1
00:00:00,160 --> 00:00:03,120
Speaker 1: Welcome to Carefully Reckless, the production of Our Heart Radio

2
00:00:03,240 --> 00:00:21,239
Speaker 1: and the Black Effect. And just like Dad, we're back

3
00:00:21,280 --> 00:00:24,120
Speaker 1: on the air. Welcome back to another Carefully Reckless episode

4
00:00:24,120 --> 00:00:27,160
Speaker 1: with your girl dress hilarious. Now, listen, two things happened

5
00:00:27,160 --> 00:00:29,200
Speaker 1: to me in the past week that I need to

6
00:00:29,240 --> 00:00:30,840
Speaker 1: talk to you all about. All right, grab your t

7
00:00:31,000 --> 00:00:36,440
Speaker 1: grab your halls. It's story time. Okay. So me and

8
00:00:36,479 --> 00:00:40,240
Speaker 1: my homegirl we're at a restaurant, okay, and it's five star.

9
00:00:40,400 --> 00:00:43,440
Speaker 1: It's really nice. It's a couple sitting across from us.

10
00:00:43,720 --> 00:00:46,080
Speaker 1: Now this is like a dating scene or whatever, or

11
00:00:46,120 --> 00:00:47,559
Speaker 1: if you want to just get dressed up and go

12
00:00:47,600 --> 00:00:50,280
Speaker 1: out have fun with your home girls, take some drinks

13
00:00:50,280 --> 00:00:52,640
Speaker 1: and ship. This is the place to get dressed up for.

14
00:00:53,080 --> 00:00:57,000
Speaker 1: Like I said, five star restaurant. The ambiance is beautiful,

15
00:00:57,480 --> 00:01:00,960
Speaker 1: nothing less than ballroom. Okay. Back to the couple across

16
00:01:01,000 --> 00:01:03,560
Speaker 1: from us. Now we see them. They're into each other.

17
00:01:03,960 --> 00:01:06,520
Speaker 1: They're like loving on each other. He's complimenting her and

18
00:01:06,560 --> 00:01:09,520
Speaker 1: we're nosy, so we hear this. She's complimenting him back.

19
00:01:09,840 --> 00:01:12,520
Speaker 1: They're cute. I love it, little cute, beautiful black couple.

20
00:01:12,880 --> 00:01:15,200
Speaker 1: Now she had on a beautiful gown It wasn't like,

21
00:01:15,720 --> 00:01:18,720
Speaker 1: you know, giving Taylor Swift like stupid gowns. It was

22
00:01:18,760 --> 00:01:21,280
Speaker 1: given like, oh, I'm a bad bitch. It was giving

23
00:01:21,319 --> 00:01:23,640
Speaker 1: like adult prom like. It was very cute though it's

24
00:01:23,760 --> 00:01:26,040
Speaker 1: very cute. He had on his nice little fitted suit.

25
00:01:26,120 --> 00:01:28,200
Speaker 1: It was cute without the blazer though. It wasn't like

26
00:01:28,240 --> 00:01:30,920
Speaker 1: giving church like, but it was given like very Kirk Franklin. Issh. Now,

27
00:01:30,920 --> 00:01:32,600
Speaker 1: if y'all know anything about Kirk Franklin, y'all know what

28
00:01:32,600 --> 00:01:34,440
Speaker 1: that man can dress his ass off. I love it.

29
00:01:34,680 --> 00:01:37,120
Speaker 1: So he had his nice little waves and she had

30
00:01:37,120 --> 00:01:40,600
Speaker 1: her cute little weave. They were cute. He gets up,

31
00:01:40,600 --> 00:01:43,479
Speaker 1: he goes to the bathroom. Now, I'm a very complimentative woman.

32
00:01:43,800 --> 00:01:47,039
Speaker 1: I compliment any woman that looks good, even if she don't.

33
00:01:47,080 --> 00:01:51,240
Speaker 1: It's nothing wrong with uplifting somebody. Even if you see

34
00:01:51,240 --> 00:01:53,240
Speaker 1: a girl and maybe she ain't in tip top shape,

35
00:01:53,240 --> 00:01:55,280
Speaker 1: tell her she's in tip top shape. Give her some

36
00:01:55,360 --> 00:01:58,880
Speaker 1: motivation to go get in tip top shape. You know

37
00:01:58,880 --> 00:02:01,280
Speaker 1: what I'm saying. Whatever I go over to I tell

38
00:02:01,280 --> 00:02:04,360
Speaker 1: her you look so fucking cute. You and your date

39
00:02:04,400 --> 00:02:06,480
Speaker 1: look great as a whole. Blah blah blah. She's like,

40
00:02:06,480 --> 00:02:08,880
Speaker 1: thank you, so much. She's like, you're Jess. I'm like, no,

41
00:02:08,960 --> 00:02:11,200
Speaker 1: I'm Samantha. She's like you're lying. I'm like, okay, it's me.

42
00:02:11,240 --> 00:02:13,720
Speaker 1: It's Jess. And so I walk away or whatever I

43
00:02:13,800 --> 00:02:16,200
Speaker 1: tell her. She looks cute. He comes back, the exchange

44
00:02:16,200 --> 00:02:18,679
Speaker 1: a few words. He never sat down. This man got

45
00:02:18,680 --> 00:02:21,600
Speaker 1: on his knee and he pulled a ring out of

46
00:02:21,639 --> 00:02:23,440
Speaker 1: his little man purse. Now, yes, he did have a

47
00:02:23,440 --> 00:02:26,120
Speaker 1: man purse. He did not walk in there with it

48
00:02:26,240 --> 00:02:28,799
Speaker 1: like carrying it, you know what I'm saying over his shoulder,

49
00:02:28,800 --> 00:02:31,919
Speaker 1: because that would look like tragically stupid. But he had

50
00:02:31,960 --> 00:02:35,639
Speaker 1: a man purse. He pulled a ring box out of

51
00:02:35,880 --> 00:02:39,960
Speaker 1: his man purse right, got on his knee. I'm talking about.

52
00:02:40,000 --> 00:02:42,079
Speaker 1: He bent up that slippery earl. Now, if you don't

53
00:02:42,080 --> 00:02:44,960
Speaker 1: know what a slippery earl is, you ain't black. It's

54
00:02:44,960 --> 00:02:46,880
Speaker 1: a church sho But his was cute. It was like

55
00:02:46,880 --> 00:02:49,040
Speaker 1: a cute little doch in gabana church shoe. He was.

56
00:02:49,120 --> 00:02:53,040
Speaker 1: He was very, very cute. He proposed to this beautiful girl.

57
00:02:53,840 --> 00:02:55,679
Speaker 1: Me and my homegirl was so fucking happy. I'm talking

58
00:02:55,680 --> 00:02:59,359
Speaker 1: about we were screaming like we was telling other tables

59
00:02:59,560 --> 00:03:01,840
Speaker 1: alert them, like look y'all, look, pay attention to y'all.

60
00:03:01,880 --> 00:03:04,240
Speaker 1: He about to propose to her. This is beautiful. So

61
00:03:04,280 --> 00:03:07,520
Speaker 1: now the whole fucking restaurant just about is looking at them,

62
00:03:07,720 --> 00:03:10,119
Speaker 1: and he goes, blah blah blah blah blah blah blah

63
00:03:10,120 --> 00:03:13,320
Speaker 1: blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah, will you

64
00:03:13,360 --> 00:03:20,520
Speaker 1: marry me? Bitch? I like to just die. I pulled

65
00:03:20,520 --> 00:03:23,800
Speaker 1: out my phone and we recorded everybody recording this ship

66
00:03:25,440 --> 00:03:32,720
Speaker 1: and she said no. Yeah, she she said no to

67
00:03:32,880 --> 00:03:39,760
Speaker 1: my man's and everybody immediately immediately stopped recording. It was

68
00:03:40,200 --> 00:03:43,680
Speaker 1: not a moment for that. And um, it was very sad,

69
00:03:43,760 --> 00:03:46,600
Speaker 1: i'm gonna say, because the whole restaurant got quiet. It

70
00:03:46,800 --> 00:03:51,800
Speaker 1: was like silence. Not even a fucking cricket was present.

71
00:03:52,040 --> 00:03:55,200
Speaker 1: It was even more awkward than if a cricket would

72
00:03:55,320 --> 00:04:00,760
Speaker 1: be present there. Um, so I just started clapping. I

73
00:04:00,800 --> 00:04:06,160
Speaker 1: was like, well, great, maybe y'all are not ready. And

74
00:04:06,240 --> 00:04:09,280
Speaker 1: he turned around and he noticed who I was, and

75
00:04:09,320 --> 00:04:13,560
Speaker 1: he was like even more embarrassed because he had saw

76
00:04:13,600 --> 00:04:16,760
Speaker 1: me recording. And I was like, I will never post this.

77
00:04:16,960 --> 00:04:20,039
Speaker 1: I will never hurt your feelings or put your business

78
00:04:20,080 --> 00:04:22,920
Speaker 1: out there like that. But here I am today talking

79
00:04:22,920 --> 00:04:24,480
Speaker 1: about it on the podcast, which I think is more

80
00:04:24,520 --> 00:04:27,920
Speaker 1: respectful than posting the video with with a guy proposing

81
00:04:27,920 --> 00:04:31,360
Speaker 1: and a girl saying now, now listen, that's that story time.

82
00:04:31,480 --> 00:04:33,880
Speaker 1: All right, I got another story I'm gonna get too later,

83
00:04:33,920 --> 00:04:35,880
Speaker 1: but this is what I want to talk to you

84
00:04:35,920 --> 00:04:38,279
Speaker 1: all about. That brings me to my question, is it

85
00:04:38,360 --> 00:04:42,760
Speaker 1: a dale breaker? Is the relationship over when the girl

86
00:04:42,800 --> 00:04:44,919
Speaker 1: says no, or even the guy? But in this case,

87
00:04:45,120 --> 00:04:48,960
Speaker 1: when the girl says no, is the relationship over? I

88
00:04:48,960 --> 00:04:51,599
Speaker 1: don't think it should be for quite a few reasons. Now,

89
00:04:51,640 --> 00:04:54,200
Speaker 1: y'all gonna ask me why I know this. Listen, I

90
00:04:54,279 --> 00:04:56,520
Speaker 1: told you they were all over each other. They were

91
00:04:56,560 --> 00:04:58,960
Speaker 1: like loving on each other. Usually these days, you go

92
00:04:59,000 --> 00:05:01,120
Speaker 1: out and you see people on dates, but they're in

93
00:05:01,160 --> 00:05:03,359
Speaker 1: their phones. They're not looking at each other, they're not

94
00:05:03,400 --> 00:05:05,800
Speaker 1: playing foot seas, they're not touching one another anymore than

95
00:05:05,839 --> 00:05:08,400
Speaker 1: I looking into each other's eyes. They were doing all

96
00:05:08,440 --> 00:05:10,840
Speaker 1: of that. Do you understand what I'm saying? They were

97
00:05:10,839 --> 00:05:12,440
Speaker 1: still a beautiful couple, and I can tell that they

98
00:05:12,440 --> 00:05:13,800
Speaker 1: have a lot of love for each other. No, I

99
00:05:13,839 --> 00:05:15,880
Speaker 1: don't know them. I don't know her, don't know him.

100
00:05:15,880 --> 00:05:18,279
Speaker 1: From Adam and Eve. But I can tell they share

101
00:05:18,320 --> 00:05:20,880
Speaker 1: a lot of love and a lot of similarities. However,

102
00:05:21,279 --> 00:05:23,599
Speaker 1: they're not on the same page, or she wouldn't have

103
00:05:23,640 --> 00:05:25,880
Speaker 1: said no. That does not mean she does not want

104
00:05:25,880 --> 00:05:28,799
Speaker 1: to be with him. She even cried, she shed a tear,

105
00:05:29,240 --> 00:05:31,200
Speaker 1: she did. But that is a woman who was sure

106
00:05:31,200 --> 00:05:33,400
Speaker 1: of herself that she's not ready to take that step

107
00:05:33,440 --> 00:05:36,920
Speaker 1: to get married. If I had more time, and if

108
00:05:36,960 --> 00:05:38,920
Speaker 1: I had known her, I would have asked her, well,

109
00:05:38,920 --> 00:05:41,320
Speaker 1: why did you say no? Is it because he's not

110
00:05:41,440 --> 00:05:43,480
Speaker 1: ready you you feel like he has more growing up

111
00:05:43,520 --> 00:05:45,360
Speaker 1: to do, or you guys are not on the same page.

112
00:05:45,640 --> 00:05:47,400
Speaker 1: Is there something that he just did? Is he just

113
00:05:47,480 --> 00:05:50,760
Speaker 1: proposing to make ship right because he just cheated? I

114
00:05:50,839 --> 00:05:52,960
Speaker 1: don't know, and I couldn't assume. But what I'm gonna

115
00:05:53,000 --> 00:05:56,599
Speaker 1: say is the level of attention that they were giving

116
00:05:56,600 --> 00:05:59,040
Speaker 1: each other, it doesn't lead me to believe that they

117
00:05:59,040 --> 00:06:01,520
Speaker 1: were over after that night. She just wasn't ready to

118
00:06:01,560 --> 00:06:03,720
Speaker 1: get married, or maybe she wasn't ready to marry him

119
00:06:03,720 --> 00:06:05,760
Speaker 1: because she didn't think he was ready. There could have

120
00:06:05,800 --> 00:06:09,240
Speaker 1: been so many reasons why she didn't say yes. Maybe

121
00:06:09,440 --> 00:06:11,120
Speaker 1: marriage is not in her future. A lot of people

122
00:06:11,120 --> 00:06:13,120
Speaker 1: feel like they don't need to be married. A lot

123
00:06:13,120 --> 00:06:17,600
Speaker 1: of people may feel like they don't need that contractual

124
00:06:17,640 --> 00:06:21,040
Speaker 1: agreement because marriage is a contract. Yes it is. It's

125
00:06:21,040 --> 00:06:24,880
Speaker 1: something very sacred and it's beyond contracts, but illegally it's

126
00:06:24,880 --> 00:06:27,080
Speaker 1: an agreement, and and you're buying it to a person,

127
00:06:27,560 --> 00:06:31,240
Speaker 1: and a lot of people feel that that's not necessary

128
00:06:31,320 --> 00:06:33,960
Speaker 1: to be together, you know what I'm saying. So she

129
00:06:33,960 --> 00:06:36,359
Speaker 1: could have thought that way, but she could be cheating.

130
00:06:36,440 --> 00:06:38,400
Speaker 1: Let's just say that she she just she couldn't know.

131
00:06:38,480 --> 00:06:40,839
Speaker 1: She ain't ship and didn't want to take this man's

132
00:06:40,960 --> 00:06:43,039
Speaker 1: hand in marriage because she still got some working on

133
00:06:43,120 --> 00:06:46,240
Speaker 1: herself to do. Also, it could be him. It could

134
00:06:46,279 --> 00:06:49,719
Speaker 1: be he is just not ready. Now, listen, it takes

135
00:06:49,720 --> 00:06:51,320
Speaker 1: a lot for a guy to get down on his

136
00:06:51,400 --> 00:06:53,719
Speaker 1: knee and propose. It really does. So I'm not gonna

137
00:06:53,720 --> 00:06:56,600
Speaker 1: say he wasn't ready. I can't say that maybe he's

138
00:06:56,640 --> 00:07:00,160
Speaker 1: not ready to her. There are so many factors. It's

139
00:07:00,360 --> 00:07:03,240
Speaker 1: so many. And when she shed that tear, she did

140
00:07:03,279 --> 00:07:05,520
Speaker 1: tell him that she was sorry, and she took his

141
00:07:05,600 --> 00:07:07,280
Speaker 1: hand and she told him to get up, you know,

142
00:07:07,440 --> 00:07:09,440
Speaker 1: pulled him up, and she kissed him and she hugged

143
00:07:09,480 --> 00:07:12,320
Speaker 1: him he was piste off as a motherfucker. Let me

144
00:07:12,360 --> 00:07:14,800
Speaker 1: tell you. He turned around when he saw me. He

145
00:07:14,880 --> 00:07:17,480
Speaker 1: was like, yo, like he looks so defeated, Like, please

146
00:07:17,520 --> 00:07:19,880
Speaker 1: don't post that. I'm like, I promise, sir, I will not.

147
00:07:20,520 --> 00:07:22,360
Speaker 1: I will not. But y'all look so good, and I

148
00:07:22,400 --> 00:07:26,040
Speaker 1: want to tell y'all, whatever y'all path is, y'all build

149
00:07:26,040 --> 00:07:29,040
Speaker 1: that ship together, keep it straight. Nobody can take her

150
00:07:29,080 --> 00:07:31,200
Speaker 1: away from you. I don't even know that. And can't

151
00:07:31,240 --> 00:07:34,080
Speaker 1: nobody take you away from her? I don't know you

152
00:07:34,120 --> 00:07:36,440
Speaker 1: know what I'm saying, But those are my positive words

153
00:07:36,480 --> 00:07:39,200
Speaker 1: to them, and they left. I don't even think he

154
00:07:39,240 --> 00:07:41,480
Speaker 1: paid the fucking bill. He was so embarrassed. I said, Si,

155
00:07:41,640 --> 00:07:43,840
Speaker 1: I should have paid it for him. But brings me

156
00:07:43,880 --> 00:07:47,360
Speaker 1: to my next question and the carefully reckless discussion. When

157
00:07:47,480 --> 00:07:50,840
Speaker 1: is the right time to ask someone to marry you?

158
00:07:50,880 --> 00:07:52,920
Speaker 1: When is the right time to propose? Now? I know

159
00:07:52,960 --> 00:07:54,320
Speaker 1: a lot of people go back and forth in their

160
00:07:54,320 --> 00:07:59,120
Speaker 1: minds or whatever. I don't think you should propose if

161
00:07:59,160 --> 00:08:02,640
Speaker 1: you've never heard your partner talk about marriage. Ever, some

162
00:08:02,680 --> 00:08:04,400
Speaker 1: people just don't have it in their future. Some people

163
00:08:04,400 --> 00:08:06,120
Speaker 1: are just not there yet. Some people just don't even

164
00:08:06,160 --> 00:08:08,520
Speaker 1: think of it. And this looks like a fairly young couple.

165
00:08:08,920 --> 00:08:11,040
Speaker 1: Not saying it's it's bad to get married young. In

166
00:08:11,080 --> 00:08:14,000
Speaker 1: some instances it very well is. But they looked younger

167
00:08:14,000 --> 00:08:15,640
Speaker 1: than me. I'm twenty nine, you know I'm and I'm

168
00:08:15,640 --> 00:08:17,920
Speaker 1: a hard twenty nine bitch. Sometimes I look thirty, sometimes

169
00:08:17,960 --> 00:08:21,480
Speaker 1: I look twenty two. Very seldomly do I look twenty two.

170
00:08:21,480 --> 00:08:24,680
Speaker 1: But so what they look like they were like, but

171
00:08:24,800 --> 00:08:29,680
Speaker 1: they carried themselves very very maturely. I don't think there's

172
00:08:30,120 --> 00:08:32,640
Speaker 1: ever like there's ever a right time. I just think

173
00:08:32,679 --> 00:08:34,480
Speaker 1: you just have to know there is going to be

174
00:08:34,520 --> 00:08:36,960
Speaker 1: a thought in your mind, something that comes over you

175
00:08:37,000 --> 00:08:39,480
Speaker 1: where you just know it's a feeling, you know what

176
00:08:39,520 --> 00:08:41,839
Speaker 1: I'm saying, It's like a static that goes through you.

177
00:08:41,920 --> 00:08:44,040
Speaker 1: Has to be it has to be. Nobody is just

178
00:08:44,080 --> 00:08:46,319
Speaker 1: going out buying rings and getting on their knees and

179
00:08:46,360 --> 00:08:50,640
Speaker 1: proposing to bitches. Nobody's just doing that. He loved that girl, period, right,

180
00:08:51,040 --> 00:08:53,840
Speaker 1: And if this has happened to you, taken to consideration

181
00:08:54,440 --> 00:08:58,440
Speaker 1: in real time, there are issues that won't allow someone

182
00:08:58,480 --> 00:09:02,000
Speaker 1: to say yes. But it does that mean a relationship

183
00:09:02,280 --> 00:09:05,920
Speaker 1: is over? No? No, And then listen, you have to understand,

184
00:09:05,920 --> 00:09:08,640
Speaker 1: a lot of people get married for the wrong reasons,

185
00:09:08,679 --> 00:09:10,559
Speaker 1: Like you know what I'm saying. Like I'm not saying everybody,

186
00:09:10,720 --> 00:09:12,840
Speaker 1: but some people do. Like and I spoke about this

187
00:09:13,000 --> 00:09:15,280
Speaker 1: briefly on another podcast episode, like I think it was

188
00:09:15,320 --> 00:09:17,439
Speaker 1: like the fourth or fifth episode. I said, you know,

189
00:09:17,840 --> 00:09:20,559
Speaker 1: people they get married for the look of it. You

190
00:09:20,600 --> 00:09:23,920
Speaker 1: know what I'm saying. They get married because it's tradition

191
00:09:24,280 --> 00:09:26,480
Speaker 1: or I just want to be a wife. People love

192
00:09:26,520 --> 00:09:28,560
Speaker 1: that label as a wife. You know what I'm saying

193
00:09:28,559 --> 00:09:33,080
Speaker 1: when you haven't even learned yourself as an individual, but

194
00:09:33,120 --> 00:09:35,920
Speaker 1: you're gonna jump into a marriage that could have been

195
00:09:36,200 --> 00:09:38,840
Speaker 1: that girl's preservation that could have been heard like you

196
00:09:38,880 --> 00:09:42,200
Speaker 1: know what, No, I don't even know myself. And when

197
00:09:42,200 --> 00:09:44,080
Speaker 1: I say that you don't know yourself, you have to

198
00:09:44,080 --> 00:09:46,440
Speaker 1: know yourself in and out before you are willing to

199
00:09:46,520 --> 00:09:49,800
Speaker 1: walk down the aisle and become one with someone else.

200
00:09:49,960 --> 00:09:52,280
Speaker 1: Because if you know yourself, you know what you won't take,

201
00:09:52,720 --> 00:09:54,439
Speaker 1: and then you have to know the other person because

202
00:09:54,480 --> 00:09:57,200
Speaker 1: you'll know what they won't take. It's a very very

203
00:09:57,240 --> 00:09:59,959
Speaker 1: big step. That's the biggest step in a relationship that

204
00:10:00,120 --> 00:10:04,360
Speaker 1: I say that people take blindly. Look at Erica and Safari.

205
00:10:04,760 --> 00:10:07,280
Speaker 1: I believe that they loved the hype. I believe she

206
00:10:07,400 --> 00:10:10,280
Speaker 1: loved the hype of being married. She's always wanted it.

207
00:10:10,559 --> 00:10:14,760
Speaker 1: She's beautiful. He is a beautiful guy too, very beautiful personality,

208
00:10:14,880 --> 00:10:17,440
Speaker 1: what have you. You know what I'm saying. But they

209
00:10:17,559 --> 00:10:20,840
Speaker 1: hate each other now they have two children, or that's

210
00:10:20,960 --> 00:10:22,839
Speaker 1: at least what they want us to believe. Whether it's

211
00:10:22,840 --> 00:10:25,000
Speaker 1: fake or not, because you never know what's real anymore,

212
00:10:25,360 --> 00:10:30,240
Speaker 1: but they can't stand each other on the show online

213
00:10:30,360 --> 00:10:33,080
Speaker 1: and I don't know, I don't know what happens behind

214
00:10:33,080 --> 00:10:35,000
Speaker 1: closed doors, but what they show us is they can't

215
00:10:35,000 --> 00:10:38,679
Speaker 1: stand each other. Two nights ago, Eric ameniz As was

216
00:10:38,720 --> 00:10:43,559
Speaker 1: with fucking Natalie None at a fucking lounge talking about

217
00:10:43,600 --> 00:10:46,520
Speaker 1: I'm saying, oh, throwing middle fingers up, whatever whatever, you

218
00:10:46,640 --> 00:10:49,600
Speaker 1: still got two kids with this man, goofy, You still

219
00:10:49,640 --> 00:10:51,880
Speaker 1: got two kids with this man. You can live? Yes,

220
00:10:51,920 --> 00:10:53,720
Speaker 1: you can, you can live. Because that they were in

221
00:10:53,720 --> 00:10:56,040
Speaker 1: the comments like, oh, she's speaking from a hurt place,

222
00:10:56,240 --> 00:10:58,280
Speaker 1: and she gets upset when we tell her the truth.

223
00:10:58,600 --> 00:11:01,040
Speaker 1: I think the only time she's she's ever accepted the

224
00:11:01,040 --> 00:11:04,360
Speaker 1: truth was from Wendy Williams. But we she hates that

225
00:11:04,520 --> 00:11:08,040
Speaker 1: and I love Erica, I do, but I just feel

226
00:11:08,080 --> 00:11:11,840
Speaker 1: like she's trying so hard to show him that she

227
00:11:11,960 --> 00:11:16,800
Speaker 1: can move on to that it's reflecting on her poorly,

228
00:11:17,880 --> 00:11:19,920
Speaker 1: very poorly. She's going through it and we know this,

229
00:11:20,480 --> 00:11:23,240
Speaker 1: we know it. But baby, you're gonna be okay. You

230
00:11:23,240 --> 00:11:25,280
Speaker 1: don't need to do all of that, you know what

231
00:11:25,320 --> 00:11:29,040
Speaker 1: I'm saying. And she probably like, bitch minjo business I whatever, Bitch, No,

232
00:11:29,240 --> 00:11:31,000
Speaker 1: you put it out there, so it's my business now,

233
00:11:31,360 --> 00:11:33,079
Speaker 1: you know what I'm saying. But you don't want to

234
00:11:33,200 --> 00:11:36,840
Speaker 1: end up like that. So at times you can't just

235
00:11:36,880 --> 00:11:41,440
Speaker 1: say yes, and when everything doesn't properly align, you don't

236
00:11:41,480 --> 00:11:45,000
Speaker 1: just say yes. Now, should she have done it differently

237
00:11:45,600 --> 00:11:47,800
Speaker 1: with you know what I'm saying to you save him

238
00:11:47,920 --> 00:11:50,120
Speaker 1: the embarrassment, you know what I'm saying, because that could

239
00:11:50,200 --> 00:11:52,520
Speaker 1: scar him from ever doing that ship again if they

240
00:11:52,559 --> 00:11:54,200
Speaker 1: do make it, which I think they will, you know

241
00:11:54,200 --> 00:11:56,439
Speaker 1: what I'm saying, because they walked out holding hands still,

242
00:11:56,480 --> 00:11:59,000
Speaker 1: you know, even though she led, he was very embarrassed,

243
00:11:59,760 --> 00:12:03,040
Speaker 1: like a scream for him. But do you think she

244
00:12:03,040 --> 00:12:05,240
Speaker 1: should have said yes in the restaurant and then got

245
00:12:05,240 --> 00:12:07,600
Speaker 1: in the car or got at home, like look, babe,

246
00:12:07,960 --> 00:12:10,480
Speaker 1: I said yes, but I don't want to do it,

247
00:12:11,040 --> 00:12:12,440
Speaker 1: you know, because a lot of people say yes to

248
00:12:12,480 --> 00:12:15,319
Speaker 1: spare the God's feelings. You know a lot of people

249
00:12:15,400 --> 00:12:18,520
Speaker 1: do that. Now, how would I have done it? I

250
00:12:18,520 --> 00:12:20,680
Speaker 1: would have done it the same way depending on where

251
00:12:20,720 --> 00:12:23,240
Speaker 1: we were. Now, if we were around like his family

252
00:12:23,840 --> 00:12:26,520
Speaker 1: or like my family, or you know, at a party

253
00:12:26,679 --> 00:12:29,120
Speaker 1: where you know, he he invited people that I know

254
00:12:29,200 --> 00:12:31,920
Speaker 1: and all that ship, I would have definitely told him

255
00:12:31,960 --> 00:12:35,360
Speaker 1: no in front of them, just to save all the hype,

256
00:12:35,679 --> 00:12:38,679
Speaker 1: just to save everybody's hopes getting up and ship, you

257
00:12:38,720 --> 00:12:41,520
Speaker 1: know what I mean. Like, I definitely don't want to

258
00:12:41,559 --> 00:12:44,120
Speaker 1: be the barrier of bad news, but I definitely don't

259
00:12:44,160 --> 00:12:46,920
Speaker 1: want to say yes just to be nice. And people

260
00:12:46,920 --> 00:12:49,520
Speaker 1: are taking pictures. I told you we were recording that couple.

261
00:12:49,720 --> 00:12:53,000
Speaker 1: If somebody records me, it's going up anyway. It's me ship,

262
00:12:53,040 --> 00:12:55,760
Speaker 1: Why the funk Whitney record? And they're gonna be posting

263
00:12:56,040 --> 00:12:58,120
Speaker 1: and I say no, that's gonna be the first thing

264
00:12:58,120 --> 00:13:00,719
Speaker 1: on all the blogs. That is not what I want

265
00:13:00,720 --> 00:13:02,959
Speaker 1: to do. I would never want to embarrass my partner,

266
00:13:03,280 --> 00:13:06,400
Speaker 1: my boyfriend, my my man. I would never want to

267
00:13:06,440 --> 00:13:09,320
Speaker 1: embarrass him like that. So I would definitely say, Babe,

268
00:13:09,920 --> 00:13:12,160
Speaker 1: not yet, not yet or not yet not even no,

269
00:13:12,360 --> 00:13:14,440
Speaker 1: just not yet. Even if I don't plan to ever

270
00:13:14,520 --> 00:13:17,680
Speaker 1: marry him, I'm gonna say not yet. That's still saving

271
00:13:17,720 --> 00:13:20,520
Speaker 1: his feelings. But being as honest as you can without

272
00:13:20,559 --> 00:13:23,960
Speaker 1: being disrespectful or being you know, being mean about it

273
00:13:24,080 --> 00:13:26,079
Speaker 1: or coming off mean. You can come off very mean

274
00:13:26,520 --> 00:13:29,760
Speaker 1: and not even be aware of that. You understand. So

275
00:13:29,840 --> 00:13:32,640
Speaker 1: if this has ever ever happened to you, make sure

276
00:13:32,640 --> 00:13:34,240
Speaker 1: you hit me up in the d M or the

277
00:13:34,360 --> 00:13:36,600
Speaker 1: email and tell me about the time. Because I want

278
00:13:36,600 --> 00:13:38,600
Speaker 1: to help people do this ship. There's no just fix

279
00:13:38,640 --> 00:13:40,840
Speaker 1: my mess today. I want to help you all privately.

280
00:13:41,080 --> 00:13:43,240
Speaker 1: I don't want to try to help you all on

281
00:13:43,320 --> 00:13:44,880
Speaker 1: the podcast. You know what I'm saying. Y'all think I

282
00:13:44,920 --> 00:13:46,880
Speaker 1: make fun of everything, and I do, but I will

283
00:13:47,160 --> 00:13:51,080
Speaker 1: gladly help. Like, do not leave somebody just because they

284
00:13:51,120 --> 00:13:54,080
Speaker 1: said no to your proposal. It could be so many reasons.

285
00:13:54,280 --> 00:13:56,520
Speaker 1: Now listen, second thing that happened to me this week?

286
00:13:56,960 --> 00:13:58,880
Speaker 1: Hold up, Hold up, I know the ship getting good,

287
00:13:58,880 --> 00:14:01,200
Speaker 1: but listen to just the couple seconds of a commercial.

288
00:14:01,240 --> 00:14:06,160
Speaker 1: If you love me, you'll listen. I'm dating I'm dating

289
00:14:06,160 --> 00:14:08,959
Speaker 1: this guy. He's the only one I'm dating at this point.

290
00:14:09,160 --> 00:14:11,439
Speaker 1: It's still in the end, the beginning stages, you know,

291
00:14:11,720 --> 00:14:15,400
Speaker 1: and you know, we're months in and I kind of

292
00:14:15,480 --> 00:14:19,240
Speaker 1: irritated him a little bit just with my selfishness. And

293
00:14:19,320 --> 00:14:22,560
Speaker 1: sometimes you don't know that you're being selfish. Right, So

294
00:14:23,240 --> 00:14:25,160
Speaker 1: he has this thing going on. I have my thing

295
00:14:25,200 --> 00:14:28,280
Speaker 1: going on. Right. He's forever supporting me. He knows my

296
00:14:28,360 --> 00:14:31,400
Speaker 1: schedule before I even tell him, Like he knows where

297
00:14:31,400 --> 00:14:34,160
Speaker 1: I'm going before I even tell him, because he's involved.

298
00:14:34,240 --> 00:14:38,840
Speaker 1: He is very hands on with me. He pays attention

299
00:14:38,880 --> 00:14:43,600
Speaker 1: to everything. He is a very attentive guy to me,

300
00:14:44,040 --> 00:14:47,760
Speaker 1: and I love it. However, it's not that way vice versa.

301
00:14:47,920 --> 00:14:50,520
Speaker 1: You know what I'm saying. And I was just out

302
00:14:50,560 --> 00:14:53,440
Speaker 1: of town recently. I had to shoot a movie in Houston,

303
00:14:53,480 --> 00:14:58,480
Speaker 1: produced by Jamie Fox and the Torry Turner. Congratulations to me, y'all, y'all, huh,

304
00:14:58,480 --> 00:15:01,400
Speaker 1: give me the applause, y'all. M much more coming to

305
00:15:01,480 --> 00:15:06,360
Speaker 1: the screen now. I was on set all night, thirteen

306
00:15:06,480 --> 00:15:10,240
Speaker 1: fourteen hours. Right back here at home, he had an event. Now,

307
00:15:10,280 --> 00:15:13,080
Speaker 1: he's an event planner. He that's what he does. So

308
00:15:13,560 --> 00:15:16,280
Speaker 1: I text him like eleven o'clock and they like, hey,

309
00:15:16,320 --> 00:15:18,600
Speaker 1: are you home, just to see because I hadn't heard

310
00:15:18,640 --> 00:15:21,440
Speaker 1: from him, you know, in a couple of hours. I'm like, okay, hey,

311
00:15:21,560 --> 00:15:23,400
Speaker 1: you're home. You're good because he had checked on me.

312
00:15:23,680 --> 00:15:26,120
Speaker 1: And then I noticed that he stopped texting me. So

313
00:15:26,160 --> 00:15:29,160
Speaker 1: I'm like, hey, you home, like you sleep? What's up?

314
00:15:29,160 --> 00:15:30,960
Speaker 1: You know what I'm saying, keeping tabs, because that's just

315
00:15:31,000 --> 00:15:33,120
Speaker 1: what you do. You keep tabs on your man when

316
00:15:33,160 --> 00:15:36,120
Speaker 1: you know when you do that. He faced tim to

317
00:15:36,160 --> 00:15:40,000
Speaker 1: me two hours later and he's like, you didn't know

318
00:15:40,480 --> 00:15:43,440
Speaker 1: where I was? And I was like, no, I thought

319
00:15:43,440 --> 00:15:45,520
Speaker 1: you were home. He was like, I had such and

320
00:15:45,560 --> 00:15:48,680
Speaker 1: such to do. I had this. How did you not

321
00:15:48,800 --> 00:15:53,120
Speaker 1: know that? And I was like I didn't know babies,

322
00:15:53,160 --> 00:15:55,640
Speaker 1: Like how could you not know? Like it's like I'm

323
00:15:55,680 --> 00:15:57,800
Speaker 1: in your world. I'm only in your world. You have

324
00:15:57,840 --> 00:15:59,680
Speaker 1: no regard for what I do. It's like you don't

325
00:15:59,720 --> 00:16:04,400
Speaker 1: care about what I'm doing. But I always care about

326
00:16:04,440 --> 00:16:06,520
Speaker 1: what you do. I always ask you, oh, how is

327
00:16:06,560 --> 00:16:08,920
Speaker 1: your show? I always tell you before you show, you

328
00:16:09,000 --> 00:16:10,800
Speaker 1: better go kill it. I know where you're gonna be,

329
00:16:10,920 --> 00:16:14,200
Speaker 1: I know what's going on, which your schedule. I know

330
00:16:15,160 --> 00:16:18,640
Speaker 1: everything about your schedule and what you do, but you

331
00:16:19,400 --> 00:16:22,920
Speaker 1: don't know shit. You can't keep up with nothing that

332
00:16:22,960 --> 00:16:24,960
Speaker 1: I do, and it's like you don't care, you have

333
00:16:25,120 --> 00:16:28,440
Speaker 1: no fucking regard. And I was like, for a second,

334
00:16:28,480 --> 00:16:31,040
Speaker 1: who the funk you talking to? But then I had

335
00:16:31,080 --> 00:16:34,880
Speaker 1: to realize, I'm like, this is very, very true, and

336
00:16:34,960 --> 00:16:36,560
Speaker 1: sometimes you have to take a step back and you

337
00:16:36,680 --> 00:16:38,560
Speaker 1: look and you have to see how selfish you are.

338
00:16:38,800 --> 00:16:42,080
Speaker 1: I'm so spoiled, And yes, I can be very selfish.

339
00:16:42,200 --> 00:16:45,320
Speaker 1: I'm a very very good person, sweetheart. But one thing

340
00:16:45,360 --> 00:16:47,560
Speaker 1: I do, I do notice, and he brought it to

341
00:16:47,600 --> 00:16:49,760
Speaker 1: my attention. I go to extra mouth for you. You

342
00:16:49,800 --> 00:16:52,760
Speaker 1: don't do that for me. I'm in your world, so

343
00:16:52,880 --> 00:16:54,920
Speaker 1: you have to kind of collide worlds. You have to

344
00:16:55,000 --> 00:16:57,360
Speaker 1: kind of like, look at it is give and take

345
00:16:57,400 --> 00:16:59,840
Speaker 1: in fifty fifty I want How am I gonna expect

346
00:16:59,840 --> 00:17:02,400
Speaker 1: this man to love and support everything I do when

347
00:17:02,520 --> 00:17:04,760
Speaker 1: I don't even take the time too and it can

348
00:17:04,800 --> 00:17:08,000
Speaker 1: literally take me ten seconds to learn his schedule or

349
00:17:08,000 --> 00:17:10,920
Speaker 1: to you know, he he does this ship all the time.

350
00:17:11,000 --> 00:17:13,280
Speaker 1: So it's like, y'all, I should know this stuff. You

351
00:17:13,320 --> 00:17:15,679
Speaker 1: know what I'm saying, Especially if you're seriously dating somebody. Now,

352
00:17:15,720 --> 00:17:17,920
Speaker 1: if you're not funk, would they do? You know what

353
00:17:17,960 --> 00:17:19,399
Speaker 1: I'm saying, if you're just getting a dick and you

354
00:17:19,480 --> 00:17:23,040
Speaker 1: just you know by bone real quick and yeah, but

355
00:17:23,400 --> 00:17:27,280
Speaker 1: serious dating, Yes, you have to be just as attentive

356
00:17:27,680 --> 00:17:29,800
Speaker 1: to your partner as you want him to be to you.

357
00:17:29,960 --> 00:17:32,160
Speaker 1: And that goes for the guys as well. And after

358
00:17:32,200 --> 00:17:35,280
Speaker 1: that conversation we were able to move on. He didn't

359
00:17:35,320 --> 00:17:37,400
Speaker 1: hold the grudge. He even said a little joke because

360
00:17:37,400 --> 00:17:39,320
Speaker 1: I was in the chair getting my makeup done before

361
00:17:39,359 --> 00:17:42,080
Speaker 1: I actually went to film on said film my scene.

362
00:17:42,320 --> 00:17:45,280
Speaker 1: He's very understanding. So that brings me back to the

363
00:17:45,359 --> 00:17:50,080
Speaker 1: first topic. Marriage. Don't relate it to me right now. Yes,

364
00:17:50,160 --> 00:17:51,800
Speaker 1: I want to get married, but that's not in my

365
00:17:51,840 --> 00:17:54,080
Speaker 1: plans right now. Listen, right now, I'm just dating, so

366
00:17:54,240 --> 00:17:57,080
Speaker 1: shut up. You have to know someone inside and out.

367
00:17:57,200 --> 00:17:59,679
Speaker 1: You have to learn how to be selfless. You have

368
00:17:59,720 --> 00:18:03,160
Speaker 1: to make a lot of sacrifices and compromise to get

369
00:18:03,200 --> 00:18:06,240
Speaker 1: to that point where you say yes wholeheartedly when you're

370
00:18:06,280 --> 00:18:09,439
Speaker 1: being proposed to. That goes for men and women. And

371
00:18:09,480 --> 00:18:11,680
Speaker 1: I want y'all to take that with y'all. If y'all

372
00:18:11,680 --> 00:18:14,320
Speaker 1: didn't take anything else, you have to be mindful of

373
00:18:14,400 --> 00:18:18,359
Speaker 1: the partner of who you are with, because if you

374
00:18:18,440 --> 00:18:20,520
Speaker 1: jump into it, you're gonna jump right out of it.

375
00:18:20,640 --> 00:18:23,359
Speaker 1: You're gonna wish you never did. And nobody wants to

376
00:18:23,560 --> 00:18:26,760
Speaker 1: get married just to get divorced. So it doesn't mean

377
00:18:26,800 --> 00:18:29,479
Speaker 1: it's over if she says no, and it doesn't mean

378
00:18:29,520 --> 00:18:32,200
Speaker 1: it's over if he says no. I love you, guys,

379
00:18:32,280 --> 00:18:35,080
Speaker 1: because I know y'all love me. Tune in next Wednesday,

380
00:18:35,320 --> 00:18:54,080
Speaker 1: every hump Day, and then my deepest paying voice. Carefully

381
00:18:54,119 --> 00:18:56,679
Speaker 1: Reckless is a production of Our Heart Radio and The

382
00:18:56,760 --> 00:18:59,920
Speaker 1: Black Effect. For more podcasts from Our Heart Radio, visit

383
00:19:00,040 --> 00:19:03,399
Speaker 1: the I Heart Radio app, Apple podcast, or wherever you

384
00:19:03,480 --> 00:19:04,600
Speaker 1: listen to your favorite shows.