so many ways. It's so many things to her. Yeah,
Speaker 1: they do make a lot of stuff. Shake um on
Speaker 1: one thing that he was amazing. I ain't gonna get
Speaker 1: too much off topic about the black women is like
Speaker 1: I thought about it one day, I said, man, how
Speaker 1: does somebody manage you know, they gotta pay for their rent.
Speaker 1: That might be in California, it could be eight dollars
Speaker 1: for one bed in my apartment, right and you may
Speaker 1: have two kids with a due. It ain't that it's
Speaker 1: non existent. That's not helping nothing financially. They gotta get
Speaker 1: took care of. They need food, clothing, and shelter. And
Speaker 1: you wondered sometimes and they may be working a couple
Speaker 1: of jobs and taking care of the kids on top
Speaker 1: of that. And usually it's a grandma somewhere in the
Speaker 1: cut helping out. So then you got another black woman
Speaker 1: the background is, you know, helping to make stuff possible.
Speaker 1: But you know, we're not talking about those type of situations.
Speaker 1: We're talking about the situations to where because sometimes a
Speaker 1: father can all that leads to it. Though, norm everything
Speaker 1: we're talking about leads to this book because and some
Speaker 1: of the situations we can be fathers because of the mother.
Speaker 1: You know, I'm saying and and being a parent that
Speaker 1: there is totally different from forty years ago, fifty years ago,
Speaker 1: you know, And I can speak for myself being a father,
Speaker 1: and I'm in the streets. I gave the streets more
Speaker 1: time than I did, you know, with my son, with
Speaker 1: my first kid, and then when my second one came Okay,
Speaker 1: solow down a little bit. The third one came, Okay,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna cut to Jered Carroll. I'm gonna move and
Speaker 1: I'm gonna try to do this, but no serious talk.
Speaker 1: You know, I'm speaking from experience being a father. I
Speaker 1: gave everything I had, I gave my last I went
Speaker 1: out there robbing and steel to get what they didn't have.
Speaker 1: And then at the end of the day, when your
Speaker 1: kids grow up, you and I thought I taught my
Speaker 1: daughter everything. I thought she was gonna be the coldest
Speaker 1: book that walked around. You know what I'm saying, because
Speaker 1: I always told my daughter, you don't want no man
Speaker 1: like your daddy. You don't want no man like your uncle's.
Speaker 1: This is it right here. You see how your daddy
Speaker 1: and your uncle's is. You turn your head and run.
Speaker 1: You feel me? So, you know, thinking that she understands
Speaker 1: when when when I released her, when I let her
Speaker 1: go back to her mother, after the time I had
Speaker 1: with her and spent with her, she got pregnant and
Speaker 1: I didn't even know it. I'm you know, I'm like, damn,
Speaker 1: where did I go wrong on that one? But she
Speaker 1: just wanted to be what her daddy was, what her
Speaker 1: mama was, and she daddy was her first love, and
Speaker 1: she just went gangster. You know, my daughter would fight boys,
Speaker 1: she wouldn't fight girls, you know what I'm saying. So
Speaker 1: it hurt me to lose my daughter to the system,
Speaker 1: the same system I went through. You feel me, So
Speaker 1: I didn't know how to relate to that. Right now
Speaker 1: on the day I can't talk to you on the phone,
Speaker 1: and these people saying you are talking to her made
Speaker 1: in the correctional I have sucked that. I don't. I
Speaker 1: wanted more for my daughter, but she felt victim to
Speaker 1: the street, just like I did. So I always you
Speaker 1: always tell me too. You feel like if your daughter
Speaker 1: would have stayed, your company stayed, she would have been
Speaker 1: everything would have been. I would have had her planet.
Speaker 1: I'd have had her planet. But it's never too late.
Speaker 1: You can still do it now. She come home, like
Speaker 1: I said, when she come home and get out of prison.
Speaker 1: I went to prison one time and I realized it
Speaker 1: wasn't for me. So it's damn soon not gonna be
Speaker 1: a career for her. You know what I'm saying. I
Speaker 1: got her. I'm not dealing with this jail ship. I'm
Speaker 1: not been Uh pamp you because you knew better. And
Speaker 1: just like when I went to prison, I didn't have
Speaker 1: my mom and daddy. You know what I'm saying. I
Speaker 1: had my son mother, and thank God for her, I
Speaker 1: was good. I was comfortable in prison. I had my
Speaker 1: levis and my tennis shoes and my packages, you know
Speaker 1: what I'm saying. And and long as her mama doing that, Okay,
Speaker 1: I'm cool. So I'm just waiting on her date so
Speaker 1: maybe I can come back in her life and be
Speaker 1: her father at a years old, nine years old, I'm
Speaker 1: still your daddy, Still got time. It's never too late, never.
Speaker 1: I mean, you know this, this right here is is
Speaker 1: It's a lot. This is where. This is where I mean,
Speaker 1: this is a topic that touched me because my daughter
Speaker 1: not here. You know what I'm saying with me physically,
Speaker 1: you know what I'm saying. And when she come home,
Speaker 1: I don't know how mad Am. I am I going
Speaker 1: to act like a kid in in a chockolate factory. Am.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna be happy that she home. No, I want
Speaker 1: to see how my daughter grew orf or if her
Speaker 1: situation made her grow, you know what I'm saying. But
Speaker 1: I can only be her father. You know what I'm
Speaker 1: saying to start from today about yesterday, what happened yesterday.
Speaker 1: It starts when she comes on. You know, with all
Speaker 1: that being said, you don't heard these two men's perspectives
Speaker 1: on everything. What was your inspiration to write this book? Okay, well,
Speaker 1: recently I lost my father in October. I lost my father.
Speaker 1: He was my hero um and I had been rying
Speaker 1: many of many books. I've always been wanted to be
Speaker 1: a writer. I wanted to write books, screenplays, and I
Speaker 1: started like maybe four But when he passed away, I
Speaker 1: just had this desire to tell my story, you know,
Speaker 1: to help other to help other daughters and other fathers
Speaker 1: understand the importance because, like I told Norman James earlier,
Speaker 1: we don't hear that we always hear about mothers. Now,
Speaker 1: this is not to bass mothers at all. We're talking
Speaker 1: about fathers today. Mothers always gonna be on, you know,
Speaker 1: I mean, come on, Mother's Day is one of the
Speaker 1: biggest holidays, you know, But fathers need to understand how
Speaker 1: important they are. So the reason why I wrote the
Speaker 1: book was because my father was such He made such
Speaker 1: an impact in my life as a little girl, adolescent
Speaker 1: and woman still to this day. It's a lot of
Speaker 1: decisions that I make based on what I dealt with
Speaker 1: with my father, his wisdom, him his lessons, you know,
Speaker 1: the care that he gave me, the attention that he
Speaker 1: showed me. It's very important. And like I was saying,
Speaker 1: it's never too late to do that. So this was
Speaker 1: my inspiration. Also, there's daughters out there that didn't have
Speaker 1: a father. James just mentioned that. What about and then
Speaker 1: also what about the daughters who mothers don't want the
Speaker 1: fathers to see them? Well, we got to change that.
Speaker 1: That's not good because it's not about you and the
Speaker 1: and the and your boyfriend or your husband. It's about
Speaker 1: your child. We gotta put them first. Because that girl
Speaker 1: or that that girl we're talking about, we an' talking
Speaker 1: about boys, but I'm just gonna mention them too. They're
Speaker 1: gonna grow up to be adults one day, you know,
Speaker 1: and they need to understand where how to be or
Speaker 1: he needs to understand how to be a man. And
Speaker 1: she needs to understand what a woman should deal with,
Speaker 1: how much a woman should take. And that's what a
Speaker 1: father teaches your daughter. He doesn't teach her how to
Speaker 1: be a lady. He teaches her how to be treated,
Speaker 1: how she should be treated, you know, and so it is,
Speaker 1: you know, all right, hold on, hold on, let's drop
Speaker 1: a commercial real quick. We gotta pay some bills in here.
Speaker 1: How do you father to teach his daughter how to
Speaker 1: be a woman. He can't mother teaches you, you know,
Speaker 1: your mother, like norm said, your grandmother. Because some of
Speaker 1: us didn't have our mothers or our fathers, you know,
Speaker 1: but we might have somebody. Anybody has always had somebody
Speaker 1: in their life. I'm sure that they looked up to
Speaker 1: whether it was a grandmother, big mama, big daddy, me ma.
Speaker 1: You know so, April, you're telling me that I can't
Speaker 1: instill in my daughter whether a woman should be or
Speaker 1: the type of just say advances. I want a specific woman,
Speaker 1: you know what I'm saying. I can't explain to my
Speaker 1: daughter what type of woman I want to reflect on her,
Speaker 1: just for her to just say, yeah, my daddy wanted
Speaker 1: a woman like that. I want a man that wants
Speaker 1: a woman, not a boy that wants to just play around.
Speaker 1: That he can daughter, Well, you know what you can
Speaker 1: teach well, you know you you really can't. What you
Speaker 1: can do is teach your your your whole role in
Speaker 1: your daughter's life is to teach her what her worth
Speaker 1: is, is is, to teach her what self respect is, to
Speaker 1: teach her how the difference between a man that you
Speaker 1: got to stand at the door with your shotgun with
Speaker 1: or a man that's gonna come into that house and
Speaker 1: respect your daughter and you, and when and how you
Speaker 1: want him to take care of your daughter? You know,
Speaker 1: who cares about that, that's what you want. So to
Speaker 1: answer the question as far as teaching her what kind
Speaker 1: of woman she should be, you you want to teach
Speaker 1: her that by the way you treat her. That's how
Speaker 1: she's gonna know what kind of man she should deal with.
Speaker 1: She's gonna know that by the way her father treats her.
Speaker 1: You know, if he if he says, if he communicates
Speaker 1: with her. It's really important that you sit down to
Speaker 1: communicate with your daughter. Don't judge her, don't talk at her,
Speaker 1: talk to her, you know, um, let her know that
Speaker 1: you you you want to know what's going on in
Speaker 1: her life. I talked to a lot of men, and
Speaker 1: even my doctor recently told me, what you brought a book?
Speaker 1: What is it about? I told him it's something called
Speaker 1: teach them of their work. You know. He's like, well,
Speaker 1: what is that about. I told him. He's like, oh
Speaker 1: my god, I need one of them. I'm dealing with
Speaker 1: girls right now that they have boyfriends, and every sense
Speaker 1: they got boyfriends, they don't deal with me no more.
Speaker 1: I don't know what's going on. The communication ain't there,
Speaker 1: you know, and I want to know what's going on.
Speaker 1: I still want them to know that, you know, I'm
Speaker 1: still their daddy, you know. So I told him sit
Speaker 1: down and talk to him. The best thing you could
Speaker 1: do is start asking them about the guy that they're
Speaker 1: dealing with, you know, so you can learn more about
Speaker 1: them and make sure they're being treated right. That's a
Speaker 1: hard rule for That's a hard peal for day to swallow,
Speaker 1: because I know, prior to my little girl, you know,
Speaker 1: coming of age, I always said she but not ever
Speaker 1: had no boyfriend when you and so when she did
Speaker 1: get one, I didn't feel I got thoughts gonna beat
Speaker 1: because I saw the way the young man was and
Speaker 1: he had good parents. The thing that struck me good
Speaker 1: with him was his parents cared about him like I
Speaker 1: care about my daughter. So if he was over there,
Speaker 1: I was getting a call from Miss Pop saying are
Speaker 1: you home, Mr Steele, was my son is saying that
Speaker 1: you said it was cool he came over. I liked that,
Speaker 1: and I'd get advice versa. She said, she going over there,
Speaker 1: y'all at home, because I'm not gonna make it convenient
Speaker 1: for y'all to go make me no grandfather all earlier
Speaker 1: and stuff, you know what I mean. So I'm gonna
Speaker 1: make sure that we don't get y'all to me the
Speaker 1: my opportunities, you know what I mean. But my daughter,
Speaker 1: and she really liked this young man, but she decided
Speaker 1: to transfer schools for her senior year and he graduated
Speaker 1: last year, and it was a situation when she told him,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna transfer over here because of this, this and
Speaker 1: the third. You know, he made a big deal with
Speaker 1: why are you going over there? I don't want you
Speaker 1: to go over there because this, this and that, and
Speaker 1: she said, but what are you saying about me? She
Speaker 1: was really offending, and she broke up with him. I'm
Speaker 1: talking about crying the whole first two days and everything.
Speaker 1: But she says, I can't beat with nobody that would
Speaker 1: just stopped me from stop me from doing whatout doing.
Speaker 1: And then she said she felt that that was disrespectful
Speaker 1: because she said, you know, what are you telling me?
Speaker 1: You think? I'm like, like, why would I be because
Speaker 1: it's boys over there, boys everywhere exactly. But she didn't
Speaker 1: like that, you know, because she she I ain't gonna
Speaker 1: let no relationship at this time. The only seventeen tell
Speaker 1: me that I shouldn't get education and I shouldn't go
Speaker 1: where I think it's best for me to get. So boy,
Speaker 1: going about your business, let me hand my business, and
Speaker 1: I about the relationship later. And you know, I missed
Speaker 1: the ear hustle right at night because you can hear everything,
Speaker 1: you know, because she wasn't talked to him, and then
Speaker 1: you know, I hear to find what like, you know,
Speaker 1: she talked to him and then she got him kind
Speaker 1: of on the speaker, so I can hear everything he's saying.
Speaker 1: So I'm staying out the door. He's like, well, I'm
Speaker 1: just gonna go to the army because I love you
Speaker 1: so much. I don't know. And he said, that's fine.
Speaker 1: If you do that and it's gonna make you a
Speaker 1: better person, go do it, but don't do it for me.
Speaker 1: Do that for yourself. Oh good, he said, And I said, okay,
Speaker 1: I and that's a lot of times as a father,
Speaker 1: because you know, it's a lot of pops out that
Speaker 1: it's real strict with their daughters. I just know, to me,
Speaker 1: that's the wrong way to do stuff because I don't
Speaker 1: want my kids ever to sneak and do ship. That's
Speaker 1: for people getting drunk. I don't want to. I want
Speaker 1: them to be able to communication. So if you got
Speaker 1: a boyfriend, yeah, I would rather have a little boyfriend
Speaker 1: over at my house where I keep buying on them
Speaker 1: and look at him on my phone from upstairs like, yeah,
Speaker 1: you're gonna sitting a little too closely and telling the
Speaker 1: move over a little bit to the left. You know,
Speaker 1: I would I would rather be able to see you
Speaker 1: and have you in my house and have you around. Sure,
Speaker 1: I take you all the movies and you know where
Speaker 1: my daughter is at, versus me telling them all you
Speaker 1: can't do that. It's like you don't know which your
Speaker 1: key is capable of exactly. Sure, would you agree that
Speaker 1: is really not the kids because your daughter is gonna
Speaker 1: act out. It starts with the mother of the father, definitely,
Speaker 1: you know what I'm saying. Definitely starts with the mother
Speaker 1: and the father, And like these days, we got mommy
Speaker 1: tworking with their daughters, Mommy on the motor shackle shape
Speaker 1: with their daughters exactly. And see, and those mothers are
Speaker 1: the ones that that us that no better. If you
Speaker 1: know somebody like that, you need to put their crown
Speaker 1: is falling off. You need to help them slide it
Speaker 1: back on and from sliding back on, because queens do
Speaker 1: raise queens. James has talked about what about a mother,
Speaker 1: what about a single mother? I was a single mother,
Speaker 1: you know, I had a boy. But still it was
Speaker 1: you know, it was difficult, you know, trying to raise
Speaker 1: a boy. But queen's race queen. So to answer james question,
Speaker 1: you can't have a queen without having a king. There
Speaker 1: was a king somewhere, Okay, whether that king, whether that
Speaker 1: queen was taught by her grandmother, her auntie, or whoever,
Speaker 1: a friend of the family, whoever it was, she still
Speaker 1: a woman still has the ability. I'm not saying that
Speaker 1: you if you don't have a father, you you out
Speaker 1: of luck. You know, I'm not saying and that that's
Speaker 1: not what the book is about. That's why one of
Speaker 1: the chapters in the book specifically talks about daughters fatherless
Speaker 1: daughters because we gotta be there for them. You know,
Speaker 1: those are the ones that Norman was talking about that
Speaker 1: sometimes don't understand what love, what true love is, what
Speaker 1: love looks like, what love sounds like. They don't understand
Speaker 1: that they're trying to figure it out, any kind of
Speaker 1: dealing with all kind of stuff. When we recognize that,
Speaker 1: we gotta help him. It's our duty as women to
Speaker 1: help one another. It's a father's duty when he sees
Speaker 1: his daughter is her crown has fallen off that he puts.
Speaker 1: He put that invisible crown on her the day she
Speaker 1: was born. And that's what I try I'm trying to
Speaker 1: get fathers to realize in my book. That was another
Speaker 1: reason why I wrote the book. I had an imaginary
Speaker 1: crown on my head. Nobody could see it, but I
Speaker 1: knew it was there. I mean, I got Valentine's Day
Speaker 1: candy for fifty three years of my life from my father.
Speaker 1: When when when I was getting it, I was happy.
Speaker 1: You know, I didn't think I was gonna be thinking
Speaker 1: about it now. You know, I didn't know that it
Speaker 1: was gonna impact my life the way it did the
Speaker 1: way it has now. So it's a lot of things
Speaker 1: he did for me. It's the small things. It's not
Speaker 1: always the product bags and the Gucci bags and Louis
Speaker 1: Batton's and all that. It ain't about that. It's the
Speaker 1: small things that matter. So yeah, and that's the truth
Speaker 1: right there. And the thing else, I realized to my
Speaker 1: daughter that I had a whole lot of influence on
Speaker 1: her because just seeing the way that she interacts, she
Speaker 1: carries herself and she has a certain confidence to herself
Speaker 1: that she's not going with nothing because she grew up
Speaker 1: watching me open the door for her motherly, you know,
Speaker 1: opened the door for her mother cooking. And you know
Speaker 1: I watched dishes too. I ain't We're not. My wife
Speaker 1: ain't going for that chauconistic stuff to worry, you know,
Speaker 1: because I do the majority of cooking, and I do
Speaker 1: something my wife to the majority to clean them. But
Speaker 1: I do some cleaning to my wife feels. You know,
Speaker 1: women get upset about the little miss things. You know,
Speaker 1: we leave a platon and sin. They'd walk around with
Speaker 1: an attitude and one you getting the whole fight, the
Speaker 1: whole weekend over over a couple of singing. You don't
Speaker 1: be oblivious to what the hell they're walking around mad about.
Speaker 1: You know, so I try to. Yeah, I try to
Speaker 1: be that example in the house. So would just you know,
Speaker 1: just keeping everything wondered. But I do get my place
Speaker 1: in the house is the man of the house, you
Speaker 1: know what I mean. But that don't mean I sit
Speaker 1: around because it's a lot of cats that I want
Speaker 1: that man respect. But don't do the man things. You
Speaker 1: can't be sitting on the couch all day playing video
Speaker 1: games and your wife going to work and you get home,
Speaker 1: Mr mom, you know what I mean, babysitting that. But
Speaker 1: you gotta you want to be the king, you gotta
Speaker 1: play the role. I said, y'all, y'all, y'all sound good
Speaker 1: and and and it's one hunting. But I'm for the
Speaker 1: fathers that got the raw deal. I'm for the fathers
Speaker 1: that can't be that king to their daughters. I'm for
Speaker 1: the fathers that get that. You know, a woman ago,
Speaker 1: she's so mad at you should go filed child put
Speaker 1: on you knowing you're a truck driver and you can't
Speaker 1: pay you goddamn bu our support to take your driver
Speaker 1: license now, and you took my manhood because I can't work.
Speaker 1: What I look like to my daughter? Now? You know
Speaker 1: what I'm saying. So it's like the system is here
Speaker 1: to break us down one way, whatever side of the
Speaker 1: track we get on, whatever corner we turned, you know,
Speaker 1: you can't win. But you got a lot of men
Speaker 1: out here that wants to be pops, wants to be
Speaker 1: your father to their kids, you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1: But you just have these women that that snatch them
Speaker 1: away from us, and we can't be So now all
Speaker 1: of thematically, automatically were dead beat to the world, to
Speaker 1: the society, to to these people that put it, put
Speaker 1: you on child support, the county, of the system, whatever
Speaker 1: the funk they want to call it. And I just
Speaker 1: think there's a lot of men out there that gets
Speaker 1: the raw fucking and we can't be father. And even
Speaker 1: with that, even with the child support stuff, you know,
Speaker 1: you feel you getta due. And I knew a kid
Speaker 1: that was going to work, and when I tell you,
Speaker 1: I don't know how he paid his bills, but it's
Speaker 1: like he only had like two or three hundred dollars
Speaker 1: left over in this check every week, ship, I gotta
Speaker 1: check for sixty nine dollars. You know what I did.
Speaker 1: I took off my ship and I quit. And I
Speaker 1: think it's one of the things to wear because I'm
Speaker 1: gonna tell your stuff. Wouldn't have worked out with me
Speaker 1: and my old lady. She wouldn't have to put no
Speaker 1: people on me because I will take care of myne regardless.
Speaker 1: And I think that's how she would be. And I
Speaker 1: think my wife, I know for a fact, she the type.
Speaker 1: She wouldn't go put no people on me, you know
Speaker 1: what I mean? She would be like, hey, you know what,
Speaker 1: that's a lot of women like that. But but let's okay,
Speaker 1: So what do we do when we have a If
Speaker 1: you have a woman that doesn't want you to see
Speaker 1: your child and the only way you're gonna see your
Speaker 1: child is if you go down to the child support
Speaker 1: building and tell them what you're gonna do. Are you
Speaker 1: going to just say forget it, I ain't gonna see
Speaker 1: the child, or are you gonna go down there and
Speaker 1: do what you have to do inspite it might be wrong.
Speaker 1: You know that she did you like that? But what
Speaker 1: do you think your daughter would have wanted you to do.
Speaker 1: I'm just saying if he was in a situation like
Speaker 1: that exactly exactly, the child support do whatever it is.
Speaker 1: It's it's you know, it's I mean, some women you
Speaker 1: have to do I know somebody dealing with that now,
Speaker 1: you know, and it's wrong. You shouldn't have to. You
Speaker 1: should be able to see your child whenever you want
Speaker 1: to see your child. So to me, when a man
Speaker 1: goes into a court room demanding to see his child,
Speaker 1: I can't. I know he's gonna get everything he's asking for.
Speaker 1: You know, that's that's a man. That's a man when
Speaker 1: he does that, that shuts down that woman because that's
Speaker 1: ignorant to use a child as a pond in the
Speaker 1: first place. So she deserves everything. She deserves, all of
Speaker 1: the holidays being taken away and all that. You know,
Speaker 1: when you want to take away your child from from
Speaker 1: somebody that's gonna teach them something, what happens because the
Speaker 1: woman ain't thinking about what's gonna happen there in life.
Speaker 1: She's just thinking about the love that she got for you,
Speaker 1: you know, which is crazy. You gotta put your child first,
Speaker 1: and child always conspire. So uh, those out there that
Speaker 1: they're doing that, and you know, I hope they start
Speaker 1: to to to rethink, you know, those ways, because it's
Speaker 1: it's not good. All right, Let's take a quick commercial break,
Speaker 1: we'll be back. It's something I want people to rethink too,
Speaker 1: because she's kinging a keyword, right and this is all
Speaker 1: off Basically, I gotta talk about it, you know, ritual,
Speaker 1: the vitamins I've been taking and I almost all his weight. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I'm looking good and everything, man, you know, because yeah
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Speaker 1: especially when it comes to something we're gonna take every day.
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Speaker 1: Thing I like about I only gotta take two peals
Speaker 1: a day. It ain't a whole bunch of peals I
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Speaker 1: and forward last GC want to want to start your
Speaker 1: rich for today. That's I just wanted to throw that
Speaker 1: out there for y'all. Regularly scheduled programming. Alright, So yeah,
Speaker 1: you know, another thing at another subject I want to
Speaker 1: get on in two and and and kind of cover
Speaker 1: that's in my book where I talked about the respect.
Speaker 1: You know, how a father teaches a daughter self respect,
Speaker 1: self esteem, Uh, A lot of daughters, you know, they're suffering.
Speaker 1: We have a lot of daughters that are suffering from
Speaker 1: like me. For instance, when I was younger, like I
Speaker 1: put this in, you know, I wanted to be a
Speaker 1: little personal in my book. So I had to tell
Speaker 1: little stories about my own life and things challenges that
Speaker 1: I had, you know. One of them was I wanted
Speaker 1: to gain weight. I wanted a big booty and big
Speaker 1: helps like all my other friends, you know. And I
Speaker 1: remember talking about that, talking to my father about it,
Speaker 1: telling them I need to get I don't know why
Speaker 1: I'm so little. My father would always tell me, beauty
Speaker 1: isn't then the eye of the beholder. You wanna be
Speaker 1: all right, you know, way to come on when it
Speaker 1: when it comes on, rush it, you know, and if
Speaker 1: it doesn't, embrace who you are the way God made you.
Speaker 1: Even tell me all these little things, you know, But
Speaker 1: still I listened when I was younger. But once I
Speaker 1: got into boys, things changed. I started get taking you know,
Speaker 1: using drastic bedrooms. Like one day I met somebody that
Speaker 1: told me I gained weight off of these pills. I said,
Speaker 1: what kind of pills? Some some type of pills that
Speaker 1: were turned out to be for psychiatric patients patients. I'm sorry,
Speaker 1: but I started taking these pills to gain weight, started
Speaker 1: gaining weight, eating all I mean, eating the house up.
Speaker 1: My mother swore I was smoking marijuana, but I was
Speaker 1: taking these pills. All of a sudden, my feet start tingling,
Speaker 1: hand started tingling, strands of hair started coming out. I'm like,
Speaker 1: what's going on? I got scared? Who did? I go
Speaker 1: to my father? Because that's what we do when we
Speaker 1: have fathers that we communicate with, that communicate back with
Speaker 1: as well, that's who we go to. There are heroes.
Speaker 1: My father was everything he I felt like he knew.
Speaker 1: He was a doctor, a lawyer, a teacher, everything, you know.
Speaker 1: So I went to him, taught him, Dad, I'm taking
Speaker 1: these pills, you know were told him what I was doing.
Speaker 1: He said what, So he talked to me about it.
Speaker 1: Tell me what kind of pills they were. Actually, that's
Speaker 1: how I found out they were appeals for a psychiatric
Speaker 1: patients patients, and I stopped taking the pills. So I'm
Speaker 1: just saying all that to say that fathers need to
Speaker 1: tell that they're the ones that when they tell their
Speaker 1: daughter that she's beautiful. No other man is gonna be
Speaker 1: able to tell her that she's not. When they tell
Speaker 1: their daughter that you are worth more than gold, you are,
Speaker 1: you know, hold your head up high, keep yourself esteem high.
Speaker 1: No matter what mistakes you make in life. No man
Speaker 1: is gonna be able to tell to tell her different.
Speaker 1: So she's gonna value herself. That's what fathers teach daughters.
Speaker 1: Another another something with Norman me about the reason why
Speaker 1: I wrote the book too. I remembered when I started
Speaker 1: writing a book, when Kobe Bryant died, a lot of
Speaker 1: basketball players, football players, all kind of entertainers were talking
Speaker 1: about how they wanted to they were pleasing to be
Speaker 1: girl dad's. And I thought that was beautiful. You know,
Speaker 1: that that his you know, his influence on them and
Speaker 1: and how he was with his daughters. It inspired others
Speaker 1: to want to do the same, even the fans and
Speaker 1: other people. So um I applauded them for for wanting
Speaker 1: to be better fathers to their daughters and be girl dads,
Speaker 1: you know, because it's very important because, like I said,
Speaker 1: a father teaches his daughter her word all day long,
Speaker 1: you know. And if you got a daddy that some
Speaker 1: some women have daddies, that's in the house, but still
Speaker 1: ain't a daddy. You know I've talked. Yeah, they're absence.
Speaker 1: So the book is, you know, for the incarcerated father,
Speaker 1: because you still and be a father. You can make
Speaker 1: phone calls. You still can call your daughter once a
Speaker 1: week to make sure she's doing Okay, do you need
Speaker 1: to talk to me about anything? How's your life going,
Speaker 1: you're dealing with any boys? What's going on? So he
Speaker 1: can get a field of what's you know, hopefully has
Speaker 1: a good relationship with the mother, so she can let
Speaker 1: him know what's going on. He can write to her.
Speaker 1: If he can't call her, he can write the military father,
Speaker 1: the single father, the father that's not in the house,
Speaker 1: the divorce father, stepfather, whoever it is. You have the
Speaker 1: ability to change your daughter's life. And sometimes you just
Speaker 1: got that daddy that that worked too much, that this
Speaker 1: ain't at home, that he seemed like he absently, but
Speaker 1: he works so much that when he come home, I'll
Speaker 1: want to do his crash sometimes exactly know what I'm saying. Yeah,
Speaker 1: and that's and that's absolutely that happens a lot. But
Speaker 1: even you know, the hard working man that's working them
Speaker 1: double still gotta understand that if you got a daughter,
Speaker 1: you gotta take some type of time out with her. Well,
Speaker 1: you know, one thing I don't like it, and it actually,
Speaker 1: you know, don't not to just get too personal with it,
Speaker 1: but I don't like. Yes, like, I got a daughter,
Speaker 1: this thing. You know, she's not big, but you know
Speaker 1: her mom is to always tell you need to lose weight,
Speaker 1: you need to be down this, need to be down that.
Speaker 1: And I kind of told my wife to chill out
Speaker 1: with that. I said, obviously these looks, you know, and
Speaker 1: like she ain't got a little boys that don't. You know.
Speaker 1: I just think sometimes stuff like that, if you're doing
Speaker 1: it for a health thing, you can't. But I think
Speaker 1: you can put stuff from people's head like that. Oh yeah,
Speaker 1: I agree. I believe in people eating like I don't
Speaker 1: believe in that started starving and putting little keys on
Speaker 1: diets and all that stuff. You know what I mean.
Speaker 1: I think they should just be able to just be
Speaker 1: who they are. And you know, now, if it's a
Speaker 1: health thing, I don't think you should be able to
Speaker 1: be out there feeding your kid kool aid and you know,
Speaker 1: Hamburgers at Hamburger meet every day every hour. But I
Speaker 1: just think sometimes we just get so um, what's the
Speaker 1: word I'm looking for? Um, where we just get to
Speaker 1: the point where we start nitpicking that little thing. Sometimes
Speaker 1: it's bad for him. And you mentioned how important is
Speaker 1: it to have a girl where of self esteem is
Speaker 1: on point? It's very important because it affects her life
Speaker 1: and when when she becomes a woman, if you you
Speaker 1: got that's one that's one role and the father is
Speaker 1: really important that the father plays is increasing and doing
Speaker 1: whatever he can to encourage his daughter to always have
Speaker 1: a high level of self esteem. Because you have daughters
Speaker 1: out there that like just say you may be dark
Speaker 1: skinned it. You know, you got women as dark skinned
Speaker 1: it they feel like I'm too dark, you know because
Speaker 1: of the stigma that you know it it's been around
Speaker 1: and yeah something yeah you know, and and a lot
Speaker 1: of dark skinned women which you know, like they'll tell
Speaker 1: you stories about being how you know, Uh, he went
Speaker 1: for the light skinned one, you know, instead of coming
Speaker 1: to me. So he ended up with this one because
Speaker 1: she was smaller, a thinner. And so when you start
Speaker 1: doing your kids or not talking about yours norm but
Speaker 1: I'm just saying in general, when you it's been so
Speaker 1: important that if your daughter has dark skin, Tell her
Speaker 1: that she's beautiful, if she's if she's overweight, don't tell
Speaker 1: her that she's fat, you know, tell her do it,
Speaker 1: do it in another way, you know, maybe talk to
Speaker 1: her about health, you know, and making sure that you
Speaker 1: you know that you that you stay healthy, because it's
Speaker 1: so important. Because if your father tells you that, if
Speaker 1: your father is telling you that you're stupid, if he's
Speaker 1: telling you that you're too fat, if he's telling you
Speaker 1: that you got basking you need to work on it.
Speaker 1: What do you think it's gonna happen when she meets
Speaker 1: that man that starts selling her that me and my
Speaker 1: daughter beauty one is creeping to it, don't spot late night.
Speaker 1: Come on, mama, let's get us a donut. You know
Speaker 1: what I'm saying because I think it's very I think
Speaker 1: it's very important. I think sometimes we just get too pity. Yeah,
Speaker 1: we do, because you gotta understand that, you know, because
Speaker 1: when you do that, the tone that you're settings, it
Speaker 1: stays with him. It stays with a person when you
Speaker 1: especially from my father. I know that my mother was
Speaker 1: Certain things I can talk to my mother about, certain
Speaker 1: things I can talk to my father about. And I
Speaker 1: really feel like if my father ever, Like if I
Speaker 1: told my mother something about a guy that I was
Speaker 1: dealing with and she said, don't be stupid, I'm not
Speaker 1: gonna take it like I would have took it if
Speaker 1: my father would have told me, don't be stupid, you know,
Speaker 1: because I don't know what that is. I don't know
Speaker 1: what it is. I'd have to talk to a few
Speaker 1: other women about that. But it's something about when your
Speaker 1: mother says something like that, tell you versus your father
Speaker 1: or a man period. You know. Now, him telling me
Speaker 1: that I'm stupid is really gonna stick in there, like,
Speaker 1: oh my god, my dad think I'm stupid. My mother
Speaker 1: telling me I'm stupid, Well, I'm gonna be thinking like, Mama,
Speaker 1: why do you say that? You know what? I noticed
Speaker 1: sometimes because I don't get a twist that my wife
Speaker 1: is a loving woman to love and she don't be
Speaker 1: on my daughter like that. I'm just, you know, saying
Speaker 1: my thoughts are Sometimes the relationship with the mom and
Speaker 1: daughter can get a little complicated. I noticed when the
Speaker 1: daughter turned around sixteen seventeen, because you get complicated with
Speaker 1: the men and their boys. Because I know both my boys,
Speaker 1: I had to touch both of them up around that
Speaker 1: age when I'm had to touch him up when he
Speaker 1: was eighteen. The other one I had to touch him
Speaker 1: up sixteen seventeen because he thought he was Mr. Big Man. Yeah,
Speaker 1: exactly when we go to the same stuff. Women go
Speaker 1: through the same thing, the same thing, The same thing
Speaker 1: happens with my mother. We have a ready clause relationship.
Speaker 1: But at the same time, I guess I should say,
Speaker 1: like I said, a woman teaches you how to be
Speaker 1: a lady. Your mother teaches you how to be a lady.
Speaker 1: My mother taught me how to be a lady, and
Speaker 1: she told me how to when I needed to act
Speaker 1: a certain way one second we got he taught me
Speaker 1: how to do it anyway. So yeah, I mean it is,
Speaker 1: you know, daughters go through things with their mothers. It's
Speaker 1: just I don't know. I think it's because we're women.
Speaker 1: We're women. It's not like we're competing with one another
Speaker 1: or nothing like that. But you know, women understand women
Speaker 1: like me and understand women are from Mars, that the
Speaker 1: women are from Mars, and guys are definitely from being there. Yeah,
Speaker 1: because the thing is, you know, y'all go two things.
Speaker 1: You know, James, James that because I'm gonna tell you.
Speaker 1: I go to sleep. We go to bed on a
Speaker 1: Friday night, James don't have a perfect evening. I'm talking about.
Speaker 1: I don't took her out, you know, Friday night. You
Speaker 1: know how I do, lady take her out? We kicking.
Speaker 1: We go on our day. Now I make sure Friday
Speaker 1: nights everything Now we chicken had a good time night before,
Speaker 1: every something, everything I went on. I wake up a
Speaker 1: round eight or nine and she'd be looking at me. Man,
Speaker 1: I'll be wondering what if I've done between the time
Speaker 1: I went to bed and we've been sleep unless I'm
Speaker 1: sleepwalking to something and she won't never see what's going on,
Speaker 1: Like wait, what is that right there? Well, haven't you
Speaker 1: ever thought, just as a man, it could be the
Speaker 1: attention that she won't while y'all in the bed, you
Speaker 1: could just put put put your arm to me, but
Speaker 1: for your information attention And I thought you know everything
Speaker 1: was good just because you you have relations, don't mean
Speaker 1: it stops once you bust one. It starts, it continues.
Speaker 1: You you after let me say this and we way
Speaker 1: off of this. Where we at right now? It's the
Speaker 1: question we don't get one on the show to off.
Speaker 1: This woman asked, well, what a woman won't man? And
Speaker 1: you know, some of us brothers don't understand what a
Speaker 1: woman really wants when she in the bed. And ain't
Speaker 1: all that necessarily have to be touchy, touchy, lick licky.
Speaker 1: It just could be holding. You don't want to feel that, man,
Speaker 1: You know that the mores and just feel secure and
Speaker 1: when you do all that, because I'm gonna tell she's
Speaker 1: gonnawn up that. I'm gonna tell you something about if
Speaker 1: mine have a dream about something, I get the heat
Speaker 1: that then I find out later on that it was
Speaker 1: some crazy dream or something that happened. She went downstairs
Speaker 1: and saw a couple of sing They just throw off
Speaker 1: another just like kind of like, man, you tripping up
Speaker 1: and the probably won't even meet because if it's my
Speaker 1: oldest son, if it's my son, is he is, Oh,
Speaker 1: it's cool, ain't nothing to him and not and that
Speaker 1: I love when that happens. And I say, that wasn't
Speaker 1: even mine, that was he his, and then she gets
Speaker 1: looking like, oh it was him, It's okay. I said, okay,
Speaker 1: so you're showing favoritism with your baby boy, and that
Speaker 1: like love though that sound like y'all got a good
Speaker 1: relationship and shot the Yeah we're cool. You just need
Speaker 1: to go up a little little the extra mileth Now,
Speaker 1: you went to school with James, right when James went
Speaker 1: to school? When school, Yeah, James went to school. I
Speaker 1: went up there to hang out. He just came a lunchtime.
Speaker 1: Used to fight exactly when he went to school, when
Speaker 1: he came up there to fight. Because that's the more.
Speaker 1: Is that only the only time we seen you giants?
Speaker 1: Remember you walking to no classes? Never I walked to
Speaker 1: one class. The punky opened the door from me when
Speaker 1: oh boy was mentioning with her and she uh, I
Speaker 1: told her, I'm just gonna knock on the door, just
Speaker 1: come open me. And she opened the door from me.
Speaker 1: A little boy. Don't that as so? Man? Man, So
Speaker 1: let me ask you. You talked about your father's influence,
Speaker 1: and you went to high school and compter exactly. I'm
Speaker 1: pretty sure you didn't have no gang allegiance to nobody
Speaker 1: I had that. You know. I'm glad you mentioned this
Speaker 1: norm because a father does not having a good father.
Speaker 1: Because I really want to make sure I don't send
Speaker 1: this message. It does not stop you from having heart aches.
Speaker 1: It doesn't stop you from dinner. My father was the
Speaker 1: kind of man that he stayed out of heat. I
Speaker 1: guess I could say he trusted me. He knew that
Speaker 1: he put everything in me and it was up to
Speaker 1: me to utilize everything that he gave me, make the
Speaker 1: decisions to right decisions off of it. He talked to
Speaker 1: me about every type of man that I could possibly
Speaker 1: deal with an encounter and how to handle it, how
Speaker 1: not to be influenced by certain things. So I had
Speaker 1: my ownline, you know. And yes I did I dealt
Speaker 1: with uh, you know guys that gang bang? Yes I did. Oh,
Speaker 1: so you did deal with that? Now was it? Did
Speaker 1: you ever hear your pops voice and to back your mom? Like,
Speaker 1: I know, I shouldn't be here with this no good nigga.
Speaker 1: My daddy wouldn't be having I heard his voice in
Speaker 1: my head telling me, you know what he would think.
Speaker 1: Make sure you, you know, keep your head on the swivel.
Speaker 1: I always know what's going on around you. That's what
Speaker 1: he always saw me, and that's what I did. He
Speaker 1: knew he couldn't control, and you know, and that's very important.
Speaker 1: You cannot when you just think, you know, when you
Speaker 1: tell when you when somebody is in love with someone
Speaker 1: and you constantly badging them about him, Normally, it's gonna
Speaker 1: push him closer to him. It's not gonna they're not
Speaker 1: it's not gonna put him my way. It's gonna push
Speaker 1: them closer. So what he did the way he you know,
Speaker 1: dealt with me and as a woman, he talked to
Speaker 1: me about what I may encounter. He talked to me
Speaker 1: about why certain why men do certain things. And it
Speaker 1: was up to me to utilize all the wisdom and
Speaker 1: and and and talks that we had, you know, all
Speaker 1: the wisdom and a game from him. And when I
Speaker 1: dealt with certain guys, you know, he might not have
Speaker 1: been I never did go to him and tell him all, Dad,
Speaker 1: this dude is like a real game banger. I wasn't
Speaker 1: gonna do that. But at the same time, I knew
Speaker 1: what I was gonna get myself into and what I wasn't,
Speaker 1: you know, I knew how far I was gonna go.
Speaker 1: And not think that women is naturally attracted the boys
Speaker 1: that got an element of mystery about them, and some don't.
Speaker 1: I just don't think women like punks. I don't think
Speaker 1: they necessarily got to be a game banger. I just
Speaker 1: don't think women like man and she know that it's
Speaker 1: gonna fight for it, just didn't get his ass whoop
Speaker 1: in front of exactly ya. Men like myself, I can
Speaker 1: say I want to protect her because you know what, honestly,
Speaker 1: I think women just want of motherfucker that's gonna fight
Speaker 1: back just right, not just gonna fight. Yeah, that's what
Speaker 1: I'm saying. Yeah, And it's all about how a man
Speaker 1: carry his shelf with her. You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1: Everything you don't have to take off on Everything is
Speaker 1: not about a fight. It's just how you how you
Speaker 1: you show your maturity to shotain motherfucker's in some bullshit. Well,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna tell you when when it comes to women,
Speaker 1: and my wife broke this down to me one time.
Speaker 1: It's certain situations that a real woman is not gonna
Speaker 1: tell you about because they may not want you to
Speaker 1: get no bullshit over something it's nothing like it may
Speaker 1: be something I may be in the store right and
Speaker 1: my wife may not tell me something to each in
Speaker 1: the car and I'm around the corner like she had
Speaker 1: tell me that dude was doing that. Why you didn't
Speaker 1: tell me? You'll to them up, and that's why I
Speaker 1: didn't tell you ask me, because you'd have been getting
Speaker 1: drug out of the handcuff right now, you know. And
Speaker 1: then there's certain things that where something happened she feels
Speaker 1: I need to know about it. She bring it to
Speaker 1: my attention. But that's what she told me because I
Speaker 1: should always look at the way because she schooled my
Speaker 1: boys on certain stuff, like any girl that runs to
Speaker 1: tell you everything about getting you jelous all the time
Speaker 1: because and fighting over like like get away from So
Speaker 1: I think, you know, something like this is needed because
Speaker 1: it's a lot of brothers, like James said, they want
Speaker 1: to be involved with their kids life, you know, daughters
Speaker 1: or sons, be whatever, but they can't. They can't. And
Speaker 1: then some of them just don't know how, you know,
Speaker 1: because if you didn't have that, then how could you
Speaker 1: give it, you know, So some of them don't know how.
Speaker 1: So part of the book is also about that, which
Speaker 1: is why you know, I give examples. I'm not thinking,
Speaker 1: you know, you don't necessarily have to use the ones
Speaker 1: that I give. You can make you know your own
Speaker 1: because everybody has a gift. Everybody has something. Every man
Speaker 1: has something that he could teach a daughter. Yes, that's real.
Speaker 1: And where can people get this book from the book
Speaker 1: is available on Amazon right now, hopefully in Barnes and
Speaker 1: Noble soon. I'm waiting to hear back from them, but
Speaker 1: right now you can go on Amazon dot com and
Speaker 1: purchase the book. Teach Them their Word by April l Ritchie,
Speaker 1: by April Richie. I'm gonna read this. Um, I'm gonna
Speaker 1: read this dedication real quick. You see, this book is
Speaker 1: dedicated to my phenomenal father, my hero, the first man
Speaker 1: I ever loved, Preston Thelijah Richie Jr. My heart. No,
Speaker 1: daddy meant a lot to you, didn't. Yes, he did
Speaker 1: means a lot to me. And wherever he loved me
Speaker 1: a grab bag And that's that's very important. You know.
Speaker 1: He loved me a grab bag full of all kind
Speaker 1: of you know, lifelines that I can pull out of,
Speaker 1: you know, whenever I'm dealing with this, if I'm dealing
Speaker 1: with something with a man, if I'm dealing with something
Speaker 1: at the job, all kind of He he taught me
Speaker 1: so much that there's nothing that I don't think I
Speaker 1: can handle. Like in my book, I'll talk about when
Speaker 1: he passed away, you know, and one of my close
Speaker 1: friends asked me, out of everything that he taught you,
Speaker 1: he didn't teach you about this, and you know, something
Speaker 1: like I couldn't believe that she said that to me,
Speaker 1: you know, but at the same time, it stopped me
Speaker 1: in my tracks because I was like, yeah, multiple times,
Speaker 1: so these are the things that you have to prepare
Speaker 1: your your your children for a period. And he did that.
Speaker 1: He did that in a phenomenal way. So you know,
Speaker 1: I was lucky. Uh, you don't always have. Everybody don't
Speaker 1: have the same experience. That's why it's important to share.
Speaker 1: And that's me. I'm gonna share of minds if I
Speaker 1: meet a woman that that needs that I noticed is
Speaker 1: you know, doing certain things to get attention, because women
Speaker 1: can be promiscuous, they can dress you know, rounchy, uh
Speaker 1: be with you like well, promiscus, being with too many men,
Speaker 1: being boristerous or whatever you know, or are doing moving
Speaker 1: too fast And it's not my place, but I'm gonna
Speaker 1: find some kind of way when I have when I'm
Speaker 1: around somebody like that or you know, and I'm talking
Speaker 1: to him and they're telling me about the relationship that
Speaker 1: they're in. If it's something that that if Red flag
Speaker 1: goes up, I'm gonna find some kind of way to
Speaker 1: put a coatil, you know, if I can. And I
Speaker 1: think that, um, we as women should should do that
Speaker 1: for each other. Yeah, it's only right. It's only right
Speaker 1: that we that we treat each other as you know,
Speaker 1: because I give brothers sometimes, especially if they solicit my advice,
Speaker 1: because you know, with some brothers, you gotta be real
Speaker 1: careful with that because the motherfucker feel like you're trying
Speaker 1: to one up sometimes really you're just trying to just
Speaker 1: give him some help. So the brother asked me, I'm
Speaker 1: a damn should tell him the truth because I ain't
Speaker 1: got number of love for you guys. Want to see
Speaker 1: you just achieve the greatness that you capable of achieving.
Speaker 1: I ain't gonna never try to tell you down nothing
Speaker 1: you know and tell you nothing. So I got that's
Speaker 1: that's that's cool. But I got you got a lot
Speaker 1: of brothers out there that that's scared to be fathers.
Speaker 1: You got some brothers out there that I don't know
Speaker 1: how to love, like you know, I don't know how
Speaker 1: to love. I didn't know how to love. But you know,
Speaker 1: let's stop using certain things in our life as an excuse.
Speaker 1: You know what I'm saying. I learned how to read
Speaker 1: so I can learn how to love, you know what
Speaker 1: I'm saying. So I'm pretty much talking to myself, you
Speaker 1: know what I'm saying. After my conversation with Mins, before
Speaker 1: she passed the respect I had for women, I went
Speaker 1: that just that high, you know what I'm saying, and
Speaker 1: elevated like a mug. And you know, being a father,
Speaker 1: I took pride in being uh pops. I was one
Speaker 1: that didn't want to have thirty kids. My three was enough.
Speaker 1: How many grand babies they give me? I'm cool, I
Speaker 1: don't I didn't need all that. But there's a lot
Speaker 1: of brothers I think don't have this story came tell
Speaker 1: his story. So my my thing is, man, don't let
Speaker 1: nobody tell you you can't be a father. You will
Speaker 1: find a way out to be a father. If you don't,
Speaker 1: then you're using that ship as a cop out to
Speaker 1: not be a father. Show step your game up. You
Speaker 1: want to be in your kid's life, Yeah for sure,
Speaker 1: Because I'm gonna tell you being the father is probably
Speaker 1: the most gangster thing that you can never do in life.
Speaker 1: Because I'm gonna tell you the worrying will never stop,
Speaker 1: especially when you get your daughter. Because my daughter walks
Speaker 1: on from school sometimes it's nastly. We're around that time.
Speaker 1: I'm almost on the phone with her, from the time
Speaker 1: that she leaves that school the time she hit out
Speaker 1: door and out here in the house, I'm on the
Speaker 1: phone with her because I never stopped worrying, because it's
Speaker 1: just crazy. Motherfucker's out there and you just hear too
Speaker 1: much bad You never stopped worrying. Now where you had
Speaker 1: on social media? On social media, I'm more on Instagram,
Speaker 1: or you can go to the real April Richie on
Speaker 1: Instagram and I'll saw on Facebook, the real April Richie. Yeah,
Speaker 1: we go for sure, get this up. Can we appreciate
Speaker 1: you coming on? I'm happy to I'm like, I'm honored,
Speaker 1: honored to be here there. When I reached ow to James,
Speaker 1: that was just greatly appreciated. Because what I can't think
Speaker 1: of a better Uh, I can't think of a better
Speaker 1: stands to use in this one. This is the Gangster Chronicles.
Speaker 1: It should be a lot of men, I mean how
Speaker 1: many I mean listeners you guys got now, what is
Speaker 1: it a million? Now? So exactly so you know, you
Speaker 1: got a lot of men. I'm sure I listened to
Speaker 1: Granster chronicles, so I'm sure it's a lot of women
Speaker 1: listening to. But uh, for the men out there, you know, uh,
Speaker 1: because that's it. Fathers are usually the fathers that are
Speaker 1: usually effected, I hate to say it, are the and
Speaker 1: the minorities, you know, us are the black fathers, the
Speaker 1: brown fathers. You know, they deal with a lot. Now,
Speaker 1: I don't know, I'm not trying to stereotype anybody or whatever,
Speaker 1: but how many of it, how many black men are
Speaker 1: in prison. There's a lot of our black men, so
Speaker 1: exactly of the father So that's one reason why, like
Speaker 1: I said, I mentioned in the book that you know,
Speaker 1: even incarcerated father can be a father. How many are
Speaker 1: actually taking care of the household? Yeah, exactly, so now
Speaker 1: they don't, and that's what you know, that's what's important. Also,
Speaker 1: it's important that uh we continue to even the men,
Speaker 1: you know, to respect the men. That's another something that's
Speaker 1: going on. Not trying to get off the topic, but
Speaker 1: we got women that don't respect men. That's something that
Speaker 1: fathers teach you. My father taught me so much that
Speaker 1: I can't stand to see a man being belittle by
Speaker 1: a woman. I can't. It's it's one of my I
Speaker 1: cannot stand to see a woman be little a man
Speaker 1: in public. It's terrible. So because of the respect that
Speaker 1: I have for manhood, and that is because of my
Speaker 1: father that I have that respect for me and I
Speaker 1: know what a real man looks like. Yeah, he's something
Speaker 1: you need to know, what you need to know. It's worth.
Speaker 1: But we appreciate it. We appreciate the wisdom. You'll make
Speaker 1: sure y'all go out and get this book. I would
Speaker 1: appreciate to teach them there were Amazon Prime, Amazon dot com,
Speaker 1: the real April Richie at gmail dot com. Reach out
Speaker 1: to me, let me know your thoughts and uh, thank
Speaker 1: you for having me, and we will have this the
Speaker 1: links to her book and the description. So make sure
Speaker 1: you're going a title description and look for the link.
Speaker 1: We gotta there. Go support this sister, all right, and
Speaker 1: everybody out there talking about they don't have no way
Speaker 1: and don't understand or have no route to take to
Speaker 1: be a father, Go get the book. If you share
Speaker 1: is about being a father, Go get this book. Man.
Speaker 1: I'm reading it through the cover and it's just damn
Speaker 1: not all right, and we can see y'all next week.
Speaker 1: We are here. Okay, thank you well. That concludes another
Speaker 1: episode of Against the Chronicles podcast. Be sure to download
Speaker 1: the i Heart app and subscrip right to The Gangster
Speaker 1: Chronicles podcast For Apple users, find a purple micro on
Speaker 1: the front of your screen, subscribe to the show, leave
Speaker 1: a comment and rating. Executive producers for The Gangster Chronicles
Speaker 1: podcast and Norman Steve James McDonald, Aran m c a. Tyler,
Speaker 1: our visual media directors Brian White, and our audio editors
Speaker 1: Taylor Hayes. The Gangster Chronicles is a production of I
Speaker 1: Heart Media Network and The Black Effect Podcast Network. For
Speaker 1: more podcast from my Heart Radio, visit the our Heart
Speaker 1: Radio app Apple podcast wherever you're listen to your podcasts.