WEBVTT - 404: Micro 0:00:17.480 --> 0:00:20.000 Hello, everybody, Hello, everybody. 0:00:18.880 --> 0:00:20.200 Hey Hannah, how are you? 0:00:20.280 --> 0:00:25.960 Hello? Hello? Hello. I'm doing a great I will say this. 0:00:26.040 --> 0:00:28.920 I have a lot of things in my life that 0:00:28.960 --> 0:00:33.720 bother me and need improvement for sure. But the one 0:00:33.720 --> 0:00:38.560 thing I have and you also have, is really good skin. 0:00:39.120 --> 0:00:42.680 That's just genetics. I do have really good skin, and 0:00:42.800 --> 0:00:50.800 so lo and behold my horror today. Oh no, I 0:00:50.840 --> 0:00:55.920 got a pimple and I was just like, I'm invited 0:00:55.920 --> 0:00:56.920 to my list of issues. 0:00:57.320 --> 0:00:58.600 You're on your own, you. 0:01:00.600 --> 0:01:02.560 Know I do too. So I'm wearing this pimple patch. 0:01:02.600 --> 0:01:04.399 You see that this is the worst place to get 0:01:04.400 --> 0:01:06.680 it here or like at the tip of your nose, 0:01:06.760 --> 0:01:09.080 Like that's the worst to get them on your lips. 0:01:09.080 --> 0:01:10.319 You don't want to get a pimple on your. 0:01:10.200 --> 0:01:14.000 Lip, but that's something. Yeah, there's no such thing as 0:01:14.000 --> 0:01:14.560 a pimple. 0:01:15.000 --> 0:01:20.080 A pimple on your lip, but yeah, like right here 0:01:20.160 --> 0:01:20.640 or right here. 0:01:20.680 --> 0:01:23.720 And this one sucks because I don't First of all, 0:01:23.720 --> 0:01:26.399 these patches don't work. I guess all they do is 0:01:26.440 --> 0:01:30.520 just cover it for the world not to see because 0:01:30.520 --> 0:01:32.800 they don't get rid of them. This isn't This is 0:01:32.840 --> 0:01:35.280 going on day three with this fing thing on my 0:01:35.319 --> 0:01:36.920 face and it's still there. 0:01:36.920 --> 0:01:38.800 Here's the thing I will say. I'm team like Love 0:01:38.840 --> 0:01:41.360 Island with this stuff. Do you ever watch Love Island. 0:01:41.120 --> 0:01:43.000 And don't have to be some dumb ship like that? 0:01:45.600 --> 0:01:48.920 Okay, fine, well you're missing out. But here's what they do. 0:01:49.440 --> 0:01:51.680 When they all get pimples, they put like their pimple 0:01:51.680 --> 0:01:56.160 patches are stars. They just own it. Yeah, generation man, 0:01:56.280 --> 0:01:58.400 I love it so much. They're just like, here it is. 0:01:59.080 --> 0:02:01.400 Put a start. I'm gonna make a beautiful muskin is 0:02:01.440 --> 0:02:02.160 going through something. 0:02:02.200 --> 0:02:04.480 And you're smart because it's like you're gonna be Look 0:02:04.520 --> 0:02:06.520 if somebody has a pimple on like a note, like 0:02:06.560 --> 0:02:09.200 an obvious noticeable pimple on their forehead or somewhere, you're 0:02:09.240 --> 0:02:11.280 gonna look at it. It's not gonna bother you, but 0:02:11.320 --> 0:02:12.200 you're gonna look at it. 0:02:12.480 --> 0:02:14.440 And then I'm telling you this one is like it's 0:02:14.480 --> 0:02:15.079 a big guy. 0:02:15.240 --> 0:02:16.440 Yeah, but if you put a star on it, people 0:02:16.440 --> 0:02:17.919 are gonna look. It's you're gonna look anyway, so you 0:02:17.960 --> 0:02:18.760 may as well look at a star. 0:02:19.639 --> 0:02:20.000 That's right. 0:02:20.040 --> 0:02:20.680 That's what I'm saying. 0:02:20.720 --> 0:02:24.120 Put a gold star on it, That's what I'm saying. 0:02:24.919 --> 0:02:27.080 I will say, I know everybody's been really worried about 0:02:27.080 --> 0:02:29.240 my mess around sweater that I spilled on last week. 0:02:29.400 --> 0:02:34.240 So it's back me too. 0:02:37.480 --> 0:02:39.799 You got too many jobs, That's what I learned about you. 0:02:39.760 --> 0:02:42.480 You've got too many jobs. Job, you got too many things, 0:02:42.480 --> 0:02:45.720 all right, you guys? It is the mess around And 0:02:45.800 --> 0:02:49.200 this is by far one of the most talked about 0:02:49.280 --> 0:02:59.280 episodes have. It is called micro. It's called micro. Y'all know, 0:02:59.720 --> 0:03:01.640 if you're listening to this podcast, I know you know it. 0:03:01.720 --> 0:03:03.480 If I know, you don't even have to rewatch it to. 0:03:03.600 --> 0:03:06.040 Now listening to this podcast, this particular episode, you know 0:03:06.120 --> 0:03:09.480 the episode, but you also may know the issue that 0:03:09.919 --> 0:03:13.040 the issue may be something that you've personally dealt with 0:03:13.120 --> 0:03:16.880 in your life, which I think not a lot of 0:03:16.919 --> 0:03:17.400 people have. 0:03:17.520 --> 0:03:21.440 But yeah, it's called micro because of you know, micro penis, 0:03:22.040 --> 0:03:23.160 says micro pain. 0:03:24.680 --> 0:03:25.280 Should we do? 0:03:27.560 --> 0:03:29.960 After discovering that the guy she's talking to has a 0:03:30.040 --> 0:03:34.160 micro penis, Jess makes a bet with Nick that she 0:03:34.160 --> 0:03:36.000 can stay in the relationship for over a month to 0:03:36.040 --> 0:03:40.640 prove she isn't shallow. Meanwhile, Winston, CC, Trick Schmidt, and 0:03:40.680 --> 0:03:43.720 coach As are competing for a modeling gig. It's a 0:03:43.800 --> 0:03:46.800 classic Winston and CC mess around. 0:03:47.800 --> 0:03:48.520 That's not a thing. 0:03:49.120 --> 0:04:06.600 So she says, we'll be right back, and we are back. 0:04:08.240 --> 0:04:12.320 This is honestly one of the funniest written episodes ever. 0:04:13.800 --> 0:04:16.599 Bye of Course. The Great Josh ma. 0:04:16.839 --> 0:04:23.960 Yes Josh Malmith directed by Jay Schandra Shaker. He is 0:04:24.000 --> 0:04:26.279 a fantastic director. 0:04:26.000 --> 0:04:31.000 Fantastic director, human person. He was a great director to 0:04:31.000 --> 0:04:32.919 work with. He's like, so you know what it is, 0:04:32.960 --> 0:04:36.320 he still has like the joy. There's zero things that 0:04:36.360 --> 0:04:38.640 are jaded about Jay. When he was on set, like 0:04:38.680 --> 0:04:40.960 he was just like so happy. He thought the bits 0:04:41.000 --> 0:04:43.320 were so funny. You can see in that cold open 0:04:43.480 --> 0:04:47.159 when they're doing like the boobs say like I like 0:04:47.200 --> 0:04:50.600 those people. Like when they're doing the boobs whole conversation, 0:04:51.200 --> 0:04:53.279 you can just feel Jay just being like happy to 0:04:53.360 --> 0:04:56.320 let it go, like just run with it, guys, get 0:04:56.320 --> 0:04:59.039 weird with it because there's so much in a group shot. Yeah, 0:04:59.080 --> 0:05:00.880 because he's just like having that energy. 0:05:00.880 --> 0:05:02.839 Oh yeah, because you have to. Yeah, imagine he's still 0:05:02.839 --> 0:05:06.039 a performer. He still acts. So that's why you know, 0:05:06.120 --> 0:05:08.080 when you're an actor and you see the bits, it's 0:05:08.080 --> 0:05:10.560 almost like he wants to jump in and play himself. 0:05:10.920 --> 0:05:13.560 Shocked. We never had shock. He was never in an episode. 0:05:13.480 --> 0:05:15.040 Ye, that's true. That was a miss. 0:05:15.160 --> 0:05:18.000 Yeah complete miss Oh girl, what a miss? 0:05:18.000 --> 0:05:21.000 Complete miss? You use this diver off camera? 0:05:21.080 --> 0:05:23.159 Only they should have cast him. I guess maybe the 0:05:23.200 --> 0:05:25.279 only role available if he wanted to act in director 0:05:25.400 --> 0:05:27.000 was to be the micrope guy. And he's like, you 0:05:27.000 --> 0:05:27.320 know what. 0:05:29.120 --> 0:05:31.480 Jay was like, you know what, I don't need the reputation. 0:05:33.520 --> 0:05:33.920 That's okay. 0:05:34.000 --> 0:05:37.320 He's directed a bunch of these episodes though, yeah, he 0:05:37.360 --> 0:05:37.839 did a few. 0:05:39.279 --> 0:05:42.720 Anyway, we're at this bar. Anyway, at this bar, Hannah, 0:05:42.760 --> 0:05:44.760 what's going on at this bar? The guys are just 0:05:44.800 --> 0:05:47.360 talking about boobies, as men do, right. 0:05:48.080 --> 0:05:51.240 I think what's so great and funny and weird about 0:05:51.240 --> 0:05:55.159 this gold open is that they're saying all the quiet 0:05:55.200 --> 0:06:00.000 parts out loud. Yeah, Like I do think right. Attracts 0:06:00.600 --> 0:06:04.120 is a part of picking your partner, not a friend, 0:06:04.240 --> 0:06:08.000 but like a partner. And so attraction is that you're 0:06:08.000 --> 0:06:10.279 gonna have things that you're more drawn to or less 0:06:10.400 --> 0:06:13.520 drawn to. And so that conversation about being shallow or 0:06:13.520 --> 0:06:16.680 not I think is super interesting. But usually you're not 0:06:16.839 --> 0:06:19.200 openly at the bar being like I like those boobies, 0:06:19.279 --> 0:06:22.280 those are great boobies. That's not going to resonate. Well, no, 0:06:22.320 --> 0:06:24.240 but the person that also wants to have an emotional 0:06:24.240 --> 0:06:26.200 connection as well as the physical cost. 0:06:26.200 --> 0:06:27.800 So guys don't do this, you know what? You know who? 0:06:27.800 --> 0:06:32.400 I have some friends who are are in their sixties, 0:06:33.440 --> 0:06:36.479 late fifties, sixties, and when they're trying to be cool 0:06:36.560 --> 0:06:39.960 and they're hanging out, they start speaking this way because 0:06:39.960 --> 0:06:43.600 they think that this is how the other guys talk. 0:06:43.839 --> 0:06:46.720 And you got to constantly like correct them and go, bro, 0:06:46.839 --> 0:06:47.280 you good. 0:06:48.200 --> 0:06:51.039 Like a moment walks by, look at look at the 0:06:51.160 --> 0:06:55.720 rack on that check and you're like, what you know, 0:06:55.760 --> 0:06:57.840 we never did that. That was a TV fit. 0:06:58.080 --> 0:07:01.359 That was like a movie's a TV stereotype about what 0:07:01.440 --> 0:07:03.239 we You don't have to say that out loud. 0:07:04.600 --> 0:07:08.080 It is a crazy thing. Also, I knew, I knew 0:07:08.120 --> 0:07:10.640 you were going to say the word rack. The rack 0:07:10.840 --> 0:07:14.400 conversation is also crazy to call it a rack of what? 0:07:14.800 --> 0:07:16.920 Oh you know, I was trying to be gentle. What 0:07:16.960 --> 0:07:20.360 the words for what they were really really saying? 0:07:21.320 --> 0:07:23.400 Yeah, No, no one's out here talking like that, and 0:07:23.440 --> 0:07:25.960 if they are, it's very like forty year old vergin Ya. 0:07:26.040 --> 0:07:28.480 I'm just like, oh, you've never seen like breasts. Yeah, 0:07:28.560 --> 0:07:30.680 you've never actually seen them with your own eyeballs, like 0:07:30.720 --> 0:07:32.400 real human right breasts. 0:07:32.520 --> 0:07:33.600 Yeah, so that's good to know. 0:07:33.640 --> 0:07:37.400 I learned so much about you. So Jess is on 0:07:37.440 --> 0:07:40.240 a whole tip because she's just like, I'm not shallow. 0:07:40.600 --> 0:07:42.760 I don't sit there and pick my partner just based 0:07:42.800 --> 0:07:46.640 on what they look like. And then she kind of 0:07:46.720 --> 0:07:48.880 challenges Nick and she's like, would you have ruled me 0:07:48.960 --> 0:07:51.640 out for my boobs? And he's like no, because they're perfect. 0:07:51.720 --> 0:07:55.640 But then you're won. And then that thing when they 0:07:55.720 --> 0:08:00.160 cut to you guys all getting so close to it 0:08:00.200 --> 0:08:02.720 is so funny to me, Oh my god. 0:08:02.800 --> 0:08:04.400 You know what I hated about this moment? I think 0:08:05.160 --> 0:08:09.440 what that they would uh you know, they they it 0:08:09.480 --> 0:08:10.000 was a script. 0:08:10.000 --> 0:08:11.240 It was scripted, so I said it, and you know, 0:08:11.280 --> 0:08:12.960 it's a funny bit where I go, You're at eight, 0:08:12.960 --> 0:08:14.240 You're at eight and a half, and I'm a. 0:08:14.160 --> 0:08:23.600 Sweet, sweet six. You know, I have you know, sons 0:08:23.600 --> 0:08:25.320 of bitches I have. 0:08:25.760 --> 0:08:29.560 You know that that same year, I want to say 0:08:29.600 --> 0:08:30.520 it was that same year. 0:08:31.200 --> 0:08:33.319 Maybe it was a year later, who knows. 0:08:33.800 --> 0:08:38.600 Cosmo magazine called me one of the hottest TV actors 0:08:38.880 --> 0:08:44.280 of all time and I was number thirty. You know, 0:08:44.320 --> 0:08:45.880 who was you know who was you know who was 0:08:45.920 --> 0:08:53.640 thirty one? George Colooney. Yeah, I didn't see Max on 0:08:53.679 --> 0:08:54.160 that list. 0:08:55.240 --> 0:08:56.680 I didn't see Damon on that list. 0:08:57.400 --> 0:08:59.200 So while I'm getting while the writers are saying that 0:08:59.200 --> 0:09:00.840 they're eight, eight and a half and I'm a six, 0:09:00.880 --> 0:09:05.840 I got something. I got news for you. Fuck you anyway, 0:09:06.320 --> 0:09:07.160 That's what I got to. 0:09:07.160 --> 0:09:07.839 Say about it. 0:09:08.160 --> 0:09:10.280 Here's the part that made me laugh the most is 0:09:10.320 --> 0:09:12.959 that you give these compliments, then you do something that's 0:09:12.960 --> 0:09:16.240 self deprecating and you say six, which is obviously not true, 0:09:16.520 --> 0:09:20.079 and nobody challenges it. It's the funniest part. Nobody goes, 0:09:20.120 --> 0:09:25.160 come on, man, no at least a seven. No, Nope, 0:09:25.280 --> 0:09:26.920 I don't want that's where they did your dirty that 0:09:26.960 --> 0:09:27.840 everyone went, yeah. 0:09:27.880 --> 0:09:29.719 Every dirty And you know what, I'm okay with it. 0:09:30.160 --> 0:09:30.640 I'm okay. 0:09:31.480 --> 0:09:34.600 I'm almost okay with it because I'm not sure who's 0:09:34.679 --> 0:09:35.240 laughing now? 0:09:35.400 --> 0:09:37.760 This is true? And we know that they give the 0:09:37.800 --> 0:09:41.079 Emmys to the most attractive actor that year. 0:09:41.240 --> 0:09:43.240 That's how you that's all you know, because you got 0:09:43.240 --> 0:09:43.719 to get out there. 0:09:43.679 --> 0:09:45.800 Who's the hottest guy that year? And then they go like, 0:09:45.800 --> 0:09:46.600 here's a nice one. 0:09:46.960 --> 0:09:50.600 You know what, I'm saying to Josh Melmouth, where your 0:09:50.679 --> 0:09:50.800 is that? 0:09:54.400 --> 0:09:55.280 Doesn't he have one? 0:09:55.440 --> 0:09:55.880 Probably? 0:09:59.480 --> 0:10:01.680 Oh my god. Okay, so hold on a second, because 0:10:01.800 --> 0:10:09.800 Alan Richard Richmon Richson, very good looking man, jumps it. 0:10:09.880 --> 0:10:12.200 I'm looking up right now all the stuff he has done. 0:10:12.320 --> 0:10:15.760 Reacher, are you kidding me? Is he the star? 0:10:15.880 --> 0:10:16.360 And Reacher? 0:10:16.520 --> 0:10:17.240 Yeah? 0:10:17.360 --> 0:10:20.679 Is he Reacheracher? He's mister Reacher. 0:10:22.320 --> 0:10:27.240 What Alan? The dude is a beast. The dude is 0:10:27.320 --> 0:10:29.600 a yeah, mi mega star. 0:10:30.920 --> 0:10:34.840 He was on American Idol doing what like Paula up singing? 0:10:35.080 --> 0:10:35.800 He wasn't. 0:10:37.080 --> 0:10:38.959 His appearance on the show was noted for his strip 0:10:39.040 --> 0:10:41.640 teas in one episode in which he charmed Judge Paula 0:10:41.640 --> 0:10:45.640 Abduel during his audition. This is American Idol. He was 0:10:45.760 --> 0:10:48.959 one of the top eighty seven contestants in the third season, 0:10:49.040 --> 0:10:50.760 but was cut before the Hollywood. 0:10:50.360 --> 0:10:51.360 Round, which is so crazy. 0:10:51.480 --> 0:10:53.400 That must have been before it was The Blue Mountain 0:10:53.400 --> 0:10:58.439 State he was on and those shows, I think, because. 0:10:58.160 --> 0:11:01.199 That was before A New Girl too. It must have 0:11:01.240 --> 0:11:01.760 been before then. 0:11:01.840 --> 0:11:03.600 Yeah, but he's not a bunch of movies like really 0:11:03.600 --> 0:11:09.160 cool movies and yeah, gentleman, was that a movie that 0:11:09.240 --> 0:11:09.720 he just did? 0:11:09.880 --> 0:11:13.600 I don't know. Alan what a career you've had. 0:11:13.480 --> 0:11:17.720 With Gonzales and Henry cavill. 0:11:19.120 --> 0:11:19.320 Oh. 0:11:19.400 --> 0:11:21.600 I think it was a guy Richie, but. 0:11:21.559 --> 0:11:24.160 He uh, he just joined the cast of Fast X. 0:11:24.440 --> 0:11:26.160 Yeah. He's been in Fast and Furious. He was in 0:11:26.160 --> 0:11:27.760 The Fat he's in the Fast Fast. 0:11:28.040 --> 0:11:30.240 He looks that way like when they cut across and 0:11:30.240 --> 0:11:31.839 she's like sitting in the booth and she's like, oh 0:11:31.840 --> 0:11:33.480 my god, my friends are the worst. I'm just gonna 0:11:33.480 --> 0:11:35.480 sit here because they're so shallow, and then whatever, and 0:11:35.520 --> 0:11:37.800 then she looks up and then she like forgets how 0:11:37.840 --> 0:11:41.880 to just speak word. He just has that whole Hemsworth 0:11:41.960 --> 0:11:45.000 like vibe with the two and the thing and the brooding. 0:11:45.600 --> 0:11:51.240 Yeah, and she's just like, I know the feeling. 0:11:51.280 --> 0:11:53.760 That thing that Zoe does where she's like just needs 0:11:53.800 --> 0:11:56.280 a second to get the words out is everything. 0:11:56.760 --> 0:11:58.600 Like I know the feeling women when they see me. 0:11:58.840 --> 0:12:03.680 It's a very similar, very very similar, very similar. 0:12:04.760 --> 0:12:06.880 Yeah, sure, I just don't know how to talk. 0:12:07.080 --> 0:12:07.640 Yeah, exactly. 0:12:08.240 --> 0:12:10.400 I will say it was a wild thing, and I 0:12:10.400 --> 0:12:12.800 thought it was a really strong choice for the episode 0:12:12.960 --> 0:12:16.280 that he says it out the gate where he's just like, 0:12:16.320 --> 0:12:20.520 I just want you to know full disclosure. I have 0:12:20.559 --> 0:12:23.920 a very very very very very very very tiny panis. 0:12:24.360 --> 0:12:25.840 You know what, you know what, you know what I blame. 0:12:25.880 --> 0:12:26.640 I blame the parents. 0:12:28.120 --> 0:12:30.120 I blame the parents for not like because you could 0:12:30.160 --> 0:12:31.679 nip that in the bud like when they're like when 0:12:31.679 --> 0:12:35.520 they're young, you could you should know like, Okay, this 0:12:35.559 --> 0:12:38.120 ain't this ain't right, and you got to do something 0:12:38.120 --> 0:12:38.560 about it. 0:12:38.640 --> 0:12:40.839 Then see what my brain went to. You know what 0:12:40.880 --> 0:12:47.680 I thought you were talking about when you said I 0:12:47.720 --> 0:12:50.120 blame the parents, I thought you meant, like, you know, 0:12:50.200 --> 0:12:53.400 two people that have the same kind of issue, shouldn't 0:12:53.480 --> 0:12:58.160 like breed and have a child, and to get the 0:12:58.280 --> 0:13:01.240 wife's like dad to be like we should let's cross 0:13:01.280 --> 0:13:03.079 reference these penises because the. 0:13:03.000 --> 0:13:05.320 Wife's dad has a micro and then the dad has 0:13:05.360 --> 0:13:09.880 a micro maybe a micro yeah no, But there's like 0:13:09.920 --> 0:13:12.559 things you can do to stimulate the petuitary gland. That's 0:13:12.559 --> 0:13:15.240 got to be an issue with the petuitary gland. That's 0:13:15.320 --> 0:13:20.840 that's stopping the process of natural human growth hormone. Because 0:13:20.920 --> 0:13:25.320 that is crazy. It's crazy that he is that big, 0:13:25.360 --> 0:13:28.480 which means his body got big, but the one thing didn't. 0:13:29.040 --> 0:13:33.720 That's the one thing stay tiny, yea. But he owns it. 0:13:33.840 --> 0:13:35.760 He's like, Okay, this is what it is, and he 0:13:35.880 --> 0:13:39.679 is so good looking that it obviously has not been 0:13:39.720 --> 0:13:40.200 an issue. 0:13:40.240 --> 0:13:41.760 Can be blessed with both, you know what I'm saying. 0:13:42.800 --> 0:13:46.079 Mm hmm. So then she they go they're going to 0:13:46.120 --> 0:13:50.800 go on a date, and she does this bet. 0:13:51.200 --> 0:13:55.000 Yes, he does the bet with with with Nick. 0:13:55.280 --> 0:13:58.240 Nick that she's going to stay in this relationship for 0:13:58.360 --> 0:14:03.400 like a month, No big deal because she's not shallow, right, 0:14:04.280 --> 0:14:06.080 and she's very excited about it. She thinks it's gonna 0:14:06.120 --> 0:14:10.480 be no issue. It's totally fine because spoiler alert, she 0:14:10.559 --> 0:14:13.560 does not know that he as a human being is. 0:14:13.440 --> 0:14:15.880 The worst, absolute worst, you know. 0:14:16.280 --> 0:14:19.360 And he plays it, by the way, so perfectly because 0:14:19.360 --> 0:14:22.560 I got the itch so badly from him the entire time. 0:14:23.240 --> 0:14:26.480 I was so grossed out by what is on the 0:14:26.480 --> 0:14:28.280 surface a very good looking person, and I was just 0:14:28.320 --> 0:14:30.920 like watching it, I was like, oh, which means. 0:14:30.720 --> 0:14:32.120 He's a great actor, great actor. 0:14:32.200 --> 0:14:32.920 Where do you go? Alan? 0:14:33.120 --> 0:14:33.320 Now? 0:14:33.960 --> 0:14:35.800 Now, let's talk about it. I was disgusted by let's 0:14:35.800 --> 0:14:38.960 talk about this. The bet wages. What's on the line here. 0:14:40.520 --> 0:14:44.880 Because because if Nick loses, he has to donate five 0:14:44.960 --> 0:14:47.680 hundred dollars of the National organization for women's Love Your 0:14:47.720 --> 0:14:51.240 Body campaign and if Nick wins, just to buy him 0:14:51.280 --> 0:14:52.720 a subscription to ass chat. 0:14:53.680 --> 0:14:57.120 But do you remember the names some of the names 0:14:57.120 --> 0:14:58.560 that we were throwing out when he was like, what's 0:14:58.600 --> 0:14:59.400 sighting Nubian? 0:15:03.600 --> 0:15:04.680 These were all improvised. 0:15:06.640 --> 0:15:07.880 I never went back and looked it up. 0:15:07.920 --> 0:15:09.440 It's off that any of these names were real if 0:15:09.480 --> 0:15:11.280 they existed, But I'm sure they do. 0:15:11.600 --> 0:15:15.440 I mean, if they did, they got like Freem for sure. 0:15:15.920 --> 0:15:17.840 Mad as a street artist. He paints on walls. 0:15:19.880 --> 0:15:22.680 Just this, did you say, like a rat with a 0:15:22.720 --> 0:15:25.440 backpack or something? That's what I see when I see 0:15:25.440 --> 0:15:28.040 the wall. I was just like, oh no. 0:15:29.080 --> 0:15:31.280 It was so funny how she's describing you, you know 0:15:31.320 --> 0:15:32.160 what I mean, like. 0:15:32.320 --> 0:15:35.160 Oh yeah, the boys sit around and they're staring at 0:15:35.160 --> 0:15:38.400 a micro penis, and then they all describe what the 0:15:38.480 --> 0:15:41.280 micro penis looks like, like a what like a lone 0:15:41.360 --> 0:15:45.320 tent and a very vast fast, vast fast fast. 0:15:47.320 --> 0:15:50.440 Oh my gosh, Schmidt wants to Schmid says, if he could, 0:15:50.520 --> 0:15:52.000 he would give him some of his penis. 0:15:52.000 --> 0:15:54.120 But you don't pull he don't pull a bump off 0:15:54.120 --> 0:15:57.160 of a Ferrari out of control. 0:15:57.840 --> 0:16:00.440 Oh yeah, schmid coacher at the bar, and they're just 0:16:00.640 --> 0:16:03.880 complimenting each other because now they feel really good about 0:16:03.880 --> 0:16:07.000 themselves that they've seen a micro penis, and so they're 0:16:07.040 --> 0:16:14.720 complimenting and complimenting, and Winston and CC are getting annoyed 0:16:14.840 --> 0:16:19.760 death at the situation and realize, how can we mess 0:16:20.480 --> 0:16:22.480 with these idiots? 0:16:22.720 --> 0:16:23.080 Yes? 0:16:23.120 --> 0:16:24.400 And make them make fools of themselves? 0:16:24.520 --> 0:16:28.480 Yes, is this the moment in which we describe what's 0:16:28.480 --> 0:16:31.200 about to happen between us? Or No, that's not it. 0:16:31.240 --> 0:16:34.560 We'll get into that a little bit later before. But 0:16:35.160 --> 0:16:37.160 let's let's let's go to a quick commercial break. And 0:16:37.160 --> 0:16:39.240 when we come back, there's a there's a section that 0:16:39.280 --> 0:16:40.480 I want to bring up, and I'm not going to 0:16:40.520 --> 0:16:41.840 bring it up because it's useless. 0:16:42.280 --> 0:16:44.480 But and then we're going to move on. 0:16:44.880 --> 0:16:59.520 Okay, and we are back. 0:17:00.640 --> 0:17:03.200 We're back, and Jess has learned that this guy is 0:17:03.240 --> 0:17:07.639 the absolute worst person in the entire world and she 0:17:07.880 --> 0:17:10.320 needs out of the bet. And she says it's not 0:17:10.359 --> 0:17:12.600 because of the micro which, by the way, she's telling 0:17:12.640 --> 0:17:15.639 the truth, she hasn't even like seen or dealt with 0:17:15.640 --> 0:17:19.040 it in any situation. She just can't even be around 0:17:19.040 --> 0:17:23.000 this person for five minutes she's just so deeply ickified. Yes, 0:17:24.320 --> 0:17:27.200 but of course the math does not math to Nick. 0:17:27.359 --> 0:17:30.320 So he's like, nah, you made that bet. 0:17:30.880 --> 0:17:32.160 Yeah, I gotta say you got too. 0:17:33.920 --> 0:17:37.119 So Jess is like, listen, listen man, I'm gonna be 0:17:37.119 --> 0:17:39.520 out of town for the next month. 0:17:40.040 --> 0:17:46.200 He says, for truth, for truth, for this is so stupid. 0:17:46.960 --> 0:17:48.440 For truth, you know, that's like. 0:17:48.400 --> 0:17:51.879 A like a like Beligians sometimes when they say, like, 0:17:52.200 --> 0:17:56.080 that's the truth, they say sometimes they'll say, like for true, 0:17:56.280 --> 0:17:57.000 that's for true. 0:17:57.760 --> 0:17:59.639 That's what I thought they were doing here for truth, 0:17:59.760 --> 0:18:03.240 you know, the Italians do that. It's not the same thing. 0:18:04.520 --> 0:18:07.920 It's true, it's true, it's the same thing for true. 0:18:08.160 --> 0:18:10.679 For true is different than it's true. It's true as normal, 0:18:11.760 --> 0:18:12.840 it's true proper. 0:18:13.800 --> 0:18:14.280 If he's. 0:18:15.880 --> 0:18:18.040 This thing, go, I'd been trapped in a bed. To 0:18:18.080 --> 0:18:19.399 have to hang out with that guy was giving me 0:18:19.440 --> 0:18:23.720 such anxiety. I will say I loved watching Jake so 0:18:23.880 --> 0:18:29.360 much around Alan because aka Matt in the episode, because 0:18:29.560 --> 0:18:35.000 you could see how much Jake loved it. There's nothing 0:18:35.000 --> 0:18:38.399 more he loved than like a bro he bro browing out, 0:18:39.040 --> 0:18:41.960 you know, and he just he was just soaking in 0:18:42.040 --> 0:18:44.760 how this guy was like playing the character. He was 0:18:44.760 --> 0:18:49.720 so happy to see his happy little Jake. And so 0:18:49.760 --> 0:18:51.879 then basically Jess is just like, she can't do it. 0:18:51.920 --> 0:18:54.520 She's gonna tell the truth, she's gonna own up to it, 0:18:55.040 --> 0:19:01.320 and she's gonna go to his loft, right, and she's 0:19:01.440 --> 0:19:05.639 just gonna say, it's not your micro penis, it's your 0:19:05.880 --> 0:19:13.880 whole personality. Yes, she goes to his art studio and 0:19:13.960 --> 0:19:16.640 she then does her whole big speech on it, which 0:19:16.720 --> 0:19:19.520 kind of breaks him, and then he's vulnerable, and then 0:19:19.520 --> 0:19:22.719 he explains that he has a bad personality though because 0:19:22.840 --> 0:19:27.600 of his insecurities around the micro penis. And then just 0:19:27.680 --> 0:19:32.200 as she starts to then get vulnerable, she then starts 0:19:32.200 --> 0:19:34.760 to show her wonky knee, so she takes her pants. 0:19:34.480 --> 0:19:36.879 Down to show it just so TV. 0:19:37.840 --> 0:19:40.160 It's such a so TV that she takes her pants 0:19:40.160 --> 0:19:42.119 down to show the knee. And then out of that 0:19:42.200 --> 0:19:46.760 super famous John bon Jovi music video what bet of 0:19:46.840 --> 0:19:48.719 Roses I think it was? Or I Will Always Love 0:19:48.760 --> 0:19:51.520 You or one of those not I'll Always love you 0:19:51.680 --> 0:19:52.920 John Bojovi? What's that video? 0:19:53.080 --> 0:19:53.600 Do you remember? 0:19:53.840 --> 0:19:55.920 We're like they're in the big art loft, and then 0:19:55.920 --> 0:19:58.159 the girlfriend sees on the camera that he's cheating. 0:19:58.400 --> 0:20:01.520 What John bonjob he had caught cheating on camera. 0:20:02.480 --> 0:20:05.800 It was a real Shaggy moment, Shaggy, but real ones 0:20:05.960 --> 0:20:06.880 know what I'm talking about. 0:20:07.160 --> 0:20:09.560 Shaggy and bon Jovi did a song together. 0:20:09.920 --> 0:20:11.560 Shaggy Jovi did a. 0:20:11.600 --> 0:20:13.840 Song together with Zoey Chanel was pants down. 0:20:14.119 --> 0:20:18.119 This is the worst game of telephone I've ever played. 0:20:18.119 --> 0:20:21.639 And it's just back John bon Jovi and Shaggy was 0:20:21.680 --> 0:20:26.040 sleeping together. Zoe watched on camera. 0:20:27.080 --> 0:20:31.280 Oh my god, oh my gosh, chat that's right now, 0:20:31.440 --> 0:20:35.160 good old as So she's telling she's telling the truth. 0:20:35.640 --> 0:20:37.760 But and then we cut back to the. 0:20:37.880 --> 0:20:42.280 La Yes, we cut back to the loft. Now Winston 0:20:42.320 --> 0:20:45.600