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Speaker 1: Hey, this is Zam. This is John, your og Okay

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Speaker 1: Storytime podcast hosts, and we got some delicious, juicy stories

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Speaker 1: coming up. But if you want to hear that deliciousness,

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Speaker 1: you know, just stick around for a two minute break

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Speaker 1: with a word from our sponsors. My boyfriend cheated on

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Speaker 1: me with eight different girls. I want to walk away.

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Speaker 2: You gotta play the field sometimes.

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Speaker 1: Oh my goodness. I've been with s let's call him

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Speaker 1: for a total of ten months. The first month or

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Speaker 1: so was your typical butterfly in the stomach production. By

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Speaker 1: the end of the first month, we were official, and

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Speaker 1: we're seeing each other three to four times a week.

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Speaker 1: Dang a month being official. I would never do that.

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Speaker 1: Around the second month, that's so slow. By the end

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Speaker 1: of the second month, he reactivated several of his old

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Speaker 1: dating profiles on different websites, unbeknownst to me at the time.

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Speaker 1: By the way, this comes from confused with Teeter and

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Speaker 1: if you want to submit your own stories, go to

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Speaker 1: the r slash Okay Storytime. So I write it. So

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Speaker 1: for the next six months, I was busy fallen in love,

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Speaker 1: and he was busy dating girls behind my back.

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Speaker 2: Yikes.

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Speaker 1: He spoke with countless other people via the internet, took

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Speaker 1: eight girls out for drinks and slept with three of them.

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Speaker 2: Yikes.

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Speaker 1: All the while he was doing all the typical couple

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Speaker 1: stuff with me, breakfast with his grandma, hotel stays in

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Speaker 1: the city, swimming with his family, wine tasting with his friends,

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Speaker 1: helping me move apartments, on and on. So it sounds

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Speaker 1: like he was the perfect boyfriend and perfect date.

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Speaker 2: Yes, he's doing a great job, except at the commitment part.

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Speaker 1: All this time got the time management does see. We

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Speaker 1: talked about how much we were into each other, told

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Speaker 1: each other we loved one another, joked about how cute

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Speaker 1: our kids would be.

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Speaker 2: Yes, he's gonna have a lot of kids, have a

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Speaker 2: lot of kids.

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Speaker 1: Around the eight month mark, I started feeling extraordinarily weird

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Speaker 1: about something, and I couldn't quite put my finger on it.

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Speaker 1: I'd had this nagging feeling from the start, but I

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Speaker 1: thought it was just my own insecurities, and I did

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Speaker 1: my mess to swallow them down and carry on. However,

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Speaker 1: I had slowly started feeling like a burden and as

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Speaker 1: if he didn't even like me, let alone love me.

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Speaker 2: Ouch.

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Speaker 1: It was such a slow process that I never knew

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Speaker 1: it even had happened until there. I was one day

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Speaker 1: suddenly accusing him of cheating on me with his best girlfriend.

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Speaker 1: I felt like absolute crap, but I had to figure

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Speaker 1: out what was going on or if I was just

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Speaker 1: slowly going insane. He denied it, and I found it

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Speaker 1: difficult to believe him, even though I had zero proof

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Speaker 1: of anything. A couple of weeks after that argument, I

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Speaker 1: looked at his phone.

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Speaker 3: Wrong.

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Speaker 1: I know it's true, it's true. It's wrong. It's wrong.

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Speaker 1: I shouldn't do that. What's our rules? If you? I?

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Speaker 2: Well, the rule is if you're if you're gotta look

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Speaker 2: at the phone, the relationship's already over.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, And if you can look at the phone if

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Speaker 1: there's probable cause. But that sounds like there wasn't probable cause.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, except but I mean, the relationship is already over.

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Speaker 1: Yeah. Well, I saw that he was talking to another girl,

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Speaker 1: and I confronted him about it. He told me that

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Speaker 1: he wasn't cheating, but if things were going badly with us,

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Speaker 1: he would WHOA. Well, that made absolutely no sense, So

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Speaker 1: I broke up with him. No, what we like make sense?

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Speaker 1: That doesn't make sense. Boom dropped. During our breakup talk,

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Speaker 1: he admitted to sleeping with someone else.

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Speaker 2: Yikes.

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Speaker 1: We didn't speak again until after about six weeks. I'd

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Speaker 1: been on a Netflix binge and mistakenly watched a movie

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Speaker 1: where this guy cheats on his girlfriend. They break up

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Speaker 1: and then they have a heart to heart, but why

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Speaker 1: it happened, and by the end of the movie they

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Speaker 1: are back together.

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Speaker 2: I hate those movies.

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Speaker 1: I totally lost it at that point. I'd been having

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Speaker 1: such a hard time with no contact, wasn't eating exact that.

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Speaker 1: I was more or less out of my rational mind

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Speaker 1: and went as far as looking up his number, girl

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Speaker 1: on an old phone bill Online.

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Speaker 2: Girl Girl, old phone bill.

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Speaker 1: No, stay off the phone bill. We ended up meeting

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Speaker 1: at a restaurant near my place and spent six hours

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Speaker 1: discussing what happened and why she's living.

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Speaker 2: Out her own literally doing the movie blog.

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Speaker 1: But it was so romantic in the movie, He's Changed.

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Speaker 1: I was trickle truthed about the entire cheating thing for

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Speaker 1: about two weeks after that, and then the number grew

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Speaker 1: steadily from one to two, to three, to four, to five,

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Speaker 1: to six, to seven to eight.

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Speaker 2: Girls fool me once, shame on you for me eight times,

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Speaker 2: jame on me.

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Speaker 1: On me seven other of those times. By the time

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Speaker 1: I had what I believe now to be the full

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Speaker 1: scope of his cheating, I was already emotionally invested again.

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Speaker 1: She's back in, she was.

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Speaker 2: Well, now that I know he's cheated on me with

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Speaker 2: eight girls.

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Speaker 1: Now we can move on and he's got it out

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Speaker 1: of his system. Yeah, you can commit to me. He

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Speaker 1: just needed he needed to, like, you know, zoom out

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Speaker 1: so you can zoom back in macro to micro. It's

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Speaker 1: the tale is old inside. As of today, it's been

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Speaker 1: a little over a months in meeting up with him

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Speaker 1: again at the restaurant. We see each other three to

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Speaker 1: four times per week. Well, we sleep together. I don't

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Speaker 1: like you, and have been continuing the original conversation about

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Speaker 1: the cheating and why he did it. I'm convinced it

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Speaker 1: wasn't an issue of temptation more than he was actively

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Speaker 1: seeking an escape from a life he was unhappy in

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Speaker 1: and in his words, I was a casualty. Now I'm

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Speaker 1: watching him take a more direct approach to his problems.

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Speaker 1: I'm so proud of him.

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Speaker 2: What is this?

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Speaker 1: On top of that, I have never had such excellent

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Speaker 1: communication with any prior partner or such bad communication as

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Speaker 1: it was before, what is going on? If I ask,

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Speaker 1: I am allowed to his phone, Facebook and email. Okay,

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Speaker 1: so he's being more open. If I'm feeling insecure, we

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Speaker 1: can talk about it. The problem is I'm ridiculously insecure

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Speaker 1: in now.

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Speaker 2: I wonder why.

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Speaker 1: I totally can't see your insecure. Some days I wake

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Speaker 1: up and know I should walk away from this whole

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Speaker 1: thing good. I feel rotten inside and like I'm becoming

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Speaker 1: someone I don't want to be. I feel controlling. For example,

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Speaker 1: there's this girl who we hooked up with three years ago,

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Speaker 1: and they kept in touch as friends.

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Speaker 2: They're sleeping together.

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Speaker 1: Sure, she just got a job in the area and

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Speaker 1: wanted to meet.

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Speaker 2: Up with you, so she wants to sleep with them.

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Speaker 1: He was going to go until I expressed my insecurity

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Speaker 1: with the idea. He's told me he won't meet up

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Speaker 1: with her because he's making sure I'm comfortable, and that

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Speaker 1: is his number one priority right now.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, and his number two priority is that girl.

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Speaker 1: Still, I feel like I'm controlling his behavior and I'm mistrustful.

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Speaker 1: I wonder why I just sent him a text asking

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Speaker 1: if he was going to meet up with her today.

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Speaker 1: It was like I couldn't control my fingers. I don't

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Speaker 1: know what I'm doing. I'm insecure in the relationship for

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Speaker 1: good reason, but I truly see him trying.

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Speaker 2: I don't care I'm.

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Speaker 1: Trying to cheat on you.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, trying to cheat on you.

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Speaker 1: I believe he's giving it all he's got, he's given something.

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Speaker 1: I don't feel like I'm giving it enough. I hold

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Speaker 1: things against him and constantly bring up the pass.

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Speaker 2: I think you're given too much.

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Speaker 1: I don't know how to move beyond this. I feel

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Speaker 1: like a bitter old woman already. I don't want to

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Speaker 1: break it off with him, but I don't know how

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Speaker 1: to trust him either. I feel like I'm punishing him sometimes,

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Speaker 1: and it's painful for both of us. How do I

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Speaker 1: just let it go? There are at its, there are updates.

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Speaker 1: But Sophia, do we think we should give this guy

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Speaker 1: another chance?

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Speaker 2: No? How do I let it go? You let him goged, okay,

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Speaker 2: changed clothes, probably from all the people he's sleeping with.

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Speaker 1: I also feel I should add that I once cheated

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Speaker 1: on a boyfriend. I understand that in this relationship some

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Speaker 1: level of empathy for my current boyfriend, and that we

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Speaker 1: are both human beings.

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Speaker 2: This stuff happens eight times.

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Speaker 1: I think I might now have a fully forgiven myself

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Speaker 1: as possible. I'm saying out of the desire for penance.

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Speaker 2: We all know that you're a maschist. That's very obvious

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Speaker 2: from this post.

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Speaker 1: I mean, maybe she likes it.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, she's like, oh, maybe after the tenth time he cheats.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, it's like it's like the equivalent of like ten

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Speaker 1: hail Mary's and four our fathers.

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Speaker 2: You know exactly, She's.

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Speaker 1: Gotta get cheated on eight times, then you're absolved at

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Speaker 1: it too. I've decided to go in for a therapy

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Speaker 1: assessment tomorrow through my university. I'm not sure that I

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Speaker 1: want to leave him. I'm sure, but I don't know

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Speaker 1: that I can endure my crazy thoughts and feelings of

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Speaker 1: mistrust much longer. All the comments are helping me so

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Speaker 1: much right now. Thank you. I feel like I need

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Speaker 1: to be constantly told that this is bad. It's bad,

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Speaker 1: but what is good is you're good in therapy to

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Speaker 1: figure it out. Even just writing this edit, I feel

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Speaker 1: like I'm wavering and I have to go back down

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Speaker 1: and read what you guys have written over and over.

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Speaker 1: We got an edit three. I went to my therapy appointment.

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Speaker 2: Today.

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Speaker 1: Nice turned out to only be a screening through which

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Speaker 1: they would match me up with a therapist through the university.

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Speaker 1: The screener suggested, however, that I seek long term therapy.

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Speaker 1: The screeners like, this girl needs it, and.

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Speaker 2: She told her the problem and she's like, oh honey,

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Speaker 2: I give you my card.

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Speaker 1: I'm giving you my personal phone number. That I seek

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Speaker 1: long term therapy with a private practitioner, and was given

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Speaker 1: referrals to three different people. I felt like I walked

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Speaker 1: into the counseling office all zombied out, but that calling

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Speaker 1: these people is going to take willpower, and then I

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Speaker 1: need to follow through. I'm still talking with my boyfriend,

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Speaker 1: but only intermittently. I will be leaving him as soon

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Speaker 1: as I find an ounce of strength to do so.

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Speaker 1: I wish I had been able to see an actual

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Speaker 1: therapist's day and get some sort of direction on how

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Speaker 1: to build that strength up or what I can do

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Speaker 1: in the meantime to protect myself emotionally. I think like,

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Speaker 1: hang out with your friends, yeah, go to the gym.

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Speaker 2: Get a support system, or be around your support system.

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Speaker 1: Yeah one, I'm a wreck, but I'll fall through Reddit

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Speaker 1: and we got an updates.

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Speaker 2: Oh boy, I don't know. He said, like, well, whenever

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Speaker 2: I get an ounce of strength, I'm going to break

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Speaker 2: up with them. If you already are on the you

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Speaker 2: know page of I want to break up with him,

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Speaker 2: I think that you need to just do it, rip

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Speaker 2: the band it off. I know it feels harder than

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Speaker 2: it sounds, but just just just go over there to

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Speaker 2: break up and then leave and then run away.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, but we got an update. My significant other pick

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Speaker 1: me up from an impromptu dinner this evening. I spent

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Speaker 1: the entire dinner trying to enjoy myself and him and

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Speaker 1: us together, but I couldn't do it. I'd promise myself

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Speaker 1: that I wouldn't bring up my insecurity anymore or questioned

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Speaker 1: him any further about the cheating, But as we were

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Speaker 1: leaving the restaurants, it all started coming out of me again.

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Speaker 1: Before we got in the car, I watched a laughing

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Speaker 1: girl piggyback on her guy's back across the street, and

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Speaker 1: I realized that we might not ever have that sort

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Speaker 1: of simple awesomeness again. I've been reeling from the cheating

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Speaker 1: NonStop for three months now, and it's only gotten worse

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Speaker 1: and worse. We kept talking the parking lot outside my apartment,

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Speaker 1: and it all just sort of devolved into a pulpy

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Speaker 1: mess within an hour. I forced myself to tell him

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Speaker 1: that I couldn't do it anymore.

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Speaker 2: She's doing it, she's doing it.

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Speaker 1: She's doing it, and that I was so sorry. But

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Speaker 1: I tried as hard as I could, just like I

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Speaker 1: promised I would when we got back together. I truly did.

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Speaker 1: I'm exhausted, I'm losing clumps of my hair. Girl, Oh

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Speaker 1: my back has started hurt, and I have stomach pains.

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Speaker 2: You're experiencing like so much anxiety, you know, on a

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Speaker 2: day to day basis, Like she said, Oh, well, when

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Speaker 2: I when I wasn't with him, I couldn't eat, I

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Speaker 2: couldn't do this. It's like you're you're so much worse

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Speaker 2: with him than you were without.

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Speaker 1: Well, we got more to this story, so I'm going

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Speaker 1: to jump into it. But he asked if he could

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Speaker 1: come walk me up to my door. I said that

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Speaker 1: I would walk myself, and as I started to get out,

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Speaker 1: he stopped me and begged me to stay. He said

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Speaker 1: that he was all mine and then I have him forever,

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Speaker 1: and that he's so sorry. He kept repeating how sorry

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Speaker 1: he was and it felt so incredibly genuine. No, don't

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Speaker 1: do it. I had such and affing a hard time

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Speaker 1: getting out of that car, but I did it. He

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Speaker 1: then followed me into the parking lot and hugged me

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Speaker 1: and said he was thankful I tried, and he loves me,

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Speaker 1: and he's so sorry. It broke my affing heart. I

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Speaker 1: don't know how I kept walking, hugged him back, but

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Speaker 1: I kept walking. He called me ten minutes later on

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Speaker 1: his drive home, saying he doesn't accept that this is

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Speaker 1: over and that he will wait for my call.

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Speaker 2: Oh wait a long time, bud.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, you'll be your own life. He said. He won't

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Speaker 1: text or facebook me or call me or anything, but

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Speaker 1: he'll be there well and if I'm ready. I hate

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Speaker 1: thought with his eight different women. I told him I

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Speaker 1: wouldn't be ready for a long time, and then it

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Speaker 1: was silent.

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Speaker 2: Don't say I wouldn't be ready for a long time.

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Speaker 1: And we both said goodbye.

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Speaker 2: That implies that you will be ready someday.

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Speaker 1: I went through my apartment and purged him. It was

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Speaker 1: the effing saddest thing I've ever done, to throw away

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Speaker 1: the Valentine's Day flowers in an empty dumpster to get

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Speaker 1: rid of the lonely sock you left over at my

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Speaker 1: house to throw away, the pajama pants I stole from him,

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Speaker 1: the pancake mix he made me pancakes with. I feel

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Speaker 1: so broken and exhausted and sad. I don't know how

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Speaker 1: I walked away tonight, and I don't know how I'm

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Speaker 1: going to stay away.

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Speaker 2: You're going to block him, block him, You're to block him.

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Speaker 1: I love him, and I feel so terrible about how

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Speaker 1: much he's hurting right now because of me. Because I

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Speaker 1: couldn't do it. I don't know how to grieve this

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Speaker 1: or what to do with myself. It's more fear than anything,

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Speaker 1: to be honest, though I feel pretty numb right now.

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Speaker 1: It was the only way I could walk away at

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Speaker 1: a moment of numbness from somewhere, I know that tomorrow

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Speaker 1: morning is going to be absolute crap, And if it's not,

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Speaker 1: what does that say about me? There's another relevant updates,

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Speaker 1: But Sophia, Yeah, I mean.

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Speaker 2: Op, he got there. She dragged herself across the finish line.

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Speaker 2: I'll take what I can get, But uh, wow, girl,

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Speaker 2: you're gonna take that recommendation for the long term term therapy.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, we got a little bit more of this story.

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Speaker 1: So anyway, that's my update. Thank you for all of

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Speaker 1: your help. I feel like I still need a lot

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Speaker 1: of it, though I don't know what I'm doing or

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Speaker 1: where I'm going, and there isn't edits there is edit

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Speaker 1: all right, he called me no, he said he was

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Speaker 1: flyre what this guy lies to say that if I

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Speaker 1: didn't take him back, he would turn into the basis

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Speaker 1: husk of a human and not give a crap about

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Speaker 1: anyone or anything in the world. Old he told me

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Speaker 1: it was his fault that he wasn't loving enough. But

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Speaker 1: I should have Slash, could have tried harder. And he's

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Speaker 1: going to wait for me because he thinks I'm just

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Speaker 1: in the wrong mind frame. I barely thought about him today,

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Speaker 1: and when I did, it was only because I saw

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Speaker 1: things that reminded me of him, and not on my

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Speaker 1: own volition. I felt calm and had a good day.

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Speaker 1: I guess, so he.

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Speaker 2: Heck yeah, I mean she was saying, like, oh, what

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Speaker 2: does it mean if I don't even think about it,

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Speaker 2: or like if I have a good day, it means

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Speaker 2: that you've been released from a curse.

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Speaker 1: But I think I think because he reached out, I

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Speaker 1: feel like she's she's still like, I think she barely

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Speaker 1: thought about him or was that last night? Oh he

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Speaker 1: called me last That's what I'm saying. Oh, it seems

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Speaker 1: like she's like, oh, so called late and she's like

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Speaker 1: and she's like, you know what I'm done. Yeah, that's good, that's.

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Speaker 2: Good, and that it probably will not last that feeling.

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Speaker 2: You're probably gonna go in waves of being like, oh,

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Speaker 2: I want to be back together with him? What am

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Speaker 2: I doing? What am I doing?

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Speaker 1: And then get back together. I'll get back together.

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Speaker 2: My wife had an affair with the best man, and

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Speaker 2: she accidentally confessed it to me.

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Speaker 1: He's the best man for a reason, he slams down.

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Speaker 2: The timeframe is important here. We have been married for

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Speaker 2: three years. We were together as a couple for two

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Speaker 2: years before that, so we've been together for about five years.

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Speaker 2: By the way, this comes from my POxy at thirty

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Speaker 2: two and if you want to submit your own stories,

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Speaker 2: go to the r slash Okay storytime supparate it. So

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Speaker 2: two weekends ago, her sister got married, and of course

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Speaker 2: my wife is at the wedding party. So as you

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Speaker 2: would expect, she spent two weeks prior to the wedding.

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Speaker 2: Helping your sister get everything ready, no big deal at all.

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Speaker 2: She kept me informed and I knew this was gonna happen.

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Speaker 2: She took that Wednesday to Friday off of work to

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Speaker 2: help her, and in fact stayed with her for three days.

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Speaker 2: I certainly know her sister, but I barely know the

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Speaker 2: guy who is now my brother in law. In fact,

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Speaker 2: I only met him a few time, but he seems

350
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Speaker 2: nice enough. I show up Saturday morning, a few hours

351
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Speaker 2: before the ceremony in hopes of stealing just a few

352
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Speaker 2: minutes to see her, not wanting to intrude on the

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Speaker 2: day since I know she is busy, but I hadn't

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Speaker 2: seen her since Tuesday. She sees me outside of her parents'

355
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Speaker 2: house and sends her brother out to tell me that

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Speaker 2: she'll come out and see me in the car, which

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Speaker 2: I thought was odd but whatever. She finally comes out

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Speaker 2: and sits in the seat next to me and gives

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Speaker 2: me a kiss, But instead of acting happy to see

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Speaker 2: me or whatever, she tells me that she has to

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Speaker 2: talk to me and she doesn't want it to ruin

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Speaker 2: her sister's day. Oh God, She's like, I've got something

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Speaker 2: to tell you, but don't make a big deal about it, saying.

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Speaker 1: I feel like this is coming from a person who

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Speaker 1: just did a thing that made a big deal.

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Speaker 2: I think, so, oh God. She informs me that at

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Speaker 2: the reception, if I still want to go, I might

368
00:17:53,600 --> 00:17:56,239
Speaker 2: hear some things about the best man and her, and

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Speaker 2: she didn't want to be awkward or weird. I just

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Speaker 2: kind of sat there, stunned. She said that about four

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Speaker 2: years ago.

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Speaker 1: Four years, they've been dating and together in a relationship

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Speaker 1: for five five Oh oh no, she had.

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Speaker 2: A fling with him, and that it didn't mean anything,

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Speaker 2: but she was aware that by nature, I'm somewhat jealous,

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Speaker 2: and she wanted me to know in advance so that

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Speaker 2: if I heard something that I wouldn't be surprised. How

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Speaker 2: do you so callously admit to cheating?

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Speaker 1: Oh this is not her first rodeo, or is it?

380
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Speaker 1: I don't think so. I think I think she's I

381
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Speaker 1: think she's been cheating on the daily and this is

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Speaker 1: the only one that she's like, oh, like, I actually

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Speaker 1: have to tell him.

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Speaker 2: I think she's gotten the dates wrong. I think she

385
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Speaker 2: forgot that they've been together for.

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Speaker 1: Five years or five years.

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Speaker 2: I think she's gotten the dates wrong.

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Speaker 1: Oh so she doesn't even realized.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, that's my because I think.

390
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Speaker 1: She got the dates wrong and she cheats a lot.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I also thought could yeah, And I just kind

392
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Speaker 2: of sat there. This was not how I thought my

393
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Speaker 2: morning would go. But I told her I appreciated knowing

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Speaker 2: it and that it certainly wasn't a big deal. Now,

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Speaker 2: what are you just like a fuse?

396
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Speaker 1: It's about a blow up. You've been dating for five years.

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Speaker 1: She jeated on you.

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Speaker 2: She went back an house and I went to eat

399
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Speaker 2: lunch and decided to meet her at the church. As

400
00:19:21,800 --> 00:19:24,960
Speaker 2: I'm eating and reading my phone, it dawns on me.

401
00:19:25,240 --> 00:19:28,520
Speaker 2: She said she had a fling with him four years ago,

402
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Speaker 2: and we've been together five.

403
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Speaker 1: Quick maths, my friend quick maths.

404
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Speaker 2: Not really. He took some time.

405
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Speaker 1: Slow to very slow maths.

406
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Speaker 2: My first reaction was to blow it off and think

407
00:19:40,920 --> 00:19:43,359
Speaker 2: that she just told me the wrong time. But the

408
00:19:43,400 --> 00:19:45,520
Speaker 2: more I thought about it, the more I started remember

409
00:19:45,560 --> 00:19:47,439
Speaker 2: about a year and a half of us being together,

410
00:19:48,080 --> 00:19:50,640
Speaker 2: she had a phase where she was really sketchy about

411
00:19:50,640 --> 00:19:54,520
Speaker 2: her behavior, wasn't available when she normally was, and went

412
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Speaker 2: on two weekend camping trips that were with friends from work.

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Speaker 2: Of course, I'm a little not it up over this,

414
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Speaker 2: but I know I have a long day ahead of me. Ope,

415
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Speaker 2: he's way too chill about this.

416
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Speaker 1: Yeah, he's like, yeah, I don't worry about that.

417
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Speaker 2: Later, of course I'm upset, but I don't have time.

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Speaker 1: Yeah.

419
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Speaker 2: I go to the wedding and sit there watching everything.

420
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Speaker 2: After the wedding, they have a line that you walk

421
00:20:16,200 --> 00:20:19,399
Speaker 2: by and congratulate the bride and groom, and the wedding

422
00:20:19,480 --> 00:20:21,960
Speaker 2: party is standing in line as well. My wife is

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Speaker 2: standing with some other guy. I don't know him at all,

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Speaker 2: but the best man was there, and I just went

425
00:20:26,800 --> 00:20:29,160
Speaker 2: down the line and acted like it was no big deal.

426
00:20:29,840 --> 00:20:32,720
Speaker 2: Get to the reception and it takes forever for them

427
00:20:32,760 --> 00:20:35,800
Speaker 2: to come because of photos. She finally gets there and

428
00:20:35,840 --> 00:20:39,120
Speaker 2: sits with me. I decided not to say anything, as

429
00:20:39,119 --> 00:20:41,760
Speaker 2: I didn't want to distract from the day, but instead

430
00:20:41,800 --> 00:20:43,919
Speaker 2: of just letting it go, she then tells me that

431
00:20:44,040 --> 00:20:47,159
Speaker 2: each of the groom's men or bridesmaids are going to

432
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Speaker 2: dance and that she is going to be dancing with him.

433
00:20:51,200 --> 00:20:53,439
Speaker 2: I ask why when she was not his partner for

434
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Speaker 2: the party, and she said that the main of honor

435
00:20:55,560 --> 00:20:57,760
Speaker 2: and her partner were actually married and wanted to dance

436
00:20:57,800 --> 00:21:00,400
Speaker 2: with each other. At this point, I'm a little more

437
00:21:00,440 --> 00:21:03,560
Speaker 2: than perturbed, but I try and not let it show. Thankfully,

438
00:21:03,640 --> 00:21:06,639
Speaker 2: I was smart enough to not drink, because I freely

439
00:21:06,680 --> 00:21:09,600
Speaker 2: admit I'm an angry, wasted person, so I know when

440
00:21:09,680 --> 00:21:12,600
Speaker 2: not to even partake. She talks to everyone around her,

441
00:21:12,640 --> 00:21:15,320
Speaker 2: and then the dance comes and he comes over and

442
00:21:15,400 --> 00:21:18,159
Speaker 2: extends his arm and she gets up. I try not

443
00:21:18,240 --> 00:21:20,760
Speaker 2: to watch, and in fact I make it a point

444
00:21:20,800 --> 00:21:23,080
Speaker 2: not to. She comes back with him in tow and

445
00:21:23,119 --> 00:21:26,400
Speaker 2: they are joking like the best of friends. She decides

446
00:21:26,440 --> 00:21:28,680
Speaker 2: that it would be a good idea to introduce us,

447
00:21:28,720 --> 00:21:30,760
Speaker 2: and while I didn't say to f Off like I

448
00:21:30,840 --> 00:21:34,840
Speaker 2: wanted to, my greeting to him was probably less than cordial,

449
00:21:34,960 --> 00:21:37,080
Speaker 2: but it did not deter him from sitting and talking

450
00:21:37,119 --> 00:21:39,760
Speaker 2: with her for a few minutes. The more they sat

451
00:21:39,800 --> 00:21:44,160
Speaker 2: and talked and reminisced about old times and places, the

452
00:21:44,200 --> 00:21:45,160
Speaker 2: matter I got.

453
00:21:45,520 --> 00:21:48,760
Speaker 1: I mean, even if she didn't cheat, even if there

454
00:21:48,920 --> 00:21:54,000
Speaker 1: wasn't overlap, like put some boundaries here, like you know,

455
00:21:54,200 --> 00:21:58,240
Speaker 1: don't dance and be all lovey lovey and be all

456
00:21:58,320 --> 00:21:59,879
Speaker 1: flirty right in front of your.

457
00:21:59,720 --> 00:22:00,960
Speaker 2: Part, I mean, like ridiculous.

458
00:22:00,960 --> 00:22:03,800
Speaker 1: I have some respect, like even if I feel like

459
00:22:03,920 --> 00:22:08,080
Speaker 1: for people that you have had past romantic history with,

460
00:22:08,560 --> 00:22:12,600
Speaker 1: the walls with them should be higher. I agree, you know,

461
00:22:12,760 --> 00:22:14,880
Speaker 1: like you should shud, I feel like you should give

462
00:22:15,280 --> 00:22:18,639
Speaker 1: even more space. I agree than you would, uh, just

463
00:22:18,680 --> 00:22:19,600
Speaker 1: like any old person.

464
00:22:20,040 --> 00:22:22,280
Speaker 2: Eventually I got up and went to the bathroom, and

465
00:22:22,280 --> 00:22:24,879
Speaker 2: when I came back, he was gone. She decided to

466
00:22:24,880 --> 00:22:26,840
Speaker 2: tell me that she thought I was rude, which was

467
00:22:26,920 --> 00:22:28,560
Speaker 2: not what I was all about here, and at that

468
00:22:28,640 --> 00:22:31,040
Speaker 2: moment I told her that this wasn't the time or

469
00:22:31,080 --> 00:22:33,560
Speaker 2: place to talk about it, but rest assured we would

470
00:22:33,560 --> 00:22:36,000
Speaker 2: talk about it later. She sat there and then said

471
00:22:36,000 --> 00:22:38,440
Speaker 2: that she was going to change clothes, and as soon

472
00:22:38,480 --> 00:22:40,560
Speaker 2: as she got back, she was telling her sister that

473
00:22:40,640 --> 00:22:43,439
Speaker 2: we were leaving because I had ruined her day, but

474
00:22:43,520 --> 00:22:45,880
Speaker 2: she didn't want me to ruin her sister's day as well.

475
00:22:46,400 --> 00:22:49,040
Speaker 2: I told her that I was perfectly capable of not

476
00:22:49,119 --> 00:22:52,520
Speaker 2: being a bother to her or her sister the rest

477
00:22:52,560 --> 00:22:54,639
Speaker 2: of the day, and that I did not want to

478
00:22:54,640 --> 00:22:56,200
Speaker 2: be the cause of any drama.

479
00:22:55,920 --> 00:23:01,560
Speaker 1: So I would prefer to any drama is being He's.

480
00:23:01,119 --> 00:23:03,000
Speaker 2: Making so much less drama than he could.

481
00:23:03,240 --> 00:23:05,520
Speaker 1: Oh Toby right now and I also I hate how

482
00:23:05,560 --> 00:23:08,159
Speaker 1: she is, Like, look at what he's doing. He's ruining

483
00:23:08,200 --> 00:23:10,399
Speaker 1: the day I have to leave. A man's just like

484
00:23:10,440 --> 00:23:11,000
Speaker 1: sitting there.

485
00:23:11,040 --> 00:23:14,320
Speaker 2: He's just sitting there. Man. She went and changed clothes

486
00:23:14,440 --> 00:23:16,800
Speaker 2: and then came back all in a huff. Now I

487
00:23:16,880 --> 00:23:19,280
Speaker 2: understand I have not said a word to her. I

488
00:23:19,320 --> 00:23:22,040
Speaker 2: even shook the other guy's hand. I guess I just

489
00:23:22,080 --> 00:23:24,800
Speaker 2: looked miserable, So that's what she was basing this off of.

490
00:23:25,200 --> 00:23:27,840
Speaker 2: She was adamant about not staying, and so I said

491
00:23:27,840 --> 00:23:30,480
Speaker 2: that if she really wanted to go, we could go,

492
00:23:31,040 --> 00:23:33,560
Speaker 2: but if she would rather stay, I would be happy

493
00:23:33,600 --> 00:23:35,640
Speaker 2: to stay. Or if she would like since I came

494
00:23:35,680 --> 00:23:38,440
Speaker 2: in my own car, I would leave so she could stay.

495
00:23:38,800 --> 00:23:40,880
Speaker 2: She at first said that we should stay, but then

496
00:23:40,960 --> 00:23:43,040
Speaker 2: said if I couldn't act any better, I should leave.

497
00:23:43,400 --> 00:23:46,080
Speaker 2: I asked how I was acting, and she said it

498
00:23:46,119 --> 00:23:48,000
Speaker 2: was obvious I was trying to be like a silver

499
00:23:48,080 --> 00:23:50,879
Speaker 2: back gorilla, wanting to fight. I didn't know whether to

500
00:23:51,000 --> 00:23:54,320
Speaker 2: laugh in her face or be offended. I went back

501
00:23:54,359 --> 00:23:57,080
Speaker 2: in and sat down while she mingled with the other guests.

502
00:23:57,400 --> 00:23:59,159
Speaker 2: I talked with her brother for a while, but then

503
00:23:59,240 --> 00:24:02,840
Speaker 2: ultimately ended up back at our table. Talking with her grandma.

504
00:24:02,880 --> 00:24:04,560
Speaker 1: Would you leave or would you stay?

505
00:24:04,720 --> 00:24:06,600
Speaker 2: I would have confronted her way earlier.

506
00:24:07,040 --> 00:24:11,040
Speaker 1: Yeah, but I mean, you also don't want to derail

507
00:24:11,119 --> 00:24:12,520
Speaker 1: the wedding too, you know.

508
00:24:12,840 --> 00:24:14,800
Speaker 2: Or but he found out before the wedding started.

509
00:24:14,640 --> 00:24:17,240
Speaker 1: Like you would have said something before he didn't. But

510
00:24:17,280 --> 00:24:20,200
Speaker 1: he didn't do quick mass, that's true. Yeah, he was

511
00:24:20,600 --> 00:24:23,160
Speaker 1: buffering for a while. So like I think I would

512
00:24:23,240 --> 00:24:24,640
Speaker 1: leave the wedding, he would leave the.

513
00:24:24,560 --> 00:24:26,520
Speaker 2: Wedding, yeah, and then confront after.

514
00:24:26,720 --> 00:24:28,960
Speaker 1: Yeah. I feel like I wouldn't be chill enough to

515
00:24:28,960 --> 00:24:30,520
Speaker 1: stay at the wedding. I feel like I would feel

516
00:24:30,640 --> 00:24:34,480
Speaker 1: terrible to be sad. I probably won't cry a little bit.

517
00:24:34,720 --> 00:24:37,320
Speaker 2: We leave at the same time, and I arrived home

518
00:24:37,560 --> 00:24:40,040
Speaker 2: just before she did. I was sitting in the living

519
00:24:40,080 --> 00:24:42,040
Speaker 2: room waiting on her when she came in and did

520
00:24:42,080 --> 00:24:44,520
Speaker 2: not beat around the bush. I simply asked her to

521
00:24:44,640 --> 00:24:46,760
Speaker 2: retell me the story about this other guy, and she

522
00:24:46,960 --> 00:24:52,159
Speaker 2: said it word for word like before. After sitting and

523
00:24:52,200 --> 00:24:54,320
Speaker 2: looking at her for a time, I just said, are

524
00:24:54,400 --> 00:24:58,439
Speaker 2: you sure about the time frame, and she said she

525
00:24:58,560 --> 00:25:01,840
Speaker 2: want Oh god. I then reminded her that we have

526
00:25:01,960 --> 00:25:06,919
Speaker 2: been together for five years, so this fling was well

527
00:25:06,960 --> 00:25:09,840
Speaker 2: over a year into our being together. What happened next?

528
00:25:09,920 --> 00:25:11,959
Speaker 2: I can't confront final.

529
00:25:12,119 --> 00:25:16,200
Speaker 1: Yes, don time man has been a holding that car

530
00:25:16,680 --> 00:25:19,439
Speaker 1: just just just sitting on it, just sitting on it

531
00:25:19,560 --> 00:25:22,480
Speaker 1: like a little little hot coal, and I'm ready for

532
00:25:22,520 --> 00:25:23,119
Speaker 1: it to breathe.

533
00:25:23,440 --> 00:25:26,680
Speaker 2: What happened next? I can't really put into words. Instead

534
00:25:26,720 --> 00:25:30,040
Speaker 2: of being flustered or denying or anything, she simply said,

535
00:25:30,080 --> 00:25:34,640
Speaker 2: I know, sorry, she didn't get the math wrong. She

536
00:25:34,760 --> 00:25:40,360
Speaker 2: just doesn't He just doesn't care. I start to explain,

537
00:25:40,920 --> 00:25:42,720
Speaker 2: and she tells me that they work together and that

538
00:25:42,760 --> 00:25:45,320
Speaker 2: it was just a physical thing. It was just a

539
00:25:45,480 --> 00:25:46,160
Speaker 2: physical thing.

540
00:25:46,280 --> 00:25:48,439
Speaker 1: That's cheating. I'm sick of this.

541
00:25:48,720 --> 00:25:49,359
Speaker 2: Is this woman?

542
00:25:49,920 --> 00:25:53,480
Speaker 1: Who is this person she is? Does she not know

543
00:25:53,520 --> 00:25:57,679
Speaker 1: the rules of engagement, the rules of dating? That is cheating.

544
00:25:57,680 --> 00:26:01,440
Speaker 1: You've just described cheating, and says run my guy.

545
00:26:02,560 --> 00:26:04,440
Speaker 2: And she felt like we weren't in a great place

546
00:26:04,440 --> 00:26:06,600
Speaker 2: at the time, and that she never had any feelings

547
00:26:06,640 --> 00:26:10,040
Speaker 2: for him and never had any real intentions of leaving me.

548
00:26:10,280 --> 00:26:12,760
Speaker 2: She just was having some fun for a few weekends.

549
00:26:13,160 --> 00:26:16,000
Speaker 2: She said it was She said that it was probably

550
00:26:16,040 --> 00:26:18,280
Speaker 2: a mistake on her part, probably.

551
00:26:18,200 --> 00:26:21,560
Speaker 1: But she's not even admitting it's a mistake. She's like, oh, no, no,

552
00:26:21,920 --> 00:26:22,760
Speaker 1: I did a good thing.

553
00:26:23,240 --> 00:26:25,920
Speaker 2: I did a good Oh sorry, sorry, I didn't finish

554
00:26:25,960 --> 00:26:28,600
Speaker 2: that sentence. She said it was probably a mistake on

555
00:26:28,640 --> 00:26:31,360
Speaker 2: her part to tell me now, but she didn't want

556
00:26:31,400 --> 00:26:32,200
Speaker 2: me to get blindsided.

557
00:26:32,320 --> 00:26:33,960
Speaker 1: Yeah, She's like, I should have just never told you.

558
00:26:35,119 --> 00:26:37,160
Speaker 2: I did not take this the way she thought I would.

559
00:26:37,160 --> 00:26:40,879
Speaker 2: I guess. We had a very large argument and ended

560
00:26:40,880 --> 00:26:43,480
Speaker 2: when she told me I was being a child about

561
00:26:43,520 --> 00:26:44,000
Speaker 2: all of this.

562
00:26:44,560 --> 00:26:45,480
Speaker 1: You cheated.

563
00:26:45,760 --> 00:26:48,919
Speaker 2: I feel like she's treating him like a child, in

564
00:26:48,960 --> 00:26:51,040
Speaker 2: the sense of like when a child falls down and

565
00:26:51,080 --> 00:26:52,680
Speaker 2: instead of being like, oh my god, are you okay,

566
00:26:52,760 --> 00:26:56,480
Speaker 2: like are you hurt, being like you're good, child, look

567
00:26:56,480 --> 00:26:58,360
Speaker 2: good to you, and the child's like, oh, I guess

568
00:26:58,400 --> 00:27:00,679
Speaker 2: I am, Yes, I am. I feel like that's what

569
00:27:00,720 --> 00:27:02,919
Speaker 2: she was hoping for. She's like, yeah, I cheated on you,

570
00:27:03,200 --> 00:27:07,000
Speaker 2: so that we were married and this happened way before that,

571
00:27:07,800 --> 00:27:10,119
Speaker 2: and that our life together now has nothing to do

572
00:27:10,240 --> 00:27:13,480
Speaker 2: with him or that time. Well. Two things One I

573
00:27:13,520 --> 00:27:16,760
Speaker 2: adamantly disagree with about this has no bearing on us,

574
00:27:17,119 --> 00:27:19,359
Speaker 2: she having cheated on me and doesn't even have the

575
00:27:19,359 --> 00:27:23,000
Speaker 2: god dang decency that feel guilty about it. Two, I

576
00:27:23,080 --> 00:27:25,480
Speaker 2: hate being told I'm childish when I get upset it

577
00:27:25,560 --> 00:27:28,560
Speaker 2: or something. It pisses me off to no end because

578
00:27:28,560 --> 00:27:31,159
Speaker 2: that is her way of acting superior to me. I

579
00:27:31,240 --> 00:27:33,440
Speaker 2: told her I needed time to think, and she told

580
00:27:33,480 --> 00:27:35,840
Speaker 2: me there was nothing to think about. We loved each

581
00:27:35,840 --> 00:27:38,840
Speaker 2: other and this didn't change anything. Girl, he doesn't love

582
00:27:38,840 --> 00:27:41,720
Speaker 2: you anymore. That was two weeks ago, and I still

583
00:27:41,760 --> 00:27:44,600
Speaker 2: am not over it. She's been trying the past few

584
00:27:44,840 --> 00:27:47,639
Speaker 2: days to get me to talk to her, but I

585
00:27:47,680 --> 00:27:50,000
Speaker 2: admit that, for whatever reason, I'm not viewing her the

586
00:27:50,040 --> 00:27:52,439
Speaker 2: same as I did before. Part of me is like

587
00:27:52,680 --> 00:27:55,480
Speaker 2: that this is stupid. It happened a few years ago

588
00:27:55,640 --> 00:27:58,600
Speaker 2: and we're married now and there hasn't been any problems

589
00:27:58,640 --> 00:28:00,399
Speaker 2: at all. But then part of me is like I

590
00:28:00,480 --> 00:28:02,560
Speaker 2: just found out she cheated on me, and it hurts

591
00:28:02,560 --> 00:28:05,040
Speaker 2: like a mother effort. And what makes it worse is

592
00:28:05,080 --> 00:28:08,680
Speaker 2: that instead of trying to understand how I feel, she's

593
00:28:08,680 --> 00:28:11,920
Speaker 2: trying to guilt me into just not even thinking about it.

594
00:28:12,280 --> 00:28:14,960
Speaker 2: I don't know what to do. And there is an update, folks.

595
00:28:15,320 --> 00:28:19,160
Speaker 1: I mean, I think, boy, maybe maybe if she said

596
00:28:19,280 --> 00:28:21,880
Speaker 1: I cheat on you and I'm sorry and I want

597
00:28:21,880 --> 00:28:25,159
Speaker 1: to work through this, you could get therapy, or you

598
00:28:25,160 --> 00:28:28,000
Speaker 1: could have a long conversations with each other and work

599
00:28:28,160 --> 00:28:34,399
Speaker 1: towards you know, a relationship that that feels that feels good.

600
00:28:34,560 --> 00:28:37,240
Speaker 1: It would damage it, for sure, but maybe you could

601
00:28:37,280 --> 00:28:40,880
Speaker 1: work towards something. Yeah, but you can't work towards something

602
00:28:40,920 --> 00:28:43,480
Speaker 1: if she doesn't even admit that this is an issue

603
00:28:43,520 --> 00:28:46,240
Speaker 1: or a problem. Like, no amount of therapy, no amount

604
00:28:46,240 --> 00:28:50,600
Speaker 1: of conversation will fix someone who just will not admit

605
00:28:50,960 --> 00:28:51,520
Speaker 1: to anything.

606
00:28:51,560 --> 00:28:53,800
Speaker 2: She doesn't think that she's done anything wrong.

607
00:28:53,720 --> 00:28:57,040
Speaker 1: And that I think honestly, like usually we're like, hey,

608
00:28:57,040 --> 00:28:58,840
Speaker 1: you know, you know, get a little therapy and then

609
00:28:58,880 --> 00:29:01,280
Speaker 1: maybe divorce. I feel like this is like going to

610
00:29:01,360 --> 00:29:05,120
Speaker 1: go straight to divorce because she's not willing to work

611
00:29:05,160 --> 00:29:05,640
Speaker 1: on it. No.

612
00:29:06,160 --> 00:29:09,600
Speaker 2: I mean if she cannot even admit, well, she admitted

613
00:29:09,640 --> 00:29:12,120
Speaker 2: so readily that she cheated on you because she didn't

614
00:29:12,120 --> 00:29:13,200
Speaker 2: even see a problem with it.

615
00:29:13,280 --> 00:29:15,320
Speaker 1: I didn't see it, dude. And with that, I mean

616
00:29:15,320 --> 00:29:18,240
Speaker 1: that's something like the psychopath behavior.

617
00:29:18,440 --> 00:29:22,240
Speaker 2: Yeah. Updates. First, I want to clarify something from my

618
00:29:22,320 --> 00:29:25,080
Speaker 2: first post that I really did not spell out very well.

619
00:29:25,800 --> 00:29:28,880
Speaker 2: It doesn't have any real bearing on anything, but for

620
00:29:28,920 --> 00:29:31,480
Speaker 2: some reason it bugs me that I made this part

621
00:29:32,080 --> 00:29:34,720
Speaker 2: sort of Murky. The maid of honor not my wife

622
00:29:34,760 --> 00:29:36,920
Speaker 2: was married to the groomsman who my wife walked down

623
00:29:36,960 --> 00:29:39,240
Speaker 2: the aisle with. There were some people who thought my

624
00:29:39,240 --> 00:29:41,240
Speaker 2: wife was trying to arrange the dance, but I do

625
00:29:41,360 --> 00:29:44,320
Speaker 2: know for a fact that this part was legit. However,

626
00:29:44,920 --> 00:29:48,320
Speaker 2: it doesn't mean she didn't try and offer to let

627
00:29:48,320 --> 00:29:50,480
Speaker 2: them dance round any other form of manipulation.

628
00:29:51,160 --> 00:29:54,480
Speaker 1: She's kind of gaslighting, she is. It's not a big deal,

629
00:29:54,600 --> 00:29:57,200
Speaker 1: Like we weren't even married. We were just in a relationship.

630
00:29:57,320 --> 00:29:58,680
Speaker 1: Like get over it.

631
00:29:58,800 --> 00:30:00,960
Speaker 2: Yeah, but uh, we're gonna get it to this. So

632
00:30:01,280 --> 00:30:03,280
Speaker 2: the maid of honor not my wife was married to

633
00:30:03,280 --> 00:30:05,760
Speaker 2: the groomsman who my wife walked down the aisle with.

634
00:30:06,160 --> 00:30:08,320
Speaker 2: There were some people who felt my wife was trying

635
00:30:08,320 --> 00:30:10,680
Speaker 2: to arrange the dance, but I knew. But I know

636
00:30:10,840 --> 00:30:13,840
Speaker 2: for a fact that this part was legit. However, it

637
00:30:13,880 --> 00:30:16,160
Speaker 2: doesn't mean she didn't try and offer to let them

638
00:30:16,240 --> 00:30:19,520
Speaker 2: dance or any other form of manipulation. But I just

639
00:30:19,560 --> 00:30:21,600
Speaker 2: wanted to try and clear that part up a little.

640
00:30:21,920 --> 00:30:25,400
Speaker 2: I'm here because I have gotten honest to God over

641
00:30:25,560 --> 00:30:29,080
Speaker 2: forty requests for an update since last week. Thank you

642
00:30:29,120 --> 00:30:31,360
Speaker 2: for your guys' concern on this, and I wish I

643
00:30:31,360 --> 00:30:34,040
Speaker 2: had some real ballsy statement to make about how I

644
00:30:34,120 --> 00:30:37,360
Speaker 2: stood tall and heard to the curb. But sadly, that

645
00:30:37,520 --> 00:30:38,880
Speaker 2: is just not what happened.

646
00:30:39,160 --> 00:30:43,760
Speaker 1: No ohe have standards for the love of God to

647
00:30:43,840 --> 00:30:44,280
Speaker 1: be blunt.

648
00:30:44,400 --> 00:30:47,400
Speaker 2: I'm in limbo. There have been developments, but all they

649
00:30:47,440 --> 00:30:49,720
Speaker 2: have done is make it harder for me to decide.

650
00:30:50,120 --> 00:30:53,400
Speaker 2: Last week, I was mostly angry, Then as the weekend progressed,

651
00:30:53,400 --> 00:30:56,320
Speaker 2: I became mostly sad. I want to be able to

652
00:30:56,360 --> 00:30:58,520
Speaker 2: hate her and flip that switch that tells me I'm

653
00:30:58,520 --> 00:31:01,000
Speaker 2: being walked on and I'm a suck her, But it's

654
00:31:01,040 --> 00:31:03,440
Speaker 2: just very hard for me to do that because I

655
00:31:03,520 --> 00:31:07,360
Speaker 2: still love her and this is ripping me apart. Here's

656
00:31:07,400 --> 00:31:10,480
Speaker 2: what has happened of any consequence. She finally came to

657
00:31:10,520 --> 00:31:12,600
Speaker 2: the realization that I was not going to just get

658
00:31:12,640 --> 00:31:15,880
Speaker 2: over this. This then brought her to the realization that

659
00:31:15,920 --> 00:31:18,560
Speaker 2: I might want out of the marriage. This then brought

660
00:31:18,560 --> 00:31:22,040
Speaker 2: on a near nervous breakdown from her. Someone a Lot

661
00:31:22,600 --> 00:31:25,600
Speaker 2: a Lot from the first post stated that she would

662
00:31:25,640 --> 00:31:28,200
Speaker 2: try and manipulate me like that, and believe me, I

663
00:31:28,280 --> 00:31:31,240
Speaker 2: was taking those words. Start when I thought she was

664
00:31:31,240 --> 00:31:34,520
Speaker 2: having crocodile tears. But it soon became apparent to me

665
00:31:34,640 --> 00:31:37,760
Speaker 2: that she wasn't acting or faking. She was having a

666
00:31:37,840 --> 00:31:39,160
Speaker 2: legitimate panic attack.

667
00:31:39,360 --> 00:31:43,840
Speaker 1: Oh, maybe she finally realizes that her actions have consequences.

668
00:31:43,880 --> 00:31:47,080
Speaker 2: Maybe this led to an er visit, and that led

669
00:31:47,120 --> 00:31:49,240
Speaker 2: to an overnight stay in the hospital and then to

670
00:31:49,360 --> 00:31:52,720
Speaker 2: new medications and a schedule follow up with her doctor

671
00:31:52,760 --> 00:31:53,640
Speaker 2: for later next week.

672
00:31:53,640 --> 00:31:58,880
Speaker 1: Okay, so she's not faking it. Okay, so she's a

673
00:31:58,880 --> 00:31:59,760
Speaker 1: really good actor.

674
00:31:59,800 --> 00:32:03,239
Speaker 2: Actually, this brought her family into it, and that in

675
00:32:03,280 --> 00:32:06,440
Speaker 2: turn led to long conversations all the way around. When

676
00:32:06,480 --> 00:32:08,920
Speaker 2: we got home with her family in tow I asked

677
00:32:09,080 --> 00:32:11,200
Speaker 2: what she wanted to do since there was a house

678
00:32:11,240 --> 00:32:14,360
Speaker 2: full of people, and she said she wanted to be

679
00:32:14,440 --> 00:32:16,800
Speaker 2: with her mom for a while. That was fine with me,

680
00:32:16,920 --> 00:32:19,120
Speaker 2: as I had no desire to hang around all day

681
00:32:19,160 --> 00:32:21,480
Speaker 2: with her dad or sister, so I said I was

682
00:32:21,520 --> 00:32:24,520
Speaker 2: gonna finish up something at work and would be home later.

683
00:32:24,880 --> 00:32:27,200
Speaker 2: Two hours after I get there, I get a text

684
00:32:27,240 --> 00:32:30,280
Speaker 2: from her begging me to please come home and that

685
00:32:30,360 --> 00:32:32,960
Speaker 2: she really needs me to talk with her. So I

686
00:32:33,080 --> 00:32:35,360
Speaker 2: finish up what I was doing and head home. I

687
00:32:35,400 --> 00:32:37,840
Speaker 2: am greeted on my own front porch by her dad

688
00:32:37,880 --> 00:32:40,360
Speaker 2: who asks if he can talk to me for a minute.

689
00:32:40,520 --> 00:32:42,920
Speaker 2: My anger level was already somewhat I but I was

690
00:32:43,000 --> 00:32:44,720
Speaker 2: ready to go to war if she had dumped a

691
00:32:44,800 --> 00:32:47,400
Speaker 2: crap seck of lies on me With her dad. I mean,

692
00:32:47,440 --> 00:32:49,720
Speaker 2: it's not like he and I are best friends in crap,

693
00:32:49,800 --> 00:32:52,120
Speaker 2: but I've never had a bad moment with him, So

694
00:32:52,280 --> 00:32:54,760
Speaker 2: I really wasn't going to be happy about the beaster

695
00:32:55,240 --> 00:32:56,600
Speaker 2: who broke his baby's heart.

696
00:32:56,840 --> 00:32:57,240
Speaker 1: Yeah.

697
00:32:57,280 --> 00:33:00,800
Speaker 2: We sat on our deck chairs and he with his

698
00:33:00,920 --> 00:33:04,480
Speaker 2: opening salvo. He said that she told them when had happened,

699
00:33:04,520 --> 00:33:07,200
Speaker 2: and that he wanted to apologize to me because he

700
00:33:07,240 --> 00:33:09,400
Speaker 2: said that he felt like he did a really crappy

701
00:33:09,480 --> 00:33:12,760
Speaker 2: job as a parent, and that this mindset that she

702
00:33:13,040 --> 00:33:18,000
Speaker 2: had was really a creation of her mother's. Got to

703
00:33:18,040 --> 00:33:20,800
Speaker 2: blame it on mom, and that while he loved both

704
00:33:20,840 --> 00:33:23,280
Speaker 2: of them, he said they were wrong and he had

705
00:33:23,320 --> 00:33:25,520
Speaker 2: told his wife years ago that telling the girls that

706
00:33:25,600 --> 00:33:30,080
Speaker 2: whatever happens before marriage doesn't count was a horrible idea. Ooh,

707
00:33:30,520 --> 00:33:34,480
Speaker 2: that's what they said, and value system to instill in them.

708
00:33:35,280 --> 00:33:38,640
Speaker 1: Yeah, bro, what does that say about your own marriage?

709
00:33:39,040 --> 00:33:39,600
Speaker 2: Yeah?

710
00:33:39,760 --> 00:33:40,520
Speaker 1: What is that? Said?

711
00:33:40,640 --> 00:33:40,880
Speaker 2: Dude?

712
00:33:40,920 --> 00:33:43,680
Speaker 1: She was probably cheating on you left it right before

713
00:33:43,720 --> 00:33:44,400
Speaker 1: you got married.

714
00:33:44,480 --> 00:33:49,040
Speaker 2: Sorry, if someone says, if you says to someone else, no, no, no,

715
00:33:49,160 --> 00:33:52,920
Speaker 2: don't worry. Anything before the marriage doesn't count. I would

716
00:33:52,960 --> 00:33:54,920
Speaker 2: be like, wait, wait.

717
00:33:55,600 --> 00:33:59,000
Speaker 1: I do know people with moms that have said.

718
00:33:58,920 --> 00:34:02,120
Speaker 2: I hate those something I hate that, I hate that

719
00:34:02,240 --> 00:34:05,840
Speaker 2: it is whack. Yeah. He then said that he wasn't

720
00:34:05,880 --> 00:34:08,160
Speaker 2: there to stand up for what his daughter did, but

721
00:34:08,200 --> 00:34:10,000
Speaker 2: he just wanted me to be aware that what she

722
00:34:10,120 --> 00:34:13,000
Speaker 2: was saying and now she was acting was simply because

723
00:34:13,040 --> 00:34:17,160
Speaker 2: she honestly believed that being married was an entirely different

724
00:34:17,200 --> 00:34:20,800
Speaker 2: life and that they mom and dad had romanticized marriage

725
00:34:20,840 --> 00:34:24,000
Speaker 2: to the point that she wasn't understanding real life. Basically,

726
00:34:24,080 --> 00:34:25,719
Speaker 2: he was kind of throwing his wife under the bus.

727
00:34:25,760 --> 00:34:28,319
Speaker 2: But again, this is not what I was expecting at all.

728
00:34:28,840 --> 00:34:31,359
Speaker 2: We shook hands and he said that no matter what

729
00:34:31,440 --> 00:34:34,760
Speaker 2: I decided, he still thought very highly of me. Honestly

730
00:34:34,760 --> 00:34:36,360
Speaker 2: made me feel really good for that moment.

731
00:34:36,480 --> 00:34:38,920
Speaker 1: Hey, you know what, Honestly, I'll take it. I feel

732
00:34:38,960 --> 00:34:41,279
Speaker 1: like this is as good of a conversation you're to

733
00:34:41,280 --> 00:34:42,719
Speaker 1: get from daddy as you can.

734
00:34:43,040 --> 00:34:45,680
Speaker 2: I then went inside, and my wife is curled up

735
00:34:45,680 --> 00:34:48,160
Speaker 2: at a ball on her Mom's lap, and you can

736
00:34:48,200 --> 00:34:51,520
Speaker 2: tell she's been crying the entire time I've been gone.

737
00:34:51,800 --> 00:34:54,040
Speaker 2: Mom gets up and comes and hugs me and tells

738
00:34:54,080 --> 00:34:56,960
Speaker 2: me she's sorry and that she loves me, and she's

739
00:34:57,040 --> 00:34:58,600
Speaker 2: praying that we can work this out.

740
00:34:59,480 --> 00:35:02,280
Speaker 1: But you, oh the rule, it doesn't count, doesn't count,

741
00:35:02,400 --> 00:35:04,160
Speaker 1: only counts if it's marriage.

742
00:35:04,520 --> 00:35:06,560
Speaker 2: My wife is laid out on the couch at this point,

743
00:35:06,760 --> 00:35:08,880
Speaker 2: her mom and dad leave and she sits there looking

744
00:35:08,920 --> 00:35:11,840
Speaker 2: at me and crying. Okay, this is where I'm gonna

745
00:35:11,840 --> 00:35:14,720
Speaker 2: piss off everybody and just tell you that I couldn't

746
00:35:14,719 --> 00:35:15,120
Speaker 2: take it.

747
00:35:15,520 --> 00:35:21,319
Speaker 1: No noodle spine, opie noodle spine.

748
00:35:22,440 --> 00:35:24,839
Speaker 2: I went to her and we hugged for a long time,

749
00:35:24,880 --> 00:35:29,719
Speaker 2: with her telling me over and over no, sorry, she won. Hey.

750
00:35:30,760 --> 00:35:32,440
Speaker 2: I know it was the weak thing to do, but

751
00:35:32,480 --> 00:35:34,560
Speaker 2: again I have to say in my defense that just

752
00:35:34,640 --> 00:35:37,640
Speaker 2: before this incident occurred, I loved her with all my

753
00:35:37,719 --> 00:35:40,120
Speaker 2: heart and would have done anything to not see her

754
00:35:40,160 --> 00:35:43,200
Speaker 2: in pain. Whatever she had done, I still didn't want

755
00:35:43,200 --> 00:35:44,000
Speaker 2: to see her like that.

756
00:35:45,400 --> 00:35:45,680
Speaker 1: Look.

757
00:35:45,800 --> 00:35:48,480
Speaker 2: It's very possible that she was putting on an Oscar

758
00:35:48,560 --> 00:35:52,239
Speaker 2: worthy acting job, but I honestly don't think so. She

759
00:35:52,360 --> 00:35:56,040
Speaker 2: really seemed broken at this point in time. After a while,

760
00:35:56,120 --> 00:35:58,680
Speaker 2: when she calmed down, I asked her what she wanted

761
00:35:58,719 --> 00:36:00,840
Speaker 2: me to come home and talk about it, and she

762
00:36:00,920 --> 00:36:03,080
Speaker 2: said she wanted to get everything out in the open,

763
00:36:03,200 --> 00:36:05,120
Speaker 2: so I didn't feel like I was being lied to

764
00:36:05,560 --> 00:36:06,400
Speaker 2: or manipulated.

765
00:36:06,480 --> 00:36:09,920
Speaker 1: Dude, we're gonna get the truth. I think it's gonna

766
00:36:09,960 --> 00:36:13,320
Speaker 1: be multiple people. Yeah, it's not just this one guy.

767
00:36:13,400 --> 00:36:17,080
Speaker 1: I think it's gonna be all right, wait, well, three people,

768
00:36:18,120 --> 00:36:18,960
Speaker 1: three people.

769
00:36:19,080 --> 00:36:21,560
Speaker 2: To be eat. I think if she is the mindset

770
00:36:21,600 --> 00:36:25,239
Speaker 2: that it doesn't count before marriage, then she's she's gallovanting

771
00:36:25,320 --> 00:36:27,600
Speaker 2: around now. She had two years of not marriage.

772
00:36:27,680 --> 00:36:28,960
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's a long time.

773
00:36:29,440 --> 00:36:31,640
Speaker 2: So she wanted me to ask her questions, and I

774
00:36:31,680 --> 00:36:34,239
Speaker 2: wish I had written down a list, but I came

775
00:36:34,320 --> 00:36:36,120
Speaker 2: up with a few off the top of my head.

776
00:36:36,480 --> 00:36:38,560
Speaker 2: She was brutally honest with me, and some of the

777
00:36:38,640 --> 00:36:42,680
Speaker 2: questions I asked, I probably shouldn't ask answer because now

778
00:36:42,719 --> 00:36:45,319
Speaker 2: the mental image is stuck in there, but honestly it

779
00:36:45,360 --> 00:36:49,160
Speaker 2: was there anyway. I just now have confirmation. First, I

780
00:36:49,320 --> 00:36:52,760
Speaker 2: asked for dates, or at the very least approximate dates.

781
00:36:53,239 --> 00:36:55,680
Speaker 2: I didn't tell her about the engagement concern I had

782
00:36:55,760 --> 00:36:58,440
Speaker 2: because I didn't want her to change stories, and she

783
00:36:58,560 --> 00:37:02,440
Speaker 2: remembered exactly when they Fortunately, this happened a little earlier

784
00:37:02,680 --> 00:37:05,600
Speaker 2: in our relationship than she told me initially, and so

785
00:37:05,640 --> 00:37:08,560
Speaker 2: we were not engaged when this happened. I can't tell

786
00:37:08,600 --> 00:37:11,000
Speaker 2: you what a relief that was, because I became physically

787
00:37:11,040 --> 00:37:13,120
Speaker 2: ill when I thought about that when someone said it

788
00:37:13,120 --> 00:37:14,080
Speaker 2: in my last post.

789
00:37:14,440 --> 00:37:15,680
Speaker 1: I guess a small win.

790
00:37:16,200 --> 00:37:21,760
Speaker 2: Sure. I second asked how many times she went overboard

791
00:37:21,800 --> 00:37:24,319
Speaker 2: with this? Because instead of just telling me how many

792
00:37:24,360 --> 00:37:28,080
Speaker 2: different dates, she decided to tell me how many times

793
00:37:28,160 --> 00:37:29,600
Speaker 2: there was penetration?

794
00:37:30,000 --> 00:37:32,239
Speaker 1: What one, two, three, four?

795
00:37:32,560 --> 00:37:37,279
Speaker 2: F yo? This part of the conversation did not help

796
00:37:37,320 --> 00:37:40,360
Speaker 2: me at any at all, and in fact almost broke

797
00:37:40,480 --> 00:37:43,480
Speaker 2: me down. In truth, it wasn't that often, and in fact,

798
00:37:43,520 --> 00:37:46,120
Speaker 2: there were really only three different days that happened on,

799
00:37:46,719 --> 00:37:51,400
Speaker 2: but there were several times during those three days. Nice.

800
00:37:51,920 --> 00:37:53,560
Speaker 2: Then came the hard stuff.

801
00:37:53,960 --> 00:37:57,400
Speaker 1: Oh how nice? That was the easy stuff?

802
00:37:57,920 --> 00:38:00,080
Speaker 2: Okay, again, I'm not the most manly of men, and

803
00:38:00,120 --> 00:38:02,080
Speaker 2: I'm ashamed to admit this, but I couldn't get this

804
00:38:02,160 --> 00:38:05,520
Speaker 2: out without starting to cry. I asked, why wasn't I

805
00:38:05,560 --> 00:38:08,600
Speaker 2: good enough? I am? Why did she not just leave me?

806
00:38:08,960 --> 00:38:11,719
Speaker 2: It was her just told me, because at this point

807
00:38:11,800 --> 00:38:14,680
Speaker 2: everything came rushing at me, Her telling me me having

808
00:38:14,719 --> 00:38:17,319
Speaker 2: to watch them laugh with each other, her now telling

809
00:38:17,400 --> 00:38:19,560
Speaker 2: me how many times they did it and where they

810
00:38:19,560 --> 00:38:21,800
Speaker 2: did it. She talked during this, but to this moment,

811
00:38:21,840 --> 00:38:25,400
Speaker 2: I have no idea what she said. I was too upset,

812
00:38:25,440 --> 00:38:27,439
Speaker 2: and honestly, nothing she was gonna say it was gonna

813
00:38:27,440 --> 00:38:31,480
Speaker 2: make any bit of difference anyway. But after I composed myself,

814
00:38:31,520 --> 00:38:35,279
Speaker 2: I simply told her that the betrayal was horrible, but

815
00:38:35,360 --> 00:38:37,840
Speaker 2: honestly her response to me when I found out was

816
00:38:38,120 --> 00:38:39,560
Speaker 2: just as bad, if not worse.

817
00:38:39,800 --> 00:38:44,279
Speaker 1: I think worse, much worse. Much, yeah, much worse. I'm

818
00:38:44,640 --> 00:38:45,600
Speaker 1: much worse. Uh.

819
00:38:45,960 --> 00:38:49,040
Speaker 2: She agreed with me, and she apologized for calling me immature.

820
00:38:49,120 --> 00:38:51,319
Speaker 2: She said that she honestly believed that it wouldn't matter

821
00:38:51,360 --> 00:38:54,480
Speaker 2: to me now because we were married. When she said this,

822
00:38:54,680 --> 00:38:58,239
Speaker 2: my blood started to boil again. I started to say

823
00:38:58,239 --> 00:39:00,480
Speaker 2: something about it, but she jumped in and said that

824
00:39:00,560 --> 00:39:03,480
Speaker 2: after talking with her parents, she now sees that this

825
00:39:03,680 --> 00:39:06,080
Speaker 2: was very wrong of her and that cheating is cheating,

826
00:39:06,120 --> 00:39:09,040
Speaker 2: but she still feels like that our happiness that we

827
00:39:09,080 --> 00:39:12,440
Speaker 2: have shared since being married should count for something. I

828
00:39:12,480 --> 00:39:14,640
Speaker 2: then replied that I kind of felt like that happiness

829
00:39:14,680 --> 00:39:15,320
Speaker 2: was built.

830
00:39:15,080 --> 00:39:18,480
Speaker 1: On a lie, because it was it was he thought

831
00:39:18,680 --> 00:39:22,440
Speaker 1: you were being all you know, truthful, and you weren't.

832
00:39:22,440 --> 00:39:25,080
Speaker 1: He thought you were being loyal and you'll weren't.

833
00:39:25,320 --> 00:39:28,040
Speaker 2: This led to another breakdown on her part and almost

834
00:39:28,040 --> 00:39:31,640
Speaker 2: another er visit, but between Adaman and having her breathe

835
00:39:31,680 --> 00:39:33,800
Speaker 2: into a paper sack, we got her calm down. Okay,

836
00:39:33,800 --> 00:39:36,719
Speaker 2: probably anxiety. Yeah. I let her sleep the rest of

837
00:39:36,719 --> 00:39:39,920
Speaker 2: the night, feeling like emotionally we were both tired. But

838
00:39:40,040 --> 00:39:43,480
Speaker 2: come Sunday we were talking again. By this time I

839
00:39:43,560 --> 00:39:45,960
Speaker 2: wasn't as sympathetic as I had been when we got

840
00:39:45,960 --> 00:39:47,759
Speaker 2: home from the art. I told her that I thought

841
00:39:47,800 --> 00:39:51,440
Speaker 2: her introducing him to me was crappy. Me having to

842
00:39:51,480 --> 00:39:54,480
Speaker 2: watch her dance with him was extra crappy. It was,

843
00:39:54,760 --> 00:39:56,480
Speaker 2: and the fact that she only told me because she

844
00:39:56,520 --> 00:39:58,800
Speaker 2: was going to get caught was an elite level of crappy.

845
00:39:59,360 --> 00:40:02,399
Speaker 1: Yeah. I don't know if I have any indication that

846
00:40:02,480 --> 00:40:06,399
Speaker 1: she has improved as a person. I don't think so

847
00:40:06,440 --> 00:40:07,600
Speaker 1: trying to get what she wants.

848
00:40:07,840 --> 00:40:10,279
Speaker 2: I don't think it's possible for her to improve as

849
00:40:10,320 --> 00:40:12,839
Speaker 2: a person. If two minutes ago she was like yeah,

850
00:40:12,920 --> 00:40:16,720
Speaker 2: with thet what which Then I demanded to know why

851
00:40:16,719 --> 00:40:18,759
Speaker 2: did she think I would find out? And how many

852
00:40:18,760 --> 00:40:22,719
Speaker 2: of the effing people at the wedding ooh besides me?

853
00:40:22,920 --> 00:40:26,239
Speaker 1: Well that's even worse, that's even more embarrassing. It's like

854
00:40:27,800 --> 00:40:31,279
Speaker 1: it's another thing to have everyone know that you're a little.

855
00:40:31,440 --> 00:40:36,280
Speaker 2: Five years five years later, Well, obviously the guy knew,

856
00:40:36,640 --> 00:40:38,759
Speaker 2: but then his best friend in the world also knew.

857
00:40:39,000 --> 00:40:40,880
Speaker 2: Did I mention that the effort is now my brother

858
00:40:40,920 --> 00:40:43,879
Speaker 2: in law? Which then led to her sister finding out,

859
00:40:43,920 --> 00:40:45,640
Speaker 2: and she was afraid her sister was going to be

860
00:40:45,680 --> 00:40:48,400
Speaker 2: the one to tell me, Oh, it's your sister. Seems

861
00:40:48,440 --> 00:40:52,360
Speaker 2: like a good person. I asked how often she sees

862
00:40:52,440 --> 00:40:54,120
Speaker 2: this guy, and she said that the wedding is the

863
00:40:54,120 --> 00:40:57,239
Speaker 2: first time she's seen him in three years. Then I

864
00:40:57,280 --> 00:41:00,720
Speaker 2: lost my crap and asked her if she him during

865
00:41:00,760 --> 00:41:03,880
Speaker 2: any of the lead up to the wedding. Oh, fair question.

866
00:41:04,719 --> 00:41:07,000
Speaker 2: She got all pissy about it, actingly she wouldn't if

867
00:41:07,000 --> 00:41:12,080
Speaker 2: anyone because she was married, right, marriage is the only

868
00:41:12,120 --> 00:41:16,880
Speaker 2: apparently that the and I just lost my crap and

869
00:41:16,960 --> 00:41:19,239
Speaker 2: had to leave for a while because once again I

870
00:41:19,320 --> 00:41:21,799
Speaker 2: felt like she was living on married planet or some

871
00:41:22,239 --> 00:41:24,879
Speaker 2: such crap, and the world there is a different place

872
00:41:24,960 --> 00:41:27,640
Speaker 2: than for the rest of us. I finally got cooled

873
00:41:27,640 --> 00:41:30,000
Speaker 2: off enough to come home and try and be civil

874
00:41:30,040 --> 00:41:32,640
Speaker 2: about things. She finally asked me what she could do

875
00:41:32,680 --> 00:41:34,600
Speaker 2: to help me get past all of this, which may

876
00:41:34,640 --> 00:41:37,399
Speaker 2: not sound like much, but it was the first time

877
00:41:37,480 --> 00:41:39,600
Speaker 2: she offered to help me really, so it was at

878
00:41:39,680 --> 00:41:42,400
Speaker 2: least a nice gesture. I told her I wasn't sure

879
00:41:42,440 --> 00:41:44,680
Speaker 2: what she could do or if there was anything either

880
00:41:44,719 --> 00:41:47,680
Speaker 2: of us could do, and that I may never get

881
00:41:47,680 --> 00:41:52,040
Speaker 2: over this. Wow, at least no peace is done. Is

882
00:41:52,040 --> 00:41:53,839
Speaker 2: a little bit more, but it seems like a piece

883
00:41:54,000 --> 00:41:55,879
Speaker 2: like I'm not not I don't know.

884
00:41:56,040 --> 00:41:59,640
Speaker 1: I thought the last person was. They just crawled.

885
00:42:02,080 --> 00:42:04,239
Speaker 2: Out, They crawled back into the hole, and then they

886
00:42:04,280 --> 00:42:07,719
Speaker 2: crawled out of the hole. So hopefully OP stays out of.

887
00:42:07,680 --> 00:42:10,160
Speaker 1: That hole in more ways than one.

888
00:42:10,520 --> 00:42:10,719
Speaker 2: Ah.

889
00:42:11,400 --> 00:42:16,120
Speaker 1: No, yes, yes, yes, I give us the finish of

890
00:42:16,120 --> 00:42:16,760
Speaker 1: that story.

891
00:42:17,200 --> 00:42:20,040
Speaker 2: She said that she wanted to help because she didn't

892
00:42:20,040 --> 00:42:22,120
Speaker 2: want to see me in pain, and that over the years,

893
00:42:22,160 --> 00:42:24,080
Speaker 2: she hopes I'll be able to judge her based on

894
00:42:24,120 --> 00:42:27,440
Speaker 2: who she is now, the same person she would do anything.

895
00:42:27,480 --> 00:42:29,880
Speaker 2: I wanted to work this out. She also wanted to

896
00:42:29,920 --> 00:42:31,440
Speaker 2: be sure that I knew that she has been one

897
00:42:31,480 --> 00:42:34,799
Speaker 2: hundred percent faithful since we've been married and would never

898
00:42:34,920 --> 00:42:38,319
Speaker 2: cheat on her vows. I sarcastically thanked her, which I

899
00:42:38,360 --> 00:42:41,440
Speaker 2: admit wasn't the most mature thing to do. Give yourself

900
00:42:41,440 --> 00:42:42,080
Speaker 2: a break.

901
00:42:41,840 --> 00:42:46,520
Speaker 1: Man, dude, Yeah, I feel like you need some space. Also,

902
00:42:46,600 --> 00:42:50,439
Speaker 1: stop asking all these masochistic questions. Stop you just gotta

903
00:42:50,480 --> 00:42:51,160
Speaker 1: hurt yourself.

904
00:42:51,600 --> 00:42:54,680
Speaker 2: I then asked for a moratorium from further talks till

905
00:42:54,719 --> 00:42:58,360
Speaker 2: at least Wednesday. I have two projects I have to

906
00:42:58,360 --> 00:43:01,000
Speaker 2: get done, and honestly, I'm just EXAs exhausted and no,

907
00:43:01,280 --> 00:43:03,120
Speaker 2: I have no having clue what I want to do.

908
00:43:03,800 --> 00:43:06,239
Speaker 2: I shift between periods of red on anger where I

909
00:43:06,280 --> 00:43:08,839
Speaker 2: want to punt her out, and the periods of deep

910
00:43:08,880 --> 00:43:11,640
Speaker 2: emotional turmoil where I want to just forget this and

911
00:43:11,719 --> 00:43:14,239
Speaker 2: move forward with her. Yes, I know this is not

912
00:43:14,280 --> 00:43:16,960
Speaker 2: what anyone wanted to hear, and no, I'm not proud

913
00:43:16,960 --> 00:43:19,239
Speaker 2: to type it, but it is what it is at

914
00:43:19,239 --> 00:43:21,280
Speaker 2: the moment, and that's the end of that story.

915
00:43:21,719 --> 00:43:27,480
Speaker 1: Disgusting, disgusted, Ugh John here og host. We're gonna get

916
00:43:27,480 --> 00:43:29,279
Speaker 1: back to these stories, but a quick three minute break

917
00:43:29,320 --> 00:43:30,680
Speaker 1: from as from our sponsors.

918
00:43:30,960 --> 00:43:35,719
Speaker 2: I accidentally drop my boyfriend's senior dog. Now things are awkward.

919
00:43:36,040 --> 00:43:38,759
Speaker 4: Yeah, I'd feel pretty awkward if I just just I'm

920
00:43:38,840 --> 00:43:41,359
Speaker 4: alive to sen your dog thing is dead?

921
00:43:42,320 --> 00:43:45,720
Speaker 2: I probably is. I twenty one female, have been seeing

922
00:43:45,719 --> 00:43:50,880
Speaker 2: my boyfriend, twenty five male, for a little over two months.

923
00:43:51,320 --> 00:43:53,600
Speaker 2: In our culture, we don't move out from our parents'

924
00:43:53,600 --> 00:43:56,560
Speaker 2: house until we get married. It's hard to hang out

925
00:43:56,600 --> 00:43:59,120
Speaker 2: at each other's houses as a result, so we don't

926
00:43:59,160 --> 00:44:02,400
Speaker 2: usually do that. By the way, this comes from Puzzleheaded

927
00:44:02,480 --> 00:44:05,440
Speaker 2: Egg ninety two forty nine and if you want to

928
00:44:05,440 --> 00:44:07,640
Speaker 2: smit your own stories, go to the r slash. Okay,

929
00:44:07,640 --> 00:44:12,160
Speaker 2: storytime suppared it. So his parents are on vacation and

930
00:44:12,239 --> 00:44:14,840
Speaker 2: he invited me over after work. I came over and

931
00:44:15,000 --> 00:44:18,719
Speaker 2: was greeted by his cute little dogs, Scottie. I myself

932
00:44:19,000 --> 00:44:21,480
Speaker 2: have never had a dog in my life, and I

933
00:44:22,160 --> 00:44:25,320
Speaker 2: have a few family members who have dogs, but mostly

934
00:44:25,360 --> 00:44:28,760
Speaker 2: big dogs. Well, Scotty is a small dog. I do, however,

935
00:44:28,920 --> 00:44:31,719
Speaker 2: have two cats, and that's really my only experience with

936
00:44:31,800 --> 00:44:35,040
Speaker 2: having pets. Needless to say, I don't have much experience

937
00:44:35,080 --> 00:44:39,280
Speaker 2: with dogs, and more specifically small dogs. This is all relevant.

938
00:44:39,320 --> 00:44:43,200
Speaker 2: I swear I walked in and Scotty started barking, and

939
00:44:43,280 --> 00:44:45,680
Speaker 2: my boyfriend said to ignore it, but he only barked

940
00:44:45,680 --> 00:44:48,759
Speaker 2: twice and immediately came over to me and started sniffing me.

941
00:44:49,440 --> 00:44:51,359
Speaker 2: I was petting him, and he was resting his hat

942
00:44:51,400 --> 00:44:53,839
Speaker 2: on my leg and seemed to be really enjoying it.

943
00:44:54,320 --> 00:44:57,480
Speaker 2: My boyfriend was honestly kind of shocked and expected Scotty

944
00:44:57,560 --> 00:44:59,759
Speaker 2: to bark more and didn't expect him to be so

945
00:45:00,040 --> 00:45:04,040
Speaker 2: welcoming anyway. I asked my boyfriend if I could hold

946
00:45:04,080 --> 00:45:06,200
Speaker 2: Scottie because I didn't want to just pick him up

947
00:45:06,239 --> 00:45:09,239
Speaker 2: if he didn't like being held. My boyfriend said that

948
00:45:09,280 --> 00:45:11,920
Speaker 2: he probably won't let me, so I was like, whol,

949
00:45:12,719 --> 00:45:14,600
Speaker 2: But then he picked him up and put him in

950
00:45:14,640 --> 00:45:18,719
Speaker 2: my arms. Oh interesting. He was like, he probably won't

951
00:45:18,760 --> 00:45:21,440
Speaker 2: like it here. Yeah, what he's just trying to set

952
00:45:21,480 --> 00:45:24,880
Speaker 2: you up to fail, man, it really is. He's like,

953
00:45:24,920 --> 00:45:28,759
Speaker 2: I don't want this dog anymore. I told him right

954
00:45:28,800 --> 00:45:31,400
Speaker 2: away it's okay, and to take him back if he

955
00:45:31,440 --> 00:45:34,200
Speaker 2: doesn't like it, but my boyfriend kind of insisted and

956
00:45:34,320 --> 00:45:37,680
Speaker 2: was like, no, he likes you fine, he's trying to

957
00:45:37,719 --> 00:45:40,720
Speaker 2: like frame. OK. He's like this dog is so old.

958
00:45:41,880 --> 00:45:44,640
Speaker 2: Take it. He loves being Hell.

959
00:45:44,640 --> 00:45:46,480
Speaker 4: You want to hold him?

960
00:45:47,000 --> 00:45:51,200
Speaker 2: Scout Scottie and the dog's like it's like one of

961
00:45:51,200 --> 00:45:55,520
Speaker 2: those little white, crusty dogs. I was like, yeah, exactly. Yeah.

962
00:45:55,600 --> 00:45:59,440
Speaker 2: After like five seconds, Scotty started squirming in my arms.

963
00:46:00,239 --> 00:46:03,920
Speaker 2: I see you. Uh Now, when my cats do this,

964
00:46:04,520 --> 00:46:10,560
Speaker 2: it means they want to be put down immediately. Makes sense. Again,

965
00:46:11,840 --> 00:46:15,239
Speaker 2: I don't have much experience with small dogs, like I

966
00:46:15,400 --> 00:46:20,200
Speaker 2: mentioned before, and just assumed to do the same thing

967
00:46:20,320 --> 00:46:23,560
Speaker 2: I always do with my cats. When they start doing that,

968
00:46:25,440 --> 00:46:28,960
Speaker 2: I simply moved my hand from underneath them and let

969
00:46:29,040 --> 00:46:33,160
Speaker 2: them jump out of my arms. Yeah. Yeah, different, It's

970
00:46:33,280 --> 00:46:38,080
Speaker 2: not right. I did this exact same thing with Scottie,

971
00:46:38,320 --> 00:46:42,400
Speaker 2: and unfortunately he fell out his side, I believe, and

972
00:46:42,480 --> 00:46:45,840
Speaker 2: immediately started crying or making some noise that was obviously

973
00:46:45,880 --> 00:46:48,719
Speaker 2: expressing discomfort. Did you break this dog's leg?

974
00:46:49,200 --> 00:46:49,359
Speaker 1: Yeah?

975
00:46:49,400 --> 00:46:52,239
Speaker 2: How long did the crying go on for? I just

976
00:46:52,400 --> 00:46:55,440
Speaker 2: I'm trying to imagine you can I have an animal

977
00:46:55,480 --> 00:46:58,320
Speaker 2: like a stuffed animal? Please? Here you go what I'm imagining.

978
00:46:58,560 --> 00:47:01,919
Speaker 2: So you're the boyfriend, Okay, hand this to me. H yeah,

979
00:47:01,960 --> 00:47:04,320
Speaker 2: you probably won't like. Can I hold it being held?

980
00:47:04,760 --> 00:47:04,840
Speaker 1: Oh?

981
00:47:04,880 --> 00:47:06,960
Speaker 2: Wait, you go first? Can I can I hold him? Uh,

982
00:47:07,840 --> 00:47:15,040
Speaker 2: he probably won't like it, but you go, okay. And

983
00:47:15,160 --> 00:47:19,600
Speaker 2: then and then he does this on the ground. Yeah,

984
00:47:19,840 --> 00:47:25,239
Speaker 2: exactly that, he said. I immediately started apologizing because it

985
00:47:25,280 --> 00:47:29,240
Speaker 2: would never ever be my intention to hurt anyone, especially

986
00:47:29,280 --> 00:47:33,200
Speaker 2: not my boyfriend's dog. I honestly started panicking because I'm

987
00:47:33,320 --> 00:47:35,879
Speaker 2: tall and that was a pretty big fall for such

988
00:47:35,880 --> 00:47:40,040
Speaker 2: a small little dog. My boyfriend is in veterinarian school

989
00:47:40,120 --> 00:47:43,359
Speaker 2: and immediately own, well, you know what, that's good? Yea,

990
00:47:45,239 --> 00:47:49,160
Speaker 2: that's are so expensive and immediately looked worried, which made

991
00:47:49,239 --> 00:47:51,680
Speaker 2: me start to freak out and ask him if he

992
00:47:51,800 --> 00:47:56,840
Speaker 2: was okay. My boyfriend was just like, give me a minute, space,

993
00:47:56,920 --> 00:48:04,520
Speaker 2: Giver space, people. I literally had no idea what to do,

994
00:48:04,840 --> 00:48:08,040
Speaker 2: say anything. I felt like I had done enough at

995
00:48:08,040 --> 00:48:11,080
Speaker 2: that point and just wanted to let him do his thing.

996
00:48:11,800 --> 00:48:14,360
Speaker 2: But I just felt so awful that every few minutes

997
00:48:14,400 --> 00:48:17,839
Speaker 2: I just kept apologizing. After twenty minutes, my boyfriend said

998
00:48:17,840 --> 00:48:19,560
Speaker 2: that he was probably gonna need to spend the rest

999
00:48:19,600 --> 00:48:21,759
Speaker 2: of the night looking after him to make sure he

1000
00:48:21,800 --> 00:48:25,400
Speaker 2: was okay. So then I said I completely understand and

1001
00:48:25,520 --> 00:48:27,600
Speaker 2: got my stuff and started to leave. He said I

1002
00:48:27,600 --> 00:48:29,680
Speaker 2: could stay a little longer if I wanted to. But

1003
00:48:29,800 --> 00:48:33,360
Speaker 2: I said no, girl, and that I just wanted to

1004
00:48:33,400 --> 00:48:36,360
Speaker 2: go home and leave him alone. I understand that she

1005
00:48:36,440 --> 00:48:39,560
Speaker 2: probably feels like super guilty. Oh yeah, but it probably

1006
00:48:39,600 --> 00:48:42,840
Speaker 2: would have looked better if you stay like he Probably

1007
00:48:43,280 --> 00:48:45,960
Speaker 2: it probably wouldn't have been awkward in the long run

1008
00:48:46,280 --> 00:48:48,040
Speaker 2: if you had been like, oh my god, I'm literally

1009
00:48:48,080 --> 00:48:51,680
Speaker 2: so sorry and like him, help him out. Yeah, yeah,

1010
00:48:51,800 --> 00:48:53,680
Speaker 2: I could understand one to get out of there.

1011
00:48:53,920 --> 00:48:58,480
Speaker 4: Yeah, but just like I, okay else any other dogs.

1012
00:48:58,840 --> 00:49:02,319
Speaker 2: I literally don't know what to do and cried the

1013
00:49:02,440 --> 00:49:05,799
Speaker 2: whole way home and still am. Right now, what can

1014
00:49:05,840 --> 00:49:07,759
Speaker 2: I even do to make this right? I can't take

1015
00:49:07,800 --> 00:49:09,680
Speaker 2: back what I did, which is what I wish I could.

1016
00:49:10,480 --> 00:49:13,239
Speaker 2: I would have never ever done that on purpose, and

1017
00:49:13,440 --> 00:49:15,560
Speaker 2: genuinely believe that he would just jump out of my

1018
00:49:15,640 --> 00:49:18,200
Speaker 2: arms like my cats do. I never thought he would

1019
00:49:18,239 --> 00:49:19,040
Speaker 2: just fall.

1020
00:49:21,160 --> 00:49:27,120
Speaker 3: Literally imagine this dog just being like h that was

1021
00:49:27,200 --> 00:49:36,680
Speaker 3: like perfect, gosh, I'm assuming this dog is fine, which

1022
00:49:36,719 --> 00:49:39,000
Speaker 3: is why I'm making more jokes about it, and she's

1023
00:49:39,200 --> 00:49:44,480
Speaker 3: just so concerned. Yeah, you know, like what if Scotty

1024
00:49:44,560 --> 00:49:47,720
Speaker 3: is a concussion or a broken leg or something worse

1025
00:49:47,840 --> 00:49:49,480
Speaker 3: and he's permanently injured because of me.

1026
00:49:49,880 --> 00:49:51,600
Speaker 5: Do dogs can't get concussions?

1027
00:49:52,040 --> 00:49:53,080
Speaker 2: I don't know if that's true.

1028
00:49:53,640 --> 00:49:56,600
Speaker 5: Concussions are a new thing for humans. It came out

1029
00:49:56,600 --> 00:49:57,439
Speaker 5: like fifty years ago.

1030
00:49:57,880 --> 00:50:00,759
Speaker 2: It came out. It's a new tren. We unlocked it.

1031
00:50:00,760 --> 00:50:01,520
Speaker 2: It's all theresions.

1032
00:50:01,640 --> 00:50:03,360
Speaker 5: Yeah, everyone gets good caustion nowadays.

1033
00:50:03,400 --> 00:50:05,839
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's a It's an evolutionary thing. I literally don't

1034
00:50:05,880 --> 00:50:07,960
Speaker 2: know if I could forgive myself. I just feel like

1035
00:50:08,000 --> 00:50:10,239
Speaker 2: a horrible person and I don't know what to even

1036
00:50:10,320 --> 00:50:12,160
Speaker 2: say to my boyfriend at this point, so I'm giving

1037
00:50:12,239 --> 00:50:14,920
Speaker 2: him space. Someone please give me advice on what to do.

1038
00:50:15,480 --> 00:50:17,880
Speaker 2: How can I make this better? Is that even possible?

1039
00:50:17,920 --> 00:50:20,640
Speaker 2: At this point, I'm genuinely, so so so remorseful and

1040
00:50:20,680 --> 00:50:23,520
Speaker 2: feel like such an idiot for doing that. I just

1041
00:50:23,600 --> 00:50:26,080
Speaker 2: wish I would have gently let him down instead of

1042
00:50:26,160 --> 00:50:29,160
Speaker 2: letting him jump. And I literally feel so freakin' awful.

1043
00:50:29,200 --> 00:50:32,359
Speaker 2: I can't stop thinking about it. Good girl, is my

1044
00:50:32,360 --> 00:50:34,520
Speaker 2: boyfriend gonna hate me now and break up with me?

1045
00:50:34,680 --> 00:50:36,400
Speaker 2: There's just so much running through my brain and I

1046
00:50:36,440 --> 00:50:38,799
Speaker 2: don't know who else to turn to right now. Any

1047
00:50:38,840 --> 00:50:43,680
Speaker 2: advice is greatly appreciated. Man, there are reason update. Oh really,

1048
00:50:44,719 --> 00:50:46,600
Speaker 2: I know exactly what you need to do, but do

1049
00:50:46,680 --> 00:50:49,120
Speaker 2: you know, Uh, well, I.

1050
00:50:49,000 --> 00:50:50,560
Speaker 4: Don't know what to do, but I just don't think

1051
00:50:50,560 --> 00:50:52,319
Speaker 4: that the boyfriend's gonna break up over this.

1052
00:50:52,400 --> 00:50:56,400
Speaker 2: Girl unless you unless his dog is dead, You're fine.

1053
00:50:57,160 --> 00:51:01,600
Speaker 2: You text him, you say, hey, sorry I had to leave.

1054
00:51:02,000 --> 00:51:06,640
Speaker 2: I felt so bad, truly. Yeah, you know, I've only

1055
00:51:06,680 --> 00:51:09,480
Speaker 2: had cats around. I don't know why I thought that

1056
00:51:09,480 --> 00:51:13,920
Speaker 2: that would work with your dog. Sorry about that. Yeah,

1057
00:51:13,960 --> 00:51:15,920
Speaker 2: how's your dog feeling? How's Scotti feeling?

1058
00:51:16,239 --> 00:51:16,439
Speaker 3: Yeah?

1059
00:51:16,840 --> 00:51:18,440
Speaker 2: Let me know if I need to help out with

1060
00:51:18,480 --> 00:51:23,399
Speaker 2: any vet bills, if anything's if he's injured, truly super sorry, Yeah,

1061
00:51:24,080 --> 00:51:26,439
Speaker 2: me come over with some trees. Yeah yeah, the tree?

1062
00:51:26,480 --> 00:51:30,239
Speaker 2: You say, like, yeah, literally repeat that. Fix it up

1063
00:51:30,239 --> 00:51:34,320
Speaker 2: a little bit. You're fine. Yeah, there is an update, folks,

1064
00:51:34,880 --> 00:51:38,520
Speaker 2: let's get into it. My boyfriend twenty five male texted

1065
00:51:38,560 --> 00:51:41,520
Speaker 2: me twenty one female the night this all happened, saying

1066
00:51:41,520 --> 00:51:44,520
Speaker 2: that he understands and that accident's happen and we could

1067
00:51:44,520 --> 00:51:47,880
Speaker 2: still hang out the next day. So obviously I assumed

1068
00:51:47,920 --> 00:51:49,719
Speaker 2: that things were okay and I was looking forward to

1069
00:51:49,719 --> 00:51:52,360
Speaker 2: see him. The next day came around, and the first

1070
00:51:52,360 --> 00:51:54,080
Speaker 2: thing I did when I woke up, was text him

1071
00:51:54,120 --> 00:51:56,560
Speaker 2: and ask about how little Scotty was doing. He was

1072
00:51:56,560 --> 00:51:59,080
Speaker 2: at work, so it took him a little while to respond,

1073
00:51:59,120 --> 00:52:02,959
Speaker 2: which is completely understandable. He said better, still in some pain.

1074
00:52:03,440 --> 00:52:05,560
Speaker 2: I apologized again and said that I was glad he

1075
00:52:05,640 --> 00:52:07,880
Speaker 2: was doing better. A few hours later, I was at

1076
00:52:07,920 --> 00:52:10,520
Speaker 2: the grocery store getting a few things and decided to

1077
00:52:10,560 --> 00:52:13,000
Speaker 2: get Scotti a toy because I had felt bad about

1078
00:52:13,000 --> 00:52:16,000
Speaker 2: the situation. I texted him again and said that I

1079
00:52:16,040 --> 00:52:18,440
Speaker 2: bought Scotty a toy and couldn't wait to give it him.

1080
00:52:18,600 --> 00:52:20,839
Speaker 2: He has still not replied to my previous text when

1081
00:52:20,880 --> 00:52:23,560
Speaker 2: I apologized again, but again he was at work, so

1082
00:52:23,640 --> 00:52:26,120
Speaker 2: no biggie. I assume when he got out he would

1083
00:52:26,160 --> 00:52:28,959
Speaker 2: apply to both of my texts. About three hours later,

1084
00:52:29,040 --> 00:52:31,319
Speaker 2: he texted me saying, I mean, there's not much else

1085
00:52:31,360 --> 00:52:36,920
Speaker 2: to say. Okay, Well now, oh, no acknowledgment of the

1086
00:52:36,920 --> 00:52:39,839
Speaker 2: text I sent him about the toy, No confirming if

1087
00:52:39,840 --> 00:52:42,279
Speaker 2: we were still gonna hang out. He's the one who

1088
00:52:42,280 --> 00:52:46,920
Speaker 2: said we would hang out the night before. Literally nothing. Obviously.

1089
00:52:47,000 --> 00:52:49,120
Speaker 2: I was a little baffled because I couldn't believe that

1090
00:52:49,120 --> 00:52:51,239
Speaker 2: that's all he had to say. I thought he'd at

1091
00:52:51,280 --> 00:52:53,799
Speaker 2: least even acknowledge the text about the toy, like, I

1092
00:52:53,800 --> 00:52:56,719
Speaker 2: don't know, at least something a little more than I mean,

1093
00:52:56,800 --> 00:52:59,440
Speaker 2: there's not much else to say. At this point, I

1094
00:52:59,480 --> 00:53:03,640
Speaker 2: really didn't know what else to do. I apologized fusely,

1095
00:53:03,680 --> 00:53:06,279
Speaker 2: as many times as I could, offer to pay for

1096
00:53:06,360 --> 00:53:09,560
Speaker 2: VAT bills at if necessary. There you go, bottom a toy.

1097
00:53:09,880 --> 00:53:12,600
Speaker 2: Checked up on him. Literally everything that I thought would

1098
00:53:12,640 --> 00:53:15,239
Speaker 2: help the situation. I did, and it seemed like he

1099
00:53:15,280 --> 00:53:17,319
Speaker 2: was more mad at me than even right after it

1100
00:53:17,360 --> 00:53:21,200
Speaker 2: initially happened. Interesting, I've you did everything you could at

1101
00:53:21,200 --> 00:53:23,640
Speaker 2: that point, and if he's still like I'm gonna break

1102
00:53:23,719 --> 00:53:28,759
Speaker 2: up with her over this, well silly? Yeah, I also too.

1103
00:53:28,800 --> 00:53:30,359
Speaker 4: I wonder if it's the kind of thing where it's

1104
00:53:30,400 --> 00:53:32,560
Speaker 4: like if since you keep bringing it up, he's like,

1105
00:53:32,600 --> 00:53:35,280
Speaker 4: you know what, yeah I am, you should be sorry

1106
00:53:35,520 --> 00:53:40,120
Speaker 4: about this sometimes like yeah that the more it happens,

1107
00:53:40,400 --> 00:53:43,320
Speaker 4: the more they're like, okay, like maybe I should actually

1108
00:53:43,400 --> 00:53:46,320
Speaker 4: be really upset about this, and then they've become that yeah.

1109
00:53:46,320 --> 00:53:50,520
Speaker 4: So I wonder if if her like because yeah, I mean,

1110
00:53:50,560 --> 00:53:53,080
Speaker 4: at a certain point, there isn't much else you could say.

1111
00:53:53,080 --> 00:53:54,399
Speaker 2: It's just like, yeah, it's just some pain.

1112
00:53:54,840 --> 00:53:56,760
Speaker 4: Then you're just like I'm so sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry,

1113
00:53:57,120 --> 00:54:00,000
Speaker 4: And then if you're expecting something in return, it's like, yeah,

1114
00:54:00,160 --> 00:54:02,719
Speaker 4: like what else, no need to say to that anymore.

1115
00:54:02,960 --> 00:54:06,160
Speaker 2: Yeah, at this point I just texted him back, Okay,

1116
00:54:06,280 --> 00:54:08,560
Speaker 2: I'm sorry again and wish this never happened. I'm just

1117
00:54:08,560 --> 00:54:11,040
Speaker 2: giving you space at this point because I don't know

1118
00:54:11,080 --> 00:54:13,200
Speaker 2: what else to do. Just reach out to me if

1119
00:54:13,239 --> 00:54:14,800
Speaker 2: and when you want to talk to me again. He

1120
00:54:14,920 --> 00:54:17,640
Speaker 2: texted me thank you, and that was literally it. This

1121
00:54:17,800 --> 00:54:20,439
Speaker 2: was two days ago at four thirty pm. He didn't

1122
00:54:20,440 --> 00:54:22,960
Speaker 2: talk to me all day yesterday and hasn't spoken to

1123
00:54:23,000 --> 00:54:27,160
Speaker 2: me today either. Literally, not one word. Girl. There's a

1124
00:54:27,200 --> 00:54:28,640
Speaker 2: little bit left to this story.

1125
00:54:28,800 --> 00:54:30,600
Speaker 5: I think it's I think they're not going to get

1126
00:54:30,640 --> 00:54:31,080
Speaker 5: back together.

1127
00:54:31,480 --> 00:54:33,520
Speaker 2: Yeah, it seems like he's not taking it well.

1128
00:54:33,800 --> 00:54:37,640
Speaker 4: Yeah, Well, with how often she is replying, how often

1129
00:54:37,719 --> 00:54:40,600
Speaker 4: she like feels like she needs to like apologize, I

1130
00:54:40,640 --> 00:54:43,440
Speaker 4: think she's clearly not getting much back.

1131
00:54:43,520 --> 00:54:46,040
Speaker 2: I guess I feel like she was almost in the

1132
00:54:46,080 --> 00:54:48,760
Speaker 2: clear and then maybe went a little bit too ham

1133
00:54:49,239 --> 00:54:51,279
Speaker 2: and now it was no longer in the clear. Now

1134
00:54:51,320 --> 00:54:54,080
Speaker 2: it's kind of like, ah, yeah, and that sucks. Yeah,

1135
00:54:54,120 --> 00:54:56,920
Speaker 2: it does suck. Maybe I'm being rude at this point,

1136
00:54:57,120 --> 00:54:59,479
Speaker 2: But does anyone else think that he's taking this too far?

1137
00:55:00,200 --> 00:55:02,360
Speaker 2: Or just me? I don't know if I'm being cruel,

1138
00:55:02,440 --> 00:55:05,640
Speaker 2: So please let me know if I am. But not

1139
00:55:05,840 --> 00:55:08,759
Speaker 2: talking to me for almost two days over something that

1140
00:55:08,880 --> 00:55:13,480
Speaker 2: was genuinely an accident and then I have done everything

1141
00:55:13,520 --> 00:55:15,440
Speaker 2: in my power to make up for it seems a

1142
00:55:15,480 --> 00:55:20,800
Speaker 2: little harsh. Yeah, is this deserved and I'm just being cruel?

1143
00:55:21,360 --> 00:55:24,040
Speaker 2: Or is he taking it too far? Please be honest

1144
00:55:24,080 --> 00:55:26,520
Speaker 2: with me, because I genuinely don't know how to feel

1145
00:55:27,080 --> 00:55:30,120
Speaker 2: or what to do. I'm the kind of person who

1146
00:55:30,120 --> 00:55:32,320
Speaker 2: believes if you can go an entire day without talking

1147
00:55:32,320 --> 00:55:34,480
Speaker 2: to me, then you clearly do not like me at

1148
00:55:34,480 --> 00:55:36,520
Speaker 2: this point. That's the message I'm receiving. Do you all

1149
00:55:36,560 --> 00:55:40,920
Speaker 2: agree or think that this is deserved? I don't know

1150
00:55:41,000 --> 00:55:44,560
Speaker 2: if all. I don't think it's deserved. I do think

1151
00:55:44,600 --> 00:55:47,560
Speaker 2: that he's maybe over this relationship.

1152
00:55:48,239 --> 00:55:50,560
Speaker 4: Yeah, I think it's just kind of like, ah, you know,

1153
00:55:50,600 --> 00:55:53,759
Speaker 4: when you're like just started dating someone, you don't even

1154
00:55:53,880 --> 00:55:56,080
Speaker 4: love him yet, and then they drop your dogs.

1155
00:55:57,080 --> 00:55:59,880
Speaker 2: It's just kind of like ruins the lie, just ruin

1156
00:56:00,200 --> 00:56:02,719
Speaker 2: the VI. I don't know. I just think that, Yeah,

1157
00:56:02,719 --> 00:56:04,879
Speaker 2: the vibe was just off. I think I think his

1158
00:56:05,239 --> 00:56:07,640
Speaker 2: was off from like not talking to her. Forced you

1159
00:56:07,680 --> 00:56:11,400
Speaker 2: to hold that dog? Yeah, yeah, don't forget force that

1160
00:56:11,520 --> 00:56:14,480
Speaker 2: dog on him? This your honor?

1161
00:56:14,719 --> 00:56:16,080
Speaker 5: Yeah, against your will?

1162
00:56:16,200 --> 00:56:18,680
Speaker 2: And yeah that dog did not want to Yeah, like,

1163
00:56:19,280 --> 00:56:20,640
Speaker 2: sorry you dropped him.

1164
00:56:20,680 --> 00:56:23,759
Speaker 4: But who was the one that was making him be

1165
00:56:23,920 --> 00:56:25,719
Speaker 4: held when he knew that he didn't even like to

1166
00:56:25,760 --> 00:56:26,160
Speaker 4: be held?

1167
00:56:26,320 --> 00:56:28,960
Speaker 2: Yeah? Yeah, so I think he's in the wrong too.

1168
00:56:30,440 --> 00:56:31,400
Speaker 2: I rest my case.

1169
00:56:32,719 --> 00:56:36,239
Speaker 4: I rest my case, and that dog my boyfriend got

1170
00:56:36,239 --> 00:56:39,040
Speaker 4: another girl pregnant after he asked for a break.

1171
00:56:40,000 --> 00:56:41,320
Speaker 2: That's not a break.

1172
00:56:41,920 --> 00:56:44,080
Speaker 4: I met my ex boyfriend about two years ago at

1173
00:56:44,080 --> 00:56:46,040
Speaker 4: a time in my life that I wasn't expecting nor

1174
00:56:46,080 --> 00:56:46,760
Speaker 4: seeking out.

1175
00:56:46,600 --> 00:56:47,759
Speaker 2: A serious relationship.

1176
00:56:48,000 --> 00:56:51,080
Speaker 4: I had ended a six year relationship about eight months beforehand,

1177
00:56:51,080 --> 00:56:54,000
Speaker 4: and I was perfectly content having fun at being single

1178
00:56:54,000 --> 00:56:56,320
Speaker 4: for a while. But alas he came out of nowhere

1179
00:56:56,360 --> 00:56:59,799
Speaker 4: and completely stole my heart. By the way, this comes

1180
00:56:59,800 --> 00:57:02,120
Speaker 4: from Painted Warrior, and if you want to submit your

1181
00:57:02,120 --> 00:57:04,680
Speaker 4: own stories, go to the r Social Okay Storytime sepreddit.

1182
00:57:04,920 --> 00:57:08,319
Speaker 4: So we fell in love almost immediately, and from the

1183
00:57:08,320 --> 00:57:10,759
Speaker 4: first day we spent together we were inseparable, and our

1184
00:57:10,760 --> 00:57:14,200
Speaker 4: friends called us Bonnie and Clyde. We ate together, slept together,

1185
00:57:14,360 --> 00:57:16,160
Speaker 4: worked out together everything.

1186
00:57:16,400 --> 00:57:18,440
Speaker 2: We made plans. We wanted to finish.

1187
00:57:18,200 --> 00:57:21,800
Speaker 4: School and get married, have kids, the whole thing. Our

1188
00:57:21,840 --> 00:57:24,560
Speaker 4: relationship was passionate, to say the least, but towards the

1189
00:57:24,720 --> 00:57:28,960
Speaker 4: end it got hard. He seemed distant and frustrated all

1190
00:57:29,000 --> 00:57:31,920
Speaker 4: the time. He'd break plans at the last minute to

1191
00:57:31,960 --> 00:57:35,320
Speaker 4: go out with his friends instead. I sat him down

1192
00:57:35,320 --> 00:57:37,320
Speaker 4: about two weeks before he left me and asked him

1193
00:57:37,360 --> 00:57:39,680
Speaker 4: to come clean about what was going on. He told

1194
00:57:39,680 --> 00:57:42,960
Speaker 4: me that he was feeling lost and depressed, worried about school,

1195
00:57:43,200 --> 00:57:46,280
Speaker 4: sick of his family, and terrified of failing, and it

1196
00:57:46,320 --> 00:57:49,760
Speaker 4: was distracting him from our relationship and even making him

1197
00:57:49,800 --> 00:57:52,640
Speaker 4: resent me because I was not facing those issues. It's like,

1198
00:57:52,680 --> 00:57:56,120
Speaker 4: you're doing too well, too well, dude, it's bothering me.

1199
00:57:56,560 --> 00:57:58,480
Speaker 4: I genuinely believe that he was depressed.

1200
00:57:58,680 --> 00:57:59,720
Speaker 2: He had lost weight, was.

1201
00:57:59,720 --> 00:58:02,919
Speaker 4: A work out regularly, and was constantly complaining of getting

1202
00:58:03,000 --> 00:58:06,120
Speaker 4: no sleep. The way that he was handling his own

1203
00:58:06,160 --> 00:58:08,760
Speaker 4: personal issues was affecting our relationship hugely.

1204
00:58:09,240 --> 00:58:12,280
Speaker 2: But after this talk, I thought, surely things would improve.

1205
00:58:13,400 --> 00:58:15,560
Speaker 4: Two weeks Later, on a Friday, he called me to

1206
00:58:15,640 --> 00:58:17,080
Speaker 4: let me know that he had been going out that

1207
00:58:17,200 --> 00:58:19,360
Speaker 4: night with an old friend for some drinks. I hadn't

1208
00:58:19,360 --> 00:58:21,720
Speaker 4: seen him in about four days, so I was obviously

1209
00:58:21,800 --> 00:58:24,480
Speaker 4: upset that his rare free time wasn't being spent with me,

1210
00:58:25,160 --> 00:58:26,920
Speaker 4: But in the end I told him to just do

1211
00:58:26,960 --> 00:58:29,760
Speaker 4: what he wanted and to have fun. About an hour later,

1212
00:58:29,840 --> 00:58:32,880
Speaker 4: he called and said that we needed to talk. I

1213
00:58:32,960 --> 00:58:35,120
Speaker 4: told him that if he wanted to talk, he had

1214
00:58:35,120 --> 00:58:36,840
Speaker 4: to do now, and I wasn't going to wait until

1215
00:58:36,880 --> 00:58:40,080
Speaker 4: morning because he had suggested going to breakfast planning to

1216
00:58:40,200 --> 00:58:42,480
Speaker 4: dumb me over some pancakes messed up.

1217
00:58:42,640 --> 00:58:45,919
Speaker 2: He's a good pancakes. Well they better be. They better

1218
00:58:46,000 --> 00:58:47,600
Speaker 2: bing did bankcaches, That's all I'm saying.

1219
00:58:47,800 --> 00:58:50,000
Speaker 4: He said that he was unhappy, that all he wanted

1220
00:58:50,040 --> 00:58:52,000
Speaker 4: to do was go out and drink and have fun,

1221
00:58:52,520 --> 00:58:55,440
Speaker 4: and that he just needed some time. Of course, I

1222
00:58:55,680 --> 00:58:58,640
Speaker 4: sobbed and begged for him to change his mind and reconsider.

1223
00:58:59,160 --> 00:59:01,480
Speaker 4: He said he loved me like crazy, but needed some

1224
00:59:01,560 --> 00:59:03,840
Speaker 4: time to sort out his problems with the additional stress

1225
00:59:03,880 --> 00:59:05,800
Speaker 4: of a committed, serious relationship.

1226
00:59:06,600 --> 00:59:08,280
Speaker 2: About five months.

1227
00:59:07,960 --> 00:59:10,400
Speaker 4: Past and even though we were not together, we talked

1228
00:59:10,440 --> 00:59:13,720
Speaker 4: almost every day. What We ran into each other at

1229
00:59:13,720 --> 00:59:16,200
Speaker 4: the gym and the bar, always hugging each other tight.

1230
00:59:16,840 --> 00:59:19,080
Speaker 4: One night, he even showed up wasted at two am

1231
00:59:19,160 --> 00:59:21,560
Speaker 4: and spent the night claiming that he couldn't sleep without me.

1232
00:59:21,720 --> 00:59:26,080
Speaker 2: Girl, I don't trust this man. Girl, don't let him

1233
00:59:26,160 --> 00:59:28,560
Speaker 2: get away with this. Yeah, come on.

1234
00:59:29,160 --> 00:59:32,520
Speaker 4: We celebrated Christmas and each other's birthdays together, getting each

1235
00:59:32,520 --> 00:59:35,320
Speaker 4: other presents and cards. He texted me at midnight on

1236
00:59:35,400 --> 00:59:37,560
Speaker 4: Valentine's Day because he wanted to be the first one

1237
00:59:37,560 --> 00:59:39,440
Speaker 4: to say Happy Valentine's.

1238
00:59:40,160 --> 00:59:44,240
Speaker 2: Girl, save yourself. If he doesn't want to be in

1239
00:59:44,280 --> 00:59:46,560
Speaker 2: a relationship, he doesn't want to be in a relationship

1240
00:59:46,600 --> 00:59:49,200
Speaker 2: with you, and he is stringing you along, He's.

1241
00:59:49,120 --> 00:59:51,840
Speaker 4: Just keeping you there as like a like a default. Yeah,

1242
00:59:52,040 --> 00:59:53,920
Speaker 4: I know I have someone there who cares about me.

1243
00:59:54,080 --> 00:59:56,200
Speaker 4: I just I just want to look for other people

1244
00:59:56,240 --> 00:59:56,840
Speaker 4: while I'm at it.

1245
00:59:57,000 --> 01:00:01,120
Speaker 2: Exactly. Don't be his default, the first one to say

1246
01:00:01,120 --> 01:00:01,720
Speaker 2: Happy Valentine.

1247
01:00:01,760 --> 01:00:04,440
Speaker 4: That's what you say on your birthday? Yeah, not like

1248
01:00:04,480 --> 01:00:06,919
Speaker 4: a Valentine's Day. You usually don't have like a ton

1249
01:00:06,920 --> 01:00:10,120
Speaker 4: of Valentines. And to be the first one. Come on,

1250
01:00:11,000 --> 01:00:13,120
Speaker 4: he'd comment on my butt at the gym tell me

1251
01:00:13,160 --> 01:00:15,640
Speaker 4: that I was the prettiest girl there, and he apologized

1252
01:00:15,680 --> 01:00:17,400
Speaker 4: for hurting me and told me I was the best

1253
01:00:17,400 --> 01:00:18,600
Speaker 4: thing that ever happened to him.

1254
01:00:18,760 --> 01:00:20,560
Speaker 2: Yikes, Well, then he would be with you.

1255
01:00:20,640 --> 01:00:23,760
Speaker 4: Yeah, Obviously, I had hoped that things would work out,

1256
01:00:24,000 --> 01:00:26,160
Speaker 4: and I realized that maybe we didn't need to rush

1257
01:00:26,240 --> 01:00:29,160
Speaker 4: getting back together. He had kept me close this long

1258
01:00:29,400 --> 01:00:31,000
Speaker 4: so that he was still madly in love with me,

1259
01:00:31,080 --> 01:00:32,480
Speaker 4: but he needed to worry about himself.

1260
01:00:32,520 --> 01:00:34,760
Speaker 2: Girl, he's just not add into you. Yeah.

1261
01:00:35,560 --> 01:00:38,680
Speaker 4: Then I found out two short weeks after he had

1262
01:00:38,760 --> 01:00:40,440
Speaker 4: dumbed me, he had a one night stand with a

1263
01:00:40,480 --> 01:00:43,960
Speaker 4: girl at a bar and got her pregnant. He has

1264
01:00:44,040 --> 01:00:46,720
Speaker 4: known about it since November and kept it a secret

1265
01:00:46,760 --> 01:00:48,200
Speaker 4: from everyone, including me.

1266
01:00:48,520 --> 01:00:49,640
Speaker 2: I was devastated.

1267
01:00:49,880 --> 01:00:52,800
Speaker 4: What the f was he thinking keeping me close while

1268
01:00:52,840 --> 01:00:54,200
Speaker 4: planning to be a father.

1269
01:00:54,880 --> 01:00:57,320
Speaker 2: He cried when he told me so that he effed up,

1270
01:00:57,560 --> 01:01:00,560
Speaker 2: they ruined everything, and asked me to never forget give him.

1271
01:01:02,120 --> 01:01:05,040
Speaker 4: I wished we could curse on this stream, but I

1272
01:01:05,280 --> 01:01:09,040
Speaker 4: did forgive him, though, after I got over the initial

1273
01:01:09,080 --> 01:01:11,880
Speaker 4: anger of feeling incredibly betrayed. He had told me about

1274
01:01:11,880 --> 01:01:14,280
Speaker 4: a month beforehand that he hadn't been with anyone else,

1275
01:01:14,920 --> 01:01:17,920
Speaker 4: And then the immense sadness that followed, I realized that

1276
01:01:17,960 --> 01:01:19,160
Speaker 4: I still wanted to be with him.

1277
01:01:19,600 --> 01:01:21,720
Speaker 2: I wanted to share the experience with him and help

1278
01:01:21,800 --> 01:01:22,600
Speaker 2: him along the way.

1279
01:01:22,800 --> 01:01:24,720
Speaker 4: If he had had it, if he had had a

1280
01:01:24,800 --> 01:01:26,880
Speaker 4: child when we met, it wouldn't have made a difference.

1281
01:01:26,880 --> 01:01:29,080
Speaker 2: So why would it make a difference now, Girl, he's

1282
01:01:29,080 --> 01:01:32,040
Speaker 2: trying to get you to raise his child. You're not

1283
01:01:32,200 --> 01:01:34,840
Speaker 2: in a relationship with him. Yeah, he doesn't want to

1284
01:01:34,880 --> 01:01:36,200
Speaker 2: be in a relationship with you.

1285
01:01:36,800 --> 01:01:39,920
Speaker 4: Yeah, Like, I think everything that you just said is like,

1286
01:01:40,920 --> 01:01:43,240
Speaker 4: is why it should make a difference now. Like if

1287
01:01:43,280 --> 01:01:46,760
Speaker 4: you started dating while he was co parenting with someone.

1288
01:01:46,840 --> 01:01:48,280
Speaker 2: Sure, totally different. Go ahead.

1289
01:01:48,280 --> 01:01:50,520
Speaker 4: But if he lied to you about sleeping with another

1290
01:01:50,560 --> 01:01:52,680
Speaker 4: person while you guys were on a break and yet

1291
01:01:53,360 --> 01:01:56,520
Speaker 4: kept you along for five months saying that, oh no,

1292
01:01:56,560 --> 01:01:57,880
Speaker 4: I don't want to be in a relationship with you,

1293
01:01:57,920 --> 01:01:59,360
Speaker 4: but I am madly in love with you.

1294
01:01:59,680 --> 01:01:59,919
Speaker 2: Girl.

1295
01:02:00,120 --> 01:02:02,880
Speaker 4: Also, by the way, another woman is five months pregnant

1296
01:02:02,880 --> 01:02:03,520
Speaker 4: with my child.

1297
01:02:03,880 --> 01:02:07,720
Speaker 2: Literally, just like, imagine that you are your friend. Imagine

1298
01:02:07,720 --> 01:02:09,840
Speaker 2: that your friend comes to you and said, oh my god,

1299
01:02:09,880 --> 01:02:12,240
Speaker 2: this guy that I'm not dating and tells me he

1300
01:02:12,280 --> 01:02:15,760
Speaker 2: doesn't want to date me, but I've been hooking out

1301
01:02:15,760 --> 01:02:17,680
Speaker 2: with him for a while. He just told me that

1302
01:02:17,720 --> 01:02:21,320
Speaker 2: he's pregnant. He got another girl pregnant, Yeah, and so

1303
01:02:21,360 --> 01:02:23,480
Speaker 2: I'm gonna help him raise the kid. But he still

1304
01:02:23,520 --> 01:02:25,120
Speaker 2: doesn't want to be in a relationship with me. What

1305
01:02:25,160 --> 01:02:29,040
Speaker 2: would you say to that girl? Yeah? I I hope

1306
01:02:29,080 --> 01:02:33,600
Speaker 2: to God you say, oh what, don't do that? What? Look?

1307
01:02:33,680 --> 01:02:35,200
Speaker 2: Don't don't freaking do that? Uh?

1308
01:02:35,240 --> 01:02:37,720
Speaker 4: Sure he would have new responsibilities, but I told him

1309
01:02:37,720 --> 01:02:40,240
Speaker 4: that I would never ask him to have abandoned them

1310
01:02:40,360 --> 01:02:43,600
Speaker 4: or the child's mother. You just need to abandon him, OPI. Yeah,

1311
01:02:43,680 --> 01:02:45,760
Speaker 4: I wanted to know her too. I wanted to be

1312
01:02:45,840 --> 01:02:47,600
Speaker 4: there when he met his baby and fell in love

1313
01:02:47,640 --> 01:02:49,760
Speaker 4: with her. I told him all of this, poured my

1314
01:02:49,840 --> 01:02:51,280
Speaker 4: heart out and made promises.

1315
01:02:51,800 --> 01:02:54,040
Speaker 2: Ah ya YadA. I told him that I was still

1316
01:02:54,080 --> 01:02:56,560
Speaker 2: holding him to all the promises that he had made me.

1317
01:02:57,240 --> 01:02:59,760
Speaker 4: Girl, he's already broken them. You leave him mind, but

1318
01:03:00,480 --> 01:03:02,960
Speaker 4: he won't even talk to me. He claims he still

1319
01:03:03,400 --> 01:03:06,520
Speaker 4: doesn't know what to say and that he's so confused.

1320
01:03:07,160 --> 01:03:09,160
Speaker 4: He said that he expected me to just walk out

1321
01:03:09,160 --> 01:03:11,800
Speaker 4: of his life, and when I didn't, he was incredibly surprised.

1322
01:03:12,280 --> 01:03:16,120
Speaker 2: He's like all the other girls that I've completely screwed

1323
01:03:16,120 --> 01:03:20,800
Speaker 2: over left me, but you're dull enough to stay. Yeah,

1324
01:03:20,880 --> 01:03:24,200
Speaker 2: that's like interesting. I'm just such a terrible boyfriend.

1325
01:03:24,200 --> 01:03:26,120
Speaker 4: You should never forgive me, But the fact that you

1326
01:03:26,360 --> 01:03:29,640
Speaker 4: stay is just like, oh.

1327
01:03:29,200 --> 01:03:31,920
Speaker 2: Fall in love. Still don't want to date you, but wow,

1328
01:03:32,120 --> 01:03:35,520
Speaker 2: but that warms my heart. So cool that I can

1329
01:03:35,560 --> 01:03:38,760
Speaker 2: do that to you and you'll forgive me. Wow.

1330
01:03:39,840 --> 01:03:39,960
Speaker 1: Uh.

1331
01:03:40,000 --> 01:03:42,440
Speaker 4: At this point, I'm simply not willing to give up

1332
01:03:42,480 --> 01:03:44,080
Speaker 4: on what we had because of a mistake.

1333
01:03:44,400 --> 01:03:49,000
Speaker 2: Crap happens. I'm huh.

1334
01:03:49,200 --> 01:03:51,760
Speaker 4: I'm not an angel either. How can he not be

1335
01:03:51,840 --> 01:03:54,880
Speaker 4: willing to accept what I'm offering? He said, leaving me

1336
01:03:55,040 --> 01:03:57,280
Speaker 4: was his biggest regret. How can he not accept the

1337
01:03:57,280 --> 01:04:00,640
Speaker 4: opportunity to undo that? How can he just walk away

1338
01:04:00,640 --> 01:04:01,240
Speaker 4: from me again?

1339
01:04:01,560 --> 01:04:03,360
Speaker 2: He said? How do I explain to my.

1340
01:04:03,440 --> 01:04:05,400
Speaker 4: Child that when we were on a break, I got

1341
01:04:05,400 --> 01:04:08,680
Speaker 4: someone else pregnant? How can he give himself a life

1342
01:04:08,720 --> 01:04:10,960
Speaker 4: sentence of never being with the person that he loves.

1343
01:04:11,360 --> 01:04:14,160
Speaker 2: I feel so lost without him. When I say that

1344
01:04:14,240 --> 01:04:17,520
Speaker 2: I need him, it's an understatement. I really to do

1345
01:04:17,720 --> 01:04:18,800
Speaker 2: this with him.

1346
01:04:18,800 --> 01:04:21,320
Speaker 4: As a team, Like he always said, we were and

1347
01:04:21,360 --> 01:04:26,920
Speaker 4: we do have an update. But ah, she's lost man,

1348
01:04:28,480 --> 01:04:33,080
Speaker 4: and she's delulu. She is caught up in his lies

1349
01:04:34,000 --> 01:04:36,400
Speaker 4: promises of love. She's lonely.

1350
01:04:36,560 --> 01:04:39,920
Speaker 2: She's lone. That's what it is. She's lonely, like girl,

1351
01:04:40,040 --> 01:04:45,360
Speaker 2: Read this over and imagine it's not you. Please, we

1352
01:04:45,440 --> 01:04:49,080
Speaker 2: do have an ough date. Let's see what happens. First

1353
01:04:49,080 --> 01:04:51,520
Speaker 2: of all, thank you to everyone for the advice.

1354
01:04:51,760 --> 01:04:54,120
Speaker 4: As hard as it is to hear, I appreciate so

1355
01:04:54,240 --> 01:04:56,160
Speaker 4: much that people took the time to read my story

1356
01:04:56,200 --> 01:04:58,400
Speaker 4: and weigh in on what I should do. Really, to

1357
01:04:58,400 --> 01:05:00,120
Speaker 4: be honest, no one has said anything that but I

1358
01:05:00,160 --> 01:05:02,920
Speaker 4: didn't already have consciously understand or no, I should do

1359
01:05:03,600 --> 01:05:05,840
Speaker 4: few things. Part of the reason I chose to forgive

1360
01:05:05,920 --> 01:05:07,840
Speaker 4: him is that is what I was taught to do.

1361
01:05:08,040 --> 01:05:10,440
Speaker 4: If I don't forgive him for what he's done to me,

1362
01:05:10,520 --> 01:05:12,760
Speaker 4: I'll forever hold a grudge against him stopping me from

1363
01:05:12,760 --> 01:05:13,200
Speaker 4: moving out.

1364
01:05:14,280 --> 01:05:17,640
Speaker 2: Girl, you can't move on right now.

1365
01:05:17,920 --> 01:05:19,960
Speaker 4: Someone asked about his relationship with the other women, and

1366
01:05:20,000 --> 01:05:21,200
Speaker 4: I know very little about it.

1367
01:05:21,240 --> 01:05:21,479
Speaker 2: Really.

1368
01:05:21,840 --> 01:05:23,800
Speaker 4: One of the first things my ex told me when

1369
01:05:23,840 --> 01:05:27,040
Speaker 4: he was explaining himself was that really she didn't mean

1370
01:05:27,120 --> 01:05:29,040
Speaker 4: much to him, and if she hadn't called him up

1371
01:05:29,360 --> 01:05:31,760
Speaker 4: and said that she was pregnant, he may have never

1372
01:05:31,800 --> 01:05:32,520
Speaker 4: seen her again.

1373
01:05:32,600 --> 01:05:33,960
Speaker 2: Early you don't mean much to him.

1374
01:05:34,080 --> 01:05:37,320
Speaker 4: Yeah, So I do agree that it's not very likely

1375
01:05:37,360 --> 01:05:40,000
Speaker 4: that this pregnancy resulted from a one night stand, although

1376
01:05:40,000 --> 01:05:42,880
Speaker 4: we all know it is possible. So I have also

1377
01:05:42,920 --> 01:05:45,200
Speaker 4: concluded that this went on for a while. Okay, Yeah,

1378
01:05:45,720 --> 01:05:47,920
Speaker 4: I'm sure that there's a lot I don't know at

1379
01:05:47,920 --> 01:05:50,280
Speaker 4: this point, which might be why I'm so hesitant to

1380
01:05:50,400 --> 01:05:52,720
Speaker 4: initiate letting go interesting.

1381
01:05:53,400 --> 01:05:55,840
Speaker 2: He's like, I have to, I have to go under

1382
01:05:55,880 --> 01:05:58,680
Speaker 2: cover to figure it out the extent of this relationship.

1383
01:05:58,720 --> 01:06:01,680
Speaker 4: I'm like, I'm sure there's so a valid reason for

1384
01:06:01,760 --> 01:06:04,240
Speaker 4: him knocking her up and lying to me about it.

1385
01:06:04,640 --> 01:06:08,160
Speaker 2: I just don't know it yet. Maybe maybe she threatened

1386
01:06:08,240 --> 01:06:11,520
Speaker 2: him to release governments and he had to do it

1387
01:06:11,600 --> 01:06:13,760
Speaker 2: for country, for queen and country.

1388
01:06:13,800 --> 01:06:15,880
Speaker 4: I just have to hold on until this makes sense,

1389
01:06:16,000 --> 01:06:18,120
Speaker 4: because it doesn't right now.

1390
01:06:18,560 --> 01:06:19,320
Speaker 2: This is crazy.

1391
01:06:20,000 --> 01:06:22,880
Speaker 4: I hate loose ends and unanswered questions, so I've berated

1392
01:06:22,960 --> 01:06:23,920
Speaker 4: him with calls and tech.

1393
01:06:24,080 --> 01:06:26,280
Speaker 2: Oh, we spoke earlier today.

1394
01:06:26,640 --> 01:06:28,560
Speaker 4: He called me a few hours after I wrote this

1395
01:06:28,560 --> 01:06:30,800
Speaker 4: post and suggested that we sit down and talk the

1396
01:06:30,840 --> 01:06:33,480
Speaker 4: next few days. I'm willing to do so, but really

1397
01:06:33,560 --> 01:06:35,200
Speaker 4: it's to tie up some loose ends.

1398
01:06:36,720 --> 01:06:39,920
Speaker 2: I don't mean to be harsh. Yeah, I love you.

1399
01:06:40,960 --> 01:06:45,959
Speaker 2: I'm embarrassed for you. It's hard. This is hard, man,

1400
01:06:46,560 --> 01:06:49,560
Speaker 2: It's hard to listen to. It's hard because it's it's

1401
01:06:49,720 --> 01:06:52,320
Speaker 2: really sad. Yeah.

1402
01:06:52,560 --> 01:06:55,800
Speaker 4: Not one single person who commented on this post said

1403
01:06:55,840 --> 01:06:58,920
Speaker 4: anything along the lines of love conquers a or I

1404
01:06:58,960 --> 01:07:01,280
Speaker 4: see where you're coming from, or he's worth it.

1405
01:07:01,760 --> 01:07:07,240
Speaker 2: Not one. Yeah. Take that as a signo, pee please, girl.

1406
01:07:07,600 --> 01:07:09,640
Speaker 4: Even though I initially told myself that I wouldn't let

1407
01:07:09,680 --> 01:07:12,640
Speaker 4: random redditors affect my ultimate decision, it's hard to ignore

1408
01:07:12,680 --> 01:07:14,040
Speaker 4: what I obviously have to do.

1409
01:07:14,560 --> 01:07:15,920
Speaker 2: I have a lot going for me.

1410
01:07:16,040 --> 01:07:18,320
Speaker 4: I'm in my twenties, about to finish my master's degree,

1411
01:07:18,400 --> 01:07:19,880
Speaker 4: and I have a lot of friends who I love

1412
01:07:20,000 --> 01:07:20,439
Speaker 4: very much.

1413
01:07:20,520 --> 01:07:23,240
Speaker 2: I'm going to assume that she is probably in the

1414
01:07:23,360 --> 01:07:25,360
Speaker 2: range of twenty four to twenties.

1415
01:07:25,640 --> 01:07:29,440
Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, I think so. Being able to see the

1416
01:07:29,600 --> 01:07:32,080
Speaker 4: value in those things instead of a broken relationship is

1417
01:07:32,120 --> 01:07:34,760
Speaker 4: a big realization. A lot of people also ask for

1418
01:07:34,840 --> 01:07:37,640
Speaker 4: me to look at the situation more logically. Imagine it

1419
01:07:37,680 --> 01:07:39,760
Speaker 4: happened from an outsider's perspective, et cetera.

1420
01:07:39,840 --> 01:07:42,640
Speaker 2: And that helped too. That's what I said exactly. That's

1421
01:07:42,640 --> 01:07:43,560
Speaker 2: what I said.

1422
01:07:43,920 --> 01:07:45,880
Speaker 4: Obviously, there are a ton of details that I did

1423
01:07:45,880 --> 01:07:49,000
Speaker 4: not include for brevity's sake, and really the only person

1424
01:07:49,000 --> 01:07:52,840
Speaker 4: who completely understands the situation is me, well, being able to.

1425
01:07:52,760 --> 01:07:55,440
Speaker 2: Understand it at all. Actually, yeah, I think everyone else

1426
01:07:55,520 --> 01:07:58,560
Speaker 2: understands it. I know what happened, but you know all

1427
01:07:58,640 --> 01:08:01,200
Speaker 2: the details and understand the situation.

1428
01:08:01,840 --> 01:08:04,040
Speaker 4: But being able to see a clear consensus in a

1429
01:08:04,040 --> 01:08:07,240
Speaker 4: matter of hours from complete unrelated strangers to let go

1430
01:08:07,480 --> 01:08:09,360
Speaker 4: and move on has turned a lot of what I

1431
01:08:09,400 --> 01:08:11,720
Speaker 4: thought I wanted upside down. There's a little bit more

1432
01:08:11,760 --> 01:08:12,280
Speaker 4: to the story.

1433
01:08:12,520 --> 01:08:14,520
Speaker 2: I've said all I needed to say. I think we

1434
01:08:14,560 --> 01:08:16,320
Speaker 2: should just jump right in. I think so too.

1435
01:08:16,600 --> 01:08:19,000
Speaker 4: I could agonize for days over some of the questions,

1436
01:08:19,240 --> 01:08:21,679
Speaker 4: when did it happen? Exactly? Was I sitting at home

1437
01:08:21,800 --> 01:08:24,679
Speaker 4: crying while he was out effing what could have been?

1438
01:08:25,160 --> 01:08:27,640
Speaker 2: But I simply don't want to anymore. I want to

1439
01:08:27,760 --> 01:08:28,840
Speaker 2: desperately move on.

1440
01:08:29,760 --> 01:08:31,920
Speaker 4: I don't want anyone to think that I don't want

1441
01:08:31,960 --> 01:08:34,000
Speaker 4: to move forward from this right now. It's a matter

1442
01:08:34,040 --> 01:08:35,800
Speaker 4: of finding the strength to do the dirty work and

1443
01:08:35,880 --> 01:08:39,160
Speaker 4: ignore his calls, block his numbers, whatever. I think I'm

1444
01:08:39,200 --> 01:08:41,840
Speaker 4: just dreading that so much that it stopped me from

1445
01:08:41,880 --> 01:08:43,720
Speaker 4: seeing the situation for what it really is.

1446
01:08:44,040 --> 01:08:48,800
Speaker 2: Regardless, thank you, welcome. I'm freaking glad this girl is

1447
01:08:48,960 --> 01:08:52,760
Speaker 2: out of there, man, like, get out of there. Shocking

1448
01:08:52,800 --> 01:08:56,320
Speaker 2: that it took literally every Reddit comment saying leave him,

1449
01:08:56,439 --> 01:08:58,960
Speaker 2: leave you, leave him, leave him. She was like, no

1450
01:08:58,960 --> 01:09:02,080
Speaker 2: one's saying that. I should say, Yeah, he's the one.

1451
01:09:02,640 --> 01:09:07,200
Speaker 4: Maybe maybe you guys are honestly wrong, And it's true.

1452
01:09:07,360 --> 01:09:09,760
Speaker 2: You are wrong. It's true. That's okay, you are.

1453
01:09:09,960 --> 01:09:12,320
Speaker 4: I know it's a learn it's a hard pill to swallow,

1454
01:09:12,360 --> 01:09:14,559
Speaker 4: but you've got it, girl, You got it.

1455
01:09:16,160 --> 01:09:18,599
Speaker 1: Sam here ogi host. We're gonna get back to these stories.

1456
01:09:18,600 --> 01:09:20,599
Speaker 1: But here's three minutes fads from our sponsors.

1457
01:09:20,600 --> 01:09:23,120
Speaker 2: First, I hate my best friend, but I'm gonna be

1458
01:09:23,120 --> 01:09:26,599
Speaker 2: your brides maid. Don't do that. I met my best

1459
01:09:26,600 --> 01:09:29,599
Speaker 2: friend ten years ago when we were sixteen. I didn't

1460
01:09:29,640 --> 01:09:31,400
Speaker 2: like her at first, but she saw me laughing and

1461
01:09:31,439 --> 01:09:34,080
Speaker 2: decided she was gonna be my friend, and so she

1462
01:09:34,120 --> 01:09:37,960
Speaker 2: would constantly make conversation until I couldn't ignore her and

1463
01:09:38,000 --> 01:09:41,120
Speaker 2: we became best friends. We were both outsiders with us

1464
01:09:41,120 --> 01:09:44,160
Speaker 2: moving from different schools at around the same time, so

1465
01:09:44,360 --> 01:09:46,840
Speaker 2: we never had other friends but each other in our

1466
01:09:46,960 --> 01:09:50,240
Speaker 2: final years of school. As we have grown up, we

1467
01:09:50,320 --> 01:09:53,240
Speaker 2: kept our friendship and remain close by the way. This

1468
01:09:53,280 --> 01:09:55,080
Speaker 2: comes from deleted and if you want to smit your

1469
01:09:55,120 --> 01:09:57,519
Speaker 2: own stories, go to the rs slash Okay storytimes Seppard.

1470
01:09:57,560 --> 01:10:00,960
Speaker 2: It so about four years ago I met this boy

1471
01:10:01,040 --> 01:10:06,040
Speaker 2: named Jacob. He was my first boyfriend. I've never been pretty,

1472
01:10:06,479 --> 01:10:08,400
Speaker 2: so he was the first guy to show me attention

1473
01:10:08,560 --> 01:10:11,840
Speaker 2: outside of hookups. He took me on my first proper date.

1474
01:10:12,000 --> 01:10:16,120
Speaker 2: We started to plan moving in together, whoa dang, and

1475
01:10:16,160 --> 01:10:20,000
Speaker 2: discussing our future. I was truly happy. But then after

1476
01:10:20,040 --> 01:10:23,080
Speaker 2: a year he said words that made my stomach drop.

1477
01:10:23,240 --> 01:10:23,360
Speaker 1: Uh.

1478
01:10:23,400 --> 01:10:26,040
Speaker 2: Oh. He asked me if I would mind if he

1479
01:10:26,280 --> 01:10:31,639
Speaker 2: started dating my best friend. What while they are dating?

1480
01:10:32,640 --> 01:10:34,639
Speaker 2: What so insane?

1481
01:10:34,800 --> 01:10:38,360
Speaker 5: I don't mind, you go date your best friend.

1482
01:10:40,080 --> 01:10:44,800
Speaker 2: No, uh, but you also can't date me anymore. Yeah. Oh,

1483
01:10:46,960 --> 01:10:49,840
Speaker 2: I could tell you the exact details of that day.

1484
01:10:50,800 --> 01:10:53,360
Speaker 2: I had just finished worked. I had a really good

1485
01:10:53,439 --> 01:10:55,360
Speaker 2: day because my favorite dog had come in and I

1486
01:10:55,439 --> 01:10:57,800
Speaker 2: was on my way back cute. My phone rang in

1487
01:10:57,840 --> 01:11:01,760
Speaker 2: the car and Jacob said he wanted to talk. He

1488
01:11:01,840 --> 01:11:03,880
Speaker 2: told me he had been talking to my best friend

1489
01:11:03,920 --> 01:11:05,680
Speaker 2: for a while and that he fell in love with

1490
01:11:05,720 --> 01:11:08,559
Speaker 2: her and wanted to know if it was okay to

1491
01:11:08,600 --> 01:11:13,920
Speaker 2: start dating her. No, she also felt the same way

1492
01:11:13,960 --> 01:11:18,320
Speaker 2: about him. Oh that's not your best friend or your boyfriend. Actually,

1493
01:11:19,240 --> 01:11:21,559
Speaker 2: she also felt the same way, but said he had

1494
01:11:21,560 --> 01:11:23,960
Speaker 2: to get my permission before they took things further out

1495
01:11:23,960 --> 01:11:25,919
Speaker 2: of respect. That's not respect.

1496
01:11:26,960 --> 01:11:29,360
Speaker 1: No what is this?

1497
01:11:29,640 --> 01:11:32,160
Speaker 4: No no no, And by this title, I don't like

1498
01:11:32,360 --> 01:11:33,320
Speaker 4: where this is going.

1499
01:11:33,560 --> 01:11:38,160
Speaker 2: No, no, no, Sophie, My best friend has always been

1500
01:11:38,160 --> 01:11:40,760
Speaker 2: the pretty one, which has never been an issue. Of course,

1501
01:11:40,800 --> 01:11:42,840
Speaker 2: she's beautiful. I tell her that all the time. I

1502
01:11:42,960 --> 01:11:46,519
Speaker 2: packed Jacob's things out of my house and handed them

1503
01:11:46,520 --> 01:11:50,040
Speaker 2: to him with a smile and congratulated them. It wasn't

1504
01:11:50,080 --> 01:11:52,760
Speaker 2: until the next day I even cried or got angry.

1505
01:11:53,000 --> 01:11:55,800
Speaker 2: But ever since the resentment has been building. It isn't

1506
01:11:55,880 --> 01:11:58,519
Speaker 2: like a I hate this bee kind of resentment. I'm

1507
01:11:58,520 --> 01:12:00,360
Speaker 2: still her friend, but it's like I can't be with

1508
01:12:00,439 --> 01:12:02,519
Speaker 2: her for longer than a few hours or everything she

1509
01:12:02,560 --> 01:12:08,360
Speaker 2: does start to annoy me. Girl, this is your fault.

1510
01:12:08,920 --> 01:12:12,519
Speaker 2: What is happening here? When someone says I want to

1511
01:12:12,560 --> 01:12:16,360
Speaker 2: steal your boyfriend, and your boyfriend says I want to

1512
01:12:16,400 --> 01:12:19,200
Speaker 2: date your best friend. You say, you guys suck Bye,

1513
01:12:19,880 --> 01:12:22,120
Speaker 2: that's what you said. I'm still her friend, but it's

1514
01:12:22,160 --> 01:12:24,040
Speaker 2: like I can't be with her for longer than a

1515
01:12:24,080 --> 01:12:26,640
Speaker 2: few hours, or everything she does starts to annoy me.

1516
01:12:26,920 --> 01:12:29,080
Speaker 2: Why does she look at her phone so much? Why

1517
01:12:29,120 --> 01:12:31,760
Speaker 2: does she expect me to buy her so much? Why

1518
01:12:31,840 --> 01:12:34,559
Speaker 2: is everything she says only about her? Why does she

1519
01:12:34,680 --> 01:12:38,160
Speaker 2: talk over everyone? You know, just those tiny things you

1520
01:12:38,280 --> 01:12:41,960
Speaker 2: used to ignore become unbearable, so I have to make

1521
01:12:42,000 --> 01:12:45,479
Speaker 2: an excuse and go. Well. Now, three years after the breakup,

1522
01:12:45,479 --> 01:12:48,200
Speaker 2: they're married and she wants me to be your bridesmaid.

1523
01:12:52,520 --> 01:12:57,160
Speaker 2: You're dumb. This is crazy. You're dumb? Ah, Why is

1524
01:12:57,160 --> 01:13:01,920
Speaker 2: everyone in these stories stupid? I'm sorry, Sorry, Yeah, you're dumb.

1525
01:13:02,720 --> 01:13:04,800
Speaker 2: I don't mean to be harsh, but you are. I

1526
01:13:04,800 --> 01:13:07,960
Speaker 2: don't want to say yes, then don't. The thought makes

1527
01:13:08,000 --> 01:13:10,320
Speaker 2: me feel sick, Then don't do it. I hate my

1528
01:13:10,320 --> 01:13:12,120
Speaker 2: best friend so much. I don't want to be a

1529
01:13:12,120 --> 01:13:13,920
Speaker 2: part of her wedding, but I know I'll say yes.

1530
01:13:14,160 --> 01:13:17,760
Speaker 2: You're dumb because if I say no, it will make

1531
01:13:17,800 --> 01:13:21,479
Speaker 2: her unhappy, and I'd become the bad guy. No one

1532
01:13:21,520 --> 01:13:25,560
Speaker 2: would think that you are the bad guy. Your boyfriend

1533
01:13:25,560 --> 01:13:30,840
Speaker 2: and your best friend cheated on you together, you don't

1534
01:13:30,880 --> 01:13:34,200
Speaker 2: have to go to their wedding. Oh man, So I'll

1535
01:13:34,240 --> 01:13:38,360
Speaker 2: be the head bridesmaid who's one and only boyfriend left

1536
01:13:38,400 --> 01:13:41,639
Speaker 2: her for the bride, and I'll smile and act happy.

1537
01:13:41,960 --> 01:13:43,960
Speaker 2: Maybe the universe will have mercy and have a truck

1538
01:13:44,040 --> 01:13:45,800
Speaker 2: run me over on the way to the rehearsal dinner

1539
01:13:45,840 --> 01:13:46,240
Speaker 2: or something.

1540
01:13:46,720 --> 01:13:47,000
Speaker 4: Dump.

1541
01:13:48,200 --> 01:13:52,439
Speaker 5: Okay, ah, they're just gonna be there so they can

1542
01:13:52,479 --> 01:13:53,439
Speaker 5: point and laugh at you.

1543
01:13:53,520 --> 01:13:54,400
Speaker 2: Ha ha ha ha.

1544
01:13:54,640 --> 01:13:55,400
Speaker 5: That's the only reason.

1545
01:13:55,600 --> 01:13:56,600
Speaker 2: What are you gonna do it? They gonna have you

1546
01:13:56,680 --> 01:13:58,680
Speaker 2: do a speech, and you're gonna be like when I

1547
01:13:58,920 --> 01:14:02,559
Speaker 2: started dating gonna name him Brad. When I started bad

1548
01:14:03,720 --> 01:14:09,280
Speaker 2: three years ago, I knew that my best friend Sherry

1549
01:14:10,200 --> 01:14:12,240
Speaker 2: would love him. That would be so perfect.

1550
01:14:12,960 --> 01:14:15,799
Speaker 4: Just just totally if you're you're made of honor speech,

1551
01:14:15,880 --> 01:14:19,000
Speaker 4: just totally calm out and be like, yeah, they Yeah,

1552
01:14:19,040 --> 01:14:21,040
Speaker 4: I knew that they would be perfect together when I

1553
01:14:21,120 --> 01:14:23,000
Speaker 4: was dating him and he asked if he could date

1554
01:14:23,040 --> 01:14:25,280
Speaker 4: her when we were still freaking together.

1555
01:14:25,600 --> 01:14:28,240
Speaker 2: And I waited three years to tell this story.

1556
01:14:28,960 --> 01:14:31,960
Speaker 4: Yeah, I'm so happy that they finally found each other

1557
01:14:32,040 --> 01:14:34,320
Speaker 4: while I was in a relationship with him and they

1558
01:14:34,400 --> 01:14:38,280
Speaker 4: were secretly emotionally cheating behind my back. I'm so happy

1559
01:14:38,360 --> 01:14:39,400
Speaker 4: for them.

1560
01:14:39,920 --> 01:14:43,120
Speaker 2: Update. So I will not be saying yes or no.

1561
01:14:43,680 --> 01:14:47,520
Speaker 2: I think I'm just gonna ghost them. What I mean, Sure,

1562
01:14:47,680 --> 01:14:49,839
Speaker 2: go ahead, it's better than your first.

1563
01:14:49,600 --> 01:14:54,040
Speaker 5: Off you angry and say no and explain yourself.

1564
01:14:53,640 --> 01:14:57,280
Speaker 2: To honestly if op. If the option is yes, or

1565
01:14:57,360 --> 01:15:01,680
Speaker 2: ghost ghosts them. I'm moving states anyway, and I can

1566
01:15:01,760 --> 01:15:04,920
Speaker 2: move up the date from mid next year to February

1567
01:15:04,960 --> 01:15:07,080
Speaker 2: if I want. I know they will talk crap about

1568
01:15:07,120 --> 01:15:09,559
Speaker 2: me behind my back, but I don't care anymore. I

1569
01:15:09,560 --> 01:15:11,320
Speaker 2: won't be able to hear it. I'll be a three

1570
01:15:11,320 --> 01:15:14,879
Speaker 2: hour plane right away. I will also block them on everything.

1571
01:15:15,040 --> 01:15:17,360
Speaker 2: They also don't know I'm moving because they never asked

1572
01:15:17,479 --> 01:15:21,160
Speaker 2: or care. Are we shocked that they don't care about you?

1573
01:15:21,560 --> 01:15:23,960
Speaker 2: Because if I don't say no to being bridesmaid, she

1574
01:15:23,960 --> 01:15:27,200
Speaker 2: will assume yes, and so she will be planning as

1575
01:15:27,240 --> 01:15:29,479
Speaker 2: if involved, even if I don't join in.

1576
01:15:29,560 --> 01:15:31,880
Speaker 4: Sure, then you go and you have that expensive food

1577
01:15:32,080 --> 01:15:33,320
Speaker 4: and cake, and then you dip.

1578
01:15:34,000 --> 01:15:37,320
Speaker 2: I'm only here for the food. Minor update. I spoke

1579
01:15:37,320 --> 01:15:39,240
Speaker 2: to my boss at my new job about moving up

1580
01:15:39,280 --> 01:15:41,880
Speaker 2: the date of my move to early next year, and

1581
01:15:41,920 --> 01:15:43,800
Speaker 2: they said I can move the date up to late

1582
01:15:43,880 --> 01:15:46,439
Speaker 2: November if I want. Because of the December rush they

1583
01:15:46,439 --> 01:15:49,120
Speaker 2: will need an extra pair of hands, so I will

1584
01:15:49,160 --> 01:15:51,040
Speaker 2: be gone by the end of the year. I have

1585
01:15:51,080 --> 01:15:53,120
Speaker 2: two months to go house hunting and get my stuff

1586
01:15:53,160 --> 01:15:58,080
Speaker 2: down south. Wish me luck. Comments. We've been waiting for

1587
01:15:58,160 --> 01:16:04,080
Speaker 2: these little when we accidentally started. Yeah, we needed that

1588
01:16:04,120 --> 01:16:07,800
Speaker 2: content to understand why these comments are about to rip

1589
01:16:07,840 --> 01:16:14,719
Speaker 2: into her. Absolutely Comment one, Babe, she should have never

1590
01:16:15,000 --> 01:16:18,280
Speaker 2: talked to your boyfriend and she should have never asked

1591
01:16:18,280 --> 01:16:20,479
Speaker 2: you if it was okay to date him. That's so eft.

1592
01:16:21,120 --> 01:16:23,640
Speaker 2: A real friend would never do that, especially while you

1593
01:16:23,720 --> 01:16:28,080
Speaker 2: were actively dating him. Comment too, if I say no,

1594
01:16:28,200 --> 01:16:29,840
Speaker 2: that it'd make her unhappy and then I'd be the

1595
01:16:29,840 --> 01:16:33,479
Speaker 2: bad guy. So be the bad guy. There's nothing wrong

1596
01:16:33,520 --> 01:16:35,559
Speaker 2: with doing what you want for yourself if that makes

1597
01:16:35,560 --> 01:16:39,160
Speaker 2: you the bad guy. If it you're the bad guy,

1598
01:16:39,240 --> 01:16:41,439
Speaker 2: what are they gonna do. Hold you at gunpoint, to

1599
01:16:41,479 --> 01:16:44,439
Speaker 2: be embarrassed at the wedding, not go through with the wedding,

1600
01:16:44,560 --> 01:16:46,559
Speaker 2: not talk to you anymore. You don't seem to like

1601
01:16:46,600 --> 01:16:50,080
Speaker 2: her much as it is anymore. Ope, he says, fine,

1602
01:16:50,080 --> 01:16:51,920
Speaker 2: but if they hold me at pew pew point, you're

1603
01:16:51,920 --> 01:16:56,519
Speaker 2: gonna feel real guilty, me guilty for real though. I

1604
01:16:56,600 --> 01:16:58,160
Speaker 2: know what I have to do. But it's like, you know,

1605
01:16:58,240 --> 01:17:00,280
Speaker 2: when you just don't want to deal with the fallout.

1606
01:17:00,880 --> 01:17:02,880
Speaker 2: You've been dealing with the fallout for three years. The

1607
01:17:02,920 --> 01:17:05,960
Speaker 2: fallout is that your ex boyfriend and your ex friend

1608
01:17:05,960 --> 01:17:08,840
Speaker 2: are getting married. Everything has already fallen. The message is

1609
01:17:08,840 --> 01:17:11,559
Speaker 2: about dragging of your name through the mud and the anger.

1610
01:17:11,600 --> 01:17:14,599
Speaker 2: It's just so tiring just to think about it. Comment three,

1611
01:17:15,000 --> 01:17:18,360
Speaker 2: What the heck? Stop being a doormat, dump herd block

1612
01:17:18,400 --> 01:17:20,320
Speaker 2: her butt, tell her heck no, you will not be

1613
01:17:20,479 --> 01:17:23,799
Speaker 2: in or at her wedding because she's a selfish, self

1614
01:17:23,840 --> 01:17:26,920
Speaker 2: centered witch and you have zero desire to even be

1615
01:17:27,000 --> 01:17:30,759
Speaker 2: her friend anymore, and she expects you to buy her crap.

1616
01:17:31,040 --> 01:17:33,559
Speaker 2: She has clearly been using and bullying you through this

1617
01:17:33,600 --> 01:17:36,720
Speaker 2: whole relationship, so stop putting up with it. There is

1618
01:17:36,760 --> 01:17:39,559
Speaker 2: an update, folks. It's been a while since I made

1619
01:17:39,600 --> 01:17:42,080
Speaker 2: the post, Sue, I thought I would update you, as

1620
01:17:42,120 --> 01:17:45,200
Speaker 2: Sophie now knows I don't like her. She didn't know good.

1621
01:17:45,920 --> 01:17:48,000
Speaker 2: I went to a dinner with me, her, her sister,

1622
01:17:48,080 --> 01:17:51,599
Speaker 2: and another girl I don't know, Allison. The dinner was fine.

1623
01:17:52,000 --> 01:17:54,479
Speaker 2: I didn't really say much because I have been really

1624
01:17:54,560 --> 01:17:57,680
Speaker 2: stressed with work and moving. I've been flying in and

1625
01:17:57,720 --> 01:17:59,840
Speaker 2: out of the state trying to sort things out in

1626
01:17:59,840 --> 01:18:02,120
Speaker 2: My dogs are staying at my mom's house, but one

1627
01:18:02,120 --> 01:18:05,360
Speaker 2: of them just got sick. Basically, I am dealing with enough.

1628
01:18:05,720 --> 01:18:07,800
Speaker 2: At the dinner, Sophie brings up me and my ex

1629
01:18:07,880 --> 01:18:09,200
Speaker 2: and how I brought them together.

1630
01:18:09,479 --> 01:18:18,240
Speaker 4: No, no, ha, you are sorely, sorely mistaken, Allison and.

1631
01:18:18,240 --> 01:18:20,479
Speaker 2: I smiled at first and laughed it off because I

1632
01:18:20,479 --> 01:18:22,360
Speaker 2: didn't want to make a big deal out of anything.

1633
01:18:22,920 --> 01:18:25,360
Speaker 2: Allison said in passing she finds it weird that I

1634
01:18:25,400 --> 01:18:29,400
Speaker 2: haven't dated anyone since I again didn't say anything because

1635
01:18:29,400 --> 01:18:31,479
Speaker 2: I'm not hung up on him. I'm just not interested

1636
01:18:31,479 --> 01:18:34,160
Speaker 2: in anyone. I have my own busy life and the

1637
01:18:34,160 --> 01:18:36,360
Speaker 2: thought of coming home from work after spending all day

1638
01:18:36,439 --> 01:18:39,599
Speaker 2: pleasing clients and worrying about another person makes me feel drained.

1639
01:18:40,320 --> 01:18:43,040
Speaker 2: Sophie made a joke about how I'm secretly in love

1640
01:18:43,080 --> 01:18:44,880
Speaker 2: with her fiance and I'm going to ring on the

1641
01:18:44,920 --> 01:18:49,360
Speaker 2: wedding and everyone laughed. I just said I'm not going

1642
01:18:49,439 --> 01:18:52,559
Speaker 2: to go. It was like all emotions just turned off

1643
01:18:53,200 --> 01:18:55,800
Speaker 2: and I couldn't even be angry. Go ahead. I didn't

1644
01:18:55,840 --> 01:18:59,240
Speaker 2: care how any of them felt anymore. I said, I'm

1645
01:18:59,280 --> 01:19:02,320
Speaker 2: not going and I'm moving so she won't see me anymore.

1646
01:19:02,880 --> 01:19:05,240
Speaker 2: I told her how awful she was and then left.

1647
01:19:05,680 --> 01:19:11,320
Speaker 2: All right, finally, Wow, it only took forever. Yeah. After that,

1648
01:19:11,439 --> 01:19:14,320
Speaker 2: I got flooded with calls and texts from her asking

1649
01:19:14,360 --> 01:19:17,519
Speaker 2: me what was wrong with me? But I just don't care.

1650
01:19:18,280 --> 01:19:20,280
Speaker 2: I went to work and told them I'm taking my leave,

1651
01:19:20,400 --> 01:19:22,680
Speaker 2: which I was going to get paid out, and now

1652
01:19:22,720 --> 01:19:24,720
Speaker 2: I'm not working. I'm staying with my aunt in the

1653
01:19:24,760 --> 01:19:27,400
Speaker 2: state i'm moving to, and I move into my house

1654
01:19:27,479 --> 01:19:31,000
Speaker 2: next week. My dogs joined me in two weeks. And yeah,

1655
01:19:31,240 --> 01:19:33,040
Speaker 2: there's a little bit left to this story. Do you

1656
01:19:33,040 --> 01:19:35,720
Speaker 2: have any final thoughts. I am really glad that she

1657
01:19:35,960 --> 01:19:37,960
Speaker 2: stood up for herself because I was going to commit

1658
01:19:38,000 --> 01:19:41,880
Speaker 2: an act of violence. Yeah, I was gonna. I was

1659
01:19:41,920 --> 01:19:43,000
Speaker 2: gonna comit aim act to mind.

1660
01:19:43,200 --> 01:19:45,000
Speaker 4: I was gonna start to be violent, and I'm really

1661
01:19:45,000 --> 01:19:46,960
Speaker 4: glad that I don't have to do that anymore. So

1662
01:19:47,520 --> 01:19:50,880
Speaker 4: thanks thanks for doing that, op, because oh man, oh man,

1663
01:19:51,040 --> 01:19:51,639
Speaker 4: oh man.

1664
01:19:52,680 --> 01:19:56,240
Speaker 2: There's a seat a bit left to the story, so

1665
01:19:56,240 --> 01:19:59,320
Speaker 2: we're gonna hit it. Let's do it. It's not a

1666
01:19:59,400 --> 01:20:02,800
Speaker 2: huge story. I think I'm emotionally burnt out. I reckon

1667
01:20:02,880 --> 01:20:05,479
Speaker 2: you are. It feels like all this anger built up

1668
01:20:05,520 --> 01:20:08,320
Speaker 2: and then like a sparkler just ended. I don't even

1669
01:20:08,360 --> 01:20:10,600
Speaker 2: want to think about them anymore. I just want to

1670
01:20:10,600 --> 01:20:13,800
Speaker 2: move on and pretend the chapter of my life never existed.

1671
01:20:14,240 --> 01:20:17,400
Speaker 2: So f you, Sophie, I hope your cake is salt

1672
01:20:17,439 --> 01:20:19,519
Speaker 2: in it instead of sugar. And hope you spilled red

1673
01:20:19,520 --> 01:20:23,599
Speaker 2: wine on your white dress. Getter, Getter, Ope, yetter, common wine.

1674
01:20:23,720 --> 01:20:27,160
Speaker 2: What's gross is so Sophia knew she left up everything

1675
01:20:27,200 --> 01:20:29,840
Speaker 2: and was poking the bear you about the situation. Yeah,

1676
01:20:30,120 --> 01:20:33,000
Speaker 2: she should have just kept her mouth shut. I'm glad

1677
01:20:33,000 --> 01:20:34,920
Speaker 2: you got out and we'll be free of them both

1678
01:20:35,160 --> 01:20:37,320
Speaker 2: Common two says. I hope a year from now Jacob

1679
01:20:37,360 --> 01:20:39,840
Speaker 2: calls her and tells her they need to talk because

1680
01:20:39,880 --> 01:20:42,000
Speaker 2: he's been talking to Alison and he's in love with

1681
01:20:42,000 --> 01:20:44,320
Speaker 2: her and would like Sophie's permission to start dating her.

1682
01:20:44,880 --> 01:20:47,880
Speaker 2: Good for you, op have a great life. You deserve it,

1683
01:20:48,479 --> 01:20:51,799
Speaker 2: reply good wine. When man marries the mistress, he creates

1684
01:20:51,800 --> 01:20:55,400
Speaker 2: a vacancy. Common three save some resentment for the ex

1685
01:20:55,439 --> 01:20:57,439
Speaker 2: boyfriend too. I'd hate to think you were still in

1686
01:20:57,439 --> 01:20:59,920
Speaker 2: love with a wiener who'd break up by asking to

1687
01:21:00,080 --> 01:21:03,240
Speaker 2: date your then friend. They deserve equal scorn, and you're

1688
01:21:03,280 --> 01:21:07,280
Speaker 2: gonna find much better friends and romantic partners after you've moved.

1689
01:21:07,760 --> 01:21:10,120
Speaker 2: Opie says, I am angry at him too. It's just

1690
01:21:10,160 --> 01:21:12,439
Speaker 2: that we don't speak, so I can't really say much

1691
01:21:12,439 --> 01:21:14,559
Speaker 2: about him other than I hope he chokes on a grape.

1692
01:21:15,120 --> 01:21:17,160
Speaker 2: Opie needs therapy.