WEBVTT - Remembering Shannen Doherty 0:00:00.120 --> 0:00:04.040 It's hard to do this episode. And you know, I'll 0:00:04.040 --> 0:00:05.680 even be honest, I didn't know if I should be 0:00:05.720 --> 0:00:08.400 here or not. Just have you guys talk. 0:00:12.440 --> 0:00:14.920 Yeah, we thought you should be with us, just because 0:00:15.000 --> 0:00:18.840 this is so hard for both of us and maybe 0:00:19.239 --> 0:00:20.440 you can help us out a little. 0:00:22.320 --> 0:00:24.239 You're a fan, You're a true, true fan. 0:00:24.440 --> 0:00:27.920 So yeah, it's like, you know, and I've been I've 0:00:27.960 --> 0:00:29.960 been lucky enough to get to work with Shannon for 0:00:30.000 --> 0:00:36.160 the last year, which some people know and some people don't. 0:00:37.520 --> 0:00:41.640 We couldn't. We can't do the show, this show, this podcast. 0:00:43.040 --> 0:00:45.839 If there was no Shannon, there's no nine O two one, oh, 0:00:46.080 --> 0:00:48.839 you know what I mean. And so it's like the 0:00:48.880 --> 0:00:51.120 thing that I knew is it's like I do want 0:00:51.159 --> 0:00:53.840 to keep watching the show, of course, but we couldn't 0:00:54.240 --> 0:00:59.040 just come back and start talking about, you know, the episode. 0:00:59.440 --> 0:01:01.360 This is so hard for everybody. We just have to 0:01:01.440 --> 0:01:02.959 kind of talk it out, and. 0:01:02.920 --> 0:01:05.600 It's like, we do want to keep watching. And the 0:01:05.640 --> 0:01:09.360 thing that I know from working with Shannon is she 0:01:09.440 --> 0:01:12.800 wants her podcast to continue, you know. So it's like 0:01:14.280 --> 0:01:19.240 we will recap the shows again, we will keep doing it, 0:01:20.160 --> 0:01:23.400 but for right now, we just you know, I want 0:01:23.400 --> 0:01:27.000 you guys to talk about how you're feeling, and also 0:01:27.120 --> 0:01:35.480 like honor Shannon with stories and memories, and they had 0:01:35.640 --> 0:01:40.520 such an important time together. I had a I went 0:01:40.560 --> 0:01:43.560 to dinner last night with some kids that are like 0:01:43.600 --> 0:01:46.400 in high school, right, and they're talking about the shows 0:01:46.400 --> 0:01:51.320 they're watching, and one of the dads was like, you 0:01:51.320 --> 0:01:53.840 guys should have watched nine O two one O, And 0:01:53.880 --> 0:02:01.160 it's like, yeah, they should. So I don't know. I mean, 0:02:01.200 --> 0:02:05.960 how are you guys doing, feeling what's coming to your 0:02:06.080 --> 0:02:08.720 minds to say? 0:02:08.840 --> 0:02:12.200 For me, I honestly, as you know, didn't want to 0:02:12.240 --> 0:02:20.200 do this. I just emotionally didn't feel ready. And I 0:02:20.240 --> 0:02:22.120 feel like I know a lot of people are speaking 0:02:22.160 --> 0:02:27.320 out and giving lovely tributes to her in her memory, 0:02:27.320 --> 0:02:31.880 but I just, oh, I obviously wanted to do this 0:02:31.960 --> 0:02:35.120 for the fans, so this episode is for them, not 0:02:35.280 --> 0:02:35.680 for us. 0:02:40.000 --> 0:02:42.400 How are you doing? How are you doing, Jenny? How 0:02:42.400 --> 0:02:44.800 are you doing? Tori? Like, what are you feeling? 0:02:52.960 --> 0:02:53.960 Not doing well? 0:02:58.880 --> 0:02:59.200 Oh? 0:03:00.280 --> 0:03:02.880 Do you feel like you're okay? It's like let it out. 0:03:03.000 --> 0:03:07.880 I mean, I think people were shocked, which seems like. 0:03:11.440 --> 0:03:14.360 It's crazy that we could be shocked knowing that she 0:03:14.560 --> 0:03:19.920 was sick and knowing how hard she was fighting, but 0:03:20.000 --> 0:03:21.560 it's still felt shocking. 0:03:24.639 --> 0:03:29.639 I guess it was just that belief that she fought 0:03:29.680 --> 0:03:33.280 so hard and was such a warrior and she has 0:03:33.320 --> 0:03:37.080 shown her entire life and career and you're everything that 0:03:37.120 --> 0:03:44.440 she can get past anything. So although we know answer 0:03:44.560 --> 0:03:49.600 is so evil and takes everyone that we love, it 0:03:49.800 --> 0:03:53.120 just I don't know. I guess she made you believe 0:03:53.160 --> 0:03:56.600 that she was the one that would make it and 0:03:57.560 --> 0:03:58.520 she was so hopeful. 0:03:59.640 --> 0:04:07.040 Yeah that's so true, because why I never thought that 0:04:07.280 --> 0:04:11.600 she would succumb to cancer, Like I just knowing what 0:04:11.640 --> 0:04:15.920 we know about her, and you know what a tough 0:04:16.920 --> 0:04:23.600 like fighter, strong, it just seems you're right, like I 0:04:23.640 --> 0:04:27.320 would never get her. And then when it did, it 0:04:27.360 --> 0:04:34.680 was just shocking and like makes you mad, makes you pissed, mad, sad, 0:04:34.880 --> 0:04:40.960 all the feelings because and then like what the h 0:04:41.839 --> 0:04:45.200 because she's the one person that you didn't I don't know, 0:04:45.480 --> 0:04:46.799 just didn't see this happening. 0:04:47.800 --> 0:04:51.280 Yeah, no, you're you're right. She had so much to 0:04:51.440 --> 0:04:57.960 say on her podcast that was really important, you know, 0:04:58.279 --> 0:05:04.159 like she was who she was. She was tough, tough cookie, right, 0:05:04.440 --> 0:05:07.880 and I admired it so much and she was having 0:05:07.920 --> 0:05:14.840 conversations and sharing things that a lot of people are 0:05:14.880 --> 0:05:19.040 really not willing to do, to put themselves out there 0:05:19.120 --> 0:05:23.440 in that way and be so vulnerable and so open 0:05:23.560 --> 0:05:28.839 and so real that it was really empowering what she 0:05:29.000 --> 0:05:34.640 was doing. And I just wish you could have kept 0:05:34.680 --> 0:05:38.440 doing that because I think it was it was helping people. 0:05:41.920 --> 0:05:45.000 A lot. It was helping people, I think, find their 0:05:45.040 --> 0:05:50.679 own strength within them by just hearing her story and 0:05:50.839 --> 0:05:53.919 hearing how she's found her strength. Like I feel like 0:05:53.960 --> 0:05:56.799 that was helping a lot of people suffering from cancer 0:05:57.640 --> 0:05:59.279 or dealing with cancer or whatever. 0:06:00.080 --> 0:06:05.120 And even like you know, my last text with Shannon 0:06:05.200 --> 0:06:09.320 were about Catherine Heigel. We had this really amazing interview 0:06:09.360 --> 0:06:14.520 she did with Catherine Heigel. It was great, and I'm 0:06:14.600 --> 0:06:18.320 so grateful. I'm so grateful to Catherine Heigel for doing it, 0:06:19.240 --> 0:06:21.920 you know, because Catherine doesn't do that that many interviews, 0:06:22.080 --> 0:06:25.840 and she really wanted to do it. And Shannon was 0:06:27.360 --> 0:06:34.279 so happy, isn't the right word, so motivated to have 0:06:34.320 --> 0:06:39.560 that conversation with two people who had, you know, really 0:06:40.320 --> 0:06:43.640 put themselves on the line, you know, like it or not, 0:06:43.880 --> 0:06:47.760 they really did for themselves and for other people. And 0:06:47.880 --> 0:06:51.520 so after the interview. It's a really great conversation they had, 0:06:52.200 --> 0:06:54.080 and so I just you know, texted with Shannon just 0:06:54.080 --> 0:06:57.640 to say, like how pumped I was about it. Like 0:06:57.720 --> 0:07:03.560 it really filled me with feelings that these two people 0:07:03.640 --> 0:07:07.599 who I admire got to have this great conversation and 0:07:07.880 --> 0:07:11.560 she was so happy about it. And she still, you know, Shannon, 0:07:11.520 --> 0:07:14.360 and I won't say this exact text, but she's so her, 0:07:14.600 --> 0:07:16.480 do you know what I mean? Like she really is 0:07:16.520 --> 0:07:23.080 authentically and so I just felt like she had so 0:07:23.160 --> 0:07:26.320 many more conversations like that to have. So that's sort 0:07:26.360 --> 0:07:29.440 of where I was at. Well. 0:07:29.480 --> 0:07:31.320 I think it's amazing in the last year that she 0:07:31.400 --> 0:07:35.560 was able to partner with you and do her podcast. 0:07:37.040 --> 0:07:39.560 And speaking, and that's why I wanted you guys, you know, 0:07:39.600 --> 0:07:43.000 and I did. I will say I pressured Torri and 0:07:43.080 --> 0:07:46.560 Jenny to get on with me today. They're not ready, 0:07:46.760 --> 0:07:55.840 but I felt like talking it's important, you know, like 0:08:00.360 --> 0:08:01.920 it is grieving together. 0:08:04.400 --> 0:08:08.040 And I guess everyone grieves in their own time. I 0:08:08.040 --> 0:08:12.640 think for me, the beauty of her nine to two 0:08:12.680 --> 0:08:18.560 and OHO fans specifically is even ones that I've been 0:08:18.600 --> 0:08:24.360 talking to on social media. There's one fan that's such 0:08:24.400 --> 0:08:26.800 a huge fan of the show, and she was saying, 0:08:26.880 --> 0:08:29.600 she's her friends are like it's been a week, you know, 0:08:30.080 --> 0:08:31.920 get out of the funk. You know, you only met 0:08:31.920 --> 0:08:35.080 her once. And she was like, she meant so much 0:08:35.120 --> 0:08:39.400 more to me than someone I met once. She was 0:08:39.440 --> 0:08:43.280 in my entire childhood and it's like losing a best 0:08:43.320 --> 0:08:47.840 friend from high school. And I think that's how people 0:08:47.920 --> 0:08:48.760 everywhere feel. 0:08:50.280 --> 0:08:55.920 Yeah, it's very sad, and it's also just so scary. 0:08:58.880 --> 0:09:01.839 Is that the word scary? It's like scary, Like, how 0:09:01.840 --> 0:09:05.000 does that happen? Sorry, Jenny, we're gonna say something. 0:09:05.440 --> 0:09:10.440 Yeah, I mean no, it is scary if someone that 0:09:10.480 --> 0:09:15.840 you look up to like that can cannot make it 0:09:15.920 --> 0:09:25.439 like it makes. It made me feel very fearful, especially 0:09:25.640 --> 0:09:30.200 just with Luke dying and now Shannon. I just feel 0:09:30.200 --> 0:09:36.040 like like, I don't know, I just it could be 0:09:36.559 --> 0:09:39.120 any of us could go at any moment that kind 0:09:39.160 --> 0:09:41.480 of feeling, which, yeah, that's scary. 0:09:42.760 --> 0:09:46.280 It's our my I'll just speak for myself. It's you know, 0:09:46.400 --> 0:09:50.080 a show that I just really impacted my seen and 0:09:50.200 --> 0:09:55.680 college years, right, and so for someone and a few 0:09:55.720 --> 0:10:02.920 people to be gone from that is scary. It's uncomfortable. 0:10:03.040 --> 0:10:09.920 It's worrisome. It's a bit too real for me, whereas 0:10:09.960 --> 0:10:12.400 like when I watched the show, it's just such a 0:10:12.880 --> 0:10:14.840 It's not even just like I'm watching the show. It's 0:10:14.880 --> 0:10:18.839 this part of my upbringing. So I watch it and 0:10:18.880 --> 0:10:21.160 I enjoy it, but I'm also it takes me right 0:10:21.200 --> 0:10:23.720 back to these my own memories. So it just makes 0:10:23.760 --> 0:10:26.679 it too real and it takes me out of this 0:10:26.920 --> 0:10:31.400 joy I have for this show. I don't know. 0:10:33.559 --> 0:10:37.760 Me, it doesn't I've spent my whole life living in fear, 0:10:38.600 --> 0:10:41.680 and I've always been a fearful person, and I didn't 0:10:41.720 --> 0:10:44.679 feel fear at all when she passed. 0:10:44.720 --> 0:10:45.280 I just. 0:10:47.679 --> 0:10:52.880 Felt sad. I felt sad for the second chapter she had, 0:10:54.679 --> 0:10:58.719 and I was so excited for that chapter for her 0:10:59.200 --> 0:11:03.440 and wanted her so badly to have that. 0:11:04.240 --> 0:11:08.400 M do you feel grateful for the time that you 0:11:08.480 --> 0:11:13.040 had recently? Like, I'm so glad Tori that you guys 0:11:13.480 --> 0:11:22.160 really had that conversation. I do. 0:11:22.480 --> 0:11:24.600 I do. I've had a lot of death in my life, 0:11:24.640 --> 0:11:27.319 and I don't believe in regrets, but I have a 0:11:27.360 --> 0:11:30.480 lot of regrets that I didn't have that time to 0:11:32.880 --> 0:11:40.280 have a second chance to get fast stuff from the 0:11:40.360 --> 0:11:45.559 past and look at all the good things and really 0:11:45.640 --> 0:11:46.840 talk it out and. 0:11:48.320 --> 0:11:48.600 I have. 0:11:50.480 --> 0:11:53.080 That last conversation, and I feel like she and I 0:11:53.160 --> 0:11:57.880 had that, and I'm super grateful for that. 0:12:00.640 --> 0:12:03.160 You know, I know that you're I don't want to 0:12:03.160 --> 0:12:04.439 put words in your mouth, but I know that you're 0:12:04.440 --> 0:12:09.280 glad you had time together at the recent con. 0:12:10.720 --> 0:12:12.280 Yeah, we got to see each other once in a while, 0:12:12.320 --> 0:12:14.120 but I was thinking definitely of you tour and. 0:12:16.000 --> 0:12:17.120 How h. 0:12:18.760 --> 0:12:20.480 Happy you must have been to have that time with 0:12:20.520 --> 0:12:26.080 her and and to have that sort of mm just 0:12:26.200 --> 0:12:30.480 reconnection on a on a deeper level as both of you, 0:12:30.480 --> 0:12:34.760 you know, matured and grown and learned so much that 0:12:35.000 --> 0:12:38.400 I was thinking of. You know, I wished that I 0:12:38.440 --> 0:12:40.640 had had that opportunity because I didn't really get to 0:12:40.679 --> 0:12:46.000 sit down and have like heartfelt conversation with her recently. 0:12:47.880 --> 0:12:50.200 But I was very glad that you. 0:12:50.120 --> 0:12:55.160 Did you as well, and I wish you had had 0:12:55.160 --> 0:12:56.440 that mm hmm. 0:12:57.520 --> 0:13:05.120 Yeah, you know, I'd love to hear, like I know, 0:13:05.320 --> 0:13:09.360 people listening, like, is there a memory or a story 0:13:09.880 --> 0:13:14.840 back from nine o two one oh that's come back 0:13:14.880 --> 0:13:18.160 into your mind? You know, I don't know. I haven't 0:13:18.160 --> 0:13:22.360 asked you guys that if there's something that you know that. 0:13:22.400 --> 0:13:31.480 You keep thinking about about Shannon seeing all the pictures too. 0:13:31.520 --> 0:13:35.720 I have to say, it's like, you're so lucky that 0:13:35.800 --> 0:13:42.920 you have those photos and you know, videotape of such 0:13:43.440 --> 0:13:44.640 cool things. 0:13:48.040 --> 0:13:50.680 It's interesting when I think about that when you say 0:13:50.679 --> 0:13:56.000 are there stories, and in my mind, like I'm replaying everything, 0:13:56.840 --> 0:14:02.960 it's all the memories, not on camera. It'd stay with me, 0:14:03.080 --> 0:14:04.280 not on camera. 0:14:11.400 --> 0:14:12.079 That's so true. 0:14:14.440 --> 0:14:16.760 But I like, I can see right now the very 0:14:16.800 --> 0:14:21.400 first scene Jen and Shannon and I had together at 0:14:21.880 --> 0:14:29.040 Marian Moore's party. Yeah, it was a night scene that house. 0:14:29.680 --> 0:14:35.480 M hm. That was our first scene together, I believe. 0:14:35.560 --> 0:14:39.320 So maybe there was one other thing, but that's the 0:14:39.360 --> 0:14:41.760 one that sticks out to me that was Maybe it 0:14:41.800 --> 0:14:44.840 wasn't our first scene, but it was the first time 0:14:44.960 --> 0:14:48.120 I remember the three of us really bonding and me 0:14:48.240 --> 0:14:52.240 thinking like, we're all gonna be friends like this, this 0:14:52.280 --> 0:14:54.680 is more than just being on camera. I was hopeful 0:14:54.720 --> 0:15:01.160 for like to fit in with you guys, and and 0:15:01.240 --> 0:15:06.040 you both were so accepting me. Yeah, I remember that night. 0:15:06.080 --> 0:15:08.040 It's just laughing. I mean, we filmed all night till 0:15:08.040 --> 0:15:13.960 the sun came up, which was a lot for teenagers, 0:15:14.000 --> 0:15:18.880 you know. It wasn't as adults. Like now we're like 0:15:19.200 --> 0:15:22.960 hardened to the process of like filming all night, we're 0:15:22.960 --> 0:15:27.320 just so used to it. Like back then, like it 0:15:27.360 --> 0:15:30.720 was a lot and they were exciting. Yeah, it was 0:15:31.000 --> 0:15:36.840 like a party. Yeah, yeah, minus the alcohol. 0:15:37.840 --> 0:15:41.400 Fun. It's almost fun when you think about I mean 0:15:41.520 --> 0:15:43.240 when I think about that for you guys, but also 0:15:43.360 --> 0:15:49.160 like that age, even working all night is fun. We 0:15:49.200 --> 0:15:52.800 need to like try to get that again, do you 0:15:52.880 --> 0:15:59.000 know what I mean, Like on the joy of that. 0:16:10.040 --> 0:16:15.640 I was remembering like there was times like after we 0:16:15.680 --> 0:16:23.120 stopped filming and I was newly divorced, I think, and 0:16:23.160 --> 0:16:26.680 she took a special interest to whoever I was dating. 0:16:26.840 --> 0:16:33.640 She wanted to meet them, basically vet them. I guess 0:16:33.680 --> 0:16:35.560 I didn't really see it at the time, and I 0:16:35.640 --> 0:16:40.160 was kind of like, okay, because you know, I don't 0:16:40.200 --> 0:16:44.920 think she really knew Peter that well, but she was. 0:16:45.120 --> 0:16:52.440 She We went to dinner with two of my quote 0:16:52.480 --> 0:16:56.960 unquote boyfriends during that weird time, and I just remember 0:16:57.080 --> 0:17:00.640 her just really truly checking them out from across the 0:17:00.680 --> 0:17:05.280 table and assessing them. And then I would be like, 0:17:05.280 --> 0:17:06.160 what do you think. 0:17:07.520 --> 0:17:11.760 And she would tell me, M, yeah, I mean I 0:17:11.840 --> 0:17:16.600 think that's what you're saying. In my you know, limited 0:17:16.640 --> 0:17:19.600 experience with her in the last year, she's quite brilliant. 0:17:19.720 --> 0:17:27.000 Like she really was very talented producer, and she could 0:17:27.080 --> 0:17:31.320 sit down at the microphone, open it up and just 0:17:31.520 --> 0:17:35.520 talk and that our team that you know is listening, 0:17:35.680 --> 0:17:38.800 is just hanging on every word. She really was an 0:17:38.840 --> 0:17:45.359 amazingly beautiful storyteller in this medium, you know what I mean. Like, 0:17:47.040 --> 0:17:49.639 I think I wish she found it sooner because I 0:17:49.680 --> 0:17:56.000 think she was so suited to just talking storytelling so articulate. 0:17:56.560 --> 0:17:59.360 Yeah, And I think maybe that's a side of her 0:17:59.440 --> 0:18:02.720 that I ever knew as a teenager in my twenties. 0:18:02.760 --> 0:18:06.960 I mean, I knew she was smart and funny and 0:18:06.960 --> 0:18:11.160 and authentic and honest about everything, but I don't think 0:18:11.200 --> 0:18:15.199 it was until her podcast and also to be honest, 0:18:15.280 --> 0:18:18.320 doing like these conventions, doing the cons where she would 0:18:18.960 --> 0:18:21.680 she was just so smart about business. 0:18:22.280 --> 0:18:24.640 Like when you guys would be out at those cons 0:18:24.720 --> 0:18:27.679 and fans would get to be with her, what was 0:18:27.720 --> 0:18:31.800 that like, Like do they just react to her? 0:18:32.840 --> 0:18:35.919 They do. I mean, I think they react to everyone 0:18:35.960 --> 0:18:42.040 on my on tono, But I think maybe she stood 0:18:42.080 --> 0:18:45.760 for something else to them, Yeah, than we all did, 0:18:45.800 --> 0:18:50.520 Like she was not just you know, their childhood friend 0:18:50.640 --> 0:18:53.439 that they had grown up watching, but she was someone 0:18:53.520 --> 0:18:55.520 so strong and such a fighter and going through so 0:18:55.600 --> 0:18:58.800 much that on some level they could relate to her. 0:18:58.920 --> 0:19:02.600 Whether it was a relative they had or a friend 0:19:02.800 --> 0:19:05.639 that was going through it, or them or they themselves 0:19:05.720 --> 0:19:08.000 was going they were going through a hard time, or 0:19:08.040 --> 0:19:12.080 a students she was that person for them, that mentor 0:19:12.280 --> 0:19:13.600 to look up to to keep going. 0:19:14.320 --> 0:19:17.120 Think about that standing ovation. Were you both there for that? Yeah, 0:19:17.160 --> 0:19:20.560 when she came out, what a moment. There was so 0:19:20.640 --> 0:19:21.480 much more. 0:19:23.280 --> 0:19:26.440 In that and that was hard for her to take, 0:19:26.560 --> 0:19:29.840 which that surprised me that day on stage because she 0:19:31.840 --> 0:19:34.720 was so good with everyone and so you know, she 0:19:34.800 --> 0:19:38.000 never got nervous. She never going on stage never bothered her. 0:19:38.960 --> 0:19:40.800 I don't think I ever saw her get nervous about 0:19:40.800 --> 0:19:48.679 anything other than her fight cancer. But like, and I 0:19:48.680 --> 0:19:50.720 could see in her face like she was just so 0:19:53.600 --> 0:19:59.600 moved and it took a lot for her to show feelings. 0:19:59.760 --> 0:20:03.280 You know, that meant a lot to her. 0:20:04.080 --> 0:20:10.280 Yeah, she was definitely overcome with everybody's love for her, 0:20:10.720 --> 0:20:16.480 for sure. I mean just think about like where all 0:20:16.560 --> 0:20:18.919 the things that she'd been through as far as like 0:20:20.200 --> 0:20:25.080 fans loving or hating her and all. You know, she's 0:20:25.160 --> 0:20:27.560 been on the other side of that, so to feel 0:20:27.640 --> 0:20:34.600 that kind of love from her fans, I'm sure that 0:20:34.800 --> 0:20:39.480 was just like medicine for her heart, you. 0:20:39.359 --> 0:20:46.760 Know, overwhelming. All it's overwhelming. I mean, it's very It's 0:20:46.760 --> 0:20:50.280 been so beautiful to see. I mean even like on 0:20:50.320 --> 0:20:53.679 my Instagram, my entire whatever it's called for you age 0:20:53.880 --> 0:20:59.320 is just so much shamnon right, And it's like I 0:20:59.359 --> 0:21:05.240 got a lot of calls. People were very impacted by 0:21:05.359 --> 0:21:07.680 her their whole life, do you know what I'm saying, 0:21:08.280 --> 0:21:11.679 Like through nine o two one, oh, of course, but 0:21:11.760 --> 0:21:14.920 then she was so public about her battle and I 0:21:14.960 --> 0:21:21.119 think it connected her with people. So I do feel 0:21:21.160 --> 0:21:23.480 like your friend Torri that you were talking about, who 0:21:23.600 --> 0:21:26.960 even just met her once, Like, yeah, I get it. 0:21:27.800 --> 0:21:31.040 It impacted that person very deeply. 0:21:33.280 --> 0:21:33.800 It's true. 0:21:34.000 --> 0:21:39.400 I keep going back to her podcast page on Instagram 0:21:39.600 --> 0:21:48.280 and is it the pinned one, the on camera right, 0:21:49.520 --> 0:21:52.080 it's depended one. I think the episode where she's talking 0:21:52.080 --> 0:21:57.440 about she's starting a new treatment and or she says 0:21:57.480 --> 0:22:02.880 she feels hopeful, and I just keep I find myself 0:22:03.119 --> 0:22:07.880 going and just rewatching that probably far too many times 0:22:07.880 --> 0:22:08.680 than I should a day. 0:22:08.720 --> 0:22:20.080 But it's yeah, yeah, I mean she was working non stop. Yeah, 0:22:21.600 --> 0:22:25.119 and she liked it, you know, I can she wanted to. 0:22:25.880 --> 0:22:28.480 But to have that strength, I know that, I I 0:22:28.480 --> 0:22:32.320 mean I couldn't like. I admire it so much because 0:22:32.359 --> 0:22:35.080 it's like wow, to have that inner strength, to just 0:22:35.320 --> 0:22:38.040 be able to be working even if you don't feel good, 0:22:38.359 --> 0:22:42.000 is like unbelievable, and I think about so many people 0:22:42.480 --> 0:22:48.560 that do that. I frankly don't actually know how she 0:22:48.760 --> 0:22:54.600 did it because it's so unbelievable, and it does make 0:22:54.760 --> 0:22:58.800 me want to be like that, you know what I mean, 0:22:59.600 --> 0:23:05.879 like be a little tougher, be a little stronger. And 0:23:05.920 --> 0:23:12.439 also I feel very feel, very responsible to continue what 0:23:12.640 --> 0:23:14.879 she was doing. I think it's why I wanted you 0:23:14.880 --> 0:23:19.760 guys to come on today talk about it, because I 0:23:19.800 --> 0:23:27.800 continue to fight for what she was so passionate about. 0:23:29.640 --> 0:23:34.480 You know, have these amazing doctors and these amazing people 0:23:34.520 --> 0:23:41.200 and these amazing advocates share their stories. Because she was unfinished. 0:23:41.240 --> 0:23:44.240 That was sort of work I think is so hard. 0:23:44.440 --> 0:23:47.239 Is like her work was not done, and so I 0:23:47.280 --> 0:23:50.080 do feel like it's on you, it's on me, It's 0:23:50.119 --> 0:23:53.040 on us, it's on all of us listening to continue that. 0:23:53.080 --> 0:23:55.320 I've been so touched by the people that are like, 0:23:55.400 --> 0:23:59.320 please don't turn this Instagram off, her Instagram, her show Instagram, 0:23:59.760 --> 0:24:04.480 or her show because the message is so important. So, 0:24:06.320 --> 0:24:09.240 you know, I think that's why I wanted you guys 0:24:09.320 --> 0:24:11.280 to come on. It's just to say how you're feeling, 0:24:11.640 --> 0:24:16.080 so that other people know that what they're feeling is okay. 0:24:18.160 --> 0:24:24.240 Yeah, I think that in general, I think everybody should 0:24:24.440 --> 0:24:29.920 feel you know. I feel like I got so much 0:24:29.960 --> 0:24:34.000 strength from just knowing her as a young girl, growing 0:24:34.080 --> 0:24:37.160 up beside her for the years that I did, and 0:24:38.040 --> 0:24:40.400 I learned a lot, you know, about how to stand 0:24:40.480 --> 0:24:42.200 up for myself, how to fight for things that I 0:24:42.280 --> 0:24:51.360 believed in, and I saw I saw at times that 0:24:54.000 --> 0:24:58.439 not work in her benefit from other people's perspectives. But 0:24:58.560 --> 0:25:02.000 I also saw that she was saying what she needed 0:25:02.000 --> 0:25:06.200 to say, and I thought, I want to be like that. 0:25:06.359 --> 0:25:09.719 I want to be a person that use my voice 0:25:10.080 --> 0:25:18.560 and says what I need to say. And so she 0:25:18.640 --> 0:25:22.040 did inspire me in that is in one way that 0:25:22.080 --> 0:25:22.800 she inspired me. 0:25:25.920 --> 0:25:29.760 Yes, I think people looking back, she got such a 0:25:29.760 --> 0:25:33.880 hard time at the time, and looking back, it's one 0:25:33.880 --> 0:25:37.840 of the things that's the most spectacular about her, which 0:25:37.880 --> 0:25:43.560 is so such is life, right, and that people now 0:25:44.440 --> 0:25:52.480 so admire her for that almost like we need to 0:25:52.600 --> 0:25:54.000 learn from that, you know. 0:25:54.119 --> 0:25:59.160 Yeah, it was a different time m hm. To Jen's point, 0:25:59.240 --> 0:26:05.320 I feel the same way, except I didn't put it 0:26:05.359 --> 0:26:10.200 into action. Like she would always encourage me to use 0:26:10.240 --> 0:26:16.639 my voice and I didn't. You can and you do 0:26:16.800 --> 0:26:21.480 now and that yeah, in the last year. That's something 0:26:22.960 --> 0:26:26.679 that it was nice to be encourage that when I 0:26:26.720 --> 0:26:28.800 was young, but I was too young and in the 0:26:28.840 --> 0:26:31.640 middle of it to understand my worth to do that. 0:26:32.400 --> 0:26:35.879 And it was nice to hear her tell me that 0:26:35.960 --> 0:26:39.720 as an adult and be like I can't. I can't. 0:26:39.960 --> 0:26:44.680 And but when she's like, you can, and I heard 0:26:44.680 --> 0:26:47.399 it this time, I'm grateful. 0:26:47.040 --> 0:26:47.360 For that. 0:26:49.000 --> 0:26:49.520 And I will. 0:26:50.560 --> 0:26:57.120 Yeah. That's yeah, you should because you honor that way. 0:26:58.720 --> 0:27:03.879 Totally. Yeah, she's going to be looking down on you 0:27:03.960 --> 0:27:07.199 and so proud of every moment that you stand up 0:27:07.240 --> 0:27:10.760 for yourself and use your voice. I can just see 0:27:10.800 --> 0:27:14.080 her applauding you, just loving it. 0:27:16.160 --> 0:27:23.840 Yeah, you know, I I realize also how hard it 0:27:23.920 --> 0:27:27.160 must have been for you guys when you lost Luke 0:27:27.200 --> 0:27:31.680 Perry I didn't realize it at the time, but now 0:27:31.720 --> 0:27:35.960 I realize. I mean, that must have just been no 0:27:36.040 --> 0:27:38.639 words and then for you to go through it again 0:27:40.920 --> 0:27:44.080 so soon. You know, I'm really sorry, Like I know 0:27:44.200 --> 0:27:47.280 that I wish I had better words because I know 0:27:47.520 --> 0:27:53.320 both of you. It's very hard. It's a piece of. 0:27:53.280 --> 0:27:57.720 You, Yeah, it is. 0:27:58.200 --> 0:28:02.879 It's like a piece of your found that y'all never 0:28:03.160 --> 0:28:06.560 no one will ever really understand unless they were there 0:28:06.560 --> 0:28:09.320 with us then they went through the experience with us. 0:28:12.040 --> 0:28:15.120 It's it's kind of hard to for me. It's kind 0:28:15.119 --> 0:28:21.360 of hard to believe that other people understand that connection. 0:28:22.280 --> 0:28:24.880 I know for you tour, you guys spend a lot 0:28:24.920 --> 0:28:29.840 more time with each other like as friends like in 0:28:29.880 --> 0:28:36.600 the real world. And I know I've just been thinking 0:28:36.640 --> 0:28:39.840 a lot about you and your loss and sending you 0:28:39.880 --> 0:28:43.880 a lot of hugs you too. 0:28:45.760 --> 0:28:47.560 Yeah, Jen and I have talked a lot over the 0:28:47.640 --> 0:28:55.040 years that the connection hm that we all had, it's 0:28:55.160 --> 0:28:59.400 just we always do say it's something no one can 0:28:59.480 --> 0:29:00.400 quite underst stand. 0:29:03.400 --> 0:29:03.880 It was. 0:29:06.680 --> 0:29:07.360 So unique. 0:29:18.000 --> 0:29:19.800 How do you feel about going? I know you guys 0:29:19.800 --> 0:29:23.520 have a strip coming up, right, Like, isn't there a 0:29:23.520 --> 0:29:27.040 a con a reunion sort of soon? Is there one soon? 0:29:29.080 --> 0:29:30.480 Do you want to go? 0:29:30.800 --> 0:29:34.640 Do you want to I don't want to go. I 0:29:34.680 --> 0:29:37.680 don't want to go. I mean just for the far 0:29:37.840 --> 0:29:47.880 like absence of her there. I think though there's part 0:29:47.920 --> 0:29:50.320 of me that does want to go to try to 0:29:50.360 --> 0:30:00.520 like give our fans are her fans specifically, just some love, 0:30:00.920 --> 0:30:08.880 just some connection from you know us that that's who 0:30:08.880 --> 0:30:12.800