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Speaker 1: Hi guys, and welcome back to another episode of Couch

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Speaker 1: Talks on You Need Therapy podcast. My name is Cat

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Speaker 1: and I'm the host here. If you're new, Hello. First

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Speaker 1: of all, I am a therapist who lives in Nashville

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Speaker 1: who has a podcast that is not therapy, but it's

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Speaker 1: called You Need Therapy. But the podcast might motivate you

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Speaker 1: to go to therapy. But just at the beginning, we

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Speaker 1: like to remind everybody that though I am a therapist

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Speaker 1: and I answer some questions that you guys asked me

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Speaker 1: on here, this itself is not therapy. Now. Couch Talks

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Speaker 1: is the special bonus episode of You Need Therapy that

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Speaker 1: comes out every Wednesday where I answer questions that you

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Speaker 1: guys send into Catherinet You Need Therapy podcast dot com.

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Speaker 1: If you have questions, send them in there. I love

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Speaker 1: getting those. Also, I just realized as I was saying

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Speaker 1: all this, I just said you need therapy and therapy

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Speaker 1: so many times, So I hope that wasn't annoying. I

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Speaker 1: wonder how many times that was It was in under

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Speaker 1: a minute. Anyway, maybe not so important. So on couch

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Speaker 1: Shocks that usually answer two questions that you guys send in, uh,

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Speaker 1: last week, I think I did one and then I

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Speaker 1: talked about something that was on my mind, and this

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Speaker 1: week we're doing the same thing. So I'm gonna answer

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Speaker 1: one question that I got from you guys, and then

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Speaker 1: I also just wanted to stop and chat about kind

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Speaker 1: of Monday's episode. But September is suicide Awareness and Prevention month,

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Speaker 1: and Monday I did a whole episode on suicide with

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Speaker 1: my friend Taylor, who specializes in crisis prevention and intervention.

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Speaker 1: If you have not listened to that episode, please go

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Speaker 1: listen to it, because that is an episode that is

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Speaker 1: for everyone. And I wanted to take a moment to

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Speaker 1: talk about this for a second because I had this

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Speaker 1: big fear that no one was going to listen to

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Speaker 1: that episode. And I know, I know, that's like so

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Speaker 1: messed up, but I'm a human being and I got

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Speaker 1: caught up in this space of wanting to provide a

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Speaker 1: podcast and wanting to provide content that is both entertaining

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Speaker 1: and informative and helpful, and sometimes I get stuck in

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Speaker 1: my head and I was thinking on Sunday night, like

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Speaker 1: what should I call it? What do I want to

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Speaker 1: title this episode? And I was like, honestly, ear muffs

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Speaker 1: for anybody who's listening. I was like, honestly funck that, Like,

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Speaker 1: it's called what it is because it's important to talk

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Speaker 1: about what we were talking about, and the reality is,

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Speaker 1: first of all, y'all listened to it. But I share

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Speaker 1: this because I know some of you guys have this

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Speaker 1: our struggle with the same kind of stuff and the

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Speaker 1: same kind of experiences like I do. And I was

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Speaker 1: so caught up in you guys liking the episode. I

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Speaker 1: got away from the point of it. The point was

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Speaker 1: to offer hope and help to those who needed it

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Speaker 1: and need it in that space. And I don't need

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Speaker 1: it to be one million people. It can be one person,

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Speaker 1: and calling the episode what it is maybe what that

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Speaker 1: one person needs to see in order to click and

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Speaker 1: play it so then they can hear it. So this

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Speaker 1: month and really all the time, but especially this month,

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Speaker 1: let's just call it what it is. Let's call suicide

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Speaker 1: what it is. Let's talk about that, let's bring it up,

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Speaker 1: and let's not water it down. But let's just call

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Speaker 1: all of the things what they are, and let's not

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Speaker 1: water down things so they appeal to more people. I

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Speaker 1: want to encourage all this to show up more authentically,

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Speaker 1: so we appeal to the people who need us, and

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Speaker 1: that speaks to like so much of our lives. And

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Speaker 1: I live by the quote. You probably have heard me

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Speaker 1: say it before. My live by the quote. If everyone

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Speaker 1: likes you, you're not being authentic. And this is not

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Speaker 1: an opinion. This is a fact in my head. It's

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Speaker 1: fact because when everyone likes us, we are watering down

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Speaker 1: who we are in order to appeal to as many

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Speaker 1: people as possible. Now, when we show up authentically, sure

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Speaker 1: less people may like that or like you, but what

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Speaker 1: they are liking is you. When they do like you,

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Speaker 1: they are liking you, and a couple of people liking

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Speaker 1: you as much much, much more satisfying long term than

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Speaker 1: a million people liking a fake version of you. So

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Speaker 1: I just wanted to talk about that and bring that

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Speaker 1: up because that was an experience I was just having

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Speaker 1: the other night where I was like, oh, I don't

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Speaker 1: like this. I'm getting away from the point of this.

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Speaker 1: This is not about getting as many people to like

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Speaker 1: this episode and think it's entertaining, like some of our

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Speaker 1: podcast episodes are more entertaining than others. But the point

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Speaker 1: really is to get information out. That's why I started

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Speaker 1: the podcast to start conversations about things that people are

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Speaker 1: afraid to start conversations about out in the wild. So

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Speaker 1: I'm just giving you a human moment of me and

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Speaker 1: a human experience of me where I too get caught

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Speaker 1: up and wanting to be liked and wanting to be

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Speaker 1: I guess that's a version of like success and wanting

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Speaker 1: the podcast to be successful, where I have to check

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Speaker 1: myself as well. So it's a check in for me,

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Speaker 1: and it's also a check in for y'all of notice

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Speaker 1: where you might be doing that in your life as well.

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Speaker 1: And uh, let's show up as ourselves, the real versions

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Speaker 1: of us, because those are good. Those are good enough.

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Speaker 1: Now let's get into the first or the only question

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Speaker 1: that I have from one of y'all, and here it is.

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Speaker 1: Hi Cat. I have been going through some major life changes,

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Speaker 1: recently a divorce and moving from my home of eleven

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Speaker 1: and a half years. I'm looking at this as an

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Speaker 1: opportunity to do what I want with my life. That

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Speaker 1: being said, I am considering a career change. Is this

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Speaker 1: something that therapists can help me navigate? I am not

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Speaker 1: sure I am in a place mentally to make a

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Speaker 1: huge change right now. I would like to give myself

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Speaker 1: a year to let things settle down before I actually

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Speaker 1: commit the change I am considering would involve moving to

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Speaker 1: another state and working in a completely different field of work.

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Speaker 1: Thanks in advance. Okay, So yes, yes, yes, this is

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Speaker 1: something that a therapist can help with. And I'm also

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Speaker 1: going to take this as a gateway opportunity to talk

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Speaker 1: about misconceptions of therapists and speak to the traditional view

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Speaker 1: of therapy and what we do in the reality. So

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Speaker 1: in the past and now too, but more more in

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Speaker 1: the past were making some moves and even when I

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Speaker 1: was a kid, had I'm not talking about like fifty

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Speaker 1: years ago. Even although this was very different fifty years ago.

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Speaker 1: It recently this has been the conception therapy and therapists

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Speaker 1: were kind of looked at as weird depending on where

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Speaker 1: you lived. Weird might be the wrong word, but there's

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Speaker 1: a stigma depend on where you live and your experience

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Speaker 1: with them and all of that. And I've told the

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Speaker 1: story before about my first experience of therapy and why

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Speaker 1: I went and how I felt, and well, you know,

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Speaker 1: I hated it. I called I called the therapist the lady,

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Speaker 1: and it was it very much felt like I was

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Speaker 1: in trouble and it was something I was embarrassed about doing.

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Speaker 1: So that wasn't that long ago, twenty years ago. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I didn't tell people where I was going. I didn't

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Speaker 1: want to go. I was embarrassed to talk about it

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Speaker 1: even with the people that did know I was going.

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Speaker 1: And I also I was one of the kids that

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Speaker 1: went to therapy and didn't speak. So God bless you lady,

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Speaker 1: wherever you are. I wish I knew your day. But

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Speaker 1: here's the truth that I think gets lost and has

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Speaker 1: been lost. Nothing needs to be wrong for someone to

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Speaker 1: go to therapy. You may just want to get to

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Speaker 1: know yourself better or have a safe place to process

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Speaker 1: your life with someone who's not in your life. That's it.

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Speaker 1: That's that's enough reason. Now, therapists generally have specialties, and

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Speaker 1: so there are some therapists who primarily work with trauma

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Speaker 1: or eating disorders, or addiction or o c D, anxiety, depression,

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Speaker 1: personality disorders, et cetera. Now there's also some therapists that

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Speaker 1: specialized in life transitions and adjustments, which we all go

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Speaker 1: through and we all have those. And just because your

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Speaker 1: life is in a transition doesn't mean there's something wrong

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Speaker 1: just might mean you want to talk about it with somebody.

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Speaker 1: I think we are seeing way more of the therapist

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Speaker 1: that specialized in that now, And also some therapists do both,

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Speaker 1: So like I specialize in eating disorders, but I do

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Speaker 1: a lot of work with lines around life transitions and adjustments.

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Speaker 1: And also I want to shift the way we're even

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Speaker 1: talking about things being wrong. Having an even these sort

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Speaker 1: of doesn't mean you're wrong. It just means that you

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Speaker 1: need some help with the coping strategies you have developed

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Speaker 1: to survive. So there's that because therapy has been for

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Speaker 1: the people that have something wrong with them, I guess

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Speaker 1: I'm doing air quotes. You can't see that people who

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Speaker 1: have struggles, or have developed unhealthy coping mechanisms, or have

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Speaker 1: had adverse reactions to trauma, they're looked at as almost

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Speaker 1: like less than like something's wrong with them. Like no,

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Speaker 1: they're just trying to survive. Now. Just like there are

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Speaker 1: different kinds of therapists that have different specialties, there's also

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Speaker 1: different kinds of therapy as well, And there are therapists

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Speaker 1: who have a very solution focused approach. And you come

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Speaker 1: in with an issue, you have a certain number of sessions.

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Speaker 1: You focus on a certain thing each session and you

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Speaker 1: only talk about that issue, and then once you're done

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Speaker 1: in the solution or the problem has been resolved, you're

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Speaker 1: done with therapy and you move on. Therapy doesn't always

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Speaker 1: have to be this long drawn out, not that I

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Speaker 1: think of as long and john out, but you don't

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Speaker 1: have to see your therapist for years and years and years.

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Speaker 1: You might see them for a couple of months. You

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Speaker 1: might see him for a couple of sessions, and that's okay.

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Speaker 1: And the best metaphor that I can come up with

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Speaker 1: now is like looking at a therapist kind of like

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Speaker 1: a doctor, which we're both in the health field. So

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Speaker 1: you have doctors that you go into for specific things,

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Speaker 1: and then you have like a general practitioner like your

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Speaker 1: family doctor. You don't just go to the doctor for

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Speaker 1: things that cancer and broken bones. You also go to

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Speaker 1: the doctor when you just need to check up or

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Speaker 1: a physical. And that doesn't mean you're sick, right, nothing's wrong.

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Speaker 1: You just want to make sure that something isn't going

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Speaker 1: on that you might be missing, right, just to check up. Now,

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Speaker 1: to get more specific on this actual question, Yes, a

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Speaker 1: therapist can help with this. This is such a coal

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Speaker 1: opportunity to learn about yourself and have a sounding board

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Speaker 1: that may ask questions that you would never ask yourself.

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Speaker 1: You wouldn't have think to ask, or maybe just like

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Speaker 1: maybe you would have asked that question yourself. But hearing

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Speaker 1: yourself say it out loud to somebody else brings up

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Speaker 1: other things, and it gives you a place to say officially,

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Speaker 1: talk about what you want and why with someone who

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Speaker 1: has no agenda other than to help you, to help

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Speaker 1: you figure it out, and the bias is somewhat removed.

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Speaker 1: We have a little bit of a bias because we're humans,

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Speaker 1: but it's somewhat removed from that that of like a friend.

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Speaker 1: Because if you move so you say you might move

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Speaker 1: for this job, we don't really care. I mean like

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Speaker 1: we care in the sense that we want you to

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Speaker 1: be happy, but we don't have buy into your decision. Also,

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Speaker 1: some therapists are trained in certain kinds of testing and

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Speaker 1: stuff like that where they can help you identify strengths

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Speaker 1: and careers that best fit your personality and lifestyle. Side

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Speaker 1: notes that I'm excited about. I have a conversation coming

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Speaker 1: out with someone that I am really excited to share

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Speaker 1: with you. It's coming out in a couple of weeks.

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Speaker 1: And this human has recently come out with a book

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Speaker 1: that is and will be so so so helpful when

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Speaker 1: it comes to work, life flow and satisfaction. So stay

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Speaker 1: tuned that I think is coming out September. So I'm

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Speaker 1: just teasing that and really to app all of this up. Obviously,

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Speaker 1: I am a therapist who I'm a dent pro therapy

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Speaker 1: all of the time, well pro therapy all of the time,

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Speaker 1: And I do want to say to anyone who has

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Speaker 1: been skeptical of therapy, you don't have to go. But

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Speaker 1: remember going doesn't mean something is wrong with you. Also,

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Speaker 1: if you're struggling with something that's okay, that doesn't mean

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Speaker 1: you're a bad or wrong person or less than now.

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Speaker 1: Because it doesn't mean something's wrong with you. It also

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Speaker 1: might mean something that's very very right with you. That

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Speaker 1: you know that there is more for you that you

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Speaker 1: can see from your advantage point. Right now, you are

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Speaker 1: recognizing that you are limited because you're one person that

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Speaker 1: has essentially one point of view. To me, that means

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Speaker 1: there's something right with you. There's nothing shameful about sharing

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Speaker 1: your story with someone who has trained to honor it

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Speaker 1: and Again, not everyone needs to go to therapy or

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Speaker 1: has to go, but I do believe that we can

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Speaker 1: all benefit from it when we find the right fit.

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Speaker 1: So I just want to throw out some of that

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Speaker 1: encouragement because therapy is shifting and changing. How we're talking

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Speaker 1: about therapy is shifting and changing. What we know about

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Speaker 1: therapy is shifting and changing, and I am so grateful

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Speaker 1: for that, and I want to continue to encourage people

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Speaker 1: that it's okay to try it. It's also okay to

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Speaker 1: try it and I'm not like it and then be like, Okay,

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Speaker 1: I did it. Now. To wrap all this up, I

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Speaker 1: just want to continue, of course, as the human I am,

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Speaker 1: to encourage anyone who is thinking about therapy that it's

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Speaker 1: okay for you to try it out. It's okay for

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Speaker 1: you to go. It doesn't mean anything is messed up

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Speaker 1: about who you are. It really just means that you

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Speaker 1: care about your life. Okay, guys, thank you for listening

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Speaker 1: today or whatever day it is that you are listening.

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Speaker 1: And I hope that you can use some of what

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Speaker 1: I've said as encouragement to continue to strive to live

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Speaker 1: the most authentic and real life that you can. And

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Speaker 1: I hope you have the day you need to have

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Speaker 1: and the week you need to have, and I will

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Speaker 1: be back on Monday.