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Speaker 1: Time now for today's Strawberry Letter and listen. If you

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Speaker 1: need advice and relationships, dating, work, sex, parenting, and more.

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Speaker 1: Please submit your Strawberry Letter to Steve HARVEYFM dot com

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Speaker 1: and click submit Strawberry Letter. We could be reading your

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Speaker 1: letter live on the air, just like we're gonna read

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Speaker 1: this right here, right now today. Yeah, bug a lapotol

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Speaker 1: on tight, We got it for you. Here. It is

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Speaker 1: the Strawberry Letter. Thank enough you subject. I found out

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Speaker 1: that I married a drunk dear Stephen Shirley. My husband

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Speaker 1: and I got married in January, and I relocated to

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Speaker 1: be with him after the wedding. We dated for two

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Speaker 1: years in a long distance relationship before we got married.

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Speaker 1: When I moved in with him, I found out he

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Speaker 1: is a split personality. To my surprise, he used cocaine

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Speaker 1: recreationally and he's a binge drinker. I never saw this

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Speaker 1: side of him when we were dating. The truth came

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Speaker 1: out on our wedding day. He's started drinking midday and

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Speaker 1: looked like he was high. At the wedding. His speech

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Speaker 1: was so slurred that no one could understand his vows.

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Speaker 1: He admitted to doing a little cocaine before the wedding.

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Speaker 1: He said it would never happen again, but he said

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Speaker 1: he would not give up alcohol. I do not have

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Speaker 1: a problem with alcohol. If he drinks in moderation when

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Speaker 1: we're home, he will have a few beers that leads

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Speaker 1: to bourbon or scotch. Later on. He was moving. He

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Speaker 1: was mowing our lawn over the weekend, and he had

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Speaker 1: a beer in his hand when he walks my dog.

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Speaker 1: He walks around the neighborhood with the red solo cup

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Speaker 1: full of bourbon. The flip side is that he is

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Speaker 1: an executive at a company and his drinking does not

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Speaker 1: interfere with his job. He's in three civic groups and

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Speaker 1: he's able to have a single glass of scotch at

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Speaker 1: these social events. He chooses to be a sloppy drunk

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Speaker 1: whenever he's with me. Though. I finally confronted him and

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Speaker 1: asked him about the drinking. He said it's because he

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Speaker 1: got married and it was a big life change. He said,

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Speaker 1: he loves me, but when I moved in, his life

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Speaker 1: turned upside down and he needs time to adjust. How

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Speaker 1: am I supposed to handle this? Should I get this

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Speaker 1: marriage annulled now? Or is this just a phase that

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Speaker 1: we can work through. I think, Steve, this is a

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Speaker 1: second time time in like two weeks, we've had a

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Speaker 1: letter about a functioning alcoholic or something. Right, Yeah, anyway,

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Speaker 1: this is a shame. You know that you've been with

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Speaker 1: him for two years and you just recently found out

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Speaker 1: that your brand new husband is an alcoholic. I think

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Speaker 1: if you guys didn't live in a so far apart

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Speaker 1: or it weren't in a long distance relationship, you probably

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Speaker 1: would have found out. I found out much sooner because

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Speaker 1: he wouldn't have been able to keep it this long.

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Speaker 1: I mean, I understand, though you're giving him a pass

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Speaker 1: on your wedding day because you could chalk that up

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Speaker 1: to nervousness. You could chalk that up to nervousness. But

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Speaker 1: he does cocaine too. This is a mess right here,

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Speaker 1: It really is. I mean, what sober wife wants to

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Speaker 1: deal with something like this, This is craziness. He needs

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Speaker 1: to commit I mean, you know he committed to you

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Speaker 1: in marriage. But what he needs to commit to doing

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Speaker 1: is getting some help, and getting some help immediately. This

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Speaker 1: is not a phase he's going through. I don't care

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Speaker 1: how well he can perform on his job or or

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Speaker 1: in these civic groups. He only has one glass of scotch.

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Speaker 1: This is a deal breaker. Okay, this is not a phase.

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Speaker 1: This is a deal breaker. Drugs and alcohol have no

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Speaker 1: place in a marriage. They have no place in a marriage.

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Speaker 1: And that's all I'm gonna say about it. You need

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Speaker 1: to make the decision whether you're gonna stay with him

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Speaker 1: or not. If it were me, I would have been gone.

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Speaker 1: I'm just gonna tell you that, Steve, I found out

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Speaker 1: I was married to a drunk. You relocated after the wedding,

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Speaker 1: after you all dated for two years in a long

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Speaker 1: distance relationship, and then when you moved in you found

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Speaker 1: out he had a split personality. Simple split personality. Simple

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Speaker 1: explanation for this. You didn't know the man, like Shirley said,

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Speaker 1: the long distance relationship. You just didn't know the man

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Speaker 1: you thought you did. And to my surprise, he used

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Speaker 1: cocaine recreationally and he's a being drinking so here, alcoholic, aner,

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Speaker 1: junk all that. Oh you got everything, alcoholic here, drunk,

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Speaker 1: aner junkie. I never saw this side of him when

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Speaker 1: we were dating because you was long distance. But the

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Speaker 1: truth came out on the wedding day. He started drinking

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Speaker 1: mid day were led to the evening four thirty, five thirty,

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Speaker 1: but it knew he was tossing, and we're about to

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Speaker 1: find out why. He admitted he said, you said that

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Speaker 1: he looked a little high at the wind excuse me

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Speaker 1: at the wedding. His speech was so slurred nobody could

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Speaker 1: understand this. Hut there you're the husband. Now do you

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Speaker 1: swear promise yea, do my duty to do my best?

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Speaker 1: Boy boy scout botance this duty? He doing all other

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Speaker 1: counter there the leader to the flame, United States of

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Speaker 1: miricle boy shut up to make your wed and uh,

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Speaker 1: but he said it would never happen again. Now check

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Speaker 1: this out. But he said he would never give up alcohol.

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Speaker 1: So what he meant to say was I'll never give

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Speaker 1: up drinking. Yeah, that's what that statement is. Yeah, I

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Speaker 1: don't have a problem with alcohol if he drinks in moderation.

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Speaker 1: In moderation, he can't. Didn't you say he have a

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Speaker 1: solo cup full of liquor walking the dog. That's a

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Speaker 1: big ass cup. Oh yeah, everybody, I see where the

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Speaker 1: red cup is drinking. And they had to hang on. Steve,

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Speaker 1: we'll have part two of your response coming up. At

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Speaker 1: twenty three minutes after the hour. Today's Strawberry letter, I

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Speaker 1: found out that I married a drunk. We'll get back

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Speaker 1: into it right after this. You're listening, all right, Steve.

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Speaker 1: Come on, let's recap today's Strawberry Letters subject. I found

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Speaker 1: out that I married a drunk. Wow. In a long

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Speaker 1: distance relationship with this man for two years, they finally

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Speaker 1: getting married. She relocates, find out that he's a bear's

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Speaker 1: drinker and he uses recreational cocaine. She didn't know none

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Speaker 1: of this because it was a long distant relationship, but

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Speaker 1: it came. Truth came out at the wed and because

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Speaker 1: around me and Dad the wey and he started drinking.

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Speaker 1: His speech was so slurred. Ain't nobody know what he said?

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Speaker 1: And he couldn't say the vials? He did several vials

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Speaker 1: and none of them was wedding VI. Shame. This is

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Speaker 1: this is him at the wed and trying to think

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Speaker 1: of his why. Once upon a midnight dreary as I

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Speaker 1: ponded a weaker, we're re puzsitive by single query, which

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Speaker 1: your mongst the Greeks to you, you can do this

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Speaker 1: a fraternity point. Stop that stop that wow out of

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Speaker 1: the night, that covers me black as peered from Polo.

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Speaker 1: Shut up. Ain't whatever the gods drink's gonna say that.

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Speaker 1: Your files say your files pledgure legiance to the flag

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Speaker 1: United States. That's the plesure legiance. I promised to do

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Speaker 1: my duty, to do my best to God and my pot.

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Speaker 1: So now the wedding was offer. He promised. He never

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Speaker 1: he admitted he did some cocaine before to win. Anyway,

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Speaker 1: he said it never happened again, but he would not

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Speaker 1: give up drinking. Now, she says she ain't got a

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Speaker 1: problem if he drinks in moderation, But we got a

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Speaker 1: problem with his idea of moderation because when y'all got home,

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Speaker 1: he'll have a few beers that leads to a Scotch

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Speaker 1: or bourbon. Later on, when Scotch and bourbon is your chase,

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Speaker 1: him answers in trouble that night, dog, you have some bills,

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Speaker 1: and then later on he achill it with a burbon. Scott,

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Speaker 1: you're in trouble. Problem. He was mowing outline over the weekend.

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Speaker 1: He had to be in his hand and when he

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Speaker 1: walks my dog. He walked around the neighborhood with a

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Speaker 1: red solo carp full of bourbon. The flip side says,

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Speaker 1: he's an executive out of company. In his drinking doesn't

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Speaker 1: interfere with his job. He's in three civic groups and

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Speaker 1: he's able to have a single glass doesn't interfere with

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Speaker 1: his job. He's in three civic group and he's able

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Speaker 1: to have a single glass of scotch at those social events.

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Speaker 1: But when he with me, he choosing to be sloppy drunk.

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Speaker 1: So then she confronted the man. She asked him about

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Speaker 1: the drinking, and hear what he said. He said because

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Speaker 1: when he got married it was a big life change,

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Speaker 1: and he said, he loves me, but when I moved in,

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Speaker 1: his life turned upside down and he needs time. I

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Speaker 1: am to adjust. Let me translate this for you. When

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Speaker 1: he married you and his life was no longer his,

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Speaker 1: he has to get toe up to deal with it.

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Speaker 1: He got to get full when he walking y'all funking dog.

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Speaker 1: He got to be high when he cutting y'all's damn grass.

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Speaker 1: He got to be drinking when he and that watching

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Speaker 1: TV would chill his ass. Got to drink somemore, Steve,

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Speaker 1: what what you cut the yard? Hijack? Hi am I

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Speaker 1: supposed to him being in a marriage should I get

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Speaker 1: this marriage and know now? Is it just a phase

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Speaker 1: we could work through? Lady, This is not a phase.

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Speaker 1: Alcoholism is not a faith. It's not. And that's what

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Speaker 1: You've married a man that you don't know. But guess

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Speaker 1: what he said. He's not gonna give up drinking. Drinking

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Speaker 1: is a big part of your problem. Now. If you

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Speaker 1: don't really love this man and you want to get

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Speaker 1: away from it because you might have been off more

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Speaker 1: than you could you, then I suggest you get out

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Speaker 1: now because you obviously being a caretaker's not what you

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Speaker 1: signed up for. And obviously your viles, Richard Papoor's sickness

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Speaker 1: and health, all that you've really mean that it's clorosis

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Speaker 1: of the liver. Yeah, you didn't, You didn't say none

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Speaker 1: of that. You didn't. You didn't want to do you know,

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Speaker 1: you know none of the stuff that come with drinking.

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Speaker 1: So I would suggest you get out because it's not

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Speaker 1: a phase. And he's not gonna stop drinking. He's already

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Speaker 1: said it. And you're unhappy with that much drinking. And

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Speaker 1: if he don't give up the drinking, he probably ain't

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Speaker 1: gonna give up the cocaine. Yeah, And eventually he gonna

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Speaker 1: lose his job and in three civic groups. Whatever the

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Speaker 1: hell that means, that could be your only lady. Just leave.

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Speaker 1: I'd love to tell you to hand in the fight

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Speaker 1: for your marriage, but you ain't really in love with

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Speaker 1: this man. You ain't never mentioned that in here because

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Speaker 1: your answer to us was should I get this thing annulled? Right? Girl,

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Speaker 1: go ahead and do that. That's what your first mind

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Speaker 1: telling you. Tripping you move your job up there? He

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Speaker 1: just dranking his ass off. Let me ask, hypothetically, would

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Speaker 1: you marry a woman that was a drunk and dick?

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Speaker 1: Thank you? I'm having a hard enough time anyway, last

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Speaker 1: time talking to me drunk. I don't even want like

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Speaker 1: talking all the time sober. I really can't handle a

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Speaker 1: woman talking to me drunk. Y'all already talk too damn much. Naw,

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Speaker 1: you're talking and it don't make no damn sense. Uh.

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Speaker 1: Let me ask God, No, I'm not marrying a woman

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Speaker 1: that drinks, thank you, heavenly, and no other kind of way, right,

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Speaker 1: all right? Listen, post your comments on Today's Strawberry Letter

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Speaker 1: at Steve HARVEYFM dot com. That's on Instagram and Facebook,

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Speaker 1: and don't forget to check out the Strawberry Letter podcast

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Speaker 1: on demand, coming up at forty six minutes after the hour,

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Speaker 1: we'll tell you about certain Confederate monuments coming down right

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Speaker 1: after this. That's good news. You're listening to this Dave

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Speaker 1: Harvey Morning Show