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Speaker 1: Hi, and welcome back to Carol Marcowitz Show on iHeartRadio.

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Speaker 1: Kicking it off today with one of these advice segments

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Speaker 1: that you all seem to enjoy so much. And if

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Speaker 1: you've got questions, write in at Carol Maarkowitz Show at

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Speaker 1: gmail dot com. And I'll also post an anonymous form

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Speaker 1: from time to time on X. My guest today to

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Speaker 1: answer the question that I received is the co author

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Speaker 1: of the book I wrote, Stolen Youth, my friend Bethany Mandel,

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Speaker 1: who does the fantastic substack The mom Wars, which you

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Speaker 1: should go sign up for right now. Hi. Bethany, so

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Speaker 1: nice to have you on.

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Speaker 2: Also a podcast if people will.

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Speaker 1: Past also a podcast. Yes, absolutely have to tape. It's great.

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Speaker 1: The mom Wars is so good. We read it in

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Speaker 1: our house. I've had my kids read some of the pieces.

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Speaker 1: It's really fantastic. Be thank you does a fantastic job there.

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Speaker 1: All right, I got this question and I was literally like,

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Speaker 1: I have to bring on Bethany to answer it because

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Speaker 1: it well, let's get into it.

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Speaker 2: You didn't even preview it for me.

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Speaker 1: I know. I like the not previewing it. Buck Sexton,

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Speaker 1: who comes on here a lot to answer questions. He

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Speaker 1: doesn't like to have the previews, and I'm kind of

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Speaker 1: into it now too, just to you know, go in blind.

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Speaker 3: All right, here we.

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Speaker 1: Go, Hi, Carol. I've been listening to your show since

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Speaker 1: the first episode, and I love the advice segments. I

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Speaker 1: wish you did more of them. All right, maybe we will.

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Speaker 1: I never thought i'd write in, but I feel like

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Speaker 1: I'm losing my mind and need your thoughts. My husband

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Speaker 1: and I live in a small city where he grew up.

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Speaker 1: We're both committed Christians and moved here to be closer

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Speaker 1: to his church. About a year ago, he stopped wanting

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Speaker 1: to go as regularly. This was a big change for us,

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Speaker 1: but I let it slide. I still took the kids,

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Speaker 1: now aged four and two, most sundays. Our plan was

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Speaker 1: for me to homeschool the kids, and now my husband

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Speaker 1: is saying he doesn't want to do that anymore either.

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Speaker 1: Writing this all out now, I realize he sounds erratic,

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Speaker 1: but he really is not. He's a great man, works hard,

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Speaker 1: home every night, nothing strange When we talk about it,

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Speaker 1: he says he still feels close to God without church,

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Speaker 1: and about the homeschooling, he says he wants the boys

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Speaker 1: to go to the same small Christian school he went

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Speaker 1: to because it's a great community. I'm just confused, and

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Speaker 1: our conversations aren't going anywhere. He is as loving and

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Speaker 1: warm as ever, but just completely disrupting our plan for

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Speaker 1: our lives. Do I roll with it or fight? Now? Normally,

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Speaker 1: when Bethany and I are on a segment together, I

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Speaker 1: hope to go first because we're going to say the

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Speaker 1: same thing. So I rather go together, be the first

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Speaker 1: one to go. And you know, you gotta wing it

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Speaker 1: for your answer, but you know, because you've done me

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Speaker 1: the honor of coming on my show, I'll let you

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Speaker 1: take this one first.

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Speaker 2: All right. So that's tricky. I mean, I think I

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Speaker 2: think that it's a good sign that he wants the

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Speaker 2: kids to go to a Christian school, that he doesn't

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Speaker 2: want to send them public and so he doesn't want

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Speaker 2: to like totally forsake everything that they did agree upon.

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Speaker 2: I kind of kind of lean in favor of letting

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Speaker 2: him his reasoning is not bad. We went into you know,

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Speaker 2: being parents, not knowing what we wanted to do, and

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Speaker 2: we changed and seth My husband changed also, and I

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Speaker 2: think that you need that flexibility, and you know, if

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Speaker 2: they If he had said I want to send the

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Speaker 2: kids public I think that's where I would say, stand

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Speaker 2: up and fight interesting wanting to have them the same experience,

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Speaker 2: the same Christian school. I think that's fair. I think

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Speaker 2: that if there's like money concerns, those are really valid

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Speaker 2: and if that exists, I would say, let's just try

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Speaker 2: kindergarten and see how it goes. Because that's how I

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Speaker 2: kind of like sunk Seth, I like hooked him in.

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Speaker 2: I was like, let's just see how kindergarten goes. And

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Speaker 2: kindergarten was twenty nineteen to twenty twenty perfect. They're now

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Speaker 2: very easy, and we're like, I think we're seven years in.

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Speaker 2: I think I would I think I would say to

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Speaker 2: the husband, okay, but let's reevaluate at the end of

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Speaker 2: kindergarten unless there's a money concern, which there just might be.

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Speaker 1: Right. So it's interesting because my first instinct here is

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Speaker 1: to be like, something's going on with this husband, and

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Speaker 1: I'm glad that she took the time to say no,

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Speaker 1: I don't think so, because you know, my kids always say,

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Speaker 1: you always think everyone's on drugs, and that's you know,

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Speaker 1: I grew up in Brooklyn, yes, I think everyone's on drugs,

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Speaker 1: you know.

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Speaker 2: So, But I will say, like the fact that he

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Speaker 2: wants them to go to a Christian school that get

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Speaker 2: him back in right.

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Speaker 1: Right, That's what is giving me pause. It's not like

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Speaker 1: he abandoned the church and then abandoned their plans for

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Speaker 1: homeschooling and decided to go live a more secular life.

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Speaker 1: I don't know what's going on with him and not

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Speaker 1: going to church, especially, as she points out in the

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Speaker 1: in the question, they move to his city to be

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Speaker 1: closer to his church. I don't know that I would

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Speaker 1: find that very you know. I think i'd be worried

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Speaker 1: about that if I were her, because you made this

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Speaker 1: move for that. So it's interesting because I was thinking, like,

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Speaker 1: what if Seth had said to no, Bethany, we won't

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Speaker 1: be homeschooling these kids, like I need them to go

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Speaker 1: to Orthodoxy Shiva, and I this has to be the

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Speaker 1: way it goes, Like what would you have done?

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Speaker 2: I would have told him to get a job at

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Speaker 2: a law firm because we can't afford it. I mean,

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Speaker 2: that's it. That's it, Like it's I was I was

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Speaker 2: doing the math with our kids and we would have

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Speaker 2: to we would have to bring in like hundreds of

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Speaker 2: thousands more dollars, right, and you have the same life

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Speaker 2: of six of them. Yeah, yeah, yeah, And I wasn't

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Speaker 2: willing to have fewer children for the sake of paying

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Speaker 2: for private school. So and he was on the same page,

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Speaker 2: and so we were both there. But I mean, that's

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Speaker 2: why I that's why I coveated my answer with the money, Like,

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Speaker 2: if tuition is too much of a stretch, then that's

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Speaker 2: that's where you kind of stand up and say no. Right,

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Speaker 2: But I think that like sending them to the private

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Speaker 2: Christian school might actually work out for them because you know,

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Speaker 2: you can tell him and this is probably not even wrong.

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Speaker 2: Attending church is a requisite sending our kids to this school.

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Speaker 2: Sorry at him, out of my hands.

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Speaker 3: Right.

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Speaker 1: So it's also interesting because she doesn't say does she

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Speaker 1: still stay at home? Will she have to go out

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Speaker 1: and go get a job? None of that is addressed

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Speaker 1: in the question, which would be another change, right if

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Speaker 1: she was planning to be a stay at home mom

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Speaker 1: and homeschool these kids, and now the husband is saying, well, no,

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Speaker 1: I want them to go to this other school. What

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Speaker 1: happens to her? Are they going to have more kids.

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Speaker 1: I mean, there's obviously there's always with these kinds of questions,

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Speaker 1: details that are not included. So you know, I would say,

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Speaker 1: monitor the husband's behavior and general demeanor and see if

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Speaker 1: there is something actually going on with him. Yeah, it

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Speaker 1: doesn't I get you know, I was joking. It doesn't

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Speaker 1: actually have to be drugs. It could be any number

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Speaker 1: of things. It could just be you know, malaise, It

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Speaker 1: could be any any change. Yeah, people change, right, So

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Speaker 1: that's the other thing I was going to say is

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Speaker 1: that my husband and I got together with the plan

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Speaker 1: that we would live in New York forever, and if

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Speaker 1: one of us didn't want to do that, that would

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Speaker 1: be crazy. Who would want to round for divorce? Rounds

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Speaker 1: for divorce? Right here, we are four years into our

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Speaker 1: Florida life, and obviously things changed. So my advice, watch

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Speaker 1: the husband a little bit, but take it, you know,

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Speaker 1: with a grain of salt, that your plan is always

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Speaker 1: going to be the plan.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. If people are unconvinced about Florida, they should just

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Speaker 2: look at the picture of us side by side. Right now.

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Speaker 2: I am so pale and you are golden.

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Speaker 1: Am I I'm also I'm gonna sweater because it's freezing

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Speaker 1: in my house. But yeah, we often when Mary Catherine

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Speaker 1: and I record, she's like in a tank top because

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Speaker 1: the heat's on in her, you know, in her uh

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Speaker 1: DC area home, and I'm gonna usually in a sweatshirt

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Speaker 1: or sweater because we have the AC set to like

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Speaker 1: sixty eight. I love it. Well. Thank you so much

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Speaker 1: for coming on, Bethany Mandel. Follow her at Bethany Sean

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Speaker 1: Dark on the x platform and check out the mom Wars,

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Speaker 1: both the substack and the podcast. Thank you again, Bethany.

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Speaker 1: We'll talk to you again soon.

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Speaker 2: Sounds good. Thanks for having me.

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Speaker 1: We're going to take a quick break and be right

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Speaker 1: back on the Carol Markowitz Show. Hi, and welcome back

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Speaker 1: to the Carol Markowitz Show on iHeartRadio. My guest today

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Speaker 1: is John Ashbrook, co host of the Ruthless Podcast. Hi, John,

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Speaker 1: so nice to have you on.

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Speaker 3: Hey, Carol, It's great to be with you.

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Speaker 4: I mean, just just a real treat to spend some

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Speaker 4: time with you today.

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Speaker 1: The pleasure is really all mine. I'm a big fan

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Speaker 1: of the program and a big fan of yours for

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Speaker 1: a long time, so I'm looking forward to getting to

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Speaker 1: know a little bit more about you and Mary Katherine

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Speaker 1: Ham and I were on Ruthless together with you guys,

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Speaker 1: great show, and I learned I loved being on and

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Speaker 1: you guys are such good hosts. But I learned that

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Speaker 1: you're from Cincinnatati, Ohio, and I have a sister in

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Speaker 1: law from Cincinnati. And am I right to say that

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Speaker 1: people who are from Cincinnati are like really into Cincinnati

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Speaker 1: or is it just like the two of you.

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Speaker 3: No, it's very very fair to say.

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Speaker 4: I mean, you've got you have basically like the thought

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Speaker 4: process of somebody from Cincinnati, and you know, a lot

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Speaker 4: of other people from Ohio don't always consider Cincinnati as

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Speaker 4: part of Ohio.

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Speaker 3: Say it's like a nation state.

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Speaker 1: Oh really like its own thing.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, its own thing, its own thing, and you know what,

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Speaker 4: you just sort of embrace it if you're from if

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Speaker 4: you're from Cinci. Actually, culturally Cincinnati is very similar to Louisville,

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Speaker 4: very similar to Indianapolis. So it is it's a little

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Speaker 4: bit different from the rest of the state, but you know,

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Speaker 4: we are who we are.

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Speaker 1: I just don't see the same kind of like city

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Speaker 1: pride from like Columbus or Cleveland and other cities you

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Speaker 1: know of other states either. I just feel like Cincinnati

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Speaker 1: really has something where the people who are from Cincinnati

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Speaker 1: kind of want to get back to Cincinnati or see

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Speaker 1: as like this, you know, magical wonderland in which to live.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, well it's a great town. I mean you you

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Speaker 4: won't find a bigger fan than me. And I think

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Speaker 4: a lot of it comes from the fact that there

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Speaker 4: are a lot of very big families in Cincinnati, people

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Speaker 4: who like associate the town with all of their cousins,

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Speaker 4: all their aunts and their uncles and good times from

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Speaker 4: growing up, and it is it is a great place

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Speaker 4: to grow up, great place to raise a family. They've

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Speaker 4: got some big companies in town. And so I have

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Speaker 4: friends who have moved in in like middle age to

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Speaker 4: take jobs in the city and they're like, man, everybody

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Speaker 4: seems to already know have their group and have their

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Speaker 4: friends and so but it's a it's a it's it's

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Speaker 4: a great place to grow up.

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Speaker 1: But I love that. I love like places where people

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Speaker 1: don't want to leave or want to come back to.

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Speaker 1: Like that's that's sort of what we're all looking for, right, Yeah, yeah.

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Speaker 3: No, that's that's exactly right.

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Speaker 4: And I mean, you know you will also find I

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Speaker 4: mean you mentioned don't want to leave there. There is

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Speaker 4: also a steady migration of people from Cincinnati who moved

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Speaker 4: down to the west coast of Florida when they become a.

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Speaker 3: Certain age, right, yeah, yeah, yeah.

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Speaker 4: In Sarasota, Naples, Benita, fort Meyer, you will find a

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Speaker 4: lot of people who are from Cincinnati, probably a lot

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Speaker 4: of michigan a lot of Midwesterners. But you sort of

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Speaker 4: migrate down there and reconnect with people who maybe didn't

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Speaker 4: go to the same high school, but.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, familiar.

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Speaker 1: So how did you get into this thing of ours?

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Speaker 1: How did you become a podcaster at Ruthless?

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Speaker 4: Well, it starts. I mean, I've worked in politics for

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Speaker 4: twenty years.

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Speaker 3: You know.

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Speaker 4: Back in the day, I was a driver for my

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Speaker 4: local congressman. It was my first job in politics. And

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Speaker 4: then was a press secretary, actually the press secretary for

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Speaker 4: conservative talk radio back when that was kind of in

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Speaker 4: its heyday and Republicans wanted to make sure that they

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Speaker 4: had relationships with the talk radio shows, and so I

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Speaker 4: knew a lot of the producers and you know, and

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Speaker 4: I loved conservative talk radio, always loved it start to finish.

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Speaker 4: I used to listen from Bill Bennett in the morning

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Speaker 4: from six to nine, to Laura Ingram from nine to noon,

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Speaker 4: Rush Limbaugh noon to three, and then Sean Hannity three

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Speaker 4: to six, and then Mark Levin six on, and so

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Speaker 4: you know, you spend enough time listening to them and

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Speaker 4: getting familiar. You know, Hugh Hewett another great guy. You

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Speaker 4: spend enough time listening to them, you sort of you

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Speaker 4: just develop an appreciation for how hard that job is

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Speaker 4: and how enjoyable it can be. And so, you know,

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Speaker 4: work my way through Republican politics. Was a consultant on

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Speaker 4: a bunch of Senate races over the years. And when

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Speaker 4: my buddies and I the other guys on the Ruthless

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Speaker 4: Show just sort of sitting around having lunch or hanging

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Speaker 4: out together.

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Speaker 3: At one point, and I think you've heard this story before, but.

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Speaker 1: I'll tell you hear it again.

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Speaker 4: Tell me during COVID we used to finish our days

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Speaker 4: on a zoom call and we would bet race horses

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Speaker 4: and we would drink bourbon and try to make each

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Speaker 4: other laugh. And at one point we were like, hey,

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Speaker 4: why don't we just try to turn this into a show.

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Speaker 4: And so, in a lot of ways, the Ruthless Podcast

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Speaker 4: was a hobby that was developed during COVID that turned

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Speaker 4: into something bigger, and I mean we had some ideas

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Speaker 4: about starting a media company and everything, but really it

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Speaker 4: germinated and came to full fruition during COVID and right

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Speaker 4: on the heels of COVID. We launched the show in

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Speaker 4: October of twenty twenty, right before, right before the twenty

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Speaker 4: twenty election, and we've been going ever since, six hundred

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Speaker 4: and some episodes.

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Speaker 1: I love it, You know, is it weird making the

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Speaker 1: transition from working in politics and you know, being kind

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Speaker 1: of anonymous to do you get recognized.

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Speaker 3: Now a little bit?

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Speaker 4: You know, you on the hill especially, you know Capitol Hill,

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Speaker 4: a place I worked for so long. You always you know,

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Speaker 4: you spend so much time up there, and you think, oh, well,

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Speaker 4: you know.

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Speaker 3: Put out a good press release.

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Speaker 4: Was a press secretary, and everybody's to be like, oh,

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Speaker 4: great press release.

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Speaker 3: But it's wild.

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Speaker 4: You go back there as somebody who's doing podcasting and

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Speaker 4: people are like, oh, no, I listened to the podcasts,

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Speaker 4: and so it's it is a lot of fun. It

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Speaker 4: is different than political communications, where usually you're trying to

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Speaker 4: sort of downplay the controversy. But on the show, you

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Speaker 4: always love the controversy. You love the fight no matter

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Speaker 4: who's fighting. Yeah, and you like talking about it and

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Speaker 4: what does each side think? And so that's a little

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Speaker 4: different set of muscles that you've got to work. But

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Speaker 4: it is so much fun and we could not be

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Speaker 4: having a better time than we do on our show.

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Speaker 1: I think what you guys do so well and what

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Speaker 1: Mary Catherine Hamm and I definitely try to emulate on

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Speaker 1: our show normally, is that you're providing information to your listeners,

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Speaker 1: but you're also actively trying to be funny, which I

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Speaker 1: don't think people do as much as they used to.

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Speaker 1: Like when I first got into writing, I think a

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Speaker 1: lot of writers were trying to be funny in their

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Speaker 1: serious topics, like Jonah Goldberg, Mark Stein. They all kind

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Speaker 1: of like would have funny turns of phrases, And I

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Speaker 1: think you guys do that so well, where you pair

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Speaker 1: humor with seriousness. Do you feel like.

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Speaker 4: That it's very kind of you to say that, Carol,

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Speaker 4: because I mean when you guys come on the show,

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Speaker 4: you and n MK, I mean, we absolutely love it

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Speaker 4: because you get the same sort of like Cadence, you're

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Speaker 4: interested in the same sort of things you're interested in,

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Speaker 4: not taking yourselves too seriously, and that's what we do

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Speaker 4: on our show, where it's like there's so much content

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Speaker 4: out there, particularly on the right over the last maybe

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Speaker 4: ten fifteen years, where everybody wants to read you the

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Speaker 4: federalist papers rue humorless. It's just it's like reading a

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Speaker 4: college term paper. And that's not how Rush was, you know,

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Speaker 4: and he was really the greatest. I mean, he really

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Speaker 4: set the tone for so many of us. And I

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Speaker 4: would imagine you, I imagine MK, and I know all

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Speaker 4: the other guys on our show, we remember either driving

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Speaker 4: around in the car with our parents or at some

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Speaker 4: point in our lives you're listening to EIB network and

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Speaker 4: you're laughing, you're getting information, and you've got a guy

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Speaker 4: who is absolutely at the top of his game in broadcasting,

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Speaker 4: changing media in ways that I don't think he ever

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Speaker 4: thought he would at the very beginning. But over time

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Speaker 4: he really changed things. And you know a lot of

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Speaker 4: that had to do with his humor and not taking

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Speaker 4: things too seriously. So that's you know, we're just we're

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Speaker 4: just emulating what we learned from the greats.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I really love that. What would you be doing

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Speaker 1: if it wasn't this would you have a plan B

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Speaker 1: that you would have pursued.

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Speaker 4: You know, when I was a kid, I wanted to

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Speaker 4: be a fighter pilot and a pro baseball player. As

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Speaker 4: an adult, I don't know, it's way too late for

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Speaker 4: me on that. I mean, as an adult, I would

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Speaker 4: love to be a coach or I'd love to be

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Speaker 4: a pro golfer or something like that. I mean, but

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Speaker 4: I actually absolutely love what we do with the show

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Speaker 4: because we get to do it with our friends, and

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Speaker 4: what people hear on our show is exactly what we're

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Speaker 4: doing when the cameras are off. I mean, the same

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Speaker 4: conversations where you know, we don't cut anything on our show,

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Speaker 4: so if I say something dumb, everybody laughs at me.

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Speaker 4: But that's the way it is when you're with your friends.

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Speaker 4: You know, nobody, nobody says everything perfectly every single time,

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Speaker 4: you know, And I think the audience really likes that

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Speaker 4: they relate to that.

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Speaker 3: I mean, it adds a layer.

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Speaker 4: Of authenticity that you don't always get with the you know,

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Speaker 4: the the legacy media where everything's perfect and read perfectly

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Speaker 4: and everything is like that's it's it's not human. You know,

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Speaker 4: people disagree on things, People have takes that don't come

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Speaker 4: off right, and you know, like I feel like that's

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Speaker 4: that's what the audience is really hungry for, is some reality.

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Speaker 3: You know, they know people aren't robots, they know people aren't.

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Speaker 1: Perfect, and they feel like they want to get to

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Speaker 1: know you, and they do do that on shows like yours,

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Speaker 1: where they get to know you as a person, like

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Speaker 1: somebody who has interest in hobbies outside of just giving

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Speaker 1: your opinion on stuff. Right, So, I don't know. I

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Speaker 1: don't think it's too late for you to be a

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Speaker 1: professional baseball player or a fighter pilot. Certainly not too

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Speaker 1: late to be a pro golfer. You're pretty into golf, right.

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Speaker 3: I love it. I absolutely love it.

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Speaker 4: I mean, my my hopes and dreams were the same

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Speaker 4: as every other base every other regular boy growing up

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Speaker 4: in America. You know, at the time that we grew up.

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Speaker 4: It's it's not different from anybody else. And it's it's

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Speaker 4: a lot of fun because the guys who we do

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Speaker 4: I do the show with same hope, same dreams when

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Speaker 4: they were kids, and now we're now we're doing a

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Speaker 4: show together and talking about our lives. And you know,

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Speaker 4: things change as you grow up, things change as you

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Speaker 4: you know, you have kids, and you know, new challenges,

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Speaker 4: new complications that you always heard about when you were

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Speaker 4: a kid from your parents telling you things, and now

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Speaker 4: you get to experience it in real life.

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Speaker 1: I've only golfed once. I didn't really love I didn't

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Speaker 1: really love my the golfing outfits. I have to kind of,

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Speaker 1: you know, peruse more more possibility.

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Speaker 3: We got to change that, Carol.

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Speaker 4: We need to we need to do like a Carol

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Speaker 4: Ruthless fellows go golfing.

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Speaker 1: Do you guys sell the Ruthless merch golf outfit for women?

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Speaker 1: Because I feel like that would be a hit.

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Speaker 3: We're gonna start doing it now.

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Speaker 4: I'm gonna have Michael Bucking sit on the sewing machine

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Speaker 4: for putting these things together.

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Speaker 1: I love that. What are you most proud of in

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Speaker 1: your life?

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Speaker 4: You know you you asked me this question before, and

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Speaker 4: I was thinking about a lot of different things. But

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Speaker 4: I have to tell you, sitting here right now, it

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Speaker 4: is one hundred percent my children. I've got three daughters,

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Speaker 4: and I love these girls more than life itself. My

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Speaker 4: oldest her, she's a singer. She has such a beautiful voice.

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Speaker 4: She's sixteen years old. Wow, and when she sings it

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Speaker 4: brings tears to your eyes. And so my wife and

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Speaker 4: I on weekends we usually listen to music just to

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Speaker 4: sort of wind down, and I always throw on something

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Speaker 4: that she's sung that's sitting in my iPhone. She hates

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Speaker 4: it when I do that, but I'm like, hey, I'm

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Speaker 4: not allowed to listen to my favorite singer in my

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Speaker 4: own house. She is so talented, Carol. I cannot tell

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Speaker 4: you how talented this girl is. She's so good. And

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Speaker 4: then my second daughter has down syndrome, so she has

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Speaker 4: got a little bit of a different track in life,

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Speaker 4: but she is really the sort of like, brings so

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Speaker 4: much humor to our house, brings so much life to

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Speaker 4: our house and waste, and her takes on things are

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Speaker 4: just so different than you would ever expect. She's always

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Speaker 4: got us laughing. And then my youngest girl is really

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Speaker 4: into basketball, really into sports right now, so she is

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Speaker 4: like all into her team and her friends, and so

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Speaker 4: it's just so much fun.

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Speaker 1: You really have the range. That's funny, I do.

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Speaker 4: It's so much fun watching them experience life and seeing

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Speaker 4: things through their eyes and hearing their takes on everything

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Speaker 4: and listening to them as they grow up. It parenting

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Speaker 4: is the greatest thing that could ever happen to a person.

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Speaker 4: I mean, it really comes with the chair of frustrations

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Speaker 4: and it's obviously exhausting, but there is nothing better in

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Speaker 4: life than kids.

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Speaker 1: Absolutely. I feel like there's this messaging right now, you know,

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Speaker 1: I think it's actually aimed at young men more than

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Speaker 1: young women at this point, Like it used to be

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Speaker 1: more at young women, but there's been a collapse in

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Speaker 1: the idea that young men should have kids. And I

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Speaker 1: think that talking about how amazing parenting is, especially on

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Speaker 1: shows like Ruthless, I think it goes a long way

435
00:21:47,040 --> 00:21:49,879
Speaker 1: to changing that conversation. Do you see that, like do

436
00:21:49,920 --> 00:21:53,160
Speaker 1: you do you see that messaging aimed at men now?

437
00:21:53,720 --> 00:21:57,200
Speaker 3: Well, maybe a little bit, but you know, we are

438
00:21:57,240 --> 00:21:57,800
Speaker 3: who we are.

439
00:21:57,840 --> 00:22:00,439
Speaker 4: We you know, the three out of the four of

440
00:22:00,520 --> 00:22:03,440
Speaker 4: us have kids, and you're sort of sort of going

441
00:22:03,480 --> 00:22:06,280
Speaker 4: through life at the same stage together and you sort

442
00:22:06,280 --> 00:22:09,359
Speaker 4: of take it as it comes. And I don't think

443
00:22:09,400 --> 00:22:13,119
Speaker 4: that you really have an appreciation for how much of

444
00:22:13,160 --> 00:22:16,440
Speaker 4: an absolute blessing kids are until you have them, until

445
00:22:16,440 --> 00:22:19,200
Speaker 4: you've gone through the hard things to the point where you're.

446
00:22:19,080 --> 00:22:21,439
Speaker 1: Like, oh no, no, what you don't know right exactly?

447
00:22:21,520 --> 00:22:24,600
Speaker 4: Yeah, till you're like, wow, that's actually funny. I can't

448
00:22:24,640 --> 00:22:27,520
Speaker 4: believe they you know, like they add so much to life.

449
00:22:27,560 --> 00:22:30,480
Speaker 4: It's just it is such a life giving experience that

450
00:22:31,000 --> 00:22:35,359
Speaker 4: everybody has to has to and even even if you

451
00:22:35,359 --> 00:22:37,879
Speaker 4: know there's so many people who can't have kids, you know,

452
00:22:38,160 --> 00:22:41,199
Speaker 4: and but I know that they I know, I know

453
00:22:41,320 --> 00:22:44,600
Speaker 4: several several people who are in that boat, but like

454
00:22:45,080 --> 00:22:48,800
Speaker 4: surround themselves with nieces and nephews because they see how

455
00:22:48,880 --> 00:22:52,480
Speaker 4: much life that just brings back to you. In middle age.

456
00:22:52,880 --> 00:22:56,640
Speaker 1: Yeah, I think that there's you know, this push to

457
00:22:56,680 --> 00:22:59,000
Speaker 1: portray it as joyless when it's one of the most

458
00:22:59,080 --> 00:23:00,440
Speaker 1: joyful experience, says a.

459
00:23:00,440 --> 00:23:02,119
Speaker 3: Human can have, and it's incredible.

460
00:23:02,600 --> 00:23:07,200
Speaker 1: I hope that young people can avoid the messaging aimed

461
00:23:07,240 --> 00:23:10,560
Speaker 1: at them because it's really it's a negative. It's such

462
00:23:10,600 --> 00:23:13,240
Speaker 1: a negative to believe something like that.

463
00:23:13,440 --> 00:23:16,480
Speaker 4: Yeah, it is exhausting, but the exhaustion is worth it.

464
00:23:16,560 --> 00:23:18,720
Speaker 4: The exhaustion is absolutely worth it.

465
00:23:18,800 --> 00:23:20,280
Speaker 1: How old is your youngest.

466
00:23:20,119 --> 00:23:21,160
Speaker 3: My youngest is eleven.

467
00:23:21,400 --> 00:23:23,760
Speaker 1: Okay, yeah, so you're a little bit past the like

468
00:23:23,880 --> 00:23:27,160
Speaker 1: not sleeping, I mean, yeah, your sleep never really goes

469
00:23:27,200 --> 00:23:29,520
Speaker 1: back to normal, but you're not in the crying in

470
00:23:29,520 --> 00:23:31,080
Speaker 1: the middle of the night, right.

471
00:23:31,400 --> 00:23:34,199
Speaker 4: Right, But the problem has become more complicated and you

472
00:23:34,280 --> 00:23:36,760
Speaker 4: have to really think about your answers to the questions.

473
00:23:36,800 --> 00:23:39,840
Speaker 4: And thankfully, you know, my wife is a brilliant woman,

474
00:23:39,920 --> 00:23:43,080
Speaker 4: and she is she's always on point with the things

475
00:23:43,080 --> 00:23:43,920
Speaker 4: that they're thinking.

476
00:23:44,040 --> 00:23:45,120
Speaker 3: And like, I'm just a guy.

477
00:23:45,200 --> 00:23:48,960
Speaker 4: I mean, I don't think from a girl's perspective, but

478
00:23:49,040 --> 00:23:51,120
Speaker 4: she always does and she always knows the right thing

479
00:23:51,160 --> 00:23:51,560
Speaker 4: to say.

480
00:23:51,760 --> 00:23:54,440
Speaker 1: Yeah, and dads are so important, So I'm sure, I'm

481
00:23:54,480 --> 00:23:56,600
Speaker 1: sure you do a great job, do what I can.

482
00:23:56,800 --> 00:23:58,720
Speaker 1: We're going to take a quick break and be right

483
00:23:58,760 --> 00:24:04,280
Speaker 1: back on the Carol Marko which show. Give us a

484
00:24:04,400 --> 00:24:07,800
Speaker 1: five year out prediction, and it could be about anything

485
00:24:07,840 --> 00:24:08,160
Speaker 1: at all.

486
00:24:08,720 --> 00:24:11,800
Speaker 3: I mean, I am, I am.

487
00:24:12,280 --> 00:24:16,639
Speaker 4: I'm hard pressed to predict anything with any degree of certainty.

488
00:24:17,480 --> 00:24:19,840
Speaker 4: Five years out from today. I'd like to be able

489
00:24:19,840 --> 00:24:21,679
Speaker 4: to say the Cincinnati Bengals are going to be in

490
00:24:21,680 --> 00:24:23,840
Speaker 4: a super Bowl again. I like to be able to

491
00:24:23,880 --> 00:24:26,800
Speaker 4: crazy Cincinnati Brads are going to go to the World Series.

492
00:24:26,800 --> 00:24:29,639
Speaker 4: I'd like to be able to say that Republicans will

493
00:24:30,240 --> 00:24:32,719
Speaker 4: hold control of government and then we're going to get

494
00:24:32,760 --> 00:24:36,560
Speaker 4: America back on track. But all of that stuff is

495
00:24:37,600 --> 00:24:38,200
Speaker 4: you don't know.

496
00:24:38,600 --> 00:24:40,199
Speaker 3: You know, it's it is.

497
00:24:40,520 --> 00:24:44,119
Speaker 4: Life is such a day by day thing, and you know,

498
00:24:44,280 --> 00:24:48,040
Speaker 4: time March is on no matter what, and so I

499
00:24:48,080 --> 00:24:50,600
Speaker 4: feel like five years out is such a hard thing.

500
00:24:51,400 --> 00:24:53,240
Speaker 1: So we asked the hard questions on here.

501
00:24:53,359 --> 00:24:56,520
Speaker 3: You know, it's a very hard question, Carol, it is.

502
00:24:56,760 --> 00:24:57,800
Speaker 3: It's really tough.

503
00:24:58,000 --> 00:25:00,960
Speaker 4: I mean, I can talk about like my hopes and

504
00:25:01,000 --> 00:25:04,800
Speaker 4: wishes and my dreams, but I feel like the.

505
00:25:04,760 --> 00:25:06,800
Speaker 1: Bengals, the Reds and the Republican Party.

506
00:25:07,000 --> 00:25:09,840
Speaker 3: I mean, that's what I'm hoping, That's what I'm hoping.

507
00:25:09,880 --> 00:25:10,840
Speaker 3: We'll see if it happens.

508
00:25:10,840 --> 00:25:13,879
Speaker 1: You know, I'll say that you predicted the Bengals and

509
00:25:14,160 --> 00:25:17,120
Speaker 1: the Reds and you know, the Publican Party. That can't

510
00:25:17,160 --> 00:25:17,879
Speaker 1: be your problem.

511
00:25:17,920 --> 00:25:20,920
Speaker 3: Also, you know, yeah, right right right right.

512
00:25:21,720 --> 00:25:23,840
Speaker 1: Well, I've loved getting to know you a little bit

513
00:25:23,840 --> 00:25:27,000
Speaker 1: more and I think we should definitely go golf together.

514
00:25:27,040 --> 00:25:31,359
Speaker 1: Although I'm obviously terrible. Leave us here with your best

515
00:25:31,400 --> 00:25:34,879
Speaker 1: tip for my listeners on how they can improve their lives.

516
00:25:35,800 --> 00:25:38,480
Speaker 4: I think the absolute best thing that I can say

517
00:25:38,800 --> 00:25:41,560
Speaker 4: is you've got to unplug, and you've got to just

518
00:25:41,720 --> 00:25:44,520
Speaker 4: take some time. You've got to put your iPhone down,

519
00:25:44,680 --> 00:25:46,680
Speaker 4: you got to put Twitter down. You got to put

520
00:25:46,840 --> 00:25:50,679
Speaker 4: the hardests and the texts and everything down and just

521
00:25:51,280 --> 00:25:53,840
Speaker 4: live life with those who are around you for some

522
00:25:54,119 --> 00:25:57,280
Speaker 4: period of time, maybe that's on Friday night. Put it

523
00:25:57,320 --> 00:25:59,560
Speaker 4: down and just spend time with your family, or spend

524
00:25:59,600 --> 00:26:02,600
Speaker 4: time with you your friends, and actually interact with people

525
00:26:02,760 --> 00:26:06,040
Speaker 4: in the way that you're supposed to interact them.

526
00:26:05,520 --> 00:26:05,760
Speaker 2: It is.

527
00:26:06,440 --> 00:26:10,399
Speaker 4: It is so gratifying to spend time with people in

528
00:26:10,560 --> 00:26:14,000
Speaker 4: real life and not on You know, as much as

529
00:26:14,000 --> 00:26:17,240
Speaker 4: I love X, as much as I love messaging and calling,

530
00:26:17,359 --> 00:26:20,520
Speaker 4: I love all of those things so much, but interacting

531
00:26:20,560 --> 00:26:22,879
Speaker 4: with people in real life when you're not connected to

532
00:26:22,960 --> 00:26:25,520
Speaker 4: a phone is just one of the best things that

533
00:26:25,800 --> 00:26:29,399
Speaker 4: I think you can do, and it always energizes you

534
00:26:29,480 --> 00:26:30,960
Speaker 4: in a way that you'd never expect.

535
00:26:31,240 --> 00:26:34,119
Speaker 1: Yeah, touching grass and living your life in real life

536
00:26:34,240 --> 00:26:38,160
Speaker 1: exactly the best piece of advice possible. He is John Ashbrook.

537
00:26:38,240 --> 00:26:41,120
Speaker 1: Check him out at the Ruthless Podcast. Thank you so much,

538
00:26:41,200 --> 00:26:42,000
Speaker 1: John for coming on.

539
00:26:42,320 --> 00:26:43,080
Speaker 3: Thank you Carol,