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Speaker 1: I have a little thing I told around. I keep

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Speaker 1: my federal prison I d and I keep my indictment papers.

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Speaker 1: Not a rat never will be, so they respect it.

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Speaker 1: We're not the police. We're here to stop you and

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Speaker 1: help you change, turn your life around, and do something different.

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Speaker 2: Welcome to an army of normal folks. I'm Bill Courtney.

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Speaker 2: I'm a normal guy. I'm a husband, I'm a father,

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Speaker 2: I'm an entrepreneur, and I've been a football coach an

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Speaker 2: inner city Memphis and the last part it somehow led

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Speaker 2: to an oscar for the film about our team. That

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Speaker 2: movie is called Undefeated. I believe our country's problems will

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Speaker 2: never be solved by a bunch of fancy people in

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Speaker 2: nice suits talking big words that nobody understands on seeing

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Speaker 2: it in Fox, but rather by an army of normal folks.

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Speaker 2: That's us, just you and me deciding hey, maybe I

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Speaker 2: can help. That's what Florence flow Brooks and Rinardo Baker

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Speaker 2: have done. They were both living the gang life in

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Speaker 2: Memphis until they just couldn't do it anymore, and they

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Speaker 2: transformed their lives and now, through a great initiative called

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Speaker 2: Memphis Allies, they're committed to helping other vulnerable citizens avoid

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Speaker 2: the same fate and lead flourishing lives. I cannot wait

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Speaker 2: for you to meet Flow in Rinardo right after these

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Speaker 2: brief messages from our general sponsors Florence Brooks, Flow and

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Speaker 2: Ronardo Baker Nardo. What's up?

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Speaker 3: Welcome, welcome, well, thank you for the honor to be here.

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Speaker 2: It's an honor to have you. So we're going to

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Speaker 2: talk about a great thing going on run in my

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Speaker 2: hometown called Memphisileize, which you guys are you know you are,

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Speaker 2: you are what it's about, and you know I want

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Speaker 2: I want to kind of jump ahead almost and tell

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Speaker 2: our listeners what Memphisilized is and then unfold the importance

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Speaker 2: of folks like you that actually make it work. So

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Speaker 2: why don't you take it first? Flow? What is memphisille.

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Speaker 1: Memphisileized is a community intervention to reduce gun violence in

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Speaker 1: our communities.

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Speaker 3: We are definitely growing.

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Speaker 1: We have a Fraser and Raleigh area site, we have

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Speaker 1: Orange Mound, recently Reheal and soon South Memphis. It is

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Speaker 1: a gun gun violence prevention program where we are targeting

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Speaker 1: the highest risk individuals in our communities that will either

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Speaker 1: commit gun violence. It's been a victim of gun violence,

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Speaker 1: just trying to stop the violence. It is our goal

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Speaker 1: to reach our young people, and sad to say they're

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Speaker 1: getting younger and younger. Our mind projected with the age

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Speaker 1: bracket is seventeen to thirty five. However, we do have

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Speaker 1: intervenure for our younger youth with our SWITCH Youth Department.

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Speaker 1: They deal with the younger kids. It is my goal

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Speaker 1: for us to expand over to the younger generation as well,

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Speaker 1: because I feel like our outreach team and foot soldiers

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Speaker 1: for the adult side, they just get down into the

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Speaker 1: grind of what's really going on in our community.

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Speaker 2: You know, first of all, and I mean, we're out

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Speaker 2: the gate, but my goodness, talking about having to get

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Speaker 2: into a community of people under seventeen to stop gun

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Speaker 2: violence in and of itself is a disgusting notion that

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Speaker 2: we have to do that. Not that we don't, but

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Speaker 2: the fact that we're talking about twelve, thirteen, fourteen year

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Speaker 2: olds engaging in gun violence, to me, that says so

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Speaker 2: much about a part of our society that is just lost.

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Speaker 2: And it's one of the reasons why I think Memphis

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Speaker 2: Allies is amazing. And that's a good summary, and I

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Speaker 2: want everybody listening to us to understand that's what it is.

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Speaker 2: It's about getting to the most at risk people for

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Speaker 2: gun violence and trying to curtell the violence before it happens. Also,

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Speaker 2: when people hear Hickory Hill, Orange Mound, I think you

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Speaker 2: said Fraser, Raleigh, and South Memphis. For those of you

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Speaker 2: not from this area, those are our Compton and Watts,

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Speaker 2: Those are our gang ridden neighborhood. Those are our largely

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Speaker 2: predominantly black and brown neighborhoods who are largely also surrounded

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Speaker 2: with blight and poverty. And unfortunately, all of the taglines

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Speaker 2: that seem to be grouped up together when you talk

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Speaker 2: about gun violence. Man, I can't help but call you Nardo.

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Speaker 2: I know your name's a Nardo, but on the street

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Speaker 2: you're known as Nardo. The kids know you as Nardo.

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Speaker 3: Pick up.

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Speaker 2: We're flow left off just a little bit on that

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Speaker 2: under seventeen thing, because under seventeen years of age and

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Speaker 2: gun violence, those two things should never be mentioned in

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Speaker 2: the same sentence. Yet, it's an unfortunate reality. And not

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Speaker 2: just Memphis, but many and most of our large urban

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Speaker 2: areas talk about that. Talk about what you're seeing and

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Speaker 2: what you're doing, what you're trying to do well. From

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Speaker 2: what I'm seeing is a lot to number of young people.

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Speaker 2: And we ain't just talk about males. We talking about females.

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Speaker 4: Also, there's a venturing off into a lifestyle that consist

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Speaker 4: of them making money. But at the same time they're

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Speaker 4: hurting people to make this money. And so the key

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Speaker 4: thing is what's the driving force for them to seek

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Speaker 4: resources in the way that they're seeking it. And you

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Speaker 4: can think, we can we can talk about jobs, we

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Speaker 4: can talk about all that, but at the end of

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Speaker 4: the day, we have a hip hop culture that that

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Speaker 4: signifies that you need to give your money, you need

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Speaker 4: to make money. And yeah, some ways it's illegal, in

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Speaker 4: some ways are legal, but at the same time, violence

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Speaker 4: is pushing in both directions. It don't matter if you're

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Speaker 4: doing it right or if you're doing it wrong. And

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Speaker 4: so when we get to talking about teenagers, they feel

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Speaker 4: like they need to drive a car, they need to

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Speaker 4: wear designer clothes, or they need to have this jewelry

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Speaker 4: on and all these type of things. When you set

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Speaker 4: the prices on there and they look at it and

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Speaker 4: they like, how I'm auch forward this, there's really minimum

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Speaker 4: wage is a picture that can be set before them

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Speaker 4: and say, I will be able to do this, or

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Speaker 4: the teenager probably ain't even got a parent at home

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Speaker 4: and grandma too old to keep up with them, so

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Speaker 4: now they got defend for their own. They connect with

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Speaker 4: other young people that fit that same criteria. They say,

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Speaker 4: we got we're gonna, we're gonna live by all means necessary.

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Speaker 4: We gotta get somebody, we gotta get closed on that baby.

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Speaker 4: We gotta put a roof on my head, all right,

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Speaker 4: And so that culture exists and Memphis Ourized goal is

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Speaker 4: even in the culture of under seventeen, is to reach

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Speaker 4: them to introdict before.

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Speaker 2: They go using those guns exactly, all right, So everybody listen,

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Speaker 2: we're gonna come back to that so we understand exactly

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Speaker 2: how they're doing it, because that sounds great. But the

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Speaker 2: how is the secret sauce, right, so and we'll get

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Speaker 2: to that, but I think it's important to understand before

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Speaker 2: you get to the how is the who is Who's

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Speaker 2: doing this? And it's y'all. And I think there's eighty

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Speaker 2: people inside Memphis Allies now or so. But that's what

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Speaker 2: I think is so interesting about what Youth Villages has

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Speaker 2: done in starting this Memphis Allies thing. And why this

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Speaker 2: is scalable. This could be done in Baltimore, Chicago and

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Speaker 2: every other city. And you know, as I as I

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Speaker 2: read your stories, I thought about my time working in

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Speaker 2: the inner city, and we're just going to be real.

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Speaker 2: I'm a white dude. I'm a white dude who has

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Speaker 2: a business. And although I did not come up that way,

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Speaker 2: and I came up without much of nothing, the fact

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Speaker 2: is I'm a white dude with a business, living in

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Speaker 2: the suburbs, a nice house, with wife and four kids.

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Speaker 2: And one of my biggest struggles working an inner city

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Speaker 2: was credibility to sit down with a black sixteen year

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Speaker 2: old kid from Smoky City and for him to try

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Speaker 2: to relate with me and feel me and candidly me

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Speaker 2: feel him. Regardless of how consistent I was and how

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Speaker 2: hard I wanted to work and how genuinely authentic my

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Speaker 2: attempts were, it wasn't until my third and fourth year

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Speaker 2: that people started to actually trust that I was the

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Speaker 2: real And I didn't show up with credibility. I had

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Speaker 2: to earn it. And although I was never going to

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Speaker 2: get the street crowd, I could at least get the

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Speaker 2: credibility that I was for real and consistent everything else,

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Speaker 2: and that's when things started. But it did. It took

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Speaker 2: three or four years for kids really wanted to buy

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Speaker 2: into what I was talking. And Memphis Allies, I think

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Speaker 2: has a really poignant approach, which is, don't put people

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Speaker 2: like me out there. On the face of it, put

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Speaker 2: people who have lived the experience of the very people

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Speaker 2: you're trying to reach flow. Tell me about your experience,

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Speaker 2: tell me about how you came up.

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Speaker 1: That's definitely one of the key things being able to

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Speaker 1: relate to the people that we reach out to. I

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Speaker 1: can honestly say, and I love sharing my story with

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Speaker 1: them because I want them to know I am genuine,

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Speaker 1: I'm an open book. Definitely was what you considered a

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Speaker 1: participant who we served coming up in the Memphis area,

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Speaker 1: North Memphis and South Memphis. I was a member of

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Speaker 1: Against Disciples, so I helped turn down the same neighborhood

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Speaker 1: I fight so hard for today to say. So when

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Speaker 1: you're talking and meeting these individuals you're meeting and where

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Speaker 1: they're at per se, but in my mind, I'm trying

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Speaker 1: to meet you to where you need to be. So

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Speaker 1: I'm showing you that I did the same thing you did.

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Speaker 1: I'm not better than you, and I'm not judging, but

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Speaker 1: there's a better way.

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Speaker 2: How'd you grow up? Where'd you grow up?

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Speaker 3: North Memphis? Predominantly you grew up North Memphis.

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Speaker 2: Where's New Chicago or Smith City Hollywood. That ain't really north,

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Speaker 2: that's kind of Northeast Memphis. North Memphis is Smoky City

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Speaker 2: Green Fall, New Chicago. I bet you did. Yeah, I

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Speaker 2: know how many white folks you ever talked to? Actually

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Speaker 2: know all that? I know? Well, I worked at for

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Speaker 2: seven years, so I know it, So I know you.

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Speaker 2: So North Hollywood for those again not from this area,

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Speaker 2: New Chicago, Smoke City Green Law is like just north

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Speaker 2: of downtown a couple of miles, and then if you

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Speaker 2: go east a little bit, you get into the Douglas

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Speaker 2: Hollywood area, and that's what Flow's talking about. But it

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Speaker 2: is all still the hood, yes it is.

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Speaker 1: So you grew up Most of my childhood split between Chicago, Illinois,

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Speaker 1: the West side of Chicago. My dad was originally from Chicago.

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Speaker 1: My mom is originally from Memphis. How to too met

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Speaker 1: I'm still unsure and I'm fifty one now. Because she

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Speaker 1: was a Baptist preacher's daughter and he was the head

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Speaker 1: governor for GDS on the West side of Chicago.

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Speaker 2: Okay, see I've read that. Now let's just this one

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Speaker 2: of those squirrels I got to trace up a tree.

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Speaker 2: Now you've got a Baptist preacher's daughter looking up with

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Speaker 2: not a gang member, but the governor, the governor of

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Speaker 2: the disciples and the gd governors like high rank, high ranking,

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Speaker 2: and to be high ranking, they just don't have a

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Speaker 2: vote because you're the guy with the biggest smile. You

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Speaker 2: earned that. So I mean, I ain't talking about your business,

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Speaker 2: but your died was.

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Speaker 1: Most definitely was one of the one of the driving

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Speaker 1: forces of my rough side because I was the only

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Speaker 1: girl with eleven brothers. So it was my desire to

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Speaker 1: be exactly like my daddy and brothers.

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Speaker 2: So you split time between Memphis and Chicago. So what

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Speaker 2: was not like what was formative?

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Speaker 1: It was crazy because when I come to Memphis, I

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Speaker 1: have to downplay who I am when I'm in Chicago

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Speaker 1: because my mom was not going for the street life,

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Speaker 1: and it was a battle. So I didn't have the

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Speaker 1: I would say, I didn't have the power to tell

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Speaker 1: her that I preferred to stay with my dad because

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Speaker 1: I could do what I want to do live this wildlife,

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Speaker 1: and everybody was getting me, so I thought that was cool.

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Speaker 1: But at home she was giving me the planning to seed.

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Speaker 1: So there's a different way, different way of doing things,

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Speaker 1: different way of life. It wasn't until I was molested

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Speaker 1: by my uncle that my mom put a stop to

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Speaker 1: me going to Chicago altogether. I was seven when it started,

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Speaker 1: and I was a little under thirteen weeks when I

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Speaker 1: finally was able to express what was going on. He

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Speaker 1: didn't know until I told my mom, and when she

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Speaker 1: found out, all hell broke per second, and I was

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Speaker 1: not allowed to go back to Chicago because that was

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Speaker 1: his brother. Unfortunately, it cost my dad and my uncle

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Speaker 1: to get into a physical altercation where my uncle my

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Speaker 1: dad killed my mom, and he went to prison for me.

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Speaker 1: So I was angry, but get still confused as to

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Speaker 1: why she was keeping you away from my dad because

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Speaker 1: he was not the one who did it. But as

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Speaker 1: I got older, I understood it was just a whole

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Speaker 1: atmosphere of the He wasn't able to sit there and

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Speaker 1: raise us because he was running the streets and he

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Speaker 1: was raising everybody else's kids in the streets because he

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Speaker 1: was high.

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Speaker 3: Right, So.

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Speaker 2: And now a few messages from our generous sponsors, But first,

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Speaker 2: please consider signing up to join the Army at normalfolks

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00:15:34,440 --> 00:15:38,520
Speaker 2: dot us. By signing up, you'll receive a weekly email

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Speaker 2: with updates about the Army and short episode summaries in

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Speaker 2: case you happen to miss an episode or you prefer

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Speaker 2: reading about our incredible guests. Please sign up. The more numbers,

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Speaker 2: the more impact we'll be right back. The vast majority

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Speaker 2: of people listening to us right now certainly watch the

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Speaker 2: news and read the newspapers, and gangs and gang activity

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Speaker 2: and all of it is so, you know, heavily reported

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Speaker 2: on movies, music, and it is in one sense sensationalized,

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Speaker 2: and in another sense it is so often reported on

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Speaker 2: and sensationalized. I mean, how many times we turn on

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Speaker 2: the news and see another gangland shooting and all that.

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Speaker 2: And I think part of the problem to all that

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Speaker 2: is is that people think they know what gang life

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Speaker 2: is because they've seen it on TV or a movie.

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Speaker 2: As a seven to thirteen year old child growing up,

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Speaker 2: the time you spent in Chicago with a father who's

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Speaker 2: a leader of the GDS, and I want you to

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Speaker 2: be as real with me as you can. You know,

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Speaker 2: my assumption is that's drug dealing, that's banging fighting in

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Speaker 2: the streets, that's guns, that's prostitution, that's racketeering, that's fraud

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Speaker 2: with bank fraud and check writing, and it's it's an

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Speaker 2: illustration to a child of a way to live, not

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Speaker 2: a right way to live, but a way to live.

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Speaker 2: And so tell me from a child's perspective what that

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Speaker 2: is to grow up in that.

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Speaker 3: One.

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Speaker 1: I thought it was all right because a child our

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Speaker 1: loves their parents. So if a parent is the leading

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Speaker 1: force of what you're learning, nobody could tell me that

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Speaker 1: way life was not the correct way of life. And

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Speaker 1: everything you just say is exactly true. All that came

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Speaker 1: with living their life. So carjacking for no apparent reason.

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Speaker 1: But in my mindset as a child, that's the right

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Speaker 1: way to live because my daddy said.

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Speaker 3: So that's what.

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Speaker 1: Dad showed me. That was I was exposed to. That's

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Speaker 1: the way my mind was prepped. So I was confused

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Speaker 1: when I got to self and my mom saying one thing,

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Speaker 1: but when I'm with my dad, it's another way of living.

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Speaker 2: Can I say something to you that I don't want

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Speaker 2: you to take the wrong way? I think it's abuse

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Speaker 2: I think it's abuse. I think I think it's literally

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Speaker 2: child abuse. You went to school, right, yes, I know

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Speaker 2: you had teachers and principles and people around you saying

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Speaker 2: that ain't right. So where's the disconnect? I don't, I

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Speaker 2: truly don't understand. What you said was poignant. My daddy

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Speaker 2: says it's the right thing to do. It's the right

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Speaker 2: thing to do. Y'all know, Melvin Cole Pure Academy, Melvin,

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Speaker 2: what did I say, Melvin call right? Yeah, Pure Academy.

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Speaker 2: All right? Well, Pure Academy is a school he started

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Speaker 2: here in Memphis reaching out to kids from really rough areas.

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Speaker 2: But he grew up in the gang life too. He

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Speaker 2: said the same thing to me, his uncles, his brothers,

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Speaker 2: that's what he saw, that's what he grew up in

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Speaker 2: until he got shot and ended up in jail and

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Speaker 2: everything else and thought, well, maybe this isn't right. But

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Speaker 2: I guess what I'm saying is, where's the disconnect, because

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Speaker 2: I know you're seeing some positive stuff. Is it is

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Speaker 2: at the allure of the power and the money as well.

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Speaker 1: I mean, those were definitely some of the elements that

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Speaker 1: kept me. But coming from a culture of Chicago native

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Speaker 1: loyalty was the ground thing of you loyal to this life,

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Speaker 1: no matter what you're teaching me this. I'm a kid,

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Speaker 1: so that's struck, that's in my head. So I felt

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Speaker 1: like I was being disloyal if I didn't stick to

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Speaker 1: the teachings that I was taught by my dad. It

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Speaker 1: wasn't until I got to federal prison that I did

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Speaker 1: start to feel disdaining against him, or I was. He

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Speaker 1: actually passed away when we were not on speaking terms,

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Speaker 1: because I was so angry with him for exposing me

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Speaker 1: to that lifestyle. How he grew up the same way

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Speaker 1: his dad was a big game. That's it was just following.

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Speaker 2: That's the that's the thing. It's now a generational thing

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Speaker 2: telling some reguard. He was a victim to it too,

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Speaker 2: that he ended up perpetuating.

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Speaker 1: But you still That's why I cut ties, because even

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Speaker 1: at seventy years old, he still had the mindset like

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Speaker 1: when is enough enough? When I got shot, I got

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Speaker 1: shot when I was eighteen. That made me not want

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Speaker 1: to be a part of them, the gang life.

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Speaker 2: Let's get to that. So your mama says no more,

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Speaker 2: and I mean, let's be honest. You were molested and

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Speaker 2: abused for six years. Good for your mama, Enough's enough.

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Speaker 2: But the problem is now you come back to your mama,

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Speaker 2: but you got all the Chicago left in you.

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Speaker 1: So and I was the trouble child like my sister.

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Speaker 1: My sister that were not exposed to the things that

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Speaker 1: I was. So when I came home, I dealt with

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Speaker 1: things the only way I knew how fight.

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Speaker 3: So I was very angry.

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Speaker 2: Were you fighting in school?

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Speaker 3: Lighting in school?

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Speaker 2: Were you going to school?

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Speaker 1: Yeah, my mom didn't play that. Where'd you go to school? Advance?

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Speaker 1: When I was in junior high, I got kicked out

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Speaker 1: of there. I initially went to Huns, got kicked out

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Speaker 1: of the air. So I ended my school year at

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Speaker 1: Comprehensive Pupil Service Centers that used to be called Tech

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Speaker 1: High School. They started putting all the trouble kids in

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Speaker 1: one place.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, my great grandfather played football Tech High School anyway,

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Speaker 2: But I know what it is. It's over there next

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Speaker 2: to the VP station, right.

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Speaker 1: They had to put me over there because I kept

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Speaker 1: getting expelled.

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Speaker 3: I just wanted for fighting, for fighting.

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Speaker 1: After I realized what my uncle did, and I felt

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Speaker 1: like I was a child and I couldn't do nothing

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Speaker 1: about it. I made a vow to myself nobody else

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Speaker 1: would hurt me. So I had this persona of being

348
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Speaker 1: like angry all the time. Bully. They know me for fighting.

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Speaker 1: They know I'm not gonna talk. I'm gonna fight, and

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Speaker 1: if you get to the point, I'm gonna shoot, gonna

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Speaker 1: stat whatever the case was gonna be.

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Speaker 3: That's what my mindset.

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Speaker 2: Was set at. Were you carrying? Yeah? How were you first?

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Speaker 1: My first gun was given to me by my dad

355
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Speaker 1: was a Dillinger. I was nine years old and talked

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Speaker 1: to you.

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Speaker 2: kN So, so now you're in Memphis, you're getting through

358
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Speaker 2: high school, the troubled high school, you're fighting. Where does

359
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Speaker 2: it lead to?

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Speaker 1: I met my husband. Unfortunately, you attracted to what you know.

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Speaker 1: So I found the bad guy and I'm at thirteen.

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Speaker 1: Fin turned fourteen. At this time I got pregnant with

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Speaker 1: my first son, which was by my husband.

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Speaker 3: We ended up getting married.

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Speaker 1: Except when I was seventeen, my mom was like she

366
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Speaker 1: couldn't control me. I would run away to be with him,

367
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Speaker 1: get in trouble all the time. She'll get a call

368
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Speaker 1: that's when juvenile call and we got your daughter. So

369
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Speaker 1: she realized that you can't hold me in the house.

370
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Speaker 1: Now I got a one baby, I thought I was grown.

371
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Speaker 1: So when I got pregnant with my second child as fifteen,

372
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Speaker 1: he asked my mom and dad could he marry me.

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Speaker 1: Of course, my dad was in prison, so my mom

374
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Speaker 1: they did agree to let me get married, and that

375
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Speaker 1: side of my I thought I was gonna stop the

376
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Speaker 1: street stuff because my husband was the type of guy

377
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Speaker 1: that he's a head. He didn't want me in the streets.

378
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Speaker 1: He wanted me in the house. But we butted his

379
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Speaker 1: because all I knew was to be stubborn and strong.

380
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Speaker 1: You're not gonna tell me what to do. And then

381
00:24:16,840 --> 00:24:20,200
Speaker 1: we moved from Memphis to Mason, Tennessee, to his family

382
00:24:20,520 --> 00:24:24,680
Speaker 1: is predominant from there. When we got there, I didn't

383
00:24:24,720 --> 00:24:27,400
Speaker 1: have so much to worry about with the gang side

384
00:24:27,440 --> 00:24:30,320
Speaker 1: of things or being but he was an alcoholic that

385
00:24:30,440 --> 00:24:32,960
Speaker 1: didn't realize he was one or didn't want to admit

386
00:24:33,000 --> 00:24:37,320
Speaker 1: that he was one, so the violence he started being

387
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Speaker 1: very abusive. By the time I was twenty one, we

388
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Speaker 1: had four kids. So here I am a twenty one

389
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Speaker 1: year old, were four kids married since I was seventeen.

390
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Speaker 2: In no real education except for the streets.

391
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Speaker 3: That's see in an abusive relationship.

392
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Speaker 1: So the anger I had so much trauma at that

393
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Speaker 1: time I didn't identify as trauma, but now I know

394
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Speaker 1: that's what it was. I was traumatized so much that

395
00:25:02,720 --> 00:25:06,800
Speaker 1: I started to become so depressed that I didn't want

396
00:25:06,840 --> 00:25:09,720
Speaker 1: to address because again from my culture, it was not

397
00:25:09,840 --> 00:25:12,160
Speaker 1: talked about to go see nobody and talk about no,

398
00:25:12,440 --> 00:25:14,760
Speaker 1: you know, that was like the no no. We talked

399
00:25:14,760 --> 00:25:16,240
Speaker 1: to God, that's what we talked to. You don't talk

400
00:25:16,280 --> 00:25:18,679
Speaker 1: to no doctors, you don't get on no medicine. So

401
00:25:18,760 --> 00:25:22,720
Speaker 1: I started doing what I felt like was best for me, and.

402
00:25:22,720 --> 00:25:23,240
Speaker 3: I just.

403
00:25:25,040 --> 00:25:28,400
Speaker 1: Being angry balance was the only thing that curved, and

404
00:25:28,440 --> 00:25:31,679
Speaker 1: that that was just just be me being honest. I

405
00:25:31,680 --> 00:25:33,800
Speaker 1: felt like if I could hurt somebody and show them

406
00:25:33,840 --> 00:25:37,400
Speaker 1: I'm not scared, I'm not pumped like they know what's up,

407
00:25:37,440 --> 00:25:40,480
Speaker 1: I'm not to be played with. And that was my mindset,

408
00:25:40,800 --> 00:25:45,719
Speaker 1: not thinking that this is really sick to think like this.

409
00:25:45,920 --> 00:25:49,320
Speaker 1: But then I didn't think like that. It wasn't until

410
00:25:49,359 --> 00:25:53,520
Speaker 1: my son that's now thirty three, he was five and

411
00:25:53,640 --> 00:25:59,439
Speaker 1: he he had a cat. He tortured this cat, that

412
00:25:59,560 --> 00:26:03,479
Speaker 1: I knew something was wrong in our whole household because

413
00:26:03,520 --> 00:26:06,600
Speaker 1: as a five year old, he was just beating his

414
00:26:06,720 --> 00:26:09,639
Speaker 1: cat and the only thing he kept saying was I

415
00:26:09,680 --> 00:26:11,560
Speaker 1: was like, why did you do that? And he was like,

416
00:26:11,600 --> 00:26:15,480
Speaker 1: that's what dad did to you. You and Dad was fighting.

417
00:26:15,920 --> 00:26:18,240
Speaker 1: That broke me out. That was my first attempt of

418
00:26:18,320 --> 00:26:22,800
Speaker 1: suicide because one thing I did say to myself was

419
00:26:22,840 --> 00:26:23,639
Speaker 1: that my kids, I.

420
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Speaker 3: Don't never get hurt by nobody.

421
00:26:26,200 --> 00:26:28,280
Speaker 1: Little that I know, I'm the finly one hurting him

422
00:26:28,320 --> 00:26:31,320
Speaker 1: because I didn't know how to be a parent, because

423
00:26:31,359 --> 00:26:34,159
Speaker 1: I tried to be grown before my time, and because

424
00:26:34,200 --> 00:26:38,320
Speaker 1: my mom was offering the advice of a mother and

425
00:26:38,440 --> 00:26:41,720
Speaker 1: I was like, you know, I didn't want to listen

426
00:26:41,760 --> 00:26:45,520
Speaker 1: to that or receive it. I closed myself off in

427
00:26:45,600 --> 00:26:47,840
Speaker 1: my own household, and I thought what I was doing

428
00:26:47,960 --> 00:26:50,280
Speaker 1: was right. As long as they don't get molested, nobody

429
00:26:50,280 --> 00:26:52,080
Speaker 1: can touch them, that's the right thing to do. But

430
00:26:52,119 --> 00:26:55,760
Speaker 1: that's not the case. They still were exposed to violence,

431
00:26:56,440 --> 00:26:59,280
Speaker 1: that was exposed to being angry all the time.

432
00:27:00,080 --> 00:27:00,439
Speaker 3: Pressure.

433
00:27:00,680 --> 00:27:03,879
Speaker 1: Like my daughter now just turned thirty five last week,

434
00:27:04,119 --> 00:27:07,520
Speaker 1: we have we're this clothes now because she opened up

435
00:27:07,560 --> 00:27:09,560
Speaker 1: to me about things she never told me when she

436
00:27:09,720 --> 00:27:13,240
Speaker 1: was small, about they were tired of the fighting, and

437
00:27:13,359 --> 00:27:14,280
Speaker 1: my husband shot at me.

438
00:27:14,359 --> 00:27:16,679
Speaker 3: I shot at him. He stabbed me. I stabbed him.

439
00:27:17,000 --> 00:27:20,320
Speaker 1: But it was just me and my own gangland in

440
00:27:20,359 --> 00:27:23,679
Speaker 1: my own household. So I still was in my mindset

441
00:27:23,840 --> 00:27:26,160
Speaker 1: so to leave him. And his words to me were

442
00:27:26,280 --> 00:27:28,840
Speaker 1: he was a provider, but he was also an abuser.

443
00:27:29,160 --> 00:27:31,440
Speaker 1: I had never had a job. I've always been at

444
00:27:31,440 --> 00:27:33,080
Speaker 1: home with the kids. I grew up with the kids

445
00:27:33,080 --> 00:27:36,240
Speaker 1: because I had me you. So his thing to me was,

446
00:27:36,280 --> 00:27:38,640
Speaker 1: you'll never make it. Every time I attempted to leave.

447
00:27:39,080 --> 00:27:41,120
Speaker 1: You got kids, you ain't got no job, you ain't

448
00:27:41,119 --> 00:27:44,119
Speaker 1: got no education. What you're gonna do? That was how

449
00:27:44,119 --> 00:27:47,840
Speaker 1: I got right back into interacting with people from Chicago,

450
00:27:48,040 --> 00:27:53,199
Speaker 1: cousins that were into fraud. And that's that's when my

451
00:27:53,280 --> 00:27:55,720
Speaker 1: journey began. I'm gonna show him I can get money

452
00:27:55,760 --> 00:27:56,200
Speaker 1: out on me.

453
00:27:57,920 --> 00:28:00,560
Speaker 2: So now you started messing with chuck up.

454
00:28:00,800 --> 00:28:04,320
Speaker 1: Yes, and I thought I was doing it. I mean

455
00:28:04,720 --> 00:28:07,320
Speaker 1: buying cars at the house. We're doing this and it's

456
00:28:07,359 --> 00:28:11,000
Speaker 1: all of me, not him. So I attempted to leave

457
00:28:11,119 --> 00:28:13,960
Speaker 1: him and get my own place. I got a place

458
00:28:14,040 --> 00:28:17,440
Speaker 1: out in East Sniffice and we our home was in Frasier,

459
00:28:18,119 --> 00:28:19,920
Speaker 1: So I was like, I don't need him no more.

460
00:28:20,200 --> 00:28:23,840
Speaker 1: I'm done with that. I got this, but I found myself.

461
00:28:24,400 --> 00:28:28,040
Speaker 1: My kids were always at my mom's house or his

462
00:28:28,240 --> 00:28:31,880
Speaker 1: mom's house. I'm out of town doing all this stuff

463
00:28:32,200 --> 00:28:35,600
Speaker 1: and now becoming a person I said I'd never be

464
00:28:35,600 --> 00:28:38,280
Speaker 1: because I grew up with my kids. We were close.

465
00:28:39,040 --> 00:28:42,560
Speaker 1: So now you're neglecting them just to get money, and

466
00:28:42,600 --> 00:28:46,160
Speaker 1: I start buying them materialistic things. Was being a parent.

467
00:28:46,960 --> 00:28:50,360
Speaker 1: So my justification was they got everything new this South.

468
00:28:50,440 --> 00:28:51,440
Speaker 1: They got a nice.

469
00:28:54,960 --> 00:28:57,200
Speaker 2: So you got arrested for fraud.

470
00:28:58,120 --> 00:29:00,800
Speaker 1: I stepped over the state and went federal. I got

471
00:29:00,800 --> 00:29:05,200
Speaker 1: caught in a federal indictment, fifty nine count indictment. I

472
00:29:05,240 --> 00:29:08,080
Speaker 1: played out to seventeen counts. I was the ring leader,

473
00:29:08,360 --> 00:29:12,640
Speaker 1: so my first sentence was ten years. I had never

474
00:29:12,680 --> 00:29:15,160
Speaker 1: been in trouble other than June now here and there

475
00:29:15,320 --> 00:29:16,600
Speaker 1: for petty theft's fighting.

476
00:29:18,280 --> 00:29:19,440
Speaker 3: They gave me ten years.

477
00:29:19,880 --> 00:29:23,720
Speaker 1: I did my time in tallahasse Border from two thousand

478
00:29:23,800 --> 00:29:26,440
Speaker 1: to two thousand and seven. I wasn't now two years

479
00:29:26,480 --> 00:29:30,880
Speaker 1: and I was back in federal prison. Because I came home,

480
00:29:31,840 --> 00:29:34,000
Speaker 1: I had already made a vow to myself. I wasn't

481
00:29:34,040 --> 00:29:37,000
Speaker 1: going back to my husband, so that was out of

482
00:29:37,040 --> 00:29:40,840
Speaker 1: the question. I came home with the intentions. I really

483
00:29:40,840 --> 00:29:47,640
Speaker 1: did try to change. There was nothing resource wise that

484
00:29:47,840 --> 00:29:50,480
Speaker 1: was fit for me in my situation. It was one

485
00:29:50,520 --> 00:29:53,880
Speaker 1: door after another on closing. Okay, I did the crime.

486
00:29:53,920 --> 00:29:55,959
Speaker 1: I played again. It did at the time, and now

487
00:29:56,000 --> 00:29:59,320
Speaker 1: I'm having trouble not only getting housing for a job too.

488
00:30:00,040 --> 00:30:01,960
Speaker 3: It's two of the major things. I'm gonna need to

489
00:30:01,960 --> 00:30:02,960
Speaker 3: sit down somewhere.

490
00:30:06,600 --> 00:30:07,600
Speaker 2: We'll be right back.

491
00:30:14,840 --> 00:30:15,640
Speaker 3: I ended up.

492
00:30:15,720 --> 00:30:19,000
Speaker 1: Looking up with a new friend of mine that let's

493
00:30:19,040 --> 00:30:23,000
Speaker 1: get out of Memphis and moved to Springfield, thinking that's

494
00:30:23,000 --> 00:30:26,360
Speaker 1: gonna save me, where I eventually met my daughter, my

495
00:30:26,480 --> 00:30:29,680
Speaker 1: last child. I have five kids now four by my husband.

496
00:30:29,920 --> 00:30:33,680
Speaker 1: I have a fifteen year old. When I met her dad, Okay,

497
00:30:33,720 --> 00:30:37,720
Speaker 1: I thought I was doing something different. He was just

498
00:30:37,960 --> 00:30:40,720
Speaker 1: he wasn't a gang member, he didn't do that, but

499
00:30:40,800 --> 00:30:44,320
Speaker 1: he was a drug builder. So now I'm into a

500
00:30:44,360 --> 00:30:47,080
Speaker 1: different world. All my life, my dad and I'm soldiers.

501
00:30:47,200 --> 00:30:50,040
Speaker 1: I was never the one to do that. I just

502
00:30:50,160 --> 00:30:52,600
Speaker 1: like to collect money, but I never knew about the

503
00:30:52,640 --> 00:30:55,560
Speaker 1: process of that. But I knew it was money, So

504
00:30:55,800 --> 00:30:57,720
Speaker 1: getting with him, I was like, okay, I ain't got

505
00:30:57,840 --> 00:30:58,320
Speaker 1: to do nothing.

506
00:30:58,360 --> 00:31:00,280
Speaker 3: Now he's gonna do this that.

507
00:31:00,760 --> 00:31:03,200
Speaker 1: Well, I'm still exposed to things I'm not I should

508
00:31:03,240 --> 00:31:05,800
Speaker 1: be exposed to because with drug deal and comes, you

509
00:31:05,880 --> 00:31:09,760
Speaker 1: need guns. I'm not supposed to be around guns. So

510
00:31:10,520 --> 00:31:12,640
Speaker 1: my son moved. I moved him from Memphis because he

511
00:31:12,680 --> 00:31:16,680
Speaker 1: started getting in trouble. Come to Springfield, get away from Memphis.

512
00:31:17,560 --> 00:31:20,240
Speaker 1: He decided to be a crip, so he was a

513
00:31:20,320 --> 00:31:24,880
Speaker 1: kitchen kitchen crip. Brought him to Missouri. He started getting

514
00:31:24,880 --> 00:31:26,920
Speaker 1: into all kinds of stuff down. I had been there

515
00:31:26,960 --> 00:31:29,280
Speaker 1: a year before I brought him. Nobody knew me on

516
00:31:29,320 --> 00:31:33,440
Speaker 1: my street. He was there a week, everybody knew him.

517
00:31:34,040 --> 00:31:37,520
Speaker 1: Traffic started. So he ended up getting in some trouble

518
00:31:37,560 --> 00:31:42,320
Speaker 1: where they had on a criminal complaint. It wasn't a warning,

519
00:31:42,360 --> 00:31:45,920
Speaker 1: it was criminal complaint to come talk to him or

520
00:31:45,960 --> 00:31:48,400
Speaker 1: whatever about a situation that happened at a store.

521
00:31:49,040 --> 00:31:51,320
Speaker 3: And when they came, of.

522
00:31:51,320 --> 00:31:54,440
Speaker 1: Course you give him probable cause he's in the garage,

523
00:31:54,480 --> 00:31:58,320
Speaker 1: garage up, guns in the garage, drugs in the garage.

524
00:32:00,040 --> 00:32:00,960
Speaker 2: You're going back to jail.

525
00:32:01,120 --> 00:32:02,480
Speaker 3: And that's exactly what happened.

526
00:32:03,880 --> 00:32:08,680
Speaker 2: Okay, So we got you up to a point. Now

527
00:32:08,680 --> 00:32:12,040
Speaker 2: we're going to get Nardo to that same point. The

528
00:32:12,120 --> 00:32:18,600
Speaker 2: point is though, as I hear your story, I hear

529
00:32:19,720 --> 00:32:29,280
Speaker 2: sexual abuse, I hear surrounded by gangs, drugs, guns, I

530
00:32:29,320 --> 00:32:35,560
Speaker 2: hear poor education, I hear locked up twice. I hear

531
00:32:36,760 --> 00:32:42,160
Speaker 2: five children who honestly grupts in some of the same

532
00:32:42,200 --> 00:32:45,680
Speaker 2: things you saw. And that has to leave to a

533
00:32:45,760 --> 00:32:50,240
Speaker 2: bunch of hard ache from all. But all of that

534
00:32:51,480 --> 00:33:02,360
Speaker 2: says you really do understand the today's most vulnerable communities

535
00:33:02,400 --> 00:33:05,960
Speaker 2: to gun violence and games, because you have absolutely. But

536
00:33:07,600 --> 00:33:09,800
Speaker 2: we'll get to the redemption part on you in a second.

537
00:33:09,960 --> 00:33:14,000
Speaker 2: But now it's time to go to Lenardo. What's your background? Man?

538
00:33:16,160 --> 00:33:21,360
Speaker 4: Well, well, I was born in Geary Now. My mother

539
00:33:21,440 --> 00:33:25,000
Speaker 4: brought me down her probably about two or three, down

540
00:33:25,080 --> 00:33:28,960
Speaker 4: to Memphis. Down to Memphis, my mother and father got

541
00:33:29,040 --> 00:33:32,520
Speaker 4: divorced when I was like four years old, and that

542
00:33:32,640 --> 00:33:35,360
Speaker 4: part of my life, that's where the hurt and the

543
00:33:35,440 --> 00:33:36,520
Speaker 4: pain came.

544
00:33:38,320 --> 00:33:38,600
Speaker 2: Missed.

545
00:33:38,600 --> 00:33:42,080
Speaker 4: My father wanted my father around, but he wasn't able

546
00:33:42,120 --> 00:33:44,720
Speaker 4: to be. He moved to California because he had a

547
00:33:44,840 --> 00:33:48,440
Speaker 4: job opportunity to with fed X. So my mother we

548
00:33:48,560 --> 00:33:52,840
Speaker 4: in Orange. Ma'am single mom trying to raise a young man.

549
00:33:53,480 --> 00:33:57,400
Speaker 4: She got to work. I got free time. And I

550
00:33:57,440 --> 00:34:00,040
Speaker 4: mean the free time started like when I was in

551
00:34:00,120 --> 00:34:03,800
Speaker 4: fourth grade going to Cherokee ELEMENTI I had my own

552
00:34:03,880 --> 00:34:06,600
Speaker 4: key to get in the house to a colin chick,

553
00:34:06,680 --> 00:34:09,239
Speaker 4: only to make sure they meant the house. But then

554
00:34:09,320 --> 00:34:11,839
Speaker 4: afterd it, I'm free to do whatever I wanted to do.

555
00:34:12,719 --> 00:34:17,200
Speaker 4: Orange Mound, for those of us listening, is really a

556
00:34:17,360 --> 00:34:24,040
Speaker 4: historical Black Memphis neighborhood and at one time was kind

557
00:34:24,040 --> 00:34:29,920
Speaker 4: of a bustling black business center. Melrose High School is

558
00:34:29,960 --> 00:34:33,799
Speaker 4: the high school that anchors that place, and there at

559
00:34:33,800 --> 00:34:37,080
Speaker 4: one time was an enormous amount of pride of black

560
00:34:37,160 --> 00:34:42,600
Speaker 4: pride with entrepreneurship and community and everything else in Orange Mound,

561
00:34:42,680 --> 00:34:49,640
Speaker 4: and over time a lot of that has disintegrated. But unfortunately,

562
00:34:49,719 --> 00:34:51,240
Speaker 4: I mean, I think there's still a lot of pride

563
00:34:51,280 --> 00:34:55,320
Speaker 4: in Orange Mound, but that sense of community and everything

564
00:34:55,360 --> 00:34:58,239
Speaker 4: that's happened there disintegrated. So the fact that when you

565
00:34:58,280 --> 00:35:02,200
Speaker 4: were coming up and grade, walking home, having your own

566
00:35:02,280 --> 00:35:07,480
Speaker 4: key to your home in Orange Mound, I wasn't uncommon

567
00:35:07,520 --> 00:35:13,440
Speaker 4: at all. What's it? Well, no, it wasn't uncommon. But

568
00:35:13,560 --> 00:35:15,560
Speaker 4: the main things that I seen when I was walking

569
00:35:15,560 --> 00:35:18,920
Speaker 4: home was drug deals. Seeing the drug deals in the

570
00:35:18,960 --> 00:35:23,080
Speaker 4: new Lexus with gold rims sitting across the yard. They're

571
00:35:23,080 --> 00:35:24,120
Speaker 4: standing on the corner.

572
00:35:24,200 --> 00:35:24,400
Speaker 2: You know.

573
00:35:24,520 --> 00:35:27,840
Speaker 4: During that time, that's when they hit autmot was growing.

574
00:35:28,040 --> 00:35:31,000
Speaker 4: You got to be rope necklace's own goals in your

575
00:35:31,000 --> 00:35:35,080
Speaker 4: mouth all that, and it was at my age, it

576
00:35:35,160 --> 00:35:36,160
Speaker 4: was it was inviting.

577
00:35:36,520 --> 00:35:37,160
Speaker 2: I was fot.

578
00:35:37,440 --> 00:35:41,640
Speaker 4: Yeah, you know you got the troop jogging suits back then.

579
00:35:42,880 --> 00:35:47,080
Speaker 2: I forgot about those. Yeah, wrapped out with a grill

580
00:35:47,200 --> 00:35:49,440
Speaker 2: or a big road chain and some gold speaders on

581
00:35:49,480 --> 00:35:53,359
Speaker 2: a Lexus, trews and voes and all that cadillacts.

582
00:35:53,920 --> 00:35:56,880
Speaker 4: You know, those are the things that I seen. But

583
00:35:57,600 --> 00:36:01,040
Speaker 4: my push and drive was football. And I loved playing

584
00:36:01,040 --> 00:36:04,080
Speaker 4: football because me and my daddy we used to play catch.

585
00:36:04,600 --> 00:36:06,840
Speaker 4: He always throw the football two millia to show me

586
00:36:06,840 --> 00:36:09,440
Speaker 4: how to get into three points staying and all that

587
00:36:09,480 --> 00:36:13,040
Speaker 4: type of stuff. And so I was connected to football

588
00:36:13,080 --> 00:36:16,440
Speaker 4: because my daddy played football for Menos High School. And

589
00:36:16,520 --> 00:36:20,080
Speaker 4: so when he left, that was like a big part

590
00:36:20,120 --> 00:36:22,920
Speaker 4: of me just like was empty. So when I started,

591
00:36:23,120 --> 00:36:25,600
Speaker 4: I started playing football when I was like in the

592
00:36:25,680 --> 00:36:28,160
Speaker 4: fourth fifth grade. My mama signed me up to this

593
00:36:28,239 --> 00:36:32,080
Speaker 4: pee wee team called the Cherokee Dolphins and uh, and

594
00:36:32,120 --> 00:36:35,399
Speaker 4: that was my journey and playing football. But I really

595
00:36:35,400 --> 00:36:36,520
Speaker 4: played football mad.

596
00:36:37,480 --> 00:36:38,759
Speaker 2: I didn't. I didn't.

597
00:36:39,080 --> 00:36:43,120
Speaker 4: I really didn't tap into the joy because I was

598
00:36:43,239 --> 00:36:47,560
Speaker 4: always mad because my father wasn't there. My mother couldn't

599
00:36:47,560 --> 00:36:51,680
Speaker 4: be there because she had to work. So in my madness,

600
00:36:51,920 --> 00:36:54,879
Speaker 4: I just love to hit people. So the coach put

601
00:36:54,920 --> 00:36:59,480
Speaker 4: me from I played defensive tackle defensive end to playing linebacker,

602
00:37:00,160 --> 00:37:02,759
Speaker 4: and I just love hitting people. And the and the

603
00:37:02,800 --> 00:37:05,879
Speaker 4: crazy part about it is that every time I hit

604
00:37:05,960 --> 00:37:09,920
Speaker 4: somebody hard, coaching come slap me across my head and

605
00:37:10,080 --> 00:37:14,040
Speaker 4: ain't good job, good job, and and and I found

606
00:37:14,960 --> 00:37:19,040
Speaker 4: I found a sense of approval when it happened. So

607
00:37:19,239 --> 00:37:22,960
Speaker 4: all the way through Keewe, through middle school to high school,

608
00:37:23,200 --> 00:37:26,239
Speaker 4: I made it my business to hit somebody hard so

609
00:37:26,400 --> 00:37:28,279
Speaker 4: that I can get that hat on the back from

610
00:37:28,320 --> 00:37:31,280
Speaker 4: the coach because my father wasn't now and my mama

611
00:37:31,400 --> 00:37:33,640
Speaker 4: she just she tried to be there as much as

612
00:37:33,640 --> 00:37:36,600
Speaker 4: she could, but she couldn't. It was times I walked

613
00:37:36,600 --> 00:37:40,840
Speaker 4: from Orange maund to what's the name of that park,

614
00:37:41,480 --> 00:37:44,840
Speaker 4: but the park was by Cherokee, and I'm just walking

615
00:37:44,840 --> 00:37:48,840
Speaker 4: with my helmet pads and and just being dedicated to

616
00:37:48,840 --> 00:37:52,360
Speaker 4: getting Now. I used to run from Airways middle school

617
00:37:52,719 --> 00:37:54,360
Speaker 4: all the way to May Roads to make it to

618
00:37:54,400 --> 00:38:00,080
Speaker 4: the practice that's across Center Straate. Almost yeah, and so

619
00:38:00,200 --> 00:38:03,440
Speaker 4: it was like, but that was the drive I had,

620
00:38:04,239 --> 00:38:05,280
Speaker 4: and I wanted to play.

621
00:38:06,200 --> 00:38:06,600
Speaker 2: And so.

622
00:38:08,440 --> 00:38:11,200
Speaker 4: That during that time again I had a lot of

623
00:38:11,239 --> 00:38:15,759
Speaker 4: free time I had, you know, and my uncles, they

624
00:38:15,840 --> 00:38:19,000
Speaker 4: was the ones that really showed me how to be

625
00:38:19,040 --> 00:38:22,239
Speaker 4: a man or gave me an example, you need to

626
00:38:22,239 --> 00:38:24,800
Speaker 4: do this, you need to do that as a young man.

627
00:38:25,360 --> 00:38:27,480
Speaker 4: And so one thing they planned in my head that

628
00:38:28,480 --> 00:38:30,600
Speaker 4: you know even right now to damn like that was

629
00:38:30,640 --> 00:38:34,240
Speaker 4: a bad plan, was to knock off as many women

630
00:38:34,280 --> 00:38:38,520
Speaker 4: as you can. Don't fall in love, just knock off

631
00:38:38,520 --> 00:38:39,520
Speaker 4: as many women.

632
00:38:39,280 --> 00:38:39,759
Speaker 3: As you can.

633
00:38:40,200 --> 00:38:43,560
Speaker 4: So guess what, at the age of sixteen, I had

634
00:38:43,600 --> 00:38:47,840
Speaker 4: my first son and I was still I was still

635
00:38:47,880 --> 00:38:51,760
Speaker 4: in middle school. I was in my last year middle school.

636
00:38:52,520 --> 00:38:54,440
Speaker 4: The young lady, she was a year older than me

637
00:38:54,760 --> 00:38:57,040
Speaker 4: and she was already going to Mail Roads.

638
00:38:57,320 --> 00:38:57,640
Speaker 2: And so.

639
00:38:59,200 --> 00:39:01,319
Speaker 4: That moment, right there was a change of moment in

640
00:39:01,360 --> 00:39:04,600
Speaker 4: my life because her and her father came over to

641
00:39:04,719 --> 00:39:07,680
Speaker 4: my mother's house to tell my mother, did you know

642
00:39:07,760 --> 00:39:11,600
Speaker 4: she was pregnant? And I'll never forget this moment when

643
00:39:11,680 --> 00:39:14,799
Speaker 4: that happened, and me and my mother, we was in

644
00:39:14,840 --> 00:39:18,400
Speaker 4: her room, sitting on the bed and I was just crying,

645
00:39:18,760 --> 00:39:19,719
Speaker 4: and she just hugd me.

646
00:39:19,800 --> 00:39:23,520
Speaker 2: She said, we gonna make it through this. I gotta

647
00:39:23,560 --> 00:39:33,319
Speaker 2: ask you a question, in what man, I don't understand?

648
00:39:33,480 --> 00:39:41,200
Speaker 2: So you know some of this content, some of this

649
00:39:41,440 --> 00:39:52,239
Speaker 2: content is culturally Oh gosh, I'm choosing my words so

650
00:39:52,360 --> 00:40:02,480
Speaker 2: carefully here. The cultural ethos among people who only live

651
00:40:02,640 --> 00:40:07,840
Speaker 2: five miles from one another is so distinct, so different.

652
00:40:09,440 --> 00:40:12,840
Speaker 2: And even though my mom was being divorced five times,

653
00:40:12,880 --> 00:40:15,680
Speaker 2: my father left when I was four years old and

654
00:40:15,800 --> 00:40:18,759
Speaker 2: I never saw him again, and he died a year ago,

655
00:40:19,000 --> 00:40:22,120
Speaker 2: and I got a phone call, all right, so that's mine.

656
00:40:22,600 --> 00:40:25,319
Speaker 2: I let her in six sports in high school. I

657
00:40:25,480 --> 00:40:32,200
Speaker 2: also have a very a serious kinship with you because

658
00:40:32,239 --> 00:40:34,800
Speaker 2: I know what it's like to be carrying your helmet

659
00:40:34,840 --> 00:40:38,640
Speaker 2: and shoulder pads and walking rain and watching and I

660
00:40:38,719 --> 00:40:40,400
Speaker 2: was a dog, if you want to know the truth,

661
00:40:40,840 --> 00:40:44,719
Speaker 2: and watching all those kids walk off the field with

662
00:40:44,760 --> 00:40:47,600
Speaker 2: their daddies and their mama was carrying their stuff for him.

663
00:40:47,880 --> 00:40:49,360
Speaker 2: And there I am. I just scored the winter in

664
00:40:49,440 --> 00:40:52,200
Speaker 2: touchdown and I'm walking by myself, and I know that hurt.

665
00:40:52,280 --> 00:40:56,400
Speaker 2: I feel it all right, But there wasn't anybody telling

666
00:40:56,440 --> 00:40:58,759
Speaker 2: me to go get girls pregnant, to knock up as

667
00:40:58,800 --> 00:41:00,759
Speaker 2: many girls as you can, don't all in love with them,

668
00:41:00,840 --> 00:41:05,520
Speaker 2: just be a alpha male and do all that. I

669
00:41:05,560 --> 00:41:10,759
Speaker 2: don't even understand that culture. Why, how, what sense does

670
00:41:10,760 --> 00:41:12,960
Speaker 2: that make? And why would a grown ass man be

671
00:41:13,040 --> 00:41:18,600
Speaker 2: telling a kid that stuff? That's disgusting. I mean, now

672
00:41:18,640 --> 00:41:20,600
Speaker 2: I've just went and said how I feel about it,

673
00:41:20,640 --> 00:41:23,000
Speaker 2: and I don't want people to hear that. I'm not

674
00:41:23,400 --> 00:41:26,840
Speaker 2: casting judgment on you or your family or where you

675
00:41:26,920 --> 00:41:33,080
Speaker 2: come from from just a judgmental perspective, but damn, that's wrong.

676
00:41:33,239 --> 00:41:35,480
Speaker 2: And I don't even understand why anybody would ever tell

677
00:41:35,520 --> 00:41:38,720
Speaker 2: a kid. Where does that come from? In that culture?

678
00:41:39,320 --> 00:41:40,080
Speaker 2: Can you tell me?

679
00:41:40,440 --> 00:41:43,360
Speaker 4: Well, the only thing I can tell you from from

680
00:41:43,400 --> 00:41:47,520
Speaker 4: my perspective is that they had plenty of different women,

681
00:41:48,200 --> 00:41:51,880
Speaker 4: and I watched it. I didn't watched my uncle have

682
00:41:51,960 --> 00:41:54,680
Speaker 4: a woman all my mama house, and just because she

683
00:41:54,719 --> 00:41:57,919
Speaker 4: wouldn't do it, he say do he put out the house.

684
00:41:57,920 --> 00:42:00,000
Speaker 4: And I watched her welco up the street while house.

685
00:42:01,600 --> 00:42:05,800
Speaker 4: So those are the things I seen And if you okay,

686
00:42:06,120 --> 00:42:09,759
Speaker 4: but where does that come from even before. Okay, where

687
00:42:09,760 --> 00:42:10,960
Speaker 4: did that illustration come from?

688
00:42:11,040 --> 00:42:19,120
Speaker 2: Here? What I'm saying is it seems to me that, yeah,

689
00:42:19,160 --> 00:42:23,880
Speaker 2: we got a crime problem, and flow it seems to

690
00:42:23,920 --> 00:42:29,239
Speaker 2: me we've got a gang problem, and it seems to

691
00:42:29,239 --> 00:42:31,719
Speaker 2: me we got a drug problem. And it seems to me,

692
00:42:31,880 --> 00:42:34,399
Speaker 2: and I can keep saying this, everybody's like, well, all right,

693
00:42:34,480 --> 00:42:38,080
Speaker 2: you're master of the obvious, all right, But what really

694
00:42:38,080 --> 00:42:39,919
Speaker 2: seems to me that I don't think we talk about

695
00:42:40,040 --> 00:42:47,520
Speaker 2: enough is we got a morality problem. Definitely, definitely, And

696
00:42:47,560 --> 00:42:50,200
Speaker 2: you know what, if we're gonna be real with each other.

697
00:42:51,040 --> 00:42:55,320
Speaker 2: A white man can't say that in a black community.

698
00:42:57,440 --> 00:43:03,560
Speaker 2: But every time I hear the stories, I feel it

699
00:43:03,640 --> 00:43:07,960
Speaker 2: and it hurts me. I mean it genuinely does. And

700
00:43:08,080 --> 00:43:10,279
Speaker 2: I see y'all both looking at me shaking your heads

701
00:43:10,320 --> 00:43:16,680
Speaker 2: up down having lived this life and it's real.

702
00:43:16,960 --> 00:43:20,640
Speaker 4: It is real, and you and you hearing us, just

703
00:43:20,719 --> 00:43:23,359
Speaker 4: imagine what the generation going through now when it's when

704
00:43:23,360 --> 00:43:26,120
Speaker 4: it's when it's when it is put out through music

705
00:43:26,680 --> 00:43:28,520
Speaker 4: and movies and all ends.

706
00:43:30,719 --> 00:43:34,880
Speaker 2: All of the pop culture stuff you're saying is perpetuating

707
00:43:35,480 --> 00:43:39,640
Speaker 2: this morality problem. You see it and you hear it,

708
00:43:47,320 --> 00:43:50,799
Speaker 2: and that concludes part one of my conversation with Flo

709
00:43:50,880 --> 00:43:53,839
Speaker 2: and Rinardo, and you do not want to miss part two.

710
00:43:54,200 --> 00:43:57,840
Speaker 2: That's now Ava able to listen to together. Guys, we

711
00:43:58,040 --> 00:44:02,839
Speaker 2: can change this country, but it starts with me. I'll

712
00:44:02,880 --> 00:44:03,719
Speaker 2: see in part two.

713
00:44:06,239 --> 00:44:15,960
Speaker 3: Mm hmmm