WEBVTT - Ep. 180 — When You Earn Six Figures and Feel Broke AF 0:00:16.480 --> 0:00:20.040 Hey, hey, hey child. 0:00:20.160 --> 0:00:23.560 Anyway, either way, I'm super happy broadcasting live from the 0:00:23.600 --> 0:00:24.160 new house. 0:00:24.239 --> 0:00:25.000 This is Tiffany. 0:00:25.600 --> 0:00:28.360 Oh happy happy, happy new home. 0:00:31.400 --> 0:00:34.880 I know right, I mean, she's and Rice? Is that 0:00:34.960 --> 0:00:36.400 even how people say it? I love? 0:00:36.440 --> 0:00:37.960 That's what I love saying she's and Rice. 0:00:38.000 --> 0:00:43.720 I wun't say it often enough, But no, it feels 0:00:43.720 --> 0:00:46.000 so good, Like I was saying earlier, You've been like, 0:00:46.080 --> 0:00:48.240 it feels like why I don't even miss that old place. 0:00:48.280 --> 0:00:50.760 I'm like, what old thing? I feel like, you know, 0:00:50.840 --> 0:00:51.760 breaking up with like a. 0:00:51.720 --> 0:00:54.560 Bad boyfriend and I'm like, I totally move on with 0:00:54.600 --> 0:00:56.480 this new guy. And then you guy's amazing. 0:00:57.720 --> 0:01:01.280 You're out the halfway hood exactly. Isn't that crazy? I 0:01:01.320 --> 0:01:03.400 don't live in that halfway good anymore? 0:01:03.600 --> 0:01:05.600 But I am sad for the children that you always 0:01:05.600 --> 0:01:09.280 talk about. Superman provides pizza for and juice boxes. What 0:01:09.280 --> 0:01:09.960 are they gonna do? 0:01:10.480 --> 0:01:10.800 I know? 0:01:10.880 --> 0:01:13.160 But honestly, like whe where he works is right next 0:01:13.160 --> 0:01:14.760 to it. So I was like, I have to go 0:01:14.840 --> 0:01:15.600 visit my babe. 0:01:15.640 --> 0:01:15.959 Minnie. 0:01:16.319 --> 0:01:18.800 She's like the a perpetual four year old. I'm like, Minnie, 0:01:18.800 --> 0:01:19.360 are you four? 0:01:19.520 --> 0:01:21.920 She's like I'm seven. I'm like, Minnie, do you grow. 0:01:22.080 --> 0:01:26.399 She's like no, and so yeah, I do. I am 0:01:26.480 --> 0:01:27.040 going to miss them. 0:01:27.200 --> 0:01:29.240 Actually, I think I am gonna, like, you know, go 0:01:29.280 --> 0:01:32.120 by and visit because that that is the the you know, 0:01:32.200 --> 0:01:34.280 the one sad things that I miss, like all the 0:01:34.440 --> 0:01:36.360 all the little babies around there. 0:01:36.440 --> 0:01:38.680 And and it's cute because my my sister. 0:01:39.080 --> 0:01:41.120 When she drops off her my niece and my nephew 0:01:41.200 --> 0:01:43.520 to just like meet a babysit, they love coming. 0:01:43.560 --> 0:01:45.840 They call it. My nagery name is otto, so they 0:01:45.880 --> 0:01:47.200 call it Auntie Eddo's house. 0:01:47.680 --> 0:01:50.320 They're like, I you know, they know that there's like 0:01:50.320 --> 0:01:52.040 a playground in the back and the kids always have 0:01:52.040 --> 0:01:54.680 a sprinkler going on. So last time she brought them here, 0:01:54.720 --> 0:01:57.120 they were like, where is this place? This is not 0:01:57.360 --> 0:02:00.480 this is not Auntie Eddol's playground. So they were highly 0:02:00.520 --> 0:02:01.800 disappointed at my new house. 0:02:01.920 --> 0:02:04.240 Kids are so suspicious of new locations. 0:02:05.160 --> 0:02:07.800 They were like, this is cute or whatever. Where are 0:02:07.800 --> 0:02:08.240 the kids? 0:02:09.919 --> 0:02:12.160 Yeah, we're hosting a barbecue for the fourth of July. 0:02:12.320 --> 0:02:14.280 And the first thing I've I've learned since all my 0:02:14.320 --> 0:02:17.079 friends have had kids is that keep the kids entertained. 0:02:17.120 --> 0:02:19.040 Like before I bought food or anything else, I was 0:02:19.080 --> 0:02:22.960 like we need a kidie pool. We need some water guns, uh, 0:02:23.080 --> 0:02:24.919 the kind that parents don't have to run and refill 0:02:25.000 --> 0:02:27.320 every five seconds because that drives them crazy. I've seen 0:02:27.320 --> 0:02:32.720 that happen. No fucking bubbles. Excuse me, sorry, that's how 0:02:32.760 --> 0:02:33.960 I feel about bubbles. 0:02:34.280 --> 0:02:35.120 I have seen. 0:02:35.400 --> 0:02:38.360 Yes, it's like, no, there's never a kid not crying 0:02:38.400 --> 0:02:40.960 at the end when you bring out bubbles, because you know, 0:02:41.040 --> 0:02:42.840 we have smaller kids on the we're on the smaller 0:02:42.880 --> 0:02:45.040 side and my friend group and like they want they know, 0:02:45.080 --> 0:02:47.000 they want to hold it themselves, but they're going to 0:02:47.000 --> 0:02:49.000 tip it over. The bubbles are going to be over 0:02:49.080 --> 0:02:52.120 within two minutes. Yeah, and then they're going to be screaming. 0:02:52.480 --> 0:02:55.400 Because they're like I can't unless you get which I 0:02:55.480 --> 0:02:57.200 did get from my my nephew wants. 0:02:57.280 --> 0:02:59.160 It was like a bubble I got offrom like Amazon. 0:02:59.760 --> 0:03:02.880 It's literally like the bubble thing like rotates like a 0:03:02.880 --> 0:03:05.240 windmill and then there's like a little fan behind it. 0:03:05.240 --> 0:03:07.040 It's like you know, like six bucks or something. Yeah, 0:03:07.040 --> 0:03:08.320 and it blows bubbles for you. 0:03:08.360 --> 0:03:09.679 So there's there's that. 0:03:09.800 --> 0:03:12.520 Those are clutch, but they only distract for so long. 0:03:12.639 --> 0:03:14.919 You know. I put them up high and I let 0:03:14.919 --> 0:03:16.320 them go crazy. I don't know what it is about 0:03:16.360 --> 0:03:17.040 kids and dogs. 0:03:17.040 --> 0:03:20.600 They love bubbles, they do, but I decided no bubble 0:03:20.639 --> 0:03:24.080 wars at my party, just water wars and some like 0:03:24.160 --> 0:03:27.920 little yeah kiddy things. So I'm excited for that. We 0:03:28.000 --> 0:03:30.640 had like a we had like what do you call it, 0:03:30.680 --> 0:03:35.560 a stress test this past weekend where Enrique, my husband's mom, 0:03:35.680 --> 0:03:38.040 was supposed to come with a couple of aunties and 0:03:38.080 --> 0:03:40.160 I should have known better. A couple of aunties turned 0:03:40.160 --> 0:03:45.320 into like fifteen sixteen, seventeen eighteen, a couple of hounds entire, yes, 0:03:45.520 --> 0:03:48.600 the entire inwood in the Bronx came to my backyard. 0:03:50.120 --> 0:03:52.840 I was just like, oh, who else is coming? Okay, cool, 0:03:53.120 --> 0:03:55.480 that's great, glad we have enough hamburgers and hot dogs. 0:03:56.480 --> 0:03:59.040 But yeah, it's that's it's summertime. When you got a house, 0:03:59.080 --> 0:03:59.720 what are you going to do? 0:04:00.480 --> 0:04:02.320 I know that was cool because it was I think 0:04:02.360 --> 0:04:03.840 it was like the next day after we moved in, 0:04:04.320 --> 0:04:05.920 it was like my sister came with the kids and 0:04:05.960 --> 0:04:08.080 I was like okay, and then like my. 0:04:08.080 --> 0:04:09.920 Doorball rings, it was like my frand Carol. 0:04:09.920 --> 0:04:12.640 I was like, oh hey, okay, and then like an 0:04:12.680 --> 0:04:14.040 hour after that, Drina came by. 0:04:14.080 --> 0:04:16.040 I was like hey, and then Drina bought her baby. 0:04:16.080 --> 0:04:17.880 Well he's four, but still his baby, and. 0:04:17.800 --> 0:04:20.720 Then Drina's husband came and then our neighbor. It was 0:04:20.760 --> 0:04:24.159 like literally from ten am to ten pm because I 0:04:24.160 --> 0:04:25.880 was like, Oh, I have all these plans this Saturday, 0:04:25.920 --> 0:04:27.000 I'm going to do all the unpacking. 0:04:27.080 --> 0:04:27.680 I did nothing. 0:04:27.920 --> 0:04:30.120 I ended up getting pizza and like I was like, 0:04:30.200 --> 0:04:32.880 oh my gosh, Like but it was so nice because 0:04:32.920 --> 0:04:37.279 we had not had that many people over and like, 0:04:37.320 --> 0:04:38.880 you know, because our apartment was so little, so it 0:04:38.880 --> 0:04:41.120 really couldn't bear like all of those people, you know, 0:04:41.880 --> 0:04:44.200 But so it was just nice. I mean it feels 0:04:44.240 --> 0:04:46.960 like home already, well homish because like we still have 0:04:47.000 --> 0:04:49.440 to get basically everything. We put together our bed that night, 0:04:49.880 --> 0:04:52.479 which was like I actually really love this bed. But 0:04:52.600 --> 0:04:54.640 when you're tired from moving, you're like to get the 0:04:54.680 --> 0:04:56.800 Allen key so you can put up a headboard. 0:04:56.839 --> 0:04:58.200 You're like, oh, just shoot me. 0:04:58.680 --> 0:05:01.599 But I'll never forget the p because when you put 0:05:01.600 --> 0:05:03.479 together a whole house, like did you guys get brand 0:05:03.520 --> 0:05:07.320 new everything? Like just the value yep, the boxes, Tiffany, Yeah, 0:05:07.520 --> 0:05:10.800 the like we our whole backyard was like covered in 0:05:10.839 --> 0:05:13.359 boxes and packaging, and I felt like we had to 0:05:13.440 --> 0:05:17.279 hire a dump like a special junk company to come 0:05:17.400 --> 0:05:21.040 take away our crap because just like the number of packages, 0:05:21.120 --> 0:05:24.599 like it was crazy. My hands, like your hands don't 0:05:24.600 --> 0:05:26.960 feel the same for like a week. From all that, 0:05:27.320 --> 0:05:29.960 it's just untaping and like screwing gas. 0:05:30.040 --> 0:05:32.039 Yeah, and then just using new things. And I was like, okay, 0:05:32.040 --> 0:05:33.599 I've never used this up in before. 0:05:33.360 --> 0:05:35.520 So you know, you don't realize how used to you 0:05:35.520 --> 0:05:37.880 you are to your stuff. So I'm like using the dishwasher, 0:05:38.040 --> 0:05:40.840 like what am I doing wrong? And I'm like, oh, 0:05:40.880 --> 0:05:42.839 I'm like where's the manual? Then I'm like, you know what, 0:05:42.839 --> 0:05:44.919 where's the YouTube video? Because these days, who wants to 0:05:44.920 --> 0:05:47.480 read a manual? So thank god for YouTube. That's like 0:05:47.520 --> 0:05:50.240 a little pro tip that like if you're using your 0:05:50.240 --> 0:05:52.360 appliances and stuff for the first time and you're like, 0:05:52.839 --> 0:05:53.640 like you don't understand. 0:05:53.680 --> 0:05:54.000 I was. 0:05:54.320 --> 0:05:57.400 I was like on the phone with like like on 0:05:57.400 --> 0:05:59.919 on hold, waiting for Best Buy so I could bust 0:06:00.080 --> 0:06:03.960 and be like my hood is not working. And I meanwhile, 0:06:03.960 --> 0:06:06.520 then as I was like waiting, I watched the YouTube video. 0:06:06.520 --> 0:06:08.080 I was like, you pressed the wrong button. I was like, 0:06:08.520 --> 0:06:09.240 let me hang out. 0:06:11.000 --> 0:06:13.320 Yeah, I'm boss. Bless the people who take their time 0:06:13.520 --> 0:06:15.359 to walk you through how to use the knobs on 0:06:15.440 --> 0:06:17.839 all the appliances. I don't know who they are or 0:06:17.839 --> 0:06:19.360 how they make money, but bless them. 0:06:19.680 --> 0:06:23.920 Why not all heroes were capes? Well? What else is 0:06:23.960 --> 0:06:26.039 going on in the world? And pains? 0:06:26.320 --> 0:06:26.599 Oh? 0:06:26.680 --> 0:06:30.400 You know, that's all I got. I'll get to my brow. 0:06:30.839 --> 0:06:32.400 You can just hear that the tone of my voice. 0:06:32.400 --> 0:06:36.160 I'm gonna have a brown break for later. But no, 0:06:36.320 --> 0:06:41.240 things are good. I think summertime is hitting generally the workforce. 0:06:41.240 --> 0:06:43.520 I work with a lot of We have a staff, 0:06:43.520 --> 0:06:46.440 but we also rely on contractors and freelancers a lot. 0:06:46.800 --> 0:06:49.840 And every summer they start to slip and the work 0:06:49.839 --> 0:06:52.040 gets a little bit worse and they stop. This isn't 0:06:52.040 --> 0:06:54.240 my break, but I'm just you know, I have multiple 0:06:54.279 --> 0:06:57.560 breaks today. Yeah, So that's what I've been dealing with, 0:06:57.680 --> 0:06:59.960 is like the free and it's not just at work either, 0:07:00.080 --> 0:07:03.039 freelancers And I understand because your freelancer, your time is 0:07:03.040 --> 0:07:06.000 your own. You know, we're not your boss ultimately, so 0:07:06.160 --> 0:07:08.160 you can start to slip if you want. It's a 0:07:08.160 --> 0:07:10.360 bad way to keep clients, I would say, but it 0:07:10.440 --> 0:07:15.040 happens like clockwork every summer, every Christmas holiday time. But 0:07:15.200 --> 0:07:18.560 I've noticed, like with our dog walkers. I've been using 0:07:18.640 --> 0:07:21.200 the dog walking app Wag. I've talked about it before, 0:07:21.840 --> 0:07:24.360 and I cannot keep a dog walker, like they just 0:07:24.440 --> 0:07:26.800 canceled all the time. Today I had to run home 0:07:26.840 --> 0:07:30.440 because the one dog walker just didn't show up at all. 0:07:30.640 --> 0:07:33.200 And usually they're quick about finding a replacement, like a 0:07:33.240 --> 0:07:36.400 sub but then that one didn't show up. And then 0:07:36.440 --> 0:07:38.400 my poor dog and I was in meetings back to 0:07:38.480 --> 0:07:40.880 back and it wasn't until four o'clock when I was like, 0:07:41.600 --> 0:07:44.640 I haven't gotten my Wag alert, where is Mollie? And 0:07:44.920 --> 0:07:47.280 poor baby was in her room all day? And I 0:07:47.360 --> 0:07:50.800 felt so guilty. And I know, like my friends who 0:07:50.880 --> 0:07:52.480 leave their dogs at home all day are like, what 0:07:52.560 --> 0:07:54.640 stop beating yourself up? Like we leave our dogs at 0:07:54.680 --> 0:07:57.560 home for twelve hours. But I just I just feel 0:07:57.600 --> 0:07:59.040 so bad. You know, I really want to give her 0:07:59.080 --> 0:07:59.920 the life she deserves. 0:08:01.040 --> 0:08:03.360 So it is it like so when you lead them 0:08:03.400 --> 0:08:05.800 home right so they know, like Molly knows not to 0:08:05.800 --> 0:08:06.520 go in the house. 0:08:06.320 --> 0:08:08.360 So she's just holding it. That is that the issue? 0:08:08.520 --> 0:08:11.480 Well, today, of course she pete because she was alone 0:08:11.560 --> 0:08:14.400 for way too long, and she's so used. She's almost 0:08:14.400 --> 0:08:16.080 like a toddler. You know, she's on a schedule. I 0:08:16.160 --> 0:08:20.200 p a two outside, but there was no two pm 0:08:20.280 --> 0:08:22.080 dog walker today. I don't know how long she held it. 0:08:22.120 --> 0:08:24.600 I haven't watched the tapes back, but she I know 0:08:24.680 --> 0:08:26.360 she held it all day and at least she didn't 0:08:26.360 --> 0:08:27.000 go number two. 0:08:27.200 --> 0:08:29.440 It's fine. I just felt so bad. 0:08:29.480 --> 0:08:31.760 I was like, I know you had to go my Okay, 0:08:31.760 --> 0:08:34.079 I'm not gonna do my ca but. 0:08:34.240 --> 0:08:36.560 Mean while moll is like I did go and I'm fine. 0:08:38.040 --> 0:08:39.520 I know she's like, give me a treats. So I 0:08:39.559 --> 0:08:42.080 made sure I gave her the good the good kibbles. 0:08:42.320 --> 0:08:46.679 And you know, I'm just being ridiculous. But you know, 0:08:46.760 --> 0:08:50.040 it's hard even just being a dog parent. It's uh, 0:08:50.400 --> 0:08:52.079 you know, it's hard times. 0:08:52.600 --> 0:08:55.320 Yeah, no, it's yeah. I can't imagine. 0:08:55.320 --> 0:08:57.520 Honestly, I had a cat, but I'm like, I just 0:08:57.559 --> 0:08:59.640 can't imagine, Like I feel like cats are so independent. 0:08:59.679 --> 0:09:02.160 I bear did anything. So I can't even imagine like 0:09:02.240 --> 0:09:04.760 the level of because I see like my friends who 0:09:04.760 --> 0:09:08.040 have dogs. I had my friend Katherine was a cat person. 0:09:08.080 --> 0:09:10.680 She had two cats and then like her sister one 0:09:10.760 --> 0:09:15.240 year gifted her this cute little puppy for her birthday. 0:09:15.280 --> 0:09:17.680 She was like, what, I don't even do dogs now. 0:09:18.440 --> 0:09:20.760 She's like, I'm like, where are your cats? She's like who? 0:09:22.320 --> 0:09:24.680 When I tell you, she's like, she has totally become 0:09:24.679 --> 0:09:27.160 a dog person, and she's like, you know, she still 0:09:27.200 --> 0:09:29.680 loves her cats, obviously, but she's like, like, she is 0:09:29.760 --> 0:09:31.680 such a dog mom. She brings a dog to work 0:09:32.080 --> 0:09:34.120 because she's the CEO of a company, so she brings 0:09:34.160 --> 0:09:34.640 a dog to work. 0:09:34.679 --> 0:09:37.199 Everybody knows the dog. All the pictures are dogs. 0:09:37.200 --> 0:09:39.200 I'm like, when I'm on Instagram, I'm like, you are 0:09:39.200 --> 0:09:41.600 such a neglect for mom. Where are the cat pictures? 0:09:42.040 --> 0:09:43.920 Someone like that The cat is randomly in the background. 0:09:43.920 --> 0:09:45.760 She's like, oh yeah, yeah, there he goes, And then 0:09:45.800 --> 0:09:47.680 the dog with his best thought. 0:09:47.760 --> 0:09:49.840 I'm like, you know what, I. 0:09:50.160 --> 0:09:52.000 Just don't love you like a dog? Does you know? 0:09:53.440 --> 0:09:57.480 I feel I did an interview yesterday with this like 0:09:57.640 --> 0:10:00.360 radio show about this study that we do at Magnet Money. 0:10:00.360 --> 0:10:01.600 I don't usually talk about it, or we do so 0:10:01.640 --> 0:10:03.560 many studies. This was one of my favorite that we do. 0:10:03.600 --> 0:10:06.440 It Magnify, and I figured y'all might find it interesting. 0:10:06.520 --> 0:10:09.200 Since a lot of different media outlets are picking it up. 0:10:09.160 --> 0:10:09.880 But every year. 0:10:10.280 --> 0:10:13.160 A couple of years ago, I was like, anytime you 0:10:13.200 --> 0:10:15.240 do a story, but people who earn six figures, just 0:10:15.240 --> 0:10:18.800 something about six figures just sounds like success, right, I 0:10:18.840 --> 0:10:22.120 want to earn six figures. And I was at a 0:10:22.120 --> 0:10:23.760 point in my life a while back where I was 0:10:23.800 --> 0:10:26.000 earning six figures, and I was like, I don't feel rich. 0:10:26.800 --> 0:10:29.000 This doesn't feel like wealth. I still feel like I'm 0:10:29.040 --> 0:10:33.160 paycheck to paycheck now. Granted, you know, I know people 0:10:33.160 --> 0:10:35.360 who earn you know, less than that, and you know 0:10:35.440 --> 0:10:38.560 are thinking, why are you whining? But in a dual 0:10:38.600 --> 0:10:40.920 income household, it's not that far fetch to say you 0:10:40.960 --> 0:10:43.000 earn six figures. All you need is to people earning 0:10:43.080 --> 0:10:46.280 the minim you know, median household income in America, Yeah, 0:10:46.280 --> 0:10:48.560 which is like fifty or fifty six or six, I 0:10:48.559 --> 0:10:50.839 forget if it's fifty six to sixty thousand or something 0:10:50.880 --> 0:10:54.640 like that. So we started looking at where a family 0:10:54.800 --> 0:10:59.320 of three so two earner household with a preschool age 0:10:59.400 --> 0:11:02.840 child in America, where you can earn six figures and 0:11:02.880 --> 0:11:07.200 still feel like you're not making ends meet. And last 0:11:07.280 --> 0:11:09.480 year we did the study this and I think Washington, 0:11:09.559 --> 0:11:12.640 d C. Was the worst place where you had the 0:11:12.720 --> 0:11:15.080 least money left over in your bank account each month, 0:11:15.920 --> 0:11:18.560 or you were going into debt basically to provide like 0:11:18.800 --> 0:11:23.079 normal basic household needs like daycare and your mortgage and 0:11:23.120 --> 0:11:27.920 all that. This year, Washington, DC is number two. San Jose, 0:11:28.080 --> 0:11:32.760 California is number one. Really yeah, California. I mean it's 0:11:32.760 --> 0:11:34.560 not so surprising because you have a lot of like 0:11:34.960 --> 0:11:38.880 West coast, we have San Francisco, San Jose, but then 0:11:38.920 --> 0:11:41.560 the east coast, New York is number eight, and I 0:11:41.600 --> 0:11:45.360 feel it Minneapolis that was actually surprising to me. Minneapol 0:11:45.679 --> 0:11:48.920 number ten. Yeah, people only have in Minneapolis, a family 0:11:48.920 --> 0:11:50.920 only has about one hundred and fifty bucks left over 0:11:51.760 --> 0:11:56.560 when accounting for all those expenses. Yeah, so Honolulu coming 0:11:56.600 --> 0:12:00.760 in at number six. It's you know, a lot of places, 0:12:01.160 --> 0:12:03.560 and it's not just about the places where there's a 0:12:03.600 --> 0:12:05.840 negative balance left over at the end of the month, 0:12:05.880 --> 0:12:09.240 which was seven out of the metro areas we looked at, 0:12:09.440 --> 0:12:11.200 but it's also just like the places where you have 0:12:11.400 --> 0:12:14.000 one hundred dollars, two hundred dollars, three hundred dollars left 0:12:14.040 --> 0:12:16.160 over in the bank, and you know that's when you 0:12:16.200 --> 0:12:18.800 can feel like I'm doing everything right and there's just 0:12:18.840 --> 0:12:22.680 not anything left over, you know, to invest or to 0:12:22.800 --> 0:12:24.439 save or to save for a house or pay off 0:12:24.440 --> 0:12:25.880 the debt and things like that. 0:12:25.880 --> 0:12:28.560 That's the part that always is so disheartening for me 0:12:28.840 --> 0:12:31.600 is that I see so many people who are doing 0:12:31.640 --> 0:12:35.320 everything right, Like they're you know, they're not buying the latte, 0:12:35.640 --> 0:12:37.679 you know, they're not or. 0:12:37.600 --> 0:12:40.040 The Oto toasts, that's right, Like. 0:12:40.000 --> 0:12:41.880 You know what I mean, They're not splurging, you know, 0:12:42.480 --> 0:12:44.079 I mean, they're not living like you know what I 0:12:44.120 --> 0:12:45.720 call the noodle budget, which is when you just eat 0:12:45.720 --> 0:12:47.800 Gramma noodles. You know, they're not doing that, but you know, 0:12:47.880 --> 0:12:51.000 but they're there, and and still it's really not enough. 0:12:51.000 --> 0:12:52.959 They're like, so how am I supposed to manage and. 0:12:52.920 --> 0:12:55.839 Do all of this? And honestly, I'm like, I don't know. 0:12:56.440 --> 0:12:57.880 That's the part that you. 0:12:57.840 --> 0:13:01.000 Know, honestly like that I was, I was talking, and 0:13:01.040 --> 0:13:04.200 I'm like, at a certain point, like if you're living 0:13:04.240 --> 0:13:06.360 in a place where the dollar like your dollars either, 0:13:06.559 --> 0:13:09.120 you know, we can say things like try to earn 0:13:09.120 --> 0:13:11.600 more money, try to increase your finances, but when you're 0:13:11.600 --> 0:13:13.199 in a place where the cost living is so high 0:13:13.200 --> 0:13:15.800 and it's constantly working against you, and you're not able 0:13:15.840 --> 0:13:18.840 to earn a wage or like an income that makes you, 0:13:18.840 --> 0:13:21.360 you know, feel comfortable. I think by all the time, 0:13:21.480 --> 0:13:23.160 you know, if I weren't earning what I'm already now 0:13:23.200 --> 0:13:25.360 in New York City, I don't know if I could 0:13:25.440 --> 0:13:28.800 have sustained like a comfortable life here. And it's really 0:13:28.880 --> 0:13:32.160 hard to do. Like there's people at my company because 0:13:32.160 --> 0:13:35.160 our headquarters is in Charlotte, North Carolina, people willfully choosing 0:13:35.200 --> 0:13:37.360 to leave New York to move down there because they're like, oh, 0:13:37.360 --> 0:13:41.360 I have a chance to to you know, have you know, 0:13:41.559 --> 0:13:45.920 lower childcare expenses, property taxes, you know those things that 0:13:46.040 --> 0:13:50.040 really eat transportation costs even eat up like that big 0:13:50.120 --> 0:13:53.160 part of your budget. And I see more of my 0:13:53.200 --> 0:13:56.559 friends thinking about leaving New York because of that. How 0:13:56.559 --> 0:13:57.680 can I start a family here? 0:13:58.240 --> 0:14:00.840 Yeah, you're right, Like having a second kid is like 0:14:00.880 --> 0:14:03.040 a or even just one is it seems like a 0:14:03.200 --> 0:14:05.560 like a luxury because you're like, I mean, I don't, 0:14:05.640 --> 0:14:08.000 I honestly as you you know, how like you don't. 0:14:08.000 --> 0:14:09.680 It's not until you get older that you still you 0:14:09.720 --> 0:14:12.679 start to really marvel at your parents because you're like, 0:14:12.800 --> 0:14:16.640 how in the five my gi, I'm like, really, Arondie 0:14:16.640 --> 0:14:22.920 and Sylvia five in New Jersey, I don't, honestly I do. 0:14:23.040 --> 0:14:26.240 And my mom is like she's like everything, like she's like, 0:14:26.280 --> 0:14:28.880 I don't know, like the way my dad even got 0:14:28.880 --> 0:14:30.280 our house, yo. 0:14:30.440 --> 0:14:33.880 One of the things like like I hope to like 0:14:33.920 --> 0:14:35.520 if I could, if I could, if I could pray 0:14:35.560 --> 0:14:37.560 and ask for anything, it would be like the tenacity 0:14:37.640 --> 0:14:40.280 of my father because like like he wanted us. We 0:14:40.360 --> 0:14:42.880 were living in Roselle. I think by then. I don't 0:14:42.920 --> 0:14:44.440 know if Lisa was born here. I think she was, 0:14:44.520 --> 0:14:45.240 but so. 0:14:45.200 --> 0:14:47.360 But he realized, okay, like we were in a. 0:14:47.760 --> 0:14:51.880 Private school, well Catholic school, which wasn't super super expensive, 0:14:52.200 --> 0:14:54.720 but enough to be like, yo, there's too many girls here. 0:14:54.880 --> 0:14:56.080 Somebody something has to give. 0:14:56.480 --> 0:15:00.440 Either we spend the money on school because like in Rosella, 0:15:00.480 --> 0:15:02.440 the public schools weren't that great, or we spend the 0:15:02.440 --> 0:15:04.200 money on taxes. So my dad had done all this 0:15:04.280 --> 0:15:07.200 research on like what you know what New Jersey towns had, 0:15:07.240 --> 0:15:09.680 like the best public school, so he would just pay 0:15:09.720 --> 0:15:14.360 the taxes found Westfield, which taxes are relatively high, but 0:15:14.400 --> 0:15:17.280 the school system is extremely great, but to get our. 0:15:17.200 --> 0:15:19.720 House, they didn't want like hit like what he and 0:15:19.760 --> 0:15:20.320 my mom made. 0:15:20.440 --> 0:15:22.040 My dad's in the count and our mom is a nurse, 0:15:22.280 --> 0:15:25.920 I mean decent money, but they like he couldn't get 0:15:25.960 --> 0:15:28.480 a mortgage anywhere. He finally had to show I don't 0:15:28.480 --> 0:15:30.440 even know what made my dad think they think, think 0:15:30.480 --> 0:15:32.520 of this, but we he was building a house in 0:15:33.480 --> 0:15:36.920 Nigeria and it's a big, beautiful, huge house, and but 0:15:37.040 --> 0:15:39.280 of course it doesn't it's like dwarfs in the like 0:15:39.440 --> 0:15:41.520 for the price of what you could build in Nigeria. 0:15:41.600 --> 0:15:44.360 Somehow he brought the plans and proof that he was 0:15:44.400 --> 0:15:48.160 building the second property to the bank and from there, 0:15:48.280 --> 0:15:50.200 I guess they kind of like were like, oh, well, 0:15:51.120 --> 0:15:52.880 you have more money than we thought. I have to 0:15:52.880 --> 0:15:54.840 ask my dad the exact story, but that's how he 0:15:54.920 --> 0:15:57.000 was able to secure mortgage because he was able to 0:15:57.040 --> 0:15:59.800 kind of prove like, although it seems like we don't 0:15:59.840 --> 0:16:03.280 have a much, look we're building a second home, so 0:16:03.320 --> 0:16:06.440 we do have money. And somehow whatever the mortgage loan 0:16:06.480 --> 0:16:09.280 officer I don't even know the underwriter agreed and we 0:16:09.360 --> 0:16:12.000 got our house in Westfield and now, like what they 0:16:12.000 --> 0:16:14.240 got the house in Westfield for now seems like pennies. 0:16:14.560 --> 0:16:16.480 At the time, he was like all of his friends 0:16:16.480 --> 0:16:20.720 were like, Yo, you're bugging that house is way too expensive. 0:16:20.760 --> 0:16:21.840 How are you going to manage? 0:16:21.960 --> 0:16:25.600 It was two twenty five or two fifty, which like 0:16:25.680 --> 0:16:29.760 for like it's five bedroom, three full back, two kitchens, 0:16:30.640 --> 0:16:32.080 so you know, but back then it. 0:16:32.040 --> 0:16:34.200 Was like they're over over thirty. 0:16:34.240 --> 0:16:36.680 It was about thirty years ago, two fifty or two 0:16:36.680 --> 0:16:38.000 twenty five. That was a lot of money to pay 0:16:38.040 --> 0:16:39.320 for a house. And now, of course the house is 0:16:39.320 --> 0:16:41.360 worth well over like because what sold such a great town, 0:16:41.400 --> 0:16:45.320 it's worth about maybe seven and seven fifty, but just 0:16:45.320 --> 0:16:48.840 a wherewithal to Like sometimes you know, you get a 0:16:48.920 --> 0:16:51.920 know and you have to creatively show that you are 0:16:51.960 --> 0:16:55.400 credit worthy and that my dad just you know, had 0:16:55.400 --> 0:16:57.160 the wherewithal to be like, no, I'm going to show 0:16:57.200 --> 0:16:59.680 them that I am credit worthy because I want my 0:16:59.800 --> 0:17:01.800 kids to grow up and go to a really good 0:17:01.840 --> 0:17:04.320 school system. But I know we cannot afford to send 0:17:04.320 --> 0:17:06.040 them all to private school. 0:17:06.040 --> 0:17:08.200 But yeah, five, I don't know when I. 0:17:08.160 --> 0:17:10.880 Asked them, because like, I mean, it was six figures 0:17:10.920 --> 0:17:14.560 coming into the house, yes, but six figures is paynuts 0:17:14.600 --> 0:17:16.679 with five kids. It wasn't like they weren't making two 0:17:16.760 --> 0:17:19.760 hundred thousand dollars a year collectively. I would say, you know, 0:17:19.960 --> 0:17:22.960 like maybe I don't know, maybe one twenty, I don't 0:17:23.000 --> 0:17:25.480 even know, but definitely not even close to two hundred thousand, 0:17:25.720 --> 0:17:30.159 but five children years two years apart. So like and 0:17:30.240 --> 0:17:32.320 except for the baby, So can you imagine all those 0:17:32.400 --> 0:17:34.440 dag on teenagers hair clothes. 0:17:34.160 --> 0:17:36.680 Thinking about the childcare? Like, because that's when you look 0:17:36.720 --> 0:17:40.880 at our study. Like, let's take, for example, what's number one, 0:17:40.960 --> 0:17:45.919 I said, San Jose, California. The mortgage payment in San Jose, Uh, 0:17:46.119 --> 0:17:47.880 oh crap, where is it at? It's about twenty seven 0:17:48.000 --> 0:17:51.760 hundred dollars. Childcare is about half that at thirteen hundred 0:17:51.800 --> 0:17:55.800