Speaker 1: The Nicky Glazer Podcast. Nicker, here's Nikki. Hello here, I
Speaker 1: am welcome to the show. It's the Nicky Glazer Podcast.
Speaker 1: I'm just gonna make sure all these video cameras are recording,
Speaker 1: because I yet I did it. That's a d D
Speaker 1: for you. You think you did something and then you
Speaker 1: convince yourself you didn't do it. If you didn't know,
Speaker 1: we're on YouTube, you can watch the show and check
Speaker 1: out what we're wearing, what we're not wearing, how much
Speaker 1: my face looks tired, Like you can predict how long
Speaker 1: ago it was since I got up, um, things like that.
Speaker 1: Today I'm doing pretty good. I got up super early
Speaker 1: because I was like so sad yesterday. What's going on
Speaker 1: with your day today? Because we have to record a
Speaker 1: little bit earlier than usual. Yeah, so we had to
Speaker 1: get record early today. So like, just to be completely honest,
Speaker 1: not that it's like we would ever hide this. I
Speaker 1: don't know why I'm acting like it would be some
Speaker 1: secret that we're girls. Transferent, it is the day of
Speaker 1: still on your Marina is here? Is here? Hi? Hi? Um?
Speaker 1: It's eight in the morning or eight fifty four in
Speaker 1: the morning, to be exact. I just never want to
Speaker 1: lie to you guys. Um Central time zone? Noah, is
Speaker 1: it six fifty four where you are? Okay? I never
Speaker 1: know what Arizona does. I know they don't budge. That's
Speaker 1: all I know. Okay, cool? Well does that mean then
Speaker 1: that it's getting like since you guys don't do daylight
Speaker 1: saving not savings saving? Like this morning? Did you know
Speaker 1: that you can find out when the sun rises and sets?
Speaker 1: Do you know how? The quickest way to find that
Speaker 1: out your finger in your butt? Yes it is. It
Speaker 1: is a sun dial It's an indoor sun dial. Um.
Speaker 1: The quickest way, which I didn't know, is to pull
Speaker 1: up your weather app on your iPhone and it just
Speaker 1: says it. It will always say it on there, like
Speaker 1: you know how you like roll through the day, and
Speaker 1: it'll always say And it's really interesting to pay attention
Speaker 1: to do it, which I always do because I go running.
Speaker 1: I always wait to run till the last second, and
Speaker 1: I don't like to run too much after nightfall. Um
Speaker 1: knocked full and so um. But this morning I got
Speaker 1: up because I wanted to go for a run in
Speaker 1: the park early, but the sun didn't rise until seven eighteen.
Speaker 1: I got up at seven. It was pitch dark outside.
Speaker 1: Still is it? Is it dark at seven there? No? Yes,
Speaker 1: So now it gets the I think the sun comes
Speaker 1: out like it's seven twenty. Yeah, that's bullshit. That's two.
Speaker 1: And then the sun sets. If the sun is gonna
Speaker 1: set sooner, it should come up sooner too. I thought
Speaker 1: that was the whole idea, not never up early enough
Speaker 1: to know that it's not coming up too soon. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it's crazy. So I should file a complaint I know
Speaker 1: it with his god mother mother n mother mother Nate. Um. So, yeah,
Speaker 1: we're recording early because I have to, baby said, I
Speaker 1: don't have to get to babysit my niece and nephew,
Speaker 1: not Forest, he's the youngest one. Did you guys see
Speaker 1: the video I posted a Forest on my real on Instagram. Yeah,
Speaker 1: because if I was just filming Poppy and Arlowe fighting
Speaker 1: over some toy and my dad going give her a chance,
Speaker 1: you got to see that family dynamic that we talked
Speaker 1: about yesterday. Off my dad just like kind of muttering
Speaker 1: something that's already clear what's happening, And then and then
Speaker 1: you see me like kind of notice I'm filming them,
Speaker 1: and then you see me notice, uh, Forest crawls into
Speaker 1: the kitchen and I go Hi Crawley, which I was
Speaker 1: thinking of Claire Crawley from the Bachelorette. He looks like that, No,
Speaker 1: it was just he was crawling, So I go Hi Crawley,
Speaker 1: and then I zoom over the camera and I just
Speaker 1: think it's gonna be him crawling, and then which it is,
Speaker 1: but he just looks up and he already has a
Speaker 1: smile on his face, and it's so freaking cute. I
Speaker 1: can't stop watching it. I feel like I'm turning into
Speaker 1: one of those people that is like thinks they're nephews
Speaker 1: and nieces or their own kids are like cuter than
Speaker 1: the rest. And then you post and you're like this
Speaker 1: is kind of a not great. Like there's this some
Speaker 1: I won't name who, but there's this comedian right now
Speaker 1: that Chris and I are obsessed with. An You was
Speaker 1: over at my house the other night with all the
Speaker 1: girls and we made her and Kursten everyone watched this
Speaker 1: show and like like forced this like weird sketch show
Speaker 1: upon them and I love it so much. And then
Speaker 1: you watched this. I also I wanted to watch everything
Speaker 1: this person had done. And then I was watching some
Speaker 1: late night appearances that they had done and they were
Speaker 1: just like, my daughter is really funny too, And then
Speaker 1: they played a video of their daughter and it was
Speaker 1: just like crickets, Like it was just not funny and
Speaker 1: not that cute or anything, and it was just there
Speaker 1: was one video, like he did it on two different shows,
Speaker 1: and there was one where I was like, Okay, I
Speaker 1: see something. The other one I was like, this is awkward,
Speaker 1: Like everyone has to pretend this kid's cute. So I
Speaker 1: kind of felt like that with the forest thing. But
Speaker 1: it's just I keep watching it. It It makes me feel
Speaker 1: so good. So I guess he's in daycare. And then
Speaker 1: I love his old man's sweater in that video. Yeah
Speaker 1: it is. It's from old Navy too. Um it looks
Speaker 1: like it's made of wood. Yeah, so cute. Doesn't look
Speaker 1: that cozy for a little baby to wear like thick sweater.
Speaker 1: You maybe were on the show alone. Um, so are
Speaker 1: the kids, Yes, Matt, My brother in law's going to
Speaker 1: drop them off at ten and so, and they're very excited.
Speaker 1: And I'm like, temper that kids, because I don't need
Speaker 1: a sitter or is this like an experiment or what? No,
Speaker 1: they need one because my parents aren't available to do it.
Speaker 1: And there is this new thing where like, I don't know,
Speaker 1: Chris and I both are experiencing this with our nieces
Speaker 1: and nephews. They don't have babysitters. Everyone just relies on
Speaker 1: moms and dads and there's no what happened to babysitters?
Speaker 1: And the parents village, Well, the parents go, well, my
Speaker 1: kids are just gonna freak out if there's a babysitter. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it's scary the first time your parents leave you with
Speaker 1: a stranger, it's scary. But I was getting left with
Speaker 1: babysitters when I was three two three, like from the
Speaker 1: get go, And I just think that. I'm sure people
Speaker 1: listening relate like, either you're being called upon to watch
Speaker 1: kids and you don't get paid by the way, family
Speaker 1: doesn't get paid, and we wouldn't want to be like,
Speaker 1: I don't want to be compensated. But what happened to babysitters?
Speaker 1: There's this new thing of like, and my mom goes,
Speaker 1: we don't know, Lauren doesn't know how to find one,
Speaker 1: And I go, how did you find one? In there's apps?
Speaker 1: Now there's there was just the white pages, the yeah,
Speaker 1: there was nothing then there was just word of mouth
Speaker 1: from your neighbor down the street who like knew some
Speaker 1: pedophile that like offered their services. Now it's Linda. Now
Speaker 1: everything has been you know, there's references, there's apps, there's services,
Speaker 1: there's so many babysitters and you know, I know cost
Speaker 1: is one thing of it, but um, I always just say,
Speaker 1: like what if what if they didn't have it? Like
Speaker 1: what would they do? What if they didn't have my parents?
Speaker 1: So I'm happy to do it, but um so I'm babysitting,
Speaker 1: which is what I did for most of my life
Speaker 1: before comedy took over. That's all I did for a job.
Speaker 1: I did a little temping here and there. But I
Speaker 1: was mainly a babysitter when I was living in l
Speaker 1: A and all through high school and like, um not
Speaker 1: during college but after college. And I hated it so much.
Speaker 1: I hated it. Did you guys babysit? Yes? My next
Speaker 1: door neighbor showed me his little wiener. I just remember
Speaker 1: being like eleven and watching him and he was like,
Speaker 1: this is my penis. And I was traumatized because he
Speaker 1: was only like two years younger than me. I think, like,
Speaker 1: why am I baby? Like why is a ten year
Speaker 1: old babysitting in eight year old that check out that
Speaker 1: gets into some murky territory. He actually went to jail
Speaker 1: for robbery and maybe rape. I'm not even joking. Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah, okay,
Speaker 1: well not my him and his family a lot of luck,
Speaker 1: unfortunate circumstances. Yeah, whatever happened that day with Anya definitely
Speaker 1: traumatized in the rest of his life. My babysat my
Speaker 1: sister's best friend, who is still a very good friend,
Speaker 1: and I think I did a good job with her.
Speaker 1: Her parents were very strict. She was an only child.
Speaker 1: She had to play cello all the time, and I
Speaker 1: just let her do anything because she was a crazy
Speaker 1: only child that like the second her parents. Her parents
Speaker 1: were like, don't dune, dune, dune, I don't know no like,
Speaker 1: and she just went completely one eight the other way.
Speaker 1: She's so cool and arrested for burglary and pressbal rape.
Speaker 1: All her kids have like long hair, they're all beach kids.
Speaker 1: She consciously decided to be the opposite. But I remember
Speaker 1: just yeah, I let her eat anything she wanted. We
Speaker 1: just had so much fun. It was great. Yeah, when
Speaker 1: it comes to like my niece and nephew. I want
Speaker 1: them to be the best people that they can grow into,
Speaker 1: and I know that I'm gonna like be around there
Speaker 1: them a long time, so I don't want to either
Speaker 1: be a boring aunt or an aunt that just lets
Speaker 1: the watch TV, because I just want to have their
Speaker 1: minds be as pliable and uh, you know, stimulated as possible.
Speaker 1: But at the same time, TV is not that bad
Speaker 1: and it is such a nice thing to be able
Speaker 1: to have when your baby saying I used to always
Speaker 1: let kids watch TV so much. There's only so much
Speaker 1: you can do with them. I'm looking for things to do.
Speaker 1: I was thinking of going to Target and saying, you
Speaker 1: can have any toy in the entire building. You get
Speaker 1: to pick out one toy. Because kids have, at their
Speaker 1: their age five and three, no concept of money, right,
Speaker 1: so they're not if I was, if you're seven, you go, okay,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna get the most expensive thing. I know where
Speaker 1: to go the electronics where things are locked up. But
Speaker 1: Arlo and Poppy, they're gonna just to have any to
Speaker 1: get to choose anything. They're gonna pick just something. Yeah,
Speaker 1: They're they're gonna pick something either big that is probably cheap,
Speaker 1: or like a ball or something, or like a little
Speaker 1: like Barbie doll, and barbies are cheap, so I think
Speaker 1: that's gonna be a fun thing. I know that that's
Speaker 1: like spoiling them she because you can be able to
Speaker 1: decide what they want and they know. But I want
Speaker 1: to do up time, man, like I want. I'd love
Speaker 1: to stay in target for like two hours. That would
Speaker 1: be nice for me because you've got a four hour
Speaker 1: countdown four hour And speaking of countdowns, that's all you
Speaker 1: do when you're babysitting is look at the fucking clock.
Speaker 1: I was just reminisced of that. I was like, oh
Speaker 1: my god, I know today is going to be clockwatch.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna be like NASA or you know, New Year's
Speaker 1: Eve Dick Clark, just constantly watching that clock because like
Speaker 1: in high school, teachers are probably like, what the funk
Speaker 1: am I going to do today? I mean they but
Speaker 1: they have our chunks that they got to fill and
Speaker 1: they have lesson plans. I think for kids, I'm just
Speaker 1: gonna watch put on Pokemon and watch Alow likes to
Speaker 1: watch autistic men draw Pokemon. I just I just guess
Speaker 1: that they're autistic, because then just you just see their
Speaker 1: hand and they just draw Pokemon. It's kind of sped up.
Speaker 1: It's very it is like very soothing and fascinating. So
Speaker 1: I'll probably put on that. Um. Also, there's this new
Speaker 1: show called Bluey. It's not new, but it's been around
Speaker 1: a while. It's called Bluey, and it's about a dog
Speaker 1: and his family, and people that don't have kids are
Speaker 1: obsessed with it. Like adults are like really loving Bluey.
Speaker 1: I've read something about it recently and some you know,
Speaker 1: with Vulture or something like that, and I am someone
Speaker 1: that was like in eighth grade, I was really into
Speaker 1: Blues Clues. I don't know why. I just loved it.
Speaker 1: I thought it was adorable. It was soothing to me.
Speaker 1: So I think I'm really gonna get into the show
Speaker 1: Bluey because if adults already are on board with it
Speaker 1: and it it's not like they have adult jokes in
Speaker 1: it that they're like nodding at adults. There are certain
Speaker 1: shows like that, like The Fairly Odd Parents I remember
Speaker 1: that used to have a lot of jokes, SpongeBob obviously,
Speaker 1: Peewee's Playhouse. But Bluey. If you're into Bluey, let me know,
Speaker 1: because I really I'm going to check it out today.
Speaker 1: So maybe what about Rachel, that woman that Sara Lena
Speaker 1: has been watching a lot of She's all over the
Speaker 1: place now she's like, blew up, Okay the Rachel on
Speaker 1: YouTube ms Rachel something like that. Yeah, she certainly in
Speaker 1: the sentis clips And I was not even about to
Speaker 1: watch that. I was like, I can't. I assume it's
Speaker 1: a woman with a high pitched voice that's counting things.
Speaker 1: Now we're going to count to ten. Nikki, what do
Speaker 1: you think a little could be? There's like, if all
Speaker 1: else fails, you could just make videos for kids. That's
Speaker 1: what I think. Sometimes it's like, if all else fails,
Speaker 1: I can just be like in front of a camera
Speaker 1: going like one, two, three popsicles. I mean, isn't that
Speaker 1: just Instagram? Hi, guys, I'm just gonna play a couple
Speaker 1: of songs for you now. I feel that where wait,
Speaker 1: who are you following? I'm just doing my own story,
Speaker 1: my live me on live. I'm doing a Patreon show tonight.
Speaker 1: And then I thought maybe I'll do an Instagram live
Speaker 1: while I'm doing it and try to some new people. Yes, absolutely,
Speaker 1: you have to be that like your music. If they're bored,
Speaker 1: they'll tune into the Instagram live. If they don't want
Speaker 1: to watch it, they'll leave. It's not it's so low
Speaker 1: presh and I'll just like live stream BLUEI in the
Speaker 1: background just in case. Here's here's the ticket. Cover up
Speaker 1: the number at the top. Put a little piece of
Speaker 1: tape on the top of your phone, because you will
Speaker 1: if you can see the number, you'll be obsessed with
Speaker 1: it and you'll be like, only people, only thirty two people.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, I just lost after that song. I
Speaker 1: lost fifteen people. It's like if you remove the number,
Speaker 1: it does not matter, and you can go and then
Speaker 1: you cancel a lot of it and you don't even
Speaker 1: know and it's beautiful. And don't read the comments because
Speaker 1: then I'll be like, oh, I gotta answer that person
Speaker 1: in Kansas that's asking about X. Yeah. I just let
Speaker 1: the comments go. They start talking to themselves, like and
Speaker 1: you can't sing your own le ricks. It's hard to
Speaker 1: look at lyrics. It's hard to read comments and also
Speaker 1: sing um. I'm too busy looking at the guitar neck anyway,
Speaker 1: so that won't be my problem, right because you're all
Speaker 1: over the neck. I just play I just you don't
Speaker 1: capo as much. You'll go down the neck and like
Speaker 1: figure out how to do that? Really, you stay in
Speaker 1: one area. That's maybe the smarter way just makes it
Speaker 1: so it's simple chord shapes in one area and you're
Speaker 1: going and it's just like, well I would have to
Speaker 1: look at the neck too. It's so confusing. Um. So
Speaker 1: I'm gonna hang out with the kids today and then
Speaker 1: I have a lasic appointment to see if I'm too
Speaker 1: old to do that. Um, and that'll be exciting. I'm
Speaker 1: trying to just get my all my ducks in a row,
Speaker 1: freeze my eggs, um, laser my eyes. Maybe they could
Speaker 1: reverse that. Freeze your eyes. And do you ever think
Speaker 1: about I just i'm far sited or whatever it's called.
Speaker 1: Where you need readers? Oh yeah, and that just started.
Speaker 1: But before that, you never had bad vision? No, God,
Speaker 1: how do people have good vision? Do your parents have
Speaker 1: good vision? Did you grow up with parents who needed glasses? Yeah?
Speaker 1: And the everyone had good vision. That's the one genetic,
Speaker 1: genetically great thing I have. Everything else is like strap
Speaker 1: throat and smoke grows long. Well, I think one of
Speaker 1: them is caused by something. But my parents, Wait, what
Speaker 1: do you have bad vision in your family. Yeah, well
Speaker 1: my dad surprisingly still has good vision, but everyone else
Speaker 1: and my sister has good vision, that bitch. But yeah,
Speaker 1: I would love to do lasic. But like I stuff
Speaker 1: really just creeps me out. So you don't wear contact lenses.
Speaker 1: I do, I can do contact. How can you do
Speaker 1: that if I stuff creeps you out? I mean that's
Speaker 1: that For people with I stuff, they're like, I can't
Speaker 1: put my finger in my eye. Well, for me, it's
Speaker 1: just more about like that that clamp I think from
Speaker 1: like a Luckwork Orange. I was traumatized from that scene
Speaker 1: where he gets his eye clamped open. Yeah, I just
Speaker 1: I don't know, Okay, I never didn't even know what
Speaker 1: happens in that scene. I do know that that is
Speaker 1: a reference from it, and I've referenced it often for
Speaker 1: some reason. Oh, because my mom can never keep her
Speaker 1: eyes open in pictures. So we do this thing now.
Speaker 1: If you are someone that has a family member or
Speaker 1: you are someone that you keep your always eyes are
Speaker 1: closed in pictures, which is a common thing for people,
Speaker 1: You do a countdown, you close your eyes and then
Speaker 1: you do three to one open instead of trying to
Speaker 1: just keep them open during not gonna work, And it
Speaker 1: really works for my mom. She looked amazing in these
Speaker 1: pictures this weekend. And then one time my sister and
Speaker 1: I clockwork orange her and just held her eyes open.
Speaker 1: Each of us took one eye. It's a hilarious picture.
Speaker 1: Remember the other day in the hotel or wherever you are,
Speaker 1: where you couldn't get the contact out of your eye.
Speaker 1: I'm dying to know. Did you ever find it or
Speaker 1: was it an illusion of a contact? Yeah, there was
Speaker 1: no contact. It fell out. I found it later, so
Speaker 1: it I thought I put it in and it didn't
Speaker 1: put in, And then all day I was like, you know,
Speaker 1: because sometimes if you're a contact warword, you just know
Speaker 1: that sometimes it will kind of drift to the side
Speaker 1: and you'll have one eye that just is kind of
Speaker 1: not and then you're like, oh, or I put it
Speaker 1: in backwards, or it has like some fucking dust on
Speaker 1: it or something, and so I just but instead it
Speaker 1: was just my eye and I kept just pulling at
Speaker 1: my eye skin. It was terrible. Sorry, Noah, but laceic
Speaker 1: I've always been worried about. But I'm so excited to
Speaker 1: like wake up in the morning and just see because
Speaker 1: if there are days where I don't put in context
Speaker 1: because I'm just not in the mood or like I
Speaker 1: just my eyes need to rest because they're feeling like
Speaker 1: I wore context too much to day before. If I
Speaker 1: just wear glasses all day, I feel like sick. There's
Speaker 1: just something I feel like the world is a little
Speaker 1: bit blurrier. I feel like glasses make me feel like
Speaker 1: I'm just I have a day off and I'm just
Speaker 1: kind of like it feels like I'm in a dream state.
Speaker 1: And so contacts always makes me feel like, Okay, we're
Speaker 1: up and running. This is the day. It's like coffee
Speaker 1: for my eye. And so I think if I was
Speaker 1: to wake up every morning and have perfect vision, it
Speaker 1: would give me a boost out of bed because there's
Speaker 1: this just being blurry when I wake up in the
Speaker 1: morning starts me off on a weird foot. Um. I
Speaker 1: also Trend said it was the best thing he ever
Speaker 1: did for himself. There's also, you know, there's fears though,
Speaker 1: because there's always like those fringe stories of like I
Speaker 1: know I lost my vision, but there's always gonna be
Speaker 1: that for everything and buying large and Taylor Swift has
Speaker 1: done it, so if she's done it, I'm gonna do it.
Speaker 1: So I'm gonna get the lasic test today and I
Speaker 1: have a lot more plan today. I'll tell you about
Speaker 1: it when we get back from bright We're back from
Speaker 1: the break that you guys have a good relaxing one.
Speaker 1: I feel rejuvenated, right um. I took a cold shower
Speaker 1: this morning too, because I was like, just I'm just
Speaker 1: doing everything to feel better because I'm a day away
Speaker 1: from starting my period, and I am so sensitive to everything.
Speaker 1: I'm crying about everything. I'm just well not crying. But
Speaker 1: I cried last night because I was able to talk
Speaker 1: to someone about my feelings and like the only way
Speaker 1: to cry is to talk to someone who's like kind
Speaker 1: of pitying you, and and so I was able to cry.
Speaker 1: But I've just been like an open wound, and so
Speaker 1: I and I also on Instagram, I'm just constantly inundated
Speaker 1: with people telling you how to live a better life.
Speaker 1: And it's too much. I don't think it's helping anymore.
Speaker 1: All of these like all of these posts about how
Speaker 1: to you need to get more sunlight. I'm talking to you,
Speaker 1: Andrew Huberman. I can't stand it anymore. You and that room.
Speaker 1: What is he that really good looking guy? Yes? Yes,
Speaker 1: like the one that like is very serious about physicist. Yes,
Speaker 1: he's very smart, and he does a podcast, the Huberman Lab,
Speaker 1: and he's always on there. I mean I listened to stuff,
Speaker 1: so it's always showing up. The algorithm knows that I
Speaker 1: listened to him, but I only listen. I don't do
Speaker 1: what he's says. But it's like, hell, he put up
Speaker 1: a whole system for like living the best life, and
Speaker 1: it's getting like thirty minutes of sun's sun on your face,
Speaker 1: Like look the sun sunlight, yeah, um, and open your
Speaker 1: eyes really wide with clamps, hold your eyes open with
Speaker 1: coming staring at the clipse and maybe you're the sun
Speaker 1: will give you lasi. Who knows. Um, So you gotta
Speaker 1: do that. And my whole house is tinted windows because
Speaker 1: when we did the reality show for the cameras, they
Speaker 1: needed to sit the windows. So all of my plants
Speaker 1: were dying and I didn't know why. And then at
Speaker 1: one point I was like, oh wait, these windows are
Speaker 1: getting no UV lights and so I'm like I have
Speaker 1: not been getting any UV light. My whole apartment has
Speaker 1: these beautiful windows, like it's very well lit, but it's
Speaker 1: all filtered, and so I gotta rip those off, and
Speaker 1: I gotta go stand out in the sun and just
Speaker 1: like look up at it more often. But he also
Speaker 1: says cold plunges are huge. And you know, I watched
Speaker 1: a video of Joe Rogan doing that the other day.
Speaker 1: I would love to have like an ice bath like
Speaker 1: Joe Rogan's where he takes the top off and he
Speaker 1: goes off and he just sits in it for like
Speaker 1: three minutes, And I would love that. I really want
Speaker 1: to get one because I feel like it does it's
Speaker 1: I like when I've accomplished something that is very hard. Yeah,
Speaker 1: you will be candidate for those because you'd be like
Speaker 1: I got down to it even cold or last night.
Speaker 1: You'd be like, we're just like longer, or like there's
Speaker 1: a countdown too, and it's over and it's quick. It's
Speaker 1: not like it's a forty five minute workout kill me.
Speaker 1: I don't want to the what the death is quick
Speaker 1: to know. I think it's probably get the probably be
Speaker 1: a slow death. Know, when you like die of hypothermia,
Speaker 1: you'd strip off all your clothes because you get super
Speaker 1: overheated right before you die. I think that's one of
Speaker 1: the most fascinating things really ever. Yeah, most people they
Speaker 1: find that have died in cold weather, that have gotten
Speaker 1: stuck or walking something. You know, they're always nay kid
Speaker 1: because the last minutes, your body thinks it's burning alive
Speaker 1: and you strip off all your clothes. So it's this
Speaker 1: like paradox of being high of hypoxia. It makes you
Speaker 1: just get naked, and they always find to make it.
Speaker 1: And I'm sure they were very confused by it until
Speaker 1: you know, science came out. Um, and so I did
Speaker 1: the cold shower today. So I went and I worked
Speaker 1: out this morning. And working out, I just want to
Speaker 1: say it was walking on a fucking treadmill. Don't get excited,
Speaker 1: don't be like, don't compare yourself to me and be like,
Speaker 1: I didn't do anything. I literally walked leisurely on a
Speaker 1: treadmill for thirty minutes. It was nothing, and it was
Speaker 1: very hard to do because thirty minutes is even way
Speaker 1: too long to ask me to do anything. It's too long.
Speaker 1: That's why, like an ice bast three minutes in and out,
Speaker 1: you can't. If anything's three minutes, it's a it's fast.
Speaker 1: I want fast workouts, not that it's a workout, but
Speaker 1: it does feel like it because all your muscles tense.
Speaker 1: So anyway, I got done with that and then I
Speaker 1: went and I just turned on the shower and left
Speaker 1: it on cold and got in there and I couldn't
Speaker 1: put my I mean, I didn't wash my hair because
Speaker 1: I washed it yesterday and I didn't want to redo it,
Speaker 1: so I didn't like immerse myself. But oh, I was
Speaker 1: going like oh, and I like, I was like, oh,
Speaker 1: I can't do this every because I was like, I'm
Speaker 1: gonna do this every morning, and I go, I can't
Speaker 1: because I'll wake up my boyfriend if he's sleeping. Because
Speaker 1: it makes you go whoa, whoa. It sounds like I'm
Speaker 1: doing voice exercises, but it was. It does, and it
Speaker 1: makes you you talk about fast shower. I already shower
Speaker 1: so fast. I was in and out in forty five
Speaker 1: seconds because it was just I would like, you know,
Speaker 1: step out of it and scrub myself and then step
Speaker 1: into it to like wash it off. And it did.
Speaker 1: It did like wake me up. It did make me
Speaker 1: feel alive. It made me feel like I did something
Speaker 1: that was hard and I felt accomplished. So that felt
Speaker 1: really good. So I do recommend it. Job don't think
Speaker 1: everything Now that's like trendy and you know for self
Speaker 1: care is just stuff that my Russian ancestors did in
Speaker 1: Lennon Grad or whatever that was cheap because they were poor.
Speaker 1: It's just like put your baby in the snow, can
Speaker 1: do a nice bath. My grandmother was always talking about
Speaker 1: ice baths when I was growing up. I was like yeah, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: And now it's like about ice baths. Yeah. Now they're
Speaker 1: like eight thousand dollar workshops to learn how to do
Speaker 1: an ice bath with a famous guy on. Did they
Speaker 1: know that they were good for your health or did
Speaker 1: they just do it because they didn't have rush everything?
Speaker 1: Have you ever been to it was good for your health? No?
Speaker 1: Have you been to a Russian baths? Yeah? They beat
Speaker 1: you and they do bom with Oakley's with a pair
Speaker 1: of something. Yeah. The oakley so have like little Thornton's
Speaker 1: on them, but it was something Birch leaves. Maybe I
Speaker 1: forget one of those Russians. I've never been to a
Speaker 1: bathom because I just feel like everyone who works in
Speaker 1: it is like a slave. I just feel like when
Speaker 1: people are like we gotta go to the Korean spas,
Speaker 1: I'm like, I like, there's places where people have sex
Speaker 1: and like there's there's shady things going, like they're having
Speaker 1: to give hand jobs in other rooms they have to.
Speaker 1: I just think it's I think there's yeah, I want
Speaker 1: to being focused on, and it's not like all hands
Speaker 1: on deck for a bunch of women in a room.
Speaker 1: It just feels it feels gross to me. It feels
Speaker 1: like and I'm not a germ person, but everyone's always like,
Speaker 1: we got to go to the Korean spot. And I've
Speaker 1: always been like, um, did you guys hear about like
Speaker 1: the world's ending soon? Like I always changed the subject
Speaker 1: so quickly because I don't want to go to a
Speaker 1: Korean spot? What is it fun? Subject change? I used
Speaker 1: to go obsessively all the time in l A to
Speaker 1: this one place and they sadly closed. It was very clean,
Speaker 1: amazingly cheap. Ninety dollars for you could go all day.
Speaker 1: But that's what I'm saying, ninety dollars to go all
Speaker 1: day if you are for an hour, that's too cheap.
Speaker 1: Slavery is happening in there. Maybe what do you do
Speaker 1: in there all day? It's boring? Well, I have like
Speaker 1: religious experiences when I get massages and they like really
Speaker 1: work you, so they would do a body scrub first.
Speaker 1: I would go you shower. Everything is pristinely clean, so
Speaker 1: it feels really nice to give you slippers you never
Speaker 1: like touch. Was watching you shower in the room with
Speaker 1: a bunch of women. Yeah, it's like a huge locker room,
Speaker 1: so you have to get completely naked in front of
Speaker 1: a bunch of women you don't have, OK, it's great.
Speaker 1: How do you know I would give a ship? I'd
Speaker 1: be looking at everyone's body, So if I'm there, I
Speaker 1: give a ship. Might they might give you a cursory glance,
Speaker 1: but they're over it's all they see, so there's maybe
Speaker 1: an equinox. I would have my own stall. I don't
Speaker 1: like this, like showering with everyone, and I'm not someone
Speaker 1: who's that insecure about my body naked. But I just
Speaker 1: so everyone's just get you get in and then you
Speaker 1: get naked with everyone. I honestly, I'm not I'm sorry
Speaker 1: to say this. It gives me Holocaust vibes, the whole idea,
Speaker 1: Like what I picture these places at different naked women
Speaker 1: kind of like shivering, being brought from room to room,
Speaker 1: not really knowing what next room has it and like
Speaker 1: it just gives me, It gives me sad vibes. We're
Speaker 1: paying for this experience, though you're not. Okay. So then
Speaker 1: you take a shower, and then what do you do?
Speaker 1: Then you get into a hot tub hang out and
Speaker 1: they're going to call your name in like twenty minutes
Speaker 1: or whatever. They're going to call your number in twenty minutes.
Speaker 1: Everything is in Korean. So you're the only Caucasian girl.
Speaker 1: They're probably or like one of two. Well that again,
Speaker 1: I don't want to do that because I feel like
Speaker 1: I'm now I'm appropriating their culture and I'm like this
Speaker 1: white girl that's like annoying everyone and I don't know customs.
Speaker 1: But it's great. It's another thing that I fear going abroad.
Speaker 1: I just don't want to bother other places like I
Speaker 1: have to go on this European tour. That's why now,
Speaker 1: because you didn't go, and that's why they closed, right
Speaker 1: they need business. Okay, keep going, so they call your number.
Speaker 1: I'm in the green tea hot uh sauna or the
Speaker 1: hot tub. Then you can go into the red tea
Speaker 1: hot tub. How do you know back? How do you
Speaker 1: know that this is? These are what they are, That's
Speaker 1: what it says on them. It's like this is the
Speaker 1: Green Tea hot tub and they say, shower between hot
Speaker 1: how do you know which one you like or which
Speaker 1: one are the It just feels kind of different on
Speaker 1: your skin. Then you take the cold plunge and how
Speaker 1: did you know about this place? My friend told me
Speaker 1: about it years ago in l A. And I was like,
Speaker 1: oh my god, incredible sounds underground. Okay, keep going. Then
Speaker 1: I want to look into why I got shut down.
Speaker 1: I want to look into why it got shut down.
Speaker 1: I feel like nefarious things were it was during COVID.
Speaker 1: I think it was. Okay, okay, keep going. Um. Then
Speaker 1: then you're in the sauna. Inevitably there's one anorexic woman
Speaker 1: in there who will bum out your whole day because
Speaker 1: she's like eighty pounds rubbing herself like with sweat, and
Speaker 1: you're like, oh, honey, go home, get out of here
Speaker 1: and get some help, get into a twelve step program something.
Speaker 1: Then they're like seventy eight and you're like that's me,
Speaker 1: and then that's yeah, I dropped two pounds. Then you
Speaker 1: go into the massage area. All the women are like
Speaker 1: mid forties over it, but like, what's up? Get on
Speaker 1: the bed, and then they just treat you like a
Speaker 1: piece of meat, but gently, no, no, no, you need
Speaker 1: to back up. You go into so you get called.
Speaker 1: You go into a room and there's multiple women in
Speaker 1: that room just looking at you. Wait on massaging people.
Speaker 1: How many seven seven beds or eight beds, let's say,
Speaker 1: and then they tell you which bed to go on,
Speaker 1: and it's all in like a locker area. So there's
Speaker 1: they are throwing water on you like it's like a
Speaker 1: huge shower with eight beds in a shower and and
Speaker 1: they're like, go shower, So you shower again. You've had
Speaker 1: like seven showers at this point, so you're totally clean.
Speaker 1: When do you get deloused? They're just kidding. I'm just
Speaker 1: comparing it again to the camps. Okay, they draw you
Speaker 1: off the oil you up and then you're just and
Speaker 1: then they cover your friend. They mad at you. Is
Speaker 1: there a vibe of like no, they don't. They're kind
Speaker 1: of up. There's like slapping and no, no, it's more
Speaker 1: like lie down. It's okay, okay, I'm gonna put cold
Speaker 1: cucumber shavings on your face and you're like ohh and
Speaker 1: it's like freezing cold that cucumber that's been an ice.
Speaker 1: They shave it on your face and pack it on
Speaker 1: and then they just like oil you up and then
Speaker 1: you're like, this is kind of hot and great, there's
Speaker 1: nothing sexual about it. They give you like you're completely naked, turnover.
Speaker 1: That's the only English they know, completely naked. You're a
Speaker 1: weirdo and you're not, but like everyone is naked, and
Speaker 1: they put a little towel on your privates. Oh for
Speaker 1: some do put like a washcloth or something. And how
Speaker 1: many hours has it been now it's only it's been
Speaker 1: like twenty minutes. You can arrive half an hour before
Speaker 1: your appointment, and that's what I used to do to
Speaker 1: just get in some of the hot and then the
Speaker 1: appointment is the massage. And then after the massage you
Speaker 1: can just hang out back in the tea tubs and
Speaker 1: the sauna. There's also a really nice room where you
Speaker 1: watch Korean soap operas, and there's like a restaurant and
Speaker 1: they can like this. You gotta go with friends though,
Speaker 1: because this is just like the foot rug place we
Speaker 1: go to, but way higher end with like other options
Speaker 1: or in and out in an hour and we're constantly
Speaker 1: being touched. We don't just sit there and like breathe
Speaker 1: in steam and like have to Like I don't like
Speaker 1: having when we go. When I go to get a
Speaker 1: massage and they go, yeah, you can come in and
Speaker 1: check in an hour early and just get some tea
Speaker 1: and wait in this room, I'm always just like, no,
Speaker 1: I just want to go and get massage then leave.
Speaker 1: I don't want to sit around in a room that
Speaker 1: smells good. I get, but I guess that's women that
Speaker 1: are just trying to escape their kids or something. I agree.
Speaker 1: That seems boring to me. That's why I like this
Speaker 1: where it's like get into a scalding hot hot tub
Speaker 1: of green tea and then jump into one that's red,
Speaker 1: and then jump into the cold plunge and take a shower,
Speaker 1: wash your hair, and then have a great scrub and
Speaker 1: then I'm full on massage for an hour. Wait, they
Speaker 1: scrub you and massage you. First. They scrub you every
Speaker 1: part of you. Sometimes I'd be like, can you do
Speaker 1: it lighter? Like they would scrub off little like skin
Speaker 1: tags I had, Like sometimes I would come out of
Speaker 1: there with little injuries. Yeah. Wow. And then but then
Speaker 1: the massage is amazing. They're great, and it's all tons
Speaker 1: of oil and you're just like, uh, like you're in
Speaker 1: another zone and then you leave and you're like, I
Speaker 1: had seven great epiphanies in there about my career, love life,
Speaker 1: changes I need to make in my life, and now
Speaker 1: I feel great. Okay, So why don't we have these
Speaker 1: in every city? Why is there not St? Louis. I've
Speaker 1: convinced you, yeah, Now I want to aren't ones? Why
Speaker 1: are they only in l a h. They hate Jews
Speaker 1: there and it is part of the Holocaust. I don't
Speaker 1: know why, and why are they so secret? Everyone's always like,
Speaker 1: you gotta go to this Korean spa. There are large
Speaker 1: Korean manipulation. But why are they so secret? Why are
Speaker 1: we all? Why can't Why aren't they just advertise more?
Speaker 1: I feel like it's always like this elite women that
Speaker 1: because white people ruin everything. So one white person goes
Speaker 1: in and it's like, this is cool. You told me
Speaker 1: they went because I didn't go. So I don't what
Speaker 1: to do about any of this. I don't know why
Speaker 1: that one didn't went under. I suspect it was COVID,
Speaker 1: but I started. The longer it was around, the more
Speaker 1: white people showed up in the glamor at God, I
Speaker 1: have to say it was just so you look Asian,
Speaker 1: so they were like maybe I thought you were. You
Speaker 1: could pass because many people have thought you were Asian before.
Speaker 1: It's so nice. Um, I just by the way the
Speaker 1: stuff Nikki that talk about, like blow jobs and all
Speaker 1: of that. I have a friend who goes to those
Speaker 1: kinds of spas and you just kind of like know
Speaker 1: which ones they are, and I'm always like fascinated and that,
Speaker 1: Like I get to ask him all these questions like
Speaker 1: how do you know which guy is into it? Like
Speaker 1: how do they know? Because basically, I mean the stories
Speaker 1: that he tells me, I think he would really really love.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, so he's a guy that goes and gets
Speaker 1: hand jobs and stuff and gets oh my god like him.
Speaker 1: Him and his boyfriend go there and they just have
Speaker 1: a lot of fun with strangers and it's a gay bathhouses. Yes, yes, yes,
Speaker 1: and that was those Those were huge in the eighties
Speaker 1: and nineties too. I think a lot they're not as
Speaker 1: much anymore, but yeah, I mean I mean even talking
Speaker 1: about ones that. I mean, I have a friend who
Speaker 1: went to one in China and she got like her
Speaker 1: asshole fingered, And then I have another friend that got
Speaker 1: her asshole fingered at himself, like, um, because some of
Speaker 1: these places like that is where women do go for
Speaker 1: that kind of sir of us, I guess I don't know.
Speaker 1: I'm just suspicious of I just don't want to go
Speaker 1: up to a place where sexual favors are being dealt out,
Speaker 1: even if they're not to me and they're like, oh good,
Speaker 1: a world's here. I don't have to finger anything. They
Speaker 1: can sniff that out, though, like they won't like if
Speaker 1: if someone comes in, they and this is what I
Speaker 1: asked my friend, like, how do you know that someone
Speaker 1: walking in is going to be into touching your dick?
Speaker 1: And he's like they have a vibe like we can
Speaker 1: all tell who's there for that and who's there and
Speaker 1: we can't do it. An there's like this sexual undercurrent
Speaker 1: that I am not on the wavelength of that where
Speaker 1: people are just like I know we wanted to fund me.
Speaker 1: I'm just like, I have never once never thought a
Speaker 1: guy wanted to fund me, unless it was like he
Speaker 1: told me he wanted to fund me. I've never been
Speaker 1: like we just both knew, like ever and I think
Speaker 1: there's some women that just I was watching this really
Speaker 1: sad show the other day on YouTube called the Soft
Speaker 1: White Underbelly, and it's this guy that just interviews people
Speaker 1: on skid row and just like fascinating people that have
Speaker 1: really said stories. And he was interviewing this woman that
Speaker 1: was sex trafficked and it's one of the worst stories
Speaker 1: I've ever heard. It was so fucking sad, and and
Speaker 1: she was like, Yeah, I just always every single every
Speaker 1: single person, every single man I've ever known, I've just
Speaker 1: always been sexualized since I was like as early as
Speaker 1: I can remember everyone around me. And she wasn't. She
Speaker 1: was raised in Detroit, like and you know, not a
Speaker 1: bad part of it, and she was like just my neighbors,
Speaker 1: everyone like I just was always sexualized. And I just
Speaker 1: I can't even imagine what that would feel like at eleven,
Speaker 1: to feel like people want to fuck you, Like I
Speaker 1: just and I know that some people relate to that.
Speaker 1: I just don't understand. I've never been on that wavelength
Speaker 1: of picking that up or you know, I'm sure it's
Speaker 1: happened where like gross old men are sexually sexualizing me
Speaker 1: at a young age, but I just didn't I didn't
Speaker 1: pick up on it. The saddest thing that I learned
Speaker 1: from this though that she was you know, she met
Speaker 1: a guy. Her parents kind of abandoned her. She was
Speaker 1: hanging with the wrong crowd. Eventually she got introduced to
Speaker 1: this guy that was like, listen, I'll take care of you.
Speaker 1: He's really nice. And she was like, I dealt with
Speaker 1: a lot of like bad people, and he was just
Speaker 1: had a different swagger about him. He was just calm.
Speaker 1: He he didn't have the he didn't have the look
Speaker 1: of someone who was gonna abuse me. Because I've been
Speaker 1: around it so much, I just knew. And so she
Speaker 1: trusted this guy. He's like, I'll buy you new clothes,
Speaker 1: all the stuff. She's thirteen, and she goes to this
Speaker 1: house where she's going to live because this guy is
Speaker 1: going to give her a new life and is really like,
Speaker 1: you know, I've got your back, buys her all these
Speaker 1: new clothes and then one day is like I gotta
Speaker 1: test you out and she's like what. He's like, come on,
Speaker 1: I have to test you out. And she's like, has
Speaker 1: no idea what's even happening. And he's like, you think
Speaker 1: I just bought all this stuff for free for you know,
Speaker 1: you're gonna have to work. And so that was the
Speaker 1: day she was tested out, and then soon what they
Speaker 1: did was and this is happening in every city. It's
Speaker 1: happening in St. Louis. You know there's any kind of
Speaker 1: like motels by airports. This is what's happen opening. And
Speaker 1: it's and she said that she just was taking this
Speaker 1: motel with and these she lived with, all these other
Speaker 1: girls that were all traffic They were all, you know,
Speaker 1: thirteen to sixteen. And they would go to these hotels
Speaker 1: and they would rent a room and they would all
Speaker 1: stay in this room for like days on end, just
Speaker 1: sleeping there, and then they would rent another room where
Speaker 1: they would do their tricks. Not magic trunk. So I'll
Speaker 1: tell you that it wasn't like, oh where the penny go, um,
Speaker 1: It's like, oh, where did my innocence go into this
Speaker 1: fucking man's asshole? Um? And these she said, the most
Speaker 1: oppressing thing was. And this bums me out so much.
Speaker 1: She said, of the men who obviously knew I was
Speaker 1: a thirteen year old or at least somewhere around there,
Speaker 1: looked like normal men that wore dockers and boat shoes,
Speaker 1: that drove in from the suburbs to go to this motel.
Speaker 1: And they would often go with their friends and of
Speaker 1: the time they had a wedding ring and they had
Speaker 1: like she was like, they all looked like my uncle
Speaker 1: who has a family. They always did, and they were
Speaker 1: fucking thirteen year olds. So it just made me realize
Speaker 1: that's happening all the time. I would if I could
Speaker 1: have any wish fulfilled. This is true. I mean, this
Speaker 1: is above um, you know, solving climate change, solving you know,
Speaker 1: world hunger. If I could have one wish fulfilled, it's
Speaker 1: that if you have fucked an underage girl, you have
Speaker 1: a bubble over your head that says I fucked an
Speaker 1: underage girl, and you have to every time you walk
Speaker 1: around and just floating over your head and everyone knows it.
Speaker 1: That is my dream. It would be my dream for
Speaker 1: one day to see and that person wouldn't know that
Speaker 1: they had it, because I guarantee you, your neighbors, your uncle's,
Speaker 1: your brother like you. This underground sex industry is so
Speaker 1: much worse than anyone thinks. It is these men and
Speaker 1: men who are going in to get You're sorry, your
Speaker 1: husband or probably your husband's best friend. There's a ninety
Speaker 1: present chance that your your husband or someone that your
Speaker 1: husband knows with that's someone that you know goes regularly
Speaker 1: to get happy ending massages. And I know you go No,
Speaker 1: no one I know would do that. Yes they do.
Speaker 1: They don't talk about it except on the golf course,
Speaker 1: but so many people do. I would find out people
Speaker 1: that did it and go you because guys tell me
Speaker 1: things they don't tell other women. And I'm telling you
Speaker 1: most of my male friends, I would say fifty percent
Speaker 1: of my male friends have had a happy ending massage before.
Speaker 1: And these are normal men. I know you're like they're comics,
Speaker 1: they're weirdos. No, not just that. They and and so
Speaker 1: I'm not saying your husband did it, but I'm saying
Speaker 1: your husband's friend or your brother or your brother in
Speaker 1: law who you think. He's a family man, he would
Speaker 1: never they do this stuff, man, And they know these
Speaker 1: girls are teens. It's so sick. This girl was like,
Speaker 1: it's just changed the way I looked at the world.
Speaker 1: She's thirty five now, and she's like, it's just the
Speaker 1: things I saw. The men I saw partaking and having
Speaker 1: sex with underage girls in groups for like bachelor parties,
Speaker 1: these were like normal men. These weren't like some of
Speaker 1: the earth like dirty guys. Some of them were, but
Speaker 1: by and large it was like men who pulled up
Speaker 1: in lexus is and it just like bombed me out.
Speaker 1: So much is there is? Have there been any epiphanies
Speaker 1: for you guys when you hear about do you ever
Speaker 1: hear about guys? Do guys ever confess the stuff to you?
Speaker 1: And you go, what? Yeah? I mean years ago when
Speaker 1: I got into music, I was shocked when I would
Speaker 1: hear stories from like other musicians about how prevalent it was.
Speaker 1: I was like, Wow, really, okay, I didn't know that
Speaker 1: it's going on, but I guess it just happens on
Speaker 1: the road. And cheating. I think cheating is another thing
Speaker 1: that everyone goes No, that just doesn't happen that much.
Speaker 1: It is the most I mean, we've talked about this
Speaker 1: on the show before. When Adam Levine the whole thing
Speaker 1: came out, it's like, is anyone surprised by this? You
Speaker 1: gotta see Tar. We got to talk about Tar at
Speaker 1: some point. It's there's also a massage parlor scene in
Speaker 1: Tar that uh I want It was kind of interesting
Speaker 1: and sort of like along the lines of what you're
Speaker 1: talking about, but it's all about power. But it flips
Speaker 1: it on its head because the protagonist is a famous
Speaker 1: female lesbian composer. So it's really interesting. Okay Kate Blanchett, Right, Yeah,
Speaker 1: she's amazing. She can do no un. She was in
Speaker 1: that movie Don't Look Up. And I didn't even know
Speaker 1: it was her. Don't you remember that? She was like,
Speaker 1: don't look up. It was done by um Adam mackay
Speaker 1: and it was during COVID the asteroid that was going
Speaker 1: to come. Yeah, she was amazing in that, and I go,
Speaker 1: who is this woman? She played like the hot Fox
Speaker 1: News girl and she was so good. It was like
Speaker 1: hitting on Leo's character. Did you see Leo was like
Speaker 1: spotted with a bunch of young girls on a yacht. Yeah,
Speaker 1: speaking of young women, I know. I mean, I'm sure
Speaker 1: he's dealt in some of that as well, allegedly, not
Speaker 1: even allegedly. I would just straight up say that it
Speaker 1: probably has happened. I mean, everyone gets prostitutes in Hollywood.
Speaker 1: It's like, and I think White Lotus Season two opened
Speaker 1: our eyes up to that a little bit more, both
Speaker 1: the cheating aspect of things and prostitution and how you know,
Speaker 1: there is nothing shameful about being a prostitute. It's a
Speaker 1: really lucrative industry, and I'm just saying it happens more
Speaker 1: than you think. And it's not just like greasy old
Speaker 1: men who can't get laid. It's family men. And I
Speaker 1: just wish there was more like we could just I
Speaker 1: wish people could understand because I know that there are
Speaker 1: people that just go I don't know anyone who's ever
Speaker 1: got to prostitute. I would bet my life on it.
Speaker 1: And it's like I would bet it would be most
Speaker 1: of the men they know have done it. It's so
Speaker 1: funny your fantasy about the bubble. Yeah, I just want
Speaker 1: a number above their head of how many and dur
Speaker 1: age girls they bucked. I used to have a fantasy
Speaker 1: all growing up, like it started in junior high and
Speaker 1: then continued through high school. And I would just be like,
Speaker 1: I wish, I wish this dream would come true. I
Speaker 1: wish that anyone who had had sex would just float
Speaker 1: up into the sky and we could see the ones
Speaker 1: that have had sex. Because I was a virgin and
Speaker 1: I just like who had done it? Yes, I don't know,
Speaker 1: It's like that is always something I've wanted, is like
Speaker 1: I just want people to you know, I'm interested in
Speaker 1: people being honest about stuff. And when my friends tell
Speaker 1: me that they've been to a prostitute, I don't judge them.
Speaker 1: I don't care. I'm not like you put partook in
Speaker 1: this street. I mean yeah, I go oh at least,
Speaker 1: I mean I never I don't. I feel like I'm
Speaker 1: partaking in some of this, by the way, because look
Speaker 1: at this Andrew Tate stuff. For example, Andrew Tate has
Speaker 1: trafficked women who he probably promised them a good life
Speaker 1: or that they were going to be his girlfriend, and
Speaker 1: now he is forcing them to make only fans accounts
Speaker 1: where they have to make explicit material and porn. So
Speaker 1: he he is, he is, and they're not being paid,
Speaker 1: and he's taking all the profits. That's what Andrew D
Speaker 1: Tate has. Do you think other people aren't doing that?
Speaker 1: Are you thinking, like all the porn you see, that
Speaker 1: woman is like a person that is making her own
Speaker 1: decisions and is getting all the money that she deserves. No,
Speaker 1: porn industry is just so abusive, and I feel I
Speaker 1: feel a lot of times when I am sitting on
Speaker 1: my couch twiddling my thumbs, I've already done my foot
Speaker 1: massage or a million times there's nothing to watch on TV.
Speaker 1: I like, I don't feel like working out, and I
Speaker 1: start thinking about, like I want to watch porn. I
Speaker 1: want to just go jerk off to some porn. I
Speaker 1: feel the same guilt I'm assuming that men feel when
Speaker 1: they want to go get a happy ending of like,
Speaker 1: I know I'm supporting something bad. This feels kind of gross.
Speaker 1: I have this newfound guilt because I know. I know
Speaker 1: the porn I watch is not locally source grass fed
Speaker 1: like I know it isn't. And now I know even
Speaker 1: only fans because you think, oh, I'll go to only
Speaker 1: fancies are women that are empowered. They're doing their own thing.
Speaker 1: Even that is be infiltrated by this pimp culture of
Speaker 1: like the men taking all the money and forcing these
Speaker 1: women to do it. So it's it's hard to find
Speaker 1: you know, local like you know, uh, what's it called
Speaker 1: ethical porn? And I gotta say the women that are
Speaker 1: making ethical porn. If you're missing the mark, you need
Speaker 1: to become a madam and or like a producer and
Speaker 1: start getting your own I thought it before, but I
Speaker 1: don't want women to look I don't. So much of
Speaker 1: porn is based on young women because that's I like
Speaker 1: to see younger women too, like I see like to
Speaker 1: see women in the prime of their sexuality, which is
Speaker 1: in the twenties. And I don't think at twenty or
Speaker 1: in your twenties. I think very few women should get
Speaker 1: into porn in their twenties. I think some women it
Speaker 1: is like the right path, that you already know who
Speaker 1: you are, you know what you want to do. I
Speaker 1: think most women it is. It is a mistake, not
Speaker 1: because it's anything shameful, but because society shames it so
Speaker 1: much that your life will never be the same because
Speaker 1: of how people are going to view you. You're gonna
Speaker 1: be Monica lewinskied, even though you did nothing wrong. Um.
Speaker 1: And I think that even if I were to produce porn,
Speaker 1: I would have to get like women in their thirties
Speaker 1: and forties. And who wants to fucking see that? You know?
Speaker 1: So I that was a joke, but it's it would
Speaker 1: be it would be hard to make the porn. The
Speaker 1: porn I want to see is innocent girls that are
Speaker 1: kind of like being coerced. I like porn where the
Speaker 1: girls like you know, I've talked about it before, reluctant,
Speaker 1: where she's like no, okay, like kind of talked into it,
Speaker 1: and you can you know, obviously you could act to that.
Speaker 1: And I convinced myself the porn I'm watching is acted.
Speaker 1: But um I do I do now have that guilt
Speaker 1: that I assume men have when they, you know, sheepishly
Speaker 1: walk into a massage parlor for a happy ending and
Speaker 1: they convinced themselves that like, no, these girls want to
Speaker 1: be doing this, and that this they're making good money
Speaker 1: and all those things. I'm starting to feel that way,
Speaker 1: you know, it's a positive thing. Is I've seen more
Speaker 1: of those signs in the airports everywhere, actually everywhere. I
Speaker 1: don't think that's a good sign. I think it means
Speaker 1: it's everywhere because I don't see any trafficks call this number,
Speaker 1: we will help you right now. Like I know for
Speaker 1: a fact those girls do not call that number. They're terrified,
Speaker 1: they don't even have phones. It helps at all? No,
Speaker 1: I don't. If anything, I think it is indicative indicative
Speaker 1: of it being a huge issue that is not just
Speaker 1: in like where do they get their phones from? And
Speaker 1: like the guys who are trafficking them aren't watching them.
Speaker 1: I used to work, Yeah, I used to work on
Speaker 1: a radio show like in the trucking industry, and truckers
Speaker 1: are actually like they see a lot of the trafficking
Speaker 1: in through truck stops and stuff like that. And um,
Speaker 1: there's an organization called Women in Trucking and they um
Speaker 1: the female truckers if they would spot someone in the
Speaker 1: restroom that seemed like they were a victim of trafficking,
Speaker 1: they would give them like a a chapstick. And in
Speaker 1: the chapstick, Captor was a number where it's kind of
Speaker 1: like this like innocent way of or like you know,
Speaker 1: like there's like a message in there like do you
Speaker 1: need help without verbalizing in case anyone's like listening. God, Yeah,
Speaker 1: there's um signals and they can give there's like hand
Speaker 1: signals that I haven't learned, but I mean every time
Speaker 1: I see I will say that. Every time I go
Speaker 1: in the bathroom and I see one of those signs,
Speaker 1: I walk out of the bathroom and I go just
Speaker 1: look for men with younger women that appear to be
Speaker 1: their daughters. And then you look around and you see
Speaker 1: it fucking everywhere everywhere, and then you think I'm going
Speaker 1: to say something, and then you go, that's probably his daughter.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna look like a fool and I don't. I
Speaker 1: remember being in an airport, was I with you? I
Speaker 1: was freaking out because this woman was she looked about
Speaker 1: nineteen and she had a baby on her hip, and
Speaker 1: then she was with a man who looked about sixty
Speaker 1: and I was just like, that's got to be his daughter.
Speaker 1: That's got to be And then they kissed and it
Speaker 1: was their fan Emily, and I was just like why,
Speaker 1: And then he came up with like another baby that
Speaker 1: they had together. It was just like, this would be
Speaker 1: so funny to just like call the authorities about disgusting
Speaker 1: men who are dating women that are far too young
Speaker 1: for them and just call authorities about it and report them.
Speaker 1: And I that is my dream to walk up to
Speaker 1: like a really pretty young girl with some old rich
Speaker 1: man who she has to like reluctantly fuck, and walk
Speaker 1: up and hand her a note that says if you
Speaker 1: need help, and have them both read it, because you
Speaker 1: know that he'll be like, what does it say. You'll
Speaker 1: put on his fucking readers and it will say if
Speaker 1: you need help. I'm uh like call nine one whatever
Speaker 1: it is, and she's going to be like, no, this
Speaker 1: is my husband. I go really, we all know you don't. Sure. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that's my idea. That would be so fun to do,
Speaker 1: because you could you could come off like you're being
Speaker 1: a good person, but really you're being a piece of
Speaker 1: ship and like judging this person's life. Yeah, wait, go
Speaker 1: and fund me set up. I'm like, you can use this.
Speaker 1: There's a numbering side. The chapstick is also for his
Speaker 1: balls that I'm assuming are old and chapped, so you can,
Speaker 1: you know, wiggle those in your hand. Um. Yeah, that's
Speaker 1: my new thing. But I think yeah, the thing in
Speaker 1: airports is just to look for young women with men.
Speaker 1: I mean, how often do you see that every fucking where?
Speaker 1: How are you supposed to know what is if someone's
Speaker 1: being I mean, I'm sure there are signed sport that
Speaker 1: you can look for. Speaking of creepy men, we got
Speaker 1: a message about someone sent bestie sent me an article
Speaker 1: about why men become gynecologists, and I sent it to
Speaker 1: Noah and on you last night. And we'll talk about
Speaker 1: that right when we get back, because I get it
Speaker 1: now kind of and let's hear some reasons when we
Speaker 1: come back. Okay, So we got this article sent to
Speaker 1: us from a bestie and it's from the cut. I
Speaker 1: believe that, right, yeah, and it's why men want to
Speaker 1: be umlogists. Yes, um, what did you guys get out
Speaker 1: of this? Because I thought the most interesting one was
Speaker 1: the reasons are women, um are less disgusting than men,
Speaker 1: and so you're not dealing with like smelly, gross patients,
Speaker 1: even though one doctor was like, yeah, the vagina is
Speaker 1: kind of smelly, but most of the time women keep
Speaker 1: better hygiene. You're also not dealing with as many deaths
Speaker 1: because it's not like a constant, like you're just diagnosing
Speaker 1: cancer and death constantly, So it's just usually like helping
Speaker 1: women upkeep. A lot of people. A lot of men
Speaker 1: love um just the process of like bringing life into
Speaker 1: the world when so much of medicine is based around death.
Speaker 1: These are all good reasons some love just um you know,
Speaker 1: getting up in that snatch, um I made me laugh
Speaker 1: so hard. What my female friends in medical school said
Speaker 1: examining women was quote too smelly, which of course can
Speaker 1: be a factor, but in general, women take excellent care
Speaker 1: of themselves. This guy's patting himself on the back for
Speaker 1: not being able to really smell a smelly pussy. It's
Speaker 1: such a weird backhanded compliment to himself. It's so rude
Speaker 1: and also so unprofessional to call them too smelly. You're
Speaker 1: a fucking doctor. Well, he wasn't saying that, He's saying
Speaker 1: his colleagues say that. I just never want a doctor
Speaker 1: to use that phrase too smelly. So one doctor admitted
Speaker 1: that he does. He's he's was thankfully honest and said,
Speaker 1: I love women and I love pussy, and sometimes it's
Speaker 1: hard to like not get a little bit like not
Speaker 1: see a hot woman and like think about it. It's
Speaker 1: not like it always happens, but sometimes that those wires
Speaker 1: get crossed, and I appreciate that honesty. Yeah, that was
Speaker 1: my favorite one because it was like really really honest.
Speaker 1: All the other ones that just felt like a little
Speaker 1: bit like fluff, Like they were just kind of like, oh,
Speaker 1: this is going to be published, so I'm going to
Speaker 1: Women are better patients than men. They have no qualms
Speaker 1: about telling us what's wrong with them, and therefore we
Speaker 1: can do what they what we need to do to
Speaker 1: get them better. Um which was I was of what
Speaker 1: I said is that I thought men dismissed our pain more.
Speaker 1: But um men, There's one that said men tend to
Speaker 1: actually want to give more help to women because they
Speaker 1: don't experience periods or any of the stuff. So when
Speaker 1: they hear a woman being like I have a heavy period,
Speaker 1: they're like, oh, your poor thing. That sounds terrible, and
Speaker 1: they like treat them even better because we've all met
Speaker 1: men that go, oh, my god, it sounds awful you
Speaker 1: bleed all the time? Cramps, Like they almost exaggerate your
Speaker 1: pain because they just can't imagine bleeding out of their dick. Well,
Speaker 1: there are some men that are just like, well, cramps
Speaker 1: that time of the month, and they dismiss it. I
Speaker 1: thought that was interesting. Um, that one made me roll
Speaker 1: my eyes so hard. What I just think men that
Speaker 1: we're better doctors for women because like we're just so gentle,
Speaker 1: because we're just like really respectful of you guys, and
Speaker 1: we know are in a lot of pain. It's like
Speaker 1: you just admit you want to get up in there, right,
Speaker 1: And there's kind of like slagging other women doctors like
Speaker 1: we're just you know, I can't help it, we're better
Speaker 1: at it, Like we're just no more sense. Yeah, I know,
Speaker 1: I don't know. They are saying that they're in the
Speaker 1: minority and that a lot of them get into this
Speaker 1: and they think no one will go to them, which
Speaker 1: is so different from what we were saying yesterday where
Speaker 1: all of us just I didn't even think to go
Speaker 1: to a woman doctor from my women parts, because there
Speaker 1: was a part of me that goes, I don't want
Speaker 1: to be It's the same way that I don't when
Speaker 1: I see a cop pull over a black person, a
Speaker 1: white cop pull over a black person, I go go,
Speaker 1: why are you doing the most cliche thing? So I
Speaker 1: wanted to be different. I wanted to be like, you
Speaker 1: know what, I'm not going to just go to a
Speaker 1: woman doctor because I'm not scared of men. I think
Speaker 1: it's normal for men to be all up in my
Speaker 1: guts um and so. But but that I liked this
Speaker 1: one where the one doctor said that O, B. G
Speaker 1: U N s are tend to be like better people
Speaker 1: to hang out with. Like you know, there's different types
Speaker 1: of comedians too. There's improv comedians, they're stand up comedians,
Speaker 1: there's right you know, late night writers, there's um you know, mimes,
Speaker 1: like the comedy has all these different types of podcasters,
Speaker 1: like radio personalities like I get along with people in
Speaker 1: radio and stand up those are like my two groups
Speaker 1: where like, I always gravitate towards those people because they
Speaker 1: just have my same sensibilities. Even though comedy is a
Speaker 1: wide when you get into comedy, you can choose any
Speaker 1: kind of like specialty, and I think that when doctors
Speaker 1: start out, they can choose any kind of you know,
Speaker 1: they kind of gravitate towards which doctors are the coolest.
Speaker 1: And I have to say that, like O b g
Speaker 1: nds tend to be kind of like cool, cooler and
Speaker 1: like have a better sense of humor because there's more
Speaker 1: women in it, and women don't have as big as
Speaker 1: egos as men just naturally, I mean they can. Women
Speaker 1: can be egomaniacs, for sure, we all know some, including
Speaker 1: more many days. But um, I would find that they're
Speaker 1: probably the one doctor was like, yeah, ob g wins
Speaker 1: are just more fun. They're funny, They're cooler, And I
Speaker 1: think that probably has something to do with it being
Speaker 1: mostly women dominated. Um, specialty is cool. I missed that.
Speaker 1: I like, Um, was it Noah that said this person
Speaker 1: sounds like a serial killer? This guy the female body
Speaker 1: is a metaphor for her womanhood, and I'm granted access
Speaker 1: to her whole identity. If someone was reading my pussy
Speaker 1: like tea leaves or something, and like I thought it
Speaker 1: was like feeling them back like leaves. I thought it
Speaker 1: was any indication of my womanhood. Dude, I don't even
Speaker 1: look at my vagina anymore to me. I don't know
Speaker 1: if you guys have sensed this. Being thirty eight years old,
Speaker 1: thirty eight and seven months years old, I not who's
Speaker 1: counting thirty thirty eight, seven months and three days old.
Speaker 1: I just want to say that my vagina is not
Speaker 1: I'm going through the change of like I am. I
Speaker 1: have a whole bit about it right now about not
Speaker 1: being able to relate to the song wet s Pussy anymore.
Speaker 1: And it's like a travesty and I'm gonna save you
Speaker 1: all that come see me live toward It's available nikck
Speaker 1: glazer dot com um. But it's definitely like it's more
Speaker 1: it's like functional now. I look, I was kind of
Speaker 1: comparing it to like it used to like have a
Speaker 1: heyday right where it was like all I thought about
Speaker 1: and now it kind of it's like my CD player
Speaker 1: in my car, like it one time was of use
Speaker 1: and with so much and now it definitely has a use.
Speaker 1: It holds my like my you know, parking tickets. When
Speaker 1: you like go into a parking garage and you need
Speaker 1: the little thing, you can shove it in there and
Speaker 1: it's like, oh, I found a new use for it.
Speaker 1: And that's also where I put them in my pussy too. Um.
Speaker 1: But it's not like it's it's not it's barely a
Speaker 1: pussy anymore. I feel like it's like a I think
Speaker 1: it just it's more like a crotch. Like it's like, um,
Speaker 1: it's a vagina, I mean, not even a vagina. It's
Speaker 1: a volva, doesn't It's not. I never wanted to be.
Speaker 1: It's so interesting because I always thought there would be
Speaker 1: a part in my life where I wouldn't talk about
Speaker 1: sex as much on stage because people always were like,
Speaker 1: you're a sex comedian, why do you talk about sex
Speaker 1: so much. It's cool that you do, you know, whatever
Speaker 1: perspective they had, it's cool that you do. It's weird
Speaker 1: that you do. And I always said, I'll stop talking
Speaker 1: about sex when I'm not interested in it. And I
Speaker 1: swear to god, sex is like five percent of my
Speaker 1: act right now, and it was a hundred percent of
Speaker 1: it in the past twenty years. And now it's like
Speaker 1: you know of it now it's like five percent. I
Speaker 1: don't even talk about it at all. I talk about
Speaker 1: like maybe a little bit. But it's I'm going through
Speaker 1: the change, and it's it's sad because I miss I
Speaker 1: miss like loving sex so much and being obsessed with it,
Speaker 1: and now I just I mean, I still love having orgasms.
Speaker 1: I still love watching porn. Do you you don't watch porn?
Speaker 1: Do you? On? You? Once in a great while? Like?
Speaker 1: Do you are you allowed to watch porn when you
Speaker 1: live with a man? Yes? I can do whatever I
Speaker 1: want to. I know you don't have to call Chris
Speaker 1: d'eliah first and ask him if I have Can I
Speaker 1: watch um? Dude on your knees? Um, but I'm at
Speaker 1: my grandma's funeral. Good on your knees and send me
Speaker 1: a picture while I'm already on my knees praying, praying.
Speaker 1: Um wait is again? So did you though? Do you
Speaker 1: mean you watch broadcast? And I'm not like, hey, I'm
Speaker 1: watching porn in here, or I watched porn today. I
Speaker 1: kind of keep it, would you ever? I have been
Speaker 1: horny when my boyfriend is passed out next to me,
Speaker 1: and I got really horny and I wanted to watch
Speaker 1: it in bed next to him. I think that should
Speaker 1: have been an advertisement for temper pedick mattresses. Remember when
Speaker 1: the woman used to jump with the glass wine and
Speaker 1: it wouldn't feel like you can jerk off next to
Speaker 1: your boyfriend and he won't wake up, or vice versa,
Speaker 1: you know, like I mean, that was what they were
Speaker 1: trying to get across. Ris wanted to or I would
Speaker 1: have no problem if my boyfriend in any world wanted
Speaker 1: to jerk off next to me, I'd be like, thank
Speaker 1: you for reading my body language tonight, like you know,
Speaker 1: like that's good. But I don't think that i'd want
Speaker 1: I don't. I don't think either of us would want
Speaker 1: to see each other do that. But I am ashamed
Speaker 1: sometimes that I pourn to me is just faster and easier,
Speaker 1: and just holding a little thing over my clip and
Speaker 1: laying like a minute toboggan is easier than being spread legged,
Speaker 1: and like you know, it's quicker, faster, it's a quick
Speaker 1: it's like a cold shower compared to workout. It's just
Speaker 1: quick and done. And yeah, final thought, the kids are
Speaker 1: almost here. I am freshed for them, and that will
Speaker 1: last two seconds of me giving those presents. I'm getting
Speaker 1: their coming in the car. They're giving me the car.
Speaker 1: Should I go to the aquarium, I feel like I
Speaker 1: can't go support. The zoo is free, but it's freezing
Speaker 1: outside today. So I don't feel bad going to the
Speaker 1: zoo because I'm not giving them any money, and so
Speaker 1: I don't feel bad about it as much as I
Speaker 1: would the aquarium because I just don't want to support.
Speaker 1: I can't imagine a trip with Aunt to the zoo. Now,
Speaker 1: those flamingoes, those are endangered and they're suffering right now
Speaker 1: because they're here there at this because I meant their board. Um,
Speaker 1: I wish someone would have been more honest with me
Speaker 1: as a kid about that stuff. Of like, because I
Speaker 1: knew kids are very perceptive. You go to the monkey
Speaker 1: exhibit and they're board, they're sad, they have moss growing
Speaker 1: on them. They it smells. They're all picking each other's
Speaker 1: butts and noses. There's like a rock that one of
Speaker 1: them is like throwing around. There's like an old like
Speaker 1: baby doll that one of them is like ripping to shreds.
Speaker 1: It's like it's so depressing, and I got that vibe
Speaker 1: from it, or the the sea lion is just going
Speaker 1: the same pattern over and over past the windows. This
Speaker 1: isn't happy times and so but I think that you're
Speaker 1: just like tricked into thinking Zoos or like these magical places.
Speaker 1: And I know the people that work at Zoos are
Speaker 1: obsessed with animals and conservation and they are, you know,
Speaker 1: trying to do the right thing. I mean, I used
Speaker 1: to want to work at Sea World and get my
Speaker 1: ponytail tugged on by tilculum and then drowned in front
Speaker 1: of a crowd. I guess it wasn't in front of
Speaker 1: a crowd, but I just, I mean, as much as
Speaker 1: I do want to go to that aquarium, because I
Speaker 1: do love aquariums. I used to want to be a
Speaker 1: marine biologist when I was little, until I figured out
Speaker 1: that you know, to be a marine biologist you have
Speaker 1: to like measure them and like track there, like mating
Speaker 1: patterns and stuff. I just thought you just would like
Speaker 1: play with them and like teach them how to do
Speaker 1: tricks my hand in the middle of an an enemy,
Speaker 1: oh yeah, or just pet a stingray. Did you guys,
Speaker 1: did you guys ever have dreams of being like working
Speaker 1: with animals? Did you have what was your like in
Speaker 1: third grade, I want to be this when I grow up.
Speaker 1: I definitely thought about marine biologists, but I used to
Speaker 1: always say paleontologists or archaeologists. That seemed fun to me,
Speaker 1: like digging, digging up fossils, and nothing about your life
Speaker 1: now that leads me to believe that would have been
Speaker 1: up interest to you. I know, I used to dig
Speaker 1: in the dirt a lot. I mean I grew up
Speaker 1: in the sticks all by myself. Talking sometimes when I
Speaker 1: say I look ugly, you dig for a compliment for me,
Speaker 1: and you go, no, you're you're a little complimented. Fact. No,
Speaker 1: So is there anything in your life that you can
Speaker 1: look at now where you go? Oh, like, do you
Speaker 1: are you did you watch Jurassic Park? Do you like?
Speaker 1: Were you into that? Are you into dinosaurs? Like? Why paleontologists?
Speaker 1: Did you think it just sounded smart when people would
Speaker 1: maybe I thought it sounded smart and I was trying
Speaker 1: to be like my friend, but it did seem really
Speaker 1: cool to like be digging and find anxious civilizations. But
Speaker 1: I also was obsessed with like songwriting and radio, and
Speaker 1: I had radio shows when I was like eight. Okay,
Speaker 1: so that it all came to be and no, what
Speaker 1: did you want to be when you were in third grade?
Speaker 1: What was your like lofty dream? Well, it's so funny
Speaker 1: because also a marine biologist. And I think it's just
Speaker 1: because it sounded smart and you get to work with animals,
Speaker 1: and then I wanted to be a veterinarian. What is this?
Speaker 1: Why do we and why did we all know the
Speaker 1: word marine biologists? Like I didn't even know what a
Speaker 1: biologist was. There was I think I found out a
Speaker 1: biologist was a separate thing after marine biologists. Why do
Speaker 1: kids all know marine biology? And why? When I fantasized,
Speaker 1: she looked like Christie Brinkley, Like I always said, if
Speaker 1: I was a marine biologist, I'll be tall, tan, blond
Speaker 1: with opponent tail, Like you get to wear a wetsuit
Speaker 1: in front of a crowd. I mean the crowd part
Speaker 1: was a part of it for me for sure. And
Speaker 1: then the seal would come out and I go, look
Speaker 1: at you, look at Rufus. Everyone clapped the rufus and
Speaker 1: then Rufus would give me a high five, and then
Speaker 1: the dolphin would come up and like on its body
Speaker 1: and then you go and I would kiss it and
Speaker 1: I go, oh, I'm blushing and then he goes and
Speaker 1: everyone and I go, oh, now, oh, look you, Rodney's
Speaker 1: getting jealous. And then a killer whale would come out
Speaker 1: and then I'd kiss him on his little nose and
Speaker 1: bloop boop him and then he would go down. And
Speaker 1: then have you ever seen a blooga whale? Oh that's
Speaker 1: if anything could get kids to be runing biologists. Bluga
Speaker 1: whales heads are so squishy and gishy. That is what
Speaker 1: I want to do. I never even saw that before,
Speaker 1: but it makes me want to go back to school
Speaker 1: for it. Oh those bluega whale heads, they're like those
Speaker 1: those balls that you get a target that I'm about
Speaker 1: to get my nephew to buy my thinking it's the
Speaker 1: most expensive thing there. That's the most valuable thing. All right,
Speaker 1: the kids are here. I have to go. Thank you
Speaker 1: guys for listening. Thank you to Anya, thank you to Noah.
Speaker 1: Don't be empty, but