1 00:00:03,240 --> 00:00:06,519 Speaker 1: Welcome to Stuff Mob Never Told You from How Supports 2 00:00:06,559 --> 00:00:14,760 Speaker 1: Not Cold. Hello, and welcome to the podcast. I'm Kristen 3 00:00:14,960 --> 00:00:17,959 Speaker 1: and I'm Caroline and it's a rather sexy week here 4 00:00:18,079 --> 00:00:22,759 Speaker 1: on Stuff Mom Never Told You. Last episode we talked 5 00:00:22,800 --> 00:00:27,400 Speaker 1: about anal sex. Yes we did, it's true. Today we're 6 00:00:27,480 --> 00:00:30,320 Speaker 1: lubing you up to talk about Loubo. Yep. There it 7 00:00:30,480 --> 00:00:34,000 Speaker 1: is slippery when wet, folks. That could be the title 8 00:00:34,040 --> 00:00:37,479 Speaker 1: of this podcast. I remember the first time, like in 9 00:00:37,560 --> 00:00:40,120 Speaker 1: pop culture, that it actually occurred to me as a 10 00:00:40,159 --> 00:00:43,559 Speaker 1: young person. What slippery when we could mean? I was 11 00:00:43,600 --> 00:00:47,840 Speaker 1: watching the Terrible Batman's sequel. I think it's the Val 12 00:00:47,920 --> 00:00:50,599 Speaker 1: Kilmer one, or is it the George Clooney one. I'm 13 00:00:50,600 --> 00:00:53,960 Speaker 1: pretty sure it's Vel Kilmer where Uma Thurman is poison 14 00:00:54,040 --> 00:00:57,600 Speaker 1: ivy and she's she there's like a flashes to a 15 00:00:57,760 --> 00:01:00,360 Speaker 1: sign in reference to her. That's the slippery and wet 16 00:01:00,400 --> 00:01:01,680 Speaker 1: and I don't I think I must have been in 17 00:01:01,720 --> 00:01:04,320 Speaker 1: like seventh grade or something. I don't know any of 18 00:01:04,319 --> 00:01:07,920 Speaker 1: these dates or statistics about Batman, but I just remember 19 00:01:07,959 --> 00:01:11,959 Speaker 1: being like, I get that, it all makes sense. It 20 00:01:11,959 --> 00:01:16,200 Speaker 1: all makes sense. Lubrication it's something sexual, yes, and it's 21 00:01:16,240 --> 00:01:20,240 Speaker 1: something that's important for us to know about and understand 22 00:01:20,480 --> 00:01:25,880 Speaker 1: and to not be ashamed to talk about or to use. Absolutely, 23 00:01:25,920 --> 00:01:29,560 Speaker 1: we need to like destigmatize lube for sure. Yeah, I mean, 24 00:01:29,600 --> 00:01:33,120 Speaker 1: because we've talked about vibrators before on the podcast obviously 25 00:01:33,520 --> 00:01:36,679 Speaker 1: with anal Sex, we talked a lot about de stigmatization. 26 00:01:37,360 --> 00:01:40,839 Speaker 1: But come to find out, with reading our sources about lubricant, 27 00:01:40,920 --> 00:01:43,880 Speaker 1: there's a lot of like self inflicted lub shaming that 28 00:01:43,959 --> 00:01:48,040 Speaker 1: goes on, and a lot of concerns that people with 29 00:01:48,160 --> 00:01:53,440 Speaker 1: vaginas have about how much our bodies make or don't 30 00:01:53,480 --> 00:01:56,520 Speaker 1: make its own lubricant. And we're going to focus more 31 00:01:56,640 --> 00:02:01,080 Speaker 1: on the store bought lubricant or this episode, but we 32 00:02:01,120 --> 00:02:04,400 Speaker 1: will get into a little bit of anatomy. But first 33 00:02:05,240 --> 00:02:10,120 Speaker 1: to sideline onto a podcast for a little while back, 34 00:02:11,000 --> 00:02:14,839 Speaker 1: let's briefly talk about Rhonda Rousey and don't worry, we're 35 00:02:14,880 --> 00:02:17,480 Speaker 1: not going to get like too personal with Ronda. However, 36 00:02:17,760 --> 00:02:23,200 Speaker 1: we have to as part of our jobs destigmatize WOOBE 37 00:02:23,280 --> 00:02:28,919 Speaker 1: and unfortunately, Rhonda Rousey is on the opposite side of things. Yeah. 38 00:02:29,040 --> 00:02:34,000 Speaker 1: So she in early November of gave an interview to 39 00:02:34,320 --> 00:02:35,959 Speaker 1: Maximum readers, and I think it was like a Q 40 00:02:36,120 --> 00:02:38,320 Speaker 1: and a of like ask Ronda questions in A thirty 41 00:02:38,360 --> 00:02:42,200 Speaker 1: six year old dude asked Rhonda what should a guy 42 00:02:42,400 --> 00:02:46,680 Speaker 1: always do in bed? And what did she say? Caroline? 43 00:02:47,400 --> 00:02:51,440 Speaker 1: In part, she said take his time. That's good advice. 44 00:02:51,720 --> 00:02:54,919 Speaker 1: Take yeah, she says in general, a girl takes a minute, 45 00:02:54,919 --> 00:02:56,760 Speaker 1: he needs to get her ready. Okay, all right, I 46 00:02:56,840 --> 00:03:01,480 Speaker 1: support that on board. However, it takes the dark shamy 47 00:03:01,560 --> 00:03:05,920 Speaker 1: turn when she says you should never need lube in 48 00:03:05,960 --> 00:03:09,360 Speaker 1: your life. If you need lube, then you're being lazy 49 00:03:09,480 --> 00:03:13,200 Speaker 1: and you're not taking your time. Randa, listen, I know 50 00:03:13,280 --> 00:03:15,960 Speaker 1: you're young, and I know that you know you're used 51 00:03:15,960 --> 00:03:18,560 Speaker 1: to smack talking your opponents as part of your game. 52 00:03:18,840 --> 00:03:22,440 Speaker 1: It's part of competition. But there is no need to 53 00:03:22,520 --> 00:03:27,640 Speaker 1: be shaming people for using lube. Don't smack talk Muscags Glands. Okay, 54 00:03:27,840 --> 00:03:30,720 Speaker 1: my Barthlon Glands. I know, come on now, nobody has 55 00:03:30,760 --> 00:03:33,160 Speaker 1: time for this. Nobody has time for Randa's lube hate. 56 00:03:33,320 --> 00:03:35,640 Speaker 1: And in I think it was it was a salon 57 00:03:35,760 --> 00:03:39,000 Speaker 1: piece that was talking about this, and the sex educators 58 00:03:39,040 --> 00:03:42,720 Speaker 1: were coming out of the woodwork to describe all of 59 00:03:42,800 --> 00:03:45,840 Speaker 1: the ways in which she was so wrong and off base. 60 00:03:46,000 --> 00:03:49,880 Speaker 1: So one of those sex educators that Salon quotes was 61 00:03:50,000 --> 00:03:52,800 Speaker 1: social worker Ada Mandalay, who said that depending on the 62 00:03:52,920 --> 00:03:56,840 Speaker 1: kind of sex being had, luke can be essential. Because 63 00:03:57,120 --> 00:03:59,960 Speaker 1: news flash, that's my note. Not all of our orifice 64 00:04:00,040 --> 00:04:04,360 Speaker 1: has produced the necessary fluids to ensure adequate slipperiness, especially 65 00:04:04,400 --> 00:04:07,960 Speaker 1: as we talked about in our last episode anal play. 66 00:04:08,320 --> 00:04:12,360 Speaker 1: There's also so many other instances when you might need 67 00:04:12,520 --> 00:04:15,040 Speaker 1: or want. Loop mentally goes on to say if someone 68 00:04:15,120 --> 00:04:18,760 Speaker 1: is undergoing cancer treatments, going through menopause, or even taking 69 00:04:18,800 --> 00:04:24,560 Speaker 1: certain medications, their natural lubrication production can dramatically change and increase. 70 00:04:25,080 --> 00:04:28,080 Speaker 1: She goes on to even mention survivors of sexual trauma 71 00:04:28,160 --> 00:04:31,680 Speaker 1: who might feel mentally ready to have sex, but their 72 00:04:31,720 --> 00:04:35,880 Speaker 1: body has become so dissociated that lubrication just isn't possible. 73 00:04:36,200 --> 00:04:38,480 Speaker 1: And she goes on to say, none of these things 74 00:04:38,560 --> 00:04:42,040 Speaker 1: that that I have listed are about people being lazy. Yeah, 75 00:04:42,080 --> 00:04:46,800 Speaker 1: I mean personal lubrication even gets down to fluctuations in 76 00:04:46,839 --> 00:04:50,440 Speaker 1: our daily hormone cycles of stress. There's a lot that 77 00:04:50,480 --> 00:04:54,560 Speaker 1: can influence what's going on down there. And the thing 78 00:04:54,760 --> 00:04:59,560 Speaker 1: is much like machines, because are we not just robots 79 00:04:59,600 --> 00:05:03,000 Speaker 1: with fleshy skin suits. Are we human or are we dancer? 80 00:05:03,200 --> 00:05:08,320 Speaker 1: Oh yeah, machine dancer. But just like those machine dancers, Caroline, 81 00:05:08,800 --> 00:05:14,600 Speaker 1: we need lubrication to keep our parts moving smoothly and pleasurably. 82 00:05:15,080 --> 00:05:20,320 Speaker 1: And that's great reason number one because also, like robot dancers, 83 00:05:20,720 --> 00:05:24,680 Speaker 1: if you don't have enough lubrication, you might injure yourself 84 00:05:24,839 --> 00:05:29,920 Speaker 1: or or get some unpleasant irritation from friction. Yeah. So 85 00:05:30,040 --> 00:05:33,560 Speaker 1: the vagina does self lubricate thanks to those bartholons and 86 00:05:33,640 --> 00:05:37,960 Speaker 1: skeins glands that Kristen mentioned, but not everybody's vagina's self 87 00:05:38,040 --> 00:05:42,040 Speaker 1: lubricate the same amount or consistently or at all. And 88 00:05:42,040 --> 00:05:44,359 Speaker 1: like christ And said, it can vary, and like that 89 00:05:44,400 --> 00:05:47,839 Speaker 1: sex educator Mandalis said, there are so many different factors 90 00:05:47,839 --> 00:05:52,600 Speaker 1: that go into vaginal lubrication, and so we mentioned that. Yeah, okay, 91 00:05:52,600 --> 00:05:55,520 Speaker 1: so the vagina does self lubricate, it can vary, but 92 00:05:55,600 --> 00:05:59,280 Speaker 1: anuses and rectums definitely don't. And like we talked about 93 00:05:59,279 --> 00:06:02,000 Speaker 1: in our anal sex episode last time, the skin around 94 00:06:02,080 --> 00:06:05,359 Speaker 1: the anus is super thin and sensitive, and so whether 95 00:06:05,400 --> 00:06:10,560 Speaker 1: you're experiencing anal sex or vaginal sex, if the tissue tears, 96 00:06:10,600 --> 00:06:13,440 Speaker 1: that can increase your chances of spreading or getting an 97 00:06:13,560 --> 00:06:17,239 Speaker 1: s t I or a bacterial infection. Therefore, lubrication, whether 98 00:06:17,279 --> 00:06:20,960 Speaker 1: it's natural or store bought, is your friend. Yes. And 99 00:06:21,000 --> 00:06:26,120 Speaker 1: it's also your friend because it can make sex, whatever 100 00:06:26,200 --> 00:06:30,560 Speaker 1: kind of sex you might be having, solo, partnered, whatever, 101 00:06:31,360 --> 00:06:34,320 Speaker 1: it can make it feel better. So you have things 102 00:06:34,400 --> 00:06:38,760 Speaker 1: like thicker lubricants that reduce friction, which makes it better 103 00:06:38,800 --> 00:06:43,760 Speaker 1: for things like anal sex because of that tender rectal tissue. 104 00:06:44,400 --> 00:06:48,880 Speaker 1: And then there's this often cited in Indiana University study 105 00:06:48,960 --> 00:06:52,159 Speaker 1: involving more than twenty four hundred women that offered a 106 00:06:52,279 --> 00:06:58,360 Speaker 1: pretty solid case on behalf of lube being used regularly 107 00:06:58,360 --> 00:07:01,200 Speaker 1: in the bedroom. Yeah, and so it is worth noting 108 00:07:01,240 --> 00:07:05,039 Speaker 1: that they focused mostly on penis and vagina sex and masturbation, 109 00:07:05,080 --> 00:07:08,800 Speaker 1: but there was some penis in anas sex. Uh. And 110 00:07:08,800 --> 00:07:11,080 Speaker 1: they found that women who used one of the six 111 00:07:11,160 --> 00:07:16,360 Speaker 1: lubes tested reported much higher rates of sexual satisfaction and pleasure. 112 00:07:16,840 --> 00:07:19,440 Speaker 1: Of course, also, for while we're noting things, we do 113 00:07:19,560 --> 00:07:23,520 Speaker 1: have to note that the lube company Loube maker Pure Romance, 114 00:07:23,920 --> 00:07:27,800 Speaker 1: provided three of the six lubes and in kind support 115 00:07:27,880 --> 00:07:30,800 Speaker 1: for the study. But then again, it is a study 116 00:07:30,800 --> 00:07:34,400 Speaker 1: of twenty four hundred women, and it was so that's 117 00:07:34,440 --> 00:07:37,640 Speaker 1: nothing to sneeze at that a majority reported more pleasurable 118 00:07:37,640 --> 00:07:41,520 Speaker 1: sex thanks to lube. And one thing that I mean, 119 00:07:41,560 --> 00:07:44,960 Speaker 1: I knew that there were all sorts of loops available, 120 00:07:45,720 --> 00:07:49,560 Speaker 1: but I didn't really fully understand that just the depth 121 00:07:49,600 --> 00:07:53,640 Speaker 1: and breadth of the lubricant options that we have literally 122 00:07:53,680 --> 00:07:58,360 Speaker 1: had a fingerchhips because no matter what kind of sex 123 00:07:58,480 --> 00:08:01,200 Speaker 1: you're interested in or mass a bastion, no matter what 124 00:08:01,480 --> 00:08:05,080 Speaker 1: your physical anatomy or level of like personal lubrication, there's 125 00:08:05,160 --> 00:08:09,320 Speaker 1: something for everyone. There are literally hundreds of varieties. You 126 00:08:09,360 --> 00:08:13,160 Speaker 1: can get things like flavored loubes, spermacidal loobs, warming lobes, 127 00:08:13,200 --> 00:08:16,480 Speaker 1: which do you personally freaked me out? Um, and then 128 00:08:16,760 --> 00:08:20,120 Speaker 1: water silicone hybrids, and all of this makes up a 129 00:08:20,160 --> 00:08:26,080 Speaker 1: two hundred nineteen million dollar annual market ASLVE. And now 130 00:08:26,120 --> 00:08:30,440 Speaker 1: I'm just imagining their annual convention. I'm picturing like the 131 00:08:30,440 --> 00:08:36,280 Speaker 1: Wall Street of lube. Bye bye bye bye bye bye. 132 00:08:36,520 --> 00:08:41,040 Speaker 1: Sell Sell don't flip. It's like everyone's feet coming right 133 00:08:41,040 --> 00:08:44,079 Speaker 1: out from under them. That is a danger with silicone 134 00:08:44,080 --> 00:08:47,840 Speaker 1: based loubes. So the three main types of lubes excellent segue. 135 00:08:48,080 --> 00:08:50,280 Speaker 1: The three main types are silicon based, water based, and 136 00:08:50,280 --> 00:08:54,480 Speaker 1: oil based, although oil based is will proceed with caution. 137 00:08:54,520 --> 00:08:57,920 Speaker 1: We'll talk about that one last um. But silicon based 138 00:08:58,000 --> 00:09:02,280 Speaker 1: relatively are the newest loop developments on the market. They 139 00:09:02,360 --> 00:09:05,240 Speaker 1: laugh longer than water based lubes. They're safe to use 140 00:09:05,320 --> 00:09:08,000 Speaker 1: with latex, which is very important for safe sex and 141 00:09:08,080 --> 00:09:12,360 Speaker 1: using condoms. Uh. They're hypoallergenic and do not absorb into 142 00:09:12,400 --> 00:09:16,920 Speaker 1: the skin. But because they don't wash off as well. 143 00:09:17,280 --> 00:09:20,800 Speaker 1: Um A wa, be careful with your sheets in your clothes. 144 00:09:21,520 --> 00:09:24,160 Speaker 1: B don't get any on the floor because you're gonna 145 00:09:24,240 --> 00:09:27,920 Speaker 1: end up really hurting yourself if you slip on it. Uh. 146 00:09:28,080 --> 00:09:30,800 Speaker 1: Clean up is a little harder. You need soap. But 147 00:09:31,000 --> 00:09:34,640 Speaker 1: also the big thing that people point out is that 148 00:09:34,760 --> 00:09:39,680 Speaker 1: silicone based lubes can damage silicone sex toys. So in 149 00:09:39,679 --> 00:09:43,760 Speaker 1: this case, like mixed with like is very bad. It 150 00:09:43,880 --> 00:09:46,920 Speaker 1: degrades your sex toys, which can make them not sanitarian 151 00:09:47,040 --> 00:09:49,559 Speaker 1: safe for use since so if you're using a silicone 152 00:09:49,600 --> 00:09:52,400 Speaker 1: sex story with silicone lube, make sure you're using a 153 00:09:52,480 --> 00:09:55,960 Speaker 1: barrier protection like a condom round it, or just go 154 00:09:56,120 --> 00:09:59,920 Speaker 1: for water based lubes with your sex toys. But definit 155 00:10:00,000 --> 00:10:02,080 Speaker 1: really clean up any that might be on the floor, 156 00:10:02,120 --> 00:10:04,920 Speaker 1: because that's going to be an awkward bruise to explore, 157 00:10:05,040 --> 00:10:09,920 Speaker 1: like a broken arm and what happened there have cut 158 00:10:10,160 --> 00:10:13,920 Speaker 1: slipt on a banana peel. So there's also as you mentioned, 159 00:10:14,200 --> 00:10:17,640 Speaker 1: water based lubricants. These are all purpose. They're safety use 160 00:10:17,679 --> 00:10:22,840 Speaker 1: with latex products, typically non irritating and easy to clean 161 00:10:23,040 --> 00:10:26,440 Speaker 1: up um, but they don't last quite as long because 162 00:10:26,520 --> 00:10:29,240 Speaker 1: of that. They don't have that that silicone thickness, and 163 00:10:29,240 --> 00:10:33,360 Speaker 1: they're made primarily of water go figure um with extra 164 00:10:33,520 --> 00:10:36,920 Speaker 1: ingredients to give a little texture and thickness. And they 165 00:10:37,000 --> 00:10:41,560 Speaker 1: also come in varieties of thicknesses. So they can either 166 00:10:41,640 --> 00:10:45,199 Speaker 1: be liquid so they're thin and clear, or they can 167 00:10:45,240 --> 00:10:49,040 Speaker 1: be more cream like like a thin lotion, which a 168 00:10:49,120 --> 00:10:52,640 Speaker 1: number of sources we read noted that they do tend 169 00:10:52,679 --> 00:10:55,360 Speaker 1: to taste more bitter, and they usually have a little 170 00:10:55,360 --> 00:10:58,320 Speaker 1: bit of silicone added. And then they're also gels that 171 00:10:58,360 --> 00:11:00,720 Speaker 1: are obviously going to be less watery than liquids and 172 00:11:00,800 --> 00:11:04,000 Speaker 1: also last longer, and you can use it in your 173 00:11:04,000 --> 00:11:06,320 Speaker 1: hair if you like. You know, that's really a thing. 174 00:11:07,120 --> 00:11:09,040 Speaker 1: And we so we were looking at a refinery twenty 175 00:11:09,120 --> 00:11:12,959 Speaker 1: nine like slideshow of of lube and there was one 176 00:11:13,000 --> 00:11:16,000 Speaker 1: that they were like, oh, this one also it's it's silicone, 177 00:11:16,320 --> 00:11:18,199 Speaker 1: it's a hybrid. Can also be used in your hair. 178 00:11:18,200 --> 00:11:20,080 Speaker 1: I feel like someone watched There's something about Mary and 179 00:11:20,080 --> 00:11:22,000 Speaker 1: then was like, I've got an idea. I've got a 180 00:11:22,040 --> 00:11:26,000 Speaker 1: more sanitary idea. But here's the thing. When it comes 181 00:11:26,040 --> 00:11:31,640 Speaker 1: to those water based lubricants, um, not only you know, yes, 182 00:11:31,679 --> 00:11:33,600 Speaker 1: they might work well for your hair, but they also 183 00:11:33,679 --> 00:11:36,920 Speaker 1: dry out quickly, and many contain glycerin, which can give 184 00:11:37,000 --> 00:11:40,320 Speaker 1: some people yeast infections. I don't know I needed to 185 00:11:40,360 --> 00:11:42,439 Speaker 1: sing that, but it just we've got because we've got 186 00:11:42,440 --> 00:11:47,480 Speaker 1: a sugarcoat, the full concept. Yeah, and and I said 187 00:11:47,520 --> 00:11:51,800 Speaker 1: sugarcoat because glycerin is a preservative that helps those water 188 00:11:51,840 --> 00:11:54,840 Speaker 1: based lubes maintain moisture. But your body thinks it's a sugar. 189 00:11:54,880 --> 00:11:58,760 Speaker 1: So the theory goes that water based lube is just 190 00:11:59,000 --> 00:12:04,600 Speaker 1: feeding all of your vaginal flora Carolina made a yeast infection. 191 00:12:04,720 --> 00:12:09,760 Speaker 1: Pun Sure, it's like the most stuff Mom never told 192 00:12:09,760 --> 00:12:11,840 Speaker 1: you thing you've ever done. A big day for me. 193 00:12:12,520 --> 00:12:17,640 Speaker 1: But then they're also oil based lubricants, like a vasoline 194 00:12:17,960 --> 00:12:20,480 Speaker 1: or a lotion, and this can be good for solo 195 00:12:20,559 --> 00:12:23,679 Speaker 1: masturbation to avoid chafing or to mix it up. Um. 196 00:12:23,679 --> 00:12:27,120 Speaker 1: And it's also okay to use with polyurething condoms, but 197 00:12:27,559 --> 00:12:30,240 Speaker 1: huge but huge button. I feel like this is pretty 198 00:12:30,240 --> 00:12:35,560 Speaker 1: common knowledge, but it breaks down those latex condoms and 199 00:12:35,800 --> 00:12:39,280 Speaker 1: it can leave a coating on vaginas and rectums that 200 00:12:39,360 --> 00:12:43,000 Speaker 1: can lead to infection. Yeah, So a study and obstetrics 201 00:12:43,040 --> 00:12:47,720 Speaker 1: and gynecology found that women who used vasoline or other 202 00:12:47,760 --> 00:12:51,599 Speaker 1: oils were more likely to have bacterial and yeast infections. 203 00:12:53,000 --> 00:12:55,760 Speaker 1: Of the women who use petroleum jelly as a vaginal 204 00:12:55,880 --> 00:13:01,280 Speaker 1: lubricant reported experiencing bacterial vaginosis compared to women who didn't. 205 00:13:01,640 --> 00:13:06,200 Speaker 1: And the women who used introvaginal oils tested positive for 206 00:13:06,320 --> 00:13:09,200 Speaker 1: candida versus a much smaller percent. It was like eleven 207 00:13:09,320 --> 00:13:12,280 Speaker 1: or eighteen or something much less significant for women who 208 00:13:12,280 --> 00:13:16,240 Speaker 1: were not using oils. And so, what is up with 209 00:13:16,360 --> 00:13:20,720 Speaker 1: that new slash people who are using vasoline's chapstick. It's 210 00:13:20,760 --> 00:13:26,439 Speaker 1: not a moisturizer. Petroleum products suck moisture out, which if 211 00:13:26,480 --> 00:13:33,240 Speaker 1: you apply that to your introvaginal cells or your rectal cells, 212 00:13:33,840 --> 00:13:36,480 Speaker 1: that means that those cells are going to have the 213 00:13:36,520 --> 00:13:38,440 Speaker 1: moisture sucked out of them. They're going to shrivel up 214 00:13:38,480 --> 00:13:40,679 Speaker 1: and and shed, and that is going to leave you 215 00:13:40,840 --> 00:13:44,480 Speaker 1: more open to infection. So, not to scare you, but 216 00:13:44,600 --> 00:13:48,640 Speaker 1: save the vasoline for something else. Not to scare you, 217 00:13:48,679 --> 00:13:51,880 Speaker 1: but you should be scared. But you should not use 218 00:13:51,960 --> 00:13:57,240 Speaker 1: vasoline when it comes to partnered sex masturbations a whole 219 00:13:57,240 --> 00:14:00,199 Speaker 1: other thing. But here's the thing, you're one way way 220 00:14:00,240 --> 00:14:03,280 Speaker 1: back in the day, people were obviously still having sex 221 00:14:03,880 --> 00:14:08,319 Speaker 1: and obviously wanting to experiment with different kinds of lubricants. 222 00:14:08,320 --> 00:14:11,520 Speaker 1: But they had no vasiline. They had no hair gels 223 00:14:11,600 --> 00:14:16,160 Speaker 1: slash lubricant all in one. What did they do in 224 00:14:16,160 --> 00:14:19,080 Speaker 1: a handy pump bottle. Well, they turned to the kitchen. 225 00:14:19,480 --> 00:14:23,920 Speaker 1: And in the kitchen and ancient grease, greasy grease. Get 226 00:14:23,960 --> 00:14:27,480 Speaker 1: it was olive oil. Okay, so olive oil is not 227 00:14:27,600 --> 00:14:30,840 Speaker 1: just for cooking. We also get our first reference to 228 00:14:30,880 --> 00:14:35,120 Speaker 1: the use of olive oil as sexual personal lubricant in 229 00:14:35,440 --> 00:14:40,000 Speaker 1: three fifty BC and handily enough for them, although this 230 00:14:40,080 --> 00:14:43,240 Speaker 1: is not true. Please do not get this impression. Now 231 00:14:43,400 --> 00:14:47,960 Speaker 1: in the year they also thought of it as a contraceptive, 232 00:14:48,480 --> 00:14:51,040 Speaker 1: which is not true. It does not work. Please don't 233 00:14:51,080 --> 00:14:54,080 Speaker 1: do this, Please do not use olive oil as a contraceptive. Also, 234 00:14:54,160 --> 00:14:56,280 Speaker 1: do not use it with condoms. It isn't oil. Yeah, 235 00:14:56,320 --> 00:15:00,120 Speaker 1: Aristotle mentions it in his History of Animals, right ing 236 00:15:00,560 --> 00:15:06,360 Speaker 1: if the pots be smooth, conception is prevented. And next 237 00:15:06,440 --> 00:15:08,560 Speaker 1: we're going to cite a physician that I thought was 238 00:15:08,640 --> 00:15:11,680 Speaker 1: fake at first. Um, and I don't mean to get 239 00:15:11,720 --> 00:15:15,120 Speaker 1: to craft Kristen, but so I was. I was reading 240 00:15:15,160 --> 00:15:19,040 Speaker 1: an article about sort of the history of personal lubricant 241 00:15:19,560 --> 00:15:22,360 Speaker 1: and one name that came up is an ancient Greek 242 00:15:22,400 --> 00:15:26,240 Speaker 1: physician by the name of Sanus. And so I'm reading 243 00:15:26,240 --> 00:15:28,000 Speaker 1: along and I'm like, yes, Souranus. Then I was like, 244 00:15:28,000 --> 00:15:31,160 Speaker 1: wait a second, Well maybe you should spell it for 245 00:15:31,480 --> 00:15:34,880 Speaker 1: listeners to Yeah, okay, well it's spelled s O r 246 00:15:35,560 --> 00:15:39,480 Speaker 1: A n us. Wait what Yeah, that's like a carpenter 247 00:15:39,600 --> 00:15:44,080 Speaker 1: with the last name hammer. That's like a steams for 248 00:15:44,160 --> 00:15:47,720 Speaker 1: this with the last name zipper. Oh, this is zipperent. 249 00:15:47,960 --> 00:15:50,880 Speaker 1: So souranus or if you like to pronounce your planet 250 00:15:51,000 --> 00:15:56,520 Speaker 1: uranus Sonus. Uh thought that olive oil would prevent pregnancy 251 00:15:56,560 --> 00:15:59,800 Speaker 1: by clogging the uterus. So yeah, that's that's gross and 252 00:16:00,000 --> 00:16:03,080 Speaker 1: sounds uncomfortable. Who wants the congested uterus? It it's already 253 00:16:03,120 --> 00:16:05,440 Speaker 1: hysterical and floating around. It doesn't need a cold as well. 254 00:16:06,240 --> 00:16:08,200 Speaker 1: But so there was this idea in ancient Greece that 255 00:16:08,240 --> 00:16:11,280 Speaker 1: not only would you get nice and slippery using olive oil, 256 00:16:11,360 --> 00:16:14,400 Speaker 1: but that it would prevent pregnancy, which I don't know, frankly, 257 00:16:14,680 --> 00:16:16,080 Speaker 1: I bet, I mean, I bet it was great for 258 00:16:16,080 --> 00:16:19,440 Speaker 1: the skin. Yeah, you know, at the very least, I'm 259 00:16:19,480 --> 00:16:22,960 Speaker 1: imagining that women in ancient Greece is had glowing volva's 260 00:16:24,400 --> 00:16:27,160 Speaker 1: very very well taken care of. And then if we 261 00:16:27,200 --> 00:16:30,120 Speaker 1: head over to the East and ancient China, Korea, in Japan, 262 00:16:30,440 --> 00:16:34,760 Speaker 1: people would boil red seaweed to get a sticky liquid 263 00:16:34,800 --> 00:16:37,640 Speaker 1: called karagin in that they would use as an old 264 00:16:37,640 --> 00:16:41,640 Speaker 1: school lube. And we will revisit karagin in later in 265 00:16:41,640 --> 00:16:45,120 Speaker 1: this episode, because those ancient people's using red seaweed were 266 00:16:45,240 --> 00:16:48,600 Speaker 1: onto something. If we stick around in Japan though, from 267 00:16:48,600 --> 00:16:51,040 Speaker 1: the seventeenth to the nineteenth centuries, people were really big 268 00:16:51,080 --> 00:16:54,160 Speaker 1: on using mashed yams, which again is just another thing 269 00:16:54,200 --> 00:16:57,680 Speaker 1: that squeaks me out. They use them to lubricate their 270 00:16:57,720 --> 00:17:02,200 Speaker 1: animal and testine condoms. But fun act nowadays that grated 271 00:17:02,280 --> 00:17:08,359 Speaker 1: yam concoction is actually a popular soup any Japanese listeners, 272 00:17:08,520 --> 00:17:10,640 Speaker 1: who can let us know about this soup. I'm I'm 273 00:17:10,680 --> 00:17:14,160 Speaker 1: curious to know if that's common knowledge that this popular 274 00:17:14,200 --> 00:17:18,040 Speaker 1: soup was once possibly used as a as a lubricant. Yeah, 275 00:17:18,080 --> 00:17:22,080 Speaker 1: somebody phillips in um. But then, of course, speaking of vasoline. 276 00:17:22,640 --> 00:17:26,000 Speaker 1: In the late nineteenth century, we get Brooklyn chemist Robert 277 00:17:26,080 --> 00:17:32,760 Speaker 1: cheesebro who Robert Cheeseburger. Yes, I bet his buddies called 278 00:17:32,840 --> 00:17:35,000 Speaker 1: him that. I bet they didn't, but I will. So 279 00:17:35,080 --> 00:17:39,040 Speaker 1: Bob Cheeseburger Uh ends up tinkering with this gooey wax 280 00:17:39,119 --> 00:17:42,200 Speaker 1: by product from oil rig pumps that he found rig 281 00:17:42,240 --> 00:17:46,920 Speaker 1: workers using to put on burns and cuts as a barrier. Well, 282 00:17:46,960 --> 00:17:50,199 Speaker 1: so he looks at this, uh, this waxy byproduct and 283 00:17:50,520 --> 00:17:54,200 Speaker 1: ends up pulling out all the impurities making it safer 284 00:17:54,280 --> 00:18:01,359 Speaker 1: for human use and creates vasoline. And not too long after, 285 00:18:02,040 --> 00:18:06,919 Speaker 1: in nineteen o four, ky jelly comes along it's introduced 286 00:18:07,119 --> 00:18:10,200 Speaker 1: as a surgical aid. It was the first commercially made 287 00:18:10,359 --> 00:18:14,080 Speaker 1: lubricant f y I and it was made mostly of water, glycerin, 288 00:18:14,480 --> 00:18:19,320 Speaker 1: and cellulose a K A dietary fiber. And the reason 289 00:18:19,560 --> 00:18:24,159 Speaker 1: k y jelly drives up so fast was to lubricate 290 00:18:24,200 --> 00:18:28,440 Speaker 1: incision sites just for cutting. It wasn't meant to obviously 291 00:18:28,480 --> 00:18:31,479 Speaker 1: to like hang out around there, Yeah, hang out and 292 00:18:31,600 --> 00:18:34,040 Speaker 1: stay slippery, because then the surgeon would be like all 293 00:18:34,080 --> 00:18:36,560 Speaker 1: cutting you up all over the place be a disaster. 294 00:18:37,119 --> 00:18:41,680 Speaker 1: But in the sourcersor we read, by nineteen seventeen, KY 295 00:18:41,840 --> 00:18:46,600 Speaker 1: was officially reintroduced as a personal lubricant, which I couldn't 296 00:18:47,160 --> 00:18:50,160 Speaker 1: k Y is very kg with its own personal history. 297 00:18:50,760 --> 00:18:53,800 Speaker 1: Um and so if if that is in fact true, 298 00:18:53,840 --> 00:18:55,800 Speaker 1: I couldn't find another source to back up that one 299 00:18:55,800 --> 00:18:58,440 Speaker 1: source basically, so, and I know that seems like a 300 00:18:58,520 --> 00:19:00,800 Speaker 1: very small detail, but I would be interested to hear 301 00:19:00,800 --> 00:19:04,359 Speaker 1: from listeners anybody who might know if that's officially true 302 00:19:04,400 --> 00:19:07,520 Speaker 1: that in nineteen sev k Y introduced it as a 303 00:19:07,600 --> 00:19:10,920 Speaker 1: personal wink wink wink lubricant. I just blinked at you. 304 00:19:10,960 --> 00:19:13,400 Speaker 1: I didn't wink at you. Well, is that why it 305 00:19:13,480 --> 00:19:16,920 Speaker 1: was unavailable over the counter for so long? It wasn't 306 00:19:16,960 --> 00:19:19,040 Speaker 1: until nineteen eight that you could just walk into your 307 00:19:19,040 --> 00:19:21,480 Speaker 1: local drug store and be like, I'm gonna buy some KY. 308 00:19:21,520 --> 00:19:23,399 Speaker 1: I don't know. Which is so funny because when you 309 00:19:23,440 --> 00:19:26,080 Speaker 1: go into drug stores now you see so many lubes 310 00:19:26,119 --> 00:19:31,240 Speaker 1: on the counter and even personal massagers. Well then in 311 00:19:31,400 --> 00:19:35,240 Speaker 1: nineteen seven, hopping back just a few years after k 312 00:19:35,480 --> 00:19:38,680 Speaker 1: y jelly is introduced, you do have a little product 313 00:19:38,760 --> 00:19:42,920 Speaker 1: called Crisco, which, um this, by the way, this knowledge 314 00:19:42,920 --> 00:19:45,720 Speaker 1: about the history of Crisco as a personal lubricant is 315 00:19:45,920 --> 00:19:51,320 Speaker 1: ruining all of my childhood cookie recipe. Yes, yeah, so 316 00:19:51,680 --> 00:19:55,480 Speaker 1: like k y jelly, Crisco was obviously not first intended 317 00:19:55,560 --> 00:19:59,240 Speaker 1: as a personal sexual lubricant. It was actually developed and 318 00:19:59,320 --> 00:20:03,000 Speaker 1: this ruins my idea of cookie recipes by itself, Like, 319 00:20:03,080 --> 00:20:06,560 Speaker 1: never mind the use as a lube. They actually developed 320 00:20:06,560 --> 00:20:09,320 Speaker 1: it as a replacement for beef tallow and candle making. 321 00:20:10,200 --> 00:20:13,760 Speaker 1: But with the with the widespread use of electric light, 322 00:20:14,400 --> 00:20:17,000 Speaker 1: they were like, well, we've got all of this like 323 00:20:17,359 --> 00:20:20,400 Speaker 1: veggie tallow, what are we supposed to do with it? So, 324 00:20:20,520 --> 00:20:23,679 Speaker 1: through some clever marketing, it was repurposed as a cooking product, 325 00:20:23,800 --> 00:20:28,240 Speaker 1: So how about them cookies. In the nineteen seventies, though, 326 00:20:28,800 --> 00:20:31,920 Speaker 1: it did emerge as a popular lube among gay men, 327 00:20:32,200 --> 00:20:35,119 Speaker 1: and even in nineteen seventy seven The Joy of Gay Sex, 328 00:20:35,200 --> 00:20:39,200 Speaker 1: they wrote vegetable shortening maybe the best lubricants that it's 329 00:20:39,240 --> 00:20:42,240 Speaker 1: not only greasy but also digestible and you can make 330 00:20:42,280 --> 00:20:45,520 Speaker 1: candles out of it, I guess, and cookies. Is there 331 00:20:45,560 --> 00:20:50,240 Speaker 1: anything Criscoe can't do? So clearly there's a rich history 332 00:20:50,320 --> 00:20:55,119 Speaker 1: of personal lubricants. There's so many varieties. But we also 333 00:20:55,240 --> 00:20:58,760 Speaker 1: need to talk a little bit about some health concerns 334 00:20:58,760 --> 00:21:01,280 Speaker 1: which we kind of hinted at so far. Yeah, we've 335 00:21:01,280 --> 00:21:04,720 Speaker 1: talked about how not using lube can cause injury and 336 00:21:04,760 --> 00:21:07,800 Speaker 1: infection because if you are not properly lubricated, that can 337 00:21:07,880 --> 00:21:11,920 Speaker 1: leave you vulnerable to tears, which then leaves you vulnerable 338 00:21:11,960 --> 00:21:14,920 Speaker 1: to infection. And as we mentioned when we discussed the 339 00:21:14,920 --> 00:21:17,680 Speaker 1: whole glycerin thing, there are lubes that do promote yeast 340 00:21:17,720 --> 00:21:21,640 Speaker 1: infections and bacterial vaginosis, although a lot of the studies 341 00:21:21,680 --> 00:21:24,719 Speaker 1: into this are like, oh, we need more research and 342 00:21:24,760 --> 00:21:27,760 Speaker 1: so MAYO clinic O b g I N. Mary Marnarch 343 00:21:28,280 --> 00:21:32,439 Speaker 1: recommends that people use glycerin free options when available, like 344 00:21:32,480 --> 00:21:36,760 Speaker 1: astro glide free or silicon based lubes. And some are 345 00:21:36,840 --> 00:21:42,000 Speaker 1: concerned that lubricants aren't tested well enough because the FDA 346 00:21:42,119 --> 00:21:46,919 Speaker 1: classifies lubricants under medical devices so it doesn't require testing 347 00:21:46,920 --> 00:21:51,840 Speaker 1: and humans just animals. And by the way, reckful use 348 00:21:51,880 --> 00:21:55,480 Speaker 1: of personal lubricants is technically considered off label, so they 349 00:21:55,520 --> 00:21:57,719 Speaker 1: aren't even testing for that at all, which is crazy, 350 00:21:57,760 --> 00:21:59,600 Speaker 1: well know, because they're I mean, they're just they're just 351 00:21:59,680 --> 00:22:03,639 Speaker 1: testing that such a heteronormative testament mice, that's very hetero 352 00:22:03,720 --> 00:22:08,000 Speaker 1: sexist w F D a UM. But according to some experiments, 353 00:22:08,040 --> 00:22:14,160 Speaker 1: some products might actually damage delicate tissue speaking of our rectums, 354 00:22:14,280 --> 00:22:17,680 Speaker 1: or leave you vulnerable to infection, although again cut and 355 00:22:17,760 --> 00:22:20,640 Speaker 1: dried proof is a little hard to come by. Yeah. 356 00:22:20,720 --> 00:22:24,359 Speaker 1: Writing in the journal Chemical and Engineering News, Dr Lauren 357 00:22:24,440 --> 00:22:28,280 Speaker 1: k Will have cited a sexually transmitted diseases study that's 358 00:22:28,280 --> 00:22:31,320 Speaker 1: a journal name, but it's also about STDs that found 359 00:22:31,359 --> 00:22:35,920 Speaker 1: that participants who consistently used personal lubricants for rectal intercourse 360 00:22:36,280 --> 00:22:38,159 Speaker 1: had a higher rate of s t I S like 361 00:22:38,200 --> 00:22:41,960 Speaker 1: chlamydia than people who just used it occasionally. So what's 362 00:22:41,960 --> 00:22:45,320 Speaker 1: going on. The worries about this are based on my 363 00:22:45,560 --> 00:22:49,360 Speaker 1: studies of lubes. Osm Reality, which is my new favorite 364 00:22:49,400 --> 00:22:54,280 Speaker 1: word Christian. Osmolality is the overall concentration of a product's 365 00:22:54,359 --> 00:22:59,240 Speaker 1: molecular ingredients. So in somebody studies, when lady mice were 366 00:22:59,280 --> 00:23:04,200 Speaker 1: exposed to high osmalality lube, they were more susceptible to 367 00:23:04,359 --> 00:23:07,920 Speaker 1: HERPIS infection. So what's going on there? What's happening with 368 00:23:07,960 --> 00:23:13,040 Speaker 1: all that osmolality? These high osmolality products like lubes with 369 00:23:13,320 --> 00:23:18,080 Speaker 1: glycerine and propylene glycol in them, Well, those elements of 370 00:23:18,240 --> 00:23:21,040 Speaker 1: lubes work to keep them slippery and keep them from 371 00:23:21,080 --> 00:23:24,040 Speaker 1: evaporating as fast. But the whole thing is that when 372 00:23:24,080 --> 00:23:27,119 Speaker 1: you've got products with high osmality, it can put your 373 00:23:27,119 --> 00:23:31,320 Speaker 1: whole body chemistry off kilter, and those vaginal rectal cells 374 00:23:31,400 --> 00:23:34,760 Speaker 1: can shrivel up in shed like we talked about with vassaline, 375 00:23:35,280 --> 00:23:38,439 Speaker 1: This can potentially weaken the body's defenses. Not to mention 376 00:23:38,880 --> 00:23:43,520 Speaker 1: that high asthmalality products and spermacidal products can kill off 377 00:23:43,640 --> 00:23:46,240 Speaker 1: some of that happy vaginal flora which can lead to 378 00:23:46,280 --> 00:23:49,879 Speaker 1: bacterial vaginosis. And now I'm just picturing Bob Ross painting 379 00:23:49,960 --> 00:23:53,280 Speaker 1: happy vaginal flora. Well, so what are we to do 380 00:23:53,440 --> 00:23:58,040 Speaker 1: about it? First of all, don't necessarily panic, because, as 381 00:23:58,119 --> 00:24:01,080 Speaker 1: Jim pick At, whose chair of the International Actual Microbicide 382 00:24:01,119 --> 00:24:07,160 Speaker 1: Advocates Group, says, yes, we have some signals that are concerning, 383 00:24:07,960 --> 00:24:11,200 Speaker 1: but quote, just because the lubricant causes cell damage in 384 00:24:11,359 --> 00:24:13,960 Speaker 1: the lab, we don't know whether it has anything to 385 00:24:14,000 --> 00:24:16,840 Speaker 1: do with disease transmission and humans in the real world, 386 00:24:16,880 --> 00:24:19,400 Speaker 1: because again going back to the FDA, because it's classified 387 00:24:19,440 --> 00:24:21,719 Speaker 1: as a medical device, it doesn't have to be tested 388 00:24:21,880 --> 00:24:26,680 Speaker 1: on humans. So there's a study on monkeys which showed 389 00:24:26,800 --> 00:24:31,800 Speaker 1: no signs of cell damage over six months. And using 390 00:24:31,920 --> 00:24:35,000 Speaker 1: lube every once in a while and having one partner 391 00:24:35,080 --> 00:24:38,639 Speaker 1: like one monogamous partner means a lower risk of of 392 00:24:39,040 --> 00:24:42,200 Speaker 1: this bacterial stuff happening. Yeah, it's just the idea of 393 00:24:42,240 --> 00:24:45,840 Speaker 1: protecting yourself and being smart about your sexual encounters. And 394 00:24:45,920 --> 00:24:49,159 Speaker 1: there is good news. We have another recommendation um in 395 00:24:49,480 --> 00:24:53,640 Speaker 1: these studies that Lauren K. Wolf and Jim Pickett we're 396 00:24:53,680 --> 00:24:58,360 Speaker 1: talking about the product Good Clean Love did not damage 397 00:24:58,359 --> 00:25:02,680 Speaker 1: tissues or increase a HIV risk in a study. So, 398 00:25:02,840 --> 00:25:05,280 Speaker 1: in addition to all this stuff, the big in real 399 00:25:05,359 --> 00:25:07,760 Speaker 1: life worry, the I r L worry for the past 400 00:25:07,840 --> 00:25:11,480 Speaker 1: fifteen years, has been over the surfactant, in other words, 401 00:25:11,560 --> 00:25:15,320 Speaker 1: a detergent and wedding agent, non oxin A nine. It 402 00:25:15,400 --> 00:25:19,639 Speaker 1: sounds very space age and scientific, but this product non 403 00:25:19,720 --> 00:25:22,639 Speaker 1: oxidal nine, had been used in spermocidal loobs for a 404 00:25:22,880 --> 00:25:27,359 Speaker 1: long time because it destroys sperm membranes, and so researchers 405 00:25:27,400 --> 00:25:31,040 Speaker 1: were testing whether it could block HIV transmission noble cause. 406 00:25:31,800 --> 00:25:35,080 Speaker 1: But not only can it not, but it actually increases 407 00:25:35,160 --> 00:25:38,600 Speaker 1: the risk of contracting HIV. And they found this out 408 00:25:38,880 --> 00:25:43,159 Speaker 1: by following a population of at risk sex workers in Asia. 409 00:25:43,920 --> 00:25:46,560 Speaker 1: And the reason why that risk went up was because 410 00:25:46,880 --> 00:25:52,080 Speaker 1: those spermocidal properties are also bad news for cells lying 411 00:25:52,160 --> 00:25:55,760 Speaker 1: the vagina and the rectum, because the vaginal wall is 412 00:25:55,760 --> 00:25:58,639 Speaker 1: pretty great at fighting infection on its own and doesn't 413 00:25:58,680 --> 00:26:01,520 Speaker 1: really need so much helps. So is this a signal 414 00:26:01,680 --> 00:26:05,760 Speaker 1: to think twice about using spermacidal lubricants? I think so. 415 00:26:06,000 --> 00:26:07,399 Speaker 1: I think it's also a good sign to talk to 416 00:26:07,440 --> 00:26:10,760 Speaker 1: your doctor. Yeah, talk to your doctor. You know, don't 417 00:26:10,920 --> 00:26:14,199 Speaker 1: perhaps have multiple sexual partners at the same time if 418 00:26:14,200 --> 00:26:17,080 Speaker 1: you're not using proper protection. All of those basic things. 419 00:26:17,840 --> 00:26:21,919 Speaker 1: And so obviously it's important to protect yourself and be smart. 420 00:26:22,320 --> 00:26:24,560 Speaker 1: Because there is a bonus. We talked about how we 421 00:26:24,600 --> 00:26:29,520 Speaker 1: would return to seaweed cry seaweed bonus, seaweed based lube bonus, 422 00:26:30,400 --> 00:26:35,840 Speaker 1: a celiberty bonus. Uh So that seaweed byproduct karagin in 423 00:26:35,960 --> 00:26:39,840 Speaker 1: that happens when you boil red seaweed turns out it 424 00:26:40,040 --> 00:26:43,600 Speaker 1: might be useful as an inexpensive topical protection against the 425 00:26:43,680 --> 00:26:48,280 Speaker 1: sexual transmission of HPV Come again, Yeah what? In a 426 00:26:48,400 --> 00:26:51,720 Speaker 1: two thousand six study in the Journal Plus Pathogens, they 427 00:26:51,880 --> 00:26:57,400 Speaker 1: found that HPV virus particles were unable to bind two 428 00:26:57,520 --> 00:27:02,720 Speaker 1: cells when karaginen was present, and that includes sperm. Studies 429 00:27:02,720 --> 00:27:05,399 Speaker 1: have shown that HPV combine to sperm cells and go 430 00:27:05,560 --> 00:27:08,840 Speaker 1: farther into the female genital tract, and so carrageen and 431 00:27:08,880 --> 00:27:12,159 Speaker 1: appears to prevent that too. And since it's already in 432 00:27:12,560 --> 00:27:15,600 Speaker 1: a widespread commercial use as a thickening agent for a 433 00:27:15,680 --> 00:27:18,600 Speaker 1: lot of food and cosmetic products, we know that it's 434 00:27:18,920 --> 00:27:22,240 Speaker 1: pretty safe, so it could have a good safety profile 435 00:27:22,400 --> 00:27:25,080 Speaker 1: for long term vaginal use. Are you telling me, Caroline 436 00:27:25,240 --> 00:27:27,200 Speaker 1: that we should all just like get real d I 437 00:27:27,400 --> 00:27:29,800 Speaker 1: Y about this run out by some red seaweed and 438 00:27:29,880 --> 00:27:33,960 Speaker 1: boil it and just use whatever is left in the pot. 439 00:27:34,200 --> 00:27:36,960 Speaker 1: I would tell you to go to your gynecologist and 440 00:27:37,000 --> 00:27:39,600 Speaker 1: asked me about carragin and yeah, I ask your doctor 441 00:27:39,640 --> 00:27:42,440 Speaker 1: about where these studies have gone. Yeah, I mean, I'm 442 00:27:42,480 --> 00:27:46,240 Speaker 1: just wondering, like what the practical application of the carragin 443 00:27:46,320 --> 00:27:48,240 Speaker 1: in would be like, are there it would be a gel. 444 00:27:48,600 --> 00:27:51,320 Speaker 1: There's been a lot there's been a lot of conversation 445 00:27:51,400 --> 00:27:57,320 Speaker 1: out there in terms of carrageen in infused lubricants UM 446 00:27:57,760 --> 00:28:02,879 Speaker 1: and carrageen in product for this very purpose. UM. But 447 00:28:03,000 --> 00:28:06,240 Speaker 1: I would also encourage people to not throw out their 448 00:28:06,440 --> 00:28:11,320 Speaker 1: condoms just because. Yeah, so just because just I mean, 449 00:28:11,359 --> 00:28:13,880 Speaker 1: you should just have them anyway, you know, in case 450 00:28:13,960 --> 00:28:15,440 Speaker 1: you want to make a balloon animal, if you want 451 00:28:15,440 --> 00:28:19,960 Speaker 1: to make a centerpiece or something. But here's the thing. 452 00:28:21,359 --> 00:28:24,360 Speaker 1: Using lube does not mean you're a failure or you're 453 00:28:24,359 --> 00:28:26,920 Speaker 1: bad at sex, or you're inadequate or unnatural. As we 454 00:28:27,040 --> 00:28:29,439 Speaker 1: have emphasized over and over again, it tends to make 455 00:28:29,480 --> 00:28:33,040 Speaker 1: things more pleasurable. And lube also, it is worth mentioning, 456 00:28:33,560 --> 00:28:39,640 Speaker 1: is a very important resource for people who have wolvedenia 457 00:28:39,840 --> 00:28:45,040 Speaker 1: and vaginiceness and other conditions that make sex painful. And 458 00:28:45,160 --> 00:28:48,360 Speaker 1: so there's even something, um, a stuff I've never told 459 00:28:48,360 --> 00:28:52,120 Speaker 1: you listener messages about a while back. UM is something 460 00:28:52,600 --> 00:28:58,400 Speaker 1: called scream cream, which is a combination prescription lubricant with 461 00:28:58,760 --> 00:29:01,360 Speaker 1: a little bit of a numbering agent and as well, 462 00:29:01,440 --> 00:29:03,560 Speaker 1: I don't know if it's light cane or what, um, 463 00:29:03,920 --> 00:29:06,840 Speaker 1: but this listener wrote us and said that it completely 464 00:29:07,560 --> 00:29:14,640 Speaker 1: revolutionized her sexual experiences because it made sex even possible. Yes, However, 465 00:29:15,200 --> 00:29:19,200 Speaker 1: for the general population, be very, very careful if you're 466 00:29:19,280 --> 00:29:22,640 Speaker 1: using any type of numbing agent for any type of sex, 467 00:29:22,800 --> 00:29:27,360 Speaker 1: because pain in in a normal individual who does not 468 00:29:27,800 --> 00:29:33,080 Speaker 1: have volvedenia or or related UH conditions, Pain is your 469 00:29:33,120 --> 00:29:36,479 Speaker 1: body signal that something is wrong, and so if you are, 470 00:29:36,560 --> 00:29:40,800 Speaker 1: for instance, having anal sex with lubricant that includes a 471 00:29:40,920 --> 00:29:45,760 Speaker 1: numbing agent, um something something not great could happen. You 472 00:29:45,840 --> 00:29:50,480 Speaker 1: could experience that tissue tearing or or worse. So just 473 00:29:50,560 --> 00:29:53,880 Speaker 1: please be careful if you're using lubricants with numbing agents. Well, 474 00:29:53,960 --> 00:29:57,760 Speaker 1: and we've been talking a lot about spermicidal lubricants, but 475 00:29:58,120 --> 00:30:03,640 Speaker 1: what about using lubricants while pregnant, Because a lot of 476 00:30:03,720 --> 00:30:06,000 Speaker 1: sources will say, well, you might not even need to 477 00:30:06,120 --> 00:30:09,720 Speaker 1: use any lubricant because for many pregnant women not all 478 00:30:10,200 --> 00:30:15,200 Speaker 1: um vaginal lubrication actually increases during that time. But is 479 00:30:15,240 --> 00:30:19,400 Speaker 1: it still safe to use lub while you're pregnant. Yeah, 480 00:30:19,520 --> 00:30:22,840 Speaker 1: it's totally safe, but there are some things to keep 481 00:30:22,880 --> 00:30:26,480 Speaker 1: in mind. This was coming from a Parents magazine article 482 00:30:26,520 --> 00:30:30,720 Speaker 1: that we found UH. An assistant professor of Obstetrics and 483 00:30:30,760 --> 00:30:36,760 Speaker 1: Gynecology at the University of Rochester Medical Center told pregnant 484 00:30:36,800 --> 00:30:40,440 Speaker 1: moms that their best bet is a water based product, 485 00:30:40,480 --> 00:30:45,240 Speaker 1: and she recommends products like Astroglide UH, Sliquid Naturals H 486 00:30:45,400 --> 00:30:49,720 Speaker 1: two O yes, water based organic lubricant, and something called 487 00:30:49,720 --> 00:30:52,560 Speaker 1: slippery stuff, which I just like to imagine that that's 488 00:30:52,600 --> 00:30:56,000 Speaker 1: the lower case that it's just slippery. Just try slippery stuff. 489 00:30:56,000 --> 00:30:59,719 Speaker 1: I don't know, it just sounds like ghack from Way 490 00:30:59,760 --> 00:31:03,600 Speaker 1: Black one. So steer clear maybe then of the silicon 491 00:31:03,720 --> 00:31:07,360 Speaker 1: based lubricants and stick more with the water based lubricants 492 00:31:07,360 --> 00:31:10,880 Speaker 1: if you're pregnant, because to emphasize again, while for many 493 00:31:10,960 --> 00:31:15,120 Speaker 1: pregnant women, pregnancy comes along with increased fasial lubrication, but 494 00:31:15,640 --> 00:31:17,959 Speaker 1: the opposite can also happen. I mean that's the thing 495 00:31:18,240 --> 00:31:21,080 Speaker 1: with this whole lubrication issue. It's like it could be 496 00:31:21,240 --> 00:31:23,840 Speaker 1: one way, or it could be totally the other. And 497 00:31:23,920 --> 00:31:25,600 Speaker 1: that might be for different bodies, or it could just 498 00:31:25,680 --> 00:31:29,080 Speaker 1: be at different times in your life. Yeah, and and 499 00:31:29,360 --> 00:31:31,960 Speaker 1: and if there is a pride issue or a shame 500 00:31:32,120 --> 00:31:35,040 Speaker 1: issue for you or your partner or your friends, even 501 00:31:35,160 --> 00:31:38,720 Speaker 1: around lube, I mean, I think it's safe to say 502 00:31:38,840 --> 00:31:41,640 Speaker 1: that lube can be used by anyone at any time 503 00:31:41,720 --> 00:31:44,640 Speaker 1: for any type of sexual activity to make it better. 504 00:31:44,800 --> 00:31:48,840 Speaker 1: Whatever better means, if it just feels better, if it's safer, Um, 505 00:31:48,960 --> 00:31:51,280 Speaker 1: I think it's okay to use. There were plenty of 506 00:31:51,360 --> 00:31:53,680 Speaker 1: people quoted in these articles that we read who were 507 00:31:53,760 --> 00:31:56,720 Speaker 1: just saying, like, I don't have problems with personal my 508 00:31:56,840 --> 00:32:00,400 Speaker 1: own personal lubrication, but my partner and I just love 509 00:32:00,560 --> 00:32:03,320 Speaker 1: to use lube that we buy at the store to 510 00:32:03,440 --> 00:32:06,720 Speaker 1: improve our sexual experience. It means we can potentially go 511 00:32:06,960 --> 00:32:09,640 Speaker 1: longer or have a more intimate experience. And you can 512 00:32:09,680 --> 00:32:13,040 Speaker 1: also try it out so low before you bring another 513 00:32:13,120 --> 00:32:15,000 Speaker 1: person into the mix if you want to, just to 514 00:32:15,040 --> 00:32:18,160 Speaker 1: see how you like it, take it for a test drive. Right, So, 515 00:32:19,280 --> 00:32:22,720 Speaker 1: listeners curious to hear your lubricant thoughts and if you 516 00:32:22,840 --> 00:32:28,280 Speaker 1: have any recommendations. You all always have such fantastic recommendations 517 00:32:28,360 --> 00:32:30,080 Speaker 1: for so many things, so we'd be curious to know 518 00:32:30,440 --> 00:32:33,440 Speaker 1: what kind of lubricants you really prefer or some that 519 00:32:34,040 --> 00:32:36,680 Speaker 1: have not worked very well for you. Mom step at 520 00:32:36,680 --> 00:32:38,840 Speaker 1: House Stepwork dot Com is our email address. You can 521 00:32:38,840 --> 00:32:42,080 Speaker 1: also tweet us at mom Stuff podcast or messages on Facebook, 522 00:32:42,400 --> 00:32:44,280 Speaker 1: and we've got a couple of messages to share with 523 00:32:44,400 --> 00:32:52,120 Speaker 1: you right now. Well, I have a letter here from 524 00:32:52,240 --> 00:32:56,560 Speaker 1: Hillary in response to our little mis perfect episode on perfectionism. 525 00:32:57,000 --> 00:33:00,240 Speaker 1: So she starts out with a list illustrating some of 526 00:33:00,320 --> 00:33:05,560 Speaker 1: her perfectionist like self improvement tendencies. Uh, she says, I 527 00:33:05,640 --> 00:33:08,240 Speaker 1: listened to while going for a sixteen mile run because 528 00:33:08,400 --> 00:33:10,120 Speaker 1: I like to be able to run a marathon with 529 00:33:10,200 --> 00:33:12,880 Speaker 1: only five to six weeks notice. On a Saturday morning, 530 00:33:13,440 --> 00:33:15,480 Speaker 1: before I had leased up my shoes, I'd read a 531 00:33:15,560 --> 00:33:18,800 Speaker 1: few chapters of Africa Betrayed because I wish I had 532 00:33:18,840 --> 00:33:21,760 Speaker 1: more exposure to African theorist in school in this particular text, 533 00:33:21,800 --> 00:33:23,640 Speaker 1: with my book in my Field but unrelated to work 534 00:33:23,680 --> 00:33:27,360 Speaker 1: book of the Week, and reviewed my French vocabulary, a 535 00:33:27,440 --> 00:33:29,120 Speaker 1: language that I'm taking so that I will be more 536 00:33:29,200 --> 00:33:32,720 Speaker 1: competitive as an applicant to work in Francophone Africa. With 537 00:33:32,840 --> 00:33:37,040 Speaker 1: the exception of the issue with procrastination, the prototypical perfectionist 538 00:33:37,120 --> 00:33:40,320 Speaker 1: description fit me to a t. The fear of failure, 539 00:33:40,440 --> 00:33:43,920 Speaker 1: the consistently high expectations for yourself and others. These are 540 00:33:44,000 --> 00:33:47,560 Speaker 1: some of my most defining characteristics. I think my particular 541 00:33:47,640 --> 00:33:50,320 Speaker 1: brand of perfectionism as the result of three things. A 542 00:33:50,400 --> 00:33:54,479 Speaker 1: born tendency toward perfectionism, the uncertainty of what having lupus 543 00:33:54,640 --> 00:33:57,760 Speaker 1: entails from my future, and knowing that scholastic achievement was 544 00:33:57,800 --> 00:33:59,400 Speaker 1: a way to get out of a town where I 545 00:33:59,520 --> 00:34:02,520 Speaker 1: felt a welcome and happy. I remember one day I 546 00:34:02,600 --> 00:34:04,640 Speaker 1: came home from school and sat down to do my homework. 547 00:34:04,680 --> 00:34:07,160 Speaker 1: Immediately after I stepped through the door, when my mom 548 00:34:07,280 --> 00:34:09,120 Speaker 1: told me I could go play before the sunset and 549 00:34:09,200 --> 00:34:12,160 Speaker 1: do my homework later, I responded, Nah, I'll feel better 550 00:34:12,200 --> 00:34:14,080 Speaker 1: if I just get it done now. I was in 551 00:34:14,200 --> 00:34:17,640 Speaker 1: the third grade, and Hillary that paragraph really jumped out 552 00:34:17,680 --> 00:34:21,520 Speaker 1: to me because I remember doing the same thing. Um. 553 00:34:22,480 --> 00:34:24,239 Speaker 1: She goes on to say, when I began showing signs 554 00:34:24,280 --> 00:34:27,040 Speaker 1: of lupus, I was only thirteen. Others in my family 555 00:34:27,120 --> 00:34:29,719 Speaker 1: with the disease, especially my mom, had only begun having 556 00:34:29,800 --> 00:34:32,360 Speaker 1: problems in their thirties. While I've been lucky that my 557 00:34:32,440 --> 00:34:34,560 Speaker 1: presentation is mild and that I can still live an 558 00:34:34,560 --> 00:34:37,000 Speaker 1: active life, in the back of my mind, I always 559 00:34:37,000 --> 00:34:39,080 Speaker 1: wonder if I'll be able to replicate what I've done 560 00:34:39,120 --> 00:34:41,920 Speaker 1: today and yesterday by tomorrow. Part of the reason that 561 00:34:41,960 --> 00:34:44,399 Speaker 1: I'm a vegetarian and an athlete is that doctors told 562 00:34:44,440 --> 00:34:46,040 Speaker 1: me that the best thing I could do for myself 563 00:34:46,120 --> 00:34:48,359 Speaker 1: and managing the disease was to treat my body well. 564 00:34:49,040 --> 00:34:51,360 Speaker 1: As silly as it is, I feel a weird vindication 565 00:34:51,480 --> 00:34:54,080 Speaker 1: and pushing my body physically. At least then I get 566 00:34:54,160 --> 00:34:56,160 Speaker 1: to control the hurt and say that I'm merely trying 567 00:34:56,200 --> 00:34:59,080 Speaker 1: to stay active and manage my disease and stress through exercise. 568 00:34:59,600 --> 00:35:02,760 Speaker 1: Hillary goes on to describe how hard she worked in school, 569 00:35:02,840 --> 00:35:04,840 Speaker 1: pushing herself to get a high g p A to 570 00:35:04,880 --> 00:35:09,080 Speaker 1: get out of Augusta, Georgia. She says her fears were revived, however, 571 00:35:09,160 --> 00:35:12,360 Speaker 1: when I arrived on campus at college. In order to 572 00:35:12,440 --> 00:35:14,400 Speaker 1: keep my scholarship, I had to maintain a certain g 573 00:35:14,560 --> 00:35:16,799 Speaker 1: p A. In the first weeks on campus, I learned 574 00:35:16,800 --> 00:35:20,360 Speaker 1: about an accelerated five year bachelor's master's program in international 575 00:35:20,440 --> 00:35:23,200 Speaker 1: studies that admitted only eight students a year, and I 576 00:35:23,280 --> 00:35:26,400 Speaker 1: set my heart on being accepted. As a product of 577 00:35:26,440 --> 00:35:28,919 Speaker 1: a Georgia public school system surrounded by thousands of prep 578 00:35:28,960 --> 00:35:31,640 Speaker 1: school geniuses, I was terrified that I wouldn't be able 579 00:35:31,640 --> 00:35:34,840 Speaker 1: to keep up intellectually. I practically lived in the library 580 00:35:35,200 --> 00:35:37,160 Speaker 1: date nights with my then boyfriend were spent in the 581 00:35:37,200 --> 00:35:40,560 Speaker 1: adream of of our favorite study hall, splitting desserts that 582 00:35:40,600 --> 00:35:42,839 Speaker 1: we've taken out, and over stuff take out containers from 583 00:35:42,840 --> 00:35:46,160 Speaker 1: the cafeteria. I was accepted into the five year program, 584 00:35:46,200 --> 00:35:48,120 Speaker 1: and I finished my time at Johns Hopkins with a 585 00:35:48,200 --> 00:35:50,600 Speaker 1: three point nine for g p A and was inducted 586 00:35:50,600 --> 00:35:53,760 Speaker 1: into five Beta Kappa. I'm now working a wonderful research 587 00:35:53,840 --> 00:35:56,279 Speaker 1: job in my field in Washington, d C. A city 588 00:35:56,320 --> 00:35:58,200 Speaker 1: I had wanted to move to since I was twelve, 589 00:35:58,920 --> 00:36:01,840 Speaker 1: and yet the tendencies towards a fear of failure and 590 00:36:01,880 --> 00:36:04,919 Speaker 1: an almost manic workpace have only accelerated as I've gotten 591 00:36:05,000 --> 00:36:07,879 Speaker 1: older and left academia. I dread the thought of missing 592 00:36:07,920 --> 00:36:10,440 Speaker 1: a deadline. I live and die by my Google calendar, 593 00:36:10,680 --> 00:36:12,920 Speaker 1: and I pride myself on having five irons in the 594 00:36:13,000 --> 00:36:16,520 Speaker 1: fire at any given time. Life as a perfectionist feels 595 00:36:16,560 --> 00:36:19,000 Speaker 1: like being constantly caught in the churning of the ocean. 596 00:36:19,480 --> 00:36:21,520 Speaker 1: If you've ever been in a particularly strong current, you 597 00:36:21,600 --> 00:36:23,800 Speaker 1: know the feeling of being pulled down and under is 598 00:36:23,840 --> 00:36:26,800 Speaker 1: the way of gains potential and momentum. You're pushed forward 599 00:36:26,800 --> 00:36:29,160 Speaker 1: by a force you can't entirely explain or since the 600 00:36:29,239 --> 00:36:32,120 Speaker 1: source of it's exhilarating and a little scary, at least 601 00:36:32,160 --> 00:36:34,360 Speaker 1: the first time, before you know what to expect. The 602 00:36:34,480 --> 00:36:36,560 Speaker 1: second that you set an objective or achieve a goal 603 00:36:36,640 --> 00:36:38,680 Speaker 1: is like reaching the crest of the wave. It's a 604 00:36:38,760 --> 00:36:41,320 Speaker 1: half second period of stillness before the force, the momentum, 605 00:36:41,360 --> 00:36:44,879 Speaker 1: the potential pushes you forward and under again. I'm still 606 00:36:44,920 --> 00:36:47,680 Speaker 1: struggling to maintain the aspects of my perfectionism that I 607 00:36:47,840 --> 00:36:51,520 Speaker 1: like while lowering my expectations of others. Not my monkey, 608 00:36:51,680 --> 00:36:54,480 Speaker 1: not my circus. And your podcast was a great help 609 00:36:54,520 --> 00:36:57,440 Speaker 1: to me and identifying some potentially unhealthy habits I have. 610 00:36:58,520 --> 00:37:01,719 Speaker 1: So thanks Hillary and good love with your perfectionism. And 611 00:37:01,840 --> 00:37:04,560 Speaker 1: I've got a letter here from Sarah about our anxiety 612 00:37:04,719 --> 00:37:08,320 Speaker 1: podcasts as well, and she writes, I struggled with depression 613 00:37:08,320 --> 00:37:11,640 Speaker 1: and anxiety my whole life. I suffer from recently diagnosed 614 00:37:11,800 --> 00:37:16,000 Speaker 1: generalized anxiety disorder. What up I can relate. So she 615 00:37:16,080 --> 00:37:18,040 Speaker 1: goes on to say one of the new fads I've 616 00:37:18,080 --> 00:37:22,640 Speaker 1: found that helps me is coloring. I discovered its therapeutic 617 00:37:22,719 --> 00:37:27,000 Speaker 1: benefits from an article about meditation replacements. My therapist agreed 618 00:37:27,040 --> 00:37:29,600 Speaker 1: and told me that it helps with mindfulness focusing on 619 00:37:29,680 --> 00:37:32,200 Speaker 1: the here and now versus worrying about the past or future. 620 00:37:32,719 --> 00:37:35,760 Speaker 1: There are hundreds of pre coloring pages out there, especially 621 00:37:35,800 --> 00:37:39,720 Speaker 1: on Pinterest, and it's worked wonderfully for me. To anyone 622 00:37:39,760 --> 00:37:42,680 Speaker 1: who suffers from anxiety, either diagnosed or undiagnosed, I think 623 00:37:42,719 --> 00:37:44,480 Speaker 1: the best advice I can offer is to find a 624 00:37:44,560 --> 00:37:47,759 Speaker 1: coping mechanism that works best for you and utilize it. 625 00:37:48,280 --> 00:37:51,280 Speaker 1: The social stigma behind mental health issues is more damaging 626 00:37:51,360 --> 00:37:54,000 Speaker 1: than the issues themselves, so always find the people in 627 00:37:54,080 --> 00:37:56,880 Speaker 1: your life who will support you. That's by far the 628 00:37:56,960 --> 00:37:59,680 Speaker 1: best way to fight the disease. Thank you for your 629 00:37:59,719 --> 00:38:02,560 Speaker 1: time and for the excellent podcast. I'm a relatively new 630 00:38:02,640 --> 00:38:07,240 Speaker 1: listener and enjoy it immensely well. We enjoy immensely hearing 631 00:38:07,280 --> 00:38:09,600 Speaker 1: from all of you. Mom Stuff at how stuff works 632 00:38:09,640 --> 00:38:12,160 Speaker 1: dot com is our email address and for links all 633 00:38:12,160 --> 00:38:14,760 Speaker 1: of our social media as well as all of our blogs, videos, 634 00:38:14,800 --> 00:38:17,400 Speaker 1: and podcasts, including this one with our sources. So you 635 00:38:17,560 --> 00:38:22,160 Speaker 1: can learn more about personal lubricants, head on over to 636 00:38:22,280 --> 00:38:29,000 Speaker 1: stuff Mom Never Told You dot com for more on 637 00:38:29,080 --> 00:38:31,560 Speaker 1: this and thousands of other topics. Is a house. Stuff 638 00:38:31,600 --> 00:38:32,239 Speaker 1: works dot com