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Speaker 1: While they were within the community, they were having drunk

2
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Speaker 1: sex parties.

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Speaker 2: Oh man, why'd you leave.

4
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Speaker 1: Because the people having the drunk sex parties left?

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Speaker 2: Oh man? Well, did did you gonna invite it after

6
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Speaker 2: the fact, Like, once you finally left, did they invite you?

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Speaker 1: Not exactly, They're not really doing that anymore. I did

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Speaker 1: get a lap dance from a witch once with one

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Speaker 1: of those friends, So that was that was sort of

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Speaker 1: a moment where I was like, Hey, this is probably

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Speaker 1: as far as from I ever thought I would be.

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Speaker 2: What do you mean a lap dance from a witch?

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Speaker 2: What did that entail? Dylan?

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Speaker 3: Yes?

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Speaker 2: How are you? Dylan?

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Speaker 1: I'm good?

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Speaker 4: How are you?

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Speaker 2: I am a gecko on the computer. I wonder how

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Speaker 2: many more times I can say that before it gets old.

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Speaker 2: What's going on with you? Dylan?

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Speaker 1: Do you want to start broadly or right now?

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Speaker 2: Hmm, that's a really good question. Do I want to

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Speaker 2: start broadly or right now? I kind of want to

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Speaker 2: start with you know what, Let's start broadly? Okay, Well,

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Speaker 2: I mean listen, it says here that you left the

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Speaker 2: Jehovah's Witnesses a couple of years ago, and you want

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Speaker 2: to talk about that? Yes, yes, broadly, you know what,

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Speaker 2: let's get into it. Tell me, tell me about the JW.

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Speaker 1: All right, Well, I know you've had some people on

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Speaker 1: here or had experience with it. I mean, my experience

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Speaker 1: was very explosive with how I left. I mean, I

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Speaker 1: don't want to get too close, too far into how

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Speaker 1: it really started with like everything, I was in it

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Speaker 1: for twenty two years, my whole life.

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Speaker 2: Twenty two years. Well you're you're twenty four, all right,

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Speaker 2: So you were in it from the time you were

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Speaker 2: a little You were a little baby knocking door to door,

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Speaker 2: spreading the good word.

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Speaker 1: With a tiny, tiny briefcase in a diaper. Yep.

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Speaker 2: Kind of adorable.

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Speaker 1: But many doors were slammed in that baby's face. So

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Speaker 1: I handled rejection really well.

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Speaker 2: Must feel good to slam a door in a baby's

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Speaker 2: face anyway. Anyway, all right, so you start off your

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Speaker 2: little baby Jehovah's witness boy, and you know, tell me

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Speaker 2: about what that was like growing up in that in

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Speaker 2: that community.

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Speaker 1: It was, I mean, it had its ups and downs.

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Speaker 1: I mean I can't, I really truly can't say that

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Speaker 1: it was all bad. I mean, I have my family

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Speaker 1: with me, and I love my family, and I loved

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Speaker 1: a lot of the friends that I had made, whether

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Speaker 1: it was just because they were there or I actually

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Speaker 1: pursued a friendship with them, because there's a lot of

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Speaker 1: forced friendship in that culture, of course, But you know,

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Speaker 1: I never ever truly felt one hundred percent on it.

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Speaker 1: I wanted to one hundred percent on it so badly

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Speaker 1: because I could everyone else in my family was such

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Speaker 1: a golden star in it, you know, like my yeah

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Speaker 1: both into it, Like my mom has made missionary trips

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Speaker 1: to Africa, like they they're crazy, like.

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Speaker 2: Right, So you're in this community and everybody around you believes,

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Speaker 2: and so you really want to believe truly.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, Like I wanted to wake up every day and

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Speaker 1: just be like I have this connection with God, you know,

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Speaker 1: and he's he's really he's really guiding me. But I

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Speaker 1: never felt like that.

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Speaker 5: It was.

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Speaker 1: And what I did, whether that was you know, actually

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Speaker 1: putting effort into it or being a complete blob and

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Speaker 1: not giving a shit about like getting farther in it,

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Speaker 1: you know.

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Speaker 2: And you said just now, you said something that I

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Speaker 2: thought was kind of interesting where you were like a

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Speaker 2: lot of these friendships are forced, but you alluded a

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Speaker 2: little bit to having if I'm interpreting this correctly. You

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Speaker 2: alluded a little bit to having at least a few

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Speaker 2: friendships that you pursued intentionally. Is that Is that true?

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Speaker 2: Do you feel like you made some genuine friends in

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Speaker 2: this community?

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Speaker 3: Oh?

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Speaker 1: Yeah, absolutely, And interestingly enough, a couple of these true

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Speaker 1: friends are now also exited and I I'm still I'm

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Speaker 1: going to an LS Dream concert on Friday with a

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Speaker 1: couple of them, so that will be fun.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, And it makes sense to the people that you would,

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Speaker 2: you know, sort of hook up with. There are also

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Speaker 2: people who are like, hey, what's fuck's going on with

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Speaker 2: all this stuff?

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Speaker 3: Oh?

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Speaker 1: Yeah, no, totally. And they left before me, but they

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Speaker 1: could not believe that I left when I did, because

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Speaker 1: everyone viewed me as a golden child as well, even

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Speaker 1: though internally I never.

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Speaker 6: Felt that way.

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Speaker 2: How did you feel being viewed as a as a

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Speaker 2: golden child? Was that like a pressure on you?

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Speaker 1: It's funny you should say that, because I didn't realize

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Speaker 1: they viewed me as a golden child until after I

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Speaker 1: had left, and they told me they weren't inviting me

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Speaker 1: to the like drunk sex parties they were having.

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Speaker 2: Who was an inbody?

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Speaker 4: Oh?

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Speaker 2: With the the people within the community. The people who

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Speaker 2: left the community were having the drunk sex parties.

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Speaker 1: While they were within the community, they were having drunk

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Speaker 1: sex parties.

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Speaker 2: Oh man, why'd you leave.

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Speaker 1: Because the people having the drunk sex parties left?

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Speaker 4: Oh?

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Speaker 2: Oh oh, okay, all right, So so here's okay. So

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Speaker 2: here's what I'm what I'm hearing here is like there's

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Speaker 2: a little gang there's a little gang of this, a

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Speaker 2: little gang of the factors in here. There's little gang

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Speaker 2: of people who are like, hey, what's going on? And

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Speaker 2: they but they and you secretly are are a de factor.

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Speaker 2: But the factors they look at you as as as

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Speaker 2: a golden boy because you're trying to believe so like

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Speaker 2: outwardly it would it makes sense that you're giving off

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Speaker 2: this golden boy air to you. Is that is that accurate?

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Speaker 1: Sort of? Sort of? I mean, I wasn't. I wasn't

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Speaker 1: a defector until the day I decided I wanted to leave.

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Speaker 1: I believed up until a certain moment, there was always

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Speaker 1: a part of me that believed in it and was

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Speaker 1: scared of it. But I also had a rebellious streak

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Speaker 1: inside me that wanted to like get out there and

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Speaker 1: do shit that I wasn't supposed to. But these people

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Speaker 1: didn't give a shit earlier than I did, and I

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Speaker 1: was much better at avoiding those situations, so which is

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Speaker 1: why they never invited me to they're drunk sex parties.

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Speaker 2: Man, Well, did did you invite it? After the fact, like,

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Speaker 2: once you finally left, did they invite you?

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Speaker 1: Not exactly. They're not really doing that more because there

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Speaker 1: are adults that are trying to be slightly more.

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Speaker 5: Good.

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Speaker 1: I did get a lap dance from a witch once

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Speaker 1: with one of those friends, so that was That was

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Speaker 1: sort of a moment where I was like, Hey, this

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Speaker 1: is probably as far as from I ever thought I

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Speaker 1: would be.

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Speaker 2: What do you mean a lap dance from a witch? What?

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Speaker 2: What did that entail? U?

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Speaker 1: We had gone to a concert and one of my

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Speaker 1: friends met this or had reconnected with this crazy wicked

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Speaker 1: girl and we ended up at a tenthouse suite in

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Speaker 1: Boston and she was giving lap dances to everyone. Well,

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Speaker 1: we were all fucking blasted, and I just was like,

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Speaker 1: had this go away from Jesus moment? I guess it's

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Speaker 1: the complete opposite of come to Jesus. But she, my god,

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Speaker 1: I'm getting a lap dance from a witch. Right now.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, and.

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Speaker 1: I was trying to get people to open the Good Book.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. You know, it's interesting that you defected, defected, de facted,

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Speaker 2: whatever the word is, because I actually was approached on

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Speaker 2: the street by a sort I don't think there were Mormons,

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Speaker 2: there were Christians, but they were religious people, and when

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Speaker 2: I was talking to them, it was very they were very,

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Speaker 2: very convinced. No part of my brain felt like these

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Speaker 2: people would ever budge on what it is that they

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Speaker 2: were spreading the Good Word of So it feels like

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Speaker 2: whatever's going on in these communities, I mean they're tight,

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Speaker 2: you know, the people who who really truly believe, I mean,

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Speaker 2: they fuck be leave.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, it's one a cult and a lot of people

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Speaker 1: don't know that it's starting to get out there. But

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Speaker 1: it's super controlling, like scarily. So obviously didn't really realize

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Speaker 1: that until doing external research after I had decided to leave.

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Speaker 1: But like I I could never go back now, obviously,

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Speaker 1: Like it's it's I've taken the red pill, you know,

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Speaker 1: or whatever, it's whichever fucking pill he took. I took

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Speaker 1: one of.

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Speaker 2: Those, so tell me, tell me, all right, So this

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Speaker 2: was only two years ago. It's fairly recent So as

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Speaker 2: a twenty two year old young man who has been

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Speaker 2: living in this, uh, it sounds to me a restrictive

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Speaker 2: community for a while. You deflect to fact whatever, whatever

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Speaker 2: the word of the day is, that we've been using.

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Speaker 2: That I've been using a shit ton all right?

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Speaker 3: Yeah?

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Speaker 2: And and what do what are some of the first

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Speaker 2: things you do as a as a free man you

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Speaker 2: know that you haven't been able to do for the

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Speaker 2: twenty two first years. What were some of the first

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Speaker 2: ventures into I guess hedonism that you embarked upon.

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Speaker 1: Well, I'm I think literally the day after I'd decided

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Speaker 1: to leave, I installed Tinder, which makes sense for a

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Speaker 1: young man at that page still have it, So it's

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Speaker 1: not it's not something I've grown out of. But I

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Speaker 1: immediately met a girl and dated her for six months,

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Speaker 1: and I was a virgin until I hadn't even kissed

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Speaker 1: the girl. I was twenty almost almost twenty two, I

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Speaker 1: think it was just about to turn twenty two at

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Speaker 1: the time, and never even kissed the girl. So that

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Speaker 1: was interesting and crazy trying to figure out maybe if

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Speaker 1: I was bisexual or gay or anything. I'm realized I'm straight,

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Speaker 1: So I'm boring as fuck. But you know, that was

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Speaker 1: an period I tried out because I'm super not Christian

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Speaker 1: anymore at all, and I don't have any of those leanings,

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Speaker 1: but not that I have anything against it, as long

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Speaker 1: as people aren't oppressing other people. But what else? I mean, drugs,

201
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Speaker 1: but not really anything that crazy, just like weed, which

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Speaker 1: I don't like. So I'm like, like, what couldn't that

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Speaker 1: have worked out for me? Of all Thames?

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Speaker 2: So I feel like there's got to be I mean,

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Speaker 2: after twenty two years of all that stuff, I feel

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Speaker 2: like there's gotta be a significant like adjustments going on.

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Speaker 2: It's going to be there's got to be a little

208
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Speaker 2: bit of a period of going like, well, I like

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Speaker 2: getting out of jail, like, well, what the fuck do

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Speaker 2: I do now?

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Speaker 1: Oh? It's fucking nuts? Like, Well, the way it happened

212
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Speaker 1: was I was super before I decided I wanted to leave.

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Speaker 1: I was super depressed. A couple of times. I was

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Speaker 1: borderline suicidal and I had never been suicidal in my

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Speaker 1: life and I didn't ever try anything, but it was

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Speaker 1: just getting to a point where it's completely unsustainable. And

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Speaker 1: so what happened is I was sitting at the meeting

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Speaker 1: they call on Kingdom Halls, but it's really just a church.

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Speaker 1: So sitting at the meeting and I am out of

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Speaker 1: my mind. I can't focus. I felt horrible, and all

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Speaker 1: of a sudden it just popped into my mind. Why

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Speaker 1: don't I look up some stuff or material that people

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Speaker 1: have who have left have written, So during this fucking

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Speaker 1: meeting preaching to me, I'm sitting there. It's actually what

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Speaker 1: we call the circuit over to your visit. So like

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Speaker 1: this grand puba character is here visiting, trying to like

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Speaker 1: build us all up with his grandeur. And I'm looking

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Speaker 1: up this shit and took three paragraphs of that online

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Speaker 1: article or essay to completely dissolve what was left of

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Speaker 1: my face. And I looked up. I'm not fucking crazy.

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Speaker 2: I don't.

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Speaker 1: It's not that I am not fitting into a place

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Speaker 1: where I should be fitting in. It's that I don't

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Speaker 1: have to fit in at all. And I should not

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Speaker 1: be oppressing and suppressing my character for the sake of

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Speaker 1: even people that I love, because it's just not sustainable.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, So to that point, for you say, for the

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Speaker 2: people that you love, tell me, how did uh talking

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Speaker 2: about the process of like reconciling this with your family.

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Speaker 1: That That was crazy because that happened like the day,

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Speaker 1: A day or two after. I was obviously having a

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Speaker 1: lot of inner turmoil and thoughts about it. My mind

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Speaker 1: was racing, and you know, reading all this material after

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Speaker 1: the fact, after the waking up process had really gone underway.

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Speaker 1: I was at work one day cleaning windows, which is

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Speaker 1: a super fucking common profession for witnesses. If anyone else

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Speaker 1: in the chat used to be in there, it's always

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Speaker 1: a joke that witnesses clean windows because it's easy to get.

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Speaker 1: But I decided, I'm like, I need to call my

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Speaker 1: family right now and tell them because this is on

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Speaker 1: my mind. So like, one by one, I just started

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Speaker 1: calling people while I was doing my job on my

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Speaker 1: Bluetooth headset, and just one by one, each of them

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Speaker 1: just completely dumbfounded and aghast and you know, crying and

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Speaker 1: begging me to change my mind or and you know,

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Speaker 1: somewhat gaslighting me, like we won't be able to talk

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Speaker 1: to you anymore, and I'm like, I just can't. I can't.

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Speaker 1: So my sisters and my mom and pretty much a

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Speaker 1: couple other people, that was the last time I've spoken

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Speaker 1: to them, really I have.

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Speaker 2: So in the past year, you haven't spoken to your sister,

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Speaker 2: your mom at all.

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Speaker 1: My sisters have and my mom have not spoken to

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Speaker 1: me or reached out at all. My dad my dad

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Speaker 1: a couple of times, but that's gotten worse because with

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Speaker 1: the whole Ukraine and Russia thing going on, they they

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Speaker 1: think that it's the end times. So I think that

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Speaker 1: they're really doubling down on their own indoctrination for the

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Speaker 1: sake of their own mental health. And it was crazy

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Speaker 1: because when I moved out, I lived three minutes from

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Speaker 1: my sister, and I remember one day I went up

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Speaker 1: to her house with her recently married husband, who opened

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Speaker 1: the door, and because I just was like, I just

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Speaker 1: want to go see I want to see what happens

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Speaker 1: if I go to see her.

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Speaker 2: You just went to her house like on a whim.

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Speaker 1: On a whim, on a whim after work one day

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Speaker 1: since I had left, and I went up to the door.

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Speaker 1: Her husband opened the door and he didn't invite me in. Uh,

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Speaker 1: like I was with them on their first date. Like

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Speaker 1: this is like not somebody I don't know, Like this

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Speaker 1: is my my sister's husband who I was all courting period.

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Speaker 1: He and I was. He was so awkward and I

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Speaker 1: asked for a glass of water because I kind of

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Speaker 1: wanted to test it and see if I could get inside. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: And he brought it out and I was like, Okay,

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Speaker 1: this is how it's going to be. And so I

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Speaker 1: was like, he is, is Maddie not going to come

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Speaker 1: in or come out? He's like no, I don't think so,

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Speaker 1: and I'm like okay. So I turned around and I

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Speaker 1: got back in my car. And that's the last attempt

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Speaker 1: to at like physical contact with with family it is.

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Speaker 1: I mean that was during the height of COVID too.

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Speaker 2: So anyway, so, man, how do you how do you

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Speaker 2: feel about all of this? Does it is that? Is

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Speaker 2: that painful for you? I'd have to imagine.

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Speaker 1: It ebbs and flows. Like sometimes I feel like I'm

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Speaker 1: a robot because I will think about my family and

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Speaker 1: have almost no feeling at all, and that kind of

300
00:19:11,280 --> 00:19:18,639
Speaker 1: because I'm not a sociopath or but I don't feel

301
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Speaker 1: like I have the proper feelings to process it. Like

302
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Speaker 1: I barely cry about it. I sobbed once at a

303
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Speaker 1: friend's house. Well, I was high on weed and a

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Speaker 1: little bit drunk, and something just set me off and

305
00:19:36,600 --> 00:19:39,840
Speaker 1: that felt good, and I wanted I wish I could

306
00:19:39,880 --> 00:19:40,919
Speaker 1: do that more.

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Speaker 2: You have a desire to be more in touch with

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Speaker 2: your emotions about everything.

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Speaker 1: Oh I wish I could just sob for hours about

310
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Speaker 1: the trauma I've faced. But you know, like there's just

311
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Speaker 1: like a block. Other times I'm angry, just pissed at

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00:20:02,640 --> 00:20:06,280
Speaker 1: them that they I don't care that they believe in

313
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Speaker 1: the religion. I don't care that they have a different

314
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Speaker 1: belief system than me. I just want them to recognize

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Speaker 1: that I'm the same person and I'm not some hideous

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Speaker 1: gargoyle of sin.

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Speaker 6: You know.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I'd be fucking pissed. If I were you, I'd

319
00:20:25,240 --> 00:20:27,239
Speaker 2: be like, what the fuck? I'm your brother, I'm your son,

320
00:20:27,320 --> 00:20:31,439
Speaker 2: who gives a fuck about all the stupid you know,

321
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Speaker 2: god stuff. It's like, can't you see what's really important here?

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Speaker 5: Oh?

323
00:20:37,400 --> 00:20:42,280
Speaker 1: Totally, Well, especially since my dad lost his dad at

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Speaker 1: he he died at sixty two, just having like he

325
00:20:46,000 --> 00:20:47,800
Speaker 1: was walking down the street and had a heart attack.

326
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Speaker 1: And I'm like, if you would, you would he would

327
00:20:53,880 --> 00:20:57,639
Speaker 1: give anything to see you again, or vice versa. And

328
00:20:57,760 --> 00:21:02,240
Speaker 1: yet I am your son that you held in your arms,

329
00:21:02,400 --> 00:21:07,399
Speaker 1: and you could have me right now, you know, And

330
00:21:09,080 --> 00:21:11,800
Speaker 1: that's just baffling to me, like I can't imagine doing

331
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Speaker 1: that to my future children, Like and I want to

332
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Speaker 1: have children, And I'm like, how I can't mentally parse

333
00:21:22,920 --> 00:21:25,199
Speaker 1: what could carry you away from a child, especially if

334
00:21:25,240 --> 00:21:27,919
Speaker 1: they're not like a fucking murderer or a or a

335
00:21:28,040 --> 00:21:30,640
Speaker 1: rapist or I don't know something.

336
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Speaker 2: You just.

337
00:21:33,000 --> 00:21:36,080
Speaker 1: Even murderer's parents still love them, like you hear about

338
00:21:36,080 --> 00:21:38,480
Speaker 1: it all the time. Yeah, it's like what that.

339
00:21:41,920 --> 00:21:46,720
Speaker 2: M tell me about? Well, I mean, I mean, so Dylan, like,

340
00:21:46,800 --> 00:21:52,480
Speaker 2: what's your life like now? Like, uh, all right, But

341
00:21:52,600 --> 00:21:55,639
Speaker 2: so at the very beginning of this call, we were like, okay,

342
00:21:55,720 --> 00:21:59,040
Speaker 2: broad and then right now, I feel like we covered

343
00:21:59,040 --> 00:22:03,080
Speaker 2: the broad before we go, let's cover the now. Where

344
00:22:03,119 --> 00:22:05,320
Speaker 2: are we? Do we have? Friends? Do we have? I

345
00:22:05,359 --> 00:22:08,040
Speaker 2: know you, I know you that things have been pretty

346
00:22:08,200 --> 00:22:12,240
Speaker 2: fucking tough with the family, But uh, it sounds like yeah,

347
00:22:12,320 --> 00:22:15,959
Speaker 2: cool friends. You know, it sounds like I'm getting I'm

348
00:22:15,960 --> 00:22:18,879
Speaker 2: getting bits and pieces here of like you know, you

349
00:22:19,000 --> 00:22:21,639
Speaker 2: have a support system of some kind. You're not just

350
00:22:21,720 --> 00:22:25,240
Speaker 2: like hanging out in the wind. You know what's going on?

351
00:22:25,280 --> 00:22:25,560
Speaker 3: Now?

352
00:22:26,800 --> 00:22:31,159
Speaker 1: Oh, it's it's true. I mean I really value the friends.

353
00:22:31,160 --> 00:22:36,240
Speaker 1: I think I need to work on valuing the friends

354
00:22:36,240 --> 00:22:42,280
Speaker 1: I have rather than the amount of friends I want.

355
00:22:42,880 --> 00:22:46,479
Speaker 1: And it's unfortunate because I don't always want to just

356
00:22:46,600 --> 00:22:49,359
Speaker 1: connect with other ex witnesses. I want to connect with

357
00:22:49,440 --> 00:22:52,720
Speaker 1: people who aren't because I'm I don't even want to

358
00:22:52,760 --> 00:22:55,000
Speaker 1: consider myself an ex witness. I don't want to be

359
00:22:55,040 --> 00:22:57,280
Speaker 1: Dylan the person who less the religion. I want to

360
00:22:57,280 --> 00:23:03,680
Speaker 1: be Dylan yep, Just Dylan yep. But I really do

361
00:23:03,920 --> 00:23:08,520
Speaker 1: have good friends, and I mean I have a job

362
00:23:08,640 --> 00:23:14,000
Speaker 1: where like people appreciate me, and I just got promoted

363
00:23:14,920 --> 00:23:18,160
Speaker 1: in certified in my job. I'm a chimney sweep now,

364
00:23:20,119 --> 00:23:25,159
Speaker 1: so that's really cool and that's been going great, and

365
00:23:25,200 --> 00:23:30,960
Speaker 1: I can support myself really well, and it's all at

366
00:23:31,000 --> 00:23:36,120
Speaker 1: the expense of leaving, Like I pulled myself up by

367
00:23:36,160 --> 00:23:41,159
Speaker 1: my bootstraps and have my own apartment and pay my

368
00:23:41,800 --> 00:23:45,000
Speaker 1: time and have a good job and can afford to

369
00:23:45,000 --> 00:23:47,840
Speaker 1: go out and have fun sometimes. And it's like, I

370
00:23:47,960 --> 00:23:50,280
Speaker 1: really need to look at that more often and be like,

371
00:23:50,400 --> 00:23:54,040
Speaker 1: you are really fucking fortunate.

372
00:23:54,280 --> 00:24:02,720
Speaker 2: That you Yeah, what are we gonna say? I feel

373
00:24:02,760 --> 00:24:05,080
Speaker 2: like I cut you off. But as you're going to

374
00:24:05,119 --> 00:24:09,000
Speaker 2: go on a self a self motivational thing, I want

375
00:24:09,000 --> 00:24:09,639
Speaker 2: to let you finish that.

376
00:24:12,240 --> 00:24:16,320
Speaker 1: I can try a good attempt to rouse myself from

377
00:24:16,320 --> 00:24:21,679
Speaker 1: the ashes, but it's I think the biggest problem that

378
00:24:21,720 --> 00:24:26,000
Speaker 1: I'm facing right now is that I'm single, which means

379
00:24:26,040 --> 00:24:31,720
Speaker 1: I don't have very much intimacy. And that doesn't include

380
00:24:31,840 --> 00:24:35,480
Speaker 1: just sex. It's just I'm talking like heart to heart

381
00:24:35,560 --> 00:24:38,200
Speaker 1: with somebody that is dedicated to you or at least

382
00:24:38,240 --> 00:24:39,560
Speaker 1: is wanting to get to know you.

383
00:24:39,960 --> 00:24:40,960
Speaker 3: So that's tough.

384
00:24:42,640 --> 00:24:46,520
Speaker 1: Because pretty much the family that I make for myself

385
00:24:46,720 --> 00:24:49,720
Speaker 1: is going to be the family I have for the

386
00:24:49,760 --> 00:24:53,399
Speaker 1: foreseeable future. Like I don't think my I don't. I

387
00:24:53,440 --> 00:24:56,440
Speaker 1: can't assume my family will leave someday and then reconnect

388
00:24:56,480 --> 00:24:56,720
Speaker 1: with me.

389
00:24:58,680 --> 00:25:04,040
Speaker 2: So not having that, yeah, well, Dylan, I you know, look,

390
00:25:04,080 --> 00:25:06,479
Speaker 2: before we go, I want to say, you know, all

391
00:25:06,640 --> 00:25:11,080
Speaker 2: the all the sort of rousing yourself up that you

392
00:25:11,160 --> 00:25:15,119
Speaker 2: were doing, I think it's well earned. I mean, you claw,

393
00:25:15,320 --> 00:25:20,919
Speaker 2: I mean, it takes a lot of fucking balls to

394
00:25:20,960 --> 00:25:25,040
Speaker 2: be born into this life path that's set up for

395
00:25:25,119 --> 00:25:28,320
Speaker 2: you and set up for you pretty damn hard, and

396
00:25:28,400 --> 00:25:30,679
Speaker 2: having all I mean, these people who you you know

397
00:25:30,720 --> 00:25:35,399
Speaker 2: at a young age are like supposed to trust really hard.

398
00:25:36,000 --> 00:25:39,600
Speaker 2: Your mom, your dad, your sister. I mean, these the

399
00:25:40,480 --> 00:25:43,639
Speaker 2: closest people, the people that are supposed to be the

400
00:25:43,680 --> 00:25:47,240
Speaker 2: most worthy of your trust, lay out this path for you,

401
00:25:47,760 --> 00:25:53,160
Speaker 2: and then for you to just from within deflect from

402
00:25:53,240 --> 00:25:58,280
Speaker 2: that and decide for yourself what the right thing to

403
00:25:58,359 --> 00:26:04,080
Speaker 2: do is and then go and then like to have

404
00:26:04,160 --> 00:26:08,159
Speaker 2: those thoughts, to surmise those thoughts and those feelings, and

405
00:26:08,200 --> 00:26:11,199
Speaker 2: the desire to deflect is one thing, and then to

406
00:26:11,359 --> 00:26:16,879
Speaker 2: act on it against what everyone who you're supposed to

407
00:26:16,920 --> 00:26:20,440
Speaker 2: trust is telling you. I mean that that takes fucking guts,

408
00:26:20,840 --> 00:26:23,920
Speaker 2: and it takes a lot of guts. And the fact

409
00:26:23,920 --> 00:26:26,680
Speaker 2: that you were able to do that, and now you've

410
00:26:26,720 --> 00:26:30,639
Speaker 2: got this job, You've got friends, You've you've got a

411
00:26:30,680 --> 00:26:34,119
Speaker 2: fucking apartment that you're paying the rent on. You've you know,

412
00:26:34,400 --> 00:26:38,720
Speaker 2: I'm sure you'll have a girlfriend soon. You know. You've

413
00:26:39,000 --> 00:26:42,879
Speaker 2: you've built a life from your for yourself, not just

414
00:26:42,960 --> 00:26:45,280
Speaker 2: from I don't even want to say from scratch, Like

415
00:26:46,280 --> 00:26:49,240
Speaker 2: like you had worse circumstances than scratch. You had to

416
00:26:49,400 --> 00:26:51,960
Speaker 2: you were like in the negative. You had to get

417
00:26:52,000 --> 00:26:54,439
Speaker 2: out of that one life and then build a new

418
00:26:54,520 --> 00:26:57,080
Speaker 2: one from scratch. I mean, that's damn impressive, you know,

419
00:26:57,359 --> 00:27:01,199
Speaker 2: so you definitely definitely should be proud of yourself for

420
00:27:01,320 --> 00:27:04,920
Speaker 2: all of that, Dylan, and uh and Matt I, I

421
00:27:04,920 --> 00:27:08,119
Speaker 2: I wish you the best. I'm I'm inspired by by you,

422
00:27:08,240 --> 00:27:12,240
Speaker 2: by anyone who's brave enough to forge their own path,

423
00:27:13,240 --> 00:27:16,480
Speaker 2: you know, so, so props to you and and and

424
00:27:16,560 --> 00:27:19,159
Speaker 2: thank you very much for sharing all of that with

425
00:27:19,240 --> 00:27:22,160
Speaker 2: all of us. You've been on a on a crazy

426
00:27:22,280 --> 00:27:25,719
Speaker 2: journey and and I know you you mentioned that you

427
00:27:26,520 --> 00:27:31,520
Speaker 2: want to be able to process your emotions better. I hope,

428
00:27:31,560 --> 00:27:33,040
Speaker 2: I hope you're able to do that. That sounds like

429
00:27:33,040 --> 00:27:35,720
Speaker 2: some real therapy type of stuff that I hope you're

430
00:27:35,720 --> 00:27:39,280
Speaker 2: able to get a hold of. But damn you know

431
00:27:39,359 --> 00:27:42,600
Speaker 2: you're you're You're an impressive fucking guy, Dylan for real.

432
00:27:44,840 --> 00:27:48,320
Speaker 1: Well, that means a hell of a lot from a

433
00:27:48,320 --> 00:27:49,840
Speaker 1: anthropomorphic lizard.

434
00:27:50,440 --> 00:27:54,320
Speaker 3: I really appreciate it, of course, man, of course.

435
00:27:54,240 --> 00:27:57,200
Speaker 1: Definitely negative tonight. I appreciate it.

436
00:27:57,080 --> 00:27:59,840
Speaker 2: So much, of course. Man, thank you again for sharing.

437
00:28:01,480 --> 00:28:14,040
Speaker 2: Thanks Lyle, Love you, Bud, Take care, Dylan all Hello, hello, hello, hello, hello,

438
00:28:14,359 --> 00:28:15,560
Speaker 2: Hello is this Alisa?

439
00:28:17,040 --> 00:28:19,960
Speaker 5: This is Alisa. Hello. How are you doing all right?

440
00:28:21,119 --> 00:28:26,040
Speaker 2: I'm hanging out, Alisa. Uh, I'm a gecko on the computer.

441
00:28:26,160 --> 00:28:29,879
Speaker 2: I'm living life as best as I can. I hope

442
00:28:30,119 --> 00:28:30,879
Speaker 2: what's going on with you?

443
00:28:33,280 --> 00:28:36,600
Speaker 5: Well, I just had some positivity to share with you today.

444
00:28:37,200 --> 00:28:38,400
Speaker 2: Oh please hit me.

445
00:28:40,240 --> 00:28:41,040
Speaker 3: So on the.

446
00:28:41,040 --> 00:28:46,840
Speaker 5: Topic of large boobs, I actually had gigantic, huge boobs

447
00:28:47,320 --> 00:28:53,680
Speaker 5: and I recently got them chopped. And the positive news, yes,

448
00:28:54,200 --> 00:28:57,280
Speaker 5: I did. And the positive news about this is that

449
00:28:57,360 --> 00:29:01,680
Speaker 5: it is the most life changing thing, most positive things

450
00:29:02,280 --> 00:29:04,880
Speaker 5: I could have ever done for myself. And I feel

451
00:29:05,040 --> 00:29:08,880
Speaker 5: like a new woman, completely a new person. I feel free.

452
00:29:11,320 --> 00:29:15,400
Speaker 2: What inspired you to do? The shopping.

453
00:29:17,280 --> 00:29:22,760
Speaker 5: So happy, Marge? Booths is very difficult. It actually hinders

454
00:29:22,800 --> 00:29:26,960
Speaker 5: your movement a lot more than I realized until now.

455
00:29:28,000 --> 00:29:31,320
Speaker 5: And I can't buy like bras anywhere. I have to

456
00:29:31,400 --> 00:29:34,680
Speaker 5: like special order them for like seventy or eighty bucks

457
00:29:34,720 --> 00:29:37,240
Speaker 5: because like I had huge boobs, like I had to

458
00:29:37,240 --> 00:29:42,640
Speaker 5: buy like custom bros. And yeah, I can like run

459
00:29:42,720 --> 00:29:43,800
Speaker 5: up the stairs quickly.

460
00:29:44,840 --> 00:29:45,440
Speaker 1: It's crazy.

461
00:29:45,600 --> 00:29:49,160
Speaker 5: I'm just like my life has completely changed. They could

462
00:29:49,160 --> 00:29:52,440
Speaker 5: they took off ten pounds or like a little over

463
00:29:52,520 --> 00:29:53,600
Speaker 5: ten pounds.

464
00:29:53,520 --> 00:30:00,280
Speaker 2: Ten pounds total, I think it was total total. So

465
00:30:00,800 --> 00:30:05,240
Speaker 2: I'm curious, So, uh, you know, how long have you

466
00:30:05,920 --> 00:30:10,200
Speaker 2: had large boobs? And then what made what was like

467
00:30:10,360 --> 00:30:13,560
Speaker 2: the final straw where you're like, all right, I'm getting

468
00:30:13,560 --> 00:30:16,720
Speaker 2: these I'm getting rid of these guys.

469
00:30:17,800 --> 00:30:21,360
Speaker 5: Well, I had funny story is the first time I

470
00:30:21,400 --> 00:30:24,560
Speaker 5: remember my boobs like getting in the way of my life.

471
00:30:25,400 --> 00:30:29,200
Speaker 5: I was actually in third grade, and I remember I

472
00:30:29,240 --> 00:30:32,240
Speaker 5: like forgot to wear my like training bra to third grade,

473
00:30:32,240 --> 00:30:34,560
Speaker 5: which is like way too early to have a training bra,

474
00:30:35,640 --> 00:30:37,600
Speaker 5: and I forgot to wear it. And I remember like

475
00:30:37,680 --> 00:30:40,040
Speaker 5: calling my mom from the office and I was too

476
00:30:40,080 --> 00:30:43,240
Speaker 5: nervous to say the word bra, so I just called

477
00:30:43,280 --> 00:30:46,320
Speaker 5: and I was like, Mom, I forgot my underwear, Like

478
00:30:46,360 --> 00:30:48,640
Speaker 5: I don't have my undergarments because I didn't want to

479
00:30:48,640 --> 00:30:49,200
Speaker 5: say anything.

480
00:30:50,560 --> 00:30:56,080
Speaker 2: And because you're like on the on the phone like whatever,

481
00:30:56,120 --> 00:30:59,080
Speaker 2: the principal or office person is all like watching you

482
00:30:59,120 --> 00:30:59,640
Speaker 2: and shit.

483
00:31:00,720 --> 00:31:01,120
Speaker 7: Oh yeah.

484
00:31:01,120 --> 00:31:03,080
Speaker 5: And I went to a Catholic school, so they're like

485
00:31:03,160 --> 00:31:07,040
Speaker 5: staring at me on the phone and I'm like, yeah,

486
00:31:07,120 --> 00:31:10,920
Speaker 5: can you bring this and she yeah, she was like,

487
00:31:11,040 --> 00:31:12,600
Speaker 5: well you'll just last at the end of the day,

488
00:31:12,600 --> 00:31:15,760
Speaker 5: it'll be fine. I was uncomfortable all day and I

489
00:31:15,800 --> 00:31:17,479
Speaker 5: got home and my mom was like, why the hell

490
00:31:17,560 --> 00:31:20,320
Speaker 5: didn't you put on underwear this morning? And I was

491
00:31:20,400 --> 00:31:22,080
Speaker 5: like no, I didn't wear my bra and it was

492
00:31:22,080 --> 00:31:25,160
Speaker 5: really uncomfortable. And then ever since then, it's been like

493
00:31:25,320 --> 00:31:31,760
Speaker 5: exponential each year, like how big they got. And you know,

494
00:31:31,880 --> 00:31:33,440
Speaker 5: I was having a lot of back pain when I

495
00:31:33,440 --> 00:31:38,160
Speaker 5: got to into college and just genuinely uncomfortable, like couldn't

496
00:31:38,160 --> 00:31:41,760
Speaker 5: do things like the pendulum on my chest would just

497
00:31:41,800 --> 00:31:44,480
Speaker 5: like drag me in several directions anytime I tried to

498
00:31:44,520 --> 00:31:47,920
Speaker 5: be active or like you know, move my body like

499
00:31:47,960 --> 00:31:50,959
Speaker 5: a normal human. And I think I finally got up

500
00:31:51,000 --> 00:31:54,760
Speaker 5: to a thirty eight N and I was like all right,

501
00:31:54,880 --> 00:31:58,200
Speaker 5: like I literally can't do this anymore, like I've got

502
00:31:58,200 --> 00:31:58,920
Speaker 5: to get a reduction.

503
00:32:00,200 --> 00:32:02,480
Speaker 2: So yeah, they so they were growing, so they just

504
00:32:02,600 --> 00:32:04,520
Speaker 2: never stopped growing.

505
00:32:06,680 --> 00:32:08,920
Speaker 5: That's what I think. That's my theory, because they were

506
00:32:08,920 --> 00:32:12,160
Speaker 5: bigger every single year. Like I always was replacing bras,

507
00:32:12,200 --> 00:32:13,920
Speaker 5: and like I said, these things are not cheap.

508
00:32:15,760 --> 00:32:19,560
Speaker 2: So you went from an end to what are you now?

509
00:32:21,280 --> 00:32:23,320
Speaker 5: I'm like a handful now. I don't even know what

510
00:32:23,400 --> 00:32:27,680
Speaker 5: I am. I haven't even measured. I'm like wearing sports

511
00:32:27,720 --> 00:32:31,600
Speaker 5: bras every day sometimes brawless. I would guess that I'm

512
00:32:31,640 --> 00:32:35,080
Speaker 5: like a D or C now, which to me is

513
00:32:35,160 --> 00:32:38,080
Speaker 5: like minischool and very tiny and I'm very happy.

514
00:32:40,040 --> 00:32:42,160
Speaker 2: Yeah, this is a good PSA for other people who

515
00:32:42,240 --> 00:32:44,760
Speaker 2: are struggling with similar issues.

516
00:32:46,360 --> 00:32:48,680
Speaker 5: Oh yes, I have one hundred percent recommend it. I

517
00:32:48,720 --> 00:32:51,200
Speaker 5: know a lot of people kind of get caught up

518
00:32:51,240 --> 00:32:55,440
Speaker 5: and like the male gaze or like self worse things,

519
00:32:55,560 --> 00:32:57,200
Speaker 5: And I know that can be hard. But if you

520
00:32:57,200 --> 00:33:01,080
Speaker 5: can get through that, like truly, I feel like so free.

521
00:33:01,240 --> 00:33:03,520
Speaker 5: I don't think. I was asked the other day by

522
00:33:03,560 --> 00:33:06,760
Speaker 5: my partner, like what amount of money I would like

523
00:33:07,000 --> 00:33:11,080
Speaker 5: exchange now knowing how I feel, and like the amount

524
00:33:11,080 --> 00:33:13,040
Speaker 5: of money that I would exchange for how I feel

525
00:33:13,120 --> 00:33:16,560
Speaker 5: right now, and like every morning is like like I

526
00:33:16,600 --> 00:33:18,320
Speaker 5: would pay like all the money I ever earned in

527
00:33:18,360 --> 00:33:20,720
Speaker 5: my life to feel like this really okay?

528
00:33:20,760 --> 00:33:24,080
Speaker 2: So if somebody off if somebody offered you ten million

529
00:33:24,160 --> 00:33:26,080
Speaker 2: dollars to go back to the old boobs, to the

530
00:33:26,120 --> 00:33:27,920
Speaker 2: thirty eight ends, you would you would turn it down.

531
00:33:29,000 --> 00:33:32,920
Speaker 5: Oh my god, yeah, I'd turn it down for sure.

532
00:33:33,840 --> 00:33:37,960
Speaker 5: So low key debilitating. So it's kind of like a

533
00:33:38,040 --> 00:33:41,160
Speaker 5: disability almost.

534
00:33:40,320 --> 00:33:44,160
Speaker 2: The yeah, do you should be you should be able

535
00:33:44,160 --> 00:33:46,440
Speaker 2: to if if you have over a certain cup size,

536
00:33:46,440 --> 00:33:49,760
Speaker 2: you should be able to hang one of those Uh, uh,

537
00:33:49,880 --> 00:33:53,840
Speaker 2: disabled things that you're park in those spots.

538
00:33:55,480 --> 00:33:57,880
Speaker 5: Well, I don't know about that, but it's definitely bad.

539
00:33:57,920 --> 00:34:00,760
Speaker 2: There's a lot of things I could not do, so

540
00:34:02,120 --> 00:34:05,200
Speaker 2: were there And it sounds like, you know, obviously after

541
00:34:05,240 --> 00:34:09,440
Speaker 2: the fact, after the surgery took place, you're like, Okay,

542
00:34:09,719 --> 00:34:13,719
Speaker 2: so glad I did it. You know it was debilitating

543
00:34:13,760 --> 00:34:16,840
Speaker 2: and I'm in a new place. But I mean, beforehand,

544
00:34:18,239 --> 00:34:21,200
Speaker 2: before you knew how great it was going to be,

545
00:34:22,040 --> 00:34:25,640
Speaker 2: did you have any apprehensions going into it. Was there

546
00:34:25,680 --> 00:34:28,200
Speaker 2: any part of you thinking thinking not to do it?

547
00:34:28,320 --> 00:34:33,720
Speaker 2: Or was it a very much gung ho, no regrets,

548
00:34:33,760 --> 00:34:37,719
Speaker 2: go for it decision from the beginning that it that

549
00:34:37,800 --> 00:34:39,640
Speaker 2: it happened that you decided.

550
00:34:41,239 --> 00:34:44,000
Speaker 5: I would say, like at the very beginning, when it

551
00:34:44,080 --> 00:34:46,720
Speaker 5: first popped into my head, I was still like working

552
00:34:46,760 --> 00:34:50,440
Speaker 5: on some like yeah, like self warth issues or like

553
00:34:50,520 --> 00:34:53,759
Speaker 5: dealing with the melgaze, and like I'm not gonna lie,

554
00:34:53,920 --> 00:34:56,840
Speaker 5: Like I had really nice boobs. They were awesome. I

555
00:34:56,880 --> 00:34:58,840
Speaker 5: will say a lot of people with the ends of

556
00:34:58,880 --> 00:35:02,520
Speaker 5: the boobs I had, they were like damn near symmetrical too.

557
00:35:02,560 --> 00:35:06,080
Speaker 5: They were awesome. But as I the thought entered my

558
00:35:06,160 --> 00:35:08,920
Speaker 5: head for the first time, every time After that, I

559
00:35:09,040 --> 00:35:12,040
Speaker 5: just got closer and closer to being like, well, I

560
00:35:12,080 --> 00:35:14,520
Speaker 5: don't actually care because I want to be able to

561
00:35:14,719 --> 00:35:19,120
Speaker 5: like move my body and like not spend eighty dollars

562
00:35:19,120 --> 00:35:22,480
Speaker 5: on bras. And then yeah, it just escalated until I

563
00:35:22,600 --> 00:35:26,000
Speaker 5: was like, actually got on the wait list for the

564
00:35:26,080 --> 00:35:28,880
Speaker 5: surgery center and I told them to like call me

565
00:35:29,040 --> 00:35:31,560
Speaker 5: if any spots opened up. And one day they called

566
00:35:31,600 --> 00:35:34,160
Speaker 5: me and they were like, like, I was supposed to

567
00:35:34,160 --> 00:35:36,680
Speaker 5: be seen in like two months. Yeah, and they were

568
00:35:36,719 --> 00:35:39,239
Speaker 5: like two days, like, you just got to get a

569
00:35:39,280 --> 00:35:41,880
Speaker 5: COVID test, you got to be with the anesthesia screener,

570
00:35:42,560 --> 00:35:44,640
Speaker 5: make it down here. And I was like deal. I

571
00:35:44,680 --> 00:35:46,880
Speaker 5: called into work, took a week off. I was like,

572
00:35:46,960 --> 00:35:51,200
Speaker 5: I'm busy, went up there and did it. It was awesome.

573
00:35:52,719 --> 00:35:55,480
Speaker 2: I so, so before we go, tell us some other

574
00:35:55,520 --> 00:35:59,760
Speaker 2: things that you can now do now after the surgery

575
00:35:59,800 --> 00:36:01,440
Speaker 2: that you couldn't do before, so that we get a

576
00:36:02,120 --> 00:36:06,960
Speaker 2: idea of, you know, how debilitating it was to have,

577
00:36:07,440 --> 00:36:10,000
Speaker 2: you know, end cups.

578
00:36:11,200 --> 00:36:14,919
Speaker 5: Now I can go for walks comfortably and easily. Soon

579
00:36:14,960 --> 00:36:17,560
Speaker 5: I'm going to be able to run with doctor's orders.

580
00:36:17,960 --> 00:36:21,440
Speaker 5: I did a summersault the other day. Pretty sick.

581
00:36:22,680 --> 00:36:23,960
Speaker 3: In general, with ends.

582
00:36:25,280 --> 00:36:28,760
Speaker 5: Oh hell no, that shit is not is not comfortable

583
00:36:28,800 --> 00:36:29,080
Speaker 5: at all.

584
00:36:29,200 --> 00:36:32,279
Speaker 2: I would like hit you in the face, knock you unconscious.

585
00:36:33,200 --> 00:36:35,560
Speaker 5: Oh yeah, like I bet you I could hang upside

586
00:36:35,600 --> 00:36:37,640
Speaker 5: down now. I could not do that ship before I

587
00:36:37,680 --> 00:36:41,880
Speaker 5: would start choking. Mm hmmm, dead ass. So yeah, I

588
00:36:41,920 --> 00:36:43,680
Speaker 5: don't know. It's really awesome. I can do a lot

589
00:36:43,719 --> 00:36:47,360
Speaker 5: of stuff I'm really excited to, like, oh yeah, clothes,

590
00:36:47,440 --> 00:36:50,719
Speaker 5: I can buy normal sized clothes now, Like I don't know,

591
00:36:50,760 --> 00:36:53,960
Speaker 5: I can just be in general, like more active and

592
00:36:54,080 --> 00:36:55,839
Speaker 5: the more I heal, the more stuff I'm going.

593
00:36:55,840 --> 00:36:56,520
Speaker 1: To be able to do.

594
00:36:56,640 --> 00:37:02,040
Speaker 5: So truly, like, if anyone thinking about it, like do

595
00:37:02,120 --> 00:37:04,440
Speaker 5: your research and like go for it. I think the

596
00:37:04,520 --> 00:37:07,319
Speaker 5: benefits far outweigh the cost.

597
00:37:07,920 --> 00:37:13,800
Speaker 2: Well, Alicia, that's your name, right, Alisa, Alisa, Well Alisau.

598
00:37:15,360 --> 00:37:18,200
Speaker 2: Happy for you on your new found lease of life.

599
00:37:19,840 --> 00:37:23,760
Speaker 2: Hopefully you've inspired other people to you know, gain theirs

600
00:37:23,840 --> 00:37:26,680
Speaker 2: and all the power to you. Thank you for sharing.

601
00:37:28,239 --> 00:37:30,040
Speaker 5: Awesome, Thank you so much, love the podcast.

602
00:37:30,440 --> 00:37:32,160
Speaker 2: Have a good one, Thank you, Lisa.

603
00:37:33,920 --> 00:37:34,200
Speaker 5: Bye.

604
00:37:35,680 --> 00:37:40,359
Speaker 8: Hello, Alyssa, Hello, how are you doing?

605
00:37:42,920 --> 00:37:47,719
Speaker 2: I am a gecko on the computer. You know, I

606
00:37:47,719 --> 00:37:50,920
Speaker 2: have noticed I've been thinking about this. The audio version

607
00:37:51,000 --> 00:37:56,360
Speaker 2: of this show. They can't really tell that I'm a gecko.

608
00:37:56,440 --> 00:37:57,799
Speaker 2: Oh I don't know if they can hear it. And

609
00:37:57,840 --> 00:37:59,160
Speaker 2: it kind of doesn't matter.

610
00:38:00,200 --> 00:38:04,160
Speaker 9: Well with a picture on the podcast right now, So

611
00:38:04,200 --> 00:38:04,800
Speaker 9: maybe there.

612
00:38:04,719 --> 00:38:08,800
Speaker 2: Is together, you know, right right there is a picture

613
00:38:08,840 --> 00:38:12,520
Speaker 2: on the thing, you know. I mean, I could rather

614
00:38:14,680 --> 00:38:17,840
Speaker 2: not in a gecko thing and it would be the

615
00:38:17,840 --> 00:38:19,600
Speaker 2: same thing, but it kind of wouldn't be the same

616
00:38:19,640 --> 00:38:23,960
Speaker 2: thing and all. Also because being a gecko affects my

617
00:38:24,080 --> 00:38:27,200
Speaker 2: words and affects your words and whatnot. I feel like

618
00:38:27,239 --> 00:38:28,960
Speaker 2: you have a take on this, and I keep interrupting you.

619
00:38:31,440 --> 00:38:35,279
Speaker 9: Yeah, I have a lot to say, you know, I

620
00:38:35,320 --> 00:38:37,560
Speaker 9: think the gecko suit gives it like a little bit

621
00:38:37,600 --> 00:38:40,840
Speaker 9: more but like a little like a lot of a

622
00:38:40,880 --> 00:38:44,960
Speaker 9: lot more effect than maybe you would have if you

623
00:38:45,040 --> 00:38:46,239
Speaker 9: didn't wear the gecko suit.

624
00:38:48,000 --> 00:38:51,640
Speaker 2: M it's a little bit of extra. No, I agree

625
00:38:51,640 --> 00:38:53,360
Speaker 2: with you fully. I think it's a little bit of extra.

626
00:38:54,560 --> 00:38:59,680
Speaker 2: It's a slight bit of extra anonymousness. I know I'm

627
00:38:59,719 --> 00:39:02,560
Speaker 2: not innymous and my name is on the podcast and

628
00:39:02,680 --> 00:39:04,840
Speaker 2: I tell people my name is Lyle and stuff, but

629
00:39:05,320 --> 00:39:07,319
Speaker 2: it does I do want it to feel like you're

630
00:39:07,360 --> 00:39:12,319
Speaker 2: just talking to this entity that that barely exists. This

631
00:39:12,400 --> 00:39:13,160
Speaker 2: gettos like.

632
00:39:13,200 --> 00:39:16,360
Speaker 9: That won't judge you, And sure, yeah, I get what

633
00:39:16,400 --> 00:39:17,000
Speaker 9: you're going before.

634
00:39:18,640 --> 00:39:24,399
Speaker 2: But enough about me and my silly, silly predicaments. What's

635
00:39:24,440 --> 00:39:25,920
Speaker 2: going on with you Melyssa.

636
00:39:27,719 --> 00:39:30,360
Speaker 9: Well, it's a bit of a long story.

637
00:39:30,640 --> 00:39:34,960
Speaker 2: So what's the give me the give me the gist.

638
00:39:35,200 --> 00:39:40,080
Speaker 2: Let's Taran, Let's let's tarantino this. You know, let's start

639
00:39:40,800 --> 00:39:43,120
Speaker 2: with the let's start in the middle.

640
00:39:45,040 --> 00:39:49,000
Speaker 9: In the middle. Oh, well, the middle, that's probably be

641
00:39:49,040 --> 00:39:54,719
Speaker 9: the worst part. So basically the middle would be that

642
00:39:55,840 --> 00:39:57,919
Speaker 9: I found out that I was related to the guy

643
00:39:57,920 --> 00:39:58,640
Speaker 9: that I was dating.

644
00:39:59,440 --> 00:40:03,840
Speaker 2: That's the all that's you know what, that's a great middle,

645
00:40:04,360 --> 00:40:09,239
Speaker 2: that's a great hook I'm now interested in. Let's hear

646
00:40:09,280 --> 00:40:10,200
Speaker 2: the full story.

647
00:40:11,000 --> 00:40:13,520
Speaker 9: So basically, I met this guy on Tinder. I matched

648
00:40:13,560 --> 00:40:17,440
Speaker 9: with them, and I really liked him, and we've been

649
00:40:17,520 --> 00:40:21,439
Speaker 9: dating for about like six months now, and a couple

650
00:40:21,480 --> 00:40:24,520
Speaker 9: of weeks ago we took like a DNA test, like

651
00:40:24,560 --> 00:40:28,160
Speaker 9: an on an ancestry dot com. And I guess I

652
00:40:28,160 --> 00:40:31,040
Speaker 9: should mention that we had the same birthday when we

653
00:40:31,080 --> 00:40:32,759
Speaker 9: first met, but you know, a lot of people have

654
00:40:32,840 --> 00:40:35,040
Speaker 9: the same birthday, so we didn't really think anything of it,

655
00:40:35,160 --> 00:40:41,520
Speaker 9: you know, just a coincidence. But anyways, back to the story. Okay,

656
00:40:41,560 --> 00:40:43,520
Speaker 9: so we took it. We noticed we had a lot

657
00:40:43,520 --> 00:40:48,279
Speaker 9: of similar relatives. And I don't know if you heard

658
00:40:48,280 --> 00:40:51,319
Speaker 9: the part where I said we had the same birthday coincidental.

659
00:40:51,360 --> 00:40:52,920
Speaker 9: A lot of people have the same birthday. I know

660
00:40:52,920 --> 00:40:54,600
Speaker 9: it like five or six people that the same birthday

661
00:40:54,600 --> 00:40:57,920
Speaker 9: as me. But when we started figuring out we had

662
00:40:57,920 --> 00:41:00,520
Speaker 9: the same relatives on the ancestry dot com, Okay, this

663
00:41:00,640 --> 00:41:03,480
Speaker 9: is kind of concerning. So we brought it up to

664
00:41:03,520 --> 00:41:10,719
Speaker 9: our parents and sure enough, we are actually twins. And

665
00:41:10,800 --> 00:41:13,000
Speaker 9: the reason we didn't know is because we are separated

666
00:41:13,560 --> 00:41:17,759
Speaker 9: a month after we were born, because our parents got

667
00:41:17,800 --> 00:41:19,359
Speaker 9: separated and one took the other.

668
00:41:25,200 --> 00:41:28,120
Speaker 2: And your parents didn't know this.

669
00:41:29,920 --> 00:41:33,719
Speaker 9: Well, they didn't know, like they didn't keep in contact

670
00:41:33,760 --> 00:41:36,520
Speaker 9: with each other. I don't know why. It's really kind

671
00:41:36,520 --> 00:41:42,960
Speaker 9: of messed up. But yeah, I know, it's really really crazy.

672
00:41:44,760 --> 00:41:47,960
Speaker 2: So how long were you dating this guy before you

673
00:41:48,000 --> 00:41:49,000
Speaker 2: found out he was your twin?

674
00:41:50,600 --> 00:41:51,320
Speaker 9: Six months?

675
00:41:52,239 --> 00:41:52,920
Speaker 2: Six months?

676
00:41:54,320 --> 00:41:55,040
Speaker 8: Six months?

677
00:41:55,560 --> 00:41:56,360
Speaker 2: Did you guys?

678
00:42:00,640 --> 00:42:09,920
Speaker 9: Listen? I don't want to say listen, you can't. We

679
00:42:10,080 --> 00:42:14,000
Speaker 9: neither of us knew. And that's also another thing, like

680
00:42:14,080 --> 00:42:16,560
Speaker 9: I feel kind of gross about it? But should I?

681
00:42:16,800 --> 00:42:18,640
Speaker 9: Because should I? Because I didn't know?

682
00:42:20,880 --> 00:42:22,319
Speaker 2: How how do you feel about it?

683
00:42:24,400 --> 00:42:27,520
Speaker 9: I feel I do. I do feel kind of gross

684
00:42:27,560 --> 00:42:31,640
Speaker 9: about it, because I mean, who wouldn't. But at the

685
00:42:31,680 --> 00:42:34,359
Speaker 9: same time, like, I also feel so contradicted, like should

686
00:42:34,400 --> 00:42:37,839
Speaker 9: I feel bad when I didn't know? And I also

687
00:42:37,920 --> 00:42:40,480
Speaker 9: don't know if I should keep in contact with him?

688
00:42:41,560 --> 00:42:42,040
Speaker 9: He's here?

689
00:42:42,120 --> 00:42:45,080
Speaker 2: Actually, oh he's he's with you.

690
00:42:46,719 --> 00:42:47,480
Speaker 9: He is with me.

691
00:42:48,280 --> 00:42:51,359
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, let's get him on the phone.

692
00:42:51,640 --> 00:42:53,399
Speaker 9: Okay, you want to talk to him right now?

693
00:42:53,760 --> 00:43:04,520
Speaker 2: Yeah? Absolutely, okay, here he is. All right, So you

694
00:43:04,560 --> 00:43:07,320
Speaker 2: get sex with your sister. How do you how do

695
00:43:07,360 --> 00:43:07,720
Speaker 2: you feel?

696
00:43:12,800 --> 00:43:19,120
Speaker 8: Well, you know, you know, we didn't know. Uh, it's

697
00:43:19,200 --> 00:43:23,640
Speaker 8: kind of weird. I don't I don't really like it,

698
00:43:23,680 --> 00:43:27,080
Speaker 8: but you know, at the same time, I do care

699
00:43:27,120 --> 00:43:29,560
Speaker 8: about it, And you know, we've been dating for six

700
00:43:29,680 --> 00:43:35,160
Speaker 8: months and I don't know. I feel like you can

701
00:43:35,200 --> 00:43:36,360
Speaker 8: see how this is conflicting.

702
00:43:37,200 --> 00:43:44,319
Speaker 2: Mm hmm. So what's what's your guys' relationship? Like now, I.

703
00:43:44,239 --> 00:43:47,799
Speaker 8: Mean it's a little it's a little awkward now, but

704
00:43:47,920 --> 00:43:52,040
Speaker 8: it was going really good up until we found that out.

705
00:43:52,239 --> 00:43:54,920
Speaker 8: But now it's been a little Yeah, it's been a

706
00:43:54,960 --> 00:43:59,600
Speaker 8: little awkward recently. So yeah, we've been just been like

707
00:43:59,640 --> 00:44:01,439
Speaker 8: thinking what to do about it.

708
00:44:03,560 --> 00:44:09,799
Speaker 2: Have your parents gotten back together with each other when

709
00:44:09,920 --> 00:44:11,719
Speaker 2: when you guys were separated at birth, is it like

710
00:44:13,040 --> 00:44:16,160
Speaker 2: was it like one parent kept one kid, one parent

711
00:44:16,239 --> 00:44:17,560
Speaker 2: kept the other kid type of deal.

712
00:44:18,960 --> 00:44:19,160
Speaker 1: Yeah.

713
00:44:19,280 --> 00:44:24,080
Speaker 8: Yeah, my mom kept me and our dad kept her,

714
00:44:24,760 --> 00:44:26,640
Speaker 8: and they've both gotten remarried since.

715
00:44:28,320 --> 00:44:35,160
Speaker 2: So in these past six months, you never introduced either

716
00:44:35,239 --> 00:44:37,480
Speaker 2: of each other to your family.

717
00:44:40,960 --> 00:44:43,719
Speaker 8: Yeah, like like I met her parents and she met

718
00:44:43,719 --> 00:44:48,520
Speaker 8: my parents. They just like they had never like obviously,

719
00:44:49,840 --> 00:44:53,160
Speaker 8: we didn't recognize each other because we haven't seen each

720
00:44:53,200 --> 00:44:55,799
Speaker 8: other since like I was a month old, and they

721
00:44:56,239 --> 00:44:59,560
Speaker 8: kill our parents didn't keep in contact and they just

722
00:44:59,640 --> 00:45:03,000
Speaker 8: kind of read to each take one. I'm not really

723
00:45:03,040 --> 00:45:09,360
Speaker 8: sure because we believed our whole lives that are what

724
00:45:09,520 --> 00:45:12,200
Speaker 8: actually was our our stepparents, was our real parents.

725
00:45:14,760 --> 00:45:16,879
Speaker 2: Yeah, so this is sort of a lot of revelations

726
00:45:16,920 --> 00:45:17,359
Speaker 2: going on.

727
00:45:17,680 --> 00:45:21,640
Speaker 8: Yeah, yeah, it's a big it's a big life life thing,

728
00:45:21,719 --> 00:45:24,920
Speaker 8: not just a relationship. But so our parents have been

729
00:45:25,000 --> 00:45:28,799
Speaker 8: lying to us for sometimes twenty years.

730
00:45:29,160 --> 00:45:29,319
Speaker 4: So.

731
00:45:31,320 --> 00:45:31,719
Speaker 3: Mm hmm.

732
00:45:33,040 --> 00:45:39,480
Speaker 2: Okay, And have your parents, since finding out that you

733
00:45:39,520 --> 00:45:42,400
Speaker 2: two data for six months gotten back in contact with

734
00:45:42,440 --> 00:45:42,759
Speaker 2: each other.

735
00:45:46,200 --> 00:45:51,040
Speaker 8: No, no, they y. I don't really know. It's it's

736
00:45:51,080 --> 00:45:53,359
Speaker 8: been kind of awkward. We haven't really talked with our

737
00:45:53,360 --> 00:45:56,520
Speaker 8: parents that much since finding out because we've been kind

738
00:45:56,520 --> 00:45:59,000
Speaker 8: of like upset with them.

739
00:45:59,680 --> 00:46:00,560
Speaker 2: Do they do they know?

740
00:46:03,400 --> 00:46:03,640
Speaker 1: Uh?

741
00:46:03,719 --> 00:46:14,600
Speaker 8: Yeah, they they found out that war dating. Yeah, they

742
00:46:14,600 --> 00:46:18,560
Speaker 8: thought it was pretty weird as you can imagine.

743
00:46:21,000 --> 00:46:24,480
Speaker 2: Interesting. So so what what what do we think is

744
00:46:24,560 --> 00:46:25,040
Speaker 2: next here?

745
00:46:28,640 --> 00:46:30,600
Speaker 8: Well, you know, that's kind of why we're calling you

746
00:46:30,680 --> 00:46:36,439
Speaker 8: get because we're like, we do we keep dating? Do we?

747
00:46:38,920 --> 00:46:42,360
Speaker 2: I don't know. I think this one might be above

748
00:46:42,400 --> 00:46:44,799
Speaker 2: my pay right here? Have you spoken to a real

749
00:46:44,880 --> 00:46:45,759
Speaker 2: therapist about this?

750
00:46:47,560 --> 00:46:50,680
Speaker 8: We have not. No, this is you know, necess fairly recent.

751
00:46:51,520 --> 00:46:52,719
Speaker 2: Mm hmmm mm hmm.

752
00:46:53,719 --> 00:46:54,880
Speaker 8: Perhaps we should pick into that.

753
00:46:55,880 --> 00:47:00,760
Speaker 2: Yeah, totally. Well it's I you know, look, it's well,

754
00:47:01,239 --> 00:47:08,040
Speaker 2: it's nice that you guys are still friends. Yeah, yeah,

755
00:47:08,719 --> 00:47:09,960
Speaker 2: you know, friendship is important.

756
00:47:11,280 --> 00:47:14,640
Speaker 8: Yeah, yeah, you know it's good. You know, now I

757
00:47:14,640 --> 00:47:15,480
Speaker 8: have a sister.

758
00:47:17,000 --> 00:47:21,080
Speaker 2: Yeah. See, I think that's the truth, right, I think

759
00:47:21,520 --> 00:47:23,879
Speaker 2: you have to look on the bright side of this.

760
00:47:24,520 --> 00:47:28,120
Speaker 2: You may lose a lover, but you've gained a sister,

761
00:47:28,640 --> 00:47:31,960
Speaker 2: and that, at the end of the day is what's important.

762
00:47:33,840 --> 00:47:34,080
Speaker 3: Yeah.

763
00:47:34,280 --> 00:47:39,480
Speaker 8: Yeah, that's another point. I think to her, maybe let

764
00:47:39,520 --> 00:47:39,799
Speaker 8: me let.

765
00:47:39,760 --> 00:47:40,960
Speaker 2: Me, let me let me talk to her.

766
00:47:42,520 --> 00:47:48,480
Speaker 9: Here she is, Hello, Uh.

767
00:47:48,120 --> 00:47:52,880
Speaker 2: What did you say? Your name was, Alyssa? I think

768
00:47:53,320 --> 00:47:58,840
Speaker 2: I was talking with what's your brother's name? Boyfriend? Or

769
00:47:59,800 --> 00:48:04,440
Speaker 2: are talking with Archer and I think we've decided that

770
00:48:04,440 --> 00:48:05,719
Speaker 2: we're going to look on the bright side of this.

771
00:48:06,800 --> 00:48:10,719
Speaker 2: You know, you have lost a lover. You've lost a lover,

772
00:48:11,880 --> 00:48:18,520
Speaker 2: but in turn, you've gained a brother, which debatably is

773
00:48:18,560 --> 00:48:20,840
Speaker 2: more valuable because they'll be with you forever.

774
00:48:22,920 --> 00:48:26,680
Speaker 9: I guess you're right about that. I guess that's that

775
00:48:26,840 --> 00:48:30,600
Speaker 9: is a positive. I guess out of the situation.

776
00:48:34,160 --> 00:48:39,320
Speaker 2: Totally, totally, totally, Yep, we'll think of very much for

777
00:48:39,360 --> 00:48:39,920
Speaker 2: calling Elissae.

778
00:48:41,200 --> 00:48:42,719
Speaker 9: Oh, thank you, thank you very much.

779
00:48:42,800 --> 00:48:43,000
Speaker 1: Keke.

780
00:48:44,840 --> 00:48:49,919
Speaker 2: Those two are going to be fine. Those two are

781
00:48:49,960 --> 00:48:55,279
Speaker 2: gonna be fine. They have each other to guide them

782
00:48:55,320 --> 00:49:00,799
Speaker 2: through thick and thin. I think it's people. I'm actually

783
00:49:00,800 --> 00:49:07,560
Speaker 2: a little jealous, honestly about of how close of a

784
00:49:07,600 --> 00:49:11,319
Speaker 2: bond they have with one another. You know, I wish

785
00:49:11,320 --> 00:49:16,120
Speaker 2: I had that kind of, you know, closeness with another

786
00:49:16,160 --> 00:49:19,720
Speaker 2: human being in my life. Those two are blessed.

787
00:49:20,920 --> 00:49:24,960
Speaker 3: Stevie gags.

788
00:49:25,800 --> 00:49:26,400
Speaker 2: What's going on?

789
00:49:26,480 --> 00:49:26,680
Speaker 3: Man?

790
00:49:28,600 --> 00:49:35,680
Speaker 6: That's going how are you? I actually I hate I'm sorry.

791
00:49:35,800 --> 00:49:37,640
Speaker 6: You know, I've watched your streams so many times, and

792
00:49:37,719 --> 00:49:42,200
Speaker 6: I really hate when people ask that because I just

793
00:49:42,239 --> 00:49:44,440
Speaker 6: feel like you hate people asking you that.

794
00:49:45,239 --> 00:49:48,200
Speaker 2: Well, it's it's not. I'm not mad at the I'm

795
00:49:48,200 --> 00:49:51,239
Speaker 2: not okay, I'm not mad at the people. It's not.

796
00:49:51,840 --> 00:49:54,080
Speaker 2: It's a common thing to do. When you see somebody,

797
00:49:54,080 --> 00:49:56,399
Speaker 2: you ask them. It's an autopilot thing. I would never

798
00:49:56,440 --> 00:50:00,440
Speaker 2: be mad at somebody asking how they are. I'm not.

799
00:50:00,640 --> 00:50:02,399
Speaker 2: I don't think i'm mad at it. I think i'm

800
00:50:02,480 --> 00:50:09,120
Speaker 2: mad that it exists as a form of social programming.

801
00:50:09,520 --> 00:50:11,880
Speaker 2: But that fact that it exists as a form of

802
00:50:11,880 --> 00:50:15,920
Speaker 2: social programming is nobody's fault in particular. It's just a

803
00:50:17,040 --> 00:50:19,640
Speaker 2: natural occurrence. So I'm not mad at you or anyone else.

804
00:50:19,960 --> 00:50:21,160
Speaker 4: No, I get that.

805
00:50:21,239 --> 00:50:23,239
Speaker 6: It's the same thing that I get whenever I go

806
00:50:23,400 --> 00:50:25,920
Speaker 6: to the checkout line at the grocery store and they

807
00:50:25,960 --> 00:50:28,279
Speaker 6: feel like, how are you? You find everything okay? And

808
00:50:28,280 --> 00:50:30,880
Speaker 6: I'm always like, oh, you know, I just feel like

809
00:50:30,880 --> 00:50:33,800
Speaker 6: it's a you know, I just yeah, you know what

810
00:50:33,880 --> 00:50:34,160
Speaker 6: I mean.

811
00:50:35,160 --> 00:50:38,600
Speaker 2: So, uh, Stevie, how's it going?

812
00:50:39,200 --> 00:50:41,560
Speaker 3: How are you good man?

813
00:50:41,800 --> 00:50:45,200
Speaker 6: Well, you know, I got screened and I was just

814
00:50:45,239 --> 00:50:48,800
Speaker 6: trying to get some insight on a little thing where

815
00:50:49,960 --> 00:50:55,239
Speaker 6: kind of in the middle of a breakup and kind

816
00:50:55,239 --> 00:50:58,600
Speaker 6: of sprung upon me and I didn't really you know,

817
00:50:58,680 --> 00:51:03,200
Speaker 6: my credit shit, and you know, I started going on

818
00:51:03,280 --> 00:51:10,200
Speaker 6: Craigslist looking for potential roommates, and everything just depressed me.

819
00:51:10,480 --> 00:51:15,160
Speaker 6: So I just I, you know, I started thinking more

820
00:51:15,200 --> 00:51:19,000
Speaker 6: about the alternative, which is to become a homeless nomad.

821
00:51:20,880 --> 00:51:27,120
Speaker 2: Yeah, it says here that you're contemplating becoming homeless.

822
00:51:25,600 --> 00:51:28,880
Speaker 6: Yeah, voluntarily. It sounds way more exciting to me than

823
00:51:30,160 --> 00:51:32,600
Speaker 6: than anything else. Mm hmm.

824
00:51:33,280 --> 00:51:35,520
Speaker 2: So okay, tell me, tell me what about it feels

825
00:51:35,520 --> 00:51:36,200
Speaker 2: exciting to you.

826
00:51:37,600 --> 00:51:40,600
Speaker 6: Well, yeah, I have I have a pretty good job.

827
00:51:40,719 --> 00:51:42,359
Speaker 3: I make really good money.

828
00:51:42,160 --> 00:51:47,839
Speaker 6: And I'm trying to get away from that. And I

829
00:51:47,920 --> 00:51:50,480
Speaker 6: just think that the you know, I don't have the

830
00:51:50,520 --> 00:51:51,000
Speaker 6: money too.

831
00:51:51,960 --> 00:51:53,000
Speaker 2: I want to have.

832
00:51:54,719 --> 00:51:57,279
Speaker 6: I want to have more financial freedoms and stuff. But

833
00:51:57,320 --> 00:52:00,000
Speaker 6: I just feel like renting is kind of a scae

834
00:52:00,040 --> 00:52:05,680
Speaker 6: am and I just would rather not partake in that,

835
00:52:05,719 --> 00:52:09,279
Speaker 6: and I'd rather travel and become my own, you know,

836
00:52:10,440 --> 00:52:13,279
Speaker 6: my own person. Really, you know, it could just the

837
00:52:13,440 --> 00:52:16,160
Speaker 6: rent and everything like having a roommate, having to trust

838
00:52:16,239 --> 00:52:20,759
Speaker 6: someone that you don't really know, particularly, I don't really

839
00:52:20,920 --> 00:52:21,640
Speaker 6: know what else to do.

840
00:52:21,719 --> 00:52:28,319
Speaker 2: So so all right, So you have a job, and

841
00:52:28,400 --> 00:52:30,719
Speaker 2: I assume this is like one of those work from

842
00:52:30,719 --> 00:52:34,239
Speaker 2: home gigs that you can you're living the laptop lifestyle.

843
00:52:34,320 --> 00:52:36,640
Speaker 3: Is that when I'm hearing no, no, not at all.

844
00:52:36,800 --> 00:52:42,560
Speaker 6: I'm actually a freelance painter. I do interior homes.

845
00:52:42,560 --> 00:52:46,960
Speaker 2: Interesting, Okay, so are you planning on quitting your job

846
00:52:47,200 --> 00:52:50,600
Speaker 2: or are you going to keep your job but just

847
00:52:51,120 --> 00:52:52,919
Speaker 2: not have a place to live.

848
00:52:54,080 --> 00:52:56,520
Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm going to keep the job I work with.

849
00:52:56,719 --> 00:53:00,759
Speaker 6: I started at my own business, and yeah, I was

850
00:53:00,840 --> 00:53:05,080
Speaker 6: just like really thinking more about like taking up new

851
00:53:05,120 --> 00:53:09,280
Speaker 6: alternatives because you know, painting is really hard on the body,

852
00:53:09,760 --> 00:53:13,040
Speaker 6: and it's it's just really grueling work.

853
00:53:12,920 --> 00:53:14,800
Speaker 3: That I don't I can't do forever.

854
00:53:15,239 --> 00:53:17,680
Speaker 6: But you know, it's just like I said, that just

855
00:53:17,760 --> 00:53:20,759
Speaker 6: kind of backs up more about what I'm doing with

856
00:53:20,920 --> 00:53:26,040
Speaker 6: my time, and uh, I would rather find another avenues,

857
00:53:26,080 --> 00:53:28,759
Speaker 6: but like renting is just gonna slow it down because.

858
00:53:30,200 --> 00:53:33,040
Speaker 2: I guess I'm trying to get into the logistics of this,

859
00:53:33,400 --> 00:53:39,200
Speaker 2: because are you so your freelance painter? So do you

860
00:53:39,239 --> 00:53:42,600
Speaker 2: do you have to don't you have to sort of

861
00:53:42,760 --> 00:53:47,719
Speaker 2: be in one place, like do you? Are you? Is

862
00:53:47,719 --> 00:53:51,520
Speaker 2: your clientele all sort of centered around one location?

863
00:53:53,120 --> 00:53:57,520
Speaker 6: Yeah? Pretty much. Yeah, I'm out in I have a

864
00:53:57,520 --> 00:54:00,600
Speaker 6: certain town that I work around, and you know, I've

865
00:54:00,600 --> 00:54:04,040
Speaker 6: been in this one neighborhood and picking up business like crazy.

866
00:54:04,160 --> 00:54:08,040
Speaker 6: So yeah, I'm in one place and I'm currently living

867
00:54:08,120 --> 00:54:11,840
Speaker 6: in this in my in the same place as my

868
00:54:11,880 --> 00:54:14,560
Speaker 6: girlfriend as we've broken up and everything and everything is

869
00:54:14,600 --> 00:54:19,759
Speaker 6: cool there, but like you know, yeah, I do have

870
00:54:19,800 --> 00:54:21,040
Speaker 6: a place I need to be.

871
00:54:21,160 --> 00:54:25,200
Speaker 3: Every day, right, so long hours?

872
00:54:25,640 --> 00:54:28,840
Speaker 2: Right? So are you planning on shutting down your business

873
00:54:28,840 --> 00:54:29,480
Speaker 2: to go travel?

874
00:54:31,440 --> 00:54:31,720
Speaker 3: Yeah?

875
00:54:31,800 --> 00:54:35,680
Speaker 6: Eventually once I get a new thing lined up, like

876
00:54:35,760 --> 00:54:38,000
Speaker 6: I would, I want to become kind of a digital

877
00:54:38,080 --> 00:54:42,279
Speaker 6: nomad and travel around and just experience the world and

878
00:54:42,920 --> 00:54:45,600
Speaker 6: in my own on my own terms, you know.

879
00:54:46,560 --> 00:54:49,319
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, yeah, man, I've always wanted to do that.

880
00:54:50,840 --> 00:54:55,160
Speaker 2: I've always wanted to travel around and as you say,

881
00:54:55,280 --> 00:55:02,000
Speaker 2: experience the world on your own terms. And it sounds like, so,

882
00:55:02,320 --> 00:55:07,479
Speaker 2: I guess the what's what's the financial situation? Oh? Here,

883
00:55:07,520 --> 00:55:11,040
Speaker 2: do we have a nest stag of someting kinds or

884
00:55:11,080 --> 00:55:15,880
Speaker 2: something that's kind of the problem.

885
00:55:14,560 --> 00:55:18,560
Speaker 6: I've always had a problem with money, Like it's always

886
00:55:18,640 --> 00:55:22,040
Speaker 6: been my thing. Like uh and that's the reason why

887
00:55:22,120 --> 00:55:27,280
Speaker 6: this relationship kind of shipped the bed and yeah, yeah,

888
00:55:27,320 --> 00:55:29,520
Speaker 6: so my girlfriend kind of had enough of it. I

889
00:55:29,560 --> 00:55:32,440
Speaker 6: didn't know what else to do, and uh, I'm just trying,

890
00:55:32,680 --> 00:55:35,120
Speaker 6: like and now it's just kind of like more of

891
00:55:35,160 --> 00:55:38,600
Speaker 6: a thing that I've had to deal with it the

892
00:55:38,920 --> 00:55:41,520
Speaker 6: you know that's been presented to me with this breakup.

893
00:55:41,560 --> 00:55:44,440
Speaker 6: You know, I think you learn everything, you learn some

894
00:55:44,680 --> 00:55:47,479
Speaker 6: out of anything. Is there's always something to be learned

895
00:55:47,520 --> 00:55:51,120
Speaker 6: from it. And uh, this was the pretty serious relationship

896
00:55:51,160 --> 00:55:56,040
Speaker 6: of three years, and uh, you know, I wanted to

897
00:55:56,040 --> 00:55:57,719
Speaker 6: spend the rest of my life with her, but like

898
00:55:57,800 --> 00:56:00,879
Speaker 6: with this whole thing finance, as I said that that's

899
00:56:00,920 --> 00:56:05,360
Speaker 6: fair and uh yeah, I'm just like all right, well,

900
00:56:05,480 --> 00:56:07,799
Speaker 6: you know, if anything to be taken from it is

901
00:56:07,840 --> 00:56:11,279
Speaker 6: that I'm going to be more financially stable. And with that,

902
00:56:11,400 --> 00:56:15,880
Speaker 6: I'm like, you know, I told everyone I tell about

903
00:56:15,920 --> 00:56:19,480
Speaker 6: being coming homeless. They kind of you know, I'm thirty

904
00:56:19,719 --> 00:56:23,759
Speaker 6: I'm thirty five right now, and they're like kind of

905
00:56:23,880 --> 00:56:27,560
Speaker 6: get a little. Nobody really supports my decision, but I'm

906
00:56:27,600 --> 00:56:29,319
Speaker 6: kind of firm on what I want to do.

907
00:56:30,040 --> 00:56:31,960
Speaker 2: Okay, So when you say you're firm what you want

908
00:56:31,960 --> 00:56:36,760
Speaker 2: to do, you're this is are are we talking about

909
00:56:36,800 --> 00:56:40,719
Speaker 2: this right now? From your headspace of look, I'm going

910
00:56:40,800 --> 00:56:42,960
Speaker 2: to do it, but we're just you know here, I'm

911
00:56:42,960 --> 00:56:44,719
Speaker 2: gonna I'm going to talk about it. Are you Are

912
00:56:44,760 --> 00:56:45,759
Speaker 2: you firm in this plan?

913
00:56:52,880 --> 00:56:53,080
Speaker 3: You know?

914
00:56:53,160 --> 00:56:57,360
Speaker 6: The other part of it is, uh is going onto

915
00:56:59,000 --> 00:57:01,279
Speaker 6: And I don't think this is a healthier thing to

916
00:57:01,280 --> 00:57:03,319
Speaker 6: be doing at the moment because I'm still kind of

917
00:57:03,320 --> 00:57:04,520
Speaker 6: processing the breakup.

918
00:57:04,560 --> 00:57:06,520
Speaker 3: But like I started.

919
00:57:06,560 --> 00:57:11,040
Speaker 6: Going back onto the internet webs of dating, and okay,

920
00:57:11,080 --> 00:57:13,719
Speaker 6: that's the only thing that decurs me from doing this,

921
00:57:13,840 --> 00:57:16,280
Speaker 6: because I've started talking to some other girls, and you know,

922
00:57:16,360 --> 00:57:19,800
Speaker 6: it's just like, hey, you know, how do you Yeah.

923
00:57:19,680 --> 00:57:21,920
Speaker 2: And then they're like, hey, can I come over tonight?

924
00:57:21,960 --> 00:57:23,040
Speaker 2: And you're like, well about that?

925
00:57:24,400 --> 00:57:28,920
Speaker 6: Yeah exactly. I mean, I know it's just silly and

926
00:57:28,960 --> 00:57:31,600
Speaker 6: it's just kind of probably a distraction more than a

927
00:57:31,640 --> 00:57:33,680
Speaker 6: really serious thing, and it's probably not cool of me

928
00:57:33,760 --> 00:57:36,160
Speaker 6: to even interact with anybody at this moment.

929
00:57:36,280 --> 00:57:38,640
Speaker 2: But well, well, well hold on, We'll hold on that.

930
00:57:38,760 --> 00:57:40,360
Speaker 2: So here's what I mean. Look, here's the thing. If

931
00:57:40,480 --> 00:57:46,320
Speaker 2: if if having a partner is important to you, Look, man,

932
00:57:46,520 --> 00:57:51,400
Speaker 2: there's all there's all kinds of people out there. I

933
00:57:51,440 --> 00:57:55,080
Speaker 2: know this might sound crazy, but I think people get

934
00:57:55,080 --> 00:57:58,080
Speaker 2: stuck in that hole like, oh, women want a guy

935
00:57:58,280 --> 00:58:02,000
Speaker 2: like this who has a house or whatever. And look,

936
00:58:02,040 --> 00:58:05,760
Speaker 2: I'm sure a lot do. But I'm also sure there's

937
00:58:05,800 --> 00:58:10,040
Speaker 2: probably you know, plenty of women around the country who

938
00:58:10,040 --> 00:58:12,640
Speaker 2: are also like man, I kind of also want to

939
00:58:12,640 --> 00:58:15,600
Speaker 2: be homeless, you know, and maybe you guys hook up

940
00:58:15,600 --> 00:58:19,240
Speaker 2: and you travel around together. You know, Like, there's all

941
00:58:19,280 --> 00:58:21,800
Speaker 2: sorts of people who want all sorts of things. So

942
00:58:21,880 --> 00:58:24,200
Speaker 2: I wouldn't go ahead, I would I wouldn't go out

943
00:58:24,240 --> 00:58:29,920
Speaker 2: on a limb and saying that that you're closed off

944
00:58:30,240 --> 00:58:37,560
Speaker 2: to romantic engagements due to your situation. In fact, some

945
00:58:37,600 --> 00:58:40,920
Speaker 2: people might even find that attractive. As weird as that sounds.

946
00:58:40,960 --> 00:58:46,360
Speaker 2: But but but sort of what were you gonna say?

947
00:58:47,800 --> 00:58:50,240
Speaker 6: No, I was just agreeing with you pretty much.

948
00:58:51,040 --> 00:58:55,040
Speaker 2: But but forgetting about the sort of finding a girl

949
00:58:55,120 --> 00:58:58,680
Speaker 2: part of this, because I feel like that's that's sort

950
00:58:58,680 --> 00:59:03,760
Speaker 2: of as you're saying, like a distraction. What yeah, what

951
00:59:03,840 --> 00:59:08,400
Speaker 2: else is stopping you from from doing it? Have you

952
00:59:08,600 --> 00:59:14,520
Speaker 2: have you done any like worst case scenario thinking like,

953
00:59:14,720 --> 00:59:18,560
Speaker 2: is there any case scenario where you're you're gonna do

954
00:59:18,720 --> 00:59:21,360
Speaker 2: this and then four months later be like, oh, holy fuck,

955
00:59:21,360 --> 00:59:23,800
Speaker 2: I'm fucking screwed. Or is it like, like, what's what's

956
00:59:23,880 --> 00:59:25,439
Speaker 2: what's the worst case scenario here?

957
00:59:26,640 --> 00:59:28,800
Speaker 6: Well, I mean like I've I've never had a I've

958
00:59:28,840 --> 00:59:31,360
Speaker 6: never even had a passport, it would be honest.

959
00:59:31,680 --> 00:59:35,800
Speaker 3: So I mean, i've I've I've been to Canada.

960
00:59:36,040 --> 00:59:41,040
Speaker 6: So it's about the extent of it, Okay. But I

961
00:59:41,360 --> 00:59:44,720
Speaker 6: just kind I'm kind of a person that I just

962
00:59:44,840 --> 00:59:48,160
Speaker 6: like to go in deep with things and figure it

963
00:59:48,240 --> 00:59:53,640
Speaker 6: out from there. So I'm honestly confident with what I

964
00:59:53,680 --> 00:59:58,200
Speaker 6: want to experience and not really too worried about too

965
00:59:58,280 --> 01:00:03,600
Speaker 6: much of worst case scenario might get a problem overall.

966
01:00:03,720 --> 01:00:04,160
Speaker 6: I don't know.

967
01:00:05,200 --> 01:00:06,120
Speaker 2: I don't know.

968
01:00:06,160 --> 01:00:06,320
Speaker 1: Man.

969
01:00:06,360 --> 01:00:09,320
Speaker 2: Again, I'm not well, I don't know. Okay. So you

970
01:00:09,360 --> 01:00:13,800
Speaker 2: say you have a tendency to dive into things without

971
01:00:13,960 --> 01:00:19,560
Speaker 2: necessarily thinking them over, and you've been alive for thirty

972
01:00:19,600 --> 01:00:22,720
Speaker 2: five years, and I assume you've been like that for

973
01:00:22,840 --> 01:00:27,400
Speaker 2: several of those years, And how has this way of

974
01:00:27,520 --> 01:00:30,480
Speaker 2: operating served you in life thus far?

975
01:00:32,040 --> 01:00:36,360
Speaker 6: I've invested a lot of time and not much in return,

976
01:00:37,640 --> 01:00:42,600
Speaker 6: in finances and with time and energy. You know, for instance,

977
01:00:42,800 --> 01:00:46,919
Speaker 6: the house that I'm in with my ex girlfriend, I

978
01:00:46,960 --> 01:00:51,280
Speaker 6: was building a studio for music production because she also

979
01:00:51,320 --> 01:00:55,120
Speaker 6: does music production and stuff like that, and you know,

980
01:00:55,240 --> 01:00:57,960
Speaker 6: I invested mine because you know, I was considering with

981
01:00:58,080 --> 01:01:01,680
Speaker 6: her parents who owned the house. Actually they were gonna,

982
01:01:01,880 --> 01:01:03,800
Speaker 6: like we were talking about renting to own and all

983
01:01:03,840 --> 01:01:06,240
Speaker 6: that kind of stuff. And so I just kind of

984
01:01:06,400 --> 01:01:08,800
Speaker 6: counted my chickens before they hatched and started just like

985
01:01:08,880 --> 01:01:12,760
Speaker 6: tearing the room apart, rewiring, redoing all this stuff, and

986
01:01:12,800 --> 01:01:16,080
Speaker 6: then before I knew it, like things kind of ended.

987
01:01:16,120 --> 01:01:18,760
Speaker 2: So the relationship was over. And and that that whole

988
01:01:18,920 --> 01:01:21,280
Speaker 2: let's make a home studio was that a I'll dive

989
01:01:21,320 --> 01:01:22,880
Speaker 2: into it and figure it out as we go type

990
01:01:22,920 --> 01:01:23,200
Speaker 2: of thing.

991
01:01:24,280 --> 01:01:28,000
Speaker 3: Yeah, exactly, Oh totally. I mean even not just with the.

992
01:01:27,960 --> 01:01:32,120
Speaker 6: Idea of doing it, but just like also like doing

993
01:01:32,160 --> 01:01:34,160
Speaker 6: stuff that I had no idea how to do it,

994
01:01:34,200 --> 01:01:35,920
Speaker 6: but just figuring it out as I went along.

995
01:01:36,880 --> 01:01:39,560
Speaker 2: Okay, well, all right, you did that. It failed. But

996
01:01:39,720 --> 01:01:43,520
Speaker 2: yet here you are, do you have any deal? Are

997
01:01:43,520 --> 01:01:44,439
Speaker 2: you in debt at all?

998
01:01:48,440 --> 01:01:51,760
Speaker 6: I mean just with a little bit of taxes being

999
01:01:51,800 --> 01:01:54,040
Speaker 6: in ten ninety nine and stuff like that, but not

1000
01:01:54,040 --> 01:01:55,160
Speaker 6: nothing too insane.

1001
01:01:55,280 --> 01:01:59,320
Speaker 2: No, okay, you're not in any crazy debt. Sounds like

1002
01:01:59,360 --> 01:02:00,880
Speaker 2: I don't know why I'm saying it. Sounds like like

1003
01:02:00,920 --> 01:02:03,160
Speaker 2: this is not information I can gather but from your voice.

1004
01:02:03,200 --> 01:02:05,440
Speaker 2: But it sounds like you have all your arms and legs.

1005
01:02:06,160 --> 01:02:09,040
Speaker 2: Sounds like your heart's beating. Sounds like you're fucked up

1006
01:02:09,040 --> 01:02:11,800
Speaker 2: and you failed, but you're not dead. You don't have

1007
01:02:11,840 --> 01:02:15,840
Speaker 2: any kids, do you? No, right, you have any kids

1008
01:02:15,920 --> 01:02:17,439
Speaker 2: who who rely on you?

1009
01:02:18,760 --> 01:02:18,960
Speaker 6: No?

1010
01:02:19,680 --> 01:02:22,920
Speaker 2: I mean I mean, what's uh No, Pat's great. I

1011
01:02:22,960 --> 01:02:25,160
Speaker 2: mean I mean, what's it? What's it's? What's at stake

1012
01:02:25,200 --> 01:02:26,400
Speaker 2: here for you?

1013
01:02:26,760 --> 01:02:31,520
Speaker 6: I mean, just just my dignity from what my family

1014
01:02:31,560 --> 01:02:33,920
Speaker 6: and my friends see, because you know, they're you know,

1015
01:02:34,000 --> 01:02:35,360
Speaker 6: they reach out and be like, what are you going

1016
01:02:35,440 --> 01:02:35,640
Speaker 6: to do?

1017
01:02:35,760 --> 01:02:35,960
Speaker 9: You know?

1018
01:02:36,080 --> 01:02:37,040
Speaker 3: And I'm just like.

1019
01:02:39,320 --> 01:02:45,880
Speaker 6: Thinking just going to nomad homeless and uh and keeping

1020
01:02:45,960 --> 01:02:48,480
Speaker 6: my job and not getting involved in any drugs and

1021
01:02:48,560 --> 01:02:51,400
Speaker 6: not you know, keeping my head of like with the

1022
01:02:51,560 --> 01:02:56,280
Speaker 6: with the clear with a clear goal and uh, you know,

1023
01:02:57,160 --> 01:02:59,160
Speaker 6: doing what I want to do from this point on,

1024
01:02:59,360 --> 01:03:02,160
Speaker 6: you know, without any attachments. But then there's always the.

1025
01:03:02,200 --> 01:03:05,560
Speaker 3: Whole, you know, the loneliness and the you.

1026
01:03:05,480 --> 01:03:09,400
Speaker 6: Know, I still have my looks and my youth for somewhat, you.

1027
01:03:09,320 --> 01:03:10,440
Speaker 3: Know, like going online.

1028
01:03:10,480 --> 01:03:13,520
Speaker 6: I got some girls hitting on me and I'm reaching

1029
01:03:13,520 --> 01:03:15,440
Speaker 6: out to them and texting them back and forth.

1030
01:03:15,520 --> 01:03:19,360
Speaker 3: But like, yeah, I'm.

1031
01:03:19,000 --> 01:03:22,040
Speaker 6: More into you know, the balance between trying to figure

1032
01:03:22,040 --> 01:03:26,480
Speaker 6: out if the relationship versus the freedom to doing what

1033
01:03:26,560 --> 01:03:28,480
Speaker 6: I want to do, like has always been kind of

1034
01:03:28,480 --> 01:03:29,240
Speaker 6: a struggle for me.

1035
01:03:29,880 --> 01:03:32,280
Speaker 2: Well, you've been in a relationship for about three years,

1036
01:03:32,840 --> 01:03:37,400
Speaker 2: so I don't know if I don't know if if

1037
01:03:38,720 --> 01:03:40,439
Speaker 2: your whole thing is going to want to be let's

1038
01:03:40,520 --> 01:03:42,840
Speaker 2: jump back into another one unless if you find it

1039
01:03:43,000 --> 01:03:50,000
Speaker 2: right person. Yeah, but if if this is the song

1040
01:03:50,200 --> 01:03:55,080
Speaker 2: your heart is singing and all that hippie ship, and.

1041
01:03:55,240 --> 01:03:58,560
Speaker 6: I feel like taking a hippie shit like the lay lines.

1042
01:03:58,600 --> 01:04:00,160
Speaker 6: I don't know if you've ever looked into that, but

1043
01:04:00,200 --> 01:04:05,240
Speaker 6: like I felt that Colorado has only offers a lot

1044
01:04:05,280 --> 01:04:08,320
Speaker 6: of work and not enough play, and I think that

1045
01:04:08,360 --> 01:04:11,520
Speaker 6: there's other places that will offer some more like great

1046
01:04:11,600 --> 01:04:12,440
Speaker 6: things for me.

1047
01:04:13,320 --> 01:04:17,640
Speaker 2: Yeah, dude, I mean I'm bringing I'm making this about

1048
01:04:17,680 --> 01:04:20,240
Speaker 2: me right now. But I always think like if I

1049
01:04:20,320 --> 01:04:21,960
Speaker 2: you know, I got to be in this studio to

1050
01:04:22,040 --> 01:04:24,760
Speaker 2: do this podcast, and that's my gig right now. But

1051
01:04:24,800 --> 01:04:30,240
Speaker 2: I've always thought like, if I didn't have any like,

1052
01:04:31,440 --> 01:04:33,480
Speaker 2: any like I need to be at this place at

1053
01:04:33,520 --> 01:04:36,240
Speaker 2: this time type of type of thing, I'd probably do

1054
01:04:36,320 --> 01:04:39,600
Speaker 2: something similar. Man, I'd go to wherever they are. I

1055
01:04:39,640 --> 01:04:43,680
Speaker 2: would look up, you know, going Colorado Craigslist and be like, Hey,

1056
01:04:43,760 --> 01:04:45,800
Speaker 2: does anyone need me to dig a hole in the

1057
01:04:45,880 --> 01:04:49,840
Speaker 2: dirt for for a day for enough money to get

1058
01:04:49,840 --> 01:04:53,640
Speaker 2: me to the next day. I mean, I mean, fuck it.

1059
01:04:53,640 --> 01:04:55,720
Speaker 2: It sounds like you don't have a lot to lose,

1060
01:04:55,880 --> 01:04:59,120
Speaker 2: which in some cases, yes, is extremely lonely, but another

1061
01:04:59,160 --> 01:05:01,760
Speaker 2: case is extremely freedom and freeing.

1062
01:05:01,800 --> 01:05:04,600
Speaker 3: And yeah, you know, yeah.

1063
01:05:04,200 --> 01:05:08,959
Speaker 2: I I'm hesitating to tell you to do anything either way,

1064
01:05:09,000 --> 01:05:12,280
Speaker 2: but I I I think if it's if it's what

1065
01:05:12,320 --> 01:05:14,240
Speaker 2: you want to do and you've thought it out to

1066
01:05:14,280 --> 01:05:16,760
Speaker 2: the point where you're like, well I can give this

1067
01:05:16,840 --> 01:05:22,800
Speaker 2: a shot and I won't die right then, then then

1068
01:05:23,120 --> 01:05:23,640
Speaker 2: go for it.

1069
01:05:23,760 --> 01:05:26,400
Speaker 6: I think what happened. I think the clear is pretty

1070
01:05:26,840 --> 01:05:30,960
Speaker 6: the path is pretty clear. But you know, I just

1071
01:05:31,720 --> 01:05:34,720
Speaker 6: I really do put all my faith in a gecko

1072
01:05:34,840 --> 01:05:35,480
Speaker 6: on the screen.

1073
01:05:37,200 --> 01:05:43,320
Speaker 2: Well, uh, you know, I hope that you know that

1074
01:05:44,480 --> 01:05:49,600
Speaker 2: I'm not responsible for anything happens to you, if you

1075
01:05:49,640 --> 01:05:51,560
Speaker 2: take anything from this.

1076
01:05:51,560 --> 01:05:54,160
Speaker 6: Call before we go, I was just one thing I've

1077
01:05:54,160 --> 01:05:57,640
Speaker 6: always wanted to know because I've heard you brought it

1078
01:05:57,720 --> 01:06:00,480
Speaker 6: up a couple of a few times about the makeup

1079
01:06:00,560 --> 01:06:04,600
Speaker 6: that you wear. Yeah, And I was wondering if you

1080
01:06:04,600 --> 01:06:08,240
Speaker 6: thought of any alternatives, like with technology, like you know.

1081
01:06:08,720 --> 01:06:12,960
Speaker 2: Like yeah, people have always yeah, people have always told

1082
01:06:12,960 --> 01:06:15,240
Speaker 2: me I should do some CGI thing, But I feel

1083
01:06:15,240 --> 01:06:17,320
Speaker 2: like that would be cheating. I feel like I need

1084
01:06:17,360 --> 01:06:22,840
Speaker 2: to do the paint every or else it's not. But

1085
01:06:23,000 --> 01:06:26,480
Speaker 2: you know, man, all look all kidding aside, I genuinely

1086
01:06:26,480 --> 01:06:28,680
Speaker 2: do wish you uh good luck and whatever it is

1087
01:06:28,680 --> 01:06:31,360
Speaker 2: that you choose to do. And I'm inspired. I'm inspired

1088
01:06:31,400 --> 01:06:33,600
Speaker 2: by you as well because I you know, I met

1089
01:06:33,600 --> 01:06:38,440
Speaker 2: what I said. I I also uh dream all the

1090
01:06:38,480 --> 01:06:42,240
Speaker 2: time of leaving behind all of my obligations to go

1091
01:06:42,400 --> 01:06:46,440
Speaker 2: travel and live the digital life. And if the only

1092
01:06:46,600 --> 01:06:48,960
Speaker 2: thing holding you back, if truly, I mean, if you've

1093
01:06:49,000 --> 01:06:51,360
Speaker 2: truly thought about this in an objective way and the

1094
01:06:51,400 --> 01:06:54,439
Speaker 2: only thing holding you back is, as you say, your

1095
01:06:54,520 --> 01:06:57,760
Speaker 2: dignity and like what other people will think of you,

1096
01:06:58,160 --> 01:07:00,680
Speaker 2: I don't think that's worth a whole lot in terms of.

1097
01:07:00,720 --> 01:07:04,160
Speaker 3: I don't think you there, so yeah, so you.

1098
01:07:04,120 --> 01:07:06,480
Speaker 2: Know, go with whatever you think is best if you

1099
01:07:06,520 --> 01:07:09,480
Speaker 2: if you can remove that from the equation the your

1100
01:07:09,520 --> 01:07:11,120
Speaker 2: your dignity and what other people think of you.

1101
01:07:13,800 --> 01:07:15,640
Speaker 3: Thanks le sure man.

1102
01:07:15,720 --> 01:07:17,640
Speaker 6: I really enjoyed this conversation a lot.

1103
01:07:18,640 --> 01:07:21,840
Speaker 2: I enjoyed it as well. Call us back, call us

1104
01:07:21,880 --> 01:07:24,880
Speaker 2: back in six months. Let us know where you are.

1105
01:07:25,640 --> 01:07:27,840
Speaker 2: Maybe you'll be in China or something that'd be cool.

1106
01:07:28,680 --> 01:07:29,160
Speaker 2: Send us a.

1107
01:07:30,720 --> 01:07:31,240
Speaker 3: Thailand.

1108
01:07:32,160 --> 01:07:34,800
Speaker 2: Yeah, dude, dude, all right, this is the last thing'm

1109
01:07:34,800 --> 01:07:38,320
Speaker 2: gonna say. I'm gona hang up, But I seriously in

1110
01:07:38,360 --> 01:07:40,360
Speaker 2: those I have moments of my life all the time

1111
01:07:40,400 --> 01:07:43,680
Speaker 2: where I imagine myself dropping everything and moving to a

1112
01:07:43,720 --> 01:07:47,000
Speaker 2: foreign country. And when that happens, I go to Airbnb

1113
01:07:47,800 --> 01:07:50,600
Speaker 2: and I search up. I go to Thailand or Vietnam

1114
01:07:50,680 --> 01:07:52,960
Speaker 2: or some shit, and I see these like apartments you

1115
01:07:53,080 --> 01:07:56,640
Speaker 2: can live in in Thailand for like like three hundred

1116
01:07:56,680 --> 01:07:58,800
Speaker 2: dollars a month or something that are super nice.

1117
01:08:00,240 --> 01:08:04,040
Speaker 6: Much while I'm thinking it's beautiful, it's cheap, it's it's.

1118
01:08:03,920 --> 01:08:06,280
Speaker 3: Everything that I want. Yeah, and my lay lines.

1119
01:08:06,280 --> 01:08:09,200
Speaker 6: I was mentioning that my lay lines go there, and

1120
01:08:09,240 --> 01:08:12,520
Speaker 6: it's just like everything that says go there, versus here

1121
01:08:12,760 --> 01:08:17,200
Speaker 6: just says work, work, work, Yeah.

1122
01:08:16,040 --> 01:08:19,240
Speaker 2: Ah, go to Thailand. Go to Thailand. See if you

1123
01:08:19,280 --> 01:08:22,200
Speaker 2: can get a job digging a hole or whatever. It

1124
01:08:22,320 --> 01:08:24,080
Speaker 2: is enough to pay the rent for your two hundred

1125
01:08:24,120 --> 01:08:27,040
Speaker 2: dollars a month apartment and heal the sun on your

1126
01:08:27,080 --> 01:08:30,280
Speaker 2: skin and breathe the air and see what you can

1127
01:08:30,320 --> 01:08:34,840
Speaker 2: make out of that. Hell yeah, beautiful. Talk to you soon, Steve.

1128
01:08:35,960 --> 01:08:36,280
Speaker 3: Bye.

1129
01:08:43,760 --> 01:08:47,599
Speaker 2: See. I don't I don't know. This is why again.

1130
01:08:47,720 --> 01:08:52,200
Speaker 2: I I'm I'm the king of having an advice podcast

1131
01:08:52,240 --> 01:08:57,040
Speaker 2: where I disclaimed that I don't give advice, but uh, man,

1132
01:08:57,080 --> 01:08:59,800
Speaker 2: I really felt that, guy, man, I I mean it.

1133
01:08:59,840 --> 01:09:01,479
Speaker 2: I I think all the time about that kind of shit,

1134
01:09:02,439 --> 01:09:08,040
Speaker 2: like just being a nomad, right, because you only, like,

1135
01:09:08,560 --> 01:09:13,560
Speaker 2: if we want to get into our sort of ethereal headspace.

1136
01:09:14,040 --> 01:09:20,400
Speaker 2: You really do only live one life. And I don't

1137
01:09:20,400 --> 01:09:22,080
Speaker 2: know about you, guys, but I want to try to

1138
01:09:22,160 --> 01:09:25,479
Speaker 2: see as many things as I can see before I die.

1139
01:09:27,360 --> 01:09:28,920
Speaker 2: And I mean that's a luxury. Not a lot of

1140
01:09:28,920 --> 01:09:30,680
Speaker 2: people get to do that. A lot of people, you know,

1141
01:09:31,360 --> 01:09:34,360
Speaker 2: are sort of bound to staying in one place at

1142
01:09:34,360 --> 01:09:36,200
Speaker 2: one time. But I don't know, we have so many

1143
01:09:36,200 --> 01:09:39,599
Speaker 2: opportunities thanks to the Internet. There's couch surfing, there's we work,

1144
01:09:39,720 --> 01:09:42,679
Speaker 2: there's not not we work. What's what's the fucking work away?

1145
01:09:42,760 --> 01:09:47,479
Speaker 2: There's work away. There's Craigslist where you really can just

1146
01:09:47,560 --> 01:09:51,160
Speaker 2: like go to a place, go on the internet, find

1147
01:09:51,160 --> 01:09:55,720
Speaker 2: a gig, find a fucking place to live, and then

1148
01:09:55,920 --> 01:10:02,519
Speaker 2: just walk around. I really would like to believe that

1149
01:10:03,160 --> 01:10:07,280
Speaker 2: unless if you go to jail for a long time,

1150
01:10:07,920 --> 01:10:10,479
Speaker 2: or get somebody pregnant and have a child, or get

1151
01:10:10,479 --> 01:10:13,880
Speaker 2: pregnant yourself and have a child, you can kind of

1152
01:10:13,920 --> 01:10:18,000
Speaker 2: do whatever, and all you gotta do is not die.

1153
01:10:18,840 --> 01:10:22,080
Speaker 2: At the end of the day, if Steve can accomplish

1154
01:10:22,080 --> 01:10:26,840
Speaker 2: his goals and not have a child, not go to jail,

1155
01:10:26,920 --> 01:10:31,880
Speaker 2: and not die, he'll be fine. He mentioned. The only

1156
01:10:31,920 --> 01:10:34,639
Speaker 2: thing that was fucking with him was the what people

1157
01:10:34,680 --> 01:10:39,360
Speaker 2: thought of him. But now that's a fake thing. Dying,

1158
01:10:41,000 --> 01:10:45,320
Speaker 2: having a child, going to jail all very real things.

1159
01:10:46,040 --> 01:10:47,920
Speaker 2: But what your parents think of you and what your

1160
01:10:47,920 --> 01:10:50,760
Speaker 2: friends think of you, I would I would say as

1161
01:10:50,800 --> 01:11:00,599
Speaker 2: not Hello, Hi, Hey is this Millie?

1162
01:11:00,840 --> 01:11:01,559
Speaker 7: It is Millie?

1163
01:11:02,560 --> 01:11:06,559
Speaker 2: Millie? How is life? What is life like?

1164
01:11:06,600 --> 01:11:09,719
Speaker 7: For life? Life is shit for Millie.

1165
01:11:09,880 --> 01:11:12,040
Speaker 1: But we're not going to talk about that. Today we're

1166
01:11:12,080 --> 01:11:13,400
Speaker 1: talking about something else.

1167
01:11:13,840 --> 01:11:15,599
Speaker 2: Okay, beautiful, what are we talking about?

1168
01:11:16,760 --> 01:11:16,840
Speaker 3: So?

1169
01:11:17,320 --> 01:11:20,280
Speaker 7: I haven't set foot in a Taco Bell in over

1170
01:11:20,400 --> 01:11:25,320
Speaker 7: ten years, and I really want, I really want to

1171
01:11:25,320 --> 01:11:31,920
Speaker 7: eat taco bell again. So as a kid, I used

1172
01:11:31,920 --> 01:11:35,760
Speaker 7: to frequent Taco Bell a lot. But I just I

1173
01:11:35,800 --> 01:11:39,720
Speaker 7: guess this is just one of those days where we

1174
01:11:39,760 --> 01:11:42,439
Speaker 7: went in, we ordered, we ate, and then I came

1175
01:11:42,560 --> 01:11:47,200
Speaker 7: home and everything was going fine. I was like playing

1176
01:11:47,200 --> 01:11:49,400
Speaker 7: on the couch with my brother and my sister and

1177
01:11:49,479 --> 01:11:58,320
Speaker 7: I just projectile vomited all over over my sister. And

1178
01:11:59,520 --> 01:12:02,320
Speaker 7: ever since that happened to me at the age of eleven,

1179
01:12:03,840 --> 01:12:07,360
Speaker 7: I've been definitely afraid of eating taco Bell.

1180
01:12:09,040 --> 01:12:11,639
Speaker 2: Because you're afraid that you will once again projectile vomit

1181
01:12:11,720 --> 01:12:21,599
Speaker 2: upon someone. Yes, yes, So why do you crave taco

1182
01:12:21,680 --> 01:12:24,360
Speaker 2: Bell if you believe it will make you projectile vomit?

1183
01:12:25,800 --> 01:12:28,960
Speaker 7: Well, I've just been seeing these ads for Taco Bell,

1184
01:12:29,200 --> 01:12:31,759
Speaker 7: Like people talk about the Box, I haven't.

1185
01:12:31,520 --> 01:12:32,640
Speaker 2: Seen these ads for Taco Bell.

1186
01:12:32,640 --> 01:12:38,800
Speaker 7: They're amazing, and the the Darrito Local Taco and some

1187
01:12:38,960 --> 01:12:43,360
Speaker 7: Crispy Chicken Tender taco recently, and I just like I've

1188
01:12:43,360 --> 01:12:46,959
Speaker 7: missed out on the case so Rito the NATO Prize.

1189
01:12:47,600 --> 01:12:54,920
Speaker 2: Yeah, well okay, well Millie, well Millie, Millie, Millie, I mean,

1190
01:12:55,360 --> 01:13:01,320
Speaker 2: what's stopping you from okay? So your oh okay, First

1191
01:13:01,360 --> 01:13:04,920
Speaker 2: of all, First of all, before we get deeper into

1192
01:13:04,960 --> 01:13:08,080
Speaker 2: this conversation, is this real? Is this serious thing?

1193
01:13:08,520 --> 01:13:09,439
Speaker 1: This is real?

1194
01:13:10,160 --> 01:13:13,960
Speaker 7: I can't do it, Like I can't even go in

1195
01:13:14,240 --> 01:13:18,080
Speaker 7: like a Taco Bell drive through without wanting to vomit.

1196
01:13:18,280 --> 01:13:19,280
Speaker 7: Like I can't do it.

1197
01:13:19,800 --> 01:13:23,280
Speaker 2: Why don't you have somebody else bring you the food

1198
01:13:23,920 --> 01:13:24,519
Speaker 2: or order it?

1199
01:13:25,040 --> 01:13:28,200
Speaker 7: I can't, Like I can't even smell it, like just

1200
01:13:28,760 --> 01:13:32,400
Speaker 7: It's just I can't do it. And I see people

1201
01:13:32,439 --> 01:13:35,040
Speaker 7: eat it like I can, like online like the milk Bong,

1202
01:13:35,400 --> 01:13:38,840
Speaker 7: like on YouTube, I will I see people who eat

1203
01:13:39,000 --> 01:13:39,800
Speaker 7: Taco Bell and.

1204
01:13:39,840 --> 01:13:43,360
Speaker 2: Like, so okay, so all right, so you can watch

1205
01:13:43,439 --> 01:13:46,080
Speaker 2: people eat it both in real life. Can you if

1206
01:13:46,400 --> 01:13:48,479
Speaker 2: somebody is next to you eating it, will that gross

1207
01:13:48,520 --> 01:13:48,800
Speaker 2: you out?

1208
01:13:49,880 --> 01:13:50,080
Speaker 7: Yeah?

1209
01:13:51,920 --> 01:13:55,520
Speaker 2: Yeah, So I don't know what I'm having trouble understanding

1210
01:13:56,000 --> 01:14:00,439
Speaker 2: your Like this is one of the most contrad victory

1211
01:14:00,520 --> 01:14:07,400
Speaker 2: things I think I've ever heard, uh that you're insanely

1212
01:14:07,680 --> 01:14:11,880
Speaker 2: grossed out by Taco Bell if you smell it you

1213
01:14:11,920 --> 01:14:14,840
Speaker 2: want to throw up. If someone's near you, you're grossed out,

1214
01:14:15,400 --> 01:14:18,400
Speaker 2: But as much as you are grossed out by it,

1215
01:14:19,479 --> 01:14:22,800
Speaker 2: you decire to eat it. That doesn't make any sense

1216
01:14:22,840 --> 01:14:23,040
Speaker 2: to me.

1217
01:14:24,160 --> 01:14:27,160
Speaker 7: No, I know, but I just I have to eat it.

1218
01:14:27,160 --> 01:14:30,120
Speaker 7: It's like I have to, but I physically can't. And

1219
01:14:30,200 --> 01:14:33,400
Speaker 7: I've tried. I've tried, like just walking into a Taco

1220
01:14:33,439 --> 01:14:37,559
Speaker 7: Bell and I walk right back out. It's like I

1221
01:14:37,560 --> 01:14:38,360
Speaker 7: can't even get a truth.

1222
01:14:38,400 --> 01:14:39,880
Speaker 2: Really, I'm gonna tell you the truth. I'm gonna tell

1223
01:14:39,880 --> 01:14:41,360
Speaker 2: you the truth. I'm gonna tell you the truth because

1224
01:14:41,360 --> 01:14:43,679
Speaker 2: I've eaten. I've eaten a lot of Taco Bell and

1225
01:14:44,000 --> 01:14:47,240
Speaker 2: I don't here's the thing, and I'm gonna be honest

1226
01:14:47,280 --> 01:14:51,000
Speaker 2: with you. Okay, I've eaten a lot of Taco Bell,

1227
01:14:51,920 --> 01:14:58,080
Speaker 2: and I don't regret a single trip I have ever

1228
01:14:58,200 --> 01:15:00,320
Speaker 2: taken to a Taco Bell. When I I am on

1229
01:15:00,439 --> 01:15:03,519
Speaker 2: my deathbed and my life flashes before my eyes and

1230
01:15:03,600 --> 01:15:06,880
Speaker 2: I'm watching a reel of probably a lot of stuff

1231
01:15:06,920 --> 01:15:10,559
Speaker 2: that I won't be proud of. But when the parts

1232
01:15:10,600 --> 01:15:12,439
Speaker 2: of my life in which I'm sitting at a Taco

1233
01:15:12,439 --> 01:15:16,240
Speaker 2: belt drive through passed by that reel, okay, I will

1234
01:15:16,280 --> 01:15:22,640
Speaker 2: I will smile. I will be happy. But Millie, yeah,

1235
01:15:23,120 --> 01:15:30,000
Speaker 2: you can live life without it. In fact, I feel

1236
01:15:30,040 --> 01:15:32,320
Speaker 2: like there's a chance for your life to be better

1237
01:15:33,200 --> 01:15:36,439
Speaker 2: with the absence of Taco Bell, and I think you

1238
01:15:36,560 --> 01:15:42,439
Speaker 2: gotta embrace that, Millie. Okay, but Millie, you can't focus

1239
01:15:42,560 --> 01:15:46,080
Speaker 2: on what you've missed out on. Okay, There's plenty of

1240
01:15:46,120 --> 01:15:49,559
Speaker 2: other good food options out there. There's Dell Taco, There's

1241
01:15:49,680 --> 01:15:53,640
Speaker 2: there's non taco related fast food to whatever, Chick fil a,

1242
01:15:53,760 --> 01:15:56,920
Speaker 2: Jack in the box, yeah, Sonic, there's all sorts of

1243
01:15:57,160 --> 01:16:03,160
Speaker 2: there's there's there's a whole world of cuisine out there, Millie,

1244
01:16:03,800 --> 01:16:07,519
Speaker 2: outside of just Taco Bell. And the more time you

1245
01:16:07,560 --> 01:16:11,720
Speaker 2: spend fixating on what you cannot have, the more you

1246
01:16:11,760 --> 01:16:14,559
Speaker 2: will be obsessed with it, the more it will ruin you.

1247
01:16:15,400 --> 01:16:19,559
Speaker 2: So so I encourage you to widen your field of

1248
01:16:19,680 --> 01:16:28,080
Speaker 2: vision and and embrace the other options that are in

1249
01:16:28,120 --> 01:16:32,360
Speaker 2: front of you, because if you're so narrow, so narrow,

1250
01:16:32,800 --> 01:16:37,479
Speaker 2: focused on the Taco Bell, you won't see the A

1251
01:16:37,640 --> 01:16:41,320
Speaker 2: and W right next to the Taco Bell, which has

1252
01:16:41,439 --> 01:16:44,920
Speaker 2: delicious chicken sandwiches and milkshakes, and you can and you

1253
01:16:44,920 --> 01:16:46,720
Speaker 2: can dip the chicken sandwich in the milkshake, and you

1254
01:16:46,760 --> 01:16:51,880
Speaker 2: can eat that. So I encourage you not to focus

1255
01:16:52,560 --> 01:16:56,600
Speaker 2: on the options unavailable to you, but instead to to

1256
01:16:57,560 --> 01:17:03,360
Speaker 2: uh take take me marrymant and and experienced, wonder at

1257
01:17:03,400 --> 01:17:04,280
Speaker 2: the options that are.

1258
01:17:06,000 --> 01:17:08,640
Speaker 7: Yeah, but it's like, did you ever eat at a

1259
01:17:08,680 --> 01:17:09,280
Speaker 7: local paco?

1260
01:17:10,880 --> 01:17:12,840
Speaker 2: I have? I have eaten a taco?

1261
01:17:13,720 --> 01:17:14,360
Speaker 7: Are they good?

1262
01:17:14,600 --> 01:17:15,719
Speaker 3: I want phenomenal people.

1263
01:17:18,320 --> 01:17:22,120
Speaker 2: Yeah, they're great. It's mild sauce on there. It's fantastic.

1264
01:17:22,160 --> 01:17:24,040
Speaker 2: It's the best thing I've ever read. But Millie, You'll

1265
01:17:24,080 --> 01:17:24,920
Speaker 2: be fine without it.

1266
01:17:26,760 --> 01:17:31,880
Speaker 7: I'll be okay without it. All right, thank you?

1267
01:17:31,920 --> 01:17:35,479
Speaker 2: Get go, Chris.

1268
01:17:38,200 --> 01:17:40,320
Speaker 4: Hello, Gek, how are you?

1269
01:17:40,479 --> 01:17:41,200
Speaker 2: Chris?

1270
01:17:43,160 --> 01:17:45,960
Speaker 4: I'm all right. Honestly, it's like the middle of the

1271
01:17:45,960 --> 01:17:49,000
Speaker 4: semester right now, and it could be better.

1272
01:17:49,960 --> 01:17:54,479
Speaker 2: It's the middle of the semester. What do you study?

1273
01:17:55,160 --> 01:18:01,360
Speaker 4: Study animal science at in America? And like the pursuit

1274
01:18:01,439 --> 01:18:02,520
Speaker 4: of being a veterinarian.

1275
01:18:03,840 --> 01:18:06,720
Speaker 2: You're trying to be a veterinarian. You know. The veterinarian

1276
01:18:06,800 --> 01:18:10,040
Speaker 2: thing is interesting to me because it's a sort of

1277
01:18:10,080 --> 01:18:13,000
Speaker 2: a catch twenty two where in order to become a

1278
01:18:13,080 --> 01:18:17,280
Speaker 2: veterinarian you have to like animals, but also in order

1279
01:18:17,280 --> 01:18:20,760
Speaker 2: to become a veterinarian, you have to watch animals die.

1280
01:18:22,200 --> 01:18:28,000
Speaker 4: Every day, Like I mean, yeah, it's like you want

1281
01:18:28,040 --> 01:18:32,280
Speaker 4: to save animals and stuff, Like you can't be a

1282
01:18:32,360 --> 01:18:36,719
Speaker 4: hero and I'm like a believer and leave no trace

1283
01:18:37,000 --> 01:18:41,320
Speaker 4: like with boy Scouts and stuff. Sure, and like part

1284
01:18:41,360 --> 01:18:44,120
Speaker 4: of that is like respecting the life cycle of the universe,

1285
01:18:45,240 --> 01:18:48,200
Speaker 4: and like wherever it's time for animal to go, it's

1286
01:18:48,240 --> 01:18:53,519
Speaker 4: just time for them to go, yep, And like you're

1287
01:18:53,560 --> 01:18:58,200
Speaker 4: there to facilitate that. So like you can live with

1288
01:18:58,240 --> 01:18:59,720
Speaker 4: the fact that the animal is dying, but you can

1289
01:18:59,760 --> 01:19:02,559
Speaker 4: also to make it like comfortable on its way out.

1290
01:19:04,120 --> 01:19:09,240
Speaker 2: Right. No, there's definitely a lot of pride to be

1291
01:19:09,360 --> 01:19:13,719
Speaker 2: had in doing that, that job of keeping an animal

1292
01:19:13,800 --> 01:19:16,479
Speaker 2: comfortable as it's as it's passing.

1293
01:19:18,960 --> 01:19:23,040
Speaker 4: Yeah, it's like a respecting the way the life cycle.

1294
01:19:23,840 --> 01:19:27,720
Speaker 2: Yeah, this is interesting. So sorry, So you seem to

1295
01:19:27,800 --> 01:19:37,400
Speaker 2: have a very objective, relaxed take on death in general, right,

1296
01:19:37,600 --> 01:19:43,639
Speaker 2: leave no trace, So to leave no trace includes dying,

1297
01:19:44,280 --> 01:19:47,920
Speaker 2: Like you have to die as a necessary element of

1298
01:19:48,640 --> 01:19:53,160
Speaker 2: leaving no trace, because living living forever is kind of

1299
01:19:53,200 --> 01:19:55,480
Speaker 2: like littering with yourself.

1300
01:19:57,200 --> 01:20:03,240
Speaker 4: Mhm. Yeah, like leaving your mark on the world in

1301
01:20:03,280 --> 01:20:06,400
Speaker 4: a way, like because you're just like a you're like

1302
01:20:06,400 --> 01:20:08,240
Speaker 4: a six hundred year old tree.

1303
01:20:08,520 --> 01:20:09,200
Speaker 3: Yeah, you're there.

1304
01:20:11,160 --> 01:20:18,439
Speaker 2: So how so how is how is this perspective that

1305
01:20:18,520 --> 01:20:22,040
Speaker 2: you have on animals and how death is just factoring

1306
01:20:22,080 --> 01:20:26,479
Speaker 2: into great cycle and you know all that jizz? How

1307
01:20:26,520 --> 01:20:29,400
Speaker 2: has that impacted your thoughts on your own.

1308
01:20:29,200 --> 01:20:34,040
Speaker 4: Death, on my own death? The way I see it

1309
01:20:34,080 --> 01:20:36,320
Speaker 4: is like I try to keep a lot of things

1310
01:20:36,720 --> 01:20:40,880
Speaker 4: in terms of like valuable things, like if I lose something,

1311
01:20:41,120 --> 01:20:45,160
Speaker 4: I lose it. But I don't try to hoard things.

1312
01:20:45,320 --> 01:20:50,479
Speaker 4: I feel like hoarding the something that like every religion

1313
01:20:50,560 --> 01:20:53,800
Speaker 4: kind of taboos like that big thing is like the

1314
01:20:53,880 --> 01:20:58,439
Speaker 4: seventh or whatever sense with greed, like hoarding things. This

1315
01:20:58,520 --> 01:21:02,560
Speaker 4: isn't right. So like kind of just like having a

1316
01:21:03,040 --> 01:21:06,400
Speaker 4: detachment of like it's just an item. It is what

1317
01:21:06,439 --> 01:21:09,000
Speaker 4: it is, and like you're gonna die one day and

1318
01:21:09,040 --> 01:21:11,920
Speaker 4: you're not gonna have it you that's something to take

1319
01:21:11,960 --> 01:21:13,800
Speaker 4: away from all of those things.

1320
01:21:14,920 --> 01:21:19,160
Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah, it's sort of stomic philosophy having very little

1321
01:21:19,960 --> 01:21:26,200
Speaker 2: attachments to possessions or really anything outside of yourself or

1322
01:21:26,240 --> 01:21:31,520
Speaker 2: even yourself, because you know your friends, your family, your possessions,

1323
01:21:31,640 --> 01:21:35,519
Speaker 2: your statuses, No, none of that's coming with you where

1324
01:21:35,520 --> 01:21:36,080
Speaker 2: you're going.

1325
01:21:37,600 --> 01:21:40,800
Speaker 4: For real, but like you can't always plan on where

1326
01:21:40,800 --> 01:21:43,400
Speaker 4: you're going, and I think that's something to like push for,

1327
01:21:43,600 --> 01:21:47,040
Speaker 4: like having bucket list goals. Like right now, I'm checking

1328
01:21:47,080 --> 01:21:51,519
Speaker 4: off a bucket list talking to this gecko. This is cool.

1329
01:21:53,320 --> 01:21:55,160
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's cool talking to you too, Chris. I like

1330
01:21:55,200 --> 01:21:58,559
Speaker 2: your uh, I like your voice. You're very dreaming.

1331
01:22:00,200 --> 01:22:02,840
Speaker 4: I'm dreamy. I've had a long day. I've been up

1332
01:22:02,880 --> 01:22:04,080
Speaker 4: to like six o'clock.

1333
01:22:04,720 --> 01:22:07,799
Speaker 2: Yeah, whatever, your tired voices is very dreamy.

1334
01:22:09,720 --> 01:22:13,679
Speaker 4: Oh, thank you. I don't know. I'm also I'm kind

1335
01:22:13,680 --> 01:22:17,519
Speaker 4: of cold right now. It's like twenty degrees outside in

1336
01:22:17,600 --> 01:22:20,240
Speaker 4: my apartment complex. Isn't very well insulated.

1337
01:22:20,800 --> 01:22:23,120
Speaker 2: Well that's your By the way, take note of this

1338
01:22:23,160 --> 01:22:25,240
Speaker 2: because these are your variables. Next time you're about to

1339
01:22:25,240 --> 01:22:27,479
Speaker 2: go on a date, make sure you're very tired and

1340
01:22:27,640 --> 01:22:31,800
Speaker 2: very cold. And uh they'll they'll find that very attractive.

1341
01:22:33,040 --> 01:22:36,080
Speaker 2: Uh So, oh crap, you were saying something that I

1342
01:22:36,120 --> 01:22:40,080
Speaker 2: interrupted you with you just all that stuff. What the

1343
01:22:40,080 --> 01:22:47,679
Speaker 2: fuck were you saying about death? I just your bucket list. Okay,

1344
01:22:47,680 --> 01:22:50,000
Speaker 2: your bucket list, Your bucket list, all right, So talking

1345
01:22:50,000 --> 01:22:52,160
Speaker 2: to me is on your bucket list. Check what else?

1346
01:22:52,200 --> 01:22:53,280
Speaker 2: What else we got on there?

1347
01:22:55,640 --> 01:22:58,880
Speaker 4: I don't say my buckets. I want to I want

1348
01:22:58,880 --> 01:23:03,240
Speaker 4: to publish a paper and academia. That's a bucket list.

1349
01:23:03,240 --> 01:23:06,679
Speaker 2: Side on, that's a good one. Kind of boring.

1350
01:23:06,880 --> 01:23:07,439
Speaker 3: H but I'm a.

1351
01:23:08,920 --> 01:23:10,160
Speaker 4: Sophomore in college right now.

1352
01:23:10,360 --> 01:23:12,439
Speaker 2: Hm oh, I said it's kind of boring.

1353
01:23:12,479 --> 01:23:16,400
Speaker 4: But to each their own, Like, I mean, I don't know.

1354
01:23:16,439 --> 01:23:18,320
Speaker 4: It's just kind of something I look up to, like

1355
01:23:19,240 --> 01:23:22,760
Speaker 4: to have something so well thought out and then documented

1356
01:23:23,080 --> 01:23:26,120
Speaker 4: and then permanently out there, not like in the sense

1357
01:23:26,120 --> 01:23:30,439
Speaker 4: of in the natural environment, but like out there for

1358
01:23:30,840 --> 01:23:34,639
Speaker 4: future generations to read and like pick up on, even

1359
01:23:34,720 --> 01:23:38,360
Speaker 4: if it's something like super MENI school. You know, I

1360
01:23:38,360 --> 01:23:39,839
Speaker 4: don't even think I said that right.

1361
01:23:42,200 --> 01:23:44,360
Speaker 2: A minute, No, no, no, I'm just I'm fucking with you.

1362
01:23:44,400 --> 01:23:46,960
Speaker 2: And I said I was boring, but uh no, I

1363
01:23:47,000 --> 01:23:47,920
Speaker 2: see the value in that.

1364
01:23:48,200 --> 01:23:50,000
Speaker 4: I come back it up. I'll think it's boring. I

1365
01:23:50,040 --> 01:23:50,919
Speaker 4: think it's cool.

1366
01:23:50,800 --> 01:23:54,760
Speaker 2: Ship uh anything else? You are right, So you want

1367
01:23:54,800 --> 01:23:57,240
Speaker 2: to pas you you want to publish a paper in academia.

1368
01:23:57,280 --> 01:23:59,719
Speaker 2: I mean I mean that that could take a while

1369
01:24:00,400 --> 01:24:02,840
Speaker 2: doing that. So that's that's a big one. You probably

1370
01:24:02,840 --> 01:24:06,679
Speaker 2: got room for. You probably got room for like two

1371
01:24:06,720 --> 01:24:08,960
Speaker 2: other things you can do before you die? What what? What?

1372
01:24:08,960 --> 01:24:11,280
Speaker 2: What are you gonna do with those? With those two

1373
01:24:11,320 --> 01:24:11,840
Speaker 2: other things?

1374
01:24:12,000 --> 01:24:15,479
Speaker 4: So I like to pick up trash, like whenever I'm

1375
01:24:15,479 --> 01:24:17,519
Speaker 4: walking the class and stuff. I want to pick up

1376
01:24:17,560 --> 01:24:20,479
Speaker 4: somebody's like mobile order, like you know, like that you

1377
01:24:20,479 --> 01:24:23,840
Speaker 4: get from Starbucks, and I want to prank call them.

1378
01:24:27,560 --> 01:24:32,160
Speaker 2: You want to you basically want to like drive door dash?

1379
01:24:32,720 --> 01:24:35,599
Speaker 4: No no, no no no, Like if somebody's littering, like if

1380
01:24:35,640 --> 01:24:39,519
Speaker 4: they litter their like Starbucks drink and like I'm walking

1381
01:24:39,560 --> 01:24:42,240
Speaker 4: the class and it's on the sidewalk, I pick it up.

1382
01:24:42,760 --> 01:24:47,200
Speaker 4: I dole their phone number and I prank call them.

1383
01:24:47,240 --> 01:24:51,120
Speaker 2: It's a very specific item. Do people put their phone

1384
01:24:51,200 --> 01:24:53,920
Speaker 2: number on their Starbucks cups? Is that a thing?

1385
01:24:55,640 --> 01:25:00,200
Speaker 4: I know? Like whenever you order door dash, like on

1386
01:25:00,200 --> 01:25:02,599
Speaker 4: on the receipt, they'll have the phone number.

1387
01:25:03,240 --> 01:25:05,559
Speaker 2: Oh okay, So if somebody litters a receipt, you want

1388
01:25:05,560 --> 01:25:10,360
Speaker 2: to prank call them? Yeah? What what would your prank

1389
01:25:10,400 --> 01:25:13,120
Speaker 2: call be? Do you have one in particular setup?

1390
01:25:14,520 --> 01:25:17,479
Speaker 4: I have to think of it in the moment. I

1391
01:25:17,520 --> 01:25:20,559
Speaker 4: don't want to have it like filled with rage because

1392
01:25:20,600 --> 01:25:23,759
Speaker 4: like I don't like whenever people litter, but I feel

1393
01:25:23,760 --> 01:25:28,400
Speaker 4: like whenever you're mad at somebody. You're just encouraging the behavior,

1394
01:25:29,640 --> 01:25:29,800
Speaker 4: you know.

1395
01:25:29,880 --> 01:25:31,960
Speaker 2: I agree with that you got a good head on

1396
01:25:31,960 --> 01:25:34,040
Speaker 2: your shoulders. I agree with that you're not coming in

1397
01:25:34,080 --> 01:25:38,639
Speaker 2: here with rage because nobody, namely one person that's ever

1398
01:25:38,680 --> 01:25:43,280
Speaker 2: responded well to just getting cussed at or screamed at

1399
01:25:43,360 --> 01:25:48,000
Speaker 2: or whatever. It's not a it's never a convincing way

1400
01:25:48,040 --> 01:25:49,720
Speaker 2: of being.

1401
01:25:53,800 --> 01:25:54,240
Speaker 4: For real.

1402
01:25:54,400 --> 01:25:56,160
Speaker 2: But you do need to come up with something, because

1403
01:25:56,160 --> 01:26:00,240
Speaker 2: what's gonna happen is you're gonna call this number, like

1404
01:26:00,240 --> 01:26:01,519
Speaker 2: I'll just think of it in the moment, and then

1405
01:26:01,560 --> 01:26:06,360
Speaker 2: they'll go hello, and you'll go uh uh, fuck you,

1406
01:26:06,479 --> 01:26:08,240
Speaker 2: and then you'll hang up and you'll be like, ah,

1407
01:26:08,280 --> 01:26:09,400
Speaker 2: I should have planned something.

1408
01:26:09,760 --> 01:26:12,599
Speaker 4: I I think I think I would have. I think,

1409
01:26:12,960 --> 01:26:17,360
Speaker 4: honestly speaking about it, I would pretend that I was

1410
01:26:17,360 --> 01:26:18,799
Speaker 4: the restaurant they ordered from.

1411
01:26:19,200 --> 01:26:20,519
Speaker 2: Oh okay, I like where this is going.

1412
01:26:21,560 --> 01:26:24,160
Speaker 4: Like, hey, like say they ordered like a caramel frapp,

1413
01:26:24,760 --> 01:26:28,599
Speaker 4: Hey that carmel s frapp you gave or we gave you. Yeah,

1414
01:26:28,600 --> 01:26:31,280
Speaker 4: we actually put gorilla grew in it gorilla glue in

1415
01:26:31,320 --> 01:26:38,240
Speaker 4: it instead of like or like, hey, you forgot this,

1416
01:26:38,680 --> 01:26:41,040
Speaker 4: and then like make them go to the store and

1417
01:26:41,040 --> 01:26:42,960
Speaker 4: then ask like a fool. That would be funny.

1418
01:26:43,439 --> 01:26:45,679
Speaker 2: I like, okay, that's that's that's a pretty good one.

1419
01:26:46,600 --> 01:26:48,920
Speaker 2: The gorilla Ye see the gorilla blue one. If someone

1420
01:26:48,960 --> 01:26:51,600
Speaker 2: called me saying, hey, we put gorilla glue in your frappucino,

1421
01:26:51,640 --> 01:26:57,200
Speaker 2: I'd be like, I don't know what this is, but saying, oh, hey,

1422
01:26:57,840 --> 01:27:01,760
Speaker 2: you forgot something. That's a good one. Waste a little

1423
01:27:01,760 --> 01:27:04,960
Speaker 2: bit of their time, but not a fully egregious attack.

1424
01:27:06,320 --> 01:27:08,480
Speaker 4: Maybe, like I think it's a balanced.

1425
01:27:10,200 --> 01:27:13,000
Speaker 2: Right, right, you've got a credit card or it can't

1426
01:27:13,040 --> 01:27:14,720
Speaker 2: be there credit. It's got to be something because then

1427
01:27:14,720 --> 01:27:17,519
Speaker 2: they would check and their credit cards there or I

1428
01:27:17,560 --> 01:27:19,400
Speaker 2: don't know, but you're you know what you got. You

1429
01:27:19,520 --> 01:27:20,639
Speaker 2: got the gist of this down.

1430
01:27:22,600 --> 01:27:26,679
Speaker 4: It's kind of like guiding karma. That's like facilitating karma.

1431
01:27:27,600 --> 01:27:30,080
Speaker 2: Yes, you're a carmatic enforcement.

1432
01:27:31,760 --> 01:27:33,800
Speaker 4: Not to be like self righteous like that, Like I

1433
01:27:33,800 --> 01:27:40,320
Speaker 4: don't know can be righteous. But I got a bucket list, dude,

1434
01:27:42,720 --> 01:27:43,200
Speaker 4: what you're saying?

1435
01:27:43,280 --> 01:27:47,639
Speaker 2: It was Chris, Yeah, Chris, it's been. It's been fun

1436
01:27:47,720 --> 01:27:51,280
Speaker 2: ideating on your death with you and thinking of things

1437
01:27:51,280 --> 01:27:51,840
Speaker 2: that you can do.

1438
01:27:51,760 --> 01:27:52,400
Speaker 6: Before you die.

1439
01:27:55,040 --> 01:27:58,639
Speaker 4: Honestly, I watched One Piece and like a big thing

1440
01:27:58,720 --> 01:28:00,519
Speaker 4: is like with the will of d got to welcome

1441
01:28:00,600 --> 01:28:03,360
Speaker 4: death with a smile. I think I had I can

1442
01:28:03,520 --> 01:28:09,240
Speaker 4: do that. Yeah, but I've almost died before had I

1443
01:28:09,240 --> 01:28:09,759
Speaker 4: had a bomb?

1444
01:28:10,120 --> 01:28:12,920
Speaker 2: So I was doing it. Hhmm, how did you almost

1445
01:28:13,000 --> 01:28:13,559
Speaker 2: die before?

1446
01:28:15,000 --> 01:28:16,440
Speaker 4: You want it in fifteen seconds?

1447
01:28:16,800 --> 01:28:19,840
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'd love it in fifteen seconds, all right.

1448
01:28:19,880 --> 01:28:22,200
Speaker 4: So I was driving a four wheeler on a like

1449
01:28:22,320 --> 01:28:26,360
Speaker 4: gravelly road and they just built some windmills and theyre

1450
01:28:26,400 --> 01:28:28,080
Speaker 4: was a cliff that they built and I didn't know

1451
01:28:28,120 --> 01:28:29,719
Speaker 4: the cliff was there, and I was in like forty

1452
01:28:29,720 --> 01:28:31,479
Speaker 4: miles an hour and I went off the cliffs hit

1453
01:28:31,479 --> 01:28:34,160
Speaker 4: a rock and I was stuck under the four wheeler

1454
01:28:34,200 --> 01:28:34,719
Speaker 4: for like an hour.

1455
01:28:38,800 --> 01:28:44,760
Speaker 2: See, I just call a four wheeler a car. It's

1456
01:28:44,800 --> 01:28:47,680
Speaker 2: like to really use the term four wheeler.

1457
01:28:47,680 --> 01:28:50,520
Speaker 4: Like, you know, like a I think like a go cart,

1458
01:28:50,720 --> 01:28:53,160
Speaker 4: but bef oh.

1459
01:28:53,080 --> 01:28:53,759
Speaker 2: It's an ATV.

1460
01:28:55,479 --> 01:28:56,799
Speaker 4: Yeah.

1461
01:28:56,840 --> 01:28:59,640
Speaker 2: I like, maybe this isn't Maybe this isn't what you

1462
01:28:59,680 --> 01:29:01,240
Speaker 2: wanted me to get out of that story. But I

1463
01:29:01,280 --> 01:29:03,080
Speaker 2: really think that they should use a different term than

1464
01:29:03,120 --> 01:29:09,760
Speaker 2: four wheeler because there are a very broad range of

1465
01:29:10,479 --> 01:29:11,719
Speaker 2: vehicles that have four wheels.

1466
01:29:11,720 --> 01:29:16,720
Speaker 4: Four wheel has four wheels, oh yeah, yes, or like

1467
01:29:16,760 --> 01:29:20,080
Speaker 4: it feels like a go cart that has five wheels,

1468
01:29:20,120 --> 01:29:20,880
Speaker 4: the steering wheel.

1469
01:29:21,920 --> 01:29:23,840
Speaker 2: Okay, but my like my car, My car is a

1470
01:29:23,840 --> 01:29:24,479
Speaker 2: four wheeler.

1471
01:29:26,040 --> 01:29:28,280
Speaker 4: No, your cars are five. Your cars are six wheeler,

1472
01:29:28,320 --> 01:29:30,759
Speaker 4: has a spear in the trunk, has a steering wheel.

1473
01:29:32,840 --> 01:29:35,400
Speaker 2: You know what, I don't have a spare wheel. I

1474
01:29:35,400 --> 01:29:36,479
Speaker 2: don't have a spare wheel in the trunk, but I

1475
01:29:36,520 --> 01:29:38,000
Speaker 2: do have a steering wheel. So I guess you are right.

1476
01:29:38,080 --> 01:29:39,599
Speaker 2: But does the four wheel that you're talking about, does

1477
01:29:39,640 --> 01:29:40,439
Speaker 2: that have a steering wheel.

1478
01:29:42,000 --> 01:29:42,919
Speaker 4: No, it has a handlebar.

1479
01:29:45,640 --> 01:29:48,920
Speaker 2: I'll talk to you soon, Chris, take care.

1480
01:29:48,760 --> 01:29:57,400
Speaker 4: Of gek say say stay Gecky.

1481
01:29:55,439 --> 01:30:01,280
Speaker 2: On the line. I'm teaching you.

1482
01:30:01,479 --> 01:30:06,160
Speaker 1: Tells you life, but he's not really an expert.