Speaker 1: M m hm. This is welcome back to Good Mom's
Speaker 1: Bad Choices. I'm Erica and I'm Mila. Happy Wednesday, Bitches
Speaker 1: had hoes, bitches a house, bitches and nose and everything
Speaker 1: in between.
Speaker 2: Happy hump Day. How are you feeling? I feel good.
Speaker 1: It's money March, Baby, it's money March. It's first of all, wait, rewind, we're.
Speaker 2: Okay.
Speaker 1: I feel really good because it's International Women's Day today.
Speaker 2: Yes, it is.
Speaker 1: And you know what that means, baby, I.
Speaker 2: Do know it means. Today is our birthday. Today is
Speaker 2: the Good Mom's birthday.
Speaker 1: It's our five year anniversary. We have been doing this
Speaker 1: shit for.
Speaker 2: Five other fucking years yours. Wow. Wow wow wow wow.
Speaker 1: And what and what a testament that lands today an
Speaker 1: actual episode day drop on a Wednesday. A Also that
Speaker 1: it is money Mars. We're focusing on money and like
Speaker 1: really being able to reflect on the growth of this
Speaker 1: beautiful baby that we've nurtured and created.
Speaker 2: Oh my goh, so much growth. I just can just
Speaker 2: see us in the dining room right now in my head,
Speaker 2: all the levels, all the angles of the dining room,
Speaker 2: the bedroom, everywhere, everywhere you name it. We've podcasted. I
Speaker 2: know it's wild.
Speaker 1: And like even the releasing of our first episode, Sex
Speaker 1: Apps and Kids. If you haven't listened to our first episode,
Speaker 1: it's titled sex Apps and Kids, And we didn't even
Speaker 1: realize we.
Speaker 2: Were releasing it on International Women's Day.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I don't think we did. It was just like
Speaker 1: we're gonna release it on this day. And then I
Speaker 1: happened to like look on Instagram and it was like
Speaker 1: it's International Women's Day.
Speaker 2: We're like, oh, perfect, that makes sense. Yeah, we were like, okay,
Speaker 2: this makes this makes sense. I know. I mean even
Speaker 2: that that episode Secks Ups and Kids, we didn't really
Speaker 2: record it thinking that I was gonna be our first episode.
Speaker 2: It was supposed to be a test, and then we
Speaker 2: were like, I don't have another hour to do this,
Speaker 2: let's just put this one out. Yeah, and just jet,
Speaker 2: I wish you would have listened to it before we
Speaker 2: came just genuinely the growth, like personally individually, like where
Speaker 2: we came from to where we are, it's crazy.
Speaker 1: And like really having no expectation to make really any money.
Speaker 1: I still like think back on so many parts of
Speaker 1: our journey and like not really knowing or not really
Speaker 1: having any clarity on why we're doing what we're doing,
Speaker 1: you know what I mean, Like, I don't even know
Speaker 1: why I asked you to start a podcat has to
Speaker 1: be honest. I mean, I know there was some sort
Speaker 1: of intention. I think I like wanted to just do
Speaker 1: something with somebody. But it wasn't like I had these
Speaker 1: big plans.
Speaker 2: No, but weren't gonna like we're gonna do We're gonna
Speaker 2: we're gonna make all this money. It was just like that,
Speaker 2: it's something to do, let's do it. Like we were.
Speaker 2: I think we were bored, lonely, desperate for change. I
Speaker 2: don't know, we had no clear intention because it wasn't
Speaker 2: like we're gonna, hey, do you want to serve business
Speaker 2: with me? That definitely wasn't the the first mind.
Speaker 1: Yeah, And that's probably why we've been successful, honestly, because
Speaker 1: there wasn't this pressure that I think a lot of
Speaker 1: people put on themselves to be super successful. Even now
Speaker 1: in this podcasting space, Like there's so many podcasts now
Speaker 1: and you know, we can hit up all the time
Speaker 1: about you know, just how to start one, and I
Speaker 1: don't have the answers for that because there really were
Speaker 1: no rules here. I think, like when you move with
Speaker 1: just honesty and excitement and just without like the hope
Speaker 1: to make a million dollars in podcasting, Like that's kind
Speaker 1: of the secret.
Speaker 2: I think that it's a secret not overthinking it and
Speaker 2: not overthinking it, because one thing we didn't do was
Speaker 2: overthink it, and it was intentional, but it was really
Speaker 2: just like our only intention was to come to show
Speaker 2: up and tell the truth, like, hey, don't lie, don't
Speaker 2: sugarcoat shit, and here we are, here we are. We've
Speaker 2: done a lot, a lot, a lot, a lot, a lot,
Speaker 2: a lot, a lot, a lot of a lot of
Speaker 2: things in five years. My love, a lot of events,
Speaker 2: a lot of meetups, a lot of new friends, a
Speaker 2: lot of trips, a lot of tears, a lot of
Speaker 2: community building. Literally, I'm just thinking of like Joshua Tree
Speaker 2: and fucking getting our hair braided and doing your eyelashes
Speaker 2: on camera while we were recording a podcast.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, and just and the kids like interrupting, like
Speaker 1: all of our episodes and the elevator music and us
Speaker 1: recording on two iPhones and the drama trying to get
Speaker 1: the fucking videos off the iPhone, editing Amazon microphone, editing
Speaker 1: an iMovie, like putting up episode like editing till three
Speaker 1: in the morning so that I could release the episode
Speaker 1: at eight am. Like just so so much blood, sweat,
Speaker 1: fucking tears.
Speaker 2: And making no money at all. We didn't really know
Speaker 2: why we were doing it. We just knew we had
Speaker 2: to keep going.
Speaker 1: We weren't making a dollar, not one fucking dollar. In fact,
Speaker 1: you guys breaking news. We were lying about some of
Speaker 1: the ads that we were like placing in the podcast
Speaker 1: early on. They were our friends. Oh yeah, like that,
Speaker 1: what was it for? Like the model experience. Model Experience
Speaker 1: was ventured Souls. It was like beauty blender. It was
Speaker 1: like a bunch of just random things that we just
Speaker 1: made up because.
Speaker 2: We were manifesting getting adds. We were manifesting.
Speaker 1: So much lying on media kits as we knew eventually
Speaker 1: we'd hit those numbers, and we have like times ten.
Speaker 1: So congratulations, thank you on five years of dedicating yourself
Speaker 1: to this and sitting down every week to talk and
Speaker 1: reflect and grow and heal and push.
Speaker 2: Forward the collective. Congratulations. Congratulations, we have come a very
Speaker 2: long way. We're not in the dining room, We're in
Speaker 2: our own studio. We have our book on the dining
Speaker 2: room table. I mean not the dining room table, the table,
Speaker 2: the coffee table. And we just came back from Costa
Speaker 2: Rica from leading our sixth retreat, and we're wearing our merch.
Speaker 1: Yeah, guys, if you haven't checked out our merch, we
Speaker 1: have a new drop. It's our first sweatsuit drop. It's
Speaker 1: super cute. It's a redo of our really popular Manifest
Speaker 1: University sweatshirt that we did a few years ago, and
Speaker 1: so we reimagined it and know, I think I'm gonna
Speaker 1: just model it because you know, the youtubes love the modeling.
Speaker 1: So if you're if you're listening, go on YouTube right now.
Speaker 2: Okay, we're modeling. Okay, okay, let's see. She's wearing the
Speaker 2: full Manifest Universe, straight up Manifest University sweatsuit. It's teal,
Speaker 2: it's pink, it's cute, it's uniformed, it's screamed spiritual storty
Speaker 2: and turn around. I look that cute. But and on
Speaker 2: the back get down says words or spells because they
Speaker 2: are now watch what you say. You should see her
Speaker 2: on her knees.
Speaker 1: I'm on my knees.
Speaker 2: Oh, bend over, baby, so we can see how it
Speaker 2: so it's it really works. It's stretches. It's good for
Speaker 2: work and play.
Speaker 1: It's super comfortable, you can still.
Speaker 2: Like, you know, shake the mass. It's pigment dyed. I've
Speaker 2: been wearing it for like three days straight, so I
Speaker 2: know this ship.
Speaker 1: Me and Mela showed up to the airport in the
Speaker 1: same fucking sweatsuit like twice.
Speaker 2: Tweetled Bean tweetled dumb. You gotta represent it, we do.
Speaker 1: So yeah.
Speaker 2: Oh also, I'm wearing our Reimagine long sleeves heather gray,
Speaker 2: black as fuck, mam as fuck, and of course fine
Speaker 2: as Fuck tea that was re released on uh in
Speaker 2: Black History Month.
Speaker 1: So yeah, that's our Oh and then this is the
Speaker 1: children's meet with the kids. If you want to match
Speaker 1: with your with your with your mini me, we have
Speaker 1: the mini manifest University. And look what it says on
Speaker 1: that back.
Speaker 2: Oh so cute.
Speaker 1: I am magic because the children are magic and they
Speaker 1: need to always remember that they're walking manifestation, walking affirmation.
Speaker 2: So these are our These are our designs.
Speaker 1: By the these are our designs.
Speaker 2: We are the designers, with the designer of all the
Speaker 2: cute people always are like so who designed your march?
Speaker 2: And like us sweet us designer.
Speaker 1: We are Canva artists.
Speaker 2: I don't know why you're telling everybody business.
Speaker 1: Because they need to know that it's fucking you can.
Speaker 1: You too can be a merch designer. It's not like
Speaker 1: some secret shit. I think people look at businesses and
Speaker 1: they feel like things are unattainable. They think like even
Speaker 1: our like the success that we've had, is unattainable. They
Speaker 1: think that like creating their own online store is unattainable,
Speaker 1: Creating their own retreat business is unattainable. Writing a book
Speaker 1: is unattainable. It feels overwhelming. It feels like something that
Speaker 1: you have to wait for, You have to get to
Speaker 1: a certain level in order to do certain things, and
Speaker 1: you will fucking your dreams and will crash and burn waiting.
Speaker 2: That's true, you can't wait. I think that's our biggest
Speaker 2: testament to like this is that we just did it
Speaker 2: and we didn't wait, and we didn't let anyone tell
Speaker 2: us it was too much and the name was too uh,
Speaker 2: too taboo or the things we're talking about too or
Speaker 2: too risque, and we committed to whatever we said we
Speaker 2: were going to do, and we did that shit consistently,
Speaker 2: even if we didn't really know, like the law long
Speaker 2: term goal as they came up, we rose to the
Speaker 2: occasion and like we were ready when opportunity came. And yeah,
Speaker 2: we manifested a lot of shit and we sold ourselves
Speaker 2: high because we had like high regard for our brand
Speaker 2: and our business even without the entire full, bigger picture.
Speaker 1: And that leads me to today's affirmation, which I think
Speaker 1: should just be commit to your shit and the money
Speaker 1: will come.
Speaker 2: Commit to your shit and the money will come.
Speaker 1: Yeah, just commit to your passions. Like if you say
Speaker 1: you want to do it, then just do it, you know,
Speaker 1: and it doesn't have to be crazy. I think we
Speaker 1: like try to like overwhelm ourselves with these major goals
Speaker 1: and like these major milestones that we have to hit.
Speaker 1: And one thing I learned from my mom was just
Speaker 1: do one thing every single day to push the needle forward,
Speaker 1: Just one thing. It doesn't have to be the whole
Speaker 1: fucking thing. And this is the thing I've had to
Speaker 1: learn too, because I'm one of these people, like I
Speaker 1: get really a lot of anxiety if like there's things
Speaker 1: left unchecked on my checklist that I feel like I
Speaker 1: could have accomplished in the day, and like I've had
Speaker 1: to release that I've really like tried hard over the
Speaker 1: last few months to release that because it does nothing
Speaker 1: for me. It is nothing for Jamila, it is nothing
Speaker 1: for anyone in my business by me like making everyone
Speaker 1: feel like everything is super important. Granted there is a
Speaker 1: lot of important shit that's happening, but it's all going
Speaker 1: to get done. It's all going to get done. And
Speaker 1: I feel like my value has a lot of my
Speaker 1: value has been linked to how much work I get done,
Speaker 1: you know, And I think that's that's something that I
Speaker 1: think a lot of women, I think men and women
Speaker 1: we struggle with. It's like our value is really linked
Speaker 1: to our productivity. And once we kind of release that,
Speaker 1: it becomes so much more stress free, it becomes so
Speaker 1: much more enjoyable. And you start to realize that, like
Speaker 1: no one was waiting for that thing to be posted,
Speaker 1: No one even knew it was gonna get posted, you know,
Speaker 1: except you, bitch.
Speaker 2: I mean, there's like this fine balance too, because like
Speaker 2: some of the one of the greatest pieces of business
Speaker 2: advice we ever got was from mel Robbins, and she
Speaker 2: was like, don't disrespect your business and don't let anybody
Speaker 2: else disrespect your business. And you know, like this this
Speaker 2: entire journey has been a lot of things, a lot
Speaker 2: of like learning about ourselves, I mean, and then learning
Speaker 2: about ourselves in this space like as bosses and as
Speaker 2: businesswomen and making hard decisions and making fucked up fucking
Speaker 2: up and learning from them and taking l's and getting
Speaker 2: passed up on and just like and taking risks like
Speaker 2: it's risky, and we took personal risks with this podcast
Speaker 2: because it's not easy to tell like all of our
Speaker 2: business and like be vulnerable. But you know, it's like,
Speaker 2: what's it saying scared money? Don't make money? So it's
Speaker 2: just like this fine balance between respecting your shit and
Speaker 2: also like understanding that like shit always will get done.
Speaker 2: But you know, just like the journey of becoming a
Speaker 2: boss ass bitch in business has been, it's not like
Speaker 2: always that easy. And even to this point, it's like
Speaker 2: it becomes even more anxiety written because there's more writing
Speaker 2: on the line, there's more people writing on you. There's
Speaker 2: more like it's just a higher price to pay when
Speaker 2: shit doesn't go as planned. So I've had to do
Speaker 2: a lot of like I don't know we were talking
Speaker 2: about sorry, I.
Speaker 1: Know, I was just saying, like just you know, I
Speaker 1: was just sharing that my product, my value has a
Speaker 1: lot has been linked to my productivity and feeling like
Speaker 1: I have to get everything done all at once.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yes, and I agree. And I also think that
Speaker 2: we are very lucky that we found a business that
Speaker 2: also brings us like personal fulfillment. And I don't think
Speaker 2: it would have been as successful because like, it wasn't
Speaker 2: about the value in the beginning. It was just about
Speaker 2: like needing to get something out, you know, like what was.
Speaker 1: The value to us it was a value, and how
Speaker 1: it affected our well being, how we felt after talking
Speaker 1: for an hour to two hours with each other and
Speaker 1: then putting it out there, because I think it really
Speaker 1: like we put it out there. We barely listened to
Speaker 1: it and just put it out. But I felt better
Speaker 1: after sitting and talking to you about whatever the fuck
Speaker 1: was bothering me, right, And then somehow that also made
Speaker 1: someone else feel better because they were maybe feeling the
Speaker 1: same way too, Like.
Speaker 2: The spiritual equity that it brought, the spiritual fulfillment that
Speaker 2: it brought like leads and led to financial like financial
Speaker 2: fulfillment because there was like a bigger fulfillment that it
Speaker 2: was like holding and caring, and I couldn't understan. I
Speaker 2: didn't understand it at first, but I think there is
Speaker 2: something like we have conversations with our friends all the time,
Speaker 2: sometimes that as honest as us, but like also the
Speaker 2: releasing it into the universe, and now I'm letting it go,
Speaker 2: you know, and I don't care what anybody says, and
Speaker 2: even for me, because I'll talk about stuff or I'll
Speaker 2: think about stuff, but then I won't like ever think
Speaker 2: about it or pick it back up. It was a
Speaker 2: way to just be like and there's nothing you could
Speaker 2: do about it, you know. Like it's been definitely been
Speaker 2: a factor in like self acceptance for me because it's
Speaker 2: just like, for sure he said what I said.
Speaker 1: I think there also came a point though in our
Speaker 1: business where we were like and it's there does I
Speaker 1: think there comes a point in everyone's business, no matter
Speaker 1: what your passions are, if you're passionate about something and
Speaker 1: like you really actually want to you know, monetize the
Speaker 1: business or really start to like, you know, enjoy the
Speaker 1: fruits of your labor. Besides getting messages from women that
Speaker 1: are like me too, there was a moment I think
Speaker 1: in our I don't know what to think. It was
Speaker 1: like I think it was like year three, which is
Speaker 1: not that long ago, and it was like December, and
Speaker 1: I think I said to you, like, we have to
Speaker 1: make money next year. And I think once we like.
Speaker 2: Flicked that on, like, well, if we don't make money,
Speaker 2: what are we actually doing? Like like what the fuck?
Speaker 2: Like we're working hard, but for what?
Speaker 1: M M. But I think like, okay, we've established that
Speaker 1: we're like we're here, we are with the shits. We're
Speaker 1: all about you know, sharing, elevating the community, supporting our community,
Speaker 1: they're supporting us, But like what else, Like how we how?
Speaker 1: What is how do we create even more value here?
Speaker 1: And I think once we started really like taking time
Speaker 1: and space to really think about it, things just kind
Speaker 1: of started happening. I think we started to actually become
Speaker 1: more intentional, whereas before we were just like Okay, it's
Speaker 1: because every week was like we're just trying to catch up,
Speaker 1: keep up, keep up. Oh my god, there's another Oh
Speaker 1: my god, it's another week. Oh my god, it's another episode.
Speaker 1: Oh my god. They told us we can't take any seasons.
Speaker 1: They told us that this is the best way to
Speaker 1: do it. We got that advice early on with podcasting,
Speaker 1: and I don't know if that's actually like sound advice
Speaker 1: at this point in you know, podcasting.
Speaker 2: Consist of like not taking off any breaks. Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 2: we certainly did it. And I don't know if that
Speaker 2: like killed us or like made us super committed, because
Speaker 2: after you've done it every week for two years or
Speaker 2: three years, you're like, this is not going to be
Speaker 2: the end all, like things are starting to cost money.
Speaker 2: We need to do this and slowly and surely, like
Speaker 2: I think as soon as you write, as soon as
Speaker 2: you made that decision, slowly, like honestly, like the biggest
Speaker 2: beginning for us of making money was like, yeah, we
Speaker 2: started to like create little small batch merch runs, but
Speaker 2: the book and that was not something we seeked out.
Speaker 2: It like found us. And even that entire first year
Speaker 2: of writing the proposal of our book, like we didn't
Speaker 2: know that there was like a financial gain on the
Speaker 2: other side. I don't really know what the fuck we thought.
Speaker 2: We were just like, let's write this thing. It took
Speaker 2: us a year to write, and then finally we took
Speaker 2: all these meetings and at the end of all these meetings,
Speaker 2: our agents were like, Okay, now you get to choose,
Speaker 2: and I'm like, well, how do we choose? And they're like, well,
Speaker 2: whoever offers you the most money and we were like what, well,
Speaker 2: how much should they be offering? Guess I was like
Speaker 2: really looking forward to hearing whatever like these numbers, and
Speaker 2: they're like, well, hopefully in the six figures. I said, bitch,
Speaker 2: why didn't you say that sooner? I literally I think
Speaker 2: we're in New York, are on a call, and we're like,
Speaker 2: what the fuck are they talking about? And sure enough,
Speaker 2: that first like we got the highest bidder and the
Speaker 2: highest bidder head was Harper and we had six figures,
Speaker 2: and we we made a decision that that day this
Speaker 2: was gonna this wasn't this wasn't going to be the
Speaker 2: last of our biggest checks we ever got. And that
Speaker 2: was just that was the only decision that had to
Speaker 2: be made. And literally when we went to go write
Speaker 2: the book in Costa Rica, we created the Good vibera
Speaker 2: treat on accident and then that really shifted things for
Speaker 2: our business, and we grew that business in one year
Speaker 2: because we were really committed. I think once you do
Speaker 2: something like for no pay consistently for three years, like
Speaker 2: you really don't have you don't have fear, Yeah, you know,
Speaker 2: like I can do this, I can do anything.
Speaker 1: Fuck it, I did it for this long without money.
Speaker 1: Fuck it, let's try and make some money.
Speaker 2: Yeah, like it was, it was and yeah, and here
Speaker 2: we are. And then we made six figures in the
Speaker 2: first year with that business because we said out loud,
Speaker 2: this is not going to be the last time that
Speaker 2: we do this.
Speaker 1: I think there's something to be said too about the Tribe.
Speaker 1: I shout out to the Tribe and everybody listening, like,
Speaker 1: you know, being able to speak to you guys directly,
Speaker 1: and you know, form relationships with so many of you,
Speaker 1: Like we've done a lot of talking one on one
Speaker 1: with many many of you, and whether that's in social
Speaker 1: whether that's on our discord community, whether that's you coming
Speaker 1: to the Good Vibe retreat, whether that's you coming to
Speaker 1: our meet up, coming to our live shows. Like we've
Speaker 1: definitely like created bondships with a lot of a lot
Speaker 1: of people. And because of that, you guys kind of
Speaker 1: like do the work for us, spread the message. That's
Speaker 1: really like the secret to our growth is like other
Speaker 1: people sharing other good moms, other people sharing us. And
Speaker 1: so I think that because we were so genuine and
Speaker 1: continue to be genuine in our commitment to you and
Speaker 1: commitment to creating spaces for you guys to feel safe.
Speaker 1: The community has in turn supported us and our dreams.
Speaker 1: And I think that there's no amount of monetary there's
Speaker 1: no amount of money that can build that kind of
Speaker 1: that kind of.
Speaker 2: What's the word I'm looking for.
Speaker 1: I don't want to say following, but just trust, trust,
Speaker 1: And I think a lot of it had to come
Speaker 1: without money because it had to be really genuine. And
Speaker 1: I think a lot of people missed that step. They
Speaker 1: missed the step of like cultivating community.
Speaker 2: Genuine community, not yeah, like just genuine trust, genuine relationship relationships.
Speaker 1: You can't skip over that part if you're if your
Speaker 1: business is community based, there's no way to skip over it.
Speaker 1: I don't care how many fucking Instagram ads you run,
Speaker 1: I don't care how many panels you speak on. Like
Speaker 1: the groundwork happens at the ground and you have to
Speaker 1: build the community, and it takes time, and it takes honesty,
Speaker 1: and it takes commitment.
Speaker 2: It takes for you to really be committed to it
Speaker 2: in order to build that and like, yeah, I mean
Speaker 2: even with each other, you know, I think, like even
Speaker 2: not really knowing each other in the beginning, and like
Speaker 2: the trust that we've built. I think the more we
Speaker 2: began to trust each other, the momentum grew and like
Speaker 2: what we saw that we could accomplish together. You know,
Speaker 2: it's just like it's like a web. You know, it
Speaker 2: started here and this friendship. You know, even within the
Speaker 2: relationship with ourselves, you know, we had to build like
Speaker 2: a certain kind of confidence and trust in ourselves to
Speaker 2: be like, let me tell the truth and not be scared,
Speaker 2: and then tell this other person and then in turn
Speaker 2: tell all these other people. And it does. It creates
Speaker 2: a space where people were like, oh, these crazy bitches
Speaker 2: are talking about what they did and that they smoke
Speaker 2: weed or they went to Coachella and did this or
Speaker 2: whatever it is. But it creates a space where you
Speaker 2: know that, like, this is not a place you have
Speaker 2: to come perfect, you know, like this is just a
Speaker 2: place where you can come as human as you want to.
Speaker 2: And that has really created trust because you've heard me cry,
Speaker 2: You've heard me fuck up, heard us cheat, you've heard
Speaker 2: us like, you've heard all the things you know, like,
Speaker 2: and I am not one I even sitting here and
Speaker 2: having this conversation is like I'm like, I'm not. I
Speaker 2: can't believe that I've been vulnerable as vulnerable on like
Speaker 2: a public platform because that's not really Like I'm honest,
Speaker 2: but it's not my thing to be like crying in
Speaker 2: public amongst a bunch of strangers that I don't know.
Speaker 2: But it's like this is how genuine this faces that
Speaker 2: we just like there are times we really couldn't help it,
Speaker 2: you know, or like we're not trying to perform. It's
Speaker 2: not performative, it's not performative. It just is so like, yeah,
Speaker 2: the community is really why we have grown, like been
Speaker 2: so successful, and I'm so grateful, so so grateful because
Speaker 2: I realize like most of our community are not our
Speaker 2: personal friends.
Speaker 1: But they've been turned given us confidence as business owners
Speaker 1: and entrepreneurs. Like their support and your support has literally
Speaker 1: made me be fearless, has really made me write these
Speaker 1: chapters in this book and say fuck it. And and
Speaker 1: for me, like I feel like that's harder for me
Speaker 1: than it is for you, you know, Like I'm not,
Speaker 1: I'm a little bit like let me just wait, you know,
Speaker 1: but like I said when I sat when I sat
Speaker 1: down and wrote, you know, my parts of this book
Speaker 1: I said, like I've only given piece like parts and
Speaker 1: pieces a protecting certain people that I don't you know,
Speaker 1: I'm I think about my daughter and just like you know,
Speaker 1: the things that she might read about read later on
Speaker 1: in this book, I think about, you know, my child's father,
Speaker 1: and you know the ways that I continue still to like,
Speaker 1: you know, I don't want to say protect him but
Speaker 1: not give him power. Really was what it is in
Speaker 1: my voice and in my power in this space, because
Speaker 1: early on he wanted to attribute his he wanted to
Speaker 1: make it seem as though, like the reason why I
Speaker 1: have a podcast is because of him, which you know,
Speaker 1: you did make me a single mother, that's a fact, congratulations.
Speaker 1: But the tribe is what made has made me feel
Speaker 1: safe and saying you know what I'm gonna put it,
Speaker 1: I'm laying it all out, and I've laid it out here,
Speaker 1: but really writing it down has been like extremely powerful
Speaker 1: but made me feel confident. It's like this is my business,
Speaker 1: like whether I'm whether I say it or not, you know,
Speaker 1: and even creating the retreat, like me and Meil have
Speaker 1: never been on a retreat, just like we've never started
Speaker 1: a podcast, just like I've never opened up a podcast studio,
Speaker 1: just like I've never written a book, just like I've
Speaker 1: never been a mom or I've never designed jewelry or
Speaker 1: never designed clothes or jewelry.
Speaker 2: And like all the never's.
Speaker 1: They don't scare me anymore.
Speaker 2: I could do that. Yeah, everything I think of something
Speaker 2: that we don't have. In fact, I'm like, never done it,
Speaker 2: Fuck it, let's just do it. Let's try that. Yeah,
Speaker 2: have you ever started a cannabis business? Nope, No, no,
Speaker 2: never do that. I think we could do it. Yeah,
Speaker 2: we just do a little market research, you know, never
Speaker 2: styled a shoot, never made a deck. You know how
Speaker 2: many decks I've made for our various companies, how many pitches,
Speaker 2: how many times we've pitched ourselves for knows how many
Speaker 2: fucking emails LinkedIn's that we've like just searched, how many
Speaker 2: lists of brands we'd like to work with, how many
Speaker 2: knows we've gotten like a lot, a lot, a lot
Speaker 2: a lot. But I think just having clarity on what
Speaker 2: our brand was, and you're right, like the only reason
Speaker 2: we have clarity on what our brand was and that
Speaker 2: it's okay is that our community has said so. Like,
Speaker 2: like I said, We've had friends literally be like, I
Speaker 2: really don't like I think that like bad Choices is
Speaker 2: not a good name, and you know, saying all your
Speaker 2: business is not like like likable or people are not
Speaker 2: going to be associated with it, and brands telling us
Speaker 2: we're explicit or like having having titles like make Come
Speaker 2: Taste Good Again and what was it one with Kanye.
Speaker 1: Make America? Oh?
Speaker 2: Is that what the Rachel zoul is all? Yeah, Rachel
Speaker 2: zols Kanye some of our earlier on you.
Speaker 1: If you guys are just catching up on our show,
Speaker 1: I really would to encourage you to go to the beginning,
Speaker 1: because Wow.
Speaker 2: It's the wild wild West over there. It is the
Speaker 2: wild one.
Speaker 1: It's the wild wild West of podcasting. Not much has
Speaker 1: changed now, but I think we've just grown more. And
Speaker 1: like we were saying a lot about land as shit
Speaker 1: that you know, maybe one day we'll come back to
Speaker 1: haunt us. For example, how to tell if your man
Speaker 1: is gay or bye? Five ways to find out if
Speaker 1: your man is gay or bye, because we're experts, because
Speaker 1: we're super experts in that, and that is super duper
Speaker 1: I'm prosthetic in this in this climate this day, it was.
Speaker 2: Like my idea too, I said, I know I've wrote
Speaker 2: down some ideas, how about this, people, the girls are
Speaker 2: gonna lie this, and it was like, such stupid shit.
Speaker 2: If we put this arm like this, Oh my goodness,
Speaker 2: there's a lot of things in there that probably are
Speaker 2: not going to be popular next year and two years
Speaker 2: from now. I'm not popular right now, but honestly, we
Speaker 2: didn't start the podcast become popular. We started the podcast
Speaker 2: to find our people. And I've just learned that our
Speaker 2: people are our people, you know, even like I even
Speaker 2: going to the retreat, it's always a beautiful like example
Speaker 2: of like what a versatile like just community that we
Speaker 2: have because I know, like I know, like you know,
Speaker 2: we're obviously black, and we've said, like we talk about race,
Speaker 2: and we joke about race and spirituality and we make
Speaker 2: fun of a lot of shit because we're silly. But
Speaker 2: then like we go to the like retreat and there's
Speaker 2: so many different types of women for so many different places,
Speaker 2: and it reminds me that everybody gets our sense of humor.
Speaker 2: It's fine, everybody gets it, you know, everyone feels included
Speaker 2: and safe.
Speaker 1: Well there's that, but then there's also women that don't
Speaker 1: get it. But then they keep listening. Yeah, like there's
Speaker 1: been women that are like you triggered me when I
Speaker 1: first heard you. Yeah, like I actually really hated your voice.
Speaker 1: Your voice triggered the fuck out of me. But then
Speaker 1: I had to ask myself why, and so I kept
Speaker 1: listening shout out to Dutch so and I love that.
Speaker 1: I love those stories too, because it just really, it
Speaker 1: just it shows that a there is like there is
Speaker 1: something of value here that keeps people coming back, even
Speaker 1: if they don't necessarily subscribe to anything that we talk
Speaker 1: about anything any ways that we live, any ways that
Speaker 1: we raise our kids, any ways that we navigate our
Speaker 1: love lives, our relationships. But yet they still come back
Speaker 1: because there's something here that feels relatable, feels even if
Speaker 1: it's not relatable, it feels maybe aspirational at times. And
Speaker 1: I think a lot of times too, that's part of
Speaker 1: the business too. It's like people want to be inspired.
Speaker 2: I think people have this idea that there's like this.
Speaker 2: I mean, in ways, there are this level of fearlessness,
Speaker 2: you know, because we are saying things like people usually
Speaker 2: don't say, I'm being like incredibly honest and all those things,
Speaker 2: but like, I am really really scared about our book
Speaker 2: coming out. I am getting increasingly more anxious. And it's
Speaker 2: something different about like that black and white printed you
Speaker 2: can turn the page and put it in my face
Speaker 2: and I have to read it like I'm I'm really
Speaker 2: really scared and I've like I'm anxious about it, you know,
Speaker 2: And I realized, like damn, I gotta go like talk
Speaker 2: to people and let them know it's coming, and that
Speaker 2: I've said certain things, and like.
Speaker 1: Same, there's some people. There's certain people I'm not going
Speaker 1: to talk to. You can just read it, yeah, but
Speaker 1: there are certain people that I feel like deserve to know,
Speaker 1: like what I've shared, whether or not I've already shared
Speaker 1: it on the podcast or not. Like it's our book
Speaker 1: is actually out for pre order now. Click the link
Speaker 1: in this episode description to pre order our book. But yeah,
Speaker 1: it's printed and it's coming out and I can't take
Speaker 1: it back, and I don't want to take it back.
Speaker 2: I think the biggest lesson in this entire thing is
Speaker 2: like feel the fear and do it anyway. Feel the
Speaker 2: fear and do it anyway. Like I'm scared as fuck,
Speaker 2: but it's coming, Like like I get like all this
Speaker 2: shit is new to me, Like I've like you said
Speaker 2: I've never run a studio, We've never done a lot
Speaker 2: of shit. It's all new, you know, I've never had
Speaker 2: a team of ten people. That's never happened. And then
Speaker 2: like it's just something that just like we've risen to
Speaker 2: the occasion. We never fucking put a podcast out edited video,
Speaker 2: but we did. And I think like the biggest lesson
Speaker 2: of all this is like, if you want to do it,
Speaker 2: just do it and stop stop letting fear like stop
Speaker 2: you from even starting. You've got to do the shit
Speaker 2: and then once you get there, you figure it out.
Speaker 2: And I'm scared right now. I'm scared yesterday. I'm scared
Speaker 2: next week. But I'm not gonna not do it. You know,
Speaker 2: Like everything is going to be scary, especially the older
Speaker 2: you get, you have more I have, the stakes are higher.
Speaker 2: But one of my biggest things is like I would
Speaker 2: hate to grow old and like about to be out
Speaker 2: this bitch and then have like Matt, like have so much,
Speaker 2: uh have so much like disappointment about things I wish
Speaker 2: I would have done. That's my biggest fear in life,
Speaker 2: always has been, is like I would hate to get
Speaker 2: to the end of this bitch and be like I
Speaker 2: should have could have would have.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I should have tried this. I should have tried that.
Speaker 1: I should have put that on. I should have just
Speaker 1: fucking said I don't care, like I'm going to show
Speaker 1: up this way. And I'm still working through those things too,
Speaker 1: Like there's certain parts of my of who I am
Speaker 1: that I still feel like I could show up even
Speaker 1: more authentically, and and it's the fear.
Speaker 2: Is still there.
Speaker 1: I don't know, I feel like it's like a constant
Speaker 1: evolution too, because I'm constantly growing and finding out new
Speaker 1: parts of about myself and.
Speaker 2: And how to cope with them, how to cope with that,
Speaker 2: you know, how to cope with the fear and like
Speaker 2: live with it. I literally was like, do I need
Speaker 2: a call my therapist? But maybe shit? But like it's
Speaker 2: the doing it anyway.
Speaker 1: Yeah, there's just so many and there's just so many
Speaker 1: things too, like in this world too, that like they
Speaker 1: feed us and they show us like, hey you can
Speaker 1: try this, Hey you can try that, Like want to
Speaker 1: try this, want to try that, And there's certain things
Speaker 1: I'm like, all right, I don't try that.
Speaker 2: But they also make you feel like you can only
Speaker 2: be good at one thing, you know, like even like
Speaker 2: I've done it, Like, oh, you know, I do this,
Speaker 2: I do that. I'm a dancer, I make I'm a cook.
Speaker 2: I also do me Like, oh, I could do use security,
Speaker 2: Like you got to choose one, but you don't, you know,
Speaker 2: you could do it. You could do them all. You
Speaker 2: can make one business and make them all and make
Speaker 2: it all makes sense. It's not like no one can
Speaker 2: tell you what you're good at except you, And it's
Speaker 2: like it's unfortunate that we think that we needed like
Speaker 2: a certain level of I don't know, like I don't know,
Speaker 2: cerification or title or success us in order to say
Speaker 2: you're an artist or you're this or you're that. But like, yeah,
Speaker 2: you can beat there with the fuck you want to be.
Speaker 1: Yeah. I do, though, think that you need to You
Speaker 1: can't be good at everything all at once, though, Like
Speaker 1: you do have to like decide what you're gonna do.
Speaker 2: You can one thing at a time. Yeah. Yeah, we've
Speaker 2: definitely shifted a lot, but mostly we like we've been
Speaker 2: consistent as fuck with this and then we're like let's
Speaker 2: try this and see how this goes, and let's try this,
Speaker 2: but like first let's get a good grip on this.
Speaker 2: And the podcast has been like our our rock, our
Speaker 2: foundation has.
Speaker 1: I just feel like people look at certain people's successes
Speaker 1: and they think they're special, like they've been given something special,
Speaker 1: and like I can't do that. I don't know how
Speaker 1: to do that. And I think I'm here to say
Speaker 1: like there's really nothing so unique or special about me
Speaker 1: or Jamila, like.
Speaker 2: No, we are special and unique, but so are you.
Speaker 1: We are but just I just I'm more so mean
Speaker 1: to say.
Speaker 2: We're not doing anything that you can't do or no
Speaker 2: one else can do. And that used to be my
Speaker 2: most annoying part of watching award shows when people would
Speaker 2: think people and they're like, I just want to say
Speaker 2: that anyone can do this, and I'd be like, bait,
Speaker 2: shut up, bere at the Academy Awards. But but now
Speaker 2: I get it. I actually get it, and I think
Speaker 2: we are just so blessed that we we realized early
Speaker 2: that our gift is just literally showing up as ourselves. Yeah,
Speaker 2: as weird, as fucking quirky, as like as triggering as
Speaker 2: it can be for some people. I know people hate
Speaker 2: when we say nigga, you know, like, I'm sure there's
Speaker 2: a lot of shit that irritates us about people like
Speaker 2: that's a part of being human. I might remind you
Speaker 2: of somebody something about me might like same with Erica,
Speaker 2: Like there are so many there are so many factors,
Speaker 2: but it doesn't fucking matter. Like showing up as your
Speaker 2: complete self is like I think half the battle, especially
Speaker 2: if you want to you want to pursue a career
Speaker 2: in something that doesn't feel against who you are. I
Speaker 2: feel like if you want to feel like follow I
Speaker 2: think anything. When you follow your purpose, it's gonna be
Speaker 2: so aligned with who you are. It's not gonna hurt
Speaker 2: to get up and go every day. It's not gonna
Speaker 2: be a go against everything, you know what I mean.
Speaker 2: Like when we're at the retreat, I'm literally like leading
Speaker 2: a mushroom ceremony and I'm topless, like being super serious
Speaker 2: in a like sister circle, like everybody, can everyone take
Speaker 2: deep breaths? I literally I want to go. Yeah, we're
Speaker 2: both the titties out, titties out in the jungle like
Speaker 2: and like then our women, the women are like can
Speaker 2: I think I need to get naked? I'm like a
Speaker 2: naked yeah. And I'm just like spreading sage around naked
Speaker 2: women while they're just so freaking their bodies and comfortable
Speaker 2: in the jungle. I'm like, I did this. I didn't
Speaker 2: I sent out the siren to call these women to
Speaker 2: come feel so comfortable and so themselves that they said
Speaker 2: fuck it at three o'clock on the afternoon in the jungle,
Speaker 2: in the middle of the yoga shalla, I'm about to
Speaker 2: get butt ass naked and listen to these sambals with
Speaker 2: Milan Erica, Like, ha, do we not said all the
Speaker 2: weird shit we've done, told all the stupid stories, like
Speaker 2: all the dumb shit. Maybe someone would would feel like
Speaker 2: weird about showing up and like doing these weird things.
Speaker 2: Like you guys, we were like very weird women. But
Speaker 2: we but we.
Speaker 1: Go through all the same exacttion as everyone else. Like
Speaker 1: I bleed, I fucking sometimes I pee on myself.
Speaker 2: Oh my god, I've told I totally freak somebody out.
Speaker 2: I'm pretty sure everyone was, Like I try to like
Speaker 2: take it to wait till like day three to get
Speaker 2: too weird at the retreat, you know, but like I
Speaker 2: really had to pee, Like we really had to pee,
Speaker 2: And there's so much grass everywhere, so I'm like I'm
Speaker 2: not walking all over there, so I just gently walk
Speaker 2: my ass up the yoga shalla into the grass, squatted
Speaker 2: over the grass and pull my bathing suit to the
Speaker 2: side and pete in the grass. And I saw someone
Speaker 2: look over at me like huh, and I'm like yeah,
Speaker 2: I'm yeah, sorry. I'm not sorry though, because we don't
Speaker 2: say sorry. It's a retreat. But I got a pee
Speaker 2: and it's the most human nature thing. But like my
Speaker 2: bladder is very is not as unreliable at this point.
Speaker 2: I don't know if it's because I'm thirty five. I'm
Speaker 2: about to be thirty five. Well that's why you need
Speaker 2: to do yard lab. That's why you need to try
Speaker 2: yard lab. Oh you know what I did. I tried
Speaker 2: it a little bit and it's so weird you don't
Speaker 2: even feel it.
Speaker 1: I know, no, because bitch, last time, I was in
Speaker 1: Costa Rica. Do you remember when I was in the
Speaker 1: grocery store and like you guys, this is really embarrassing.
Speaker 1: This is we're going off topic real quick. But I
Speaker 1: was in the grocery store at Costa Rica and I
Speaker 1: don't know if it's because it's warm there or like
Speaker 1: I'm thirty five now, I was thirty four at that point,
Speaker 1: but I'm sitting and I'm like, but I'm like looking
Speaker 1: at bread and I'm like I look down and I'm like,
Speaker 1: did I what is what? What is running down my life?
Speaker 1: And I realized that I was peeing myself?
Speaker 2: Yeah, and I was.
Speaker 1: Like, what the fuck is this?
Speaker 2: Did you feel like you had to pee? No? Like
Speaker 2: that was the weirdest part of all.
Speaker 1: And like when I was out there, like I was
Speaker 1: feeling like that kept happening, Like I don't know, It's
Speaker 1: like sometimes I've heard that there's like anxiety induced incontinents.
Speaker 2: Oh for sure for me in my own anxiety, and.
Speaker 1: I would like to think like I'm at my lowest
Speaker 1: anxiety when I'm in Costa Rica. However, at that point
Speaker 1: in the retreat business, we were doing absolutely every fucking thing,
Speaker 1: including holding space for like fifty women. So probably what
Speaker 1: did have a little bit of anxiety? You have anxiety,
Speaker 1: But no, I've been I've been not since then, but
Speaker 1: recently I've been starting to use yr lap And you know,
Speaker 1: I feel like talking about the pelvic floor muscle, like
Speaker 1: women get really weird about this, but it's something that
Speaker 1: like we all experience, especially as you get older. You
Speaker 1: don't even have to have a child to have in
Speaker 1: continents like you bitch, you know, if you sneeze and
Speaker 1: you be on your yourself a little bit, you know
Speaker 1: what the fuck I'm talking about. If you have to
Speaker 1: wear pantyliners in your thong daily, you know what I'm
Speaker 1: talking about, and that really can fuck with like your
Speaker 1: mental and like, granted I haven't gotten there yet, but
Speaker 1: I was not about to get there, and so I
Speaker 1: started using your lap and literally I just like put
Speaker 1: it in. I read a book and it does these
Speaker 1: kegel exercises for me. It's actually I barely feel it,
Speaker 1: and I had no problems ever since. Girl. Well, in fact,
Speaker 1: my orgasms are much stronger because I have been also
Speaker 1: trying to in this new year, my goal was to
Speaker 1: stop using vibrators because I'm a slave to my vibrator.
Speaker 2: Specifically the rose mine broke.
Speaker 1: So thought it's probably for the best, honestly, like I
Speaker 1: really love the rose shout out to anyone who gave
Speaker 1: us one. But I started to feel like my pussy
Speaker 1: was getting desensitized, Like for real, I was like when
Speaker 1: I touched my pussy with my hands, like I would
Speaker 1: get frustrated, like the fact that it was like taking
Speaker 1: longer than I wanted to get. So I've been really
Speaker 1: trying to focus on, you know, self pleasuring, especially in
Speaker 1: school in Tandra school, Like you're not telling you to
Speaker 1: use the death's definitely encouraging you to use your hands.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and I was cheating. I mean. The thing for me,
Speaker 2: it's so crazy, is like there there are so many
Speaker 2: things that women are trained to, you know, condition to
Speaker 2: keep up, you know, like get botox, get all the
Speaker 2: all the highest skincare, go to the gym, you know,
Speaker 2: like like all these things you do yoga, all these
Speaker 2: things that we do to take care of ourselves our hair,
Speaker 2: our nails, our skin, just to keep it like up
Speaker 2: to par, taking vitamins, but we forget about our woman,
Speaker 2: our pelvic floor, and like these are the things that
Speaker 2: support us through our lives. Birding babies, having orgasms, like
Speaker 2: the most two important things that are like our bodies
Speaker 2: perform and we don't think to do the necessary exercises
Speaker 2: and like hegels are one of them. It's not like
Speaker 2: we don't know what they are, we just forget to
Speaker 2: do them. And even like yeah, in Tantry school, it's
Speaker 2: like a part of a lot of the meditations is
Speaker 2: like extra like holding in your keegel floor and exercising
Speaker 2: and doing your kegels and so especially like for me,
Speaker 2: when I like I can, I'll be holding pee, but
Speaker 2: like that very last moment, as soon as like I
Speaker 2: can see the toilet, my bladder's like, aha, fuck you,
Speaker 2: I'm kidding, Like I'm like, oh, am, I I'm too
Speaker 2: old for this, right, Like why am I peeling my
Speaker 2: pants a little bit? And hopefully I'm.
Speaker 1: Not worry you're not using your lap, bitch.
Speaker 2: I know I'm gonna go use my yar lap because
Speaker 2: I definitely sprinkle a little bit and hopefully, like that's
Speaker 2: another reason I've been wearing panties because if I don't
Speaker 2: or panties and I'm really fucked, and if I'm wearing
Speaker 2: a skirt or something, it's just it's just it's a
Speaker 2: real thing.
Speaker 1: And women really, like I feel like women like really
Speaker 1: suffer in silence around so many things when it comes
Speaker 1: to you know, our womb our pussies, like whether it's
Speaker 1: the scent, whether it's how it feels, is it tight enough?
Speaker 1: Am I peeing on myself? Can I squirt? Is that pee?
Speaker 2: Like the don't look like that other pussy is my pussy.
Speaker 1: Is my pussy lips too long? Are they too short?
Speaker 1: Like you know, is it like there's ween?
Speaker 2: Is it too dry?
Speaker 1: Yeah? It tastes good, but there is I feel like
Speaker 1: pussy upkeep and we ignore it because we just are
Speaker 1: ashamed or we feel like, h I'll get to it.
Speaker 1: Or maybe it was just that one partner, maybe like
Speaker 1: he's just not pleasing me, and it's like, no, bitch,
Speaker 1: your pelvic floor is falling and.
Speaker 2: You gotta you gotta work on her, work on her. Yeah,
Speaker 2: it's like she's worth keeping up too, and it's not
Speaker 2: something to ignore. We are so trained to ignore our
Speaker 2: entire like beneath our belly buttons. You know, it's like
Speaker 2: you want to be too sexual, it would be over like,
Speaker 2: but it's it needs to be cared for. And it's
Speaker 2: true your love makes it super easy. So there's no
Speaker 2: need to like suffer in silence anymore. There's no need
Speaker 2: to ignore her. Like she's a part of you, she's important,
Speaker 2: she deserves pleasure and like sometimes like you need to
Speaker 2: put a little little extra work.
Speaker 1: And I'm here to say I think when you start
Speaker 1: really acknowledging your womb, you become even more and more
Speaker 1: powerful in all spaces, including business, like including how you
Speaker 1: show up in your relationships, including just feeling overall empowered.
Speaker 1: I know it sounds crazy like to kind of like
Speaker 1: blend those two things together.
Speaker 2: Emily said from week one. She said, I had a
Speaker 2: premonition that our power is directly connected to our womb,
Speaker 2: and we forget that. If we ignore our womb, we
Speaker 2: are not in contact with our power. We're not like
Speaker 2: we're not We're ignoring parts of ourselves and in one
Speaker 2: of the most powerful parts. You will forget your own
Speaker 2: power if you're not connected with her, and society will
Speaker 2: already make us do that.
Speaker 1: I think even just like overall health in general is
Speaker 1: so important when you are trying to be successful, like
Speaker 1: you can't You can't expect to be able to really
Speaker 1: fully nurture your creativity, your ideas, your passions. If you're
Speaker 1: not taking care of yourself like you kill but you're
Speaker 1: not at your you're not going to be operating at
Speaker 1: your highest capacity.
Speaker 2: Now that we've we're at this point where we have
Speaker 2: so much shit going on, I realize like the importance
Speaker 2: of just taking care of my mind, body, soul, or
Speaker 2: else I'm not gonna be able to keep up all
Speaker 2: the all the work I've put into all the manifesting.
Speaker 2: If like, if I get to this point and I have,
Speaker 2: if I haven't cared for myself spiritually and in health,
Speaker 2: like I'm going to be fucked. I'm not gonna be
Speaker 2: able to keep up with all this momentum because we
Speaker 2: all we are moving really quickly. And I realize, like, okay,
Speaker 2: but you need to go have a seat and breathe,
Speaker 2: but you need to go, like you need to wash
Speaker 2: your face at night. You know, we're moisturizer. Okay, Like
Speaker 2: it's like it's true. I'm like, wow, I'm an adult.
Speaker 2: I need to I need to fucking moisturize my hands
Speaker 2: and my neck.
Speaker 1: I realized the spiritual aspects has been missing, kind of
Speaker 1: missing in my in my life. You know, we talk
Speaker 1: a lot about that. But like the dedication to my
Speaker 1: practices I feel like has really helped me in the
Speaker 1: last few months immensely, especially even as a business owner.
Speaker 1: My patience and like my optimism, like it's just different
Speaker 1: like I was. You know, we did this challenge with
Speaker 1: open the Open app in January that really like set
Speaker 1: me up for the rest for this year. And then
Speaker 1: I continued off. I continue to do it in February,
Speaker 1: and then I came back from Costa Rica and I
Speaker 1: went a few days without, you know, doing my practices,
Speaker 1: and I was like, I actually and then I meditated
Speaker 1: actually today, and I was like, okay, no, I cannot
Speaker 1: fall off. I'm not starting back all over again, Like
Speaker 1: I am not doing this to myself. It's like when
Speaker 1: you start exercising and you get to a point where're like,
Speaker 1: I feel good and then you like want to fall
Speaker 1: fuck and fall off and you have to start all
Speaker 1: over again. Like that's the same shit when it comes
Speaker 1: to like your the dedication to your practices. And I
Speaker 1: am was like, no, bitch, come back, come back. And
Speaker 1: even today's meditation was whack as hill. Okay, I was like,
Speaker 1: I didn't meditate, shit, I sat there, I did something,
Speaker 1: but it's okay. I know that, like at least I
Speaker 1: dedicated that fifteen minutes of time to just even if
Speaker 1: I was even if I was sitting in silence and
Speaker 1: my mind was going to this, this, this, and that,
Speaker 1: I still sat down and said, Okay, I'm this is
Speaker 1: my this is my practice, and I'm doing it. And
Speaker 1: I think, like you have to carve out time for
Speaker 1: those practices while you're trying to nurture and build a business.
Speaker 1: You can do without it, but like that's one thing
Speaker 1: that I'm learning right now. It's really hard to do
Speaker 1: it later. That's what I'm thinking learning right now. That's
Speaker 1: been super transformational. And just like honestly, like, yeah, believing
Speaker 1: in whatever it is, what you believe in, whether that's
Speaker 1: a god, whether that's whatever it is, Like having an
Speaker 1: anchor is really really important because if you don't have
Speaker 1: an ancher, you don't have faith, then none of this
Speaker 1: shit is gonna work out.
Speaker 2: It's so true. And it's that's my that's hard as
Speaker 2: hell for me, like to take time for myself and
Speaker 2: just to like to be like this is you're gonna
Speaker 2: be half later because I get super anxious and then
Speaker 2: I'm like, bitch, because you haven't carved out time. It's hard,
Speaker 2: but it's for you. You know, you do it for
Speaker 2: your kid, you do it for everybody else, and it's
Speaker 2: like are how important are you to you? And like
Speaker 2: that's difficult for me, But I also realize like if
Speaker 2: I want to have longevity, then I absolutely have to
Speaker 2: do it or else I'm going to fuck myself and
Speaker 2: I'm not going to be able to keep up, and
Speaker 2: my thoughts are going to move really quickly, and I'm
Speaker 2: going to be super anxious about if I told everybody
Speaker 2: in the book what I said, and like all these things,
Speaker 2: and it's like I've realized at this point, it's like, bitch,
Speaker 2: there's nothing like you gotta either like to step into it,
Speaker 2: or you're gonna constantly be living in the present, living
Speaker 2: in the past, living in the future, and you're going
Speaker 2: to be anxious all the time, like worrying about things
Speaker 2: that don't need to be worried about, wasting time, wasting
Speaker 2: time in the present, worrying about shit that you can't change.
Speaker 2: Is a waste of fucking time. Mm hmm. It's like
Speaker 2: a waste of your life because there's always gonna be
Speaker 2: something to be stressed about, always, forever always.
Speaker 1: I finished my meditation and then I was like, don't
Speaker 1: look at your phone. Don't look at your phone, because.
Speaker 2: You're gonna get And then I was there stressing.
Speaker 1: So I waited like ten minutes, and you know, my
Speaker 1: meditation kind of went to shit because we had a
Speaker 1: little hiccup today and I was like raw, and.
Speaker 2: I wasn't helping, like hyping you up, and then Luna
Speaker 2: was hyping me up. So it's just you don't like that.
Speaker 2: I was waiting for you to give me the light.
Speaker 2: I felt like if I held it, you would have
Speaker 2: a lighter.
Speaker 3: You had it, it was green, Oh, I have it?
Speaker 2: Okay. Anyway, do you have any other money business advice
Speaker 2: you'd like to give the people for money March?
Speaker 1: Just whatever is a value to you. If whatever, if
Speaker 1: you've had something, if there's something that you find valuable,
Speaker 1: other people will find it valuable too. You just have
Speaker 1: to figure out how to make it easily digestible, Like
Speaker 1: do you think we made it easily digestible. I think
Speaker 1: there's been times, Yes, yes I do. But I also
Speaker 1: think that there's been times where like we've you know,
Speaker 1: overthought things. And that's that's one thing I know about us.
Speaker 1: Don't let us sit on some shit for too long,
Speaker 1: Like we're not good at that. We're not good with
Speaker 1: those kind of things we are really good at, like
Speaker 1: quick intuitive decision making. Like if you let me sit
Speaker 1: with a decision for too long, I'm gonna over fucking
Speaker 1: think it and then it's gonna get fucked up. You know,
Speaker 1: like like you just but that's not always everyone else's,
Speaker 1: you know, way that they process things. You know, I
Speaker 1: think in when we have that reading with Aaron Claire Jones,
Speaker 1: she's a human design expert. She came on our show
Speaker 1: and gave us our human design I'm a projector Jamalism manifestor.
Speaker 1: I realized that that's my superpower.
Speaker 2: It is.
Speaker 1: I always knew it, but I thought like, well, maybe
Speaker 1: I'm I shouldn't be so instinctive, like I should just
Speaker 1: there or what's not non instinctive? What's the word where
Speaker 1: you're like make decisions too quickly?
Speaker 2: You know what I mean?
Speaker 1: Hey, that word? But that's when I make my best choices,
Speaker 1: Like my first mind is always the best mind. So
Speaker 1: you know, find whatever you find value in. Start there.
Speaker 1: Like if you're like I don't know what, I don't
Speaker 1: know what my calling is, whatever, what do you find
Speaker 1: value in?
Speaker 2: What is it that?
Speaker 1: Like? What is the problem you're trying to solve in
Speaker 1: your everyday life?
Speaker 3: You know?
Speaker 1: For me, it was like I needed to someone who
Speaker 1: could relate to my experience. That was the problem I
Speaker 1: was trying to solve. That was what I needed. And
Speaker 1: so when I met Jamila I was like, boom, that's it.
Speaker 1: I started there and then everything else kind of manifested
Speaker 1: from there. You know, our our retreat business has been
Speaker 1: wildly successful. We've only had this business for a year,
Speaker 1: one fucking year. People think people like, you've only done
Speaker 1: it for a year, but like, you've been doing this
Speaker 1: for years. I'm like, no, bitch, it's been one year,
Speaker 1: one year, and we've made a great amount of money.
Speaker 1: You know, that's been able to support us. It's been
Speaker 1: able to support our dreams, it's been able to support
Speaker 1: our kids, and you know, even more so than the
Speaker 1: podcast for.
Speaker 2: Sure, You guys, Podcasting doesn't make you rich. Podcasting will
Speaker 2: not make you rich unless you're fucking Joe Budden and
Speaker 2: fucking but other than Joe, Joe Rogan.
Speaker 1: And even Like and even Joe Like, they have different
Speaker 1: legs to their things are making money while they sleep.
Speaker 2: That is the secret.
Speaker 1: You will always be working day to day if you
Speaker 1: haven't figured out how to make money while you sleep.
Speaker 1: I don't know where I saw that quote online or something,
Speaker 1: but it's true. You have to have multiple streams of
Speaker 1: income or else you're just going to be a slave
Speaker 1: to your nine to five Unless you want to be
Speaker 1: a slave too. Nine to five. Some people really like
Speaker 1: that lifestyle, and that's cool. You're not a slave to
Speaker 1: me though. For me, I feel like a slave in
Speaker 1: that way. I need flex I need creativity. I need
Speaker 1: to be creating on some on a few different realms
Speaker 1: in order to feel fulfilled. So that's how I feel.
Speaker 2: I'm pulling all these crazy cards. I streight and pull
Speaker 2: another one. Then this one came.
Speaker 1: I don't know how to pull the death card, but yeah,
Speaker 1: I know that's it. Just dreams. Find something of value.
Speaker 1: The money will come be. Just make take one step
Speaker 1: at a time, work towards your goals, one thing every
Speaker 1: single day. Make sure you take care of your mind, body,
Speaker 1: and soul, and your pelvic floor most importantly, your mind, body, soul,
Speaker 1: pelvic floor very very important, even for the men's you
Speaker 1: guys have public floors.
Speaker 2: Also.
Speaker 1: You need to do kegels also, and maybe do some
Speaker 1: steaming retention to put your put that chi energy back
Speaker 1: inside of you, because some of you guys are really
Speaker 1: fucking depleted. Edging, not even edging, because edging, at some
Speaker 1: point you release, I mean, don't calm, nigga, put that
Speaker 1: ship back inside. Let that ship go back to your brain.
Speaker 1: Maybe you'll be a little bucking smarter. Maybe ye know,
Speaker 1: so we pulled to is a tarot time I pulled
Speaker 1: the seven swords, I'm gonna read it reverse. Maybe this
Speaker 1: is for somebody listening.
Speaker 2: Trying to read it any other way than they can read.
Speaker 2: The seven of swords often appears reversed when you feel
Speaker 2: like a fraud and are suffering from imposter syndrome. You
Speaker 2: may doubt yourself and your abilities. For example, if you
Speaker 2: have started a new business, you may ask yourself, who
Speaker 2: am I to be doing that? Know that this is
Speaker 2: fear talking, Get out of your head and trust that
Speaker 2: you have everything you need to make a new venture
Speaker 2: six us. Similarly, the seven of Storis reverse can suggest
Speaker 2: that you are deceiving yourself, trying to trick yourself into
Speaker 2: believing something even though it is out of integrity with
Speaker 2: your true self. Integrity with your true self, You may
Speaker 2: attempt to fool yourself that everything is okay when it
Speaker 2: does not. You now it is time to get real
Speaker 2: with where you are and confront your situation head on.
Speaker 2: As a card of inner deceit, the reverse seven of
Speaker 2: swords represents keeping his secrets hidden from others. You may
Speaker 2: be harboring a dark secret that you will you hope
Speaker 2: will never be revealed. Keeping the secret may bring you
Speaker 2: stress and tension, along with deeper feelings of guilt and shame.
Speaker 2: While the thought of confessing may be horrifying, it will
Speaker 2: free you from the negative emotions you're experiencing. First, forgive yourself,
Speaker 2: then confide in someone you trust you will not doubt.
Speaker 2: You will not doubt feel much lighter as you will
Speaker 2: no doubt feel much lighter as a result.
Speaker 1: So stop lying to yourself. Be honest with yourself. Are
Speaker 1: you happy with where you're at? Also, know you are capable.
Speaker 2: You can do it.
Speaker 1: You don't have to like look at other people and
Speaker 1: seek outwardly and doubt yourself because you see other people's successes.
Speaker 1: That's super easy to do on Instagram. It's super easy
Speaker 1: to do just looking anywhere where you see people you
Speaker 1: know getting the things that you want or you feel
Speaker 1: like you deserve.
Speaker 2: I pulled the death card after it says death is
Speaker 2: probably the most figured and misunderstood of all the cards
Speaker 2: in the deck. Most people freak out word. They will
Speaker 2: suddenly kneel over and die as soon as this card apires. Relaxed.
Speaker 2: The death card can be one of the most positive
Speaker 2: cards in the deck after a period of pause and
Speaker 2: reflection with the hanged man. The death card symbolizes the
Speaker 2: end of a major phase or aspect of your life
Speaker 2: that you realize is no longer serving you, opening up
Speaker 2: the possibility of something far more valuable and essential. You
Speaker 2: must close one door to open another. You need to
Speaker 2: put the past behind you in part ways, ready to
Speaker 2: embrace new opportunities and possibilities. It may be difficult to
Speaker 2: let go of the past, but you will soon see
Speaker 2: its importance and the promise of renewal and transformation. If
Speaker 2: you resist these necessary endings, you may experience pain, both
Speaker 2: emotionally and physically. But if you exercise your imagination and
Speaker 2: visualize a new possibility, you allow more constructive patterns to emerge. Hmm,
Speaker 2: don't play yourself, Stop playing yourself? Do you have any
Speaker 2: anything else to add to the podcast?
Speaker 1: My Love? Fuck the Fear and do it anyway?
Speaker 2: Fuck the fear and do it any motherfucking way. Yolo.
Speaker 1: Well, you guys hopefully know where to find us, but
Speaker 1: if not, make sure you go follow us at Good
Speaker 1: Mom's Underscore Bad Choices, check out our retreat. We just
Speaker 1: and we announced our new retreat, our next retreat, which
Speaker 1: is in a new location, Mexico. I'm almost saw you
Speaker 1: lead the Maico. It's Peblo Magico Michicel and you're I know,
Speaker 1: and it's gonna be amazing. If you have been thinking
Speaker 1: about taking a summer vacation with your girls, come through.
Speaker 1: If you need to find your tribe, come through. If
Speaker 1: you need an excuse to get away, come through. We'll
Speaker 1: be there and it's always a vibe, So make sure
Speaker 1: you check out at the Good Vibe Retreat for those dates,
Speaker 1: or to click the link in this episode description. Please please,
Speaker 1: please please go pre.
Speaker 2: Order our book, please right now. Just do it.
Speaker 1: It means so much to us.
Speaker 2: Please just do it. Thanks. Buy it for a friend too.
Speaker 1: Yeah, buy it for a mom. If you're not a
Speaker 1: mom by buy it for a mom, Buy it for
Speaker 1: a new mom. This is really a book that I
Speaker 1: wish that I had prior to having a child, honestly,
Speaker 1: not even like yeah, like even prior to having a kid.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean, I wish I would have could have
Speaker 2: come on handing in a lot of points prior to
Speaker 2: having a kid, having a kid, being newly single as
Speaker 2: a mom. It could have come in.
Speaker 1: Handy many many Yeah, there's many points in which this
Speaker 1: book could have I feel helped me, But.
Speaker 2: I made all the mistakes for you. So give it
Speaker 2: to a friend, save her.
Speaker 1: I guess that's it. Check out our merch on our
Speaker 1: website and support to black baby mamas.
Speaker 2: Bye bye, m H.
Speaker 1: This is yo Ellena j solo ball recorded
Speaker 2: Elas