1 00:00:00,760 --> 00:00:05,000 Speaker 1: Scrubbing In with Becca Tilly and Tanya rat An iHeartRadio podcast. 2 00:00:07,040 --> 00:00:09,399 Speaker 2: Hello, everybody, we are scrubbing it. 3 00:00:10,080 --> 00:00:11,160 Speaker 3: Grub a dub dub. 4 00:00:11,720 --> 00:00:13,760 Speaker 2: We have a very fun guest today. 5 00:00:14,080 --> 00:00:15,880 Speaker 3: I'm really excited about this girl. 6 00:00:16,120 --> 00:00:16,520 Speaker 4: Me too. 7 00:00:16,960 --> 00:00:18,840 Speaker 2: A lot of you know her from selling Sunset. She's 8 00:00:18,880 --> 00:00:21,919 Speaker 2: a luxury real estate expert. She's a model and actress. 9 00:00:22,239 --> 00:00:25,280 Speaker 2: She has really been all over your TVs. 10 00:00:25,040 --> 00:00:26,560 Speaker 3: Yes, especially HGTV. 11 00:00:26,720 --> 00:00:31,160 Speaker 1: She has the Flipping Almosa's, she has the hit competition series, 12 00:00:31,160 --> 00:00:36,720 Speaker 1: The Flip Off, and she's just an all around outstanding goal. 13 00:00:37,200 --> 00:00:38,640 Speaker 4: And I feel like you'll have a lot in common. 14 00:00:38,720 --> 00:00:39,440 Speaker 3: We have a lot. 15 00:00:39,840 --> 00:00:42,159 Speaker 1: I was reading her bio and reading up about her, 16 00:00:42,159 --> 00:00:44,279 Speaker 1: and I just feel as though I'm talking to. 17 00:00:45,920 --> 00:00:46,440 Speaker 3: Myself. 18 00:00:46,479 --> 00:00:47,120 Speaker 4: It's a mirror. 19 00:00:47,159 --> 00:00:47,839 Speaker 5: It's a mirror. 20 00:00:47,920 --> 00:00:49,960 Speaker 2: Well, let's bring her in and get the conversation going. 21 00:00:50,040 --> 00:00:52,240 Speaker 2: Everyone welcome Heather ray Elms. 22 00:00:56,160 --> 00:00:59,520 Speaker 4: Hello, Yeah, she just walked in. 23 00:01:01,600 --> 00:01:04,920 Speaker 3: We don't get many gifts as podcasters, No, we do. 24 00:01:04,920 --> 00:01:06,360 Speaker 4: Not very rare gifts. 25 00:01:06,680 --> 00:01:08,679 Speaker 5: Yeah, well this won't be the last time I'll send 26 00:01:08,680 --> 00:01:09,360 Speaker 5: you guys some more. 27 00:01:10,760 --> 00:01:12,679 Speaker 3: So nice. I put the I put mine on. 28 00:01:12,760 --> 00:01:15,920 Speaker 1: I got the color Honey Bunny, the lippy Lippy gloss 29 00:01:16,080 --> 00:01:17,680 Speaker 1: and I feel like gorgeous. 30 00:01:17,680 --> 00:01:21,319 Speaker 2: I've put Honey Bunny onto and it's it is the 31 00:01:21,360 --> 00:01:24,480 Speaker 2: brain with Love Heather. 32 00:01:25,280 --> 00:01:26,759 Speaker 5: My little thing is like with Love Heather. 33 00:01:26,920 --> 00:01:27,759 Speaker 4: It's so cute. 34 00:01:27,840 --> 00:01:32,440 Speaker 2: The packaging is yeah, really cute, feels good, it smells good, 35 00:01:32,760 --> 00:01:33,280 Speaker 2: tastes good. 36 00:01:35,319 --> 00:01:41,280 Speaker 1: Oh so I've never met you before. You give you 37 00:01:41,319 --> 00:01:43,639 Speaker 1: give me a girls girl energy. 38 00:01:43,760 --> 00:01:47,720 Speaker 5: I am like you, you have that like that thing. 39 00:01:48,040 --> 00:01:51,160 Speaker 5: I just feel like women should support women through everything. 40 00:01:51,640 --> 00:01:54,800 Speaker 3: I feel like selling Sunset was the opposite. 41 00:01:54,320 --> 00:01:55,360 Speaker 4: Of that energy. 42 00:01:55,640 --> 00:01:59,280 Speaker 5: But so, did you guys watch the show? No, okay, 43 00:01:59,320 --> 00:02:01,320 Speaker 5: did you watch it? No, just so we I just 44 00:02:01,480 --> 00:02:05,480 Speaker 5: know I know about drama. Yeah, so if you watch, 45 00:02:05,840 --> 00:02:08,400 Speaker 5: you'll see, like I'm very different than all the girls. 46 00:02:09,040 --> 00:02:11,440 Speaker 5: So I'm like I was friends with everyone. I kind 47 00:02:11,440 --> 00:02:13,359 Speaker 5: of kept the peace. Like I was like the peacemaker 48 00:02:13,440 --> 00:02:17,360 Speaker 5: of all the girls. So they were all like fighting 49 00:02:17,440 --> 00:02:20,120 Speaker 5: and drama and I'm like happy and let's all be 50 00:02:20,160 --> 00:02:22,079 Speaker 5: friends and let's talk through it. So that was kind 51 00:02:22,080 --> 00:02:23,359 Speaker 5: of who I was on the show. 52 00:02:23,400 --> 00:02:26,079 Speaker 2: Actually, Sam said that about to you, So that's your 53 00:02:26,280 --> 00:02:27,840 Speaker 2: that is your reputation. 54 00:02:27,400 --> 00:02:28,040 Speaker 4: On the show. 55 00:02:28,600 --> 00:02:32,240 Speaker 2: Did you ever feel like drained by having to be that? 56 00:02:32,600 --> 00:02:32,720 Speaker 6: Oh? 57 00:02:32,800 --> 00:02:35,239 Speaker 5: Yeah, I mean, I feel like I do that now 58 00:02:35,280 --> 00:02:37,320 Speaker 5: with my husband and his ex wife. So I'm just 59 00:02:37,360 --> 00:02:40,760 Speaker 5: like kind of that person. But the show, the show 60 00:02:40,800 --> 00:02:42,920 Speaker 5: was draining in general. It was like so much drama, 61 00:02:43,840 --> 00:02:46,919 Speaker 5: just fighting about dumb things, Like it wasn't just about 62 00:02:46,919 --> 00:02:49,560 Speaker 5: real estate. It was like drama and I'd come home 63 00:02:49,600 --> 00:02:51,320 Speaker 5: and I'd like cry to my husband and be like 64 00:02:51,800 --> 00:02:54,560 Speaker 5: this happened today, and it was just it was a lot. 65 00:02:54,760 --> 00:02:55,280 Speaker 4: It was a lot. 66 00:02:55,760 --> 00:02:58,240 Speaker 3: So yes, it seems like a lot I wanted. 67 00:02:58,400 --> 00:03:00,840 Speaker 2: I wasn't going to jump straight into working with your 68 00:03:00,880 --> 00:03:05,120 Speaker 2: husband's ex wife. But since we're talking about it. 69 00:03:05,200 --> 00:03:08,000 Speaker 6: When that opportunity person, I feel like we did back 70 00:03:08,080 --> 00:03:11,200 Speaker 6: up a little bit because I like, I don't want 71 00:03:11,240 --> 00:03:12,600 Speaker 6: to jump right into it because I feel like I 72 00:03:12,639 --> 00:03:15,360 Speaker 6: want you to like set up like how and if. 73 00:03:15,240 --> 00:03:16,760 Speaker 1: You don't mind, I don't know if you if you're 74 00:03:16,760 --> 00:03:18,480 Speaker 1: weird to talk about your age, but like how old 75 00:03:18,520 --> 00:03:20,919 Speaker 1: were you when you met your husband? How long were 76 00:03:20,919 --> 00:03:24,320 Speaker 1: you dating before you got married? And then and then let's. 77 00:03:24,120 --> 00:03:26,880 Speaker 5: Say, how did Jill meet And yeah, yes, we met 78 00:03:26,919 --> 00:03:29,119 Speaker 5: like random, so it was kind of like an old 79 00:03:29,120 --> 00:03:31,639 Speaker 5: school like me. It was like random when no one 80 00:03:31,680 --> 00:03:34,280 Speaker 5: introduced us. It was on fourth of July twenty nineteen, 81 00:03:34,840 --> 00:03:36,440 Speaker 5: I went down to Newport Beach, so I was living 82 00:03:36,440 --> 00:03:39,720 Speaker 5: in LA filming up here, working up here, and then 83 00:03:39,760 --> 00:03:43,080 Speaker 5: went down to Orange County for Fourth of July. And 84 00:03:43,880 --> 00:03:46,400 Speaker 5: he has a boat, and so his boat was like 85 00:03:46,480 --> 00:03:48,680 Speaker 5: docked at this famous bar called Woodies. And then the 86 00:03:48,680 --> 00:03:50,960 Speaker 5: boat I was on was docked at Woodies. And then 87 00:03:51,000 --> 00:03:53,040 Speaker 5: my girlfriend, who also lives in LA, she was on 88 00:03:53,080 --> 00:03:55,640 Speaker 5: his boat, which was random, and I saw her and 89 00:03:55,680 --> 00:03:58,040 Speaker 5: I went went down there, said hi to her, and 90 00:03:58,080 --> 00:04:02,080 Speaker 5: then he like B lines to me, A lines, B lines, 91 00:04:03,360 --> 00:04:06,080 Speaker 5: he bee lines to me, and he introduced himself and 92 00:04:06,080 --> 00:04:07,560 Speaker 5: I knew who he was because he, you know, he 93 00:04:07,600 --> 00:04:09,640 Speaker 5: had a show. His divorce was all over the place, 94 00:04:10,200 --> 00:04:12,080 Speaker 5: and I just knew. I knew who he was from 95 00:04:12,760 --> 00:04:16,120 Speaker 5: from all that, and he was like hi. I'm like hi, 96 00:04:16,720 --> 00:04:19,240 Speaker 5: and I wasn't interested. I was like in a zone. 97 00:04:19,400 --> 00:04:20,880 Speaker 5: I had just got off of like a three and 98 00:04:20,920 --> 00:04:24,400 Speaker 5: a half year relationship and I'd been dating and men 99 00:04:24,680 --> 00:04:27,720 Speaker 5: just were pulls. It was like apple after apple over 100 00:04:27,760 --> 00:04:29,880 Speaker 5: and over, and my heart was getting broken and I 101 00:04:29,960 --> 00:04:31,560 Speaker 5: was just kind of over it. I'm like I'm done. 102 00:04:31,560 --> 00:04:33,599 Speaker 5: I want to be happy. At this time, I was 103 00:04:33,680 --> 00:04:37,360 Speaker 5: thirty one, so you know, I had had some serious 104 00:04:37,400 --> 00:04:40,320 Speaker 5: relationships and then just kind of some like dating adventures, 105 00:04:40,360 --> 00:04:44,120 Speaker 5: and at that point in my life, I was ready 106 00:04:44,120 --> 00:04:46,679 Speaker 5: to get married. I wasn't looking to just date for fun. 107 00:04:47,360 --> 00:04:50,440 Speaker 5: And I'm a huge lover, like I always believe in 108 00:04:50,480 --> 00:04:54,200 Speaker 5: true love, like soulmates, and I knew he was out there. 109 00:04:54,240 --> 00:04:56,039 Speaker 5: It was just like finding the right person, which is 110 00:04:56,080 --> 00:04:59,000 Speaker 5: really hard, and I had kind of just not given up. 111 00:04:59,000 --> 00:05:00,440 Speaker 5: I'm like, I'm gona take a little bre I just 112 00:05:00,480 --> 00:05:02,640 Speaker 5: need I need to be happy on my own and 113 00:05:02,720 --> 00:05:06,400 Speaker 5: not worry about meeting my husband. So he introduced himself. 114 00:05:06,400 --> 00:05:08,320 Speaker 5: I'm like, I know you are. He thought I knew 115 00:05:08,360 --> 00:05:11,320 Speaker 5: him from who he was, and I'm like, you asked 116 00:05:11,320 --> 00:05:14,080 Speaker 5: me out on Instagram three years ago. He's let into 117 00:05:14,120 --> 00:05:16,919 Speaker 5: my DMS. But at the time, I had a boyfriend, 118 00:05:16,960 --> 00:05:18,560 Speaker 5: and I said, you know, I have a boyfriend. I'm flattered, 119 00:05:18,600 --> 00:05:21,480 Speaker 5: but I have a boyfriend. And then he's like, well, 120 00:05:21,480 --> 00:05:22,560 Speaker 5: do you want to go to Paris with me? And now, 121 00:05:22,600 --> 00:05:23,800 Speaker 5: well do you have a boyfriend? Still? 122 00:05:23,880 --> 00:05:23,960 Speaker 7: No? 123 00:05:24,160 --> 00:05:25,360 Speaker 5: Do you want to go to Paris next week? And 124 00:05:25,400 --> 00:05:27,200 Speaker 5: I'm like no, do you want to go to Vegas? 125 00:05:27,480 --> 00:05:27,520 Speaker 2: No? 126 00:05:28,080 --> 00:05:29,200 Speaker 5: Will you go on a date with me. I'm like 127 00:05:29,200 --> 00:05:34,679 Speaker 5: I don't know, maybe, and we ended up exchanging phone numbers. 128 00:05:34,680 --> 00:05:36,160 Speaker 5: It's a long story. Do you want me to like 129 00:05:36,240 --> 00:05:38,960 Speaker 5: tell you not all? Kind of like I shrink it 130 00:05:39,000 --> 00:05:41,160 Speaker 5: down a little, but yeah. 131 00:05:40,720 --> 00:05:42,680 Speaker 4: I need to Did you go to Vegas? And did 132 00:05:42,720 --> 00:05:43,479 Speaker 4: you go to Paris? 133 00:05:43,680 --> 00:05:43,760 Speaker 2: No? 134 00:05:43,920 --> 00:05:45,280 Speaker 5: And I was like I'm not going to spend the 135 00:05:45,360 --> 00:05:47,000 Speaker 5: night with you, like I know that works. I'm not 136 00:05:47,040 --> 00:05:49,479 Speaker 5: doing that. And he's like we'll get separate rooms. Like 137 00:05:49,520 --> 00:05:53,760 Speaker 5: I'm like sure, okay, And then we ended up exchanging 138 00:05:53,839 --> 00:05:58,119 Speaker 5: numbers and texting back and forth for a couple of weeks. 139 00:05:58,400 --> 00:05:59,760 Speaker 5: A lot more happened. I mean, it's actually a really 140 00:05:59,800 --> 00:06:01,719 Speaker 5: good story. But I left the boat because some like 141 00:06:01,720 --> 00:06:05,000 Speaker 5: twenty year old girl started insulting me. Him and I 142 00:06:05,040 --> 00:06:07,599 Speaker 5: were like in a deep conversation about his divorce, and 143 00:06:07,680 --> 00:06:11,080 Speaker 5: she comes over and she's like, no more talk about divorce. 144 00:06:11,200 --> 00:06:13,560 Speaker 5: We're not talking about serious things today. And I was 145 00:06:13,600 --> 00:06:16,159 Speaker 5: like I'm too old for this. I just I don't 146 00:06:16,200 --> 00:06:18,480 Speaker 5: need this in my life. So I left the boat. 147 00:06:18,760 --> 00:06:21,279 Speaker 5: And everyone who I'm friends with on the boat that 148 00:06:21,360 --> 00:06:23,280 Speaker 5: day they said that he like went down to like 149 00:06:23,279 --> 00:06:25,800 Speaker 5: one of the rooms, was like sulking downstairs. Was so 150 00:06:25,880 --> 00:06:28,560 Speaker 5: sad that I left, and then he came back upstairs 151 00:06:28,600 --> 00:06:30,680 Speaker 5: and he ended up honking his boat horn at me. 152 00:06:30,800 --> 00:06:33,000 Speaker 5: I was on the other boat talking to another guy, 153 00:06:33,440 --> 00:06:36,800 Speaker 5: like laid on the horn made me like jump and 154 00:06:36,800 --> 00:06:39,040 Speaker 5: then he's like get over here, like you're my girl, 155 00:06:39,720 --> 00:06:43,000 Speaker 5: and I was like that's cute. So then we exchanged numbers. 156 00:06:43,520 --> 00:06:46,719 Speaker 5: I ended up leaving and he just was like texting 157 00:06:46,760 --> 00:06:50,000 Speaker 5: me and I ended up canceling our first date the 158 00:06:50,080 --> 00:06:52,479 Speaker 5: day of because I was like, you know, I'm I 159 00:06:52,560 --> 00:06:54,599 Speaker 5: just don't want to put myself out there. I just 160 00:06:54,600 --> 00:06:56,400 Speaker 5: don't want to get hurt again. And I felt like, 161 00:06:56,800 --> 00:06:58,479 Speaker 5: you know, I feel like that's where it's going to go. 162 00:06:58,960 --> 00:07:02,919 Speaker 5: And he's like, I promise you I'm different. Hmm. So 163 00:07:02,960 --> 00:07:04,720 Speaker 5: one of my best friends like, just give him a chance. 164 00:07:04,760 --> 00:07:07,880 Speaker 5: Why not just do it? I don't know. I'm like, okay, 165 00:07:08,000 --> 00:07:09,960 Speaker 5: So I'm like, you can take me out like Monday, 166 00:07:10,080 --> 00:07:13,280 Speaker 5: eight o'clock and only for drinks, and that's what happened, 167 00:07:13,320 --> 00:07:14,400 Speaker 5: and then that was kind of it. 168 00:07:15,040 --> 00:07:15,320 Speaker 6: Okay. 169 00:07:15,320 --> 00:07:18,400 Speaker 2: Wait, so then y'all are together for a long time, 170 00:07:18,440 --> 00:07:23,680 Speaker 2: and how is the dynamic with you and his ex or. 171 00:07:23,840 --> 00:07:26,400 Speaker 4: How soon were you integrated into that. 172 00:07:26,960 --> 00:07:31,520 Speaker 5: So when after we decided to be like exclusive or 173 00:07:31,560 --> 00:07:34,280 Speaker 5: like boyfriend girlfriend, w was very quick. We moved in 174 00:07:34,360 --> 00:07:37,320 Speaker 5: together really really fast. So I met the kids and 175 00:07:37,360 --> 00:07:39,080 Speaker 5: his whole family probably like a week and a half 176 00:07:39,120 --> 00:07:42,840 Speaker 5: after we started dating. No, yes, and that is great. 177 00:07:43,240 --> 00:07:46,200 Speaker 5: So my I just got very last weekend congratulations, thank you. 178 00:07:46,280 --> 00:07:48,680 Speaker 1: My husband's divorced with two kids and I didn't meet 179 00:07:48,720 --> 00:07:52,320 Speaker 1: them for about a year. So it's just crazy because 180 00:07:52,320 --> 00:07:54,800 Speaker 1: I feel like everybody always asks me, oh, I haven't 181 00:07:54,840 --> 00:07:56,840 Speaker 1: met the kids. It's been this long, And I'm like, 182 00:07:56,920 --> 00:08:00,000 Speaker 1: everybody has a different path, everybody has a difference. 183 00:08:00,240 --> 00:08:02,080 Speaker 3: I don't think there's a right and a wrong in 184 00:08:02,160 --> 00:08:02,920 Speaker 3: any scenario. 185 00:08:03,120 --> 00:08:05,520 Speaker 1: I'm like, it just depends on you your partner, and like 186 00:08:05,800 --> 00:08:06,960 Speaker 1: what they feel is right. 187 00:08:07,120 --> 00:08:07,600 Speaker 2: Yeah. 188 00:08:07,640 --> 00:08:10,160 Speaker 5: So I was the first girl that had ever met 189 00:08:10,440 --> 00:08:14,280 Speaker 5: the kids since the divorce, and you know, he was 190 00:08:14,320 --> 00:08:17,120 Speaker 5: really particular about that and he had never dated, he 191 00:08:17,160 --> 00:08:19,680 Speaker 5: never dated anyone serious until he met me. And he 192 00:08:19,760 --> 00:08:22,480 Speaker 5: had told everybody, I'm never getting married again, I'm never 193 00:08:22,480 --> 00:08:24,160 Speaker 5: gonna have a girlfriend again because he went through such 194 00:08:24,200 --> 00:08:27,920 Speaker 5: a rough divorce it was really brutal. So when he 195 00:08:27,960 --> 00:08:31,600 Speaker 5: met me, everyone was like, wow, like this is not you, 196 00:08:31,760 --> 00:08:34,520 Speaker 5: Like how it was like overnight a completely different person, 197 00:08:34,520 --> 00:08:37,360 Speaker 5: like went from being like out partying and single forever 198 00:08:37,480 --> 00:08:40,080 Speaker 5: and then it was like you're gonna be my wife, 199 00:08:40,080 --> 00:08:42,560 Speaker 5: like I love you, and we just so we moved 200 00:08:42,600 --> 00:08:44,400 Speaker 5: really fast. I think both of us were just ready 201 00:08:44,440 --> 00:08:47,360 Speaker 5: for that connection. And the kids were really ready to 202 00:08:47,400 --> 00:08:49,200 Speaker 5: have a woman in their life again. You know, they 203 00:08:49,200 --> 00:08:51,200 Speaker 5: had their mom, but a woman on their dad's side. 204 00:08:51,600 --> 00:08:54,880 Speaker 5: And so his daughter, she was eight when I met them, 205 00:08:55,400 --> 00:08:57,680 Speaker 5: and his son was three, and she was like so 206 00:08:58,559 --> 00:09:01,040 Speaker 5: receiving to me, like she wanted me so bad, and 207 00:09:02,240 --> 00:09:04,240 Speaker 5: from the moment I met her, it was like read 208 00:09:04,280 --> 00:09:08,120 Speaker 5: her books every night to put her to sleep, like really, 209 00:09:08,360 --> 00:09:12,360 Speaker 5: we integrated our lives together, and then he proposed on 210 00:09:12,400 --> 00:09:14,760 Speaker 5: our one year, our one year anniversary, so it was 211 00:09:14,800 --> 00:09:15,720 Speaker 5: like very fast. 212 00:09:16,760 --> 00:09:21,160 Speaker 2: Did you feel like going did you ever see yourself 213 00:09:22,040 --> 00:09:23,640 Speaker 2: meeting someone who had kids? 214 00:09:23,760 --> 00:09:28,000 Speaker 5: And oh wow, no? Now I think I had always 215 00:09:28,040 --> 00:09:30,800 Speaker 5: said I would never date a man with kids, because 216 00:09:30,800 --> 00:09:33,200 Speaker 5: it's a whole nother layer of yeah, you know, And 217 00:09:33,240 --> 00:09:35,120 Speaker 5: I came from being you know, single in LA with 218 00:09:35,120 --> 00:09:37,640 Speaker 5: my girlfriends, and then it was like, wow, I am 219 00:09:38,600 --> 00:09:43,000 Speaker 5: now raising children and I have like a serious boyfriend, 220 00:09:43,000 --> 00:09:44,400 Speaker 5: and I have these kids in my life. I have 221 00:09:44,440 --> 00:09:46,480 Speaker 5: to learn how to be not a mom. Was in 222 00:09:46,480 --> 00:09:48,600 Speaker 5: the beginning, you're not you know, you're not a mom. 223 00:09:48,640 --> 00:09:51,400 Speaker 5: You're still like figuring out your place. But it was 224 00:09:51,440 --> 00:09:53,959 Speaker 5: a huge change for me. And you never know how 225 00:09:53,960 --> 00:09:55,680 Speaker 5: the ex is going to be with you too, And 226 00:09:55,720 --> 00:09:58,080 Speaker 5: I didn't want to add that drama in my life. 227 00:09:58,120 --> 00:10:01,079 Speaker 5: And I'm a really sensitive person, and I didn't think 228 00:10:01,160 --> 00:10:05,920 Speaker 5: I'm a virgo. Okay, I could handle like if she 229 00:10:06,000 --> 00:10:08,319 Speaker 5: was like a nasty yatch to me, I don't think 230 00:10:08,360 --> 00:10:10,840 Speaker 5: I could. I couldn't handle that being the person that 231 00:10:10,880 --> 00:10:12,199 Speaker 5: I am, with the heart that I have. 232 00:10:12,520 --> 00:10:17,080 Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, I mean I commend anyone who steps into 233 00:10:17,160 --> 00:10:21,880 Speaker 2: the role of a step parent when it's challenging from 234 00:10:22,360 --> 00:10:25,120 Speaker 2: the other parent. I mean, that's like you're taking on 235 00:10:25,400 --> 00:10:27,800 Speaker 2: not only the role of being a parent to these 236 00:10:27,880 --> 00:10:30,120 Speaker 2: kids that you're just meeting for the first time, but 237 00:10:30,240 --> 00:10:35,040 Speaker 2: also navigating the other parent who's involved. 238 00:10:35,200 --> 00:10:35,760 Speaker 5: Not easy. 239 00:10:36,000 --> 00:10:37,080 Speaker 3: So when did you meet her? 240 00:10:37,880 --> 00:10:41,120 Speaker 5: So pretty quickly into it I met her It was 241 00:10:41,920 --> 00:10:47,280 Speaker 5: Tark's Sun's birthday, so we met in July nineteenth. I 242 00:10:47,280 --> 00:10:50,840 Speaker 5: guess you could say official the end of July and 243 00:10:50,880 --> 00:10:55,000 Speaker 5: then I met her August twentieth. 244 00:10:55,280 --> 00:10:57,320 Speaker 4: Wow, how it was the meeting. 245 00:10:58,200 --> 00:11:01,280 Speaker 5: She was very pregnant at the time with her third child, 246 00:11:01,800 --> 00:11:05,760 Speaker 5: and Dark and I were heading up to La to 247 00:11:05,880 --> 00:11:07,720 Speaker 5: like go to like Boa for dinner. So I'm in 248 00:11:07,760 --> 00:11:10,880 Speaker 5: this like fun little pink dress and I'm like, you know, 249 00:11:11,960 --> 00:11:14,679 Speaker 5: and I'd looking all cute and she looked beautiful. I mean, 250 00:11:14,720 --> 00:11:17,240 Speaker 5: she's a beautiful woman, so she looked pretty. But I'm 251 00:11:17,280 --> 00:11:19,920 Speaker 5: sure like him bringing in is new, Yeah, you know, 252 00:11:20,360 --> 00:11:23,439 Speaker 5: girl was like oh, and we went in, said happy 253 00:11:23,440 --> 00:11:25,120 Speaker 5: with his son, like hung out for a little bit, 254 00:11:25,200 --> 00:11:28,439 Speaker 5: and her and I just barely chit chatted. And I 255 00:11:28,520 --> 00:11:30,960 Speaker 5: was nervous because I'm like, I've never met her before. 256 00:11:31,200 --> 00:11:34,560 Speaker 5: She's the mother of your kids, and that's an important 257 00:11:34,600 --> 00:11:37,640 Speaker 5: position for me, Like I'm stepping into being in their lives, 258 00:11:37,720 --> 00:11:39,880 Speaker 5: and are we going to get along? How is it 259 00:11:39,920 --> 00:11:41,640 Speaker 5: going to be? And she probably didn't know at the 260 00:11:41,640 --> 00:11:43,760 Speaker 5: time we were going to be as serious as we were, right, 261 00:11:45,080 --> 00:11:47,000 Speaker 5: But yeah, it was. It was short the first meeting, 262 00:11:47,000 --> 00:11:49,240 Speaker 5: But then I did text her and I said, you know, 263 00:11:49,280 --> 00:11:51,319 Speaker 5: I'm going to be around the kids a lot. Is 264 00:11:51,360 --> 00:11:53,120 Speaker 5: there anything I need to know? I just want to 265 00:11:53,160 --> 00:11:55,880 Speaker 5: like introduce myself and just chit chat a little bit. 266 00:11:55,960 --> 00:11:59,240 Speaker 5: So I ride away texted her and said. 267 00:11:59,000 --> 00:12:03,240 Speaker 2: That, so, was it just kind of like cordial, nice 268 00:12:03,240 --> 00:12:04,240 Speaker 2: to meet to you vibes? 269 00:12:04,400 --> 00:12:08,040 Speaker 4: Yeah, but not knowing if y'all were going to be 270 00:12:08,040 --> 00:12:09,199 Speaker 4: friends or not at that point. 271 00:12:09,360 --> 00:12:15,880 Speaker 2: No, So then there's this infamous moment where y'all are 272 00:12:15,920 --> 00:12:17,839 Speaker 2: all at a was it a game? 273 00:12:18,040 --> 00:12:18,600 Speaker 5: Soccer game? 274 00:12:18,679 --> 00:12:19,240 Speaker 4: Soccer game? 275 00:12:20,480 --> 00:12:21,319 Speaker 2: Soccer? Question? 276 00:12:21,760 --> 00:12:21,960 Speaker 5: Is? 277 00:12:22,960 --> 00:12:26,640 Speaker 2: My question is how you went from that moment to 278 00:12:26,800 --> 00:12:27,560 Speaker 2: where you are now? 279 00:12:27,720 --> 00:12:29,240 Speaker 4: But first we're going to take a break. 280 00:12:30,480 --> 00:12:32,720 Speaker 3: Wow, that's how it's done, Ladies and gentlemen. 281 00:12:32,840 --> 00:12:46,040 Speaker 5: A good one. 282 00:12:48,640 --> 00:12:52,440 Speaker 4: All right, we are back. So the soccer game. Yes, 283 00:12:53,240 --> 00:12:53,960 Speaker 4: what happened. 284 00:12:54,760 --> 00:12:59,720 Speaker 5: It's so funny because I never had like bad press 285 00:12:59,760 --> 00:13:02,440 Speaker 5: until I met my husband. I feel like I was 286 00:13:02,440 --> 00:13:04,400 Speaker 5: always like the nice girl, right, so I have good 287 00:13:04,440 --> 00:13:06,960 Speaker 5: press and then I meet him and it's like chaos. 288 00:13:07,000 --> 00:13:10,960 Speaker 5: Every day of my life. It still is. And you 289 00:13:10,960 --> 00:13:13,720 Speaker 5: know that I'm wrapped into Tark and Christina's drama and that. 290 00:13:13,960 --> 00:13:16,040 Speaker 5: And they were still filming Flip or Flop too, by 291 00:13:16,040 --> 00:13:18,360 Speaker 5: the way, Like, so when we started dating, they had 292 00:13:18,360 --> 00:13:21,080 Speaker 5: their shows still, so he was still filming with her, 293 00:13:21,679 --> 00:13:24,920 Speaker 5: and I had to navigate like. They did not speak 294 00:13:25,000 --> 00:13:27,360 Speaker 5: besides for the kids. It was like they didn't have 295 00:13:27,440 --> 00:13:30,520 Speaker 5: a they didn't have like a relationship. They did not speak. 296 00:13:31,000 --> 00:13:33,600 Speaker 5: So I'm like, okay, we hate her this week, we 297 00:13:33,679 --> 00:13:35,520 Speaker 5: like her, we hate her like well, like I didn't know. 298 00:13:35,559 --> 00:13:41,439 Speaker 5: I'm just I'm supporting my husband the soccer field. I'll 299 00:13:41,480 --> 00:13:43,840 Speaker 5: tell you, Like, I can't go into like super details, 300 00:13:43,880 --> 00:13:46,520 Speaker 5: but it's funny because it wasn't even me and her fighting, 301 00:13:47,200 --> 00:13:49,439 Speaker 5: like the pop Rozzi got this photo and it looked 302 00:13:49,440 --> 00:13:52,120 Speaker 5: like I was like leaning in, like yelling at her. 303 00:13:52,240 --> 00:13:54,280 Speaker 5: It wasn't even I was actually leaning in just kind 304 00:13:54,320 --> 00:13:57,880 Speaker 5: of like talking with her. But my husband and her 305 00:13:57,960 --> 00:14:00,640 Speaker 5: husband at the time, they more go into it like 306 00:14:00,679 --> 00:14:03,680 Speaker 5: they were like, you know, face to face, like getting 307 00:14:03,720 --> 00:14:07,319 Speaker 5: into it. And I don't even know why the pap 308 00:14:07,440 --> 00:14:09,280 Speaker 5: Rozzi were there. I don't I don't even know. But 309 00:14:10,280 --> 00:14:13,000 Speaker 5: we got mad about something that she did, I don't know, 310 00:14:13,120 --> 00:14:15,880 Speaker 5: and Tark just got upset about it and walked over 311 00:14:15,920 --> 00:14:18,000 Speaker 5: to her and said something. I went over to grab him, 312 00:14:18,440 --> 00:14:20,400 Speaker 5: and then I leaned in to say something to her 313 00:14:20,880 --> 00:14:23,160 Speaker 5: and then he pulled me away. So it looked like 314 00:14:23,520 --> 00:14:25,680 Speaker 5: I was fighting with her, but really it was him. 315 00:14:25,720 --> 00:14:27,960 Speaker 2: That was more of yeah, you were trying to like 316 00:14:28,000 --> 00:14:29,000 Speaker 2: break down, use. 317 00:14:29,600 --> 00:14:31,360 Speaker 4: Use this situation in the next. 318 00:14:34,000 --> 00:14:36,880 Speaker 5: But then my stepson he got really sick that night. 319 00:14:37,320 --> 00:14:39,240 Speaker 5: So we woke up to like calls at four in 320 00:14:39,280 --> 00:14:41,960 Speaker 5: the morning that his appendix had to come out, and 321 00:14:42,000 --> 00:14:45,280 Speaker 5: then something else in his stomach, and so we woke 322 00:14:45,360 --> 00:14:47,680 Speaker 5: up to calls that they were at the hospital, and 323 00:14:47,720 --> 00:14:49,960 Speaker 5: so we got our you know, got ready really quick 324 00:14:50,000 --> 00:14:51,920 Speaker 5: and then met at the hospital. And we had just 325 00:14:51,960 --> 00:14:54,720 Speaker 5: come off of that fight that day. And then that 326 00:14:54,840 --> 00:14:57,080 Speaker 5: was actually the weekend I got pregnant, so it was 327 00:14:57,160 --> 00:15:02,000 Speaker 5: like a lot happened that weekend and yeah, so we 328 00:15:02,080 --> 00:15:04,080 Speaker 5: ended up being at the hospital together and that kind 329 00:15:04,120 --> 00:15:06,480 Speaker 5: of that that from that moment on, we were cool. 330 00:15:06,960 --> 00:15:08,560 Speaker 4: Oh how crazy is that. 331 00:15:08,560 --> 00:15:10,360 Speaker 5: That was like the moment that we were like no 332 00:15:10,440 --> 00:15:13,200 Speaker 5: more bs, Like we're not trying to come after you, 333 00:15:13,200 --> 00:15:15,280 Speaker 5: You're not trying to come after us, Like we need 334 00:15:15,320 --> 00:15:17,000 Speaker 5: to be cool for the kids, like, and that was 335 00:15:17,040 --> 00:15:19,080 Speaker 5: the moment that we've and we've been cool since. 336 00:15:19,880 --> 00:15:23,000 Speaker 4: That's so interesting. That's literally the same day of the 337 00:15:23,040 --> 00:15:24,040 Speaker 4: fight is when. 338 00:15:23,920 --> 00:15:24,960 Speaker 5: You cut Yes. 339 00:15:25,120 --> 00:15:25,520 Speaker 4: Yeah. 340 00:15:25,600 --> 00:15:25,920 Speaker 2: Yeah. 341 00:15:26,320 --> 00:15:27,280 Speaker 3: It wasn't like a conversation. 342 00:15:27,320 --> 00:15:30,440 Speaker 5: It was just like a known thing in the hospital. 343 00:15:30,480 --> 00:15:34,320 Speaker 5: We kind of had that conversation. Tark actually like pulled 344 00:15:34,320 --> 00:15:38,400 Speaker 5: her aside and said, you know, we're not like, we 345 00:15:38,440 --> 00:15:40,760 Speaker 5: don't want any issues with you, and she's like, I 346 00:15:40,800 --> 00:15:42,920 Speaker 5: don't either, and then from then on it was just, 347 00:15:43,160 --> 00:15:46,120 Speaker 5: you know, that stressful, scary moment with Brydon, my stepson, 348 00:15:46,360 --> 00:15:50,040 Speaker 5: brought us all closer together and then that was it. 349 00:15:50,080 --> 00:15:52,120 Speaker 5: The drama, all the drama and the BS was kind 350 00:15:52,120 --> 00:15:52,440 Speaker 5: of over. 351 00:15:53,280 --> 00:15:55,280 Speaker 4: Wow, So how did you navigate what? 352 00:15:55,440 --> 00:15:58,520 Speaker 2: So you're dating him and he's still working going to 353 00:15:58,560 --> 00:16:00,560 Speaker 2: work with his ex wife and obviously you know it's 354 00:16:00,560 --> 00:16:02,760 Speaker 2: like tense and they're not they're barely even speaking. 355 00:16:03,520 --> 00:16:04,640 Speaker 4: How did you handle that though? 356 00:16:04,640 --> 00:16:08,200 Speaker 2: Because there's still I mean, I think everyone it's human 357 00:16:08,280 --> 00:16:10,840 Speaker 2: to have kind of like insecurities are like these people 358 00:16:10,880 --> 00:16:14,320 Speaker 2: were married, what if you know, how did you navigate that? 359 00:16:14,440 --> 00:16:16,640 Speaker 5: It's interesting because you know a lot of people don't 360 00:16:16,680 --> 00:16:20,280 Speaker 5: ask me that, but I think like as women, you know, 361 00:16:21,680 --> 00:16:23,880 Speaker 5: we all go through things in our minds where you're like, 362 00:16:24,920 --> 00:16:26,920 Speaker 5: you know, is he doing that? Does he? And I 363 00:16:26,960 --> 00:16:29,360 Speaker 5: think for me in the beginning, you know, I knew 364 00:16:29,360 --> 00:16:32,000 Speaker 5: we loved each other, but it's still new and he's 365 00:16:32,120 --> 00:16:34,800 Speaker 5: with this woman for so many years of his life. 366 00:16:34,800 --> 00:16:37,320 Speaker 5: They have two kids together. I knew how in love 367 00:16:37,440 --> 00:16:41,040 Speaker 5: he was with her, and it was always like a 368 00:16:41,040 --> 00:16:42,600 Speaker 5: little in the back of my mind, like are you 369 00:16:42,640 --> 00:16:45,720 Speaker 5: still in love with this woman? Obviously he still love you, 370 00:16:45,720 --> 00:16:48,120 Speaker 5: you know you love me, But I never said that 371 00:16:48,160 --> 00:16:49,760 Speaker 5: to him. It's like I was a question I ever 372 00:16:49,800 --> 00:16:52,320 Speaker 5: asked him, but it was like, are you fully over her? 373 00:16:52,520 --> 00:16:54,880 Speaker 5: I mean, when you're you're deeply like you're married to someone, 374 00:16:54,920 --> 00:16:58,440 Speaker 5: you're in love with them, are you over it? And 375 00:16:59,720 --> 00:17:02,520 Speaker 5: but honestly, and he never it's like he did anything 376 00:17:02,560 --> 00:17:04,520 Speaker 5: to ever for me to ever think he wasn't. It 377 00:17:04,600 --> 00:17:06,760 Speaker 5: was just like the girl in me, like being a 378 00:17:06,800 --> 00:17:07,880 Speaker 5: little insecure at. 379 00:17:07,800 --> 00:17:09,439 Speaker 4: The time, like a human in you. 380 00:17:09,760 --> 00:17:12,480 Speaker 5: Yeah, the human in me, I guess, yeah. And I 381 00:17:12,520 --> 00:17:15,359 Speaker 5: spoke about it only one other time with the Today Show. 382 00:17:15,680 --> 00:17:17,320 Speaker 5: I kind of brought that up, and then of course 383 00:17:17,359 --> 00:17:20,479 Speaker 5: the headlines take it and they spin all these things. 384 00:17:20,560 --> 00:17:22,359 Speaker 5: And so that's why I think I've always kind of 385 00:17:22,440 --> 00:17:24,080 Speaker 5: kept it to myself because I don't want to look 386 00:17:24,119 --> 00:17:27,000 Speaker 5: like I'm crazy, you know, But I think it's just 387 00:17:27,000 --> 00:17:29,879 Speaker 5: the human in you, right, like you're, yeah, you're a 388 00:17:29,880 --> 00:17:32,200 Speaker 5: little insecure in the beginning, I think in any relationship, 389 00:17:32,320 --> 00:17:34,320 Speaker 5: and it wasn't because of him, It was because of me. 390 00:17:34,640 --> 00:17:34,880 Speaker 4: Yeah. 391 00:17:34,880 --> 00:17:39,000 Speaker 2: And it's also it's such a specific situation that you're in, 392 00:17:39,080 --> 00:17:43,600 Speaker 2: Like how often are people having this very public relationship 393 00:17:43,640 --> 00:17:46,040 Speaker 2: with someone who's just gone through a very public divorce 394 00:17:46,640 --> 00:17:49,320 Speaker 2: and then they work together still, Like this is not 395 00:17:49,440 --> 00:17:51,000 Speaker 2: a normal Like people are so like. 396 00:17:51,040 --> 00:17:54,199 Speaker 1: I just want you to know that, like you, in 397 00:17:54,240 --> 00:17:57,200 Speaker 1: my opinion, like you don't sound crazy, you don't look crazy, 398 00:17:57,280 --> 00:18:00,320 Speaker 1: you don't nothing that you're saying is crazy, because I too, 399 00:18:00,600 --> 00:18:03,440 Speaker 1: like I I don't have to deal with the working 400 00:18:03,480 --> 00:18:06,040 Speaker 1: together part of it. But I feel like when I 401 00:18:06,160 --> 00:18:08,680 Speaker 1: was in the beginning, in the early stages, you're like, oh, 402 00:18:08,720 --> 00:18:14,560 Speaker 1: you've you've been married before, like you've had a wedding before, like. 403 00:18:14,560 --> 00:18:15,520 Speaker 5: I'm the second wife. 404 00:18:15,720 --> 00:18:17,600 Speaker 1: Yeah, and not even that, but like it's like you 405 00:18:17,680 --> 00:18:19,720 Speaker 1: have these feelings of like, this is something I've looked 406 00:18:19,760 --> 00:18:21,400 Speaker 1: forward to my whole life and you've already done it. 407 00:18:21,840 --> 00:18:24,320 Speaker 1: And I had those same thoughts too, and it's like 408 00:18:24,359 --> 00:18:27,600 Speaker 1: you don't really realize until you have some time under 409 00:18:27,640 --> 00:18:30,360 Speaker 1: your belt with that person that like it is it's 410 00:18:31,680 --> 00:18:32,280 Speaker 1: I don't want to. 411 00:18:32,280 --> 00:18:34,040 Speaker 3: I don't want to like minimize marriage. But it's just 412 00:18:34,080 --> 00:18:35,840 Speaker 3: another relationship, do you know what I mean. 413 00:18:35,880 --> 00:18:37,439 Speaker 5: And it's a very different relationship. 414 00:18:37,800 --> 00:18:38,000 Speaker 2: Yeah. 415 00:18:38,200 --> 00:18:40,520 Speaker 5: Before Yes, it took time. Like you said, it was 416 00:18:40,600 --> 00:18:43,080 Speaker 5: like now it's something I would never even and even 417 00:18:43,160 --> 00:18:45,080 Speaker 5: years ago, it's like I don't even think about that. 418 00:18:45,119 --> 00:18:48,200 Speaker 5: But in the beginning, yeah, there was those moments where 419 00:18:48,760 --> 00:18:51,200 Speaker 5: even though they did, they weren't speaking, they didn't get along. 420 00:18:52,400 --> 00:18:54,840 Speaker 5: But it's not like I'm just you know, in the beginning, 421 00:18:54,840 --> 00:18:57,240 Speaker 5: you're still managing your relationship. Yeah, you know each other, 422 00:18:57,640 --> 00:18:59,720 Speaker 5: and you add kids into it, and then you add 423 00:18:59,720 --> 00:19:02,800 Speaker 5: an wife who was very much in our lives, and 424 00:19:02,840 --> 00:19:05,480 Speaker 5: it's not like right away we were like very close, 425 00:19:05,880 --> 00:19:08,080 Speaker 5: you know. It was still like I was navigating my position. 426 00:19:08,200 --> 00:19:11,280 Speaker 5: I was navigating my relationship, navigating all of a sudden 427 00:19:11,400 --> 00:19:13,639 Speaker 5: taking care of children. So I was like I was 428 00:19:13,680 --> 00:19:16,159 Speaker 5: managing a lot. Plus I was still filming selling sunset 429 00:19:16,560 --> 00:19:18,960 Speaker 5: up in La a lot. Like I was managing a 430 00:19:19,000 --> 00:19:21,920 Speaker 5: lot of that time in my life and coming into 431 00:19:21,920 --> 00:19:25,720 Speaker 5: like a very chaotic situation with the public eye watching us. 432 00:19:25,840 --> 00:19:30,000 Speaker 1: Literally, I like it's like hearing my own self talking 433 00:19:30,040 --> 00:19:32,520 Speaker 1: because it's like I dealt with that on the literally 434 00:19:32,560 --> 00:19:35,480 Speaker 1: on a smaller scale because it wasn't like the public 435 00:19:35,600 --> 00:19:38,000 Speaker 1: was like, yeah, scrutinizing me in any way, shape or form. 436 00:19:38,119 --> 00:19:39,960 Speaker 1: So like I do commend you because I feel like 437 00:19:40,000 --> 00:19:41,359 Speaker 1: I didn't have that extra. 438 00:19:41,160 --> 00:19:41,600 Speaker 5: Layer of. 439 00:19:43,680 --> 00:19:46,159 Speaker 3: Scrutiny to deal with. And it is so crazy. 440 00:19:46,200 --> 00:19:48,840 Speaker 1: You're like a single girl just having to like I 441 00:19:48,840 --> 00:19:51,720 Speaker 1: would like spend saturdays postmating breakfast, lunch, and dinner on 442 00:19:51,760 --> 00:19:55,399 Speaker 1: my couch, like when I was exhausted to like barely 443 00:19:55,440 --> 00:19:58,159 Speaker 1: having a minute to myself and like figuring out what 444 00:19:58,400 --> 00:20:00,000 Speaker 1: to like make our family for dinner. 445 00:20:00,240 --> 00:20:01,520 Speaker 3: You know what I mean. It's like it's such a 446 00:20:01,680 --> 00:20:03,160 Speaker 3: crazy like school. 447 00:20:02,880 --> 00:20:06,639 Speaker 5: Schedules and yeah, just and then guaranteeing and with with 448 00:20:06,720 --> 00:20:09,760 Speaker 5: the ex wife and it was, yeah, it was a lot. 449 00:20:09,880 --> 00:20:11,840 Speaker 5: So I'm happy I'm in the place I am now 450 00:20:11,880 --> 00:20:14,560 Speaker 5: because now that I like, now i'm six years in 451 00:20:14,640 --> 00:20:16,800 Speaker 5: I think back, I'm like, oh my god, wow, that 452 00:20:16,880 --> 00:20:18,800 Speaker 5: was a lot of girl. It was a girlwind it 453 00:20:18,840 --> 00:20:21,800 Speaker 5: still is. My husband's a little you know, he's fine. 454 00:20:21,920 --> 00:20:23,880 Speaker 5: He's crazy in a good way. 455 00:20:24,200 --> 00:20:26,960 Speaker 2: So we all have a show together now we do 456 00:20:27,320 --> 00:20:31,560 Speaker 2: so and and obviously there's the working relationship, but it 457 00:20:31,720 --> 00:20:34,920 Speaker 2: seems like you and chriesting to have a good relationship. 458 00:20:35,280 --> 00:20:35,960 Speaker 3: Are you friends? 459 00:20:36,880 --> 00:20:39,480 Speaker 5: I would say we are friends. I don't want to 460 00:20:39,480 --> 00:20:41,640 Speaker 5: say we're not, because that's that's rude, because we do. 461 00:20:41,680 --> 00:20:44,119 Speaker 5: We know we But I think too, there has to 462 00:20:44,160 --> 00:20:47,440 Speaker 5: be boundaries when sure, it's still his ex wife, and 463 00:20:47,480 --> 00:20:50,240 Speaker 5: I think it wouldn't be respectful to him if I 464 00:20:50,359 --> 00:20:52,399 Speaker 5: was like, let's go out have girls nights, you know, 465 00:20:52,440 --> 00:20:55,359 Speaker 5: and I'm inviting her around, Like I think that I 466 00:20:55,680 --> 00:20:57,560 Speaker 5: still feel like there should be because like they went through 467 00:20:57,560 --> 00:21:01,120 Speaker 5: their their stuff, you know, and and ultimately my husband 468 00:21:01,200 --> 00:21:04,920 Speaker 5: is he's my number one. But we like each other 469 00:21:05,040 --> 00:21:09,119 Speaker 5: and we get along and we have fun together, which 470 00:21:09,960 --> 00:21:12,080 Speaker 5: he knew we would. He would always tell me like, oh, 471 00:21:12,080 --> 00:21:13,960 Speaker 5: you guys are gonna get along. You guys, you know, 472 00:21:14,000 --> 00:21:16,200 Speaker 5: you guys are definitely gonna get along and have fun together. 473 00:21:16,760 --> 00:21:19,280 Speaker 5: Because I was like, are we gonna enjoy working together? 474 00:21:20,000 --> 00:21:22,240 Speaker 5: We co parent, But it's very different when you're with 475 00:21:22,280 --> 00:21:25,360 Speaker 5: someone a lot more and you're you're filming with them 476 00:21:25,520 --> 00:21:28,639 Speaker 5: and him and her film together for years, and then 477 00:21:29,240 --> 00:21:31,720 Speaker 5: you know, I'm not the odd one out, but they were. 478 00:21:31,960 --> 00:21:34,400 Speaker 5: They knew how each other worked on set and filmed, 479 00:21:34,400 --> 00:21:36,679 Speaker 5: and you know, it's a relationship that you really have to. 480 00:21:38,480 --> 00:21:40,720 Speaker 5: It's hard. It's not easy to be on camera, right, 481 00:21:40,760 --> 00:21:42,320 Speaker 5: and him and I had our thing. I had my 482 00:21:42,359 --> 00:21:44,879 Speaker 5: thing on selling sunset, but like bringing us all together, 483 00:21:45,000 --> 00:21:48,320 Speaker 5: what was the dynamic going to be? The first day 484 00:21:48,359 --> 00:21:50,280 Speaker 5: we filmed together, she texted me after, She's like, that 485 00:21:50,320 --> 00:21:52,439 Speaker 5: was so fun. It was great. I'm like, I know, 486 00:21:52,480 --> 00:21:56,040 Speaker 5: I agree, it was so fun. So working together brought 487 00:21:56,040 --> 00:21:58,280 Speaker 5: our relationship closer where we got to know each other 488 00:21:58,320 --> 00:22:02,280 Speaker 5: on a deeper level and not just like co parents. Yeah, yeah, 489 00:22:02,400 --> 00:22:04,080 Speaker 5: I mean, I just want you to know, like I do, 490 00:22:04,080 --> 00:22:08,439 Speaker 5: you know a lot of step moms. Your situation is 491 00:22:08,480 --> 00:22:11,720 Speaker 5: so like unique and rare, and like, it's so nice 492 00:22:11,760 --> 00:22:13,320 Speaker 5: that you have that. I hope you will come to 493 00:22:13,359 --> 00:22:16,440 Speaker 5: me now that they know my situation, they know that 494 00:22:16,480 --> 00:22:19,639 Speaker 5: we're navigating it so positively. They now I hear a 495 00:22:19,680 --> 00:22:23,639 Speaker 5: lot of stepmoms coming to me. But before not really no, 496 00:22:23,960 --> 00:22:25,280 Speaker 5: but now I do. Yeah. 497 00:22:26,000 --> 00:22:28,639 Speaker 2: Who presented the idea of y'all doing a show together? 498 00:22:29,280 --> 00:22:31,080 Speaker 5: We had kind of Tark and I had been talking 499 00:22:31,119 --> 00:22:36,000 Speaker 5: about doing like a competition show, and then I forgot 500 00:22:36,080 --> 00:22:38,120 Speaker 5: exactly how it went down. But then we started talking 501 00:22:38,160 --> 00:22:40,320 Speaker 5: to Christina about doing it against each other and then 502 00:22:40,359 --> 00:22:42,760 Speaker 5: we propose it to the network and we came up 503 00:22:42,760 --> 00:22:43,440 Speaker 5: with a name too. 504 00:22:44,200 --> 00:22:44,680 Speaker 2: Oh wow. 505 00:22:44,920 --> 00:22:47,800 Speaker 5: Yeah, it was interesting because we're co producers on the show, 506 00:22:47,920 --> 00:22:51,560 Speaker 5: so we really helped like cultivate the whole season and 507 00:22:51,720 --> 00:22:52,960 Speaker 5: bring it all together and. 508 00:22:52,920 --> 00:22:55,399 Speaker 3: It's doing amazing. Yeah, Like, are you so proud? 509 00:22:55,480 --> 00:22:57,719 Speaker 5: I'm so proud. I'm so proud. I'm proud of our 510 00:22:57,720 --> 00:23:01,760 Speaker 5: other show too. We have the Flipping all moosas that show, 511 00:23:01,840 --> 00:23:03,960 Speaker 5: like season two, season one, I was learning how to 512 00:23:03,960 --> 00:23:07,240 Speaker 5: flip shows on our flip shows Flip Houses on TV. 513 00:23:07,520 --> 00:23:10,760 Speaker 5: So you know you watched me like learning and season 514 00:23:10,760 --> 00:23:12,840 Speaker 5: two you see, like how much I've learned and put 515 00:23:12,840 --> 00:23:15,440 Speaker 5: it all together. It's so good. But I feel like 516 00:23:15,480 --> 00:23:17,520 Speaker 5: people stop talking about the flipping on says because the 517 00:23:17,560 --> 00:23:18,240 Speaker 5: flip off. 518 00:23:19,200 --> 00:23:24,440 Speaker 4: You know nothing. People love a competition show. You bring 519 00:23:24,480 --> 00:23:26,600 Speaker 4: in your dynamic there they eat it up. 520 00:23:26,760 --> 00:23:27,440 Speaker 5: Yeah. 521 00:23:27,480 --> 00:23:30,560 Speaker 4: So y'all expanded your family together? We did, so you 522 00:23:30,600 --> 00:23:33,560 Speaker 4: have a son together? What was that? How was that? 523 00:23:33,640 --> 00:23:33,760 Speaker 2: Like? 524 00:23:33,800 --> 00:23:37,400 Speaker 4: What was it like with bringing because Tanya is gonna. 525 00:23:37,160 --> 00:23:41,040 Speaker 2: Yes, eventually go through the process of expanding their family. 526 00:23:41,320 --> 00:23:43,320 Speaker 4: Y'all have a very similar It's. 527 00:23:43,280 --> 00:23:45,760 Speaker 1: Crazy, I'm like, but also I just got married last week. 528 00:23:45,760 --> 00:23:50,120 Speaker 3: I'm like everybody like race, I know, I know. 529 00:23:52,160 --> 00:23:56,080 Speaker 5: So it's interesting because when we first met, we talked 530 00:23:56,080 --> 00:24:00,440 Speaker 5: about not having kids of our own, and I think 531 00:24:00,480 --> 00:24:03,720 Speaker 5: for me, until I met that person, I never I 532 00:24:03,800 --> 00:24:06,199 Speaker 5: wasn't like someone that was like I can't wait to 533 00:24:06,200 --> 00:24:08,600 Speaker 5: have children. I can't wait to I wanted to get married, 534 00:24:08,680 --> 00:24:11,080 Speaker 5: but I had never met anyone that I would want 535 00:24:11,080 --> 00:24:14,280 Speaker 5: to have children with. So then when we first met 536 00:24:14,280 --> 00:24:16,560 Speaker 5: and we instantly had a connection, I still was like, no, 537 00:24:16,760 --> 00:24:18,760 Speaker 5: I don't I don't think I want kids, like I'm okay, 538 00:24:19,240 --> 00:24:21,280 Speaker 5: and he already had his two, so he was like, 539 00:24:21,320 --> 00:24:23,720 Speaker 5: I'm good. He came well, yeah, he came over. I 540 00:24:23,720 --> 00:24:26,320 Speaker 5: remember he came over to my house and we like 541 00:24:26,359 --> 00:24:28,200 Speaker 5: sat down. I could tell his energy was off. I'm like, 542 00:24:28,240 --> 00:24:31,359 Speaker 5: what's going on. He's like, I just I'm really serious 543 00:24:31,359 --> 00:24:33,920 Speaker 5: that I don't want more kids and I don't want that. 544 00:24:34,080 --> 00:24:36,800 Speaker 5: I don't want you. I don't I don't know how 545 00:24:36,840 --> 00:24:38,440 Speaker 5: you're going to handle that. And I'm like, it's okay, 546 00:24:38,440 --> 00:24:42,240 Speaker 5: I don't want kids either. Well back forward, you know, 547 00:24:42,280 --> 00:24:44,520 Speaker 5: we fell in love and you have you have this 548 00:24:44,600 --> 00:24:46,720 Speaker 5: deep connection with someone, and then I loved being a 549 00:24:46,720 --> 00:24:50,840 Speaker 5: stepmom so much, I was so close to the kids. 550 00:24:50,960 --> 00:24:54,440 Speaker 5: I just wanted to experience it on my own and 551 00:24:54,680 --> 00:24:57,880 Speaker 5: have my own and have my own with him. And 552 00:24:59,600 --> 00:25:02,480 Speaker 5: we got married. We already kind of talking about it, 553 00:25:02,520 --> 00:25:04,800 Speaker 5: and his sister at the wedding was like, you have 554 00:25:04,840 --> 00:25:06,679 Speaker 5: to give her a baby, Like, give her a baby, 555 00:25:06,840 --> 00:25:09,399 Speaker 5: just you know, do it. And then after we got married, 556 00:25:09,400 --> 00:25:12,680 Speaker 5: we just stopped not trying. Wait, no, wait, we stopped 557 00:25:12,800 --> 00:25:15,040 Speaker 5: wait what does that mean you start stopped not wait, 558 00:25:15,080 --> 00:25:18,600 Speaker 5: we stopped protecting, like you know. So we were just 559 00:25:18,640 --> 00:25:22,159 Speaker 5: like whatever, whatever happens happened. But we had done IVF 560 00:25:22,359 --> 00:25:26,240 Speaker 5: and we had embryos because I had low fertility, and 561 00:25:26,280 --> 00:25:29,480 Speaker 5: then he had testicular cancer, so like, the chances of 562 00:25:29,560 --> 00:25:32,359 Speaker 5: us having a baby is very low. So I did 563 00:25:32,400 --> 00:25:35,919 Speaker 5: two rounds of IVF. I didn't get very many eggs, 564 00:25:35,920 --> 00:25:39,160 Speaker 5: but then they were able to make them in the lab. 565 00:25:39,640 --> 00:25:41,840 Speaker 5: I guess it's what they do. And then we got 566 00:25:42,920 --> 00:25:45,920 Speaker 5: four embryos, so we were planning on putting an embryo 567 00:25:46,000 --> 00:25:50,480 Speaker 5: in and then I got pregnant, so naturally. Yeah, So 568 00:25:50,480 --> 00:25:52,200 Speaker 5: it was just a lot of trying and a lot 569 00:25:52,240 --> 00:25:54,639 Speaker 5: of fun. Like we didn't I wasn't like stressing about it. 570 00:25:54,680 --> 00:25:56,399 Speaker 5: I was just like, whatever happens, because I know I 571 00:25:56,400 --> 00:25:59,440 Speaker 5: have my embryos, and then I got pregnant. It was 572 00:25:59,440 --> 00:26:01,000 Speaker 5: a huge shot, a huge shock. 573 00:26:01,359 --> 00:26:03,479 Speaker 4: I know it's a lot of people talk about this. 574 00:26:03,520 --> 00:26:06,679 Speaker 2: I know it's a sensitive topic with infertility, but I 575 00:26:06,720 --> 00:26:08,320 Speaker 2: know that stress is such a. 576 00:26:08,359 --> 00:26:13,200 Speaker 4: Huge cause in a lot of people, Like once they stop. 577 00:26:13,280 --> 00:26:15,920 Speaker 2: I always hear that once they are like not overthinking 578 00:26:15,920 --> 00:26:17,840 Speaker 2: it and not trying so hard, which I think is 579 00:26:17,880 --> 00:26:20,520 Speaker 2: so hard to It's hard, Like it's so easy to 580 00:26:20,560 --> 00:26:22,480 Speaker 2: just be like, well, don't stress about it and it'll happen, 581 00:26:22,520 --> 00:26:25,080 Speaker 2: But it's there's so much stress, and especially when you're 582 00:26:25,119 --> 00:26:26,200 Speaker 2: really wanting it. 583 00:26:26,160 --> 00:26:27,200 Speaker 5: You want one so bad. 584 00:26:27,520 --> 00:26:30,479 Speaker 2: Yeah, but I do think your your mentality. I do 585 00:26:30,600 --> 00:26:33,840 Speaker 2: think that that helps with a lot of people when 586 00:26:33,840 --> 00:26:37,360 Speaker 2: you're doing like acupuncture and things that limit your stress levels. 587 00:26:37,920 --> 00:26:42,760 Speaker 2: But do you all want more? 588 00:26:44,680 --> 00:26:49,040 Speaker 5: That's a sensitive topic for me because I I didn't 589 00:26:49,480 --> 00:26:51,520 Speaker 5: obviously I had my step kids and I'm so in 590 00:26:51,520 --> 00:26:56,400 Speaker 5: love with them, but having your own baby, oh my gosh, 591 00:26:56,440 --> 00:26:59,240 Speaker 5: it's like it's so hard to explain it until you 592 00:26:59,280 --> 00:27:02,560 Speaker 5: go through it. And I'd see my friends and my 593 00:27:02,600 --> 00:27:05,760 Speaker 5: friends be like jetting, like like jetting off, leaving the 594 00:27:05,840 --> 00:27:08,480 Speaker 5: kids with nannies, and I'm like, oh, that'll be me, 595 00:27:08,720 --> 00:27:10,679 Speaker 5: you know, I'm sure, And so I kind of went 596 00:27:10,720 --> 00:27:13,159 Speaker 5: into it very much like I'm going to still be 597 00:27:13,160 --> 00:27:16,720 Speaker 5: able to continue my life and Turk and I will 598 00:27:16,720 --> 00:27:19,119 Speaker 5: still have our time together. And then I had a 599 00:27:19,160 --> 00:27:22,280 Speaker 5: baby and I my friends are like, we're gonna have 600 00:27:22,280 --> 00:27:26,400 Speaker 5: an intervention because I never wanted to leave. I want 601 00:27:26,440 --> 00:27:28,320 Speaker 5: to be with him all the time. I still do. 602 00:27:28,680 --> 00:27:30,879 Speaker 5: He is like the light of my life. He's the 603 00:27:31,600 --> 00:27:34,920 Speaker 5: It makes me so happy. How could I not want more? 604 00:27:35,440 --> 00:27:39,240 Speaker 5: But my husband is very much done. So we're very 605 00:27:39,280 --> 00:27:41,840 Speaker 5: different on what we want with our future, which is 606 00:27:41,880 --> 00:27:43,440 Speaker 5: hard because you know you're in love with some one 607 00:27:43,480 --> 00:27:45,360 Speaker 5: and you have this strong marriage, but then you want 608 00:27:45,440 --> 00:27:50,880 Speaker 5: very different things. So we are in therapy talking through things, 609 00:27:51,200 --> 00:27:55,439 Speaker 5: and it's just something that like, we never went to 610 00:27:55,800 --> 00:27:58,000 Speaker 5: therapy together, which I wish we would have started it 611 00:27:58,080 --> 00:28:01,119 Speaker 5: sooner because I think it's such an amazing thing and 612 00:28:01,160 --> 00:28:04,920 Speaker 5: it helps communication. But we more recently, i'd say four 613 00:28:04,960 --> 00:28:07,919 Speaker 5: months ago, started going to therapy together and we go 614 00:28:08,000 --> 00:28:09,639 Speaker 5: twice a month, so we don't go every week, but 615 00:28:11,000 --> 00:28:13,400 Speaker 5: it just helps us, like talk through what I'm feeling, 616 00:28:13,440 --> 00:28:16,920 Speaker 5: and then his feelings and yeah, so I'm thirty seven. 617 00:28:16,960 --> 00:28:19,120 Speaker 5: I'm turning thirty eight this year. So for me, it's 618 00:28:19,200 --> 00:28:22,439 Speaker 5: kind of like now or never in a way, not 619 00:28:22,520 --> 00:28:25,160 Speaker 5: because you can't have babies older, but I don't want 620 00:28:25,160 --> 00:28:28,080 Speaker 5: to be forty having babies still because it's you know, 621 00:28:28,080 --> 00:28:29,960 Speaker 5: it's a lot it is. It takes up a lot 622 00:28:29,960 --> 00:28:33,359 Speaker 5: of your time, a lot of your life, and the 623 00:28:33,440 --> 00:28:36,280 Speaker 5: kids are my priority over myself, so I want. 624 00:28:36,160 --> 00:28:36,800 Speaker 3: To do it. 625 00:28:36,800 --> 00:28:39,240 Speaker 5: Get my body back, and it took a long time. 626 00:28:39,280 --> 00:28:39,680 Speaker 3: It's hard. 627 00:28:40,320 --> 00:28:43,640 Speaker 2: Thank you for sharing that because that was very honest. 628 00:28:43,640 --> 00:28:45,600 Speaker 2: And I also think a lot of people will be 629 00:28:45,600 --> 00:28:48,120 Speaker 2: able to relate to that because it's like you go 630 00:28:48,240 --> 00:28:51,960 Speaker 2: in to the relationship and the marriage not even thinking 631 00:28:52,000 --> 00:28:55,960 Speaker 2: you and want something. You get married, you get to 632 00:28:56,040 --> 00:28:58,600 Speaker 2: have you get to experience that love of having a child, 633 00:28:59,160 --> 00:29:00,239 Speaker 2: and then it's like now. 634 00:29:01,280 --> 00:29:02,840 Speaker 1: And I also want to commend you too, because I 635 00:29:02,880 --> 00:29:05,360 Speaker 1: feel like I don't know if it was the same 636 00:29:05,360 --> 00:29:06,920 Speaker 1: with you, but I had so many people in my 637 00:29:07,000 --> 00:29:11,320 Speaker 1: ear telling me like go run head for the hills, 638 00:29:11,440 --> 00:29:14,480 Speaker 1: like because we didn't align necessarily at the exact same 639 00:29:14,480 --> 00:29:17,840 Speaker 1: time with our wants of just for the future, and 640 00:29:17,880 --> 00:29:20,440 Speaker 1: I'm like, I think you have to give people time 641 00:29:20,520 --> 00:29:23,800 Speaker 1: and space to figure things out. Because for us, like 642 00:29:24,000 --> 00:29:26,360 Speaker 1: my I keep when I say my fiance my husband, 643 00:29:27,800 --> 00:29:31,440 Speaker 1: he uh, he was never I don't want any more kids, 644 00:29:31,480 --> 00:29:33,160 Speaker 1: but he was never like I want more kids. So 645 00:29:33,240 --> 00:29:35,560 Speaker 1: he was kind of just like in the middle. And 646 00:29:35,920 --> 00:29:37,280 Speaker 1: I got to a place where I was like, I 647 00:29:37,320 --> 00:29:40,200 Speaker 1: do want more. So if that's something, if that's something 648 00:29:40,200 --> 00:29:43,000 Speaker 1: that you're not wanting, then like I need at some point, 649 00:29:43,080 --> 00:29:44,520 Speaker 1: I need you to figure it out. So I kind 650 00:29:44,520 --> 00:29:46,320 Speaker 1: of like gave him the time in the space, and 651 00:29:46,360 --> 00:29:49,080 Speaker 1: I would have people in my ear being like, you can't. 652 00:29:48,920 --> 00:29:51,280 Speaker 3: Change a man. You can't change him. He doesn't want to, 653 00:29:51,400 --> 00:29:52,680 Speaker 3: you should leave him, leave him. 654 00:29:52,720 --> 00:29:54,320 Speaker 1: And I was like, I'm going to give him the 655 00:29:54,320 --> 00:29:56,240 Speaker 1: time and the space and the grace to like figure 656 00:29:56,280 --> 00:29:58,800 Speaker 1: it out. And then you figured it out, and like 657 00:29:58,840 --> 00:30:01,640 Speaker 1: he's so excited about that step in that next, you know, 658 00:30:01,680 --> 00:30:02,880 Speaker 1: phase of our relationship. 659 00:30:02,880 --> 00:30:05,760 Speaker 3: And I feel like it's really hard because. 660 00:30:06,920 --> 00:30:08,760 Speaker 1: You know, we're not I don't say like eighteen, but 661 00:30:08,800 --> 00:30:11,120 Speaker 1: it's like when you're eighteen or nineteen and twenty, when 662 00:30:11,160 --> 00:30:13,800 Speaker 1: you find this person, you're you're both single, you don't 663 00:30:13,840 --> 00:30:16,040 Speaker 1: have kids, and you know, there's you've lived a lot 664 00:30:16,080 --> 00:30:17,840 Speaker 1: of life and there's like a lot in there, and 665 00:30:17,880 --> 00:30:21,640 Speaker 1: I just feel like nobody really understands it unless you're 666 00:30:21,640 --> 00:30:21,960 Speaker 1: in it. 667 00:30:22,520 --> 00:30:24,280 Speaker 5: And men need more time. 668 00:30:24,120 --> 00:30:26,240 Speaker 1: To it's also black and white, yeah, and I think 669 00:30:26,240 --> 00:30:28,600 Speaker 1: a lot of people think that relationships are very black 670 00:30:28,640 --> 00:30:29,120 Speaker 1: or white. 671 00:30:29,600 --> 00:30:32,479 Speaker 5: Yeah, it's not clearly like your situation and mine, and 672 00:30:33,400 --> 00:30:36,280 Speaker 5: men need time to process things. And for me, I'm like, 673 00:30:36,280 --> 00:30:38,160 Speaker 5: I wish I would have brought up having another baby 674 00:30:38,560 --> 00:30:41,520 Speaker 5: sooner after we had Tristan. But you know, postpartum two 675 00:30:41,640 --> 00:30:44,680 Speaker 5: is like really hard. Like I didn't have depression, but 676 00:30:44,800 --> 00:30:48,880 Speaker 5: like you go through crazy hormoneous changes. You're taking care 677 00:30:48,920 --> 00:30:51,760 Speaker 5: of this like little human that needs you. It's not 678 00:30:51,760 --> 00:30:54,480 Speaker 5: like you can just leave and like go like they 679 00:30:54,560 --> 00:30:57,080 Speaker 5: need you. And I breastfed for a long time. I mean, 680 00:30:57,920 --> 00:30:59,720 Speaker 5: I guess what's a long time now, but a long 681 00:30:59,760 --> 00:31:01,720 Speaker 5: time for me, Like it was a lot. I wrestled 682 00:31:01,800 --> 00:31:03,800 Speaker 5: for eight months and that is a long time. It's 683 00:31:03,840 --> 00:31:06,880 Speaker 5: a long time. And my milk it was really challenging. 684 00:31:06,920 --> 00:31:10,040 Speaker 5: He had tongue taih lip tongue tie, lip high and 685 00:31:10,160 --> 00:31:13,160 Speaker 5: cheek tie, and so breastfeeding wasn't just like a natural 686 00:31:13,200 --> 00:31:14,680 Speaker 5: thing for me, Like I thought it was gonna be, Oh, 687 00:31:14,720 --> 00:31:16,640 Speaker 5: you put him on the boob and you can breastfeed 688 00:31:16,680 --> 00:31:19,680 Speaker 5: in public. Like No, it was very challenging for me. 689 00:31:19,840 --> 00:31:23,640 Speaker 5: And you feel like, you know, as a mom, you're 690 00:31:23,720 --> 00:31:25,840 Speaker 5: like there's a lot of pressure to be like a 691 00:31:25,840 --> 00:31:28,640 Speaker 5: perfect mom, and you know you have outside people like 692 00:31:29,320 --> 00:31:31,320 Speaker 5: I still get screen iced he sucks on passies and 693 00:31:31,320 --> 00:31:33,840 Speaker 5: people are like attacking me that he sucks on passes. 694 00:31:33,840 --> 00:31:34,240 Speaker 4: He's two. 695 00:31:35,000 --> 00:31:38,480 Speaker 5: You know, it's like he's a baby still and who 696 00:31:38,800 --> 00:31:39,840 Speaker 5: cares it makes him happy? 697 00:31:39,880 --> 00:31:42,360 Speaker 3: You know, And when are they supposed to stop doing that? 698 00:31:43,080 --> 00:31:45,280 Speaker 5: I don't know, seriously, if you like look it up, 699 00:31:45,360 --> 00:31:48,400 Speaker 5: I guess it says by like tube. But his dentist 700 00:31:48,520 --> 00:31:50,240 Speaker 5: is like he can even suck one until he's four. 701 00:31:50,320 --> 00:31:52,600 Speaker 5: Nothing he's going to but like, yeah, I'm like, listen, 702 00:31:52,680 --> 00:31:55,240 Speaker 5: he's a baby. He just turned two years old. He's 703 00:31:55,240 --> 00:31:58,800 Speaker 5: my little baby. I'm not gonna like yeah anyways. So 704 00:31:58,840 --> 00:32:01,600 Speaker 5: it's just like shutting out the outside noise of what 705 00:32:01,680 --> 00:32:04,000 Speaker 5: kind of mom you should be, and there's a lot 706 00:32:04,040 --> 00:32:06,720 Speaker 5: of pressure, and then postpartum is no joke. You're trying 707 00:32:06,720 --> 00:32:08,120 Speaker 5: to figure out how to be a good wife. I 708 00:32:08,400 --> 00:32:11,280 Speaker 5: be a good step mom. I was back to like filming, 709 00:32:11,320 --> 00:32:13,600 Speaker 5: I was doing interviews. I was trying to take care 710 00:32:13,600 --> 00:32:15,600 Speaker 5: of it a newborn who I've never taken care of 711 00:32:15,600 --> 00:32:16,960 Speaker 5: a newborn. I don't know how to I don't know 712 00:32:17,000 --> 00:32:19,200 Speaker 5: how to change diapers. So I was like learning all 713 00:32:19,200 --> 00:32:22,760 Speaker 5: these things, and you know, you're going through all the 714 00:32:22,960 --> 00:32:26,000 Speaker 5: bleeding and the everything. It's just crazy what your body 715 00:32:26,000 --> 00:32:29,640 Speaker 5: goes through, and like trying to still be a good wife. 716 00:32:29,680 --> 00:32:31,640 Speaker 5: And then the man kind of expects you, not expects you, 717 00:32:31,680 --> 00:32:33,520 Speaker 5: but like they're used to a certain woman, right, and 718 00:32:33,560 --> 00:32:37,080 Speaker 5: then you're like going through all these changes. They'll never understand. 719 00:32:37,200 --> 00:32:40,040 Speaker 5: It's trying to explain it to them. And like he 720 00:32:40,160 --> 00:32:42,800 Speaker 5: was supportive, but then at some point they're out. He 721 00:32:43,000 --> 00:32:45,880 Speaker 5: was out going back to work and traveling still and 722 00:32:45,920 --> 00:32:48,080 Speaker 5: I'm home with this baby. Yeah, And him and I 723 00:32:48,120 --> 00:32:51,480 Speaker 5: were so used to being like joined at the hip, inseparable, 724 00:32:51,880 --> 00:32:53,800 Speaker 5: and then all of a sudden, I'm home with the baby. 725 00:32:54,200 --> 00:32:56,560 Speaker 5: He's taking the bigger kids out to go do things, 726 00:32:56,600 --> 00:32:59,440 Speaker 5: he's traveling, he's out working, he's at the office, and 727 00:32:59,480 --> 00:33:01,880 Speaker 5: I'm just like at home with this baby. It was 728 00:33:02,200 --> 00:33:03,800 Speaker 5: really hard for me because I was used to like 729 00:33:03,840 --> 00:33:05,560 Speaker 5: go go, go up until I gave birth. I was 730 00:33:05,600 --> 00:33:08,800 Speaker 5: filming two shows, Selling Sunset and The Flipping Ail moosays, 731 00:33:09,000 --> 00:33:11,160 Speaker 5: so I was used to being on the go NonStop 732 00:33:11,200 --> 00:33:12,240 Speaker 5: and then all of a sudden, you're home with a 733 00:33:12,240 --> 00:33:13,640 Speaker 5: baby and that's your life. 734 00:33:13,800 --> 00:33:15,960 Speaker 1: One of our producers was we did like a whole 735 00:33:16,000 --> 00:33:17,840 Speaker 1: episode on that too, and she was saying like, I've 736 00:33:17,880 --> 00:33:21,120 Speaker 1: never like she's in a super healthy, happy marriage and 737 00:33:21,160 --> 00:33:25,320 Speaker 1: she's like, I've never had any sort of like uh resentment, 738 00:33:25,520 --> 00:33:28,680 Speaker 1: resentment to my husband until we had the baby. And 739 00:33:28,720 --> 00:33:30,480 Speaker 1: I can't remember what his porternity leave was, but he 740 00:33:30,560 --> 00:33:32,040 Speaker 1: went back and he would just like go to work 741 00:33:32,080 --> 00:33:33,719 Speaker 1: and she would just be like at home. And I 742 00:33:33,760 --> 00:33:37,880 Speaker 1: was like, wow, that's like it's very interesting change for 743 00:33:37,920 --> 00:33:41,680 Speaker 1: the word huge, like major, and you're not you don't 744 00:33:41,760 --> 00:33:43,440 Speaker 1: know what to expect if you haven't had one. I 745 00:33:43,480 --> 00:33:46,000 Speaker 1: think second time is always very different because you know 746 00:33:46,040 --> 00:33:49,000 Speaker 1: what to expect, you know the routine, You kind of 747 00:33:49,040 --> 00:33:51,600 Speaker 1: know what a baby's gonna need generally, like they're all different, 748 00:33:51,680 --> 00:33:54,480 Speaker 1: but you kind of know how you're going to handle postpartum. 749 00:33:54,640 --> 00:33:58,840 Speaker 5: And but I think to my husband's worried that if 750 00:33:58,840 --> 00:34:01,280 Speaker 5: we have another one we're never going to see each other. 751 00:34:01,360 --> 00:34:03,920 Speaker 5: It's like we're never going to have our quality time together. 752 00:34:04,680 --> 00:34:09,000 Speaker 5: We already have now three imaginating another one. And he's like, 753 00:34:09,320 --> 00:34:12,200 Speaker 5: I've been raising babies since I was in my twenties. 754 00:34:12,200 --> 00:34:14,600 Speaker 5: You know, I'm ready to be done, honey. Yeah. And me, 755 00:34:14,719 --> 00:34:15,880 Speaker 5: I'm like, but I just started. 756 00:34:16,280 --> 00:34:16,640 Speaker 2: Yeah. 757 00:34:17,120 --> 00:34:19,040 Speaker 5: Yeah, that's kind of where we're at. You know, we're 758 00:34:19,040 --> 00:34:22,200 Speaker 5: talking through it. Yeah, thank you, I really want one. 759 00:34:22,400 --> 00:34:23,000 Speaker 5: He doesn't. 760 00:34:23,239 --> 00:34:26,080 Speaker 1: Yeah, No, I really appreciate you, like opening up about that, 761 00:34:26,120 --> 00:34:30,160 Speaker 1: because you could have literally just said to us like no, no, yes. 762 00:34:30,280 --> 00:34:33,440 Speaker 5: Really, I like it's like, you know, there there's a 763 00:34:33,480 --> 00:34:36,680 Speaker 5: lot of layers to relationships in life, and we came 764 00:34:36,719 --> 00:34:39,520 Speaker 5: into a complicated situation. You know, it's been it's been 765 00:34:39,560 --> 00:34:41,640 Speaker 5: amazing and beautiful, but it's very complicated. 766 00:34:42,200 --> 00:34:46,480 Speaker 2: Yeah. I was gonna say, I mean, you must have 767 00:34:46,640 --> 00:34:49,759 Speaker 2: really I felt like Tark was your person because you 768 00:34:49,880 --> 00:34:54,399 Speaker 2: really took on a lot. Like really, I'm thinking, I'm 769 00:34:54,440 --> 00:34:57,480 Speaker 2: like listening to all this that you've you know, navigated 770 00:34:57,520 --> 00:34:59,839 Speaker 2: since being in this relationship, and you must have. Really 771 00:35:00,000 --> 00:35:01,480 Speaker 2: I felt like this is the person I'm supposed to 772 00:35:01,520 --> 00:35:04,000 Speaker 2: be with, and yeah, I'm going to fight till the end. 773 00:35:03,880 --> 00:35:05,799 Speaker 1: To I don't think you would do it if it 774 00:35:05,880 --> 00:35:08,040 Speaker 1: wasn't No, no, no, because it was a lot. 775 00:35:08,520 --> 00:35:11,200 Speaker 5: But yeah, I mean we are best friends, we're soulmates. 776 00:35:11,440 --> 00:35:13,759 Speaker 5: Obviously you go through your issues and you know every 777 00:35:13,760 --> 00:35:16,440 Speaker 5: marriage has them, but in the end, like we are 778 00:35:16,600 --> 00:35:18,719 Speaker 5: each other's rock and we're best friends and we just 779 00:35:18,760 --> 00:35:20,080 Speaker 5: support each other through everything. 780 00:35:20,880 --> 00:35:22,600 Speaker 4: I want to talk about this. 781 00:35:23,120 --> 00:35:26,240 Speaker 3: Yeah, let's talk about business. I want to get your number. 782 00:35:27,880 --> 00:35:32,359 Speaker 2: I want to talk about business because first of all, 783 00:35:32,400 --> 00:35:34,640 Speaker 2: you're such a virgo I get are you very much 784 00:35:34,719 --> 00:35:35,680 Speaker 2: like a perfectionist? 785 00:35:35,680 --> 00:35:38,759 Speaker 5: Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, oh yes, too much? 786 00:35:39,400 --> 00:35:41,480 Speaker 3: Like do you anea Graham one? Do you know that? 787 00:35:41,560 --> 00:35:43,239 Speaker 5: I don't know. I you know, I feel like I 788 00:35:43,239 --> 00:35:45,319 Speaker 5: did that? Did I do that test? I think I 789 00:35:45,320 --> 00:35:46,000 Speaker 5: did it. I don't remember. 790 00:35:46,080 --> 00:35:47,120 Speaker 3: It was trendy for a minute. 791 00:35:47,360 --> 00:35:48,440 Speaker 5: Yeah, I don't remember what I am. 792 00:35:48,640 --> 00:35:50,200 Speaker 3: Okay, the perfectionist is number one. 793 00:35:50,239 --> 00:35:50,839 Speaker 5: Yeah, but I. 794 00:35:50,760 --> 00:35:52,960 Speaker 2: Also see you being a nine, which is like your 795 00:35:53,120 --> 00:35:56,040 Speaker 2: peacemaker and like you you want people to be like 796 00:35:56,080 --> 00:35:57,120 Speaker 2: happy with you. 797 00:35:57,400 --> 00:35:59,960 Speaker 5: And how oh yeah, happy with me. I don't like 798 00:36:00,000 --> 00:36:02,400 Speaker 5: when people are upset at me. Yeah, or if like 799 00:36:02,440 --> 00:36:05,080 Speaker 5: it's nothing, I'm like, are you okay? What did I 800 00:36:05,120 --> 00:36:07,279 Speaker 5: do nothing. I'm fine. I was just running into the 801 00:36:07,280 --> 00:36:09,799 Speaker 5: grocery store. I'm like, Okay, you know I don't like Yeah, 802 00:36:09,840 --> 00:36:12,560 Speaker 5: I don't like any kind of tension or even like 803 00:36:12,600 --> 00:36:14,520 Speaker 5: in my business, if I have to lay down the law, 804 00:36:15,200 --> 00:36:16,839 Speaker 5: I then like feel guilty that I had to lay 805 00:36:16,840 --> 00:36:17,239 Speaker 5: down the law. 806 00:36:17,320 --> 00:36:20,040 Speaker 4: Yeah, so that's what I'm trying. I'm like, I see 807 00:36:20,040 --> 00:36:20,920 Speaker 4: you as this person. 808 00:36:21,120 --> 00:36:25,040 Speaker 2: I'm like, as you're talking, I'm like, okay, she she's 809 00:36:25,200 --> 00:36:29,000 Speaker 2: a peacemaker, she's a perfectionist, and she's a businesswoman. So 810 00:36:29,040 --> 00:36:31,680 Speaker 2: how do all three of those coexist together? Because you 811 00:36:31,760 --> 00:36:33,960 Speaker 2: do so many things, Like we're looking at your bio 812 00:36:34,000 --> 00:36:38,400 Speaker 2: and Tonya goes, she does a thousand, where do we start? 813 00:36:40,239 --> 00:36:44,120 Speaker 5: Well, Launching Heather Iay Essentials was a huge moment for 814 00:36:44,280 --> 00:36:48,160 Speaker 5: me because I, you know, three and a half years well, 815 00:36:48,200 --> 00:36:50,080 Speaker 5: I guess we talked about this off camera. So Heather 816 00:36:50,120 --> 00:36:53,440 Speaker 5: I Essentials is my beauty line that I launched just 817 00:36:54,239 --> 00:36:56,880 Speaker 5: last month. What are we in March February fourteenth. But 818 00:36:57,040 --> 00:36:58,680 Speaker 5: I sat on it. I worked on it for a 819 00:36:58,680 --> 00:37:01,200 Speaker 5: long time, and then I was kind of afraid to 820 00:37:01,280 --> 00:37:04,480 Speaker 5: launch because launching something is it can either do really 821 00:37:04,520 --> 00:37:07,520 Speaker 5: amazing or it can fall flat, and I was just 822 00:37:07,560 --> 00:37:09,359 Speaker 5: a little bit nervous, like what was going to happen. 823 00:37:09,440 --> 00:37:13,000 Speaker 5: And everything was self funded. We had some partners at 824 00:37:13,000 --> 00:37:16,080 Speaker 5: the time, but everything was me and Tark doing everything 825 00:37:16,120 --> 00:37:19,960 Speaker 5: pretty much, and I was like, I don't have marketing money. 826 00:37:20,040 --> 00:37:21,680 Speaker 5: I'm just going to do this on my own, and 827 00:37:21,719 --> 00:37:24,320 Speaker 5: so I was a little bit nervous. And then finally 828 00:37:24,360 --> 00:37:26,600 Speaker 5: I'm like, let's go, let's just do it, and we 829 00:37:26,680 --> 00:37:28,920 Speaker 5: sold out in two hours I'm sorry, two days. 830 00:37:29,200 --> 00:37:29,560 Speaker 6: Wow. 831 00:37:29,600 --> 00:37:33,400 Speaker 5: So that was like a huge, very exciting moment for me. 832 00:37:33,640 --> 00:37:37,880 Speaker 5: But launching a business and running a business, it's NonStop. 833 00:37:37,920 --> 00:37:40,719 Speaker 5: It's like twenty four to seven. And because I am 834 00:37:40,760 --> 00:37:44,440 Speaker 5: such a perfectionist, I'm like on top of every single thing. 835 00:37:44,480 --> 00:37:47,040 Speaker 5: It's hard to let control go. And it's such a 836 00:37:47,040 --> 00:37:49,880 Speaker 5: baby brand still that I'm very involved with everything. But 837 00:37:50,400 --> 00:37:53,320 Speaker 5: I have a really good team behind me, hard workers, 838 00:37:53,880 --> 00:37:57,319 Speaker 5: positive people, like we're like a very strong team and 839 00:37:58,520 --> 00:38:01,680 Speaker 5: we're all growing it together. But that's been a challenge. 840 00:38:01,719 --> 00:38:04,279 Speaker 5: It's like I don't have any downtime because all my 841 00:38:04,360 --> 00:38:07,920 Speaker 5: downtime is Heathery Essentials, Like I'm just that's all I'm 842 00:38:07,920 --> 00:38:08,560 Speaker 5: working on now. 843 00:38:09,239 --> 00:38:10,239 Speaker 4: I mean, that's so fun. 844 00:38:10,280 --> 00:38:12,400 Speaker 2: Too. I mean, you've had so many different mediums in 845 00:38:12,440 --> 00:38:15,400 Speaker 2: your work. So you worked on homes, which also is 846 00:38:15,440 --> 00:38:18,759 Speaker 2: like there is an element of beauty and design, but 847 00:38:18,880 --> 00:38:22,040 Speaker 2: then you take on your own your own line, you 848 00:38:22,120 --> 00:38:25,160 Speaker 2: put your name on it. You're formulating it, like going 849 00:38:25,200 --> 00:38:28,239 Speaker 2: to the labs and doing test And was there any 850 00:38:28,239 --> 00:38:32,200 Speaker 2: point where you were like, just stop it, stop production. 851 00:38:32,560 --> 00:38:35,160 Speaker 4: I'm not doing it. I'm staying with what I'm safe with. 852 00:38:35,400 --> 00:38:38,600 Speaker 5: It was more after like everything was made, everything was ready, 853 00:38:38,680 --> 00:38:41,400 Speaker 5: and I'm like, God, can I do this? And I 854 00:38:41,440 --> 00:38:44,080 Speaker 5: think anyone that's like never launched a business like you 855 00:38:44,400 --> 00:38:46,880 Speaker 5: and you're starting out like is is it going to 856 00:38:46,920 --> 00:38:49,000 Speaker 5: be successful? And plus I have a name, right and 857 00:38:49,040 --> 00:38:51,920 Speaker 5: like if it didn't do well, I'm like, that's embarrassing 858 00:38:51,960 --> 00:38:54,000 Speaker 5: for me too. And so those are all like real 859 00:38:54,040 --> 00:38:55,880 Speaker 5: thoughts that I was having. But at the same time, 860 00:38:56,360 --> 00:38:59,880 Speaker 5: my husband, he's an entrepreneur. He is so incredible. He 861 00:39:01,040 --> 00:39:03,480 Speaker 5: will get knocked down, he fights back and he's just 862 00:39:04,239 --> 00:39:07,799 Speaker 5: it doesn't nothing bothers him, and where I'm like what 863 00:39:07,960 --> 00:39:10,640 Speaker 5: is this, then He's like, that's an entrepreneur. Just go 864 00:39:10,760 --> 00:39:13,440 Speaker 5: for it. And if we fall down, we get back 865 00:39:13,480 --> 00:39:15,719 Speaker 5: up and we figure out like how to make it better, 866 00:39:15,760 --> 00:39:18,120 Speaker 5: and we strategize and I'm like, you know what, Okay, 867 00:39:18,239 --> 00:39:21,400 Speaker 5: let's do it then, and just having like that motivator 868 00:39:21,560 --> 00:39:24,120 Speaker 5: where he's like, it's fine, whatever happens, happens, let's just go. 869 00:39:24,520 --> 00:39:25,920 Speaker 5: So he kind of like pushed me to be like, 870 00:39:26,040 --> 00:39:28,520 Speaker 5: let's just do it. And I pulled it together and 871 00:39:28,560 --> 00:39:32,000 Speaker 5: we launched. Redid it with me. We launched and like 872 00:39:32,280 --> 00:39:33,920 Speaker 5: I was like, let's go, and it was like what 873 00:39:34,040 --> 00:39:36,160 Speaker 5: a week and we're like, let's go, and we did 874 00:39:36,200 --> 00:39:37,720 Speaker 5: it and it all came together. 875 00:39:38,560 --> 00:39:41,439 Speaker 2: I think it makes such a difference having someone who 876 00:39:42,080 --> 00:39:44,480 Speaker 2: obviously knows you better than anyone else. 877 00:39:44,280 --> 00:39:47,000 Speaker 4: Who's like, go for it. What's the worst. 878 00:39:47,080 --> 00:39:48,839 Speaker 2: The worst thing that can happen is that you don't 879 00:39:48,880 --> 00:39:51,879 Speaker 2: even try. Like the product is ready, so what it's 880 00:39:51,920 --> 00:39:52,360 Speaker 2: just gonna go. 881 00:39:52,360 --> 00:39:54,920 Speaker 5: To waste, It's gonna sit there expire, and then what Yeah. 882 00:39:54,920 --> 00:39:56,799 Speaker 2: If you've already put the money and time into it, 883 00:39:56,840 --> 00:39:58,640 Speaker 2: why wantn't you go for it? 884 00:39:58,760 --> 00:40:01,200 Speaker 5: We sell ton, we sell tone, and we ended up 885 00:40:01,239 --> 00:40:05,600 Speaker 5: selling thousands and thousands, and I was like, yay, thank god. 886 00:40:05,880 --> 00:40:09,759 Speaker 2: What's your like long term goal for Heather Ray Essentials? 887 00:40:09,960 --> 00:40:12,400 Speaker 5: I want to keep growing it. I have more products 888 00:40:12,480 --> 00:40:15,239 Speaker 5: launching in April. So we launched three lip glosses so far, 889 00:40:16,400 --> 00:40:18,919 Speaker 5: more products launching the end of April for Mother's Day. 890 00:40:19,280 --> 00:40:21,520 Speaker 5: I'm not lip glosses, It'll be something else, and then 891 00:40:21,560 --> 00:40:24,520 Speaker 5: I have another lip gloss i' launching for summer, and 892 00:40:24,560 --> 00:40:26,560 Speaker 5: then I have more that are ready to go into production, 893 00:40:26,840 --> 00:40:29,480 Speaker 5: and then I'm now planning, like what's next. It could 894 00:40:29,520 --> 00:40:32,160 Speaker 5: take about a year to really, like once you have 895 00:40:32,200 --> 00:40:35,040 Speaker 5: an idea, to come out with a formula and get 896 00:40:35,040 --> 00:40:39,040 Speaker 5: everything ready. So I'm starting to plan that. But my 897 00:40:39,120 --> 00:40:41,640 Speaker 5: goal is to grow it and just be bigger, make 898 00:40:41,960 --> 00:40:46,200 Speaker 5: millions and millions hopefully, and just build relationships with my customers. 899 00:40:46,239 --> 00:40:48,520 Speaker 5: And that's the most important to me, is the relationships. 900 00:40:48,560 --> 00:40:51,720 Speaker 5: And if someone's not happy like that upsets me so much. 901 00:40:52,080 --> 00:40:55,840 Speaker 5: Going back to my you know, but I want my 902 00:40:56,000 --> 00:40:58,399 Speaker 5: fans and my customers to love what I put out. 903 00:40:58,480 --> 00:41:01,840 Speaker 5: It's quality products, and that was really important to me. 904 00:41:01,880 --> 00:41:03,480 Speaker 5: I could have just slapped my name on something and 905 00:41:03,480 --> 00:41:05,799 Speaker 5: put it out there, but I wanted it to be 906 00:41:05,880 --> 00:41:08,160 Speaker 5: mine and I wanted to like be every step of 907 00:41:08,200 --> 00:41:10,000 Speaker 5: the way involved, and that's what I did. So I'm 908 00:41:10,080 --> 00:41:10,759 Speaker 5: very proud of it. 909 00:41:11,239 --> 00:41:15,560 Speaker 2: I love that I think people see, especially when there's 910 00:41:15,960 --> 00:41:19,320 Speaker 2: a public figure's name attached to something, that they feel 911 00:41:19,320 --> 00:41:22,920 Speaker 2: like it Some people do. I think they just here's 912 00:41:23,120 --> 00:41:25,200 Speaker 2: my product with my name on it, and there's not 913 00:41:25,320 --> 00:41:29,799 Speaker 2: as much intention behind it, I guess, But I do 914 00:41:29,880 --> 00:41:32,600 Speaker 2: think there's that feeling when you do it yourself and 915 00:41:32,640 --> 00:41:34,880 Speaker 2: you've put the work into it, and you know, you know, 916 00:41:35,200 --> 00:41:37,919 Speaker 2: like the ingredients center in what you're putting out. 917 00:41:38,440 --> 00:41:40,799 Speaker 4: It makes you feel proud when it especially when it 918 00:41:40,840 --> 00:41:41,200 Speaker 4: does well. 919 00:41:41,360 --> 00:41:43,360 Speaker 5: So proud. Yeah, yeah, I love that. 920 00:41:43,640 --> 00:41:46,120 Speaker 2: Did you have a brand that you first of all, 921 00:41:46,160 --> 00:41:47,719 Speaker 2: what made you want to do a beauty line? And 922 00:41:47,719 --> 00:41:49,319 Speaker 2: second well, did you have a brand that you were like, 923 00:41:50,600 --> 00:41:51,799 Speaker 2: I love how they're doing this. 924 00:41:53,200 --> 00:41:56,359 Speaker 5: You know, I've really now that I've launched, I'm really 925 00:41:56,400 --> 00:42:01,000 Speaker 5: looking at other brands and I'm I'm so proud of 926 00:42:01,000 --> 00:42:03,000 Speaker 5: them because i know what it takes and I'm like, wow, 927 00:42:03,160 --> 00:42:06,320 Speaker 5: like I'm so impressed by what they did and especially 928 00:42:06,360 --> 00:42:08,719 Speaker 5: starting as like a small brand. And yes, I do 929 00:42:08,760 --> 00:42:10,239 Speaker 5: have a name, but it's not like I have this 930 00:42:10,360 --> 00:42:13,840 Speaker 5: like a ton of money like behind it. You know, 931 00:42:13,880 --> 00:42:15,720 Speaker 5: it was a lot of it was just self funded. 932 00:42:15,840 --> 00:42:19,560 Speaker 5: So summer Fridays, like I feel like, they did an 933 00:42:19,600 --> 00:42:23,640 Speaker 5: incredible job starting with the one product and then really 934 00:42:23,760 --> 00:42:25,840 Speaker 5: killing it on that one product, and now they've branched 935 00:42:25,840 --> 00:42:29,040 Speaker 5: out with them and their marketing is so amazing. And 936 00:42:30,400 --> 00:42:33,279 Speaker 5: I was using a lot of non toxic brands and 937 00:42:35,000 --> 00:42:36,920 Speaker 5: I get sent a lot of stuff, you know, obviously, 938 00:42:36,960 --> 00:42:39,200 Speaker 5: and I would like try things here and there, and 939 00:42:39,320 --> 00:42:42,960 Speaker 5: I was like, I don't this consistency, the color, like, 940 00:42:43,160 --> 00:42:46,160 Speaker 5: there's no scent to it, it smells, grows, Oh, it's so toxic. 941 00:42:46,280 --> 00:42:49,400 Speaker 5: And so I started like really looking into things and 942 00:42:49,600 --> 00:42:52,359 Speaker 5: ingredients and finding out that a lot of brands are 943 00:42:52,400 --> 00:42:57,200 Speaker 5: not transparent with what they're using. And I was like 944 00:42:57,239 --> 00:42:58,919 Speaker 5: trying ones that I really liked, and I'm like, Okay, 945 00:42:58,920 --> 00:43:01,200 Speaker 5: well what are they doing? What don't I like about this? 946 00:43:01,239 --> 00:43:03,120 Speaker 5: And I'm like, I really want to create my own wine, 947 00:43:03,200 --> 00:43:07,120 Speaker 5: my beauty line. And I've always been passionate about like 948 00:43:07,160 --> 00:43:10,200 Speaker 5: skincare and wellness and beauty, and I have my asthetation license, 949 00:43:10,360 --> 00:43:14,120 Speaker 5: so I just was like very passionate about the beauty world. 950 00:43:14,280 --> 00:43:18,839 Speaker 5: And then my old partner was like, oh, well, why 951 00:43:18,840 --> 00:43:22,239 Speaker 5: don't we just white label? And it's not me because 952 00:43:22,239 --> 00:43:24,319 Speaker 5: even when brands send me things or I get a 953 00:43:24,320 --> 00:43:27,520 Speaker 5: brand deal from my agent, I'm like, I don't believe 954 00:43:27,520 --> 00:43:29,680 Speaker 5: in that product. I can't post about it. So that's 955 00:43:29,760 --> 00:43:31,400 Speaker 5: very much who I am. Even if they offer a 956 00:43:31,400 --> 00:43:33,280 Speaker 5: great amount of money, I'm like, no, I just can't 957 00:43:33,280 --> 00:43:35,600 Speaker 5: do that. I can't be fake with it. So I 958 00:43:35,640 --> 00:43:38,839 Speaker 5: just wanted to be transparent with my consumers and put 959 00:43:38,840 --> 00:43:41,480 Speaker 5: out something that they knew what they were putting on 960 00:43:41,520 --> 00:43:44,279 Speaker 5: their body. And that was really important to me. 961 00:43:44,960 --> 00:43:46,839 Speaker 4: I love that. I think it's really hard. 962 00:43:46,840 --> 00:43:50,000 Speaker 2: I've had ideas of wanting to start beauty, hair care 963 00:43:50,080 --> 00:43:54,799 Speaker 2: and beauty stuff, and it's so overwhelming to even know 964 00:43:54,840 --> 00:43:57,040 Speaker 2: where to begin. So I am so impressed that you 965 00:43:57,080 --> 00:43:57,880 Speaker 2: did that on top. 966 00:43:57,719 --> 00:43:59,239 Speaker 3: Of all everything else. 967 00:43:59,320 --> 00:44:02,640 Speaker 5: Thanks finding good people that can help you that are 968 00:44:03,120 --> 00:44:07,040 Speaker 5: experts in that department, Like that's what I did. I 969 00:44:07,160 --> 00:44:09,600 Speaker 5: had someone that was they had been working with a 970 00:44:09,600 --> 00:44:13,600 Speaker 5: bunch of brands, they fulfilled other products, like they knew chemists, 971 00:44:13,640 --> 00:44:17,319 Speaker 5: so you know, they helped me align everything. Because I'm 972 00:44:17,320 --> 00:44:18,919 Speaker 5: not a chemist. I don't know you know, I don't 973 00:44:18,960 --> 00:44:21,200 Speaker 5: know what ingredients go well together. I can I just 974 00:44:21,239 --> 00:44:23,200 Speaker 5: know what I like. So it was like testing so 975 00:44:23,280 --> 00:44:27,360 Speaker 5: many different consistencies and even the wand like the wand 976 00:44:27,400 --> 00:44:29,400 Speaker 5: shape I have is you know, it's not like a 977 00:44:29,440 --> 00:44:32,759 Speaker 5: normal wand shape. So it's like testing like so many 978 00:44:32,800 --> 00:44:36,719 Speaker 5: wands and the packaging and the ingredients and the stickiness 979 00:44:36,760 --> 00:44:38,880 Speaker 5: and the scent. It was like and I wanted the 980 00:44:38,920 --> 00:44:41,440 Speaker 5: scent to be natural. I didn't want it to be synthetics. 981 00:44:41,480 --> 00:44:45,440 Speaker 5: So it's just a flavor, vanilla flavor, and like finding 982 00:44:45,800 --> 00:44:48,000 Speaker 5: the flavor that wasn't synthetic. It was just it was 983 00:44:48,080 --> 00:44:50,239 Speaker 5: a lot of work, Yeah, but it was fun. It 984 00:44:50,280 --> 00:44:51,400 Speaker 5: was a lot of work and then you see it 985 00:44:51,440 --> 00:44:53,520 Speaker 5: all come together and it's so special. 986 00:44:53,800 --> 00:44:54,480 Speaker 4: Well, I love it. 987 00:44:54,520 --> 00:44:57,480 Speaker 5: I mean, thank you. 988 00:45:11,800 --> 00:45:14,200 Speaker 4: Do you have any guilty pleasures? Are you a reality 989 00:45:14,480 --> 00:45:16,520 Speaker 4: Do you like reality TV? Do you like script it? 990 00:45:16,560 --> 00:45:19,120 Speaker 4: What's your yes? If you're just sitting down to relax, 991 00:45:19,160 --> 00:45:19,920 Speaker 4: what are you going for? 992 00:45:20,080 --> 00:45:22,800 Speaker 5: So my husband's out of town this weekend and I 993 00:45:23,280 --> 00:45:25,279 Speaker 5: miss him, but it's also my time to like have 994 00:45:25,360 --> 00:45:28,080 Speaker 5: like my girl time. Because when you get married or 995 00:45:28,120 --> 00:45:30,239 Speaker 5: like you're in a relationship, right like at nights, a 996 00:45:30,280 --> 00:45:32,160 Speaker 5: lot of the time you spend with your significant other, 997 00:45:32,680 --> 00:45:35,440 Speaker 5: you don't really have a lot of girl time. And 998 00:45:35,520 --> 00:45:39,799 Speaker 5: so I'm gonna watch I love the Kardashians and do 999 00:45:39,880 --> 00:45:44,200 Speaker 5: my face masks. And then I'm watching Housewives of Beverly 1000 00:45:44,280 --> 00:45:48,680 Speaker 5: Hills and I was just telling Bree, like I want 1001 00:45:48,680 --> 00:45:50,959 Speaker 5: to get into like Love Island, but they're also young. 1002 00:45:51,000 --> 00:45:53,239 Speaker 5: I don't know if I can, are you. 1003 00:45:53,440 --> 00:45:58,560 Speaker 1: I've watched almost watch Love Island UK season five is 1004 00:45:58,560 --> 00:46:01,000 Speaker 1: a great one to start if you're like just starting 1005 00:46:01,080 --> 00:46:03,600 Speaker 1: because it's like just really really good. 1006 00:46:04,280 --> 00:46:05,759 Speaker 3: Love Island UK Season. 1007 00:46:05,440 --> 00:46:08,480 Speaker 5: Eight is also fantastic, So five and eight, five and 1008 00:46:08,520 --> 00:46:10,640 Speaker 5: eight in the UK, okay, and then. 1009 00:46:12,000 --> 00:46:13,719 Speaker 3: USA the last one that just aired. I don't know 1010 00:46:13,760 --> 00:46:14,479 Speaker 3: what season it. 1011 00:46:14,480 --> 00:46:17,160 Speaker 2: Was, three or two, two or four. 1012 00:46:17,280 --> 00:46:17,680 Speaker 3: I don't know. 1013 00:46:18,160 --> 00:46:20,359 Speaker 1: The last season of USA that just aired is also 1014 00:46:20,440 --> 00:46:21,560 Speaker 1: fantastic television. 1015 00:46:21,920 --> 00:46:23,160 Speaker 3: But I'd start with one of those three. 1016 00:46:23,239 --> 00:46:25,719 Speaker 2: Okay, But I will say she's been trying to me 1017 00:46:25,760 --> 00:46:28,000 Speaker 2: watch it forever, and she said to UK season five. 1018 00:46:28,120 --> 00:46:30,120 Speaker 2: I tried to watch it three times, like I had 1019 00:46:30,160 --> 00:46:31,120 Speaker 2: to restart three. 1020 00:46:30,920 --> 00:46:32,239 Speaker 4: Times because I couldn't get into it. 1021 00:46:32,360 --> 00:46:33,439 Speaker 3: I feel like Heather and. 1022 00:46:33,360 --> 00:46:37,360 Speaker 5: I, yeah, I'm gonna watch it. I'm gonna tell you, yeah. Yeah. 1023 00:46:37,520 --> 00:46:40,160 Speaker 1: I mean it's a it's an investment because it's like 1024 00:46:40,920 --> 00:46:42,239 Speaker 1: sixty something episodes. 1025 00:46:43,000 --> 00:46:44,759 Speaker 3: It's a lot, but like it's easy TV. 1026 00:46:44,960 --> 00:46:46,600 Speaker 1: So it's like you can watch it in the background 1027 00:46:46,760 --> 00:46:48,440 Speaker 1: and like you can go rush your teeth, you can 1028 00:46:48,440 --> 00:46:49,719 Speaker 1: put a fit. You don't have to be like you 1029 00:46:49,760 --> 00:46:50,920 Speaker 1: know what I mean, you have to pay ten so 1030 00:46:51,000 --> 00:46:56,400 Speaker 1: much attention. Yeah, it is amazing. Yeah, yeah, I love reality. 1031 00:46:57,719 --> 00:47:02,200 Speaker 5: I stopped watching Selling Sunset, not because of any reason, 1032 00:47:02,280 --> 00:47:04,200 Speaker 5: but I was like, I'm not on it anymore. But 1033 00:47:04,800 --> 00:47:06,520 Speaker 5: I love reality. I love the Kardashians. 1034 00:47:06,560 --> 00:47:09,520 Speaker 7: I do Wait, it was your favorite of the kardashianss 1035 00:47:09,520 --> 00:47:13,600 Speaker 7: Oh gosh, I say Chloe. Yeah, yeah, she's just like 1036 00:47:14,880 --> 00:47:17,359 Speaker 7: they're all like great, but I love what. 1037 00:47:17,360 --> 00:47:19,760 Speaker 5: Kind of mom she is. She just has good energy 1038 00:47:19,760 --> 00:47:20,480 Speaker 5: and good vibes. 1039 00:47:21,080 --> 00:47:24,600 Speaker 2: I was thinking, So, when was Selling Sunset your first 1040 00:47:24,640 --> 00:47:25,560 Speaker 2: time being on TV. 1041 00:47:26,120 --> 00:47:28,360 Speaker 5: Yeah. I had done modeling and I had done some acting, 1042 00:47:28,440 --> 00:47:30,520 Speaker 5: like had acting roles, but it was my first time 1043 00:47:30,640 --> 00:47:33,600 Speaker 5: doing reality. And I had no idea, like no idea 1044 00:47:33,680 --> 00:47:35,560 Speaker 5: what I was doing because I'm not like a calculated 1045 00:47:35,600 --> 00:47:37,839 Speaker 5: like a lot of reality stars. I feel like they're 1046 00:47:37,920 --> 00:47:41,800 Speaker 5: very calculated, and I was like, I'm not calculated person 1047 00:47:41,880 --> 00:47:43,759 Speaker 5: at all, and I just kind of went into it. 1048 00:47:43,800 --> 00:47:47,680 Speaker 5: I was just myself and it was Yeah, it was crazy. 1049 00:47:47,960 --> 00:47:50,800 Speaker 2: Was it hard or weird to watch herself on TV 1050 00:47:51,640 --> 00:47:53,879 Speaker 2: or I guess if you were in the acting world 1051 00:47:53,960 --> 00:47:55,719 Speaker 2: and modeling world, you re used to seeing your face. 1052 00:47:55,760 --> 00:47:58,080 Speaker 2: But but I was on The Bachelor like years ago, 1053 00:47:58,200 --> 00:48:01,799 Speaker 2: and I could bear watch the episodes that I was on. 1054 00:48:02,080 --> 00:48:04,040 Speaker 5: I think for me it was like a teaching moment 1055 00:48:04,120 --> 00:48:06,520 Speaker 5: because especially now with the flip off and the flipping 1056 00:48:06,520 --> 00:48:09,959 Speaker 5: al musas, It's like, I like to watch myself because 1057 00:48:09,960 --> 00:48:13,920 Speaker 5: I'm like, oh, I could have done better talking about 1058 00:48:14,000 --> 00:48:15,439 Speaker 5: what I was doing to the house, or I could 1059 00:48:15,440 --> 00:48:18,279 Speaker 5: have done better explaining to the audience, because you know, 1060 00:48:18,360 --> 00:48:22,480 Speaker 5: we're teaching. That's good that, Yeah, I need more of 1061 00:48:22,560 --> 00:48:28,040 Speaker 5: that because I'm like, I learned from myself, so I'm 1062 00:48:28,080 --> 00:48:30,160 Speaker 5: like I could do better, like I could be better. 1063 00:48:30,280 --> 00:48:33,080 Speaker 5: And so I like watching myself back because I know 1064 00:48:33,120 --> 00:48:36,000 Speaker 5: I can improve myself because I take it very serious. 1065 00:48:36,120 --> 00:48:39,520 Speaker 5: I love being on TV and I'm so grateful for 1066 00:48:39,560 --> 00:48:42,279 Speaker 5: the opportunity of that I've been given, and I love 1067 00:48:42,320 --> 00:48:45,520 Speaker 5: what I do. So I just I enjoy watching myself 1068 00:48:45,520 --> 00:48:47,480 Speaker 5: and I love seeing my husband and I film together. 1069 00:48:47,560 --> 00:48:50,439 Speaker 5: It's I think we make great TV. I really do, 1070 00:48:50,640 --> 00:48:52,959 Speaker 5: and it's not easy to do bring two different people 1071 00:48:53,000 --> 00:48:55,560 Speaker 5: together and make really good TV. And then you know, 1072 00:48:55,600 --> 00:48:58,759 Speaker 5: add Christina and like, we our show is so good 1073 00:48:58,760 --> 00:49:00,160 Speaker 5: and I'm so proud of it that I I was 1074 00:49:00,200 --> 00:49:03,520 Speaker 5: so excited to watch it selling Sunset. I wasn't a 1075 00:49:03,560 --> 00:49:05,799 Speaker 5: co producer. We don't really know what's going to be 1076 00:49:05,800 --> 00:49:08,120 Speaker 5: put out there. There was a lot of times that, 1077 00:49:10,000 --> 00:49:12,759 Speaker 5: you know, things happen. I'm like, h what happened like that? 1078 00:49:12,800 --> 00:49:16,239 Speaker 5: You know, So there's a lot that you don't have 1079 00:49:16,280 --> 00:49:19,000 Speaker 5: control of and it's very nerve wracking, where my show 1080 00:49:19,040 --> 00:49:20,080 Speaker 5: I have a lot more control. 1081 00:49:20,640 --> 00:49:21,600 Speaker 4: Yeah, that's a relief. 1082 00:49:21,680 --> 00:49:24,360 Speaker 2: Yeah, I imagine My last question for you. 1083 00:49:24,400 --> 00:49:25,800 Speaker 4: I don't know if you've seen the trend where. 1084 00:49:25,640 --> 00:49:28,360 Speaker 2: People like, like, what would you tell your younger self? 1085 00:49:28,520 --> 00:49:30,920 Speaker 5: Oh, what would you tell the coffee? 1086 00:49:31,239 --> 00:49:33,120 Speaker 2: Well, I mean that's the concept. Yeah, what would you 1087 00:49:33,160 --> 00:49:35,200 Speaker 2: tell sixteen year old Heather? 1088 00:49:36,480 --> 00:49:41,719 Speaker 5: I would probably tell her stop worrying so much and 1089 00:49:41,760 --> 00:49:42,960 Speaker 5: everything will come together. 1090 00:49:43,920 --> 00:49:44,800 Speaker 4: Were you a warrior? 1091 00:49:45,000 --> 00:49:48,360 Speaker 5: I'm a warrior. I still am. My dad's a worrier. Okay, yeah, 1092 00:49:48,400 --> 00:49:50,440 Speaker 5: I'm like I just am. I'm like a preparer. I'm 1093 00:49:50,480 --> 00:49:52,480 Speaker 5: a warrior. I'm you know, that's just who I am. 1094 00:49:52,520 --> 00:49:54,600 Speaker 4: Are you are you? Do you have siblings? I have 1095 00:49:54,640 --> 00:49:56,239 Speaker 4: a sister older, younger. 1096 00:49:56,040 --> 00:49:58,160 Speaker 5: Older, Okay, yeah we're very different. 1097 00:49:58,360 --> 00:50:02,560 Speaker 2: Yeah yeah second young is child you give older child. 1098 00:50:02,320 --> 00:50:06,280 Speaker 5: And yeah, I'm like, I'm like a mom mom. 1099 00:50:07,040 --> 00:50:09,719 Speaker 4: Yeah you've always been a mom before you even were mom. Yeah. 1100 00:50:09,840 --> 00:50:12,120 Speaker 5: I want to be like free and chill and like whatever. 1101 00:50:12,160 --> 00:50:13,080 Speaker 5: I'm just not that person. 1102 00:50:13,560 --> 00:50:14,040 Speaker 4: That's okay. 1103 00:50:14,120 --> 00:50:16,719 Speaker 5: I think acknowledges that I'm just not like I just 1104 00:50:16,840 --> 00:50:17,560 Speaker 5: I am who I am. 1105 00:50:17,840 --> 00:50:19,080 Speaker 3: I can't think acknowledging. 1106 00:50:19,160 --> 00:50:20,240 Speaker 4: That is the freedom. 1107 00:50:20,560 --> 00:50:21,920 Speaker 5: Yeah, for true I like that. 1108 00:50:22,080 --> 00:50:25,600 Speaker 2: Yeah, where can people follow you and see content and 1109 00:50:25,640 --> 00:50:26,720 Speaker 2: all the things that you're doing? 1110 00:50:27,120 --> 00:50:29,960 Speaker 5: Yes, okay, let me try to remember. So I'm for Instagram, 1111 00:50:30,040 --> 00:50:35,880 Speaker 5: I'm the Heather rail Musa. My TikTok is Heather rail Musa, 1112 00:50:36,239 --> 00:50:39,680 Speaker 5: Heather just Heather rail Musa, and then Heather I Essentials 1113 00:50:39,800 --> 00:50:42,319 Speaker 5: is Heather I Essentials, and then on TikTok it's Heather 1114 00:50:42,440 --> 00:50:43,680 Speaker 5: dot ray dot Essentials. 1115 00:50:44,080 --> 00:50:48,040 Speaker 4: Perfect. Thank you so much for coming in. Thank you 1116 00:50:48,160 --> 00:50:50,520 Speaker 4: so much opening up and being vulnerable. 1117 00:50:50,640 --> 00:50:52,560 Speaker 5: We so appreciate It's very fun. 1118 00:50:52,760 --> 00:50:53,040 Speaker 3: Thank you,