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Speaker 1: On this week's episode of Cultivating her Space. No matter

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Speaker 1: how lonely you are right now, there are people in

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Speaker 1: the world who are like you. Okay, you are not

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Speaker 1: the only one, and there are people out there who

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Speaker 1: are waiting to love on you, support you, and see

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Speaker 1: you for who you are. And so even though you

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Speaker 1: may not see that right now, just know that you're

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Speaker 1: not alone.

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Speaker 2: Hey, lady, have you ever felt like the world just

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Speaker 2: doesn't get you? Well, we do.

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Speaker 1: Welcome to Cultivating her Space, the podcast dedicated to uplifting

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Speaker 1: and empowering women like you.

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Speaker 2: We're your hosts, Doctor Dominique Brussard and educator and psychologists.

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Speaker 1: And Terry Lomax, a techie and transformational speaker.

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Speaker 2: Join us every week for authentic conversations about everything from

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Speaker 2: fibroids to fake friends as we create space for black

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Speaker 2: women to just be.

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Speaker 1: Before we dive in, make sure you hit that follow

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Speaker 1: button and leave us a quick five star review. Lady,

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Speaker 1: We are black founded and black owned, and your support

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Speaker 1: will help us reach even more women like you.

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Speaker 2: Now, let's get into this week's episode of Cultivating her Space.

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Speaker 3: It's doctor dom here from the Cultivating her Space podcast.

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Speaker 3: Are you currently a resident of the state of California

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Speaker 3: in contemplating starting your therapy journey. Well, if so, please

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Speaker 3: reach out to me at doctor Dominique Brusard dot com.

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Speaker 3: That's d R D O M I N I q

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Speaker 3: U E B R O U ss ar D dot

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Speaker 3: com to schedule a free fifteen minute consultation. I look

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Speaker 3: forward to hearing from you, all right. Our quote of

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Speaker 3: the day, community is much more than belonging to something.

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Speaker 3: It's about doing something together that makes belonging matter. All right,

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Speaker 3: I'm gonna say that again one time for the folks

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Speaker 3: in the back.

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Speaker 2: Community. It's much more than belonging to something. It's about

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Speaker 2: doing something together that makes belonging matter. All right, t

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Speaker 2: you know I'm turning it to you. What do you

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Speaker 2: think of this quote? What comes up for you when

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Speaker 2: you hear how quote of the day?

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Speaker 1: Well, first time, you just say I love this quote.

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Speaker 1: It's so I think it's such a beautiful quote. And

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Speaker 1: I know that I'm going to listen to the podcast

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Speaker 1: after and be like, damn, I should have said this,

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Speaker 1: because I feel like I'm going to think of something

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Speaker 1: else after. But when I hear this quote, what comes

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Speaker 1: up for me is that community is really about the

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Speaker 1: quality of the time spent, the activities that we do,

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Speaker 1: and it's more about I don't know, it's just more

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Speaker 1: about the connection, the vibe, not just like, oh, I'm

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Speaker 1: part of this group, but it's like, what are we

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Speaker 1: doing in the group, What does the group stand for?

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Speaker 1: What is the mission? What is the purpose? So to

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Speaker 1: me it sounds like there's more depth and there's more

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Speaker 1: depth to the meaning of community, if that makes sense. Yes,

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Speaker 1: what about you? What comes up for you?

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Speaker 2: I like that, I like what you said about the depth.

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Speaker 2: For me, it's about the feeling. It's about that feeling,

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Speaker 2: that sense of belonging, right, and so, like the top

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Speaker 2: of the quote, it's about They say that community is

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Speaker 2: more than belonging to something. It's about so and then

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Speaker 2: they talk about it's doing something together that makes belonging matter.

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Speaker 2: And so for me, it's not so much the something

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Speaker 2: that we're doing, but that the belonging is happening at all.

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Speaker 2: Because people do things. You can do things together or

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Speaker 2: do things with another person, do things you know, in

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Speaker 2: community use myer quotes here in community all the time.

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Speaker 2: That doesn't mean that you actually feel the sense of belonging.

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Speaker 1: Yes, or even connectedness, right, Like, I've been in plenty

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Speaker 1: of spaces with people, but it didn't feel connection or

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Speaker 1: it felt lonely still, So yes, I love I love

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Speaker 1: this quote. Great quote. So shall we just talk about

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Speaker 1: before we jump in y'all to the topic, right, because

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Speaker 1: it's going to be a really I think it's going

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Speaker 1: to be a very powerful topic because of the times

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Speaker 1: that we're in these days. Dom, Do you want to

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Speaker 1: talk a little bit about why this topic is important

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Speaker 1: and why we're covering this today and we're going to

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Speaker 1: give y'all some data backed information here, Okay.

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Speaker 2: Yes, yes, So I think it's important to note that

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Speaker 2: as we talk about the sense of belonging, we talk

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Speaker 2: about the power of community. In the US in particular,

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Speaker 2: we are truly experience anding loneliness, and to some extent,

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Speaker 2: some people are also experiencing social isolation. And I want

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Speaker 2: to distinguish between those two. So loneliness this is your

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Speaker 2: subjective sense of whether your relationship and community involvements are

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Speaker 2: fulfilling that deep down intrinsic need for social connection. Right.

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Speaker 2: So it could be that you have lots of social relationships,

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Speaker 2: but if that need for that sense of belonging, like

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Speaker 2: if you don't feel that sense of belonging. If you

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Speaker 2: don't feel that connectedness, then you are going to be lonely.

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Speaker 2: You're going to feel lonely. Right. Social isolation can stem

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Speaker 2: from feelings of loneliness, because if you find yourself in

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Speaker 2: spaces where you're feeling lonely, then you may start to

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Speaker 2: withdraw from those relationships and those connections. But social isolation

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Speaker 2: can be something that's happening before you, since before you

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Speaker 2: feel lonely and can lead to loneliness, right, So it

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Speaker 2: can it can start in either direction. What we know,

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Speaker 2: some recent research says that seventy of adults who consider

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Speaker 2: themselves lonely have little or no sense of meaning or purpose. Right.

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Speaker 2: Twenty one percent of adults in the US report feeling lonely. Right,

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Speaker 2: so I'm gonna say that again. Twenty one percent of

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Speaker 2: the adults surveyed in the US report feeling lonely. Now, lady,

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Speaker 2: you might hear that twenty one percent. Well, twenty one

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Speaker 2: percent out of one hundred is not even a quarter

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Speaker 2: of Americans, right, But for those who participated in the survey,

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Speaker 2: fifty percent of the research participants reported being lonely on

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Speaker 2: some level. That is alarming. Fifty percent of Americans who

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Speaker 2: participated in that survey reported feeling lonely on some level.

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Speaker 2: I think we need this, We need this conversation around

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Speaker 2: how to build community because what that tells me, what

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Speaker 2: this research tells me, is that there are lots of

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Speaker 2: folks out there, and Lady, we might be talking specifically

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Speaker 2: about you who are currently feeling lonely and are struggling

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Speaker 2: to find and build true community.

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Speaker 1: So we got you, girls, So stay tuned. Okay, we

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Speaker 1: got you, because I've definitely experience don't know about you them,

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Speaker 1: I've definitely experienced that in life where I've been in

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Speaker 1: a room full of people and fell alone or didn't

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Speaker 1: feel seen or heard, and so it's very like you said,

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Speaker 1: it's very important that we're having this conversation. So, lady,

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Speaker 1: before we jump into the episode and we share seven

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Speaker 1: ways to build or deepen community, we want to take

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Speaker 1: a moment to pause and reflect, because how can you

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Speaker 1: build real aligned connections if you're not grounded and who

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Speaker 1: you are, what you need, and how you're showing up

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Speaker 1: in this season because in each season of life, we

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Speaker 1: may be showing up differently, maybe different things. Right, So

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Speaker 1: that's where the Soulful Connection check incomes in. So this

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Speaker 1: is our space to slow down, get honest with ourselves,

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Speaker 1: and do a little self scan before we reach outward.

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Speaker 1: Because meaningful community, guess what it starts within. So we're

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Speaker 1: going to be in reducing this segment and a few

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Speaker 1: episodes moving forward, so let us know what you think.

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Speaker 1: Make sure to rate us on Apple Podcasts, whatever platform

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Speaker 1: you listen to the podcast on, or visit our Instagram

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Speaker 1: at Herspace podcast, and you can also visit our website

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Speaker 1: herspace podcast dot com. We're going to do a very

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Speaker 1: quick overview of the sections right now of the Soulful

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Speaker 1: check In, the Soulful Connection check In, but you can

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Speaker 1: visit our Patreon and tune into the after show where

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Speaker 1: you can see the video episode if y'all watching the video,

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Speaker 1: Hey y'all, and you can get the full overview of

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Speaker 1: these questions because it's very powerful, Domina. I've already reviewed them,

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Speaker 1: and it's super powerful when you think about building community

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Speaker 1: in your life. So today's section, or for this section

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Speaker 1: or segment for today, we have these three sections. The

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Speaker 1: first one is know yourself right, so getting clear on

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Speaker 1: your current state before you calling your people right because

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Speaker 1: how you going to call them people if you don't

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Speaker 1: know where you are and what you need. Right, The

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Speaker 1: second one is to or the second section is to

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Speaker 1: name your need, so you can't ask for what you

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Speaker 1: need if you don't know what it is, as I

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Speaker 1: just said, right, So that's super important. And then number

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Speaker 1: three is on a capacity. Not everyone needs a big group.

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Speaker 1: Some of us just need consistency in a safe space.

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Speaker 1: And so doing this audit is going to allow you

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Speaker 1: to understand where you are, what you need, and what

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Speaker 1: you're going to be cultivating or bringing in for yourself.

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Speaker 1: So tune into the after show, you can get your journal,

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Speaker 1: you can really get reflective on this because this activity

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Speaker 1: can really help you call in exactly what you're asking

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Speaker 1: for in your life right now. So I say we

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Speaker 1: jump in, Oh you have something?

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Speaker 2: Before we jump in, I think it's important for people

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Speaker 2: to really understand what we're offering here with this soulful connection. Right.

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Speaker 2: So we just gave you three sections, but that's not all. Right.

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Speaker 2: Within these three sections, when you check out the after show,

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Speaker 2: you get specific guided questions to help you work through

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Speaker 2: each of these sections. Lady, I don't know about you,

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Speaker 2: but when I am taking time to reflect. Having some

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Speaker 2: guided questions can be helpful in some respects can be

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Speaker 2: similar to a coaching session, a therapy session. But it's

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Speaker 2: just for you, right, and so we're giving you these

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Speaker 2: intentional questions, but you have to go to the after

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Speaker 2: show to check them out.

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Speaker 1: Thank you for bringing up Don, now that you don't

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Speaker 1: care a little like we should share one question. We

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Speaker 1: should share just one question from one of the sections.

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Speaker 1: I'm trying to think of which one. Oh, okay, I

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Speaker 1: see one that just stood out to me. This question

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Speaker 1: is under the know yourself section, and the question is

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Speaker 1: where do I feel most me? Who am I around

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Speaker 1: when that happens? That is such a powerful question. Yes, right,

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Speaker 1: we could probably do a whole episode on that question

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Speaker 1: in and of itself. But lady, these are the types

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Speaker 1: of questions you'll see in those sections. So thank you again,

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Speaker 1: Don for sir going back to make sure we really

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Speaker 1: gave that. It's due time. So I'm excited for these

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Speaker 1: seven ways to build a dieperent communities. So let's jump

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Speaker 1: on into number one. And number one is join something

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Speaker 1: you genuinely love. And we truly believe that the easiest

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Speaker 1: way to find aligned people is to go where your

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Speaker 1: joy lives. And I actually had an experience recently where

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Speaker 1: I did this and had a very powerful experience. I'll

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Speaker 1: share that in just a bit, but first I want

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Speaker 1: to say that joy is magnetic. Right When you do

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Speaker 1: what you love, your people show up, right, and when

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Speaker 1: you think about the spaces where you feel the most

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Speaker 1: you and where you feel safe, those are typically the

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Speaker 1: spaces that you want to continue to be in. Right.

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Speaker 1: It's like I think about the torque class that we

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Speaker 1: went to a couple of years ago down and even

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Speaker 1: when we had our live show in the Bay Area,

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Speaker 1: that was a space where it felt like time didn't

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Speaker 1: even exist and we were just there with our people,

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Speaker 1: feeling connected, feeling seen and heard. And so I think

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Speaker 1: that you know, doing something that you genuinely love can

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Speaker 1: really help you with tracked your people. That could be

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Speaker 1: a pottery class, it could be yoga, I don't know

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Speaker 1: what other things that are we into, dance class or

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Speaker 1: gym brunt, yes, dobs an queen listen. And the experience

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Speaker 1: I want to share down before we get your insight

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Speaker 1: on this is that last year I was really in

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Speaker 1: a space of wanting to cultivate more community and trying

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Speaker 1: to find people that were into meditation and like the

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Speaker 1: self work and that journey. And so I went to

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Speaker 1: this amazing week long meditation retreat and I met many

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Speaker 1: people there that I've connected with and stay connected with,

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Speaker 1: But there were three people in particular that I truly

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Speaker 1: believe will be lifelong connections because we just when you

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Speaker 1: go to a space. First of all, when you go

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Speaker 1: to a week long meditation retreat where you are meditating

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Speaker 1: potentially for like thirty hours and you're paying money to

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Speaker 1: do that, there's a certain type of person that goes

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Speaker 1: to an experience like that. And so when I went,

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Speaker 1: because I was one of those people that went right,

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Speaker 1: I saw other people like me who valued that type

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Speaker 1: of experience. And so there's a certain level of connection

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Speaker 1: that we had because of that experience, but also because

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Speaker 1: of our interests. So when I met these people, we

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Speaker 1: all had read some of the same books, we were

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Speaker 1: all into the wu Wu spiritual stuff. So there's so

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Speaker 1: many deep connections that I made there, and these are

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Speaker 1: truly lifelong friends that I believe I'll be connected with,

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Speaker 1: like I still text them to this day, and this

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Speaker 1: is almost a year ago. So that was just one

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Speaker 1: example for me where I went somewhere where I loved

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Speaker 1: to do that type of work and I met my people.

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Speaker 1: What do you think about this tip down?

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Speaker 2: I love that example and because it provides precisely what

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Speaker 2: we're talking about with this particular tip right that, And

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Speaker 2: I tell the students that I work with all the

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Speaker 2: time when you were trying to find You're on this

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Speaker 2: huge college campus and you're saying that you are struggling

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Speaker 2: to find friends or you're having a difficult time making friends. Okay, well,

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Speaker 2: what spaces are you in in? At most universities, not all,

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Speaker 2: but at most universities there is something literally for everybody,

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Speaker 2: and if not, most universities give you the space to

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Speaker 2: create it. Create it and they will come. I think

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Speaker 2: about when I was in college, one of my good

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Speaker 2: friends he saw a group that a need for a

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Speaker 2: group that wasn't there yet. He created it and all

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Speaker 2: of a sudden people were there, right and so, and

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Speaker 2: I know that that's like similar to that kind of

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Speaker 2: touches on one of our other tips that will get

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Speaker 2: into later. But I think part of what it is

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Speaker 2: is that I think about the joy that he got

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Speaker 2: out of starting this group, and I when I'm talking

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Speaker 2: to students, I'm encouraging them identify what are the things

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Speaker 2: that you love doing. I have a number of students

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Speaker 2: who are like.

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Speaker 3: I like.

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Speaker 2: Anime, yes, or I like K dramas okay, so to

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Speaker 2: be and they feel like there's like some stereotype or

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Speaker 2: some stigma around being black and liking anime or being

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Speaker 2: black and liking K dramas. I guarantee you there are

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Speaker 2: people out there black folks who enjoy those things. Look

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Speaker 2: it up. And when you connect with people who have

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Speaker 2: that shared interest something that you truly love doing, typically,

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Speaker 2: like you pointed out, you'll be able to form deeper

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Speaker 2: bonds and there will be other things that you are

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Speaker 2: also connected on.

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Speaker 1: I love it.

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Speaker 2: So then that takes us to our second tip, reconnecting

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Speaker 2: with someone from your past.

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Speaker 1: Was gonna say, sometimes there's a little paw though that

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Speaker 1: on real life.

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Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, yeah, we gotta have a caveat for that. Okay, yeah, okay,

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Speaker 2: all right, So in terms of building community and reconnecting

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Speaker 2: with someone from your past, let's make sure that this

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Speaker 2: is a healthy connection. Okay, we're not trying to circle

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Speaker 2: the block on something that we know did not end

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Speaker 2: well for us, was not good for our overall well being. Right,

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Speaker 2: when we say reconnect with someone from your past, what

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Speaker 2: we truly mean is there's a friend that you had

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Speaker 2: from another phase in life, another location, another city that

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Speaker 2: you lived in, something another part, another time. The friendship

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Speaker 2: didn't end on bad terms. You all just drifted apart.

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Speaker 2: Sometimes all it takes is a hey, haven't heard from

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Speaker 2: you in a while. How are you to rekindle? We

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Speaker 2: connect with what was once a beautiful friendship.

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Speaker 1: That or an acquaintanceship. Tom, I think about there's a

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Speaker 1: guy that I knew in high school and he wasn't

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Speaker 1: really into fitness then, but he's into fitness now, and

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Speaker 1: so we've been like I'm into fitness as well, and

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Speaker 1: so he's been watching my fitness journey, I'm watching his,

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Speaker 1: And even though we live far away, I messaged him like, Hey,

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Speaker 1: he's balked up a lot, and I'm like, I need

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Speaker 1: some tips. I'm still trying to do my bulk. I'm

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Speaker 1: in the balking season. And so he gave me some

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Speaker 1: of his mail plan options and protein options. And so

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Speaker 1: when you gave that example, what made me think of

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Speaker 1: something like that where it's like it may have been

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Speaker 1: a friend or an acquaintance or someone that you just

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Speaker 1: knew of. But if you you know, social media is

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Speaker 1: a great place to see what people are up to.

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Speaker 1: You can see what someone's into, see if they have

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Speaker 1: common interests, and initiate the conversation. Sometimes the best connection

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Speaker 1: is so when you already know and a simple you

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Speaker 1: said I haven't heard of you, or hey, I thought

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Speaker 1: about you, it can restart a whole friendship. And because

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Speaker 1: we grow many people grow and evolve so much, you

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Speaker 1: never know what they might be into now and how

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Speaker 1: you all might be more aligned. And so don't overthink it.

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Speaker 1: Just send a message and do something. Honestly, if you're

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Speaker 1: listening to this episode right now, you obviously are because

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Speaker 1: you hear our voices. Pause the episode and send a text,

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Speaker 1: send a message to someone, reach out, do something that

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Speaker 1: you wouldn't do normally to start building that connection. Because

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Speaker 1: it literally just takes that one interaction. You never know

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Speaker 1: what can come from that. Yes, yes, all right, let's

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Speaker 1: move on to number three. So number three is try

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Speaker 1: something new, even if it feels awkward. Listen. The most

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Speaker 1: aligned people are often waiting just outside your comfort zone.

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Speaker 1: I'm trying to think of something I may have done

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Speaker 1: that's like new, we're out of the box. Recently, I

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Speaker 1: think one was like going to the studio to record

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Speaker 1: a song because I used to write music when I

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Speaker 1: was younger, So that's something I'm thinking of. I met

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Speaker 1: a really cool engineer when I was there. I'm thinking

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Speaker 1: of like solo trips, group retreats, healing wellness, or creativity retreat.

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Speaker 1: I don't know. Messaging someone online. I feel like there

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Speaker 1: are so many people. There are a lot of women

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Speaker 1: that I'll see online and they have, you know, a

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Speaker 1: random picture that's cute. I'm like, hey, are so cute,

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Speaker 1: just connecting, and there's this one woman in particular. We

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Speaker 1: comment on each other's stuff all the time, and so

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Speaker 1: we talked about doing a live stream at some point

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Speaker 1: because I just feel like we have similar energy, Like

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Speaker 1: we just got that vibe. So listen, ay something new,

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Speaker 1: even if it's awkward, even if you're uncomfortable, just go

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Speaker 1: do with y'all.

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Speaker 2: You know. I think oftentimes what I can think about

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Speaker 2: from personal experience when it comes to trying new things. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: even if it feels awkward, is that the awkwardness is

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Speaker 2: mostly like in our head right, that it's us overthinking

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Speaker 2: it and that once you actually get in there and

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Speaker 2: you do it, it's fine, yes, and so so for me,

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Speaker 2: it's motive having the affirmations of like to help get

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Speaker 2: me through that initial what can feel awkward to the

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Speaker 2: zone of actually doing, because then the awkwardness goes away

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Speaker 2: exactly now, speaking of awkward things, when you are feeling

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Speaker 2: awkward when you're trying something new. See, I know you

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Speaker 2: gave the example of going to the recording studio, but

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Speaker 2: you also did something else new. You recently created a

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Speaker 2: field account.

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Speaker 1: So I did. I did? Yes, y'all. Let me tell

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Speaker 1: you about field Okay. So I'm newly single, and while

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Speaker 1: I'm open to dating, I'm also really craving intentional connections.

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Speaker 1: I feel like I'm in a space where I'm building

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Speaker 1: a community literally of people who share my values, want

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Speaker 1: to explore or just want to vibe on the same frequency.

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Speaker 1: And that look like brunch meditation obviously, or even like

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Speaker 1: a pottery class. Like I'm just down for like new experiences,

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Speaker 1: you know. So, yes, I did create a field account.

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Speaker 2: Okay. Okay, So this, this field account sounds like it's

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Speaker 2: giving soft life with options.

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Speaker 3: Hmm.

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Speaker 2: Okay, But what makes feel different from dating apps?

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Speaker 1: Okay, I'm got to write that down. I like that

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Speaker 1: soft life with the options. Yes. Well, first of all,

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Speaker 1: there's no algorithmic gatekeeping, right, so you have a full

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Speaker 1: control over your experience and there's no pressure to swipe,

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Speaker 1: which I love. Also, I really love the fact that

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Speaker 1: you can go back if you skip someone. And although

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Speaker 1: although it's a new experience for me, like one of

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Speaker 1: the things that really stands out so far is the

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Speaker 1: fact that people are so transparent, and I feel like

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Speaker 1: I did not see that in other spaces when I

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Speaker 1: was trying to build community. It was just either focused

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Speaker 1: on one thing or another, and most of the times

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Speaker 1: I was like, I'm not that's not what I'm into.

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Speaker 1: So what I noticed is people are upfront about their

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Speaker 1: relationship styles, what they're into, what kind of connection they're

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Speaker 1: looking for. And so there's no wasted time on guest work,

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Speaker 1: which I love because time is money and I don't

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Speaker 1: got time to be wasting, so.

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Speaker 2: Nobody got time to be wasting. So a space where

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Speaker 2: people are actually honest, all right, now you know that? Yeah,

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Speaker 2: all right, I'm here, go.

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Speaker 1: See I'm listening.

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Speaker 2: Yep.

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Speaker 1: I gave you an example right before we before we

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Speaker 1: signed on I remember.

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Speaker 2: You did, you did, and I appreciated that way.

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Speaker 1: But listening, y'all, Field isn't just for dating. It's a

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Speaker 1: place where you can explore your desires, whether it's open relationships, cuddling, polyamory,

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Speaker 1: or just meeting new people who get you. You can

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Speaker 1: even link profiles with friends or partners using the Constellation Future,

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Speaker 1: which I think is so cool, so that way your

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Speaker 1: connections are grounded in your existing community.

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Speaker 2: Okay, Okay, I'm loving this.

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Speaker 1: I'm so far.

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Speaker 2: I'm loving this. And it sounds like there's also like

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Speaker 2: room for growth. So if you, let's say you start

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Speaker 2: off with one intention, you can change that intention of

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Speaker 2: like why you're on the app.

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Speaker 1: Yes, dom you can change your intention. So literally, sixty

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Speaker 1: two percent of Field members actually evolve their sexuality, desires

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Speaker 1: or interest within their first year on the app. So

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Speaker 1: it's a space where change is normal and welcomed.

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Speaker 2: All right, lady. So I'm hearing this and I want

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Speaker 2: to know more so, and I'm sure there are other

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Speaker 2: folks out there that listening, and they're like, all right, well,

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Speaker 2: where do we download this magic energy?

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Speaker 1: Yes, I got you, I got you, So go download Field.

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Speaker 1: That's fee l D on the App Store or Google Play.

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Speaker 1: If you're feeling curious or ready to explore deeper connections,

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Speaker 1: this is the place to start. And if you see

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Speaker 1: my profile, stop buy and say hi.

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Speaker 2: Okay, all right, y'all, So yes, definitely check it out

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Speaker 2: and let us know what kind of connection you're calling in. Remember,

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Speaker 2: try something new, even if it feels a little awkward.

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Speaker 1: Okay, listen. And that takes us right on to number four,

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Speaker 1: which is start something small but intentional. Community doesn't have

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Speaker 1: to be a big production. Start where you are, and

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Speaker 1: might honestly think back to when we started this podcast

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Speaker 1: seven years ago, like we literally, I mean I was

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Speaker 1: reflecting one it the other day, Like we literally met

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Speaker 1: at the conference like oh cool, it's another cool black woman.

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Speaker 1: Let's get lunch or dinner and went to dinner and

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Speaker 1: was like, let's do something for our community. And we

434
00:25:43,880 --> 00:25:49,000
Speaker 1: started with one episode, one vision, one listener, and now

435
00:25:49,160 --> 00:25:52,080
Speaker 1: millions of you know listeners later, and all the success

436
00:25:52,160 --> 00:25:54,840
Speaker 1: we've had. It started with the idea and the intention,

437
00:25:54,960 --> 00:25:56,720
Speaker 1: and we weren't waiting for someone else to do it.

438
00:25:56,760 --> 00:25:59,320
Speaker 1: Like you said, with your friend in college, he saw

439
00:25:59,440 --> 00:26:02,000
Speaker 1: a void and he feel that boy, So again, doesn't

440
00:26:02,040 --> 00:26:03,359
Speaker 1: need to be a big production. It can be a

441
00:26:03,359 --> 00:26:06,600
Speaker 1: group chat. It can be a curated community at your

442
00:26:06,640 --> 00:26:10,040
Speaker 1: home or in your community center or center at a park. Y'all, Okay,

443
00:26:10,320 --> 00:26:13,280
Speaker 1: start a pot look or a Sunday walk. That's more

444
00:26:13,320 --> 00:26:16,600
Speaker 1: than enough. Sometimes the best spaces are the ones you

445
00:26:16,640 --> 00:26:17,440
Speaker 1: create yourself.

446
00:26:18,560 --> 00:26:22,760
Speaker 2: Oh oh okay, I love that, all right? Yes, yes,

447
00:26:23,600 --> 00:26:29,679
Speaker 2: so starting small but intentional. Yes, I'm like, I like

448
00:26:29,760 --> 00:26:33,879
Speaker 2: this idea of that it doesn't have to be on

449
00:26:33,920 --> 00:26:37,159
Speaker 2: a grand scale because I think oftentimes that's what slows

450
00:26:37,200 --> 00:26:40,320
Speaker 2: us down, that's what stops us from wanting to take

451
00:26:40,359 --> 00:26:48,560
Speaker 2: that step. And community really could be that coworker that

452
00:26:49,080 --> 00:26:51,399
Speaker 2: you and I say coworker, but it could be the

453
00:26:51,440 --> 00:26:55,520
Speaker 2: person who you see it getting coffee every morning on

454
00:26:55,560 --> 00:27:00,520
Speaker 2: the first floor of your high rise office building. Y'all

455
00:27:00,520 --> 00:27:04,320
Speaker 2: go in, you end up ordering the same type of drink. Well,

456
00:27:04,480 --> 00:27:06,560
Speaker 2: maybe there's other things that you have in common if

457
00:27:06,600 --> 00:27:10,760
Speaker 2: you're ordering the same drink every day. So, but be

458
00:27:10,880 --> 00:27:15,080
Speaker 2: intentional about striking up a conversation, right, And I think

459
00:27:15,200 --> 00:27:21,240
Speaker 2: that example leads us right into tip number five, which

460
00:27:21,280 --> 00:27:25,840
Speaker 2: is be the person who reaches out first. I get it,

461
00:27:26,760 --> 00:27:31,600
Speaker 2: we've already said that trying something new could be awkward,

462
00:27:32,280 --> 00:27:37,080
Speaker 2: but the benefit of being the person who reaches out

463
00:27:37,080 --> 00:27:44,840
Speaker 2: first means that you are starting that connection because oftentimes

464
00:27:45,680 --> 00:27:49,320
Speaker 2: I keep referencing the college students that I work with

465
00:27:49,400 --> 00:27:54,680
Speaker 2: because I see this struggle with finding community a lot

466
00:27:55,200 --> 00:27:59,840
Speaker 2: with college students. So when you are you while you're

467
00:28:01,880 --> 00:28:06,399
Speaker 2: on someone to invite you to the event, you're missing

468
00:28:06,440 --> 00:28:11,240
Speaker 2: out on that event because they might be feeling similarly.

469
00:28:12,440 --> 00:28:16,199
Speaker 2: They might be thinking, oh, Terry looks like cool people,

470
00:28:16,800 --> 00:28:21,359
Speaker 2: but I'm scared to say something, so I'm gonna just

471
00:28:21,400 --> 00:28:27,240
Speaker 2: wait for her to say something now, I'm be honest.

472
00:28:27,560 --> 00:28:30,520
Speaker 2: I think it makes me think back to college, and

473
00:28:31,920 --> 00:28:34,160
Speaker 2: I was a lot like that. I was a lot

474
00:28:34,200 --> 00:28:38,400
Speaker 2: like that person who didn't reach out first, didn't take

475
00:28:38,440 --> 00:28:42,240
Speaker 2: the first step. And I remember one of my good

476
00:28:42,320 --> 00:28:44,360
Speaker 2: friends like and I say good friends because we were

477
00:28:44,360 --> 00:28:49,200
Speaker 2: still friends to this day. We were in psychology class.

478
00:28:49,240 --> 00:28:56,680
Speaker 2: This was first semester freshman year, and she initiated a

479
00:28:56,720 --> 00:28:59,760
Speaker 2: conversation with me after I don't remember if it was

480
00:28:59,840 --> 00:29:02,680
Speaker 2: the first week or I know, I don't think it

481
00:29:02,720 --> 00:29:04,440
Speaker 2: was the first day. Hell, it might have been the

482
00:29:04,480 --> 00:29:06,400
Speaker 2: first day. All I know is it was very early

483
00:29:06,480 --> 00:29:11,960
Speaker 2: on and she was the first person to say something

484
00:29:12,000 --> 00:29:16,480
Speaker 2: to me, and we are still friends to this day. Now.

485
00:29:17,280 --> 00:29:22,200
Speaker 2: I don't know at what point, because that semester we

486
00:29:22,240 --> 00:29:25,320
Speaker 2: had the majority of our classes together because we're both

487
00:29:25,360 --> 00:29:29,880
Speaker 2: psych majors, so I don't know at what point we

488
00:29:29,920 --> 00:29:35,840
Speaker 2: would have eventually connected. But she took that first step

489
00:29:36,200 --> 00:29:39,840
Speaker 2: to reach out and say, hey, another black chick in

490
00:29:39,840 --> 00:29:46,600
Speaker 2: the psychology class, like what's up and so, and it's

491
00:29:46,640 --> 00:29:52,000
Speaker 2: again it's led to this friendship twenty plus years later.

492
00:29:52,800 --> 00:29:55,000
Speaker 1: I love that example. Domin I have a similar one,

493
00:29:55,000 --> 00:29:56,560
Speaker 1: and I just wanted to say I think that because

494
00:29:56,600 --> 00:29:58,000
Speaker 1: I was that person too where I didn't want to

495
00:29:58,000 --> 00:30:01,240
Speaker 1: reach out because oftentimes, for me, it was me overthinking it.

496
00:30:01,240 --> 00:30:03,160
Speaker 1: It was me having the fear of rejection, me not

497
00:30:03,240 --> 00:30:05,600
Speaker 1: wanting to be awkward. So what I've done over the

498
00:30:05,680 --> 00:30:07,480
Speaker 1: years is I pushed myself to do that and just

499
00:30:07,520 --> 00:30:09,920
Speaker 1: embrace the awkwardness. Like today, I was walking in the

500
00:30:09,920 --> 00:30:12,080
Speaker 1: hallway and saw someone and I spoke and they didn't

501
00:30:12,080 --> 00:30:13,920
Speaker 1: say anything. In my mind, I was like, okay, like

502
00:30:13,960 --> 00:30:15,440
Speaker 1: they might be having a bad day, Like keep it

503
00:30:15,480 --> 00:30:19,040
Speaker 1: pushing versus taking it personally. Then I saw another black

504
00:30:19,080 --> 00:30:21,600
Speaker 1: woman who was working out in the gym and we

505
00:30:21,600 --> 00:30:24,760
Speaker 1: looked around the same age, and I was like, oh,

506
00:30:24,800 --> 00:30:26,800
Speaker 1: I don't usually see a black woman in this space,

507
00:30:26,840 --> 00:30:28,040
Speaker 1: like in the you know, the gym that I work

508
00:30:28,080 --> 00:30:30,360
Speaker 1: out in. So I literally she had her headphones and y'all,

509
00:30:30,400 --> 00:30:31,920
Speaker 1: you know, you're not supposed to interrupt people where they're

510
00:30:31,920 --> 00:30:34,000
Speaker 1: working out, but she had stopped her set. So I

511
00:30:34,040 --> 00:30:35,600
Speaker 1: went over and I just waved and I was like, hey,

512
00:30:35,640 --> 00:30:37,640
Speaker 1: I was like, I don't usually see a black woman here,

513
00:30:37,720 --> 00:30:39,760
Speaker 1: so good to see you here, lady, Like, you know,

514
00:30:39,760 --> 00:30:42,360
Speaker 1: I hope you're having a good workout whatever, and then

515
00:30:42,440 --> 00:30:44,000
Speaker 1: we ended up. She ended up telling me that she

516
00:30:44,200 --> 00:30:48,000
Speaker 1: is a step aerobics instructor and so she invited me

517
00:30:48,040 --> 00:30:50,920
Speaker 1: to this event that she has on Saturdays, and so

518
00:30:50,960 --> 00:30:53,040
Speaker 1: now I'm going to go support her. So we exchange information,

519
00:30:53,520 --> 00:30:54,880
Speaker 1: and I was like, if I never would have reached

520
00:30:54,880 --> 00:30:56,440
Speaker 1: out to her or said something, I would have never

521
00:30:56,480 --> 00:30:58,040
Speaker 1: made that connection. And I don't know what's going to

522
00:30:58,120 --> 00:31:00,520
Speaker 1: come from that. So I think for me, me not

523
00:31:00,560 --> 00:31:02,920
Speaker 1: taking myself too seriously, like just being like, let's just

524
00:31:02,960 --> 00:31:05,840
Speaker 1: see what happens, and if the person's rude, now you know, okay,

525
00:31:05,840 --> 00:31:07,360
Speaker 1: they probably aren't going to be a good fit for

526
00:31:07,400 --> 00:31:09,719
Speaker 1: my community, but you never know until you leap out

527
00:31:09,840 --> 00:31:12,800
Speaker 1: and you try, so shoot your shot. Okay, friendship style,

528
00:31:13,040 --> 00:31:17,320
Speaker 1: all right, community style, Okay, y'all. So I guess I

529
00:31:17,360 --> 00:31:21,239
Speaker 1: take this to number six now already? Yes, okay. So

530
00:31:21,320 --> 00:31:27,160
Speaker 1: number six is build connection in your rhythm. Okay, Now,

531
00:31:27,160 --> 00:31:30,000
Speaker 1: this is an important one. If you want community, you

532
00:31:30,120 --> 00:31:31,920
Speaker 1: have to make room for it. There are so many

533
00:31:31,920 --> 00:31:34,840
Speaker 1: times where I've heard people like, I want friends, I

534
00:31:34,960 --> 00:31:36,840
Speaker 1: want a best do y'all want this? But it's like,

535
00:31:37,080 --> 00:31:40,280
Speaker 1: let's be realistic. This is why the soulful connection checking

536
00:31:40,360 --> 00:31:43,920
Speaker 1: is so important because it talks about what you have

537
00:31:44,000 --> 00:31:46,360
Speaker 1: the capacity for. It helps you reflect on in this

538
00:31:46,400 --> 00:31:49,360
Speaker 1: season of your life, what you truly have the capacity for,

539
00:31:49,920 --> 00:31:52,600
Speaker 1: And I think that doing that gives you a realistic,

540
00:31:53,760 --> 00:31:58,280
Speaker 1: a realistic state of mind on like what's available, what's

541
00:31:58,320 --> 00:32:00,120
Speaker 1: suitable for you right now? Because you may not be

542
00:32:00,200 --> 00:32:02,240
Speaker 1: in a space where you have it to give to

543
00:32:02,280 --> 00:32:04,480
Speaker 1: a friendship right You may be in a space where

544
00:32:04,480 --> 00:32:07,080
Speaker 1: you know what, I can only do text and voice notes.

545
00:32:07,440 --> 00:32:09,080
Speaker 1: I may not be able to do FaceTime right now.

546
00:32:09,120 --> 00:32:09,280
Speaker 2: Right.

547
00:32:09,320 --> 00:32:11,200
Speaker 1: I know I've been in seasons like that too, And

548
00:32:11,240 --> 00:32:13,840
Speaker 1: so when you build it, it becomes a natural part

549
00:32:13,880 --> 00:32:15,400
Speaker 1: of your life. So figure out what you have the

550
00:32:15,440 --> 00:32:18,560
Speaker 1: capacity for and make connection part of your lifestyle, not

551
00:32:18,600 --> 00:32:21,280
Speaker 1: just something you do when you're lonely. Be constantly building

552
00:32:21,280 --> 00:32:23,760
Speaker 1: that community so that you have people. I like to

553
00:32:23,800 --> 00:32:26,240
Speaker 1: have people in different sort of areas of life that

554
00:32:26,320 --> 00:32:28,160
Speaker 1: I can talk to about different things. So it's like

555
00:32:28,200 --> 00:32:33,480
Speaker 1: diversifying your network. So my meditation people, my dating people,

556
00:32:33,640 --> 00:32:35,520
Speaker 1: it's like we go over the dating tea, right, and

557
00:32:35,520 --> 00:32:38,480
Speaker 1: then other friends for different things. So build your community

558
00:32:38,560 --> 00:32:41,720
Speaker 1: so you feel like you're connected, you're seeing you're valued,

559
00:32:41,760 --> 00:32:42,520
Speaker 1: and you're supported.

560
00:32:44,280 --> 00:32:47,200
Speaker 2: And I think you know to that point, I think

561
00:32:47,240 --> 00:32:53,200
Speaker 2: it's important to make note that how you spend your

562
00:32:53,240 --> 00:33:00,400
Speaker 2: time allows you to think about what where your value are,

563
00:33:01,440 --> 00:33:07,240
Speaker 2: what's important to you. So if you are in a

564
00:33:07,320 --> 00:33:14,200
Speaker 2: space where your behavior isn't matching what your values are,

565
00:33:14,800 --> 00:33:18,440
Speaker 2: it's an opportunity to realign. So if you're saying, okay,

566
00:33:19,080 --> 00:33:23,320
Speaker 2: I am looking for like, I want to build community.

567
00:33:23,840 --> 00:33:30,680
Speaker 2: I need to build community, then okay, then make time

568
00:33:31,040 --> 00:33:39,320
Speaker 2: for it. Make sure that you are allocating certain times,

569
00:33:39,320 --> 00:33:41,880
Speaker 2: certain a certain amount of time within the course of

570
00:33:42,080 --> 00:33:47,520
Speaker 2: every day for fostering connection. Again, that doesn't I mean

571
00:33:47,560 --> 00:33:49,480
Speaker 2: and I want to be clear, that doesn't mean that

572
00:33:51,200 --> 00:33:54,520
Speaker 2: I have to set aside three hours every day to

573
00:33:54,640 --> 00:33:59,320
Speaker 2: doing something with community. No, be realistic with it, looking

574
00:33:59,360 --> 00:34:03,040
Speaker 2: at your life, looking at your general flow. This is

575
00:34:03,040 --> 00:34:07,320
Speaker 2: what we mean by building the connection into your rhythm.

576
00:34:07,800 --> 00:34:13,600
Speaker 2: If you know that you're someone who likes to be

577
00:34:13,840 --> 00:34:19,600
Speaker 2: all in focused, zoned in on work Monday through Friday,

578
00:34:19,800 --> 00:34:26,680
Speaker 2: then okay, zone in on work Monday through Friday. Maybe

579
00:34:26,760 --> 00:34:30,360
Speaker 2: what that means is part of your Monday through Friday

580
00:34:30,520 --> 00:34:35,200
Speaker 2: is building community with people that you work with. Because

581
00:34:35,239 --> 00:34:37,640
Speaker 2: that's five days out of your week. That is a

582
00:34:37,719 --> 00:34:43,200
Speaker 2: lot of time spent in one area, and then Saturday

583
00:34:43,200 --> 00:34:46,600
Speaker 2: and Sunday, depending on what you choose to do with

584
00:34:46,640 --> 00:34:50,480
Speaker 2: your time on Saturday and Sunday. Your community is built

585
00:34:50,520 --> 00:34:55,719
Speaker 2: in based on those things, and so it's about finding

586
00:34:55,880 --> 00:35:03,040
Speaker 2: ways to make it truly work for your lifestyle, your values, and.

587
00:35:03,080 --> 00:35:05,160
Speaker 1: Tom we didn't really talk about online community. So I

588
00:35:05,200 --> 00:35:06,440
Speaker 1: just want to put like a little note in there

589
00:35:06,440 --> 00:35:08,759
Speaker 1: about online communities because that can really make you feel

590
00:35:08,800 --> 00:35:11,319
Speaker 1: super connected as well if you're not in a space

591
00:35:11,320 --> 00:35:13,160
Speaker 1: where you're able to meet people in person. Lady, I

592
00:35:13,200 --> 00:35:15,279
Speaker 1: know we've had plenty of women reach out to us

593
00:35:15,280 --> 00:35:17,400
Speaker 1: on the podcast that say like, hey, I'm in this

594
00:35:17,480 --> 00:35:20,319
Speaker 1: predominantly white space or this predominantly x space where there's

595
00:35:20,320 --> 00:35:22,560
Speaker 1: not a lot of people that look like me. Well,

596
00:35:22,920 --> 00:35:25,239
Speaker 1: maybe in that season you may be leaning into like

597
00:35:25,239 --> 00:35:28,480
Speaker 1: an online community instead of a physical community based on

598
00:35:28,520 --> 00:35:30,560
Speaker 1: where you are right now. So don't forget those as well.

599
00:35:31,680 --> 00:35:33,920
Speaker 2: I like that point because what that also what that

600
00:35:34,040 --> 00:35:39,440
Speaker 2: also allows room for is it's what it's saying is

601
00:35:39,480 --> 00:35:43,960
Speaker 2: that we don't have to be limited by our geographical

602
00:35:44,040 --> 00:35:53,960
Speaker 2: physical location. Right that. Let's say that I am the

603
00:35:54,080 --> 00:35:59,800
Speaker 2: only person in my city that does one specific type

604
00:35:59,880 --> 00:36:04,960
Speaker 2: of yoga. I don't know, I'm just pulling an example

605
00:36:05,000 --> 00:36:08,040
Speaker 2: out then there. Right now, I'm the only person in

606
00:36:08,040 --> 00:36:11,759
Speaker 2: my city that I'm aware of, who does this specific

607
00:36:11,800 --> 00:36:14,200
Speaker 2: type of yoga. But I want to build community around

608
00:36:14,239 --> 00:36:17,799
Speaker 2: this activity because this activity is really important to me.

609
00:36:19,080 --> 00:36:22,880
Speaker 2: Let me highlight the internet, because it could be that

610
00:36:23,080 --> 00:36:29,520
Speaker 2: by looking online, I might find that not only was

611
00:36:29,520 --> 00:36:31,560
Speaker 2: I wrong about being the only person in my area

612
00:36:31,600 --> 00:36:36,600
Speaker 2: who does this specific type of yoga, but it may

613
00:36:36,680 --> 00:36:40,160
Speaker 2: allow me to connect with people all over the world.

614
00:36:42,320 --> 00:36:49,200
Speaker 2: And so I'm building community across the world, which also

615
00:36:49,360 --> 00:36:56,799
Speaker 2: allows me to learn about other people, other cultures, other spaces,

616
00:36:56,840 --> 00:37:01,040
Speaker 2: and so, lady, that takes us to our final tip. Now,

617
00:37:01,080 --> 00:37:03,759
Speaker 2: this one will sound counterintuitive, so I need you to

618
00:37:03,800 --> 00:37:07,440
Speaker 2: hear me out. Don't shut down after you hear the

619
00:37:07,480 --> 00:37:15,960
Speaker 2: actual tip. Okay, don't underestimate the power of one. All right,

620
00:37:15,960 --> 00:37:20,160
Speaker 2: all right, I'm gonna say that again. Don't underestimate the

621
00:37:20,320 --> 00:37:24,799
Speaker 2: power of one. Now, lady, I know you hear that,

622
00:37:25,480 --> 00:37:29,640
Speaker 2: and you're thinking, we done spent this whole episode talking

623
00:37:29,680 --> 00:37:35,760
Speaker 2: about building community. What are they talking about? Power of one?

624
00:37:35,920 --> 00:37:39,799
Speaker 2: Like one person that defeats the whole purpose? All right?

625
00:37:40,120 --> 00:37:42,560
Speaker 2: That is that's not how we want you to take this.

626
00:37:42,680 --> 00:37:43,000
Speaker 1: Okay.

627
00:37:44,320 --> 00:37:51,440
Speaker 2: Sometimes in building community, community is not at doesn't have

628
00:37:51,560 --> 00:38:00,720
Speaker 2: to be about having a huge circle. To have community.

629
00:38:00,840 --> 00:38:04,879
Speaker 2: You need one person, that's all. You need one other

630
00:38:04,960 --> 00:38:10,400
Speaker 2: person to build community. I think this also ties back

631
00:38:10,440 --> 00:38:16,920
Speaker 2: to starting small. That you have that one person that

632
00:38:16,960 --> 00:38:23,120
Speaker 2: you all are aligned in your mission, aligned in this

633
00:38:23,239 --> 00:38:31,120
Speaker 2: particular activity or interest, and going back to our quote

634
00:38:31,120 --> 00:38:36,720
Speaker 2: of the day, the connection that you have that shared

635
00:38:36,880 --> 00:38:40,279
Speaker 2: interest and spending time doing that shared interest just the

636
00:38:40,320 --> 00:38:44,480
Speaker 2: two of you, you feel that sense of belonging and

637
00:38:44,560 --> 00:38:45,920
Speaker 2: that's what matters.

638
00:38:47,400 --> 00:38:50,440
Speaker 1: Yes, that is so powerful, and I just want to

639
00:38:50,440 --> 00:38:52,920
Speaker 1: say also, like, lady, no matter how lonely you are

640
00:38:53,000 --> 00:38:55,080
Speaker 1: right now, there are people in the world who are

641
00:38:55,160 --> 00:38:58,359
Speaker 1: like you. Okay, you are not the only one, and

642
00:38:58,440 --> 00:39:01,880
Speaker 1: there are people there who are waiting to love on you,

643
00:39:02,040 --> 00:39:04,560
Speaker 1: support you, and see you for who you are. And

644
00:39:04,560 --> 00:39:06,440
Speaker 1: so even though you may not see that right now,

645
00:39:06,920 --> 00:39:08,400
Speaker 1: just know that you're not alone, because I know there

646
00:39:08,480 --> 00:39:09,960
Speaker 1: have been so many times in my life where I

647
00:39:10,000 --> 00:39:12,399
Speaker 1: was like, oh, I'm the only one going through this thing,

648
00:39:12,520 --> 00:39:14,040
Speaker 1: or like no one sees me or gets me. And

649
00:39:14,320 --> 00:39:16,520
Speaker 1: you're not to minimize your feelings. You may actually feel

650
00:39:16,520 --> 00:39:19,560
Speaker 1: that way right now, and that is absolutely valid. And

651
00:39:19,640 --> 00:39:22,280
Speaker 1: I think that the more that we can explore, open

652
00:39:22,280 --> 00:39:26,040
Speaker 1: ourselves up, and just try our best to attract things

653
00:39:26,080 --> 00:39:28,520
Speaker 1: that we're desiring, you will see that there are more

654
00:39:28,520 --> 00:39:30,080
Speaker 1: people out there that are like you. You don't need a

655
00:39:30,080 --> 00:39:33,399
Speaker 1: whole crew, Like God was saying, one aligned connection can

656
00:39:33,480 --> 00:39:37,120
Speaker 1: change everything, and it's so it's so beautiful when you

657
00:39:37,200 --> 00:39:39,520
Speaker 1: do have those people that get you. So be sure

658
00:39:39,520 --> 00:39:42,839
Speaker 1: to go deep and o wide. One soulful connection is

659
00:39:42,880 --> 00:39:46,920
Speaker 1: better than ten surface connections. So start with one. Let

660
00:39:46,920 --> 00:39:49,040
Speaker 1: it grow from there, because usually that one person you're

661
00:39:49,040 --> 00:39:51,240
Speaker 1: connected to that gets you or you all have that connection,

662
00:39:51,520 --> 00:39:53,719
Speaker 1: they likely have other people that are similar to them,

663
00:39:53,760 --> 00:39:56,480
Speaker 1: and you all might be able to build on that community.

664
00:39:56,480 --> 00:39:59,399
Speaker 1: So be sure to do that and be intentional, right,

665
00:40:00,080 --> 00:40:02,800
Speaker 1: intentional with who you're looking for, how you're spending your time,

666
00:40:03,160 --> 00:40:06,719
Speaker 1: and be mindful of the soulful connection. Check in that.

667
00:40:06,840 --> 00:40:08,960
Speaker 1: Domini are actually going to dive into a bit deeper

668
00:40:09,520 --> 00:40:12,839
Speaker 1: and just a bit Yeah, yeah, so we're gonna jump.

669
00:40:12,880 --> 00:40:13,920
Speaker 1: We're going to jump into that.

670
00:40:14,680 --> 00:40:18,040
Speaker 2: But let's let's first let's recap these seven tips for

671
00:40:18,200 --> 00:40:23,000
Speaker 2: how to build and deepen your community. Number one, join

672
00:40:23,200 --> 00:40:27,200
Speaker 2: something you genuinely love. Don't be doing it out there

673
00:40:27,200 --> 00:40:29,440
Speaker 2: because you see the person and then you think they attractive.

674
00:40:29,960 --> 00:40:36,560
Speaker 2: Do it because you genuinely love it. Number two. Reconnect

675
00:40:36,600 --> 00:40:43,560
Speaker 2: with someone from your past. Number three, Try something new,

676
00:40:44,239 --> 00:40:51,280
Speaker 2: even if it feels awkward. Number four, start something small

677
00:40:51,480 --> 00:40:59,240
Speaker 2: but intentional. Number five be the person who reaches out first.

678
00:41:01,160 --> 00:41:08,480
Speaker 2: Number six build connection into your rhythm. And number seven,

679
00:41:09,600 --> 00:41:11,520
Speaker 2: I'm gonna let y'all stay with that for a second.

680
00:41:14,320 --> 00:41:19,239
Speaker 2: Don't underestimate the power of one.

681
00:41:19,440 --> 00:41:21,360
Speaker 1: There we go, all right, ladies, So we are going

682
00:41:21,440 --> 00:41:22,920
Speaker 1: to head on over to the after show and do

683
00:41:23,000 --> 00:41:26,000
Speaker 1: a deep dive into the Soulful Connection check in or

684
00:41:26,080 --> 00:41:28,960
Speaker 1: revisit the sections and go over each of the questions

685
00:41:28,960 --> 00:41:31,840
Speaker 1: within this section. That'll really give you that space and

686
00:41:31,920 --> 00:41:35,279
Speaker 1: time to reflect and be very intentional about what you're

687
00:41:35,280 --> 00:41:38,120
Speaker 1: building and who you're building it for. Of course that

688
00:41:38,360 --> 00:41:41,439
Speaker 1: includes you, so be sure to visit firstpace podcast dot com,

689
00:41:41,440 --> 00:41:43,960
Speaker 1: click on anywhere you see Patreon and come and visit

690
00:41:44,040 --> 00:41:45,400
Speaker 1: us in the after shows. You can see us on

691
00:41:45,480 --> 00:41:48,600
Speaker 1: video and also get the juicy questions for the Soulful

692
00:41:48,600 --> 00:41:51,000
Speaker 1: Connection check in. All right, lady, we'll see you next

693
00:41:51,000 --> 00:41:56,600
Speaker 1: week sat Toime Saint Place. If you're feeling stuck, overwhelmed,

694
00:41:56,719 --> 00:42:01,040
Speaker 1: or unsure of your next steps, this is for you. Hey, lady,

695
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Speaker 1: is Tea here and I just want to invite you

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Speaker 1: to my free goal map like a pro coaching workshop,

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Speaker 1: and achieve your goals. Whether you're feeling overwhelmed by all

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Speaker 1: your ideas, juggling scattered ideas, or maybe you just need

700
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Speaker 1: confidence to start, this workshop will give you the clarity,

701
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Speaker 1: tools and the motivation to take back control. Reserve your

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Speaker 1: clicking on the goal map like a pro webinar link. Lady,

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705
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Speaker 1: your life and set you up for success. I hope

706
00:42:36,560 --> 00:42:37,240
Speaker 1: to see you there.

707
00:42:39,640 --> 00:42:43,680
Speaker 2: Thanks for tuning into Cultivating her Space. Remember that while

708
00:42:43,719 --> 00:42:48,520
Speaker 2: this podcast is all about healing, empowerment, and resilience, it's

709
00:42:48,600 --> 00:42:52,520
Speaker 2: not a substitute for therapy. If you or someone you

710
00:42:52,600 --> 00:42:56,640
Speaker 2: know need support, check out resources like Therapy for Black

711
00:42:56,680 --> 00:43:01,279
Speaker 2: Girls or Psychology Today. If you love today episode, do

712
00:43:01,440 --> 00:43:03,439
Speaker 2: us a favor and share it with a friend who

713
00:43:03,440 --> 00:43:07,960
Speaker 2: needs some inspiration or leave us a quick five star review.

714
00:43:08,600 --> 00:43:11,560
Speaker 2: Your support means the world to us and helps keep

715
00:43:11,680 --> 00:43:12,720
Speaker 2: this space thriving.

716
00:43:13,320 --> 00:43:18,200
Speaker 1: And before we meet again, repeat after me. My actions

717
00:43:18,280 --> 00:43:25,920
Speaker 1: are aligned with purpose leading to continuous transformation. Keep thriving, Lady,

718
00:43:26,080 --> 00:43:30,120
Speaker 1: and tune in next Friday for more inspiration from Cultivating

719
00:43:30,160 --> 00:43:33,200
Speaker 1: her Space. In the meantime, be sure to connect with

720
00:43:33,280 --> 00:43:36,239
Speaker 1: us on Instagram at her Space Podcast