WEBVTT - Strength In Rebirth feat. Massy Arias 0:00:00.280 --> 0:00:04.480 Los Angeles. Are you ready to confess? Because guess what 0:00:05.240 --> 0:00:08.479 we are going back on tour. That's right, La is 0:00:08.520 --> 0:00:11.520 our first stop on October twenty first at the tear 0:00:11.600 --> 0:00:15.320 Grand Ballroom. Doors open at six o'clock. Bring your homies, 0:00:15.640 --> 0:00:19.480 bring your girls, bring your partner, and bring those confessions 0:00:19.760 --> 0:00:21.920 because the night is going to be filled with naughty 0:00:21.960 --> 0:00:24.440 little secrets. And you know how we turn up at 0:00:24.440 --> 0:00:27.440 a Good Mom show, So I cannot wait to see you. 0:00:27.520 --> 0:00:30.360 That's October twenty first at the tear a Gram Ballroom. 0:00:30.560 --> 0:00:33.080 Click the link in this episode description and get your 0:00:33.080 --> 0:00:36.880 tickets today. If you're not aware of who you are 0:00:37.120 --> 0:00:39.920 and really just taking care of yourself, you can easily 0:00:39.960 --> 0:00:40.760 be told anything. 0:00:41.360 --> 0:00:44.640 And what's funny is because it's cultural too in our culture, 0:00:44.680 --> 0:00:49.479 blacks and browns or kurvy. This is whybbl's are very popular, 0:00:49.600 --> 0:00:51.800 not popular, right, But at the end of the day, 0:00:51.840 --> 0:00:54.520 it's not the bl that's going to maintain a family together. 0:00:54.960 --> 0:00:55.200 Right. 0:00:55.440 --> 0:00:57.200 You can have all the surgeries in the world and 0:00:57.240 --> 0:01:00.280 have the nicest body in the world is you. It's 0:01:00.440 --> 0:01:02.160 how you show up for yourself. 0:01:24.600 --> 0:01:27.400 Welcome back to Good Mom's Bad Choices. I'm Erica and 0:01:27.440 --> 0:01:31.200 I'm Meila, Happy Wednesday, Happy Hemp Day. 0:01:31.280 --> 0:01:32.160 Yeah, how you doing? 0:01:32.840 --> 0:01:35.000 I feel good. I drink coffee so I feel energized. 0:01:35.040 --> 0:01:37.440 Oh how is that with this burst of the energy 0:01:37.520 --> 0:01:37.759 is coming? 0:01:37.760 --> 0:01:39.360 I haven't had coffee in two days, and this is 0:01:39.400 --> 0:01:39.960 what happens. 0:01:40.319 --> 0:01:42.200 How come we haven't had coffee in two days? We 0:01:42.240 --> 0:01:44.200 were in like the coffee land. I don't know, I 0:01:44.240 --> 0:01:46.000 just didn't get to it. Oh okay, I didn't have 0:01:46.040 --> 0:01:48.000 the coffee that I wanted, which is really irritating. But 0:01:49.120 --> 0:01:52.240 we just got back from Miami like moments ago. I 0:01:52.320 --> 0:01:56.680 literally slept for like fucking like twelve hours. 0:01:57.240 --> 0:01:58.960 We needed it bad. 0:02:00.480 --> 0:02:01.880 I know we say this every time we go out 0:02:01.880 --> 0:02:05.720 of town, but I'm not a party girl anymore. I 0:02:05.760 --> 0:02:08.120 don't know. I think I've graduated out of it. It's taken. 0:02:08.200 --> 0:02:09.200 It takes a lot out of me. 0:02:09.760 --> 0:02:12.720 We went to Miami for like a week and it 0:02:12.840 --> 0:02:14.760 was our friend cash Lee's birthday. 0:02:15.240 --> 0:02:17.160 We were into the house and a yacht. I mean, 0:02:17.200 --> 0:02:18.480 did all the Miami things. 0:02:18.520 --> 0:02:23.919 We wore like nighttime sunglasses every day, which is obviously 0:02:24.080 --> 0:02:28.600 the definition of Miami. Little outfits, sparkles and nighttime sunglasses. 0:02:30.520 --> 0:02:32.400 It's true, but I think I'm gonna start being like 0:02:32.440 --> 0:02:35.080 Amber Rose and wear sunglasses at night. Oh me too. 0:02:35.120 --> 0:02:36.000 I think it's the thing now. 0:02:36.240 --> 0:02:37.799 They have to be like a little translusings. I don't 0:02:37.840 --> 0:02:38.959 like to feel like I can't seek it because I 0:02:38.960 --> 0:02:39.560 already can't seek. 0:02:39.600 --> 0:02:41.200 Sometimes you got to commit, because I've done that. I 0:02:41.280 --> 0:02:43.680 wear the black at night and it's a look, and 0:02:43.720 --> 0:02:45.160 I have to commit to it and be blind. 0:02:45.320 --> 0:02:48.919 My eyesight's not not high enough for me to an additional. 0:02:49.160 --> 0:02:50.640 Additionally, put on dark glasses. 0:02:50.639 --> 0:02:52.400 They have to be like light or else I'll be 0:02:52.440 --> 0:02:55.760 bumping into things, plus drinking and hell no, they're like, 0:02:55.760 --> 0:03:01.520 where's that blind mice going? Where's my friends have seen? 0:03:01.560 --> 0:03:02.080 These people? 0:03:03.200 --> 0:03:04.280 Can't take off my glasses. 0:03:04.520 --> 0:03:08.160 I'm committed to looking like Amber Today we went to 0:03:08.200 --> 0:03:11.280 the what was the African Afro Nation? 0:03:11.360 --> 0:03:14.080 We went to the Afro Nation concert, went to. 0:03:14.000 --> 0:03:16.919 The beach dinners. 0:03:17.000 --> 0:03:17.880 We went to dinners. 0:03:17.919 --> 0:03:19.960 We went to Kei Key on the River or yeah, 0:03:20.000 --> 0:03:22.520 we went to fucking the strip club. One thing we're 0:03:22.520 --> 0:03:24.079 gonna do is we're going to do the things and 0:03:24.200 --> 0:03:26.519 oh we had a book signing. How the fuck do 0:03:26.600 --> 0:03:28.880 we do all this? Every time we goes, we're like, 0:03:28.880 --> 0:03:31.280 we're gonna relax. We're gonna be so relaxful and then 0:03:31.360 --> 0:03:33.320 we do four thousand things. But we had a really 0:03:33.360 --> 0:03:36.120 beautiful book signing in Miami. We have a really bomb 0:03:36.160 --> 0:03:39.160 ash tribe in Miami that I didn't realize that we had. 0:03:39.520 --> 0:03:42.480 Shout out to Nikki who took care of us and 0:03:42.520 --> 0:03:45.680 hosted us and supported us so much in making this happen. 0:03:46.080 --> 0:03:48.520 She was like, I'm here to support you. We're doing this, and. 0:03:48.480 --> 0:03:51.560 I'm really grateful that you made us do this and 0:03:51.760 --> 0:03:54.560 not made us, but encouraged us to have a book 0:03:54.560 --> 0:03:58.880 signing in Miami and brought out your community work at. 0:03:58.720 --> 0:04:00.320 Moms Miami is the shit. 0:04:00.960 --> 0:04:03.760 And just shout out to all the women and moms 0:04:03.760 --> 0:04:08.120 that came out to support us, and Mom Juice for 0:04:08.320 --> 0:04:12.080 supplying the wines because everybody knows moms love wine. 0:04:12.400 --> 0:04:14.920 I love the name Mom Juice. It's like the perfect wine. 0:04:14.960 --> 0:04:16.840 If I was gonna have a wine company, it would 0:04:16.880 --> 0:04:20.360 be called mom Juice or like mom Mama Juice. Or 0:04:20.560 --> 0:04:22.359 I can make some calls and so we can do 0:04:23.120 --> 0:04:25.880 good bad juice, good good bad wine, good wine. That 0:04:25.960 --> 0:04:26.560 is good wine. 0:04:26.600 --> 0:04:27.800 How good is everything? And our thing? 0:04:28.800 --> 0:04:31.159 So I mean, it was just lovely. It was lovely 0:04:31.200 --> 0:04:33.440 and thank you Nikki. You did, you did did the 0:04:33.520 --> 0:04:35.560 thing and make sure you guys go follow. Thank you Nikki. 0:04:35.760 --> 0:04:38.200 And I see why she's a doula And is that 0:04:38.200 --> 0:04:41.680 her Instagram thing? Thank you Nikki, so so appropriate. Yeah, 0:04:41.800 --> 0:04:44.760 she's a She's a black doula in Miami. And like, 0:04:45.560 --> 0:04:47.560 if I have a doula and I lived in Miami, 0:04:47.640 --> 0:04:50.800 NII would be my doula. Literally, Like she's the most compassionate, 0:04:51.360 --> 0:04:52.960 Like she just fucking cares. 0:04:53.160 --> 0:04:54.839 I don't even care that she's in Miami. When I 0:04:54.839 --> 0:04:56.680 get pregnant, her ass is coming to La. 0:04:56.800 --> 0:04:58.680 Okay, well we gotta get the same time so that 0:04:58.680 --> 0:05:00.560 we can just make it work. 0:05:00.600 --> 0:05:01.279 At one point, you. 0:05:01.279 --> 0:05:03.120 Know, we could just like pay for one fling. That's 0:05:03.120 --> 0:05:07.839 a good idea. Yeah, it's a good idea. We're really 0:05:07.880 --> 0:05:12.720 share a duela in a midwife and hold hands and push. 0:05:12.880 --> 0:05:17.280 That'd be beautiful. Did you enjoy your trip, my love? 0:05:17.360 --> 0:05:19.080 I did enjoy my trip. I had a great time. 0:05:19.120 --> 0:05:20.679 I've got to hang out with my friends. I realize 0:05:20.720 --> 0:05:22.839 how lucky I am. Always realize how lucky I am. 0:05:22.880 --> 0:05:25.479 But I have such an amazing group of friends and tribe, 0:05:25.520 --> 0:05:28.800 and that we just are all fucking nuts, and but 0:05:28.920 --> 0:05:31.160 we accept our nutsness and we love each other and 0:05:31.200 --> 0:05:33.719 we'd always no matter how annoying we are to one another, 0:05:33.760 --> 0:05:35.800 and we bicker and shit, we just get over it, 0:05:35.800 --> 0:05:39.280 we get past it, and that's that. 0:05:38.920 --> 0:05:39.320 That's true. 0:05:39.320 --> 0:05:41.200 We have a very unique friend group of friends, as 0:05:41.240 --> 0:05:44.840 you can imagine, very unique, very unique couple. And so 0:05:45.440 --> 0:05:51.000 the friends that embrace us are legitimately crazy and it's wonderful. 0:05:51.520 --> 0:05:54.520 And this weekend we had like a new two new 0:05:54.520 --> 0:05:57.400 people in the group because people got some new bows 0:05:57.960 --> 0:06:02.800 bows bows like what you never heard bo oh b 0:06:02.920 --> 0:06:05.719 e a U yeah, wow, wow, that's you're taking it. 0:06:05.760 --> 0:06:07.560 You're a real author these days, my love. 0:06:07.760 --> 0:06:11.680 It sounds very aw three anyway, that base not to 0:06:11.720 --> 0:06:13.919 be confused with bases or booze, but bos. 0:06:13.640 --> 0:06:18.680 They're the same, all of the same synonyms. And I 0:06:18.720 --> 0:06:20.359 was really concerned if they're going to be able to, 0:06:20.760 --> 0:06:23.400 you know, just slide in and not be alarmed at 0:06:23.440 --> 0:06:26.839 you know, the a'mount of titties pussy popping and you 0:06:26.880 --> 0:06:30.599 know it's working. That happened and everyone seemed fine, So 0:06:30.680 --> 0:06:31.760 it was it was really nice. 0:06:31.960 --> 0:06:32.120 Oh. 0:06:32.160 --> 0:06:35.919 Also side note, I got to meet my internet crush 0:06:36.160 --> 0:06:37.000 Derek to Grace. 0:06:37.839 --> 0:06:40.480 It's not his name. I looked on his Instagram, but 0:06:40.480 --> 0:06:43.720 it's not. He changed it Derek Grace too. What was 0:06:43.760 --> 0:06:46.240 it two before? I think so, unless I've been saying 0:06:46.240 --> 0:06:47.960 it wrong. But everybody did get to meet him, and 0:06:48.000 --> 0:06:51.080 the joy and the excitement. At first of all, I 0:06:51.120 --> 0:06:53.120 was like brain dead and I was watching Jamila and 0:06:53.160 --> 0:06:54.320 she said, so tell me. 0:06:55.240 --> 0:06:57.480 I was like, bitch, you know your nigga's sitting right here. 0:06:57.440 --> 0:07:02.200 Right I know, I have some things to ask. She 0:07:02.440 --> 0:07:05.280 was so excited, she was. She was like a kid 0:07:05.320 --> 0:07:07.679 at a candy store. I was like, he was fairly talking. 0:07:08.000 --> 0:07:10.400 He was, I mean, he was his woman was doing 0:07:10.400 --> 0:07:13.400 a lot of talking. But I was just like watching you. 0:07:13.560 --> 0:07:15.120 Was like, I was like, Wow, I'm so glad that 0:07:15.360 --> 0:07:17.680 you're here because I have I'm tired a whole lot 0:07:17.720 --> 0:07:18.000 to say. 0:07:18.080 --> 0:07:19.560 Well, the thing is, we were supposed to do a 0:07:19.560 --> 0:07:23.280 podcast with him. The bitch ass studio fucked up our slot, 0:07:23.360 --> 0:07:25.360 and so I was like, we have to make this happen. 0:07:25.480 --> 0:07:27.280 He first of all, he drove four hours to come see 0:07:27.360 --> 0:07:29.040 us to do the podcast that we didn't get to 0:07:29.080 --> 0:07:30.960 fucking do. And so I was like, we're going to 0:07:30.960 --> 0:07:33.080 breakfast and then I text Erica like, get your fucking 0:07:33.120 --> 0:07:34.920 ass up, because it's gonna be weird if I just go, 0:07:36.120 --> 0:07:39.559 come with me, bring your naggad, we're going. 0:07:40.040 --> 0:07:42.480 And we did, and he was very nice, very nice. Man. 0:07:42.480 --> 0:07:45.360 I'm already talking about we're gonna go out there and 0:07:45.840 --> 0:07:46.760 we're gonna make a vlog. 0:07:47.440 --> 0:07:49.880 Oh yeah, what are you sidebarring with him? Yeah? 0:07:49.880 --> 0:07:50.960 Wow, and we're vlogging. 0:07:51.120 --> 0:07:52.960 We're gonna do a vlog and we're gonna shoot guns 0:07:52.960 --> 0:07:54.400 and take mushrooms and do fun things. 0:07:54.800 --> 0:07:59.320 Okay, okay, cool sounds great on compound, on the compound. 0:07:59.840 --> 0:08:03.120 So yeah, we had a really fun filled week in Miami. 0:08:02.720 --> 0:08:04.320 And did a lot, a lot of a lot of 0:08:04.320 --> 0:08:08.040 a lot of things, and yeah, I'm grateful every you know, 0:08:08.440 --> 0:08:10.840 we did an interview with someone from the Stacks podcast 0:08:10.880 --> 0:08:14.760 and she said, you guys live juicy lives, and you 0:08:14.840 --> 0:08:17.560 know what, no word has ever been truer. We live 0:08:17.680 --> 0:08:20.800 some juicy fucking lives. We do a lot of fun shit, 0:08:20.880 --> 0:08:24.120 and I'm very grateful. I'm an adventurer, so my life 0:08:24.160 --> 0:08:26.440 is panning out exactly how I wished it to be. 0:08:26.520 --> 0:08:27.000 Perfect. 0:08:28.360 --> 0:08:32.360 Anyway, more importantly, we're back in la and we have 0:08:32.440 --> 0:08:35.560 a very very very special guest with us. 0:08:37.320 --> 0:08:38.120 Dumb then. 0:08:39.640 --> 0:08:43.560 You guys, we have none other than health coach, mom 0:08:43.600 --> 0:08:51.400 preneur entrepreneurs, Mama preneur. I'm fucking separating, Mama preneur. I 0:08:51.480 --> 0:08:53.760 would say, like motivational speaker, even though I don't know 0:08:53.760 --> 0:08:56.200 how much motivation motivational speaking you do, but when I 0:08:56.200 --> 0:08:57.880 read your post, I feel motivated as fuck. 0:08:59.600 --> 0:09:03.040 Massie. Thank you ladies for having me. 0:09:04.160 --> 0:09:05.520 Welcome to the Good Mom Show. 0:09:06.080 --> 0:09:09.920 I'm so excited to be here. Really really cool, dope, 0:09:10.200 --> 0:09:15.200 laid back real ladies. Yeah, we just be chilling. We're 0:09:15.200 --> 0:09:17.880 like ten minutes away, so we'll be friends. 0:09:18.040 --> 0:09:18.280 Yeah. 0:09:18.400 --> 0:09:21.360 Yeah, that's that's basically why we bring everybody here is 0:09:21.400 --> 0:09:24.160 to like, come on our show, ak, be our friend. 0:09:24.559 --> 0:09:27.120 And be our friend and well and hands your life. 0:09:27.120 --> 0:09:28.520 You and hence mine. I'm like, I was looking at 0:09:28.520 --> 0:09:30.600 your page, I was like, I need those How do 0:09:30.640 --> 0:09:34.600 I get those apps? I'm like, wait, she doesn't diet, 0:09:34.760 --> 0:09:38.920 she eats regular. Wait, I'm like, oh my god, And 0:09:39.160 --> 0:09:42.080 like your body is just incredible, like what you've been 0:09:42.080 --> 0:09:44.200 able to like really do and focus in and just 0:09:44.200 --> 0:09:45.319 like it's so motivational. 0:09:45.360 --> 0:09:47.160 I'm like, fuck, I'm gonna get. 0:09:47.080 --> 0:09:48.280 The I was literally like a metre shit on the 0:09:48.280 --> 0:09:49.719 plane right now, and I was like, can't wait to 0:09:49.720 --> 0:09:50.720 get home and go to the gym. 0:09:52.240 --> 0:09:53.520 And I don't even do it in the body. 0:09:53.520 --> 0:09:55.320 I'm going to join the program. I know, well, I know, 0:09:55.400 --> 0:09:57.319 you know what I don't Really it's a byproduct. The 0:09:57.360 --> 0:10:00.440 body is a byproduct because even for me, ex size 0:10:00.520 --> 0:10:03.360 is mental health for me. When I don't do it, 0:10:03.480 --> 0:10:06.760 I realized I started becoming a fucked up person. Really, 0:10:07.200 --> 0:10:10.680 that's my mom juice. Do you drink or you don't drink? 0:10:10.920 --> 0:10:13.480 I barely see. I knew because this is the point 0:10:13.520 --> 0:10:16.280 of drinking. Who were just having this conversation like what's 0:10:16.320 --> 0:10:18.839 the point of drinking? If I'm going to have one drink? 0:10:19.800 --> 0:10:20.520 Like what does that do? 0:10:20.880 --> 0:10:22.400 No, I'm going to have two or three and then 0:10:22.440 --> 0:10:24.720 the next day you just feel like shit. Well maybe 0:10:24.720 --> 0:10:26.560 if maybe two will make you feel like shit? Right? 0:10:27.400 --> 0:10:28.600 What do you right? When you drink? 0:10:28.640 --> 0:10:29.280 What do you drink? 0:10:30.280 --> 0:10:31.079 I don't do wine. 0:10:31.800 --> 0:10:34.520 Wine just makes me feel negative and sleepy, and I 0:10:34.600 --> 0:10:37.040 just don't want to do anything. I do anything, It 0:10:37.040 --> 0:10:43.000 will be vodka on the rocks, no sugar, yeah, yeah, 0:10:43.080 --> 0:10:43.640 well see. 0:10:43.440 --> 0:10:46.520 Even in Miami, I we went out. I think, oh, yeah, 0:10:46.520 --> 0:10:48.839 when you when we left you that last night and 0:10:48.920 --> 0:10:52.000 we went to this to find this amazing afrobeats party. 0:10:52.080 --> 0:10:55.079 Oh really, yeah, it was amazing and they we have 0:10:55.200 --> 0:10:57.360 these drinks and they kept bringing these like I kept 0:10:57.480 --> 0:11:00.199 ordering drinks with pineapple juice and all these and it 0:11:00.280 --> 0:11:01.880 was like a slushy drink and it was delicious. 0:11:01.880 --> 0:11:02.520 It was like leachy. 0:11:02.840 --> 0:11:04.520 But as I'm drinking it, I was like, I can't 0:11:04.600 --> 0:11:08.000 drink any more fucking juice. I'm like I'm gonna throw up. 0:11:08.559 --> 0:11:11.000 And I literally like I can't taste like juice. I 0:11:11.080 --> 0:11:13.319 can't take it anymore. I was like, I and I'm 0:11:13.360 --> 0:11:17.199 not even really a big juice drinker. I find that 0:11:17.320 --> 0:11:18.400 man drink a lot of juice. 0:11:18.400 --> 0:11:18.960 Do you notice that. 0:11:19.600 --> 0:11:22.760 All the men in my life love juice, especially black men. 0:11:22.920 --> 0:11:23.800 They love juice. 0:11:24.400 --> 0:11:28.080 And so I'm more of like, you know, like little soda. 0:11:28.480 --> 0:11:30.440 But for some reason this trip, I was just going 0:11:30.480 --> 0:11:33.000 to all tropicals and I feel it. 0:11:33.160 --> 0:11:34.200 I'm like, in the. 0:11:34.280 --> 0:11:37.120 Morning, my head hurts. I'm like the hangovers worse. 0:11:37.440 --> 0:11:37.839 There you go. 0:11:38.160 --> 0:11:42.920 But also I don't really love alcohol without some for flavor. 0:11:43.040 --> 0:11:44.800 I tried to do a little splash, like give me 0:11:44.880 --> 0:11:47.199 splash pineapple, just a splash, not too much. 0:11:48.000 --> 0:11:49.160 So I just have a little bit bad. 0:11:49.160 --> 0:11:50.600 I agree, it's not from time to time. 0:11:51.280 --> 0:11:53.760 If it's the Ocasian and the vibe is there and 0:11:53.840 --> 0:11:56.160 my friends are there, I'm usually the sober one in 0:11:56.240 --> 0:11:58.480 the room, but I'll. 0:11:58.360 --> 0:12:00.920 Have we will be friends. Yeah, not necessarily. 0:12:01.200 --> 0:12:03.760 I have all this energy in me, and when you 0:12:03.840 --> 0:12:06.199 get to know me, I don't really need. You know, 0:12:06.400 --> 0:12:08.959 often when people why do you drink? It's just to 0:12:09.080 --> 0:12:09.560 loos enough. 0:12:09.640 --> 0:12:10.840 I'm loose. I'm good. 0:12:11.200 --> 0:12:14.120 I'm loose on myself. You're either gonna like me or 0:12:14.120 --> 0:12:17.880 you're gonna hate me. Usually people like me. So yeah, 0:12:18.559 --> 0:12:22.520 I tend not to, you know, drink too much, and 0:12:22.600 --> 0:12:26.120 then I can't do the other things. I feel, business, 0:12:26.320 --> 0:12:29.760 the daughter. Everything just has to be in line. No, 0:12:29.960 --> 0:12:31.440 And you know what, me and Mila had an episode. 0:12:31.440 --> 0:12:34.040 We were talking about j Lo and Sierra and we 0:12:34.160 --> 0:12:35.920 were like, they don't drink and that's why they're beautiful. 0:12:36.000 --> 0:12:37.840 It was, how are we ever going to look like Jaylo? 0:12:37.920 --> 0:12:40.640 And is the era We've got to stop drinking? Ages? 0:12:41.040 --> 0:12:43.719 I I go through phases so I'm like, I'm like 0:12:43.960 --> 0:12:46.040 I'm a yo yo er, which is why I'm reading 0:12:46.080 --> 0:12:47.760 your thing. I was like, oh god, I know I 0:12:48.240 --> 0:12:52.520 even well in December I kind of went like cold 0:12:52.559 --> 0:12:55.080 turkey everything. But I was really patient with my diet. 0:12:55.160 --> 0:12:57.920 I didn't like deprive myself and I just like I 0:12:58.040 --> 0:13:01.040 did eight mostly hell and I was like, Wow, this 0:13:01.160 --> 0:13:04.520 feels so much better, Like this is this is sustainable, 0:13:04.679 --> 0:13:06.920 not like these other things that I've done. I've done 0:13:06.920 --> 0:13:09.120 these extreme diets. Remember after I had my daughter, I 0:13:09.160 --> 0:13:10.920 went on this what the fuck is his name? 0:13:11.000 --> 0:13:12.320 Something Freeman, some. 0:13:12.480 --> 0:13:14.800 Guy, and he, oh, you know I'm talking about I 0:13:14.840 --> 0:13:16.679 know everyone in the Finnis worlds knows him or you know, 0:13:16.800 --> 0:13:18.679 know each other, but him and his girl they have 0:13:18.800 --> 0:13:20.480 like these like you know, these diets that they do, 0:13:20.520 --> 0:13:22.760 and they was so extreme, like I had to eat 0:13:22.840 --> 0:13:26.240 salmon like seven times a day, yeah, for one week 0:13:26.280 --> 0:13:29.959 straight to put my body in kotosis. And then it's 0:13:29.960 --> 0:13:32.520 like when you're it's like when you're just automatically or 0:13:32.520 --> 0:13:33.800 burning fat all the time kind. 0:13:33.679 --> 0:13:36.640 Of right, Let's just say if you cannot sustain it 0:13:36.720 --> 0:13:39.480 for the rest of your life, it's just something you're 0:13:39.520 --> 0:13:44.120 doing short term that may affect you. So it's not 0:13:44.280 --> 0:13:46.120 that you have to eat less is that you have 0:13:46.240 --> 0:13:50.040 to just build a better relationship with food, so I'll 0:13:50.080 --> 0:13:50.360 help you. 0:13:50.520 --> 0:13:52.480 Yeah, my relationship with food is not good. I think 0:13:52.520 --> 0:13:56.439 because I've early on in my going to school with 0:13:56.520 --> 0:13:59.679 mostly white girls, my body was always different. I was 0:13:59.720 --> 0:14:01.959 always curvy, so I was always like judging myself and 0:14:02.040 --> 0:14:04.599 feeling like I was bigger than everyone. And then on 0:14:04.679 --> 0:14:06.800 top of that, I was acting when I was a 0:14:06.880 --> 0:14:08.880 child and doing modeling, so I was just always kind 0:14:08.920 --> 0:14:11.360 of very aware of my body early on, and so 0:14:11.480 --> 0:14:14.640 because of that, I was constantly like comparing myself and 0:14:14.720 --> 0:14:16.839 that as an adult, like Okay, I need to like 0:14:16.920 --> 0:14:18.439 be a certain weight, I need to fit into this. 0:14:18.920 --> 0:14:22.040 So it's been like an extreme thing where like I'm 0:14:22.240 --> 0:14:25.239 either like on an extreme diet or like I'm overeating, 0:14:25.400 --> 0:14:27.800 and then in some points I find balance. And with 0:14:27.920 --> 0:14:32.600 that specific diet that I went on, I just remember 0:14:32.600 --> 0:14:34.080 I wanted to throw up. I was like, how the 0:14:34.240 --> 0:14:35.080 fuck I can't eat? 0:14:35.080 --> 0:14:35.440 I didn't. 0:14:35.440 --> 0:14:37.880 I couldn't eat salmon for two years after that. No, 0:14:38.080 --> 0:14:39.520 Literally I would smell it and. 0:14:39.600 --> 0:14:43.280 Be like, Oh, That's the crazy thing is that's the 0:14:43.400 --> 0:14:46.840 perception that most people have about health and wellness and 0:14:47.000 --> 0:14:51.680 about looking better and feeling better. I mean, I'm getting 0:14:51.720 --> 0:14:54.680 really serious when I know about wellness. I'm really serious. 0:14:54.880 --> 0:14:59.400 This is my passion, right, So mentally, like you just 0:14:59.480 --> 0:15:00.000 have to be away. 0:15:00.520 --> 0:15:02.600 You're what you do most of the time, not what 0:15:02.720 --> 0:15:05.440 you do some of the time. Right, And if you 0:15:05.600 --> 0:15:09.160 empower people with education, no gimmicks, you have to do 0:15:09.400 --> 0:15:12.720 something that is going to be sustainable. Understanding your lifestyle, 0:15:12.840 --> 0:15:17.760 applying different philosophies of maybe eating, exercising to your lifestyle. 0:15:18.000 --> 0:15:21.080 Sometimes we put ourselves into a box trying to do 0:15:21.200 --> 0:15:25.840 something that is completely alien to what fits us, what 0:15:26.000 --> 0:15:30.760 makes us feel good culturally, lifestyle wise, where we are right, 0:15:31.040 --> 0:15:34.440 and what we are able to manage. Like busy moms, 0:15:34.760 --> 0:15:38.040 you have to know how to work out so that 0:15:38.160 --> 0:15:40.640 you're able to have enough energy to do everything else 0:15:40.680 --> 0:15:44.360 that you do. So just you know a process and 0:15:44.480 --> 0:15:46.920 you were giving this big brain and as a woman, 0:15:47.360 --> 0:15:50.920 we're incredible. Learn learn about your bodies, learn about yourself, 0:15:51.800 --> 0:15:56.360 don't follow your intuition what feels good. So over the 0:15:56.520 --> 0:15:59.840 past eleven years, I've just fine tuned what that feels like. 0:16:00.200 --> 0:16:05.240 And the nail popped off, speaking of So, before I 0:16:05.360 --> 0:16:09.680 came in Jesus Christ, I was I really tried. I 0:16:09.800 --> 0:16:12.120 do so many things and people think I'm a robot, 0:16:12.640 --> 0:16:14.280 but I'm trying to simplify my life. 0:16:14.360 --> 0:16:17.200 And I just realized that I just lost a nail. There. 0:16:17.240 --> 0:16:19.960 You don't don't give up on press out on nails 0:16:19.960 --> 0:16:21.480 because I've you just didn't glue them. 0:16:21.720 --> 0:16:22.600 I just didn't glue them. 0:16:22.800 --> 0:16:24.920 Yeah, did any glateos pressed them on? 0:16:25.440 --> 0:16:27.240 No? I did it a little bit, but I just did. 0:16:27.440 --> 0:16:31.160 You know, I'm on this all natural, leaving my hair 0:16:31.280 --> 0:16:34.440 all natural, simplifying my life. Therefore, I can do so 0:16:34.600 --> 0:16:37.320 many other things, which brings me to the next point. 0:16:37.760 --> 0:16:41.400 You know, if you are a business woman, you have 0:16:41.520 --> 0:16:46.080 your kids looking perfect all the time. It's an idea 0:16:46.160 --> 0:16:48.440 that we'd subscribing to you on socials, but it's not. 0:16:49.040 --> 0:16:51.880 You know, the reality is, before I came here, I 0:16:52.000 --> 0:16:54.960 already had a whole entire meeting, woke up at four thirty, 0:16:55.040 --> 0:16:57.720 dropped off my daughter at school, had to get ready 0:16:57.720 --> 0:16:59.800 and do it myself and press on these nails so 0:17:00.080 --> 0:17:03.040 I can be here with you amazing ladies. So you know, 0:17:03.160 --> 0:17:05.800 you just have to do what feels right for you 0:17:05.920 --> 0:17:10.040 and understand that sometimes, depending on the season, you're not 0:17:10.119 --> 0:17:13.560 gonna have it all right, But you will have seasons 0:17:13.640 --> 0:17:17.560 in which you can plan yourself to potentially feel like 0:17:17.640 --> 0:17:19.800 you have it all for the year, for you know, 0:17:20.200 --> 0:17:22.800 or whatever duration it is. Because life is not a 0:17:22.880 --> 0:17:24.480 racist baby. 0:17:24.520 --> 0:17:25.080 You got time. 0:17:25.400 --> 0:17:26.440 We do, we do. 0:17:27.920 --> 0:17:29.600 Wait, so who is Massy eleven years ago? 0:17:29.680 --> 0:17:29.720 Like? 0:17:29.760 --> 0:17:31.600 How did you get into this? How did you get 0:17:31.600 --> 0:17:34.360 into this wellness thing? Have you always been like wellness conscious? 0:17:34.640 --> 0:17:34.800 Oh? 0:17:35.400 --> 0:17:35.919 Not at all. 0:17:36.200 --> 0:17:38.879 When people see me now, they think I had an 0:17:38.880 --> 0:17:42.160 athletic background, that I was in sports. 0:17:41.840 --> 0:17:43.880 For you, worry girl, because I was watching a clip 0:17:44.000 --> 0:17:45.280 of you and this guy on the beach. He was 0:17:45.320 --> 0:17:47.159 like working out with your best friend, and I was like, 0:17:47.280 --> 0:17:48.680 this bitch was a track star for sure. 0:17:50.800 --> 0:17:55.199 I started because of body dysmorphia and depression. I wanted 0:17:55.280 --> 0:17:57.320 to die at some point, just to give you the 0:17:57.359 --> 0:18:01.560 short story, and witness pretty much saved me. 0:18:02.080 --> 0:18:06.240 It really just I found my passion. 0:18:06.600 --> 0:18:08.440 I you know, I was at a point in my 0:18:08.520 --> 0:18:12.399 life where I needed to change my brain chemistream did 0:18:12.440 --> 0:18:15.800 to change, and I found something that I started to 0:18:15.840 --> 0:18:18.359 do for myself, just like you guys started. It was 0:18:18.480 --> 0:18:22.000 never I was never. I never intended to be a business. 0:18:22.119 --> 0:18:27.200 I never intended to be a career. But I was experiencing. 0:18:31.359 --> 0:18:35.679 Depression that took my entire life, so I gave up 0:18:35.720 --> 0:18:37.240 on everything. You know, at the time. 0:18:38.920 --> 0:18:42.040 I emancipated when I was seventeen years old. I came 0:18:42.119 --> 0:18:46.200 to the country from the Caribbean Dominican when I was thirteen. 0:18:49.280 --> 0:18:53.840 Two of my brothers came with me, and by the 0:18:53.960 --> 0:18:57.960 time I was graduating high school, my brother gets diagnosed 0:18:57.960 --> 0:19:01.960 with stage four kidslinghoma is a form of cancer, and. 0:19:03.840 --> 0:19:04.600 Maybe this happens. 0:19:04.600 --> 0:19:06.960 I'm not going to speak on I'm going to speak 0:19:07.000 --> 0:19:11.320 on my culture. But everything it's put on the female, 0:19:11.800 --> 0:19:14.560 right the boys. You know, we create all the boys. 0:19:14.560 --> 0:19:16.760 Everything was put on the females. I was pretty much 0:19:16.800 --> 0:19:20.200 the only one who acclimitted to the culture coming in. 0:19:20.320 --> 0:19:23.639 My brothers didn't, but I did. I was very studious 0:19:23.720 --> 0:19:25.200 from I love to learn. 0:19:25.960 --> 0:19:28.560 Did you come here to California? No? New York? Okay, 0:19:28.720 --> 0:19:30.640 that's where we all end up on the East Coast. 0:19:30.720 --> 0:19:31.200 That's what I thought. 0:19:31.200 --> 0:19:32.840 I thought. I was like, I can't heals New York. 0:19:34.040 --> 0:19:36.560 You ever in Miami, you feel these these East colored vibes, 0:19:36.600 --> 0:19:38.640 even though I've been here in LA for nine years. 0:19:39.119 --> 0:19:42.359 But ultimately, just to give you the short story. You 0:19:42.440 --> 0:19:44.600 can go to my website and see the full documentary. 0:19:45.400 --> 0:19:49.520 I Fitness saved my life. Most people, I come from 0:19:49.560 --> 0:19:53.439 the Caribbean, we have the highest rate, the highest percentages 0:19:53.600 --> 0:19:58.280 of diabetes and hypertension Latinos of all Latinos, right, and 0:19:59.680 --> 0:20:04.600 I I didn't. Even though I grew up doing music, 0:20:04.920 --> 0:20:08.119 ballet here and there, fitness was never a thing that 0:20:08.280 --> 0:20:08.920 females did. 0:20:09.760 --> 0:20:09.920 Right. 0:20:10.840 --> 0:20:14.200 And once I started. 0:20:16.200 --> 0:20:18.200 Feeling what I was feeling, I mean, at seventeen, I 0:20:18.240 --> 0:20:21.080 had the responsibility of my brother not going to the 0:20:21.119 --> 0:20:23.200 school that I wanted to that I work really really 0:20:23.280 --> 0:20:25.760 hard to acclimate to the country. I had to quit 0:20:25.840 --> 0:20:27.719 it all for my brother for a whole entire year 0:20:27.760 --> 0:20:32.280 and a half, and I started changing my life the 0:20:32.400 --> 0:20:34.840 way that I was eating. Most people do not know 0:20:34.960 --> 0:20:38.080 that I have a blood condition that causes my asthma. 0:20:38.800 --> 0:20:44.399 So I couldn't even perform sports because I had a reaction, right, And. 0:20:46.200 --> 0:20:48.480 I literally started. 0:20:50.000 --> 0:20:53.480 At the time, a boyfriend of mine, my first boyfriend 0:20:53.520 --> 0:20:56.639 I ended up in good hands with, who is now 0:20:56.720 --> 0:20:58.920 one of my best friends, was a personal trainer, and 0:20:59.000 --> 0:21:02.119 I fell into this DEPRESSI where I mean, I'm almost 0:21:02.160 --> 0:21:06.520 five nine, I'm tall, right, and I went down to 0:21:06.600 --> 0:21:09.440 maybe one hundred and fourteen pounds to my lowest, looking 0:21:09.480 --> 0:21:13.119 almost anorexic, loosing all my hair, my gums. I mean, 0:21:13.240 --> 0:21:15.160 now it's coming back, thank God, after the baby. 0:21:15.840 --> 0:21:19.680 But I was lost. I quit school, I dropped out. 0:21:19.960 --> 0:21:24.040 I just didn't want to do anything I lived. 0:21:25.560 --> 0:21:28.520 I lived that crazy life that you would never think 0:21:29.160 --> 0:21:34.200 eleven years now the person that I've become, and everything 0:21:34.359 --> 0:21:42.040 I did was to help myself be a different person. Mentally, 0:21:42.160 --> 0:21:47.080 I was weak. I felt weak mentally, and even my 0:21:47.200 --> 0:21:51.760 emotional intelligence wasn't there. Right, So when I say that 0:21:51.840 --> 0:21:53.720 I fitness, I didn't do it for the body, even 0:21:53.720 --> 0:21:56.480 though I had body this morphia. Because I'm from the Caribbe, 0:21:56.520 --> 0:21:58.320 I'm supposed to have curbs. I'm supposed to and I'm 0:21:58.359 --> 0:22:02.280 here an ectomore. Most people do not know as well. 0:22:02.320 --> 0:22:04.240 I have to do very hard things to keep a 0:22:04.280 --> 0:22:08.639 little bit of weight right. So coincidentally, you know, I 0:22:08.760 --> 0:22:16.720 just started doing doing training little by little. I couldn't 0:22:16.720 --> 0:22:19.520 even run a block without losing my breath and having 0:22:19.560 --> 0:22:24.119 an asthma attack, right, And I started sharing my journey 0:22:24.359 --> 0:22:28.160 little by little, and then it just became something huge. Wow, 0:22:28.320 --> 0:22:32.240 Because I was speaking out of honesty, So people followed 0:22:32.320 --> 0:22:35.360 a journey. It's very difficult to do that now, right, 0:22:36.240 --> 0:22:38.920 But back then, when Instagram it was just a filter 0:22:39.080 --> 0:22:42.840 app and it started to develop, people were following my 0:22:42.920 --> 0:22:46.560 journey and they were relating to what I was feeling. 0:22:46.640 --> 0:22:51.880 Because I've been extremely open about my entire life. Right, 0:22:52.560 --> 0:22:55.919 it's only up until three years ago that I've had 0:22:56.000 --> 0:22:59.280 to remain very quiet and very private for reasons that 0:22:59.320 --> 0:23:01.800 we're going to probably we talk about later on. But 0:23:02.760 --> 0:23:04.639 I fell in love with fitness. What it did to 0:23:04.760 --> 0:23:07.439 my brain, what it did to my confidence. I get 0:23:07.520 --> 0:23:10.600 goosebumps still talking about that story, because I will never 0:23:10.720 --> 0:23:15.600 go back. What you feel when you I mean looking 0:23:15.640 --> 0:23:18.080 back eleven years ago, Oh my god, I was like 0:23:18.119 --> 0:23:22.920 a marionette to what we call today the I guess 0:23:23.040 --> 0:23:25.960 like the system, you know, this shoe box that you 0:23:26.040 --> 0:23:29.639 have to feel these ideas. I had to open up 0:23:29.720 --> 0:23:33.600 my mind about a lot of things. In fitness really 0:23:33.840 --> 0:23:40.040 truly gave me power and for a. 0:23:40.280 --> 0:23:40.920 Very long time. 0:23:41.000 --> 0:23:43.000 Once I got in the groove of things that I 0:23:43.119 --> 0:23:45.640 just wanted to mentally feel better, and all was doing 0:23:45.840 --> 0:23:48.400 was like cardio and doing things that going outside, going 0:23:48.480 --> 0:23:52.680 for walks, I started working on my strength because I 0:23:52.760 --> 0:23:56.680 felt weak mentally and physically. And the strength that you 0:23:56.800 --> 0:23:59.959 see and everything that I do today has stemmed from 0:24:00.520 --> 0:24:03.920 that very beginning, the confidence that fitness gives you. And 0:24:04.000 --> 0:24:07.520 I've always been this way always. I want to be 0:24:07.720 --> 0:24:13.080 the best and see the fullest potential that I can be. 0:24:13.560 --> 0:24:17.240 Period. So that's how it all started. No, fitness is 0:24:17.320 --> 0:24:17.880 very important. 0:24:18.240 --> 0:24:21.480 I teach it, I coach it, and I do it 0:24:21.560 --> 0:24:24.320 in a way that is bs free, Well we can 0:24:24.359 --> 0:24:26.600 say bullshit free. I'm not going to be the person 0:24:26.680 --> 0:24:28.119 that is going to tell you what you want to 0:24:28.160 --> 0:24:31.760 hear or sell you a dream. I'm going to give 0:24:31.800 --> 0:24:35.359 you the tools so that we can slowly find a 0:24:35.520 --> 0:24:38.560 process to get you up to speed and take your 0:24:38.680 --> 0:24:42.760 power back with your body, with your health, with I 0:24:42.880 --> 0:24:45.160 mean most of the things that I do is now 0:24:45.359 --> 0:24:48.439 life coaching, because it sounds like therapy. 0:24:49.680 --> 0:24:51.920 It sounds like it's like a therapy, which I think 0:24:52.080 --> 0:24:54.560 in nately, I think once you start getting into shape 0:24:54.560 --> 0:24:57.480 and start working on your body or it, eventually it 0:24:57.960 --> 0:25:01.239 inevitably also starts to affect your mind or train your 0:25:01.280 --> 0:25:01.920 mind in a way. 0:25:02.440 --> 0:25:04.879 Yeah, in a capacity you know if you let it. 0:25:05.359 --> 0:25:07.159 But you know, sometimes I mean, as you know, and 0:25:07.359 --> 0:25:09.800 if you're listening, like I get it, like I'm one 0:25:09.840 --> 0:25:11.480 of those people that is like on their fitness journey 0:25:11.480 --> 0:25:12.200 and I'm like, oh my god. 0:25:12.119 --> 0:25:14.679 I feel so fucking good. I feel amazing, and. 0:25:14.840 --> 0:25:17.000 Like one thing comes into my life to kind of 0:25:17.040 --> 0:25:19.040 like say, put a wrench in it real quick, and 0:25:19.080 --> 0:25:20.840 then it's like am I going to take the wrench 0:25:20.920 --> 0:25:22.840 or I'm going to go And then I don't know, 0:25:23.119 --> 0:25:27.159 like it's it's always the consistence is the consistency for me, 0:25:27.240 --> 0:25:29.440 And I don't know why it's so hard to take 0:25:29.480 --> 0:25:31.960 care of yourself. It's not, but it feels like it 0:25:32.119 --> 0:25:34.399 is in this, in this in the day that in 0:25:34.440 --> 0:25:36.840 the space and time that ran with our being moms, 0:25:36.960 --> 0:25:39.800 being entrepreneurs, Like I want to travel, Like, oh shit, 0:25:39.800 --> 0:25:41.040 I'm going to go away for a week. How am 0:25:41.080 --> 0:25:42.960 I going to make sure that I stay active in 0:25:43.000 --> 0:25:44.560 that week? And then I come back and I'm not 0:25:45.240 --> 0:25:48.480 making excuses. O god, I'll go back in a few days. 0:25:48.520 --> 0:25:48.680 You know. 0:25:49.160 --> 0:25:51.560 It's really like the commitment to yourself like anything like 0:25:51.640 --> 0:25:55.160 whether that's therapy, whether that's you know, you're building something 0:25:55.200 --> 0:25:57.720 that you're that you're passionate about and also like taking 0:25:57.800 --> 0:26:01.120 care of this thing, only now we only get one 0:26:01.200 --> 0:26:02.960 of I think if I see people. I was on 0:26:03.040 --> 0:26:05.320 the airplane today and there was this woman. She didn't 0:26:05.320 --> 0:26:06.919 even look that old, but like she needed to get 0:26:07.000 --> 0:26:08.720 up a wheelchair, and I was like, oh my god, 0:26:08.880 --> 0:26:12.119 Like I'm so grateful that my legs work, like you 0:26:12.240 --> 0:26:15.360 take for granted, like just little things that just come 0:26:15.520 --> 0:26:19.320 naturally until you don't have that shit because he I mean, 0:26:19.359 --> 0:26:21.840 it should happens. But also like you know, because it's 0:26:21.880 --> 0:26:26.320 your own, because of yourself. We don't become old because 0:26:26.320 --> 0:26:26.840 we age. 0:26:27.000 --> 0:26:29.520 We become old because we stop moving and doing the 0:26:29.640 --> 0:26:31.840 things that are going to keep us young and keep 0:26:31.920 --> 0:26:32.359 us sexy. 0:26:32.920 --> 0:26:35.159 There has to be some sort of vanity that you 0:26:35.320 --> 0:26:35.919 have to have in. 0:26:35.960 --> 0:26:39.439 Self respect and self worth that you look at yourself 0:26:39.480 --> 0:26:41.160 and you learn how to cope in the right ways. 0:26:42.320 --> 0:26:44.520 I mean, I could grab the glass of wine. I 0:26:44.560 --> 0:26:47.639 mean it's easy when when you don't have other tools 0:26:47.720 --> 0:26:50.399 to manage with your children. I mean it raising a 0:26:50.480 --> 0:26:53.480 child on your own as a single mom is it's 0:26:53.560 --> 0:26:56.960 already hard. So learning the tools to be able to 0:26:57.040 --> 0:27:02.639 be more efficient in and troubleshoot what you want, it 0:27:02.840 --> 0:27:08.360 takes planning right. But these things are doable. So that's 0:27:08.440 --> 0:27:11.280 what fitness teaches you in the beginning if you've never 0:27:11.359 --> 0:27:17.240 done it. Because imagine, like I've been verbally abused let 0:27:17.359 --> 0:27:23.920 other people, I would say, you don't you allow people 0:27:23.960 --> 0:27:28.440 to make you feel certain things, you know, not even 0:27:28.560 --> 0:27:29.560 loving my body for. 0:27:29.680 --> 0:27:34.040 What it was, for who I was. So think about 0:27:34.119 --> 0:27:37.680 emotional abuse, all of it. Now you can't do that. 0:27:38.960 --> 0:27:41.679 There's even now because most people ask me if I'm 0:27:41.760 --> 0:27:45.960 dating and whatnot and prospects. It's like you have to 0:27:46.040 --> 0:27:50.080 come correct because I know from a mile away what 0:27:50.160 --> 0:27:52.359 you're bringing to the table, and that's okay with me. 0:27:53.240 --> 0:27:56.359 You know, it's okay with me. I'm still single and 0:27:56.440 --> 0:27:57.520 will be for a very long time. 0:27:58.680 --> 0:28:01.639 Yeah. It's like if you're not if you're not aware 0:28:01.680 --> 0:28:06.320 of your self worth, then you're more susceptible to emotional abuse, 0:28:06.560 --> 0:28:08.440 you know, because then you believe it. If you don't 0:28:08.480 --> 0:28:10.239 know who you are, which you know what you are, 0:28:10.400 --> 0:28:12.000 people can say is anything to you and then it'll 0:28:12.000 --> 0:28:15.680 affect you. But I'm reading a book and it discusses 0:28:15.800 --> 0:28:19.000 like specifically how women are loved from like childhood into 0:28:19.040 --> 0:28:22.439 adulthood and that you know, we generally don't have complexes 0:28:22.520 --> 0:28:25.560 with our bodies until puberty, and at that point we're 0:28:25.760 --> 0:28:28.159 we kind of be we kind of adopt the understanding 0:28:28.240 --> 0:28:31.080 that we have to show up a certain way in 0:28:31.119 --> 0:28:33.800 our bodies, and then our self worth is tied to that. 0:28:33.920 --> 0:28:36.000 And then that's when like at puberty, at your mom 0:28:36.160 --> 0:28:38.440 is like put on earrings or you're not dressing like 0:28:38.440 --> 0:28:40.560 a lady, or like there's this like at puberty, you 0:28:40.640 --> 0:28:44.240 start to understand how your appearance affects your worth and 0:28:44.600 --> 0:28:49.040 like even like I'm skinny, you're curvy, and like having 0:28:49.280 --> 0:28:52.720 even having such different body types, we're all affected by 0:28:53.800 --> 0:28:57.040 society's standard of what beauty is and how you're supposed 0:28:57.080 --> 0:28:59.200 to show up. And then like that, you know, if 0:28:59.400 --> 0:29:01.239 it doesn't look like this, and you're too skinny, if 0:29:01.240 --> 0:29:03.160 you're too if you're to this, then you're to that. 0:29:03.280 --> 0:29:06.360 And it's just like how those standards start to like 0:29:06.920 --> 0:29:10.400 warp how you feel about yourself, and like we're all 0:29:10.480 --> 0:29:12.760 beautiful women and we're all gonna look differently, but like 0:29:12.880 --> 0:29:15.680 how you feel is generally like the most the most 0:29:15.720 --> 0:29:18.480 important catalyst of everything else. You know, It's like you 0:29:18.600 --> 0:29:20.520 might be thicker than you know, and I might be skinny, 0:29:20.520 --> 0:29:22.600 and I've been skinny for my whole life and I'm 0:29:22.640 --> 0:29:25.840 still and also like felt like too skinny and not 0:29:26.000 --> 0:29:30.479 curvy enough, and like, but it's just crazy how if 0:29:30.560 --> 0:29:33.520 you're not aware of who you are and and really 0:29:33.600 --> 0:29:36.080 just taking care of yourself, you can easily be told anything. 0:29:36.720 --> 0:29:40.000 And what's funny is because it's cultural too, in our culture, 0:29:40.040 --> 0:29:43.560 blacks and browns or curvy, right, this is why bbls 0:29:43.600 --> 0:29:46.840 are very popular, popular, right, But at the end of 0:29:46.840 --> 0:29:48.960 the day, it's not the bl that's going to maintain 0:29:49.000 --> 0:29:49.840 a family together. 0:29:50.320 --> 0:29:50.480 Right. 0:29:50.800 --> 0:29:52.480 You can have all the surgeries in the world and 0:29:52.600 --> 0:29:55.160 have the nicest body in the world is you. So 0:29:55.400 --> 0:29:58.400 it's how you show up for yourself is what you 0:29:58.520 --> 0:30:02.960 do every single day that it's it is self self 0:30:03.080 --> 0:30:07.160 love and self worth goes far beyond than what you 0:30:07.320 --> 0:30:07.720 look like. 0:30:07.960 --> 0:30:11.560 And I always say we should never be in denial, 0:30:12.720 --> 0:30:14.480 you know, and there's a lot of us who are 0:30:14.560 --> 0:30:18.680 in denial. At the end of the day, you you 0:30:18.840 --> 0:30:20.480 know what you have to do to get on the 0:30:20.520 --> 0:30:23.800 other side. How how you get to the. 0:30:23.880 --> 0:30:27.920 Other side, right, is what's important because at the end 0:30:27.960 --> 0:30:31.680 of a day, like I'm referring it back to saying like, 0:30:31.880 --> 0:30:35.480 you know who you are, you accentuate the you know 0:30:35.800 --> 0:30:38.600 your body the way that you want to accentuate it. Right, 0:30:38.760 --> 0:30:40.960 So if you don't, if you're not where you want 0:30:41.000 --> 0:30:43.880 to be, then let's fix it. And let's fix it 0:30:43.960 --> 0:30:47.760 from an area that comes from love instead of hate. 0:30:48.000 --> 0:30:50.280 Right like, okay, Like, let's not be a denial girl 0:30:50.320 --> 0:30:54.920 like you let yourself go ooh, I'm here to help together. 0:30:55.080 --> 0:30:57.280 Let's go, let's do this, right, Let's get you back 0:30:57.320 --> 0:31:00.600 to being who you feel like you want to be. 0:31:01.360 --> 0:31:03.600 And he's transcending even body types. 0:31:04.280 --> 0:31:10.520 Right. Well, we give this thing on our show where 0:31:10.600 --> 0:31:16.160 we play a little game called Trigger and I would 0:31:16.160 --> 0:31:17.960 love to play with you to get to know you 0:31:18.000 --> 0:31:21.800 a little better quickly. Basically, I say a word and 0:31:21.920 --> 0:31:25.000 then you say the first thing that comes to your mind. Okay, 0:31:25.080 --> 0:31:31.080 don't overthink it, you might get nasty. And when's your birthday? 0:31:31.880 --> 0:31:34.520 That's part of trigger base is Yeah, it is in 0:31:34.600 --> 0:31:37.640 this one, okay, because it's never been in there before. 0:31:37.680 --> 0:31:40.440 You want my son, my moon, my you don't give 0:31:40.480 --> 0:31:41.360 us a la. 0:31:42.800 --> 0:31:43.520 We might as well, what is it? 0:31:43.600 --> 0:31:43.880 Actually? 0:31:43.920 --> 0:31:44.240 What is it? 0:31:46.160 --> 0:31:48.440 Oh God turner? 0:31:48.680 --> 0:31:53.000 Actually, but my son is in sash Okay my moon 0:31:53.120 --> 0:31:56.240 is in Gemini. Oh my my venus instant Scorpio. 0:31:56.640 --> 0:31:59.160 Okay, which you're rising? Do you're rising? 0:32:00.080 --> 0:32:00.200 Oh? 0:32:00.440 --> 0:32:01.280 Your fire baby? 0:32:01.560 --> 0:32:05.080 Yeah, but you're so you're you're rising and your sun 0:32:05.200 --> 0:32:08.800 are our fire and then your moon is what's Gemini air? Yeah? 0:32:09.920 --> 0:32:14.000 I don't know what the Andrew Latina, you're a fucking firecracker. 0:32:16.320 --> 0:32:17.920 The hate of what fire signs? 0:32:18.640 --> 0:32:19.560 Which is a sign? 0:32:19.760 --> 0:32:20.240 Air signs? 0:32:22.400 --> 0:32:29.920 Specifically Geminii. He's an Aquarius. Oh, I love Aquariuses. Yeah, 0:32:30.000 --> 0:32:32.440 I mean I think there's specific signs that do. I 0:32:32.480 --> 0:32:35.840 always say like it's the unhealed versions of these signs. 0:32:36.040 --> 0:32:38.560 And granted not everyone's no one's healed, right, but like 0:32:38.560 --> 0:32:40.959 the ones that have you haven't even been no acknowledge 0:32:41.040 --> 0:32:43.120 that they needed to do any sort of work at all. 0:32:43.480 --> 0:32:45.680 Those are the ones you gotta be careful. Those are 0:32:45.760 --> 0:32:49.440 the terrifying ones because I'm a Scorpio, and Scorpios, you 0:32:49.520 --> 0:32:51.720 know we are. We're already kind of like, you know, 0:32:51.760 --> 0:32:55.320 we're a little tricky. So when do you even say 0:32:55.400 --> 0:33:00.280 tricky not tricky like like sneaky. Well, yes, but if 0:33:00.320 --> 0:33:04.200 you're done wrong, yeah, but I think you know, we 0:33:04.320 --> 0:33:08.080 can just be evil in ways and there's certain signs 0:33:08.120 --> 0:33:12.440 that don't really have evil in them, you know, you know, 0:33:12.680 --> 0:33:16.840 and so I you know cancer too because she's cancer. 0:33:17.320 --> 0:33:21.360 Very highly emotional you know too, Like just as much 0:33:21.360 --> 0:33:26.840 as a scorpio bitch. I'm not saying that highly emotional 0:33:27.080 --> 0:33:31.479 aspect you are working on yourself can come out hateful. 0:33:31.640 --> 0:33:31.880 Yeah. 0:33:32.360 --> 0:33:34.840 So I feel like, especially with the men. 0:33:35.000 --> 0:33:36.840 It's like my dad. My dad is a scorpio. He's 0:33:36.880 --> 0:33:40.080 the coolest guy. Yeah, but walk correct. 0:33:40.160 --> 0:33:44.160 Yeah, he'll love you until he don't until you do 0:33:44.320 --> 0:33:45.320 something wrong and then that's it. 0:33:45.600 --> 0:33:47.280 Ye, ghosted. 0:33:48.800 --> 0:33:49.360 For life. 0:33:51.840 --> 0:33:52.280 I could do that. 0:33:53.200 --> 0:33:55.320 Okay, here we go, let's play trigger guys. 0:33:57.320 --> 0:34:05.040 Bad habits have so many I was gonna say, you 0:34:05.040 --> 0:34:08.520 don't have any bad habits. 0:34:11.320 --> 0:34:12.400 Trying to save people? 0:34:13.800 --> 0:34:17.680 Captain save ah, that's like that part bad habits of 0:34:17.920 --> 0:34:21.400 just women and everyone, because I don't with all the 0:34:21.520 --> 0:34:25.120 red flags like are there for you, are men. 0:34:25.080 --> 0:34:26.239 Doing a lot of saving? No? 0:34:26.680 --> 0:34:29.040 I don't think so. Yeah, I mean maybe like financially 0:34:29.160 --> 0:34:32.640 sometimes it makes them feel good, but that saving like 0:34:33.200 --> 0:34:37.720 like brand building of a human that's women's women marriage, 0:34:40.160 --> 0:34:45.280 not those eyes marriage, she said, slavery. 0:34:49.400 --> 0:34:58.279 A mutual contract, motherhood Jesus is supposed to be quick 0:34:58.320 --> 0:35:06.239 on the best thing that ever happened to me. Religion agnostic, 0:35:07.080 --> 0:35:09.160 but very Christian? 0:35:10.200 --> 0:35:13.120 Is an agnostic Christian? You don't believe. 0:35:13.160 --> 0:35:18.520 But it's not that I'm believing. But we don't know. 0:35:19.000 --> 0:35:21.200 You don't know. We just don't know. We just don't know. 0:35:21.480 --> 0:35:24.560 But I am. I'm a child of God, very Christian, 0:35:24.680 --> 0:35:27.480 born in a very Orthodox That don't make no sense. 0:35:27.640 --> 0:35:28.759 How are you going to be a child of God? 0:35:28.880 --> 0:35:32.160 Very Christian? But you're agnostic? Agnostic? Because think about this, 0:35:32.239 --> 0:35:33.640 if you're a Muslim, do I hate you? 0:35:34.719 --> 0:35:34.839 Well? 0:35:34.880 --> 0:35:36.200 Do you think if you choose a religion you have 0:35:36.239 --> 0:35:37.400 to hate them, hate one of them? 0:35:37.640 --> 0:35:39.840 Well? But most Orthodox religions. 0:35:39.560 --> 0:35:44.000 They are there's a hierarchy, and for me, we don't 0:35:44.080 --> 0:35:49.560 know we have If you understand world religion, we're all 0:35:49.680 --> 0:35:53.400 saying that something higher exists and we're all creating our 0:35:53.440 --> 0:35:56.799 different stories. But at the end of the day, most religions, 0:35:57.800 --> 0:36:01.800 God is love. So I am not going to hate 0:36:02.320 --> 0:36:06.040 on another religion, hate on another person because I am 0:36:06.760 --> 0:36:11.600 believing in my opinioned opinion of what is up there. 0:36:11.920 --> 0:36:14.000 So that's what I mean when I say agnostic. I 0:36:14.080 --> 0:36:17.719 can sit down with anyone and hear you out and 0:36:17.840 --> 0:36:19.640 continue to learn. But at the end of a day, 0:36:19.719 --> 0:36:22.680 we don't know. We don't know what's up there and 0:36:22.760 --> 0:36:26.200 what's waiting. What we do know is that we are 0:36:26.560 --> 0:36:30.200 all made out of flesh, and even though we want 0:36:30.239 --> 0:36:36.880 to be different and differentiate ourselves from whether it's cultural, ethnicity, race, 0:36:37.320 --> 0:36:39.600 believes political, at the end of a day, we all 0:36:39.680 --> 0:36:41.799 go through one thing that will have in common. It's 0:36:41.840 --> 0:36:46.879 human experienced and death exactly. So that's what I mean, 0:36:47.960 --> 0:36:49.600 got it. I know what I know, and I follow 0:36:49.640 --> 0:36:54.080 what I follow, but technically we do not know. So 0:36:54.200 --> 0:36:57.759 are you also open to adopting certain belief systems of 0:36:57.840 --> 0:36:59.360 other religions that they resonate with you? 0:37:00.160 --> 0:37:05.920 Well, if you look at oh we're going at home, 0:37:05.960 --> 0:37:10.920 my mom is going to kill me upset, but she 0:37:11.200 --> 0:37:18.320 as well has opened herself to being more receptive. So 0:37:18.800 --> 0:37:19.560 what would you ask me? 0:37:19.600 --> 0:37:19.799 Again? 0:37:19.840 --> 0:37:19.960 Oh? 0:37:20.000 --> 0:37:21.680 I was just asking if would you be open to 0:37:21.920 --> 0:37:24.920 adopting a other belief systems and of other religions if 0:37:24.920 --> 0:37:25.800 they resonated with you? 0:37:26.000 --> 0:37:26.200 Yeah? 0:37:26.360 --> 0:37:30.560 Yeah, okay, cool, Like being kind and loving your neighbor, yeah, 0:37:30.719 --> 0:37:32.440 or like I don't know, whatever it is, like certain 0:37:32.520 --> 0:37:48.800 rituals or belief systems in general, like you know, okay, monogamy, tradition, 0:37:49.680 --> 0:38:05.480 open relationship, good luck, childhood, special h your childhood, wonderful, obesity, 0:38:12.800 --> 0:38:31.160 preventive health, priority, cannabis, and a loos like man, black women, gorgeous? 0:38:33.480 --> 0:38:41.440 Favorite artist dead or alive? We're doing this, favorite artists live. 0:38:43.120 --> 0:38:44.320 I would say. 0:38:46.800 --> 0:38:50.520 Jesus Christ. That is just hard. I was like, Jesus, 0:38:50.960 --> 0:38:54.600 what song he got? I'm just so ambiguous with my 0:38:54.920 --> 0:38:59.720 with my what him? I would say, I mean total 0:38:59.760 --> 0:39:04.920 pad which I will say Bruno Mars. Okay, he was 0:39:04.960 --> 0:39:05.640 so talented. 0:39:05.800 --> 0:39:07.000 I was expecting Bruno. 0:39:07.360 --> 0:39:10.279 Bruno Mars is like an all like old time. You know, 0:39:10.400 --> 0:39:12.600 you can just put it anywhere, listen to it. He's 0:39:12.719 --> 0:39:15.680 just like whether you're crying, hyped up, motivated. 0:39:16.640 --> 0:39:18.440 Did you have you seen his documentary where he was 0:39:18.440 --> 0:39:22.600 like a little Elvis impersonator as a child on the islands. No, yes, 0:39:22.719 --> 0:39:25.440 he was an Elvis impersonator, like a tiny Elvis impersonator, 0:39:25.640 --> 0:39:28.919 like seven years old Hawaii, maybe the younger six in Hawaii. Yeah. 0:39:28.960 --> 0:39:31.200 He would get hired for parties and he was the best. 0:39:31.440 --> 0:39:33.520 That's hilarious. That's why he has that You know he 0:39:33.600 --> 0:39:36.160 got that little do wop soul ship going on. 0:39:36.239 --> 0:39:38.279 I'm gonna change my mind. I'm an artist. I would 0:39:38.320 --> 0:39:42.760 say one who one Luis Gera Louise. 0:39:42.840 --> 0:39:45.480 If you're if I'm going on the Spanish inside, you 0:39:45.520 --> 0:39:45.960 gotta go there. 0:39:46.000 --> 0:39:48.399 He would be the ultimate. Okay is he still alive? 0:39:48.640 --> 0:39:51.960 Oh yeah, okay, he's still popping? Oh? Is he cute? 0:39:53.040 --> 0:39:53.800 I mean not like that? 0:39:54.080 --> 0:39:57.640 Well you just said it like international were like, I 0:39:57.719 --> 0:40:00.160 was like, do I need to look at he know, 0:40:00.239 --> 0:40:01.120 he's like a dad. 0:40:03.480 --> 0:40:06.480 To turn on. 0:40:07.760 --> 0:40:20.120 Intelligence, turn off arrogance, masturbation, needed, threesomes, good. 0:40:20.000 --> 0:40:21.359 Luck, favorite. 0:40:22.760 --> 0:40:23.600 Goods that fire. 0:40:23.719 --> 0:40:30.240 She's like, it's my good luck. Not I don't share? Uh, anal, 0:40:33.040 --> 0:40:36.120 why not if you're with your partner? Why not? 0:40:36.600 --> 0:40:37.840 Favorite porn category? 0:40:40.840 --> 0:40:44.359 I don't help one. You don't watch porn? Yeah, it's 0:40:44.360 --> 0:40:45.040 not for everybody. 0:40:46.000 --> 0:40:46.120 Uh. 0:40:47.160 --> 0:40:54.600 Favorite position It all depends in love. 0:40:55.520 --> 0:40:57.480 Yeah, like in love or like casual sex or two 0:40:57.480 --> 0:40:57.920 different ones. 0:40:57.960 --> 0:40:59.560 I mean I don't know what cassual sex is. 0:40:59.640 --> 0:41:04.520 Okay, favorite position in overall sex missionary visionary looking at 0:41:04.640 --> 0:41:07.480 as it's yeah, it's it's it's intimacy. 0:41:07.719 --> 0:41:08.560 It's about intimacy. 0:41:08.640 --> 0:41:09.920 That's a scorpia venus. 0:41:10.600 --> 0:41:11.719 Yeah, it's like. 0:41:13.360 --> 0:41:19.520 Yeah, yeah, if you break eye contact, I can't trust you. 0:41:21.160 --> 0:41:22.720 Oh you can't look at me. It's over. 0:41:27.440 --> 0:41:37.880 Therapy. Essential celebrity crush, m. 0:41:41.640 --> 0:41:44.640 Am. I weird that I don't have any like celebrity. 0:41:45.239 --> 0:41:47.560 I mean now it's not met some people that I 0:41:47.640 --> 0:41:48.920 really that I had. 0:41:48.800 --> 0:41:52.759 A crush on and it was a disappointment. So I 0:41:52.840 --> 0:41:55.640 don't have any crushes per se, because I need to 0:41:55.800 --> 0:41:57.600 know who you are as a person. Do you have 0:41:57.640 --> 0:42:00.520 an I'm a sapiosexual. Do you have any brushes right 0:42:00.560 --> 0:42:02.040 now in real life? 0:42:03.120 --> 0:42:03.319 Yes? 0:42:03.920 --> 0:42:05.960 You do? I do? Oh just one? 0:42:07.880 --> 0:42:15.800 Yeah, couple, I have a couple, right And I'm just 0:42:15.880 --> 0:42:18.800 seeing how you're gonna You know, this is a scorpio vibe. 0:42:18.880 --> 0:42:22.239 You just take it's low and see if you're down 0:42:22.320 --> 0:42:25.600 for the long ride. 0:42:26.600 --> 0:42:28.359 How has it takes me a lot to trust people? 0:42:28.480 --> 0:42:30.400 How has dating been as a single mom? Because you 0:42:30.480 --> 0:42:33.719 were married a joke? You were married before? 0:42:33.800 --> 0:42:33.920 Right? 0:42:34.040 --> 0:42:34.200 Yes? 0:42:34.280 --> 0:42:35.279 And how long were you married? 0:42:35.320 --> 0:42:38.160 For? Three years? Sure? Were you guys with each other 0:42:38.360 --> 0:42:39.880 prior to that for a good amount of time as well? 0:42:40.160 --> 0:42:40.359 Years? 0:42:41.000 --> 0:42:43.239 Eight years and then three years married? Yeah, so no, 0:42:43.400 --> 0:42:44.160 not eight years total? 0:42:44.520 --> 0:42:48.720 Eight years? Nine years total. Three of those were married. 0:42:48.800 --> 0:42:51.200 That's a long time in your a very long time. 0:42:51.280 --> 0:42:53.360 And I feel like I don't know how old you are, 0:42:53.480 --> 0:42:56.160 but like in a I'm about to be thirty five 0:42:56.200 --> 0:43:02.520 this year Club listen, thirty five is a different thirty five. 0:43:03.160 --> 0:43:05.320 It is, I mean because even my relationship, I was 0:43:05.360 --> 0:43:07.759 with my partner for seven years. We got together when 0:43:07.800 --> 0:43:10.279 I was twenty two, so he took up all of 0:43:10.320 --> 0:43:12.440 my twenties pretty much, like from twenty two to thirty, 0:43:12.680 --> 0:43:16.359 you know, And so those are like such integral, moste 0:43:16.440 --> 0:43:19.000 parts of your life, those twenties, you know. So I 0:43:19.160 --> 0:43:24.799 was it's it shaped me in ways you're naive still, yeah, yeah, 0:43:25.880 --> 0:43:29.239 So coming out of your marriage, like how what was 0:43:30.239 --> 0:43:30.719 what was that? 0:43:30.960 --> 0:43:31.000 Like? 0:43:31.120 --> 0:43:34.320 I mean, I guess choosing to not be married anymore. 0:43:34.360 --> 0:43:36.000 I mean, at least for me, Like there was a 0:43:36.160 --> 0:43:38.719 definitely like a moment in my relationship where I was 0:43:38.800 --> 0:43:40.440 extremely happy for a long period of time. And I 0:43:40.520 --> 0:43:42.480 talk about that too, and even in our book, I say, 0:43:42.600 --> 0:43:44.760 like there were years in which I was totally happy. 0:43:44.800 --> 0:43:48.120 I was blissfully Like me and my partner we don't argue, 0:43:48.719 --> 0:43:51.560 like everything's perfect, like he's mean to other people, but 0:43:51.680 --> 0:43:56.480 never to me, I say the attention how people treat others, 0:43:56.680 --> 0:43:58.080 I know, well, you know, well. 0:43:58.040 --> 0:43:58.520 It's it was. 0:43:58.600 --> 0:44:01.719 I was a dumbach just like, oh my god, I'm 0:44:01.800 --> 0:44:06.760 special and be charismatic, and he was extremely charismatic and funny. 0:44:06.800 --> 0:44:07.880 So there were all a lot of things that kind 0:44:07.880 --> 0:44:10.960 of balance those things out, you know. And you know 0:44:11.000 --> 0:44:13.040 we we're young too, and so is he in ways, 0:44:13.400 --> 0:44:16.719 so like there will be challenges, and. 0:44:17.280 --> 0:44:20.279 From a very young age, I've always been the same. 0:44:20.719 --> 0:44:22.680 I don't think you know, I think we evolve our 0:44:22.760 --> 0:44:27.160 personality traits. But I'm very independent. I'm a learner. I 0:44:27.280 --> 0:44:31.400 love to learn, and I'm just a force to be 0:44:31.440 --> 0:44:33.239 reckoned with in everything that I do. That's how my 0:44:33.400 --> 0:44:36.360 parents race me. They raised me with a lot of 0:44:39.840 --> 0:44:42.200 They gave me a lot of confidence. You're gonna be great, 0:44:42.320 --> 0:44:45.400 You're gonna do great things. They they always instilled that 0:44:45.480 --> 0:44:48.279 in me, especially my dad, until I was on the 0:44:48.360 --> 0:44:48.799 other path. 0:44:49.040 --> 0:44:52.320 He just is o me, but for other path for 0:44:52.400 --> 0:44:54.560 a good reason, right, because I had to learn right. 0:44:54.760 --> 0:44:56.560 So I think. 0:44:57.920 --> 0:45:02.000 People grow apart. And for me, the concept of marriage 0:45:02.320 --> 0:45:08.200 was very important because if I was going to get married, 0:45:09.280 --> 0:45:13.040 it's for life, okay, But that those were not my circumstances. 0:45:13.280 --> 0:45:17.480 I didn't get married for those reasons. 0:45:18.520 --> 0:45:20.279 I looked at my daughter and I said, is this 0:45:20.560 --> 0:45:22.840 the version of MASSI that you want your daughter to 0:45:22.960 --> 0:45:27.399 grow up with? Absolutely not. My daughter is not going 0:45:27.480 --> 0:45:32.080 to have this idea of me. And he was very 0:45:32.160 --> 0:45:35.040 hard to do because you don't want to break that dynamic. 0:45:36.080 --> 0:45:39.680 When people get together, you know their weaknesses and their strengths. 0:45:39.920 --> 0:45:41.759 It's not like you're weak in this point and I'm 0:45:41.840 --> 0:45:43.759 strong in this point, and now I have to feel 0:45:43.800 --> 0:45:44.359 a certain way. 0:45:44.840 --> 0:45:46.320 But you put those strengths together. 0:45:46.640 --> 0:45:49.680 Usually that weakness that you have may be your partner strengths, 0:45:49.960 --> 0:45:53.600 right and vice verse, So you work together to grow. 0:45:54.120 --> 0:45:55.400 And that never happened. 0:45:56.040 --> 0:45:58.759 So I felt like I kept growing and growing and 0:45:58.840 --> 0:46:02.759 growing and demanding the best version of myself and just 0:46:02.920 --> 0:46:06.839 doing that and just being I'm very just open, like, hey, 0:46:06.960 --> 0:46:09.600 do you I'm just gonna continue to do me. But 0:46:10.120 --> 0:46:14.120 let this never stop, because I'm never going to stop 0:46:14.200 --> 0:46:18.000 being Mossy. And when I'm silenced, that's when it's everything 0:46:18.160 --> 0:46:21.960 just fell apart and it was not amicable, and I'm 0:46:22.000 --> 0:46:26.439 still dealing with the repercussions of that, and it's it's tough, 0:46:27.520 --> 0:46:32.319 and it's tough to be tough because usually people don't 0:46:32.320 --> 0:46:34.560 see like, hey, I'm a human. I have all these 0:46:34.600 --> 0:46:36.560 emotions that I can't even share with you right now, 0:46:36.600 --> 0:46:40.360 but I have to remain strong for my daughter because 0:46:40.440 --> 0:46:44.640 I had to run and start from scratch and rebuild myself. 0:46:45.239 --> 0:46:49.520 So from the from the behind the scenes, my following, 0:46:49.600 --> 0:46:52.840 my tribe, I call my my my following, my tribe. 0:46:53.239 --> 0:46:56.239 We have connected for X amount of years, eleven years, 0:46:56.320 --> 0:47:00.600 and you you see this person just over sometimes oversharing, 0:47:01.200 --> 0:47:03.239 but oversharing from a point that he's going to be 0:47:03.320 --> 0:47:06.800 helpful to another person, and then he just went cold. 0:47:07.040 --> 0:47:08.680 There's no sharing, there's no anything. 0:47:09.000 --> 0:47:10.800 Was that Was that because you chose to do that 0:47:10.920 --> 0:47:13.400 or you felt like you had to protect your relationship 0:47:13.520 --> 0:47:17.160 or protect what was going on without influence or craving silence? 0:47:17.440 --> 0:47:18.200 Was it was he was? 0:47:18.600 --> 0:47:21.719 Did you feel like he was like prohibiting you from 0:47:21.880 --> 0:47:24.800 like just interacting in a way that you generally would. 0:47:24.600 --> 0:47:28.440 Have No, I would say most you know, we had 0:47:28.480 --> 0:47:36.319 this conversation off before you arrived. But it's you see 0:47:36.360 --> 0:47:38.640 this a lot in the black and brown communities. 0:47:38.920 --> 0:47:42.080 Usually when breakups happened, there's a lot of he said, 0:47:42.200 --> 0:47:46.880 she said, And then you have to protect the other sides, 0:47:47.040 --> 0:47:50.720 protect your family. You have a family that's grieving what's happening. 0:47:51.000 --> 0:47:54.120 You also have a daughter or a child that eventually 0:47:54.239 --> 0:47:56.440 is going to see this and he's going to impact them. 0:47:57.520 --> 0:48:01.880 So I just didn't want to speak on something that 0:48:01.960 --> 0:48:07.200 I was still processing. You're unhappy in a relationship. Relationships, 0:48:07.239 --> 0:48:10.480 you have to work and if you're unhappy, let's work 0:48:10.520 --> 0:48:11.960 on the things that we're unhappy about. 0:48:12.239 --> 0:48:14.160 And let's putting the hard work now. 0:48:14.200 --> 0:48:15.719 If you don't want to put in that heart work 0:48:15.760 --> 0:48:18.760 and we are both them happy at least I was unhappy, 0:48:19.280 --> 0:48:21.600 then it's time to break ties and we can do 0:48:21.680 --> 0:48:25.279 it amicably. But again, breaking ties would mean what would 0:48:25.360 --> 0:48:28.840 that mean? That now we're breaking up what we had together? 0:48:28.920 --> 0:48:30.680 But it was fine by me because I can start 0:48:31.320 --> 0:48:36.440 from scratch and no problem, right, and I can continue 0:48:36.520 --> 0:48:39.400 to work with you in that capacity we were a 0:48:39.480 --> 0:48:44.439 great team. Okay, If if we were a great team, great, 0:48:44.560 --> 0:48:46.480 we can continue this. All I want is my freedom 0:48:48.120 --> 0:48:49.759 because I don't want to be in this marriage. This 0:48:49.920 --> 0:48:51.680 is not working for me, and this is not making 0:48:51.760 --> 0:48:53.080 me happy, and this is not how I want to 0:48:53.160 --> 0:48:54.640 raise my daughter right. 0:48:55.200 --> 0:48:58.040 But we I really tried, and we tried right. So 0:48:59.120 --> 0:49:04.120 eventually when I rebuild everything I. 0:49:04.280 --> 0:49:07.640 Had to learn, I didn't have the time to go 0:49:07.800 --> 0:49:11.480 on social media and explain these things that were just 0:49:11.960 --> 0:49:17.080 unfolding so slow, and it was so aggressive and emotional, 0:49:17.360 --> 0:49:21.000 and I just couldn't because that time that I allocated 0:49:21.040 --> 0:49:22.920 it to the noise. 0:49:23.239 --> 0:49:25.920 I call it noise and call, and it was very painful. 0:49:26.960 --> 0:49:29.759 That time. I was losing time on how am I 0:49:29.920 --> 0:49:33.000 going to rebuild myself? Where do I put this energy? 0:49:33.040 --> 0:49:36.280 I had to put it on myself to process how. 0:49:37.160 --> 0:49:40.359 Anyone going in like relationship, It takes two, takes two 0:49:40.440 --> 0:49:42.440 to make it work, takes two to mess it up 0:49:42.960 --> 0:49:45.840 as well. So I'm not in denial. You have to 0:49:45.920 --> 0:49:48.920 take into account what you put in your role, you know, 0:49:49.000 --> 0:49:50.719 and exactly until you were. 0:49:50.760 --> 0:49:52.879 Just like, well, I guess I've been really doing all 0:49:52.920 --> 0:49:54.280 the wrong things and this is not working. 0:49:54.440 --> 0:49:55.120 So I'm out. 0:49:55.840 --> 0:49:58.400 And it's okay. It's okay for things not to be permanent. 0:49:58.480 --> 0:50:01.439 It's okay to outgrow each other and to say let's 0:50:01.480 --> 0:50:04.320 go our separate ways, let's not take this personal and 0:50:04.520 --> 0:50:08.520 just let's see how can we amicably continue our life 0:50:08.560 --> 0:50:12.279 and continue to raise our daughter and whatnot. But this 0:50:12.560 --> 0:50:18.000 time three years is taking me to truly rebuild everything 0:50:18.560 --> 0:50:21.359 where I've had to go back to school to learn 0:50:21.400 --> 0:50:24.880 about business management, to learn how I'm going to lead 0:50:24.920 --> 0:50:28.800 a team, to be a good mentor to learn areas 0:50:29.239 --> 0:50:32.600 that I didn't know and under and understood. But I 0:50:32.680 --> 0:50:35.800 have this big brain. If it's scary, because it's unknown. 0:50:35.880 --> 0:50:39.400 If it's scary, I don't know it. So three years 0:50:39.480 --> 0:50:44.279 of empowerment, how to run a business, partnerships, how to 0:50:44.360 --> 0:50:48.480 run partnerships that are symbiotic, they're all partnerships. Because all 0:50:48.600 --> 0:50:51.520 of those things, years and years and years of partnerships 0:50:51.560 --> 0:50:55.000 were all just gone. Contact lists, all of it was 0:50:55.080 --> 0:50:58.880 all gone. And I had to rebuild that and rebuild 0:50:59.000 --> 0:51:04.080 myself first. So I at some point I said, I'm 0:51:04.120 --> 0:51:04.360 going to. 0:51:04.400 --> 0:51:07.520 Quit it all. I don't want to be in the 0:51:08.960 --> 0:51:09.880 on TV anymore. 0:51:09.920 --> 0:51:11.920 I don't want to be this person that is sharing 0:51:12.000 --> 0:51:15.080 her life because I saw it and I saw the comments. 0:51:15.360 --> 0:51:16.920 It was crazy, and even to see. 0:51:16.760 --> 0:51:20.040 It from women right hating on you and like attacking 0:51:20.360 --> 0:51:23.560 from women, the things that people may say because you 0:51:23.640 --> 0:51:26.160 never know, you don't have the full story. I cheated 0:51:26.640 --> 0:51:27.040 I was the. 0:51:27.080 --> 0:51:32.120 One who left who It's like crazy allegations and I'm 0:51:32.200 --> 0:51:34.520 here a human being seeing all of this. 0:51:34.800 --> 0:51:36.839 Oh, I knew it was not real. 0:51:37.200 --> 0:51:39.560 I knew this was fake. Oh look, she had a 0:51:39.600 --> 0:51:45.480 perfect life, and what a human being? You know, you 0:51:45.640 --> 0:51:49.360 have no idea what I'm going through. And once I 0:51:49.520 --> 0:51:54.799 removed the anchors, it's been great and I wouldn't want 0:51:54.800 --> 0:51:56.919 to do it any other way. I'm going to teach 0:51:57.000 --> 0:52:01.440 my daughter how to be independent in how to be 0:52:01.520 --> 0:52:05.480 an asset. What's the point of staying in a marriage 0:52:05.560 --> 0:52:11.000 or staying in a relationship when it's not sustainable. So 0:52:11.320 --> 0:52:15.000 I just didn't want to. I made choices or choices. 0:52:16.239 --> 0:52:20.640 I didn't have to get married because I mean just 0:52:20.760 --> 0:52:25.840 didn't why because we were not there yet and I 0:52:25.920 --> 0:52:26.200 knew it. 0:52:26.400 --> 0:52:27.440 We were just not there yet. 0:52:27.560 --> 0:52:29.239 Did you feel like when you got married you had 0:52:29.280 --> 0:52:33.040 that fear like you kind of knew underlyingly that like 0:52:33.800 --> 0:52:36.160 not like it wouldn't work out, but that there was 0:52:36.280 --> 0:52:37.360 fear attached to it. 0:52:37.680 --> 0:52:39.720 There wasn't like for sure certainty. 0:52:40.080 --> 0:52:45.399 So there's this mutual contract that we have that we're 0:52:45.400 --> 0:52:47.399 going to remain best friends, that we're going to remain 0:52:47.480 --> 0:52:50.680 best the best to make decisions for our daughter, for 0:52:50.800 --> 0:52:53.799 our marriage, for the business that we're trying to grow, 0:52:54.560 --> 0:52:57.640 and to me, integrity is everything. And when at even 0:52:57.760 --> 0:53:00.799 feel like a moral compast was a line with mine 0:53:01.239 --> 0:53:03.600 and there was no integrity, I take the things that 0:53:03.719 --> 0:53:08.440 I do very serious, and I take risks on me. 0:53:10.080 --> 0:53:11.319 I bet on myself. 0:53:11.320 --> 0:53:13.640 Because I know that everything that I'm doing is stemming 0:53:13.719 --> 0:53:17.640 from passion in the education that I've put myself through 0:53:17.840 --> 0:53:21.759 all this time. And I work very hard. I sometimes, 0:53:21.840 --> 0:53:23.879 you know, I open my eyes. I'm taking my first 0:53:23.960 --> 0:53:26.719 vacation in the last seven years. 0:53:26.760 --> 0:53:27.000 Guys. 0:53:27.280 --> 0:53:32.680 Wow, yes, girl, Yeah, you are too hard for it 0:53:32.719 --> 0:53:34.759 to be seven years until you take a break. 0:53:35.160 --> 0:53:38.840 Well, I'm self funded for the past eleven years, you 0:53:38.920 --> 0:53:43.120 know I was able to. I don't know. 0:53:43.200 --> 0:53:46.040 I like to do things my way, and I've had 0:53:46.160 --> 0:53:52.080 opportunities to scale my company and scale it from like all. 0:53:52.000 --> 0:53:53.240 These investors and whatnot. 0:53:53.320 --> 0:53:55.279 But there's absolutely no way that I'm going to do 0:53:55.400 --> 0:53:57.880 that because I'm going to lose my voice and then 0:53:57.920 --> 0:53:59.840 I'm just going to become a cookie cutting version of 0:54:00.040 --> 0:54:03.880 everything that is out there instead of providing and keeping 0:54:03.960 --> 0:54:09.600 my voice completely just clean for the consumer. The right 0:54:09.680 --> 0:54:12.960 partner will come. The right investors will come one day, 0:54:13.480 --> 0:54:15.480 but I'm not there yet. I'm not ready. I had 0:54:15.520 --> 0:54:18.840 to rebuild eight years of a name in the industry, 0:54:19.360 --> 0:54:22.440 eight years of doing things in a certain way. At 0:54:22.480 --> 0:54:24.759 the craziest time was a pandemic when I had to 0:54:24.800 --> 0:54:27.200 do it all right. So there was a lot of 0:54:27.400 --> 0:54:31.279 me putting my head down to work, and not only 0:54:31.400 --> 0:54:35.040 to work, to make sure that everything was at a 0:54:35.160 --> 0:54:39.360 point where I felt safe. I needed to buy a 0:54:39.440 --> 0:54:41.320 home for my daughter. I was able to do that. 0:54:42.080 --> 0:54:45.320 I love what I do. We have a community like 0:54:45.400 --> 0:54:48.880 my tribe Miami Warrior community is a community just like 0:54:48.960 --> 0:54:52.160 you guys have your audience and we help each other 0:54:52.239 --> 0:54:55.959 with our stories and that's it. I have battered women 0:54:56.560 --> 0:55:00.800 on my like from nurses to the military, to battered 0:55:00.840 --> 0:55:04.640 women to too great professionals. 0:55:04.680 --> 0:55:07.200 I mean, there's it's a rainbow of women and we're 0:55:07.200 --> 0:55:09.640 a community where we help each other. 0:55:10.160 --> 0:55:12.160 So that to me is very important. And I'm a 0:55:12.200 --> 0:55:14.080 big feminist. I'm all here for family. 0:55:14.200 --> 0:55:17.000 Yeah, I think it's important to hear stories from women 0:55:17.160 --> 0:55:19.399 like you or just you know, like all types of women, 0:55:19.440 --> 0:55:22.920 because I think I think people have a perception. Now 0:55:23.000 --> 0:55:26.320 you're discipline you're strong. You have this amazing self funded 0:55:26.560 --> 0:55:29.080 life and business, and you've built this amazing tribe in 0:55:29.120 --> 0:55:32.560 this community and you know brand and you know, even 0:55:32.600 --> 0:55:36.480 those women get in situations and relationships and and you know, 0:55:36.520 --> 0:55:39.320 they look up and they're like, huh, I know, I'm smart, 0:55:39.360 --> 0:55:41.000 but this is getting tricky. 0:55:41.200 --> 0:55:43.200 Or like even I have gotten into. 0:55:43.080 --> 0:55:46.640 A relationship that's fucked up, even I have ignored red flags, 0:55:46.719 --> 0:55:48.920 even me myself, who's done this and that, and this 0:55:49.560 --> 0:55:53.960 my intuation came in and I I sided with the 0:55:54.200 --> 0:55:56.120 fact that I have a daughter and I want to 0:55:56.360 --> 0:55:58.120 build a family, and this is what it will looks like. 0:55:58.160 --> 0:55:59.400 And this is what the found, you know, and like 0:56:00.160 --> 0:56:03.760 it's like you have you have the wherewithal to understand 0:56:03.840 --> 0:56:05.840 when you're making a decision that's like maybe this is 0:56:05.880 --> 0:56:08.759 not my decision, but you have hopes of having a 0:56:09.000 --> 0:56:12.000 you know, a partner that's going to remain you know, 0:56:12.280 --> 0:56:14.920 respectful and amiblical. 0:56:14.600 --> 0:56:17.360 Amicable, And you know, I'm amicable. 0:56:16.880 --> 0:56:21.440 Ambilicable, and you know, and even you have made mistakes 0:56:21.440 --> 0:56:23.759 and not mistakes because obviously it's always for the better, 0:56:23.840 --> 0:56:25.760 it's always for the greater pick like the lesson. 0:56:25.840 --> 0:56:28.759 You know, mistakes are necessary so I mean they teach 0:56:28.840 --> 0:56:29.920 you that's experience. 0:56:30.080 --> 0:56:31.120 Good mom's bad choices. 0:56:31.200 --> 0:56:31.800 Baby about this. 0:56:31.920 --> 0:56:34.560 This is my first time being married, my first time 0:56:34.640 --> 0:56:37.440 being a mom. Who's telling you that you have to 0:56:37.520 --> 0:56:40.080 have a manual? It's your first time? So can we 0:56:40.239 --> 0:56:43.640 stop judging each other for our choices? We're gonna make 0:56:43.760 --> 0:56:48.560 that's life. Good choices, bad choices. How we steer and 0:56:48.760 --> 0:56:51.920 learn from these choices. I had to so no vacation 0:56:52.080 --> 0:56:56.040 for seven years. Guess what if I wanted to continue 0:56:56.080 --> 0:56:58.440 to be so funded and have a voice in my brand. 0:56:58.840 --> 0:57:01.080 I needed to put my head down because I was 0:57:01.200 --> 0:57:07.280 managing a lot of things, managing divorce, managing daughter, managing business, 0:57:07.520 --> 0:57:14.800 managing the run, the persona in the front of managing, 0:57:15.000 --> 0:57:19.160 managing a lot, and you have to put your head down. 0:57:19.280 --> 0:57:22.200 All the while someone's telling you, you know, if you 0:57:22.560 --> 0:57:24.240 if we're not together, look at your look at your 0:57:24.280 --> 0:57:26.640 desperate friends looking for men, You're gonna be just like them. 0:57:26.920 --> 0:57:29.680 I've heard that line very many times. That's why I'm triggered. 0:57:30.960 --> 0:57:33.080 But like you know, like just planning seeds of self 0:57:33.200 --> 0:57:37.080 doubt and planning seeds of you can't do this without me, 0:57:37.160 --> 0:57:38.800 even though you know that you can even though you've 0:57:38.800 --> 0:57:42.120 built this prior to this relationship, even though the brand 0:57:42.280 --> 0:57:44.760 is you. It's just like it's those like when you 0:57:45.040 --> 0:57:47.000 when you let somebody in and you trust them and 0:57:47.600 --> 0:57:49.680 you kind of feel safe with them, and you let 0:57:49.720 --> 0:57:52.840 them in on secrets and on businesses and on opportunities 0:57:52.920 --> 0:57:55.680 and partnerships. You give someone not to say never to 0:57:55.720 --> 0:57:58.920 trust anyone, you know, but the opportunity to fuck with 0:57:59.040 --> 0:58:01.960 you from the inside out, you know. So it's like 0:58:02.040 --> 0:58:03.840 you feel so close with someone and then you have 0:58:03.960 --> 0:58:06.360 this expectation because that's how you would be and that's 0:58:06.360 --> 0:58:07.760 how you would show up in a relationship. 0:58:08.040 --> 0:58:10.200 But then you see that, like everybody is not great, 0:58:10.480 --> 0:58:13.880 and that's why there is important and emotional intelligence that 0:58:14.040 --> 0:58:16.680 was extremely important two years of therapy to try to 0:58:16.720 --> 0:58:19.360 process everything you try to process like it, I'm blaming myself. 0:58:19.400 --> 0:58:22.120 I'm like, wait a second, I am too smart for this. 0:58:22.760 --> 0:58:24.080 When did this happen? 0:58:24.240 --> 0:58:24.400 Well? 0:58:24.720 --> 0:58:27.080 Wow, well I think even I think how I think 0:58:27.160 --> 0:58:29.000 because especially because of the brand you have and the 0:58:29.000 --> 0:58:30.680 message that you have in the honesty and all these 0:58:30.680 --> 0:58:33.280 things you have, you judge yourself even more. 0:58:33.600 --> 0:58:36.400 Yeah, Like I'm supposed to know the supposed to do 0:58:36.520 --> 0:58:36.880 this shit. 0:58:37.120 --> 0:58:40.800 Yeah, you get mean women not to like to empower themselves, 0:58:40.840 --> 0:58:42.480 to feel strong in their bodies, to feel strong in 0:58:42.480 --> 0:58:46.959 their minds. Meanwhile I'm feeling weak in mind realizing because 0:58:47.000 --> 0:58:51.560 it's like little cuts. It's like we interviewed already who 0:58:51.680 --> 0:58:53.520 she's and we talk about her in our book as well, 0:58:53.560 --> 0:58:56.720 and she is a narcissist expert, and she talks about 0:58:56.720 --> 0:58:59.280 how a lot of times narcissists it's like little paper 0:58:59.360 --> 0:59:03.040 cuts until suddenly you're bleeding everywhere. You didn't even realize it. 0:59:03.520 --> 0:59:05.280 And you know, I think a lot of women can 0:59:05.360 --> 0:59:08.160 relate to that, because sometimes it's not so black and white. 0:59:08.240 --> 0:59:10.560 It's not like oh he hit me, I'm out, or 0:59:10.680 --> 0:59:13.560 like yeah, or like he called me a bitch, like 0:59:13.560 --> 0:59:15.200 he called me but just ten times I shouldn't be 0:59:15.240 --> 0:59:19.200 here anymore. No, Sometimes it's just the little tiny things 0:59:19.320 --> 0:59:22.520 that they just start tapping away at your power. 0:59:22.800 --> 0:59:26.240 But think about this, how much power it takes to say, Okay, 0:59:26.760 --> 0:59:30.480 I'm out, you did that, but and it's over and 0:59:30.600 --> 0:59:34.000 guess what I'm doing better and better? 0:59:35.440 --> 0:59:35.560 Right? 0:59:36.040 --> 0:59:39.000 And that's the fear if you think about this, living 0:59:39.960 --> 0:59:44.040 so unhappy in a situation where you have it. We 0:59:44.160 --> 0:59:47.320 all have this gut feeling of things that are not 0:59:47.600 --> 0:59:51.680 aligning with our energy. So are you you're going to 0:59:51.720 --> 0:59:53.480 say that you're going to stain this for the rest 0:59:53.520 --> 0:59:57.920 of your life or going through that pain? Change is overwhelming. 0:59:58.040 --> 1:00:00.640 But if we want a different outcome, we're going to 1:00:00.760 --> 1:00:06.400 have to pivot. Right, And another nail popped off. But 1:00:07.280 --> 1:00:11.520 here's a very important you know, And to me, I 1:00:11.720 --> 1:00:15.360 was just judging myself, like, how like you knew this, 1:00:16.240 --> 1:00:19.760 You literally knew this, and here you are just because 1:00:19.800 --> 1:00:22.200 you don't like to be in zoom calls and manage people. 1:00:22.960 --> 1:00:27.080 Really get your act together, get out and this is 1:00:27.120 --> 1:00:30.440 what you're gonna teach your daughter, hopefully in Dara, who 1:00:30.640 --> 1:00:34.600 is a very intelligent child. My goal is to make 1:00:34.720 --> 1:00:37.680 a better version of myself in her, whatever she wants 1:00:37.720 --> 1:00:40.240 to be. So I've made this commitment to be a 1:00:40.320 --> 1:00:43.160 mom and it's the best thing ever and it comes 1:00:43.200 --> 1:00:46.880 with his challenges, right, but that's my little best friend. 1:00:47.240 --> 1:00:50.000 So I now I need to not only do it 1:00:50.160 --> 1:00:53.960 for the people who follow me, but do it for her, 1:00:54.080 --> 1:00:56.720 do it for my family, do it for myself. Right, 1:00:56.800 --> 1:00:59.080 I had to prove myself. You know, you get to 1:00:59.160 --> 1:01:02.960 the point where you've accomplished so much and now you're complacent. 1:01:03.480 --> 1:01:06.320 Okay, what's the next level. That was the next level. 1:01:07.080 --> 1:01:08.040 Look for your happiness. 1:01:08.440 --> 1:01:11.880 Let's go and the amount of learning and the empowering, 1:01:12.640 --> 1:01:18.080 the empowerment that I have right now, it's it's to 1:01:18.200 --> 1:01:20.960 another level being able. 1:01:21.080 --> 1:01:24.840 This is why, like I constantly tell women, put your energy. 1:01:25.720 --> 1:01:29.560 Look that energy that you have. We're all heartbroken, being 1:01:29.600 --> 1:01:35.080 broken up, live to belittled, all of that. It's awful and. 1:01:35.120 --> 1:01:37.120 You're gonna feel it. You're gonna start blaming yourself. You're 1:01:37.120 --> 1:01:41.560 gonna start it's it's tough. But that energy, you can 1:01:41.640 --> 1:01:42.880 put it towards the other person. 1:01:43.200 --> 1:01:45.440 This is happening to me or whatever. Take that freaking 1:01:45.600 --> 1:01:49.720 energy and channel it, transmit, channel. 1:01:49.400 --> 1:01:53.640 It to the point that what you're feeling, those big emotions, 1:01:54.120 --> 1:01:56.800 it's to actually get you to the other side. Oh 1:01:57.480 --> 1:02:00.240 you feel like this is going to break me, watch me, 1:02:01.240 --> 1:02:03.600 watch me, let me shut the noise. 1:02:04.080 --> 1:02:05.120 Do whatever you want to do. 1:02:05.800 --> 1:02:08.600 I'm going to focus on X y Z And that's 1:02:08.640 --> 1:02:11.800 what I did. Strategically, what do I need to do 1:02:11.960 --> 1:02:13.920 in order to continue to learn and in order to 1:02:13.960 --> 1:02:16.080 continue to be the best at what I do? 1:02:16.720 --> 1:02:17.120 Period? 1:02:17.360 --> 1:02:18.720 Because at the end of the day, Yes, I have 1:02:18.800 --> 1:02:21.320 a business, but people buy my business because it's symbiotic. 1:02:21.800 --> 1:02:27.760 You're getting something out of my services, and it's symbiotic 1:02:28.440 --> 1:02:28.920 you're winning. 1:02:29.040 --> 1:02:29.520 I'm winning. 1:02:30.760 --> 1:02:34.360 I always believe like ignorance is bliss, but education is power. 1:02:34.920 --> 1:02:37.600 So many women came out saying I'm dealing with the 1:02:37.640 --> 1:02:38.120 same thing. 1:02:38.760 --> 1:02:39.040 Women. 1:02:39.360 --> 1:02:43.520 There are colleagues of mine who's they have been stripped 1:02:43.720 --> 1:02:48.040 down to zero on food stamps. If it wasn't for 1:02:48.200 --> 1:02:54.560 therapy for the family circle that I have, I don't 1:02:54.640 --> 1:02:59.000 know if I would have been afloat because it took 1:02:59.560 --> 1:03:05.040 emotionally for three years. It was an emotional breakdown, and 1:03:05.160 --> 1:03:07.560 you have to process those things, and to. 1:03:09.280 --> 1:03:10.080 Have to see your. 1:03:10.040 --> 1:03:13.240 Daughter going through all of that and you're going through 1:03:13.320 --> 1:03:16.240 it and still hold it down to be a good 1:03:16.320 --> 1:03:19.800 mom when your heart is breaking, when your head is breaking, 1:03:20.520 --> 1:03:26.440 right when you're just so afraid and you're everything is 1:03:26.520 --> 1:03:31.640 coming at you, that's pretty tough. But learning how to 1:03:31.760 --> 1:03:36.320 go from the other side. My faith right faith had 1:03:36.320 --> 1:03:38.720 a lot to do with that. My circle had a 1:03:38.760 --> 1:03:41.240 lot to do with that. Therapy had a lot to 1:03:41.320 --> 1:03:45.560 do with me processing and coming out the other side stronger. 1:03:46.160 --> 1:03:46.880 What I'm telling you. 1:03:47.080 --> 1:03:47.360 It is. 1:03:47.640 --> 1:03:48.160 It is hard. 1:03:48.440 --> 1:03:50.520 It is a lot of putting your head down your 1:03:50.600 --> 1:03:53.560 desires as a person, right as a woman that you 1:03:53.680 --> 1:03:54.400 have desires. 1:03:55.680 --> 1:03:58.760 Imagine if it came to a breakup you were already 1:03:58.840 --> 1:03:59.800 checked out, right. 1:04:00.120 --> 1:04:02.480 And you're still a female, You're still a woman, you 1:04:02.600 --> 1:04:06.320 still have this concept that you're chasing of what does 1:04:06.400 --> 1:04:09.560 this family dynamic look like? I want a happy story 1:04:10.480 --> 1:04:12.840 for my daughter and I. How can I create this 1:04:13.520 --> 1:04:18.080 environment where it will not look like that anymore? But 1:04:18.200 --> 1:04:21.320 let's do something that looks like for us, it looks 1:04:21.400 --> 1:04:23.680 like a family right, And. 1:04:23.760 --> 1:04:24.320 It is tough. 1:04:24.920 --> 1:04:27.840 And the crying that I think I aged the past 1:04:27.880 --> 1:04:34.120 three years, No, seriously, the amount of crying, frustration, sleepless nights, burnouts, 1:04:34.800 --> 1:04:37.760 trying to help. People have no idea what I've gone through, 1:04:39.200 --> 1:04:43.240 and they would never see it, literally because at the 1:04:43.360 --> 1:04:46.360 end of the day, I'm pushing through and they're gonna know, 1:04:46.640 --> 1:04:49.640 you know, once I decide to write only strategies, right. 1:04:49.880 --> 1:04:53.320 They're gonna know. But it's this is how we get 1:04:53.360 --> 1:04:55.120 to the other side, by community, by talking. 1:04:55.440 --> 1:04:56.640 We have to, we have to. 1:04:56.880 --> 1:04:58.960 This has been like a savior for us, being able 1:04:59.040 --> 1:05:01.840 to show up on it, flee and like in friendship 1:05:01.960 --> 1:05:04.680 and just like the sister circles that we've been into, 1:05:04.800 --> 1:05:08.760 like bitch, I'm hurting, you know, like a bitch I'm hurting. 1:05:08.800 --> 1:05:11.640 I don't know, you know, And like but the strength 1:05:11.720 --> 1:05:15.920 and in the strength and power in the conversation in 1:05:16.040 --> 1:05:19.520 sisterhood and saying I got you and saying girl, me too, 1:05:19.680 --> 1:05:21.400 like You're not the only person this happened to. Like 1:05:21.800 --> 1:05:26.000 that shit is so powerful and truly it's like when 1:05:26.080 --> 1:05:29.200 these things happen, especially as moms, you know, especially as 1:05:29.280 --> 1:05:32.440 moms of daughters, it's like daughters heel and like when 1:05:32.480 --> 1:05:34.680 you look at a child in the face, especially as 1:05:34.720 --> 1:05:38.240 a woman, to a small woman, and you're like, there's 1:05:38.280 --> 1:05:40.120 no way in fucking hell I'm gonna let you see 1:05:40.160 --> 1:05:44.320 me stay miserable at the hand of somebody else, even 1:05:44.360 --> 1:05:45.160 if it is your daddy. 1:05:45.760 --> 1:05:48.360 You know that's gonna be her story. That will be 1:05:48.440 --> 1:05:50.640 her story now, absolutely not now. 1:05:50.720 --> 1:05:53.160 And you will inherit this half assed version of me 1:05:53.520 --> 1:05:56.240 because I've I've subjected you to my energy and we're 1:05:56.280 --> 1:05:59.200 connected no matter what. But if you transmit that energy, 1:05:59.280 --> 1:06:02.920 even if it's apart from that dad, that power in 1:06:03.480 --> 1:06:06.880 thenately inherits to your child, It's like, Oh. 1:06:06.800 --> 1:06:09.200 I see my mom move, move a bunch of shit around. 1:06:09.200 --> 1:06:10.320 I see my mom bounce. 1:06:10.360 --> 1:06:12.680 I see my mom break and build it back and 1:06:12.840 --> 1:06:16.959 build up multiple times, however, many times. And for women 1:06:17.040 --> 1:06:20.000 listening to this and who can relate, or are still 1:06:20.000 --> 1:06:22.320 in a relationship that no longer serves you, or at 1:06:22.360 --> 1:06:24.680 the very end of that relationship and right now you're like, 1:06:24.800 --> 1:06:25.600 oh shit, this is me. 1:06:26.480 --> 1:06:28.480 There is nothing stronger. 1:06:30.000 --> 1:06:33.640 Than picking up the pieces and doing that shit again, 1:06:33.720 --> 1:06:35.720 because the version of yourself that you see after that 1:06:36.680 --> 1:06:38.000 is the best version you'll ever see. 1:06:38.320 --> 1:06:40.760 And it will take. 1:06:42.120 --> 1:06:45.920 It will take a fucking ton to get you in 1:06:46.000 --> 1:06:48.720 the same spot in the same way. Like you know, 1:06:48.840 --> 1:06:51.520 fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice. Like 1:06:52.920 --> 1:06:55.440 the person I am coming out of my relationship with 1:06:55.520 --> 1:07:00.360 my child's father is one hundred million times strong than 1:07:00.400 --> 1:07:04.280 I was prior to that, because now I know nobody 1:07:04.400 --> 1:07:08.040 can break me. Yes, nobody can break me. Like when 1:07:08.160 --> 1:07:10.440 you're in those in the trenches and you're crying and 1:07:10.560 --> 1:07:13.919 you're you're at the bare minimum of yourself, you don't 1:07:14.200 --> 1:07:17.120 see or feel yourself anymore, and then you start to 1:07:17.240 --> 1:07:20.840 rediscover that part those parts of you that you had lost. 1:07:21.400 --> 1:07:24.320 There's no it's so hard for motherfucker to come in 1:07:24.400 --> 1:07:26.880 and take that away from you again. And you're that 1:07:27.040 --> 1:07:30.200 much more powerful. And like and like I said, I've 1:07:30.200 --> 1:07:31.800 said this before, I say this in the book, is like, 1:07:33.120 --> 1:07:36.480 once you choose you, once you choose your happiness, despite 1:07:36.520 --> 1:07:38.920 whoever told you it's not important, somebody is going to 1:07:38.960 --> 1:07:41.400 tell you that your happiness is not important, probably the 1:07:41.440 --> 1:07:44.880 person benefiting from your unhappiness. But when you start to 1:07:45.040 --> 1:07:49.200 reclaim those pieces of you, slowly and surely, the gravitation 1:07:49.400 --> 1:07:51.920 of all the things you want is so fucking powerful. 1:07:52.160 --> 1:07:57.480 Like women, for lack of better words, were alchemists. 1:07:57.960 --> 1:08:02.040 And when you choose you, you choose automatically everything else 1:08:02.080 --> 1:08:04.560 that benefits you, and it comes, it starts to come 1:08:04.640 --> 1:08:07.200 to you without much effort. But you have to let 1:08:07.280 --> 1:08:10.280 go of the shit that no longer serves you, even 1:08:10.320 --> 1:08:12.120 if it's the person you thought was closest to you. 1:08:13.160 --> 1:08:15.919 Hereie, and this is how you pretty much how you learn. 1:08:16.120 --> 1:08:17.880 I feel like I went to the school of life. 1:08:18.760 --> 1:08:23.479 I've had not a lot of relationships, so my. 1:08:23.560 --> 1:08:27.720 Relationships are long. You're one of those. I'm one of those. 1:08:28.360 --> 1:08:29.240 I believe in tradition. 1:08:29.800 --> 1:08:33.599 I believe in traditional values, right, and now I exactly 1:08:33.760 --> 1:08:36.880 know exactly what I want and I can see it 1:08:36.920 --> 1:08:37.519 a mile away. 1:08:38.640 --> 1:08:39.639 I see it a mile away. 1:08:39.680 --> 1:08:41.680 And this is why, like earlier you ask me if 1:08:41.680 --> 1:08:43.960 I had a celebritial crush and whatnot. And it is 1:08:44.040 --> 1:08:46.160 so funny because you're here in La in the little pocket. 1:08:46.439 --> 1:08:49.759 Everybody knows everybody, and you know they have this idea 1:08:49.840 --> 1:08:52.040 of you. And I've been set up in so many 1:08:52.120 --> 1:08:55.000 different dates and with people, and I'm just like, wow, 1:08:56.080 --> 1:08:58.040 you have these accolades, you have all these money, you 1:08:58.120 --> 1:08:59.600 have all these fame, and you will have all this, 1:08:59.760 --> 1:09:04.200 but you you have nothing, no substance, nothing, And now 1:09:04.400 --> 1:09:06.960 I can just say I know exactly what I want, 1:09:07.479 --> 1:09:11.080 what I would accept, and no, thank you. I have 1:09:11.479 --> 1:09:15.160 a personal like you have to when you see yourself 1:09:15.200 --> 1:09:18.160 in patterns, and I saw myself in a pattern saving people. 1:09:19.040 --> 1:09:19.920 And now I understand. 1:09:19.960 --> 1:09:26.240 I understood, Hey, you're deserving of someone who's matching your values, 1:09:26.640 --> 1:09:30.080 your moral compass, who you are as a person. If 1:09:30.280 --> 1:09:34.479 that doesn't match who you are, it's not sustainable. Because 1:09:34.479 --> 1:09:36.840 at some point I understood I don't care how to 1:09:37.040 --> 1:09:41.920 I have no type. My type is I'm as satissexual. 1:09:42.160 --> 1:09:45.679 I like intelligence. That's what brings me to the next 1:09:45.720 --> 1:09:49.240 person you know, or or allures me to someone. If 1:09:49.240 --> 1:09:51.160 you can teach me something, if we can grow together, 1:09:51.240 --> 1:09:54.720 if you Yeah. But now it's just like now I know, 1:09:55.160 --> 1:09:57.920 I know what I want when I see it, how 1:09:58.000 --> 1:10:01.040 it's packaged, how it's presented. That is about actions and 1:10:01.120 --> 1:10:03.240 net words. You can tell me anything, Okay, I'm just 1:10:03.320 --> 1:10:07.080 here listening. Okay, let me see how those words are 1:10:07.120 --> 1:10:10.120 going to translate into actions. What you do, the little 1:10:10.160 --> 1:10:12.920 things that you do every day, right, how you treat others. 1:10:13.560 --> 1:10:16.920 How's your relationship with your significant others, meaning your family, 1:10:17.280 --> 1:10:21.240 your siblings, your friends, How you talk about people right, 1:10:21.560 --> 1:10:25.040 how you treat other people, how you treat yourself, yourself 1:10:25.760 --> 1:10:28.519 and even your parents. Because I want a family. To me, 1:10:28.680 --> 1:10:33.200 that's the ultimate goal. And family can look very different 1:10:33.560 --> 1:10:36.040 right to me. My family right now, it's Indian. I 1:10:36.360 --> 1:10:40.720 that's our family. But if I ever Indira has yet 1:10:40.840 --> 1:10:45.200 to meet someone, she doesn't know anyone but her father, 1:10:46.920 --> 1:10:50.080 that's it. The day that she ever meets someone is 1:10:50.160 --> 1:10:53.080 because that's the one and I want it just that way, 1:10:53.640 --> 1:10:56.479 because she needs to understand, like if someone doesn't treat 1:10:56.520 --> 1:10:59.240 you well. You wait up until the person that's going 1:10:59.280 --> 1:11:02.799 to treat you well, because I'm making myself an asset. 1:11:03.200 --> 1:11:07.559 Especially now you have to have two breadwinners, like both 1:11:07.720 --> 1:11:09.439 men and women. That's that's it. 1:11:10.280 --> 1:11:14.639 If you are both an acid to each other, you're 1:11:14.680 --> 1:11:17.360 not leaving that because you're growing together. 1:11:17.400 --> 1:11:18.000 You're an acid. 1:11:18.360 --> 1:11:20.320 You're not looking at your partner and saying like we're 1:11:20.560 --> 1:11:23.280 all of this. Lack when the balance is uneven is 1:11:23.360 --> 1:11:28.519 when you start becoming unhappy. Right, So to me, I 1:11:28.720 --> 1:11:31.080 wanted to go through those experiences, not that I want it, 1:11:31.200 --> 1:11:33.320 but going through them now you're. 1:11:33.840 --> 1:11:36.600 Now I am lucky. You need I need Yeah, I 1:11:36.680 --> 1:11:37.000 needed to. 1:11:37.120 --> 1:11:40.720 I mean I have no experience literally, people that know me. 1:11:40.840 --> 1:11:42.840 I grew up in a household where I went to 1:11:42.920 --> 1:11:47.920 Catholic school. My skirts down to here I had to. Yeah, 1:11:48.080 --> 1:11:50.920 that was my mom growing up. No, you can't shave 1:11:50.960 --> 1:11:53.559 your legs until you're like sixteen or whatnot. 1:11:54.080 --> 1:11:57.120 You can't. Yeah, that's how I grew up. So it's 1:11:57.240 --> 1:11:58.680 very limited in the experience that I have. 1:11:58.800 --> 1:12:01.439 But now you know I've been Do you think you're 1:12:01.439 --> 1:12:04.240 going to adopt your mom's way of like raising your 1:12:04.320 --> 1:12:07.240 daughter like as strict as Catholic school, as like as 1:12:07.400 --> 1:12:09.400 as traditional as you were raised. 1:12:10.760 --> 1:12:14.439 No, I'm raising my daughter completely the opposite. And my 1:12:14.600 --> 1:12:15.960 daughter and I are like best friends. 1:12:16.400 --> 1:12:17.200 She has a voice. 1:12:17.360 --> 1:12:20.559 I respect her, whereas in your house is like I'm 1:12:20.600 --> 1:12:23.559 the adult and this last say. 1:12:23.680 --> 1:12:25.080 How how does that work? 1:12:25.280 --> 1:12:25.360 Right? 1:12:25.479 --> 1:12:28.880 She's an individual, right, She's literally a little individual with 1:12:28.960 --> 1:12:31.880 her own mind, and she has her personality. 1:12:32.160 --> 1:12:34.240 Do you think some of that? Do you think being 1:12:34.360 --> 1:12:34.960 raised that way? 1:12:35.080 --> 1:12:37.240 I mean, and granted we're all raised, our parents are 1:12:37.320 --> 1:12:38.680 raised the way they were raised, and we're like the 1:12:38.720 --> 1:12:41.120 first generation that's like, huh, I might be able to 1:12:41.200 --> 1:12:43.280 change this. Some some things need to shift. Like we're 1:12:43.320 --> 1:12:47.360 so we have so much like information about just there's 1:12:47.360 --> 1:12:49.800 so much awareness that our parents maybe didn't have. But 1:12:49.960 --> 1:12:52.639 do you think that in ways that like that heavy 1:12:53.360 --> 1:12:59.280 traditional you know, like upbringing played a part in trying 1:12:59.360 --> 1:13:04.360 to make your marriage work for so long, possibly like 1:13:04.720 --> 1:13:06.800 sticking to the rules and the way that and when 1:13:06.840 --> 1:13:08.640 she thought you were supposed to show up as a 1:13:08.680 --> 1:13:10.799 wife and as a woman for the family. 1:13:11.280 --> 1:13:12.880 If I would have listened to my mom, I would 1:13:12.880 --> 1:13:15.439 have never gotten into that. So I should have listened. 1:13:15.760 --> 1:13:17.200 Oh, your mom told me everything. 1:13:17.400 --> 1:13:21.160 Your mom told you the opposite, okayaid the opposite. 1:13:22.600 --> 1:13:25.200 But hey, you go to school, then you graduate, and then. 1:13:25.160 --> 1:13:27.240 You meet prince, then you meet this. That's how she 1:13:27.360 --> 1:13:29.680 wanted me to do it right. And then I went 1:13:29.840 --> 1:13:34.120 against the green and that was just not It just didn't. 1:13:33.880 --> 1:13:34.680 Work for me. 1:13:34.880 --> 1:13:36.479 She told you to marry him, and she told you 1:13:36.560 --> 1:13:36.760 do not. 1:13:37.800 --> 1:13:41.439 She didn't want that path I moved in before I 1:13:41.800 --> 1:13:45.040 exactly like all of that, you know, and she went 1:13:45.160 --> 1:13:48.639 she would have preferred very traditional. And to that point, 1:13:48.840 --> 1:13:52.040 I will raise Indie in a traditional way that she 1:13:52.600 --> 1:13:56.759 knows how valuable she is as. 1:13:56.640 --> 1:14:00.639 A female, you know. And the way that I'm rasing 1:14:00.720 --> 1:14:08.799 hers to be just academically, just and emotionally just just bigger. 1:14:08.920 --> 1:14:10.640 She needs to think, well now that she needs to. 1:14:11.400 --> 1:14:14.840 But teaching her about emotional intelligence, my daughter is like 1:14:15.120 --> 1:14:18.400 heavily in tune with emotions. She will sit there and 1:14:18.560 --> 1:14:21.960 she is the most well behaved child. She'll have a 1:14:22.000 --> 1:14:25.640 full conversation with you. She's just racing her. 1:14:26.120 --> 1:14:28.120 Saw this beautiful clip of you guys, and it like 1:14:28.240 --> 1:14:29.800 kind of brought me to tears. It was like you 1:14:29.840 --> 1:14:33.040 were in the bathroom and she I guess she got 1:14:33.080 --> 1:14:34.559 it you were during her hair and she got emotional 1:14:34.600 --> 1:14:35.880 because she didn't want to leave you. I don't know 1:14:35.920 --> 1:14:38.879 if it was like a parent co parent drop off situation, 1:14:39.000 --> 1:14:41.840 because I've experienced that too with my daughter early on, 1:14:42.160 --> 1:14:44.320 where you know, she's just so used to being with me, 1:14:45.120 --> 1:14:49.559 and you know that exchange would sometimes be a bit 1:14:49.600 --> 1:14:52.920 traumatizing for her in ways, and traumatizing for me too, 1:14:53.680 --> 1:14:56.640 and her vocalizing like I don't want to go, you know, 1:14:56.840 --> 1:14:58.559 and then you know him being like, well you're coming, 1:14:59.000 --> 1:15:00.640 you know, and just like, oh my god, this is 1:15:00.720 --> 1:15:03.760 so fucking I never thought we'd be here. But I 1:15:03.840 --> 1:15:05.360 just thought it was so beautiful how you were able 1:15:05.400 --> 1:15:07.639 to support her, and how she was able to kind 1:15:07.680 --> 1:15:10.720 of affirm you as well too. And she said, you're like, 1:15:10.800 --> 1:15:13.320 tell me what I can do, you know better for 1:15:13.439 --> 1:15:16.439 you as your mother, and she said you're already amazing. Yeah, 1:15:16.560 --> 1:15:19.679 And I was like like, literally, I'm gonna get teary 1:15:19.720 --> 1:15:21.599 eyed thinking about it right now, with such a beautiful 1:15:21.640 --> 1:15:25.679 moment that like such a young little human is able 1:15:25.760 --> 1:15:27.640 to vocalize that, And I think there's a lot of 1:15:28.040 --> 1:15:30.920 there's a lot of children that can, but it's about 1:15:31.200 --> 1:15:34.479 asking those questions too as a mother and saying how 1:15:34.560 --> 1:15:37.200 can I support you? Better? Don't I don't have it 1:15:37.240 --> 1:15:39.040 all figured out, like guide me in ways? And I 1:15:39.080 --> 1:15:41.360 think as parents and as mothers, sometimes we think that 1:15:41.439 --> 1:15:42.680 we have to have it all figured out. We don't 1:15:42.680 --> 1:15:44.400 want to ask our children those questions because at some 1:15:44.520 --> 1:15:48.200 point it somehow makes us feel or maybe makes us 1:15:48.240 --> 1:15:49.880 feel like they're going to think we don't know what 1:15:49.960 --> 1:15:50.400 we're doing. 1:15:50.760 --> 1:15:52.920 Yeah, because we don't. Yeah, we don't. 1:15:52.960 --> 1:15:54.960 It's like, think about this, Like for the moms that 1:15:55.040 --> 1:15:56.840 are listened to us, it's your first time. 1:15:57.000 --> 1:15:57.200 Yeah. 1:15:57.280 --> 1:15:59.360 I always say, I am seven year I'm a seven 1:15:59.439 --> 1:16:01.040 year old mother, and I'm an eight year old mom. 1:16:01.120 --> 1:16:03.640 Now I'm an eight year old mom. I only know 1:16:03.760 --> 1:16:05.240 as much as I know, and. 1:16:05.320 --> 1:16:07.640 You're just learning as it goes. But one of the 1:16:07.760 --> 1:16:12.519 things that I honestly I've to me, I love people. 1:16:13.680 --> 1:16:16.439 I love learning about people, I love talking to people, 1:16:17.160 --> 1:16:18.720 I love connecting. 1:16:19.400 --> 1:16:22.160 This is why I love my job. There's nothing that 1:16:22.160 --> 1:16:25.240 I would see myself doing. I just love it. I 1:16:25.360 --> 1:16:26.080 am so passionate. 1:16:26.120 --> 1:16:29.120 I wake up every single day like now when it's stressful, 1:16:29.120 --> 1:16:31.640 you know, sometimes again it's stressful, but I love what 1:16:31.720 --> 1:16:34.719 I do and one of the things that I really 1:16:34.920 --> 1:16:39.320 really did not want to end up doing. Our parents 1:16:39.360 --> 1:16:41.360 didn't have the tools that we have right now. Millennials 1:16:41.400 --> 1:16:43.840 really killed it, you know, we really did something, but 1:16:45.439 --> 1:16:48.720 they didn't have the tools to build emotional intelligence. So 1:16:48.760 --> 1:16:51.960 I'm telling all the moms out there, whether your child 1:16:52.040 --> 1:16:55.320 is one years old or eight, learn how they're developing 1:16:56.479 --> 1:17:00.120 in their minds. Developmentally. You have a frontal lobe that 1:17:00.560 --> 1:17:05.120 gets mature right at the age of twenty five. This 1:17:05.280 --> 1:17:08.040 is why children and young people we act well, we 1:17:08.680 --> 1:17:13.160 pass the twenty five, but they act so erratic, right 1:17:13.479 --> 1:17:16.880 because this is not fully developed. So in order to 1:17:16.960 --> 1:17:19.720 save yourself some frustration, why is your kid why you're 1:17:19.720 --> 1:17:21.920 telling your kid ten thousand times to pick that up 1:17:21.960 --> 1:17:24.439 and they do it every day, right, and you're just 1:17:25.160 --> 1:17:29.439 repeating the cycle, learn how they're developing mentally. That way, 1:17:30.000 --> 1:17:32.280 you're learning like, oh, I have to tell her a 1:17:32.360 --> 1:17:36.479 thousand times because this part of the brain is not developed. Oh, 1:17:36.760 --> 1:17:39.320 she tells me that she's forgetting, and now she forgot 1:17:39.439 --> 1:17:42.800 because of this. Oh, they're not able to understand time 1:17:43.080 --> 1:17:43.840 or this or that. 1:17:44.120 --> 1:17:44.280 Oh. 1:17:44.439 --> 1:17:48.360 So it saved me so much stress not getting from 1:17:48.439 --> 1:17:50.560 like oh no, that's what you're supposed to do. 1:17:50.680 --> 1:17:55.720 Okay, good, And I just treat my daughter with you know, 1:17:55.800 --> 1:17:58.080 there's this industry versus. 1:17:57.920 --> 1:18:05.560 Inferiority, inferior there you go take it away, industry versus inferiority. 1:18:06.439 --> 1:18:07.880 Okay, you know so, yeah, you know. 1:18:08.520 --> 1:18:14.759 So your children from age to six, from six to twelve, 1:18:14.800 --> 1:18:19.479 I believe six to twelve, they are looking, they're they're 1:18:19.640 --> 1:18:24.439 forming their identity. And even you can see when your 1:18:24.520 --> 1:18:26.360 kid is doing something that they knew they were not 1:18:26.400 --> 1:18:29.000 supposed to do, they're looking at you for a reaction. 1:18:29.920 --> 1:18:33.519 All she gets from me is a neutral reaction, just neutral, 1:18:34.000 --> 1:18:36.160 even though I've lost it a couple of times, like 1:18:36.240 --> 1:18:40.759 oh my god, right, but it's neutral. And India shares 1:18:40.800 --> 1:18:46.479 with me everything, everything, everything. Hopefully that extends up until 1:18:46.520 --> 1:18:49.479 she's an adult, because I'm going to teach her, yeah, 1:18:49.680 --> 1:18:51.680 in school and I we're going to teach you how 1:18:51.720 --> 1:18:53.600 to be book smart. Let me teach you how to 1:18:53.680 --> 1:18:57.760 be street smart, how to deal with humans, how to 1:18:57.960 --> 1:19:02.160 understand other humans, because you're going to have to interact 1:19:02.600 --> 1:19:05.080 with humans all day, with people. 1:19:04.880 --> 1:19:05.400 That do not. 1:19:07.200 --> 1:19:07.920 Know who you are. 1:19:08.479 --> 1:19:12.240 Have your upbringing, like different things that you do, have 1:19:12.439 --> 1:19:16.360 different morals and values and just completely different. And you 1:19:16.479 --> 1:19:18.120 have to let people be who they are and not 1:19:18.200 --> 1:19:21.200 take things personal and be you know, she's a little 1:19:21.200 --> 1:19:26.360 Pissi's water baby, right, so highly emotional and that's I 1:19:26.400 --> 1:19:27.640 feel like she has a superpower. 1:19:27.760 --> 1:19:28.280 She's gonna be. 1:19:28.479 --> 1:19:31.360 She's probably gonna be I don't know, in the art, 1:19:32.320 --> 1:19:37.520 something artistic and creative or something about people, something related. 1:19:37.200 --> 1:19:39.080 To people and humans. 1:19:39.160 --> 1:19:42.439 But I highly suggest all the moms listening to me 1:19:42.680 --> 1:19:47.800 right now, please get yourself some books. There's plenty out there. 1:19:47.960 --> 1:19:50.240 Maybe we should create a list right for the rest, 1:19:50.439 --> 1:19:54.640 but for your child's development, even when they're teenagers. 1:19:56.760 --> 1:19:57.720 I know that that's going to be. 1:19:58.000 --> 1:19:59.759 People call it like, oh my god, it's so hard 1:20:00.280 --> 1:20:01.880 and oh my god, like the kids, I have to 1:20:01.960 --> 1:20:03.960 like drink my wine because the kids are acting up. 1:20:04.000 --> 1:20:07.920 You should mean Indy, India is just and you do 1:20:08.080 --> 1:20:09.559 that through behavioral change. 1:20:09.800 --> 1:20:12.360 Well, I think if you're investing, it's like twofold, like 1:20:12.400 --> 1:20:14.479 you've got to invest. We're talking earlier about investing in 1:20:14.560 --> 1:20:17.040 yourself and your mental health and your wealth and your 1:20:17.120 --> 1:20:20.360 mind and your body, and it's like you've also decided 1:20:20.400 --> 1:20:22.960 to bring this life earth side. You have to also 1:20:23.160 --> 1:20:26.280 invest in you've chosen to be a parent, invest in 1:20:27.040 --> 1:20:30.960 understanding how you can also make them the best version 1:20:31.000 --> 1:20:33.479 of themselves so that they're not having to do all 1:20:33.600 --> 1:20:36.920 this rebuilding in their late twenties and thirties and going 1:20:36.960 --> 1:20:39.120 to therapy. I mean, granted, maybe the therapy is good 1:20:39.160 --> 1:20:42.559 for even the most you know, well adjusted child a person, 1:20:42.720 --> 1:20:46.559 but hopefully the goal is to make our children better 1:20:46.600 --> 1:20:48.639 than us, right and to like really do the work 1:20:48.720 --> 1:20:51.320 to figure out what that is. To know that these 1:20:51.479 --> 1:20:54.639 are our souls coming through us that are not exactly 1:20:54.760 --> 1:20:56.000 like us, so we're not going to be able to 1:20:56.040 --> 1:20:57.720 parent them the ways that we thought we needed to 1:20:57.720 --> 1:20:58.800 be parent that we didn't get. 1:20:59.160 --> 1:21:02.400 I mean, even then, we're only parented as much. The 1:21:02.479 --> 1:21:04.840 only example of parenting is what we got. And then 1:21:04.880 --> 1:21:06.519 it takes for us to get old enough and mature 1:21:06.600 --> 1:21:09.200 enough to evaluate that parenting and say, what did that 1:21:09.280 --> 1:21:11.840 really work for me? Were those the ways in which 1:21:11.960 --> 1:21:14.160 I thrived? Or what did that hurt me in ways? 1:21:14.240 --> 1:21:16.479 That was that traumatic for me? Because I didn't receive 1:21:16.600 --> 1:21:20.320 this emotional patience or all these things that I wish 1:21:20.360 --> 1:21:22.439 I could have had. And it's like it's difficult because, 1:21:22.439 --> 1:21:24.840 like we said, there's no guidebook, but also the only 1:21:24.920 --> 1:21:27.080 example is what you got. And then you'll find yourself 1:21:27.360 --> 1:21:30.320 in motherhood doing things that mimic mimic your parents that 1:21:30.400 --> 1:21:32.719 you don't even agree with, and you have to catch yourself. 1:21:32.760 --> 1:21:37.080 And it's like mothering yourself as an adult in ways 1:21:37.120 --> 1:21:40.320 you maybe weren't mothered growing up is like one thing, 1:21:40.479 --> 1:21:43.479 and then also mothering an actual child at the same time. 1:21:43.880 --> 1:21:46.040 It's a hell of a job, but it's necessary in 1:21:46.200 --> 1:21:49.320 order to like mothering yourself in order to show up 1:21:49.600 --> 1:21:52.360 in a way that's supportive, in a way that's patient, 1:21:52.640 --> 1:21:55.040 in a way that is you know, when you're running 1:21:55.040 --> 1:21:57.960 a business and relationships, all these other things that you 1:21:58.080 --> 1:22:01.880 still have these to give to your child. To not 1:22:02.040 --> 1:22:04.280 be like I'm I'm done for the day. You know, 1:22:04.479 --> 1:22:06.639 it's like, no, actually, this is the most important fucking 1:22:06.720 --> 1:22:09.439 job you have. And so the more tools you have, 1:22:09.720 --> 1:22:13.240 it gives you the opportunity to kind of like find 1:22:13.479 --> 1:22:15.680 new ways to parent and realize it doesn't have to 1:22:15.760 --> 1:22:17.519 look exactly like the way you were parented. 1:22:18.080 --> 1:22:20.080 Well, and also the circumstances are different too. I mean, 1:22:20.120 --> 1:22:22.280 like you came from a I think a two parent household, right, 1:22:22.760 --> 1:22:25.840 and who's the bond is strong. And now you're raising 1:22:26.800 --> 1:22:29.080 we're divorced. Yeah, three years old they divorced, but but 1:22:29.560 --> 1:22:32.840 you had it. But but I've been thinking, like about 1:22:32.920 --> 1:22:35.240 your you're a single parent, like you have your daughter. 1:22:35.280 --> 1:22:37.360 It's just you two in the house. Her needs or 1:22:37.439 --> 1:22:39.439 might be different than the needs that you have. And 1:22:39.760 --> 1:22:42.640 sometimes you don't even know because this is all you know. 1:22:42.960 --> 1:22:45.160 You have to educate yourself, like you do need to 1:22:45.200 --> 1:22:47.240 read a book, you do need to listen to a podcast. 1:22:47.600 --> 1:22:49.320 You do need to tap in with you know, and 1:22:49.640 --> 1:22:52.519 get different perspectives because what works for you might not 1:22:52.640 --> 1:22:55.080 work for indie, you know, and like you might see 1:22:55.080 --> 1:22:57.360 it start to play out like and any mother might 1:22:57.360 --> 1:22:58.880 see to play out like, oh, well this really worked 1:22:58.880 --> 1:23:00.720 for me, but for some reason it's not. It's not 1:23:00.880 --> 1:23:02.720 doing what it's supposed to be doing here. How do 1:23:02.800 --> 1:23:04.599 I need to shift? How do I need to adjust? 1:23:04.720 --> 1:23:07.040 Like because even my daughter, she's a rule follower, I'm 1:23:07.120 --> 1:23:10.320 not really like there's elements of me that are for sure, 1:23:10.360 --> 1:23:12.280 but there's things about her I'm like, are you my daughter? 1:23:12.479 --> 1:23:13.240 Like what the fuck is this? 1:23:13.560 --> 1:23:13.720 You know? 1:23:13.800 --> 1:23:15.880 And I have to honor that part of her and 1:23:16.000 --> 1:23:18.960 not try to force her to be like, well, this 1:23:19.080 --> 1:23:19.840 is easier for me. 1:23:20.560 --> 1:23:21.280 It's easier for. 1:23:21.400 --> 1:23:23.680 Me if you just like get on board with this, 1:23:24.640 --> 1:23:26.080 you know, and it's like, well, this is not this 1:23:26.200 --> 1:23:27.240 is not her human design. 1:23:28.080 --> 1:23:28.240 You know. 1:23:28.320 --> 1:23:30.439 I can't go against that, or I could and then 1:23:30.640 --> 1:23:31.880 what the fuck's gonna happen there? 1:23:32.240 --> 1:23:32.400 You know. 1:23:32.400 --> 1:23:34.799 It's really funny when I see like memes on Instagram 1:23:34.880 --> 1:23:38.040 about like when kids talk too much, especially around this age, 1:23:38.120 --> 1:23:41.080 and like the parents like h right, but actually have 1:23:41.200 --> 1:23:42.160 conversations with Indian. 1:23:42.240 --> 1:23:44.439 She's super dope. She tells me about her day. 1:23:44.479 --> 1:23:47.479 I can find out even when she's insecured about certain things. 1:23:48.400 --> 1:23:52.519 I can find out anything through just her talking and 1:23:52.640 --> 1:23:55.640 he sur vibe just hearing her and I did this 1:23:55.760 --> 1:23:57.840 at school and that and that and that. But in 1:23:58.240 --> 1:24:01.400 having these conversations with her, I know what she needs 1:24:01.479 --> 1:24:02.000 to be happy. 1:24:03.040 --> 1:24:03.200 You know. 1:24:04.160 --> 1:24:08.120 After three pm, my day is done. Like that's it. 1:24:08.400 --> 1:24:10.320 My phone goes like this, I wake up really early, 1:24:10.920 --> 1:24:14.200 So these are the sacrifices, Like I wake up five 1:24:14.520 --> 1:24:17.200 five forty five, from five to five forty five, that's it. 1:24:17.800 --> 1:24:20.200 But then my day I start a day early, but 1:24:20.360 --> 1:24:22.519 my day ends when I pick her up from school. 1:24:23.040 --> 1:24:26.040 So you can be I think in the three years 1:24:26.080 --> 1:24:29.759 that she's been in school now, probably I have missed 1:24:30.760 --> 1:24:33.280 maybe two or three picking her up and dropping her off. 1:24:33.760 --> 1:24:36.920 And he's usually either my brother or like, I don't. 1:24:36.760 --> 1:24:38.240 Have an nan, I don't have a nanny. I don't 1:24:38.240 --> 1:24:39.760 have I do all of it right. 1:24:40.439 --> 1:24:45.439 She my nanny's the school right and it's important to me. 1:24:45.680 --> 1:24:48.040 So these are sacrifices that I now I have to like, Okay, 1:24:48.080 --> 1:24:51.280 I have to pivot. If I can't be an absent mother, 1:24:52.000 --> 1:24:55.240 I can't be a workaholic and be absent because we 1:24:55.439 --> 1:24:56.200 know what that does. 1:24:56.760 --> 1:24:58.920 And I'm saying, like, it's not what I'm going to 1:24:59.000 --> 1:25:02.439 be doing. Most of the time. I'm going to miss 1:25:02.600 --> 1:25:04.519 some dates, that's a given. 1:25:04.920 --> 1:25:07.280 I am going to have to work late some days, 1:25:07.640 --> 1:25:09.640 but most of the time, she's going to remember a 1:25:09.760 --> 1:25:12.439 mom that went to pick her up, dropped her off. 1:25:12.720 --> 1:25:15.479 Whatever sacrifices I needed to make, I'll make him. I'll 1:25:15.560 --> 1:25:20.120 start waking up earlier, I'll put my phone down, and 1:25:20.240 --> 1:25:21.640 then that's it. There's some days that I have to 1:25:21.680 --> 1:25:24.160 tell her, like, hey, mommy has to work, you know, 1:25:24.240 --> 1:25:26.439 and he's going to go over. But we have a routine. 1:25:26.520 --> 1:25:28.599 We have built a routine. It's just like I've become 1:25:28.720 --> 1:25:33.360 pretty much a robot. But I can control those things 1:25:33.439 --> 1:25:37.479 because I have a sustainable approach to a schedule. 1:25:38.360 --> 1:25:40.840 Hopefully she'ld be on vacation. 1:25:40.720 --> 1:25:43.680 Since you will be on vacation soon and I command it. 1:25:43.800 --> 1:25:46.200 How are you going to fit dating into your schedule? Like? 1:25:46.280 --> 1:25:47.960 How does dating fit into you? Know? 1:25:48.200 --> 1:25:50.280 This well oiled machine. 1:25:50.520 --> 1:25:53.080 I co parents, So fifty percent of the time I 1:25:53.360 --> 1:25:57.320 I having Durrah and fifty percent of the time she 1:25:57.479 --> 1:26:01.080 goes with her dad. Okay, right, we don't know if 1:26:01.120 --> 1:26:04.880 that's going to change. But managing dating, I like very. 1:26:04.840 --> 1:26:11.320 Busy people because you're busy exactly, So managing dating, I 1:26:11.400 --> 1:26:14.519 have enough. I have like a whole week to myself 1:26:14.640 --> 1:26:14.920 to do that. 1:26:15.120 --> 1:26:18.000 Do you feel like it's something that you want to 1:26:18.040 --> 1:26:18.479 do right now? 1:26:19.160 --> 1:26:21.559 Are you feeling like I would like companionship, I wouldn't 1:26:21.600 --> 1:26:24.160 mind someone courting me. Or are you just like I'm 1:26:24.240 --> 1:26:26.840 still like knee deep and getting my life where I 1:26:26.920 --> 1:26:29.000 need it to be after this, No, I got my 1:26:29.040 --> 1:26:31.000 life where I need it to be. So you're you're 1:26:31.080 --> 1:26:32.400 open to companionship. 1:26:32.880 --> 1:26:34.840 I'm open to the right type of company. 1:26:34.960 --> 1:26:38.240 Yeah, not just any because I do have a daughter, 1:26:38.520 --> 1:26:42.639 and anyone knows like my daughter comes first, yeah, comes first? 1:26:42.680 --> 1:26:46.000 Then you you know, like I come first, then my 1:26:46.080 --> 1:26:47.840 daughter comes first, you know? And where do you all? 1:26:48.360 --> 1:26:50.920 And then if you're okay with that, then great. So 1:26:51.560 --> 1:26:53.800 I've been open to dating people that do not want 1:26:53.880 --> 1:26:55.240 children because. 1:26:54.960 --> 1:26:56.160 You don't want anymore. 1:26:57.160 --> 1:26:58.280 Because it would. 1:27:03.800 --> 1:27:06.280 I'm open to people that have children and people that 1:27:06.400 --> 1:27:12.719 do not have children. I like more mature, more mature 1:27:13.040 --> 1:27:17.800 minds exactly. So I don't see myself like jumping in 1:27:18.240 --> 1:27:19.280 and saying like, oh my god, it. 1:27:19.320 --> 1:27:19.840 Was true love. 1:27:20.080 --> 1:27:22.759 We're going to get married and have no If that happens, great, 1:27:23.160 --> 1:27:26.960 I'm open to marriage, traditional marriage. It can work, you know, 1:27:27.479 --> 1:27:30.960 but for the right person, the person that is going 1:27:31.040 --> 1:27:34.040 to let me be who I am, because I let 1:27:34.120 --> 1:27:36.599 you be who you are, let me be who I am, 1:27:37.120 --> 1:27:38.240 and we're something together. 1:27:38.600 --> 1:27:40.759 But there has to be a certain level of respect. 1:27:41.680 --> 1:27:45.479 And my daughter, like again, my stepdad, my step I 1:27:45.920 --> 1:27:49.680 couldn't tell you he's my dad. That's both of them 1:27:50.120 --> 1:27:54.759 raised me, my biological dad and my stepdad. And that's doable. 1:27:54.880 --> 1:27:58.879 I know something out there or someone out there exists 1:27:59.479 --> 1:28:05.320 that it's going to blend this family idea that I 1:28:05.400 --> 1:28:07.880 have in my head, and if it doesn't happen, I'm great. 1:28:08.600 --> 1:28:13.120 There's there are perks of being single, and there are 1:28:13.200 --> 1:28:16.560 perks in being you know how dope it is to 1:28:16.640 --> 1:28:19.479 be able to be completely independent, that you don't need 1:28:19.720 --> 1:28:22.360 anything from anyone and you can just get to pick 1:28:23.360 --> 1:28:25.080 whatever it is that you want. 1:28:26.200 --> 1:28:28.560 Yeah, there's no feeling, there's no one's feelings or you 1:28:28.560 --> 1:28:30.960 don't have to consider shit. No serious, you don't have 1:28:31.000 --> 1:28:36.439 to consider anything, and that's very important. Yeah, well, thinking 1:28:36.560 --> 1:28:38.640 of that and just knowing who the fuck you are. 1:28:39.040 --> 1:28:40.760 I want to get to part of our show where 1:28:40.800 --> 1:28:42.680 we have our guest share in affirmation. So do you 1:28:42.720 --> 1:28:44.920 have an affirmation that you can share? Think I already 1:28:44.960 --> 1:28:45.240 said it. 1:28:45.439 --> 1:28:49.120 Just say change is overwhelming, changes every lining, but it 1:28:49.320 --> 1:28:50.480 is inevitable. 1:28:51.120 --> 1:28:52.320 If we want a different outcome. 1:28:53.160 --> 1:28:56.639 Change is overwhelming, but it is inevitable if you want 1:28:56.720 --> 1:28:57.799 a different outcome. 1:28:58.680 --> 1:29:01.599 That is a fact, fact, fact fact fact. I think 1:29:01.680 --> 1:29:04.680 Peter is gonna be hard, but once you embrace it, 1:29:05.320 --> 1:29:06.320 that's it. I'll lock it. 1:29:06.479 --> 1:29:07.160 Shift happen. 1:29:07.320 --> 1:29:10.479 You can't be scared. You can't be scared. You know 1:29:10.640 --> 1:29:12.400 yourself what you need to do to get to the 1:29:12.439 --> 1:29:12.920 other side. 1:29:13.000 --> 1:29:14.519 Just get it done. Break it down. 1:29:15.920 --> 1:29:19.360 I think like it's like you can't you do you 1:29:20.680 --> 1:29:23.160 if change is easy? I mean you always hear this, change. 1:29:22.960 --> 1:29:25.519 These easy, everyone would be doing it. Yeah, but it's 1:29:25.560 --> 1:29:28.000 a fact. It's really just that simple. It's really you're 1:29:28.000 --> 1:29:28.799 gonna live a misery. 1:29:28.880 --> 1:29:30.720 And even if you are scared, you have to kind 1:29:30.760 --> 1:29:32.879 of say fuck the fear and just do it anyway, 1:29:33.800 --> 1:29:37.960 because what would be worse is you waking up five 1:29:38.080 --> 1:29:40.080 ten years from now and you're still in the same 1:29:40.200 --> 1:29:44.400 fucking loop. And now you're like even doubting yourself even more. 1:29:44.479 --> 1:29:46.920 The fear is even built even more because you've got 1:29:47.439 --> 1:29:49.520 strayed so far away from that person. 1:29:49.520 --> 1:29:51.600 And now this is like a big mountain and you're like, 1:29:51.960 --> 1:29:54.439 wait a second, how am I even going to climb this? 1:29:55.360 --> 1:29:57.840 But what I say is usually I don't know if 1:29:57.840 --> 1:30:00.280 it happens to you guys that when you have lot 1:30:00.520 --> 1:30:02.680 and you're like, wait a second, how am I going 1:30:02.720 --> 1:30:03.479 to accomplish this? 1:30:04.320 --> 1:30:05.080 Break it down. 1:30:05.800 --> 1:30:08.519 Life is not a race, it's a marathon. So in 1:30:08.600 --> 1:30:11.040 your head you have to do this yesterday, and you're. 1:30:10.920 --> 1:30:12.559 Thinking like, well, I want to start this and it's 1:30:12.600 --> 1:30:13.479 going to take me this This is. 1:30:13.800 --> 1:30:18.000 Why don't you start by starting Yeah, right, and you're 1:30:18.080 --> 1:30:22.680 breaking it down right, step by step. Once you accomplish 1:30:22.720 --> 1:30:27.160 one thing, it's less overwhelming, less scary because you're you 1:30:27.200 --> 1:30:31.320 already faced your fears like you are afraid because you 1:30:31.400 --> 1:30:32.559 don't know the outcome. 1:30:32.800 --> 1:30:33.280 So stop. 1:30:33.720 --> 1:30:37.639 Obviously, you want to make decisions that are obviously you're 1:30:37.680 --> 1:30:39.439 not going to say, well, I'm going to put all 1:30:39.479 --> 1:30:41.880 my eggs in this basket and just throw myself out 1:30:41.920 --> 1:30:46.960 of a glyph. No, you're making safe decisions. You know 1:30:47.360 --> 1:30:50.160 what you're capable of, So you're going to take risks 1:30:50.360 --> 1:30:54.160 based on what you believe you're capable of, which is 1:30:54.400 --> 1:30:57.000 it's very important what you tell yourself every single day. 1:30:57.520 --> 1:31:00.880 I never wanted to make myself a victim, he said, 1:31:00.920 --> 1:31:03.040 I'm not going to go and speak about any like. 1:31:03.160 --> 1:31:04.320 No, I am not a victim. 1:31:04.479 --> 1:31:06.880 If I say, well, and this happened to me and 1:31:07.120 --> 1:31:09.600 this person, and that, you're gonna start believing that the 1:31:09.640 --> 1:31:14.040 body keeps a score. What you tell your thoughts physiologically 1:31:14.120 --> 1:31:14.800 change your body. 1:31:15.479 --> 1:31:17.439 So raise it. 1:31:19.120 --> 1:31:19.840 Oh you got to. 1:31:22.080 --> 1:31:24.679 Is it Tarot time? I love, I think it's Tarot time. 1:31:26.120 --> 1:31:28.400 We pulled Massy pulled the wheel of fortune. 1:31:28.479 --> 1:31:29.080 Which we haven't. 1:31:29.120 --> 1:31:31.479 I don't know if you've pulled this recently or this 1:31:31.680 --> 1:31:37.320 year and the will. The will of fortune means good luck, karma, 1:31:37.760 --> 1:31:44.439 life cycles, destiny, and a turning point. The will of 1:31:44.479 --> 1:31:46.880 fortune reminds you that the wheel is always turning and 1:31:47.000 --> 1:31:51.320 life is in a state of constant change. If you're 1:31:51.320 --> 1:31:53.599 going through a difficult time, rest assured that it will 1:31:53.640 --> 1:31:56.920 get better from here. Good luck and good fortune will 1:31:56.960 --> 1:32:00.720 make their return in time. Similarly, if they are going well, 1:32:00.960 --> 1:32:03.840 know this too. Know this too will change and life 1:32:03.920 --> 1:32:06.800 my return to normal soon. This cycle shows why it 1:32:06.880 --> 1:32:09.160 is so important to cherish the blissful moments in your 1:32:09.200 --> 1:32:11.200 life and make the most of them while they are 1:32:11.320 --> 1:32:13.760 within reach, because in a flash they could be gone. 1:32:14.920 --> 1:32:16.720 The will of fortune is also known as the will 1:32:16.760 --> 1:32:20.320 of karma and reminds you that what goes around comes around. 1:32:20.520 --> 1:32:23.000 Be a kind and loving person to others and they'll 1:32:23.040 --> 1:32:25.720 be kind and loving to you. Be nasty and mean, 1:32:25.920 --> 1:32:28.280 and you will get nasty and mean, turning back your way. 1:32:28.920 --> 1:32:31.479 So if you want happiness and abundance, make sure you're 1:32:31.479 --> 1:32:34.840 sending out the positive juju and kind What you send 1:32:34.880 --> 1:32:37.360 out in the universe will come back your way. The 1:32:37.439 --> 1:32:39.800 Will of Fortune card asks you to be optimistic and 1:32:39.920 --> 1:32:42.120 have faith that the universe will take care of your 1:32:42.160 --> 1:32:46.800 situation in the best way possible. Meditation and visualization can 1:32:46.880 --> 1:32:50.439 reinforce your intention to bring increased abundance, good fortune, and 1:32:50.560 --> 1:32:53.360 prosperity to you. Your life is about to turn in 1:32:53.479 --> 1:32:55.960 more positive directions if you are willing to grow and 1:32:56.120 --> 1:32:59.920 expand keep your mind open to all kinds of synchronicities 1:33:00.439 --> 1:33:03.439 and signs from the universe. The magic of fate and 1:33:03.560 --> 1:33:08.240 destiny is behind you and miracles are happening. M you 1:33:08.280 --> 1:33:09.680 know what, I think we need to start pulling the 1:33:09.720 --> 1:33:11.400 card on camera because people are gonna think that we 1:33:11.520 --> 1:33:13.240 just like pull this card to just make the shit up. 1:33:13.320 --> 1:33:15.680 I was thinking that too, because it always goes with 1:33:15.800 --> 1:33:19.679 the episode, always utterly every time, every time. 1:33:19.880 --> 1:33:22.360 You know, I believe in in like energy and I 1:33:22.520 --> 1:33:27.120 believe I believe like we're nothing is you said it? 1:33:27.240 --> 1:33:29.560 Like look at the little things that the universe is 1:33:29.640 --> 1:33:31.640 throwing at you all the time, like. 1:33:34.320 --> 1:33:37.000 Literally, like no matter what you believe, no matter what 1:33:37.160 --> 1:33:40.439 religion or non religion or whatever higher power, or you 1:33:40.479 --> 1:33:43.040 don't believe in it at all, Like when you it's 1:33:43.120 --> 1:33:47.600 again like when you start choosing yourself, the synchronicities and 1:33:47.840 --> 1:33:50.800 like the signs will be so clear, and like that's 1:33:50.800 --> 1:33:53.240 happened a lot in our relationship, Like when we when 1:33:53.320 --> 1:33:56.160 we chose this thing that we chose that we didn't 1:33:56.160 --> 1:33:58.639 know we were choosing, it was just like very clear 1:33:58.840 --> 1:34:00.800 that even if it was scary, we should keep going, 1:34:01.120 --> 1:34:03.840 even if people were like that's crazy, we should keep going. 1:34:04.360 --> 1:34:08.680 And I think people underestimate the signs, you know. And 1:34:08.760 --> 1:34:11.400 sometimes it's a stranger like telling you something on the street. 1:34:12.000 --> 1:34:14.840 Sometimes you're watching TV and it like just affirms something 1:34:14.880 --> 1:34:16.920 you just told your best friend or you thought you 1:34:17.000 --> 1:34:18.920 had a thought, and then someone says like, yo, I 1:34:19.040 --> 1:34:21.960 was thinking about this and it's in alignment. But usually 1:34:22.240 --> 1:34:27.280 like spirit will send you signs and opportunities and you'll 1:34:27.280 --> 1:34:31.479 be like, oh shit, thanks, you know, like and it's 1:34:31.560 --> 1:34:33.320 so true. And even if you're in a position right 1:34:33.360 --> 1:34:36.920 now where you're struggling to choose yourself or struggling to 1:34:37.000 --> 1:34:39.600 choose your happiness, like and you're listening to this, this 1:34:39.760 --> 1:34:42.680 is no coincidence, you know, or you're watching this, like 1:34:42.800 --> 1:34:44.439 if you're hearing this message at a time in your 1:34:44.479 --> 1:34:47.479 life where you actually absolutely needed this message. It's not 1:34:47.600 --> 1:34:50.160 by coincidence that you came and chose this episode and 1:34:50.280 --> 1:34:53.519 heard this story and this testament. And you know, don't 1:34:53.640 --> 1:34:57.560 underestimate the signs that God or Spirit gives to you, 1:34:57.720 --> 1:35:01.240 because a lot of times it's just the sway in 1:35:01.320 --> 1:35:03.920 which sometimes you need a little kick in the ass 1:35:04.600 --> 1:35:07.120 and you know, a little like, you know, a little 1:35:07.520 --> 1:35:10.360 affirmation that it's this is the direction you're supposed to 1:35:10.400 --> 1:35:12.559 go in, and this is how you're supposed to choose yourself. 1:35:12.640 --> 1:35:16.439 And I'm a sign taking bitch. I'm like, oh my god, 1:35:16.520 --> 1:35:18.320 did you hear that blape? Something broke? 1:35:18.640 --> 1:35:19.160 It's true. 1:35:19.439 --> 1:35:22.040 Whatever we're talking about is it resonates, you know, like, oh, 1:35:22.080 --> 1:35:24.519 it's eleven eleven, Like at this very moment, we're talking 1:35:24.520 --> 1:35:28.320 about this very important thing or this idea or you know, 1:35:28.439 --> 1:35:30.240 this this whatever the fuck it is. 1:35:31.160 --> 1:35:33.640 You know, you see an animal emerge, what's a grasshopper? 1:35:33.720 --> 1:35:33.760 Me? 1:35:34.720 --> 1:35:35.120 This is me? 1:35:35.320 --> 1:35:38.320 You know. But and some people think that's crazy, and 1:35:38.960 --> 1:35:39.880 for some people it is. 1:35:40.040 --> 1:35:43.519 But you'd be surprised that when you ask Spirit give 1:35:43.560 --> 1:35:47.080 me a sign, that shit will show up if you're 1:35:47.080 --> 1:35:49.320 paying attention, and even if you're in a relationship that 1:35:49.360 --> 1:35:52.479 feels like maybe it's not where you're supposed to be. Literally, 1:35:52.600 --> 1:35:55.720 that prayer is like, God, if this is not for me, 1:35:56.720 --> 1:36:00.200 make it so bad that I can't deny it. Show me, 1:36:01.000 --> 1:36:04.720 you know, like when you say that prayer, literally, within 1:36:04.840 --> 1:36:06.160 days you will be shown. 1:36:06.240 --> 1:36:07.360 And I'm not fucking kidding. 1:36:07.760 --> 1:36:09.960 It's like this the most powerful prayer, Like if this 1:36:10.080 --> 1:36:12.560 no longer serves me, God, show me that it no 1:36:12.640 --> 1:36:14.800 longer serves me in a way that I can't deny it. 1:36:14.960 --> 1:36:16.960 That last part is really the part you need in 1:36:17.040 --> 1:36:20.120 a way that I can't deny it, because bitches will 1:36:20.320 --> 1:36:24.240 be in denial for some dick and some love and 1:36:24.360 --> 1:36:26.280 some fairy tale that may not be your fairy tale, 1:36:26.320 --> 1:36:28.479 and you might be actually missing out on the fairy 1:36:28.520 --> 1:36:31.559 tale that you actually deserve because you're so busy trying 1:36:31.600 --> 1:36:33.760 to make some shit work that doesn't. So, you know, 1:36:34.000 --> 1:36:36.040 people always ask how do you honor your intuition? How 1:36:36.080 --> 1:36:38.080 do you honor yourself? And like, sometimes it just takes 1:36:38.120 --> 1:36:41.240 a little prayer because if you're feeling indifferent, you know, 1:36:41.400 --> 1:36:44.320 there's already a plant seated that says, maybe this ain't it. 1:36:44.880 --> 1:36:47.040 So if you just need that one little extra. 1:36:48.760 --> 1:36:49.800 That will do it, and. 1:36:49.800 --> 1:36:54.360 There's a level of consciousness also that you're acquiring by saying, Okay, 1:36:54.479 --> 1:36:57.280 let's say if I'm unhappy and I want to be 1:36:57.320 --> 1:37:00.920 in an environment where I feel supported, surrounding yourself with 1:37:01.000 --> 1:37:04.599 the energy that is going to be supportive. So you're 1:37:04.760 --> 1:37:08.040 starting you're going to start to walk in those thoughts. 1:37:08.680 --> 1:37:10.600 You're not gonna steer towards the energy that makes you 1:37:10.680 --> 1:37:11.880 feel X, Y and Z, You're. 1:37:11.800 --> 1:37:12.960 Going to go the other way. 1:37:13.240 --> 1:37:17.120 And sometimes that energy, which can be confusing for people. 1:37:17.280 --> 1:37:20.320 Sometimes the energy, the energy of not being supported is 1:37:20.360 --> 1:37:22.640 from people you've known the longest. Yeah, and you have 1:37:22.800 --> 1:37:25.519 to start to recognize even that, like, dam you're my 1:37:25.600 --> 1:37:27.960 best friend I've known for my whole life. But this 1:37:28.080 --> 1:37:30.679 doesn't really feel supportive. This doesn't feel good to me anymore. 1:37:30.880 --> 1:37:33.720 You don't really love and accept me for all that 1:37:33.840 --> 1:37:35.880 I am. It's difficult for you to do that. But 1:37:36.000 --> 1:37:38.840 maybe this person I just met this week is all 1:37:39.000 --> 1:37:41.040 for it, you know, and like you will start to 1:37:41.120 --> 1:37:43.240 feel when you start to be like read the energy 1:37:43.600 --> 1:37:45.519 and how people like when you leave people, how you 1:37:45.640 --> 1:37:49.160 actually feel, if you feel energized, if you feel like motivated, 1:37:49.320 --> 1:37:52.080 or if you feel like dampleted, depleted or down about 1:37:52.080 --> 1:37:54.280 yourself or questioning who you are or what you're doing. 1:37:54.560 --> 1:37:56.840 That's enough for you to know that does that energy 1:37:56.880 --> 1:37:58.479 doesn't resonate period. 1:37:58.960 --> 1:38:01.479 And sometimes it's motherfuckers, you know, in your whole life. 1:38:01.520 --> 1:38:04.880 Sometimes it's family, sometimes it's your lover. But start paying 1:38:04.880 --> 1:38:07.240 attention to how you feel, you know, when you leave 1:38:07.400 --> 1:38:11.439 you a conversation or the presence of someone and taking 1:38:11.520 --> 1:38:14.960 note and just gravitating towards what makes you feel good. 1:38:15.000 --> 1:38:18.600 And sometimes it's just you until you find that friend. 1:38:19.040 --> 1:38:21.200 Or sometimes you don't even know that you're the problem, 1:38:21.880 --> 1:38:25.000 and you have to analyze yourself. Sometimes you can be 1:38:25.200 --> 1:38:27.840 in your own thoughts and have this constructing your mind 1:38:27.880 --> 1:38:31.040 that no, this is right, and you may be the 1:38:31.160 --> 1:38:35.320 one who's that wrong. You may be wrong no, like 1:38:35.520 --> 1:38:38.920 and there's that's the saddest thing to go through. Like 1:38:39.040 --> 1:38:41.160 the truth is gonna set you free, but it's gonna 1:38:41.200 --> 1:38:43.400 either make you really sad or piss you off to 1:38:43.479 --> 1:38:43.840 begin with. 1:38:43.960 --> 1:38:46.160 You like, Deah, maybe I'm judging myself because I'm judging 1:38:46.160 --> 1:38:48.599 everybody else, and that's why I can't get from point 1:38:48.680 --> 1:38:50.880 A to point B. And you know, and sometimes it 1:38:51.080 --> 1:38:54.439 requires that you reflect and really examine, like, am I 1:38:54.520 --> 1:38:57.360 the fucking problem? I'm the toxic person? Am I holding 1:38:57.400 --> 1:38:59.960 myself back with these you know, limiting beliefs about myself? 1:39:00.240 --> 1:39:03.360 Am I beating myself up all the time. It's like 1:39:03.479 --> 1:39:05.920 it really requires for you to like be silent and 1:39:06.000 --> 1:39:08.960 go within and kind of reflect on your thoughts and 1:39:09.360 --> 1:39:11.760 the things that you tell yourself. And once you start 1:39:11.800 --> 1:39:15.320 to do that, it kind of becomes your voice gets 1:39:15.360 --> 1:39:17.200 louder and you start to realize, like why are you 1:39:17.320 --> 1:39:19.280 talking about that yourself that way? Why are these the 1:39:19.320 --> 1:39:21.200 negative thoughts that you're happening, And you kind of have 1:39:21.280 --> 1:39:23.400 to beat yourself back up, like, bitch, I'm the shit 1:39:24.080 --> 1:39:26.280 even if you're talking to yourself, Yeah, you know, and 1:39:26.439 --> 1:39:29.960 like you're powerful and you're worthy and you're you're worth it, 1:39:30.120 --> 1:39:34.080 and like you got to really, really really practice conditioning 1:39:34.160 --> 1:39:36.000 yourself to love yourself and. 1:39:36.120 --> 1:39:41.400 Living authentically yourself, knowing that you are a human that 1:39:41.560 --> 1:39:44.920 is perfectly imperfect. You're going to make mistakes, You're going 1:39:45.000 --> 1:39:48.000 to hurt people, but you can change that. Right. If 1:39:48.040 --> 1:39:50.840 you hurt someone, you can change that. Right. 1:39:51.360 --> 1:39:54.360 If someone hurts you, you can learn from that and 1:39:54.439 --> 1:39:58.439 you can change that other person too. By how you 1:39:58.600 --> 1:40:02.280 come across to me. I know I'm not a perfect human. 1:40:03.080 --> 1:40:05.320 Like no one it's going to ever look at me. 1:40:05.840 --> 1:40:08.639 It may look like what I do, Oh, she's perfect 1:40:08.920 --> 1:40:10.400 what she does. But at the end of the day, 1:40:11.080 --> 1:40:15.519 I've hurt people, I've disappointed people, I've disappointed myself. 1:40:16.479 --> 1:40:17.120 I'm a human. 1:40:17.640 --> 1:40:20.360 I'm doing things for the first time, and whether if 1:40:20.360 --> 1:40:23.240 I'm doing it, if I'm failing, I'm not going to 1:40:23.280 --> 1:40:24.000 beat myself up. 1:40:24.400 --> 1:40:26.679 I know that I am going to continue to try 1:40:27.320 --> 1:40:28.479 because it's for the first time. 1:40:28.960 --> 1:40:30.000 Just like you would do your daughter. 1:40:30.200 --> 1:40:32.040 You know, you don't be up when they fail or 1:40:32.080 --> 1:40:35.320 when they don't get first place or whatever. You're constantly 1:40:35.400 --> 1:40:38.519 gently teaching them to be better with themselves. And sometimes 1:40:38.720 --> 1:40:41.560 the same way you would love on your child, or 1:40:41.600 --> 1:40:43.880 your niece or your nephew, you have to apply that 1:40:44.000 --> 1:40:47.439 same level of gentleness and care to yourself. It's like, 1:40:47.479 --> 1:40:49.519 it's okay, girl, Like we fuck up. It's okay, you 1:40:49.600 --> 1:40:51.599 made that mistake. It's okay you did this thing. Now 1:40:51.640 --> 1:40:52.880 we're learning from it and what's next. 1:40:53.120 --> 1:40:53.240 Now. 1:40:53.280 --> 1:40:57.280 If it's a behavior that continues without any learning, that's 1:40:57.360 --> 1:41:01.439 a different, you know path. But I believe you know 1:41:01.640 --> 1:41:06.040 we should give people the same benefit of the doubt 1:41:06.360 --> 1:41:09.519 that we would like. I always say I like to 1:41:09.600 --> 1:41:12.679 treat others the way that I would like to treat myself. 1:41:13.439 --> 1:41:14.200 And even though I. 1:41:14.240 --> 1:41:20.240 Sometimes fail, right, because I'm human, I am often checking myself, okay, 1:41:20.479 --> 1:41:21.040 checking myself? 1:41:21.080 --> 1:41:22.479 How am I doing? As a mom? That's why I 1:41:22.520 --> 1:41:25.679 ask India, how do you think I'm doing on that video? 1:41:26.040 --> 1:41:27.680 What do you think I'm doing? Am I doing a 1:41:27.720 --> 1:41:29.120 good job? Am I doing? Hey? 1:41:29.320 --> 1:41:31.880 Or to my mom like hey, how do you think 1:41:31.880 --> 1:41:34.400 I'm doing as a friend or as a daughter? 1:41:34.840 --> 1:41:38.600 Right? The biggest the biggest. 1:41:38.360 --> 1:41:41.760 Awakenings for me have been coming from family that has 1:41:41.840 --> 1:41:45.719 taught me like, hey, you something is wrong. 1:41:46.280 --> 1:41:48.680 What's going on? And I think you're doing X y 1:41:48.840 --> 1:41:50.639 Z and that's not cool? 1:41:51.960 --> 1:41:54.960 And I've had to check myself because at the end 1:41:55.000 --> 1:41:59.360 of the day, I have to be kind more kind sometimes, 1:41:59.400 --> 1:42:04.760 you know. I remember a year after just going through 1:42:04.880 --> 1:42:08.920 divorce and whatnot, I was mad. I would not let 1:42:09.000 --> 1:42:11.760 anyone in. And it wasn't up until someone that I 1:42:11.920 --> 1:42:18.200 work with that where guys were commenting on the video 1:42:18.320 --> 1:42:20.400 that I was working out with. That person told me. 1:42:21.120 --> 1:42:25.160 You know, how many guys come up to me Mossie, like, 1:42:25.240 --> 1:42:27.200 they want to take you out. They want to Oh 1:42:27.280 --> 1:42:29.559 my god, it's like left and right when you leave. 1:42:30.120 --> 1:42:34.080 It's just but they would never because you look unapproachable. 1:42:35.360 --> 1:42:36.680 And mind you, I had to tell him, but I 1:42:36.840 --> 1:42:40.640 want to be unapproachable at that time. And I you know, 1:42:40.880 --> 1:42:43.799 now my energy is more, it's lighter, it's more receptive. 1:42:44.439 --> 1:42:47.280 Now things just change because I've processed. 1:42:46.840 --> 1:42:47.439 All those things. 1:42:47.680 --> 1:42:48.960 You're aware, You're like, I don't. 1:42:49.000 --> 1:42:52.840 I couldn't get into any relationship without it not being healthy, right. 1:42:53.280 --> 1:42:56.360 It was going to come with some level of distrust 1:42:56.760 --> 1:42:59.080 or some level part of me that was not going 1:42:59.120 --> 1:43:03.160 to let that relationship be healed. Therefore, if you're going 1:43:03.240 --> 1:43:07.400 through a breakup, allow yourself the time to heal. That way, 1:43:07.520 --> 1:43:10.600 the next relationship that you're in, you're not bouncing and 1:43:10.720 --> 1:43:14.480 bringing in all of those traits. 1:43:14.200 --> 1:43:16.000 That you have to heal or all the things that 1:43:16.080 --> 1:43:16.679 you have to heal. 1:43:16.920 --> 1:43:19.080 And that's what I find that people just date and 1:43:19.120 --> 1:43:22.320 continue to date around and they're all bringing each other's 1:43:22.360 --> 1:43:26.240 dramas and not out traumas and not really processing. So 1:43:27.000 --> 1:43:30.479 you can tell when someone is completely or I need 1:43:30.680 --> 1:43:34.200 at least not at one hundred percent healed. But when 1:43:34.200 --> 1:43:38.599 they're ready, it's a different kind of energy, right, Because 1:43:38.600 --> 1:43:41.240 what I want now is just I want no drama. 1:43:42.040 --> 1:43:50.400 I just want peace, quiet happiness. 1:43:51.000 --> 1:43:53.040 Not that it's always going to be looking that way 1:43:53.600 --> 1:43:57.760 at every point, but I know exactly what I want, Like, 1:43:57.840 --> 1:43:58.639 I want no drama. 1:43:58.880 --> 1:44:00.679 And you want to be able to exist just says 1:44:00.720 --> 1:44:02.800 you fucking are because this is who you are and 1:44:02.960 --> 1:44:05.040 to be loved for who you are, as we all do. 1:44:05.120 --> 1:44:06.360 And I think that's the thing, is like we're so 1:44:06.439 --> 1:44:09.200 busy trying to put ourselves in a box of acceptance 1:44:09.280 --> 1:44:11.800 and the truth the true acceptance comes when you're not 1:44:11.920 --> 1:44:14.719 trying to box yourself in and you're just existing boldly 1:44:15.040 --> 1:44:17.240 because those people will come and be like I like that, 1:44:17.439 --> 1:44:20.759 I want that. But when you start to like I conformed, 1:44:20.840 --> 1:44:22.439 I do this and I do this to be likable, 1:44:22.600 --> 1:44:24.719 then you get all these people that are not really 1:44:24.840 --> 1:44:30.680 liking you for you. Speaking of people, do you have 1:44:30.680 --> 1:44:31.280 any horries? 1:44:32.640 --> 1:44:33.560 What's a hor like? 1:44:33.640 --> 1:44:45.280 I'm very like a hotel Oho stories. I have one 1:44:45.320 --> 1:44:45.960 too from Miami. 1:44:46.000 --> 1:44:48.120 I just remember, Oh, okay, I was gonna share one 1:44:48.160 --> 1:44:48.920 from our audience. 1:44:48.960 --> 1:44:49.920 Okay, you could share that one. 1:44:50.000 --> 1:44:51.719 No, if you want to go and do it. Go ahead, 1:44:51.960 --> 1:44:55.280 I can share too, Okay. So I went to Miami. 1:44:56.120 --> 1:44:59.280 This is not that long, so don't worry. And you know, 1:45:00.040 --> 1:45:01.600 you know there's a mile High club where you have 1:45:01.680 --> 1:45:03.200 sex and an airplane which I don't even know how 1:45:03.240 --> 1:45:05.400 anyone has sex, and that little ass air Yeah, mile 1:45:05.520 --> 1:45:08.839 high club, that little ass bathroom. It doesn't seem sanitary, 1:45:08.960 --> 1:45:11.880 but maybe if you're driving riding private. But I haven't 1:45:11.920 --> 1:45:15.040 gotten there yet. But anyway, we went on a yeat 1:45:15.360 --> 1:45:18.760 this weekend and I was like, oh, yeah, we need to. 1:45:18.920 --> 1:45:20.760 I don't know what it's called for the boat, but 1:45:20.840 --> 1:45:23.519 we're going to join that club under the underwater. No 1:45:23.640 --> 1:45:25.880 I've I named it the Rock the Boat Club. 1:45:26.280 --> 1:45:27.240 Oh okay like that. 1:45:29.040 --> 1:45:31.720 So actually our friend also joined the Rock the Boat Club. 1:45:31.760 --> 1:45:34.880 We made a truce and she was like, you know 1:45:34.920 --> 1:45:37.360 they under the cabin at the yacht there's little rooms. 1:45:37.800 --> 1:45:40.679 They're a little but they cute, you know, little round 1:45:40.760 --> 1:45:42.640 bed and I was like, we all got in there 1:45:42.680 --> 1:45:45.120 and there was four of us there and I was like, listen, 1:45:45.360 --> 1:45:46.759 do you want to use the room at two thirty? 1:45:46.800 --> 1:45:47.880 We're going to come in at three. 1:45:49.320 --> 1:45:52.280 And she missed her appointment, but I did not, and 1:45:52.520 --> 1:45:55.320 so we went in there and we met in Orlando 1:45:55.439 --> 1:45:57.280 made a very good suggestion, we need to we need 1:45:57.360 --> 1:46:00.240 to you know, usually the boat like dock somewhere, like, no, 1:46:00.320 --> 1:46:01.800 we need to go on there when it's moving, and 1:46:01.880 --> 1:46:02.679 I was like yeah. 1:46:03.200 --> 1:46:05.040 So we went down to the bottom when. 1:46:04.920 --> 1:46:07.880 The boat started moving, and there was like a little 1:46:07.960 --> 1:46:12.120 mirror on the bed the headboard, and like there's a 1:46:12.120 --> 1:46:14.920 little small window, but there's just waves. And then you 1:46:14.960 --> 1:46:16.920 start like rocking and then he's like giving me some 1:46:17.040 --> 1:46:20.920 head and I was like, oh, yeah, it's like adding 1:46:20.920 --> 1:46:23.840 it was like a waterbed but in real life. And 1:46:23.840 --> 1:46:25.320 then we were having sex. And then I could see 1:46:25.640 --> 1:46:27.519 see myself in the mirror and I was like looking 1:46:27.560 --> 1:46:29.280 at because there's also a window at the top, I 1:46:29.280 --> 1:46:31.000 could see the sky and I was looking at the 1:46:31.040 --> 1:46:32.800 other window and I could see the water waves, and 1:46:32.880 --> 1:46:34.920 I was like, oh, I'm a fucking mermaid. 1:46:38.040 --> 1:46:39.600 It was really hot. And I was like, probably no 1:46:39.640 --> 1:46:41.760 one can even hear us, because yeah, I didn't hear shit. 1:46:41.960 --> 1:46:42.639 I heard nothing. 1:46:43.200 --> 1:46:45.320 Anyway, if you ever on a yacht with a small 1:46:45.400 --> 1:46:48.639 room on the bottom and it's moving, I highly recommend 1:46:48.840 --> 1:46:51.439 joining the Rock the Boat Club with me in Orlando 1:46:51.600 --> 1:46:52.439 because we did it and. 1:46:52.479 --> 1:46:55.320 It was great. Wow, Wow, this is this is a 1:46:55.400 --> 1:46:58.639 luxury hotel. This is a luxury hotel on the yacht. 1:46:58.880 --> 1:47:02.160 Go down to the bottom deck. It was very nice. 1:47:02.520 --> 1:47:04.120 I have another horri but I think I want to 1:47:04.120 --> 1:47:07.080 save it for Patreon because it's pretty fucking juicy, is it? Okay, 1:47:07.120 --> 1:47:12.880 it's a little nasty. It involves poop. Oh god, now you. 1:47:12.960 --> 1:47:15.400 Have to say it now, I'm all in. I'm interested. 1:47:15.439 --> 1:47:16.639 It loves poop in ecstasy. 1:47:17.040 --> 1:47:21.800 Poop and ecstasy. Okay, okay, So if you want to 1:47:21.840 --> 1:47:24.200 hear this horry, make sure we're not gonna You're not 1:47:24.240 --> 1:47:26.400 gonna hear right now. You have to actually go join Patreon. 1:47:26.680 --> 1:47:28.760 Click the link in this episode description. If to hear 1:47:29.160 --> 1:47:32.959 this week's hory about poop in ecstasy, I'm joining patreon 1:47:33.000 --> 1:47:35.760 dot com backslash Good Mom's Bad Choices. Okay, here we go. 1:47:36.400 --> 1:47:39.200 I just love the openness and the transparency we have here. 1:47:39.240 --> 1:47:40.760 And I just want to say for the record that 1:47:41.840 --> 1:47:44.880 it's true ho shit brings the hose together, and sometimes 1:47:44.920 --> 1:47:47.519 that hoe is your husband, and you know that's how 1:47:47.560 --> 1:47:50.560 you find like who's acceptance, who has acceptance. 1:47:50.120 --> 1:47:50.880 Over the host shit? 1:47:50.960 --> 1:47:54.200 And I highly recommend too hose finding each other, because 1:47:54.240 --> 1:47:56.920 if you find someone who's square, then you're gonna be 1:47:57.040 --> 1:47:59.880 just lusting after hos shit your whole life. 1:48:00.600 --> 1:48:02.200 Wait, why is the last part? Okay? 1:48:02.320 --> 1:48:02.439 Eric? 1:48:02.520 --> 1:48:03.880 I have a burning question. Need to ask. 1:48:04.320 --> 1:48:06.320 Did your friend ever get an email back from the 1:48:06.400 --> 1:48:08.559 wife of the guy who catfished you and lied about 1:48:08.600 --> 1:48:11.920 his son living in London? I've been listening trying to 1:48:11.920 --> 1:48:14.320 find an update. What's the wife's Instagram handle? Can I 1:48:14.400 --> 1:48:16.320 send her your podcast episode where you put them on 1:48:16.400 --> 1:48:19.200 blast Lord? I'm sure somebody already did, and we don't know. 1:48:19.360 --> 1:48:21.360 We never I think we bought the episode is called 1:48:21.400 --> 1:48:23.760 him dating a married man, but we never we never heard. 1:48:24.920 --> 1:48:26.320 Oh they had another baby? 1:48:26.400 --> 1:48:26.640 They did. 1:48:26.680 --> 1:48:28.120 They had another baby. She was pregnant. 1:48:28.200 --> 1:48:28.719 That's what happened. 1:48:28.800 --> 1:48:31.360 When we looked last a couple of years ago, she 1:48:31.720 --> 1:48:35.120 was having another baby. Yeah, they I don't know if 1:48:35.160 --> 1:48:39.720 that was a good good choice, but yeah, wow, that 1:48:39.840 --> 1:48:40.920 was a good one. And if you want to know 1:48:40.960 --> 1:48:44.640 what webrate these your hories, there are ten we keep 1:48:44.720 --> 1:48:48.080 reading them. You're doing a good job, girl, girl wow, 1:48:48.920 --> 1:48:51.160 and we barely get like level ten good ones, and 1:48:51.240 --> 1:48:52.479 you seem to keep bringing the. 1:48:52.520 --> 1:48:55.519 Heat, and if you have any horries, please make sure 1:48:55.640 --> 1:49:02.480 to either email them to where pod No Parental Advisory 1:49:02.640 --> 1:49:05.840 GMBC at gmail dot com, or you can actually leave 1:49:05.920 --> 1:49:08.519 us a voice message. You can leave us a voicemail 1:49:08.600 --> 1:49:11.439 and confess and will anonymously play your horri on the 1:49:11.520 --> 1:49:14.080 show or shared a Patreon. The number is eight one 1:49:14.880 --> 1:49:19.559 three twelve eighty seven. Yep, that's it, but we'll leave 1:49:19.600 --> 1:49:22.320 all that in the episode description. Massy, thank you so 1:49:22.400 --> 1:49:23.840 much for joining us. I hope we didn't scary you 1:49:23.880 --> 1:49:24.680 with that last little bit. 1:49:25.400 --> 1:49:28.240 No, I mean, I just can't tell you mine. When 1:49:28.280 --> 1:49:30.280 we turn off their brand. 1:49:31.120 --> 1:49:33.000 We turn off this Mike, I'm getting all the juice. 1:49:33.960 --> 1:49:34.200 You know what. 1:49:34.600 --> 1:49:35.400 I thought you were going to say. 1:49:35.479 --> 1:49:37.560 They're going to say, you know, I'm all this and that, 1:49:37.760 --> 1:49:39.519 but I'm a freak, and I was like, I can 1:49:39.640 --> 1:49:42.960 see that. Something tells me MASSI when like the door 1:49:43.080 --> 1:49:43.439 is closed. 1:49:43.479 --> 1:49:45.640 Listen, there's fire in this chart for a reason. It's 1:49:45.640 --> 1:49:46.519 Scorpio and Venus. 1:49:46.600 --> 1:49:50.000 Bitch, please Gemini to those little freaks. I'm half Gemini. 1:49:51.720 --> 1:49:53.160 Tell our audience where they can find you. 1:49:54.160 --> 1:49:56.040 I am everywhere. I'm like air no. 1:49:57.920 --> 1:50:01.479 Global global list like just like that everywhere be honest, 1:50:02.360 --> 1:50:08.280 but on Instagram MASSI m A as y A r 1:50:08.439 --> 1:50:13.320 I A s in mos vida that io and we'll 1:50:13.360 --> 1:50:13.880 link everything. 1:50:13.920 --> 1:50:16.240 That's episode description. Thank you so much for coming on 1:50:16.720 --> 1:50:17.840 GOTT and chatting with us. 1:50:18.280 --> 1:50:20.639 You guys, make sure you go and rate and review 1:50:20.720 --> 1:50:23.240 this episode on Apple Podcast if you haven't, if you've 1:50:23.240 --> 1:50:25.000 been listening for years and you haven't left a review, 1:50:25.240 --> 1:50:27.920 please go do that. Also, if you're listening or I'm 1:50:28.000 --> 1:50:31.400 sorry watching on YouTube, hit that subscribe button subscribe to 1:50:31.439 --> 1:50:32.360 our YouTube channel. 1:50:32.840 --> 1:50:35.160 We have another retreat coming up in Costa Rica for 1:50:35.240 --> 1:50:39.160 New Year's Eve. It's December twenty eighth to January second, 1:50:39.680 --> 1:50:41.840 and we're going for New Year's Eve, bitches, So pack 1:50:41.920 --> 1:50:45.439 your bags, get a babysitter, come heal, come have fun, 1:50:46.160 --> 1:50:48.679 Come frolic topless, come meet good food. 1:50:48.960 --> 1:50:51.479 Come be in the Caribbean and dance on the beach 1:50:51.560 --> 1:50:52.320 on New Year's Eve. 1:50:53.160 --> 1:50:56.760 And you know, meet your tribe because it's strong out 1:50:56.800 --> 1:51:00.599 here and we really have cultivated a really amazing group 1:51:00.680 --> 1:51:06.080 of women who have just good stories and just open 1:51:06.200 --> 1:51:09.400 hearts and are looking also for friendships and tribes. So 1:51:10.240 --> 1:51:12.200 if you haven't gone to Good Vibe Retreat, yet, and 1:51:12.280 --> 1:51:15.160 you've been waiting. Here's your chance. You can make payments. 1:51:15.280 --> 1:51:17.280 Just put a five hundred dollars deposit. If we make 1:51:17.360 --> 1:51:19.720 it easy, Just get your flight, put your deposit, make 1:51:19.800 --> 1:51:24.000 payments and pull up. This is the one vacation you 1:51:24.040 --> 1:51:25.120 don't have to worry about shit. 1:51:25.240 --> 1:51:25.679 We've worried. 1:51:25.720 --> 1:51:29.920 We've done everything for you, all the activities, the place 1:51:30.040 --> 1:51:32.679 we stay is beautiful, the food is bombed. You literally 1:51:32.720 --> 1:51:35.120 don't have to think about shit. Let the good moms 1:51:35.200 --> 1:51:39.040 nurture you. And that's it, all right, guys, We'll see 1:51:39.040 --> 1:51:40.840 you next week. Love you, bye bye. 1:52:00.080 --> 1:52:00.280 Oh. 1:52:00.600 --> 1:52:02.439 This is moll be a Ella a J. 1:52:03.080 --> 1:52:14.840 Solova record The Lalas and Elasism