1 00:00:05,720 --> 00:00:07,720 Speaker 1: Hey, you, welcome to Stuff to Blow your Mind. My 2 00:00:07,800 --> 00:00:11,160 Speaker 1: name is Robert Lamb and I'm Joe McCormick, and it's Saturday. 3 00:00:11,200 --> 00:00:13,160 Speaker 1: Time to go into the vault for a classic episode 4 00:00:13,200 --> 00:00:17,600 Speaker 1: of the show. This one comes from November of twenty nineteen. 5 00:00:17,760 --> 00:00:20,120 Speaker 1: This was published on the twenty eighth of last year, 6 00:00:20,239 --> 00:00:23,319 Speaker 1: and it is the Science of Gratitude. That's right, a 7 00:00:23,320 --> 00:00:28,240 Speaker 1: little Thanksgiving content for your what American Thanksgiving holiday season. 8 00:00:31,680 --> 00:00:33,559 Speaker 1: Welcome to Stuff to Blow Your Mind, a production of 9 00:00:33,560 --> 00:00:42,239 Speaker 1: I Heart Radios How Stuff Works. Hey, you, welcome to 10 00:00:42,240 --> 00:00:44,360 Speaker 1: Stuff to Blow your Mind. My name is Robert Lamb 11 00:00:44,640 --> 00:00:48,080 Speaker 1: and I'm Joe McCormick. And hey, Robert jam band trivia 12 00:00:48,159 --> 00:00:50,280 Speaker 1: for you. Do you know where the name of the 13 00:00:50,400 --> 00:00:54,400 Speaker 1: Grateful Dead comes from? Oh? Man, you know, I'm not 14 00:00:54,440 --> 00:00:56,880 Speaker 1: a huge dead head. I really love that that track 15 00:00:57,000 --> 00:01:00,320 Speaker 1: Dark Star, but yeah, I'd never really it a lot 16 00:01:00,360 --> 00:01:02,120 Speaker 1: of thought. I know they have the like a sort 17 00:01:02,120 --> 00:01:05,640 Speaker 1: of a mascot of like this medieval looking skeleton with 18 00:01:05,720 --> 00:01:08,600 Speaker 1: the hair and and all, and it's it's a cool name, 19 00:01:08,640 --> 00:01:10,280 Speaker 1: but I actually never gave it a lot of thought. 20 00:01:10,600 --> 00:01:13,800 Speaker 1: I didn't know until just recently I found out the answer. 21 00:01:14,200 --> 00:01:16,559 Speaker 1: The name of the band comes from when a member. 22 00:01:16,560 --> 00:01:18,400 Speaker 1: I think it was Jerry Garcia, it might have been 23 00:01:18,440 --> 00:01:23,760 Speaker 1: another member. Somebody found in an encyclopedia an entry for 24 00:01:23,920 --> 00:01:26,320 Speaker 1: a thing that was that was already an existing phrase 25 00:01:26,400 --> 00:01:29,760 Speaker 1: called the grateful dead. So what is that? Well, it 26 00:01:29,800 --> 00:01:33,720 Speaker 1: turns out that the grateful dead is an archetypal folk 27 00:01:33,800 --> 00:01:37,920 Speaker 1: tale motif that appears in lots of cultures around the world, 28 00:01:38,080 --> 00:01:40,959 Speaker 1: usually not as a story on its own, but as 29 00:01:41,080 --> 00:01:43,679 Speaker 1: like a piece of a story, a sort of like 30 00:01:43,800 --> 00:01:46,240 Speaker 1: scene in a story that shows up in tons of 31 00:01:46,280 --> 00:01:49,800 Speaker 1: different folk tale cycles. According to the late great American 32 00:01:49,800 --> 00:01:53,800 Speaker 1: folklore scholar Stith Thompson, versions of this tailor found especially 33 00:01:53,840 --> 00:01:56,640 Speaker 1: in European and Asian lore, though I think you might 34 00:01:56,680 --> 00:02:00,880 Speaker 1: find it elsewhere too. But to read from Thompson's descript quote, 35 00:02:01,440 --> 00:02:04,400 Speaker 1: in all these tales, we learn of a hero who 36 00:02:04,400 --> 00:02:07,840 Speaker 1: finds that creditors are refusing to permit the burial of 37 00:02:07,880 --> 00:02:11,440 Speaker 1: a corpse until the dead man's debts have been paid. 38 00:02:12,080 --> 00:02:15,480 Speaker 1: The hero spends his last penny to ransom the dead 39 00:02:15,480 --> 00:02:19,120 Speaker 1: man's body and to secure his burial. Later, in the 40 00:02:19,160 --> 00:02:21,720 Speaker 1: course of his adventures, the hero is joined by a 41 00:02:21,800 --> 00:02:25,880 Speaker 1: mysterious stranger who agrees to help him in all his endeavors. 42 00:02:25,919 --> 00:02:30,040 Speaker 1: The stranger is the grateful dead man. The only condition 43 00:02:30,080 --> 00:02:32,079 Speaker 1: which the dead man makes when he agrees to help 44 00:02:32,120 --> 00:02:35,040 Speaker 1: the hero is that all winnings which the latter makes 45 00:02:35,080 --> 00:02:38,720 Speaker 1: shall be equally divided. In all the stories, the hero 46 00:02:38,840 --> 00:02:42,919 Speaker 1: eventually wins a wife and the helper demands his half. 47 00:02:43,600 --> 00:02:46,480 Speaker 1: Usually the dead man interferes in time to prevent the 48 00:02:46,560 --> 00:02:50,400 Speaker 1: actual cutting in two of the woman. So multiple strange 49 00:02:50,400 --> 00:02:53,200 Speaker 1: elements there number one. Of course, it reminds me of 50 00:02:53,200 --> 00:02:56,000 Speaker 1: the like King Solomon and the Baby story, but it 51 00:02:56,040 --> 00:02:58,079 Speaker 1: also reminds me of other I mean, I think it's 52 00:02:58,080 --> 00:03:01,040 Speaker 1: extremely common to have what would you call this dynamic 53 00:03:01,280 --> 00:03:05,640 Speaker 1: folk tale motifs where someone is asked to make a 54 00:03:05,680 --> 00:03:08,360 Speaker 1: promise about what they will do with some kind of 55 00:03:08,440 --> 00:03:11,880 Speaker 1: future reward or something, but then the reward they receive 56 00:03:12,080 --> 00:03:15,480 Speaker 1: is not compatible with the promise they made. I think 57 00:03:15,520 --> 00:03:18,200 Speaker 1: of the examples in like Sir Gawain and the Green Night, 58 00:03:18,720 --> 00:03:22,280 Speaker 1: where uh the Sir Gawain in some versions of the story, 59 00:03:22,320 --> 00:03:24,840 Speaker 1: I think Sir Gawin stays with the host who they 60 00:03:24,840 --> 00:03:27,919 Speaker 1: say each day they will they will share what they 61 00:03:27,960 --> 00:03:30,120 Speaker 1: have one in the day with the other one. So 62 00:03:30,200 --> 00:03:32,560 Speaker 1: the one guy. The host goes out hunting, and he 63 00:03:32,600 --> 00:03:34,840 Speaker 1: comes back and he shares like the boar that he 64 00:03:34,880 --> 00:03:37,880 Speaker 1: caught with Sir Gawain, But Sir Gawain instead receives a 65 00:03:37,960 --> 00:03:40,760 Speaker 1: kiss from the man's wife, and so to share it 66 00:03:40,800 --> 00:03:43,800 Speaker 1: he has to kiss the man. But of course, the 67 00:03:43,800 --> 00:03:47,320 Speaker 1: final element here is that it's ultimately a story about 68 00:03:47,360 --> 00:03:51,280 Speaker 1: a kindness being repaid. It's a story about gratitude from 69 00:03:51,280 --> 00:03:54,640 Speaker 1: a ghost that somebody does a kindness that he could 70 00:03:54,640 --> 00:03:58,080 Speaker 1: not possibly expect to be repaid, and yet in some 71 00:03:58,200 --> 00:04:01,760 Speaker 1: strange and supernatural fact, and he ends up surprised because 72 00:04:01,800 --> 00:04:05,280 Speaker 1: his kindness is repaid against everything you would expect. And 73 00:04:05,320 --> 00:04:08,520 Speaker 1: in this we get into the topic of gratitude of 74 00:04:08,520 --> 00:04:12,520 Speaker 1: of thankfulness, which of course seems an obvious thing to 75 00:04:12,640 --> 00:04:16,160 Speaker 1: tackle on Thanksgiving, uh, And that's one of the reasons 76 00:04:16,160 --> 00:04:18,240 Speaker 1: we chose it. But also it is it is an 77 00:04:18,279 --> 00:04:21,119 Speaker 1: important topic. It is an important part of the human 78 00:04:21,160 --> 00:04:24,240 Speaker 1: experience and human culture, and so there's actually a lot 79 00:04:24,320 --> 00:04:26,640 Speaker 1: here to unpack. Absolutely. I mean, I would say this 80 00:04:26,720 --> 00:04:30,840 Speaker 1: is not the only folktale motif too heavily involved gratitude. 81 00:04:30,839 --> 00:04:35,920 Speaker 1: Gratitude shows up all throughout full stories, uh, like the 82 00:04:36,120 --> 00:04:40,680 Speaker 1: ungrateful receiver is a big archetype. Somebody who is ungrateful 83 00:04:40,760 --> 00:04:42,719 Speaker 1: for what has been done for them, and they, you know, 84 00:04:42,760 --> 00:04:45,599 Speaker 1: are punished or learn a lesson. And the other side 85 00:04:45,640 --> 00:04:49,360 Speaker 1: is yes, somehow seeing gratefulness turning out for the best, 86 00:04:49,520 --> 00:04:51,760 Speaker 1: You do somebody a favor and then you are repaid 87 00:04:51,880 --> 00:04:57,080 Speaker 1: and their gratitude, Uh, is it unveils like secret benefits 88 00:04:57,120 --> 00:04:59,839 Speaker 1: that you couldn't have expected. Yes, sometimes the stranger that 89 00:05:00,000 --> 00:05:02,480 Speaker 1: you are favorable to turns out to be a divine 90 00:05:02,520 --> 00:05:05,440 Speaker 1: being of some sort. Uh. There are also tons of 91 00:05:05,480 --> 00:05:08,680 Speaker 1: tales in which if if one is punished or rewarded 92 00:05:08,760 --> 00:05:14,120 Speaker 1: for either uh you know, not respecting elders or respecting 93 00:05:14,120 --> 00:05:17,200 Speaker 1: elders being rewarded for the respect. So yeah, this is 94 00:05:17,200 --> 00:05:20,120 Speaker 1: the gratitude is an important part of of global myth 95 00:05:20,160 --> 00:05:23,880 Speaker 1: making and then just continuing early a part of our storytelling. 96 00:05:24,760 --> 00:05:29,960 Speaker 1: So let's come back to American Thanksgiving though Okay, um, 97 00:05:30,520 --> 00:05:34,840 Speaker 1: all of this isn't necessarily obvious as we go through, uh, 98 00:05:34,960 --> 00:05:38,320 Speaker 1: just our day to day experience of Thanksgiving here in America, 99 00:05:38,360 --> 00:05:41,039 Speaker 1: because it can often feel like a very complicated holiday. 100 00:05:41,160 --> 00:05:43,760 Speaker 1: For instance, let me just roll through a few of 101 00:05:43,800 --> 00:05:47,440 Speaker 1: the several reasons to hate on Thanksgiving, and I'm I 102 00:05:47,480 --> 00:05:50,360 Speaker 1: am guilty of some of these, if not all. You've 103 00:05:50,400 --> 00:05:53,200 Speaker 1: clearly got to love hate relationship because you you keep 104 00:05:53,240 --> 00:05:56,240 Speaker 1: wanting to talk about Thanksgiving even though you hate it. Yeah. Well, 105 00:05:56,279 --> 00:05:59,200 Speaker 1: I mean, I I feel like if I am resistant 106 00:05:59,200 --> 00:06:02,640 Speaker 1: to something like Thanksgiving, then I should probably explore how 107 00:06:02,839 --> 00:06:05,400 Speaker 1: I feel about it more, you know, and also perhaps 108 00:06:05,480 --> 00:06:07,880 Speaker 1: feel explore the things that I feel good about. So 109 00:06:07,920 --> 00:06:10,520 Speaker 1: on one hand, Thanksgiving us what you get when Halloween 110 00:06:10,600 --> 00:06:14,760 Speaker 1: is over. Bomber. Yeah, it's it's all that transition away 111 00:06:14,839 --> 00:06:19,200 Speaker 1: from ghosts and ghouls and draculas and Frankenstein's and uh, 112 00:06:19,240 --> 00:06:22,279 Speaker 1: you know, and the other properly named literary figures that 113 00:06:22,320 --> 00:06:25,279 Speaker 1: we refer to in the general sense, and then suddenly 114 00:06:25,320 --> 00:06:29,000 Speaker 1: it's just Pilgrims and turkeys and whatnot, not everybody or 115 00:06:29,279 --> 00:06:32,320 Speaker 1: monster freaks like us. Though true, true, some may see 116 00:06:32,320 --> 00:06:35,160 Speaker 1: it as a relief. Now. Another thing is that, as 117 00:06:35,279 --> 00:06:38,839 Speaker 1: is often pointed out in comedy, it is a you know, 118 00:06:38,880 --> 00:06:41,719 Speaker 1: it's a post election obligation to hang out with family 119 00:06:41,720 --> 00:06:44,120 Speaker 1: members who you may very well not see eye to 120 00:06:44,200 --> 00:06:46,640 Speaker 1: eye on when it comes to politics. Can make things 121 00:06:46,720 --> 00:06:50,560 Speaker 1: a little awkward. Uh, you know, and if you're lucky, 122 00:06:50,600 --> 00:06:52,640 Speaker 1: it can make things awkward. Of course, can be worse 123 00:06:52,640 --> 00:06:55,360 Speaker 1: than that. Also, it is a feast, and while feasts 124 00:06:55,400 --> 00:06:57,840 Speaker 1: are a major part of seasonal celebrations around the world, 125 00:06:58,240 --> 00:07:01,440 Speaker 1: it can feel a bit ex estive in the modern age. 126 00:07:01,520 --> 00:07:04,640 Speaker 1: It can bring up mixed feelings about save the amount 127 00:07:04,680 --> 00:07:06,920 Speaker 1: of food that you are consuming and perhaps the amount 128 00:07:06,920 --> 00:07:10,440 Speaker 1: of food waste you might be producing. Also, if you've 129 00:07:10,480 --> 00:07:13,560 Speaker 1: lost loved ones of individuals are missing from the proceedings 130 00:07:13,560 --> 00:07:17,200 Speaker 1: for various reasons, you know, living or dead, or if 131 00:07:17,240 --> 00:07:20,560 Speaker 1: you yourself cannot be part of such celebrations with family 132 00:07:20,680 --> 00:07:23,600 Speaker 1: for a variety of reasons. The holiday can be bitter, sweet, 133 00:07:23,680 --> 00:07:28,120 Speaker 1: or downright depressing. Uh, and in this it's like other holidays. 134 00:07:28,160 --> 00:07:31,400 Speaker 1: This is absolutely true, and I think this this contributed 135 00:07:31,560 --> 00:07:36,560 Speaker 1: to the widely circulated but false facts that suicide skyrocket 136 00:07:36,920 --> 00:07:39,800 Speaker 1: around uh, Thanksgiving and Christmas. We looked into that on 137 00:07:39,840 --> 00:07:41,680 Speaker 1: an episode one time and found that it was not 138 00:07:41,760 --> 00:07:43,960 Speaker 1: in fact true, that they were not highest around the 139 00:07:43,960 --> 00:07:46,000 Speaker 1: winter months. I think they were actually highest somewhere in 140 00:07:46,000 --> 00:07:49,720 Speaker 1: the spring. Yeah, yeah, I remember that. Another thing about 141 00:07:50,080 --> 00:07:53,160 Speaker 1: Thanksgiving in America is that the pilgrim and Native American 142 00:07:53,200 --> 00:07:57,040 Speaker 1: aspects of the holidays, trappings and sometimes decorations which many 143 00:07:57,080 --> 00:08:00,720 Speaker 1: of us grew up with. They can feel other off putting. 144 00:08:00,760 --> 00:08:03,720 Speaker 1: The more you realize about the exploitation of First Nations 145 00:08:03,760 --> 00:08:07,720 Speaker 1: people and or the religious views of the pilgrims one 146 00:08:07,720 --> 00:08:09,960 Speaker 1: of those. The more you know, the more uh you 147 00:08:09,960 --> 00:08:13,160 Speaker 1: know at least awkward it can feel. And then, of course, 148 00:08:13,400 --> 00:08:16,040 Speaker 1: the Thanksgiving parade is not quite as fun as it 149 00:08:16,040 --> 00:08:18,400 Speaker 1: seemed when you were seven. It never seemed fun. You 150 00:08:18,680 --> 00:08:22,480 Speaker 1: never got into that at all. No, I like big balloons, 151 00:08:22,520 --> 00:08:28,120 Speaker 1: but the parade aspects, it seemed over long and tedious. Yeah, yeah, yeah, 152 00:08:28,120 --> 00:08:30,240 Speaker 1: I guess so. But I was down for just watching 153 00:08:30,240 --> 00:08:33,480 Speaker 1: any television at that age. So okay, Now, I didn't 154 00:08:33,480 --> 00:08:35,920 Speaker 1: mean to reign on your your parade, literally no, no, 155 00:08:36,040 --> 00:08:39,400 Speaker 1: Because now I don't watch it nowadays, I'm really not 156 00:08:39,480 --> 00:08:41,320 Speaker 1: even tempted to. But when I was a child, at 157 00:08:41,360 --> 00:08:44,520 Speaker 1: one point, it was big fun. On the positive side, though, 158 00:08:44,559 --> 00:08:47,240 Speaker 1: depending on your own personal experience in situation, perhaps you 159 00:08:47,240 --> 00:08:49,720 Speaker 1: can attest to finding some or all of the following 160 00:08:49,760 --> 00:08:54,360 Speaker 1: aspects of American Thanksgiving fulfilling. First of all, American football. 161 00:08:54,520 --> 00:08:56,240 Speaker 1: It's not my thing, but I know a lot of 162 00:08:56,240 --> 00:08:59,960 Speaker 1: people love it, and Thanksgiving is a time to watch it. Obsessed. 163 00:09:00,360 --> 00:09:04,080 Speaker 1: Somebody's thing, now something it is my thing. The Mystery 164 00:09:04,080 --> 00:09:07,800 Speaker 1: Science Theater three thousand Turkey Day Marathon. Hey now we're cooking. Yeah, 165 00:09:07,880 --> 00:09:10,280 Speaker 1: that that was and still it was one of my favorites. 166 00:09:10,280 --> 00:09:13,040 Speaker 1: It doesn't feel like Thanksgiving unless I'm watching some sort 167 00:09:13,080 --> 00:09:16,680 Speaker 1: of a riff movie. Generally it's Jack Frost. Oh, that's 168 00:09:16,679 --> 00:09:18,880 Speaker 1: a really good one. That's the one with the like 169 00:09:18,920 --> 00:09:23,439 Speaker 1: the Russian fairy tale and I guess room. Yeah, and 170 00:09:23,480 --> 00:09:26,839 Speaker 1: they're they're actually some perhaps some examples of gratitude playing 171 00:09:26,880 --> 00:09:29,640 Speaker 1: into the the traditional folk tales that are brought to 172 00:09:29,679 --> 00:09:32,120 Speaker 1: cinematic life in that film. Oh yeah, early on then 173 00:09:32,160 --> 00:09:34,720 Speaker 1: the story isn't Jack or not Jack? The boy in 174 00:09:34,760 --> 00:09:39,240 Speaker 1: the story he's he's quite ungrateful, entitled right, yeah, and 175 00:09:39,240 --> 00:09:42,600 Speaker 1: then he's taught a lesson by father Mushroom. Let's see 176 00:09:42,640 --> 00:09:46,840 Speaker 1: other other things. Perhaps they're positive aspects of family gatherings. 177 00:09:46,840 --> 00:09:49,319 Speaker 1: A family gathering is a family gathering, um, and it 178 00:09:49,360 --> 00:09:52,680 Speaker 1: can be quite joyful. Uh, there's nostalgia wound up in 179 00:09:52,679 --> 00:09:55,800 Speaker 1: the practice as well. Of course. Also, perhaps you really 180 00:09:55,840 --> 00:09:59,480 Speaker 1: do enjoy the food. I mean, people are gonna vary 181 00:09:59,480 --> 00:10:02,839 Speaker 1: on thanks Giving food, but get a little jab in 182 00:10:02,880 --> 00:10:05,440 Speaker 1: there for people who hate food. Well, no, I don't 183 00:10:05,440 --> 00:10:09,840 Speaker 1: hate food, but Thanksgiving dishes are usually not my absolute 184 00:10:09,920 --> 00:10:13,080 Speaker 1: favorite dishes. Oh, I see the style of Thanksgiving food 185 00:10:13,120 --> 00:10:16,280 Speaker 1: as traditionally prepared. Yet, but some people that might be 186 00:10:16,320 --> 00:10:19,000 Speaker 1: your thing and is so you know, go for it, 187 00:10:19,160 --> 00:10:21,240 Speaker 1: you know. I am firmly of the opinion that people 188 00:10:21,240 --> 00:10:24,880 Speaker 1: should not feel compelled to eat certain foods because it 189 00:10:24,960 --> 00:10:27,280 Speaker 1: is a certain holiday. If it's the fourth of July 190 00:10:27,400 --> 00:10:29,160 Speaker 1: and you're hanging out by the water, but you don't 191 00:10:29,200 --> 00:10:32,080 Speaker 1: want to eat burgers and hot dogs and barbecue, don't 192 00:10:32,080 --> 00:10:34,240 Speaker 1: eat burgers. How do you eat whatever you want eat 193 00:10:34,360 --> 00:10:37,720 Speaker 1: on Thanksgiving? I am I strongly believe people should have 194 00:10:38,160 --> 00:10:42,040 Speaker 1: kim che centric feasts. I love that idea and really 195 00:10:42,080 --> 00:10:44,319 Speaker 1: that's that gets to my next point is that you 196 00:10:44,360 --> 00:10:47,400 Speaker 1: may look forward to Thanksgiving because you've created your own ritual. 197 00:10:47,520 --> 00:10:50,240 Speaker 1: You have created something new, something fresh that you share 198 00:10:50,280 --> 00:10:54,280 Speaker 1: with family and or friends, that that means something more 199 00:10:54,320 --> 00:10:57,040 Speaker 1: to you than some of these more you know, traditional 200 00:10:57,080 --> 00:10:59,920 Speaker 1: tropes of the season. But I think that the vast 201 00:11:00,400 --> 00:11:03,319 Speaker 1: the majority of us, wherever you fall in on these 202 00:11:03,400 --> 00:11:06,720 Speaker 1: various points, you can probably agree on one thing, surely, 203 00:11:06,920 --> 00:11:13,320 Speaker 1: thankfulness itself. Gratitude itself is a useful exercise. Well, I mean, 204 00:11:13,640 --> 00:11:15,400 Speaker 1: I think a lot of people might agree on that 205 00:11:15,440 --> 00:11:19,960 Speaker 1: in principle, but then not really agree on it in practice. Well. Yes, 206 00:11:20,040 --> 00:11:22,320 Speaker 1: so it's one thing to think it one thing to 207 00:11:22,440 --> 00:11:25,520 Speaker 1: another to act on it. Uh, you know, the act 208 00:11:25,640 --> 00:11:27,680 Speaker 1: or even thought of being thankful though for what you 209 00:11:27,720 --> 00:11:30,160 Speaker 1: have in life, no matter how small, no matter how 210 00:11:30,200 --> 00:11:33,199 Speaker 1: cruel fate may seem. At times, there is I think 211 00:11:33,440 --> 00:11:37,080 Speaker 1: generally an idea that this is good, this is beneficial, 212 00:11:37,320 --> 00:11:41,800 Speaker 1: and if somebody is arguing something contrary to that, they're 213 00:11:41,840 --> 00:11:43,760 Speaker 1: probably doing it to get a rise out of you. 214 00:11:44,400 --> 00:11:47,400 Speaker 1: With you know, some exceptions, I'm sure. So we're actually 215 00:11:47,400 --> 00:11:50,880 Speaker 1: going to be talking about gratitude and thankfulness today, right. 216 00:11:51,800 --> 00:11:55,880 Speaker 1: I was thinking about how okay this subject might at 217 00:11:55,920 --> 00:11:58,560 Speaker 1: first glance, seemed kind of quaint compared to like the 218 00:11:58,559 --> 00:12:03,520 Speaker 1: grotesque evolutionary realities and strange frontiers of understanding that we 219 00:12:03,600 --> 00:12:06,120 Speaker 1: often like to explore on the show. But I think 220 00:12:06,120 --> 00:12:08,960 Speaker 1: this kind of research, by which I mean investigation of 221 00:12:09,000 --> 00:12:14,280 Speaker 1: like fundamental positive emotional states, is extremely important. It's actually 222 00:12:14,400 --> 00:12:18,000 Speaker 1: highly relevant as a scientific frontier because whatever you may 223 00:12:18,120 --> 00:12:21,200 Speaker 1: think you know or whatever you think is obvious about 224 00:12:21,240 --> 00:12:23,320 Speaker 1: how to live a good life, just look at the 225 00:12:23,320 --> 00:12:27,240 Speaker 1: ways we actually live and in practice humans are clearly 226 00:12:27,280 --> 00:12:29,800 Speaker 1: not in agreement about how to live a good life, 227 00:12:29,840 --> 00:12:32,520 Speaker 1: and like, what are the correct emotional states to seek 228 00:12:32,559 --> 00:12:35,439 Speaker 1: and how to seek them? In practice, we don't always 229 00:12:35,440 --> 00:12:38,760 Speaker 1: have reliable ways of orienting our mental and emotional lives 230 00:12:38,760 --> 00:12:42,040 Speaker 1: to the maximum benefit of ourselves and others. So I 231 00:12:42,080 --> 00:12:44,840 Speaker 1: think this kind of thing, the study of positive emotions 232 00:12:45,120 --> 00:12:49,880 Speaker 1: and positive social interactions, is actually a crucial socially relevant 233 00:12:49,920 --> 00:12:53,480 Speaker 1: psychological frontier and a workshop for the tools for a 234 00:12:53,480 --> 00:12:56,480 Speaker 1: better life. Absolutely, I would agree. And another thing I 235 00:12:56,520 --> 00:12:59,720 Speaker 1: think is that it's important to look at the science 236 00:12:59,720 --> 00:13:03,040 Speaker 1: about on subjects like this, because I would say, this 237 00:13:03,120 --> 00:13:07,120 Speaker 1: kind of stuff is usually the domain of things like 238 00:13:07,480 --> 00:13:12,319 Speaker 1: religion and common sense. You know, positive interactions and positive emotions, 239 00:13:12,520 --> 00:13:14,400 Speaker 1: and that's all well and good to deal with it 240 00:13:14,440 --> 00:13:16,360 Speaker 1: and in a religious way or just kind of deal 241 00:13:16,400 --> 00:13:18,680 Speaker 1: with it at a you know, gut feeling way, but 242 00:13:18,760 --> 00:13:21,640 Speaker 1: it's worth bringing a critical scientific lens to figure out 243 00:13:21,679 --> 00:13:23,800 Speaker 1: what's actually going on with these emotions, what are their 244 00:13:23,800 --> 00:13:27,880 Speaker 1: biological roots, uh, what are the best ways to trigger 245 00:13:27,920 --> 00:13:30,040 Speaker 1: and sustain them, like how do they fit into our 246 00:13:30,080 --> 00:13:32,800 Speaker 1: lives and how can we drive them to the benefit 247 00:13:32,800 --> 00:13:35,200 Speaker 1: of humanity. Yeah, and and hopefully all of this will 248 00:13:35,240 --> 00:13:37,200 Speaker 1: be just a good exercise for everyone in general, because 249 00:13:37,240 --> 00:13:40,240 Speaker 1: I know from from personal experience, it's entirely possible to 250 00:13:40,280 --> 00:13:45,200 Speaker 1: go through an entire Thanksgiving holiday without actually engaging in 251 00:13:45,360 --> 00:13:48,559 Speaker 1: the experience of gratitude and thoughts or acts of gratitude. 252 00:13:48,760 --> 00:13:51,880 Speaker 1: So maybe this will force all of us to to 253 00:13:52,000 --> 00:13:55,040 Speaker 1: rethink what gratitude is and why we seemingly have a 254 00:13:55,040 --> 00:13:58,839 Speaker 1: holiday that's all about reminding us to be thankful, even 255 00:13:58,920 --> 00:14:02,080 Speaker 1: if we uh don't always actually act on that. So 256 00:14:02,120 --> 00:14:05,120 Speaker 1: first of all, let's just start with under the origins 257 00:14:05,160 --> 00:14:07,040 Speaker 1: of gratitude, getting down to the you know, the brass 258 00:14:07,080 --> 00:14:09,840 Speaker 1: tacks of the matter. We'll start with the old old 259 00:14:09,880 --> 00:14:14,000 Speaker 1: Webster's definition gratitude is a state of being grateful. That's 260 00:14:14,040 --> 00:14:16,280 Speaker 1: not very helpful, all right, We'll go deeper, and to 261 00:14:16,360 --> 00:14:21,560 Speaker 1: be grateful is to be appreciative of benefits received, expressing gratitude, 262 00:14:21,600 --> 00:14:26,320 Speaker 1: affording pleasure or contentment or pleasing by reason of comfort 263 00:14:26,360 --> 00:14:31,680 Speaker 1: supplied or discomfort alleviated. So it is being aware of 264 00:14:31,720 --> 00:14:36,200 Speaker 1: your blessings, being aware of benefits received, and more than 265 00:14:36,280 --> 00:14:40,400 Speaker 1: just acknowledging that they exist, being appreciative of them. So 266 00:14:40,560 --> 00:14:44,560 Speaker 1: it's like a positive emotion that coincides with acknowledging what 267 00:14:44,720 --> 00:14:48,320 Speaker 1: has gone well right now and considering all of this, 268 00:14:48,720 --> 00:14:51,400 Speaker 1: and certainly more so if you are already bringing in 269 00:14:51,680 --> 00:14:55,560 Speaker 1: religious connotations. We touched on the fact that sometimes gratitude 270 00:14:55,680 --> 00:14:59,720 Speaker 1: is shall we say, more cosmic. For instance, I can 271 00:14:59,720 --> 00:15:01,880 Speaker 1: true we say that I'm thankful to have been born 272 00:15:01,960 --> 00:15:05,040 Speaker 1: in a time of such scientific advancements, uh, you know, 273 00:15:05,080 --> 00:15:08,960 Speaker 1: such relative global peace and personal freedom, and I have 274 00:15:08,960 --> 00:15:11,080 Speaker 1: can come back to the old phil Oaks folk song 275 00:15:11,240 --> 00:15:15,400 Speaker 1: They're but for Fortune that talks about all these terrible 276 00:15:15,440 --> 00:15:17,520 Speaker 1: things and saying, well, they're but for fortune. Go you 277 00:15:17,640 --> 00:15:20,440 Speaker 1: or I. Yeah. And and as much as there, of 278 00:15:20,480 --> 00:15:23,640 Speaker 1: course still is always lots of things wrong in the world, 279 00:15:24,120 --> 00:15:26,800 Speaker 1: you can appreciate the things that have gone right. I mean, 280 00:15:26,840 --> 00:15:29,760 Speaker 1: like whatever else mad is going on, you can say, wow, 281 00:15:29,880 --> 00:15:34,280 Speaker 1: I was able to receive vaccines, you know exactly, But 282 00:15:34,320 --> 00:15:36,000 Speaker 1: a lot of these are sort of by luck of 283 00:15:36,040 --> 00:15:38,880 Speaker 1: the universe. I exist at all, am conscious of my 284 00:15:39,000 --> 00:15:42,000 Speaker 1: existence so at all, or you know, despite a fair 285 00:15:42,000 --> 00:15:44,360 Speaker 1: amount of nitpicking and even some you know, major issues 286 00:15:44,360 --> 00:15:46,800 Speaker 1: with the state of world or even reality itself. We 287 00:15:46,840 --> 00:15:49,520 Speaker 1: can say, well I am fortunate, right, So that's that's 288 00:15:49,640 --> 00:15:52,840 Speaker 1: very you know, cosmic gratitude. But then there's the idea 289 00:15:52,840 --> 00:15:56,600 Speaker 1: of being grateful to someone or to something, and and 290 00:15:56,680 --> 00:15:59,040 Speaker 1: this is important as well, and it can take many forms. 291 00:15:59,320 --> 00:16:02,040 Speaker 1: Perhaps you're grateful to your partner for all they do 292 00:16:02,160 --> 00:16:04,360 Speaker 1: and for their love. Perhaps you are grateful to your 293 00:16:04,400 --> 00:16:07,440 Speaker 1: parents for their love and support. Perhaps you're grateful to 294 00:16:07,560 --> 00:16:10,440 Speaker 1: a friend or even a stranger who did you a favor. 295 00:16:10,440 --> 00:16:13,200 Speaker 1: Perhaps you're grateful to an authority figure in your life, 296 00:16:13,240 --> 00:16:16,120 Speaker 1: a boss, a public figure who help you in some way, 297 00:16:16,120 --> 00:16:18,400 Speaker 1: an artist who created something that gave you joy, or 298 00:16:18,440 --> 00:16:21,920 Speaker 1: a king um, you know. And indeed, perhaps you're you're 299 00:16:22,000 --> 00:16:24,960 Speaker 1: grateful to a deity for their perceived role in any 300 00:16:25,000 --> 00:16:28,640 Speaker 1: of these everyday blessings or the larger cosmic blessings that 301 00:16:28,760 --> 00:16:32,160 Speaker 1: we mentioned already. Yeah, this is an interesting distinction. Uh, 302 00:16:32,360 --> 00:16:35,840 Speaker 1: maybe looking at social gratitude versus what you're calling like 303 00:16:35,960 --> 00:16:42,120 Speaker 1: cosmic gratitude, because I believe the biological function of gratitude 304 00:16:42,160 --> 00:16:46,160 Speaker 1: as an emotion in the primate brain is probably primarily 305 00:16:46,320 --> 00:16:50,640 Speaker 1: social right. It's a motivating emotion that encourages bonding and 306 00:16:50,680 --> 00:16:55,440 Speaker 1: reciprocal cooperation between animals. But in humans, it's clear that 307 00:16:55,440 --> 00:16:58,400 Speaker 1: that it can escape the bonds of its original social 308 00:16:58,440 --> 00:17:02,160 Speaker 1: context and exist without an object. Right. You can be 309 00:17:02,240 --> 00:17:05,480 Speaker 1: grateful but not to any person in particular, like you're 310 00:17:05,480 --> 00:17:09,160 Speaker 1: talking about with this cosmic gratefulness, or exist in relationship 311 00:17:09,240 --> 00:17:12,000 Speaker 1: to things. Maybe there is an object you're grateful to, 312 00:17:12,040 --> 00:17:14,920 Speaker 1: but it's not another animal or another person. It can 313 00:17:15,000 --> 00:17:18,520 Speaker 1: just be a situation. I find that really interesting. Uh, 314 00:17:18,560 --> 00:17:20,600 Speaker 1: and I think there are plenty of parallels with other 315 00:17:20,640 --> 00:17:25,199 Speaker 1: emotions that have escaped to their original social significance in 316 00:17:25,240 --> 00:17:28,280 Speaker 1: an animal context. You might think of resentment in the 317 00:17:28,280 --> 00:17:31,360 Speaker 1: negative side. Resentment, I think also is primarily a social 318 00:17:31,359 --> 00:17:35,879 Speaker 1: emotion as biological functions in you know, regulating social groups 319 00:17:35,880 --> 00:17:38,639 Speaker 1: and group dynamics. But it's also possible for people to 320 00:17:38,720 --> 00:17:41,720 Speaker 1: feel resentment towards no one in particular, just sort of 321 00:17:41,800 --> 00:17:45,480 Speaker 1: rather toward life for towards general situations. Right. Like So, 322 00:17:45,560 --> 00:17:48,080 Speaker 1: for instance, if if I have back pain, I can 323 00:17:48,160 --> 00:17:51,879 Speaker 1: resent my job and or indoor my boss, because you know, 324 00:17:51,920 --> 00:17:54,240 Speaker 1: if that job somehow played into the injuring my back, 325 00:17:54,840 --> 00:17:56,760 Speaker 1: If I believe in a deity. I can resent my 326 00:17:56,800 --> 00:18:00,399 Speaker 1: ideity or you know whatever, or the devil or whoever, 327 00:18:00,680 --> 00:18:03,160 Speaker 1: for their role in making my back hurt or allowing 328 00:18:03,160 --> 00:18:05,879 Speaker 1: it to hurt in the first place. Or I can, 329 00:18:05,960 --> 00:18:09,840 Speaker 1: for instance, be resentful at natural selection in the stint 330 00:18:09,920 --> 00:18:13,480 Speaker 1: of human biology that that frequently enables back penning to 331 00:18:13,520 --> 00:18:16,679 Speaker 1: exist at all. You can just have resentfulness without an 332 00:18:16,720 --> 00:18:19,119 Speaker 1: object like and nobody to be mad at here. But 333 00:18:19,160 --> 00:18:21,280 Speaker 1: I'm so resentful. Yeah, And I think the same is 334 00:18:21,320 --> 00:18:24,520 Speaker 1: clearly true of gratitude. I entirely agree with this idea 335 00:18:24,560 --> 00:18:27,960 Speaker 1: of this cosmic feeling of gratitude. And it's funny how 336 00:18:28,000 --> 00:18:31,240 Speaker 1: that kind of thing complicates our picture of of gratitude 337 00:18:31,320 --> 00:18:34,520 Speaker 1: far beyond even the kind you see like in the 338 00:18:34,840 --> 00:18:39,320 Speaker 1: in the folk tales where most often gratitude manifests as like, uh, 339 00:18:39,359 --> 00:18:42,399 Speaker 1: you know, a sort of a debt ode to someone. 340 00:18:42,480 --> 00:18:44,600 Speaker 1: Someone has done something nice for you, and you're going 341 00:18:44,640 --> 00:18:47,720 Speaker 1: to find a way to pay them back. Yeah, that's right, 342 00:18:47,760 --> 00:18:50,560 Speaker 1: Because if there is an other involved in your gratitude, 343 00:18:50,560 --> 00:18:53,879 Speaker 1: be it an actual human person or a perceived deity, 344 00:18:53,960 --> 00:18:56,800 Speaker 1: then there may be well this feeling of indebtedness. There 345 00:18:56,880 --> 00:18:59,160 Speaker 1: is a bond there is something that needs to be 346 00:18:59,200 --> 00:19:02,159 Speaker 1: repaid and in form or another. And then there's clearly 347 00:19:02,200 --> 00:19:06,920 Speaker 1: overlap here between indebtedness and gratitude. Uh. And it really 348 00:19:07,000 --> 00:19:09,240 Speaker 1: depends on who you talk to who's doing the arguing. 349 00:19:09,520 --> 00:19:12,520 Speaker 1: Some say that they are essentially equivalent. Others, however, argued 350 00:19:12,560 --> 00:19:16,480 Speaker 1: that we're talking about two distinct emotional states. I was 351 00:19:16,520 --> 00:19:19,640 Speaker 1: looking at some various sources on this. In the Debt 352 00:19:19,680 --> 00:19:23,800 Speaker 1: of Gratitude Disassociating Gratitude and Indebtedness by Watkins at All, 353 00:19:23,840 --> 00:19:26,600 Speaker 1: published in Cognition and Emotion in two thousand and six, 354 00:19:26,840 --> 00:19:30,800 Speaker 1: the researchers carried out a pair of exercises insurmised that quote, 355 00:19:30,960 --> 00:19:33,879 Speaker 1: the debt of gratitude is internally generated and is not 356 00:19:33,960 --> 00:19:37,640 Speaker 1: analogous to an economic form of indebtedness. Okay, so they 357 00:19:37,680 --> 00:19:40,160 Speaker 1: come down on the side of it, these two things 358 00:19:40,160 --> 00:19:43,680 Speaker 1: being not equivalent. Another study I was looking at for 359 00:19:43,840 --> 00:19:47,159 Speaker 1: this one from Matthews and green Um looking at Me 360 00:19:47,320 --> 00:19:51,639 Speaker 1: Appreciating You Self focused attention distinguishes between gratitude and indebtedness. 361 00:19:51,680 --> 00:19:54,399 Speaker 1: This was also an Incognition and Emotion but from two 362 00:19:54,440 --> 00:19:57,479 Speaker 1: thousand eight. In this the researchers found that quote, highly 363 00:19:57,520 --> 00:20:02,360 Speaker 1: self focused individuals recalled in priest indebtedness, but not gratitude 364 00:20:02,359 --> 00:20:05,880 Speaker 1: towards a benefactor. Relative to those in the control condition, 365 00:20:06,240 --> 00:20:10,199 Speaker 1: Self focused individuals also felt less commitment and closeness to 366 00:20:10,280 --> 00:20:14,600 Speaker 1: the benefactor. So if I'm understanding this correctly, um, and indeed, 367 00:20:14,600 --> 00:20:17,520 Speaker 1: these are all just arguments on the backup two experiments, 368 00:20:17,560 --> 00:20:21,760 Speaker 1: they're not gospel. Uh. Concerning gratitude, indebtedness comes down comes 369 00:20:21,760 --> 00:20:25,320 Speaker 1: into play more when we're considering ourselves as players within 370 00:20:25,359 --> 00:20:28,680 Speaker 1: a social system. Well, yeah, I mean, I can imagine, 371 00:20:28,720 --> 00:20:31,280 Speaker 1: for example, it seems perfectly plausible that you could have 372 00:20:31,359 --> 00:20:35,560 Speaker 1: person a Bob who is really into paying back what 373 00:20:35,680 --> 00:20:37,840 Speaker 1: he owes people. He borrows five dollars, He's going to 374 00:20:37,920 --> 00:20:41,320 Speaker 1: pay you back five dollars. Bobs, right, exactly, He always 375 00:20:41,359 --> 00:20:44,359 Speaker 1: pays his debts. But he might not be a person 376 00:20:44,400 --> 00:20:47,119 Speaker 1: in which you recognize much of this emotion that we 377 00:20:47,240 --> 00:20:51,040 Speaker 1: call gratitude. Meanwhile, you could have person b You could 378 00:20:51,040 --> 00:20:53,680 Speaker 1: have Jeff over here, who maybe is kind of flaky 379 00:20:53,680 --> 00:20:56,640 Speaker 1: about paying back debts owed and doesn't keep a very 380 00:20:56,680 --> 00:20:59,280 Speaker 1: clean ledger that way, doesn't settle all these debts, but 381 00:20:59,520 --> 00:21:02,280 Speaker 1: shows more of the emotion we think of his gratitude 382 00:21:02,280 --> 00:21:04,440 Speaker 1: that that makes sense to me, and I can very 383 00:21:04,480 --> 00:21:07,600 Speaker 1: easily see those things being disconnected from one another in 384 00:21:07,640 --> 00:21:10,800 Speaker 1: social scenarios. Now here's another paper. I was looking at 385 00:21:10,800 --> 00:21:13,640 Speaker 1: a two thousand seven paper in Motivation and Emotion from 386 00:21:13,760 --> 00:21:17,680 Speaker 1: joe En Saying titled the Effects of Helper Intention on 387 00:21:17,800 --> 00:21:21,480 Speaker 1: Gratitude and Indebtedness. And this also experimented with the distinction 388 00:21:21,560 --> 00:21:25,199 Speaker 1: and explore the effects of helper intention on reactions to 389 00:21:25,240 --> 00:21:27,720 Speaker 1: a favor. And basically, the subjects were asked to think 390 00:21:27,720 --> 00:21:32,120 Speaker 1: about times they did something nice, either within an ulterior 391 00:21:32,200 --> 00:21:35,040 Speaker 1: motive or as an act of just pure benevolence and quote, 392 00:21:35,040 --> 00:21:40,200 Speaker 1: participants fell significantly more grateful when the helper had benevolent intentions. 393 00:21:40,480 --> 00:21:42,440 Speaker 1: So a lot of it would seem to come down 394 00:21:42,480 --> 00:21:45,439 Speaker 1: to either the express nature of the act and or 395 00:21:45,480 --> 00:21:48,920 Speaker 1: the individual's perception of it. So you could have people 396 00:21:48,960 --> 00:21:52,000 Speaker 1: who feel thankful because, you know, the stranger gave me 397 00:21:52,040 --> 00:21:54,800 Speaker 1: a cold water bottle just out of kindness or uh, 398 00:21:54,800 --> 00:21:56,959 Speaker 1: you know um. Or they could say, oh, the bellman 399 00:21:57,040 --> 00:21:59,480 Speaker 1: was so nice to bring my luggage to my hotel room, 400 00:22:00,200 --> 00:22:02,480 Speaker 1: and they're grateful, not realizing they were supposed to tip 401 00:22:02,520 --> 00:22:05,920 Speaker 1: that individual. Right, It's all about you know, your perception. 402 00:22:06,280 --> 00:22:09,120 Speaker 1: You know, likewise, you could feel indebted because your friend 403 00:22:09,160 --> 00:22:10,840 Speaker 1: helped you move and you know that they are going 404 00:22:10,880 --> 00:22:14,000 Speaker 1: to move next week, or you know, you could be 405 00:22:14,040 --> 00:22:16,280 Speaker 1: something like, oh, that stranger gave me a bottle of water, 406 00:22:16,520 --> 00:22:18,600 Speaker 1: probably because they're going to try to sell me something. 407 00:22:18,640 --> 00:22:20,240 Speaker 1: I'm gonna have to stand here and listen to them, 408 00:22:20,400 --> 00:22:22,199 Speaker 1: you know, or something like that. So you could you 409 00:22:22,240 --> 00:22:26,360 Speaker 1: could read or potentially misread any situation and lean more 410 00:22:26,440 --> 00:22:29,840 Speaker 1: towards gratitude or indebtedness. Okay, we totally know if you've 411 00:22:29,840 --> 00:22:33,240 Speaker 1: watched a mob movie or the Pranos, that there are 412 00:22:34,240 --> 00:22:38,120 Speaker 1: gifts that are purely menacing that that you can like 413 00:22:38,880 --> 00:22:41,800 Speaker 1: give somebody a gift or give somebody cash or something 414 00:22:41,840 --> 00:22:44,000 Speaker 1: like that, and the goal is not to do something 415 00:22:44,080 --> 00:22:46,639 Speaker 1: nice for them. It is to to scare them, to 416 00:22:46,800 --> 00:22:49,560 Speaker 1: signal to them that they are indebted to you, and 417 00:22:49,600 --> 00:22:52,200 Speaker 1: they can't you know, they can't turn this down. It's 418 00:22:52,280 --> 00:22:55,080 Speaker 1: more of a kind of dominance move when someone in 419 00:22:55,119 --> 00:22:58,600 Speaker 1: a position of power um asked for a favor, that 420 00:22:58,720 --> 00:23:01,840 Speaker 1: sort of thing. It's entirely friend situation than if a 421 00:23:01,920 --> 00:23:04,600 Speaker 1: normal person just asks, you know, a friend or a 422 00:23:04,680 --> 00:23:07,000 Speaker 1: family member for a favor. Well, but But in this case, 423 00:23:07,000 --> 00:23:08,760 Speaker 1: what I was talking about is if a person in 424 00:23:08,840 --> 00:23:12,399 Speaker 1: power does you a favor, but you know, you're not 425 00:23:12,400 --> 00:23:14,720 Speaker 1: going to feel gratitude if you don't think that the 426 00:23:14,760 --> 00:23:17,720 Speaker 1: favor was actually done out of kindness, if you think 427 00:23:17,720 --> 00:23:19,560 Speaker 1: the favor was done in some way to try to 428 00:23:19,640 --> 00:23:22,480 Speaker 1: dominate you or make a point to you. Yes. Now, 429 00:23:22,520 --> 00:23:25,440 Speaker 1: both of these ideas, though no matter how connected they are, 430 00:23:25,600 --> 00:23:28,800 Speaker 1: touch on two things that are typically stressed in human cultures. 431 00:23:28,960 --> 00:23:31,960 Speaker 1: You should repay your debts, and you should show gratitude, 432 00:23:32,000 --> 00:23:35,040 Speaker 1: either in general to a deity or deities and or 433 00:23:35,080 --> 00:23:37,880 Speaker 1: two individuals. All Right, it's time to take a quick break, 434 00:23:37,880 --> 00:23:41,400 Speaker 1: but we'll be right back to discuss some research on gratitude. 435 00:23:42,960 --> 00:23:47,880 Speaker 1: Thank alright, we're back. So in considering, you know, cultural 436 00:23:47,920 --> 00:23:52,400 Speaker 1: attitudes towards gratitude and who should show gratitude towards, one 437 00:23:52,440 --> 00:23:55,040 Speaker 1: of the big ones is, of course, gratitude towards parents 438 00:23:55,080 --> 00:23:57,800 Speaker 1: and family members. That kind of makes sense. I mean, 439 00:23:58,040 --> 00:24:00,800 Speaker 1: the entire act of raising a child is doing a 440 00:24:00,800 --> 00:24:04,240 Speaker 1: lot of favors that are not immediately repaid, right, and 441 00:24:04,240 --> 00:24:07,800 Speaker 1: and also you engage in them generally because you don't 442 00:24:07,840 --> 00:24:11,639 Speaker 1: expect them to be repaid. Were the lecture. Yeah, but 443 00:24:11,640 --> 00:24:15,919 Speaker 1: but this is important business in human culture. Uh. And 444 00:24:15,960 --> 00:24:18,640 Speaker 1: in various cultures we see different models of it. For instance, 445 00:24:18,800 --> 00:24:23,680 Speaker 1: in Chinese traditions there's the concept of filial p d 446 00:24:24,040 --> 00:24:28,120 Speaker 1: or shall, and it is enormously important and in many 447 00:24:28,119 --> 00:24:31,680 Speaker 1: Eastern cultures as well. It's a concept grounded in Dallast 448 00:24:31,680 --> 00:24:35,480 Speaker 1: philosophy Confucian family values, and it concerns the undying nature 449 00:24:35,520 --> 00:24:38,520 Speaker 1: of the human soul. The dead live on in the afterlife. 450 00:24:38,520 --> 00:24:42,199 Speaker 1: It also entails continue efforts to not only honor to 451 00:24:42,200 --> 00:24:44,360 Speaker 1: see family members, but to care for them, to tend 452 00:24:44,359 --> 00:24:47,600 Speaker 1: to their desires, and even in some models curry favor 453 00:24:47,680 --> 00:24:51,040 Speaker 1: in order to avoid catastrophe, to maintain balance and happiness 454 00:24:51,040 --> 00:24:54,280 Speaker 1: for the living and for the dead. Um. You know, 455 00:24:54,320 --> 00:24:58,399 Speaker 1: it's a continued spirit lineage for a given family. But 456 00:24:58,480 --> 00:25:01,160 Speaker 1: we also see the basic form of this elsewhere as well. 457 00:25:01,200 --> 00:25:04,160 Speaker 1: A certain amount of respect and devotion is old to elders, 458 00:25:04,160 --> 00:25:07,000 Speaker 1: particularly one's own elders, and we see shades of this 459 00:25:07,040 --> 00:25:09,600 Speaker 1: and other cultures. The Greeks and Romans put a great 460 00:25:09,600 --> 00:25:12,720 Speaker 1: deal of emphasis on gratefulness to one's parents and failure 461 00:25:12,720 --> 00:25:16,600 Speaker 1: to honor this was considered not mere ingratitude, but impeity. 462 00:25:17,080 --> 00:25:19,159 Speaker 1: Uh so we're talking, you know, the dire breach of 463 00:25:19,160 --> 00:25:21,399 Speaker 1: a bond that is often attributed to that between a 464 00:25:21,480 --> 00:25:24,760 Speaker 1: more wine a god. And of course one is reminded 465 00:25:24,800 --> 00:25:27,960 Speaker 1: of the line from King Lear right, how sharper it 466 00:25:28,119 --> 00:25:30,879 Speaker 1: is than a serpent's tooth to have an ungrateful child. 467 00:25:31,240 --> 00:25:35,760 Speaker 1: I mean the serpent's tooth doesn't make noise. Yeah, No, 468 00:25:36,920 --> 00:25:39,840 Speaker 1: I mean that is like, what why is it? I mean, 469 00:25:39,880 --> 00:25:42,880 Speaker 1: I don't think it's just like our personal pet peeves 470 00:25:42,920 --> 00:25:46,119 Speaker 1: like it is a widely recognized thing that one of 471 00:25:46,160 --> 00:25:52,080 Speaker 1: the most disgusting things to witnesses, like a particularly entitled 472 00:25:52,119 --> 00:25:55,800 Speaker 1: and ungrateful child. Well that's fine, Willy Wonking the chocolate factory, 473 00:25:55,920 --> 00:25:59,439 Speaker 1: we see. I think several generations of this, right, the 474 00:25:59,480 --> 00:26:02,040 Speaker 1: ungrateful child, I guess for fru cassault one of the 475 00:26:02,080 --> 00:26:04,840 Speaker 1: ungrateful children. I don't know. I'm not a wally Wanka 476 00:26:05,440 --> 00:26:08,199 Speaker 1: expert here now, I'm trying to at least one of 477 00:26:08,240 --> 00:26:11,040 Speaker 1: them is definitely positioned as an ungrateful child, and and 478 00:26:11,600 --> 00:26:14,640 Speaker 1: a lot of I want it's and no thank you. Now, 479 00:26:14,640 --> 00:26:18,240 Speaker 1: of course, we realistically have to acknowledge that relationships between 480 00:26:18,760 --> 00:26:22,119 Speaker 1: children and parents. Is is often more complicated than this, 481 00:26:22,440 --> 00:26:26,240 Speaker 1: but still the trope, the idea of the cultural emphasis remains. 482 00:26:26,720 --> 00:26:31,440 Speaker 1: But in general, Judaism, Christianity, and Islam all stressed gratitude 483 00:26:31,520 --> 00:26:34,680 Speaker 1: is being part of a good life. It's also stressed 484 00:26:34,680 --> 00:26:38,240 Speaker 1: in Hinduism and Buddhism and other major faiths as well. 485 00:26:38,600 --> 00:26:42,679 Speaker 1: And often there's an emphasis put on gratitude as expressed 486 00:26:42,800 --> 00:26:45,920 Speaker 1: in prayer, absolutely, I think, And as we get into 487 00:26:45,920 --> 00:26:50,280 Speaker 1: the studies about psychological benefits of actively practicing gratitude, I 488 00:26:50,320 --> 00:26:52,200 Speaker 1: think this is one of the many arguments you could 489 00:26:52,240 --> 00:26:56,520 Speaker 1: make that there are secular psychological benefits to what you 490 00:26:56,560 --> 00:27:00,080 Speaker 1: would normally see as prayer behaviors, right right, And we 491 00:27:00,119 --> 00:27:03,960 Speaker 1: see various philosophers and thinkers throughout time chiming in on 492 00:27:04,080 --> 00:27:07,600 Speaker 1: gratitude as well, generally in favor of it. Um. So, 493 00:27:08,040 --> 00:27:10,879 Speaker 1: just a taste of some of these, um and maybe 494 00:27:10,880 --> 00:27:13,240 Speaker 1: we can go back and forth on these, uh, these, Joe, 495 00:27:13,520 --> 00:27:15,399 Speaker 1: if you want to take the first one. Oh, okay, 496 00:27:15,440 --> 00:27:18,680 Speaker 1: so Epicurus said, do not spoil what you have by 497 00:27:18,720 --> 00:27:21,760 Speaker 1: desiring what you have. Not remember that what you now 498 00:27:21,920 --> 00:27:24,800 Speaker 1: have was once among the things you only hoped for, 499 00:27:25,119 --> 00:27:28,919 Speaker 1: all right, And then Cicero once said gratitude is not 500 00:27:29,000 --> 00:27:32,200 Speaker 1: only the greatest of virtues, but the parent of all others. 501 00:27:32,320 --> 00:27:34,160 Speaker 1: I think he's close. I think the parent of all 502 00:27:34,160 --> 00:27:38,360 Speaker 1: others is probably honesty, but but gratitude right up there, 503 00:27:38,400 --> 00:27:41,800 Speaker 1: somewhere right below. I think gratitude fits in pretty well 504 00:27:41,840 --> 00:27:44,240 Speaker 1: with with the Stoic philosophy and you and you can 505 00:27:44,280 --> 00:27:47,560 Speaker 1: see this in the writings of Marcus Aurelius, where he said, 506 00:27:47,600 --> 00:27:51,760 Speaker 1: take full account of what excellencies you possess and ingratitude. 507 00:27:51,840 --> 00:27:54,480 Speaker 1: Remember how you would hanker after them if you had them. 508 00:27:54,520 --> 00:27:59,120 Speaker 1: Not Now, I was, of course curious what Aristotle had 509 00:27:59,160 --> 00:28:03,760 Speaker 1: to say, and because he's always wrong. Well, and you 510 00:28:03,840 --> 00:28:05,760 Speaker 1: might not be surprised here, depending on how you look 511 00:28:05,760 --> 00:28:08,919 Speaker 1: at it. Uh So, I've read different things about Aristotle's 512 00:28:08,920 --> 00:28:12,400 Speaker 1: approach to gratitude. On one hand, is pointed out by 513 00:28:12,480 --> 00:28:18,280 Speaker 1: Jacquelean Phifer Merrill in Philanthropy Daily, The Virtue of Gratitude 514 00:28:18,320 --> 00:28:22,320 Speaker 1: does the name of her piece, Aristotle did not list 515 00:28:22,880 --> 00:28:26,199 Speaker 1: gratitude as a virtue and actually listed several traits that 516 00:28:26,320 --> 00:28:29,159 Speaker 1: run opposite to the idea, such as having a quote 517 00:28:29,160 --> 00:28:34,000 Speaker 1: proper pride wasn't Aristotle also against mercy you didn't really 518 00:28:34,040 --> 00:28:38,520 Speaker 1: like it. Yeah. On the other hand, the Stanford Encyclopedia 519 00:28:38,520 --> 00:28:42,120 Speaker 1: Philosophy points out that gratitude quote fits nicely into Aristotle's 520 00:28:42,160 --> 00:28:45,680 Speaker 1: picture of virtue as a mean between an excess and 521 00:28:45,800 --> 00:28:49,280 Speaker 1: a deficiency, with gratitude being a mean between the vices 522 00:28:49,320 --> 00:28:53,120 Speaker 1: of arrogant, prideful, and envious ingratitude on one hand, and 523 00:28:53,200 --> 00:28:58,920 Speaker 1: the obsequiousness or servility of over gratitude on the other. Still, 524 00:28:58,960 --> 00:29:01,320 Speaker 1: I would say Aristotle not coming off as like the 525 00:29:01,480 --> 00:29:05,160 Speaker 1: the real poster child for gratitude. Well, I mean, I 526 00:29:05,160 --> 00:29:07,760 Speaker 1: think Aristotle was very much one. He was kind of 527 00:29:07,760 --> 00:29:11,360 Speaker 1: obsessed with like with like justice and the ledger being 528 00:29:11,480 --> 00:29:14,520 Speaker 1: evenly settled in things, so like you know, I think 529 00:29:14,520 --> 00:29:18,840 Speaker 1: he was against the idea of mercy or compassion towards 530 00:29:18,880 --> 00:29:22,840 Speaker 1: people who were receiving deserved or just suffering. And I 531 00:29:22,920 --> 00:29:26,720 Speaker 1: think he would probably likely hear be against um feelings 532 00:29:26,720 --> 00:29:31,000 Speaker 1: of gratitude that are disproportionate to the benefits received. All right, 533 00:29:31,040 --> 00:29:33,760 Speaker 1: let's fast forward a bit to some more recent thinkers. Okay, 534 00:29:33,760 --> 00:29:36,720 Speaker 1: it looks like we got Voltaire here, who said appreciation 535 00:29:36,840 --> 00:29:39,200 Speaker 1: is a wonderful thing. It makes what is excellent in 536 00:29:39,240 --> 00:29:43,640 Speaker 1: others belong to us as well. I really like that one. Uh. 537 00:29:43,720 --> 00:29:45,720 Speaker 1: And then here's one from C. S. Lewis. This is 538 00:29:45,720 --> 00:29:48,080 Speaker 1: from the screw tape letters U and off hand, I 539 00:29:48,080 --> 00:29:50,040 Speaker 1: don't remember if this is these are the words of 540 00:29:50,040 --> 00:29:53,800 Speaker 1: a demon or not, but quote, gratitude looks to the 541 00:29:53,840 --> 00:29:58,160 Speaker 1: past and loved the present, fear averaice, lust, and ambition 542 00:29:58,200 --> 00:30:02,360 Speaker 1: look ahead. So to take that for what it's worth now, 543 00:30:02,440 --> 00:30:04,760 Speaker 1: Now to come back to the idea of a you know, 544 00:30:04,800 --> 00:30:09,480 Speaker 1: sort of terrestrial and cosmic gratitude, uh, secular and religious thankfulness. 545 00:30:09,600 --> 00:30:13,560 Speaker 1: There's a wonderful two thousand fourteen Atlantic article titled Gratitude 546 00:30:13,560 --> 00:30:17,240 Speaker 1: without God that asks ask us what are we to 547 00:30:17,360 --> 00:30:21,080 Speaker 1: make of gratitude when we remove the spiritual elements so 548 00:30:21,200 --> 00:30:24,160 Speaker 1: key to it in religious modes of life? And in 549 00:30:24,240 --> 00:30:27,719 Speaker 1: this you see Davis psychologist at Robert Emmons is quoted 550 00:30:27,720 --> 00:30:29,959 Speaker 1: in the article, and I think he sums it up 551 00:30:30,000 --> 00:30:33,720 Speaker 1: rather nicely. Quote we all begin life dependent on others, 552 00:30:33,800 --> 00:30:36,640 Speaker 1: and most of us in life dependent on others. If 553 00:30:36,640 --> 00:30:39,800 Speaker 1: we are lucky in between, we have roughly sixty years 554 00:30:39,920 --> 00:30:43,920 Speaker 1: or so of unacknowledged dependency. The human condition is such 555 00:30:44,040 --> 00:30:46,800 Speaker 1: that throughout life, not just at the beginning and end. 556 00:30:47,160 --> 00:30:51,480 Speaker 1: We are profoundly dependent on other people. Gratitude is the 557 00:30:51,520 --> 00:30:55,120 Speaker 1: truest approach to life. We did not create or fashion ourselves. 558 00:30:55,200 --> 00:30:58,720 Speaker 1: We did not birth ourselves. Life is about giving, receiving, 559 00:30:58,880 --> 00:31:02,440 Speaker 1: and repaying. We are receptive beings dependent on the help 560 00:31:02,480 --> 00:31:06,200 Speaker 1: of others, on their gifts and their kindness. I think 561 00:31:06,280 --> 00:31:09,800 Speaker 1: that's lovely and extremely true. Robert Emmons, of course, is 562 00:31:10,720 --> 00:31:13,680 Speaker 1: a psychologist who's deeply involved in research on gratitude. You 563 00:31:13,680 --> 00:31:16,800 Speaker 1: see him all over like the UH the UC Berkeley 564 00:31:16,840 --> 00:31:19,840 Speaker 1: Greater Good Thing, which studies a lot of, like, you know, 565 00:31:19,920 --> 00:31:22,840 Speaker 1: positive emotions and things like that. He's all over that. 566 00:31:22,920 --> 00:31:26,200 Speaker 1: So he does a lot with UH emotions like gratitude. 567 00:31:26,760 --> 00:31:29,400 Speaker 1: But I I agree here. I mean, I think gratitude 568 00:31:29,480 --> 00:31:34,640 Speaker 1: is fundamentally an emotional state of honesty and realism, whereas 569 00:31:34,640 --> 00:31:39,200 Speaker 1: a roughly converse emotion like pride more often reflects delusion 570 00:31:39,360 --> 00:31:43,520 Speaker 1: and self deception. Essentially, none of the things about your 571 00:31:43,560 --> 00:31:47,280 Speaker 1: life that you enjoy could exist without the free gifts 572 00:31:47,280 --> 00:31:50,360 Speaker 1: given by others in the past and present. You're you know, 573 00:31:50,400 --> 00:31:53,440 Speaker 1: the society you live in, your education that made you 574 00:31:53,480 --> 00:31:55,960 Speaker 1: the person you are today, all the technology that you 575 00:31:56,040 --> 00:32:00,240 Speaker 1: benefit from the culture that you love it. Everything, everything 576 00:32:00,320 --> 00:32:02,600 Speaker 1: there is a gift from others in the past and 577 00:32:02,800 --> 00:32:05,600 Speaker 1: in the present to you, and to try to ignore 578 00:32:05,680 --> 00:32:10,280 Speaker 1: this is just factually deceptive. You know, think like I 579 00:32:10,360 --> 00:32:13,280 Speaker 1: deserve everything good that I get and and it's all 580 00:32:13,360 --> 00:32:16,800 Speaker 1: because of me. I think exactly the same way that 581 00:32:16,880 --> 00:32:20,280 Speaker 1: it feels good to tell the truth instead of lying. 582 00:32:20,520 --> 00:32:24,360 Speaker 1: It feels good to be grateful for everything that's good. Yes, 583 00:32:24,520 --> 00:32:29,360 Speaker 1: I would agree. Now. Also interesting in this uh, this 584 00:32:29,480 --> 00:32:32,480 Speaker 1: article that I that I quoted here the Gratitude without 585 00:32:32,520 --> 00:32:37,720 Speaker 1: God from the Atlantic. In uh, they cite Michael McCullough, 586 00:32:37,880 --> 00:32:40,960 Speaker 1: a psychologist at the University of Miami, who makes a 587 00:32:41,040 --> 00:32:44,320 Speaker 1: case that it may also be just hardwired into us 588 00:32:44,680 --> 00:32:48,240 Speaker 1: social apes, that we are traits for gratitude might be 589 00:32:48,360 --> 00:32:53,360 Speaker 1: enforced through natural selection. McCulloch has his research gratitude before before, 590 00:32:53,680 --> 00:32:55,760 Speaker 1: you know, finding that the doing nice things for people 591 00:32:55,840 --> 00:32:59,560 Speaker 1: unexpectedly produces gratitude and then it's more likely that we 592 00:32:59,560 --> 00:33:02,760 Speaker 1: will resk bond in kind. Yeah, uh yeah. And I 593 00:33:02,800 --> 00:33:05,880 Speaker 1: think there's been a lot of research on the dynamics 594 00:33:06,000 --> 00:33:10,640 Speaker 1: of of like social altruism and reciprocal behavior among social 595 00:33:10,640 --> 00:33:14,400 Speaker 1: species like like primates like us how do you form 596 00:33:14,640 --> 00:33:18,720 Speaker 1: stable social groups of complex animals like us. One pretty 597 00:33:18,760 --> 00:33:21,640 Speaker 1: simple way to do it is to operate on the 598 00:33:21,680 --> 00:33:25,320 Speaker 1: basis not it's not perfectly represented like this, but the 599 00:33:25,360 --> 00:33:29,560 Speaker 1: basis of roughly reciprocal behavior. When somebody does something nice 600 00:33:29,600 --> 00:33:31,760 Speaker 1: for you, you do something nice for them back. And 601 00:33:31,800 --> 00:33:36,040 Speaker 1: if animals with traits for this evolve, they can have 602 00:33:36,200 --> 00:33:39,640 Speaker 1: stable social groups. Yeah, I think I think that makes sense. 603 00:33:39,840 --> 00:33:41,480 Speaker 1: And again we are coming back to the fact that 604 00:33:41,520 --> 00:33:44,800 Speaker 1: we are these social beings and we depend so heavily 605 00:33:44,960 --> 00:33:50,320 Speaker 1: on on these social connections, though sometimes pride does at 606 00:33:50,360 --> 00:33:53,320 Speaker 1: least partially convinces that we that we were immune from 607 00:33:53,320 --> 00:33:56,080 Speaker 1: all of this. So indeed, there has been quite a 608 00:33:56,080 --> 00:33:59,440 Speaker 1: bit of research into gratitude and and so we're not 609 00:33:59,480 --> 00:34:02,160 Speaker 1: going to tell to include everything here, but I wanted 610 00:34:02,200 --> 00:34:05,040 Speaker 1: to start with just a few examples of recent studies 611 00:34:05,080 --> 00:34:07,520 Speaker 1: from the past few years before looking at more of 612 00:34:07,560 --> 00:34:10,680 Speaker 1: like a meta analysis of you know what in general 613 00:34:10,800 --> 00:34:14,080 Speaker 1: we know about gratitude. Right, So, there is a two 614 00:34:14,120 --> 00:34:18,520 Speaker 1: thousand seventeen University of Oregon study that found that journaling, uh, 615 00:34:18,560 --> 00:34:21,680 Speaker 1: you know, taking your thoughts, putting them onto paper, forcing 616 00:34:21,719 --> 00:34:27,040 Speaker 1: them into written language, inspired altruism through an exercise of gratitude. Yeah, 617 00:34:27,120 --> 00:34:29,279 Speaker 1: and that's going to be one thing that figures big 618 00:34:29,320 --> 00:34:32,080 Speaker 1: into scientific research on gratitude. You've got to find a 619 00:34:32,080 --> 00:34:34,719 Speaker 1: way to make it happen in the sort of lab 620 00:34:34,760 --> 00:34:38,440 Speaker 1: conditions or controlled conditions. And there are a couple of 621 00:34:38,440 --> 00:34:40,560 Speaker 1: things that are very common there that are referred to 622 00:34:40,600 --> 00:34:44,680 Speaker 1: as gratitude interventions. One big one is getting people to 623 00:34:44,800 --> 00:34:48,279 Speaker 1: like journal to write out their blessings and just like 624 00:34:48,400 --> 00:34:51,320 Speaker 1: mentally acknowledge them, going through the list and being thankful, 625 00:34:51,719 --> 00:34:53,759 Speaker 1: and that appears to work pretty well. And another one 626 00:34:53,840 --> 00:34:57,720 Speaker 1: is getting somebody to acknowledge a person directly, like writing 627 00:34:57,719 --> 00:35:01,120 Speaker 1: a letter of gratitude to someone. Yes. Uh. And these 628 00:35:01,440 --> 00:35:04,799 Speaker 1: these things don't work equally for everyone. Some people have 629 00:35:05,239 --> 00:35:09,319 Speaker 1: a disposition that's more toward gratitude to begin with, but 630 00:35:09,680 --> 00:35:12,799 Speaker 1: they do appear to be generally effective at triggering gratitude 631 00:35:12,840 --> 00:35:16,040 Speaker 1: and its subsequent benefits. It's something you can do that 632 00:35:16,120 --> 00:35:19,520 Speaker 1: will very likely change your emotional state, just to literally 633 00:35:19,520 --> 00:35:22,880 Speaker 1: sit down and think about your blessings. It looks like 634 00:35:22,920 --> 00:35:26,440 Speaker 1: it mostly works. Uh. Here's another one in two thousand 635 00:35:26,480 --> 00:35:30,120 Speaker 1: eighteen University of Chicago Booth School of Business. Because of course, 636 00:35:30,160 --> 00:35:33,120 Speaker 1: gratitude is in every aspect of life, and of course 637 00:35:33,120 --> 00:35:35,239 Speaker 1: in the business sphere as well. Right, how can you 638 00:35:35,320 --> 00:35:39,359 Speaker 1: use gratitude to extract money from other people? Well, this 639 00:35:39,400 --> 00:35:41,160 Speaker 1: is interesting that it ties into that, I think, the 640 00:35:41,200 --> 00:35:43,000 Speaker 1: every day experience, because he said that they found that 641 00:35:43,000 --> 00:35:45,919 Speaker 1: people tend to underestimate the power of, say, a letter 642 00:35:46,000 --> 00:35:49,719 Speaker 1: of gratitude. They also, you know, commented that despite all 643 00:35:49,760 --> 00:35:53,160 Speaker 1: the research and the media coverage and it is the 644 00:35:53,160 --> 00:35:57,480 Speaker 1: the popular notion that gratitude is good, the public, you know, 645 00:35:57,719 --> 00:36:02,239 Speaker 1: tends do not exercise these exercises of gratitude enough through 646 00:36:02,320 --> 00:36:05,399 Speaker 1: expressions like this, through like just a note of thank you. 647 00:36:05,840 --> 00:36:07,560 Speaker 1: That's what I was getting at earlier. I mean, on 648 00:36:07,560 --> 00:36:11,120 Speaker 1: one hand, it's it's not very surprising to say that, yes, 649 00:36:11,200 --> 00:36:15,920 Speaker 1: gratitude has strong psychological benefits, Practicing gratitude is really good 650 00:36:15,960 --> 00:36:18,839 Speaker 1: and you should do it. That might be the conventional 651 00:36:18,880 --> 00:36:21,680 Speaker 1: wisdom anyway. But people don't. We don't act as if 652 00:36:21,719 --> 00:36:23,759 Speaker 1: it is. And and I kind of get from this 653 00:36:23,880 --> 00:36:25,320 Speaker 1: the fact that it's such a you know, it's a 654 00:36:25,360 --> 00:36:27,680 Speaker 1: business school of business paper. I'm getting there, like even 655 00:36:27,880 --> 00:36:31,799 Speaker 1: from like a macke a Valian sort of stand. They're not. 656 00:36:31,800 --> 00:36:35,440 Speaker 1: It's like you're not manipulating gratitude enough, but that kind 657 00:36:35,440 --> 00:36:38,200 Speaker 1: of like ties into our overall you know, perhaps an 658 00:36:38,280 --> 00:36:41,400 Speaker 1: overall lack of gratitude. Maybe we're being ungrateful to our 659 00:36:41,440 --> 00:36:44,400 Speaker 1: friends in the business world. They're not always mackilli no, no, 660 00:36:44,800 --> 00:36:47,520 Speaker 1: there might be little elements of that. Here's another one. 661 00:36:47,600 --> 00:36:51,600 Speaker 1: Two thousand eighteen, researchers from Peking University used neuroimaging to 662 00:36:51,640 --> 00:36:55,359 Speaker 1: demonstrate a possible brain network involved in the translation of 663 00:36:55,400 --> 00:36:59,960 Speaker 1: altruism into feelings of thankfulness. So I mean, basically, we're 664 00:37:00,040 --> 00:37:03,960 Speaker 1: setting on two decades a plus of work that supports 665 00:37:04,000 --> 00:37:07,960 Speaker 1: the longstanding idea that gratitude is a worthwhile virtue with 666 00:37:08,040 --> 00:37:12,959 Speaker 1: positive effects on health, happiness, and relationships and also tends 667 00:37:13,040 --> 00:37:18,520 Speaker 1: to lessen uh, negative emotional states like in the and materialism. 668 00:37:18,560 --> 00:37:21,160 Speaker 1: So indeed, there's a great deal of research out there 669 00:37:21,200 --> 00:37:23,279 Speaker 1: about gratitude, and I was, I was looking through a 670 00:37:23,280 --> 00:37:25,040 Speaker 1: lot of it, and I found a really good two 671 00:37:25,040 --> 00:37:29,320 Speaker 1: thousand seventeen paper by laos at all in p. Los 672 00:37:29,440 --> 00:37:32,200 Speaker 1: one and UH and this did a lot of sort 673 00:37:32,200 --> 00:37:34,640 Speaker 1: of meta analysis sort of catching us up on on 674 00:37:34,680 --> 00:37:38,080 Speaker 1: what has occurred in previous decades in the researching of 675 00:37:38,200 --> 00:37:41,080 Speaker 1: gratitude and and a lot of these do come down 676 00:37:41,080 --> 00:37:43,840 Speaker 1: to these experiments that you described already Joe about you know, 677 00:37:43,920 --> 00:37:46,360 Speaker 1: asking someone to account their blessings before you know it 678 00:37:46,400 --> 00:37:48,160 Speaker 1: as part of the experiment, or asking them to write 679 00:37:48,160 --> 00:37:51,200 Speaker 1: a letter of gratitude. Right. So, this paper, is the 680 00:37:51,200 --> 00:37:54,360 Speaker 1: title indicates, was largely focused on looking at the quote 681 00:37:54,400 --> 00:37:59,759 Speaker 1: complex constellation of social emotions people experience after practicing gratitude. 682 00:38:00,040 --> 00:38:02,920 Speaker 1: But in doing so they do a wonderful meta analysis 683 00:38:03,000 --> 00:38:06,600 Speaker 1: of prior gratitude research and this is basically is a 684 00:38:06,600 --> 00:38:10,080 Speaker 1: short version of what they lay out. So, first of all, 685 00:38:10,160 --> 00:38:13,480 Speaker 1: numerous past studies have proven that there are tangible positive 686 00:38:13,480 --> 00:38:18,920 Speaker 1: benefits to gratitude. I've listed some of these already, health, happiness, relationships, etcetera. 687 00:38:19,560 --> 00:38:22,120 Speaker 1: And then following up on these, additional studies looked to 688 00:38:22,320 --> 00:38:27,440 Speaker 1: ways to induce these feelings in experiments through gratitude exercises. 689 00:38:27,719 --> 00:38:30,839 Speaker 1: So there's about a decade of that, and then, uh, 690 00:38:30,880 --> 00:38:33,120 Speaker 1: there are papers such as this one. They look more 691 00:38:33,200 --> 00:38:36,560 Speaker 1: at exactly what might be going on and how it factors, 692 00:38:37,080 --> 00:38:41,960 Speaker 1: you know, into the human experience, and through their own studies. 693 00:38:42,000 --> 00:38:46,000 Speaker 1: In this paper, the researchers found that gratitude exercises feel 694 00:38:46,040 --> 00:38:50,560 Speaker 1: pleasant and mildly unpleasant at the same time, which I 695 00:38:50,640 --> 00:38:53,360 Speaker 1: think is really insightful. This is something that I I 696 00:38:53,360 --> 00:38:55,239 Speaker 1: didn't even really think about, but then after I read it, 697 00:38:55,280 --> 00:38:57,799 Speaker 1: I'm like, well, that's that's exactly right. Yeah, if when 698 00:38:57,800 --> 00:39:00,120 Speaker 1: I'm when I'm engaging in an exercise of grat to 699 00:39:01,400 --> 00:39:03,799 Speaker 1: which you know, it might be in the prayer. I've 700 00:39:03,800 --> 00:39:07,279 Speaker 1: gone to yoga classes where they do, uh, gratitude exercise 701 00:39:07,320 --> 00:39:10,720 Speaker 1: as well. Uh, they can feel a little bitter sweet 702 00:39:11,080 --> 00:39:15,719 Speaker 1: because in contemplating what you have there and and what 703 00:39:15,760 --> 00:39:18,480 Speaker 1: has you know, the various aids that have been present 704 00:39:18,520 --> 00:39:20,400 Speaker 1: to help you get where you are in your life, 705 00:39:20,920 --> 00:39:23,600 Speaker 1: as well as the cosmic things in place. You know, 706 00:39:23,680 --> 00:39:27,279 Speaker 1: you you end up at least partially contemplating uh, you know, 707 00:39:27,360 --> 00:39:31,520 Speaker 1: the situation of others and uh and indeed getting into 708 00:39:31,560 --> 00:39:33,680 Speaker 1: that there but for fortune kind of zone that we 709 00:39:33,760 --> 00:39:36,760 Speaker 1: discussed earlier. Yeah, I think there there are multiple reasons 710 00:39:36,760 --> 00:39:41,960 Speaker 1: that practicing gratitude, while very psychologically beneficial overall, it can 711 00:39:42,000 --> 00:39:44,480 Speaker 1: be bitter sweet. And of course one of the reasons 712 00:39:44,560 --> 00:39:48,680 Speaker 1: is acknowledging the misfortune of others while you acknowledge your 713 00:39:48,680 --> 00:39:51,240 Speaker 1: own fortune. I mean that that of course, it doesn't 714 00:39:51,280 --> 00:39:54,239 Speaker 1: feel good to contemplate the fact that you have what 715 00:39:54,360 --> 00:39:58,520 Speaker 1: others do not have. But then also there's another thing, 716 00:39:58,560 --> 00:40:01,680 Speaker 1: which is just like, there's a certain part of you that, 717 00:40:01,800 --> 00:40:05,200 Speaker 1: even when you're trying to practice gratitude, probably always wants 718 00:40:05,239 --> 00:40:09,279 Speaker 1: to be a bit narcissistic and entitled and think that, well, I, 719 00:40:09,360 --> 00:40:11,719 Speaker 1: you know, I just get what's coming to me, all 720 00:40:11,760 --> 00:40:14,200 Speaker 1: the good things coming my way, or because I deserve them, 721 00:40:14,200 --> 00:40:16,440 Speaker 1: and I'm so great and I've earned everything i have, 722 00:40:16,520 --> 00:40:19,839 Speaker 1: and you know, people sometimes like to think that way, 723 00:40:19,840 --> 00:40:22,680 Speaker 1: and it's weird that So I think the research is 724 00:40:22,719 --> 00:40:27,120 Speaker 1: absolutely clear that actively practicing gratitude and acknowledging all of 725 00:40:27,160 --> 00:40:29,719 Speaker 1: the blessings that have come your way, being thankful for 726 00:40:29,760 --> 00:40:31,799 Speaker 1: what other people have done for you and for your 727 00:40:31,840 --> 00:40:35,200 Speaker 1: good fortune and luck, that has positive benefits and it 728 00:40:35,280 --> 00:40:38,719 Speaker 1: feels good. But if you are encouraged to do that, 729 00:40:38,800 --> 00:40:42,000 Speaker 1: if certain especially certain people with a kind of disposition 730 00:40:42,040 --> 00:40:46,080 Speaker 1: against gratitude, are encouraged to do things like that using 731 00:40:46,080 --> 00:40:49,160 Speaker 1: the wrong language or the wrong tone of voice, they 732 00:40:49,160 --> 00:40:53,040 Speaker 1: can often become incredibly defensive and defiant, like it's the 733 00:40:53,160 --> 00:40:57,400 Speaker 1: suggestion that they have benefited from privileges and blessings and 734 00:40:57,440 --> 00:40:59,600 Speaker 1: stuff do you know what I mean? Absolutely, Yeah, they 735 00:41:00,200 --> 00:41:02,600 Speaker 1: Obviously there's a lot of talk and culture today about 736 00:41:02,680 --> 00:41:06,040 Speaker 1: about the various privileges that we have and checking your privilege, 737 00:41:06,120 --> 00:41:10,160 Speaker 1: acknowledging your privilege, and and and and factoring that into 738 00:41:10,880 --> 00:41:14,400 Speaker 1: how you relate to others, how you empathize with other people, 739 00:41:15,040 --> 00:41:17,960 Speaker 1: which which is I think a very important exercise and 740 00:41:18,080 --> 00:41:21,480 Speaker 1: essential exercise. But yeah, at the same time, like that's 741 00:41:21,480 --> 00:41:24,319 Speaker 1: a way to really raise somebody's defenses. Absolutely. I mean, 742 00:41:24,440 --> 00:41:27,040 Speaker 1: I think I could be wrong, but what I tend 743 00:41:27,080 --> 00:41:30,080 Speaker 1: to imagine is going on there is that even though 744 00:41:30,120 --> 00:41:32,480 Speaker 1: I think most people would acknowledge that it is good 745 00:41:32,520 --> 00:41:36,200 Speaker 1: to understand and think about the blessings you've received, you know, 746 00:41:36,280 --> 00:41:39,680 Speaker 1: the honored privileges that that you benefit from, that if 747 00:41:39,760 --> 00:41:42,359 Speaker 1: you are encouraged to do so by someone that you 748 00:41:42,440 --> 00:41:45,080 Speaker 1: don't see as sympathetic to you, you know, if you're 749 00:41:45,160 --> 00:41:48,440 Speaker 1: encouraged to do that by somebody you see as maybe 750 00:41:48,480 --> 00:41:52,239 Speaker 1: a potential enemy or stranger outsider, you get kind of 751 00:41:52,480 --> 00:41:54,520 Speaker 1: you just like put the walls up and you're like, no, 752 00:41:54,719 --> 00:41:57,200 Speaker 1: it feels like an attack. Yeah, And I wonder if 753 00:41:57,239 --> 00:42:00,120 Speaker 1: part of this, getting back to this bittersweet aspect of 754 00:42:00,120 --> 00:42:03,759 Speaker 1: of gratitude is that it is placing yourself into a 755 00:42:03,840 --> 00:42:07,560 Speaker 1: state of vulnerability, which which is generally something that's the 756 00:42:07,600 --> 00:42:10,320 Speaker 1: kind of thing that is necessary for change, that's necessary 757 00:42:10,400 --> 00:42:14,600 Speaker 1: for for for a lot of like positive movements of 758 00:42:14,600 --> 00:42:17,440 Speaker 1: of the of of of the mind and the and 759 00:42:17,600 --> 00:42:20,719 Speaker 1: our sense of identity, but it can also be frightening. 760 00:42:20,960 --> 00:42:24,040 Speaker 1: Also in this paper, they speculated that this mixed emotional 761 00:42:24,080 --> 00:42:28,799 Speaker 1: experience is perhaps more motivating than like a purely positive 762 00:42:29,320 --> 00:42:33,160 Speaker 1: emotional experience would be. Uh. They write, quote, indeed, it 763 00:42:33,280 --> 00:42:36,719 Speaker 1: may be this bittersweet state and the behaviors it elicits 764 00:42:37,000 --> 00:42:41,799 Speaker 1: that explain why gratitude exercises lead to downstream positive outcomes 765 00:42:42,160 --> 00:42:47,000 Speaker 1: pro sociality, health, promoting behavior, etcetera, lending support to the 766 00:42:47,040 --> 00:42:50,239 Speaker 1: age old wisdom that gratitude is indeed a virtue. Right, 767 00:42:50,480 --> 00:42:53,040 Speaker 1: so it's not just like an emotion or an emotional state, 768 00:42:53,040 --> 00:42:56,239 Speaker 1: but it is actually motivating. We already talked about the 769 00:42:56,280 --> 00:42:59,160 Speaker 1: idea that gratitude is an emotion that maybe in an 770 00:42:59,160 --> 00:43:04,480 Speaker 1: evolutionary promotes pro social behavior, promotes like in group cooperation, 771 00:43:04,719 --> 00:43:08,359 Speaker 1: reciprocal altruism with people you know, doing a nice thing 772 00:43:08,440 --> 00:43:10,600 Speaker 1: for people who you imagine would do a nice thing 773 00:43:10,640 --> 00:43:12,359 Speaker 1: for you, or have done a nice thing for you. 774 00:43:12,640 --> 00:43:15,200 Speaker 1: That of course is very important social behavior, but health 775 00:43:15,200 --> 00:43:17,799 Speaker 1: promoting behavior. That that's another really interesting one. It does 776 00:43:17,800 --> 00:43:20,719 Speaker 1: show up a lot in the research that you practice gratitude, 777 00:43:20,719 --> 00:43:23,880 Speaker 1: you're less likely to abuse your own body in various ways. 778 00:43:24,320 --> 00:43:27,000 Speaker 1: It's hard to imagine exactly what the mechanism is there, 779 00:43:27,000 --> 00:43:28,799 Speaker 1: but I can see it have something to do with 780 00:43:28,840 --> 00:43:32,440 Speaker 1: the kind of the kind of bittersweet self reflection brought 781 00:43:32,520 --> 00:43:36,759 Speaker 1: on by understanding the things you benefit from. Yeah. I 782 00:43:36,800 --> 00:43:38,719 Speaker 1: also I also think there's probably connection there to the 783 00:43:38,800 --> 00:43:41,560 Speaker 1: I mean, there is a connection between gratitude and altruism, 784 00:43:41,560 --> 00:43:43,040 Speaker 1: and you know some of the we discussed some of 785 00:43:43,040 --> 00:43:45,960 Speaker 1: that connection already, but you can see where you could 786 00:43:46,200 --> 00:43:48,239 Speaker 1: you could be asked to feel the gratitude you're so 787 00:43:48,400 --> 00:43:50,200 Speaker 1: you're you're thankful for the food you have, if you 788 00:43:50,200 --> 00:43:52,440 Speaker 1: have enough food to feed your family, right, and then 789 00:43:52,480 --> 00:43:54,719 Speaker 1: you realize in doing that that a lot of people 790 00:43:54,760 --> 00:43:57,440 Speaker 1: cannot make this statement, and then that may lead to 791 00:43:57,480 --> 00:44:00,440 Speaker 1: them to the action to actually doing something like signing 792 00:44:00,480 --> 00:44:03,160 Speaker 1: up for a meal delivery program, participating in a canned 793 00:44:03,200 --> 00:44:06,880 Speaker 1: food drive, or or other acts of altruism. Yeah, I 794 00:44:06,920 --> 00:44:10,120 Speaker 1: think that's entirely plausible. Now focusing just on the immediate 795 00:44:10,320 --> 00:44:15,960 Speaker 1: psychological benefits of of of practicing gratitude, I was watching 796 00:44:15,960 --> 00:44:19,280 Speaker 1: a short talk by the U. C. Davis psychologist Robert A. Emmons, 797 00:44:19,280 --> 00:44:22,120 Speaker 1: who is deeply involved in a lot of this gratitude research. 798 00:44:22,520 --> 00:44:24,680 Speaker 1: I think we already mentioned him earlier, so yeah, we 799 00:44:24,719 --> 00:44:26,880 Speaker 1: read a quote from yeah uh, and he he just 800 00:44:26,920 --> 00:44:29,959 Speaker 1: makes a number of points summarizing some of the big 801 00:44:30,000 --> 00:44:34,279 Speaker 1: takeaways from gratitude research and its emotional benefits. One of 802 00:44:34,320 --> 00:44:36,719 Speaker 1: the things he mentions that I think is interesting is 803 00:44:36,760 --> 00:44:42,160 Speaker 1: that under natural circumstances, states of positive emotion quickly where off. 804 00:44:42,400 --> 00:44:46,320 Speaker 1: You know, like you you you're happy because something good happened. 805 00:44:46,760 --> 00:44:49,080 Speaker 1: You know that can be anything from you know, I 806 00:44:49,200 --> 00:44:52,279 Speaker 1: loved one did something nice for you, or you've got 807 00:44:52,280 --> 00:44:54,200 Speaker 1: to raise at work or whatever it is. You know 808 00:44:54,239 --> 00:44:56,319 Speaker 1: that leads to this feeling of like oh wow, you 809 00:44:56,360 --> 00:44:59,560 Speaker 1: know the things are great. Those emotional states wear off 810 00:44:59,719 --> 00:45:02,480 Speaker 1: really fast. We're we're prone to sort of like go 811 00:45:02,600 --> 00:45:06,040 Speaker 1: back to baseline or or pay attention to the new stimulus. 812 00:45:06,600 --> 00:45:10,120 Speaker 1: But research indicates that actively practicing gratitude sort of has 813 00:45:10,200 --> 00:45:14,400 Speaker 1: the power to prolong and sustain states of positive emotion. 814 00:45:14,760 --> 00:45:19,640 Speaker 1: It prevents that wearing off effect and positive emotional states 815 00:45:19,680 --> 00:45:23,839 Speaker 1: being supplanted by novelty and your experience. And I think 816 00:45:23,880 --> 00:45:26,520 Speaker 1: that's a pretty straightforward effect, right, just like just like 817 00:45:26,600 --> 00:45:29,719 Speaker 1: thinking about your blessings allows you to enjoy them more. 818 00:45:30,360 --> 00:45:33,800 Speaker 1: Another thing he points out is that gratitude actively suppresses 819 00:45:33,880 --> 00:45:37,759 Speaker 1: some negative emotions and emotional states, not all, but some uh. 820 00:45:37,800 --> 00:45:40,640 Speaker 1: And the negative emotional states that he flags as as 821 00:45:40,680 --> 00:45:46,880 Speaker 1: being sort of blocked by practicing gratitude are envy, resentment, regret, 822 00:45:47,120 --> 00:45:50,880 Speaker 1: and depression. Another thing he mentions is that gratitude encourages 823 00:45:50,920 --> 00:45:55,960 Speaker 1: psychological resilience. That just means it that like dispositional gratitude, 824 00:45:55,960 --> 00:45:59,040 Speaker 1: if you if you train yourself to become a gratitude 825 00:45:59,280 --> 00:46:02,400 Speaker 1: disposed kind of person, it makes it easier to recover 826 00:46:02,520 --> 00:46:04,480 Speaker 1: when bad things happen to you and when you enter 827 00:46:04,600 --> 00:46:08,239 Speaker 1: negative emotional states. Uh. And then finally, of course, that 828 00:46:08,320 --> 00:46:09,880 Speaker 1: this goes more to what we were talking about just 829 00:46:09,920 --> 00:46:14,480 Speaker 1: a minute ago. Gratitude strengthened social bonding and increases our 830 00:46:14,600 --> 00:46:17,600 Speaker 1: feeling of self worth. Uh. And I think the self 831 00:46:17,640 --> 00:46:20,520 Speaker 1: worth thing is very interesting because there's some kind of 832 00:46:20,719 --> 00:46:24,920 Speaker 1: perhaps ironic or or seemingly on its face, self contradictory 833 00:46:24,960 --> 00:46:29,160 Speaker 1: thing going on with gratitude. It seems like gratitude simultaneously 834 00:46:29,640 --> 00:46:33,640 Speaker 1: causes us to, you know, like be less self focused 835 00:46:33,680 --> 00:46:37,680 Speaker 1: and less narcissistic and less uh, less likely to believe that, 836 00:46:37,840 --> 00:46:40,600 Speaker 1: you know, we just deserve everything good that's come our way. 837 00:46:40,680 --> 00:46:42,719 Speaker 1: We earned it all. But on the other hand, it 838 00:46:42,800 --> 00:46:46,880 Speaker 1: does somehow make people feel more worthy. I wonder if 839 00:46:46,920 --> 00:46:49,680 Speaker 1: it is because on some level, like our our most 840 00:46:49,680 --> 00:46:53,520 Speaker 1: pronounced version of the egoic self, you know, the most 841 00:46:53,560 --> 00:46:56,320 Speaker 1: inflated version, which is going to vary from individual to 842 00:46:56,400 --> 00:47:00,719 Speaker 1: the individual. But that that that edifice that we put out, 843 00:47:00,880 --> 00:47:04,120 Speaker 1: you know that it is on some level, even as 844 00:47:04,120 --> 00:47:06,360 Speaker 1: we're saying it, we know that it is an inflation, 845 00:47:06,840 --> 00:47:11,240 Speaker 1: and acts of gratitude forced us to withdraw that that 846 00:47:11,239 --> 00:47:14,680 Speaker 1: that self balloon to to a more reasonable level. That 847 00:47:14,760 --> 00:47:16,960 Speaker 1: then we can feel a lot better about Yeah, it's 848 00:47:16,960 --> 00:47:19,880 Speaker 1: true like that, you might feel better thinking about your 849 00:47:19,880 --> 00:47:23,680 Speaker 1: own accomplishments if you're more humble and considering what they are, right, 850 00:47:23,880 --> 00:47:26,399 Speaker 1: because you've come down from I am a golden God too, 851 00:47:26,760 --> 00:47:29,360 Speaker 1: I'm an okay person, And then you're like, yeah, I 852 00:47:29,360 --> 00:47:31,839 Speaker 1: can stand behind that that statement. I'm my hands aren't 853 00:47:31,880 --> 00:47:34,959 Speaker 1: shaking when I say it. But I've got another possible theory. 854 00:47:35,000 --> 00:47:38,440 Speaker 1: This isn't something that that I've read asserted elsewhere, but 855 00:47:38,760 --> 00:47:40,840 Speaker 1: it sort of ties into what we were just thinking about. 856 00:47:41,160 --> 00:47:44,359 Speaker 1: And I'm wondering if there's a tie in to an 857 00:47:44,360 --> 00:47:48,680 Speaker 1: extrapolated version of something known as the Ben Franklin effect. 858 00:47:48,719 --> 00:47:50,120 Speaker 1: I think maybe we should take a break and then 859 00:47:50,120 --> 00:47:51,840 Speaker 1: we can come back and talk about this. All right, 860 00:47:51,920 --> 00:47:56,840 Speaker 1: we'll do it. All right, We're back, and I have 861 00:47:56,920 --> 00:47:58,560 Speaker 1: to admit I kind of feel like I want to 862 00:47:58,640 --> 00:48:00,600 Speaker 1: ring a bell or have a sound of fact anytime 863 00:48:00,640 --> 00:48:02,960 Speaker 1: Ben Franklin shows up in either stuff to blow your 864 00:48:02,960 --> 00:48:05,600 Speaker 1: mind or invention, because it does seem like he'll pop 865 00:48:05,680 --> 00:48:08,480 Speaker 1: in like a special guest star, like a frequent special 866 00:48:08,520 --> 00:48:11,040 Speaker 1: guest star in a sitcom, Like suddenly he's here. What's 867 00:48:11,040 --> 00:48:13,160 Speaker 1: he gonna do? Is he gonna experiment with something? Is 868 00:48:13,200 --> 00:48:16,520 Speaker 1: he going to, uh, you know, share some wisdom? What's 869 00:48:16,560 --> 00:48:21,719 Speaker 1: his role? Franklin m Franklin effect. Well, I kind of 870 00:48:21,760 --> 00:48:24,920 Speaker 1: can't you know. I don't love all the so called 871 00:48:24,960 --> 00:48:27,680 Speaker 1: founding fathers equally, but I think maybe I'm sort of 872 00:48:27,719 --> 00:48:30,719 Speaker 1: a you might call a Franco file. I like I 873 00:48:30,800 --> 00:48:33,279 Speaker 1: like Franklin, all right, Well, how does he tie into gratitude? 874 00:48:33,280 --> 00:48:36,799 Speaker 1: All right? So this is a principle known as the 875 00:48:36,880 --> 00:48:42,799 Speaker 1: Ben Franklin effect frank him Franklin effect. And here's a 876 00:48:42,960 --> 00:48:46,520 Speaker 1: very simple version of it. You're more likely to do 877 00:48:46,560 --> 00:48:49,600 Speaker 1: a favor for me if you've already done me a 878 00:48:49,600 --> 00:48:53,720 Speaker 1: favor in the past. It's named after a story Benjamin 879 00:48:53,719 --> 00:48:56,920 Speaker 1: Franklin tells in his autobiography about how when he was 880 00:48:56,960 --> 00:49:00,120 Speaker 1: serving as a clerk in the Pennsylvania General Assembly, and 881 00:49:00,160 --> 00:49:02,160 Speaker 1: this was before the American Revolution, this would be in 882 00:49:02,160 --> 00:49:05,880 Speaker 1: the colonial administration of the mid seventeen thirties. Uh. Franklin 883 00:49:05,960 --> 00:49:09,000 Speaker 1: tells how one year, a new member of the Assembly 884 00:49:09,120 --> 00:49:13,719 Speaker 1: shows up and makes this long speech against Franklin's candidacy 885 00:49:13,760 --> 00:49:16,000 Speaker 1: for reappointment to the clerkship. So we've got like an 886 00:49:16,040 --> 00:49:20,400 Speaker 1: anti Franklinite in the Assembly who's up there railing against Franklin. 887 00:49:21,080 --> 00:49:24,800 Speaker 1: And Franklin evaluates this guy and he judges that actually, 888 00:49:24,840 --> 00:49:28,399 Speaker 1: this guy would make a good ally in the future because, uh, 889 00:49:28,440 --> 00:49:31,560 Speaker 1: he's likely to have a lot of influence, he's wealthy, 890 00:49:31,719 --> 00:49:35,120 Speaker 1: he's well educated, and he's got a lot of political talents. 891 00:49:35,120 --> 00:49:37,840 Speaker 1: So Franklin wants to turn this enemy into a friend, 892 00:49:37,880 --> 00:49:41,120 Speaker 1: but he also doesn't want to do anything humiliating or 893 00:49:41,120 --> 00:49:44,719 Speaker 1: pay any quote, pay any servile respect to him, which 894 00:49:44,840 --> 00:49:49,000 Speaker 1: you know, I admire Franklin for admitting that like petty resistance. Right. 895 00:49:49,480 --> 00:49:52,160 Speaker 1: So he comes up with a plan to ingratiate himself 896 00:49:52,200 --> 00:49:55,760 Speaker 1: to this guy, and he writes describing it here quote. 897 00:49:56,480 --> 00:49:59,160 Speaker 1: Having heard that he had in his library a certain 898 00:49:59,320 --> 00:50:02,360 Speaker 1: very scary, sin curious book, I wrote a note to 899 00:50:02,440 --> 00:50:06,200 Speaker 1: him expressing my desire of perusing that book, and requesting 900 00:50:06,239 --> 00:50:08,480 Speaker 1: he would do me the favor of lending it to 901 00:50:08,520 --> 00:50:11,600 Speaker 1: me for a few days. He sent it immediately, and 902 00:50:11,640 --> 00:50:13,959 Speaker 1: I returned it in about a week with another note 903 00:50:14,000 --> 00:50:17,480 Speaker 1: expressing strongly my sense of the favor. When we next 904 00:50:17,600 --> 00:50:19,880 Speaker 1: met in the house, he spoke to me, which he 905 00:50:19,880 --> 00:50:22,960 Speaker 1: had never done before, and with great civility, And he 906 00:50:23,040 --> 00:50:26,640 Speaker 1: ever after manifested a readiness to serve me on all occasions, 907 00:50:26,640 --> 00:50:29,840 Speaker 1: so that we became great friends, and our friendship continued 908 00:50:30,040 --> 00:50:33,040 Speaker 1: to his death. This is another instance of the truth 909 00:50:33,080 --> 00:50:35,680 Speaker 1: of an old maxim I had learned, which says he 910 00:50:35,760 --> 00:50:37,879 Speaker 1: that has once done you a kindness, will be more 911 00:50:37,920 --> 00:50:41,000 Speaker 1: ready to do you another than he whom you yourself 912 00:50:41,080 --> 00:50:44,600 Speaker 1: have obliged, and it shows how much more profitable it 913 00:50:44,640 --> 00:50:48,400 Speaker 1: is to prudently remove than to resent return and continue 914 00:50:48,440 --> 00:50:52,080 Speaker 1: inimical proceedings. And that, of course, that's that's certain, very 915 00:50:52,120 --> 00:50:55,759 Speaker 1: scarce and curious book was, of course the necronomic I 916 00:50:55,840 --> 00:50:59,760 Speaker 1: think so it's it's how Franklin learned the electrostatic secrets 917 00:50:59,800 --> 00:51:04,319 Speaker 1: of a So Franklin's observation can be generalized. If you 918 00:51:04,360 --> 00:51:07,360 Speaker 1: want to make somebody like you, to make them treat 919 00:51:07,400 --> 00:51:10,400 Speaker 1: you better, get them to do you a small favor. 920 00:51:10,840 --> 00:51:14,480 Speaker 1: After somebody does you a small favor, their feelings about 921 00:51:14,520 --> 00:51:17,520 Speaker 1: you become more amicable and they become more likely to 922 00:51:17,520 --> 00:51:22,760 Speaker 1: treat you better in other ways, frank from Franklin effect. 923 00:51:23,200 --> 00:51:26,080 Speaker 1: So a couple of questions. This is just a historical anecdote. 924 00:51:26,120 --> 00:51:29,080 Speaker 1: First of all, is this effect generally real? Can it 925 00:51:29,120 --> 00:51:32,439 Speaker 1: be empirically confirmed? And if so, how does this tie 926 00:51:32,440 --> 00:51:35,960 Speaker 1: back into gratitude as we were talking about earlier. So 927 00:51:36,080 --> 00:51:39,279 Speaker 1: the first question is their empirical evidence for the Ben 928 00:51:39,360 --> 00:51:43,400 Speaker 1: Franklin effect. I think the scientific evidence is not overwhelming, 929 00:51:43,480 --> 00:51:45,600 Speaker 1: but there are a few studies and they do seem 930 00:51:45,640 --> 00:51:48,960 Speaker 1: to support the effect. One famous one was from the 931 00:51:49,040 --> 00:51:51,400 Speaker 1: nineteen sixties. I think it's from sixty nine in the 932 00:51:51,440 --> 00:51:55,040 Speaker 1: journal Human Relations by Jecker and Landy called liking a 933 00:51:55,080 --> 00:51:57,880 Speaker 1: person as a function of doing him a favor. And 934 00:51:58,000 --> 00:52:01,440 Speaker 1: the authors here did this complicated seizure with a with 935 00:52:01,680 --> 00:52:06,040 Speaker 1: with having participants go into a sham experiment that involved 936 00:52:06,120 --> 00:52:08,640 Speaker 1: payouts of small payouts of money at the end of 937 00:52:08,640 --> 00:52:12,440 Speaker 1: the experiment uh. And they had different conditions where experiment 938 00:52:12,560 --> 00:52:15,279 Speaker 1: ers or somebody acting on behalf of the experiment or 939 00:52:15,680 --> 00:52:19,960 Speaker 1: would ask participants to do favors for them, including returning 940 00:52:20,040 --> 00:52:22,319 Speaker 1: the small amounts of money that they had won for 941 00:52:22,360 --> 00:52:24,960 Speaker 1: participation in the experiment, Like there was a ruse where 942 00:52:24,960 --> 00:52:27,920 Speaker 1: they'd say, actually funding his run out and and this 943 00:52:28,000 --> 00:52:30,759 Speaker 1: is your payment, but uh, I'm having to fund these 944 00:52:30,760 --> 00:52:33,000 Speaker 1: experiments out of my own pocket, so I would really 945 00:52:33,000 --> 00:52:35,520 Speaker 1: appreciate if you would return the money. And then they 946 00:52:35,560 --> 00:52:39,680 Speaker 1: also tried asking for this favor through an intermediary like 947 00:52:39,760 --> 00:52:43,520 Speaker 1: a department secretary, and the authors did indeed find that 948 00:52:43,680 --> 00:52:48,560 Speaker 1: after doing somebody a favor, participants on average reported liking 949 00:52:48,600 --> 00:52:51,520 Speaker 1: that person more than they did before, more than they 950 00:52:51,520 --> 00:52:53,960 Speaker 1: did if they didn't do the person a favor. The 951 00:52:53,960 --> 00:52:57,279 Speaker 1: Bin Franklin effect was supported by the experiment, but there 952 00:52:57,280 --> 00:53:00,919 Speaker 1: are some interesting nuggets. First of all, did not help 953 00:53:00,960 --> 00:53:03,399 Speaker 1: for a person to ask for a favor through an 954 00:53:03,440 --> 00:53:06,680 Speaker 1: intermediary or have somebody else ask for a favor on 955 00:53:06,760 --> 00:53:11,839 Speaker 1: your behalf? Only asking directly seemed to create the effect here. Well, 956 00:53:11,840 --> 00:53:14,080 Speaker 1: that that would make sense, like that is the formation 957 00:53:14,080 --> 00:53:17,200 Speaker 1: of the social bond must be a person to person. Yeah, 958 00:53:17,239 --> 00:53:19,839 Speaker 1: I think that sort of makes sense. Uh. The experimenters 959 00:53:19,960 --> 00:53:24,040 Speaker 1: also manipulated the magnitude of the favor to see if 960 00:53:24,080 --> 00:53:27,360 Speaker 1: this made a difference. Does doing somebody a bigger favor 961 00:53:27,400 --> 00:53:30,560 Speaker 1: make you like them more than doing them a smaller favor. 962 00:53:30,960 --> 00:53:34,359 Speaker 1: They called this the magnitude of concession hypothesis, and they 963 00:53:34,400 --> 00:53:36,680 Speaker 1: expected it to be the case, but they were wrong. 964 00:53:37,160 --> 00:53:39,480 Speaker 1: It appears that if I ask you for a favor 965 00:53:39,480 --> 00:53:41,759 Speaker 1: and you do it for me, you will probably like 966 00:53:41,880 --> 00:53:43,799 Speaker 1: me more than you did before. But there is no 967 00:53:43,880 --> 00:53:46,640 Speaker 1: evidence that doing me a bigger favor makes you like 968 00:53:46,760 --> 00:53:49,640 Speaker 1: me more than doing a smaller favor would. So, based 969 00:53:49,640 --> 00:53:51,399 Speaker 1: on the study, I think it makes sense if you're 970 00:53:51,400 --> 00:53:53,200 Speaker 1: trying to get somebody to like you, ask them to 971 00:53:53,239 --> 00:53:55,840 Speaker 1: do you a small favor. And of course in this 972 00:53:55,960 --> 00:53:58,879 Speaker 1: I know everybody is now thinking back to times that 973 00:53:59,239 --> 00:54:01,480 Speaker 1: friends and co are or has asked small favors. H 974 00:54:01,600 --> 00:54:04,760 Speaker 1: and your your second guessing and wondering if they were 975 00:54:04,760 --> 00:54:07,080 Speaker 1: gaming you? Were they gaming you? Yes, it's like they've 976 00:54:07,080 --> 00:54:09,520 Speaker 1: got me. They didn't want to read that book, they 977 00:54:09,560 --> 00:54:13,280 Speaker 1: just wanted to mess with me. Uh so interesting question 978 00:54:13,360 --> 00:54:16,319 Speaker 1: like this does appear to be empirically true. If it 979 00:54:16,400 --> 00:54:20,279 Speaker 1: is in fact a robust effect and generalizable, what explains it? 980 00:54:20,440 --> 00:54:23,040 Speaker 1: Why are we like this? There are a couple of 981 00:54:23,080 --> 00:54:27,080 Speaker 1: main explanations that have been floated. One is just sort 982 00:54:27,080 --> 00:54:30,359 Speaker 1: of like a social effection that the act of requesting 983 00:54:30,400 --> 00:54:33,400 Speaker 1: a favor humanizes you in the eyes of a person 984 00:54:33,480 --> 00:54:36,040 Speaker 1: to whom you made the request, Like it makes you 985 00:54:36,080 --> 00:54:39,800 Speaker 1: just appear more sympathetic if you come asking for something. 986 00:54:40,040 --> 00:54:42,200 Speaker 1: This This makes perfect sense because I feel like when 987 00:54:42,239 --> 00:54:47,600 Speaker 1: we dislike someone, we tend to formulate a very simple 988 00:54:47,680 --> 00:54:50,319 Speaker 1: model of who they are and what they're about, and 989 00:54:50,360 --> 00:54:53,160 Speaker 1: generally it will boil down to, like, you know, a 990 00:54:53,200 --> 00:54:57,440 Speaker 1: few impulses or ideas regarding their personality or character, and 991 00:54:57,560 --> 00:55:00,920 Speaker 1: this adds a a mundane l em in into the mix. 992 00:55:01,120 --> 00:55:04,200 Speaker 1: That is, it's perhaps is like adding adding water to 993 00:55:04,239 --> 00:55:09,239 Speaker 1: a strong beverage delotes the UH the poison a bit. Yeah. 994 00:55:09,280 --> 00:55:10,960 Speaker 1: I think that's a good way of explaining it. And 995 00:55:11,000 --> 00:55:14,600 Speaker 1: I think this explanation is somewhat supported by by some 996 00:55:14,680 --> 00:55:17,879 Speaker 1: of the research, but not all of it. There's another explanation, 997 00:55:18,360 --> 00:55:22,719 Speaker 1: which is the cognitive dissonance explanation. Basically, the idea here 998 00:55:22,800 --> 00:55:27,240 Speaker 1: is that it's hard to mentally reconcile having done something 999 00:55:27,360 --> 00:55:30,600 Speaker 1: nice for somebody you think you don't like. So the 1000 00:55:30,680 --> 00:55:34,840 Speaker 1: brain resolves this incongruity by updating its opinion of the 1001 00:55:34,880 --> 00:55:38,520 Speaker 1: recipient in a positive way. Okay, that makes sense. Now 1002 00:55:38,520 --> 00:55:40,680 Speaker 1: we'll come back to these explanations in a minute. I 1003 00:55:40,719 --> 00:55:43,520 Speaker 1: just wanted to look real quickly at another study that 1004 00:55:43,719 --> 00:55:48,000 Speaker 1: investigated the Ben Franklin effect. This was by you Nia 1005 00:55:48,480 --> 00:55:51,239 Speaker 1: in the Journal of Social Psychology in twenty sixteen. Does 1006 00:55:51,280 --> 00:55:54,680 Speaker 1: a favor request increase liking towards the requester? Uh? And 1007 00:55:54,760 --> 00:55:57,560 Speaker 1: this found more evidence of the Ben Franklin effect. Quote. 1008 00:55:57,840 --> 00:56:01,359 Speaker 1: In an experiment, both Japanese and American participants who were 1009 00:56:01,360 --> 00:56:04,719 Speaker 1: asked for help from a confederate increase their liking of 1010 00:56:04,760 --> 00:56:08,520 Speaker 1: the confederate relative to the baseline social impression of the 1011 00:56:08,560 --> 00:56:12,680 Speaker 1: confederate and perceive closeness of the relationship also increased relative 1012 00:56:12,719 --> 00:56:16,560 Speaker 1: to baseline. However, there was an interesting twist. There was 1013 00:56:16,640 --> 00:56:20,000 Speaker 1: no measurable increase when you do a favor for somebody 1014 00:56:20,080 --> 00:56:23,319 Speaker 1: without them asking, So it seemed like at least in 1015 00:56:23,360 --> 00:56:26,319 Speaker 1: this experiment, again, might not be generalizable, but in this 1016 00:56:26,440 --> 00:56:29,760 Speaker 1: study it was the act of asking for the favor 1017 00:56:29,840 --> 00:56:32,840 Speaker 1: that was crucially important in securing the change of attitude. 1018 00:56:32,840 --> 00:56:35,760 Speaker 1: If you just do somebody a favor without them asking, 1019 00:56:35,800 --> 00:56:38,440 Speaker 1: it doesn't seem to change anything alright, So so it's 1020 00:56:38,440 --> 00:56:41,320 Speaker 1: not for instance, if you come up to your boss 1021 00:56:41,320 --> 00:56:42,880 Speaker 1: and you're like, hey, here's here's a good book. You 1022 00:56:42,880 --> 00:56:44,919 Speaker 1: should read this, you should borrow it. Yeah, I'm gonna 1023 00:56:45,000 --> 00:56:46,480 Speaker 1: lend it to you, not going to have the same 1024 00:56:46,520 --> 00:56:48,839 Speaker 1: effect if the boss came to you and said, hey, 1025 00:56:48,840 --> 00:56:51,279 Speaker 1: can I buy that book? Right, If this one is 1026 00:56:51,320 --> 00:56:53,560 Speaker 1: the more generalizable effect, it would be that you're you're 1027 00:56:53,560 --> 00:56:57,000 Speaker 1: more likely to like the boss more if they ask you. Um, 1028 00:56:57,120 --> 00:56:59,920 Speaker 1: So these effects would seem to support the humanization at 1029 00:57:00,000 --> 00:57:04,080 Speaker 1: explanation rather than the cognitive dissonance reduction explanation. But there's 1030 00:57:04,160 --> 00:57:06,920 Speaker 1: other research in favor of the general idea behind the 1031 00:57:06,960 --> 00:57:10,759 Speaker 1: cognitive dissonance reduction interpretation, showing that we tend to form 1032 00:57:10,840 --> 00:57:14,160 Speaker 1: our opinions of people in ways that justify the ways 1033 00:57:14,280 --> 00:57:18,320 Speaker 1: we have already treated them. For example, there are studies 1034 00:57:18,320 --> 00:57:21,720 Speaker 1: showing that if you force people by experimental conditions to 1035 00:57:22,080 --> 00:57:25,080 Speaker 1: insult and say mean things to a person's face, you 1036 00:57:25,120 --> 00:57:28,000 Speaker 1: will subsequently find that the people who were forced to 1037 00:57:28,000 --> 00:57:30,880 Speaker 1: say the mean things, like the people they insulted less 1038 00:57:30,880 --> 00:57:34,919 Speaker 1: than they did before, less than they would on average otherwise. Um, 1039 00:57:35,080 --> 00:57:39,080 Speaker 1: and so I think this fits pretty well with everyday experience, 1040 00:57:39,120 --> 00:57:42,760 Speaker 1: like how often have you noticed Bob do something thoughtlessly 1041 00:57:42,840 --> 00:57:46,040 Speaker 1: harmful to Jeff and then afterwards, when forced to think 1042 00:57:46,080 --> 00:57:48,560 Speaker 1: about the fact that he did something harmful to Jeff, 1043 00:57:49,040 --> 00:57:52,200 Speaker 1: subsequently like start coming up with reasons why Jeff is 1044 00:57:52,240 --> 00:57:54,640 Speaker 1: trash and he deserved it. And I feel like I've 1045 00:57:54,760 --> 00:57:57,680 Speaker 1: I've read examples of this in workplace scenarios as well, 1046 00:57:57,760 --> 00:58:02,120 Speaker 1: like what happens when employers are you know, forced to 1047 00:58:02,240 --> 00:58:07,200 Speaker 1: some degree to employee harsher measures on employees, such as 1048 00:58:07,240 --> 00:58:10,280 Speaker 1: headcount reductions or you know, the removal of benefits that 1049 00:58:10,360 --> 00:58:13,240 Speaker 1: sort of thing, And then like there's this sometimes there's 1050 00:58:13,240 --> 00:58:16,600 Speaker 1: this justification process that moves in that's exactly like this, right, 1051 00:58:16,680 --> 00:58:21,400 Speaker 1: you justify your maltreatment by revising your opinions of these 1052 00:58:21,400 --> 00:58:24,320 Speaker 1: people and making them seem worse in your own mind. 1053 00:58:24,760 --> 00:58:27,520 Speaker 1: And that would fit with the cognitive dissonance reduction model. 1054 00:58:27,840 --> 00:58:29,960 Speaker 1: And if that model of the Bin Franklin effect has 1055 00:58:29,960 --> 00:58:31,840 Speaker 1: any truth to it, I think it would seem to 1056 00:58:31,880 --> 00:58:34,840 Speaker 1: fit with models of the self similar to like Michael 1057 00:58:34,880 --> 00:58:38,840 Speaker 1: Kazaniga and Joseph LaDou's left brain interpreter theory, the idea 1058 00:58:38,960 --> 00:58:41,840 Speaker 1: that our self comes from a part of the brain 1059 00:58:41,880 --> 00:58:45,760 Speaker 1: in the left hemisphere that observes our behavior and then 1060 00:58:45,920 --> 00:58:49,080 Speaker 1: tells itself a story to try to make sense of it. 1061 00:58:49,320 --> 00:58:53,520 Speaker 1: In other words, you don't cause your actions, your body acts, 1062 00:58:53,880 --> 00:58:56,880 Speaker 1: and then you tell yourself a narrative to make sense 1063 00:58:56,920 --> 00:58:58,520 Speaker 1: of it. Well, you know, this is one of those 1064 00:58:58,520 --> 00:59:00,640 Speaker 1: things where you you you can apply lie this to 1065 00:59:00,720 --> 00:59:04,720 Speaker 1: the mistreatment of of any group of people throughout history, 1066 00:59:04,760 --> 00:59:06,280 Speaker 1: and you can see this kind of how this kind 1067 00:59:06,280 --> 00:59:08,800 Speaker 1: of feedback effect works. Oh yeah, I think that this 1068 00:59:08,920 --> 00:59:12,560 Speaker 1: absolutely has broad like social and political ramifications. You can 1069 00:59:12,600 --> 00:59:16,520 Speaker 1: see it happening when when when one group inflicts pain 1070 00:59:16,640 --> 00:59:20,840 Speaker 1: on another group, there's often an accompanying dehumanization of the 1071 00:59:20,880 --> 00:59:23,840 Speaker 1: group that's getting the pain inflicted on them. And I 1072 00:59:23,840 --> 00:59:26,800 Speaker 1: think that's that's probably a cognitive dissonance reduction thing. It's 1073 00:59:26,840 --> 00:59:30,880 Speaker 1: coming up with narratives that justify the bad behavior. And 1074 00:59:31,160 --> 00:59:34,080 Speaker 1: uh so, yeah, when when your actions and your feelings 1075 00:59:34,120 --> 00:59:37,640 Speaker 1: about a person don't match up, one solution under this 1076 00:59:37,720 --> 00:59:40,840 Speaker 1: theory to reduce this friction in your brain is just 1077 00:59:40,880 --> 00:59:43,040 Speaker 1: to update your feelings about the person. So if you 1078 00:59:43,080 --> 00:59:46,320 Speaker 1: treated somebody nice, you start to like them more. If 1079 00:59:46,360 --> 00:59:49,760 Speaker 1: you treated somebody bad, you start to like them less. Now, 1080 00:59:49,760 --> 00:59:51,959 Speaker 1: bringing it all back to the to the subject matter 1081 00:59:52,000 --> 00:59:53,760 Speaker 1: at hand, why did I bring this up in the 1082 00:59:53,760 --> 00:59:57,880 Speaker 1: context of discussing gratitude. It's simply because I was wondering 1083 00:59:58,120 --> 01:00:05,160 Speaker 1: if practicing attitude interventions generalizes the Ben Franklin effect by 1084 01:00:05,200 --> 01:00:09,280 Speaker 1: turning it inward, if by like observing the ways that 1085 01:00:09,320 --> 01:00:13,560 Speaker 1: the world has treated you nicely, that it can have 1086 01:00:13,680 --> 01:00:17,640 Speaker 1: positive psychological effects by sort of like self been Franklin 1087 01:00:17,760 --> 01:00:21,080 Speaker 1: ng and seeing yourself as well, maybe there are ways 1088 01:00:21,120 --> 01:00:23,840 Speaker 1: in which I'm worthy of good fortune. All right, so 1089 01:00:23,920 --> 01:00:28,600 Speaker 1: instead of suddenly changing your opinion, I've been Franklin? Who 1090 01:00:28,680 --> 01:00:31,560 Speaker 1: who asked for this? The lending of this book. Yeah, 1091 01:00:31,600 --> 01:00:35,320 Speaker 1: you feel better about the world, about individuals, about you know, 1092 01:00:35,640 --> 01:00:41,560 Speaker 1: these various mundane and cosmic forces that we contemplate when 1093 01:00:41,600 --> 01:00:45,320 Speaker 1: we exercise gratitude. Yeah, exactly. So I'm not sure that 1094 01:00:45,320 --> 01:00:47,440 Speaker 1: that's what's operative here, but I wonder about that, and 1095 01:00:47,560 --> 01:00:50,920 Speaker 1: I would be interested if somebody could could find ways 1096 01:00:50,960 --> 01:00:55,000 Speaker 1: to like test this explanation hypothesis sort of is practicing 1097 01:00:55,040 --> 01:00:59,560 Speaker 1: gratitude does it lead to cognitive dissonance reduction strategies in 1098 01:00:59,600 --> 01:01:04,440 Speaker 1: the brain that resolve toward an updated view of self 1099 01:01:04,440 --> 01:01:07,400 Speaker 1: worth and and uh, you know, and and fitting in 1100 01:01:07,480 --> 01:01:09,960 Speaker 1: with the cosmic order and with your friends and family 1101 01:01:10,080 --> 01:01:13,720 Speaker 1: and all everything else around you. But then again, I mean, 1102 01:01:13,760 --> 01:01:16,600 Speaker 1: I think this is we already mentioned this, but it's 1103 01:01:16,640 --> 01:01:19,320 Speaker 1: complicated by the fact that, at the same time that 1104 01:01:19,320 --> 01:01:22,200 Speaker 1: gratitude seems to increase feelings of self worth, it like 1105 01:01:22,320 --> 01:01:27,080 Speaker 1: specifically also asks you to not feel like you deserve 1106 01:01:27,200 --> 01:01:29,400 Speaker 1: everything good that's ever happened to you and you know 1107 01:01:29,480 --> 01:01:32,400 Speaker 1: you just earned it all on your own. Uh. And 1108 01:01:32,480 --> 01:01:34,960 Speaker 1: I think it's that tension that makes gratitude such an 1109 01:01:35,000 --> 01:01:38,080 Speaker 1: interesting emotion. Yeah. Yeah, And you know, I know that 1110 01:01:38,360 --> 01:01:40,160 Speaker 1: some people listening to this might think, all right, now 1111 01:01:40,200 --> 01:01:43,400 Speaker 1: I have all these selfish reasons to engage in gratitude. 1112 01:01:43,680 --> 01:01:46,200 Speaker 1: But on one hand, that's fine, because we were talking 1113 01:01:46,240 --> 01:01:49,880 Speaker 1: about with this feedback between you know, between between action 1114 01:01:49,920 --> 01:01:53,120 Speaker 1: and thought and uh and so forth. It's like, even 1115 01:01:53,160 --> 01:01:56,960 Speaker 1: if your initial motivation is self selfish, it it feels 1116 01:01:56,960 --> 01:02:00,320 Speaker 1: as if the uh, you know, the complex and play 1117 01:02:00,520 --> 01:02:04,440 Speaker 1: here will take over. Um, you may enter into it selfishly, 1118 01:02:04,480 --> 01:02:08,160 Speaker 1: but then you know, assuming you know uh, you know, 1119 01:02:08,280 --> 01:02:13,400 Speaker 1: typical neurological conditions here, the gratitude will take over like 1120 01:02:13,480 --> 01:02:17,200 Speaker 1: the the the effects seems to be potent enough uh 1121 01:02:17,240 --> 01:02:20,960 Speaker 1: and and part of the human experience in a broad sense, 1122 01:02:21,600 --> 01:02:23,880 Speaker 1: so that you you know, for whatever reason you say 1123 01:02:24,000 --> 01:02:26,720 Speaker 1: yes to it, uh, it will do its thing once 1124 01:02:26,760 --> 01:02:30,240 Speaker 1: you let it into you totally gratitude, humility, fake it 1125 01:02:30,320 --> 01:02:32,640 Speaker 1: till you make it. Yeah. Yeah. Well of course the 1126 01:02:32,680 --> 01:02:36,040 Speaker 1: other thing too is that we speak of gratitude exercises, 1127 01:02:36,080 --> 01:02:38,560 Speaker 1: and I think you can think of them like exercise. 1128 01:02:38,880 --> 01:02:41,040 Speaker 1: You don't want to run on a treadmill once a 1129 01:02:41,120 --> 01:02:45,360 Speaker 1: year at the end of Thanksgiving, right you? You? And likewise, 1130 01:02:45,400 --> 01:02:49,200 Speaker 1: you don't want to just exercise gratitude once a year 1131 01:02:49,400 --> 01:02:51,600 Speaker 1: or twice or a year or whatever, like most of 1132 01:02:51,640 --> 01:02:53,880 Speaker 1: the research seems to say that it it needs to 1133 01:02:53,880 --> 01:02:57,080 Speaker 1: be something that is engaged with on a regular basis. Uh, 1134 01:02:57,560 --> 01:03:00,240 Speaker 1: you know, it's to sort of refresh the psyche. I 1135 01:03:00,240 --> 01:03:03,760 Speaker 1: will say this is one where the the overall gist 1136 01:03:03,760 --> 01:03:07,240 Speaker 1: of the research fits very much with my own anecdotal experience. 1137 01:03:07,320 --> 01:03:10,440 Speaker 1: I I try whenever I remember, and I just succeed 1138 01:03:10,440 --> 01:03:14,200 Speaker 1: pretty often to actively practice gratitude. Uh. And I guess 1139 01:03:14,200 --> 01:03:15,919 Speaker 1: this won't be unusual to a lot of people who 1140 01:03:15,920 --> 01:03:18,560 Speaker 1: have like religious practices where the regularly, you know, like 1141 01:03:18,640 --> 01:03:21,840 Speaker 1: pray and thank God for their blessings or some equivalent 1142 01:03:21,880 --> 01:03:24,400 Speaker 1: of that. Uh. You know. I I do a secular 1143 01:03:24,480 --> 01:03:26,880 Speaker 1: kind of thing. I like to just when I can 1144 01:03:27,000 --> 01:03:30,080 Speaker 1: remember to write down or say out loud nice things 1145 01:03:30,120 --> 01:03:33,520 Speaker 1: that I have benefited from and recognize them and take stock. 1146 01:03:33,560 --> 01:03:36,480 Speaker 1: And I will say it is a in my experience, 1147 01:03:36,520 --> 01:03:41,520 Speaker 1: an extremely useful psychologically cleansing exercise. Yeah. And in our household, 1148 01:03:41,600 --> 01:03:44,360 Speaker 1: we regularly have family meetings where he should we go 1149 01:03:44,400 --> 01:03:46,200 Speaker 1: around and you have to say hi, you have to say, 1150 01:03:46,560 --> 01:03:47,920 Speaker 1: you know, what was the highlight of your day, what 1151 01:03:48,000 --> 01:03:50,560 Speaker 1: was the challenge of your day, and also what are 1152 01:03:50,560 --> 01:03:52,800 Speaker 1: you looking forward to and what are you thankful for 1153 01:03:53,160 --> 01:03:55,040 Speaker 1: and uh, And I think that's a good good way 1154 01:03:55,080 --> 01:03:57,160 Speaker 1: to go about it, particularly if you have a you know, 1155 01:03:57,240 --> 01:04:00,880 Speaker 1: family scenario and you know, perhaps a a small child, 1156 01:04:00,960 --> 01:04:04,720 Speaker 1: Like that's a level of of a thankfulness exercise that 1157 01:04:04,800 --> 01:04:08,120 Speaker 1: I think is very achievable. I think that's probably I mean, 1158 01:04:08,200 --> 01:04:10,560 Speaker 1: I'm not a child psychologist or anything, but I think 1159 01:04:10,560 --> 01:04:12,960 Speaker 1: that's got to be incredibly important for a child to 1160 01:04:13,000 --> 01:04:15,720 Speaker 1: see that kind of behavior modeled and to participate in it. 1161 01:04:16,440 --> 01:04:19,560 Speaker 1: I mean, as we were saying earlier, like, there's nothing 1162 01:04:19,560 --> 01:04:23,640 Speaker 1: more disgusting than seeing a really ungrateful child, Like even 1163 01:04:23,640 --> 01:04:25,440 Speaker 1: though you know, we were all like that where because 1164 01:04:25,520 --> 01:04:27,560 Speaker 1: we had those of you observe a child at some 1165 01:04:27,640 --> 01:04:30,040 Speaker 1: point or another, you will observe an ungrateful child because 1166 01:04:30,040 --> 01:04:32,320 Speaker 1: they are they are learning all of this social complexity. 1167 01:04:32,360 --> 01:04:34,880 Speaker 1: It's a natural tendency. But it's one of the gratefulness 1168 01:04:34,920 --> 01:04:36,800 Speaker 1: I think is one of the most important things for 1169 01:04:36,880 --> 01:04:42,320 Speaker 1: children to be socialized into as early as possible. Yeah, alright, 1170 01:04:42,640 --> 01:04:45,040 Speaker 1: we're gonna go and close it up there. But you know, 1171 01:04:45,040 --> 01:04:48,400 Speaker 1: obviously this is an episode that everyone is going to 1172 01:04:48,440 --> 01:04:50,120 Speaker 1: have some feedback on, so we would love to hear 1173 01:04:50,280 --> 01:04:52,880 Speaker 1: from everyone else. About your relationship with gratitude, I think 1174 01:04:52,920 --> 01:04:55,920 Speaker 1: about it, Uh, your relationship with Thanksgiving even you know, 1175 01:04:55,920 --> 01:05:00,520 Speaker 1: hopefully we've provided some you know, from food for thought 1176 01:05:01,080 --> 01:05:04,720 Speaker 1: as you engage in this year's feast. In the meantime, 1177 01:05:04,760 --> 01:05:06,480 Speaker 1: if you want to check out other episodes of Stuff 1178 01:05:06,520 --> 01:05:08,160 Speaker 1: to Blow your Mind, he don't know, the Stuff to 1179 01:05:08,160 --> 01:05:09,840 Speaker 1: Blow your Mind dot com, that's where we'll find them all. 1180 01:05:09,880 --> 01:05:12,480 Speaker 1: You also find them wherever you get your podcasts and 1181 01:05:12,520 --> 01:05:15,600 Speaker 1: wherever that happens to be. Just make sure you subscribe 1182 01:05:16,000 --> 01:05:18,560 Speaker 1: to ensure you get future episodes, and also leave us 1183 01:05:18,560 --> 01:05:22,040 Speaker 1: a nice review if you like that. That helps us out. Um, 1184 01:05:22,120 --> 01:05:24,800 Speaker 1: all of you wanted to check out our other show, Invention, Uh, 1185 01:05:24,840 --> 01:05:27,560 Speaker 1: that's an invention pot dot com. And indeed Benjamin Franklin 1186 01:05:27,560 --> 01:05:29,840 Speaker 1: I think has shown up in some episodes there as well. 1187 01:05:30,480 --> 01:05:32,960 Speaker 1: And if you want a little uh sci fi horror 1188 01:05:33,040 --> 01:05:37,000 Speaker 1: for your holiday listening the second oil age. All the 1189 01:05:37,040 --> 01:05:39,200 Speaker 1: episodes are out so you can binge that puppy now. 1190 01:05:39,400 --> 01:05:41,920 Speaker 1: Oh in shirts, I should also mention, uh, if you 1191 01:05:41,960 --> 01:05:43,560 Speaker 1: go to Stuff to Blow your Mind dot com, you'll 1192 01:05:43,600 --> 01:05:47,160 Speaker 1: find a tab for our merch store, and indeed there 1193 01:05:47,200 --> 01:05:50,600 Speaker 1: are shirts there with things like squirrels and basilists and 1194 01:05:50,600 --> 01:05:53,560 Speaker 1: our logo, and there's a new shirt as well as 1195 01:05:53,600 --> 01:05:55,760 Speaker 1: kind of a treasure map to kind of scenario. I 1196 01:05:55,760 --> 01:05:59,320 Speaker 1: think I think it was from our Sea Monster Monster 1197 01:05:59,600 --> 01:06:02,120 Speaker 1: Sema shirt, so a new one of those to check out. 1198 01:06:02,120 --> 01:06:05,040 Speaker 1: And I believe there are some Thanksgiving Black Friday deals 1199 01:06:05,080 --> 01:06:07,120 Speaker 1: in play as well, so now's a good time to 1200 01:06:07,160 --> 01:06:10,000 Speaker 1: pick something up if you are so inclined, Absolutely dive 1201 01:06:10,040 --> 01:06:12,600 Speaker 1: into the merch pit and mash as hard as you can. 1202 01:06:12,920 --> 01:06:14,760 Speaker 1: And of course one more thing, since we were talking 1203 01:06:14,760 --> 01:06:18,320 Speaker 1: about gratitude, really have to express our gratitude to you, 1204 01:06:18,520 --> 01:06:22,800 Speaker 1: the listeners, because without you, none of this is really possible. 1205 01:06:23,440 --> 01:06:27,000 Speaker 1: It's true though, uh and I as always express my 1206 01:06:27,040 --> 01:06:30,480 Speaker 1: great gratitude, our great gratitude to our excellent audio producer 1207 01:06:30,520 --> 01:06:33,760 Speaker 1: Seth Nicholas Johnson, who makes it all possible. Absolutely. If 1208 01:06:33,760 --> 01:06:35,240 Speaker 1: you would like to get in touch with us with 1209 01:06:35,320 --> 01:06:37,880 Speaker 1: feedback on this episode or any other, to suggest a 1210 01:06:37,920 --> 01:06:40,120 Speaker 1: topic for the future, or just to say hello, you 1211 01:06:40,160 --> 01:06:43,040 Speaker 1: can email us at contact at stuff to Blow your 1212 01:06:43,040 --> 01:06:52,240 Speaker 1: Mind dot com. Stuff to Blow Your Mind is a 1213 01:06:52,280 --> 01:06:55,040 Speaker 1: production of iHeart Radio's How Stuff Works. For more podcasts 1214 01:06:55,040 --> 01:06:57,960 Speaker 1: from my Heart Radio is the iHeart Radio, app, Apple podcasts, 1215 01:06:58,080 --> 01:07:02,760 Speaker 1: or wherever you listen to your favorite shows. Very little 1216 01:07:04,240 --> 01:07:15,720 Speaker 1: by point four starts four foo