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Speaker 1: The video cameras are on. Right have they been on?

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Speaker 1: How long have they been on?

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Speaker 2: Eleven seconds?

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Speaker 1: Okay? All right, So we didn't get when Martha tried.

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Speaker 2: To hit me earlier.

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Speaker 1: I didn't get that, sorry.

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Speaker 3: Okay, because I made a pretty innocuous comment, so something

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Speaker 3: I would characterize as a little joke. And she took

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Speaker 3: a huge swing backhand at me and tried to hit me.

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Speaker 3: Luckily she she actually just grazed my jacket. And then

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Speaker 3: later she grabbed her drink off the table and said,

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Speaker 3: I can't have this here. I won't be able to

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Speaker 3: go back and forth. And I said, short arms. You

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Speaker 3: have short arms, which I know because you were unable

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Speaker 3: to hit me from where you're sitting so far, and

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Speaker 3: you needed the drink. And then she looked at me

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Speaker 3: again like she wanted to murder me.

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Speaker 2: And I'm drinking back.

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Speaker 4: All the conversations we had about like, hey, we're thinking

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Speaker 4: about having Martha back on, Like do you think that's

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Speaker 4: a good idea. Do you think she's and everyone control herself?

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Speaker 4: Do you just you just have to be prepared. She's

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Speaker 4: going to take a huge swing. And I thought them

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Speaker 4: in performance wise, which is first i've seen her do

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Speaker 4: literally everything I've ever seen her in.

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Speaker 3: Well, yes, every time I see her on camera or person,

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Speaker 3: she's always like swinging wild you.

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Speaker 2: Can feel yeah, absolutely yeah.

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Speaker 1: And not you know, not all those swings land.

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Speaker 3: But I think as a as a performer in.

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Speaker 1: I think like I want that, I want someone so bold,

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Speaker 1: But I didn't.

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Speaker 2: Really I want it.

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Speaker 4: I want it when it works, which it it it has,

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Speaker 4: it has, it has it has.

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Speaker 3: But I go, oh, I think I want my artists

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Speaker 3: to be like unhinged, which Martha is, and just like

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Speaker 3: totally fucking bononcos. But then when you actually have to

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Speaker 3: sit on a couch with them, watch out, because it

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Speaker 3: doesn't it doesn't stop when the camera's off right before

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Speaker 3: the camera turns.

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Speaker 1: And she must have known. She must have checked for

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Speaker 1: the lights.

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Speaker 3: Before she took the swing, because it was like it

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Speaker 3: was eleven seconds before you know, we started.

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Speaker 5: I turned the camera off and then I swung at you.

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Speaker 4: Okay, so that that would be well, you must have

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Speaker 4: had to get really close to the camera.

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Speaker 1: I'm just so.

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Speaker 3: Fucking short, got these little t rex stumps coming off

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Speaker 3: the shoulders here and it's just like.

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Speaker 1: And by the way, I don't care, I mean here

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Speaker 1: we go again, we're talking about our.

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Speaker 3: Female guests bodies, you know, like it's everyone's just like

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Speaker 3: up our ass about everything these days. And it's like, yeah, well,

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Speaker 3: you know in a way she brought it up first,

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Speaker 3: said she couldn't reach her soda.

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Speaker 4: And that's also like those are the bodies that like,

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Speaker 4: I'm looking at more. Yeah, bodies, No, I just like

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Speaker 4: women's body. People don't understand this. When they did, it

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Speaker 4: makes sense really like do you have.

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Speaker 1: A comments on women's bodies? It's like, well, that's what

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Speaker 1: I'm looking at.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, that makes sense.

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Speaker 4: When it's like a people like I guess they're forgetting

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Speaker 4: I'm working with the same thing.

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Speaker 5: Basically, do you And because I know I trust you guys,

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Speaker 5: because you do mostly look at female bodies. If hypothetically

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Speaker 5: I was going to try to hop back into the

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Speaker 5: dating game and go on the apps, should I not

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Speaker 5: mention my t rex arms or is that considered catfish?

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Speaker 3: I think it's I'll make this even clearer, it's not.

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Speaker 1: It's not necessarily catfishing. But what I'll say is it's

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Speaker 1: so pronounced that.

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Speaker 3: What you're gonna want to aim for as someone for

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Speaker 3: whom that is a fetish and you'll both be really happy, Okay,

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Speaker 3: because it's like, it's not like your arms are a

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Speaker 3: little short.

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Speaker 5: Right, No, they're not a little they're insane.

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Speaker 4: The game has changed, Martha, and I can tell you

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Speaker 4: there's a whole stubby chaser community. There's a lot of

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Speaker 4: people out there. There's someone out there for everyone, and

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Speaker 4: you are someone's someone.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, you're someone's ideal.

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Speaker 4: It's like, and let's talk about how to get you

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Speaker 4: out there, how to get you really in front of

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Speaker 4: some fellas.

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Speaker 5: Do you now do you think that I should do that? What?

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Speaker 2: Sorry?

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Speaker 4: What did you not understand about me? Say, let's talk

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Speaker 4: about something else like this. I'm trying to redirect the conversation.

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Speaker 4: We just don't if you could just not like kind

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Speaker 4: of come for me today, Like we really do not

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Speaker 4: have much time, okay.

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Speaker 1: We are in a hurry to get the episode done.

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Speaker 5: We have, yes, they do, say.

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Speaker 2: So this is what I've learned.

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Speaker 4: I kind of thought it was in June, but it

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Speaker 4: is actually not this Sunday but the one after. And

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Speaker 4: I'm thinking, like, okay, that seems pretty far away, but

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Speaker 4: like by the time we get to like next Thursday,

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Speaker 4: I feel like it is going to be too late

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Speaker 4: to plan the entire halftime show.

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Speaker 2: But we have to do.

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Speaker 4: We've done a bunch of episodes about it, but we

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Speaker 4: haven't sealed the deal.

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Speaker 5: Do you think if I make the cut and get

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Speaker 5: to be in the halftime?

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Speaker 2: To you, it has to be you believe me. I

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Speaker 2: don't like any more than you do. No.

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Speaker 3: I wish we had more time, because we've cycled through

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Speaker 3: some options that looking back, we maybe shouldn't have moved

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Speaker 3: off of so quickly.

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Speaker 1: Bill Hines had some pretty good materials.

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Speaker 4: Oh my god, if I could have Bill Hines back

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Speaker 4: in here right now.

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Speaker 3: But he's got his own stuff going on, and we've

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Speaker 3: got you and we are going to make some lemonade,

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Speaker 3: right Okay?

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Speaker 5: Well, coach coach me, But also, can you introduce me

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Speaker 5: to Taylor Swift at the football game?

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Speaker 3: Well, she's in the market for a new best friend.

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Speaker 3: I've seen some reports she's distancing herself from her bestie Blake.

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Speaker 5: Really in Blake's time of falling from Grace, Taylor's really

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Speaker 5: Is that true?

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Speaker 1: And Blake's time of falling from Grace, I don't know.

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Speaker 3: I don't have a better way to say it. I

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Speaker 3: don't have I was ready to come at you. I

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Speaker 3: was gonna say, hey, if we talk about this on.

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Speaker 1: Stage during the show, let's like really nail down the phrasing.

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Speaker 4: But it's like democracy, it's it doesn't work, but it's

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Speaker 4: better than anything else we got, you know.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah, so far we'll see. I mean, we might

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Speaker 5: like authoritarianism.

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Speaker 4: We've never tried to and that thank you for bringing

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Speaker 4: this up so I can say, please stop talking about this,

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Speaker 4: because you have come on the show multiple times from

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Speaker 4: during the two administrations ago.

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Speaker 2: And talked about killing the president.

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Speaker 4: We cannot have this and I need you to get

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Speaker 4: on record right now and say that you are not

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Speaker 4: going to do that the episode and as part of

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Speaker 4: the show when you do the halftime show, you will

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Speaker 4: not do that.

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Speaker 5: Please, I will not ever unless it's self defense.

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Speaker 4: You know that's gonna that might come up, Martha, and

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Speaker 4: you just have to let it happen.

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Speaker 1: Because that is a little bit unpredicted.

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Speaker 2: You have to let him kill.

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Speaker 5: You if he comes at me. Yes, I will defend

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Speaker 5: myself up to and including murdering and self defense, which

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Speaker 5: is not murder.

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Speaker 3: You're not gonna be.

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Speaker 1: Able to reach the don't murdering itself like those long arms.

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Speaker 5: You know, well, I they don't call me t Rux

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Speaker 5: only because of my arm.

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Speaker 2: That's right.

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Speaker 1: Oh wow, that's right.

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Speaker 5: There's some teeth happening, and there's.

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Speaker 1: The fucking pee brain. I need another one down in

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Speaker 1: your tail.

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Speaker 3: Get the message across, do not kill this guy.

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Speaker 2: You have to let him kill you, Martha and.

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Speaker 1: Better people than you have tried.

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Speaker 4: Okay, and even if you are gonna defend yourself, can

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Speaker 4: you just say now that you're gonna let him kill you?

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Speaker 2: Please?

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Speaker 5: Here's what I will say for the show. Here's what

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Speaker 5: I'll say. I will play dud and I am sure

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Speaker 5: it will fool him the same way it would a bear.

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Speaker 5: So if he tries to kill me, I will play dud.

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Speaker 4: Okay, Well, he's gonna sniff you pretty hard, so like,

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Speaker 4: how are you.

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Speaker 5: When he leans down to sniff me, I'm gonna jab

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Speaker 5: him in his eyes with my t rex clop. But

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Speaker 5: that isn't gonna kill him. It will blind him and

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Speaker 5: I'll get up and run away.

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Speaker 2: All right, you have to do the show.

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Speaker 4: I mean, like, it's not much good does of our

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Speaker 4: halftime halftime show?

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Speaker 3: Centerpiece is running away and I am holding out hope

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Speaker 3: that we get some other Wait, is he.

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Speaker 5: Gonna be at table at the game? I don't know that.

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Speaker 2: She's probably gonna be at the game.

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Speaker 4: And there the Taylor Swift as well as there, like

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Speaker 4: as a football fan, is not there to like be

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Speaker 4: like making friends with you. They're there to just watch

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Speaker 4: the game. Okay, So if you could not force your

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Speaker 4: friendship on any of any of the VIPs, if you

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Speaker 4: could let the VIPs kill you if.

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Speaker 3: They want to, if Taylor Swift wants to kill you, yeah,

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Speaker 3: we have to let that go through.

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Speaker 5: I am a big fan of her music, so I

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Speaker 5: for sure would not kill her.

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Speaker 1: And Solf, what's your favorite song of hers?

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Speaker 5: One of my favorite songs is called Marjorie.

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Speaker 3: Don't we don't do this on stage like when you

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Speaker 3: see you.

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Speaker 1: Go Taylor's here.

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Speaker 3: I think the show should be mostly crowd work, just

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Speaker 3: because material wise, were we.

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Speaker 2: Might need a little of everything.

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Speaker 4: So like by the time we're done with like the

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Speaker 4: dancing portion, like we're on to crowd work.

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Speaker 5: So like, people, so am I dancing or you mean

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Speaker 5: there's gonna be dancing dancing?

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Speaker 4: No, you're dancing for it just a minute, like not

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Speaker 4: don't make the whole thing dancing, please, but like we

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Speaker 4: you know, still dancing and then we're on on the

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Speaker 4: next thing.

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Speaker 5: I did try out for drill team freshman year of

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Speaker 5: high school, so okay, didn't didn't make it. Okay, that

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Speaker 5: was the first year that they decided not to allow

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Speaker 5: everyone who auditioned to get on it, which is not fair.

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Speaker 5: But you that made it, No, but it was most

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Speaker 5: most everybody. I was in their defense. I was not good, yeah,

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Speaker 5: but I did. But they but if they had accepted

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Speaker 5: me onto the team and I could have practiced with

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Speaker 5: the team, I could have gotten a little better. Still,

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Speaker 5: maybe not good. But anyway, what do we tried out

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Speaker 5: for drill team?

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Speaker 2: Okay, they really put me in a pickle?

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Speaker 3: You use that, well, we're gonna have to use that.

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Speaker 2: I mean that we really don't have much time to

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Speaker 2: use first.

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Speaker 3: It's like a Gallagher thing where you go, guys, I

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Speaker 3: try out for drill team in high school, and then

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Speaker 3: you take out a board and you start drilling.

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Speaker 2: Drilling holes in it.

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Speaker 4: But in this case, I think you will have to

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Speaker 4: be drilling a pickle because we have to like move.

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Speaker 4: So you put the pickle on the end of the

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Speaker 4: power drill and it's like kind of spinning around.

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Speaker 5: So then I say I tried a team. Yeah, yeah,

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Speaker 5: I tried out for Dill team Yeah, and it really

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Speaker 5: put me in a pickle. And then I bring it.

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Speaker 5: I pull out the drill. Yeah, it has a pickle

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Speaker 5: on it.

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Speaker 4: It has a pickle on it's spinning around really fast,

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Speaker 4: and it probably flying off. To be honest, I mean,

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Speaker 4: we don't have time to like see if it works.

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Speaker 4: And so my guess is this thing is gonna go

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Speaker 4: flying off and maybe kill the president.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, okay, that's not my fault if that happens.

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Speaker 3: Yes, it will be because this is all you've brought

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Speaker 3: to us in terms of ideas for what to do

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Speaker 3: on stage, and it's very, very dangerous. The other thing

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Speaker 3: was to do crowd work with Taylor Swift. You're making

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Speaker 3: up song names. You're saying one of my favorites.

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Speaker 1: What you do is you go my favorite song, You

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Speaker 1: go Taylor, I see Taylor's here. My favorite song is

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Speaker 1: twenty two. That's how old I am. Please say that

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Speaker 1: you're twenty two for.

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Speaker 5: This, for this show or for the halftime show, for

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Speaker 5: the halftime show, Okay, this would be nice. I do

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Speaker 5: like the song twenty two perfect.

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Speaker 1: It's your favorite.

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Speaker 2: How's it go? How's that part go?

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Speaker 5: I don't know about you, but I'm feeling twenty two.

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Speaker 4: Okay, it should go. I don't know about you, but

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Speaker 4: I'm definitely twenty two when you sing it.

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Speaker 2: That's what That's what it has to be.

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Speaker 5: What if I don't even farther back and I go,

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Speaker 5: I don't know about you, but I'm about to turn

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Speaker 5: I'm not even twenty two.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, that's really good. Turn twenty two. I'm twenty one here. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: I'm twenty one and a half.

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Speaker 6: Yeah, I'm twenty one and three quarters.

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Speaker 3: My birthdays in like July.

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Speaker 4: I don't think that's three quarters, but again, it has

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Speaker 4: to be. It has to be three quarters.

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Speaker 5: Well, okay, so we've got this.

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Speaker 2: Okay, go ahead, let's stay.

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Speaker 4: We don't have that much time, but let's let's hear

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Speaker 4: the case for why why birthday?

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Speaker 1: I think it's good.

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Speaker 3: I think it's good to a get the math wrong

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Speaker 3: and B to say three quarters, but you are rounding

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Speaker 3: up because it's really and a half.

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Speaker 4: It'll be really distracting because if someone said they were

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Speaker 4: twenty one to three quarters and their birthday.

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Speaker 2: Was exactly six months away.

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Speaker 4: Yes, I don't think I'd be able to hear whatever

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Speaker 4: song or show was happening for the next five minutes

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Speaker 4: about that.

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Speaker 3: It's so in this specific case that might benefit us

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Speaker 3: that that becomes the big headline after the show is

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Speaker 3: that the the the performing act right HM was unable

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Speaker 3: to even do the bath and even the camera, even

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Speaker 3: the camera guys and the directors in the truck that

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Speaker 3: are supposed to be following the show are so distracted

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Speaker 3: by that that you just move out of frame and

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Speaker 3: the camera's not even moving.

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Speaker 2: They aren't switching gagles or anything.

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Speaker 4: Everyone is thinking about why you said what at three quarters?

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Speaker 3: It be like April's going to be like April.

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Speaker 5: So okay, okay, So we've got for the set list,

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Speaker 5: We've got I try out for Dill Team.

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Speaker 2: Let's start from the beginning. Let's start from the beginning.

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Speaker 3: The President come at me, Martha, Let's I try out

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Speaker 3: for Dill Team.

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Speaker 2: But I need to start at the beginning. You have to.

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Speaker 4: Lots of people think that Kendrick Lamar is going to

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Speaker 4: be doing the halftime show. That is not what we said.

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Speaker 4: First off, we said that Lamar was doing the halftime

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Speaker 4: show Spanish for the mar which is your stage name.

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Speaker 4: We have told people say it's me.

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Speaker 5: Lamar Lamar, and then can I also say fun fact

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Speaker 5: because people like fun facts?

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Speaker 2: Kendrick Lamar, Who's what of this are you saying?

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Speaker 4: Can you just like be clear about like are you

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Speaker 4: saying because people like fun facts?

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Speaker 5: I'm gonna say fun fact and then I'm gonna turn

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Speaker 5: to the crowd and I know you guys love fun facts, Okay,

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Speaker 5: Kendrick Lamar.

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Speaker 2: Nice?

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Speaker 5: Kendrick Lamar who is not here? Did a remix version

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Speaker 5: of Taylor's song bad Blood. Kendrick Lamar was on it

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Speaker 5: and Taylor is here. Hi, Taylor. I'm twenty one and

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Speaker 5: three quarters my birthdays in July. My birthdays in July,

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Speaker 5: and I would love it if you came and you

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Speaker 5: don't have to perform.

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Speaker 2: Where is you have to say? Like where is it?

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Speaker 5: Like, what's the where is my birthday party?

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Speaker 2: Oh?

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Speaker 3: My birthday's on the fourth of July. God bless America birthday,

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Speaker 3: mister president. With your attendance today, and then.

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Speaker 5: I do a bottle rocket that accidentally hits him and

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Speaker 5: kills him.

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Speaker 3: Well, it's not accidental of you just to announce you're

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Speaker 3: gonna do it.

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Speaker 5: Well, I mean it's a dangerous firework, so you never know.

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Speaker 4: And is that gonna be like that has a pickle

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Speaker 4: on the end of it too, if you've attached a

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Speaker 4: pickle to the end of a bottle rocket?

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Speaker 5: What if I came out with those tiny pickles on

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Speaker 5: the ends of each of my fingers?

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Speaker 1: Cornish?

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Speaker 5: Is that what you call them?

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Speaker 1: Well, cornishans is what I'm thinking of. Beau also an example.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I call them corny shans.

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Speaker 1: Wow, okay, enjoy the rest of the episode.

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Speaker 7: I'm actually please give me some please give me some

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Speaker 7: grace in this, Like I I am so scared and

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Speaker 7: upset about like where all this is going.

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Speaker 1: I call them annoying hate.

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Speaker 4: I am so sorry. That's not anything. That's not that's

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Speaker 4: not that's just what I call those pickles. That's not

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Speaker 4: derived Cornish is exactly what it sounds like saying again,

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Speaker 4: that's exactly what it sounds like what I'm thinking. And

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Speaker 4: you don't even know what I was saying, Like I

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Speaker 4: could have just been pronouncing the normal way.

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Speaker 3: You didn't even know the fucking word stupids is it's

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Speaker 3: a different thing.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, it is, it is. It is. It's what she

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Speaker 2: was doing.

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Speaker 4: It not that I didn't know what she was talking about. Now,

358
00:17:21,760 --> 00:17:24,040
Speaker 4: look like you know what the fuck? Like Eddie of

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Speaker 4: us know what she's talking about.

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Speaker 1: It's the closest I've ever come. Which one were you

361
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Speaker 1: talking about? What did you mean?

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Speaker 5: Okay?

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00:17:31,920 --> 00:17:32,720
Speaker 2: Like she knows?

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00:17:33,600 --> 00:17:37,480
Speaker 5: Don't project your anger at Hayes onto me.

365
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Speaker 1: Who's I'm not see what I'm saying.

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Speaker 6: She doesn't know the deflecting.

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Speaker 3: So I think it should be mostly crowd work. I

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Speaker 3: think it should be Matt Rife style.

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Speaker 1: Interested in getting.

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Speaker 2: A whole new jaw.

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Speaker 5: Okay, let me let me and it.

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Speaker 2: Goes on top. It's not replacing the original ones.

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Speaker 3: Like an extra job, brand new job.

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Speaker 5: I'm gonna get. I'm gonna get an a prosthetic addition

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Speaker 5: to my nose as well. Not for any acting job,

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00:18:15,880 --> 00:18:20,399
Speaker 5: but just to just to accentuate my nose. I've been

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Speaker 5: thinking about it. Okay, Okay, let me try some Matt

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00:18:24,240 --> 00:18:30,520
Speaker 5: Rife crowd work on you. Hey about you guys are

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00:18:30,560 --> 00:18:33,959
Speaker 5: all thinking like, wow, how can somebody that good looking

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00:18:34,040 --> 00:18:37,560
Speaker 5: be funny? How's that?

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Speaker 2: Okay?

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00:18:40,800 --> 00:18:41,200
Speaker 4: Uh?

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Speaker 2: I love it? I mean I think.

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Speaker 6: I think I like it when he does it.

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Speaker 4: I'm struggling with the crowd aspect. I'm trying as as

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Speaker 4: the crowd in this case, I'm trying to well, I'm

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00:19:04,320 --> 00:19:07,920
Speaker 4: being told what I'm thinking purchasing this. I bet you

388
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Speaker 4: guys are thinking this. Yeah, that's right, that's me, you guys,

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Speaker 4: that was me.

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00:19:12,400 --> 00:19:14,040
Speaker 2: You're talking directly, guys.

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Speaker 5: Let me revise it because I can see that I

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Speaker 5: hit a nerve.

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Speaker 4: Okay, okay, I was getting there, but sure, go ahead,

394
00:19:22,240 --> 00:19:24,479
Speaker 4: like I was really close. But if you want to

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Speaker 4: just start over.

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00:19:26,640 --> 00:19:29,480
Speaker 5: Do you want to finish your your No?

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Speaker 2: At this point, there's absolutely no way. It's like that.

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Speaker 2: That's Scott ruined. That's done. That is that? That that's ashes.

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Speaker 5: Okay, okay, here's the second draft of Matt Matt Rife. Hey,

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00:19:48,840 --> 00:19:53,360
Speaker 5: thanks for thanks for having me at the super I'm sorry, okay,

401
00:19:53,520 --> 00:19:56,320
Speaker 5: thanks you. Yeah, I heard my I hurt my t

402
00:19:56,520 --> 00:19:57,119
Speaker 5: rex claw.

403
00:19:57,240 --> 00:20:01,200
Speaker 4: You want to show how long they are, but like bite,

404
00:20:01,320 --> 00:20:04,560
Speaker 4: just like hitting headphones and stuff like you.

405
00:20:04,520 --> 00:20:06,760
Speaker 2: Didn't used to do. I don't remember you doing that before.

406
00:20:07,040 --> 00:20:07,720
Speaker 2: One thing, like.

407
00:20:07,680 --> 00:20:10,920
Speaker 4: Every time you come in here, you're headphones and things

408
00:20:10,920 --> 00:20:11,240
Speaker 4: like that.

409
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Speaker 5: But I have to be honest.

410
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Speaker 2: This place.

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00:20:16,760 --> 00:20:19,240
Speaker 1: You can sue this place for injury.

412
00:20:19,400 --> 00:20:21,160
Speaker 5: Okay, I did hurt my finger on.

413
00:20:21,119 --> 00:20:23,480
Speaker 6: The hotdphone place for injury?

414
00:20:23,640 --> 00:20:26,040
Speaker 5: Can I sue this place for I'm gonna sue this

415
00:20:26,080 --> 00:20:27,040
Speaker 5: place for injury?

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00:20:27,440 --> 00:20:33,280
Speaker 6: Fucking sentences being constructed today. I'm just done.

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00:20:33,440 --> 00:20:35,600
Speaker 1: I'm so can I can?

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00:20:35,640 --> 00:20:36,440
Speaker 5: I can?

419
00:20:36,480 --> 00:20:39,639
Speaker 1: I try my plan to try my Matt right, floor

420
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Speaker 1: is yours?

421
00:20:40,400 --> 00:20:43,560
Speaker 5: Okay, Hey, as I'm excited to be here at the

422
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Speaker 5: super Bowl.

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Speaker 1: You know, you take the couch. I'll be on the

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Speaker 1: floor for the rest of the fucking episode.

425
00:20:48,400 --> 00:20:50,600
Speaker 6: Just lying down thinking about what went wrong in my

426
00:20:50,640 --> 00:20:51,440
Speaker 6: life is.

427
00:20:51,280 --> 00:20:53,080
Speaker 2: One of the worst episodes we've ever did.

428
00:20:53,720 --> 00:21:02,400
Speaker 4: Okay, go ahead, please go quick. I'm like, I put

429
00:21:02,400 --> 00:21:05,280
Speaker 4: myself in the audience. I'm getting really pissed off, and

430
00:21:05,320 --> 00:21:07,959
Speaker 4: that's scaring me because like I'm the one who's supposed

431
00:21:07,960 --> 00:21:08,800
Speaker 4: to be taking care.

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00:21:08,640 --> 00:21:11,200
Speaker 2: Of me the audience. Okay, I'm a good show. Now

433
00:21:11,240 --> 00:21:12,000
Speaker 2: I'm in trouble.

434
00:21:12,600 --> 00:21:19,000
Speaker 5: I just is all of this part of the framework?

435
00:21:19,040 --> 00:21:22,800
Speaker 5: Where is this part of Is this it you're breaking

436
00:21:22,880 --> 00:21:25,320
Speaker 5: me down to then build me up? Is that?

437
00:21:25,320 --> 00:21:27,439
Speaker 2: What's one? Am I? Here? Is this the thing that

438
00:21:27,600 --> 00:21:28,080
Speaker 2: because you.

439
00:21:28,160 --> 00:21:32,840
Speaker 5: Just are you breaking my spirit with Sean giving up

440
00:21:32,920 --> 00:21:36,000
Speaker 5: on the show and you screaming at me?

441
00:21:36,359 --> 00:21:37,560
Speaker 2: Is this the crowd work.

442
00:21:37,840 --> 00:21:44,399
Speaker 5: Yes, this is right. Yes, the crowd isn't laughing. That's

443
00:21:44,520 --> 00:21:47,479
Speaker 5: what I envision it would be like to be Matt Rife.

444
00:21:47,920 --> 00:21:51,960
Speaker 5: The crowd is not laughing. It hurts. And I say

445
00:21:52,000 --> 00:21:54,280
Speaker 5: to the crowd, are you guys trying to break me

446
00:21:54,400 --> 00:21:56,640
Speaker 5: down so you can then build me back up?

447
00:21:57,640 --> 00:22:01,480
Speaker 4: Okay, you're right, the crowd isn't laughing. You're picturing being

448
00:22:01,480 --> 00:22:04,760
Speaker 4: Matt Rife. The crowd is not laughing.

449
00:22:05,160 --> 00:22:08,080
Speaker 2: They are streaking with glee.

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00:22:08,480 --> 00:22:10,800
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's not mere laughter.

451
00:22:11,280 --> 00:22:16,440
Speaker 4: It sounds explosive screams. Yes, ecstasy. It sounds like that

452
00:22:16,600 --> 00:22:18,400
Speaker 4: they're on a plane that's going down.

453
00:22:19,000 --> 00:22:24,280
Speaker 2: That's it. But but it's it. But it's pure ecstatic terror.

454
00:22:24,760 --> 00:22:25,800
Speaker 1: I have a persona.

455
00:22:26,040 --> 00:22:29,119
Speaker 3: I have a persona that could become popular online, Matt

456
00:22:29,240 --> 00:22:30,320
Speaker 3: Rife trad wife.

457
00:22:31,520 --> 00:22:36,240
Speaker 4: It's two things people are, things people are talking about.

458
00:22:36,320 --> 00:22:37,240
Speaker 2: Don't know why.

459
00:22:37,119 --> 00:22:40,040
Speaker 4: I don't know what is really going on with with

460
00:22:40,160 --> 00:22:42,360
Speaker 4: either of them or how they necessarily combine, but it's

461
00:22:42,400 --> 00:22:43,840
Speaker 4: definitely two things that people are.

462
00:22:45,000 --> 00:22:48,040
Speaker 3: Can you admit that at least if nothing else the

463
00:22:48,080 --> 00:22:50,240
Speaker 3: whole episode, and it has been nothing else.

464
00:22:50,200 --> 00:22:54,280
Speaker 5: So far, And who can who admit when you.

465
00:22:54,320 --> 00:22:57,040
Speaker 3: Admit Martha Belave that those are two things people are

466
00:22:57,040 --> 00:22:57,880
Speaker 3: talking about and.

467
00:23:00,119 --> 00:23:01,560
Speaker 1: Essentially have rhymed them.

468
00:23:01,600 --> 00:23:05,600
Speaker 5: Now, I admit that, but you gave me an idea

469
00:23:05,720 --> 00:23:09,120
Speaker 5: for a joke. I could do well because I saw

470
00:23:09,280 --> 00:23:13,639
Speaker 5: tild wife do it on TikTok okay, okay, So I.

471
00:23:13,720 --> 00:23:16,200
Speaker 2: Come, I'm sorry. You need to touch.

472
00:23:16,000 --> 00:23:19,800
Speaker 5: Grass, I won't. I will not touch grass, even when

473
00:23:19,800 --> 00:23:22,400
Speaker 5: I'm literally on the grass, I won't touch it.

474
00:23:22,400 --> 00:23:25,240
Speaker 4: It's fine. I I also was kind of nervous about it,

475
00:23:25,280 --> 00:23:26,639
Speaker 4: but like it is not it's not.

476
00:23:26,880 --> 00:23:28,560
Speaker 2: It's a little bugs.

477
00:23:28,040 --> 00:23:29,960
Speaker 1: And stuff on it, but you you can.

478
00:23:30,440 --> 00:23:32,280
Speaker 2: It doesn't look but it kind of is, but it's

479
00:23:32,320 --> 00:23:32,920
Speaker 2: not that bad.

480
00:23:32,960 --> 00:23:36,560
Speaker 5: And there's dirt under it. A lot of people don't

481
00:23:36,560 --> 00:23:36,800
Speaker 5: know that.

482
00:23:37,119 --> 00:23:39,800
Speaker 4: It's sharp as hell and with you with your arms,

483
00:23:39,840 --> 00:23:42,080
Speaker 4: you're not even getting in the dirt. You might barely

484
00:23:42,119 --> 00:23:43,160
Speaker 4: even get to the grass.

485
00:23:43,200 --> 00:23:44,440
Speaker 2: Sorry.

486
00:23:44,760 --> 00:23:46,679
Speaker 3: I do want to talk about sometimes if you're in

487
00:23:46,720 --> 00:23:51,120
Speaker 3: the stadium, they have advertisements for different like companies that

488
00:23:51,320 --> 00:23:53,640
Speaker 3: support the stadium, and a lot of times because it's

489
00:23:53,640 --> 00:23:59,159
Speaker 3: the sporting event, there will be like a a ticket

490
00:23:59,640 --> 00:24:04,080
Speaker 3: sale company who has a banner, and I just want

491
00:24:04,080 --> 00:24:07,280
Speaker 3: to warn you in advance if you see a sign

492
00:24:07,359 --> 00:24:08,399
Speaker 3: that says stub hub.

493
00:24:08,680 --> 00:24:10,639
Speaker 6: That is not a potential dating app for you.

494
00:24:12,840 --> 00:24:17,520
Speaker 3: M hm. That that is actually where people go to

495
00:24:17,760 --> 00:24:19,040
Speaker 3: buy tickets for an event.

496
00:24:19,600 --> 00:24:21,760
Speaker 1: So like, don't try to make a profile.

497
00:24:21,760 --> 00:24:25,280
Speaker 3: It's not it's especially not from stage while you're talking

498
00:24:25,280 --> 00:24:26,200
Speaker 3: to Taylor Swift.

499
00:24:26,600 --> 00:24:28,760
Speaker 2: That's not where you find like a stubby hubb or.

500
00:24:29,160 --> 00:24:33,480
Speaker 1: Stub hu hubby. Yeah, yeah, I don't.

501
00:24:33,320 --> 00:24:35,720
Speaker 5: Want I want a guy with arms that are way

502
00:24:35,800 --> 00:24:40,840
Speaker 5: too long to compensate from my t Rex arms. And

503
00:24:40,880 --> 00:24:42,840
Speaker 5: then together we can reach stuff.

504
00:24:44,720 --> 00:24:48,040
Speaker 2: What are you doing in the.

505
00:24:46,960 --> 00:24:50,360
Speaker 5: In the show, in the halftime show.

506
00:24:51,640 --> 00:24:54,000
Speaker 4: Well, this is going to have to be part of it, Okay,

507
00:24:54,119 --> 00:24:56,240
Speaker 4: so because like again we have so little time, so

508
00:24:56,320 --> 00:24:57,840
Speaker 4: this has to be part of it. It's like now

509
00:24:57,880 --> 00:25:00,280
Speaker 4: it has to be about, like you finding it a

510
00:25:00,400 --> 00:25:03,520
Speaker 4: husband who's like in the crowd, who's reaching something for you.

511
00:25:03,920 --> 00:25:07,879
Speaker 5: Not a husband, just a just a boyfriend or even

512
00:25:08,080 --> 00:25:11,800
Speaker 5: we could even just be a situationship situationship.

513
00:25:11,920 --> 00:25:16,600
Speaker 4: Okay, you said we can reach things together. What is

514
00:25:16,720 --> 00:25:20,919
Speaker 4: the what is your contribution? I guess is my question.

515
00:25:22,520 --> 00:25:28,960
Speaker 5: I bring what people call personality plus okay, hmm, so

516
00:25:29,560 --> 00:25:33,280
Speaker 5: I bring the good vibes while he's reaching stuff up

517
00:25:33,280 --> 00:25:34,119
Speaker 5: on a high shelf.

518
00:25:34,600 --> 00:25:38,320
Speaker 2: Okay, you are gassing him up.

519
00:25:39,760 --> 00:25:41,080
Speaker 5: Yes, gassing him up?

520
00:25:41,200 --> 00:25:41,520
Speaker 2: Okay?

521
00:25:43,080 --> 00:25:48,399
Speaker 3: Uh yes, Martha, when you first did the show, you

522
00:25:48,480 --> 00:25:52,960
Speaker 3: had just moved here from Austin, right, yes. And do

523
00:25:53,080 --> 00:25:57,240
Speaker 3: you notice that immediately afterward all of comedy moved to Austin.

524
00:25:58,920 --> 00:26:01,920
Speaker 5: Like they heard I left and they all moved there.

525
00:26:02,000 --> 00:26:02,560
Speaker 2: Well, I'm just.

526
00:26:02,520 --> 00:26:07,840
Speaker 1: Wondering if you here again. You know what I mean,

527
00:26:09,560 --> 00:26:13,760
Speaker 1: because I miss it. I miss laughing. I love that.

528
00:26:14,840 --> 00:26:18,280
Speaker 1: I used to love it. I was looking forward to

529
00:26:18,280 --> 00:26:19,440
Speaker 1: doing it at the super Bowl.

530
00:26:20,760 --> 00:26:23,560
Speaker 5: I can't.

531
00:26:25,119 --> 00:26:27,200
Speaker 1: Okay, I'm gonna get back in here.

532
00:26:27,400 --> 00:26:31,800
Speaker 6: WHOA, Okay, let's figure this out. Maybe I've been too

533
00:26:31,840 --> 00:26:32,240
Speaker 6: hard on you.

534
00:26:32,280 --> 00:26:32,760
Speaker 1: Maybe it's me.

535
00:26:33,240 --> 00:26:37,640
Speaker 5: I mean, this has been nothing but ableism from the

536
00:26:37,680 --> 00:26:38,760
Speaker 5: minute you start.

537
00:26:39,480 --> 00:26:44,240
Speaker 2: You kept going too long. It's been nothing.

538
00:26:44,240 --> 00:26:46,399
Speaker 1: It's been nothing so far but work. But it's a

539
00:26:46,440 --> 00:26:49,480
Speaker 1: fresh start, right now, let's reset. Okay, Please don't try

540
00:26:49,480 --> 00:26:50,200
Speaker 1: to hit me again.

541
00:26:51,760 --> 00:26:54,480
Speaker 5: I'm angrier now than I was when I tried to

542
00:26:54,560 --> 00:26:58,720
Speaker 5: hit you before. Now i'm genuine camera, but now you're

543
00:26:58,720 --> 00:27:03,240
Speaker 5: on camera. Yeah, I can't. That's a legal situation.

544
00:27:03,359 --> 00:27:04,720
Speaker 6: I could sue you for injury.

545
00:27:05,040 --> 00:27:07,480
Speaker 1: Mom as we plan to do to headgum at some point.

546
00:27:07,840 --> 00:27:16,520
Speaker 5: Whoa, whoa, Okay, let's go, guys, come out.

547
00:27:16,600 --> 00:27:18,639
Speaker 2: You say it's me Lamar.

548
00:27:19,119 --> 00:27:25,480
Speaker 1: It's me, it's me Lamar, pretty good star.

549
00:27:25,680 --> 00:27:28,080
Speaker 5: And then I say, and you're like Spain.

550
00:27:28,200 --> 00:27:30,080
Speaker 4: Do it in like a way that's like from Spain,

551
00:27:30,280 --> 00:27:33,160
Speaker 4: so it's not like weird weird.

552
00:27:33,320 --> 00:27:35,680
Speaker 5: Yeah, hello, it's me Lamar.

553
00:27:37,160 --> 00:27:41,560
Speaker 2: Good from your You say I'm from Marthlona.

554
00:27:41,440 --> 00:27:47,520
Speaker 5: From I'm far Malona. I'm from Okay, Hi.

555
00:27:47,440 --> 00:27:50,720
Speaker 2: Guys, that's my. Then, yeah, that's my that's my full name.

556
00:27:51,119 --> 00:27:53,359
Speaker 2: My name is Lamar Martha Kelly.

557
00:27:55,320 --> 00:27:57,800
Speaker 5: Hello, Hello, it's me.

558
00:27:58,119 --> 00:28:04,520
Speaker 4: Don't say hello, Okay, it's a la hello. That's that's

559
00:28:04,520 --> 00:28:05,960
Speaker 4: how the French people say it.

560
00:28:06,119 --> 00:28:13,639
Speaker 5: Oh la escuse me? Is god Lamar full name Marcelona

561
00:28:14,560 --> 00:28:19,560
Speaker 5: k K. And I'm here to say an audios.

562
00:28:19,600 --> 00:28:22,120
Speaker 6: Time to hit the fucking bathrooms.

563
00:28:22,520 --> 00:28:25,680
Speaker 5: When is the building me up part gonna start?

564
00:28:27,080 --> 00:28:28,600
Speaker 2: I thought that's what you were supposed to be.

565
00:28:29,080 --> 00:28:31,760
Speaker 4: Why is it that you need to like that's only

566
00:28:31,760 --> 00:28:35,520
Speaker 4: when I have to reach something for you that you

567
00:28:35,560 --> 00:28:36,800
Speaker 4: start building me up.

568
00:28:37,640 --> 00:28:39,960
Speaker 5: Okay, first of.

569
00:28:39,920 --> 00:28:45,120
Speaker 4: All, I'm the like, we're giving you this opportunity and

570
00:28:45,160 --> 00:28:46,600
Speaker 4: you need more than that. Now we have to like

571
00:28:46,640 --> 00:28:47,840
Speaker 4: build you up even more.

572
00:28:48,800 --> 00:28:52,680
Speaker 3: Jesse David Fox had an idea that a stand up

573
00:28:52,720 --> 00:28:53,800
Speaker 3: could do the Super Bowl.

574
00:28:53,840 --> 00:28:56,680
Speaker 4: Let's get back to the roots of this I've forgotten even.

575
00:28:56,720 --> 00:29:01,480
Speaker 3: Was a genius innovation. No one else was trying to

576
00:29:01,600 --> 00:29:04,160
Speaker 3: fix something that has been broken for.

577
00:29:04,080 --> 00:29:09,080
Speaker 1: A long time. We were able to take the reins

578
00:29:09,360 --> 00:29:12,600
Speaker 1: and bring his vision to life. And we are now

579
00:29:12,640 --> 00:29:14,120
Speaker 1: on the precipice of.

580
00:29:14,280 --> 00:29:21,600
Speaker 3: Completely eliminating music from American culture forever. And you are

581
00:29:21,640 --> 00:29:24,400
Speaker 3: the warrior who can help us do it. You are

582
00:29:25,240 --> 00:29:30,360
Speaker 3: the Martha in the arena. Okay, yes, the glory shall

583
00:29:30,440 --> 00:29:36,520
Speaker 3: belong to you. But what we need is something, anything

584
00:29:36,560 --> 00:29:38,920
Speaker 3: that people will enjoy that you can say while you're

585
00:29:38,920 --> 00:29:39,320
Speaker 3: in there.

586
00:29:39,440 --> 00:29:42,680
Speaker 4: This could be actually having Martha at the super Bowl

587
00:29:42,800 --> 00:29:45,440
Speaker 4: make an overture to Taylor swift could be part of

588
00:29:45,480 --> 00:29:48,840
Speaker 4: how we eliminate music from I get rid of music.

589
00:29:49,040 --> 00:29:51,760
Speaker 4: She would move to Austin instantly.

590
00:29:52,200 --> 00:29:54,400
Speaker 5: Taylor swift Wood, or I would no.

591
00:29:54,640 --> 00:29:55,880
Speaker 2: Taylor swift Wood.

592
00:29:56,600 --> 00:29:58,800
Speaker 1: I can finally defeat my enemy music.

593
00:29:59,600 --> 00:30:02,800
Speaker 4: Do you know Jesse David Fox. No, Okay, well that's

594
00:30:02,840 --> 00:30:04,400
Speaker 4: what he knows you. Deliberate choice.

595
00:30:04,400 --> 00:30:06,760
Speaker 2: He knows you. He knows you. He doesn't want you

596
00:30:06,840 --> 00:30:07,440
Speaker 2: to know.

597
00:30:07,680 --> 00:30:09,440
Speaker 5: Can I google him on my phone?

598
00:30:10,640 --> 00:30:14,640
Speaker 4: Probably you probably can't, not right now because he has

599
00:30:14,720 --> 00:30:16,320
Speaker 4: obviously taken great pains.

600
00:30:16,400 --> 00:30:18,960
Speaker 1: So my suspicion is that you are blocked on Google.

601
00:30:20,760 --> 00:30:26,920
Speaker 5: Jesse David Fox. Okay, was he on Beverly Hills nine

602
00:30:26,920 --> 00:30:27,600
Speaker 5: O two one zero?

603
00:30:30,080 --> 00:30:32,360
Speaker 1: If he was, that's not a primary part of.

604
00:30:32,280 --> 00:30:35,000
Speaker 5: His lore, Jesse David Fox.

605
00:30:38,480 --> 00:30:42,920
Speaker 4: He look, it doesn't matter like what he's the type

606
00:30:42,920 --> 00:30:45,720
Speaker 4: of person like he puts he's not putting himself out

607
00:30:45,760 --> 00:30:50,000
Speaker 4: there in the world, like he's putting ideas into the world.

608
00:30:50,480 --> 00:30:51,680
Speaker 5: Is he a podcast?

609
00:30:52,320 --> 00:31:03,280
Speaker 1: Yes, all of the above. He's uh cultural genius. And

610
00:31:03,320 --> 00:31:07,760
Speaker 1: he's our pre evidence comedy journalist.

611
00:31:08,040 --> 00:31:09,600
Speaker 5: Oh a journalist okay.

612
00:31:09,720 --> 00:31:14,640
Speaker 4: And he wrote an article in I think twenty twenty

613
00:31:14,680 --> 00:31:20,680
Speaker 4: three at this point, okay, saying that a comedian should

614
00:31:20,680 --> 00:31:23,880
Speaker 4: host the Super Bowl halftime show. We have brought in

615
00:31:24,400 --> 00:31:29,800
Speaker 4: a number of comedians to take a swing at it.

616
00:31:30,160 --> 00:31:33,200
Speaker 5: Okay, we sit up straight scheduleing.

617
00:31:33,320 --> 00:31:36,840
Speaker 1: But Bill Hines, we are now here. Yeah, Bill Hines.

618
00:31:37,000 --> 00:31:37,320
Speaker 5: Okay.

619
00:31:37,440 --> 00:31:39,200
Speaker 2: Bob moynihan came in.

620
00:31:39,480 --> 00:31:43,320
Speaker 5: I love I'm a big I'm a big fan of his.

621
00:31:43,560 --> 00:31:45,000
Speaker 1: I don't he didn't mention you at all.

622
00:31:45,520 --> 00:31:47,680
Speaker 5: I didn't. I, well, he doesn't.

623
00:31:47,400 --> 00:31:48,720
Speaker 2: Mention a lot of people.

624
00:31:49,040 --> 00:31:51,720
Speaker 5: Well, I've never met why would he know? Why would

625
00:31:51,720 --> 00:31:54,160
Speaker 5: he mention me? We've never met and I'm not famous.

626
00:31:54,400 --> 00:31:56,760
Speaker 5: I know him because he's on Saurday Night Live.

627
00:31:57,960 --> 00:32:03,400
Speaker 2: God damn it, he's not on Turnout Live anymore.

628
00:32:03,560 --> 00:32:06,680
Speaker 1: Bobby moynihan, Yeah, no, he's on, mister Mayor. Now.

629
00:32:08,840 --> 00:32:11,640
Speaker 5: I didn't know who Jesse David Fox.

630
00:32:11,520 --> 00:32:16,840
Speaker 4: Was Muna because Muna was here, and yes they are music,

631
00:32:17,000 --> 00:32:18,520
Speaker 4: but they were not there to.

632
00:32:19,000 --> 00:32:20,960
Speaker 1: Don't let Taylor hear you say, who's Muna?

633
00:32:21,000 --> 00:32:21,680
Speaker 6: They opened for?

634
00:32:24,000 --> 00:32:26,200
Speaker 5: Have you ever met Gracie Abrams. I'm a fan of

635
00:32:26,240 --> 00:32:27,000
Speaker 5: her music too.

636
00:32:28,920 --> 00:32:32,400
Speaker 3: We tried to do We tried to do the TikTok

637
00:32:32,480 --> 00:32:35,400
Speaker 3: trend video to her thing. We could not get the

638
00:32:35,440 --> 00:32:40,080
Speaker 3: timing right, yes, singing so fast.

639
00:32:40,200 --> 00:32:42,959
Speaker 4: Yeah, and you have to be crazy. The TikTok thing

640
00:32:43,040 --> 00:32:45,280
Speaker 4: is like you're walking at the same time that could.

641
00:32:46,000 --> 00:32:48,840
Speaker 1: We couldn't get a long enough space to walk.

642
00:32:49,520 --> 00:32:51,760
Speaker 3: We kept having to turn, and then the camera's not

643
00:32:51,840 --> 00:32:54,160
Speaker 3: on you while you're doing the whips because the camera

644
00:32:54,240 --> 00:32:57,120
Speaker 3: goes around the corner first, and whoever's got the camera's

645
00:32:57,160 --> 00:32:58,280
Speaker 3: got to be going backwards.

646
00:32:58,720 --> 00:33:00,400
Speaker 1: I don't know how they do that.

647
00:33:00,520 --> 00:33:02,640
Speaker 4: What I find when I'm trying to sing and walk,

648
00:33:03,560 --> 00:33:07,000
Speaker 4: my just my upper body pitches forward, my feet don't

649
00:33:07,000 --> 00:33:10,640
Speaker 4: want to do anything, and like my whole head first,

650
00:33:10,920 --> 00:33:13,480
Speaker 4: I'm just until down.

651
00:33:13,360 --> 00:33:17,480
Speaker 5: You fall down. Yes, I'm sorry. Hey, that is a

652
00:33:17,720 --> 00:33:19,520
Speaker 5: that is a tough road to hoe.

653
00:33:20,040 --> 00:33:25,200
Speaker 4: It's uh, thank you really so much for saying that.

654
00:33:25,720 --> 00:33:27,720
Speaker 4: But I do just want to know why i'd be

655
00:33:27,760 --> 00:33:29,600
Speaker 4: hoeing a road I don't.

656
00:33:29,800 --> 00:33:33,200
Speaker 5: I don't know. I'm tired of being raked over the

657
00:33:33,280 --> 00:33:34,520
Speaker 5: coals from.

658
00:33:34,440 --> 00:33:43,480
Speaker 4: My breaks, like terrible speaking.

659
00:33:41,000 --> 00:33:45,160
Speaker 5: Just because I'm not good at supply hard wording things.

660
00:33:45,400 --> 00:33:50,520
Speaker 5: Is really I've never been suspiciously attacked.

661
00:33:51,480 --> 00:33:54,280
Speaker 2: Just a segue from Martha.

662
00:33:54,520 --> 00:33:58,920
Speaker 5: It's signing off from the worst super Bowl halftime show

663
00:33:58,960 --> 00:33:59,680
Speaker 5: you've ever seen.

664
00:34:02,120 --> 00:34:06,600
Speaker 4: And then it's like, but this isn't the time. I

665
00:34:06,760 --> 00:34:09,200
Speaker 4: ate ship the most. I tried out for Drill team

666
00:34:09,400 --> 00:34:11,840
Speaker 4: and actually DLL team.

667
00:34:12,160 --> 00:34:14,320
Speaker 5: I tried it for dilt for Guilt team, and it

668
00:34:14,400 --> 00:34:16,880
Speaker 5: put me in a bit of a pickle.

669
00:34:16,920 --> 00:34:18,800
Speaker 2: That's what we have now that we know works.

670
00:34:19,120 --> 00:34:22,120
Speaker 5: And then and then we have and then I bring

671
00:34:22,160 --> 00:34:26,120
Speaker 5: out the drill with the pickle on it. Yeah, flies off,

672
00:34:26,360 --> 00:34:31,200
Speaker 5: goes up its president in the forehead. He falls over.

673
00:34:31,920 --> 00:34:33,839
Speaker 3: I guess I don't want to do this, but I

674
00:34:33,880 --> 00:34:35,560
Speaker 3: have to say it out loud, just so we can

675
00:34:35,640 --> 00:34:38,239
Speaker 3: all decide not to do it, because there is a

676
00:34:38,280 --> 00:34:39,879
Speaker 3: pickle sticking off the end of it.

677
00:34:41,239 --> 00:34:44,239
Speaker 6: He say, I can't believe it.

678
00:34:44,400 --> 00:34:44,759
Speaker 2: I have to.

679
00:34:44,880 --> 00:34:46,719
Speaker 4: I can't believe you're going to do this, Martha, and

680
00:34:46,800 --> 00:34:49,360
Speaker 4: I don't like it one bit. I cannot believe that

681
00:34:49,400 --> 00:34:51,200
Speaker 4: you put us in this position, that you're going to

682
00:34:51,280 --> 00:34:51,560
Speaker 4: do this.

683
00:34:51,760 --> 00:34:54,600
Speaker 3: But you do have to say something to the effect of, like,

684
00:34:54,760 --> 00:34:57,120
Speaker 3: I swear to God, this is a drill even though

685
00:34:57,160 --> 00:34:58,600
Speaker 3: it looks more like a drill dough.

686
00:35:01,520 --> 00:35:05,360
Speaker 5: I don't work blue, and I will not work Blue.

687
00:35:05,520 --> 00:35:09,479
Speaker 4: You say, I don't work I will never as long

688
00:35:09,520 --> 00:35:10,040
Speaker 4: as I live.

689
00:35:10,080 --> 00:35:12,640
Speaker 2: But you've put me in this.

690
00:35:12,360 --> 00:35:16,640
Speaker 1: This is the I've ever been with anyone. I will

691
00:35:16,680 --> 00:35:19,440
Speaker 1: not do that, and I've been mistreated.

692
00:35:22,120 --> 00:35:27,560
Speaker 4: You have to dance at this point, Okay in the

693
00:35:28,120 --> 00:35:28,960
Speaker 4: halftime show.

694
00:35:29,239 --> 00:35:32,799
Speaker 5: Okay, what like?

695
00:35:32,920 --> 00:35:39,279
Speaker 4: What's like? What's the shortest dance you do? The shortest one?

696
00:35:39,560 --> 00:35:44,040
Speaker 1: He hit the wall. I don't want to put ideas

697
00:35:44,040 --> 00:35:44,399
Speaker 1: in your head.

698
00:35:44,400 --> 00:35:50,160
Speaker 5: What's the sort the only dance? Why I only know

699
00:35:50,239 --> 00:35:53,360
Speaker 5: one dance. It's the rerun dance from What's Happening.

700
00:35:53,560 --> 00:35:54,640
Speaker 2: That's way too long.

701
00:35:55,000 --> 00:35:55,880
Speaker 5: It's only that's.

702
00:35:55,800 --> 00:35:57,480
Speaker 1: Only when I know time for it.

703
00:35:57,600 --> 00:35:59,200
Speaker 5: That's the only dance I know. I can do a

704
00:35:59,239 --> 00:36:00,799
Speaker 5: little part of it. I can do this.

705
00:36:00,880 --> 00:36:06,560
Speaker 4: How about this first mock arena? Boom hand right, hand out,

706
00:36:06,719 --> 00:36:07,319
Speaker 4: palm down.

707
00:36:07,480 --> 00:36:09,319
Speaker 5: What about Martha Rena.

708
00:36:09,280 --> 00:36:10,160
Speaker 2: The Martha Arena?

709
00:36:10,360 --> 00:36:15,200
Speaker 4: That's right, So Martha Rena is good to celebrate my culture. Yes,

710
00:36:15,360 --> 00:36:17,960
Speaker 4: you think that the mockerna is from Spain?

711
00:36:18,640 --> 00:36:19,680
Speaker 2: Yeah, and you.

712
00:36:19,640 --> 00:36:23,040
Speaker 5: Just Martha Arena. And then all the lights go black

713
00:36:23,120 --> 00:36:25,719
Speaker 5: and I try to sneak off the stage, but I

714
00:36:25,840 --> 00:36:27,480
Speaker 5: trip and fall because it's dark.

715
00:36:27,719 --> 00:36:31,799
Speaker 3: That's good, I think, because we have announced obviously that

716
00:36:31,880 --> 00:36:35,840
Speaker 3: you're doing the show, and your name is out there,

717
00:36:37,160 --> 00:36:39,480
Speaker 3: our best option right now is just to play a

718
00:36:39,520 --> 00:36:41,800
Speaker 3: few minutes of the film Martha Marcy May Marley.

719
00:36:44,000 --> 00:36:47,960
Speaker 1: That movie is in terms of like, well, so is

720
00:36:48,000 --> 00:36:49,520
Speaker 1: this Martha?

721
00:36:49,800 --> 00:36:50,359
Speaker 2: So is this?

722
00:36:51,160 --> 00:36:52,360
Speaker 5: I'm that's fair?

723
00:36:53,160 --> 00:36:54,319
Speaker 2: You know what I just thought was like.

724
00:36:55,960 --> 00:36:58,120
Speaker 4: And I and I wish we weren't doing this, and

725
00:36:58,200 --> 00:37:01,160
Speaker 4: we were, we could actually make plan if you were

726
00:37:01,160 --> 00:37:07,000
Speaker 4: on the voice and you do the Mockerna as your song, okay,

727
00:37:07,120 --> 00:37:10,560
Speaker 4: and you get the judges to do the Mockerina and

728
00:37:10,600 --> 00:37:14,399
Speaker 4: they accidentally reach out they hit the button as their

729
00:37:14,440 --> 00:37:18,640
Speaker 4: first act. So small, they all turn around, that's so

730
00:37:18,640 --> 00:37:19,520
Speaker 4: small because they just.

731
00:37:19,480 --> 00:37:21,440
Speaker 2: Got wait wait wait wait wait arena.

732
00:37:21,719 --> 00:37:23,920
Speaker 4: Yeah, and it's too late, and they like it'd be

733
00:37:24,080 --> 00:37:27,200
Speaker 4: so embarrassing for like, their only job is to not

734
00:37:27,280 --> 00:37:30,200
Speaker 4: hit the button by accident. None of them would admit

735
00:37:30,280 --> 00:37:33,000
Speaker 4: to it. And you do it every time every show

736
00:37:33,040 --> 00:37:33,319
Speaker 4: you do.

737
00:37:33,440 --> 00:37:36,040
Speaker 2: The song is is the Mockerena.

738
00:37:35,560 --> 00:37:39,319
Speaker 3: Is a gentleman once again the mock Arena performing the

739
00:37:39,360 --> 00:37:42,160
Speaker 3: mock Arena for the fourth consecutive week.

740
00:37:43,719 --> 00:37:44,440
Speaker 1: It's Martha.

741
00:37:45,239 --> 00:37:47,600
Speaker 5: I'll do that. If you guys do know how I

742
00:37:47,600 --> 00:37:51,560
Speaker 5: can get on the voice? Can you put me in

743
00:37:51,600 --> 00:37:53,800
Speaker 5: touch with their people or or something.

744
00:37:54,080 --> 00:37:55,200
Speaker 2: Who are the judges now?

745
00:37:55,520 --> 00:37:57,719
Speaker 5: I don't know because I can't reach the TV to

746
00:37:57,800 --> 00:37:58,239
Speaker 5: turn it on.

747
00:37:59,000 --> 00:37:59,880
Speaker 2: That sucks.

748
00:38:00,280 --> 00:38:01,720
Speaker 6: That's really fucking brutal.

749
00:38:02,200 --> 00:38:06,880
Speaker 5: Yeah. Well, I didn't ask for these t rex arms.

750
00:38:06,920 --> 00:38:09,040
Speaker 5: I was born with them, and if you believe it

751
00:38:09,160 --> 00:38:11,360
Speaker 5: or not, they were even smaller when I was born.

752
00:38:12,200 --> 00:38:13,960
Speaker 5: And I know that's hard to imagine.

753
00:38:14,480 --> 00:38:20,319
Speaker 2: That is that is crazy? I assume Sorry, what's that.

754
00:38:22,840 --> 00:38:25,680
Speaker 1: Just me becoming incredibly nauseous, imagining.

755
00:38:29,920 --> 00:38:31,400
Speaker 2: Even smaller arms.

756
00:38:33,000 --> 00:38:37,680
Speaker 4: So so, okay, we did the dance portion done just

757
00:38:37,719 --> 00:38:40,840
Speaker 4: when people are starting to wonder what's happening.

758
00:38:40,440 --> 00:38:40,960
Speaker 2: It's over.

759
00:38:42,040 --> 00:38:43,239
Speaker 5: That's how I love to do it.

760
00:38:43,480 --> 00:38:45,440
Speaker 2: Singing. We know what you're doing.

761
00:38:45,239 --> 00:38:47,480
Speaker 5: There, Macara, Hi Taylor.

762
00:38:47,680 --> 00:38:50,480
Speaker 4: I don't know about you, but I'm almost twenty two,

763
00:38:51,280 --> 00:38:51,880
Speaker 4: three quarters.

764
00:38:51,920 --> 00:38:52,880
Speaker 2: My birthday is in July.

765
00:38:54,320 --> 00:38:57,880
Speaker 4: I'm feeling good about this part of the show.

766
00:38:58,239 --> 00:39:01,640
Speaker 5: Yeah, okay, and then I'll do this is the joke

767
00:39:01,719 --> 00:39:06,960
Speaker 5: I saw child wife do. I go, I go, I

768
00:39:07,040 --> 00:39:09,360
Speaker 5: have a big smile. I can't do her big smile,

769
00:39:09,400 --> 00:39:11,440
Speaker 5: but I have a big smile. And I leaned forward

770
00:39:11,480 --> 00:39:16,800
Speaker 5: and I go, I'm not a feminist. I can cook.

771
00:39:17,480 --> 00:39:20,440
Speaker 5: And then the crowd goes fucking insane.

772
00:39:21,680 --> 00:39:23,160
Speaker 2: Okay, And so then.

773
00:39:23,280 --> 00:39:26,160
Speaker 5: It's a big hit on TikTok it's a viral, Okay.

774
00:39:26,200 --> 00:39:28,520
Speaker 4: But then you are gonna have to We did comedy,

775
00:39:28,520 --> 00:39:30,120
Speaker 4: we did sing we did dancing. You are going to

776
00:39:30,200 --> 00:39:33,600
Speaker 4: have to like cook something if you can introduce something

777
00:39:33,640 --> 00:39:34,359
Speaker 4: like that other thing.

778
00:39:34,680 --> 00:39:35,640
Speaker 2: So what cook?

779
00:39:35,719 --> 00:39:39,720
Speaker 4: How can you in a Super Bowl halftime show? Okay,

780
00:39:40,200 --> 00:39:45,840
Speaker 4: environment there's like not a lot of cooking materials around.

781
00:39:45,920 --> 00:39:49,640
Speaker 5: Really, I can bring my I can bring my air.

782
00:39:49,840 --> 00:39:53,239
Speaker 2: You have you have a pickle on a drill? Could

783
00:39:53,320 --> 00:39:54,320
Speaker 2: you like, is there.

784
00:39:54,480 --> 00:39:57,120
Speaker 3: That can that somehow come back around and can seem

785
00:39:57,120 --> 00:39:59,640
Speaker 3: intentional what we're doing here because we are now bringing

786
00:39:59,640 --> 00:40:00,480
Speaker 3: it back of food?

787
00:40:00,760 --> 00:40:03,280
Speaker 5: Okay, I could make relish right?

788
00:40:03,880 --> 00:40:07,000
Speaker 2: How about this? Well? Oh, how about this? How about this?

789
00:40:07,360 --> 00:40:09,520
Speaker 3: I'm not disagreeing with you that you could do that,

790
00:40:09,560 --> 00:40:10,720
Speaker 3: but Hises has a different idea.

791
00:40:10,800 --> 00:40:14,680
Speaker 4: Earlier in the show, you did the dill team joke. Right,

792
00:40:15,360 --> 00:40:19,759
Speaker 4: you spin the drill and again, I'm begging you not

793
00:40:19,840 --> 00:40:21,840
Speaker 4: to kill the president as you just said in the

794
00:40:21,920 --> 00:40:23,239
Speaker 4: run of show that you were gonna do.

795
00:40:23,320 --> 00:40:24,520
Speaker 2: So maybe we go back.

796
00:40:25,480 --> 00:40:28,480
Speaker 4: Maybe we go back and change that, and you you

797
00:40:28,640 --> 00:40:30,759
Speaker 4: spin the drill so the pickle goes straight up in

798
00:40:30,800 --> 00:40:33,680
Speaker 4: the air. Then you have the entire song and dance portion.

799
00:40:33,800 --> 00:40:36,520
Speaker 4: You do your TikTok bit. You say, I'm not a feminist.

800
00:40:36,640 --> 00:40:38,960
Speaker 4: I can cook. You hold out a hot dog bun.

801
00:40:39,080 --> 00:40:42,319
Speaker 4: The pickle lands right in the hot dog buns in

802
00:40:42,320 --> 00:40:43,640
Speaker 4: there like a hot dog.

803
00:40:43,880 --> 00:40:48,239
Speaker 1: Big bite, big bite, the pickle in the hot dog.

804
00:40:48,320 --> 00:40:53,680
Speaker 4: You eat how much three quarters with this is how

805
00:40:53,760 --> 00:40:55,399
Speaker 4: close I am to turn in twenty two.

806
00:40:56,800 --> 00:41:00,200
Speaker 2: You eat three quarters of a not a girt in

807
00:41:00,600 --> 00:41:02,640
Speaker 2: more corny sean.

808
00:41:03,000 --> 00:41:06,640
Speaker 4: You eat a full size You know those pickles that

809
00:41:06,680 --> 00:41:09,920
Speaker 4: are named like a dill pickle, it's a dill pickle,

810
00:41:09,960 --> 00:41:12,840
Speaker 4: but it's one of those like gas station bag pickles

811
00:41:12,880 --> 00:41:15,640
Speaker 4: like these. This it's like and it's called like Big

812
00:41:15,719 --> 00:41:16,640
Speaker 4: Larry or something.

813
00:41:16,760 --> 00:41:21,680
Speaker 1: You know, yes, I know, like stinking Maurice.

814
00:41:21,960 --> 00:41:27,640
Speaker 4: Yes, yes, yes, it's like a name. Yes, the normal

815
00:41:27,680 --> 00:41:29,920
Speaker 4: one is called big Larry. But you are eating stink

816
00:41:29,920 --> 00:41:33,480
Speaker 4: and Maurice, which is the which is the like garlicky

817
00:41:33,920 --> 00:41:38,200
Speaker 4: cheese flavored yea uh, gas station pickle?

818
00:41:38,320 --> 00:41:41,680
Speaker 5: Okay? Are there is there going to be easy bathroom

819
00:41:41,760 --> 00:41:46,839
Speaker 5: access at the Super Bowl pickles? It sounds like it's

820
00:41:46,880 --> 00:41:48,680
Speaker 5: gonna make me sick immediately.

821
00:41:48,760 --> 00:41:51,480
Speaker 3: The pickle isn't going to need to go to the bathroom.

822
00:41:51,520 --> 00:41:53,080
Speaker 3: I know it has a name, but it is still

823
00:41:53,160 --> 00:41:58,919
Speaker 3: just a pickle. So if you're worried about Maurice, he's fine.

824
00:41:59,160 --> 00:42:00,920
Speaker 5: It sounds like that might get sucked.

825
00:42:01,200 --> 00:42:04,040
Speaker 2: You chomp three quarters that you will vomit.

826
00:42:05,719 --> 00:42:07,040
Speaker 5: I don't want to go and do that too.

827
00:42:07,600 --> 00:42:11,320
Speaker 1: That really could help us.

828
00:42:12,360 --> 00:42:14,920
Speaker 5: If I ran off stage and said I had to

829
00:42:15,080 --> 00:42:16,960
Speaker 5: or if I did it on stage.

830
00:42:16,760 --> 00:42:19,640
Speaker 4: I don't understand why we are always coming back to

831
00:42:19,680 --> 00:42:25,760
Speaker 4: you run, And can we just get that idea out

832
00:42:25,840 --> 00:42:26,800
Speaker 4: of the mix.

833
00:42:27,080 --> 00:42:31,320
Speaker 3: Let's assume we'll stay on stage for the whole halftime show.

834
00:42:30,480 --> 00:42:31,799
Speaker 1: Just as a thought experiment.

835
00:42:32,719 --> 00:42:35,320
Speaker 3: Let's picture ourselves staying on stage for the entirety of

836
00:42:35,360 --> 00:42:38,480
Speaker 3: the show, and then if we get very sick, yes,

837
00:42:39,080 --> 00:42:44,120
Speaker 3: and then people looking back aren't gonna go wow. They really,

838
00:42:44,440 --> 00:42:47,080
Speaker 3: you know, kind of scrambled to plan this thing. They

839
00:42:47,120 --> 00:42:49,920
Speaker 3: really only came up with like one, you know, one

840
00:42:50,000 --> 00:42:50,680
Speaker 3: or two jokes.

841
00:42:50,719 --> 00:42:51,680
Speaker 1: One of them was Kevin's.

842
00:42:51,680 --> 00:42:55,120
Speaker 3: One was stolen from a viral trad wife TikTok, yeah,

843
00:42:55,360 --> 00:42:57,760
Speaker 3: you know, which is not a great look.

844
00:42:58,560 --> 00:43:02,000
Speaker 4: And the running thing just to like make to come

845
00:43:02,040 --> 00:43:05,160
Speaker 4: clean a little bit, like if things are really going south,

846
00:43:05,840 --> 00:43:12,040
Speaker 4: we will be shooting you with a tranquilizing arrow, so.

847
00:43:12,719 --> 00:43:16,040
Speaker 3: A dart is not so if you travel the distance

848
00:43:16,080 --> 00:43:18,279
Speaker 3: we need to be we're really far away because we

849
00:43:18,320 --> 00:43:19,120
Speaker 3: need to be able to.

850
00:43:19,160 --> 00:43:21,279
Speaker 1: Get out after we fire the air.

851
00:43:21,400 --> 00:43:21,880
Speaker 2: Yes, but.

852
00:43:23,800 --> 00:43:27,239
Speaker 1: Well, he wanted it to be a spear to call

853
00:43:27,280 --> 00:43:28,200
Speaker 1: you out.

854
00:43:28,000 --> 00:43:29,120
Speaker 2: Wanted to be.

855
00:43:31,160 --> 00:43:35,040
Speaker 4: Not like a killing spear, but like a javelin with

856
00:43:35,120 --> 00:43:39,959
Speaker 4: a tranquilizing agent on the tip. Pase, please please, please,

857
00:43:39,960 --> 00:43:44,200
Speaker 4: please please stop coming at me, Bartha, can we so?

858
00:43:44,320 --> 00:43:47,239
Speaker 4: Do you remember when Lady Gaga like rose up into

859
00:43:47,280 --> 00:43:51,080
Speaker 4: the air during the halftime, so she was just suddenly flying.

860
00:43:50,840 --> 00:43:57,279
Speaker 1: For all her monsters? That when she was that uh no, wait,

861
00:43:57,560 --> 00:44:02,719
Speaker 1: is that when she was what doing the zuper bowl

862
00:44:02,719 --> 00:44:05,120
Speaker 1: halfime go? What could possibly be?

863
00:44:05,320 --> 00:44:08,880
Speaker 5: I was, this is the this is my I'm gonna

864
00:44:08,880 --> 00:44:11,839
Speaker 5: come clean about something. You weren't you sing?

865
00:44:12,000 --> 00:44:15,200
Speaker 2: Because I just said it? Are you literally copying me

866
00:44:18,320 --> 00:44:18,719
Speaker 2: pretty good?

867
00:44:18,719 --> 00:44:20,319
Speaker 1: When Hayes said it? Let me try that on.

868
00:44:21,520 --> 00:44:24,480
Speaker 5: I pretended to think you were joking when you said

869
00:44:24,520 --> 00:44:26,560
Speaker 5: I have a pea brain like a t rex, but

870
00:44:26,680 --> 00:44:29,840
Speaker 5: I actually do have a being brain. Because I was

871
00:44:29,880 --> 00:44:33,000
Speaker 5: trying to think of the song that Alphabus sings in Wicked.

872
00:44:33,080 --> 00:44:36,959
Speaker 5: That's been all the rage, uh And I to say,

873
00:44:37,040 --> 00:44:40,120
Speaker 5: is that which Lady Gaga was singing when she flew away?

874
00:44:40,160 --> 00:44:42,680
Speaker 5: And I couldn't. I still can't even think of the

875
00:44:42,760 --> 00:44:45,000
Speaker 5: name of the song. Is it something about flying?

876
00:44:45,080 --> 00:44:46,799
Speaker 2: I wish I'd never known that.

877
00:44:47,000 --> 00:44:51,440
Speaker 5: It's something like it's deflying gravity, deflying gravity? Was that

878
00:44:51,520 --> 00:44:53,280
Speaker 5: what she was singing when she flew away.

879
00:44:53,440 --> 00:44:55,799
Speaker 2: My god, I can't believe you know what.

880
00:44:56,000 --> 00:44:58,320
Speaker 5: I didn't ask to be born with a pea brain

881
00:44:58,520 --> 00:45:00,919
Speaker 5: anymore than I asked to be born with these tea rotches.

882
00:45:01,040 --> 00:45:03,560
Speaker 4: I want to say, even being able to come up

883
00:45:03,600 --> 00:45:08,400
Speaker 4: with the song would not be It's not better, Yeah,

884
00:45:08,440 --> 00:45:12,839
Speaker 4: you know, it's actually it's better to not come up

885
00:45:12,880 --> 00:45:13,200
Speaker 4: with it.

886
00:45:13,880 --> 00:45:18,040
Speaker 3: Not having the song title is the most defensible aspect

887
00:45:18,080 --> 00:45:19,480
Speaker 3: of what you wanted to say.

888
00:45:19,560 --> 00:45:24,360
Speaker 4: Anyway, the sudden flying mechanism is still there at the

889
00:45:24,400 --> 00:45:24,959
Speaker 4: super Bowl.

890
00:45:25,520 --> 00:45:28,239
Speaker 2: We are hooked up to it, Sean and I.

891
00:45:29,080 --> 00:45:32,319
Speaker 4: Sean is hooked up to it, and I'm He's got

892
00:45:32,320 --> 00:45:35,920
Speaker 4: his arms wrapped around me, and I have the arrow

893
00:45:36,320 --> 00:45:39,640
Speaker 4: pulled back and we have choreographed it so that things

894
00:45:39,680 --> 00:45:41,280
Speaker 4: are going south.

895
00:45:42,080 --> 00:45:44,520
Speaker 2: We're going to be going north, which is up.

896
00:45:45,800 --> 00:45:55,240
Speaker 4: That's north, and I can account for now, after much training,

897
00:45:55,360 --> 00:45:59,680
Speaker 4: the backward thrust of the flying machine with a forward

898
00:45:59,719 --> 00:46:04,080
Speaker 4: threat that is needed to shoot you hard enough. So

899
00:46:04,560 --> 00:46:07,919
Speaker 4: if you are running away, please do not zig zag.

900
00:46:08,160 --> 00:46:09,280
Speaker 4: That's all I'm asking.

901
00:46:13,440 --> 00:46:17,440
Speaker 1: No, just make it sporting. Hayes will be dressed as Hawkeye,

902
00:46:17,520 --> 00:46:20,800
Speaker 1: so if anybody's like, why is that guy got an arrow? Hawky,

903
00:46:20,920 --> 00:46:22,560
Speaker 1: I'll be dressed like the Scarlet Witch.

904
00:46:22,640 --> 00:46:24,680
Speaker 3: So if anybody's like, wait a second, why is the

905
00:46:24,680 --> 00:46:26,680
Speaker 3: Scarlet Witch here, I'll be like, well, we're gonna play

906
00:46:26,680 --> 00:46:28,240
Speaker 3: Mark the Mercy later.

907
00:46:28,960 --> 00:46:32,000
Speaker 5: Will you sing defying gravity when your address is a

908
00:46:32,040 --> 00:46:35,120
Speaker 5: scarlet God? Come on, I remembered.

909
00:46:34,719 --> 00:46:38,680
Speaker 3: It that time to flying gravity, flying gravity, flying gravity.

910
00:46:38,920 --> 00:46:41,960
Speaker 5: I'll say, have you guys heard of deflying gravity? I

911
00:46:42,000 --> 00:46:44,600
Speaker 5: can play it on my drill dough and.

912
00:46:44,560 --> 00:46:49,799
Speaker 2: Then it's not. And I knew you were. Yes, I

913
00:46:49,880 --> 00:46:50,400
Speaker 2: knew you were.

914
00:46:54,320 --> 00:46:54,839
Speaker 5: I just.

915
00:46:57,480 --> 00:46:59,920
Speaker 2: So, and don't say, don't.

916
00:46:59,680 --> 00:47:05,200
Speaker 4: Say that's weird that Hawkeye is here because I'm Jeremy

917
00:47:05,320 --> 00:47:10,239
Speaker 4: runner off stage, like you start running, okay, and if

918
00:47:10,280 --> 00:47:12,920
Speaker 4: you do, please just don't please just run the street.

919
00:47:13,120 --> 00:47:14,160
Speaker 2: Please do so?

920
00:47:14,239 --> 00:47:17,759
Speaker 5: Can I ask a couple of questions? One, what what

921
00:47:18,000 --> 00:47:21,239
Speaker 5: happens after you tranquilize me and I fall down? The

922
00:47:21,320 --> 00:47:22,280
Speaker 5: lights go down?

923
00:47:24,360 --> 00:47:27,400
Speaker 2: I think the game will resume with you.

924
00:47:27,560 --> 00:47:30,640
Speaker 5: Still on the field because I fell off the stage

925
00:47:30,680 --> 00:47:31,480
Speaker 5: that you did.

926
00:47:31,719 --> 00:47:34,239
Speaker 3: I think the audience will at this point thirst for

927
00:47:34,320 --> 00:47:37,600
Speaker 3: blood and we will need to sat them in some way.

928
00:47:38,040 --> 00:47:41,760
Speaker 3: You're getting trampled by the giant NFL players is actually

929
00:47:41,800 --> 00:47:43,840
Speaker 3: going to be good for everybody.

930
00:47:43,400 --> 00:47:47,880
Speaker 5: Okay, Well for us, it's not. It wouldn't be my

931
00:47:47,960 --> 00:47:50,400
Speaker 5: first choice, but I can see how it makes sense.

932
00:47:50,760 --> 00:47:53,640
Speaker 4: What would be your first let's just let's let's establish

933
00:47:53,760 --> 00:47:54,560
Speaker 4: your first choice.

934
00:47:55,160 --> 00:47:57,400
Speaker 5: What would be your first Well, my first choice is

935
00:47:57,440 --> 00:48:02,040
Speaker 5: that my Matt Rife style riffing crowd work is it

936
00:48:02,280 --> 00:48:05,719
Speaker 5: kills and is a huge success.

937
00:48:05,800 --> 00:48:07,400
Speaker 2: Did we ever figure out what that was?

938
00:48:08,920 --> 00:48:13,240
Speaker 5: Hey? Guys, sometimes people ask me, why is a guy

939
00:48:13,280 --> 00:48:16,319
Speaker 5: who looks like a model doing stand up?

940
00:48:16,880 --> 00:48:18,480
Speaker 2: This is me, so I'm in the crowd.

941
00:48:18,840 --> 00:48:26,239
Speaker 5: Yeah, and my question to you and then and then,

942
00:48:26,920 --> 00:48:29,959
Speaker 5: but to answer your question of why somebody as hot

943
00:48:30,000 --> 00:48:36,200
Speaker 5: as me with this jaw is not a model and

944
00:48:36,360 --> 00:48:43,719
Speaker 5: is instead doing stand up, I've seen some shit. Read

945
00:48:43,760 --> 00:48:47,279
Speaker 5: my memoir, and then I go peace out and I

946
00:48:47,480 --> 00:48:50,000
Speaker 5: run off the stage before you can fucking shoot me

947
00:48:50,120 --> 00:48:52,919
Speaker 5: with your spear. How do you like that?

948
00:48:54,320 --> 00:48:58,280
Speaker 4: It's not before, it's it's as you run off stage

949
00:48:58,400 --> 00:49:00,279
Speaker 4: as I can shoot you with me.

950
00:49:00,400 --> 00:49:03,000
Speaker 1: He's shooting if he does miss. So we have two

951
00:49:03,040 --> 00:49:03,680
Speaker 1: fail staves.

952
00:49:03,680 --> 00:49:06,799
Speaker 3: We have hawk Eye and then in the in the

953
00:49:06,840 --> 00:49:09,200
Speaker 3: tunnel waiting for you is also hawk Tua, and.

954
00:49:09,160 --> 00:49:14,520
Speaker 1: She will spit a tranquilizing agent to your mouth. No

955
00:49:14,640 --> 00:49:17,160
Speaker 1: way you'll be and pubing from running, you know what

956
00:49:17,160 --> 00:49:17,520
Speaker 1: I mean?

957
00:49:17,680 --> 00:49:20,160
Speaker 5: And I will yeah, well you know the way.

958
00:49:20,000 --> 00:49:21,480
Speaker 1: You're going to end up unconscious.

959
00:49:21,480 --> 00:49:24,240
Speaker 3: And it's just a matter of basically where and whether

960
00:49:24,280 --> 00:49:28,680
Speaker 3: you want to be shot with an arrow sort of

961
00:49:28,800 --> 00:49:32,080
Speaker 3: noble or whether you want to get spit in your

962
00:49:32,080 --> 00:49:33,000
Speaker 3: mouth from hawk ta.

963
00:49:33,719 --> 00:49:41,360
Speaker 5: I'm not gonna every time that I start to build

964
00:49:41,400 --> 00:49:46,200
Speaker 5: my confidence with my great ideas for this show, I

965
00:49:46,239 --> 00:49:49,719
Speaker 5: feel like you, guys, go back to the part where

966
00:49:49,760 --> 00:49:52,279
Speaker 5: you break me down, and I just want you to

967
00:49:52,320 --> 00:49:54,520
Speaker 5: get to the part where you build me up. That's

968
00:49:54,560 --> 00:49:57,600
Speaker 5: what these kinds of seminars are supposed to be. You

969
00:49:57,640 --> 00:50:01,600
Speaker 5: break people down, you break their ego, you destroy all

970
00:50:01,640 --> 00:50:04,560
Speaker 5: of their self worth, and then you build them up

971
00:50:04,600 --> 00:50:09,520
Speaker 5: with a completely different personality that everyone hopes people will

972
00:50:09,640 --> 00:50:14,439
Speaker 5: like better. And when does that part start? Because this

973
00:50:14,520 --> 00:50:17,200
Speaker 5: is demoralizing.

974
00:50:16,440 --> 00:50:17,560
Speaker 2: Let's talk about like.

975
00:50:19,760 --> 00:50:26,960
Speaker 4: Other options, Okay, really celebrating like the new administration super

976
00:50:27,000 --> 00:50:30,799
Speaker 4: Bowl American as it gets, and we're giving the new

977
00:50:30,840 --> 00:50:33,640
Speaker 4: administration the benefit of the doubt, aren't we We're actually

978
00:50:33,680 --> 00:50:37,640
Speaker 4: giving them a chance to succeed instead of piling on

979
00:50:37,680 --> 00:50:40,360
Speaker 4: at the very beginning and being like not oh, I

980
00:50:40,360 --> 00:50:42,000
Speaker 4: don't like the first thing you did. I'm not even

981
00:50:42,040 --> 00:50:43,960
Speaker 4: gonna give you a chance to do another thing, not

982
00:50:44,040 --> 00:50:49,680
Speaker 4: letting them have one good day. So that really frosts

983
00:50:49,800 --> 00:50:50,520
Speaker 4: my ass.

984
00:50:50,560 --> 00:50:52,880
Speaker 3: When we won't let them have one good day, me

985
00:50:52,920 --> 00:50:55,640
Speaker 3: and Nate Silver gets so mad.

986
00:50:56,800 --> 00:51:00,879
Speaker 2: So what if when they do the flyover, right, it's

987
00:51:00,960 --> 00:51:02,360
Speaker 2: like thirty fives.

988
00:51:02,080 --> 00:51:06,080
Speaker 5: Or like the I'm gonna duck for cover when that happens,

989
00:51:06,400 --> 00:51:07,120
Speaker 5: You're gonna duck.

990
00:51:07,840 --> 00:51:10,600
Speaker 1: Okay, I don't work blue, but I'll tell you who does,

991
00:51:10,760 --> 00:51:11,480
Speaker 1: the Blue.

992
00:51:11,239 --> 00:51:12,719
Speaker 2: Angel Blue Angels.

993
00:51:13,560 --> 00:51:16,080
Speaker 4: Yes, that's right, you say that, and then the Blue

994
00:51:16,120 --> 00:51:18,080
Speaker 4: Angels fly over and they are fully.

995
00:51:17,800 --> 00:51:20,520
Speaker 5: Equipped and I hit the duck and cover my head.

996
00:51:21,960 --> 00:51:29,080
Speaker 4: Yeah, okay, yeah, And if you so like it is

997
00:51:29,120 --> 00:51:32,680
Speaker 4: an unfortunate vulnerability that like a lot has been invested

998
00:51:33,400 --> 00:51:37,160
Speaker 4: in in these you know, multi billion dollar machines, but

999
00:51:37,200 --> 00:51:40,839
Speaker 4: they they did not plan for ducking. So if you duck,

1000
00:51:40,880 --> 00:51:44,719
Speaker 4: it actually will probably save you. Like you're not You're like,

1001
00:51:44,760 --> 00:51:46,359
Speaker 4: you're not supposed to duck all.

1002
00:51:46,400 --> 00:51:49,759
Speaker 3: The target the sort of like, yeah, the crosshairs are

1003
00:51:49,800 --> 00:51:52,680
Speaker 3: always aligned for someone standing fully upright.

1004
00:51:52,560 --> 00:51:55,759
Speaker 5: Okay, So that's then I'll definitely be okay if I

1005
00:51:55,800 --> 00:51:56,120
Speaker 5: do that.

1006
00:51:56,239 --> 00:51:59,680
Speaker 4: So that actually probably will work. But but they're also

1007
00:52:00,640 --> 00:52:02,200
Speaker 4: well like most people in they duck. They like put

1008
00:52:02,200 --> 00:52:04,960
Speaker 4: their hands over their head, which you cannot do.

1009
00:52:05,239 --> 00:52:08,080
Speaker 1: Why not, you can't reach your own hand.

1010
00:52:08,120 --> 00:52:15,839
Speaker 5: Oh I'm not. I don't want to be in ship

1011
00:52:15,920 --> 00:52:16,880
Speaker 5: business anymore.

1012
00:52:18,440 --> 00:52:20,920
Speaker 2: By Hollywood Hamburg