1 00:00:05,040 --> 00:00:07,800 Speaker 1: This is the new grounded routine. I get up, I 2 00:00:07,880 --> 00:00:10,360 Speaker 1: take my new meds. My therapist is finding me off 3 00:00:10,440 --> 00:00:12,520 Speaker 1: the climb of pin and adderall and onto a mood 4 00:00:12,520 --> 00:00:16,000 Speaker 1: stabilizer Deprica, and the idea is to have me being 5 00:00:16,079 --> 00:00:19,040 Speaker 1: less chemically tugged back and forth, get me leveled out. 6 00:00:19,440 --> 00:00:22,239 Speaker 1: But I'm always anxious during medication changes. They can have 7 00:00:22,320 --> 00:00:25,920 Speaker 1: unexpected side effects on my mood. Mostly I like this guy, 8 00:00:26,040 --> 00:00:30,200 Speaker 1: Dr Ferryman, but in our first session he mentioned by 9 00:00:30,240 --> 00:00:33,000 Speaker 1: polar disorder is a possible new diagnosis to explain my 10 00:00:33,040 --> 00:00:36,720 Speaker 1: impulsive behavior. I don't want to admit it, but that 11 00:00:36,800 --> 00:00:40,080 Speaker 1: really freaks me out. Coping with anxiety has been one thing, 12 00:00:40,120 --> 00:00:44,440 Speaker 1: but but bipolar is like bipolar is like a real 13 00:00:44,479 --> 00:00:48,879 Speaker 1: mental illness. Luckily, he isn't pushing anything. In our later sessions, 14 00:00:49,680 --> 00:00:53,080 Speaker 1: We're mostly talking and kneasing up on my meds, and 15 00:00:53,159 --> 00:00:55,480 Speaker 1: my parents seemed happy that things are working out with him, 16 00:00:55,520 --> 00:00:57,200 Speaker 1: so I'm able to turn my attention back to what 17 00:00:57,240 --> 00:01:00,680 Speaker 1: I want to do most here comes the break. This 18 00:01:00,760 --> 00:01:05,080 Speaker 1: week We've lined up our biggest artists yet, Bobby Sessions. 19 00:01:05,720 --> 00:01:09,319 Speaker 1: He's an artist bridge and activism and music. I know 20 00:01:09,400 --> 00:01:12,399 Speaker 1: it'll be a dope conversation. The interview is after school 21 00:01:12,400 --> 00:01:15,000 Speaker 1: in the book of t Audio Lab Studio and Marcos 22 00:01:15,080 --> 00:01:18,360 Speaker 1: joining Janelle are not there for the first time. After that, 23 00:01:18,760 --> 00:01:21,280 Speaker 1: we're recording the finale and that's a wrap on season one. 24 00:01:21,840 --> 00:01:26,040 Speaker 1: I've got bad news. Rob, the artist we had booked, 25 00:01:26,040 --> 00:01:28,360 Speaker 1: had to cancel on episode ten. He was in an 26 00:01:28,319 --> 00:01:30,760 Speaker 1: altercation with the police and got detained. We don't have 27 00:01:30,800 --> 00:01:33,880 Speaker 1: an artist book for a season finale. What happened was 28 00:01:33,920 --> 00:01:35,640 Speaker 1: he pulled over by the clop flaw driving. Was he 29 00:01:35,640 --> 00:01:39,399 Speaker 1: at a protest? His manager didn't say. When I saw 30 00:01:39,440 --> 00:01:40,920 Speaker 1: he was at the same burger police as the man 31 00:01:40,959 --> 00:01:43,840 Speaker 1: who was unfortunately shot and killed last week. You may 32 00:01:43,880 --> 00:01:45,520 Speaker 1: have got caught up in all of that because the 33 00:01:45,520 --> 00:01:48,000 Speaker 1: police went on a spree arresting witnesses who recorded the 34 00:01:48,000 --> 00:01:50,880 Speaker 1: shooting on their cellphones. He was right behind the guy 35 00:01:50,880 --> 00:01:52,800 Speaker 1: who was killed by the police. I mean, it could 36 00:01:52,840 --> 00:01:56,440 Speaker 1: be anything, Damn, that's crazy. That's why I'm thankful for 37 00:01:56,440 --> 00:01:59,240 Speaker 1: this pot. This is about more than music. It gives 38 00:01:59,320 --> 00:02:01,000 Speaker 1: us in the artists of voice to talk about real 39 00:02:01,040 --> 00:02:04,040 Speaker 1: ship that matters. I know, right, I mean, there's a 40 00:02:04,160 --> 00:02:07,680 Speaker 1: reckoning happening right now in America. Monkster generation. We need 41 00:02:07,760 --> 00:02:11,359 Speaker 1: justice for Brianna Taylor, Tony McDade, Atiana Jefferson, a Maud 42 00:02:11,440 --> 00:02:15,920 Speaker 1: Aubrey like yesterday, all those black lives brutally taken, prematurely 43 00:02:16,120 --> 00:02:18,359 Speaker 1: named and unnamed. Oh, I mean, and don't even get 44 00:02:18,360 --> 00:02:20,520 Speaker 1: me started grouping. I mean, you know I'm going to 45 00:02:20,520 --> 00:02:23,480 Speaker 1: a BLM rally and Brooklyn next week. You should join me. 46 00:02:23,880 --> 00:02:25,760 Speaker 1: I start to get anxious when Jane s to just 47 00:02:25,880 --> 00:02:28,360 Speaker 1: going through a protest. It hasn't really been my scene, 48 00:02:28,360 --> 00:02:30,400 Speaker 1: to be honest, I meant what I said about the 49 00:02:30,400 --> 00:02:33,480 Speaker 1: podcast being a vehicle to talk about issues, and that's 50 00:02:33,520 --> 00:02:36,720 Speaker 1: where I want to focus my energy. Crowds, chants, and 51 00:02:37,520 --> 00:02:40,040 Speaker 1: cops really are my thing. I'll just tell her that 52 00:02:40,080 --> 00:02:41,520 Speaker 1: I'm going to stay in the lab to focus on 53 00:02:41,520 --> 00:02:45,600 Speaker 1: our pop one thing at a time. I've got to 54 00:02:45,600 --> 00:02:48,200 Speaker 1: get out of my ground. And first, and you said 55 00:02:48,240 --> 00:02:50,440 Speaker 1: we're out of final artist interview, we for sure you 56 00:02:50,480 --> 00:02:52,280 Speaker 1: need to solve that before making any other plans for 57 00:02:52,360 --> 00:02:55,560 Speaker 1: next week. I mean, okay, fair enough, you got any 58 00:02:55,600 --> 00:02:59,440 Speaker 1: fresh ideas? What if we feature a true indie artist, 59 00:03:00,680 --> 00:03:03,440 Speaker 1: someone on the East Coast who is a poet and 60 00:03:03,919 --> 00:03:06,799 Speaker 1: mc a truth secret Ruben I can see the stars 61 00:03:06,800 --> 00:03:09,120 Speaker 1: in your eyes. My g who do you ever mind? 62 00:03:09,440 --> 00:03:13,200 Speaker 1: You gotta lead already, you already know. So when I 63 00:03:13,240 --> 00:03:15,680 Speaker 1: was at the villa, hung out with the Rabbit from Boston, 64 00:03:16,760 --> 00:03:18,720 Speaker 1: we follow each other on the ground. Now I could 65 00:03:18,720 --> 00:03:21,360 Speaker 1: reach out to her. All right, we're on a tight deadline. 66 00:03:21,360 --> 00:03:24,679 Speaker 1: It's worth a shot. Let's hit put up. Maybe focusing 67 00:03:24,720 --> 00:03:27,480 Speaker 1: so much on the pod, which is technically a school project, 68 00:03:27,480 --> 00:03:29,519 Speaker 1: will convince your parents that you're stepping up your game. 69 00:03:29,760 --> 00:03:32,480 Speaker 1: You're serious about your academics, and you're done wilding out 70 00:03:32,520 --> 00:03:34,800 Speaker 1: in l A. And if you ask me, maybe a 71 00:03:34,800 --> 00:03:37,440 Speaker 1: little you join me at the protest. She flashes me 72 00:03:37,480 --> 00:03:41,600 Speaker 1: a daring smile. This girl doesn't miss a beat. I 73 00:03:41,600 --> 00:03:43,160 Speaker 1: feel an echo of the crush I had on them 74 00:03:43,160 --> 00:03:46,200 Speaker 1: when we first met, but I'm past it now. Janelle 75 00:03:46,200 --> 00:03:48,960 Speaker 1: has been my rock during all this drama cost even 76 00:03:48,960 --> 00:03:51,720 Speaker 1: when she's been pissed in me too. She's a good friend. 77 00:03:52,400 --> 00:03:55,480 Speaker 1: That's actually not a bad idea, you know, if I 78 00:03:55,520 --> 00:03:58,360 Speaker 1: can get out of my grounding, I promised to join you. 79 00:03:59,000 --> 00:04:22,839 Speaker 1: That's what I'm talking of about. The rest of the 80 00:04:22,880 --> 00:04:25,200 Speaker 1: day is a blur. The whole time my mind is 81 00:04:25,240 --> 00:04:27,880 Speaker 1: on the Bobby Sessions interview coming up after school. I'm 82 00:04:27,920 --> 00:04:30,039 Speaker 1: looking forward to Marco seeing the new audio lab set 83 00:04:30,080 --> 00:04:32,880 Speaker 1: up too. After a month on the outs, now that 84 00:04:32,880 --> 00:04:34,960 Speaker 1: he's back in the phone market, can see just how 85 00:04:35,040 --> 00:04:38,960 Speaker 1: much Janelle and I have leveled up our production. That's Marque, 86 00:04:39,760 --> 00:04:41,919 Speaker 1: my last classic study hall, where I've been listening to 87 00:04:41,920 --> 00:04:45,039 Speaker 1: the Bobby's music and prepping my interview questions. With the 88 00:04:45,120 --> 00:04:47,320 Speaker 1: ring of the bell, I crammed my phone in notebooks 89 00:04:47,320 --> 00:04:49,440 Speaker 1: in my bag and book it across the campus to 90 00:04:49,480 --> 00:04:53,159 Speaker 1: meet Janelle at the lab. As I get close, I 91 00:04:53,160 --> 00:04:55,800 Speaker 1: see Janelle is already in there waiting for me, and 92 00:04:55,839 --> 00:04:57,960 Speaker 1: I also catch eyes on Marco. We're walking down the hole. 93 00:04:58,880 --> 00:05:01,840 Speaker 1: He got here pretty damn past. But then again, our 94 00:05:01,839 --> 00:05:03,760 Speaker 1: old public school gets out a little earlier than Book 95 00:05:03,760 --> 00:05:07,560 Speaker 1: of t so he had a head start. Marco this way. 96 00:05:07,760 --> 00:05:09,719 Speaker 1: He salutes from across the hall and hustle to catch 97 00:05:09,800 --> 00:05:12,200 Speaker 1: up with me. We entered the lab together and Janelle 98 00:05:12,200 --> 00:05:15,200 Speaker 1: waves us a bright hello. Damn, you really do have 99 00:05:15,240 --> 00:05:19,000 Speaker 1: a sweet spot up here. Tech school has its benefits, Hey, Marco, 100 00:05:19,279 --> 00:05:21,520 Speaker 1: welcome to here comes the break two point. Oh, I 101 00:05:21,560 --> 00:05:24,280 Speaker 1: told you this was an upgrade your boogie school has 102 00:05:24,279 --> 00:05:26,719 Speaker 1: its perks. After all. When he looks at me, I 103 00:05:26,720 --> 00:05:29,320 Speaker 1: can see the Marco was still a bit uptight. He 104 00:05:29,440 --> 00:05:33,360 Speaker 1: still hurt, but he's trying. This dude doesn't wear selling 105 00:05:33,440 --> 00:05:36,760 Speaker 1: or salty that well. My brain is full of racing thoughts, 106 00:05:37,080 --> 00:05:39,080 Speaker 1: but I know the only way to heal our relationship 107 00:05:39,120 --> 00:05:42,360 Speaker 1: the rest of the way. It's time before I can 108 00:05:42,400 --> 00:05:45,200 Speaker 1: say anything too soft and screw up di vide. Janelle 109 00:05:45,240 --> 00:05:47,679 Speaker 1: chimes in, so we have a few minutes before Bobby 110 00:05:47,720 --> 00:05:49,840 Speaker 1: calls in. I figured we could just review some products 111 00:05:49,839 --> 00:05:52,360 Speaker 1: stuff Marco, I told her been earlier, but you should 112 00:05:52,400 --> 00:05:54,680 Speaker 1: know we're out our final artists for next week. We 113 00:05:54,760 --> 00:05:57,880 Speaker 1: have to feel that slot pretty quick. What that sucks, 114 00:05:58,120 --> 00:06:02,200 Speaker 1: don't worry. I gotta leave Boston based rapping or poet 115 00:06:02,279 --> 00:06:04,600 Speaker 1: named up. Well, we shouldn't rely on just one lead. 116 00:06:04,920 --> 00:06:07,000 Speaker 1: I'll review what other artist context we've got that we 117 00:06:07,040 --> 00:06:09,120 Speaker 1: haven't used, and maybe put out feel us for a 118 00:06:09,120 --> 00:06:12,400 Speaker 1: couple more good idea. Where did this lead come from? Anyway? 119 00:06:12,560 --> 00:06:16,560 Speaker 1: I met her at the villa. We mutual follows one 120 00:06:16,680 --> 00:06:18,839 Speaker 1: mention of the villa, and for once, Marco doesn't have 121 00:06:18,839 --> 00:06:23,200 Speaker 1: a smart comeback. Yep, he's still heard it in the 122 00:06:23,240 --> 00:06:26,520 Speaker 1: awkward silence that follows. It's Janelle who eases the tension 123 00:06:26,560 --> 00:06:29,960 Speaker 1: between us again. I also finished betting the ads sponsors 124 00:06:29,960 --> 00:06:32,760 Speaker 1: who have been courting us, sending us merchant all that. Marco, 125 00:06:32,880 --> 00:06:34,800 Speaker 1: we didn't want to move forward with anything until we're 126 00:06:34,839 --> 00:06:37,440 Speaker 1: all back together, so I've just been researching them until 127 00:06:37,480 --> 00:06:41,600 Speaker 1: you got back. So who are we going with revenue streams? Baby? 128 00:06:41,680 --> 00:06:44,360 Speaker 1: Let's get this paper. Actually, I think we dodged a 129 00:06:44,360 --> 00:06:47,640 Speaker 1: bullet waiting. None of the sponsors who reached out to 130 00:06:47,680 --> 00:06:51,520 Speaker 1: us are particularly environmentally or socially conscious. I just think 131 00:06:51,560 --> 00:06:53,960 Speaker 1: whatever brands we agree to work with, we really need 132 00:06:54,000 --> 00:06:56,840 Speaker 1: to make sure they reflect our values. Maybe we con 133 00:06:56,880 --> 00:06:59,680 Speaker 1: solicit ads from places that have holistic missions that they 134 00:06:59,720 --> 00:07:02,440 Speaker 1: true we uphold. I have faith will find the right 135 00:07:02,480 --> 00:07:05,440 Speaker 1: company to sponsor. Here comes the break. Until then, I 136 00:07:05,480 --> 00:07:09,000 Speaker 1: think we should go at free and the awkward silence 137 00:07:09,080 --> 00:07:12,560 Speaker 1: comes right back. I can tell Marco is not feeling 138 00:07:12,560 --> 00:07:14,360 Speaker 1: the idea of turning down money now that we're big 139 00:07:14,480 --> 00:07:17,640 Speaker 1: enough to monetize off of our brand. To be honest, 140 00:07:18,360 --> 00:07:21,280 Speaker 1: I don't really disagree with him. Janelle really caught us 141 00:07:21,280 --> 00:07:24,120 Speaker 1: soft guard with this one. Girl, Are you crazy? We're 142 00:07:24,160 --> 00:07:26,120 Speaker 1: at the level where we have sponsors hitting us up. 143 00:07:26,640 --> 00:07:28,160 Speaker 1: We can make some bread off this, so we're not 144 00:07:28,240 --> 00:07:31,320 Speaker 1: summer camp counselors or back in groceries this summer. I mean, 145 00:07:31,640 --> 00:07:33,320 Speaker 1: I'm not above it, but if we can make money 146 00:07:33,360 --> 00:07:36,400 Speaker 1: off our social media presence, that's that's huge. I'm with 147 00:07:36,520 --> 00:07:38,920 Speaker 1: Marco on this one, Jay, I mean, I appreciate you 148 00:07:39,000 --> 00:07:41,360 Speaker 1: vetting on the candidates like you did, but maybe he 149 00:07:41,400 --> 00:07:42,880 Speaker 1: and I should take a look at the list too, 150 00:07:43,000 --> 00:07:44,440 Speaker 1: and we could pick a few you might be willing 151 00:07:44,480 --> 00:07:47,000 Speaker 1: to consider. I can see Janelle get a little frustrated 152 00:07:47,040 --> 00:07:49,600 Speaker 1: behind their eyes. It occurs to me that this is 153 00:07:49,640 --> 00:07:51,840 Speaker 1: the first time Marco and I really pushed back against 154 00:07:51,840 --> 00:07:54,040 Speaker 1: their input. I mean, if you guys want to take 155 00:07:54,040 --> 00:07:56,600 Speaker 1: on the extra work, feel free to review the list yourselves. 156 00:07:56,840 --> 00:07:59,600 Speaker 1: I'm just saying we're about to sit down for an 157 00:07:59,600 --> 00:08:03,880 Speaker 1: interview with an artivists, activists slash artists. We've asked artists 158 00:08:03,880 --> 00:08:07,200 Speaker 1: about their social consciousness and global consciousness just as much 159 00:08:07,200 --> 00:08:09,440 Speaker 1: as we've asked about the music. We don't want to 160 00:08:09,480 --> 00:08:12,400 Speaker 1: abandon those values and that perspective. I hear you, I 161 00:08:12,520 --> 00:08:14,680 Speaker 1: hear you, But you know what else I hear wu 162 00:08:14,800 --> 00:08:19,160 Speaker 1: Tang Cream cash rules everything around. He get the money, 163 00:08:19,480 --> 00:08:23,720 Speaker 1: didid bill? Yah? Yeah, man, that's my dude. Woo tang 164 00:08:23,720 --> 00:08:26,560 Speaker 1: Woo tang jy. I'm just trying to lighten the move 165 00:08:26,600 --> 00:08:28,840 Speaker 1: a bit now. I know you're into vibrating higher and 166 00:08:28,920 --> 00:08:32,480 Speaker 1: singing bowls, but making a little cash whon't hurt if 167 00:08:32,520 --> 00:08:34,520 Speaker 1: we want to scale up more. The next step is 168 00:08:34,559 --> 00:08:38,240 Speaker 1: getting an operating budget, and that means AD dollars. This 169 00:08:38,280 --> 00:08:41,000 Speaker 1: is the big break we've been waiting for. Fidgets in 170 00:08:41,080 --> 00:08:44,400 Speaker 1: the seat. We're all dancing around the disagreement and being 171 00:08:44,400 --> 00:08:46,559 Speaker 1: professional about it, but it feels a little strange to 172 00:08:46,640 --> 00:08:49,839 Speaker 1: find Marco on myself united against it. We're over here 173 00:08:49,880 --> 00:08:52,640 Speaker 1: singing it Wu Tang duet. We've experienced a lot of 174 00:08:52,640 --> 00:08:55,160 Speaker 1: different dynamics as a team in the short, wild history 175 00:08:55,200 --> 00:08:58,760 Speaker 1: of this project, but somehow not this one. I understand that, 176 00:08:58,960 --> 00:09:01,240 Speaker 1: And to be fair, I know this pod started out 177 00:09:01,240 --> 00:09:03,640 Speaker 1: between the two of you. I'm not trying to come 178 00:09:03,640 --> 00:09:07,080 Speaker 1: between your romance or the vision of the pod. However, 179 00:09:08,160 --> 00:09:10,360 Speaker 1: I don't want us to lose sight of our principles. 180 00:09:10,679 --> 00:09:15,920 Speaker 1: In Layman's terms, more money, more problems. Fair enough, Marco 181 00:09:15,960 --> 00:09:17,320 Speaker 1: and I will look at the list this week and 182 00:09:17,360 --> 00:09:20,160 Speaker 1: we'll return to this convote in a few days. You 183 00:09:20,200 --> 00:09:22,360 Speaker 1: good with that? It works for me, we'll see. Just 184 00:09:22,640 --> 00:09:24,800 Speaker 1: let me know. It feels great for me and Marco 185 00:09:24,840 --> 00:09:28,040 Speaker 1: to be working together as a team again. Janelle may 186 00:09:28,040 --> 00:09:30,520 Speaker 1: not be feeling us right now, but we gotta keep 187 00:09:30,520 --> 00:09:32,760 Speaker 1: our eyes on the prize. All right, You ready to 188 00:09:32,760 --> 00:09:35,600 Speaker 1: lock down this interview, Let's get to work. Bobby Sessions 189 00:09:35,679 --> 00:09:44,319 Speaker 1: is calling in and Janelle turns on the mic. In 190 00:09:44,440 --> 00:09:47,679 Speaker 1: my research, I've noticed activism seems to be the fabric 191 00:09:47,720 --> 00:09:49,920 Speaker 1: of who you are. Have Have you been able to 192 00:09:49,960 --> 00:09:52,000 Speaker 1: remain authentic and truth to who you are by being 193 00:09:52,040 --> 00:09:55,120 Speaker 1: signed to a major record label. I feel like when 194 00:09:55,400 --> 00:09:58,240 Speaker 1: you are blessed with the opportunity to be signed to 195 00:09:59,240 --> 00:10:03,320 Speaker 1: a company death Jam or something of that level, there's 196 00:10:03,320 --> 00:10:06,200 Speaker 1: a lot of responsibility that comes with that platform. And 197 00:10:06,240 --> 00:10:09,280 Speaker 1: it's not for every artist. But if I feel like 198 00:10:09,320 --> 00:10:13,960 Speaker 1: if artists has the ability to report what's going on 199 00:10:14,080 --> 00:10:15,439 Speaker 1: and put it in a way where it can be 200 00:10:15,600 --> 00:10:18,319 Speaker 1: entertaining with the music, then by all means they should 201 00:10:18,520 --> 00:10:23,200 Speaker 1: use their gifts. Why would you processing all of the 202 00:10:23,200 --> 00:10:26,320 Speaker 1: the reckon with systemic racism going on right now? That's 203 00:10:26,320 --> 00:10:30,199 Speaker 1: a difficult thing. To process because even post the murder 204 00:10:30,320 --> 00:10:33,120 Speaker 1: George Floyd, that's been a number of other people that 205 00:10:33,240 --> 00:10:37,360 Speaker 1: have been executed, has been murdered prior to George Floyd 206 00:10:37,440 --> 00:10:40,480 Speaker 1: that are getting more like now, and it's almost difficult 207 00:10:40,520 --> 00:10:43,000 Speaker 1: to keep up with all the names because there's so many. 208 00:10:43,559 --> 00:10:46,720 Speaker 1: So it's difficult to process. But I try to stay 209 00:10:46,720 --> 00:10:50,680 Speaker 1: informed and then also balanced that out by just taking 210 00:10:50,720 --> 00:10:54,320 Speaker 1: breaks from my own sanity. Yeah, I feel that. I 211 00:10:54,320 --> 00:10:58,120 Speaker 1: feel that. I also read that unfortunately, your cousin, James 212 00:10:58,120 --> 00:11:00,600 Speaker 1: Harper was shotting killed by Dallas cops, said free years ago. 213 00:11:00,640 --> 00:11:07,840 Speaker 1: So yeah, it's disheartening. You become noumb twit when you 214 00:11:07,840 --> 00:11:12,160 Speaker 1: have a family member that experiences that. And in my case, 215 00:11:12,280 --> 00:11:17,120 Speaker 1: I found out a combination from Twitter and my mother 216 00:11:17,320 --> 00:11:20,360 Speaker 1: when my cousin passed. I was working at Walmart at 217 00:11:20,360 --> 00:11:24,120 Speaker 1: the time, and during my break, I was on Twitter 218 00:11:24,320 --> 00:11:26,319 Speaker 1: and I saw that he was calling it a riot. 219 00:11:26,360 --> 00:11:29,280 Speaker 1: But there's a bunch of people that were upset and 220 00:11:29,400 --> 00:11:32,960 Speaker 1: uh in South Dallas and saying that someone had been 221 00:11:33,520 --> 00:11:35,280 Speaker 1: shot by the cops. But you did you hear this 222 00:11:35,320 --> 00:11:40,040 Speaker 1: every day? So it wasn't You're almost desensitized. And I 223 00:11:40,040 --> 00:11:42,720 Speaker 1: remember hearing about that Damn, that's crazy. This happened in Dallas. 224 00:11:43,000 --> 00:11:45,720 Speaker 1: Then my break was finished, and then I get a 225 00:11:45,760 --> 00:11:49,840 Speaker 1: text from my mom, which at that time she wasn't 226 00:11:50,000 --> 00:11:52,080 Speaker 1: really texting. So when she was like, y'all need you 227 00:11:52,120 --> 00:11:55,439 Speaker 1: to call me, I knew something was wrong immediately because 228 00:11:55,440 --> 00:11:57,720 Speaker 1: that just wasn't the way that she chose to communicate 229 00:11:58,040 --> 00:12:01,080 Speaker 1: during that time. So I stepped into a bathroom and 230 00:12:01,120 --> 00:12:03,640 Speaker 1: I called her, and then she told me that my 231 00:12:03,720 --> 00:12:08,040 Speaker 1: cousin got killed. Like I started connecting back from what 232 00:12:08,200 --> 00:12:10,400 Speaker 1: I was seeing on Twitter some hours before, and then 233 00:12:10,440 --> 00:12:13,520 Speaker 1: like I connected the dots, like uh, but there was 234 00:12:13,520 --> 00:12:18,040 Speaker 1: a life changing event because you see these things all 235 00:12:18,040 --> 00:12:22,199 Speaker 1: the time, and even if you're not consciously thinking about it, 236 00:12:22,400 --> 00:12:26,640 Speaker 1: somewhere in your mind you maybe thinking that won't happen 237 00:12:26,720 --> 00:12:30,040 Speaker 1: to you or someone by around you. And then that 238 00:12:30,160 --> 00:12:32,600 Speaker 1: was that wake up called like oh wow, this isn't 239 00:12:32,760 --> 00:12:35,920 Speaker 1: something on Twitter anymore, something on TV. This is like 240 00:12:37,280 --> 00:12:40,640 Speaker 1: this hit our front door. So it's crazy seeing other 241 00:12:40,760 --> 00:12:44,600 Speaker 1: families now have to deal with a similar thing. It's 242 00:12:44,600 --> 00:12:48,640 Speaker 1: a sad thing, but I am encouraged by all the 243 00:12:49,480 --> 00:12:52,800 Speaker 1: I haven't seen as much unity from us as a people, 244 00:12:52,960 --> 00:12:55,480 Speaker 1: and even wait for some of the non black people 245 00:12:55,480 --> 00:12:59,000 Speaker 1: that are still that are just supporting and coming together 246 00:12:59,679 --> 00:13:02,640 Speaker 1: to put an into this. I haven't seen as much unity. 247 00:13:02,679 --> 00:13:06,319 Speaker 1: I haven't seen as much collective pushback in my lifetime, 248 00:13:06,559 --> 00:13:10,920 Speaker 1: so that part has me excited for the future. Most 249 00:13:10,920 --> 00:13:12,720 Speaker 1: respect to you man, Thank you for discussing that you 250 00:13:12,720 --> 00:13:15,960 Speaker 1: didn't have to do so I appreciate it. Sort of First, 251 00:13:16,280 --> 00:13:20,760 Speaker 1: I felt a lot of beautiful things are developed in 252 00:13:22,000 --> 00:13:26,920 Speaker 1: dirty places and dark places. So, for example, as bad 253 00:13:27,000 --> 00:13:31,079 Speaker 1: as things are on an economic level, on a literally 254 00:13:31,360 --> 00:13:34,880 Speaker 1: black people getting killed for no reason level, there is 255 00:13:34,920 --> 00:13:38,440 Speaker 1: a positive side to it. And as far as the 256 00:13:38,480 --> 00:13:41,320 Speaker 1: future going forward, I believe that's gonna be so much 257 00:13:41,360 --> 00:13:44,760 Speaker 1: more accountability across the board, as far as how we're police, 258 00:13:45,160 --> 00:13:51,119 Speaker 1: how money is being distributed into our communities. M hm, okay, okay. 259 00:13:51,600 --> 00:13:54,120 Speaker 1: Something back to music a little bit. Uh, Have you 260 00:13:54,200 --> 00:13:56,600 Speaker 1: met or collaborated with an artist that you're just like, 261 00:13:56,840 --> 00:13:58,680 Speaker 1: I can't believe me. I'm in the room with this person. 262 00:13:59,440 --> 00:14:02,000 Speaker 1: If you have, how was that experience, I would saying no, 263 00:14:03,080 --> 00:14:07,280 Speaker 1: not at least not yet, mainly because not even on 264 00:14:07,320 --> 00:14:09,600 Speaker 1: a cocky ship. It's just I expect to be in 265 00:14:09,640 --> 00:14:13,120 Speaker 1: those rooms. I can't believe it. When I'm in there, 266 00:14:13,520 --> 00:14:15,840 Speaker 1: I believe it, you know what I mean, Like, I'm 267 00:14:15,880 --> 00:14:19,680 Speaker 1: excited every time. Still, like, man, this is crazy. The 268 00:14:19,840 --> 00:14:23,000 Speaker 1: unbelievable part that for me is more man, there's a 269 00:14:23,000 --> 00:14:25,960 Speaker 1: lot of attraction stuff was really working everything. That's the 270 00:14:26,040 --> 00:14:30,280 Speaker 1: part that gets me feeling a way. I believe I'm dope, 271 00:14:30,400 --> 00:14:32,600 Speaker 1: so I expect to be in wrongs with dope people. 272 00:14:33,080 --> 00:14:35,560 Speaker 1: So so you're inspired by the seecret did not have 273 00:14:35,560 --> 00:14:38,160 Speaker 1: attraction and let this manifest station in. Like to you, 274 00:14:38,440 --> 00:14:40,960 Speaker 1: I'm real big on writing yourself down, like you mentioned, 275 00:14:41,000 --> 00:14:43,680 Speaker 1: I think for the main purpose of not just writing 276 00:14:43,760 --> 00:14:45,840 Speaker 1: something down. But so for example, when I write down 277 00:14:45,880 --> 00:14:47,320 Speaker 1: the goal, I put it on a big piece of 278 00:14:47,320 --> 00:14:50,600 Speaker 1: construction paper and I hang them in different areas of 279 00:14:50,720 --> 00:14:53,800 Speaker 1: my place. So like pretty much no matter where I'm at, 280 00:14:54,520 --> 00:14:59,840 Speaker 1: I see this goal like constantly, And it's not necessarily 281 00:14:59,840 --> 00:15:04,200 Speaker 1: for my conscious minds. It's really for my subconscious money. 282 00:15:04,640 --> 00:15:08,720 Speaker 1: So there's times that I'm taking it in and absorbing 283 00:15:08,920 --> 00:15:13,160 Speaker 1: what I have on this board without even consciously noticing it. 284 00:15:13,840 --> 00:15:16,480 Speaker 1: And I'm doing this to program my subconscious mind. So 285 00:15:16,800 --> 00:15:21,280 Speaker 1: whatever future I make all of my future realities of 286 00:15:21,400 --> 00:15:26,320 Speaker 1: present fact this and as a late instead of me 287 00:15:26,440 --> 00:15:28,440 Speaker 1: just putting down Okay, I want to make this much money. 288 00:15:28,440 --> 00:15:30,200 Speaker 1: I want to have a relationship with this person. I 289 00:15:30,280 --> 00:15:34,160 Speaker 1: do it more like material things that have fallen off 290 00:15:34,600 --> 00:15:37,400 Speaker 1: the list and has become more about just I just 291 00:15:37,480 --> 00:15:39,920 Speaker 1: want to be creative. I want to wake up and 292 00:15:39,960 --> 00:15:44,600 Speaker 1: feel abundantly creative. I have this endless will of creativity 293 00:15:45,000 --> 00:15:47,720 Speaker 1: that I can draw from whenever I want, for however 294 00:15:47,840 --> 00:15:51,640 Speaker 1: long I want, at any time, anywhere, And then that 295 00:15:51,840 --> 00:15:55,520 Speaker 1: has resulted in a lot of manifestations just because I'm 296 00:15:55,560 --> 00:15:58,600 Speaker 1: focusing more on the ability to fish as opposed to 297 00:15:58,640 --> 00:16:01,440 Speaker 1: the fish itself and fish in this example, is the 298 00:16:01,560 --> 00:16:05,920 Speaker 1: material thing like a car or a watch or money 299 00:16:06,080 --> 00:16:09,120 Speaker 1: that's a fish. I am thinking of manifests being better 300 00:16:09,160 --> 00:16:13,960 Speaker 1: at fishing. Do you have advice for young creators and 301 00:16:13,960 --> 00:16:15,960 Speaker 1: their parents trying to learn how to fish? People have 302 00:16:16,520 --> 00:16:21,120 Speaker 1: time goals that they set for themselves. I should have 303 00:16:21,520 --> 00:16:23,720 Speaker 1: this much money or be at this stage in my 304 00:16:23,840 --> 00:16:27,720 Speaker 1: career at this time. We do that. When you're eighteen, 305 00:16:27,760 --> 00:16:30,840 Speaker 1: you're like, I need to own a business at twenty three. 306 00:16:31,880 --> 00:16:34,880 Speaker 1: So you turn twenty three, you don't own a business, 307 00:16:35,120 --> 00:16:37,280 Speaker 1: and now you're discouraged, and now you want to quit 308 00:16:37,360 --> 00:16:39,040 Speaker 1: when if you would have just kept going, you would 309 00:16:39,040 --> 00:16:43,040 Speaker 1: have owned it at and by the time you're twenty 310 00:16:43,080 --> 00:16:44,640 Speaker 1: eight and you own it, you wouldn't look at it 311 00:16:44,720 --> 00:16:50,400 Speaker 1: like too old man. So a lot of struggles and 312 00:16:50,720 --> 00:16:56,000 Speaker 1: anxiety and depression and self doubt and second guessing. A 313 00:16:56,000 --> 00:16:58,880 Speaker 1: lot of that is attached to time, and your parents 314 00:16:59,280 --> 00:17:02,640 Speaker 1: have time expectations on you as well, because that's how 315 00:17:02,680 --> 00:17:06,560 Speaker 1: they evaluate their apparently. So if your kid is twenty 316 00:17:06,560 --> 00:17:09,560 Speaker 1: four and they need to live with you and they're struggling, 317 00:17:09,640 --> 00:17:11,960 Speaker 1: you're like, oh, man, like what when is this gonna 318 00:17:12,000 --> 00:17:14,800 Speaker 1: turn out? Your little hobby and they're trying to protect 319 00:17:14,800 --> 00:17:17,240 Speaker 1: you at the end of the day, that's their intention. 320 00:17:17,400 --> 00:17:19,240 Speaker 1: It comes off wrong because they're like, oh, y'all a 321 00:17:19,280 --> 00:17:21,600 Speaker 1: ship on my dreams and all that. But it's not 322 00:17:21,760 --> 00:17:26,920 Speaker 1: for it's not for your parents to understand. H It's 323 00:17:26,920 --> 00:17:29,240 Speaker 1: not for them too. It's a difficult thing for you 324 00:17:29,320 --> 00:17:31,880 Speaker 1: as the creative to accept, but it's not for them 325 00:17:31,920 --> 00:17:34,480 Speaker 1: to accept. When I first started rapping and I wanted 326 00:17:34,520 --> 00:17:37,840 Speaker 1: everybody to jump on the Boby Sessions bandwaggon and they 327 00:17:37,960 --> 00:17:40,280 Speaker 1: was like, oh, this is I'll be what ibb this 328 00:17:40,359 --> 00:17:43,239 Speaker 1: is my dream? This is my life goal, it's my 329 00:17:43,320 --> 00:17:46,080 Speaker 1: life purpose. But that's not for them. They're not in 330 00:17:46,119 --> 00:17:48,080 Speaker 1: my head, so they can't see the future that I 331 00:17:48,160 --> 00:17:50,960 Speaker 1: have for myself. And then I learned a very valuable 332 00:17:51,040 --> 00:17:53,800 Speaker 1: lesson and some of my my mother told me, and 333 00:17:54,480 --> 00:17:57,679 Speaker 1: I'd never forgotten it. She told me my mom end 334 00:17:57,760 --> 00:17:59,879 Speaker 1: up being or both my parents end up being cute 335 00:18:00,000 --> 00:18:02,720 Speaker 1: supporters of my music down the line, but in the 336 00:18:02,760 --> 00:18:05,320 Speaker 1: beginning it wasn't, and my mom said I couldn't support 337 00:18:05,320 --> 00:18:09,919 Speaker 1: it because I didn't believe it, and that changed my life. 338 00:18:10,080 --> 00:18:12,239 Speaker 1: Wouldn't view that as an insult. I view that as 339 00:18:12,320 --> 00:18:16,280 Speaker 1: you know what I'm wrong, You're right, because you shouldn't. 340 00:18:16,600 --> 00:18:20,639 Speaker 1: You don't owe me support because you're my parents. Any 341 00:18:20,960 --> 00:18:23,880 Speaker 1: child that's expecting their parents to do that, I wouldn't 342 00:18:23,880 --> 00:18:27,000 Speaker 1: do it. I would highly recommend not doing that. You 343 00:18:27,040 --> 00:18:29,080 Speaker 1: need to be you need to be on your path, 344 00:18:29,200 --> 00:18:31,879 Speaker 1: and you need to be okay with your parents judging 345 00:18:31,920 --> 00:18:33,840 Speaker 1: you because that's what they're supposed to do, because at 346 00:18:33,840 --> 00:18:35,080 Speaker 1: the end of the day, they don't want you to 347 00:18:35,119 --> 00:18:37,760 Speaker 1: be homeless. Now you believe in yourself and or you 348 00:18:37,840 --> 00:18:40,919 Speaker 1: believe that you're gonna be successful, you need to depend 349 00:18:40,960 --> 00:18:44,520 Speaker 1: on that and no external validation from anyone else. And 350 00:18:44,600 --> 00:18:46,119 Speaker 1: what are they say? If you want it enough, you're 351 00:18:46,119 --> 00:18:49,840 Speaker 1: gonna find out a way to go get it. We'll 352 00:18:49,840 --> 00:19:04,520 Speaker 1: be right back and now back to the show. I'm 353 00:19:04,560 --> 00:19:08,080 Speaker 1: bugging out after that interview. We all are. It was 354 00:19:08,119 --> 00:19:10,919 Speaker 1: one of our best yet. The tension over whether we 355 00:19:10,960 --> 00:19:13,720 Speaker 1: signed sponsors for the pod is completely forgotten among the 356 00:19:13,720 --> 00:19:15,680 Speaker 1: three of us as we celebrate the recording and pack 357 00:19:15,760 --> 00:19:18,760 Speaker 1: up our stuff. But as we head out from the school, 358 00:19:19,359 --> 00:19:21,800 Speaker 1: two things Bobby Sessions said keep ringing in my head. 359 00:19:22,080 --> 00:19:24,879 Speaker 1: That's a lot of responsibility that comes with that platform 360 00:19:25,080 --> 00:19:28,120 Speaker 1: he signed, and he talked about the responsibility that comes 361 00:19:28,160 --> 00:19:31,919 Speaker 1: with that. Our platform may still be minored by comparison, 362 00:19:32,520 --> 00:19:35,359 Speaker 1: but our social responsibility is exactly what we were debating 363 00:19:35,359 --> 00:19:38,720 Speaker 1: before the interview started. Marco, when I chat about it 364 00:19:38,760 --> 00:19:41,560 Speaker 1: more on the subway right back to Far Rockaway, but 365 00:19:41,600 --> 00:19:44,800 Speaker 1: I'm still unpacking the Bobby Sessions interview when he started 366 00:19:44,800 --> 00:19:48,399 Speaker 1: talking about parents not supporting artistic careers, about not feeling 367 00:19:48,520 --> 00:19:51,840 Speaker 1: entitled to that, and that hit home for me. It's 368 00:19:51,840 --> 00:19:54,680 Speaker 1: what I've been struggling with with my parents. It's why 369 00:19:54,720 --> 00:19:57,280 Speaker 1: it's all led to me being grounded and now in therapy, 370 00:19:58,080 --> 00:20:01,720 Speaker 1: all I really wanted was some support, encouragement and understanding 371 00:20:01,800 --> 00:20:04,720 Speaker 1: from my parents. Bobby's lying cuts me so deep I 372 00:20:04,720 --> 00:20:09,720 Speaker 1: can't get it out of my head. Marco. When not 373 00:20:09,760 --> 00:20:11,960 Speaker 1: split up at the station, I pull out my phone 374 00:20:12,000 --> 00:20:14,119 Speaker 1: during I walk home and send a d M to Umpah. 375 00:20:14,800 --> 00:20:16,560 Speaker 1: I asked if she'd be willing to be our season 376 00:20:16,560 --> 00:20:19,520 Speaker 1: finale guests, and in no time I find myself at 377 00:20:19,560 --> 00:20:22,760 Speaker 1: the front door. You don't owe me support because you're 378 00:20:22,800 --> 00:20:27,240 Speaker 1: life parents. Any child that's expecting their parents to do that, 379 00:20:27,560 --> 00:20:42,640 Speaker 1: I wouldn't do it. Hey, Ruben, and how is your interview? 380 00:20:43,200 --> 00:20:45,560 Speaker 1: It went well. We're almost done with the season and 381 00:20:45,600 --> 00:20:49,040 Speaker 1: almost ready for the final project presentation in school. Good good, 382 00:20:49,560 --> 00:20:51,800 Speaker 1: slide my backpack off my shoulder and sit down by 383 00:20:51,880 --> 00:20:55,399 Speaker 1: mom on the couch. Here goes nothing. I want to 384 00:20:55,400 --> 00:20:58,120 Speaker 1: ask you both something go for a kid though. After 385 00:20:58,160 --> 00:21:00,879 Speaker 1: our final interview next week, Janelle is going out to 386 00:21:00,920 --> 00:21:05,160 Speaker 1: a BLM rally in Brooklyn. She invited me along, sort 387 00:21:05,200 --> 00:21:09,399 Speaker 1: of jokingly because she knows I'm still grounded, But I figured, 388 00:21:09,560 --> 00:21:11,960 Speaker 1: you know, maybe if it was worth a shot to 389 00:21:12,000 --> 00:21:13,960 Speaker 1: ask if I could go out with her and Marco 390 00:21:14,040 --> 00:21:16,560 Speaker 1: for a good talks. Mom puts down Bell Hook's book 391 00:21:16,640 --> 00:21:20,800 Speaker 1: All about Love and gives me her full attention. That's funny. 392 00:21:21,200 --> 00:21:24,040 Speaker 1: It's the same book Janelle was reading when I met him. Boy, 393 00:21:24,080 --> 00:21:29,040 Speaker 1: are you trying to play us? That's clever. You're smart, honey, 394 00:21:29,040 --> 00:21:32,560 Speaker 1: he gets that from me. I mean it has been 395 00:21:32,600 --> 00:21:36,240 Speaker 1: over a month. Things are going well in therapy. Why 396 00:21:36,240 --> 00:21:41,200 Speaker 1: not ask well? As long as you're being honest, I'm 397 00:21:41,320 --> 00:21:44,920 Speaker 1: in favor of you being part of something bigger than yourself. 398 00:21:45,760 --> 00:21:49,800 Speaker 1: I turned on my mom a little shocked. I thought 399 00:21:49,800 --> 00:21:52,560 Speaker 1: she'd take more convincing than that, all her worries about 400 00:21:52,600 --> 00:21:55,200 Speaker 1: me being out in the city at night. Reuben, your 401 00:21:55,240 --> 00:21:58,159 Speaker 1: dad and I will talk about this tonight, gather the 402 00:21:58,200 --> 00:22:01,840 Speaker 1: details about when, where, what time, and we'll think about 403 00:22:01,880 --> 00:22:05,359 Speaker 1: it as long as you, Marco and Janelle take the 404 00:22:05,440 --> 00:22:10,760 Speaker 1: right precautions and stick together. I think I have some 405 00:22:10,800 --> 00:22:13,159 Speaker 1: permanent markers, so you guys can write your phone numbers 406 00:22:13,160 --> 00:22:16,639 Speaker 1: on your wrists, and I'll run to the store and 407 00:22:16,680 --> 00:22:18,639 Speaker 1: grab a few bottles of whole milk for each of 408 00:22:18,680 --> 00:22:22,919 Speaker 1: you in case of pepper spray. WHOA, My mom is 409 00:22:22,960 --> 00:22:27,159 Speaker 1: really cool with this, Yes, ma'am, Damn, you got it 410 00:22:27,160 --> 00:22:30,200 Speaker 1: all worked out, well, can we at least talk about 411 00:22:30,240 --> 00:22:35,360 Speaker 1: bail funds tonight too? You're silly, but yes, we'll talk 412 00:22:35,400 --> 00:22:38,080 Speaker 1: more later. I'm just glad things are getting back to 413 00:22:38,080 --> 00:22:41,560 Speaker 1: normal around here, well the new normal. What do you mean, 414 00:22:41,880 --> 00:22:45,280 Speaker 1: you know, with your surprise podcast project and now you've 415 00:22:45,280 --> 00:22:48,760 Speaker 1: gone and got all political. Honest, you've given us a 416 00:22:48,760 --> 00:22:51,840 Speaker 1: lot to digest in the last few months. Is this 417 00:22:51,880 --> 00:22:55,240 Speaker 1: what other parents feel like when they're teenagers? Rebel? I 418 00:22:55,280 --> 00:22:58,640 Speaker 1: pause because I feel a nurse to disagree here comes 419 00:22:58,680 --> 00:23:00,520 Speaker 1: to break is not an active repel you, and it's 420 00:23:00,560 --> 00:23:04,359 Speaker 1: a business and career opportunity. But I bite my tongue. 421 00:23:05,040 --> 00:23:07,280 Speaker 1: I don't know. I've gone pretty easy on you on 422 00:23:07,359 --> 00:23:10,399 Speaker 1: the team rebellion front. I guess I had to balance 423 00:23:10,440 --> 00:23:12,439 Speaker 1: things up. That winks at me and gets back up 424 00:23:12,480 --> 00:23:15,960 Speaker 1: to head into the kitchen. Talk concluded, I take my 425 00:23:16,000 --> 00:23:24,240 Speaker 1: bag upstairs to my room. Tonight is the night I 426 00:23:24,280 --> 00:23:28,760 Speaker 1: could feel it. I'm gonna make my meditation breakthrough, get 427 00:23:28,840 --> 00:23:30,960 Speaker 1: all the way to the closing bil without moving or 428 00:23:31,000 --> 00:23:37,440 Speaker 1: opening my eyes. I silenced my notifications settle in the 429 00:23:37,520 --> 00:23:39,359 Speaker 1: first starts to drift through my mind are the ones 430 00:23:39,400 --> 00:23:41,720 Speaker 1: that have popped up all day, the same way they do. 431 00:23:41,720 --> 00:23:44,480 Speaker 1: When you're drifting off to sleep, floating in the void 432 00:23:44,520 --> 00:23:47,080 Speaker 1: of my closed eyes, I see Janelle pushing back against 433 00:23:47,119 --> 00:23:49,760 Speaker 1: going commercial. I see my parents given in to me 434 00:23:49,800 --> 00:23:54,399 Speaker 1: going out to the protest. But as those visions passed deeper, 435 00:23:54,440 --> 00:23:56,960 Speaker 1: recollections from the podcast in the last three months start 436 00:23:56,960 --> 00:24:00,159 Speaker 1: popping up like bubbles in my mind. I start to 437 00:24:00,200 --> 00:24:03,320 Speaker 1: fill a pins and needles buzzing in my feet as 438 00:24:03,320 --> 00:24:05,760 Speaker 1: a rush of podcasts when when he floods my quiet brain, 439 00:24:09,119 --> 00:24:12,080 Speaker 1: I try to meditate as much as I can, like 440 00:24:12,400 --> 00:24:15,680 Speaker 1: every day, every other day. We all got a DNA 441 00:24:15,760 --> 00:24:17,840 Speaker 1: that we fight like a lot. A lot of people 442 00:24:18,119 --> 00:24:20,400 Speaker 1: don't really talk about it like that, but I don't 443 00:24:20,400 --> 00:24:24,720 Speaker 1: really kid. You gotta do with anxiety. I have huge anxiety. 444 00:24:24,800 --> 00:24:27,320 Speaker 1: It's like really bad. But lately I've been finding a 445 00:24:27,359 --> 00:24:28,960 Speaker 1: lot of ways to cope with it and just kind 446 00:24:28,960 --> 00:24:30,840 Speaker 1: of like get through it because I feel like a 447 00:24:30,840 --> 00:24:33,040 Speaker 1: lot of it is fear of certain things. So I 448 00:24:33,119 --> 00:24:35,640 Speaker 1: just try to like go with it and just try 449 00:24:35,680 --> 00:24:37,640 Speaker 1: to like hope it's not going to turn out bad. 450 00:24:38,040 --> 00:24:41,800 Speaker 1: The days of my constant panic attacks feel so distant now. 451 00:24:42,560 --> 00:24:46,640 Speaker 1: My Dad's right, there's a new normal around here. The pod. 452 00:24:46,720 --> 00:24:51,600 Speaker 1: Success isn't just in external accomplishment. Do this work. I'm 453 00:24:51,600 --> 00:24:54,879 Speaker 1: finally getting to know myself again. More people care than 454 00:24:55,200 --> 00:24:58,880 Speaker 1: you think if you are looking for help. Actually it's 455 00:24:58,920 --> 00:25:02,920 Speaker 1: usually there. It's just gonna take a little longer. That's it. 456 00:25:02,920 --> 00:25:06,080 Speaker 1: It's more again when you be yourself, be patient, have 457 00:25:06,240 --> 00:25:09,000 Speaker 1: intuition about the situation. There's gonna be times where everyone 458 00:25:09,080 --> 00:25:11,600 Speaker 1: is wrong and you're the right one. But you also 459 00:25:11,640 --> 00:25:13,560 Speaker 1: have to continue to be humbled. You know. Don't shoot 460 00:25:13,560 --> 00:25:16,480 Speaker 1: yourself as a foot. And I did shoot myself in 461 00:25:16,520 --> 00:25:19,160 Speaker 1: the foot the way I handled the pie with my parents, 462 00:25:20,080 --> 00:25:24,159 Speaker 1: the way I handled viral villa with everyone. But personally, 463 00:25:24,800 --> 00:25:29,600 Speaker 1: deep down, I'm proud I took a stand. It was messy, 464 00:25:29,920 --> 00:25:32,879 Speaker 1: but it was a necessary part of this whole painful process. 465 00:25:33,760 --> 00:25:36,560 Speaker 1: Depends and needles in my feet extend up through my thighs. 466 00:25:37,280 --> 00:25:40,640 Speaker 1: Even as all these recollections swirl around me, I feel 467 00:25:40,680 --> 00:25:44,920 Speaker 1: more center than I haven't months. This is really quick 468 00:25:44,960 --> 00:25:47,520 Speaker 1: and all that. That's when the will power going to play. 469 00:25:47,560 --> 00:25:53,879 Speaker 1: A lot of struggles and anxiety and depression and self 470 00:25:53,920 --> 00:25:56,680 Speaker 1: doubt and second guessing. A lot of that is attached 471 00:25:56,760 --> 00:26:01,600 Speaker 1: to time. Time I've been sought of sorts with time 472 00:26:02,800 --> 00:26:06,399 Speaker 1: trapped years backwards in my head, nursing wounds about my 473 00:26:06,440 --> 00:26:10,120 Speaker 1: shutdown VI an account, all hesitant about the podcast because 474 00:26:10,119 --> 00:26:12,560 Speaker 1: I wasn't sure I was ready. I wasn't sure it 475 00:26:12,640 --> 00:26:17,639 Speaker 1: was time yet. Wow. I was so proud of my 476 00:26:17,720 --> 00:26:21,520 Speaker 1: viral villa stunt. It felt so free because I haven't 477 00:26:21,520 --> 00:26:23,320 Speaker 1: known how to live in the moment and just be 478 00:26:24,440 --> 00:26:27,119 Speaker 1: be president. You have to know every single step with 479 00:26:27,160 --> 00:26:29,240 Speaker 1: your journey, otherwise you're not gonna be able to retrace 480 00:26:29,320 --> 00:26:32,119 Speaker 1: them and go back to point eight on the drawing 481 00:26:32,160 --> 00:26:34,400 Speaker 1: board whenever you need to. Now you believe in yourself 482 00:26:34,480 --> 00:26:36,879 Speaker 1: and or you believe that you're going to be successful, 483 00:26:37,240 --> 00:26:40,280 Speaker 1: you need to depend on that and no external validation 484 00:26:40,400 --> 00:26:51,600 Speaker 1: from anyone else. I did it. Pins and needles received 485 00:26:51,640 --> 00:26:54,000 Speaker 1: as I unfold from my half lotus position and checked 486 00:26:54,040 --> 00:26:57,720 Speaker 1: the meditation app. That definitely did not feel like ten minutes. 487 00:26:58,359 --> 00:27:00,720 Speaker 1: We felt like so many ideas fly around my head 488 00:27:00,720 --> 00:27:04,919 Speaker 1: and mounted to nearly nothing at all. I wasn't distracting 489 00:27:04,960 --> 00:27:09,600 Speaker 1: myself this time. I was collecting myself and now. An 490 00:27:09,600 --> 00:27:16,959 Speaker 1: exclusive track from Bobby Sessions, Can I Talk my Ship? Yeah? 491 00:27:17,720 --> 00:27:23,800 Speaker 1: One question I have? Can I talk my Ship? Yeah? 492 00:27:24,240 --> 00:27:31,600 Speaker 1: He can I talk to my ship. One question that 493 00:27:31,680 --> 00:27:38,520 Speaker 1: I can talk in my ship. I'm gonna talk about it. 494 00:27:38,840 --> 00:27:41,680 Speaker 1: You gotta problem, say so, get my check. No Billy Jean, 495 00:27:41,880 --> 00:27:44,920 Speaker 1: her hair go off. No guillotine kick green like Draymond 496 00:27:45,400 --> 00:27:48,480 Speaker 1: all the years with day one spreading like like hey, 497 00:27:47,920 --> 00:27:51,840 Speaker 1: cooking up right, que ain't nothing to funk with. Shout 498 00:27:51,880 --> 00:27:55,280 Speaker 1: out the wood. I was swearing to chuck tis without 499 00:27:55,280 --> 00:27:57,800 Speaker 1: the shoes shine. I was an asshole when I was 500 00:27:57,880 --> 00:28:00,760 Speaker 1: eighteen leaving the school. Now I got an afro. You 501 00:28:00,800 --> 00:28:03,199 Speaker 1: got that big gin You got that dude, I got here, 502 00:28:03,200 --> 00:28:05,239 Speaker 1: but that wo out the maam. I'm gonna just move 503 00:28:05,320 --> 00:28:08,200 Speaker 1: out to pay buy me, y'all, look out family, all 504 00:28:08,240 --> 00:28:10,800 Speaker 1: it said, I'm a sam whoa you know on the go, 505 00:28:11,040 --> 00:28:13,520 Speaker 1: I might just pull off the lamb you pull off 506 00:28:13,560 --> 00:28:15,440 Speaker 1: a man, I might pull a poop up and I'll 507 00:28:15,480 --> 00:28:16,879 Speaker 1: keep it sup up for all the folks in the 508 00:28:16,960 --> 00:28:20,000 Speaker 1: can trying to go buy the lamb that's in the pool, 509 00:28:20,080 --> 00:28:23,080 Speaker 1: like round making that move. I am what I am 510 00:28:23,359 --> 00:28:26,000 Speaker 1: what I think in my dream. I don't sleep, see 511 00:28:26,000 --> 00:28:28,399 Speaker 1: my tooth. I don't blink. Track your brain. The thing 512 00:28:28,440 --> 00:28:31,440 Speaker 1: like me and the bass key using my staff to 513 00:28:31,480 --> 00:28:34,199 Speaker 1: seat and proving my health. Key, I don't set up 514 00:28:34,200 --> 00:28:44,000 Speaker 1: for lash, keep cocking my flash skeet, none of my 515 00:28:44,120 --> 00:28:47,480 Speaker 1: nag to skeep none of a tag keep runna da 516 00:28:47,720 --> 00:28:56,440 Speaker 1: set a check it. I woke up this morning and 517 00:28:56,640 --> 00:28:59,640 Speaker 1: I said, fun, my nine to five ain't nothing legend 518 00:28:59,680 --> 00:29:02,800 Speaker 1: that by working at a job ty did not happen 519 00:29:02,840 --> 00:29:05,280 Speaker 1: ship that I know, but longing me got a quick 520 00:29:05,360 --> 00:29:07,760 Speaker 1: second guess and man, what the hell it roves need? 521 00:29:07,960 --> 00:29:10,840 Speaker 1: I need racks on racks by the whole damn rack 522 00:29:11,200 --> 00:29:14,400 Speaker 1: made the mus shut down, get the washbus down. I'm 523 00:29:14,440 --> 00:29:17,440 Speaker 1: trying to catching busses for a table to bust down. 524 00:29:17,520 --> 00:29:20,080 Speaker 1: I know the problem, but the better question is what 525 00:29:20,360 --> 00:29:22,760 Speaker 1: now money? Your power? I needed to living below my 526 00:29:22,800 --> 00:29:24,960 Speaker 1: potentially they feed in my stappit. I'll need information. I 527 00:29:25,000 --> 00:29:26,640 Speaker 1: see it is set and demand what I wanted Muna 528 00:29:26,640 --> 00:29:28,520 Speaker 1: speak to exist as you received it. You had to 529 00:29:28,560 --> 00:29:30,600 Speaker 1: believe it all of my dubs. I'm gonna leave it behind. 530 00:29:31,040 --> 00:29:33,000 Speaker 1: Talking will open. I started without hoping it down. It's 531 00:29:33,000 --> 00:29:35,000 Speaker 1: a waste of my time. I know what happened for 532 00:29:35,040 --> 00:29:37,040 Speaker 1: a local after he talking ship didn't want to pronto 533 00:29:37,120 --> 00:29:39,280 Speaker 1: after open passes be a global rap. But I O 534 00:29:39,400 --> 00:29:41,400 Speaker 1: my hapbits, took it, call my actions. Put my dogs 535 00:29:41,440 --> 00:29:44,240 Speaker 1: like crew, well free Willy, I do well. Hit the 536 00:29:44,320 --> 00:29:48,760 Speaker 1: league like blue Bell, I am the best. Keep using 537 00:29:48,800 --> 00:29:51,920 Speaker 1: my shaf keep and proving my health. Keep. Don't set 538 00:29:51,960 --> 00:30:00,640 Speaker 1: up for last, keep a ca come my flash of 539 00:30:00,720 --> 00:30:05,000 Speaker 1: feet running my nag. Set run up a check running 540 00:30:05,000 --> 00:30:31,920 Speaker 1: them Dad Feet Here Comes to Break is produced by 541 00:30:31,960 --> 00:30:35,360 Speaker 1: Double Elvis and partnership with I Heart Radio. Executive produced 542 00:30:35,360 --> 00:30:39,000 Speaker 1: by Deaf Jam Recordings. Executive produced by and starring Asanti 543 00:30:39,040 --> 00:30:42,440 Speaker 1: Black Is Ruben, Produced by Danielle Perkins who plays Janelle, 544 00:30:42,720 --> 00:30:46,840 Speaker 1: Bobby cs is Marco, Christopher V. Edwards as Dad, Raymie 545 00:30:46,920 --> 00:30:50,400 Speaker 1: Cornell is Mom, and Taylor Bettinson. Written by Taylor Bettinson 546 00:30:50,520 --> 00:30:53,680 Speaker 1: and the Kida Hill Artist Interviews conducted by Nikia Hill, 547 00:30:54,240 --> 00:30:57,560 Speaker 1: directed by Christopher V. Edwards, mixed and edited by Matt 548 00:30:57,560 --> 00:31:01,320 Speaker 1: ta Hainey, Sound recording by Colin Flem Music Elements and 549 00:31:01,360 --> 00:31:05,360 Speaker 1: production by Ryan's Breaker. Additional production support by Jamie Dimons. 550 00:31:05,840 --> 00:31:09,760 Speaker 1: Executive produced by Jake Brennan and Brady Sadler for Double Elvis. 551 00:31:09,800 --> 00:31:14,400 Speaker 1: Special thanks to Orin Rosenbaum, Shelby Shankman, Sarah Kane, and 552 00:31:14,520 --> 00:31:18,960 Speaker 1: Jordan Garrellic United Talent Agency, Beck Comedian Marketing, Barack Moffatt 553 00:31:19,000 --> 00:31:23,600 Speaker 1: and Universal Music Group Rich Isaacson, Lind Gonzalez, Charlene Thomas, 554 00:31:23,840 --> 00:31:28,600 Speaker 1: Merrissa Pizarro, Gabriel to Serrierio, Jessica Manarino and Nya Fleming 555 00:31:28,760 --> 00:31:33,080 Speaker 1: at Deaf Jam Recordings and Conald Burn, Carrie Lieberman, Will Pearson, 556 00:31:33,400 --> 00:31:36,240 Speaker 1: Noel Brown and the entire I Heeart Media team to 557 00:31:36,280 --> 00:31:38,920 Speaker 1: hear bonus content, meet the cast, and go behind the 558 00:31:38,960 --> 00:31:41,040 Speaker 1: scenes of Here It Comes to Break. Follow with double 559 00:31:41,080 --> 00:32:04,480 Speaker 1: Elvis on Instagram or visit double elvis dot com. L 560 00:32:04,560 --> 00:32:04,920 Speaker 1: another