Speaker 1: Look man, oh, I see you. Why and look over there?
Speaker 1: How is that culture? Yes? Goodness, let's culture calling. And
Speaker 1: at this point I want to run this by Bowen.
Speaker 1: We've all been recording us and our guests. I've all
Speaker 1: been recording, and we've had an amazing conversation so far
Speaker 1: that hasn't been on the pot, don't you agree? And
Speaker 1: so I think that we should go back and you
Speaker 1: can listen now to the conversation that we've been having.
Speaker 1: I don't know what's what's happening to play the conversation
Speaker 1: that we all just had together now. But see, no,
Speaker 1: here's the thing. I stopped my recording and I Bowen,
Speaker 1: Oh that we got We got to restart now, No,
Speaker 1: just no, we don't. Let's restart. Okay, Anna has the recording.
Speaker 1: We don't have to start. Okay, Um, we're gonna play
Speaker 1: this converse, this little bit of this, this little beat
Speaker 1: of conversation. Now, Hi, does George have a pop filter?
Speaker 1: I don't. I'm sorry, Okay, great, you might want to
Speaker 1: move just slightly back from it. I can it's get yeah,
Speaker 1: there you go, thank you, push them push the mic
Speaker 1: forward to Okay, is this better? Slightly? It's hard to
Speaker 1: tell until you get going, but it'll thank you. I
Speaker 1: was actually very passive, aggressively sent to pop filter. Um
Speaker 1: didn't know it was coming, and all of a sudden
Speaker 1: it arrived and I realized what that what was being
Speaker 1: said about me behind my back was that I needed
Speaker 1: a pop filter. This industry is so cruel. It's very cruel,
Speaker 1: and there's a lot of you know, straight men that
Speaker 1: we work with sending gay men pop filters. And it's
Speaker 1: a micro aggression. It says, it says, be silent, It
Speaker 1: says you know what I mean. It says, don't pop
Speaker 1: you know. Yeah, it says, oh, try saying an s yeah,
Speaker 1: it's saying your lisp is in the way, sounds a little.
Speaker 1: It says, you know, it says, you know what your
Speaker 1: ps and bees, which is a little coded, are popping.
Speaker 1: And I said, you jam right, my p's and b's pop.
Speaker 1: I'll save it for the pod. This is gold my
Speaker 1: And they see me after school, Oh wow, oh my god,
Speaker 1: little Mama. For some reason, that track was always too
Speaker 1: loud on my iTunes and when it came on, it
Speaker 1: would just like be like them mixing already. There's something revolutionary, Okay,
Speaker 1: So that was our conversation. That was our amazing conversation
Speaker 1: with our guests. This is historic, Yeah, this is fun
Speaker 1: though I like that we haven't done this before. Yeah.
Speaker 1: And it's also like I thought that what we were
Speaker 1: talking about was so interesting, which was the song Little
Speaker 1: Mama and everl Levine you mean girl for the Girlfriend remix? Yeah,
Speaker 1: that's what. But I also think that it's it's fun
Speaker 1: to say it's the song. What a moment in culture
Speaker 1: little Mama. I mean, things just really stopped with her
Speaker 1: when she like stormed the stage at the vm as
Speaker 1: that one you remember, Yeah, well they stopped nine. That
Speaker 1: was like, I think the last moment where it was
Speaker 1: permissible to be a little Mama in public. Um. But
Speaker 1: before that, never forget where she when she was like, um,
Speaker 1: you always ceased to have you amaze me? Yeah, you
Speaker 1: all you guys are so amazing. You always ceased to
Speaker 1: amaze me. You always ceased to amaze me, which is
Speaker 1: truly iconic American's Expect Dance Crew Little Mama is the judge. Yes,
Speaker 1: you know, I think I think she was really important
Speaker 1: to the culture we were all talking about. As you
Speaker 1: just heard how the song Little Mama Novre Levine is
Speaker 1: the mix on it is insane. Oh no, I'm sorry.
Speaker 1: On lip glosses insane, glass is amazing. And you know what, Actually,
Speaker 1: Little Mama is a moment of a culture and she
Speaker 1: didn't make the list. We may have to do another list.
Speaker 1: We may have to do another list, Matt. I, well,
Speaker 1: first I want to check in with you. How are
Speaker 1: you dealing with fame? How am I dealing with fames? Uh?
Speaker 1: It's it's been a lot. You know, I'm very famous
Speaker 1: now and O that hot Dog is out. I'm famous.
Speaker 1: I'm in the A list. Blake Lively is texting me,
Speaker 1: which is my first That's exactly the first place my
Speaker 1: brain went, Okay, you're famous. What happens to you? Blake
Speaker 1: Lively texts, um No, it's I'm super excited about the
Speaker 1: show being out. I think it looks really cute. I
Speaker 1: think it's so wonderful. It's so great. I'm so you
Speaker 1: like it. I love it so much. It's made me
Speaker 1: so happy. I've rewatched the episodes. Thank you for doing that.
Speaker 1: I I love the sort of um Trojan horsing of
Speaker 1: Grue into the show. Did you notice that I was
Speaker 1: very myself on the show? Yes, and we love that,
Speaker 1: and you say that in a way that is well,
Speaker 1: can I say something that's weird? M okay, So I've
Speaker 1: really never seen like myself in like a long form
Speaker 1: on screen, like being myself, and so watching myself it
Speaker 1: was sort of like meeting a stranger that I knew.
Speaker 1: Does that make sense? It's like I don't know that
Speaker 1: person at all, and I wonder if I encountered that person,
Speaker 1: what I would feel like and what I would or do. Um,
Speaker 1: but I I understand that that is me. It's weird
Speaker 1: to see yourself on You're being played, You're literally being
Speaker 1: played back like a condensed edited version of yourself, and
Speaker 1: you're like, oh, this is me. Yeah, and that's you know,
Speaker 1: something that you've been dealing with for some time. Although
Speaker 1: often often times when you're on screen you're wearing sort
Speaker 1: of a fun wig or you know, like a Saturday
Speaker 1: Night Live style costume. Yes, yes, and yet I still
Speaker 1: think that's not me. Yeah, well, I have to performance.
Speaker 1: That's true, That's very true. You you get me, and
Speaker 1: you've got me good. You know you have for you literally, Jester,
Speaker 1: you have done it again and again and again, and
Speaker 1: every time you're doing amazing sketch. You're doing it again,
Speaker 1: just Jester. I don't. I don't anticipate being in these
Speaker 1: shows whatsoever. Why do you say this? Why you feel
Speaker 1: this way? I feel this way because it's you know,
Speaker 1: there's it's gonna be a shorter show, and uh, there's
Speaker 1: just there's just not as much real estate, and there's
Speaker 1: more and there's more, and it's the biggest cast we've
Speaker 1: ever had in the history of the show. And there's
Speaker 1: four people on the gast four hundred nine. At that point,
Speaker 1: I think they just put they just just have fo
Speaker 1: you know what I mean? No, I learned like its
Speaker 1: the prime number. Okay, that a lot of sense. It
Speaker 1: might be twenty twenty. This is one of our most
Speaker 1: beautiful traditions on the show is where we have a
Speaker 1: little four top going don't love a four top, love
Speaker 1: a square m love a sort of you know quadrant. Yeah, exactly,
Speaker 1: Sex in the city. And that's exactly what I was thinking,
Speaker 1: this is sex in the city, especially when I looked
Speaker 1: at one of the people that we have on the show,
Speaker 1: because famously, you know this person who we are not
Speaker 1: saying their name because they're the guests, and then we
Speaker 1: haven't revealed the guests. But one of them used to
Speaker 1: do sex in the City live stagings with you, Owen.
Speaker 1: That's right, and we've talked about this every time he's
Speaker 1: been on the show. Yes, but but you know, you know,
Speaker 1: sometimes like some people, new people are tuning in, you
Speaker 1: have to tell them history. That's right. History, History has
Speaker 1: its eyes on us. And I am just so happy
Speaker 1: that these these two boys are here. There's some of
Speaker 1: my well they have they host my favorite pot, they
Speaker 1: host my favorite podcast. You know, there's been a Nympho
Speaker 1: Wars sized vacuum hole in the podcast space, and I
Speaker 1: think their big hole. They're they're they're not really meaning
Speaker 1: that occasion, but it's it's sort of cerebral on the
Speaker 1: same level as Nympho Wars was. And some on some level,
Speaker 1: wouldn't you say, no, no, okay, no, I don't think
Speaker 1: they're as smart as them. Okay, no, no, no, no, no, no,
Speaker 1: I don't. I actually don't tune in for the intelligence.
Speaker 1: I tune in for the left. I tuned in for
Speaker 1: the last These these two boys are very smart, very funny.
Speaker 1: I think above all else, I would say, above all else,
Speaker 1: Number one, they are funny. It's number one. Second, as
Speaker 1: they are white. Third is they're gay. Yes, is that
Speaker 1: they are so cute, so cute, so cute. And you
Speaker 1: and I throughout the years have discussed with each other
Speaker 1: our crushes on the boys. Oh my god, that's right.
Speaker 1: We have little tarted, little tickles lit little tickles. Sam
Speaker 1: is and he's wearing this Neon chromatic A shirt that
Speaker 1: I just noticed. And he is he really is. He's
Speaker 1: doing he's doing that. He's doing the cut it out
Speaker 1: motion with us with his hands. But we're not gonna.
Speaker 1: We're not gonna. We felt little tickles sometimes when it
Speaker 1: comes to these boys, and actually it's a front runner
Speaker 1: for title of that little tickles, Little tickles sometimes, little
Speaker 1: tickles sometimes. Okay, So I think at this point we
Speaker 1: bring them in. They host the wonderful podcast Stradio Lab
Speaker 1: Welcome into Your Ears. George Severs, Oh my god, goodnight. Okay,
Speaker 1: I have to say something, and I said, I brought
Speaker 1: this up to Matt the other day. We've we've Matt.
Speaker 1: I think he's made this comparison. He goes, um. I
Speaker 1: think he mets like, oh, I'm the Sam and you're
Speaker 1: the George. And I was like, I actually think it's
Speaker 1: flipped where I'm the salmon, Matt's the George, because Matt
Speaker 1: and George both um lead the conversation and what are
Speaker 1: you doing right now? You're fired? But I just think
Speaker 1: Sam and I are like, really, we're kind of like
Speaker 1: the steady sort of rocks in the in the duo,
Speaker 1: and we're sort of like, yeah, okay, that's that's interesting.
Speaker 1: And then George and Matt are the ones popping off
Speaker 1: kind of connecting all the dots together doing all of
Speaker 1: that interesting. I mean, what do you what do you think?
Speaker 1: I mean, it's definitely a contrarian theory, but not one
Speaker 1: that I disagree with. I I see the connection there.
Speaker 1: You think you're more down to earth than I am.
Speaker 1: It's down to earth like just like like you know,
Speaker 1: what's just exactly exactly the conversation? No, no, no, you
Speaker 1: see what happened right there, Sam half he got halfway
Speaker 1: through a thought and didn't know the rest of the words,
Speaker 1: which is me culture and for nothing. Everyone. One thing
Speaker 1: is that in every podcast, du oh, there's one that
Speaker 1: knows plays and knows books and one that doesn't know
Speaker 1: plays and books. And Sam and I samoks, you don't
Speaker 1: know books? Sam no, Sam knows abouts, Sam does know about.
Speaker 1: That's ridiculous to say I publicly read Sam is it
Speaker 1: was an English major majored in Sam. Oh my god,
Speaker 1: I didn't even read a book until you know, I
Speaker 1: was in my twenties. That's that's false advertising. I'm self
Speaker 1: taught and I and I brought in this very like
Speaker 1: terrible conversational frame. It's not true. There's no like, you know,
Speaker 1: perfect alignment with this. But I'm just saying, like, isn't
Speaker 1: it fun to think of each of the four of
Speaker 1: us is very multitude in as people. Yeah, it's so
Speaker 1: fun to think about that. But I mean, I don't
Speaker 1: think that's the truth. I don't know that we have
Speaker 1: that much. The first thing they told us when they
Speaker 1: we we've talked about this on the podcast, but we
Speaker 1: were part of a podcasting reality show and then we won,
Speaker 1: and then we are in contract to produce four episodes
Speaker 1: of the podcast. Paula Abdual chose us, and one thing
Speaker 1: they said is if you contain multitudes, you have to
Speaker 1: pick one and one person has to have one multitude
Speaker 1: and the other person has to have the other, and
Speaker 1: they need to be complimentary exactly exactly which is such
Speaker 1: a helpful note. I feel like we've grown so much,
Speaker 1: I mean not too much because we don't want to
Speaker 1: gain more. So they said grow, uh, you know, a
Speaker 1: pre specified amount, and after each episode they tell us
Speaker 1: that too much growth or not enough growth. Yeah. I
Speaker 1: guess one question that I have right away, just to
Speaker 1: start off the podcast is does paul us give you
Speaker 1: guys what's on every episode? Um? I think in this
Speaker 1: universe that we've created, she does give us notes. She
Speaker 1: emails us every single episode be released. Well, she emails
Speaker 1: Sam because he's more he words, but then she sends
Speaker 1: me a video of of her dancing the interpreting. It's
Speaker 1: like she's doing a dance performance that conveys what her
Speaker 1: critiques are. She's producing UM both Hillary Clinton and Bethany
Speaker 1: Frankel's new podcasts. Wow, those are I think we're going
Speaker 1: to be really similar. Actually, do you know what I
Speaker 1: was trying? I was looking at I don't know why
Speaker 1: I was looking at the podcast um rankings, which are
Speaker 1: so depressing because it's totally like you know, uh, Megan
Speaker 1: Kelly and I saw that the two high profile podcasts
Speaker 1: that are about drepremiere are Bethany and Hillary and I
Speaker 1: thought I wanted to make some kind of joke that
Speaker 1: was like, whoever wins, that means the election will go
Speaker 1: one way. And then I was like, wait, which way
Speaker 1: would that mean? Which one of them is? Yeah, that's
Speaker 1: interesting if you were to pull people, do you like
Speaker 1: Beth and your Hillary better? Which one of them is
Speaker 1: Trump and which one is Biden. I think it is
Speaker 1: sort of an Alien versus Predator situation where it's no
Speaker 1: matter who wins, we lose. Yes, Yeah, And that's that's
Speaker 1: actually really important to say, and never forget that in
Speaker 1: the movie Alien Versus Predator, Kelly Rowland gets murdered after
Speaker 1: she calls um uh Freddy Krueger a faggot. So I
Speaker 1: would just say it is I don't know if it's
Speaker 1: I'm not allowed to that really did happen. I'm not
Speaker 1: allowed to coin a rule of culture, but I do
Speaker 1: want to say, just for this year, I would say
Speaker 1: a rule of culture is, no matter who wins, we
Speaker 1: lose Alien Versus Predator. I think it's rule culture number
Speaker 1: seventy one this year, no matter matter ruins, we lose.
Speaker 1: That is a tough rule of culture, but you know,
Speaker 1: I think it's I can get some catchy, tough but catchy.
Speaker 1: It's it's it's officially in. It's officially and I mean
Speaker 1: once once we say it in unison, it's in. It's sealed. Darling.
Speaker 1: Who was that young girl it was? You know who?
Speaker 1: It was Martha. It was not Martha mll it was.
Speaker 1: It was like, we will never change the constitution because
Speaker 1: almost like that's what an amendment is to absolute graze. Oh,
Speaker 1: I'm so tired of it. I hate it dumb. And
Speaker 1: then someone smart is like, that's actually dumb. It's like, yeah,
Speaker 1: that's like their thing, Like now I know that that
Speaker 1: person said a dumb thing. You know, I don't care
Speaker 1: they're dumb, they've been dumb. Who's dumb? It's like, who's
Speaker 1: more dumb, the person saying dumb things or the person
Speaker 1: whose entire identity is pointing out that things are dumb.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, both absolutely both hashtag both both, I
Speaker 1: say hashtag after I think it'll catch on. Yeah, that
Speaker 1: sounds really smart, innovative. Wait, we're all such sisters, we
Speaker 1: really are. On our podcast, I mentioned I said something
Speaker 1: and I said, oh, and then my sisters did this.
Speaker 1: And then Sam was clearly so confused and said you know,
Speaker 1: I think I'm so used to the new meaning of
Speaker 1: sisters that I think sisters should be called brothers, because
Speaker 1: when I hear sisters, I think gay guys that I'm
Speaker 1: friends with, that you know, I'm on a text thread
Speaker 1: with perhaps, like my sisters are not gay guys, they're
Speaker 1: straight women, know, And and it's really I mean, yeah,
Speaker 1: you really don't know. That's the term is so non
Speaker 1: specific at this point. It's like aloha. It's like, shouldn't
Speaker 1: even be using it for anybody anymore? Does that make sense? Well,
Speaker 1: we've dreamed, We've sort of dreamed up something I think
Speaker 1: is better, which is Girl Brothers Girl Brothers Girl, which
Speaker 1: is a problematic movie from the late nineties right or
Speaker 1: from the you know, mid two thousands, or from like
Speaker 1: you know, it sounds like White Chicks era, Sorority Boys,
Speaker 1: Sorority boys, Yes, right right, it sounds like Sam's favorite movie.
Speaker 1: I now pronounce you Chuck and Larry. Is that really? Yes,
Speaker 1: it's okay, It's not my favorite movie, but I do
Speaker 1: think it's hot, and I do want to watch them
Speaker 1: have sex with each other. Because you think Kevin James
Speaker 1: is Kevin James your number one who's your number one?
Speaker 1: Who's my number one? James Candelfini. I really believe that
Speaker 1: for you because you love a big old, big old,
Speaker 1: big old there. I know it. Oh my god, I mean,
Speaker 1: when have you guys watched sopranos, Like when he holds
Speaker 1: a woman's head and his hands are like so big.
Speaker 1: I'm like, I'm I want to be that woman. You
Speaker 1: know what's he doing to her head, like holding her
Speaker 1: hair and it's like but his hands are gigantic on
Speaker 1: her little petite head. Oh it's romantic and sexual. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it's it's actually it's actually nature generally is has such
Speaker 1: an energy. I was recently watching well we were talking
Speaker 1: about how Lucy lu was in God of Carnage and
Speaker 1: got terrible reviews, and so then that led me down
Speaker 1: a path of because James Gandelfonie was it was in
Speaker 1: the original Broadway cast of God of Carnage. It let
Speaker 1: me down a path of watching public TV interviews with
Speaker 1: the original cast and sorry, mar Marcia Gay Hope, David
Speaker 1: Jef Daniels, good casts and um and and James Gandelfini
Speaker 1: and everyone else you know is trying Marcia, especially God
Speaker 1: bless her. It's she's trying so hard to make very
Speaker 1: kind of intricate points, and then James Gandelfinie Will just
Speaker 1: with a grunt, say so much more. I mean, he
Speaker 1: lee was that was the loss? That was sad? Yeah.
Speaker 1: I actually watched them over when I was visiting my mom.
Speaker 1: I watched enough, said I was just going to ask,
Speaker 1: how was that? Oh, it's great. I had already seen it,
Speaker 1: and it was just as good the second time. It's sad, right,
Speaker 1: I haven't seen it. It's like I would say, it's
Speaker 1: a bitter sweet. I mean, it's like one of those
Speaker 1: romantic comedies that has a non traditional narrative, but I
Speaker 1: mean it is ultimately a romantic comedy, and like, I
Speaker 1: think it has a lot of heart. I think it's
Speaker 1: one of Nicole Now We're mad, We're We're mad. Traditional
Speaker 1: narratives only, Queen. I'm sorry, but if you're making a
Speaker 1: romantic comedy, a k A rom com, you keep it traditional.
Speaker 1: Break Jennifer Ranston and Vince von found dead in a ditch,
Speaker 1: absolutely dead. If a movie isn't Runaway Bride, I don't
Speaker 1: want to watch it. It's really good to rumber one
Speaker 1: D and two. If a movie is run Away Bride
Speaker 1: The Breakup starring Jennifer Anison and Vince Vaughn when I
Speaker 1: was very young, probably you know, to um, I remember
Speaker 1: thinking this is so radical because like in spoiler in
Speaker 1: the last scene there, they no longer are together and they,
Speaker 1: I think, like see each other on the street. And
Speaker 1: I was like, this is groundbreaking that this movie ended
Speaker 1: like this. Well, they truly break up. Yes, exact, they
Speaker 1: didn't call it the Breakup for nothing. I mean, no, girl,
Speaker 1: they called it that because the movie, um sort of
Speaker 1: depicted a breakup between Vince Vaughn and Jennifer Aniston. And
Speaker 1: actually I also recently watched this movie. I don't know why,
Speaker 1: but it was on and I think it was on
Speaker 1: after Our Housewives actually, and it takes them a long
Speaker 1: time to like get into the movie the Breakup. I mean,
Speaker 1: I truly haven't watched it since I was like four,
Speaker 1: you know, thirteen, fourteen, But um, I remember, you know
Speaker 1: when you're like first like realizing you're game. I mean,
Speaker 1: this is the premise of this podcast. First realizing not
Speaker 1: not just that I like good things. It's like when
Speaker 1: you watched The Hours and you're like, oh my fucking god,
Speaker 1: that I had a moment like that with the breakup,
Speaker 1: where I was like, this is sophisticated. Well, I think
Speaker 1: that's the sweetest spot when you can watch like absolute
Speaker 1: trash and think it's smart. Like I remember watching Final
Speaker 1: Destination and being like, oh my god, this movie is
Speaker 1: so smart and so edgy, and this movie is like
Speaker 1: a book. This movie is literature. I literally I went,
Speaker 1: I went into my ap comp class and called the
Speaker 1: show lost literature. Well that was the age. That was
Speaker 1: the age like tenth and eleventh grade. You were looking
Speaker 1: at everything in terms of like symbolism, and everything was
Speaker 1: complex every Like I was watching grades and out of
Speaker 1: me being like, oh my god. In the pilot, this
Speaker 1: for shadows that I was just like I was thinking,
Speaker 1: like the most that was me with Desperate Housewives, Oh
Speaker 1: my god, oh my god. Every every episode titles a
Speaker 1: Sodheim song. It's like, yeah, like it was so easy
Speaker 1: to like lay layer on meeting onto that show to
Speaker 1: trick kids into thinking one where she where like Laurie
Speaker 1: Metcalf is like in the supermarket, do you know what
Speaker 1: would you mean? The episode Bang Bang, the iconic episode Bang,
Speaker 1: a masterpiece of story. Metcalf holds up a grocery store. Yeah,
Speaker 1: Kirston Warren. Sorry, she kills Kirston Warren. Which is the
Speaker 1: name of the actress that plays the woman who dies
Speaker 1: in then? Yes? Correct? Also, you know Dana Delaney Delaney
Speaker 1: was not in Deaths No one can say she wasn't. No,
Speaker 1: she was in it multiple times. And you know how
Speaker 1: her character left the show sudden lesbianism. Well that can
Speaker 1: be for her. Check it was. I do also remember
Speaker 1: when they were I remember also when one season ended
Speaker 1: with just a fire that burned the entire Wisteria Lane. Okay, ready,
Speaker 1: what is everyone's favorite disaster episode of a shitty soap
Speaker 1: quote unquote shitty soap show to remind you to go
Speaker 1: Sam the Gray's Anatomy episode where there's the bomb in
Speaker 1: the guy in the guy's heart or something cold black? Yes, yeah,
Speaker 1: Christina Richie comes in holding a bomb in someone's chest
Speaker 1: and this is the super Bowl episode. Isn't that right?
Speaker 1: This is the super Bowl episode? Um? It was? Um.
Speaker 1: I think it was the highest rated Grays Anatomy episode
Speaker 1: ever and I think I I watched it again the
Speaker 1: other the other week, and I think it is great television.
Speaker 1: I think it's really well written. It's it's it's really good.
Speaker 1: I mean, this is not a disaster, but my instinct
Speaker 1: was to say the Gray's Anatomy episode where they where
Speaker 1: the poll is going through two different people and ye
Speaker 1: of them like a train. Season two. Wait, Matt, do
Speaker 1: you really remember all these like the titles. I do
Speaker 1: remember the End of the World as we know It
Speaker 1: as a title. Yes, that that was a good black
Speaker 1: episode two parter It's the End of the World, ye
Speaker 1: as we know it as they know it? You guys,
Speaker 1: But I stopped watching Grays after I guess season four.
Speaker 1: It must have been. I think I made it through
Speaker 1: season six. The episode that really upset me was the
Speaker 1: shooting episode. Shooting episode that was that was that was
Speaker 1: really intense. Well, they graphically killed many characters that were
Speaker 1: serious regulars out of nowhere, and I think more I
Speaker 1: think they know they didn't They din'till there was a
Speaker 1: shooting in the Seattle Grays hospital. Yes, that's too much.
Speaker 1: I don't like that. I think the season before there
Speaker 1: was a plane crash that most of them were on.
Speaker 1: That's how Lexi dies and Mark Sloan basically, the White
Speaker 1: crashes after the shooting. Unfortunately, after the shot is after
Speaker 1: the shooting. Yeah, I think that my favorite insane moment
Speaker 1: on one of those shows had to be the tornado
Speaker 1: on with Steria Lane. Yeah, you're right, You're right. You
Speaker 1: had Roger Sterling getting paled by a picket fence. Conveniently,
Speaker 1: John Slattery was Evil Longoria's husband on the show, and
Speaker 1: he was like blackmailing her or something, or like she
Speaker 1: was gonna go to jail or something because of something
Speaker 1: he was doing. And he took a white picket fence
Speaker 1: through the chest. Come on symbolism, So, Barbara will kill
Speaker 1: you so much. He's done a lot. He's done very
Speaker 1: very very good things, and I think consistently good and
Speaker 1: very very bad things. Like I was about to say that,
Speaker 1: but I don't think he has no memorable little guest
Speaker 1: roles or recurring guest roles, and a lot of good stuff. Yes,
Speaker 1: like him as the politician in thirty Rock or yeah,
Speaker 1: was that thirty Rock. He's like the like the blue
Speaker 1: collar he wears the diaper, yeah yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: he's in a lot of good stuff. I would let
Speaker 1: him gnaw on me, Oh I would, yes, I preemptively,
Speaker 1: I would just commit suicide. Yeah, yeah, would you let
Speaker 1: him murder you in any form, or I would let
Speaker 1: him um partickle you little little tickles. I would like
Speaker 1: shoot a shoot a little like crossbow and have the
Speaker 1: arrow graze my shoulder. So I let him shoot a
Speaker 1: crossbow and shot on my face. No thanks, no thanks,
Speaker 1: poop all the time? Goodness, honey, Are you guys using
Speaker 1: these like like like these like crotch deodorants and like
Speaker 1: ball Toner stuff? No, no, no, no, no, we're I mean, well,
Speaker 1: first of all, we should say that we've been sent
Speaker 1: some stuff. And there's there's an ad that will probably
Speaker 1: get too later on this right now. I actually I'm
Speaker 1: wearing some right now. Whenever my balls are stinky as hell,
Speaker 1: I use ball Towner we I but I bought separately,
Speaker 1: went to Pure for men and bought like the fiber pills,
Speaker 1: which do not work on me. Wait us that three? Wait?
Speaker 1: You know who swears? I don't know. My whole is
Speaker 1: like my I'm like clean all the time, clean as
Speaker 1: a whistle, feels like I mean, I think, is that
Speaker 1: you're supposed to take one giant Is it that you're
Speaker 1: supposed to take one gigantic shit every day? And that's
Speaker 1: its God, it's supposed to be one to share this
Speaker 1: about myself. I take one ship every morning and that's it.
Speaker 1: That's it I'm taking. I'm taking four day total, right, yes,
Speaker 1: and I'm taking one big ship in the morning, and
Speaker 1: then I'm taking like three cauldron ones later on the day.
Speaker 1: Did you just start I've had it for like a
Speaker 1: month now, Okay, Yeah, I had weird I had a
Speaker 1: weird thing with UM. I started prep and then that
Speaker 1: was too much for me and I and I did
Speaker 1: anyone here when they started prep get a little sick
Speaker 1: in the beginning, That's what I'm saying. I did. I did,
Speaker 1: But then I was also like going through a separate,
Speaker 1: minor and non non important surgery, so I was like,
Speaker 1: I can't be also sick and doing something else. So
Speaker 1: I just stopped. Mmm. I forgot what I was gonna say,
Speaker 1: but um, generally I was gonna say that I tried
Speaker 1: pure for men. I'm still taking it, but I was
Speaker 1: taking really a month and it was kind of working,
Speaker 1: and then I stopped deeply constipated, and then I yeah,
Speaker 1: and then I started again, and I'm like still on
Speaker 1: that journey of trying to like regulate again. And it's
Speaker 1: not like working perfectly. I took it for a full
Speaker 1: calendar year with no bottoming in my life, just as
Speaker 1: a fiber supplement. I mean, is this fun to hear about?
Speaker 1: That's always what I wonder when we talk about Oh no,
Speaker 1: they love it, they love it, and I really like,
Speaker 1: I actually kind of want to say right now that,
Speaker 1: but when have you used your ball stuff that they
Speaker 1: sent you? I have, I'm willing to use it right now. OK,
Speaker 1: right now, I kind of want to like try it
Speaker 1: out now live, I'm gonna get my stuff, keep talking
Speaker 1: having butt sex and stuff. So this is this It
Speaker 1: is just like ball ball cologne. Explain. So it is
Speaker 1: a spray. It's not like a I don't know, a
Speaker 1: powder or a bomb or something. It's a spray. And
Speaker 1: then there's um like basically a cream, a lotion that's
Speaker 1: just safe for your it's screwed him safe, I guess.
Speaker 1: I don't know what about your skin down there? Would?
Speaker 1: I mean, it's it's it's it's it's less or more perfumed.
Speaker 1: I don't know. Okay, So Matt has the bottle. MAT's
Speaker 1: back with the bottle and he sprang it. So what
Speaker 1: we have here is we have bald deodorant, and we
Speaker 1: have bal Toner refreshing ball Toner. Matt. I have to say,
Speaker 1: there are so many of your listeners are currently drunking
Speaker 1: it to you explaining this process. George is right, I'm
Speaker 1: taking I'm taking my pants off. You can't see it. Okay,
Speaker 1: Oh my god, this is history and that's straight right here.
Speaker 1: So what do I use first? The toner or the deodorant.
Speaker 1: Deodorant is more of like a like a moisturizer that
Speaker 1: you can just like rub. Okay, so got I gotta
Speaker 1: got it. So this is this is like I can't
Speaker 1: believe this is happening, Like this is this is very
Speaker 1: like Howard Stern. This is Yeah, it's very Howard Stern.
Speaker 1: What is the machine on Howard Stern? That all that? Like,
Speaker 1: what do you have like a fart gunner? Like the
Speaker 1: sex you know, there's like a sex machine. Yeah, we
Speaker 1: need to do something like really messed up. I'm gonna
Speaker 1: I'm putting it in my hand. How much use I
Speaker 1: can't confirm he's using it. Oh my god, I'm a
Speaker 1: little I'm a little incredulous. I'm rubbing it on my
Speaker 1: This is like, I mean, it's this is weird. Been
Speaker 1: a while since I've been on this podcast, and I
Speaker 1: don't really know what we I thought Sam and I
Speaker 1: were going to come in and kind of like bring
Speaker 1: a kookie, fun energy and like to slept things. But
Speaker 1: I did not expect to be the conservative one. No,
Speaker 1: I'm like, I'm like, everyone stopped. This feels so great.
Speaker 1: I actually, you know, I'm gonna break character and say
Speaker 1: I don't you're making uncomfortable. Yeah, that's not breaking character
Speaker 1: for you, prude ass. Oh my god, stop where this
Speaker 1: is all going? This is all escalating too quickly. Okay,
Speaker 1: everyone feels prude. This unbelievable. It feels amazing. You know
Speaker 1: he's just doing the you're just this issing. Okay, wait,
Speaker 1: here's what you guys, love my balls. Every single one
Speaker 1: of you thought about picked in every way what I said.
Speaker 1: As much as this product seems perfect in every way,
Speaker 1: and I would love it if you sent me some
Speaker 1: so I can also try it in the privacy of
Speaker 1: my own home, I still happen to think this is
Speaker 1: inappropriate for the podcast. Here's what I will say. I
Speaker 1: am anti deodorant in general, and the thing we need
Speaker 1: is more deodorant. I don't need to be deodorizing other
Speaker 1: parts of my body. I can't even deorize what I have,
Speaker 1: and I don't want to. Why are you? Why are
Speaker 1: you this? Because because I think it's fine, Like it
Speaker 1: doesn't smell that bad, it's fine. I'm gonna use the toner.
Speaker 1: This is an area where I disagree with Sam, because
Speaker 1: I if I don't wear deodorant, I smell so bad
Speaker 1: within truly like thirty minutes. But it's it's Sam is
Speaker 1: like making this sort of rule that's not a rule,
Speaker 1: but say as being like I'm anti deodora because I
Speaker 1: like it when people smell bad, but it feels very
Speaker 1: sort of like it goes against respect, like sort of
Speaker 1: yes exactly, but yeah, but like I don't know that bad.
Speaker 1: I just want them to smell like plain, Like I
Speaker 1: don't like a lot of like sense. I like a
Speaker 1: man that smells really good. But if you just put
Speaker 1: on if you put on an inoffensive like you know,
Speaker 1: Arman Hammer deodorant, you smell more plain than if you
Speaker 1: don't put anything on them and smell bad. That's true,
Speaker 1: That's that's true. Like I'm not wearing a deodorant. That's
Speaker 1: like you know, uh, you know, are I don't know.
Speaker 1: I can't think of a single sent as an example
Speaker 1: if I'm being completely favored. When I'm like around, like
Speaker 1: you know, like professional things. I do wear deodorant because
Speaker 1: I don't want to be upsetting to people. But I
Speaker 1: don't really like when you're having sex with someone and
Speaker 1: like they're like down by your balls. I'll say it
Speaker 1: on this podcast if we're Howard's turning it like it's
Speaker 1: allowed to smell like has this dick out, and sometimes
Speaker 1: it should smell like balls because that smell is kind
Speaker 1: of hot. I don't know if I see my thing
Speaker 1: is just like I love the smell of men, like
Speaker 1: I love the smell of like dick, like I I
Speaker 1: like it, but but but not nasty dick like like
Speaker 1: it shouldn't be is nasty. All dick is nasty, sweetie.
Speaker 1: All dick is nasty and is nothing to say. I
Speaker 1: agree that I like it, absolutely speechless. I don't even
Speaker 1: like dick that much, to be honestly, I'll get real
Speaker 1: controversially here, like I don't love sucking dick. You've always
Speaker 1: said this, I love always. I heard Matt say he's
Speaker 1: not a huge fan of dick. Well, that's what I
Speaker 1: say every day when when I instead of hello in
Speaker 1: the game show writer's room, I say, not a huge
Speaker 1: fan of Dick. Still yeah, Sam and I or Matt
Speaker 1: n use me, we're coworkers. And he did walk in
Speaker 1: every day and say, guys had some Dick last night.
Speaker 1: Still not a fan? No, I just I don't know.
Speaker 1: I I like asked and asked, Oh, sorry, sorry, you
Speaker 1: don't like Dick. I don't like sucking dick. Really not
Speaker 1: really one of the weirdest gay guys I've ever met.
Speaker 1: I'm one of the weirdest gay guys. Wait, but you
Speaker 1: know who's gay? Bowen? Bowen loves Dick. Not really, I
Speaker 1: don't love I don't love sucking it either. I just
Speaker 1: want to say Sam and I both love Dick and
Speaker 1: alienating to the last culture, this community, so be it.
Speaker 1: I feel like this radio lab you're all being like like, oh,
Speaker 1: like I love like, Oh I'm gay like Oh, but
Speaker 1: I'm not like suit like I don't love Dick like
Speaker 1: yes you do. It's so true. It's it's so true.
Speaker 1: It's my it's my true experience. Like I'm gay, I
Speaker 1: like men sexually. Dick could take it to leave it
Speaker 1: like whenever I get like a cent to dick photo
Speaker 1: and was like, yeah, that's a dick. I'm never looking
Speaker 1: at a back to the ad, always trying to plug it.
Speaker 1: I do want to say that I'm really happy that
Speaker 1: I did use manscaped Revivor and toner um on my
Speaker 1: on my balls today. So did you use it on
Speaker 1: your balls? And you're shaft kind of like god everywhere? Okay,
Speaker 1: I see. I think it's pretty cool to sort of
Speaker 1: decentralize like male sexuality from sex organs. Does that make sense? Absolutely? Like,
Speaker 1: That's that's why I'm like, That's why I'm like, I
Speaker 1: don't I'm not obsessed with dick. It depends on the dick.
Speaker 1: But I'm not someone who's like, I got I got
Speaker 1: I gotta have dick every time. You know, I'm not
Speaker 1: is um. Yeah, I'm down for just yeah, general male sexuality,
Speaker 1: but I'm not going to say I don't also like dick.
Speaker 1: Oh baby girl. In my early twenties, when I was
Speaker 1: fratting my way around New York City, some of the
Speaker 1: best memories of my life, not just because it was easy,
Speaker 1: it was not painful. Nowadays, you know you're you hit,
Speaker 1: you get to your late twenties, you figure out sex
Speaker 1: all of a sudden. It's stuff in holes every single time.
Speaker 1: People gotta really figure it out. To be very still
Speaker 1: haven't figured it out? You haven't. I'm I'm I'm learning.
Speaker 1: I'm getting better every time I think. Yeah, I think so.
Speaker 1: But this is the thing, is that the four of us,
Speaker 1: I'm going to bring another element into this conversation. Oh
Speaker 1: my god, Oh my god. I don't. I don't know
Speaker 1: if I ever want to have sex with someone under
Speaker 1: the age of seven. Yeah, I'm not necessarily Yeah, just
Speaker 1: in college, no insects, Yeah, I must they like have
Speaker 1: like a Gallatin like situation where their own major sex degree,
Speaker 1: sex degree. I just want to say, I actually believe
Speaker 1: the opposite to be. I do not want to have
Speaker 1: sex with someone with a sex degree. Anyone who anyone
Speaker 1: who can anyone anyone who's like what, I just love
Speaker 1: sex and that's like your entire personality, or people who
Speaker 1: are like into the sex positivity movement, Like there was
Speaker 1: like when I was in college, there was like a
Speaker 1: sexual health Resource center where they just like gave you
Speaker 1: free condoms and then they wore like little buttons that
Speaker 1: said like p after sex and it was like some
Speaker 1: girl with blue hair and she was like comfortable. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I don't like that. In fact, I actually think oftentimes
Speaker 1: that is a sign that you are so repressed that
Speaker 1: the only way you can deal with sex is by
Speaker 1: being like bet being like, um, get ready for me
Speaker 1: to say this word. Are you ready? Are you ready?
Speaker 1: And it's like, that's your whole George, you have no
Speaker 1: holds bart against like sex health workers. No, it needs no.
Speaker 1: I love sex health workers. What I don't like is
Speaker 1: is girls with blue hair on college campuses who sell
Speaker 1: buttons that say, um, yeah, so what I'm a bottom?
Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, sure, sure, al right, everyone name I'm on
Speaker 1: my period and pregnant. But George, you know, to be fair,
Speaker 1: you are the prude in the room. So it's like,
Speaker 1: just feels a little biased coming from me. Let's let
Speaker 1: me just let me say something about my prudis. I
Speaker 1: have my reputation for being prudies because I was in
Speaker 1: the same relationship for most of my twenties, so I
Speaker 1: kind of didn't explore as much as many of my
Speaker 1: friends during that time. But that does not mean I'm not, uh,
Speaker 1: you know, incredibly horny all the time. Indiana Jones in
Speaker 1: the bedroom, hon wearing a hat. Yes, running from big
Speaker 1: old balls. Bring it back. What was this intervening period
Speaker 1: between these because I, let's just let's just sort of
Speaker 1: reveal if if that's okay, that you are currently in
Speaker 1: a relationship, and what was this intervening time between these
Speaker 1: two relationships? Like for you, were you a whore? No,
Speaker 1: that's the thing, and that is another It's like I
Speaker 1: was in this relationship then, No, okay, I was very
Speaker 1: like it was a difficult breakup kind of kept when
Speaker 1: he kind of kept hooking up for like you did.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, I've been there. Yes, we did, and
Speaker 1: that was and it was It's difficult for me. I
Speaker 1: think I'm better about it now, but I think it
Speaker 1: was difficult for me to separate emotions for sex. And
Speaker 1: I think and and I and I honestly think that, like,
Speaker 1: I mean, it was very serendipitous that I started dating
Speaker 1: my current boyfriend when I did, because I would say, like,
Speaker 1: it's not like I was looking for a relationship. I
Speaker 1: was like, it was the first I would say it
Speaker 1: had been a few months of me being very comfortable
Speaker 1: with being single. I had hooked up with a few
Speaker 1: people and but sometimes you meet someone and you really
Speaker 1: like them, and you and you say, and you say,
Speaker 1: you know what, I like this person? Um wait. Bowing
Speaker 1: to your point about not want to have sex with
Speaker 1: people before their twenty seven or something young people, I
Speaker 1: feel like I've always been like as you know, the
Speaker 1: James Gandolfini thing, I've had, like a daddy thing. I'm
Speaker 1: always like Daddy's older men. Please please, But I'm worried,
Speaker 1: thank you, what happens when, like, when I am forty,
Speaker 1: is it gonna flip? Like I want to say, I
Speaker 1: obviously at this point in my life don't want to
Speaker 1: sex some people like under the age of thirty. But
Speaker 1: will that change when I'm like forty? Will I what's
Speaker 1: gonna happen? It's hard for me to extrapolate for myself, definitely,
Speaker 1: but I want it. I'm generally going along the principle
Speaker 1: of I want to have sex with someone who is
Speaker 1: evenly matched with me when I feel like age is
Speaker 1: a big part of it in terms of experience. Yes,
Speaker 1: if I'm if I'm like fetishizing a young person when
Speaker 1: I'm forty, I'm fetishizing a twenty eight year old who's
Speaker 1: like mature for correct ye, So basically you you at forty,
Speaker 1: you want to suck you. Now, I'm not into I'm
Speaker 1: first of all, I'm not or I will never be
Speaker 1: into like a nineteen year old like that will never
Speaker 1: be and you shouldn't be right and and yes it's true,
Speaker 1: I shouldn't be as someone who was nineteen and lost
Speaker 1: a virginity. Sorry year old, it's not great psychotic I
Speaker 1: think that should be. Well, it's like it's good, and
Speaker 1: then like it's loaded. I feel like it's like we're
Speaker 1: loaded discussion because you're like, people have different experiences, people
Speaker 1: are different maturity levels. Sometimes you know, you know, people
Speaker 1: will be like, oh, anyway, it's psychotic or pop are
Speaker 1: like you know, if you're nineteen and you're dating someone
Speaker 1: who's twenty two that's grooming and you're like, well, you
Speaker 1: know not not not always, and but then sometimes you know,
Speaker 1: sometimes it can be and it's bad, you know what. Sexually,
Speaker 1: I'm really happy that at nineteen I first had sex
Speaker 1: with someone who was older and knew what they were doing.
Speaker 1: Relationship wise, it's weird, like when a nineteen year old
Speaker 1: is dating someone who's thirty, Like there's just there's unless
Speaker 1: unless everyone is like radically checking in with each other.
Speaker 1: It's weird, But sexually, I was thrilled to have sexually
Speaker 1: someone that the idea that I would when I was eighteen,
Speaker 1: Like when I was in college, I only hooked up
Speaker 1: with other people that went to my college. I the
Speaker 1: idea that I would have sex with someone older who's
Speaker 1: like I very much sought out older, like when I
Speaker 1: was twenty seven. But like when I was one, I
Speaker 1: was like hooking up with like a twenty eight year
Speaker 1: old and felt like that was enough of a jump.
Speaker 1: But I guess when it's like more, that's actually not
Speaker 1: that big of a jump. But it also is weird
Speaker 1: at the time. It is because I think you do
Speaker 1: so much maturing between the ages of twenty two and
Speaker 1: twenty six, you know what I mean, Like that like
Speaker 1: those twenties are like such a such a c change
Speaker 1: in your life that yes, I get thinking, like I'm
Speaker 1: twenty one and missed year old is a lot older.
Speaker 1: I remember when I was twenty one, I was like,
Speaker 1: it's sort of like hooking up on and off with
Speaker 1: someone who was twenty seven, and I would consider him
Speaker 1: old and he would always remind me that he was young.
Speaker 1: Well that's psychotic too. Yeah, yeah, well he's in jail now,
Speaker 1: well mine's in l as. It was no Jay Simpson
Speaker 1: miss him. Okay, let's take a quick break and did
Speaker 1: you buy back like George and Sam and we're back. Well,
Speaker 1: see this is funny because we don't do breaks on
Speaker 1: our podcast, you know, so when we unprofessionalson or you guys,
Speaker 1: do we even have sp We literally don't because we're
Speaker 1: like Rocket were independent d I y punk rock podcast.
Speaker 1: Bit I went on their podcast. They had me downloading
Speaker 1: that Google cast or whatever the funk it was. What
Speaker 1: was that caster? Yeah, zend caster more like zenda No,
Speaker 1: it's actually real culture number fifty z caster more like
Speaker 1: what does that even mean? Matthew? Yeah, So basically you
Speaker 1: are saying, um, okay, we're gonna take a break right now. Okay,
Speaker 1: we're back from our break. I mean I was so jarred.
Speaker 1: I just want everyone to know that's what's happening. That's
Speaker 1: what's happening, and there's there's snow computersing it to make
Speaker 1: it feel like there's a break. There was literally on
Speaker 1: a break. Let me tell you guys something. Here we go,
Speaker 1: here he goes. Me and match were a little glimpse space,
Speaker 1: be into your fucking future. Guess what we were, the
Speaker 1: scrappy little nobody's Anna Kendricks in the podcasting space too
Speaker 1: little gay boys. And now look at us, bitch, we're
Speaker 1: Julia Fox and Uncut Gems. What we are we are
Speaker 1: downtown it girls. And we don't need we don't need
Speaker 1: sponsors to make us right. It'll be past for our soul.
Speaker 1: We podcast because we love the arts. We're gonna Julia.
Speaker 1: Let me tell you something. Steven Soderberg reached after and said,
Speaker 1: I love you and Uncut Gems we don't have and
Speaker 1: and and she's doing that movie. Now what movie that
Speaker 1: just gonna announced? I got got announced today, I got
Speaker 1: annouced today. But I don't remember what it's called the
Speaker 1: words about, but it's got all these like be it's
Speaker 1: like these like I mean, everyone unfilmed, everyone who has
Speaker 1: a fucking letterbox account is coming their diapers to night.
Speaker 1: I don't think so, I don't think you. Thank you,
Speaker 1: thank you, thank you God. I'm so glad you can
Speaker 1: fucking agree for once. Oh my god, there was nothing
Speaker 1: worse than a self just like a self styled film person.
Speaker 1: But then you have like but then like certain people
Speaker 1: on Letterbox are like, you know you got your Like
Speaker 1: Harry knts, you write these like thirty three paragraph reviews.
Speaker 1: It's like, as Harry kne the last person I met
Speaker 1: before Lockdown started, Wow, how march ty guys went to
Speaker 1: the spot? It was the last I mean, and you
Speaker 1: know now that I'm saying it, it's like it was
Speaker 1: at a party. So maybe the order was such that
Speaker 1: I then met one more person after, but it was
Speaker 1: a party where I distinctly remember, like that one of
Speaker 1: the last people I spoke to was her, and I
Speaker 1: had never met her before, and it was like the
Speaker 1: last party I went to pre lockdown. Do you think
Speaker 1: she's sort of hopping around town going on interviews and
Speaker 1: being like, you know, the last person I met was
Speaker 1: actually George Severi's no. I think it had a much
Speaker 1: more profound effect on me than it had on her.
Speaker 1: I'll say she would never talked about someone, but I
Speaker 1: have to say it was. It was, And this is
Speaker 1: how I know she's a star. Someone who actually is
Speaker 1: a famous podcaster. I won't say who didn't recomb her, No,
Speaker 1: but you're honestly not far off some way. I didn't
Speaker 1: know she was and and and said, oh something. You know,
Speaker 1: she was with me, so maybe he was like, oh,
Speaker 1: are you a commune or something? And then she says
Speaker 1: the sentence I'm an actress. But it is the It
Speaker 1: was the best line reading I've ever seen anyone, just her,
Speaker 1: I'm an actress. I'm an actress. I'm an act Like, well,
Speaker 1: I'm an actress, and that there was so much there
Speaker 1: that was not that was in said. It was like
Speaker 1: a I'm an actress. B you are a fool for
Speaker 1: not knowing. Yeah, and see remember this, Yeah, should I
Speaker 1: start doing that? Should we all start doing that? I'm
Speaker 1: a podcaster like and I don't know. Well as it
Speaker 1: means we stay it with conviction. Bowen, are you? Are
Speaker 1: you nice to strangers? Um? No, No, he's he's actually
Speaker 1: I think i've been with Bowen when he's been recognizing
Speaker 1: he's very nice. He's very nice. But when but when
Speaker 1: someone crosses a line, Bowen will give them. I'm very
Speaker 1: I'm very sensible and judicious about who I am rude
Speaker 1: to because it is like it takes it takes an
Speaker 1: effort for me to flip a switch and be like,
Speaker 1: I'm going to be rude to this person. Because they
Speaker 1: deserve it, because they justifiably should. I should make them
Speaker 1: feel bad, like if you ever met Ramona Singer, like
Speaker 1: if I ever met Remona singer. Um, everyone tune in
Speaker 1: to watch what Happens live. I was a little awkward
Speaker 1: because there's a little bit of lag when they do
Speaker 1: it on on Skype now, but it was very fun. Um.
Speaker 1: I don't know if they cut it out. I called
Speaker 1: Remota singer or White Supremacies in front of Andy Cohen. Okay, sorry, sorry, George,
Speaker 1: we're gonna say no. I I the last time, well
Speaker 1: one of the last times, when and I were together,
Speaker 1: we both both Boone and I don't no longer smoke cigarettes,
Speaker 1: but we really wanted one, and and Boone went and
Speaker 1: bought a pack, and someone approached him, you know, regardless
Speaker 1: of all of this, and and said hi and everything.
Speaker 1: And then as we were on our way out, he
Speaker 1: gave the rest of the pack to that person. Oh
Speaker 1: but that's because I. That was self preserving, because I
Speaker 1: was like, I don't I shouldn't spoke. It was because
Speaker 1: you're generous, Matt. Now that you're a big HBO Max star,
Speaker 1: are you gonna be nice? Are you gonna be mean.
Speaker 1: Are you gonna be always nice? I'm always too nice?
Speaker 1: Does it get you in trouble? Uh m, I'll say
Speaker 1: this no, Okay, so there's no there's there's no excuse
Speaker 1: to not be very kind. Well, I'm no, I don't
Speaker 1: know no one ever, no one, no one going as
Speaker 1: me ever. Also, like I also like I have no
Speaker 1: concept of you know what in New York sometimes in
Speaker 1: l A never because who cares? Well in l A
Speaker 1: people are less likely to say something I think, yeah,
Speaker 1: because true, I don't know, because if I'm if I'm there,
Speaker 1: then like probably like Kristen Bell is a foot away, well,
Speaker 1: you're always a foot away from Kristin Bell. Well, Kristin
Speaker 1: and I are very close and so basically we're always
Speaker 1: going over ware together and so whenever, whenever I'm out,
Speaker 1: like people always like Kristen, oh my, got it to you.
Speaker 1: And she's always kind of like you're taking the front
Speaker 1: of that. But what I mean, what I mean is
Speaker 1: she always says, have you met Matt? She's so nice
Speaker 1: and um no, but apparently Angelina Jolie goes to my Gelson's.
Speaker 1: It's a supermarket chain in Los Angeles. Yeah, but like
Speaker 1: that's what I mean, It's like there's like huge stars everywhere,
Speaker 1: like I know, like I don't know, I can't say that,
Speaker 1: but like literally, like Greta was just here. I was
Speaker 1: helping her with a self tape and she like was like,
Speaker 1: guess who my friend is on a date with right now,
Speaker 1: And she said the name of a huge celebrity, and
Speaker 1: I was like, that's insane that that can just happen.
Speaker 1: Someone I know was consistently fucking that's that's that's great,
Speaker 1: that's hot. Love that I'll say that the person that's
Speaker 1: on the date with this kid right now that well,
Speaker 1: I mean, listen, that's I'm sorry to say a little
Speaker 1: little oh heth there. We were all there, that we
Speaker 1: were all there that night. Yeah, he rolled to this
Speaker 1: party with these little twenty three year old twins. And
Speaker 1: if he were on this podcast, he would not be
Speaker 1: saying I'm never gonna have sex with someone under seven.
Speaker 1: He'd be saying, I'm cly hooking up with twenty three
Speaker 1: year old twinks. Yeah, if he was on here. If
Speaker 1: he was on here and then you guys said, you know,
Speaker 1: I don't want to have sex I went under twenty seven,
Speaker 1: there would be suddenly radio silence, and then it will
Speaker 1: be be ye. He would he would turn a little
Speaker 1: bit of a little bright shade of beat red and
Speaker 1: he would say. I would say, this is not a
Speaker 1: medium for him. No, no, but I mean I unlike
Speaker 1: George severies. Once Matt would put the ball deodorant on
Speaker 1: his testicles, this person would be like, yes, please. Well,
Speaker 1: the reason that George reacted in the sort of adverse
Speaker 1: way that he did is because he secretly was very
Speaker 1: into it. He loves my balls that George. You have
Speaker 1: to tell me if that's true. I mean, listen, Matt
Speaker 1: and I have a history, okay, and George and I
Speaker 1: have a history. But well, well George and I have
Speaker 1: have an unsort of it. It's just our our paths
Speaker 1: never crossed. Well, no, I think it's the same with Matt.
Speaker 1: I mean I think it was longer with Matt. It
Speaker 1: was one magical weekend when we were both in Canada
Speaker 1: and and we both told the same producer that we
Speaker 1: wanted to hook up with hook Year and then with Bowen.
Speaker 1: It was I had I had like a sustained crush.
Speaker 1: Sustained Well, no, I don't listen. It was like you
Speaker 1: know what it was all revealed one night when we
Speaker 1: went to this party and then like we were both
Speaker 1: dunk enough that we were just like we were just like,
Speaker 1: oh yeah, like I had a crush on you, like
Speaker 1: when I first right, and then it was very it
Speaker 1: was we very quickly were like oh yeah, me too,
Speaker 1: like we're like, okay, that's fun. It felt very sad.
Speaker 1: I mean, it was a long time ago. It was
Speaker 1: also just like it's it's weird to think about it
Speaker 1: now because it was I it was like when we
Speaker 1: first met and you were very charming and you still are,
Speaker 1: and it was you know, it was like during the
Speaker 1: time that I was going through that famous breakup. Mmm,
Speaker 1: but see, maybe you weren't really available. I would say
Speaker 1: that it is very true. I would actually she was
Speaker 1: not emotionally me not making I would say, me like
Speaker 1: not doing anything about that crush. If I'm being generous
Speaker 1: with myself, was both about me and also like out
Speaker 1: of respect to you, because it would not I mean,
Speaker 1: I was not right, you know, it would not have
Speaker 1: been cute and thank you? What about Matt? What about
Speaker 1: with Matt? That was just like a magical weekend um
Speaker 1: sort of like before before Sunrise kind of thing. But
Speaker 1: it was we met in the car on the way
Speaker 1: we're getting off the plane at JFL, and I immediately, immediately,
Speaker 1: you know, he was gay and I was gay too.
Speaker 1: I immediately knew I was gay, and I thought came out.
Speaker 1: That was like came out that weekend. It was a
Speaker 1: huge weekend for me. Um and no. But we both
Speaker 1: said to the one of the producers at JFL, like,
Speaker 1: what's there, what's that person's deal? I do want to
Speaker 1: say I was very I mean, I wouldn't say very introverted,
Speaker 1: but I was kind of you know, this was I.
Speaker 1: You were much more shy then you than you were now. Yes,
Speaker 1: I was more shy. I hadn't moved to New York,
Speaker 1: get every the whole thing. It was my first big
Speaker 1: anything like literally before that. My comment, you know, the
Speaker 1: things I had done were like comedy festivals in you know, Austin,
Speaker 1: you know, like the going on that week and that
Speaker 1: that that JFL weekend. There's always like a lot going on. Yes,
Speaker 1: there was a lot going on, and I was not.
Speaker 1: It never occurred to me that we could have hooked up. Well,
Speaker 1: you had a boyfriend, that's ride, and so did I.
Speaker 1: That's right. So was separate lives. Um, you know, I
Speaker 1: feel and I feel that you know, Bone is pretty
Speaker 1: public about his crush on Samuel. Oh, I mean, but
Speaker 1: we've this is this is again, this is like we
Speaker 1: talked about the broad gay as much as we talked
Speaker 1: about my unrequited feelings for Sam. But these are this,
Speaker 1: this is years ago. But I don't want to say
Speaker 1: the one pair that doesn't have any history is Sam
Speaker 1: and that we never really went there. Well, but also
Speaker 1: Sam and George, well yeah, what is our podcast rather
Speaker 1: rather than a long long edging process. Well that's really
Speaker 1: hot horror. Oh my god, that would be so crazy
Speaker 1: if the finale of Stradio Lab was you guys telling
Speaker 1: each other that you were in out of We're aggressive
Speaker 1: to each other the whole time. And then but Sam,
Speaker 1: why didn't you ever have a crush on me? Yes?
Speaker 1: Sam are type. Look, you're beautiful, you know that, But
Speaker 1: you're not my type. Yeah, I wouldn't. I wouldn't call
Speaker 1: myself a Samuel type. See Sam, Sam is one of
Speaker 1: these people, and I respect it so much in a way,
Speaker 1: whereas with other people, I'm like, oh that person is
Speaker 1: a type like that, their scope is so narrow. But
Speaker 1: with Sam, I'm like, it's such an it's such an
Speaker 1: aggressive stance on this is the only type of person
Speaker 1: I'm sexually attracted to, and anyone who does not check
Speaker 1: these boxes has no chances. Paid dust is paid dust.
Speaker 1: I think it's it's toxic and I wish it were
Speaker 1: not true. I think when like you meet like a
Speaker 1: straight guy who's like has a clear type, it's like,
Speaker 1: oh that is so bad. But I can't help it.
Speaker 1: And it's what I like. It's what it is. I
Speaker 1: get it. I've got very specific boxes. I get it.
Speaker 1: I mean, this is this is what a lot of
Speaker 1: people who are into bears are like. I think it's
Speaker 1: such a specific it's one of the only healthy Um.
Speaker 1: You know, I'm not preferences one of the only healthy fetishes.
Speaker 1: Am I am? I the only one here who doesn't
Speaker 1: think I don't have a type. Wait, sorry, I want
Speaker 1: to take back that I said one of the only
Speaker 1: healthy fetishes. All fetishes are healthy. I meant one of
Speaker 1: the only healthy, like you said, I think it's much
Speaker 1: I I feel much more safe with someone who says
Speaker 1: I like bears than with someone who's like, I like twins.
Speaker 1: It's like they feel like a hunter. I also tried
Speaker 1: when I was like young, I was like, I'm gonna
Speaker 1: try to date like like skinnies, because you say, like
Speaker 1: like bear men like people are I feel like my people.
Speaker 1: A lot of people, my people, A lot of people
Speaker 1: early twenties, like I was, are like of slimmer build
Speaker 1: and not of like bearish build, and that comes very
Speaker 1: easily to a forty something. And like I was trying
Speaker 1: to date people who were like twenty three and like skinny,
Speaker 1: and it was like not clicking at all. It just
Speaker 1: like was not hot at all. I get it. No, no, no,
Speaker 1: don't worry. I know I'm not offended anymore. But it
Speaker 1: took until today. And Matt, look look at it this way.
Speaker 1: You know you, in my eyes are twenty three and skinny.
Speaker 1: Thank you, that's huge. Thanks a k A disgusting trash uva.
Speaker 1: The square, the quadrant. We have not crossed swords. That's
Speaker 1: actually fine, and that's fine, and that's that's okay and
Speaker 1: that's healthy sometimes. Yeah, And I do think, you know,
Speaker 1: at this point it is too late I want to
Speaker 1: put out there. Let's just denormalize like gay men befriending
Speaker 1: guys they've hooked up with. Like, that's there, that's their
Speaker 1: way of making friend. I'm like, I've I don't do that.
Speaker 1: I have to three people I've done that with. And
Speaker 1: I'm like, and this is a weird like blurring of
Speaker 1: the lines to me already, where some seem seemed to
Speaker 1: have this as like a recruitment tool for or there's
Speaker 1: like groups of gay friends and they're like, oh, honey,
Speaker 1: we've all hooked up with you know, everyone's hooked up
Speaker 1: with everyone, remember summer oh eight. I'm can I want
Speaker 1: to I have a real I have a real thought
Speaker 1: about this though. Um I agree, it's like it doesn't
Speaker 1: need to be one way or the other. It's like
Speaker 1: friends or friends whatever. Um. I think that because when okay,
Speaker 1: this is kind of weird. My first friend that I
Speaker 1: ever made that was gay was also the person that
Speaker 1: I lost my virginity too. Therefore, I think that whenever
Speaker 1: I meet a gay person, it does go through the
Speaker 1: filter first of what do I feel for them sexually?
Speaker 1: And that's something that I have to like probably work
Speaker 1: out there. But like it is, I think like that
Speaker 1: first gay relationship that you have and the intricacies of
Speaker 1: that will sort of well, I'll pose the question to
Speaker 1: the group. Do you feel that the first gay experience
Speaker 1: that you had, whether this is a friend or a
Speaker 1: lover or whatever, has dictated if you were to look
Speaker 1: back on your sort of gay friendship life, anything about it. Oh,
Speaker 1: my my ship is too dark, So I'm not gonna
Speaker 1: I'm not gonna share. Um, I'm can wait say yes,
Speaker 1: well yeah, wait, what's what's the what's the what's the question?
Speaker 1: Question is? Is? Sorry? Go ahead, man, you probably can
Speaker 1: ask it better than me. Georgia a lot. No, no, no,
Speaker 1: and let me know if I understood it correctly. Has
Speaker 1: your first sexual experience influenced the way you probably any
Speaker 1: new meeting, any new gay man. Um, And I would
Speaker 1: say for me, I don't think so, because my my
Speaker 1: first sexual experience was like freshman year of college with
Speaker 1: someone I felt it was like way more experienced than
Speaker 1: I was, but was my age. He was like one
Speaker 1: of these people that had like been I mean, and
Speaker 1: you know, this is his story to tell, but had
Speaker 1: been like hooking up with older people through high school
Speaker 1: in a way that in my mind, from my perspective,
Speaker 1: seemed like he knew what he was doing. It did
Speaker 1: not seem like, you know, anything darker than that, But
Speaker 1: I mean, who am I to say? Um? But I
Speaker 1: felt like he was way more experienced but was very
Speaker 1: accepting of the fact that I wasn't and I didn't
Speaker 1: feel like inadequate in any way. Um, And in fact,
Speaker 1: that was probably one of the healthier It's like I
Speaker 1: had worse, way worse hookups like later in my life,
Speaker 1: but I think I was lucky that my first one
Speaker 1: was was good. But I would say, to your point, Matt,
Speaker 1: like I less so feel am I attracted this person
Speaker 1: than the opposite? Like, and when I meet someone, I'm like,
Speaker 1: are they do they find me hideous? Like? Do they are?
Speaker 1: What do they feel towards me? Oh? I relate to that. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I feel like it's hard for me to Like, I
Speaker 1: think part of my thing was like trying to date
Speaker 1: people who like there was like a closet. I was
Speaker 1: driven by closeted nous and so I was like, Okay,
Speaker 1: who does no one know? And like that kind of
Speaker 1: So I think I still it's hard for me to
Speaker 1: find friends attractive because like I'm like friends with them first,
Speaker 1: and that like the sexualizes it in a weird way,
Speaker 1: like not always is, but there's something about that if
Speaker 1: I were, if we're if we're doing fair on the pod,
Speaker 1: then and we and we are, there's something to that
Speaker 1: that guys are charging and you're out of new and
Speaker 1: well this is this is required for me and Bowen
Speaker 1: because the podcast is becoming a therapy. So this is
Speaker 1: this actually was required training. No, actually, okay, I was
Speaker 1: gonna say, I'm in therapy and Matt is sort of
Speaker 1: dragging his heels in terms of going to therapy, which
Speaker 1: I think he should go to like everyone else, you
Speaker 1: should go. But don't you think I'm doing an amazing
Speaker 1: job on myself. Have you ever done therapy? No? I haven't.
Speaker 1: You know what, Matt, I am actually thinking of stopping therapy.
Speaker 1: But but this is a point to therapy because I
Speaker 1: think it helped me so much in the year year
Speaker 1: to two two years that I've done it that I
Speaker 1: actually feel not to say that I'm fixed, but I
Speaker 1: actually think I'm okay now not having it for a
Speaker 1: period of time. Yeah, well, isn't that how it works? Well,
Speaker 1: it depends. I mean, there are people that you know
Speaker 1: consistently have isn't that a way it can work? I mean,
Speaker 1: I think that's the way to be honest, that was
Speaker 1: my goal with it. I because also it's a lot
Speaker 1: of money. I don't want to do it exactly. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I have a low deductible sweetie, so I'm in it. Well,
Speaker 1: you know, actually Bowen Yang did actually give me an
Speaker 1: ultimatum one time. He was like I told him I
Speaker 1: was very upset with him while he was smoking cigarettes,
Speaker 1: and I said he has to stop, and he said,
Speaker 1: I'll stop when you go to therapy. And it sounds like, well,
Speaker 1: it's not really a one to one, but I it
Speaker 1: is now. It's yeah, physical health, mental health. Yeah, is
Speaker 1: that what they said? Yes, these two Greek queens are
Speaker 1: informing yet horror um we are I know I want
Speaker 1: to go and honestly, can I ask you a question
Speaker 1: flat out and can you be honest to you? Bowen?
Speaker 1: Have you actually not been smoking cigarettes? Fallen off the
Speaker 1: wagon race? But when it? Because this is something I
Speaker 1: have been struggling with, Like it really is one of
Speaker 1: those things where you're like, oh my god, if I
Speaker 1: hadn't just like wanted to seem cool when I was sixteen.
Speaker 1: It is the one thing where like I'm not if
Speaker 1: I ever meet young people, I will not be in
Speaker 1: any other way like like, there's no I'm not gonna
Speaker 1: if I ever meet young people, I'm not gonna say
Speaker 1: anything about like school or what you should do or
Speaker 1: sex or drug. But it's like, just don't start smoking. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that's the one thing because it it's just it's so
Speaker 1: I'm currently doing nic Gum. I might just I hate.
Speaker 1: I don't think the nicotine things didn't work on me.
Speaker 1: I might just go to like hypnotis at this point, Yeah,
Speaker 1: over zoom do they work? I don't know. I think
Speaker 1: that that does work. And I think the n well,
Speaker 1: I think it worked for Pat like he was cigarettes.
Speaker 1: Literally that's actually he is real. Wow, we haven't had
Speaker 1: pad On in a fucking minute. Guy, we have to
Speaker 1: get her back. Um. I haven't checked in with her
Speaker 1: about her chewing um. But listen, whatever your vices, whatever
Speaker 1: your vices, I accept the three of you. Okay, okay, okay, okay, Um.
Speaker 1: It doesn't sound like you accept Bowen. No, I do.
Speaker 1: I accept him greatly. It hurts. It hurts. Okay. Also,
Speaker 1: I'll say this, I don't care as much now that
Speaker 1: we're in COVID times and like that the world is
Speaker 1: insane and trumps and based taxes whatever, It's just like
Speaker 1: I kind of don't really care if people are, you know,
Speaker 1: indulging the whatever. And if if Bone wants to smoke
Speaker 1: a cigarette to fucking feel more less stressed out, and
Speaker 1: I know that there's a lot going on if you
Speaker 1: wants to smoke a cigarette whatever, I'm not going to
Speaker 1: get on my fucking high horse and be like, don't
Speaker 1: smoke cigarettes because maybe it's making him feel better for
Speaker 1: a minute. I wish it wasn't the case, but I
Speaker 1: mean not good ultimately. No, you know that, and so
Speaker 1: you'll make your own decisions about it. But you know
Speaker 1: how I feel. Sam, what we're gonna say, um, it
Speaker 1: has the mood has passed, Um, but bring that mood.
Speaker 1: Bring back the mood. You were gonna talk about bottoming.
Speaker 1: You want to talk about how good it feels to
Speaker 1: have a penis in your butt that's really hard and
Speaker 1: it hits your hits your prostate. You know what thisants
Speaker 1: to be? That hard? Jesus, come on, make it a
Speaker 1: little soft, make it go easy for mecid pick. I
Speaker 1: don't like it when it's too hard. That's a little ouchy.
Speaker 1: George wants that penus very hard. I wanted to be hard. Listen,
Speaker 1: call me crazy, but I wanted to be erect Listen,
Speaker 1: George is a sex negative person that wants the dick hard.
Speaker 1: I chat it over this person that George has invented,
Speaker 1: which is a girl with blue hair, saying, absolutely you
Speaker 1: talking about I won you're talking about. I know, I know,
Speaker 1: I know. Her her name is Millie. Everyone knows what
Speaker 1: I'm talking about. Um, and she and tell you something
Speaker 1: else about And I know you are talking too much.
Speaker 1: And now that I recognize that, it's no longer a problem.
Speaker 1: No no, no, no, no, no no no. I had
Speaker 1: a huge crush on someone. This was my maybe sophomore
Speaker 1: junior year, who was one of the people that worked
Speaker 1: at the Sexual Health Resource Center, and so in order
Speaker 1: to literally have anything to talk about with him, because
Speaker 1: he was not, you know, the most interesting person. He's
Speaker 1: not a doctor. Um, I took this like one unit
Speaker 1: class us that they offered on like sexual health, even
Speaker 1: though I was I did not care at all, just
Speaker 1: to have something to talk about him. And this was
Speaker 1: a yearlong thing. And then it turns out he did
Speaker 1: not like me. So maybe that's where my sex negativity
Speaker 1: comes from. This girl with the blue hair that you
Speaker 1: have invented I think she if we're filling out this
Speaker 1: character a little, I also want to say she was
Speaker 1: in the theater group, but not the main one. She
Speaker 1: was in like the ultimative theater group that like put
Speaker 1: on shows in like the cafeteria as opposed to the theater. Yes, yes, exactly,
Speaker 1: like like like unauthorized, unauthorized colon Bye bye Birdie, and
Speaker 1: it's like a little it's like bye bye Birdie. But
Speaker 1: they say like they call each other like sluts and stuff.
Speaker 1: It's British and they call each other slags. The diffic
Speaker 1: thing with her is that she ultimately does not have
Speaker 1: any talents or interests, and so she's not She has
Speaker 1: landed on sex because it's something that's just provocative enough
Speaker 1: that it doesn't have to build on any other personality,
Speaker 1: you know, it's it's it's really about her father. Well sure,
Speaker 1: but so is like the theater, but she doesn't even
Speaker 1: have that. Theater is about her father. Yes, now I'm
Speaker 1: I'm I'm like, I'm feeling some I feel some empathy
Speaker 1: towards this girl, even though she's not real. Because as
Speaker 1: we said, we all we do all know this. I
Speaker 1: have nothing but empathy Well, the thing about this girl
Speaker 1: is that she is the girl who we were friends
Speaker 1: with in high school. But in college there were people
Speaker 1: that we could actually be friends with. We weren't friends
Speaker 1: with her anymore. She was a good ally, She was
Speaker 1: a great allig school. She was one of the only
Speaker 1: people that like was pro gay in the year like
Speaker 1: two thousand and six. She intrinsically knew you were literally
Speaker 1: had a friend like this, and her name was Nicky,
Speaker 1: and I remember he address. This is one thing I
Speaker 1: have to say about her. She was She was like
Speaker 1: my first friend who she told me that she was
Speaker 1: by and I allied and said that I was by.
Speaker 1: And this is truly like grade fifth grade. And I
Speaker 1: remember that her screen name nor her email was Gucci Nikki,
Speaker 1: like Gucci the brand, but it was spelled g o
Speaker 1: O c h y Nikki. I think that's like, I
Speaker 1: think that's like knowing that it's time. It's a really
Speaker 1: queer way to spell Gucci. That's and I also want
Speaker 1: to say about this girl that is in We are
Speaker 1: now in college with her and distancing ourselves from her.
Speaker 1: We are the villains in the in the story. We
Speaker 1: are yeah, we are bad because we get one ounce
Speaker 1: of like, well, actually I'm I know who I am
Speaker 1: now and we're out, like she was there by our
Speaker 1: sides when we were in need, and we immediately Yeah,
Speaker 1: we met one kind of cute gay guy named Tyler
Speaker 1: who was on his way out to a club, who
Speaker 1: had a fake I d for us, and we left Corey,
Speaker 1: Corey Nikki Millie in the dust. Okay, this is not
Speaker 1: quite This is just an analog, like a grown up
Speaker 1: analog in my own life only and no one else.
Speaker 1: So maybe you guys don't relate. But recently I have
Speaker 1: unfollowed people who I worked at a day job with,
Speaker 1: like specifically like the like boogie white women who like
Speaker 1: didn't really care if I lived or died or only
Speaker 1: like sort of like caught went like only like was
Speaker 1: aware that I existed, like once I didn't work there anymore.
Speaker 1: I feel like I feel like there's some like there's
Speaker 1: some analog to Corey here where I'm just like, oh,
Speaker 1: I don't you guys, like don't really like you guys
Speaker 1: aren't in my life anymore, and I don't need to
Speaker 1: see your trips to Maine and like I don't like
Speaker 1: that doesn't every trip to Maine is beautiful. Every every
Speaker 1: trip to Maine is beautiful. In these trying times, Maine
Speaker 1: is our only respite now more than ever. Maine Underdog.
Speaker 1: Title of app Underdog, that's that's not very often that
Speaker 1: you do you like something enough to be title of that,
Speaker 1: but not not quite enough to like make it so
Speaker 1: well well, people don't know what the readers don't know
Speaker 1: what home was. Whenever I say title of we then
Speaker 1: have our producers, our team, they go and they check,
Speaker 1: try to clear the title, and so it doesn't always.
Speaker 1: So it's fun. It's it's really important to have an
Speaker 1: underdog or an alternative because sometimes we can't always get clearance.
Speaker 1: I still remember that there was a title of for
Speaker 1: my episode that I thought was going to be the title,
Speaker 1: and then it wasn't and it was rhymes with Zendeia. Instead,
Speaker 1: it was my Big Fat Greek Culture, which I think
Speaker 1: is like a better title maybe for like a passerby
Speaker 1: of a podcast, but rhymes with Zendeia I think is
Speaker 1: much more in the voice of That's why on this
Speaker 1: episode it's more underdog. For title of EP is rhymes
Speaker 1: with Sendea yeah, And you know what, Zendia was the
Speaker 1: underdog at the Emmy's and she took home the statue
Speaker 1: beautiful to. One of my most toxic traits is I
Speaker 1: was kind of sad for Jennifer and is then for
Speaker 1: one second same toxic I think. Actually, I mean Szendia
Speaker 1: is like technically the underdog but likes as like the
Speaker 1: cool one. Right now, it's like once me more than
Speaker 1: vin Ze. Yeah for Sandra. I know, I know I'm biased,
Speaker 1: but Sandra showed up on the Zoom shopped from Clapped
Speaker 1: Winds in Day oh one, wore like a beautiful like
Speaker 1: BLM jacket um in Korean and like she like just
Speaker 1: showed up and like was present, Like I I hope she.
Speaker 1: I hope she gets her gets her flowers someday from
Speaker 1: the damn Television Academy. Yeah, you know. What I also
Speaker 1: thought was such a flex was like the celebrities who
Speaker 1: couldn't even bother to get on Zoomy, Like Meryl Streep
Speaker 1: was not getting on Zoom, Olivia Coleman was not getting
Speaker 1: on zoom, Laura Dern did not get on Zoom. Cape Blanchett,
Speaker 1: who was the star of Mrs America, did not get
Speaker 1: on zoom. They probably called a head and we're like
Speaker 1: We're gonna win, and they were like, no, girl, sure, sure, sure,
Speaker 1: so don't waste Cape Lunchets time. Cape Planchett is not
Speaker 1: going to get on the zoom and lose. Who beat
Speaker 1: Cape Blanchet, Miss Regina, Oh well that makes sense, you
Speaker 1: know what. This is the one thing I'll say about
Speaker 1: the end. I think the fact that the three things
Speaker 1: that one big Watchman, ships, creak, and succession like, regardless
Speaker 1: of my personal feelings, I think all three of them
Speaker 1: capture something about the moment, and I think they were
Speaker 1: the right, the correct winners, despite the fact that there
Speaker 1: are certain people I'm sad lost. I think, you know,
Speaker 1: was the ship's creek sweep a bit much? Sure, but
Speaker 1: I actually think it makes sense that those are the
Speaker 1: three big winners. George, that was such a tasteful take,
Speaker 1: such a positive you know, sort of just sort of
Speaker 1: you know, it's I'm happy to be here and I'm
Speaker 1: I'm happy to see everyone else succeeding. I love that
Speaker 1: from you can I can I sar something out there
Speaker 1: while he was saying it, he looked so beautiful. He
Speaker 1: looks so beautiful while he was beautiful. I always look
Speaker 1: more beautiful when i'm being um positive. Yeah, looks incredible
Speaker 1: on you. Thank you. Enjoy it while it lasts bit ugly. Now,
Speaker 1: it's crazy you went from stunning icon to wore ugly
Speaker 1: in a second. That's my my comedy album is stunning
Speaker 1: icon to or ugly devolves over the course of an hour.
Speaker 1: Stunning icon to hore ugly is the that's like, it's
Speaker 1: a yeah, it's from Justin to Kelly. I guess that
Speaker 1: movie was about texting. Do you ever think about what
Speaker 1: I've never seen it. You've never seen it, I've never
Speaker 1: seen an I've never seen anither. But I believe you
Speaker 1: when you say that it's about stunning icons. Well, that's
Speaker 1: what I believe. Literally, that's what the movie was. It
Speaker 1: was from Justin to Kelly, like they would text each other,
Speaker 1: and that's the whole the whole crux of the movie
Speaker 1: is the bitchy blonde friend who like of course was
Speaker 1: me and because she was well basically yes, she like
Speaker 1: somehow gets one of their phone and sends a text
Speaker 1: that's to fund them up, and they fall for it,
Speaker 1: and then she almost gets her way. That blonde bitch.
Speaker 1: That's actually a really solid premise. I'm gonna say amazing.
Speaker 1: I like the simplicity of Yeah, George, you're you're stunning
Speaker 1: this this this warm client take. You're stunning icon you
Speaker 1: you glow, Alison Brie, it's actually really culture number forty nine.
Speaker 1: You glow, you Glowrie. I think it's time for I
Speaker 1: don't think so, Honey, Why do you want to end?
Speaker 1: I know? I keep going, we king, I'm mostly kidding.
Speaker 1: You're supposed to write a sketch. Oh oh my goh
Speaker 1: my god, what's it gonna be pitched to us? Baby?
Speaker 1: You CB class can wait? Unbelievable. No one's taking his
Speaker 1: three on one. That Scotch. I would watch that Scotch.
Speaker 1: I would absolutely watch that. Joe Biden but he's gay?
Speaker 1: What what kind of things would he say? You think, George?
Speaker 1: He'd say, um, malarkey in my asshole? Sam? What would
Speaker 1: the second beat beat? That's the only beat I had,
Speaker 1: That's the only Joe Biden but I know is the malarkey?
Speaker 1: I think there's something like where um um, something about
Speaker 1: we have to do something with like doctor Jill, Like
Speaker 1: maybe she's like, I'm a doctor. That's how I can
Speaker 1: tell my husband's gay. He'd be like, yeah, I've got
Speaker 1: a stutter from sucking dick too much. Apparently you can
Speaker 1: get a stutter from that. Now. Yeah, he's like, I
Speaker 1: must be gay. I named my son Hunter. Oh oh
Speaker 1: my god, that old queen. What George picked queen? Yeah,
Speaker 1: from New York. And she comes in and I Rudolf
Speaker 1: comes in playing Kamala and she does a death drop
Speaker 1: and the lady Gaga comes in on zoom and says,
Speaker 1: live from New York. It's fineness, it's my city, New York.
Speaker 1: Live from New York. I want to say everyone from
Speaker 1: this what was the host? And she said, put your
Speaker 1: paws up for Charlie Pooth. I would stand, I would
Speaker 1: stand s t a n that for Charlie Pooth, but
Speaker 1: does have his pa. I'll tell you what. He's had
Speaker 1: his finger in his butt hole jacking off for Charlie Pooth.
Speaker 1: You do it for like a week. It was for
Speaker 1: the you know what. I was doing that too. You
Speaker 1: both had your fingers and your assholes natative. But now
Speaker 1: he's a little too like queer baby. You know what
Speaker 1: I don't know, like something about I've taken a turn
Speaker 1: off of Charlie Pooth Road. Yeah, road was actually right
Speaker 1: next to Abbey road. Yeah, I prefer him to that other,
Speaker 1: the Calvin Klein one with the Cabayo. You mean father
Speaker 1: first of all, first straight fucking father. That's you sound
Speaker 1: like straight And his name is Sean Don Mendece. Interesting.
Speaker 1: You forget the poc well iconic BIPOC people, people who
Speaker 1: say but phone nate the the letters b well BIPOC.
Speaker 1: I'm like, I think it was io a Debris on
Speaker 1: our podcast in fact, who said BIPOC is the all
Speaker 1: lives matter of acronyms. Yes, yes, absolutely, I think, so, honey,
Speaker 1: or what I think it's time? I have one? Do
Speaker 1: you have one? Matt? But it feels like you want
Speaker 1: to storm the floor and go first. No no, no,
Speaker 1: no no no, But I think we let's just stick
Speaker 1: to Okay, I have one. Okay, So this is our segment.
Speaker 1: I don't think so, honey. We take one minute to
Speaker 1: rail against something in culture. This is Matt Rodgers. I
Speaker 1: don't think so, honey. His time starts now. I don't
Speaker 1: think so, honey. Acres, what are you? How big are you?
Speaker 1: Stupid bitch acre? I have been told that. I'm like, oh, yes,
Speaker 1: I have this many acres of land? Fuck you? It's
Speaker 1: how many miles? Has it n how many feet? Because
Speaker 1: now we can talk, I understand how much feet is?
Speaker 1: What is acres? I don't think so, honey, that I know,
Speaker 1: and also not for nothing, But why are you talking
Speaker 1: like your old timey hon. It's the year of our
Speaker 1: lar two thousand twenty. We say feet, inches, yards meters.
Speaker 1: If you want to get Europe, listen acres No, I
Speaker 1: don't think so, honey, acres, I don't think so. Money
Speaker 1: just ribing how much quote unquote land you have? An acre's? Literally?
Speaker 1: What is an acre? Who can tell me? And also
Speaker 1: not for another but a c r. You don't have
Speaker 1: no alibi? You ugly. I can't even say this word.
Speaker 1: It's not sacred, it's acre. And also get out of
Speaker 1: that five second get out of here, acres more. If
Speaker 1: I'm saying that, I want to say acorn. Hello, and
Speaker 1: that's one. That's amazing, that's one of your best. Hell yeah,
Speaker 1: I don't get it. Does anyone know what an acre is?
Speaker 1: I guess you smart quote nquote smart people. I once
Speaker 1: lived on a farm and we said we live on
Speaker 1: It was on six acres, and I always I could
Speaker 1: visualize that, but I actually don't know how to was
Speaker 1: it a huge property? Like what it was pretty big?
Speaker 1: Actually yes? And I similarly, my grandfather before he passed
Speaker 1: in Greece, bought three acres like in the middle of
Speaker 1: nowhere and it was his dream, like he wanted to
Speaker 1: cultivate the land and that was And so I know
Speaker 1: what three acres looks like? Does an acre sound like?
Speaker 1: Doesn't that sound like a food? It sounds like a honey, Yes,
Speaker 1: it really, I'll get I'll get the apricot acre acre. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that sounds delicious, and someone like it's actually a cray.
Speaker 1: So so I just want to say, like, for once
Speaker 1: and for all, no one could tell me what an
Speaker 1: acre was not here. That's true, that's true. But I
Speaker 1: mean this is our urban bias and we're being very
Speaker 1: anti real America. Didn't you hear me say I lived
Speaker 1: on a farm? Well, Sam, you live in Wick. That's
Speaker 1: a good point. A smelly farm, shut up, my god,
Speaker 1: pig sty fucker pigs or smelly girl. Smell you're the
Speaker 1: smelly girl. You put stink all over your balls and
Speaker 1: not Oh yeah, I've heard of you. You smell like
Speaker 1: whole and you fuck when when you is disgusting. Mad.
Speaker 1: I wish you could all do a smell test now
Speaker 1: that you've been wearing your ball deodorant for thirty minutes,
Speaker 1: I just want to make it very clear that my
Speaker 1: pants are still completely off. Oh I've started, and I'm
Speaker 1: covering myself up with a blanket because you have to
Speaker 1: be kouth, but you know you have to be pooth
Speaker 1: more like mad. As you were standing there with no
Speaker 1: pants during this recording, which of our voices made you
Speaker 1: most hard? What pressed up against the throw and don't lie?
Speaker 1: We'll be able to tell. Yeah. Well, here's the thing.
Speaker 1: I feel like Bowen's voice I hear all the time,
Speaker 1: and so I'm sort of just like used to it sexually,
Speaker 1: you know what I mean. And you know the both
Speaker 1: of you have very sexual tones to your voice. But
Speaker 1: I do think I'm gonna I'm gonna go ahead and
Speaker 1: give it to Sam because we haven't explored that yet
Speaker 1: in our like, Oh that's so nice. We haven't tickled yet. Sam.
Speaker 1: You are making me the hardest is a challenge. Yeah, definitely,
Speaker 1: thank you for your support. However, I cannot reciprocate at
Speaker 1: this time. Okay, that's fine. Let me think this, um,
Speaker 1: this is Bowen Yang's I don't think so, honey, if
Speaker 1: you can believe it or not, and I can confirm
Speaker 1: that his, well, let me get my thing up. Okay,
Speaker 1: his time starts now. I don't think so, honey. Lady
Speaker 1: Gaga abandoning the concept of kindness punks after the release
Speaker 1: of Stupid. There was no call back to it at
Speaker 1: any point in the Chromatica release cycle, and we still
Speaker 1: have not heard one damn thing about what kind of
Speaker 1: kindness punks are and do or think. And I want
Speaker 1: to know more about kindness punks because I wanted to
Speaker 1: be one. When I first heard the term in this punk,
Speaker 1: I said, I want to be that. But now I
Speaker 1: don't know what that thing is. I don't know what
Speaker 1: that that is. And Lady Gaga, you have some defining
Speaker 1: to do instead of making all these videos about being
Speaker 1: hit by a car or something. Nine one one, your
Speaker 1: biggest enemy is you because you're not. No, your biggest
Speaker 1: enemy is me, Papa one, please patch the line. I
Speaker 1: think you need to explain what a kindness punk is
Speaker 1: because they're the people need to know more. It's what
Speaker 1: we need as a culture to be kindness punks. But again,
Speaker 1: who among you? This is like the Acre's question, who
Speaker 1: among who among you can tell me what a kindness
Speaker 1: punk in October? I need to know what it is
Speaker 1: because that's the only way we can heal. That's one minute.
Speaker 1: You know, while I agree, I had been waiting for
Speaker 1: Lady Gaga to explore the theme of trauma. You know,
Speaker 1: I feel like we haven't heard about that from her. Yeah,
Speaker 1: That's that was why I was excited to see the
Speaker 1: video because I just hadn't really heard her delve into that.
Speaker 1: But but I do just say, want, I appreciate you
Speaker 1: speaking truth to power, But I'm kind of was so
Speaker 1: thrilled that she didn't just keep saying kindness punks. I
Speaker 1: thought it was a smart move to be like, actually,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna go ahead and just leave that in the past.
Speaker 1: Sam stand. Sam is stand more so than any of
Speaker 1: the like stand Twitter accounts. Yeah, I'm a bigger I'm
Speaker 1: a bigger Gaga stand than Sam Is Like, Okay, fight,
Speaker 1: Oh my god, girls, go for it. Bo when you
Speaker 1: have dirty seconds Right now, I'm putting time on the
Speaker 1: clock to say why you were a bigger I think
Speaker 1: that Bowen literally wants needs to work. George. I don't
Speaker 1: need your opinion, I really and you looked at you
Speaker 1: look disgusting, honey, and you look ugly, poor, ugly. You
Speaker 1: look like an ugly whore when you said that. And
Speaker 1: you've looked pretty hot before before earlier, but now you
Speaker 1: look ugly. So stop anyway, one one acre, sixty square feet. Okay,
Speaker 1: that feels like we're not doing this. We need to move.
Speaker 1: I'm sorry. I was the premise to attack standwiches say
Speaker 1: little monster talk about how you are a bigger stand
Speaker 1: than Lady Gaga in relation to Sam go Okay, I
Speaker 1: was checking in on Gaga daily, the official Lady Gaga
Speaker 1: message boards every single day during the art pop era
Speaker 1: when people were not on board. I was with her
Speaker 1: when she was at her lowest, at her worst, and
Speaker 1: I was still standing and still engaging in the conversation, sweetie,
Speaker 1: So I will. I've been there for Gaga when she
Speaker 1: was at her lowest, I will be there for her
Speaker 1: when she is at her best. I watched the entire
Speaker 1: south By Southwest Kea where she where she was in
Speaker 1: a garbage bag and had white dreads. Sam is Sam
Speaker 1: is white? Okay, So now Sam, you now have to
Speaker 1: do the same thing towards Bowen. And remember that he
Speaker 1: called you white, so it might be wise to say
Speaker 1: something about his race. Bowen. I'm may not have been
Speaker 1: on the message boards, and I may not be the
Speaker 1: encyclopedia of Gaga knowledge that you are, but I have
Speaker 1: heart and isn't that what loving Gaga is all about?
Speaker 1: Because I have loved her since the beginning, and I
Speaker 1: don't I don't check the message boards. I'm not a
Speaker 1: researcher for Gaga daily. I am a fan and a
Speaker 1: stand and a standard is an emotional bond like one
Speaker 1: would have with the Lord who I believe in and
Speaker 1: who is Gaga? And my paws are up and you
Speaker 1: are white too? Yes, he is all right? Well, George,
Speaker 1: who won listen? Peress Hilton. I really I have to
Speaker 1: give it. I have to give it to my co
Speaker 1: host Sam Taggart, but I also have to say that
Speaker 1: I'm disappointed that he didn't bring up since Bowen brought
Speaker 1: up south By south West, Sam should have brought up
Speaker 1: the vomit artist that in fact accompanied Lady Gaga south
Speaker 1: Southwest and who is very important in stradio lab lore
Speaker 1: and we have discussed doing multiple include Bowen one, including
Speaker 1: my episode. We talked about her a lot and we
Speaker 1: all stand the vomit artist equally. So Sam won this round,
Speaker 1: but Bowen could always know that I had a crush
Speaker 1: on him for multiple weeks. Well that's a good opinion.
Speaker 1: That's why I asked for your opinion. And now I
Speaker 1: say so so that you were your opinion when you
Speaker 1: said that. All right, So now it's going to be
Speaker 1: time actually for Bowen. Who should go first? George should
Speaker 1: go first? George? Okay, I have I have a very
Speaker 1: I have an improv you one. Are you ready? Yeah,
Speaker 1: I'm very excited about that. Famed stand up George Savers
Speaker 1: doesn't improvily, I don't think remember that. Remember who's in
Speaker 1: the chat, famous improvisers Boone Yang and Sam Tiger. They
Speaker 1: were both on their teams. I heard of it. I
Speaker 1: have knocked out of the park every I don't think
Speaker 1: so I done. Okay, he really has for another for
Speaker 1: another grants here is George bars I don't think so.
Speaker 1: One of these time starts now, I don't think so. Honey, Instagram,
Speaker 1: I think we have all seen enough to Just to
Speaker 1: illustrate this, I'm going to improvise by going on Instagram
Speaker 1: on my phone right now and doing live commentary on
Speaker 1: each let's see sharing factually and accurate graphics about voting. Okay,
Speaker 1: let's see a gay person sharing a meme about Kim
Speaker 1: catrall stupid. Someone at the moment wearing a mask. It's
Speaker 1: Natalie Walker and she actually looks gorgeous. Oh, someone made
Speaker 1: a cartoon, but it's bad. A video on someone's fince
Speaker 1: to of them cooking. Why would you make an entirely
Speaker 1: new Instagram shade get her? Um? Okay, an advertisement for
Speaker 1: furniture I can afford design within reach? Where? Oh okay?
Speaker 1: Someone I don't like but got a writing job recently. Um,
Speaker 1: don't grab character video from It's really funny, but I'm
Speaker 1: not gonna do it now, and how much time do
Speaker 1: I have? And I just let say I don't think so. Honey, scientists,
Speaker 1: where's the vaccine? Oh my god, one you got hurt? Jade,
Speaker 1: you really did? And stuff found dead? Scientists found dead?
Speaker 1: Not found working hard enough, that's for sure. Well what
Speaker 1: I have to say? You really beautiful? You shut that down? Yeah,
Speaker 1: you know you're really You're really onto something there, George,
Speaker 1: Because who I buy a show of hands? Who feels
Speaker 1: good on Instagram? Me raise their hands. Let's move on
Speaker 1: to Sam, I have to go, oh my god, that's
Speaker 1: your opinion. Um, okay, so Sam Taggert, this is your
Speaker 1: like millions. I don't think so, honey. I feel and
Speaker 1: you sometimes do pull out like really real thinker. You
Speaker 1: know they're honestly, i'd say they're or miss welcome to
Speaker 1: the club. And his time starts now. I don't think so, honey.
Speaker 1: My big fat ass with its little little hole. It
Speaker 1: is for potential suitors. They see that big round, acre
Speaker 1: wide and they say, I'm gonna pick penis in that
Speaker 1: and and then when they try, oh baby, I say no,
Speaker 1: thank you, I actually can't. I'm actually really bad at that.
Speaker 1: Can we actually stop? I'm sorry? Can you make it?
Speaker 1: Tell for me? They say no, this is how sex works.
Speaker 1: It's a hard dick in a hole. And I just
Speaker 1: want to say this is some sort of mirage for men.
Speaker 1: It's it's cruel what I do to them. I present
Speaker 1: them with this luscious rump. They want to gobble it up,
Speaker 1: and yet they can't because the whole is too small.
Speaker 1: It's like those butterflies that precinct as predators with the
Speaker 1: big eyes, but mine presents something to look And then
Speaker 1: you actually learned that you can't and it's some sort
Speaker 1: of trick and trap and I am sorry, and I
Speaker 1: forgive you for trying. And that's one minute. Wow, I
Speaker 1: really relate. Do you have a small hole too? Oh? Yes,
Speaker 1: medically so you so, Sam, you have a small hole.
Speaker 1: But when you have a small hole, it's it's um,
Speaker 1: it's small. Medically, I don't know if I've gotten medically
Speaker 1: told that it's that's a small hole, but it feels
Speaker 1: I identify as having a small hole. Okay, And George,
Speaker 1: I would say, mine's average. Yeah, all right, all right,
Speaker 1: this has been um I would say electric. This was
Speaker 1: one of the most electric episodes. It was like serious
Speaker 1: for a little right, like kind of scary. I liked
Speaker 1: I liked them. I liked the sequencing of this episode
Speaker 1: where it started out, you know, fun. I brought a
Speaker 1: weird question in where I was like, I'm the Sam
Speaker 1: and George is the Mat and then we argued about
Speaker 1: that and then it got serious. But then it got
Speaker 1: it got really fun and giggly and cookie at the end.
Speaker 1: I don't remember it being serious. It was serious. It
Speaker 1: was really serious. It was very serious. Gas lighters, big time,
Speaker 1: doing anything to gain rous fiber and we were making
Speaker 1: blue hair and MAT's over here big time. Oh my god,
Speaker 1: there good doing anything to dead your I don't know
Speaker 1: that next word. This has been a wonderful episode of
Speaker 1: Las culture Stas. Please please reader, listen to Stradio Lab
Speaker 1: but one of the best podcasts. It makes us laugh.
Speaker 1: So it makes us laugh. So they are really doing
Speaker 1: the work, the good work of booking guests outside of
Speaker 1: the lost Culturistas the universe, and for that we thank them.
Speaker 1: And um, it really sort of expands my horizons as
Speaker 1: a listener. It taught them way too long to book us.
Speaker 1: That's not true, No, it did. Okay, it's true. For Matt,
Speaker 1: it's truer Mat. Okay. We close every we close every
Speaker 1: every episode of the song guess side time anything? Do
Speaker 1: we sing a lot? Yes? I'm bad at that one.
Speaker 1: Here here we go, No no, no, here I have
Speaker 1: a good one. Go. I was twenty three. Tell listen
Speaker 1: to more of that. This is the best Lady Gaga album.
Speaker 1: Joe A