Speaker 1: Hi, everyone, we have some exciting news to share. ABC
Speaker 1: News Studios has turned Caroline Borega's story from Betrayal season
Speaker 1: four into a docuseries. You'll get to meet the people involved,
Speaker 1: You'll hear from people who have never spoken before, and
Speaker 1: you get to see where this story took place. We
Speaker 1: are so proud and excited to share it with you all.
Speaker 1: Stream Betrayal Dirty Secrets now on Hulu or Hulu for
Speaker 1: Disney Plus.
Speaker 2: How in the world could someone stoop that low and
Speaker 2: go to that extreme? Were you too cowardly? Just tell
Speaker 2: me the truth.
Speaker 1: I'm Andrea Gunning and this is Betrayal, a show about
Speaker 1: the people we trust the most and the deceptions that
Speaker 1: change everything. A little while ago, a woman wrote into
Speaker 1: our show to share a story of betrayal. We're gonna
Speaker 1: call her Katie. She attached a voice memo to her email.
Speaker 1: Here's that voice memo.
Speaker 2: This is the story of a woman who couldn't give
Speaker 2: up on love.
Speaker 1: My mom has not been the luckiest in love. This
Speaker 1: is a story about my mom. After hearing this, we
Speaker 1: got on the phone with Katie and her mom, who
Speaker 1: were going to call Sydney. This is her story. Sydney
Speaker 1: grew up in the Midwest with her parents and brothers.
Speaker 1: From a young age. Her dad introduced the kids to
Speaker 1: a life of adventure.
Speaker 2: He was a private pilot, and I would go out
Speaker 2: to the airport with them and we would fly all over.
Speaker 1: Sydney, her brothers, and her mom would pack into her
Speaker 1: dad's tiny airplane and hold on tight as it lifted
Speaker 1: off into the sky. Sydney loved flying.
Speaker 2: It felt like you were far above everything. You were
Speaker 2: in the sky with all the clouds, and my father
Speaker 2: was in complete control, and so the trust I had
Speaker 2: was just beyond belief. I love looking down at the
Speaker 2: earth and all the glory that's down there, and you're
Speaker 2: just amazed.
Speaker 1: They were a work hard, play hard kind of family.
Speaker 1: After school and on weekends, Sydney worked at her family's restaurant.
Speaker 2: At fifty cents an hour.
Speaker 1: They served hamburgers and fries. The restaurant was painted white,
Speaker 1: with barstools lined up in a neat row.
Speaker 2: You had an awning where people pulled up in their
Speaker 2: cars and then some would go out and take their order.
Speaker 2: They would fix it, and then you'd go out and
Speaker 2: put a tray on their car.
Speaker 1: It was a picturesque childhood, but after graduating high school,
Speaker 1: Sydney's young adult life was marked by a lot of hardship.
Speaker 1: She married young and got pregnant with her first son,
Speaker 1: but her entrance into motherhood was immensely challenging. Her son
Speaker 1: was born with a terminal illness.
Speaker 2: I lost my son when he was two, and then
Speaker 2: I had gotten pregnant again and lost a stillborn.
Speaker 1: Sydney dealt with waves of overlapping grief after losing her children.
Speaker 1: It was an incredibly difficult time. In the years that followed,
Speaker 1: her marriage ended as well. When she was ready, Sydney
Speaker 1: had other relationships. She remarried and gave birth to her daughter, Katie,
Speaker 1: but that marriage also ended in divorce. After dealing with
Speaker 1: all shades of heartbreak, Sydney decided to stay single. She
Speaker 1: thought maybe a true deep romance just wasn't in the
Speaker 1: cards for her, and besides, her life had plenty of
Speaker 1: meaning and beauty without romantic love.
Speaker 2: I was very busy because I was traveling a lot.
Speaker 2: I had great friends. We would always do things together.
Speaker 2: Friendship to me is extremely important and I value it
Speaker 2: very highly.
Speaker 1: She also spent as much time as she could with
Speaker 1: her daughter, Katie.
Speaker 2: I have the most amazing daughter. We're very, very close.
Speaker 1: Katie's an adult now with a daughter of her own.
Speaker 2: My daughter and my granddaughter, or my whole life. I
Speaker 2: have the most amazing granddaughter. She's absolutely adorable and just
Speaker 2: as sweet as can be.
Speaker 1: Sidney retired, she began traveling more often to visit her
Speaker 1: daughter and granddaughter. One day, she was boarding a flight
Speaker 1: to visit them. She found her seat and got comfortable.
Speaker 2: I tend to read when I'm on a flight, and
Speaker 2: I started to take out a book.
Speaker 1: That's when the man sitting next to her struck up
Speaker 1: a conversation. He asked her what she was reading.
Speaker 2: He started talking to me, and I was immediately intrigued
Speaker 2: by his mannerism and his kindness.
Speaker 1: His name was Dan. As the flight went on, the
Speaker 1: two kept chatting.
Speaker 2: He spoke so sweetly, and our conversation was lighthearted and humorous.
Speaker 1: Before long, Sidney forgot about her book altogether.
Speaker 2: We talked about just a little bit of everything, and
Speaker 2: he just seemed so kind and so forthcoming. And as
Speaker 2: we got to landing, he asked if I would mind
Speaker 2: if I gave him my phone number, because he would
Speaker 2: like to stay in touch with me.
Speaker 1: Sydney gave him her number. She wasn't sure if she'd
Speaker 1: ever hear from him again. Maybe this was just a
Speaker 1: one time, serendipitous connection.
Speaker 2: But then he contacted me as soon as I got
Speaker 2: back home, and we talked several times on the phone.
Speaker 2: We would have these hour two hour long conversations that
Speaker 2: just flowed so easily.
Speaker 1: Dan shared that he was also divorced.
Speaker 2: He said that his wife had left him eighteen months prior.
Speaker 2: Then it got into more serious discussions about he had
Speaker 2: lost a grandchild and was going through that grieving process.
Speaker 2: I shared that I also had some tragedy in my
Speaker 2: life than that. Years ago. I had lost a child myself.
Speaker 1: The death of her children was not something she told
Speaker 1: many people about, but she felt safe opening up to Dan.
Speaker 2: I shared it because I wanted him to know that
Speaker 2: I understood exactly how he felt. I wasn't just saying
Speaker 2: that I understood. It was coming from the deepest part
Speaker 2: of my soul, in my heart that I do understand,
Speaker 2: and you can trust me with that.
Speaker 1: Dan held everything she shared with care. The parallels in
Speaker 1: their grief brought them closer together.
Speaker 2: All of a sudden, we felt this bond. We're sharing
Speaker 2: things that are the utmost deepest issues in our lives,
Speaker 2: and we're becoming very close within a very short period
Speaker 2: of time.
Speaker 1: When they met on the plane and he was preparing
Speaker 1: to move closer to her daughter and granddaughter, it turned
Speaker 1: out Dan lived in the area too, so once Sydney
Speaker 1: got settled into her new place, Dan called he wanted
Speaker 1: to come see her.
Speaker 2: He came to the condo that I was renting, and
Speaker 2: I remember opening the door and the look on his
Speaker 2: face was like, oh wow, I can't believe I'm actually
Speaker 2: standing in front of him. We're just not talking on
Speaker 2: the phone anymore. This is real.
Speaker 1: She welcomed him in the chemistry they had on the plane,
Speaker 1: came rushing back.
Speaker 2: We just talked and talked and talked, and then we
Speaker 2: went out to grab something to eat. And then he
Speaker 2: came back the next morning, and the same thing happened.
Speaker 1: The next two days were like an extended first date.
Speaker 2: He'd come over in the morning and we would spend
Speaker 2: the entire day together. We did a lot of out
Speaker 2: together and dinners together and walking in the park, and
Speaker 2: then he would leave that evening.
Speaker 1: And after their marathon date wrapped up, they immediately started
Speaker 1: planning the next one.
Speaker 2: We started seeing each other more and more and more.
Speaker 1: They were eager to learn everything they could about each other.
Speaker 1: Soon they knew the details, big and small, of each
Speaker 1: other's lives.
Speaker 2: He was an engineer, He was outgoing, He loved to laugh,
Speaker 2: he joked a lot. He was very gentle, very engaging.
Speaker 2: Would listen, I mean intently to everything I said and
Speaker 2: took it to heart and made me feel very, very wunted.
Speaker 1: Dan took Sidney completely by surprise. She had given up
Speaker 1: on finding a connection like this.
Speaker 2: I have to say that was a new feeling for me.
Speaker 1: It felt like life was giving her one more shot
Speaker 1: at love, one more shot at being truly happy with someone.
Speaker 1: But there were still challenges in their relationship. Dan was
Speaker 1: really struggling with the grief of losing his grandchild and
Speaker 1: decided to see a counselor for support.
Speaker 2: He was telling the counselor the hard time he was
Speaker 2: having getting past this event, and then he mentioned, however,
Speaker 2: I met someone and I'm really excited and I'd like
Speaker 2: to see where this goes. And the counselor said, well,
Speaker 2: wait a minute, you're in the middle of a grieving process.
Speaker 2: I don't think this is the best time for you
Speaker 2: to get involved with a new relationship. I believe you
Speaker 2: need to work through the steps of grieving before you
Speaker 2: decide to move on, so let's do that first and
Speaker 2: just put it on pause.
Speaker 1: It struck Sydney as an overstep from the counselor, but
Speaker 1: she knew that Dan was deeply affected by his grandchild's death.
Speaker 1: Maybe it was weighing on him more than she knew,
Speaker 1: so she was understanding.
Speaker 2: I told him the most important thing is for you
Speaker 2: to feel better and to get through this very difficult
Speaker 2: time in your life. So I will step aside.
Speaker 1: So Dan and Sydney decided to take a break.
Speaker 2: It was difficult. I missed him. We didn't talk at all.
Speaker 1: Sydney tried going on a first date with someone new,
Speaker 1: but it wasn't the same as it was with Dan.
Speaker 1: After a few weeks, Dan called her out of the.
Speaker 2: Blue and he said, I desperately need to talk to you.
Speaker 2: And I said, are you sure about that? I thought
Speaker 2: we weren't supposed to see each other, and he said,
Speaker 2: it's about that. I can't do it. I miss you
Speaker 2: too much much. I don't care what the counselor says
Speaker 2: I'm ready. I want to start seeing you again.
Speaker 1: The two picked up right where they left off.
Speaker 2: It was totally blissful. We just had the best time.
Speaker 2: It was just laughter and fun, and we got along
Speaker 2: so beautifully and never ever once had a disagreement or
Speaker 2: an argument or anything. It was just wonderful.
Speaker 1: The weeks turned two months, their relationship became deeper, more stable,
Speaker 1: and more committed.
Speaker 2: We were sitting in a restaurant over dinner and he
Speaker 2: just looked at me and said, I want to be
Speaker 2: together forever. I just believe that we were meant to
Speaker 2: be together. I had fallen very hard for him, and
Speaker 2: I remember being extremely happy.
Speaker 1: Sydney introduced Dan to her daughter, Katie.
Speaker 2: My daughter really liked him as well. And I remember
Speaker 2: I had to go into the hospital for some surgery
Speaker 2: and he came to the hospital and he sat with
Speaker 2: my daughter and they spent the time together waiting for
Speaker 2: me in the waiting room. They just really hit it
Speaker 2: off and she really liked him.
Speaker 1: As Sydney recovered from surgery, Dan was facing some health
Speaker 1: challenges of his own. He had high cholesterol and saw
Speaker 1: a cardiologist regularly. One day, he opened up to Sydney
Speaker 1: about his doctor's concerns.
Speaker 2: The doctor had found an irregular beat in his heart,
Speaker 2: but they didn't think it was anything drastic, and they
Speaker 2: said that he had had a little bit more plaque
Speaker 2: around his heart, but they would raise his medication and
Speaker 2: he should be fine.
Speaker 1: Dan didn't seem worried, so Sydney tried not to worry
Speaker 1: too much either. A week later, Dan made plans to
Speaker 1: visit his brother's.
Speaker 2: They were going to get together to discuss his mother's
Speaker 2: will before she passed away, so they wouldn't have to
Speaker 2: worry about anything.
Speaker 1: Dan would drive a few hours away to meet up
Speaker 1: with them and stay for the weekend. Before he headed out,
Speaker 1: he met Sydney for a lunch date.
Speaker 2: I wished him a great trip, and he said, I
Speaker 2: will call you every day, let you know everything goes.
Speaker 1: A few hours later, Sydney's phone rang.
Speaker 2: It was Dan. He had stopped for gas and he
Speaker 2: already missed me, and then he called me when he
Speaker 2: got down there.
Speaker 1: It was sweet to see how much Dan missed her.
Speaker 1: After only a few hours, Sydney went about her day
Speaker 1: as usual. At this point, Sydney and Dan had been
Speaker 1: talking every day for five months. He always texted or
Speaker 1: called her to SA good night. But on this night
Speaker 1: she didn't hear from him.
Speaker 2: I tried texting, he didn't answer. I tried calling, he
Speaker 2: didn't answer.
Speaker 1: Sydney went to sleep feeling anxious. When she woke up
Speaker 1: the next morning, Dan still hadn't reached out. She checked
Speaker 1: her phone all morning and afternoon, but still nothing.
Speaker 2: The last time I talked to him, he said he
Speaker 2: had arrived safely, and I thought, this is so strange.
Speaker 2: Why would he not contact me? And then I started
Speaker 2: worrying what happened. Something must have happened. Did he have
Speaker 2: an automobile accident? And you start making up stories?
Speaker 1: The whole weekend passed without any word from Dan. She
Speaker 1: started to wonder was this his way of breaking up
Speaker 1: with her.
Speaker 2: I've heard of people ending relationships kind of like that
Speaker 2: all of a sudden, but not him. I trusted him
Speaker 2: way too much.
Speaker 1: The silence went on for a week and a half.
Speaker 1: She didn't have any way of contacting his family. She
Speaker 1: just hoped that if something had happened to Dan, they
Speaker 1: would find a way to reach her.
Speaker 2: I was going out of my mind not knowing what happened.
Speaker 1: One afternoon, Sydney was getting ready to spend time with
Speaker 1: her daughter. When she heard her phone buzz, her heart leapt,
Speaker 1: hoping it might be Dan. Instead, it was a text
Speaker 1: from a number she didn't recognize. She started reading. It
Speaker 1: was Dan's brother. She'd never met him before, but he
Speaker 1: was writing with bad news.
Speaker 2: He said that he was so sorry to have to
Speaker 2: tell me this, but Dan had a heart attack and
Speaker 2: he passed away.
Speaker 1: Sidney's boyfriend, Dan, was on a trip with his brother's
Speaker 1: when he suddenly stopped texting and calling her back. Sydney
Speaker 1: didn't hear from him for days and was beginning to panic.
Speaker 1: Then she got a text from his.
Speaker 2: Brother saying that he was so sorry to have to
Speaker 2: tell me this, but Dan had a heart attack and
Speaker 2: he passed away.
Speaker 1: Dan's brother explained that it happened suddenly one night on
Speaker 1: their trip, when Dan was heading to bed. He said
Speaker 1: good night to his brother's and went upstairs.
Speaker 2: And that was the last that he heard until he
Speaker 2: heard a big crash upstairs where he fell, and when
Speaker 2: he ran upstairs, he called nine one one, tried to
Speaker 2: revive his brother and couldn't revive him, and by the
Speaker 2: time he got to the hospital, he passed on the way.
Speaker 1: He said that In the first few days following Dan's death,
Speaker 1: he hadn't been able to find Dan's phone. Without it,
Speaker 1: he didn't have Sydney's number, so he had no way
Speaker 1: to contact her. He felt horrible that it had taken
Speaker 1: so long to reach her.
Speaker 2: His brother said, I know how hard this has to
Speaker 2: be on you, Between my mother and his kids, everybody
Speaker 2: is just devastated. I'm sorry that we couldn't reach out
Speaker 2: to you as soon as it happened, but like I said,
Speaker 2: we couldn't find his phone.
Speaker 1: That's where his message ended. Sydney broke down.
Speaker 2: I was a mess. I was crying. I was out
Speaker 2: of my mind.
Speaker 1: Then her daughter, Katie showed up at her house. They
Speaker 1: were supposed to spend the afternoon together.
Speaker 2: She walked in and I just screamed. I told her
Speaker 2: what happened, and she dropped everything and just came to
Speaker 2: me and tried to comfort me the best she could.
Speaker 2: But she was upset too, because she really liked him.
Speaker 1: A heart attack. Sydney remembered Dan's cardiologist concerns, but she
Speaker 1: had no idea things were this serious.
Speaker 2: I was just devastated, absolutely devastated.
Speaker 1: The next few days were dark, especially when Sydney found
Speaker 1: out the family had already held a ceremony and buried Dan.
Speaker 1: The family plot. Kitty also reached out to Dan's brother,
Speaker 1: and he did his best to be there for her
Speaker 1: and Sydney as he dealt with his own grief.
Speaker 2: His brother responded to my daughter saying, I'm so sorry
Speaker 2: this has happened. And I know how much he loved
Speaker 2: your mother, and you told me knew how much he
Speaker 2: loved me, and he spoke about me all the time.
Speaker 1: Hearing Dan's brother talk about him in past tense made
Speaker 1: the reality sink in. Dan wasn't coming back.
Speaker 2: I didn't know what to do. I was just I
Speaker 2: was frantic.
Speaker 1: When Dan had been by her side, the world felt
Speaker 1: bright and full of possibility. Now everything felt heavy. She
Speaker 1: missed Dan's laugh, their long conversations, their shared hikes. Most
Speaker 1: of all, she just missed him.
Speaker 2: It was horrible. I'm not a person that gets depressed.
Speaker 2: I've never been depressed in my life, but I felt
Speaker 2: like I was going to get to that point.
Speaker 1: She turned over the details again and again.
Speaker 2: Things didn't add up in my brain. I kept thinking,
Speaker 2: how could this have happened? It doesn't make sense.
Speaker 1: But as time went on, she had to find acceptance.
Speaker 2: He's gone. It is what it is. I can't change it.
Speaker 1: For the first month after Dan's death, it was hard
Speaker 1: for Sidney to get out of bed. One day, one
Speaker 1: of Sydney's close friends, Peter, reached out to her. His
Speaker 1: whole family was going on a tropical vacation and he
Speaker 1: wanted her to come with them, and.
Speaker 2: He said, you need to get out of here, and
Speaker 2: maybe getting away would help mend my broken heart a
Speaker 2: little bit.
Speaker 1: Sidney decided to go on the trip. While the rest
Speaker 1: of the group went on excursions, Sydney stayed behind and
Speaker 1: laid by the pool by herself.
Speaker 2: I remember screaming up in the sky, going God, why
Speaker 2: did you do this? Please? I have to get past
Speaker 2: this and what do I do?
Speaker 1: It felt good to get some emotion out that week
Speaker 1: gave Sydney the space to begin to process Dan's death.
Speaker 1: Sydney wanted to try and visit Dan's grave early on.
Speaker 1: She asked his brother about it, but he gave her
Speaker 1: a complicated answer.
Speaker 2: He gave me this long explanation of it was in
Speaker 2: some family grave out in the forest, and there was
Speaker 2: a private gate to go through. It just sounded so strange.
Speaker 1: Talking to Dan's family was hard. It often left her
Speaker 1: with more questions than answers. Eventually she stopped reaching out.
Speaker 2: I decided that I would try and go on with
Speaker 2: my life, even though it was very hard.
Speaker 1: Sidney thought that with time, life without Dan would get easier.
Speaker 1: But a whole year went by, and as the seasons passed,
Speaker 1: Sidney was still struggling to move on. It was hard
Speaker 1: to find any closure with how suddenly Dan had died.
Speaker 1: She had never gotten to say goodbye. There was so
Speaker 1: much left unsaid. Her friend Peter told her about a
Speaker 1: strategy that helped him get through hard times in his
Speaker 1: own life.
Speaker 2: When things really get hard. Are you're facing something really difficult,
Speaker 2: throw it out to the universe, and the universe will
Speaker 2: somehow take care of you. And I always thought, yeah,
Speaker 2: write whatever.
Speaker 1: Sidney was skeptical, but Peter wasn't kidding. He suggested she
Speaker 1: write everything she wished she could say to Dan in
Speaker 1: a letter to him. It might help her process her
Speaker 1: feelings and maybe get some small sense of closure.
Speaker 2: I was having such a hard time getting past everything,
Speaker 2: so I thought, you know, what would it hurt? What
Speaker 2: would it hurt to do this? My thought? But how
Speaker 2: do I do it? And then I realized I still
Speaker 2: had his email address, so I thought, okay, I'm going
Speaker 2: to try this.
Speaker 1: So she grabbed her laptop and got set up at
Speaker 1: her kitchen counter, and then she began to write.
Speaker 2: Dan, I really still love you and I miss you.
Speaker 2: I know you are gone, but I just want you
Speaker 2: to know I love you. I will always love you.
Speaker 2: I will never forget you. My heart is broken, it
Speaker 2: will always be broken wherever you are in the universe.
Speaker 2: I hope you are well taken care of. I just
Speaker 2: hope that you're soul is happy, and just know that
Speaker 2: your heart will be with mine forever. After I composed
Speaker 2: it, it took me a minute to hit send, and I thought,
Speaker 2: is this really ridiculous? And I thought, no, I'm going
Speaker 2: to try it. And when I hit send, I just
Speaker 2: felt better. It was amazing. It felt like a huge
Speaker 2: brick was lifted from my body, Like wow, this really worked.
Speaker 1: She felt a sense of lightness, a closure she had
Speaker 1: been chasing for almost a year and a half. A
Speaker 1: few days later, Sydney was getting ready to go over
Speaker 1: to Katie's.
Speaker 2: House and I thought, oh, I'm going to check my
Speaker 2: emails before I go and all of a sudden, I
Speaker 2: see a response from Dan's email.
Speaker 1: Sydney did a double take.
Speaker 2: I'm like, wait a minute, I can't be reading this. Right,
Speaker 2: must be from his brother. So I opened it and
Speaker 2: I began reading and it was just complete sheer shock
Speaker 2: of horror. The very first line of this email said,
Speaker 2: Darling Sydney, I have sinned against God and you please
Speaker 2: forgive me. I am not dead.
Speaker 1: To help process her partner Dan's death, Sydney decided to
Speaker 1: put everything she wished she could tell him in an
Speaker 1: email as a final goodbye. She'd been dealing with this
Speaker 1: grief for almost a year and a half and was
Speaker 1: ready to move on. She wrote her message and hit send.
Speaker 1: She finally felt a sense of closure, but then a
Speaker 1: few days later, she was checking her email when she
Speaker 1: saw something impossible.
Speaker 2: Dan had responded, I'm like, wait a minute, I can't
Speaker 2: be reading this. Right must be from his brother. So
Speaker 2: I opened it and I began reading and it was
Speaker 2: just complete sheer shock of horror. The very first line
Speaker 2: of this email said, Darling Sydney, I have sinned against
Speaker 2: God and you please forgive me. I am not dead.
Speaker 2: And I just sat there and went this is a joke.
Speaker 2: This is literally a joke from somebody.
Speaker 1: But as she kept reading, it became horrifyingly clear he
Speaker 1: was very much alive, and he was writing with an explanation.
Speaker 2: It continued to say, I never got divorced. I am
Speaker 2: still married. I knew that you would never see me
Speaker 2: if you knew I was married.
Speaker 1: Not only had Dan's death been a lie, their life
Speaker 1: together had been a lie too. He had been married
Speaker 1: the entire time he was with Sydney.
Speaker 2: And the time that we spent together, his wife was
Speaker 2: back in the Midwest taking care of a mother that
Speaker 2: was very very ill.
Speaker 1: He'd been living a double life and he couldn't keep up. So,
Speaker 1: according to Dan's email, his brothers stepped in to suggest
Speaker 1: a plan to end his relationship with Sydney.
Speaker 2: None of this family wanted him to get divorced, and
Speaker 2: they said, well, we will come up with a plan.
Speaker 2: And the plan was to fake his death.
Speaker 1: Sydney stared at the email and shock. She couldn't comprehend
Speaker 1: the words fake and death together. She thought she might
Speaker 1: get sick.
Speaker 2: He said, I know you didn't deserve it, but that
Speaker 2: was the only way we knew how to end it
Speaker 2: with me.
Speaker 1: Sidney drove to her daughter's house in a daze.
Speaker 2: She looked at me and said, Mom, are you okay?
Speaker 2: And I said, you need to follow me in your
Speaker 2: bedroom because I have something to tell you. And I
Speaker 2: told her and she just couldn't believe it.
Speaker 1: Under the heartbreak and confusion, there was rage. Sydney felt
Speaker 1: deep blea manipulated.
Speaker 2: There's no words to express how horrible and deceived I felt.
Speaker 2: How in the world could someone stoop that low and
Speaker 2: go to that extreme? How could anyone treat anyone like that?
Speaker 1: And this wasn't just anyone. This was Dan, the man
Speaker 1: who made her believe in love again, the man just
Speaker 1: days ago she would have done anything to hear from again.
Speaker 1: Her head was spinning. During the year of her life
Speaker 1: she had spent grieving Dan's death and struggling to get
Speaker 1: out of bed. Sydney had to remind herself that there
Speaker 1: was nothing she could have done to prevent him from dying.
Speaker 1: But now she found out this had all been a choice,
Speaker 1: his choice. He let her suffer alone and let her
Speaker 1: grieve his death while he carried on living. And he
Speaker 1: did all of this knowing how much loss Sidney had
Speaker 1: already endured. In her lifetime.
Speaker 2: Death is horrible. It's the worst thing that can happen
Speaker 2: to a loved one. It sent me into despair and
Speaker 2: loneliness and unbelievable grief.
Speaker 1: The whole thing was horrific, but it was also ludicrous.
Speaker 1: It was so absurd that she found herself torn between
Speaker 1: crying and laughing.
Speaker 2: Now, all of a sudden, I find out he's risen
Speaker 2: from the dead. I mean, he couldn't just break up
Speaker 2: with me. He had to derive this plan that broke
Speaker 2: my heart into pieces.
Speaker 1: She sat with everything for a few days, letting the
Speaker 1: reality of the situation catch up with her.
Speaker 2: I just couldn't believe it. I was horrified, I was upset,
Speaker 2: I was angry, and I just cried.
Speaker 1: She thought of Dan's white and she felt horrible. She
Speaker 1: knew this must be painful for her too. Sydney kept
Speaker 1: rereading Dan's confession, not sure what to do next.
Speaker 2: Do I respond? What do I do?
Speaker 1: For three nights, Sydney lay in bed, unable to sleep.
Speaker 2: And finally I decided to reply.
Speaker 1: She began drapting her email, and everything she had been
Speaker 1: feeling came pouring out of her.
Speaker 2: Were you too cowardly? Just tell me the truth. You
Speaker 2: could have just told me the truth, and that wouldn't
Speaker 2: have hurt nearest bad. Do we even have the slightest
Speaker 2: idea of what your charade did to me and my daughter?
Speaker 2: Did you lie about everything you ever told me? I
Speaker 2: pray that you did not lie about losing your grandson.
Speaker 2: I wish I could say that I never met you,
Speaker 2: but that wouldn't have been accurate. I'm glad we met
Speaker 2: because I finally learned how much I was capable of
Speaker 2: loving so completely and unconditionally and selflessly. And for that,
Speaker 2: I'm going to thank you, and I ended it.
Speaker 1: In the months that followed, Sydney was plunged into a
Speaker 1: new type of grief. She no longer had to face
Speaker 1: Dan's death. She was now faced with the reality of
Speaker 1: Dan's life and how he'd chosen to spend it.
Speaker 2: It took me a very, very long time to get
Speaker 2: past the anger and the hurt. I had so many
Speaker 2: unanswered questions. I was still extremely hurt and tormented by
Speaker 2: what Dan had revealed and what he had done to me.
Speaker 2: So I decided one last time to reach out to Dan.
Speaker 1: She wrote him another email, asking for a full explanation
Speaker 1: of what he'd done.
Speaker 2: I was writing it for myself because I was still
Speaker 2: angry with myself for believing everything he told me and
Speaker 2: not analyzing it any better than I did.
Speaker 1: A few days later, Dan responded, and in his email,
Speaker 1: he revealed that his lies extended far beyond his death
Speaker 1: and his marriage.
Speaker 2: He explained that he wasn't who I thought he was.
Speaker 2: His real last name was different. He lived somewhere else
Speaker 2: other than where he told me he lived. His kids'
Speaker 2: names weren't what they told me they were. Everything he
Speaker 2: told me was a lie, except for the fact of
Speaker 2: how he felt. He was begging me to meet him
Speaker 2: so he could finally tell me the whole story and
Speaker 2: tell me the truth about everything he did and why
Speaker 2: he did it.
Speaker 1: Sydney agreed to meet him. A few days later, he
Speaker 1: knocked on her door, and when she saw Dan in person,
Speaker 1: she was overwhelmed. For over a year, she wanted nothing
Speaker 1: more than for him to miraculously reappear to talk to
Speaker 1: him one more time.
Speaker 2: All the grieving, and here he is. He's back.
Speaker 1: He said he was going to come clean and show
Speaker 1: her everything.
Speaker 2: He gave me a copy of his driver's license, copy
Speaker 2: of his passport to see what his real name was,
Speaker 2: who his kids really were.
Speaker 1: Then Dan pulled out a stack of business cards.
Speaker 2: He had a fake company, fake business cards, a fake name,
Speaker 2: fake email address, fake phone number. He traveled quite a
Speaker 2: bit and he would give those out to women that
Speaker 2: he met.
Speaker 1: Their airplane meet Cute had always felt so one of
Speaker 1: a kind. Now she saw it as part of Dan's pattern.
Speaker 1: He had lied to so many women, but Dan insisted
Speaker 1: with Sydney it was different. When they met, it was
Speaker 1: clear to him that what they shared was real. He
Speaker 1: knew he shouldn't have let their relationship get as serious
Speaker 1: as it did, but he couldn't help himself.
Speaker 2: He had fallen in love with me and didn't know
Speaker 2: how to get out of it. He couldn't apologize enough
Speaker 2: and professed his love and asked if I would consider
Speaker 2: taking him back.
Speaker 1: After all that, Dan admitted that he'd been a coward.
Speaker 1: He knew what he did was wrong. He had wanted
Speaker 1: to be with Sydney all along, he just couldn't find
Speaker 1: a way out of his marriage and his life. But
Speaker 1: now he was ready to risk everything to chase what
Speaker 1: he really wanted her.
Speaker 2: Then he takes out a divorce decree and it shows
Speaker 2: that he just filed for divorce. Filing for divorce was
Speaker 2: his way to prove to me that it was truly
Speaker 2: over this time. And started crying while he's telling me
Speaker 2: how much he loved me and so sorry for deceiving
Speaker 2: me and hurting me, and he just wasn't strong enough
Speaker 2: to confront what he needed to do.
Speaker 1: Dan laid everything out in front of her. He knew
Speaker 1: his honesty would cost him, but it was worth it
Speaker 1: to him if Sydney would consider giving him a second chance.
Speaker 2: I didn't know what to do. There were so many questions,
Speaker 2: but I still I loved him. I mean I never
Speaker 2: stopped loving him.
Speaker 1: It felt like a miracle that Dan was sitting in
Speaker 1: front of her at all. The thing she had mourned
Speaker 1: for the last year was now possible, a future with Dan,
Speaker 1: and now he wanted to start a new life with her.
Speaker 2: I wanted what we had again because I'd never had
Speaker 2: that before. I'd made so many mistakes in my lifetime
Speaker 2: with relationships, nothing ever worked out, and I thought, finally,
Speaker 2: finally it was going to be what I wanted.
Speaker 1: Dan left her house and Sidney was left to grapple
Speaker 1: with the strange situation. She found herself in a few
Speaker 1: weeks later.
Speaker 2: He showed up at my door with all his belongings
Speaker 2: and everything and said, the divorces going forward, and she's
Speaker 2: moved on. I've moved out of the house. Can I
Speaker 2: stay with you? And can we try this again? And
Speaker 2: low enfold. I took him back right away.
Speaker 1: That effortless joy Sydney always felt with Dan came flooding back.
Speaker 2: It was like a storybook. We couldn't spend enough time together.
Speaker 2: We started traveling together. We had hiked the Grand Canyon.
Speaker 2: It was amazing.
Speaker 1: Despite everything Dan had done, Sydney felt like they were
Speaker 1: on the other side. They had rebuilt the trust through
Speaker 1: dozens of hard and honest conversations. As unusual as their
Speaker 1: love story was. To Sydney, the relationship was stronger than ever.
Speaker 2: We were living together. He was going through his divorce.
Speaker 2: I knew when he was going to court. He didn't
Speaker 2: hide anything from me. We were finally open and honest
Speaker 2: and happy.
Speaker 1: In September, Dan and Sydney went on a trip to
Speaker 1: Dnali National Park in Alaska to go hiking. It was
Speaker 1: just a few weeks before Dan's divorce was set to
Speaker 1: be finalized, and they were looking forward to leaving that
Speaker 1: painful chapter of their relationship behind them.
Speaker 2: And three days before his divorce was due to be final,
Speaker 2: he came home from work and said he had just
Speaker 2: seen his lawyer and that he had canceled the divorce.
Speaker 1: They had just sat down for dinner together. Sydney stopped
Speaker 1: eating and stared at Dan, stunned.
Speaker 2: What do you mean you canceled the divorce and he said, well,
Speaker 2: she was going to take seventy five percent of his wealth.
Speaker 2: He proceeded to tell me, my money is too important.
Speaker 2: I can't lose everything I've worked for. So he informed
Speaker 2: me that he canceled the divorce and he was moving
Speaker 2: back home.
Speaker 1: Dan sat calmly at the dinner table, but to Sydney,
Speaker 1: it felt like the room was spinning.
Speaker 2: And I just sat there and I looked at him,
Speaker 2: and I just remember saying, you're doing this to me again.
Speaker 2: I screamed, and I said get out, and he said, well,
Speaker 2: I'll make sure i'm out in the morning. I said, no,
Speaker 2: you won't. You will make sure you are out now.
Speaker 2: I never ever want to see you hear from you
Speaker 2: repeat your name again.
Speaker 1: Dan stood up and began collecting his things.
Speaker 2: And he stopped and said, this isn't what I want.
Speaker 2: And I remember just laughing in his face, going I
Speaker 2: don't care what you want, this is what I want,
Speaker 2: and you are leaving now.
Speaker 1: Dan walked out the door and Sydney closed it behind him.
Speaker 1: She would never open the door to him again.
Speaker 2: I've spent the past four years getting past what happened.
Speaker 2: I dated, I had relationships, nothing ever worked out.
Speaker 1: But as her daughter said in her voice memo to us,
Speaker 1: this is a story about a woman who couldn't give
Speaker 1: up on love.
Speaker 2: Remember my friend. I told you about my very very
Speaker 2: special friend.
Speaker 1: Peter, the friend who encouraged Sydney to throw how she
Speaker 1: was feeling out to the universe.
Speaker 2: Well, we're together. We're actually engaged. He's absolutely amazing. I'm
Speaker 2: very happy and I couldn't ask for anything more. There's
Speaker 2: a bright light after this horrible story. That's him. So
Speaker 2: he threw it out to the universe.
Speaker 1: Maybe he was right about that strategy.
Speaker 2: After all, my life finally turned around. Sometimes you have
Speaker 2: to go through really bad things to really then appreciate
Speaker 2: the best. And I have the best right now.
Speaker 1: Sydney endured so much pain in her relationship with Dan,
Speaker 1: but there was something she gained from the experience that
Speaker 1: Dan can never take away.
Speaker 2: I learned how to love and I had never learned
Speaker 2: that before. In your darkest moments, it's amazing how strong
Speaker 2: you can become.
Speaker 1: We end every weekly episode with the same question, why
Speaker 1: do you want to share your story?
Speaker 2: I was angry at myself for a long time, and
Speaker 2: I kept thinking, how could I have fallen for this,
Speaker 2: not once but twice? Why did it happen to me?
Speaker 2: And the only answer I had was that I fell
Speaker 2: in love with him. I just wanted to believe. I
Speaker 2: wanted to trust. None of us are stupid. We're all
Speaker 2: smart people, and we got to quit telling ourselves were
Speaker 2: not when things like this happen. All I did was
Speaker 2: want to love someone.
Speaker 1: On the next episode of Betrayal Weekly.
Speaker 3: I don't know these person. What I had in my
Speaker 3: mind is not true. He's not the person I thought
Speaker 3: he was. I have no idea what he was capable
Speaker 3: of doing.
Speaker 1: If you'd like to share your story on Betrayal, please
Speaker 1: email Betrayalpod at gmail dot com. That is Betrayalpod at
Speaker 1: gmail dot com. Please note that we are not a
Speaker 1: mental health organization. If you are in crisis, or currently
Speaker 1: experiencing domestic violence. We encourage you to seek local help
Speaker 1: or dial nine to one one. Please contact organizations that
Speaker 1: offer immediate support. In our show notes, we've included a
Speaker 1: list of US based resources. You can follow us on
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Speaker 1: Glass Podcasts, a division of Glass Entertainment Group, in partnership
Speaker 1: with iHeart Podcasts. The show is executive produced by Nancy
Speaker 1: Glass and Jennifer Fason, hosted and produced by me Andrea Gunning,
Speaker 1: written and produced by Olivia Hewitt. Our story editor is
Speaker 1: Monique Lebord, also produced by Ben Fetterman. Our associate producer
Speaker 1: is Leah Jablow. Production management by Kristin Melcurie, Booking support
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