1 00:00:02,720 --> 00:00:05,880 Speaker 1: Hi. This is Laura Vandercamp. I'm a mother of five, 2 00:00:06,160 --> 00:00:10,240 Speaker 1: an author, journalist, and speaker. And this is Sarah hart Unger. 3 00:00:10,480 --> 00:00:13,480 Speaker 1: I'm a mother of three, a practicing physician and blogger. 4 00:00:13,480 --> 00:00:15,800 Speaker 1: On the side, we are two working parents who love 5 00:00:15,840 --> 00:00:19,320 Speaker 1: our careers and our families. Welcome to best of both worlds. 6 00:00:19,600 --> 00:00:22,400 Speaker 1: Here we talk about how real women manage work, family, 7 00:00:22,560 --> 00:00:25,800 Speaker 1: and time for fun, from figuring out childcare to mapping 8 00:00:25,800 --> 00:00:28,360 Speaker 1: out long term career goals. We want you to get 9 00:00:28,400 --> 00:00:34,000 Speaker 1: the most out of life. Welcome to best of both worlds, 10 00:00:34,080 --> 00:00:37,160 Speaker 1: this says Laura. This is episode one hundred and sixty seven, 11 00:00:37,200 --> 00:00:40,159 Speaker 1: which is first airing in mid October. We are going 12 00:00:40,240 --> 00:00:43,839 Speaker 1: to be talking about ten good things apiece, in addition 13 00:00:44,040 --> 00:00:47,000 Speaker 1: to a few other random topics, because that's what we 14 00:00:47,080 --> 00:00:51,280 Speaker 1: do in episodes that are just LV plus shoe episodes. 15 00:00:51,600 --> 00:00:53,840 Speaker 1: We've heard from you guys that you like these, which 16 00:00:53,920 --> 00:00:56,480 Speaker 1: is great. I mean, I feel like we have awesome guests, 17 00:00:56,520 --> 00:01:00,000 Speaker 1: but people still seem to like our having conversations as well. 18 00:01:00,200 --> 00:01:03,200 Speaker 1: So we'll try to have a structured conversation or maybe 19 00:01:03,200 --> 00:01:05,240 Speaker 1: it'll go completely off the rails. Hard to really know. 20 00:01:05,600 --> 00:01:08,440 Speaker 1: How's it going for you? Sarah, it's going pretty well. 21 00:01:08,760 --> 00:01:11,160 Speaker 1: I was just I was gonna name this episode good Things, 22 00:01:11,200 --> 00:01:14,280 Speaker 1: and I'm like, maybe Martha Stewart has trademarked she might 23 00:01:14,360 --> 00:01:19,080 Speaker 1: have that's true good things, so better things, best things, awesome, 24 00:01:19,240 --> 00:01:27,000 Speaker 1: bobw things. So you guys are actually Annabel's going back 25 00:01:27,000 --> 00:01:30,000 Speaker 1: to real real but like, yeah, that's school at the 26 00:01:30,080 --> 00:01:33,600 Speaker 1: end of October, right, that's uh, well, actually there's been 27 00:01:33,600 --> 00:01:35,920 Speaker 1: a development, which is that now we might have to 28 00:01:36,000 --> 00:01:38,560 Speaker 1: rush back next week because of some state thing, and 29 00:01:38,640 --> 00:01:41,120 Speaker 1: like the school is freaking out because they had planned 30 00:01:41,160 --> 00:01:42,920 Speaker 1: on a date in mid October, like they had set 31 00:01:42,920 --> 00:01:45,480 Speaker 1: it up and done all this careful planning and they 32 00:01:45,480 --> 00:01:47,880 Speaker 1: were going to send the kindergarteners in I think k 33 00:01:48,000 --> 00:01:49,840 Speaker 1: through second. I don't know, it did include Anabel's class, 34 00:01:49,840 --> 00:01:52,080 Speaker 1: so I didn't pay attention first for a week and 35 00:01:52,120 --> 00:01:54,160 Speaker 1: then bring in the older kids the next week. And 36 00:01:54,200 --> 00:01:56,520 Speaker 1: then apparently there's like this mandate from the government that 37 00:01:56,560 --> 00:01:59,960 Speaker 1: we cannot get an exception, so it maybe even earlier, 38 00:02:00,600 --> 00:02:03,200 Speaker 1: but we will see. So this is the funny part 39 00:02:03,240 --> 00:02:05,960 Speaker 1: about it is that well not funny, but I think 40 00:02:05,960 --> 00:02:07,800 Speaker 1: it is playing out this way in some other schools. 41 00:02:07,840 --> 00:02:11,840 Speaker 1: But it's online school at school. Yeah, and they actually 42 00:02:11,840 --> 00:02:18,080 Speaker 1: have a slogan. It's called walk in, log in Learn. 43 00:02:19,160 --> 00:02:24,520 Speaker 1: Well that's something because they're trying to keep it consistent. 44 00:02:24,560 --> 00:02:26,240 Speaker 1: So if they have to shut down again, it's just 45 00:02:26,280 --> 00:02:28,760 Speaker 1: like the same stuff that they were doing. Interesting, and 46 00:02:28,800 --> 00:02:30,519 Speaker 1: they want to be able to have the teacher well 47 00:02:30,560 --> 00:02:33,280 Speaker 1: because they're offering it as an option for students to 48 00:02:33,280 --> 00:02:36,360 Speaker 1: come in person. There's still some families are choosing to 49 00:02:36,440 --> 00:02:39,160 Speaker 1: stay home, and actually many people that I know are 50 00:02:39,240 --> 00:02:41,680 Speaker 1: choosing that option, which is fine because then the school 51 00:02:41,680 --> 00:02:44,840 Speaker 1: will be even less crowded, which is great. So that 52 00:02:44,880 --> 00:02:48,320 Speaker 1: way the teachers can continue to teach both habs of 53 00:02:48,360 --> 00:02:51,120 Speaker 1: the class simultaneously. It was funny because there was languages 54 00:02:51,160 --> 00:02:54,160 Speaker 1: that said something like in some cases the students may 55 00:02:54,240 --> 00:02:57,560 Speaker 1: choose to watch their teacher like live. I'm like, they're 56 00:02:57,560 --> 00:03:00,280 Speaker 1: going to be standing in front of like no, no no, 57 00:03:00,400 --> 00:03:01,839 Speaker 1: I'm just gonna stare at my screen. I'm not looking 58 00:03:01,880 --> 00:03:08,519 Speaker 1: at you. So we'll see how that goes. Yeah, yeah, 59 00:03:09,040 --> 00:03:12,280 Speaker 1: that's interesting. So the way we're doing it here, which 60 00:03:12,320 --> 00:03:14,520 Speaker 1: when this airs we will be sort of one week 61 00:03:14,560 --> 00:03:19,959 Speaker 1: into our return to hybrid school, is they have it 62 00:03:20,040 --> 00:03:22,640 Speaker 1: split in cohorts. We are in the morning cohort for 63 00:03:22,680 --> 00:03:25,600 Speaker 1: elementary school, so the kids will go in the morning, 64 00:03:26,480 --> 00:03:30,440 Speaker 1: they will have you know, live teacher teaching. They're supposed 65 00:03:30,440 --> 00:03:33,200 Speaker 1: to bring their chromebooks, but they're supposed to have live 66 00:03:33,240 --> 00:03:35,320 Speaker 1: teacher teaching and then do when they come home in 67 00:03:35,360 --> 00:03:40,280 Speaker 1: the afternoon do the asynchronous assignment. So there's no synchronous 68 00:03:41,320 --> 00:03:44,800 Speaker 1: virtual learning going on anymore. After they start back up 69 00:03:44,920 --> 00:03:48,200 Speaker 1: in person, so you know that that sort of makes sense. 70 00:03:48,240 --> 00:03:50,640 Speaker 1: The teacher teaches a full day of on you know, 71 00:03:50,720 --> 00:03:54,200 Speaker 1: in live person classes, they just teach the same half 72 00:03:54,560 --> 00:03:58,360 Speaker 1: both times, and then the kids are doing their assignments 73 00:03:58,360 --> 00:04:02,480 Speaker 1: that they've put on Google classroom or blackboard. So does 74 00:04:02,560 --> 00:04:04,480 Speaker 1: that mean it will be a short day, like four 75 00:04:04,520 --> 00:04:07,080 Speaker 1: hour day or well, yeah, so, I mean what it 76 00:04:07,120 --> 00:04:10,960 Speaker 1: means is that my kids will come home probably on 77 00:04:10,960 --> 00:04:13,680 Speaker 1: the bus eleven fifty. They'll get home twelve fifteen or so, 78 00:04:13,760 --> 00:04:16,920 Speaker 1: have lunch, and then they will be responsible for their 79 00:04:16,960 --> 00:04:21,040 Speaker 1: assignments in the afternoon, which judging how this is gone, 80 00:04:21,040 --> 00:04:23,840 Speaker 1: means they'll be done in another like half hour. So 81 00:04:24,720 --> 00:04:28,440 Speaker 1: oh well, they can entertain themselves, but our activities are 82 00:04:28,440 --> 00:04:30,080 Speaker 1: starting up again and everything, so it's not like they 83 00:04:30,080 --> 00:04:31,600 Speaker 1: have nothing else going on the rest of the day, 84 00:04:31,640 --> 00:04:35,240 Speaker 1: so I guess it'll just be some extra downtime. I 85 00:04:35,240 --> 00:04:40,040 Speaker 1: hope they offer some childcare for some families. I don't know. 86 00:04:40,360 --> 00:04:42,479 Speaker 1: I don't know what they're doing. I mean, you know, 87 00:04:43,080 --> 00:04:45,600 Speaker 1: the middle school when they go back to hybrid, which 88 00:04:45,640 --> 00:04:48,080 Speaker 1: will be the week after this when it's theirs, they 89 00:04:48,120 --> 00:04:51,760 Speaker 1: will be doing two full days a week. So I 90 00:04:51,800 --> 00:04:56,279 Speaker 1: think Josper's going Monday and Wednesday. Other people go Tuesday, Thursday, 91 00:04:56,480 --> 00:05:00,560 Speaker 1: and then Friday will be the everybody in a day 92 00:05:00,680 --> 00:05:02,880 Speaker 1: or something. So I sort of think about they're like, well, 93 00:05:02,880 --> 00:05:04,640 Speaker 1: if the kids get the assignments done early, I guess 94 00:05:04,640 --> 00:05:07,200 Speaker 1: we could start like trying to do weekend trips or something, 95 00:05:07,480 --> 00:05:11,320 Speaker 1: you know, because you can leave early on Friday. So 96 00:05:11,360 --> 00:05:13,839 Speaker 1: there you go. Well, yeah, it's interesting because that that 97 00:05:13,920 --> 00:05:16,719 Speaker 1: certainly solves the problem of education, Like it sounds like, 98 00:05:16,960 --> 00:05:18,360 Speaker 1: you know, your kids will be able to get that 99 00:05:18,480 --> 00:05:21,359 Speaker 1: good live education again, But it definitely doesn't solve the 100 00:05:21,360 --> 00:05:24,400 Speaker 1: logistical nightmare for a lot of people. Whereas one will 101 00:05:24,440 --> 00:05:27,599 Speaker 1: give them credit, like they are dedicated to like having 102 00:05:28,080 --> 00:05:30,200 Speaker 1: a place for kids to go during school hours for 103 00:05:30,240 --> 00:05:33,680 Speaker 1: anybody that wants, which is wonderful, and I wish that 104 00:05:33,760 --> 00:05:38,240 Speaker 1: our district would think harder about that, because it's you know, 105 00:05:38,279 --> 00:05:41,839 Speaker 1: it's obviously it's a kind of ritzy district, but that 106 00:05:41,839 --> 00:05:44,560 Speaker 1: doesn't mean that everybody has, you know, the money to 107 00:05:44,640 --> 00:05:46,800 Speaker 1: cover it, or a stay at home parent or whatever 108 00:05:46,839 --> 00:05:48,880 Speaker 1: it is that they've chosen to and you know, invest 109 00:05:48,920 --> 00:05:57,120 Speaker 1: that money in. And so, yeah, it's all crazy, but 110 00:05:57,160 --> 00:05:59,600 Speaker 1: we're going to move to good things. Good thing this 111 00:05:59,640 --> 00:06:03,440 Speaker 1: episod that is supposed to be good things. Well, you know, 112 00:06:03,640 --> 00:06:07,920 Speaker 1: you said you were finding things that are better and 113 00:06:07,920 --> 00:06:10,280 Speaker 1: more efficient than they were in the That was funny 114 00:06:10,279 --> 00:06:12,080 Speaker 1: because I was I was coming up with ten good things, 115 00:06:12,080 --> 00:06:13,920 Speaker 1: and I was thinking we would do ten all together, 116 00:06:14,000 --> 00:06:16,600 Speaker 1: but I started brainstorming good things and apparently I actually 117 00:06:16,640 --> 00:06:18,120 Speaker 1: came up with ten. So there are a lot of 118 00:06:18,120 --> 00:06:21,919 Speaker 1: good things right now, not necessarily pandemic related, but just 119 00:06:22,680 --> 00:06:28,200 Speaker 1: pandemic adjacent because we're all alongside that right now, So 120 00:06:28,720 --> 00:06:31,000 Speaker 1: why not we'll jump into some of them. So the 121 00:06:31,040 --> 00:06:33,520 Speaker 1: thing that made me actually so my brain my idea 122 00:06:33,680 --> 00:06:37,279 Speaker 1: came after finishing a two hour long meeting that I 123 00:06:37,279 --> 00:06:40,440 Speaker 1: had kind of been dreading a little bit but turned 124 00:06:40,440 --> 00:06:44,320 Speaker 1: out to have gone really really well. So, as you guys, know, 125 00:06:44,360 --> 00:06:46,840 Speaker 1: I want half of my clinical jobs that I'm a 126 00:06:46,880 --> 00:06:49,760 Speaker 1: residency program director. We now have twenty four residents, so 127 00:06:49,760 --> 00:06:52,080 Speaker 1: it's like big time. We have all of them, eight 128 00:06:52,120 --> 00:06:55,919 Speaker 1: in each class, and every three months we have this 129 00:06:55,960 --> 00:06:59,040 Speaker 1: big faculty meeting that we run. Actually the associate program 130 00:06:59,040 --> 00:07:00,920 Speaker 1: director kind of run the show, which is great because 131 00:07:00,920 --> 00:07:02,120 Speaker 1: I don't have to do that anymore. I get to 132 00:07:02,160 --> 00:07:05,599 Speaker 1: just like watch and we all review every resident and 133 00:07:05,680 --> 00:07:08,120 Speaker 1: so like the you know, the er representatives there and 134 00:07:08,160 --> 00:07:09,800 Speaker 1: like the NIKU person's there, and we all like just 135 00:07:09,800 --> 00:07:12,040 Speaker 1: talk about each one. We focus on the problems, but 136 00:07:12,080 --> 00:07:14,160 Speaker 1: we we kind of you know, review every resident in 137 00:07:14,200 --> 00:07:16,760 Speaker 1: their progress. And I always was thinking, like, oh, this 138 00:07:16,800 --> 00:07:18,200 Speaker 1: is going to be insane when we get to twenty 139 00:07:18,200 --> 00:07:19,760 Speaker 1: four residents. This is the first year we've had our 140 00:07:19,800 --> 00:07:23,480 Speaker 1: full compliment, and it's also the first year we're doing 141 00:07:23,480 --> 00:07:25,720 Speaker 1: them completely online. We had one online one at the 142 00:07:25,760 --> 00:07:27,280 Speaker 1: end of last year, but I felt like it wasn't 143 00:07:27,280 --> 00:07:28,640 Speaker 1: like a real one. It was sort of like we 144 00:07:28,640 --> 00:07:31,120 Speaker 1: were just getting through it. But actually it was super 145 00:07:31,120 --> 00:07:34,040 Speaker 1: well organized. I felt like everyone was engaged the fact 146 00:07:34,040 --> 00:07:36,000 Speaker 1: that it was online and we didn't even use video 147 00:07:36,080 --> 00:07:38,320 Speaker 1: because it's just not the custom at my institution, which 148 00:07:38,360 --> 00:07:40,360 Speaker 1: is interesting. We were all looking at the screen and 149 00:07:40,400 --> 00:07:42,480 Speaker 1: the dashboards for each resident, and I was taking like 150 00:07:42,560 --> 00:07:44,720 Speaker 1: furious notes on a word document because I was actually 151 00:07:44,800 --> 00:07:47,760 Speaker 1: able to like kind of get some of the quotes 152 00:07:48,040 --> 00:07:50,440 Speaker 1: from the faculty, which I usually have trouble doing because 153 00:07:50,440 --> 00:07:53,880 Speaker 1: I'm also kind of there. And I actually felt like 154 00:07:53,920 --> 00:07:57,200 Speaker 1: it went more efficiently and better than it ever has 155 00:07:57,200 --> 00:07:59,640 Speaker 1: in person. And I'm sure it was much less disruptive 156 00:07:59,680 --> 00:08:02,200 Speaker 1: to most people's schedules because we started at twelve thirty 157 00:08:02,520 --> 00:08:05,160 Speaker 1: finished at two thirty. You know, yes, people started their 158 00:08:05,160 --> 00:08:07,400 Speaker 1: afternoon clinics a little bit late if they're outpatient, but 159 00:08:07,680 --> 00:08:10,640 Speaker 1: you know, without travel time. I think I think it 160 00:08:10,680 --> 00:08:13,640 Speaker 1: was better on every level. So the APD and I 161 00:08:13,680 --> 00:08:16,400 Speaker 1: talked after, We're like, we're keeping it like this, Yeah, 162 00:08:16,760 --> 00:08:20,960 Speaker 1: no need to go back. Yeah, so that's true. That 163 00:08:21,040 --> 00:08:22,800 Speaker 1: was my first good thing. I just think, I think, 164 00:08:23,240 --> 00:08:25,440 Speaker 1: and I think I've complained about like zoom meetings and 165 00:08:25,480 --> 00:08:27,520 Speaker 1: they're not always fun, and I will say the unfun 166 00:08:27,640 --> 00:08:29,840 Speaker 1: kind or the kind we're like I'm addressing a group 167 00:08:29,880 --> 00:08:31,520 Speaker 1: and I'm like waiting for their feedback and I can't 168 00:08:31,520 --> 00:08:33,600 Speaker 1: see anybody's face, Like that's a little bit rough, but 169 00:08:33,600 --> 00:08:35,800 Speaker 1: when you have a shared purpose like we did, like 170 00:08:36,120 --> 00:08:37,839 Speaker 1: we're going to cover ex material or we're going to 171 00:08:37,920 --> 00:08:40,760 Speaker 1: go through every resident and talk about them, it kind 172 00:08:40,760 --> 00:08:43,520 Speaker 1: of works well. So and I feel like we've actually 173 00:08:43,520 --> 00:08:47,679 Speaker 1: gotten better and better at it throughout this pandemic. It 174 00:08:47,760 --> 00:08:51,080 Speaker 1: turns out that working from home is a skill you 175 00:08:51,120 --> 00:08:53,720 Speaker 1: can get Rebeldy, Yeah, you can get better at it 176 00:08:53,760 --> 00:08:56,520 Speaker 1: through through practice and and so you know, in March, 177 00:08:56,520 --> 00:08:58,160 Speaker 1: a lot of people were like, oh, this is terrible, 178 00:08:58,160 --> 00:08:59,800 Speaker 1: it's hard, or you know, I can't figure it out. 179 00:08:59,800 --> 00:09:01,079 Speaker 1: How we ever going to do this? It's like, well, 180 00:09:01,120 --> 00:09:03,079 Speaker 1: because you haven't you know, And it's like, you know, 181 00:09:03,160 --> 00:09:05,319 Speaker 1: trying to play basketball and you've never played basketball, and 182 00:09:05,600 --> 00:09:08,040 Speaker 1: by six months in of practicing basketball every day, you're 183 00:09:08,080 --> 00:09:10,800 Speaker 1: going to be fairly decent. So glad to hear that's 184 00:09:10,800 --> 00:09:13,080 Speaker 1: going well, yeah, so don't worry. I won't talk that 185 00:09:13,120 --> 00:09:14,599 Speaker 1: long about each one or else. This will be the 186 00:09:14,720 --> 00:09:19,480 Speaker 1: first four hour, four hour best of both worlds. And 187 00:09:19,520 --> 00:09:21,319 Speaker 1: now you don't have a community either, so who knows 188 00:09:21,360 --> 00:09:23,000 Speaker 1: how you're going to listen to it? All right? So 189 00:09:23,080 --> 00:09:26,199 Speaker 1: was that number one for you? Number one? Okay, meetings 190 00:09:26,240 --> 00:09:28,920 Speaker 1: are better. Number two is that my reading life has 191 00:09:28,960 --> 00:09:31,240 Speaker 1: been really good this year, in fact, maybe even better 192 00:09:31,240 --> 00:09:33,520 Speaker 1: than last year. I feel like it took me a 193 00:09:33,559 --> 00:09:35,360 Speaker 1: little while to get my groove, like when everything was 194 00:09:35,360 --> 00:09:38,000 Speaker 1: initially hitting and I was just reading CNN and that 195 00:09:38,080 --> 00:09:40,080 Speaker 1: wasn't good. But now I'm like in the rhythm with 196 00:09:40,120 --> 00:09:42,640 Speaker 1: my books. I'm doing library pickups, and I've just read 197 00:09:42,640 --> 00:09:46,000 Speaker 1: a lot of good books this past couple months. Number 198 00:09:46,040 --> 00:09:50,000 Speaker 1: three zoom calls with college friends, which we never did before, 199 00:09:50,200 --> 00:09:52,120 Speaker 1: and like, why weren't we doing this before? I don't know. 200 00:09:52,120 --> 00:09:53,680 Speaker 1: I mean a lot of people had like text chains, 201 00:09:53,679 --> 00:09:55,200 Speaker 1: and we had a text chain that would be active 202 00:09:55,240 --> 00:09:57,160 Speaker 1: every once in a while. But the zoom calls have 203 00:09:57,240 --> 00:09:59,880 Speaker 1: been so much fun and there's always stuff to talk about, 204 00:10:00,160 --> 00:10:02,760 Speaker 1: and we're no longer talking about pandemic related stuff. It's 205 00:10:02,800 --> 00:10:04,480 Speaker 1: just like, hey, this is fun. And now we have 206 00:10:04,520 --> 00:10:06,439 Speaker 1: a standing call and it's every two weeks, which I 207 00:10:06,440 --> 00:10:08,760 Speaker 1: think is perfect because I think every week would be 208 00:10:08,880 --> 00:10:11,120 Speaker 1: like a lot, but every two weeks, I feel like 209 00:10:11,120 --> 00:10:12,959 Speaker 1: we always have new stuff to share. So that's been 210 00:10:13,160 --> 00:10:16,680 Speaker 1: really really fun. I feel like the pandemic has helped 211 00:10:16,760 --> 00:10:19,560 Speaker 1: me and a lot of others pay a lot of 212 00:10:19,559 --> 00:10:21,760 Speaker 1: attention to habits and what is working and what's not. 213 00:10:22,320 --> 00:10:25,040 Speaker 1: It's kind of that clean slate disruption that Gretchen Rubin 214 00:10:25,080 --> 00:10:28,400 Speaker 1: talks about. And also maybe just a lot of time 215 00:10:28,559 --> 00:10:31,040 Speaker 1: to be more self focused when you're not doing commutes, 216 00:10:31,120 --> 00:10:33,920 Speaker 1: or maybe your telehealth visits are more efficient than your 217 00:10:34,040 --> 00:10:36,360 Speaker 1: regular visit. I do feel like work is getting busier, 218 00:10:36,400 --> 00:10:39,040 Speaker 1: but now I feel like I've built some good pandemic 219 00:10:39,080 --> 00:10:42,400 Speaker 1: habits and that's been a positive. One of them is 220 00:10:42,440 --> 00:10:44,960 Speaker 1: my number five, which is my workouts. I feel really 221 00:10:44,960 --> 00:10:48,079 Speaker 1: happy right now. I've finished that eighty day Obsession program yay, 222 00:10:48,480 --> 00:10:51,800 Speaker 1: and now I'm doing Lift four, which is four weights workouts, 223 00:10:51,840 --> 00:10:53,800 Speaker 1: and then I've been running two times a week, so 224 00:10:53,840 --> 00:10:56,480 Speaker 1: I've liked that hybrid. I think ideally i'd like to 225 00:10:56,559 --> 00:10:58,280 Speaker 1: run three times, but I'm not sure I'm willing to 226 00:10:58,320 --> 00:11:00,760 Speaker 1: give up one of the lift workouts, so I don't know. 227 00:11:00,880 --> 00:11:02,800 Speaker 1: I'm not willing to work out every day, and I'm 228 00:11:02,800 --> 00:11:04,480 Speaker 1: not sure i want to do a double, so there 229 00:11:04,520 --> 00:11:06,600 Speaker 1: may not be a solution. But I really like the 230 00:11:06,640 --> 00:11:09,800 Speaker 1: program number six as I'm really happy with Cameron's new 231 00:11:09,800 --> 00:11:13,200 Speaker 1: school for him, just he seems to need a little 232 00:11:13,200 --> 00:11:17,000 Speaker 1: more extra attention. We may have made that jump anyway, 233 00:11:17,200 --> 00:11:18,960 Speaker 1: but I'm not sure because the thing that made us 234 00:11:19,000 --> 00:11:20,920 Speaker 1: just finally make that call was when they announced that 235 00:11:21,280 --> 00:11:23,960 Speaker 1: Broward was going to be online, So I'm really happy 236 00:11:24,040 --> 00:11:27,080 Speaker 1: about that. So far, I don't know. I've lost count 237 00:11:27,120 --> 00:11:30,800 Speaker 1: seven evenings. Okay, I don't know if this is a 238 00:11:30,840 --> 00:11:33,760 Speaker 1: point of pleasure or happiness because I feel like they're 239 00:11:33,800 --> 00:11:35,520 Speaker 1: work in progress, but I feel like I'm in a 240 00:11:35,559 --> 00:11:38,800 Speaker 1: good mindset to be working on our evenings. This has 241 00:11:38,840 --> 00:11:40,400 Speaker 1: kind of been a pain point for a while, but 242 00:11:40,440 --> 00:11:42,160 Speaker 1: I've had some good ones in the last couple of weeks. 243 00:11:42,600 --> 00:11:44,760 Speaker 1: I feel like I've started to figure out which ingredients 244 00:11:44,800 --> 00:11:47,720 Speaker 1: really make them better and make them worse. Being on 245 00:11:47,760 --> 00:11:50,880 Speaker 1: the phone makes them worse. Unfortunately, when I'm distracted, it 246 00:11:50,960 --> 00:11:52,840 Speaker 1: is a recipe for my kids to go crazy, and 247 00:11:53,400 --> 00:11:56,080 Speaker 1: it's kind of part of the fact that I'm really 248 00:11:56,120 --> 00:11:59,280 Speaker 1: working on that anyway. So yeah, evenings have been kind 249 00:11:59,280 --> 00:12:04,200 Speaker 1: of an improved bright Spot wardrobe. You're gonna get into 250 00:12:04,200 --> 00:12:08,200 Speaker 1: this too, so I basically wear the same thing every day, 251 00:12:08,240 --> 00:12:11,320 Speaker 1: even though I kind of felt like that was bad before, 252 00:12:11,360 --> 00:12:13,400 Speaker 1: but now I feel like what I wear every day 253 00:12:13,480 --> 00:12:15,960 Speaker 1: I'm more happy with. So even though I may not 254 00:12:16,040 --> 00:12:18,040 Speaker 1: be wearing a lot of the clothing that Lannie helped 255 00:12:18,040 --> 00:12:20,920 Speaker 1: me buy because I'm just not ready yet, and also 256 00:12:20,960 --> 00:12:22,839 Speaker 1: because I now have this habit of like taking walks 257 00:12:22,880 --> 00:12:24,679 Speaker 1: during my work day and I don't want to get 258 00:12:24,720 --> 00:12:26,200 Speaker 1: it's like still really really hot, so I have to 259 00:12:26,200 --> 00:12:28,840 Speaker 1: wear things that will allow me to breatheable, clothing that 260 00:12:28,920 --> 00:12:31,040 Speaker 1: I feel comfortable doing that in. But I swear I 261 00:12:31,120 --> 00:12:33,080 Speaker 1: wear the same top which Laura will talk about and 262 00:12:33,120 --> 00:12:35,880 Speaker 1: we've mentioned before, and black pants and my necklace and 263 00:12:36,120 --> 00:12:38,000 Speaker 1: like I bring my Moto jackets. We're on top like 264 00:12:38,040 --> 00:12:40,120 Speaker 1: every single day. Like I'm turning into female Steve Jobs 265 00:12:40,120 --> 00:12:44,040 Speaker 1: and I don't really care. I like it. Two more 266 00:12:44,240 --> 00:12:47,800 Speaker 1: technology has been mostly working again. This is kind of 267 00:12:47,840 --> 00:12:49,400 Speaker 1: parallels to the meetings, but I feel like I'm getting 268 00:12:49,400 --> 00:12:51,440 Speaker 1: better at it. Like touching that mute button is now 269 00:12:51,440 --> 00:12:54,560 Speaker 1: like a complete reflex for me. It always kind of 270 00:12:54,679 --> 00:12:57,360 Speaker 1: shocks me when it's not for others yet, but I 271 00:12:57,360 --> 00:13:00,600 Speaker 1: think people are getting there, and even weather, which is 272 00:13:01,120 --> 00:13:04,000 Speaker 1: not as user friendly as Zoom, I feel like I'm 273 00:13:04,000 --> 00:13:05,760 Speaker 1: finally getting a handle on, Like I can share my 274 00:13:05,800 --> 00:13:07,960 Speaker 1: slides and start a whiteboard and do a breakout room 275 00:13:08,000 --> 00:13:09,439 Speaker 1: and blah, blah blah, whereas I didn't know how to 276 00:13:09,480 --> 00:13:12,760 Speaker 1: do it before. And then my last one is I 277 00:13:12,760 --> 00:13:14,679 Speaker 1: feel like, you know, this year has done good things 278 00:13:14,720 --> 00:13:16,560 Speaker 1: for our budget. I know. That's like I feel very 279 00:13:16,559 --> 00:13:18,680 Speaker 1: guilty saying that in a way, because many people have 280 00:13:18,800 --> 00:13:21,440 Speaker 1: had to struggle this year, but for us, we have 281 00:13:21,720 --> 00:13:24,719 Speaker 1: been lucky enough to enjoy SETI incomes. I mean, we've 282 00:13:24,760 --> 00:13:28,679 Speaker 1: been working throughout, so it's not like we were on 283 00:13:28,760 --> 00:13:31,840 Speaker 1: vacation or anything like that. But I don't know, I 284 00:13:31,840 --> 00:13:33,680 Speaker 1: feel like I finally have a real good handle on 285 00:13:33,720 --> 00:13:36,800 Speaker 1: our inflows and outflows, and especially what our taxes should be, 286 00:13:37,000 --> 00:13:38,960 Speaker 1: especially now that we're not homeowners, and that's a little 287 00:13:39,000 --> 00:13:41,840 Speaker 1: bit different. We learned our lesson by having to pay 288 00:13:41,840 --> 00:13:44,400 Speaker 1: like a lot of overflow taxes for twenty nineteen, and 289 00:13:44,480 --> 00:13:46,360 Speaker 1: then before the end of twenty twenty we wanted to 290 00:13:46,600 --> 00:13:48,959 Speaker 1: our accountant had us like prepay so that we had 291 00:13:49,000 --> 00:13:50,800 Speaker 1: no danger of doing that again, because apparently if you 292 00:13:50,840 --> 00:13:52,640 Speaker 1: do that twice you get like a large penalty. We 293 00:13:52,640 --> 00:13:56,160 Speaker 1: didn't want that. So I feel like we're finally kind 294 00:13:56,200 --> 00:13:58,000 Speaker 1: of out of the unpredictable part. We kind of know 295 00:13:58,040 --> 00:14:00,839 Speaker 1: what we need to withhold for next year and I 296 00:14:00,880 --> 00:14:03,400 Speaker 1: feel good about it. So yeah, there we go. The 297 00:14:04,240 --> 00:14:09,679 Speaker 1: estimated taxes world is a fun, fun place to be. 298 00:14:09,720 --> 00:14:12,000 Speaker 1: This is not just you know, meeting the quarterly payments 299 00:14:12,000 --> 00:14:13,839 Speaker 1: that you also have to pay like one hundred and 300 00:14:13,920 --> 00:14:16,280 Speaker 1: ten percent of what you owed for the previous year 301 00:14:16,280 --> 00:14:18,600 Speaker 1: because the assumption is that your income will go up 302 00:14:19,520 --> 00:14:23,040 Speaker 1: and so that way you are not underpaying. But yeah, 303 00:14:23,160 --> 00:14:25,480 Speaker 1: it's it's fun when people are first in that world 304 00:14:25,560 --> 00:14:28,640 Speaker 1: and figuring it out and they're like, wait, I have 305 00:14:28,720 --> 00:14:30,680 Speaker 1: to pay all this money in April and June, in 306 00:14:30,720 --> 00:14:33,120 Speaker 1: September and janu Well, it was like a double whimmy 307 00:14:33,120 --> 00:14:35,640 Speaker 1: because it was like, oh, you owe for twenty nineteen, 308 00:14:36,040 --> 00:14:37,600 Speaker 1: and oh my god, we don't want to make the 309 00:14:37,600 --> 00:14:39,760 Speaker 1: same mistake in twenty twenty. So we sent like two 310 00:14:39,880 --> 00:14:44,040 Speaker 1: large irs withdrawals. Oh those are fun. Yeah, but now 311 00:14:44,040 --> 00:14:45,840 Speaker 1: they're done, and I feel like for twenty twenty one, 312 00:14:45,880 --> 00:14:47,560 Speaker 1: I'm like armed with the knowledge and I'm like, we're 313 00:14:47,560 --> 00:14:49,440 Speaker 1: just gonna like basically our paychecks are gonna be like 314 00:14:49,480 --> 00:14:51,560 Speaker 1: a dollar every month, and like it's going to with 315 00:14:51,680 --> 00:14:54,880 Speaker 1: hold everything. We'll be good. You'll be good. All right. Well, 316 00:14:54,920 --> 00:15:09,520 Speaker 1: on that note, let's let's take a short break well, 317 00:15:09,520 --> 00:15:13,240 Speaker 1: we are back talking about various our lists of good things. 318 00:15:13,640 --> 00:15:18,200 Speaker 1: Sarah's been discussing her technology, wardrobe, and budget fun that 319 00:15:18,280 --> 00:15:21,560 Speaker 1: she is experiencing over the last few months. I feel 320 00:15:21,600 --> 00:15:24,560 Speaker 1: a little bit sort of inauthentic right now because I 321 00:15:24,600 --> 00:15:26,600 Speaker 1: have a couple of big fun things going on in 322 00:15:26,600 --> 00:15:29,080 Speaker 1: my life that I can't talk about yet, but we'll 323 00:15:29,080 --> 00:15:32,240 Speaker 1: share those soon. I hope that everything not any more babies, 324 00:15:32,240 --> 00:15:36,680 Speaker 1: in case anyone's wondering, like, that's not it, but so 325 00:15:36,840 --> 00:15:39,280 Speaker 1: some other cool stuff that I hope to share soon. 326 00:15:40,080 --> 00:15:42,440 Speaker 1: Let's see one one cool thing. I took a weekend 327 00:15:42,480 --> 00:15:46,200 Speaker 1: trip with my big kids. This was, you know, my 328 00:15:46,280 --> 00:15:50,280 Speaker 1: first time away from Henry, which was a little strange 329 00:15:51,000 --> 00:15:53,480 Speaker 1: because I hadn't been gone from him at all in 330 00:15:53,760 --> 00:15:57,640 Speaker 1: these first nine months of his life. But he survived, 331 00:15:57,640 --> 00:16:00,480 Speaker 1: and I survived, and he and Michael had a great 332 00:16:00,520 --> 00:16:03,880 Speaker 1: time to gather. I think he probably slept better because 333 00:16:03,920 --> 00:16:05,920 Speaker 1: Michael would give him like ten ounces in the bottle 334 00:16:06,000 --> 00:16:08,800 Speaker 1: right before bed, whereas it's hard to produce that sort 335 00:16:08,840 --> 00:16:11,680 Speaker 1: of on your own. You can pump it earlier in 336 00:16:11,680 --> 00:16:13,400 Speaker 1: the day, but it's hard to do it right before bed. 337 00:16:14,040 --> 00:16:17,320 Speaker 1: So possibly there was more sleep going on which on 338 00:16:17,360 --> 00:16:19,160 Speaker 1: some level was tough thing because I was in a 339 00:16:19,240 --> 00:16:21,960 Speaker 1: hotel room with three children, Like I wasn't getting the 340 00:16:21,960 --> 00:16:24,920 Speaker 1: full I thought. I was like, oh, I'll seek great 341 00:16:24,920 --> 00:16:26,600 Speaker 1: without the baby, but you know then I have other 342 00:16:26,680 --> 00:16:28,680 Speaker 1: kids kicking and storing. So anyway, but we had fun, 343 00:16:29,080 --> 00:16:31,920 Speaker 1: so great speak of that spending time with the older kids. 344 00:16:31,960 --> 00:16:33,640 Speaker 1: Another thing that's really been fun is I'm going on 345 00:16:33,680 --> 00:16:37,720 Speaker 1: walks with my daughter. So she's had some breaks during 346 00:16:37,720 --> 00:16:39,680 Speaker 1: her school day that have corresponded with when I might 347 00:16:39,720 --> 00:16:41,720 Speaker 1: want to take a break, and she's also expressed interest 348 00:16:41,800 --> 00:16:43,480 Speaker 1: and then doing something with me. I think my boys 349 00:16:43,520 --> 00:16:47,120 Speaker 1: would rather play video games during their downtime that she 350 00:16:47,320 --> 00:16:49,000 Speaker 1: wants to go for walks. We've been doing that and 351 00:16:49,080 --> 00:16:52,280 Speaker 1: it's good to have a walking companion. Another really cool 352 00:16:52,320 --> 00:16:55,160 Speaker 1: thing we got Ruth this watch. It was actually Sam's 353 00:16:56,080 --> 00:16:58,920 Speaker 1: before but as the kids turn eleven, they get a phone, 354 00:16:58,920 --> 00:17:00,480 Speaker 1: and before that they have a watch that they can 355 00:17:00,520 --> 00:17:03,840 Speaker 1: call us on and text us. But she's got her 356 00:17:03,840 --> 00:17:06,359 Speaker 1: grandmother's numbers in the phone, and so she just calls 357 00:17:06,400 --> 00:17:10,360 Speaker 1: them and it's like she's very very good at keeping touch. 358 00:17:10,359 --> 00:17:13,439 Speaker 1: I would say, much better than maybe other members of 359 00:17:13,480 --> 00:17:15,880 Speaker 1: the family are at keeping in touch and so it's 360 00:17:15,880 --> 00:17:19,520 Speaker 1: been good that she's been doing that. Sun Basket is 361 00:17:19,560 --> 00:17:21,760 Speaker 1: another fun thing that's going on right now, so that 362 00:17:21,800 --> 00:17:24,480 Speaker 1: they were an advertiser earlier a couple months ago. It's 363 00:17:24,520 --> 00:17:27,320 Speaker 1: one of the meal kit things I've we decided to 364 00:17:27,320 --> 00:17:31,159 Speaker 1: become paying customers. And it's just been fun because they 365 00:17:31,280 --> 00:17:34,800 Speaker 1: it's different stuff than I would cook, like more ethnic 366 00:17:34,920 --> 00:17:37,280 Speaker 1: stuff that is not you know, ethnicity is that I'm 367 00:17:37,280 --> 00:17:41,720 Speaker 1: necessarily familiar with the cuisine, you know, Burmese something or 368 00:17:42,000 --> 00:17:46,800 Speaker 1: you know, Polynesian dish or Korean food. So I've enjoyed 369 00:17:46,840 --> 00:17:50,440 Speaker 1: getting to know those flavor profiles and you know, probably 370 00:17:50,480 --> 00:17:52,520 Speaker 1: a bit more spiced in stuff that I than I 371 00:17:52,520 --> 00:17:54,879 Speaker 1: would cook on my own. And so yeah, it's just 372 00:17:54,880 --> 00:17:57,320 Speaker 1: been kind of fun to have those meal kits as 373 00:17:57,440 --> 00:18:05,119 Speaker 1: a bit of variety. The changing leaves October it's just gorgeous. 374 00:18:04,920 --> 00:18:07,199 Speaker 1: It's the best time to be here. I've said that 375 00:18:07,240 --> 00:18:09,760 Speaker 1: in like six episodes in a row now, But I 376 00:18:09,800 --> 00:18:12,679 Speaker 1: love fall. Fall is wonderful. Sorry for those of you 377 00:18:12,720 --> 00:18:16,080 Speaker 1: in Florida who are not experiencing it. Another good thing 378 00:18:16,200 --> 00:18:20,440 Speaker 1: is my uniclothed drape t shirts. So Sarah at one 379 00:18:20,480 --> 00:18:24,000 Speaker 1: point and this podcast and on her blog mentioned these 380 00:18:24,160 --> 00:18:30,760 Speaker 1: amazing T shirts that Lonnie our stylist had found and 381 00:18:31,240 --> 00:18:34,040 Speaker 1: Uniclo had them either on sale or maybe they're always 382 00:18:34,040 --> 00:18:35,520 Speaker 1: ten dollars. I don't know, but I found them for 383 00:18:35,640 --> 00:18:38,720 Speaker 1: ten dollars, so I ordered four of them and they're great, 384 00:18:38,920 --> 00:18:41,920 Speaker 1: Like there's something about the drape. So it's the uniclothed 385 00:18:42,000 --> 00:18:46,520 Speaker 1: drape T shirt, and it just looks slightly nicer than 386 00:18:46,560 --> 00:18:49,080 Speaker 1: your average T shirt and has a good sleevelength, the 387 00:18:49,240 --> 00:18:53,040 Speaker 1: neck and drape, and so I would highly recommend checking 388 00:18:53,119 --> 00:18:57,400 Speaker 1: that out. I've been wearing them a lot. Rothy's Shoes 389 00:18:57,560 --> 00:19:00,320 Speaker 1: is another they advertised on my other podcast, and I 390 00:19:00,359 --> 00:19:02,480 Speaker 1: actually really like them. They're comfortable. I have a pair 391 00:19:02,520 --> 00:19:06,359 Speaker 1: of sort of grayish bone colored slip ons that you 392 00:19:06,760 --> 00:19:09,200 Speaker 1: just wear through fall. I've realized I don't really want 393 00:19:09,200 --> 00:19:11,520 Speaker 1: to wear boots and socks until I absolutely have to, 394 00:19:12,119 --> 00:19:15,520 Speaker 1: so I'll keep wearying these, probably three to November at least. 395 00:19:16,240 --> 00:19:19,720 Speaker 1: Another good thing is virtual speaking engagements. This has taken 396 00:19:19,800 --> 00:19:22,359 Speaker 1: forever for this part of the business to start going, 397 00:19:22,400 --> 00:19:25,200 Speaker 1: but we are finally getting people who are actually confirming dates, 398 00:19:25,280 --> 00:19:29,000 Speaker 1: confirming events. I think it just took people getting their 399 00:19:29,000 --> 00:19:31,399 Speaker 1: heads around that there aren't going to be conferences for 400 00:19:31,880 --> 00:19:34,240 Speaker 1: a year, two years, who knows. So if you want 401 00:19:34,280 --> 00:19:36,040 Speaker 1: to do something, you're going to have to figure out 402 00:19:36,119 --> 00:19:40,520 Speaker 1: virtual programming. And so you know, it's not where the 403 00:19:40,760 --> 00:19:43,760 Speaker 1: in person speaking business was. But if in person speaking 404 00:19:43,800 --> 00:19:46,600 Speaker 1: is not an option for people, then we have to 405 00:19:46,600 --> 00:19:49,280 Speaker 1: come up with something else. And so that's finally been 406 00:19:49,440 --> 00:19:54,840 Speaker 1: going Vandercam Media LLC. Speaking of business related pivots, I 407 00:19:54,880 --> 00:19:57,879 Speaker 1: finally incorporated myself and opened a business to checking account 408 00:19:57,880 --> 00:20:03,440 Speaker 1: and other big girl business related tasks. You know, wasn't 409 00:20:03,480 --> 00:20:06,040 Speaker 1: that hard use legal zoom, so go for it if 410 00:20:06,040 --> 00:20:08,720 Speaker 1: anyone wants to become an actual business, which might be 411 00:20:08,760 --> 00:20:12,159 Speaker 1: a smart idea given some recent legislation in various states 412 00:20:12,160 --> 00:20:15,120 Speaker 1: and possibly coming into the federal but we weren't talking 413 00:20:15,119 --> 00:20:18,320 Speaker 1: about that. And then my last thing, my tenth grade thing, 414 00:20:18,400 --> 00:20:24,720 Speaker 1: is that my teeth don't hurt anymore. So longtime listeners know, 415 00:20:24,840 --> 00:20:29,560 Speaker 1: I went through a long sequence of you know, dental 416 00:20:29,600 --> 00:20:32,040 Speaker 1: related things. Although I think our Dentist is airing after this, 417 00:20:32,760 --> 00:20:35,800 Speaker 1: but the episode we have interviewing a dentist is airing 418 00:20:35,800 --> 00:20:38,399 Speaker 1: after this one airs. But I had a root canal 419 00:20:38,480 --> 00:20:40,280 Speaker 1: and then a follow up root canal because they didn't 420 00:20:40,280 --> 00:20:43,280 Speaker 1: get everything on the first root canal. But it is 421 00:20:43,359 --> 00:20:46,760 Speaker 1: all all good now, life is good. My teeth don't hurt. 422 00:20:47,160 --> 00:20:50,520 Speaker 1: It's really you know. Yeah, when your teethhurt, it's hard 423 00:20:50,520 --> 00:20:52,800 Speaker 1: to focus on anything else. Will I will tell you this. 424 00:20:52,880 --> 00:20:56,600 Speaker 1: It's a special and unique kind of pain. I have 425 00:20:56,760 --> 00:21:00,800 Speaker 1: not ever experienced it, and I am scared. Well, I 426 00:21:00,800 --> 00:21:02,560 Speaker 1: can tell you now they can deal stuff and do something, 427 00:21:02,600 --> 00:21:05,280 Speaker 1: you know, if you can get into the endodontist. And 428 00:21:05,520 --> 00:21:08,240 Speaker 1: it's not a pleasant procedure, and going through it twice 429 00:21:08,320 --> 00:21:11,080 Speaker 1: isn't pleasant either, But at least it's mostly done. I 430 00:21:11,080 --> 00:21:12,720 Speaker 1: have a temporary filling right now that I need to 431 00:21:12,720 --> 00:21:16,520 Speaker 1: get the permanent filling in, but hopefully that'll be relatively minor, 432 00:21:16,640 --> 00:21:19,840 Speaker 1: I hope anyway. All right, so should we do our 433 00:21:19,880 --> 00:21:21,040 Speaker 1: Q and I first or our love of the week? 434 00:21:21,040 --> 00:21:22,480 Speaker 1: I guess these are sort of all. Love of the 435 00:21:22,480 --> 00:21:26,440 Speaker 1: weeks are ten love of the weeks each? Yeah that's true. Yeah, 436 00:21:26,440 --> 00:21:27,840 Speaker 1: actually I missed my love of the week in there. 437 00:21:27,880 --> 00:21:29,440 Speaker 1: I was waiting for your why don't you do years? 438 00:21:29,440 --> 00:21:32,640 Speaker 1: It's very cute. Oh well, so Henry is eating finger food. 439 00:21:32,680 --> 00:21:34,400 Speaker 1: I don't know how many people have heard about sort 440 00:21:34,440 --> 00:21:37,600 Speaker 1: of baby lad weening. It's just more focused on the 441 00:21:37,680 --> 00:21:43,800 Speaker 1: kids feeding themselves versus spoon feeding them mush and he 442 00:21:43,840 --> 00:21:46,800 Speaker 1: would be transitioning into finger food now anyway, but it's 443 00:21:46,920 --> 00:21:49,840 Speaker 1: just he seems to enjoy it more to have control 444 00:21:49,880 --> 00:21:52,159 Speaker 1: of his own food. And so we put little bits 445 00:21:52,200 --> 00:21:58,359 Speaker 1: of anything, you know, pork, tomato, avocado, whatever, on his plate, 446 00:21:58,400 --> 00:22:00,600 Speaker 1: and he kind of MUSHes it on his face and 447 00:22:00,680 --> 00:22:02,639 Speaker 1: some gets in his mouth because he still seems to 448 00:22:02,680 --> 00:22:06,960 Speaker 1: be growing. So hopefully this will keep foods as a 449 00:22:07,040 --> 00:22:11,399 Speaker 1: normal sort of experience. So I'm still hoping we'll avoid 450 00:22:11,440 --> 00:22:14,560 Speaker 1: some of these selective eating issues that have plagued others 451 00:22:14,600 --> 00:22:17,359 Speaker 1: of my children. I'm not counting on it because kids 452 00:22:17,400 --> 00:22:20,359 Speaker 1: are what they are, but you know, we'll see. I 453 00:22:20,840 --> 00:22:22,800 Speaker 1: it's funny that you mention it's like easier, because I 454 00:22:22,840 --> 00:22:24,440 Speaker 1: was always like, oh, I kind of want to try 455 00:22:24,480 --> 00:22:26,600 Speaker 1: baby LIDLEENI with that, I'll just be so messy, and 456 00:22:26,640 --> 00:22:29,800 Speaker 1: the spoon is easier. Well, I mean I think you 457 00:22:29,880 --> 00:22:31,800 Speaker 1: got a mess either way. Like, let's let's put it 458 00:22:31,800 --> 00:22:34,879 Speaker 1: this way. You're feeding a nine to twelve month old baby, 459 00:22:34,920 --> 00:22:36,760 Speaker 1: Like there's mess all over the place. Like, let's just 460 00:22:36,960 --> 00:22:41,560 Speaker 1: acknowledge that my kids, like they were such eater, I 461 00:22:41,560 --> 00:22:43,040 Speaker 1: don't think there was a mess. They like open up 462 00:22:43,040 --> 00:22:46,159 Speaker 1: they really they were on the spoon. They were throwing 463 00:22:46,160 --> 00:22:49,400 Speaker 1: it out at you, so yeah, and spit it everywhere. Yeah, 464 00:22:49,440 --> 00:22:51,240 Speaker 1: every once in a while that did happen. That's true. 465 00:22:51,280 --> 00:22:53,040 Speaker 1: That's true. But some of them were just like machines, 466 00:22:53,040 --> 00:22:54,679 Speaker 1: like and they would eat it all in like thirty seconds. 467 00:22:54,680 --> 00:22:56,320 Speaker 1: I'm like, well that was but yeah, of course the 468 00:22:56,359 --> 00:22:58,840 Speaker 1: mess comes later anyway, because eventually you have to give 469 00:22:58,880 --> 00:23:03,440 Speaker 1: them food. That's just whether you want to delay the mess. Yeah, 470 00:23:03,520 --> 00:23:05,480 Speaker 1: you know, you sweep up the floor and wipe down 471 00:23:05,480 --> 00:23:09,000 Speaker 1: the high chair, and you know, put in the bath. 472 00:23:09,800 --> 00:23:13,800 Speaker 1: Sometimes the messiest space is like underneath my six year old. Now, 473 00:23:15,160 --> 00:23:17,159 Speaker 1: I will say that my children eat a lot of 474 00:23:17,200 --> 00:23:20,840 Speaker 1: parmesan cheese on pasta, and like those little flecks of parmesan, 475 00:23:20,880 --> 00:23:24,600 Speaker 1: they are everywhere. It's impossible to get all of them. 476 00:23:24,720 --> 00:23:34,479 Speaker 1: So there you go. It's always the rice, the rice shoulders. 477 00:23:35,800 --> 00:23:37,320 Speaker 1: And a stute reader did say, you know, if you 478 00:23:37,400 --> 00:23:40,320 Speaker 1: leave that rice, it does dry and get easier to sweep, 479 00:23:40,520 --> 00:23:42,879 Speaker 1: and I responded that, like, that's like such a risk 480 00:23:42,920 --> 00:23:51,400 Speaker 1: where we live pants little cockroaches. Big floor that cockroach? 481 00:23:52,840 --> 00:23:55,640 Speaker 1: Oh yeah, we have We have plenty of cockroaches. Who 482 00:23:55,640 --> 00:23:59,240 Speaker 1: wants to come visit? Kidding? Okay, My love of the 483 00:23:59,240 --> 00:24:02,960 Speaker 1: week is I as one does when one has a 484 00:24:02,960 --> 00:24:04,920 Speaker 1: planner podcast and feels like I need to just try 485 00:24:04,960 --> 00:24:08,560 Speaker 1: every product. I did purchase a Q four planner and 486 00:24:08,600 --> 00:24:11,320 Speaker 1: it's called the Amplify, And initially I was like, eh, 487 00:24:11,400 --> 00:24:13,480 Speaker 1: this there's a lot of planner for one quarter, but 488 00:24:13,520 --> 00:24:15,560 Speaker 1: I actually kind of enjoy it. I don't think it 489 00:24:15,560 --> 00:24:17,400 Speaker 1: will be my like forever planner, but I think it'll 490 00:24:17,440 --> 00:24:20,520 Speaker 1: be a nice fun thing to do for the quarter. 491 00:24:20,680 --> 00:24:22,879 Speaker 1: So if you're looking for like and altern it to 492 00:24:22,920 --> 00:24:24,560 Speaker 1: the full Focus that still gives you a lot of 493 00:24:24,600 --> 00:24:26,600 Speaker 1: page for each day, but without a lot without as 494 00:24:26,720 --> 00:24:31,880 Speaker 1: much specific goal setting prompting, you might like the Amplify. 495 00:24:32,119 --> 00:24:34,560 Speaker 1: All right, we will check that out. All right, Well, 496 00:24:34,640 --> 00:24:40,520 Speaker 1: let's get to our question. Do you want to consolidate 497 00:24:40,840 --> 00:24:46,359 Speaker 1: this one? Oh? Yeah, it's two parts, but also you know, okay, 498 00:24:46,480 --> 00:24:49,520 Speaker 1: part one, I'm going to consolidate. I'll read it, I'll 499 00:24:49,520 --> 00:24:52,680 Speaker 1: short it. Okay. I have a nanny who is a lingerer, 500 00:24:52,840 --> 00:24:54,680 Speaker 1: so when I get home from work, she will often 501 00:24:54,960 --> 00:24:56,520 Speaker 1: kind of want to stay and talk to me for 502 00:24:56,680 --> 00:24:58,920 Speaker 1: up to thirty minutes of conversation while I just want 503 00:24:58,920 --> 00:25:00,480 Speaker 1: to go up to the room and bond with my 504 00:25:00,520 --> 00:25:03,000 Speaker 1: baby and be by myself. I can't tell if she 505 00:25:03,400 --> 00:25:06,359 Speaker 1: understands when the day is over and I do the 506 00:25:06,400 --> 00:25:08,280 Speaker 1: whole thanks and walk her to the door and say, well, 507 00:25:08,320 --> 00:25:09,760 Speaker 1: I need to go feed the baby, but she's not 508 00:25:09,800 --> 00:25:12,320 Speaker 1: getting the hint. Question is it okay to consider her 509 00:25:12,400 --> 00:25:14,080 Speaker 1: off the clock when I have walked her to the 510 00:25:14,119 --> 00:25:17,040 Speaker 1: door and she has a clear opportunity to leave, And 511 00:25:17,080 --> 00:25:19,400 Speaker 1: also any tips on kind of getting her to get 512 00:25:19,400 --> 00:25:22,119 Speaker 1: the message. And then the second part of the question 513 00:25:22,440 --> 00:25:25,439 Speaker 1: was she said she has a contract for her nanny, 514 00:25:25,680 --> 00:25:27,520 Speaker 1: which can be a great thing to do, which includes 515 00:25:27,560 --> 00:25:31,439 Speaker 1: household tasks she'd like done, but she doesn't feel like 516 00:25:31,800 --> 00:25:34,120 Speaker 1: she's able to do them all. One of the things 517 00:25:34,119 --> 00:25:36,159 Speaker 1: she wanted was the kid's laundry to be done, and 518 00:25:36,200 --> 00:25:38,720 Speaker 1: it's not being completed. She has a four month old 519 00:25:38,760 --> 00:25:40,479 Speaker 1: and a four year old, and she said, I think 520 00:25:40,520 --> 00:25:42,560 Speaker 1: she feels obligated to play with and entertain the four 521 00:25:42,680 --> 00:25:45,320 Speaker 1: year old all day. My question is, do you guys 522 00:25:45,359 --> 00:25:47,840 Speaker 1: have an opinion on what's reasonable from a time perspective, 523 00:25:47,880 --> 00:25:50,920 Speaker 1: she's working seven thirty to two, the baby naps about 524 00:25:50,960 --> 00:25:53,280 Speaker 1: two hours, and she also does about four pages of 525 00:25:53,280 --> 00:25:55,520 Speaker 1: a homeschool workbook with my four year old. Every day. 526 00:25:55,800 --> 00:25:58,280 Speaker 1: She has popping meals and doing dishes. Is it reasonable 527 00:25:58,280 --> 00:26:00,480 Speaker 1: to ask her to do laundry? Is that too much? 528 00:26:00,640 --> 00:26:03,119 Speaker 1: She said, she's really happy with her. Otherwise, do you 529 00:26:03,240 --> 00:26:05,320 Speaker 1: many to go first? Here? If why don't you go first? Okay, 530 00:26:05,480 --> 00:26:08,000 Speaker 1: So for the second part, I'll just my short answer is, 531 00:26:08,040 --> 00:26:10,840 Speaker 1: I think it does sound like a lot for that timeframe, 532 00:26:11,760 --> 00:26:15,040 Speaker 1: particularly because you know, the writer says she doesn't need 533 00:26:15,080 --> 00:26:17,400 Speaker 1: to play with and entertain my four year old all day, 534 00:26:17,400 --> 00:26:19,479 Speaker 1: But like, if the kid's kind of trying to do 535 00:26:19,520 --> 00:26:22,880 Speaker 1: school and she's doing homeschool with him, she's still watching them. 536 00:26:23,440 --> 00:26:26,040 Speaker 1: And if she's already doing cooking and then helping the 537 00:26:26,040 --> 00:26:27,840 Speaker 1: four year old with the worksheet and the baby only 538 00:26:27,920 --> 00:26:30,440 Speaker 1: naps for two hours, I think if she was working 539 00:26:30,440 --> 00:26:32,520 Speaker 1: a full day, like seven thirty to five thirty or 540 00:26:32,680 --> 00:26:36,080 Speaker 1: or seven thirty to four, maybe maybe you could argue 541 00:26:36,080 --> 00:26:38,840 Speaker 1: that she would have time to do additional household tasks 542 00:26:38,880 --> 00:26:41,280 Speaker 1: in addition to the meal prep and dishes. But I'm 543 00:26:41,280 --> 00:26:44,639 Speaker 1: not sure it is reasonable to ask for, you know, 544 00:26:44,760 --> 00:26:47,320 Speaker 1: laundry in addition to watching these two kids for not 545 00:26:47,440 --> 00:26:49,720 Speaker 1: even a full day. I don't know that I'd be 546 00:26:49,720 --> 00:26:54,879 Speaker 1: able to get all that time myself. So there you go. 547 00:26:55,160 --> 00:26:57,040 Speaker 1: That's my answer to that. And then the first one. 548 00:26:57,240 --> 00:27:00,919 Speaker 1: My suggestion was just to be really direct and say, like, 549 00:27:00,960 --> 00:27:03,000 Speaker 1: when I get home, I'm dying to have some bonding 550 00:27:03,000 --> 00:27:04,880 Speaker 1: time with a baby. So you should definitely feel free 551 00:27:04,920 --> 00:27:07,199 Speaker 1: to go spend time with your family. And if that 552 00:27:07,400 --> 00:27:10,000 Speaker 1: is not understood, then just make sure you're not paying 553 00:27:10,000 --> 00:27:11,639 Speaker 1: her for that time. And if she asks, you can 554 00:27:11,680 --> 00:27:14,119 Speaker 1: say I was very clear that like you were done, 555 00:27:14,720 --> 00:27:17,280 Speaker 1: and hopefully she'll get the message. So I don't know 556 00:27:17,320 --> 00:27:19,160 Speaker 1: what are your thoughts. Well, I thought there was maybe 557 00:27:19,320 --> 00:27:22,000 Speaker 1: something she could combine these two that, you know, I 558 00:27:22,000 --> 00:27:24,680 Speaker 1: think maybe the issues this is a really short work day, 559 00:27:25,119 --> 00:27:27,760 Speaker 1: and maybe this this nanny just doesn't have anything else 560 00:27:27,760 --> 00:27:30,600 Speaker 1: she's doing afterwards, and so on some levels like well, 561 00:27:30,600 --> 00:27:32,440 Speaker 1: you know, I'm some other person to talk to, like 562 00:27:32,600 --> 00:27:36,399 Speaker 1: hang out, you know, kind of fun after work. So 563 00:27:36,960 --> 00:27:39,000 Speaker 1: if there are extra tasks she wants her to do 564 00:27:39,119 --> 00:27:41,400 Speaker 1: and she doesn't have anything she's going to like, why 565 00:27:41,440 --> 00:27:44,080 Speaker 1: not just pay her for some extra hours, Like if 566 00:27:44,240 --> 00:27:46,679 Speaker 1: you know that is at all a possibility for this person, 567 00:27:47,160 --> 00:27:49,879 Speaker 1: she could have her stay till three thirty or something 568 00:27:49,880 --> 00:27:52,399 Speaker 1: and then get to those household tasks that aren't going 569 00:27:52,480 --> 00:27:55,640 Speaker 1: to happen between seven thirty and two. And especially since 570 00:27:55,680 --> 00:27:57,719 Speaker 1: the mom is home with the baby at that point, 571 00:27:58,119 --> 00:28:01,639 Speaker 1: she will have, you know, the capacity to do stuff 572 00:28:02,080 --> 00:28:03,800 Speaker 1: that she wouldn't have had when she was taking care 573 00:28:03,840 --> 00:28:06,280 Speaker 1: of the baby during during the hours. So I thought 574 00:28:06,280 --> 00:28:10,560 Speaker 1: that maybe these issues could be combined into one beautiful 575 00:28:10,680 --> 00:28:15,040 Speaker 1: solution to that. I love that. And they have a contract, 576 00:28:15,119 --> 00:28:16,879 Speaker 1: so it sounds like you could make that really clear, 577 00:28:17,000 --> 00:28:19,639 Speaker 1: like Okay, at two o'clock, I will come home and 578 00:28:19,640 --> 00:28:23,400 Speaker 1: take the baby, and you will work on xyz household things, 579 00:28:23,440 --> 00:28:25,080 Speaker 1: and maybe the nanny will be really happy to have 580 00:28:25,480 --> 00:28:27,280 Speaker 1: a place to be in some extra hours. That is 581 00:28:27,320 --> 00:28:29,560 Speaker 1: such a good Yeah. I think this is something a 582 00:28:29,600 --> 00:28:31,320 Speaker 1: lot of people have their trouble getting their head around, though, 583 00:28:31,359 --> 00:28:33,439 Speaker 1: is that you can pay for you know, childcare and 584 00:28:33,480 --> 00:28:36,600 Speaker 1: household help while you are in the house. And I 585 00:28:36,640 --> 00:28:38,720 Speaker 1: am used to that because I work from home and 586 00:28:38,800 --> 00:28:41,120 Speaker 1: have for many many years, but a lot of people, 587 00:28:41,160 --> 00:28:43,360 Speaker 1: I'm sure if you are in an office a traditional 588 00:28:43,400 --> 00:28:45,200 Speaker 1: office job. The thought is, well, we have childcare while 589 00:28:45,200 --> 00:28:47,080 Speaker 1: and gone, and so whoever gets home you know that 590 00:28:47,440 --> 00:28:50,720 Speaker 1: first that's when the childcare ends. But it doesn't have to, 591 00:28:51,120 --> 00:28:53,320 Speaker 1: I mean, you know, and it might in some cases 592 00:28:53,920 --> 00:28:56,800 Speaker 1: make life function better if there's an extra hour or two. 593 00:28:56,800 --> 00:28:59,120 Speaker 1: And especially since this you know, we're not talking like 594 00:28:59,160 --> 00:29:01,480 Speaker 1: having the person stay eleven hours instead of ten, like 595 00:29:01,920 --> 00:29:05,440 Speaker 1: you know, she's there for like five hours. That's a 596 00:29:05,560 --> 00:29:08,320 Speaker 1: very different matter. And so if she doesn't have anything 597 00:29:08,320 --> 00:29:10,600 Speaker 1: else going on, is interested in earning some extra money 598 00:29:10,640 --> 00:29:13,800 Speaker 1: and working extra hours and that would help this woman, 599 00:29:13,800 --> 00:29:16,440 Speaker 1: then I think that would be great. All right, Well, 600 00:29:16,480 --> 00:29:19,440 Speaker 1: this has been best of both worlds. We've been talking 601 00:29:19,520 --> 00:29:22,920 Speaker 1: about our list of good things right now, a question 602 00:29:23,080 --> 00:29:25,760 Speaker 1: about a nanny who sort of lingers at the end 603 00:29:25,800 --> 00:29:29,280 Speaker 1: of the workday and what is reasonable to include. We 604 00:29:29,360 --> 00:29:31,440 Speaker 1: will be back next week with more on making work 605 00:29:31,480 --> 00:29:35,880 Speaker 1: and life fit together. Thanks for listening. You can find 606 00:29:35,920 --> 00:29:39,320 Speaker 1: me Sarah at the shoebox dot com or at the 607 00:29:39,560 --> 00:29:43,560 Speaker 1: Underscore Shoebox on Instagram, and you can find me Laura 608 00:29:43,960 --> 00:29:47,280 Speaker 1: at Laura vandercam dot com. This has been the best 609 00:29:47,320 --> 00:29:50,840 Speaker 1: of both worlds podcasts. Please join us next time for 610 00:29:50,960 --> 00:29:53,320 Speaker 1: more on making work and life work together.