WEBVTT - Let’s Get Down to Business with Vanessa Gonzalez 0:00:00.280 --> 0:00:09.480 Hi, everybody, Good afternoon, It's Thursday. Hello, Hi Chelsea. You've 0:00:09.520 --> 0:00:11.600 had a big week this week I did. I made 0:00:11.600 --> 0:00:15.280 an announcement that Joe Koy and I are no longer together. 0:00:15.640 --> 0:00:19.440 So I announced that on my Instagram page, as one does. 0:00:19.880 --> 0:00:23.880 I figured since we have been such a public couple, 0:00:24.040 --> 0:00:29.720 that it was only appropriate to publicly break break up 0:00:30.280 --> 0:00:34.760 um or let everybody know, because people were so invested 0:00:34.800 --> 0:00:37.839 in our relationship and so supportive, which was so moving 0:00:37.880 --> 0:00:42.640 to me, and it was really heartfelt to always hear 0:00:43.320 --> 0:00:47.480 how you know, everybody loved it and was so inspired 0:00:48.360 --> 0:00:52.120 and how I just wanted to let everyone know that 0:00:52.200 --> 0:00:56.120 it is, you know, an ending, but it's a beginning 0:00:56.280 --> 0:00:59.920 and it's not something that is going to break either 0:01:00.040 --> 0:01:03.640 one of us, and that I have more hope than 0:01:03.680 --> 0:01:07.959 I ever have about love and finding love, and I 0:01:08.120 --> 0:01:10.600 now know that it's possible in the least in the 0:01:10.600 --> 0:01:13.920 places you least expect it. I believe that I believe 0:01:14.000 --> 0:01:17.399 that for everyone, for me and for everyone else, and 0:01:17.440 --> 0:01:20.440 that my heart is open and it's not going to shut. 0:01:20.600 --> 0:01:23.920 You know, it's now I'm open to the idea of 0:01:24.000 --> 0:01:26.320 spending my life with someone, and I hadn't been for 0:01:26.360 --> 0:01:32.080 a really long time. Your post was so beautiful, and 0:01:32.720 --> 0:01:34.880 you know, I can tell that you both learned so 0:01:34.959 --> 0:01:37.360 much from each other, and I think that's really all 0:01:37.360 --> 0:01:41.240 we can ask from a relationship, is like not necessarily 0:01:41.319 --> 0:01:44.200 till death do us part, but like what how did 0:01:44.200 --> 0:01:48.040 you become more yourself? And how what did you learn 0:01:48.080 --> 0:01:50.560 about yourself when you were in that relationship for the 0:01:50.600 --> 0:01:52.920 good parts of yourself and the bad parts of yourself? 0:01:53.200 --> 0:01:55.840 And you two are wonderful together. And I know, you 0:01:55.880 --> 0:01:59.280 know you said you'll you'll still be friends and yeah, yeah, 0:01:59.440 --> 0:02:01.520 you know. I mean it's hard to go through a 0:02:01.520 --> 0:02:04.280 breakup obviously, but it's important to go through it and 0:02:04.360 --> 0:02:07.440 not avoid it and not distract and deflect. And like 0:02:07.520 --> 0:02:10.440 I I'm very against that. I'm very much about sitting 0:02:10.480 --> 0:02:14.160 in my pain and understanding that something you know, that 0:02:14.240 --> 0:02:16.920 I hoped was going to work out did not work out. 0:02:17.480 --> 0:02:20.120 And he changed me in so many wonderful ways. You know, 0:02:20.280 --> 0:02:23.880 he really fired up my work effic again and my 0:02:23.960 --> 0:02:27.320 ambition again, and I my desire to do things and 0:02:27.440 --> 0:02:31.400 be productive and have a voice and use my voice 0:02:31.400 --> 0:02:33.000 instead of you know, there's so many times where I 0:02:33.000 --> 0:02:35.720 fantasize about like moving to my worka well, mostly because 0:02:35.720 --> 0:02:37.920 this country is going to hell in a handbasket or 0:02:38.080 --> 0:02:41.800 moving it Canada and all the stuff. And and I think, 0:02:41.880 --> 0:02:44.520 you know, Joe was a like a big beacon of 0:02:44.600 --> 0:02:48.720 light in my life that I he's unforgettable, and I 0:02:48.760 --> 0:02:50.840 like will take a lot of that with me into 0:02:50.880 --> 0:02:55.000 my next phase of life. And I just I don't 0:02:55.000 --> 0:02:59.200 want people to be heartbroken like on our behalf. Like 0:02:59.760 --> 0:03:02.680 it's a beautiful thing to be loved like that, you know, 0:03:02.840 --> 0:03:06.640 and to love someone like that, it's really beautiful. And 0:03:06.800 --> 0:03:09.280 I'll never let go of that because I know that 0:03:09.320 --> 0:03:12.760 it's out there now and it's possible, and I want 0:03:12.760 --> 0:03:16.800 everyone else to know that it's possible too. And the 0:03:16.840 --> 0:03:21.160 only work you can do is on yourself, and you know, 0:03:21.480 --> 0:03:24.760 and and get through it and understand that you know, 0:03:25.120 --> 0:03:28.119 nothing in life is really that permanent. And I did 0:03:28.160 --> 0:03:33.000 my best and and that wasn't enough. Yeah, And like 0:03:33.040 --> 0:03:36.160 they say, when you're going through something, keep going. That's 0:03:36.160 --> 0:03:39.400 such a shift from where you were several years ago, 0:03:39.480 --> 0:03:42.240 where you're I mean, just look at how you're experiencing 0:03:42.240 --> 0:03:45.600 this loss. Like you are experiencing it. You're not closing 0:03:45.600 --> 0:03:48.160 your mind to it, and like that's done. That's over. 0:03:48.240 --> 0:03:50.000 I'm not going to think about it anymore. Like you 0:03:50.120 --> 0:03:52.560 said so many times on this show, how you know 0:03:52.560 --> 0:03:55.480 when a relationship, friendship, or otherwise was over, it was 0:03:55.520 --> 0:03:57.640 just like that doors closed. I don't even think about 0:03:57.640 --> 0:04:01.960 them anymore. And what I can't imagine a healthier way 0:04:02.000 --> 0:04:05.280 to be processing this than you are right now. Thank you, 0:04:05.440 --> 0:04:08.880 thank you. I'm definitely this is my first adult breakup, 0:04:10.000 --> 0:04:12.880 even though it's public. It's like I've handled this with 0:04:12.960 --> 0:04:16.120 as much adult technique and skill as I've been taught 0:04:16.160 --> 0:04:20.040 through therapy. Thank you, Dan's eagel Um. You know, like 0:04:20.200 --> 0:04:22.760 I know that I've acted with dignity and with grace, 0:04:22.960 --> 0:04:26.480 and I am giving nothing but love, putting love out 0:04:26.480 --> 0:04:29.920 there because I know that he needs that and everyone 0:04:30.000 --> 0:04:32.680 needs it and I need it, and I now know 0:04:32.880 --> 0:04:35.479 that that's the way to break up with love, not 0:04:35.600 --> 0:04:40.480 with anger. Yeah, thank you so much for sharing that. 0:04:40.520 --> 0:04:42.640 I know any time you go through a breakup it's 0:04:42.680 --> 0:04:46.600 incredibly hard, and it's really rave of you to share 0:04:46.600 --> 0:04:49.960 all of that. I think I speak for all of 0:04:50.080 --> 0:04:52.599 the listeners out there when I say we're rooting for 0:04:52.640 --> 0:04:55.560 you both, and I really can't wait to see what 0:04:55.640 --> 0:04:59.360 the next chapter is thank you, Thank You. So as 0:04:59.400 --> 0:05:02.120 we transition into our episode, how would you feel if 0:05:02.120 --> 0:05:05.359 I tell you about something totally ridiculous that happened to 0:05:05.400 --> 0:05:08.040 me this week. Yeah, let's do a light thing. A 0:05:08.160 --> 0:05:13.440 light thing. So I just got back from Wisconsin. I 0:05:13.480 --> 0:05:15.680 was there for a memorial, but it's for an aunt 0:05:15.680 --> 0:05:17.960 who passed away several years ago. She was one of 0:05:17.960 --> 0:05:21.599 our favorite aunts. But it was really wonderful to be 0:05:21.640 --> 0:05:25.720 with all my like my favorite cousins, like the like yes, 0:05:25.880 --> 0:05:28.360 the fun cousins. Yeah. I have a line in one 0:05:28.360 --> 0:05:30.320 of my books where I say, like, sisters are great, 0:05:30.400 --> 0:05:33.039 but like your cousin will help you, like order vodka 0:05:33.120 --> 0:05:37.080 in an omelet, you know, like your sisters are slightly protective, 0:05:37.080 --> 0:05:39.640 whereas cousins are down for the same party you were down. 0:05:40.640 --> 0:05:43.440 And uh, yeah, I love I love cousins. I have 0:05:43.560 --> 0:05:46.560 so many cousins too. It's nice that you went back 0:05:46.600 --> 0:05:48.400 for a memorial. That's a really nice way to honor 0:05:48.440 --> 0:05:51.480 your out. Yeah. She um. Well, my aunts and uncles 0:05:51.520 --> 0:05:54.159 had had a cabin up in like the north woods 0:05:54.160 --> 0:05:58.160 of Wisconsin. Manito wish Waters. If we have any listeners there, 0:05:58.279 --> 0:05:59.640 and I used to go up there with them but 0:05:59.720 --> 0:06:01.640 this an aunt. She had a phaseema and so it 0:06:01.680 --> 0:06:03.640 was always easier for her to be up there, especially 0:06:03.720 --> 0:06:06.280 during the summers, and loved it up there, so she 0:06:06.320 --> 0:06:09.080 asked for her ashes to be spread there and we 0:06:09.240 --> 0:06:12.960 finally all got it together and we're you know, we 0:06:12.960 --> 0:06:15.320 we went up and it was just a beautiful time. 0:06:15.480 --> 0:06:19.240 The side of the family. My uncle is Nigerian and 0:06:19.279 --> 0:06:22.200 so we all just like are loud and eat spicy 0:06:22.279 --> 0:06:24.800 food together and we just like try to make each 0:06:24.800 --> 0:06:27.599 other scream laugh as loud as possible. It is the 0:06:27.680 --> 0:06:33.160 most fun. It's just that that means everyone's in the 0:06:33.240 --> 0:06:36.040 right age range. Yes, yeah, we're all kind of like 0:06:36.080 --> 0:06:39.680 we grew up together nearby each other and also kind 0:06:39.680 --> 0:06:42.440 of have kind of similar age ranges as well. Cut 0:06:42.680 --> 0:06:45.359 cut love that. But so we're up in the northwest 0:06:45.360 --> 0:06:48.240 of Wisconsin. The place we stayed at, I think has 0:06:48.279 --> 0:06:51.799 not been touched since like the Seven Days, Like green 0:06:52.160 --> 0:06:56.080 carpet on all the floors, there's like animal heads on 0:06:56.279 --> 0:07:00.200 all the walls, a beautiful area on the lake. So 0:07:00.279 --> 0:07:02.640 we had a great time. But we stayed in this 0:07:02.680 --> 0:07:05.440 lodge that was like built in nine and it definitely 0:07:05.600 --> 0:07:07.960 looked and felt it. But we had a great time together, 0:07:08.640 --> 0:07:11.640 all drinking out on the porch and getting bitten by 0:07:11.680 --> 0:07:14.480 mosquitoes and that sort of thing people talk about, like 0:07:14.880 --> 0:07:19.120 when I loved when visits them and it's like they 0:07:19.160 --> 0:07:21.480 see a bird and it reminds me, reminds them of 0:07:21.520 --> 0:07:24.240 their mother, or you know, a butterfly and it reminds 0:07:24.280 --> 0:07:27.920 them of their grandfather or or whatever. And so we 0:07:27.920 --> 0:07:30.720 went to this really special place on a lake, and 0:07:30.760 --> 0:07:33.080 I kept thinking, like, I wonder if Dad is going 0:07:33.120 --> 0:07:35.800 to visit us. You know, we had some tears, we 0:07:35.880 --> 0:07:41.320 had some laughs. We really remembered her, and so sweet 0:07:41.360 --> 0:07:44.080 it was. It was really beautiful. We were up on 0:07:44.640 --> 0:07:48.880 the honor, like to honor someone like that is so honorable. Yeah, 0:07:48.960 --> 0:07:50.560 I'm just thinking of different ways I can use the 0:07:50.560 --> 0:07:57.440 word honor, honorary. So, you know, we decided would all 0:07:57.440 --> 0:07:59.960 take a picture of this beautiful lake that she loved. 0:08:00.680 --> 0:08:03.240 And so there was a small dock there because it 0:08:03.240 --> 0:08:05.160 was sort of a boat launch, and several of my 0:08:05.240 --> 0:08:07.400 cousins and I we went out on the dock and 0:08:07.560 --> 0:08:09.440 it was a little rickety, but you know, I didn't 0:08:09.480 --> 0:08:11.640 think too much of it. So we got there, we 0:08:11.720 --> 0:08:13.640 take a few pictures, and we decided, well, let's get 0:08:13.680 --> 0:08:17.160 everybody up on this dock and take a beautiful picture 0:08:17.320 --> 0:08:20.920 with this vista. Well, everybody gets on the dock. My 0:08:21.120 --> 0:08:23.440 nephew sort of says, oh, hey, like is this going 0:08:23.480 --> 0:08:25.400 to be safe for us all because it's a little bendy. 0:08:25.800 --> 0:08:28.160 My sisters like it's got bolts and stuff. It's fine, 0:08:28.680 --> 0:08:31.640 we'll get up there. Brad. My husband is setting up 0:08:31.680 --> 0:08:34.680 the picture on the shore. All of a sudden, somebody 0:08:35.760 --> 0:08:43.240 it's moving. It's moving and this hole water, Oh my god, 0:08:43.400 --> 0:08:49.199 I love it was the most ridiculous things, like my like, 0:08:49.320 --> 0:08:51.920 everyone is fine, like no one was hurt at all, 0:08:52.040 --> 0:08:54.040 but like there was a moment where like my my 0:08:54.160 --> 0:08:56.960 nephew's leg got kind of like trapped in one of 0:08:56.960 --> 0:09:00.040 the boards, and so we all like bailed off. I 0:09:00.160 --> 0:09:03.000 bailed off the side in the most inelegant way possible, 0:09:03.600 --> 0:09:06.040 out wet up to my collar bones in one foot 0:09:06.040 --> 0:09:11.080 of water somehow, like soaking wet. Anyway, everyone was totally fine, 0:09:11.160 --> 0:09:12.840 no one was hurt, And I was like, that was 0:09:12.880 --> 0:09:16.679 how I done. Showed up exactly like enough of this crying. 0:09:17.280 --> 0:09:19.640 So everyone was in the water. Everyone was in the water, 0:09:19.920 --> 0:09:23.000 like we were sopping wet and sorry, pepos, like you 0:09:23.040 --> 0:09:26.400 needed a new talk. Okay, I haven't water falling in 0:09:26.480 --> 0:09:29.040 the story as well from this weekend. So I was 0:09:29.080 --> 0:09:31.880 with my cousins also up in Malibu or Topanga. We 0:09:32.000 --> 0:09:34.040 had like a cook out on the beach and I 0:09:34.120 --> 0:09:36.520 had some friends and all my cousins were there, and 0:09:36.559 --> 0:09:39.319 then my two little cousins, Ella and Gray, who are 0:09:39.320 --> 0:09:44.120 my cousins, babies, babies, they're eleven, and their teams so whatever, Well, 0:09:44.160 --> 0:09:47.360 that's not okay. I was on pylons, you know, the 0:09:47.360 --> 0:09:51.280 pylons go into the water. I was obviously intoxicated, and 0:09:51.360 --> 0:09:55.439 I was taking Ella as her guardian across the pylons 0:09:55.440 --> 0:09:57.760 and she was like, you know, we're walking and it 0:09:57.840 --> 0:10:00.160 was the waves were crashing and coming in, and I 0:10:00.200 --> 0:10:02.160 was like okay. I'm like, oh, it's fine. I'm so 0:10:02.240 --> 0:10:05.640 good with balance, you know. I And I'm walking along, 0:10:05.800 --> 0:10:08.040 walking along, and then she's like, oh, I'm getting scared. 0:10:08.040 --> 0:10:10.040 I'm getting scared. I go, okay, let's sit down. So 0:10:10.080 --> 0:10:11.840 I go to sit down, and as I sit down, 0:10:11.880 --> 0:10:15.320 I lose my balance and just sucking dive right into 0:10:15.360 --> 0:10:18.600 the sand head first into that The water was crushing, 0:10:18.800 --> 0:10:20.720 but the sand was not you know. It wasn't high. 0:10:21.200 --> 0:10:26.080 So I faced first into white shirt, my nipples completely exposed. 0:10:26.600 --> 0:10:29.719 I was in jeans, completely soaked, and I look up 0:10:29.760 --> 0:10:32.160 at my niece or she's my cousin, but she feels 0:10:32.160 --> 0:10:34.040 like my niece. And I look up with my cousin 0:10:34.080 --> 0:10:36.400 and she's like, I didn't do that. I didn't push you. 0:10:37.040 --> 0:10:39.200 I was like, no, I know you didn't. I was like, 0:10:39.280 --> 0:10:41.839 I'm drunk, and I'm like, I'm a fucking drunk. I'm 0:10:41.840 --> 0:10:44.840 now I'm a drunk ant, Like I'm a drunk elderly 0:10:45.160 --> 0:10:48.440 at walking around the pons to my whole family and 0:10:48.640 --> 0:10:51.360 all they all look and go, put a fucking shirt 0:10:51.440 --> 0:10:55.280 over your nipples, like like what happened? I was like, oh, 0:10:57.559 --> 0:11:01.359 buying the pylons. It was really humiliating, but totally classically. 0:11:01.679 --> 0:11:05.240 But yeah, to water incidents, we should focus on water 0:11:05.360 --> 0:11:09.760 excursions for this episode. We have a one of my 0:11:09.800 --> 0:11:12.520 favorite peoples here today. She's the opener on my Vaccinated 0:11:12.559 --> 0:11:14.320 in Horny tour. And if you haven't seen me on 0:11:14.360 --> 0:11:17.360 my Vaccinated in Horny Tour, I am coming to the 0:11:17.440 --> 0:11:21.440 Justicer Laps Montcho Comedy Festival July. I am coming to 0:11:21.800 --> 0:11:26.760 Vancouver August twelve and Calgary August and August four. So 0:11:26.760 --> 0:11:28.640 I have two shows in Vancouver on the twelfth, and 0:11:28.640 --> 0:11:30.800 then the two shows in Calgary, and then after that 0:11:30.880 --> 0:11:33.000 I have a whole new slew of dates starting in 0:11:33.320 --> 0:11:36.959 Saratoga in October. I'm coming to all parts of Florida, 0:11:37.120 --> 0:11:40.920 so you're welcome. Tampa, Tampa, Tampa. I have two shows 0:11:40.920 --> 0:11:46.040 in Tampa and then a bunch of other places. Colorado Springs, Colorado. 0:11:46.840 --> 0:11:54.440 Just go to Chelsea Hamlet. Let me introduce my opener. 0:11:54.520 --> 0:11:56.400 She opens for me on the road from my Vaccinated 0:11:56.400 --> 0:12:01.880 in Horny tour. She is fucking hilarious. She resides in Austin, Texas. 0:12:02.000 --> 0:12:08.560 Please welcome Vanessa Gonzalez. Hi Vanessa. Hello. Oh hello, you 0:12:08.640 --> 0:12:12.079 look like you're about to start a job interview. Oh yes, 0:12:12.240 --> 0:12:16.040 I hope I get the job. You guys, this is 0:12:16.160 --> 0:12:18.640 Vanessa Gonzalez. Have you met Vanessa yet. We talked on 0:12:18.679 --> 0:12:22.120 the phone and she's a delight. Well you probably saw 0:12:22.120 --> 0:12:24.800 her open for me at the war I did. It 0:12:24.880 --> 0:12:28.719 was so much fun. Yeah, those were great show. We've 0:12:28.760 --> 0:12:31.280 been having a lot of great shows. Vanessa has been 0:12:31.280 --> 0:12:33.240 on the road with me for the most part, for 0:12:33.360 --> 0:12:35.839 most of my Vaccinated in Horny tour. Every once in 0:12:35.880 --> 0:12:38.360 a while we have to replace her because of her attitude, 0:12:38.960 --> 0:12:41.560 or she has an improper sexual relationship with one of 0:12:41.600 --> 0:12:44.240 our representatives from Live Nation, So that's been a big 0:12:44.559 --> 0:12:46.920 thorn in our side because she doesn't understand the moment 0:12:46.920 --> 0:12:50.599 we're living in. And he reported her because he's a 0:12:50.640 --> 0:12:52.839 white male and he was being sexually harassed by her. 0:12:53.720 --> 0:12:58.320 You know, it's hard to navigate the entertainment business. His 0:12:58.400 --> 0:13:01.880 name is Brandon book Are in case anyone needs to 0:13:01.960 --> 0:13:04.880 look him up. We have a guy that runs our 0:13:04.920 --> 0:13:07.400 tour for us, and I say run in very loose 0:13:07.559 --> 0:13:12.559 terms because because he's not running fucking anything, and there 0:13:12.640 --> 0:13:15.679 are more mistakes than there are victory laps. But he 0:13:15.760 --> 0:13:18.800 loves the greatest thing about Brandon is well a, we 0:13:18.880 --> 0:13:21.600 love Brandon, but he's such a good sport about us 0:13:21.800 --> 0:13:25.200 making so much fun of him because he is just 0:13:25.320 --> 0:13:27.240 kind of a middle aged white guy and he thinks 0:13:27.240 --> 0:13:29.840 he's with it and he's not with it. He spelled 0:13:29.880 --> 0:13:33.600 Vanessa's last name wrong for the better part of six 0:13:33.640 --> 0:13:40.240 months so excellently. It's pretty common. Yeah, he's figuring it out. 0:13:40.559 --> 0:13:43.640 It's it's hard, it's hard. His job is hard. Yeah, 0:13:44.200 --> 0:13:46.319 for him, it is right, Okay. I would like to 0:13:46.360 --> 0:13:49.720 also mention that Vanessa was recently named one of Variety's 0:13:49.760 --> 0:13:54.240 top ten comics to watch out for, So big congratulations 0:13:54.240 --> 0:13:58.199 on that, Vanessa well deserved. Oh, thank you so much. Yeah, 0:13:58.240 --> 0:14:01.520 that's it's been wild. It's been a wild ride this year. 0:14:02.000 --> 0:14:04.880 So fun. So Vanessa is based out of Austin, and 0:14:05.280 --> 0:14:08.040 I found her through the woman who runs my production 0:14:08.080 --> 0:14:10.560 company named Jackie Sosa. She knew of Vanessa and I 0:14:10.600 --> 0:14:12.640 was looking for women to open from me, and so 0:14:12.720 --> 0:14:15.640 she sent me Vanessa's info and then I started stalking 0:14:15.679 --> 0:14:19.400 her online and she and then we've had some pretty 0:14:19.440 --> 0:14:23.680 exciting times. We've had some long journeys. Do you know 0:14:23.720 --> 0:14:26.440 how much that live word journey we've had. We have 0:14:26.520 --> 0:14:29.400 different modes of operative transportation at all times. Sometimes we 0:14:29.440 --> 0:14:31.920 take a scooter bus. Sometimes we take a what are 0:14:31.920 --> 0:14:38.880 they called vans or no. Sometimes I'm like, these spreater 0:14:38.920 --> 0:14:41.240 vans could be really nice. Actually they have, they have 0:14:41.360 --> 0:14:43.640 when they have a configuration, I'm like, oh, this is nice. 0:14:43.840 --> 0:14:46.320 So we've taken a tour bus, we've taken planes, we've 0:14:46.360 --> 0:14:49.400 taken commercial plans, we've taken private planes. We've taken helicopter. 0:14:49.520 --> 0:14:52.680 Oh no, we haven't taken a helicopter. Well, you missed out. 0:14:52.680 --> 0:14:54.480 We took a helicopter last week in the the New York 0:14:54.480 --> 0:14:57.200 City and Rosebud almost climax, although I did too. I 0:14:57.240 --> 0:15:00.040 gotta say, you guys, that helicopter ride, flying it in 0:15:00.040 --> 0:15:02.280 New York City at night. Manhattan we got back at 0:15:02.320 --> 0:15:07.200 like you know, midnight at moon was this beautiful orange 0:15:07.280 --> 0:15:10.400 birth and we were just driving. Flying into that city 0:15:10.560 --> 0:15:12.600 is like one of the most spectacular things ever. It's 0:15:12.640 --> 0:15:15.880 like flying into Paris, Yeah, because it's so low enough 0:15:15.920 --> 0:15:17.960 that you could see all the streets in the movement 0:15:18.000 --> 0:15:20.119 and what's going on. You know, when all the avenues 0:15:20.240 --> 0:15:22.480 and the city lit up at night with the moon 0:15:22.680 --> 0:15:25.320 was just so beautiful. We were all just like, oh, 0:15:25.360 --> 0:15:29.760 that's cool. I'd be too scared. Yeah, I think so 0:15:29.840 --> 0:15:32.720 too about a helicopter. I don't know. I guess who 0:15:32.760 --> 0:15:38.280 was scared, Vanessa Brandon, that's right, Brandon scared me. And 0:15:38.320 --> 0:15:42.840 Brandon gets scared of the planes and flying things. Yea, 0:15:43.080 --> 0:15:48.360 the heights. So Vanessa is from a family of three. 0:15:48.640 --> 0:15:52.600 She has two brothers, right, and she has a boyfriend 0:15:52.640 --> 0:15:58.000 who's adorable and Yeah, his name is Daniel and she's 0:15:58.080 --> 0:16:00.640 based out of Austin. So tell us a little bit 0:16:00.680 --> 0:16:02.840 about because you were in l A and then you 0:16:02.880 --> 0:16:05.080 moved to Austin during the pandemic, and what's it been 0:16:05.120 --> 0:16:09.360 like to be in Austin during this time. It's different now. 0:16:09.440 --> 0:16:12.520 I feel like Austin is very much many l A 0:16:12.680 --> 0:16:19.080 now and it's changed. I know, I know, it's huge. 0:16:19.160 --> 0:16:23.120 People are moving here to do comedy now. It changed 0:16:23.160 --> 0:16:28.720 so much like I was in l A. And just 0:16:28.800 --> 0:16:33.480 in those two years, Austin changed. And during the pandemic 0:16:33.520 --> 0:16:36.160 when there was a pandemic, there was no pandemic really 0:16:36.200 --> 0:16:42.480 in Texas, so shows kept going, theaters were closing opening, 0:16:42.560 --> 0:16:46.680 clubs were closing opening, And yeah, it's like the scene 0:16:46.720 --> 0:16:50.280 got bigger during a pandemic somehow. Yeah. I know a 0:16:50.320 --> 0:16:53.040 lot of people that moved either to Nashville or to Austin. 0:16:53.200 --> 0:16:56.320 Like half of l A went just mostly to avoid taxes, right, 0:16:56.440 --> 0:17:00.240 isn't that then everyone's primary goal? Yeah, we don't pay 0:17:00.280 --> 0:17:07.359 taxes here, just like I don't pay. But how do 0:17:07.400 --> 0:17:09.119 you I want you to talk a little bit about, 0:17:09.160 --> 0:17:11.760 like do you also just got voted Austin's number one 0:17:11.800 --> 0:17:15.880 Comedian of the Year didn't do yeah, which is great 0:17:15.920 --> 0:17:18.919 for this burgeoning comedy mecca. You know, this is becoming 0:17:18.960 --> 0:17:21.119 like the new comedy place next to l A or 0:17:21.160 --> 0:17:23.240 New York. Well, New York is probably number one, right, 0:17:23.480 --> 0:17:27.600 I don't know what's the number one? Yeah, probably, but yeah, 0:17:27.680 --> 0:17:31.280 I was voted through the Austin Chronicle. That caught me 0:17:31.320 --> 0:17:35.080 off guard. I didn't even know people knew that I, 0:17:35.200 --> 0:17:37.760 you know, was back here, but they know I have stalkers, 0:17:38.520 --> 0:17:43.400 and um, yeah, it's that. That was really special because 0:17:43.440 --> 0:17:45.520 you know, going to l A and making that jump 0:17:45.840 --> 0:17:48.800 and then coming back and it was hard. It's been 0:17:48.880 --> 0:17:52.280 hard to kind of navigate, like, am I, you know, 0:17:52.600 --> 0:17:55.920 still in the business, staying connected and all that after 0:17:56.000 --> 0:17:58.680 making such a big move and coming back home. So 0:17:58.760 --> 0:18:03.600 it's a mental lot that even moving back stuff still yeah, stuff, 0:18:03.640 --> 0:18:06.359 I'm still happening for you. And she also has she 0:18:06.440 --> 0:18:08.840 has her own rider at the shows because I, I 0:18:09.040 --> 0:18:11.879 told Brandon, the person we're talking about, you know, I 0:18:11.920 --> 0:18:13.840 have a rider in mine, which is basically like a 0:18:13.920 --> 0:18:17.200 cheese board, and somehow a charcuterie board got on there too. 0:18:17.240 --> 0:18:19.760 But I don't really eat that much meat anymore, so 0:18:19.840 --> 0:18:22.120 I told him to exnate the charcouder board and then 0:18:22.119 --> 0:18:24.320 he just put it in Vanessa's room. So now she 0:18:24.440 --> 0:18:27.200 gets a charcuterie board. So this past weekend, the last 0:18:27.200 --> 0:18:31.000 weekend when we had Rosebud, Vanessa Rosebud's like, holy sh it, 0:18:31.040 --> 0:18:34.120 I can't believe you got a charcuterie board. Every single night, 0:18:34.520 --> 0:18:36.399 She's like, I've got to put that in my rider. 0:18:36.440 --> 0:18:38.880 I'm like, listen, bit, if you can take this charcudrii 0:18:38.960 --> 0:18:41.080 board and stretch it out for over the next two years, 0:18:41.119 --> 0:18:43.639 because that's how long it will last. What a waste 0:18:43.680 --> 0:18:46.679 of meat. I know they're huge, I know, but Vanessa 0:18:46.760 --> 0:18:48.760 likes her snack packs. She likes to travel with a 0:18:48.760 --> 0:18:50.920 little like like you know those ladies at Dodger Stadium 0:18:50.920 --> 0:18:53.399 that come up with little trays of candy. That's how 0:18:53.480 --> 0:18:56.119 Vanessa leaves every theater. She takes her tray what's in 0:18:56.200 --> 0:18:58.640 her green room and sometimes what's in my green room, 0:18:58.800 --> 0:19:01.159 and then we get on our little transportation bus and 0:19:01.160 --> 0:19:04.000 depending on how long the ride is and how high 0:19:04.200 --> 0:19:07.240 I am at that point, we also share edibles because 0:19:07.560 --> 0:19:12.359 Vanessa has motion sickness. I don't know, but anyway, for her, Yeah, 0:19:12.400 --> 0:19:15.919 for me, they always come in handy. When we're super 0:19:16.000 --> 0:19:19.600 high after the show, there's no food, it's like, yeah, 0:19:19.760 --> 0:19:23.879 just have three packs of chips, right, just have that? 0:19:24.000 --> 0:19:27.480 And if I asked her four chips, she will sometimes 0:19:27.480 --> 0:19:30.440 be annoyed with me. She will sometimes saying how many 0:19:30.480 --> 0:19:32.840 are you going to have? And I mean, this is 0:19:32.880 --> 0:19:35.199 the second bag and are you going to reimburse me 0:19:35.280 --> 0:19:39.280 for days? So she's pretty tough stuff to deal with. Well, 0:19:39.320 --> 0:19:42.440 because you're you're shipping on my snack bag the whole time, 0:19:42.680 --> 0:19:44.639 I know, and you're like, well, let me let me 0:19:44.680 --> 0:19:47.639 see what you got. Yeah, and then I'm a hypocrite. 0:19:47.760 --> 0:19:49.879 What's been your one some of your favorite places to 0:19:49.920 --> 0:19:51.960 go on tour, like would have been the most surprising 0:19:51.960 --> 0:19:55.720 cities or your favorites? Well, I we had so much 0:19:55.760 --> 0:19:59.840 fun in Kansas City. Those were great shows, and just 0:20:00.000 --> 0:20:01.800 the fact that we were there for two nights, which 0:20:01.840 --> 0:20:05.360 is rare, we got to like really have fun and 0:20:05.359 --> 0:20:08.320 and yeah, it's the back to back shows is hard, 0:20:08.400 --> 0:20:13.200 but those are fun. Nashville was a blast. Yeah, Nashville 0:20:13.280 --> 0:20:16.679 was fun. Kansas City was fun because also we we 0:20:16.720 --> 0:20:18.680 stayed in the same hotel for two nights. Like she said, 0:20:18.680 --> 0:20:21.879 which is always just such a nice break, like because 0:20:21.880 --> 0:20:24.560 you're always traveling and going either you leave right after 0:20:24.600 --> 0:20:26.200 the show or in the first thing in the morning, 0:20:26.240 --> 0:20:28.600 and it's always exhausting no matter how you slice it. 0:20:28.960 --> 0:20:30.720 But in Kansas City, we were there for two nights 0:20:30.760 --> 0:20:32.720 and I had one of these ridiculous hotel rooms that 0:20:32.800 --> 0:20:36.160 had about eighteen different boardrooms in it, and we ordered 0:20:36.240 --> 0:20:39.679 late night food. My assistant Carla ordered us this huge spread, 0:20:39.800 --> 0:20:43.080 so we all went upstairs and ate after the show. Yeah, 0:20:43.160 --> 0:20:46.880 that was so fun. Our pizza party was great. Yeah, 0:20:47.000 --> 0:20:49.719 Nashville was fun. Anytime we have like an after party 0:20:49.840 --> 0:20:52.280 or we're able to have an after party after shows 0:20:52.720 --> 0:20:55.520 has been really fun. And she has friends. You have 0:20:55.560 --> 0:20:57.200 friends all around the country that I've been able to 0:20:57.280 --> 0:21:02.560 kind of come like San Jose, l A and different shows. Yeah, 0:21:02.680 --> 0:21:04.960 her friends show up, which is always really fun because 0:21:04.960 --> 0:21:07.680 it's really nice to see your friends get to see you, 0:21:07.680 --> 0:21:12.280 you know before. I love that. Yeah, it has been 0:21:12.359 --> 0:21:15.080 just a nice way for me to visit all my 0:21:15.160 --> 0:21:18.840 friends while I work. Yeah, and you get to like 0:21:19.000 --> 0:21:21.920 be like be fabulous and hilarious and they get to 0:21:21.960 --> 0:21:25.000 come see you. I was curious if there's anything unexpected 0:21:25.040 --> 0:21:28.480 that's happened on tour. Well, the wildest thing is when 0:21:28.760 --> 0:21:32.920 I forget was it Salt Lake City or one show 0:21:33.000 --> 0:21:40.040 where two people drunk? People like stop the show. And 0:21:40.160 --> 0:21:43.200 I had never seen anything like that before. I mean, 0:21:43.320 --> 0:21:46.240 you know, I've had drunk audience members, but it's always 0:21:46.320 --> 0:21:50.720 like one. But this was very like two separate times, 0:21:50.760 --> 0:21:54.639 and that that was bizarre. Yeah, somebody approached the stage. 0:21:54.680 --> 0:21:58.679 They were obviously both really really wasted, and for some reason, 0:21:58.880 --> 0:22:02.000 our security was beefed up at that show. That's exactly 0:22:02.000 --> 0:22:04.920 what the problem was. And they this woman just came 0:22:04.920 --> 0:22:06.639 out and they were both harmless, but it was just 0:22:06.720 --> 0:22:10.679