Speaker 1: Welcome to Before Breakfast, a production of My Heart Radio.
Speaker 1: Good Morning. This is Laura. Welcome to the Before Breakfast podcast.
Speaker 1: Today's tip is about one efficient way to add happiness
Speaker 1: into your life. Become a regular somewhere, ideally with good company.
Speaker 1: In a recent episode, we talked about adding more serendipity
Speaker 1: into our daily schedules. This can require new inputs, but
Speaker 1: sometimes we can boost happiness by doubling down on existing
Speaker 1: inputs and going all in to make these a regular
Speaker 1: part of our lives. People my age and older no
Speaker 1: doubt remember the theme song from the TV show Cheers.
Speaker 1: Cheers was a place where everybody knows your name and
Speaker 1: they're always glad you came. It's certainly an appealing concept,
Speaker 1: and one reason some surveys show increased loneliness is that
Speaker 1: isolated with our cell phones, we spend less time going
Speaker 1: to local watering holes or other places. We can become
Speaker 1: part of a community, houses of worship, civic organizations, even
Speaker 1: organized play groups for kids where parents can commiserate to gather.
Speaker 1: We know that social ties tend to make people happier,
Speaker 1: but when people are busy, arranging specific times to get
Speaker 1: together can feel like a ton of work. When you
Speaker 1: always go somewhere at a particular time, though, and other
Speaker 1: people do too, you don't have to do the planning
Speaker 1: and scheduling. You get the relationships without the hassle. And
Speaker 1: by the way, these relationships don't have to be deep,
Speaker 1: soul full sorts of things. Most people will, in fact
Speaker 1: feel happier when the local postal clerk addresses you by
Speaker 1: name and asks about your family. As with all things
Speaker 1: in life, there has to be a balance. You can
Speaker 1: become a regular at a grocery store, but maybe you're
Speaker 1: in a stage of life we're getting groceries delivered makes
Speaker 1: more sense. Too much sameness and routine can be a
Speaker 1: problem too, so I prefer to look at opportunities to
Speaker 1: become a regular somewhere that would happen about once a
Speaker 1: week or so, rather than daily. Fortunately, there are lots
Speaker 1: of opportunities for this. As I look at my life,
Speaker 1: I can see a few places where I might become
Speaker 1: a regular. Most days, I make my own coffee, but
Speaker 1: I pop by my neighborhood coffee shop when I'm in
Speaker 1: the mood for a cappuccino. There are two casual restaurants
Speaker 1: in my area where I've realized after a lot of experimentation,
Speaker 1: that everyone in my family will be happy. So when
Speaker 1: my family is going out to dinner, we go to
Speaker 1: those two places. Over time, you get to know individual
Speaker 1: waiters and specials. Same for the nice adult focused restaurant
Speaker 1: downtown where my husband and I make reservations. When we
Speaker 1: plan to entertain people. It's nice to know exactly where
Speaker 1: to park our guests introduced the novelty, we know the
Speaker 1: venue will be good. Maybe you've got some places like
Speaker 1: this too. Are other things you do semi regularly in life.
Speaker 1: There's a particular teacher at your gym that you always
Speaker 1: enjoy when you manage to get there, or there's a
Speaker 1: lunch spot in your work that you always like when
Speaker 1: you go. To become a regular, and to get the
Speaker 1: most out of this experience, do a few things. First,
Speaker 1: look at your schedule and see if you could build
Speaker 1: visiting this place into your life consistently. The exercise teacher
Speaker 1: might teach on three different days, and sometimes each of
Speaker 1: these is a possibility, but Tuesday nights tend to work
Speaker 1: the best. Could you commit to going the vast majority
Speaker 1: of Tuesday nights? I mean, there's always a reason One
Speaker 1: week here and there won't work. But what if you
Speaker 1: started telling yourself that Tuesday's pilates night. You'd start constructing
Speaker 1: your life to make it possible. And you also wouldn't
Speaker 1: have to think about it. At least one day a week,
Speaker 1: you'd know exactly what you do for exercise. That's a
Speaker 1: great outcome, But to truly get the most out of
Speaker 1: being a regular, don't stop there. You can invite other
Speaker 1: people to join you. It can be casual you tell
Speaker 1: a friend about your great Tuesday night exercise class. Or
Speaker 1: it can be more formal. Maybe you commit to taking
Speaker 1: a different direct report out to lunch at your favorite
Speaker 1: place every Monday. You can rotate through, but you get
Speaker 1: to know the restaurant and you build relationships. And of course,
Speaker 1: once you've decided to become a regular, you can pay
Speaker 1: more attention to the people who are already there. At
Speaker 1: the restaurant, you get to know the hostess and the
Speaker 1: wait staff. Maybe at a bar, as with Cheers, you've
Speaker 1: got your own favorite bartender who you can chat with.
Speaker 1: You notice someone else comes most Tuesday nights the same
Speaker 1: exercise class. Since you've committed to coming, you know it's
Speaker 1: worth introducing yourself and building at least a casual friendship.
Speaker 1: You might not become terribly entwined with each other's lives,
Speaker 1: but it's nice that when you're out sick for a week,
Speaker 1: someone notices and says, we missed you when you come back.
Speaker 1: So look at your life. Where could you become a regular?
Speaker 1: When could you make that happen? Who could join you
Speaker 1: or who would you like to meet? Answering these questions
Speaker 1: can bring a lot of happiness to your life. In
Speaker 1: the meantime, This is Laura. Thanks for listening, and here's
Speaker 1: to making the most of our time. Hey, everybody, I'd
Speaker 1: love to hear from you. You can send me your tips,
Speaker 1: your questions, or anything else. Just connect with me on Twitter, Facebook,
Speaker 1: and Instagram at Before Breakfast pod that's b the number
Speaker 1: four then Breakfast p o D. You can also shoot
Speaker 1: me an email at Before Breakfast podcast at i heeart
Speaker 1: media dot com that Before Breakfast is spelled out with
Speaker 1: all the letters. Thanks so much, I look forward to
Speaker 1: staying in touch. Before Breakfast is a production of I
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