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Speaker 1: So it's me, it's Timberland, and it's at the time

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Speaker 1: Magoo and we're going we're building to be where uh

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Speaker 1: going to beat piece by piece to make a hit,

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Speaker 1: to make a smasher yea, and Magoo uh you know. Uh,

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Speaker 1: he's a natural clown, biggest funny bone in.

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Speaker 2: The biz, and he's clowning. He's cracking this up.

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Speaker 1: And he starts to do his play on the famous

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Speaker 1: Marshall Mavers song intro and he's inverting it and going,

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Speaker 1: there's my snare, there's my snare.

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Speaker 3: I have so much snare in my headphone. Okay, and

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Speaker 3: what's uh huh? He was doing the inversion and what's

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Speaker 3: the normal one?

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Speaker 2: Where's my snare?

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Speaker 3: Oh? And he's saying he knows where it is? He

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Speaker 3: found it. Magoo saying I found the snare. I know

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Speaker 3: where it is.

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Speaker 1: Magoo is doing that and you know, so of course

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Speaker 1: I'm losing it.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, And Kimberland gets.

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Speaker 4: Pass yah yeah, ferocious and he turns and he you know,

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Speaker 4: he carries like a wizard staff sure and.

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Speaker 1: He points the staff mad and banishes Magoo.

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Speaker 3: And did it and Magoo disappears. Oh what did he say?

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Speaker 3: I banished the because usually I've only seen him he

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Speaker 3: uses that to like push the levels, like to change

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Speaker 3: the levels on the board. He stands really far away

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Speaker 3: from the board and he uses the big staff to

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Speaker 3: push them up. He can't really lower them, but he

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Speaker 3: can't experience.

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Speaker 2: That as well.

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Speaker 1: I had seen that that he can push him up.

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Speaker 1: But he I suggested that he put some kind of

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Speaker 1: hook on the end.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, but it's just round and back down. Yeah. But yeah.

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Speaker 3: And so by the end of the record, they just

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Speaker 3: all the levels end up, all the way up. But

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Speaker 3: I now I had all the way up. Yeah.

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Speaker 1: And when I told him to put a hook on

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Speaker 1: the end, I said, you shouldn't have the round top.

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Speaker 3: He said, bruh, Yeah, that's the look. Okay. And did

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Speaker 3: you get the feeling now that you almost got banished

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Speaker 3: in that moment?

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Speaker 1: Well, that's what I'm realizing is I was seconds from

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Speaker 1: being banished. And if you'll notice, Magoo hasn't been on

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Speaker 1: many Timberman tracks since then.

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Speaker 3: And when was.

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Speaker 1: This this was Let's see.

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Speaker 3: It was twenty six right now, and and carried to

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Speaker 3: one and Aliah. We still love ages for a number.

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Speaker 3: It was like a couple of years ago. Hey, welcome

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Speaker 3: to Hollywood Handbook, An insider's guide to kicking butt and

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Speaker 3: dropping names in the red carpet lineback hallways of this

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Speaker 3: industry we call showbiz. Welcome to all the new podmass fans.

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Speaker 3: We should how do we because I feel like we're

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Speaker 3: starting with scratch with a bunch of people who just

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Speaker 3: heard about us from the podmasts Best of list.

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Speaker 1: Right right, right, right right, Yes, we were heavily featured

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Speaker 1: on that list, one of the biggest.

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Speaker 3: Podcasts on there.

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Speaker 1: You know, I would reference our iTunes description if they

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Speaker 1: haven't read it yet, which is it's a podcast that

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Speaker 1: offers a healthy dose of humor and sensuality.

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Speaker 3: It's short, yeah, and it cuts off, cuts off very abruptly. Sure,

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Speaker 3: there is no period.

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Speaker 2: It's no period. It's there's a comma as if.

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Speaker 3: It's going to continue. And we talk about movies, funny movies,

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Speaker 3: Central movies and funny movies.

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Speaker 1: And now with the prevalence of dough Boys, we talk

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Speaker 1: about food and fast food chain.

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Speaker 3: Uh and TV and books and music and we have.

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Speaker 1: Books, nerds, music, TV, movies, radio, Stern is God, Stern

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Speaker 1: is King.

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Speaker 3: And there's one other thing we talk about. Hey, I'm sorry, right,

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Speaker 3: we said music books, Male the Mail, and we have

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Speaker 3: repeat guests on our show. Sometimes, uh you might notice

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Speaker 3: our our our show, our production value is very high.

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Speaker 3: But sometimes I'll be in a different location than Sean.

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Speaker 3: Uh So, right now I am actually in New York.

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Speaker 3: Sean is in is in Los Angeles. We are not

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Speaker 3: in the same place recording the show. And the reason

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Speaker 3: I'm here because we do have a repeat guests that

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Speaker 3: we we like to come back frequently. I'm taking a

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Speaker 3: little trip to New York to visit my friend Tom Sharpling,

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Speaker 3: who has a long history on the show. Tom. Can you, yeah, Hi,

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Speaker 3: say something Hi, Sean.

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Speaker 1: Tombo, what's crack a lacin bruh?

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Speaker 5: Yeah, no, No, I'm doing pretty good. I'm doing pretty good.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, but that's not what I ask what's cracking? I

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Speaker 3: was going to say, I don't know. Can you hear him?

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Speaker 5: Okay, oh yeah, you know, I can hear him. I

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Speaker 5: just didn't know. I just I just don't want to

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Speaker 5: get anything wrong. It's really what I'm trying to just do.

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Speaker 3: Okay, Well, in that case, then the thing to do

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Speaker 3: would be to answer the question.

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Speaker 5: That, Okay, so I already got something wrong.

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Speaker 3: If that is what you're trying to do is not

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Speaker 3: get things wrong. It would be to answer the question.

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Speaker 3: And this is all coming from a collaborative place, which

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Speaker 3: is our relationship now. Anyway, answer the question and we'll

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Speaker 3: keep going.

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Speaker 5: Okay, it's all crack alacin.

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Speaker 3: Bro, that's a very extreme everything. But I got it

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Speaker 3: wrong again.

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Speaker 5: I've just never heard of on pull lot of stuff's

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Speaker 5: crack alactin.

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Speaker 3: Bro.

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Speaker 1: Okay, if everything's crack a lacin, then nothing's crack alack.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, I'm with you on that.

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Speaker 2: How would you.

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Speaker 1: Know what's crack a lacin unless some things were not

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Speaker 1: crack It's unfortunate some things have.

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Speaker 3: To not be crack a lacin. But that is what

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Speaker 3: makes the things that are crackle. I can shine so.

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Speaker 2: Bright for us.

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Speaker 5: Sure, No, I got it message received. A whole lot

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Speaker 5: of stuff is crackled.

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Speaker 3: I can't see Tom. I can't see Tom. Is he

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Speaker 3: getting it? Actually he has like his finger on his

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Speaker 3: temple like he is really thinking about it, So I

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Speaker 3: don't know if he. If he is, there's certainly an

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Speaker 3: effort to get it, whether or not he actually is

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Speaker 3: getting it. He is like he's looking up in the

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Speaker 3: air and he's putting his finger on his temple and

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Speaker 3: he's he is thinking about it for sure.

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Speaker 5: I a whole Yeah, it's a six sixty percent of

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Speaker 5: what could be krack alac in is crack alac in

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Speaker 5: for me?

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Speaker 2: Bro not bad better than half.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, I'll take that over forty percent.

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Speaker 3: We're gonna go. We're just gonna go. We're okay, We're okay.

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Speaker 3: We Tom has a long history of the show, initially

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Speaker 3: as sort of an acquaintance, someone we didn't really know.

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Speaker 3: I think Earwolf just like had him on. And then

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Speaker 3: he eventually became a jealous enemy of the show. Uh,

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Speaker 3: and then someone we forgot about for a long time. Uh.

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Speaker 3: And then gradually you started your you were sending in

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Speaker 3: submissions via fax jokes for the show. Yes, and then

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Speaker 3: gradually we did have you in every once in a while,

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Speaker 3: you would do a day. We have these big like

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Speaker 3: pitching rooms where we have different people into pitch. The

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Speaker 3: jump is yeah, yeah, yeah, and you are a real

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Speaker 3: standout in that those rooms. What were some of the ideas, I, uh,

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Speaker 3: some of the ideas that you have that we that

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Speaker 3: we did. I had that whole stranger things, Yeah, a

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Speaker 3: lot of strangers thing stuff that went great, that was

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Speaker 3: that really story? Where are we in the upside down?

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Speaker 5: Or Yeah, there was that whole that whole upside down

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Speaker 5: thing where it's like just like, uh like Bernie won

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Speaker 5: the nomination in the upside Down.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, we it was sort of a version of the

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Speaker 3: upside Down where everything was kind of the opposite. Yeah,

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Speaker 3: and which I later did look into the show and

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Speaker 3: that is not and this is fine, but that is

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Speaker 3: not what the upside down is on the show. You

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Speaker 3: at the time were very insisted that you had seen

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Speaker 3: all of all of the show.

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Speaker 5: I thought I was watching it, and it turned out

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Speaker 5: it turned out I was watching something on Hulu. Yeah, okay,

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Speaker 5: not Netflix. I don't have a Netflix subscription yet. I

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Speaker 5: was watching something on Hulu.

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Speaker 3: Okay.

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Speaker 1: Well that was confusing because you did talk so much

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Speaker 1: about Stranger Things and how you had watched it, and

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Speaker 1: then you asked me if I had a Netflix.

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Speaker 3: Password you could use maybe a full six months later.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, that sort of tipped me off that I should

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Speaker 1: check this thing out and see if you were right,

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Speaker 1: because you had that long riff that we used about

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Speaker 1: pineapple upside down cake and what they call it in

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Speaker 1: the Stranger Things world.

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Speaker 3: Mm. Hmmm, yeah, which is just pineapple cake.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, pineapple cake.

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Speaker 1: So and I and I was like, oh, this is

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Speaker 1: so you know, so richly informed by the show and

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Speaker 1: the characters. And then it turns out out they don't

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Speaker 1: even really bring up cake on that show.

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Speaker 3: They're fighting monsters.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, it turned out I was I was watching Seinfeld

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Speaker 5: on Hulu.

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Speaker 3: I thought it was see, okay, so that is the

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Speaker 3: other because you you were talking about some Sidefeld characters,

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Speaker 3: but also, uh, Danny Castellano from The Mindy Project was

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Speaker 3: there as well, but he is interacting with like Creamer

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Speaker 3: and stuff. So I wonder, I don't know, like if

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Speaker 3: this is one show or if they're sort of like

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Speaker 3: blending into each They were.

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Speaker 5: Starting to blur together. And I had this whole thing

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Speaker 5: where where the Dema Gorgan is can't sleep because he's

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Speaker 5: next to a Kenny Rodgers roasters is outside his window

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Speaker 5: and he just can't sleep.

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Speaker 3: So then he.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, and and then he moved and share he shared

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Speaker 5: apartments with uh, he switched apartments with with the Danny

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Speaker 5: Castellano and then like Danny.

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Speaker 3: Mister Marbles, he thinks the dummies alive.

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Speaker 5: It was so I guess I should have sprung for

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Speaker 5: the Netflix.

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Speaker 3: Because you would say weed Newman's eating broccoli because you

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Speaker 3: would say at the time, it's all the computer. You

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Speaker 3: were very insistant that it is all the computer. Which

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Speaker 3: is it turns out also true, but yeah, it turns

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Speaker 3: out very different. It was different thing.

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Speaker 1: He remember, Jerry is going Newman. You wouldn't eat broccoli

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Speaker 1: if it was dipped in chocolate sauce.

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Speaker 3: And now Tom, I notice you're not really reacting to

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Speaker 3: these things Sean is bringing up. And you did used

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Speaker 3: to give a Seinfeld tour. I don't know if this

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Speaker 3: is something that you're not that it is not part

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Speaker 3: of your life anymore.

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Speaker 5: But legally I I am not allowed to talk too

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Speaker 5: much about the Seinfeld tour. I have to be very

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Speaker 5: judicious because of the whole Stranger Things thing. I was

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Speaker 5: also giving a Stranger Things tour through New York, showing

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Speaker 5: where in New York City where all the things happened

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Speaker 5: in Stranger Things. And I was like, this is where

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Speaker 5: the where Barb got her head cut off, And then

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Speaker 5: it turned out I was that it didn't take place

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Speaker 5: in New York at.

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Speaker 3: All, and that was at Madison Square Garden that you

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Speaker 3: just were pointing to us. Yes, it was.

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Speaker 5: It was for that first that first MMA fight at

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Speaker 5: Madison Square Garden, and then I introduced Connor McGregor as

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Speaker 5: as the cop from Stranger Things.

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Speaker 3: He thought he was.

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Speaker 5: He wasn't happy. Netflix wasn't happy. The two brothers who

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Speaker 5: do that thing were not happy. Seinfeld, Jerry Seinfeld was

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Speaker 5: not happy. Castle Rock Entertainment was so mad at me.

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Speaker 5: Sure for that, because I even had a thing where

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Speaker 5: where we would I would play that song at the end, right.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, at the end of the tour, at the end

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Speaker 3: of the tour, I'd played there. Tom did ambling.

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Speaker 1: Get upset because the Stranger Things is actually and I'm

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Speaker 1: one of the people that has noticed this heavily influenced

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Speaker 1: by the Amblin films.

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Speaker 3: Amblin what is that now?

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Speaker 2: Remember et et?

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Speaker 6: Yes, extraterrestrial alien Sure ET's Amblin, Yeah, et So, because look,

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Speaker 6: I was, I was piesing a fair amount of the

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Speaker 6: Stranger Thing stuff together off what I would see on Twitter,

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Speaker 6: and uh.

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Speaker 5: I kind of got it wrong and I was sued.

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Speaker 5: I got sued, yeah, by Netflix. Yeah, the brothers who

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Speaker 5: did Stranger Things. Because you said, this is the official

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Speaker 5: Stranger Things tour. Yes, hosted by the Dust brother hosted

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Speaker 5: by the main Kid. I remember seeing the promotional materials

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Speaker 5: that you said, I'm the main kid from Stranger Things. Yeah,

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Speaker 5: and then what I would do is I had this

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Speaker 5: uh puppet that I would pull out, and I thought

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Speaker 5: that I didn't know the kid's name was eleven. I

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Speaker 5: didn't know that was the kid. Yeah, I thought I

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Speaker 5: was supposed to. I thought it was like she was eleven.

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Speaker 5: Uh huh, And so I was just that's not that fuck.

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Speaker 3: Oh wait, well I got that right.

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Speaker 5: I should have brought that up in the fucking court case.

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Speaker 5: I could have won that.

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Speaker 3: Dust the Dust brother sued you. It was.

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Speaker 5: Flicks, Comma, Castle Rock Entertainment, Comma, Seinfeld Coma, Jerry Comma,

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Speaker 5: Stranger Things Comma, the Dust Brothers Comma, the Duplas Brothers Comma.

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Speaker 5: They got in on it because I was also doing

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Speaker 5: a puffy.

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Speaker 3: Chair to briefly, I was doing.

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Speaker 5: A puffy chair.

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Speaker 3: Oh I'm sorry.

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Speaker 5: Were I would pull out the puffy chair to do

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Speaker 5: it together this tour, I couldn't get that together, get

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Speaker 5: it it was, but I had I had a chair

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Speaker 5: that I claimed was the puffy chair, right, And then

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Speaker 5: when people would sit in it. I would push it

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Speaker 5: and then say, now you're in the upside down, you

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Speaker 5: piece of shit. And they kept getting hurt because it

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Speaker 5: was less of a chair. It was less of a

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Speaker 5: puffy chair and more of like a bench.

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Speaker 3: So much the cursing of the tour, I think, I

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Speaker 3: guess you thought it was like a filthy kid.

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Speaker 5: I thought that's what eleven was, like a dice kind

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Speaker 5: of kid, right, Yeah, because she was the one with

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Speaker 5: the shaved head who wore that leather jacket. And I

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Speaker 5: would come out and just go like.

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Speaker 3: Because she was had a leather jacket, that she was

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Speaker 3: like the dice man as a child.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, And she'd go like this kid here with the lisp,

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Speaker 5: we're talking about going into the upside down. And he's like, hey,

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Speaker 5: don't want to go in to the upside down? And

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Speaker 5: I was like, we're going in your dunce. I thought

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Speaker 5: that's what the kid said. Yeah, yeah, And I was

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Speaker 5: way off, and I fought legally. I found out how

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Speaker 5: far off I was. That's why I don't mention the

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Speaker 5: Seinfeld tour so much.

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Speaker 3: Well, it worked for us. It worked great for the show,

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Speaker 3: and so for us. Yeah, and so we've had you

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Speaker 3: win on like a weekly kind of deal since then,

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Speaker 3: because now I'm just doing the Sully tour, right, yeah,

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Speaker 3: and that's free. Can you just do the joke from

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Speaker 3: the end of the movie, is that right, the.

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Speaker 5: Sully one where I'm just like, I wish it was July.

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Speaker 3: Does that work out and we're out roll credit? Do

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Speaker 3: you ever have people like because if when you just

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Speaker 3: say that, like not providing any context for it, I'll

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Speaker 3: give you.

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Speaker 5: This is what the Sully tour consists of. We go

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Speaker 5: to the Hudson. I say to them, I wish it

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Speaker 5: was July. And then they seem confused and I pushed

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Speaker 5: them into the Hudson and I say, that's where the

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Speaker 5: plane was, asshole.

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Speaker 1: But don't you do it twice because I noticed in

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Speaker 1: the movie they show the exact tint.

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Speaker 2: Footage of the crash.

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Speaker 3: But yeah, yeah, I.

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Speaker 2: Think they were happy with how it came out.

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Speaker 5: And you say get out, I say, come out. I go,

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Speaker 5: this is what I say, I wish it was July.

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Speaker 5: And they're like what, And then I shove them in

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Speaker 5: the Hudson. Then I started, I go birds.

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Speaker 1: I have a pitch for the Sully Tour, which is

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Speaker 1: then at the end of it.

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Speaker 3: You call your wife.

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Speaker 2: She has a lot of questions, but you just go

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Speaker 2: turn on the news.

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Speaker 1: Like, don't tell her you love her or anything, indicate

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Speaker 1: that something bad has.

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Speaker 3: Happened, but just go turn on the news.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, and then you talk to her again. The next day,

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Speaker 5: he was very busy. To be fair, he had to

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Speaker 5: go on a talk show. He couldn't tell his wife

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Speaker 5: and children what he was up to. He had to jog.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, go on letter, you got a cold, jog, go

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Speaker 3: to a bar. Hey, you'll let God.

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Speaker 1: Once and for all get rid of these people who

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Speaker 1: see what actually went wrong on a plane. Yeah, these

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Speaker 1: villains in our society who are trying to figure out

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Speaker 1: exactly what went wrong on a plane when it crashes.

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Speaker 2: Can we get rid of these people? I'm sorry.

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Speaker 1: I find happened happened. The pilot did it, and it's fine.

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Speaker 3: There's no reason to this. Yes, there's no reason to

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Speaker 3: assue that the pilot did anything wrong. Yeah.

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Speaker 5: I find it disgusting that was supposed to happen. That

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00:19:28,640 --> 00:19:32,000
Speaker 5: these terrible people. And this is also something I say

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Speaker 5: in the cut. This is how I close out the tour.

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00:19:34,280 --> 00:19:38,000
Speaker 5: I say it. I don't know about you guy, Well,

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00:19:38,040 --> 00:19:41,359
Speaker 5: First of all, guys, kick and you won't go under.

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Speaker 5: That's what I say, because they are in the Hudson

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Speaker 5: at this point. Really don't get any of that water

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Speaker 5: in your mouth because it's super disgusting. But then I say,

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Speaker 5: I think I speak for all of us when I

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Speaker 5: say it is nauseating that this this air Federal Commission

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Speaker 5: would take two days to question whether this guy landed

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Speaker 5: a plane in the Hudson when he didn't have to,

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Speaker 5: just because that's what every computer projection said that he

349
00:20:16,640 --> 00:20:19,280
Speaker 5: did wrong. Now, if you guys want to climb out

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00:20:19,359 --> 00:20:24,399
Speaker 5: of there, we can head over to the no soup

351
00:20:24,440 --> 00:20:25,960
Speaker 5: for you and you guys can warm up.

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Speaker 3: I like that Sully have money problems. Uh So the

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Speaker 3: Sully stuff has been great. All your stuff has been

354
00:20:37,160 --> 00:20:40,919
Speaker 3: so good. Thank you. So what we do, you know,

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Speaker 3: we like to sort of show how it works behind

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Speaker 3: the scenes. And what we like to do is at

357
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Speaker 3: the end of the week, when your contact contract is

358
00:20:48,080 --> 00:20:51,080
Speaker 3: kind of running out, we usually talk to you over

359
00:20:51,119 --> 00:20:53,680
Speaker 3: the phone and you give us kind of the pitch

360
00:20:53,760 --> 00:20:56,919
Speaker 3: for like your big idea for next week's show, and

361
00:20:56,960 --> 00:20:59,919
Speaker 3: we either renew you or we don't sort of be

362
00:21:00,200 --> 00:21:02,760
Speaker 3: on that pitch so it's kind of like a back

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00:21:02,800 --> 00:21:06,520
Speaker 3: and forth process with us. And you said when we

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00:21:06,560 --> 00:21:09,960
Speaker 3: called you and the last week for the Christmas we

365
00:21:09,960 --> 00:21:12,679
Speaker 3: had told you we need a Christmas show. Obviously we

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Speaker 3: always do have a big blowout Christmas show. Christmas not

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Speaker 3: holiday show. Christmas show. Yeah, and which is we like

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00:21:20,720 --> 00:21:23,640
Speaker 3: the other ones too, but like the other holiday.

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Speaker 1: I'm sorry, the front lines of the war on Christmas,

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Speaker 1: you know, they're not being fought, and just Macy's, it's

371
00:21:37,560 --> 00:21:39,560
Speaker 1: we're fighting him in our own backyard.

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00:21:40,359 --> 00:21:46,480
Speaker 3: Yeah, Macy's, think about it. Go on about the Macy's thing. Yeah,

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Speaker 3: I know, I know. I just think it is No,

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Speaker 3: I just think it's a point worth making, the Macy's

375
00:21:51,640 --> 00:21:54,400
Speaker 3: aspect of it specifically. I just want people to really

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Speaker 3: get it.

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00:21:56,240 --> 00:21:59,159
Speaker 2: Okay, well think, okay.

378
00:22:00,440 --> 00:22:04,000
Speaker 3: Some of these stores, Tom saying what you were saying

379
00:22:04,040 --> 00:22:05,160
Speaker 3: the other day about.

380
00:22:04,840 --> 00:22:06,720
Speaker 5: This about Macy's.

381
00:22:07,840 --> 00:22:12,840
Speaker 3: Yes, the war on Christmas and yeah, the holidays and Macy's.

382
00:22:13,040 --> 00:22:16,560
Speaker 5: Well, you know, with Macy's, it really is like if

383
00:22:16,600 --> 00:22:18,760
Speaker 5: there is a war on Christmas, which there is war

384
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Speaker 5: on Christmas, you go to Macy's and that's like when

385
00:22:24,880 --> 00:22:26,840
Speaker 5: you're on the wait, what was it that you said

386
00:22:26,880 --> 00:22:29,119
Speaker 5: about it, Sean. I'm trying to think how you phrased it.

387
00:22:29,119 --> 00:22:29,639
Speaker 5: I don't want to.

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Speaker 2: Get it wrong, right right, right, Yeah, I wish I

389
00:22:34,119 --> 00:22:35,919
Speaker 2: had written it down, because I did say it in

390
00:22:35,960 --> 00:22:38,480
Speaker 2: a good way that made sense before Hay.

391
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Speaker 5: Do you remember.

392
00:22:40,560 --> 00:22:45,040
Speaker 3: I think it had something to do with you thinking

393
00:22:46,040 --> 00:22:51,880
Speaker 3: that Macy's had tried to buy Christmas so only they

394
00:22:51,960 --> 00:22:55,359
Speaker 3: could have it and they were not letting anyone else

395
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Speaker 3: have Christmas. Was it something like that, that's not my Christmas.

396
00:22:59,800 --> 00:23:00,840
Speaker 5: Yeah, that was your.

397
00:23:00,720 --> 00:23:04,080
Speaker 3: Big thing, that's not your Christmas. Christmas should be free.

398
00:23:04,160 --> 00:23:06,840
Speaker 3: I think you were saying it shouldn't be so expensive,

399
00:23:06,920 --> 00:23:09,280
Speaker 3: Christmas should be free to all.

400
00:23:10,960 --> 00:23:14,040
Speaker 2: So I hate that people think it has anything to

401
00:23:14,080 --> 00:23:14,880
Speaker 2: do with religion.

402
00:23:15,800 --> 00:23:18,560
Speaker 3: Yeah, so this is a big like Earwolf has not

403
00:23:18,640 --> 00:23:21,200
Speaker 3: wanted us to do this show, which is a secular

404
00:23:21,280 --> 00:23:28,679
Speaker 3: Christmas because we're like our whole thing is like like

405
00:23:29,320 --> 00:23:32,760
Speaker 3: that you can celebrate, and you like, you can be

406
00:23:32,840 --> 00:23:35,360
Speaker 3: an atheist and celebrate. This is not really my thing

407
00:23:35,440 --> 00:23:38,560
Speaker 3: so much as Sean's, but that he has kind of

408
00:23:38,560 --> 00:23:42,200
Speaker 3: like a special tree, like an atheist tree.

409
00:23:43,240 --> 00:23:46,480
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, it's an atheist tree. It looks just like

410
00:23:46,520 --> 00:23:49,040
Speaker 2: a Christmas tree, but it's brown and it's own fire.

411
00:23:50,680 --> 00:23:52,480
Speaker 3: So you know, we go to Tom and we say, okay,

412
00:23:52,480 --> 00:23:54,240
Speaker 3: we're going to do the Big Book, well Christmas show,

413
00:23:54,640 --> 00:23:57,200
Speaker 3: and you said that we needed to be that one

414
00:23:57,200 --> 00:24:00,880
Speaker 3: of us actually needed to be here. You didn't want

415
00:24:00,960 --> 00:24:04,359
Speaker 3: us to lose any of the impact of the pitch

416
00:24:05,320 --> 00:24:09,880
Speaker 3: by being there remotely. So you flew me out because

417
00:24:09,920 --> 00:24:11,320
Speaker 3: I guess there's like a I don't is it a

418
00:24:11,400 --> 00:24:14,800
Speaker 3: visual component or is it just your You said I

419
00:24:14,880 --> 00:24:16,920
Speaker 3: need to be able to see your face.

420
00:24:17,040 --> 00:24:22,280
Speaker 5: Because look, I can't fly for another eighteen months because

421
00:24:22,280 --> 00:24:23,119
Speaker 5: of this lawsuit.

422
00:24:24,440 --> 00:24:26,720
Speaker 3: And even if I could, the second.

423
00:24:26,600 --> 00:24:29,800
Speaker 5: Sell said, well, certainly the board, the Sully thing, the

424
00:24:29,960 --> 00:24:32,280
Speaker 5: FAA is definitely. First of all, I'm not getting on

425
00:24:32,280 --> 00:24:35,879
Speaker 5: a plane because I'm terrified. Yeah, if I'm sitting, i

426
00:24:35,920 --> 00:24:38,320
Speaker 5: won't fly first class anymore because I'm too close to

427
00:24:38,359 --> 00:24:41,600
Speaker 5: the where the pilot's sitting. If I hear through that door, Birds,

428
00:24:42,400 --> 00:24:45,640
Speaker 5: I don't know what I'll do, right, because I could

429
00:24:45,640 --> 00:24:49,000
Speaker 5: hear it then, right, Birds, Yeah.

430
00:24:49,119 --> 00:24:50,320
Speaker 2: I'll tell you what you won't do.

431
00:24:50,840 --> 00:24:55,160
Speaker 1: Land in the ods and and not get some professor

432
00:24:55,200 --> 00:24:57,320
Speaker 1: from the government putting a microscope up.

433
00:24:57,240 --> 00:24:58,520
Speaker 3: There, but some pencil.

434
00:24:59,040 --> 00:24:59,920
Speaker 2: This is the way they hate it.

435
00:25:01,240 --> 00:25:05,280
Speaker 3: Yeah, and you've personally threatened all of everyone associated with

436
00:25:05,400 --> 00:25:07,679
Speaker 3: the the FAA and it.

437
00:25:07,960 --> 00:25:10,679
Speaker 5: Yes, there's that. And the second I set foot in

438
00:25:11,400 --> 00:25:16,720
Speaker 5: Los Angeles, Yeah, there's that that I'm worried. I'm so

439
00:25:16,920 --> 00:25:19,680
Speaker 5: worried about the Stranger Things cast.

440
00:25:20,560 --> 00:25:21,080
Speaker 3: Yeah, just.

441
00:25:22,560 --> 00:25:25,520
Speaker 5: Serving it. I've just beaten the tar out of me. Yeah,

442
00:25:25,960 --> 00:25:28,040
Speaker 5: and then just putting me right back on a plane.

443
00:25:28,440 --> 00:25:30,040
Speaker 5: And I won't get to pitch the thing. So I

444
00:25:30,080 --> 00:25:30,920
Speaker 5: asked you to come out.

445
00:25:31,080 --> 00:25:33,320
Speaker 3: I've seen that. This is so interesting because sometimes I

446
00:25:33,359 --> 00:25:35,399
Speaker 3: will land in Los Angeles and I will see the

447
00:25:35,400 --> 00:25:38,000
Speaker 3: Stranger Thing is cast waiting where like they wait for

448
00:25:38,080 --> 00:25:40,600
Speaker 3: like the limo guys, and they're holding a sign that

449
00:25:40,680 --> 00:25:41,800
Speaker 3: says the bitch.

450
00:25:42,920 --> 00:25:46,240
Speaker 5: And that's because that's usually I'll just go, oh, that's

451
00:25:46,280 --> 00:25:50,320
Speaker 5: me when I see that, right, and I think that's

452
00:25:50,359 --> 00:25:52,000
Speaker 5: the I think that might be the trap.

453
00:25:52,359 --> 00:25:54,359
Speaker 3: Yeah, and then they and then they beat you.

454
00:25:55,040 --> 00:25:57,359
Speaker 5: Which is not unlike an episode of Seinfeld where I

455
00:25:57,440 --> 00:25:59,840
Speaker 5: used to give the tour over at Madison Square Garden

456
00:26:00,280 --> 00:26:04,359
Speaker 5: where the hate rally was being held. Okay, remember the

457
00:26:04,400 --> 00:26:06,480
Speaker 5: hate rally. Remember the episode where they took the limo.

458
00:26:07,640 --> 00:26:09,560
Speaker 5: Jerry and George took the limo, and then they went

459
00:26:09,600 --> 00:26:12,920
Speaker 5: to the the hate rally at Madison Square Garden because

460
00:26:12,920 --> 00:26:15,040
Speaker 5: they thought George was a white supremacist.

461
00:26:15,200 --> 00:26:17,760
Speaker 1: They walk up to the person holding the limo sign

462
00:26:17,840 --> 00:26:19,640
Speaker 1: and they go, I'm.

463
00:26:19,560 --> 00:26:24,119
Speaker 2: Mister Glacko Witch. No, I'm mister Galli Weakitch. And then

464
00:26:24,119 --> 00:26:27,520
Speaker 2: the limo guy goes, you're doctor Glacowitch and then they

465
00:26:27,520 --> 00:26:28,240
Speaker 2: get in the limo.

466
00:26:28,560 --> 00:26:33,080
Speaker 5: That's the one and usually it would culminate. It always

467
00:26:33,160 --> 00:26:37,080
Speaker 5: works well now with these MMA fights, because that's pretty

468
00:26:37,160 --> 00:26:39,440
Speaker 5: much the closest thing to a hate rally that can

469
00:26:39,440 --> 00:26:45,480
Speaker 5: be at Madison Square Garden is Connor McGregor fight. Yeah,

470
00:26:45,520 --> 00:26:49,520
Speaker 5: it doubles as a hate rally. It's like it, but

471
00:26:49,560 --> 00:26:51,399
Speaker 5: they just don't say it's like a it's a fight

472
00:26:51,920 --> 00:26:56,040
Speaker 5: majors in fighting, minors in hate. But when you're there,

473
00:26:56,160 --> 00:26:57,840
Speaker 5: I can say, like, and this is where the Seinfeld

474
00:26:57,880 --> 00:26:58,520
Speaker 5: to our ends.

475
00:26:58,600 --> 00:27:00,920
Speaker 3: Should you be doing this? I'm sorry, I just don't

476
00:27:00,920 --> 00:27:05,639
Speaker 3: want to. Should you be talking about this stuff? Probably not.

477
00:27:06,119 --> 00:27:08,880
Speaker 3: Isn't this like explicitly what you're not allowed to do? Yes?

478
00:27:09,040 --> 00:27:10,479
Speaker 5: So I can't fly Tom?

479
00:27:10,640 --> 00:27:11,480
Speaker 3: Yeah?

480
00:27:12,119 --> 00:27:17,080
Speaker 1: Are you actually getting on the hill of that? A

481
00:27:17,160 --> 00:27:21,040
Speaker 1: lot of fighting and hate are closely related.

482
00:27:22,359 --> 00:27:24,920
Speaker 3: I mean, are you going to do that the.

483
00:27:24,960 --> 00:27:27,720
Speaker 5: Idea that that hate and fighting are.

484
00:27:27,520 --> 00:27:30,080
Speaker 3: Are uh, Tom, Yeah, I have heard you talk about this.

485
00:27:30,160 --> 00:27:34,119
Speaker 1: I mean, you're drawing correlation between hate and fighting, and

486
00:27:34,200 --> 00:27:36,119
Speaker 1: I just don't know if you want to be on record.

487
00:27:36,160 --> 00:27:38,480
Speaker 5: You're right, I should. I should probably have to break something.

488
00:27:38,520 --> 00:27:38,639
Speaker 1: Well.

489
00:27:38,680 --> 00:27:41,080
Speaker 3: I mean, this is fine for Facebook among your friends,

490
00:27:41,080 --> 00:27:42,880
Speaker 3: because I've seen Tom does a lot of posts about

491
00:27:42,880 --> 00:27:47,000
Speaker 3: the relationship between hate and fighting and being mad and

492
00:27:47,320 --> 00:27:51,240
Speaker 3: the like sort of connections that you forged between these things.

493
00:27:51,240 --> 00:27:55,200
Speaker 5: People who are mad fight, and they fight often fight

494
00:27:55,280 --> 00:27:55,840
Speaker 5: someone they.

495
00:27:55,720 --> 00:27:58,960
Speaker 3: Hate, right, and this is like your yeah, yeah, but

496
00:27:59,000 --> 00:27:59,879
Speaker 3: I guess should I delete?

497
00:28:00,200 --> 00:28:04,119
Speaker 1: And some of the studies you've posted on Facebook, honestly,

498
00:28:04,280 --> 00:28:06,800
Speaker 1: you're like a I mean a lot of people know

499
00:28:08,080 --> 00:28:09,840
Speaker 1: you're sort of an armchair.

500
00:28:10,920 --> 00:28:13,320
Speaker 3: Psychological ex social scientist.

501
00:28:14,600 --> 00:28:16,359
Speaker 2: And yeah, social scientists.

502
00:28:16,400 --> 00:28:19,640
Speaker 1: And some of the numbers you put up of madness,

503
00:28:19,800 --> 00:28:26,320
Speaker 1: fighting and hate, you know, being intertwined has really made

504
00:28:26,359 --> 00:28:28,360
Speaker 1: me think. But I just don't know if you want

505
00:28:28,400 --> 00:28:29,960
Speaker 1: to be on the radio thing.

506
00:28:30,000 --> 00:28:32,040
Speaker 5: You're right, You're right, I'm gonna I'm gonna tap the

507
00:28:32,040 --> 00:28:33,120
Speaker 5: brakes on this whole thing.

508
00:28:33,640 --> 00:28:36,000
Speaker 3: Okay, so you can't fly which is why you needed

509
00:28:36,359 --> 00:28:37,800
Speaker 3: you to come here, me to be here.

510
00:28:38,000 --> 00:28:44,000
Speaker 5: Yeah, So without further ado, Okay, I'm pitching to both

511
00:28:44,000 --> 00:28:52,640
Speaker 5: of you, Sean orally and hello, Hello, Hi, Hi, yeah

512
00:28:52,680 --> 00:28:58,320
Speaker 5: he said his name. Yes, Hi. I'm pitching the twenty

513
00:28:58,400 --> 00:29:05,160
Speaker 5: sixteen Hollywood hand Book Christmas Extravaganza because and again I

514
00:29:05,200 --> 00:29:10,520
Speaker 5: will say it's daunting. Your holiday shows really set the

515
00:29:10,560 --> 00:29:15,880
Speaker 5: bar for Christmas podcasts.

516
00:29:16,000 --> 00:29:17,800
Speaker 3: Yeah, well, a't the end of the year. We actually

517
00:29:17,800 --> 00:29:19,719
Speaker 3: we usually have some stuff left over in our budget,

518
00:29:19,880 --> 00:29:21,800
Speaker 3: so you can fact don't worry as much about that

519
00:29:21,840 --> 00:29:23,880
Speaker 3: as you normally do. When you know, we try to

520
00:29:24,360 --> 00:29:28,560
Speaker 3: like keep the budget at a reasonable level, we usually

521
00:29:28,560 --> 00:29:30,880
Speaker 3: have a little extra to spend. Okay, so that's why

522
00:29:30,920 --> 00:29:33,560
Speaker 3: they tend to be these kind of bigger Sure it's

523
00:29:33,600 --> 00:29:35,080
Speaker 3: a bash, it's a big Christmas batch.

524
00:29:35,560 --> 00:29:38,560
Speaker 1: Yeah, and that we don't spend it. They just decrease

525
00:29:38,600 --> 00:29:41,320
Speaker 1: our budget for the following year. So we do actually

526
00:29:41,400 --> 00:29:43,920
Speaker 1: have to use a lot of the money. So a

527
00:29:43,920 --> 00:29:46,160
Speaker 1: lot of times we have beens we don't even want there.

528
00:29:47,600 --> 00:29:50,600
Speaker 5: Well, I've got some pretty sweet ideas that I think

529
00:29:50,680 --> 00:29:54,920
Speaker 5: you guys are gonna like hopefully and will be in

530
00:29:54,960 --> 00:30:02,120
Speaker 5: the tradition of all the Past Hollywood Handbook, Christmas Tom.

531
00:30:02,520 --> 00:30:04,760
Speaker 1: Just before you get into this, because you're being so

532
00:30:04,920 --> 00:30:07,600
Speaker 1: nice about our show, I do want to say, and

533
00:30:07,680 --> 00:30:10,280
Speaker 1: I know you don't you hate hearing this. I think

534
00:30:10,320 --> 00:30:12,360
Speaker 1: you should start doing the best show again.

535
00:30:14,960 --> 00:30:15,240
Speaker 3: Again.

536
00:30:15,720 --> 00:30:19,920
Speaker 5: Okay, because I've been I do it every Tuesday, I

537
00:30:19,960 --> 00:30:20,640
Speaker 5: have any mission.

538
00:30:20,800 --> 00:30:23,479
Speaker 1: I know that was it was always on Tuesdays, and

539
00:30:23,520 --> 00:30:25,160
Speaker 1: I think you should fire it back up.

540
00:30:25,600 --> 00:30:27,080
Speaker 3: People miss this thing.

541
00:30:28,120 --> 00:30:31,840
Speaker 5: Well, they don't miss it because it has It went

542
00:30:31,880 --> 00:30:36,240
Speaker 5: away for a year two years ago. I have pretty

543
00:30:36,320 --> 00:30:40,000
Speaker 5: much spent every Tuesday for the last two years doing

544
00:30:40,040 --> 00:30:40,480
Speaker 5: the show.

545
00:30:41,640 --> 00:30:43,480
Speaker 3: Including that's such a good attitude.

546
00:30:44,200 --> 00:30:46,800
Speaker 2: That's so great. It's like you never missed a beat.

547
00:30:46,920 --> 00:30:49,480
Speaker 3: That's exactly that is exactly how you should meet thinking.

548
00:30:49,480 --> 00:30:50,320
Speaker 5: Okay, well.

549
00:30:52,360 --> 00:30:53,840
Speaker 2: That's going to serve you so well.

550
00:30:53,880 --> 00:30:56,480
Speaker 1: When you get this thing back on its feet and

551
00:30:56,600 --> 00:30:58,800
Speaker 1: start making the show again, can we say so?

552
00:30:58,960 --> 00:31:02,720
Speaker 3: And and when you do bring it back for to

553
00:31:02,760 --> 00:31:04,840
Speaker 3: get the attention to some of the pod masts people

554
00:31:05,000 --> 00:31:07,200
Speaker 3: just what we're noticing the stuff that they respond.

555
00:31:06,840 --> 00:31:11,400
Speaker 5: To more sex, more sex.

556
00:31:11,640 --> 00:31:15,040
Speaker 3: Yeah, really, like you've got to talk about what people

557
00:31:15,160 --> 00:31:15,760
Speaker 3: want to hear.

558
00:31:16,400 --> 00:31:20,640
Speaker 1: It's a healthy bils of humor, but also sensuality, Tom.

559
00:31:20,480 --> 00:31:23,719
Speaker 3: Because this is the idea people picture you having sex?

560
00:31:24,120 --> 00:31:27,000
Speaker 5: Can I sidebar something here before I get into the pitching?

561
00:31:28,320 --> 00:31:29,520
Speaker 3: Uh huh.

562
00:31:29,640 --> 00:31:35,800
Speaker 5: I was thinking of doing a show called Tom's Tom

563
00:31:35,960 --> 00:31:42,760
Speaker 5: Demant Condiment Condom show right where I like the title.

564
00:31:43,400 --> 00:31:45,280
Speaker 3: I review.

565
00:31:46,400 --> 00:31:56,800
Speaker 5: At in just excruciating detail, different condiments from different places,

566
00:31:56,840 --> 00:32:00,240
Speaker 5: like because people review food now, so I figure, what's

567
00:32:00,280 --> 00:32:05,520
Speaker 5: the next what's the what's the next thing in that condom?

568
00:32:05,880 --> 00:32:06,520
Speaker 2: Jump on this.

569
00:32:06,680 --> 00:32:09,400
Speaker 1: I think a lot of these condiments you could find

570
00:32:09,760 --> 00:32:13,520
Speaker 1: sort of feel like comb. And now we're right into

571
00:32:13,840 --> 00:32:17,760
Speaker 1: a nice thing that is, you know, you keep the

572
00:32:17,800 --> 00:32:21,960
Speaker 1: comedy in there, but you're also sort of saying like, hey,

573
00:32:22,120 --> 00:32:24,880
Speaker 1: this is a substance I deal with sometimes because I'm

574
00:32:24,880 --> 00:32:27,600
Speaker 1: a sexual being, and just like we all like to

575
00:32:27,640 --> 00:32:31,880
Speaker 1: picture Pete Holmes having sex or Mark Mayern having sex

576
00:32:32,000 --> 00:32:34,080
Speaker 1: or any of the other people out there who are

577
00:32:34,080 --> 00:32:39,800
Speaker 1: comedians who are talking sometimes about their love life.

578
00:32:40,320 --> 00:32:43,400
Speaker 3: Let's picture Tom I'm having sex. Because he's talking about

579
00:32:43,400 --> 00:32:45,640
Speaker 3: a new mustard that he tried to on his hand.

580
00:32:45,720 --> 00:32:47,800
Speaker 3: Kind of feels like comb. I mean, what are we

581
00:32:47,920 --> 00:32:51,760
Speaker 3: doing here? Let's make a show because listening to the

582
00:32:52,040 --> 00:32:55,440
Speaker 3: like traditionally when you did the show. I would listen

583
00:32:55,480 --> 00:32:57,840
Speaker 3: to it and I'm laughing, I'm having a good time.

584
00:32:57,960 --> 00:33:03,120
Speaker 3: I'm never picturing you having sex, but very very rare,

585
00:33:03,280 --> 00:33:05,840
Speaker 3: very rare. I will say never. I want never. Okay,

586
00:33:05,920 --> 00:33:07,520
Speaker 3: never is too strong a word. I'm sorry.

587
00:33:07,600 --> 00:33:09,800
Speaker 5: Okay, very rare very rarely.

588
00:33:10,200 --> 00:33:13,240
Speaker 3: Am I getting hot and bothered and picturing listening to

589
00:33:13,280 --> 00:33:16,360
Speaker 3: the show? Well, because I thought that I would not

590
00:33:16,560 --> 00:33:19,080
Speaker 3: most of the time. I would say most of the time,

591
00:33:20,400 --> 00:33:24,840
Speaker 3: less than half of it. Very excited maybe.

592
00:33:25,320 --> 00:33:28,200
Speaker 1: Maybe a third of the time, I'm picturing you having sex.

593
00:33:28,240 --> 00:33:29,280
Speaker 3: And that's just not enough.

594
00:33:29,360 --> 00:33:31,160
Speaker 2: That's not going to get the ball over the net here?

595
00:33:31,280 --> 00:33:31,720
Speaker 3: Okay.

596
00:33:32,880 --> 00:33:38,400
Speaker 5: So it's volleyball, volleyball.

597
00:33:40,800 --> 00:33:43,600
Speaker 1: Okay, and are you working up into some sort of

598
00:33:43,680 --> 00:33:45,360
Speaker 1: sexual volleyball metaphor here?

599
00:33:45,440 --> 00:33:46,960
Speaker 5: Well, no, you're the one who said get the ball

600
00:33:47,000 --> 00:33:48,920
Speaker 5: over the net. I didn't know we were trading in

601
00:33:49,080 --> 00:33:53,600
Speaker 5: volleyball as the sport of choice. Seems a little maybe

602
00:33:53,640 --> 00:33:56,760
Speaker 5: not the first sport you'd go to to draw parallels

603
00:33:58,000 --> 00:33:58,320
Speaker 5: to this.

604
00:33:59,040 --> 00:34:01,880
Speaker 3: Okay, all right, I know you're a b ball head.

605
00:34:02,480 --> 00:34:03,880
Speaker 3: Yeah maybe we could.

606
00:34:04,120 --> 00:34:07,560
Speaker 1: Yeah, so let's talk about some of that. Maybe you know,

607
00:34:07,800 --> 00:34:10,400
Speaker 1: there's like sex and then also on your show, you

608
00:34:10,520 --> 00:34:13,720
Speaker 1: play viral videos and you do kind of a ridiculousness

609
00:34:13,760 --> 00:34:18,239
Speaker 1: thing where you're watching a guy dribble at another guy

610
00:34:18,440 --> 00:34:21,120
Speaker 1: and the other guy falls down and you're like, bruh,

611
00:34:21,160 --> 00:34:22,480
Speaker 1: somebody get this guy a.

612
00:34:22,560 --> 00:34:29,520
Speaker 3: Map or you or b ball stuff, dude. Perfect where

613
00:34:29,560 --> 00:34:32,319
Speaker 3: you say where, you say, here I go, and then

614
00:34:32,440 --> 00:34:39,520
Speaker 3: you take a impossible shot and then you say boh. Yeah.

615
00:34:39,600 --> 00:34:41,440
Speaker 3: You get a bunch of guys together and they are

616
00:34:41,520 --> 00:34:42,320
Speaker 3: like it went.

617
00:34:42,160 --> 00:34:48,000
Speaker 5: In Because with the NBA thing, to be honest, I'm

618
00:34:48,000 --> 00:34:50,520
Speaker 5: a little uncomfortable with the whole sex part of things

619
00:34:50,520 --> 00:34:52,880
Speaker 5: for me. That's why I got someone to help me

620
00:34:52,920 --> 00:34:56,000
Speaker 5: with that. I figured I would deal with the condiments part,

621
00:34:56,200 --> 00:34:59,879
Speaker 5: in which I would try different condiments that we would

622
00:35:00,120 --> 00:35:04,720
Speaker 5: it in. I would eat them out of condoms, different

623
00:35:05,400 --> 00:35:10,320
Speaker 5: different like condiments that that's the way to pass them around.

624
00:35:10,400 --> 00:35:13,960
Speaker 5: Everybody can just kind of squish them into their mouth. Yeah,

625
00:35:15,719 --> 00:35:19,439
Speaker 5: somebody's got to test these condoms out in the traditional way.

626
00:35:19,560 --> 00:35:23,279
Speaker 5: So that's why I've partnered with Joe Ingalls from the

627
00:35:23,360 --> 00:35:30,640
Speaker 5: Utah Jazz has volunteered to just he's going to just

628
00:35:31,040 --> 00:35:34,359
Speaker 5: go on a zapathon is what he called. He calls

629
00:35:34,400 --> 00:35:38,520
Speaker 5: it a zapathon, and when he does that, it's weird

630
00:35:38,560 --> 00:35:42,000
Speaker 5: because he wants to play Frank Zappa while he does it.

631
00:35:42,040 --> 00:35:52,000
Speaker 5: That's why he calls it a Zapathonay, Frank Zappa, he is,

632
00:35:52,640 --> 00:35:55,640
Speaker 5: but he's playing Frank Zappa while he does it. It's funny.

633
00:35:55,680 --> 00:35:57,359
Speaker 5: It's funnier when he explains it.

634
00:35:59,280 --> 00:36:02,120
Speaker 3: So it would make Joe Angles easily the most sexually

635
00:36:02,239 --> 00:36:04,160
Speaker 3: charged player in.

636
00:36:04,239 --> 00:36:08,560
Speaker 5: Sports, assuming he makes the All Star Team, Assuming he

637
00:36:08,600 --> 00:36:11,000
Speaker 5: makes the Western Conference All Star Team, it would start

638
00:36:11,000 --> 00:36:14,360
Speaker 5: at All Star weekend where he would probably be in

639
00:36:14,400 --> 00:36:17,439
Speaker 5: the Friday Night Skills Challenge.

640
00:36:19,560 --> 00:36:21,319
Speaker 3: That's the most watched challenge.

641
00:36:21,840 --> 00:36:25,600
Speaker 5: It's pretty tricky when they throw the throw the basketball

642
00:36:25,640 --> 00:36:26,600
Speaker 5: through the tire.

643
00:36:26,840 --> 00:36:28,240
Speaker 3: Yeah, who does.

644
00:36:28,320 --> 00:36:31,440
Speaker 2: Chris Chess pass through the tire? Chris?

645
00:36:31,719 --> 00:36:35,200
Speaker 1: That is a really hard thing. And if they miss

646
00:36:35,239 --> 00:36:37,000
Speaker 1: it three times they have to move on.

647
00:36:37,480 --> 00:36:41,560
Speaker 5: Yeah, and then have Kenny Smith just go like, I

648
00:36:41,600 --> 00:36:42,520
Speaker 5: don't know about that.

649
00:36:43,239 --> 00:36:46,120
Speaker 3: The best guys are there to just very very quickly

650
00:36:46,160 --> 00:36:50,279
Speaker 3: throw three basketballs at the tire so they can. They

651
00:36:50,280 --> 00:36:52,160
Speaker 3: would have to set upright that they can just go

652
00:36:52,239 --> 00:36:53,440
Speaker 3: straight to the next thing.

653
00:36:53,600 --> 00:36:56,960
Speaker 5: The skills. I've also wondered why they don't move move

654
00:36:57,040 --> 00:37:02,280
Speaker 5: the game to Friday Night. Yeah, dunk contests, three point contest,

655
00:37:02,320 --> 00:37:06,480
Speaker 5: stays on Saturday Night, Skills Challenge Sunday Night. Bring the

656
00:37:06,560 --> 00:37:08,640
Speaker 5: skills back to the end. Make it clear to the

657
00:37:08,800 --> 00:37:13,680
Speaker 5: to the fans, this is about dribbling through cones, throwing

658
00:37:13,719 --> 00:37:16,760
Speaker 5: a basketball through a through a tire.

659
00:37:17,600 --> 00:37:19,600
Speaker 3: Can I ask you that? So doing a lay up

660
00:37:19,680 --> 00:37:20,479
Speaker 3: this last year?

661
00:37:20,520 --> 00:37:23,719
Speaker 1: Tom, Tom were you're was it blowing your mind last

662
00:37:23,760 --> 00:37:26,799
Speaker 1: year that they had some big men in the skills contest?

663
00:37:27,920 --> 00:37:31,280
Speaker 5: I tell you it's it's a It's a different game now, Sean,

664
00:37:31,400 --> 00:37:32,200
Speaker 5: it's a different game.

665
00:37:32,360 --> 00:37:34,840
Speaker 1: Hnouncers didn't really mention it, but some of these big

666
00:37:34,880 --> 00:37:36,960
Speaker 1: men were moving with the ball like a guard.

667
00:37:37,600 --> 00:37:40,560
Speaker 5: I know, you know what I noticed. I missed that

668
00:37:41,200 --> 00:37:44,000
Speaker 5: I thought when I grew up as a kid, and

669
00:37:44,000 --> 00:37:47,080
Speaker 5: correct me if I'm wrong. When they would do the

670
00:37:47,080 --> 00:37:50,960
Speaker 5: slam dunk contest, someone would do the dunk and then

671
00:37:51,040 --> 00:37:56,120
Speaker 5: the scores would just show up, super quiet, just forty seven,

672
00:37:56,640 --> 00:38:03,120
Speaker 5: forty six, forty six seven, and then someone would go, Okay,

673
00:38:03,239 --> 00:38:07,280
Speaker 5: we've added it up and the average scorer is forty

674
00:38:07,440 --> 00:38:12,960
Speaker 5: seven for that round. But now it's gotten very lest screaming.

675
00:38:13,080 --> 00:38:14,920
Speaker 5: Was that a new thing? Is that like this year

676
00:38:15,080 --> 00:38:15,920
Speaker 5: they started doing that.

677
00:38:16,080 --> 00:38:18,880
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, it's new, and it's gotten so hard for

678
00:38:18,920 --> 00:38:22,359
Speaker 3: them to do the dugs. I have noticed when do.

679
00:38:22,320 --> 00:38:24,719
Speaker 2: I go, because the score has become the main attraction.

680
00:38:25,000 --> 00:38:28,440
Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah, yeah, I wonder what they're working. You know

681
00:38:28,520 --> 00:38:31,400
Speaker 5: that they're working it now. And I know Joe thinks

682
00:38:31,440 --> 00:38:35,800
Speaker 5: he's got an outside shot of the slam dunk contest.

683
00:38:36,520 --> 00:38:38,200
Speaker 5: He's working up a couple things.

684
00:38:38,719 --> 00:38:41,160
Speaker 1: Can I pitch you a structure now for the weekend

685
00:38:41,560 --> 00:38:45,000
Speaker 1: game Friday night? If we do it at all, Saturday,

686
00:38:45,560 --> 00:38:49,440
Speaker 1: three pointers and dunks Sunday the skills challenge, and then

687
00:38:49,520 --> 00:38:52,440
Speaker 1: the scores to the dunk contest are their own show.

688
00:38:53,800 --> 00:38:58,360
Speaker 5: That would be what if they did just stay with me, now,

689
00:38:58,840 --> 00:39:02,760
Speaker 5: what if they did just the scores, but no one dunk,

690
00:39:02,840 --> 00:39:07,800
Speaker 5: no dunks, and they make up different people from history dunking.

691
00:39:07,640 --> 00:39:10,279
Speaker 3: Or then someone has to do the dunk, the scorers

692
00:39:10,520 --> 00:39:12,440
Speaker 3: score the dunk, and then someone has to do the

693
00:39:12,520 --> 00:39:13,960
Speaker 3: dunk that they scored.

694
00:39:14,760 --> 00:39:18,920
Speaker 1: Versus okay, and and someone is a different person from history, right, yes.

695
00:39:19,440 --> 00:39:23,799
Speaker 3: Like history, rap battles from history, Yes, rap battles from

696
00:39:23,880 --> 00:39:29,279
Speaker 3: history the dunk so yes, so you would get Benjamin

697
00:39:30,560 --> 00:39:34,680
Speaker 3: Franklin is that Ben? All right? This is your guy,

698
00:39:34,800 --> 00:39:35,840
Speaker 3: This is like your pitch.

699
00:39:36,520 --> 00:39:39,719
Speaker 5: Well I'm not, I'm not okay. So you get Ben, You're.

700
00:39:41,120 --> 00:39:43,080
Speaker 3: Gonna dunk all over him.

701
00:39:43,640 --> 00:39:49,359
Speaker 5: You get Benjamin Franklin dunking right, and then you'd get

702
00:39:49,400 --> 00:39:52,319
Speaker 5: then you'd get like, uh, Joe, Joe.

703
00:39:52,480 --> 00:39:53,280
Speaker 3: I gotta get Joe.

704
00:39:53,200 --> 00:39:56,480
Speaker 5: Ingles in this thing somehow, because he's really he's got

705
00:39:56,480 --> 00:40:02,799
Speaker 5: a temper, I'm telling you, he he he. First of all,

706
00:40:02,840 --> 00:40:06,920
Speaker 5: he wants this condom part of this thing so badly?

707
00:40:08,800 --> 00:40:13,120
Speaker 3: Are you so, like, what's the timeline of this thing?

708
00:40:13,680 --> 00:40:17,239
Speaker 3: You're eating like Russian dressing, Russian dressing out of the condom. Yeah,

709
00:40:17,640 --> 00:40:19,240
Speaker 3: and then you hand the condom.

710
00:40:19,320 --> 00:40:21,480
Speaker 5: No, he's got his own. He's got his own stash

711
00:40:21,480 --> 00:40:23,919
Speaker 5: of Robert Johnny's as he calls his dad called.

712
00:40:24,080 --> 00:40:27,480
Speaker 1: Wait, the same condoms for the condiments and for the zapathon.

713
00:40:27,640 --> 00:40:32,680
Speaker 5: Well no, because the because the the uh the uh

714
00:40:32,840 --> 00:40:34,239
Speaker 5: spermasotal lubricant.

715
00:40:34,480 --> 00:40:35,719
Speaker 3: Uh.

716
00:40:35,760 --> 00:40:42,600
Speaker 5: At that point I've eaten it, so it's it kind

717
00:40:42,640 --> 00:40:43,960
Speaker 5: of reduces.

718
00:40:43,400 --> 00:40:48,080
Speaker 3: The control has always been an issue for you. I mean,

719
00:40:48,320 --> 00:40:50,040
Speaker 3: I don't know why you can't just stop with the

720
00:40:50,800 --> 00:40:52,880
Speaker 3: with the condiment, Why you have to move on to

721
00:40:53,000 --> 00:40:54,960
Speaker 3: the spermocidal lubricant as well.

722
00:40:55,520 --> 00:41:00,480
Speaker 5: Well, I'll just say the Russian dressing, for a example,

723
00:41:01,280 --> 00:41:04,120
Speaker 5: was so good that I just kind of got a

724
00:41:04,120 --> 00:41:05,320
Speaker 5: little carried away.

725
00:41:06,080 --> 00:41:08,400
Speaker 2: And and you chewed up the condom.

726
00:41:08,840 --> 00:41:13,000
Speaker 5: I chewed up the condom. And then Joe Ingles.

727
00:41:13,640 --> 00:41:18,399
Speaker 3: Was so mad he beat me wow.

728
00:41:18,200 --> 00:41:23,640
Speaker 5: With a deflated basketball that he cuts open and turns

729
00:41:23,680 --> 00:41:24,640
Speaker 5: into a weapon.

730
00:41:26,680 --> 00:41:33,239
Speaker 3: Rah, you took LS the definition of an L Yeah,

731
00:41:33,280 --> 00:41:36,800
Speaker 3: I think you didn't safely take an L one. I did. Yeah,

732
00:41:36,840 --> 00:41:43,120
Speaker 3: So so Tom the Christmas Show, Yes, you were starting

733
00:41:43,120 --> 00:41:44,800
Speaker 3: to do your big pitch.

734
00:41:45,520 --> 00:41:48,319
Speaker 5: Okay, guys, what do we think about when we think

735
00:41:48,360 --> 00:41:50,719
Speaker 5: about Christmas in New York? Because I want to do

736
00:41:51,719 --> 00:41:56,120
Speaker 5: because everybody thinks about you, guys Hollywood. You take the

737
00:41:56,239 --> 00:42:00,359
Speaker 5: Hollywood Handbook. Guys, it's like you take the boys out

738
00:42:00,400 --> 00:42:02,840
Speaker 5: of Hollywood. You still can't take the Hollywood out of

739
00:42:02,880 --> 00:42:03,400
Speaker 5: the boys.

740
00:42:03,719 --> 00:42:07,960
Speaker 3: Right. But we dropped. That's fucking awesome, thank you.

741
00:42:08,080 --> 00:42:11,800
Speaker 2: We dropped before we do anything else. That's fucking awesome.

742
00:42:12,400 --> 00:42:12,759
Speaker 3: Thank you.

743
00:42:13,200 --> 00:42:19,439
Speaker 5: So we take Hayz and Sean for a New York

744
00:42:19,520 --> 00:42:20,480
Speaker 5: City Christmas.

745
00:42:20,920 --> 00:42:23,480
Speaker 2: Right, that's dope. That's dope.

746
00:42:23,920 --> 00:42:28,560
Speaker 5: So you guys go, you guys, go to a pizza place,

747
00:42:28,680 --> 00:42:33,400
Speaker 5: ninety pizza place, right, and you eat the pizza. You

748
00:42:33,440 --> 00:42:38,080
Speaker 5: eat the pizza upside down like it's a Christmas tree,

749
00:42:38,200 --> 00:42:42,720
Speaker 5: Like it's Christmas tree shape. You hold it up crossed

750
00:42:42,719 --> 00:42:44,520
Speaker 5: at the bottom and it looks like a Christmas tree.

751
00:42:44,520 --> 00:42:50,919
Speaker 3: Then right, yeah, and on the show, Yeah, okay, and

752
00:42:50,960 --> 00:42:54,000
Speaker 3: then we eat the whole thing. Eat the whole thing?

753
00:42:54,800 --> 00:42:56,160
Speaker 2: Are we saying upside down and not?

754
00:42:56,280 --> 00:43:01,000
Speaker 3: Thanks? Stranger Things? The stranger I guess we have to

755
00:43:01,040 --> 00:43:03,919
Speaker 3: kind of dance around it. Move if you're involved in this, yes,

756
00:43:03,960 --> 00:43:04,960
Speaker 3: because I don't want to be.

757
00:43:05,080 --> 00:43:06,680
Speaker 5: I do want them in it. There's going to be

758
00:43:06,680 --> 00:43:09,560
Speaker 5: a Stranger Things parody in this thing. I worked good, good,

759
00:43:10,520 --> 00:43:19,600
Speaker 5: but unauthorized, unauthorized. You eat the pizza. Then here comes

760
00:43:19,600 --> 00:43:23,040
Speaker 5: who's coming down the street? Santa Cohn. Here come all

761
00:43:23,040 --> 00:43:26,640
Speaker 5: the Santas right coming down the street. But this is

762
00:43:26,760 --> 00:43:28,960
Speaker 5: and this is gonna be a thing because twenty sixteen

763
00:43:29,120 --> 00:43:33,880
Speaker 5: was a very, very political year. This was one of

764
00:43:33,880 --> 00:43:38,399
Speaker 5: the most political years. Politics is boss in twenty sixteen. Yeah,

765
00:43:38,960 --> 00:43:43,239
Speaker 5: so this is what you Hayes and Sean put on

766
00:43:44,000 --> 00:43:52,960
Speaker 5: an orange Christmas suit just like President Trump, right, Yeah,

767
00:43:53,000 --> 00:43:56,400
Speaker 5: and the hair you put the wig On and you

768
00:43:56,480 --> 00:44:02,200
Speaker 5: guys are Santa Neo con. You have your own Santa Con,

769
00:44:02,320 --> 00:44:04,960
Speaker 5: but it's called Santa Neo Kon. Well, he's not a neocon,

770
00:44:05,000 --> 00:44:07,880
Speaker 5: so that doesn't work normally. Okay, strike that.

771
00:44:08,480 --> 00:44:13,720
Speaker 3: Okay, summer movie people, this is a side in case

772
00:44:13,800 --> 00:44:15,759
Speaker 3: we need it. This is a tom that. You know,

773
00:44:15,800 --> 00:44:18,120
Speaker 3: some people would say that he you know, he's hiring

774
00:44:18,160 --> 00:44:21,360
Speaker 3: a lot of people that are interested in war and

775
00:44:21,400 --> 00:44:23,359
Speaker 3: all that. But your thing is like, just trust him.

776
00:44:23,440 --> 00:44:25,520
Speaker 3: He's not. He knows what he's doing. He's not a

777
00:44:25,600 --> 00:44:26,120
Speaker 3: neo coon.

778
00:44:26,400 --> 00:44:29,680
Speaker 5: Yeah. Well, I mean I talked to Eric Trump, his son,

779
00:44:29,800 --> 00:44:32,439
Speaker 5: about this, and he's not a neokon. According to Eric,

780
00:44:32,640 --> 00:44:34,560
Speaker 5: Yeah he's not. He just said, you know what he

781
00:44:34,560 --> 00:44:37,680
Speaker 5: said to me, watch out, bro, you're gonna have your

782
00:44:37,680 --> 00:44:39,600
Speaker 5: mind blown by what my my pop does.

783
00:44:40,520 --> 00:44:43,759
Speaker 3: Eric had his bachelor party on one of your tours.

784
00:44:43,880 --> 00:44:49,000
Speaker 5: Yes, he did, on the Sully tour. He was super

785
00:44:49,040 --> 00:44:51,520
Speaker 5: pissed when I pushed him into the Hudson when I

786
00:44:51,560 --> 00:44:54,160
Speaker 5: went I wish it was July, and he was like

787
00:44:54,719 --> 00:44:58,080
Speaker 5: what bro, And I pushed him in and then it

788
00:44:58,280 --> 00:45:01,239
Speaker 5: was July too for yes, and he looked at me

789
00:45:01,920 --> 00:45:03,560
Speaker 5: and then I yelled at him birds.

790
00:45:06,200 --> 00:45:08,480
Speaker 1: And now is it a legal thing that you say

791
00:45:08,520 --> 00:45:11,040
Speaker 1: I wish it was July rather than I would have

792
00:45:11,080 --> 00:45:11,799
Speaker 1: done it in July.

793
00:45:12,080 --> 00:45:17,800
Speaker 5: It is, okay, it is were I've learned the dance, now, Sean,

794
00:45:18,160 --> 00:45:20,600
Speaker 5: I've learned the dance. And here's a part of the

795
00:45:20,680 --> 00:45:23,000
Speaker 5: dance that we'll get us in the clear. We won't

796
00:45:23,040 --> 00:45:26,640
Speaker 5: have to pay any licensing on this Bump Bump or

797
00:45:28,000 --> 00:45:35,480
Speaker 5: right summer movies. Right who you're gonna call stranger things

798
00:45:36,960 --> 00:45:42,920
Speaker 5: man and man? And you have the logo, you have

799
00:45:42,960 --> 00:45:46,319
Speaker 5: the note it's through the demic gorgan like the no

800
00:45:46,440 --> 00:45:52,760
Speaker 5: demic gorgans. Okay, right, who you're gonna call stranger.

801
00:45:52,280 --> 00:45:58,520
Speaker 3: Things and stranger things stranger things? Trump wise? You know who?

802
00:45:58,560 --> 00:45:58,960
Speaker 1: I like?

803
00:45:59,760 --> 00:45:59,880
Speaker 3: Who?

804
00:46:00,120 --> 00:46:05,319
Speaker 1: That jaredush push Puffer, you know what I mean?

805
00:46:05,560 --> 00:46:07,319
Speaker 2: Like I like that last name of that.

806
00:46:07,480 --> 00:46:09,840
Speaker 3: Kushner Fela because it sounds like he smokes.

807
00:46:12,040 --> 00:46:15,879
Speaker 5: Yeah, like he's got that sticky icky that uh.

808
00:46:15,800 --> 00:46:19,120
Speaker 1: Like he smoked smokes coushe.

809
00:46:20,440 --> 00:46:23,880
Speaker 3: Okay, So we eat the pizza upside down and then

810
00:46:25,120 --> 00:46:27,400
Speaker 3: you seem like you wanted to reset some of this stuff,

811
00:46:27,480 --> 00:46:30,719
Speaker 3: but it's then coming down.

812
00:46:30,800 --> 00:46:34,000
Speaker 5: Okay, come the sand, here's comes Santa con here comes.

813
00:46:33,719 --> 00:46:36,279
Speaker 3: Santa Con and then one of us or both of

814
00:46:36,320 --> 00:46:39,759
Speaker 3: us is in an orange Santa Trump. Can I say,

815
00:46:39,880 --> 00:46:42,800
Speaker 3: so far this pitch is purely visual.

816
00:46:44,760 --> 00:46:45,280
Speaker 5: Huh.

817
00:46:45,360 --> 00:46:49,000
Speaker 3: There hasn't been a single element of it that that

818
00:46:49,200 --> 00:46:50,720
Speaker 3: can be heard.

819
00:46:52,080 --> 00:46:56,439
Speaker 5: You're right in saying that we could have done all

820
00:46:56,480 --> 00:47:00,440
Speaker 5: of these things without there being any microphone anywhere.

821
00:47:00,520 --> 00:47:03,720
Speaker 3: Right, But that is all we have for the show.

822
00:47:03,840 --> 00:47:06,439
Speaker 3: All we have is sound and so but what you're

823
00:47:06,440 --> 00:47:12,920
Speaker 3: describing is is no sound. Yes, yes, And I guess

824
00:47:12,920 --> 00:47:15,400
Speaker 3: that makes sense. Why why you said I had to

825
00:47:15,480 --> 00:47:19,200
Speaker 3: be here so you could describe something to be visually.

826
00:47:20,000 --> 00:47:22,920
Speaker 3: But but what we would like is like sort of

827
00:47:22,960 --> 00:47:26,680
Speaker 3: like a radio play, you know, like these guys that

828
00:47:26,840 --> 00:47:29,520
Speaker 3: like some of these fun podcasts do like an old

829
00:47:29,640 --> 00:47:31,920
Speaker 3: time story. Okay, here we go.

830
00:47:32,040 --> 00:47:41,000
Speaker 5: Yeah, I don't know, think twenty sixteen, what happened this year? Okay,

831
00:47:41,000 --> 00:47:42,160
Speaker 5: here's how it starts off.

832
00:47:44,120 --> 00:47:49,000
Speaker 3: Welcome to the year. What's that you said here? Yeah,

833
00:47:49,040 --> 00:47:51,239
Speaker 3: whenever you do like an introduction and you say like

834
00:47:52,320 --> 00:47:55,000
Speaker 3: here we go, or like you you sort of put

835
00:47:55,040 --> 00:47:58,840
Speaker 3: Sean back at the beginning, and so you say, like

836
00:47:58,880 --> 00:48:01,440
Speaker 3: continuing with our conversation, and they'll say, oh, I know,

837
00:48:01,560 --> 00:48:02,640
Speaker 3: I've been in this for a while.

838
00:48:02,719 --> 00:48:05,280
Speaker 5: Well, here's a scratch version of how this play can go.

839
00:48:08,440 --> 00:48:08,600
Speaker 1: Two.

840
00:48:10,320 --> 00:48:15,200
Speaker 5: Okay, it was just about that to all the quaintance

841
00:48:15,360 --> 00:48:20,240
Speaker 5: bee friend God, thank God. Twenty and fifteen is gone.

842
00:48:20,560 --> 00:48:24,160
Speaker 5: What a terrible year that was. This year is gonna

843
00:48:24,160 --> 00:48:27,280
Speaker 5: be And this is you two talking. I guess should

844
00:48:27,280 --> 00:48:28,120
Speaker 5: I play both of you?

845
00:48:28,440 --> 00:48:28,680
Speaker 3: Yeah?

846
00:48:28,719 --> 00:48:36,600
Speaker 5: That's okay, all right, Hey, Sean, thank Christ. Twy fifteen

847
00:48:36,719 --> 00:48:43,080
Speaker 5: is gone. That year was a dumpster fire. Huh yeah, Hayes,

848
00:48:43,480 --> 00:48:49,520
Speaker 5: twenty fifteen was just the worst. Well, twenty sixteen is

849
00:48:49,560 --> 00:49:00,319
Speaker 5: gonna be great. Jinging ging ginginginginginging engin ground control to

850
00:49:00,520 --> 00:49:03,920
Speaker 5: may Tom mm.

851
00:49:03,840 --> 00:49:04,600
Speaker 3: Hmm, Hayes.

852
00:49:04,800 --> 00:49:11,319
Speaker 5: David Bowie died. The heat is on, bon on, the

853
00:49:11,360 --> 00:49:16,120
Speaker 5: heat is on. Oh no, Sean, Glenn Fry is dead too,

854
00:49:17,719 --> 00:49:19,400
Speaker 5: is on the street.

855
00:49:20,560 --> 00:49:24,360
Speaker 3: Who else died this year? Prince Prince?

856
00:49:25,600 --> 00:49:29,080
Speaker 5: Mm hmm, Hayes. I thought we could go crazy and

857
00:49:29,120 --> 00:49:41,400
Speaker 5: pay tribute to Prince. That sounds like a great idea, Sean, picture,

858
00:49:41,520 --> 00:49:42,719
Speaker 5: if you wait, you know, what's it?

859
00:49:42,960 --> 00:49:44,040
Speaker 3: See? If you will?

860
00:49:44,080 --> 00:49:44,759
Speaker 5: What is the word?

861
00:49:45,280 --> 00:49:47,600
Speaker 3: Think? If it's not, what is it?

862
00:49:49,040 --> 00:50:01,680
Speaker 5: Well you want to seem like the jokes O think

863
00:50:01,719 --> 00:50:07,520
Speaker 5: if picture you will Ghostbusters the reboot. We've all waited

864
00:50:07,600 --> 00:50:10,440
Speaker 5: far and this is you singing, Sean.

865
00:50:10,760 --> 00:50:12,879
Speaker 3: But now they got rid of.

866
00:50:12,880 --> 00:50:16,480
Speaker 5: Our favorite guys, and now they put for whom in

867
00:50:16,480 --> 00:50:18,600
Speaker 5: in the Ghostbuster's car?

868
00:50:22,600 --> 00:50:23,719
Speaker 3: How can you? How?

869
00:50:24,760 --> 00:50:28,799
Speaker 5: Why would I buy a ticket for a movie that

870
00:50:29,040 --> 00:50:30,600
Speaker 5: used to start dudes?

871
00:50:32,840 --> 00:50:35,840
Speaker 3: Surely it just ends to the middle of a verse.

872
00:50:38,360 --> 00:50:42,440
Speaker 5: I'm Billy, Bill Murray and Dan Akhor it used to

873
00:50:42,520 --> 00:50:46,160
Speaker 5: be in this, but now they're not in it. I

874
00:50:46,200 --> 00:50:48,920
Speaker 5: think that is rude.

875
00:50:49,960 --> 00:50:52,880
Speaker 3: What about my childhood? Do I mentioned my childhood been rude?

876
00:50:53,280 --> 00:50:58,680
Speaker 5: My whole childhood has been ruined. This movie doesn't look

877
00:50:58,760 --> 00:51:04,000
Speaker 5: like it used to. I'm kind of happy that the

878
00:51:04,120 --> 00:51:07,960
Speaker 5: Laura is in this because he's a dude and I

879
00:51:08,000 --> 00:51:13,480
Speaker 5: can relate to dudes like him. Well, that sucked, Okay, strike.

880
00:51:13,239 --> 00:51:19,800
Speaker 3: Out with some some Olympics stuff. Oh yes, okay, and Fidel.

881
00:51:20,040 --> 00:51:22,040
Speaker 3: Maybe about the frigging pool?

882
00:51:22,600 --> 00:51:26,000
Speaker 5: Yeah, okay, let me think what we could do here

883
00:51:26,040 --> 00:51:26,600
Speaker 5: with the pool?

884
00:51:27,280 --> 00:51:27,680
Speaker 3: With it?

885
00:51:27,960 --> 00:51:32,279
Speaker 5: What if it's it'd be like Hayes will do his

886
00:51:32,400 --> 00:51:34,920
Speaker 5: Ryan Lockey impression, right.

887
00:51:36,239 --> 00:51:39,839
Speaker 3: Sick, that's in the pool that I do that. Though

888
00:51:40,000 --> 00:51:42,680
Speaker 3: it's in the pool, my impression is swimming like him.

889
00:51:42,719 --> 00:51:43,840
Speaker 3: It's not like a vocal.

890
00:51:44,040 --> 00:51:44,439
Speaker 5: That's true.

891
00:51:45,160 --> 00:51:51,000
Speaker 1: Hayes has a thing where Lockety confuses zika and zikam

892
00:51:52,160 --> 00:51:56,040
Speaker 1: And it's really funny because, as we all know, Ryan

893
00:51:56,080 --> 00:52:00,239
Speaker 1: Lockey can't read, and Hayes does this very funny.

894
00:52:00,040 --> 00:52:02,200
Speaker 3: Sort of Zika versus I cam thing.

895
00:52:02,880 --> 00:52:07,520
Speaker 1: It's kind of like the George Carlin baseball football riff

896
00:52:07,600 --> 00:52:08,520
Speaker 1: from back in the day.

897
00:52:10,000 --> 00:52:12,640
Speaker 3: Thank you, No, that's Cosby.

898
00:52:12,719 --> 00:52:16,680
Speaker 2: Sorry, no, that's okay, that's good too.

899
00:52:17,239 --> 00:52:20,480
Speaker 3: Hayes does that too. Who else was in that Olympics?

900
00:52:21,520 --> 00:52:26,520
Speaker 3: Who else? Who else did that one? This last Olympics?

901
00:52:27,760 --> 00:52:35,480
Speaker 3: Is that the blade Runner? Oh yeah, okay.

902
00:52:35,160 --> 00:52:42,399
Speaker 5: Okay, picture this Hayes as Ryan Lotty, Hey bro hey,

903
00:52:42,440 --> 00:52:47,760
Speaker 5: blade Runner? You see Sully? Did I didn't see Sully.

904
00:52:48,360 --> 00:52:58,000
Speaker 5: I wish it was July? What push splash birds? This

905
00:52:58,040 --> 00:53:00,319
Speaker 5: is in the pool? This is in the pool. Ryan

906
00:53:00,320 --> 00:53:02,400
Speaker 5: Lockey pushes the blade Runner into the pool.

907
00:53:02,480 --> 00:53:04,880
Speaker 3: Okay, that's good because that matches up as a bunch

908
00:53:04,880 --> 00:53:07,680
Speaker 3: of twenty sixteen things. That's good for us. Yeah, how

909
00:53:07,719 --> 00:53:12,520
Speaker 3: about Bobby or didn't he die? Now? That's hockey, right, Yeah,

910
00:53:12,560 --> 00:53:16,160
Speaker 3: that's hockey. Uh huh? And Fidel? That would it would

911
00:53:16,160 --> 00:53:18,080
Speaker 3: be good to get some Fidel stuff. In there.

912
00:53:18,239 --> 00:53:24,400
Speaker 5: Okay, Fidelston, what about can we get Joe Ingles to

913
00:53:24,480 --> 00:53:26,960
Speaker 5: do some sort of tribute to Fidel Castro? Is that

914
00:53:27,000 --> 00:53:27,960
Speaker 5: going to be pushing it?

915
00:53:28,520 --> 00:53:30,760
Speaker 3: See, he's going to be mad if he's not involved

916
00:53:30,760 --> 00:53:32,040
Speaker 3: in this. Yeah.

917
00:53:32,080 --> 00:53:35,480
Speaker 5: I guess it would be something like, hey, this is

918
00:53:35,560 --> 00:53:40,520
Speaker 5: Joe Ingles from the Utah Jazz. Hey, hey this is

919
00:53:40,560 --> 00:53:45,719
Speaker 5: Joe Ingles All Star, Utah Jazz All Star, assuming he's

920
00:53:45,719 --> 00:53:50,600
Speaker 5: an All Star this February. Huh, Hey, this is Joe

921
00:53:50,719 --> 00:53:54,640
Speaker 5: Ingles Utah Jazz All Star. We sure lost a lot

922
00:53:54,640 --> 00:53:57,680
Speaker 5: of people this year. Some of them were good guys

923
00:53:58,000 --> 00:54:00,560
Speaker 5: and some of them were bad guys. I'd like to

924
00:54:00,560 --> 00:54:03,879
Speaker 5: pay tribute to one good guy and one bad guy.

925
00:54:05,680 --> 00:54:09,640
Speaker 5: The good guy was Fidel Castro. The bad guy was

926
00:54:09,680 --> 00:54:16,720
Speaker 5: Bobby Orr. Because hockey sucks, the basketball hockey basketball rules, Okay,

927
00:54:16,880 --> 00:54:17,640
Speaker 5: I would love to.

928
00:54:18,000 --> 00:54:21,320
Speaker 3: Yeah, I would love to on this show not perpetuate

929
00:54:21,400 --> 00:54:25,000
Speaker 3: the basketball hockey warst. Anything we could do to try

930
00:54:25,040 --> 00:54:28,319
Speaker 3: and get these people to stop fighting, I think is great.

931
00:54:28,360 --> 00:54:31,160
Speaker 3: I'd love to see peace in our time between.

932
00:54:31,840 --> 00:54:37,120
Speaker 1: Two just sports that while I understand that they don't

933
00:54:37,120 --> 00:54:40,719
Speaker 1: get along, I know why ones on ice, ones on

934
00:54:40,840 --> 00:54:42,560
Speaker 1: wood would and ice are opposite.

935
00:54:42,680 --> 00:54:45,400
Speaker 3: Everyone knows that these hockey players.

936
00:54:45,080 --> 00:54:47,120
Speaker 2: Ice, you use wood. If you want to break wood,

937
00:54:47,239 --> 00:54:47,920
Speaker 2: you freeze it.

938
00:54:48,120 --> 00:54:52,400
Speaker 3: These hockey players breaking into basketball games and u spraying

939
00:54:52,400 --> 00:54:54,920
Speaker 3: a hose on the court and then turning up the

940
00:54:54,960 --> 00:54:58,040
Speaker 3: air conditionings of eye that it freezes and then starting

941
00:54:58,080 --> 00:55:01,120
Speaker 3: to play a hockey game, and vice versa. These basketball

942
00:55:01,120 --> 00:55:04,759
Speaker 3: players throwing wood under the side of the ice, under

943
00:55:04,840 --> 00:55:05,360
Speaker 3: the ice.

944
00:55:06,520 --> 00:55:08,440
Speaker 2: Running out of dribbling around on the ice.

945
00:55:08,480 --> 00:55:15,160
Speaker 1: It's it's all disgusting, it's immature behavior. Why can't everybody win?

946
00:55:16,320 --> 00:55:19,200
Speaker 1: I don't want this show to be a part of that. Also,

947
00:55:19,440 --> 00:55:21,759
Speaker 1: you know, you you kind of with the Joe English thing,

948
00:55:21,840 --> 00:55:24,719
Speaker 1: are stepping on the in memoriam that we do at

949
00:55:24,760 --> 00:55:27,480
Speaker 1: the end of our Christmas special kind of the Oscar

950
00:55:27,560 --> 00:55:31,279
Speaker 1: style and memoriam. And I just have a note from

951
00:55:31,320 --> 00:55:34,680
Speaker 1: Earwolf that even though Prince and David Bowie and Fidel

952
00:55:34,760 --> 00:55:37,879
Speaker 1: Castro and Bobby or are all big celebrities, Glen Fry,

953
00:55:38,400 --> 00:55:40,160
Speaker 1: the final spot does.

954
00:55:39,960 --> 00:55:42,520
Speaker 2: Belong to the company bag big TV show. That does

955
00:55:42,600 --> 00:55:44,080
Speaker 2: have to be the last thing you do on the

956
00:55:44,120 --> 00:55:44,920
Speaker 2: in memoriam.

957
00:55:45,040 --> 00:55:50,440
Speaker 5: So just that's a production no, okay, So the in

958
00:55:50,600 --> 00:55:54,839
Speaker 5: memoriam would be like, hey, guys, it's me Hayes, and

959
00:55:54,880 --> 00:55:58,120
Speaker 5: it's me Sean. I know we had a lot of

960
00:55:58,120 --> 00:56:04,840
Speaker 5: fun here on the Hollywood Handbook Christmas two sixteen Special

961
00:56:06,680 --> 00:56:09,080
Speaker 5: twenty sixteen Extravaganza.

962
00:56:09,160 --> 00:56:14,560
Speaker 3: Hayes, that's good, but we uh I'm correcting him or

963
00:56:14,600 --> 00:56:18,239
Speaker 3: what hery just being kind of a devilish Yeah, like

964
00:56:18,320 --> 00:56:21,240
Speaker 3: an imp Yeah, a devilish impure.

965
00:56:22,640 --> 00:56:27,120
Speaker 5: Okay, So yeah, that's right, Sean. It's a two thousand

966
00:56:27,320 --> 00:56:34,280
Speaker 5: is a Christmas extravaganza. My bad, You're forgiven. But let's

967
00:56:34,280 --> 00:56:38,279
Speaker 5: not forget the friends that we lost this year. So

968
00:56:38,400 --> 00:56:49,160
Speaker 5: many great people like Bobby or Fidel Castro, Glenn Fry,

969
00:56:50,520 --> 00:56:59,720
Speaker 5: Leonard Cohen, David Bowie, Vanity, Uh who else?

970
00:57:01,680 --> 00:57:07,879
Speaker 3: I know there was who else? Group lost? Groot? Yeah,

971
00:57:07,960 --> 00:57:08,640
Speaker 3: group blew.

972
00:57:08,560 --> 00:57:15,440
Speaker 5: Up at the end of the movie Groot, the ancient one.

973
00:57:18,120 --> 00:57:20,960
Speaker 3: She died in. Uh yeah, Doctor Strange.

974
00:57:21,000 --> 00:57:25,320
Speaker 5: Yeah, and don't and don't forget there.

975
00:57:25,360 --> 00:57:27,960
Speaker 2: Doctor Stranger sings viral video that we put.

976
00:57:28,760 --> 00:57:33,400
Speaker 5: There we go, There we go. That's that's great, Doctor Stranger.

977
00:57:33,480 --> 00:57:35,480
Speaker 5: But I think we already have the who you're gonna

978
00:57:35,480 --> 00:57:39,439
Speaker 5: call Stranger? That that's like a foot race.

979
00:57:39,520 --> 00:57:45,320
Speaker 6: Now, well, who you gonna call doctor structor stranger things.

980
00:57:45,280 --> 00:57:51,000
Speaker 5: Or what if it's like an old fashioned skit like like, uh, doctor,

981
00:57:51,120 --> 00:57:54,720
Speaker 5: you gotta help me, and then he's like, uh, let

982
00:57:54,720 --> 00:57:58,880
Speaker 5: me check you out upside down right, and then he

983
00:57:58,960 --> 00:58:04,760
Speaker 5: goes the moons of metropor tell me that you've got

984
00:58:05,680 --> 00:58:08,920
Speaker 5: stuff coming out of your lungs because you were in

985
00:58:08,960 --> 00:58:09,920
Speaker 5: the upside down?

986
00:58:11,800 --> 00:58:14,520
Speaker 1: Did you had a whole thing where eleven would kind

987
00:58:14,520 --> 00:58:17,040
Speaker 1: of would call everybody a Benedict Cumber bitch.

988
00:58:18,040 --> 00:58:19,120
Speaker 5: I like that.

989
00:58:19,160 --> 00:58:21,320
Speaker 3: That's because everybody.

990
00:58:20,960 --> 00:58:26,280
Speaker 2: Yeah, and that was the Benedict Cumber bitch.

991
00:58:28,040 --> 00:58:33,720
Speaker 3: Is BB eight of this and Baby group, baby Groot?

992
00:58:33,960 --> 00:58:36,640
Speaker 5: I don't know if baby Groot, Look, I think we

993
00:58:36,760 --> 00:58:42,320
Speaker 5: might have to wait baby the baby group. Yeah, if

994
00:58:42,320 --> 00:58:44,040
Speaker 5: baby groups right, and then all of a sudden, like

995
00:58:44,640 --> 00:58:45,640
Speaker 5: a rocket, we can.

996
00:58:45,560 --> 00:58:47,600
Speaker 3: Scoop them on this. It hasn't come out yet. We

997
00:58:47,920 --> 00:58:51,640
Speaker 3: are going we could honestly do Baby group first, Get off.

998
00:58:51,480 --> 00:58:57,960
Speaker 5: That robot, right, rocket raccoon, Hey, get off that robot?

999
00:58:58,200 --> 00:58:59,000
Speaker 3: Baby groot?

1000
00:59:00,400 --> 00:59:05,040
Speaker 5: What are you doing? The tribute at the end should

1001
00:59:05,080 --> 00:59:15,200
Speaker 5: be But the biggest loss we had this year is obvious. Yeah,

1002
00:59:15,240 --> 00:59:21,600
Speaker 5: it sure is. Hayes Comedy Bang Bang TV Show five

1003
00:59:21,680 --> 00:59:23,680
Speaker 5: seasons gone, too soon.

1004
00:59:25,400 --> 00:59:30,360
Speaker 3: I'm sad some of your favorite episodes would be good.

1005
00:59:30,440 --> 00:59:32,280
Speaker 3: I mean just to like and.

1006
00:59:32,280 --> 00:59:40,240
Speaker 5: Then will rebu you right? And then a montage of

1007
00:59:40,320 --> 00:59:45,960
Speaker 5: every thirty seconds from every episode.

1008
00:59:45,640 --> 00:59:48,160
Speaker 3: And it's slow boach because it's like in slow motion,

1009
00:59:48,760 --> 00:59:51,439
Speaker 3: So it's thirty seconds from the episode, but each takes

1010
00:59:51,520 --> 00:59:53,920
Speaker 3: ninety seconds, Yeah.

1011
00:59:53,720 --> 00:59:57,520
Speaker 5: Thirty seconds from each episode slowed down at one third,

1012
00:59:57,920 --> 01:00:01,640
Speaker 5: So it's ninety seconds plus a plus a title card

1013
01:00:01,680 --> 01:00:06,120
Speaker 5: that explains which each episode in order is. If it's like,

1014
01:00:06,240 --> 01:00:10,480
Speaker 5: you know, Zach Alfanakis wears a hoodie, Yeah, episode one

1015
01:00:10,480 --> 01:00:14,160
Speaker 5: O two and the title those cards are slowed down also,

1016
01:00:14,680 --> 01:00:16,280
Speaker 5: so those cards are on screen first.

1017
01:00:16,360 --> 01:00:22,360
Speaker 1: And can I say in between the images, because you

1018
01:00:22,400 --> 01:00:25,040
Speaker 1: can't hear the dialogue when it's going that slow, we

1019
01:00:25,120 --> 01:00:28,280
Speaker 1: are going to have text on the screen, you know,

1020
01:00:29,560 --> 01:00:32,360
Speaker 1: with like sort of a transcription of what they were

1021
01:00:32,400 --> 01:00:35,040
Speaker 1: saying in the scene. So and that's probably going to

1022
01:00:35,080 --> 01:00:36,640
Speaker 1: take about ninety seconds as well.

1023
01:00:37,120 --> 01:00:38,520
Speaker 3: Sure, And.

1024
01:00:40,160 --> 01:00:42,720
Speaker 5: Is there any chance I know this wasn't an episode?

1025
01:00:42,800 --> 01:00:46,000
Speaker 5: Can we at least cobble this together and post because

1026
01:00:46,040 --> 01:00:49,680
Speaker 5: he's gonna beat me with that deflated cut basketball?

1027
01:00:49,840 --> 01:00:53,200
Speaker 3: Can I how that how he manages to turn that

1028
01:00:53,280 --> 01:00:56,040
Speaker 3: into a weapon by cutting a basketball.

1029
01:00:55,440 --> 01:00:58,520
Speaker 5: Open because he cut finger holes in it too. Wow,

1030
01:00:58,560 --> 01:01:00,880
Speaker 5: So it's like you can whip it all over the place,

1031
01:01:01,280 --> 01:01:04,920
Speaker 5: and he goes, you'd have to get.

1032
01:01:04,920 --> 01:01:08,240
Speaker 3: A right when fingerholes.

1033
01:01:08,280 --> 01:01:10,240
Speaker 1: I thought that it's like a glove, like it's it's

1034
01:01:10,400 --> 01:01:13,120
Speaker 1: and this is terrible, but just maybe what Joe Ingles

1035
01:01:13,120 --> 01:01:15,440
Speaker 1: would call it is like basque knuckles.

1036
01:01:17,800 --> 01:01:21,680
Speaker 5: He just he just basketball knuckles. Yeah, he just says

1037
01:01:21,680 --> 01:01:25,000
Speaker 5: it's time. That is all he says. He doesn't even

1038
01:01:25,040 --> 01:01:27,800
Speaker 5: have a play of words. But he'll beat me with

1039
01:01:27,840 --> 01:01:32,600
Speaker 5: that thing. If we don't fake a Joe Ingles episode

1040
01:01:32,640 --> 01:01:35,920
Speaker 5: of comedy Bagman, like Joe Ingles wears a Utah jazz

1041
01:01:36,040 --> 01:01:36,800
Speaker 5: road jersey.

1042
01:01:37,320 --> 01:01:39,520
Speaker 3: I guess we get to show a clip a clip

1043
01:01:39,560 --> 01:01:44,080
Speaker 3: of him playing and a gabe. Sure, I'd say that

1044
01:01:44,160 --> 01:01:46,760
Speaker 3: it's a comedy bag bag episode.

1045
01:01:47,800 --> 01:01:52,800
Speaker 5: Ingles inbounds and that's like what you see.

1046
01:01:52,840 --> 01:01:54,120
Speaker 3: Does he ever do the inbound?

1047
01:01:55,640 --> 01:01:57,120
Speaker 5: Yeah he will, because you know you gotta want to

1048
01:01:57,160 --> 01:02:00,480
Speaker 5: throw it back out to sew and you always got

1049
01:02:00,520 --> 01:02:04,480
Speaker 5: to watch out for the guy inbounding. You always got

1050
01:02:04,480 --> 01:02:05,840
Speaker 5: to watch out for the guy inbounding.

1051
01:02:07,000 --> 01:02:13,240
Speaker 3: They give it right, yeah, Ingles for three Yes, and

1052
01:02:13,440 --> 01:02:18,560
Speaker 3: the fowl Les Watts or whatever.

1053
01:02:19,200 --> 01:02:23,880
Speaker 5: Yeah, right, can they do that Joe Ingles whereas the

1054
01:02:24,000 --> 01:02:27,280
Speaker 5: Utah Jazz Rose Road Jersey and say that was the

1055
01:02:27,280 --> 01:02:30,160
Speaker 5: final episode Ingles inbounds.

1056
01:02:30,480 --> 01:02:37,600
Speaker 3: Yeah, so the whole episode is, yes, are we still

1057
01:02:37,640 --> 01:02:39,640
Speaker 3: eating the slice of pizza upside down to start?

1058
01:02:40,080 --> 01:02:42,680
Speaker 5: And it's going to be pesto also pizza that way,

1059
01:02:42,680 --> 01:02:44,160
Speaker 5: it's like a Christmas tree.

1060
01:02:44,280 --> 01:02:46,080
Speaker 3: Okay, but some of that is going to be falling

1061
01:02:46,120 --> 01:02:48,920
Speaker 3: off when we turn it upside that, yeah, most of it.

1062
01:02:48,800 --> 01:02:51,560
Speaker 5: Is, or unless we make it cold pizza that way,

1063
01:02:51,600 --> 01:02:53,840
Speaker 5: it'll be it won't be crossed up.

1064
01:02:53,920 --> 01:02:56,000
Speaker 3: Yeah, okay, that can just be a little trick for us.

1065
01:02:56,160 --> 01:02:57,080
Speaker 3: They don't know it's cold.

1066
01:02:57,160 --> 01:02:58,760
Speaker 5: We'll fake props will figure that out.

1067
01:02:59,360 --> 01:03:02,320
Speaker 3: And so then we hear the songs of the different

1068
01:03:02,360 --> 01:03:04,800
Speaker 3: people who die, and then we say, oh, no, they died,

1069
01:03:05,160 --> 01:03:06,800
Speaker 3: and we know that because we heard their.

1070
01:03:06,760 --> 01:03:10,960
Speaker 5: Song because their songs start playing, okay. And then you

1071
01:03:11,000 --> 01:03:14,360
Speaker 5: guys look and you're in front of the Macy's window, right,

1072
01:03:15,000 --> 01:03:19,480
Speaker 5: oh wow, okay, yeah, and then you're just like, I

1073
01:03:19,520 --> 01:03:22,840
Speaker 5: think I understand the true Hey, Sean, I think I

1074
01:03:22,920 --> 01:03:24,960
Speaker 5: understand the true spirit of Christmas.

1075
01:03:25,760 --> 01:03:26,680
Speaker 3: What's that? Hay?

1076
01:03:30,000 --> 01:03:33,400
Speaker 5: Just chilling with a good friend and buying them a

1077
01:03:33,480 --> 01:03:39,680
Speaker 5: nice present. That's hmmm, that's what's crack alakin.

1078
01:03:43,960 --> 01:03:47,320
Speaker 1: And then as either of us eating like a condom

1079
01:03:47,360 --> 01:03:51,919
Speaker 1: full of like, uh, you know, that's good.

1080
01:03:52,000 --> 01:03:53,720
Speaker 3: That's good. You'll see, you'll see.

1081
01:03:54,160 --> 01:03:56,640
Speaker 5: Then then it's like you hear in the background a

1082
01:03:56,800 --> 01:04:01,960
Speaker 5: vendor like a street a street food guy going condoms

1083
01:04:02,040 --> 01:04:10,120
Speaker 5: full sirocha conto. Hey, buddy, you want a condom full

1084
01:04:10,120 --> 01:04:10,760
Speaker 5: of siracha.

1085
01:04:12,600 --> 01:04:19,600
Speaker 3: Uh hm hmm, sounds good. Hayes, We'll split one, two straws.

1086
01:04:21,320 --> 01:04:31,720
Speaker 3: Yeah bye.

1087
01:04:34,160 --> 01:04:38,080
Speaker 1: Hollywood Handbook is brought to you by Wolf Cool Production

1088
01:04:38,240 --> 01:04:47,840
Speaker 1: to subsidiary of Calvinibs Ow Baby