1
00:00:00,160 --> 00:00:03,800
Speaker 1: My fiance's best friend is making life awful, but my

2
00:00:03,880 --> 00:00:06,920
Speaker 1: fiance won't stand up for me. The course, my fiance

3
00:00:07,080 --> 00:00:09,280
Speaker 1: is the biggest heart, would literally give you the shirt,

4
00:00:09,360 --> 00:00:12,080
Speaker 1: pants and hat off of his body if you ask

5
00:00:12,160 --> 00:00:15,400
Speaker 1: for it. He's a recovering people pleaser, and I get

6
00:00:15,440 --> 00:00:18,160
Speaker 1: it because I also used to be a people pleaser.

7
00:00:18,440 --> 00:00:21,440
Speaker 1: We've been married for five plus years as comes from

8
00:00:21,520 --> 00:00:25,640
Speaker 1: Adventurous Aside six hundred on the best of Rutter Updates.

9
00:00:25,680 --> 00:00:27,720
Speaker 1: So a few months ago I started picking up on

10
00:00:27,840 --> 00:00:32,280
Speaker 1: his best friend making some not so nice comments towards me.

11
00:00:32,479 --> 00:00:34,440
Speaker 1: I'm trying to be vague, but let's just say this

12
00:00:34,479 --> 00:00:37,000
Speaker 1: friend is the type to read who is in the

13
00:00:37,080 --> 00:00:39,760
Speaker 1: room who would be most affected by being picked on,

14
00:00:39,960 --> 00:00:43,200
Speaker 1: and then he picks and picks and picks on them

15
00:00:43,440 --> 00:00:46,919
Speaker 1: until they can't freaking take it anymore. I hate that

16
00:00:47,400 --> 00:00:50,560
Speaker 1: nobody ever really holds him accountable for this, and unfortunately

17
00:00:50,680 --> 00:00:54,200
Speaker 1: I have somehow become his favorite target. I wonder if

18
00:00:54,240 --> 00:00:56,280
Speaker 1: he's funny and that's why no one steps up. But

19
00:00:56,640 --> 00:00:58,960
Speaker 1: I tried to put up with these comments, but it

20
00:00:59,000 --> 00:01:01,279
Speaker 1: started to get really ill elaborate. The friend would make

21
00:01:01,360 --> 00:01:03,920
Speaker 1: up lies about me, saying things I never said he

22
00:01:04,000 --> 00:01:07,120
Speaker 1: once called me in front of all our friends, my

23
00:01:07,200 --> 00:01:11,360
Speaker 1: fiance included, just to yell you're a bad friend into

24
00:01:11,400 --> 00:01:14,600
Speaker 1: the phone and then hang up. Okay, that's a weird

25
00:01:14,600 --> 00:01:16,959
Speaker 1: prank call. Yeah, there's so much to it that I

26
00:01:17,000 --> 00:01:20,240
Speaker 1: can't share because I'm trying to be somewhat anonymous. Start

27
00:01:20,280 --> 00:01:21,960
Speaker 1: of having an effect on my mental health, and I

28
00:01:22,040 --> 00:01:24,080
Speaker 1: ended up having a full breakdown where I told my

29
00:01:24,120 --> 00:01:26,680
Speaker 1: fiance how much this was all starting to hurt me.

30
00:01:26,720 --> 00:01:29,319
Speaker 1: I'm surprised he didn't say anything. The fiance yeah to

31
00:01:29,360 --> 00:01:31,440
Speaker 1: all of this. The first time I broke down over this,

32
00:01:31,560 --> 00:01:34,240
Speaker 1: he said he would talk to his friend about teasing

33
00:01:34,400 --> 00:01:37,600
Speaker 1: slash messing with me. Lest he's not even saying his bullying.

34
00:01:37,600 --> 00:01:40,240
Speaker 1: He's like, oh, he's just a little jokester. Yeah. He

35
00:01:40,280 --> 00:01:42,839
Speaker 1: then told me his friend was sorry and that he'd

36
00:01:42,959 --> 00:01:45,959
Speaker 1: be keeping an ear out for any of those other comments,

37
00:01:46,040 --> 00:01:48,960
Speaker 1: and he'd jumped to my defense if it happened again.

38
00:01:49,320 --> 00:01:52,640
Speaker 1: A few weeks later, I had a second breakdown over

39
00:01:52,680 --> 00:01:56,080
Speaker 1: all this. The situation itself is hitting a very specific

40
00:01:56,320 --> 00:01:59,520
Speaker 1: childhood trauma slash trigger for me. We don't like that.

41
00:02:00,280 --> 00:02:03,440
Speaker 2: That's not good help, Especially now your partner defending you

42
00:02:03,520 --> 00:02:03,800
Speaker 2: for that.

43
00:02:04,040 --> 00:02:08,000
Speaker 1: And he admitted hope he's fiance that his friend didn't

44
00:02:08,040 --> 00:02:10,080
Speaker 1: actually apologize.

45
00:02:09,400 --> 00:02:11,960
Speaker 2: Everyone's lying, everyone's liar.

46
00:02:12,120 --> 00:02:16,200
Speaker 1: He actually said he was sorry I was too sensitive

47
00:02:16,440 --> 00:02:19,880
Speaker 1: to understand his humor. Sorry, my humor is just so edgy, bro.

48
00:02:20,160 --> 00:02:23,320
Speaker 2: Yeah sorry, sorry, I'm so cool and you're like so lame,

49
00:02:23,360 --> 00:02:24,000
Speaker 2: and I'm just like.

50
00:02:24,160 --> 00:02:26,840
Speaker 1: Netflix couldn't handle it either. You know. I said that

51
00:02:26,960 --> 00:02:29,400
Speaker 1: my comedy special too edgy for Netflix.

52
00:02:29,480 --> 00:02:31,600
Speaker 2: Yeah, they wouldn't say they wanted it so bad, but

53
00:02:31,639 --> 00:02:33,600
Speaker 2: they're like, oh, we can't do it. That's fine.

54
00:02:33,720 --> 00:02:39,360
Speaker 1: That's why I streamed it to five people on Rumble. Yeah,

55
00:02:39,680 --> 00:02:40,519
Speaker 1: oh it's for Riot.

56
00:02:42,440 --> 00:02:44,560
Speaker 3: I used to work for a live streamer that livestream

57
00:02:44,600 --> 00:02:45,040
Speaker 3: on Rumble.

58
00:02:45,120 --> 00:02:49,280
Speaker 1: Oh my god that At that point, I told my

59
00:02:49,400 --> 00:02:53,800
Speaker 1: fiance my friendship with this person is over and I

60
00:02:53,880 --> 00:02:58,919
Speaker 1: want zero contact from here on out, even if that

61
00:02:59,000 --> 00:03:01,519
Speaker 1: means I have to miss out of events and parties

62
00:03:01,720 --> 00:03:04,680
Speaker 1: that I would otherwise love to go to. Because are

63
00:03:04,680 --> 00:03:07,200
Speaker 1: you gonna love to go to those parties if this

64
00:03:07,240 --> 00:03:11,280
Speaker 1: guy is constantly haranguing you and saying mean things to you,

65
00:03:11,440 --> 00:03:14,520
Speaker 1: not at all, not at all, like, oh you're so

66
00:03:15,280 --> 00:03:18,800
Speaker 1: I don't like that? Bye bye bye, Sea. He agreed

67
00:03:18,840 --> 00:03:20,680
Speaker 1: with me that all of this is being done with

68
00:03:20,720 --> 00:03:22,480
Speaker 1: the intention to get a rise out of me, and

69
00:03:22,520 --> 00:03:25,519
Speaker 1: that even if we try to get through to this friend,

70
00:03:25,720 --> 00:03:29,680
Speaker 1: he's so diabolical that we could never fully trust him

71
00:03:29,720 --> 00:03:32,040
Speaker 1: not to treat me at least a little bit crappy.

72
00:03:32,280 --> 00:03:33,800
Speaker 1: Why are you friends with this person?

73
00:03:33,840 --> 00:03:37,520
Speaker 2: Why? Like, what does he have to offer? Obviously nothing there?

74
00:03:37,560 --> 00:03:40,040
Speaker 1: But John, I have a girlfriend, Fry. Hello, one of

75
00:03:40,080 --> 00:03:43,440
Speaker 1: your friends, I have a girlfriend, was talking crap like

76
00:03:43,520 --> 00:03:44,640
Speaker 1: this to your girl?

77
00:03:44,680 --> 00:03:45,320
Speaker 3: What are you going to do?

78
00:03:45,480 --> 00:03:45,920
Speaker 2: Not happening?

79
00:03:45,960 --> 00:03:46,520
Speaker 1: What are you going to do?

80
00:03:46,520 --> 00:03:48,600
Speaker 2: It's over? What are you over? Shut down?

81
00:03:48,760 --> 00:03:50,040
Speaker 1: Shut down? Bye?

82
00:03:50,200 --> 00:03:51,120
Speaker 3: How are you shutting this down?

83
00:03:51,160 --> 00:03:51,320
Speaker 1: Yeah?

84
00:03:51,320 --> 00:03:53,160
Speaker 2: How you shut it down? I think it's like, so

85
00:03:53,440 --> 00:04:00,160
Speaker 2: this is again first Yeah, I feel like you could try.

86
00:04:00,080 --> 00:04:02,960
Speaker 3: Because you I could.

87
00:04:03,760 --> 00:04:06,240
Speaker 1: I but you have a girlfriend, Fry.

88
00:04:06,040 --> 00:04:08,880
Speaker 2: I John have a girlfriend, Fry, So I swear I

89
00:04:09,280 --> 00:04:12,360
Speaker 2: think first you can sess out. Is this the type

90
00:04:12,400 --> 00:04:15,800
Speaker 2: of scenario where you could basically just like out of

91
00:04:15,840 --> 00:04:19,039
Speaker 2: contact and because sometimes there are some cases where like

92
00:04:19,120 --> 00:04:22,040
Speaker 2: and it seems like, especially this type of guy, if

93
00:04:22,080 --> 00:04:25,760
Speaker 2: you brought this to him, it could explode everything worse

94
00:04:25,800 --> 00:04:28,800
Speaker 2: and then cause more frustration for everyone involved.

95
00:04:28,920 --> 00:04:30,920
Speaker 1: Maybe he doesn't know how bad it is, and like,

96
00:04:31,000 --> 00:04:33,320
Speaker 1: I think, give the guy a chance to remedy. But

97
00:04:33,360 --> 00:04:35,919
Speaker 1: it also sounds like that's what they've done already.

98
00:04:36,040 --> 00:04:36,280
Speaker 2: Yeah.

99
00:04:36,760 --> 00:04:37,000
Speaker 1: Yeah.

100
00:04:37,279 --> 00:04:40,520
Speaker 2: I think when something reaches a certain point and look,

101
00:04:40,600 --> 00:04:43,479
Speaker 2: it varies differently. If it was like someone who like

102
00:04:43,640 --> 00:04:45,640
Speaker 2: helped him out a lot in this point of life,

103
00:04:45,680 --> 00:04:48,560
Speaker 2: Like if they do have some actual, like true strong

104
00:04:48,600 --> 00:04:51,400
Speaker 2: connective tissue in their relationship, that is another thing. But

105
00:04:51,480 --> 00:04:53,440
Speaker 2: it's just we don't haven't seen any here.

106
00:04:53,760 --> 00:04:56,560
Speaker 1: Well we do have some strong connection coming out.

107
00:04:56,600 --> 00:04:59,279
Speaker 2: Oh no, okay, well there there it is all right.

108
00:04:59,440 --> 00:05:02,080
Speaker 1: My fiance They kept asking me if this meant he

109
00:05:02,160 --> 00:05:04,880
Speaker 1: had to quit the project they're working on?

110
00:05:05,200 --> 00:05:07,400
Speaker 2: What's the project? Who work for toothpases their brand new

111
00:05:07,440 --> 00:05:11,240
Speaker 2: start Toothpaste? Ready to change the Airbnb for dogs? Changing

112
00:05:11,279 --> 00:05:16,120
Speaker 2: ept for trees? Yea, trees will have unlimited knowledge.

113
00:05:16,600 --> 00:05:21,480
Speaker 1: Think of the mitochondrial network, my miocillin network, What's what's

114
00:05:21,520 --> 00:05:25,680
Speaker 1: the freaking mushroom network, myosilin mito.

115
00:05:25,839 --> 00:05:29,200
Speaker 2: I feel like mitochondrial is something that's different myocilia network.

116
00:05:29,240 --> 00:05:31,880
Speaker 1: I think it's like the network of the mushrooms talking

117
00:05:31,920 --> 00:05:32,320
Speaker 1: to each other.

118
00:05:32,440 --> 00:05:33,479
Speaker 2: Love a good mushroom network.

119
00:05:33,640 --> 00:05:36,799
Speaker 1: Love a good my favorite kind of little mushroom network.

120
00:05:36,839 --> 00:05:38,120
Speaker 2: Mushroom network, You're good to go.

121
00:05:38,279 --> 00:05:39,880
Speaker 1: You know they used to call it an elephant walk

122
00:05:39,920 --> 00:05:42,160
Speaker 1: back in my day to call it a mushroom.

123
00:05:41,800 --> 00:05:45,640
Speaker 3: Network, my pro hizz all network.

124
00:05:45,360 --> 00:05:48,280
Speaker 1: My Chris all my, how do you keep putting the chat?

125
00:05:48,440 --> 00:05:50,839
Speaker 1: What is it called? Show me, show me quick, quick quick,

126
00:05:52,040 --> 00:05:56,040
Speaker 1: my Corzial network, something like that. Anyway, my fiance kept

127
00:05:56,080 --> 00:05:58,640
Speaker 1: asking if this meant he had to quit the project

128
00:05:58,640 --> 00:06:01,960
Speaker 1: they're working on. I told him I would never tell

129
00:06:02,040 --> 00:06:05,280
Speaker 1: him he had to because I know how much it

130
00:06:05,360 --> 00:06:07,520
Speaker 1: means to them. Do we know about this project? Am

131
00:06:07,560 --> 00:06:08,599
Speaker 1: I missing something? Nope?

132
00:06:08,880 --> 00:06:11,240
Speaker 2: This might be a niche industry type story.

133
00:06:11,320 --> 00:06:15,120
Speaker 1: What's the what the oh? Because a dude? Because to

134
00:06:15,160 --> 00:06:18,000
Speaker 1: be anonymous? Yea, what is the project? There's probably gonna

135
00:06:18,000 --> 00:06:20,120
Speaker 1: be big details left out? We might Oh god, you

136
00:06:20,200 --> 00:06:21,920
Speaker 1: know how much that annoying.

137
00:06:21,560 --> 00:06:23,640
Speaker 2: Oh that is your number one pet peeple on the show.

138
00:06:23,640 --> 00:06:26,880
Speaker 1: Come on, I want all the details. I told him

139
00:06:26,880 --> 00:06:29,160
Speaker 1: I would never tell him he had to because I

140
00:06:29,160 --> 00:06:31,159
Speaker 1: know how much it means to them. But in all honesty,

141
00:06:31,240 --> 00:06:34,760
Speaker 1: the fact that this person is treating me so poorly

142
00:06:34,920 --> 00:06:38,599
Speaker 1: that I'm having physical stress reactions isn't enough for him

143
00:06:38,640 --> 00:06:42,040
Speaker 1: to want to cut this person off. Does hurt a lot.

144
00:06:42,080 --> 00:06:44,719
Speaker 1: So oh, He's like, you don't have to, but I

145
00:06:44,760 --> 00:06:48,039
Speaker 1: can't believe you wouldn't want to. Yes, that's exactly what

146
00:06:48,440 --> 00:06:52,000
Speaker 1: which is, Like I understand. Am I much quieter than

147
00:06:52,200 --> 00:06:53,360
Speaker 1: John Riley? Hello?

148
00:06:53,400 --> 00:06:53,839
Speaker 2: Hello?

149
00:06:54,120 --> 00:06:56,680
Speaker 1: So like I feel like this is the this is warranted,

150
00:06:56,680 --> 00:07:00,520
Speaker 1: but I feel like it's the classic girlfriend his thoughts

151
00:07:00,520 --> 00:07:02,599
Speaker 1: where it's like I don't want you to I want

152
00:07:02,720 --> 00:07:03,479
Speaker 1: you to want to.

153
00:07:03,800 --> 00:07:05,320
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, exactly.

154
00:07:05,680 --> 00:07:09,000
Speaker 1: Like I think I saw this instagram where it was like,

155
00:07:09,240 --> 00:07:10,880
Speaker 1: do you want to go get ice cream? And the

156
00:07:10,880 --> 00:07:13,640
Speaker 1: guy's like, I'm not really hungry, but like I'll go

157
00:07:13,720 --> 00:07:15,400
Speaker 1: if you want to go, and she's like, no, I

158
00:07:15,400 --> 00:07:17,840
Speaker 1: want I want you to want to go. Yes, Yes,

159
00:07:18,320 --> 00:07:22,920
Speaker 1: we have to go together. My Celium network. That's that's

160
00:07:22,920 --> 00:07:24,360
Speaker 1: what I was. That's what I was trying to hit.

161
00:07:24,440 --> 00:07:28,040
Speaker 1: Pharaoh's thanks. The fact that this isn't a deal breaker

162
00:07:28,080 --> 00:07:31,360
Speaker 1: for him is probably always going to sting a little.

163
00:07:31,440 --> 00:07:33,960
Speaker 1: He's not confrontational at all, and I always knew that.

164
00:07:34,240 --> 00:07:37,720
Speaker 1: But it's not about confrontation. It's about standing in my

165
00:07:37,960 --> 00:07:40,720
Speaker 1: corner and I can't spend the rest of my life

166
00:07:40,760 --> 00:07:43,600
Speaker 1: with someone who isn't in my corner I mean true.

167
00:07:43,480 --> 00:07:46,560
Speaker 2: And then ultimately too. Like we always say, everything is

168
00:07:46,640 --> 00:07:49,480
Speaker 2: unique to each person's wants and needs in a relationship.

169
00:07:49,520 --> 00:07:52,160
Speaker 2: If op is like, Hey, something I want in my

170
00:07:52,280 --> 00:07:55,320
Speaker 2: relationship and life partner is someone who will you know,

171
00:07:55,560 --> 00:07:57,600
Speaker 2: stand up and say stand up for me in these

172
00:07:57,640 --> 00:07:59,560
Speaker 2: types of situations, well then that's what okay?

173
00:07:59,640 --> 00:08:01,640
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, everyone can have different context of what they

174
00:08:01,680 --> 00:08:04,520
Speaker 1: want in a relationship. But it feels like Opie is

175
00:08:04,600 --> 00:08:08,160
Speaker 1: not getting the respect that she needs, or like Opie's

176
00:08:08,200 --> 00:08:10,720
Speaker 1: fiance is not putting up the boundaries of what he

177
00:08:10,800 --> 00:08:14,120
Speaker 1: expects his friends to do and how to treat his partner.

178
00:08:14,240 --> 00:08:16,800
Speaker 2: Yeah so far, Like all he's done is ask him

179
00:08:16,800 --> 00:08:19,160
Speaker 2: to stop, and then he gave a complete anti apology

180
00:08:19,280 --> 00:08:20,080
Speaker 2: and the end.

181
00:08:20,160 --> 00:08:23,200
Speaker 1: Which is whack. Nicole h says she knows her worth. Boom,

182
00:08:23,400 --> 00:08:27,800
Speaker 1: Darren Tuten lad putin. This friend is getting married to

183
00:08:28,000 --> 00:08:30,560
Speaker 1: my best friend in a few months, so they're going

184
00:08:30,600 --> 00:08:34,600
Speaker 1: to be even more intertwined. Oh no, and we're supposed

185
00:08:34,640 --> 00:08:36,240
Speaker 1: to be in the wedding. But I really have no

186
00:08:36,400 --> 00:08:38,880
Speaker 1: clue how I get a literal not in my stomach

187
00:08:38,920 --> 00:08:42,120
Speaker 1: anytime his name is even mentioned. Now, I've seen this

188
00:08:42,200 --> 00:08:44,920
Speaker 1: friend one time since all of this came to a head,

189
00:08:45,000 --> 00:08:47,440
Speaker 1: and he was so over the top nice to me

190
00:08:47,800 --> 00:08:50,400
Speaker 1: that it came off as so at least he's being

191
00:08:50,480 --> 00:08:51,240
Speaker 1: nice now.

192
00:08:51,320 --> 00:08:54,760
Speaker 2: But is it like, Hey, how you doing? Oh my gosh, Hey,

193
00:08:54,760 --> 00:08:57,280
Speaker 2: what's going on in your world? Wow? That's so cool?

194
00:08:57,679 --> 00:08:57,959
Speaker 1: Right?

195
00:08:58,120 --> 00:08:58,440
Speaker 2: Terrible?

196
00:08:58,520 --> 00:08:59,160
Speaker 1: Yeah, terrible?

197
00:08:59,400 --> 00:08:59,800
Speaker 2: Terrible?

198
00:09:00,040 --> 00:09:01,080
Speaker 1: Which would you rather have?

199
00:09:01,520 --> 00:09:04,320
Speaker 2: M I don't know. I hate that. I hate that

200
00:09:04,400 --> 00:09:05,000
Speaker 2: pretty hard.

201
00:09:05,080 --> 00:09:07,360
Speaker 1: So it would kind of suck, But at least it's

202
00:09:07,400 --> 00:09:08,920
Speaker 1: like at least he's trying to change.

203
00:09:09,000 --> 00:09:10,480
Speaker 2: I think I would hate it more, to be honest,

204
00:09:10,640 --> 00:09:12,959
Speaker 2: just my personal preference, I would hate it more. I

205
00:09:13,000 --> 00:09:13,320
Speaker 2: hate that.

206
00:09:13,559 --> 00:09:17,040
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's pretty It would suck. Pretty annoying, right, yeah? Pretty?

207
00:09:17,120 --> 00:09:18,040
Speaker 2: How hard does this suck?

208
00:09:18,120 --> 00:09:18,360
Speaker 3: Sale?

209
00:09:19,080 --> 00:09:23,439
Speaker 1: Tell me it's really hard. I feel like I feel

210
00:09:23,440 --> 00:09:25,480
Speaker 1: like your annoyingly nice voice is just goofy.

211
00:09:25,640 --> 00:09:28,520
Speaker 2: Yeah it is. It is just goofy dopie sponsors.

212
00:09:29,000 --> 00:09:34,559
Speaker 1: Yeah, shout out silly Busney. I had the second breakdown

213
00:09:34,760 --> 00:09:37,600
Speaker 1: a few days afterwards because I realized I'm possibly going

214
00:09:37,640 --> 00:09:40,480
Speaker 1: to be spending the rest of my life on edge,

215
00:09:40,600 --> 00:09:42,679
Speaker 1: literally having an edge sess for the rest of your

216
00:09:42,720 --> 00:09:46,640
Speaker 1: life and on guard anytime this person is even somewhat

217
00:09:46,679 --> 00:09:50,640
Speaker 1: in my vicinity, even if they aren't actively effing with me.

218
00:09:50,960 --> 00:09:52,920
Speaker 1: I don't know how to come to terms with the

219
00:09:52,960 --> 00:09:55,520
Speaker 1: fact that my fiance was willing to lie to me

220
00:09:55,920 --> 00:09:59,599
Speaker 1: on his crappy friend's behalf. Because remember fiance said the

221
00:09:59,640 --> 00:10:03,200
Speaker 1: crappy friend apologized, but he didn't, and he didn't. Is

222
00:10:03,200 --> 00:10:04,400
Speaker 1: that a red flag for the fiance.

223
00:10:04,559 --> 00:10:04,719
Speaker 2: Yeah.

224
00:10:04,760 --> 00:10:06,600
Speaker 1: Yeah, he's trying to protect his friend. Yeah, and not

225
00:10:06,640 --> 00:10:09,760
Speaker 1: really protecting fiance. He's protecting the friend. He's doing way

226
00:10:09,800 --> 00:10:11,280
Speaker 1: more to protect the friend that he is doing.

227
00:10:11,960 --> 00:10:14,320
Speaker 2: And he's the one that's being the menace. He's protecting

228
00:10:14,360 --> 00:10:14,680
Speaker 2: the menace.

229
00:10:14,720 --> 00:10:17,480
Speaker 1: He's protecting the menace. Don't protect Tennis. Put Dennis the

230
00:10:17,520 --> 00:10:19,480
Speaker 1: menace out of business. I don't know how to come

231
00:10:19,520 --> 00:10:21,000
Speaker 1: to terms with the fact that he's willing to lie

232
00:10:21,040 --> 00:10:23,120
Speaker 1: to me on his crappy friend's behalf, but he's not

233
00:10:23,160 --> 00:10:25,720
Speaker 1: willing to stand in my corner against him. I think

234
00:10:25,840 --> 00:10:30,200
Speaker 1: it will always hurt this guy. This guy, this guy

235
00:10:30,600 --> 00:10:34,920
Speaker 1: was supposed to be the best man in our wedding,

236
00:10:37,000 --> 00:10:39,240
Speaker 1: best man in the wedding and going to be marrying

237
00:10:39,320 --> 00:10:40,920
Speaker 1: Op's best friend.

238
00:10:41,960 --> 00:10:45,560
Speaker 2: The ties it's so tied up. You have to you

239
00:10:45,720 --> 00:10:46,160
Speaker 2: have to.

240
00:10:46,720 --> 00:10:49,319
Speaker 1: Address this, and as a result, we haven't been talking

241
00:10:49,400 --> 00:10:52,480
Speaker 1: much about wedding plans. I think if he's still planning

242
00:10:52,520 --> 00:10:56,520
Speaker 1: on this friend being in arm I think, if he's

243
00:10:56,559 --> 00:10:59,560
Speaker 1: still planning on this friend being in our wedding, I

244
00:10:59,800 --> 00:11:03,560
Speaker 1: may have to call it off for my own insanity.

245
00:11:03,720 --> 00:11:05,520
Speaker 1: And that sucks so bad.

246
00:11:05,679 --> 00:11:09,679
Speaker 2: It that just proves how much of an issue it

247
00:11:09,760 --> 00:11:11,840
Speaker 2: is for OP. The question is will.

248
00:11:11,720 --> 00:11:13,319
Speaker 1: The call off the wedding because of this?

249
00:11:13,400 --> 00:11:17,000
Speaker 2: Will the fiance see that, will he actually like really understand?

250
00:11:17,160 --> 00:11:19,320
Speaker 1: Yeah, dude, I feel I mean, she asked, do you

251
00:11:19,320 --> 00:11:21,800
Speaker 1: think she She kind of says like, not quite in

252
00:11:21,840 --> 00:11:24,600
Speaker 1: an altimatum me way, but it's kind of like, you know,

253
00:11:24,840 --> 00:11:27,240
Speaker 1: if this friend is in the wedding, I'm calling it off.

254
00:11:27,440 --> 00:11:30,120
Speaker 2: I think, so like, hey, look this I'm literally getting

255
00:11:30,160 --> 00:11:32,080
Speaker 2: like basically just say what she said. I'm getting nots

256
00:11:32,080 --> 00:11:35,080
Speaker 2: in my stomach. I'm literally beside myself with stress thinking

257
00:11:35,120 --> 00:11:37,920
Speaker 2: about this guy. And in all honesty, if he's the wedding,

258
00:11:37,960 --> 00:11:39,640
Speaker 2: it's just not a wedding that I would want to

259
00:11:39,679 --> 00:11:42,120
Speaker 2: do right now. Yeah, So like if you want him

260
00:11:42,120 --> 00:11:43,640
Speaker 2: as the best man, it's just not a wedding that

261
00:11:43,679 --> 00:11:44,480
Speaker 2: I want to do right now.

262
00:11:44,520 --> 00:11:47,040
Speaker 1: Yeah, Like a lot needs to change with this relationship

263
00:11:47,080 --> 00:11:50,120
Speaker 1: for me to even think about him being involved, let

264
00:11:50,160 --> 00:11:54,480
Speaker 1: alone being the best man. Yeah, let alone being the

265
00:11:54,480 --> 00:11:58,760
Speaker 1: best man. This is effing eating me alive. I love

266
00:11:58,800 --> 00:12:01,520
Speaker 1: my fiance so much. I love his big heart and

267
00:12:01,520 --> 00:12:03,520
Speaker 1: the way he loves with all of it. But he

268
00:12:03,600 --> 00:12:06,160
Speaker 1: loves some truly wretched people, and I don't know if

269
00:12:06,160 --> 00:12:08,840
Speaker 1: he'll enforce any boundaries with those people before the lack

270
00:12:08,880 --> 00:12:11,920
Speaker 1: of boundaries becomes too much for me to handle. I'm

271
00:12:12,000 --> 00:12:14,840
Speaker 1: just hurt, and I'm hurting, and I just want whatever

272
00:12:15,040 --> 00:12:18,040
Speaker 1: outcome to play out so I can stop feeling so

273
00:12:18,160 --> 00:12:22,079
Speaker 1: guilty and awful all the time. And also, John, there's

274
00:12:22,160 --> 00:12:25,800
Speaker 1: an updates. Oh my god, it's fat. Oh it's juicy

275
00:12:25,920 --> 00:12:30,480
Speaker 1: who it's double cheeked up on a Sunday afternoon, ready

276
00:12:30,520 --> 00:12:33,680
Speaker 1: to be licked and slathered and glitter. Oh my, But

277
00:12:33,880 --> 00:12:35,679
Speaker 1: before we do that, we got we got some we

278
00:12:35,760 --> 00:12:38,199
Speaker 1: got some relevant comments before we get another update, before

279
00:12:38,240 --> 00:12:40,600
Speaker 1: we even do that, what advice do you have for

280
00:12:40,679 --> 00:12:42,400
Speaker 1: OP navigating this whole situation.

281
00:12:42,679 --> 00:12:46,480
Speaker 2: I think Op needs to basically share everything she's feeling

282
00:12:46,520 --> 00:12:49,560
Speaker 2: and not even do. Maybe The only quote unquote directive

283
00:12:49,640 --> 00:12:51,839
Speaker 2: she says is like, here's everything I'm feeling. If you

284
00:12:51,880 --> 00:12:53,640
Speaker 2: want him as the best man, I just this is

285
00:12:53,679 --> 00:12:55,840
Speaker 2: just not a wedding that I want to be in

286
00:12:55,920 --> 00:12:56,360
Speaker 2: right now.

287
00:12:56,559 --> 00:12:58,320
Speaker 1: And yeah, you can get married to him.

288
00:12:58,440 --> 00:13:01,720
Speaker 2: Yeah, you get married to him and then see how

289
00:13:01,920 --> 00:13:06,160
Speaker 2: the husband responds from there and if he hopefully this

290
00:13:06,200 --> 00:13:08,600
Speaker 2: is the wake up call and then and then instead

291
00:13:08,640 --> 00:13:11,680
Speaker 2: of being like I want you to want it, he'll

292
00:13:11,720 --> 00:13:16,440
Speaker 2: actually want to solve and he needs to confront and

293
00:13:16,480 --> 00:13:18,560
Speaker 2: address it with the friend. He has to.

294
00:13:18,760 --> 00:13:20,640
Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean he has to. And you can't just

295
00:13:20,720 --> 00:13:23,760
Speaker 1: keep protecting this friend if you want to protect your

296
00:13:23,920 --> 00:13:24,520
Speaker 1: your partner.

297
00:13:24,600 --> 00:13:25,920
Speaker 2: Yeah two tied together.

298
00:13:26,160 --> 00:13:28,760
Speaker 1: Yeah, but we got some relevant comments before we get

299
00:13:28,760 --> 00:13:32,040
Speaker 1: into this update, so relvin comments. Parsek says, if your

300
00:13:32,040 --> 00:13:34,200
Speaker 1: fiance will not stick up for you, it's more than

301
00:13:34,280 --> 00:13:37,200
Speaker 1: just being a people pleaser, he's a doormat. And ad

302
00:13:37,240 --> 00:13:40,199
Speaker 1: your fork eleven eighty four says, and her best friend

303
00:13:40,240 --> 00:13:42,640
Speaker 1: is it much of a friend either? Considering the problematic

304
00:13:42,720 --> 00:13:46,120
Speaker 1: friend's marrying her best friend, she should also be telling

305
00:13:46,200 --> 00:13:50,240
Speaker 1: him to back off to and update one month later, Oh,

306
00:13:50,360 --> 00:13:51,200
Speaker 1: let's get into it.

307
00:13:51,280 --> 00:13:51,760
Speaker 2: Let's do it.

308
00:13:52,000 --> 00:13:55,160
Speaker 1: Never thought i'd actually update this account out of sheer

309
00:13:55,280 --> 00:13:58,240
Speaker 1: effing embarrassment, but I wanted to share this for those

310
00:13:58,280 --> 00:14:01,760
Speaker 1: who encourage me to put myself first. Okay, so I

311
00:14:01,800 --> 00:14:03,920
Speaker 1: think we might get in a good update. Okay, okay's

312
00:14:03,920 --> 00:14:07,080
Speaker 1: putting themselves first. I want you to all know my

313
00:14:07,240 --> 00:14:12,520
Speaker 1: partner absolutely came through and protected me in this. This

314
00:14:12,559 --> 00:14:13,720
Speaker 1: does not usually happen.

315
00:14:13,960 --> 00:14:14,640
Speaker 2: I'm surprised.

316
00:14:14,960 --> 00:14:17,520
Speaker 1: Usually on Reddit we have someone that's being an a

317
00:14:17,600 --> 00:14:19,800
Speaker 1: hole stays an a hole. An a hole in motion

318
00:14:20,000 --> 00:14:21,240
Speaker 1: will continue to stay in motion.

319
00:14:21,360 --> 00:14:22,960
Speaker 2: Indeed, that's the law law.

320
00:14:23,160 --> 00:14:27,360
Speaker 1: Yes, and okay our yeah, it's it's our yeah.

321
00:14:27,240 --> 00:14:29,800
Speaker 2: Freaking okay, okay, physics laws, yeah.

322
00:14:29,880 --> 00:14:32,240
Speaker 1: Okay, physics law. An ahole in motion will stay in motion.

323
00:14:32,680 --> 00:14:36,200
Speaker 1: But this a hole has changed. Maybe there's been a

324
00:14:36,200 --> 00:14:39,840
Speaker 1: another object that has changed the tractory. Maybe maybe redemption

325
00:14:40,000 --> 00:14:43,200
Speaker 1: arc Josephine Medela Burquitt says darn tutan. So I want

326
00:14:43,240 --> 00:14:45,560
Speaker 1: you to know my partner absolutely came through protected me

327
00:14:45,600 --> 00:14:48,320
Speaker 1: in this. We spent all this time since my last

328
00:14:48,360 --> 00:14:52,280
Speaker 1: post up until last week communicating and trying to find

329
00:14:52,280 --> 00:14:56,720
Speaker 1: a resolution wow, and walking through how it got this bad.

330
00:14:56,960 --> 00:15:01,920
Speaker 1: I'm almost waiting for it it's like sign what No,

331
00:15:02,360 --> 00:15:04,680
Speaker 1: he took a lot of accountability for that. This is

332
00:15:04,840 --> 00:15:07,040
Speaker 1: not a case of me giving in. He understands fully

333
00:15:07,080 --> 00:15:09,520
Speaker 1: that this only got so bad because it has never

334
00:15:09,680 --> 00:15:12,640
Speaker 1: been handled correctly, and he has had a major hand

335
00:15:12,680 --> 00:15:14,600
Speaker 1: in that in it not being handled correctly, but hopefully

336
00:15:14,600 --> 00:15:18,360
Speaker 1: also in it now being held correctly. There were so

337
00:15:18,440 --> 00:15:21,360
Speaker 1: many more layers to this than a Reddit post could

338
00:15:21,440 --> 00:15:23,600
Speaker 1: ever have conveyed. I don't know. I think Reddick can

339
00:15:23,640 --> 00:15:25,280
Speaker 1: do a pretty good job of conveying a lot of

340
00:15:25,360 --> 00:15:29,000
Speaker 1: layers a little Shrek like platform. The bottom line is

341
00:15:29,040 --> 00:15:32,360
Speaker 1: we are closer than ever and after a lot of talking,

342
00:15:32,480 --> 00:15:36,040
Speaker 1: we decided on my partner sending a firm but not

343
00:15:36,240 --> 00:15:40,120
Speaker 1: unkind message to his friend explaining the behaviors, explaining that

344
00:15:40,160 --> 00:15:42,960
Speaker 1: they are hurting his partner and that it needs to stop.

345
00:15:43,400 --> 00:15:45,720
Speaker 2: I'm sorry, but I just I just had like that

346
00:15:45,880 --> 00:15:49,120
Speaker 2: is the exact type of thing, A firm basically a

347
00:15:49,400 --> 00:15:53,400
Speaker 2: direct but not intentionally like mean or it's like, hey,

348
00:15:53,480 --> 00:15:57,480
Speaker 2: here's just the truth, the straight facts what we're feeling there.

349
00:15:57,520 --> 00:16:01,120
Speaker 1: It is yeah, and potentially this is maybe the first

350
00:16:01,160 --> 00:16:04,720
Speaker 1: time that this friend is actually getting a detailed expose

351
00:16:05,240 --> 00:16:08,080
Speaker 1: of what he's been doing wrong and like enough detail

352
00:16:08,160 --> 00:16:09,640
Speaker 1: for him to change his behavior.

353
00:16:09,720 --> 00:16:12,520
Speaker 2: Yeah, because possibly what could have happened is like everyone

354
00:16:12,560 --> 00:16:14,800
Speaker 2: else that maybe had these feelings, they're like, all right,

355
00:16:14,800 --> 00:16:16,600
Speaker 2: I'm just gonna like not mess with this guy anymore.

356
00:16:16,600 --> 00:16:19,080
Speaker 2: And he's just like cycling all these friends through and

357
00:16:19,120 --> 00:16:21,000
Speaker 2: then they like fade out and this is the first

358
00:16:21,040 --> 00:16:23,480
Speaker 2: time that's like, no, there's it's reached because they're so

359
00:16:23,560 --> 00:16:25,680
Speaker 2: tied to him, they had to do it right. Yeah, No,

360
00:16:25,880 --> 00:16:26,920
Speaker 2: there was no way around it.

361
00:16:26,960 --> 00:16:30,400
Speaker 1: But John, I see an ICU from Kimberly Fine in

362
00:16:30,520 --> 00:16:32,080
Speaker 1: chat that I don't want to be true, but I'm

363
00:16:32,120 --> 00:16:34,400
Speaker 1: going to read it anyway. Now, my ICU is that

364
00:16:34,440 --> 00:16:37,960
Speaker 1: fiance was cheating with friend's wife and both fed the

365
00:16:38,000 --> 00:16:41,360
Speaker 1: friend fake info about OP. Either fiance needed an out

366
00:16:41,360 --> 00:16:44,320
Speaker 1: before the wedding or he and wife mutually blew up

367
00:16:44,360 --> 00:16:48,040
Speaker 1: the group. That is a crazy ICU. That's a crazy ICU.

368
00:16:48,200 --> 00:16:52,000
Speaker 1: My my ICU is it was all fine until last week,

369
00:16:52,120 --> 00:16:53,920
Speaker 1: like they worked on it like the last three weeks,

370
00:16:53,920 --> 00:16:55,880
Speaker 1: and then this past week things blew up.

371
00:16:55,880 --> 00:16:58,280
Speaker 2: We're yeah, we're about to hit the fan. So basically

372
00:16:58,320 --> 00:17:00,720
Speaker 2: this is saying like he was cheating with who's the

373
00:17:00,920 --> 00:17:02,840
Speaker 2: butt head friend. Do we know just a friend.

374
00:17:03,400 --> 00:17:06,119
Speaker 1: Opie's fiance's best friend is the butt head friend. And

375
00:17:06,160 --> 00:17:09,760
Speaker 1: then Ope's best friend is marrying butt head friend, right.

376
00:17:10,040 --> 00:17:13,440
Speaker 2: And the fiance was cheating with Ope's best friend.

377
00:17:13,600 --> 00:17:16,440
Speaker 1: Potentially, That's what I'm really find is saying that's the ICU.

378
00:17:16,520 --> 00:17:18,520
Speaker 1: I don't know. I don't want that to be true. Yeah,

379
00:17:18,560 --> 00:17:20,120
Speaker 1: but let's see what is actually true.

380
00:17:20,200 --> 00:17:20,560
Speaker 2: Okay.

381
00:17:20,640 --> 00:17:22,919
Speaker 1: So he asked to write up the first draft and

382
00:17:22,960 --> 00:17:24,800
Speaker 1: we could go over together and try to perfect it.

383
00:17:24,920 --> 00:17:27,959
Speaker 1: Reddit please know the first draft my partner wrote was

384
00:17:28,040 --> 00:17:31,280
Speaker 1: so spot on what I needed to read that it

385
00:17:31,320 --> 00:17:35,760
Speaker 1: instantly shifted us into us versus the problem loud when

386
00:17:35,760 --> 00:17:38,000
Speaker 1: we'd been stuck butting heads for a week. He laid

387
00:17:38,040 --> 00:17:40,679
Speaker 1: everything out so clearly and in ways that we hadn't

388
00:17:40,720 --> 00:17:43,119
Speaker 1: even discussed, so I knew it came from him. We

389
00:17:43,200 --> 00:17:45,439
Speaker 1: had to tone down a lot of big emotions. We

390
00:17:45,520 --> 00:17:48,760
Speaker 1: really truly gave the message its best shot to address

391
00:17:48,800 --> 00:17:52,040
Speaker 1: the situation without being hostile. We knew the response would

392
00:17:52,080 --> 00:17:55,000
Speaker 1: be bad no matter what, but I don't think anything

393
00:17:55,240 --> 00:17:59,920
Speaker 1: could have effing prepared us. We're about to get a freakin' response.

394
00:18:00,160 --> 00:18:01,119
Speaker 2: Here we go, Here we go.

395
00:18:01,359 --> 00:18:07,800
Speaker 1: This man went full scorched earth and blew up everything

396
00:18:08,119 --> 00:18:12,360
Speaker 1: almost immediately. How so, he insulted my partner. He told

397
00:18:12,440 --> 00:18:15,040
Speaker 1: him these events didn't happen the way I claimed they did.

398
00:18:15,200 --> 00:18:18,080
Speaker 1: He demanded they meet up alone with a mediator. He

399
00:18:18,200 --> 00:18:21,520
Speaker 1: even threatened to reach out to my partner's parents to

400
00:18:21,560 --> 00:18:24,080
Speaker 1: fill them in, which is probably the moment we stopped

401
00:18:24,080 --> 00:18:26,720
Speaker 1: taking his responses seriously. All of us are almost in

402
00:18:26,760 --> 00:18:29,960
Speaker 1: our thirties. If once wasn't enough, he threatened it twice.

403
00:18:30,160 --> 00:18:33,040
Speaker 2: You're gonna tell my mommy shut up.

404
00:18:33,200 --> 00:18:36,000
Speaker 1: We actually had to call them and warn them, the

405
00:18:36,119 --> 00:18:38,440
Speaker 1: parents that he would be showing up at their place

406
00:18:38,520 --> 00:18:41,480
Speaker 1: later this week and not to open the door. There's

407
00:18:41,520 --> 00:18:44,760
Speaker 1: still a good chance he'll attempt it. This guy sucks.

408
00:18:44,840 --> 00:18:49,879
Speaker 1: Good as great to know this before you have him

409
00:18:49,880 --> 00:18:51,800
Speaker 1: as a best man in your wedding.

410
00:18:52,000 --> 00:18:53,920
Speaker 2: Thank god, God, thank god.

411
00:18:54,040 --> 00:18:56,920
Speaker 1: We stayed respectful throughout all of this, which I feel

412
00:18:56,920 --> 00:18:58,800
Speaker 1: good about because I think it's easy to stoop down

413
00:18:58,800 --> 00:19:01,840
Speaker 1: to that level and like tossome totally and stuff back.

414
00:19:01,880 --> 00:19:04,159
Speaker 1: But they kept the high ground. There we go, anakin,

415
00:19:04,240 --> 00:19:04,800
Speaker 1: that's what we like.

416
00:19:05,200 --> 00:19:08,560
Speaker 3: No, no, come on, Obi, there we go.

417
00:19:08,440 --> 00:19:11,040
Speaker 1: Well, well, he was trying to get the high ground.

418
00:19:11,280 --> 00:19:13,720
Speaker 3: The eye ground. No, and again that's the line.

419
00:19:13,760 --> 00:19:16,040
Speaker 1: You know what, what does he say back? You know

420
00:19:16,119 --> 00:19:19,320
Speaker 1: nothing about my power or something? You know nothing? But

421
00:19:20,359 --> 00:19:21,200
Speaker 1: is that what he says back?

422
00:19:21,240 --> 00:19:23,040
Speaker 3: I don't know. I think we're gonna be him for Halloween.

423
00:19:23,040 --> 00:19:23,880
Speaker 3: So I gotta figure this out.

424
00:19:23,920 --> 00:19:25,080
Speaker 1: You're gonna be him for Halloween?

425
00:19:25,359 --> 00:19:31,520
Speaker 3: Anakin favorite aie gonna be uh Hadme Padme nice or

426
00:19:31,560 --> 00:19:32,800
Speaker 3: Obi wan Fuyer combo.

427
00:19:33,520 --> 00:19:35,160
Speaker 2: Yeah, there we go.

428
00:19:35,400 --> 00:19:38,240
Speaker 1: You know, Anakin was like seven and Padme was like fourteen.

429
00:19:38,440 --> 00:19:40,920
Speaker 3: Cool, it was different. It was a different galaxy, different,

430
00:19:41,440 --> 00:19:47,800
Speaker 3: different galaxy YouTubers and these Plutron nine here's age of

431
00:19:47,840 --> 00:19:49,480
Speaker 3: consent with miners.

432
00:19:49,640 --> 00:19:50,560
Speaker 2: Yeah.

433
00:19:50,600 --> 00:19:54,200
Speaker 1: Well, we stayed respectful throughout all this, which I feel

434
00:19:54,200 --> 00:19:56,639
Speaker 1: good about. We didn't stoop to his level, we didn't

435
00:19:56,640 --> 00:20:00,399
Speaker 1: insult anyone. We asked for basic human respect, and somehow

436
00:20:00,440 --> 00:20:03,840
Speaker 1: it blew up spectacularly. In the end, we both received

437
00:20:03,880 --> 00:20:08,879
Speaker 1: a massive wall of text from my now ex best friend.

438
00:20:09,240 --> 00:20:12,119
Speaker 1: Remember the best friend was being married to him, fully

439
00:20:12,240 --> 00:20:14,520
Speaker 1: backing up her man and telling her side of the story,

440
00:20:14,640 --> 00:20:18,000
Speaker 1: which is so insanely far off from what actually happened

441
00:20:18,240 --> 00:20:21,119
Speaker 1: that all I can do is laugh. Wow, what a

442
00:20:21,200 --> 00:20:24,520
Speaker 1: terrible response, but I would love to say they do

443
00:20:24,600 --> 00:20:25,440
Speaker 1: have each other's backs.

444
00:20:25,520 --> 00:20:26,280
Speaker 2: They deserve each other.

445
00:20:26,280 --> 00:20:28,480
Speaker 1: They deserve each other. They deserve each other. We've been

446
00:20:28,640 --> 00:20:31,600
Speaker 1: shifting from crying to being struck to just straight up

447
00:20:31,680 --> 00:20:34,200
Speaker 1: laughing because of the absurdity. I went into this thinking

448
00:20:34,200 --> 00:20:36,520
Speaker 1: she was brainwashed, but turns out I was wrong. They're

449
00:20:36,560 --> 00:20:39,320
Speaker 1: a perfect mas. I wish them all the best. Dude,

450
00:20:39,320 --> 00:20:41,119
Speaker 1: I feel like OPI and us were like kind of

451
00:20:41,160 --> 00:20:43,880
Speaker 1: on the same wavelege you I see you seeing us.

452
00:20:44,119 --> 00:20:47,359
Speaker 1: Oh also, there's a guys. Guys, I skipped ahead a

453
00:20:47,359 --> 00:20:50,440
Speaker 1: little bit. There's another update after this two months later.

454
00:20:50,840 --> 00:20:54,720
Speaker 1: Oh my god, and it gets even crazier, huh. I

455
00:20:54,720 --> 00:20:56,800
Speaker 1: wish them all the best. I am sending them one

456
00:20:56,880 --> 00:20:59,399
Speaker 1: last message setting the record straight, which my partner I

457
00:20:59,480 --> 00:21:01,760
Speaker 1: decided to get there was the best approach apart from

458
00:21:01,800 --> 00:21:05,639
Speaker 1: just ghosting before moving on from this entirely. I'm going

459
00:21:05,640 --> 00:21:09,399
Speaker 1: to make it very clear this is done, zero contact, indefinitely,

460
00:21:09,640 --> 00:21:13,720
Speaker 1: and I will never look back. There we go, my pardoner.

461
00:21:13,760 --> 00:21:16,160
Speaker 1: I both deserve way better friends, and we both see

462
00:21:16,280 --> 00:21:19,199
Speaker 1: that so clearly now. I am so so effing glad

463
00:21:19,440 --> 00:21:22,560
Speaker 1: I learned my friend's true colors before we dropped eight

464
00:21:22,800 --> 00:21:26,240
Speaker 1: hundred dollars on a hotel for the wedding. Thank you

465
00:21:26,320 --> 00:21:28,600
Speaker 1: to everyone who was kind. Not only did I put

466
00:21:28,600 --> 00:21:31,560
Speaker 1: myself first in the end, but my partner did too. Again,

467
00:21:31,680 --> 00:21:33,719
Speaker 1: there was an update coming that is fat and it

468
00:21:33,760 --> 00:21:36,480
Speaker 1: is juicy. So just wait wait, we're going to get

469
00:21:36,480 --> 00:21:37,919
Speaker 1: to it in a second. We're going to take this

470
00:21:37,960 --> 00:21:40,480
Speaker 1: week in stride and process at all, grieve the friendships

471
00:21:40,520 --> 00:21:42,960
Speaker 1: who once thought were forever. That's a sad sentence. And

472
00:21:43,040 --> 00:21:45,400
Speaker 1: at the end of the week we have a conveniently

473
00:21:45,480 --> 00:21:49,000
Speaker 1: timed vacation to my partner's family cottage. I think we're

474
00:21:49,000 --> 00:21:52,119
Speaker 1: going to come out stronger because we already feel it again.

475
00:21:52,160 --> 00:21:54,639
Speaker 1: Thank you to those who had something productive to say,

476
00:21:54,840 --> 00:21:57,159
Speaker 1: and I've made my peace with all the rest. I

477
00:21:57,200 --> 00:22:00,399
Speaker 1: guess if the guy does something else outlandish, maybe all update.

478
00:22:00,440 --> 00:22:03,520
Speaker 1: But for now, this chapter is closed and there's another update,

479
00:22:03,800 --> 00:22:06,399
Speaker 1: and I'm so ready for it to start collecting dusts.

480
00:22:06,600 --> 00:22:09,720
Speaker 1: The dust will not settle because we are going to

481
00:22:09,760 --> 00:22:12,520
Speaker 1: get into an update that is gonna blow all this

482
00:22:12,680 --> 00:22:15,520
Speaker 1: dust into a whirlwind. A little dust devil of a

483
00:22:15,600 --> 00:22:18,480
Speaker 1: next update. Not ready, but John, not ready? How do

484
00:22:18,520 --> 00:22:22,520
Speaker 1: you feel about sending another text. So they said that

485
00:22:22,560 --> 00:22:24,640
Speaker 1: first text, how do you feel about the second text?

486
00:22:24,680 --> 00:22:27,439
Speaker 1: Basically saying like, hey, everything you said was wrong? Is

487
00:22:27,440 --> 00:22:29,359
Speaker 1: that necessary? Not necessary? Would you do it? What do

488
00:22:29,400 --> 00:22:30,719
Speaker 1: you think? So?

489
00:22:31,040 --> 00:22:34,400
Speaker 2: What they accomplished with the first text was very clearly

490
00:22:34,720 --> 00:22:38,480
Speaker 2: and directly, without being too harsh, explain what he did wrong.

491
00:22:38,560 --> 00:22:41,760
Speaker 2: So now he is informed, here is everything where you

492
00:22:41,800 --> 00:22:45,720
Speaker 2: went wrong. Also, he is going scorched earth on them,

493
00:22:46,000 --> 00:22:49,440
Speaker 2: which means they've already communicated everything. More contact will probably

494
00:22:49,520 --> 00:22:52,680
Speaker 2: lead to more conflict, more, more conflict, more friction. At

495
00:22:52,680 --> 00:22:54,800
Speaker 2: this point, this is where I think they can bow

496
00:22:54,800 --> 00:22:57,120
Speaker 2: out and just try to go no contact, block it out.

497
00:22:57,160 --> 00:22:59,760
Speaker 2: They've already explained everything.

498
00:22:59,480 --> 00:23:03,240
Speaker 1: They need, so so you think you would not need

499
00:23:03,480 --> 00:23:07,200
Speaker 1: Like so the crazy friend's fiance who sent that wall

500
00:23:07,280 --> 00:23:10,879
Speaker 1: of texts like chastising Op and O PE's fiance, you

501
00:23:10,880 --> 00:23:14,280
Speaker 1: wouldn't respond to that with like the right story?

502
00:23:14,800 --> 00:23:17,560
Speaker 2: I think I think what you could respond? Yeah? Oh,

503
00:23:17,640 --> 00:23:19,719
Speaker 2: like the best friend getting married reaching out?

504
00:23:19,840 --> 00:23:23,919
Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, because it's like they didn't respond to oh

505
00:23:24,040 --> 00:23:28,280
Speaker 1: pee's husband's best friend. Yeah, but Op's best friend that's marrying.

506
00:23:28,320 --> 00:23:32,200
Speaker 1: Ope's husband's best friend just sent something in defense of

507
00:23:32,280 --> 00:23:34,840
Speaker 1: her husband. Oh p he's best friend, So like, do

508
00:23:34,880 --> 00:23:36,159
Speaker 1: you say anything back to that?

509
00:23:36,280 --> 00:23:38,240
Speaker 2: Yeah, say that five times fast. Okay, I was thinking

510
00:23:38,359 --> 00:23:40,359
Speaker 2: I was thinking of the husband's best friend. Now that

511
00:23:40,440 --> 00:23:43,160
Speaker 2: it's oh PE's best friend. I think you could say,

512
00:23:43,359 --> 00:23:46,920
Speaker 2: you don't have to say this, but you'd be like, listen, honestly,

513
00:23:47,000 --> 00:23:49,359
Speaker 2: you could forward the message. You could just like, hey,

514
00:23:49,640 --> 00:23:53,159
Speaker 2: here's everything we told him. Maybe you don't need to,

515
00:23:53,320 --> 00:23:55,879
Speaker 2: but hey, here's everything we told him. Like, you know,

516
00:23:56,040 --> 00:23:57,960
Speaker 2: I'm not here to change your mind. You can believe

517
00:23:57,960 --> 00:24:00,840
Speaker 2: what you want to believe. But we're going no contact

518
00:24:00,840 --> 00:24:03,080
Speaker 2: with him and on. Like, you know, if you're with him,

519
00:24:03,200 --> 00:24:06,200
Speaker 2: so be it. Best of luck, but you know our

520
00:24:06,240 --> 00:24:09,639
Speaker 2: our friendship revices. You kick continue peace out girls and

521
00:24:09,800 --> 00:24:10,159
Speaker 2: say that.

522
00:24:10,320 --> 00:24:12,560
Speaker 1: I actually also I agree with what you said. I

523
00:24:12,600 --> 00:24:14,760
Speaker 1: also agree with with Cassie S said. I think the

524
00:24:14,800 --> 00:24:18,000
Speaker 1: second text was out of courtesy to not just ghost them.

525
00:24:18,320 --> 00:24:19,600
Speaker 1: What I think is a good way to make it

526
00:24:19,640 --> 00:24:21,880
Speaker 1: clear that things end definitely without being an a hole.

527
00:24:22,119 --> 00:24:24,480
Speaker 1: And I agree. I agree. So I think in conclusion,

528
00:24:24,480 --> 00:24:26,719
Speaker 1: it sounds like we're all in agreement that the second

529
00:24:26,760 --> 00:24:30,240
Speaker 1: text to oh P's best friend that's marrying OPI's husband's

530
00:24:30,240 --> 00:24:31,440
Speaker 1: best friend is a good move.

531
00:24:31,480 --> 00:24:33,040
Speaker 2: It's a move, it's a it's a good it's a move.

532
00:24:33,400 --> 00:24:38,160
Speaker 1: But we got some relevanc gomments and then another juicy

533
00:24:38,400 --> 00:24:41,080
Speaker 1: thick update. Ready, I'm ready, now, God, there is a

534
00:24:41,200 --> 00:24:44,440
Speaker 1: third butt cheek growing on that right in the middle.

535
00:24:44,480 --> 00:24:46,160
Speaker 2: Who thought it's like that?

536
00:24:46,480 --> 00:24:50,399
Speaker 1: It's like that the three boob lady in uh total recall,

537
00:24:50,560 --> 00:24:55,920
Speaker 1: but cheeks with cheeks. It's a bbbl so bbb l Yeah, yeah,

538
00:24:56,320 --> 00:24:57,240
Speaker 1: don't don't show it.

539
00:24:57,280 --> 00:25:01,520
Speaker 2: But Riley just pulls up a search before I finishes

540
00:25:01,560 --> 00:25:02,880
Speaker 2: loading demonetized.

541
00:25:03,160 --> 00:25:05,320
Speaker 1: Is that the lady in total Recall? Or is it

542
00:25:05,520 --> 00:25:07,520
Speaker 1: Blade Runner? Yeah? I think it's total recall.

543
00:25:07,880 --> 00:25:11,840
Speaker 2: Yeah, he's adding that to my movie cues.

544
00:25:12,119 --> 00:25:15,959
Speaker 1: Yeah, kind of crazy anyway, So comments before we get

545
00:25:15,960 --> 00:25:19,200
Speaker 1: into the update. Unquantifiable Life says, it sounds like both

546
00:25:19,280 --> 00:25:21,879
Speaker 1: of your ex friends were from your people pleasing days.

547
00:25:21,880 --> 00:25:23,760
Speaker 1: It's time for a fresh start, and I'm so glad

548
00:25:23,880 --> 00:25:25,760
Speaker 1: you're both going to get it before your wedding so

549
00:25:25,920 --> 00:25:29,680
Speaker 1: they're not in your photos. And Wielder of Aphorism says

550
00:25:29,960 --> 00:25:33,439
Speaker 1: good riddance to bad or rubbish, wishing you both piece

551
00:25:33,760 --> 00:25:35,480
Speaker 1: and we're gonna get a piece of this next update,

552
00:25:35,880 --> 00:25:39,280
Speaker 1: right this second two months later. So hey, y'all told

553
00:25:39,320 --> 00:25:42,600
Speaker 1: myself I wouldn't update again, but there has been a

554
00:25:42,720 --> 00:25:47,480
Speaker 1: pretty massive development. Massive Not sure if anyone is really

555
00:25:47,560 --> 00:25:50,720
Speaker 1: that invested in this crap show. We are, but it's

556
00:25:50,760 --> 00:25:53,520
Speaker 1: actually helped me to type it out the first couple times,

557
00:25:53,520 --> 00:25:55,760
Speaker 1: so maybe I will feel a bit better if I

558
00:25:55,800 --> 00:25:59,480
Speaker 1: do it again. Sorry in advance for how disgustingly long

559
00:25:59,720 --> 00:26:01,760
Speaker 1: this is going to be. And this is a long one,

560
00:26:02,040 --> 00:26:04,520
Speaker 1: and this might be a rough one, y'all, So strap in,

561
00:26:04,920 --> 00:26:08,040
Speaker 1: get the tissues, and let's wipe away of those tears,

562
00:26:08,080 --> 00:26:11,040
Speaker 1: because I'm ready. It's gonna be tough. A few weeks ago,

563
00:26:11,200 --> 00:26:14,480
Speaker 1: The A Hole showed his entire hand. He sent my

564
00:26:14,560 --> 00:26:18,280
Speaker 1: partner a message at eleven am on Monday, and it

565
00:26:18,359 --> 00:26:23,320
Speaker 1: is the most unhinged crap I've ever read. And I

566
00:26:23,359 --> 00:26:25,240
Speaker 1: will sum it up for you right now. The A

567
00:26:25,400 --> 00:26:29,160
Speaker 1: hole said he believed my partner is in an abusive

568
00:26:29,440 --> 00:26:33,879
Speaker 1: relationship and he should leave me quote for his own happiness.

569
00:26:34,080 --> 00:26:37,040
Speaker 1: He claimed he has the evidence to support this. He's

570
00:26:37,040 --> 00:26:40,200
Speaker 1: coming with his MLA cited sources right now, and it's

571
00:26:40,200 --> 00:26:43,639
Speaker 1: not just from Wikipedia, it's from like qualified places. He

572
00:26:43,720 --> 00:26:46,520
Speaker 1: went to the library do we decimal system, took out

573
00:26:46,560 --> 00:26:49,680
Speaker 1: a book, highlighted it to the little little clippins put in.

574
00:26:49,600 --> 00:26:51,399
Speaker 2: The paper, you're not an academic, sir no.

575
00:26:51,680 --> 00:26:54,240
Speaker 1: He claimed he has evidence to support this. He admitted

576
00:26:54,359 --> 00:26:56,520
Speaker 1: this was a big message he would have given had

577
00:26:56,520 --> 00:26:59,000
Speaker 1: they met in person, and it's only the beginning. He

578
00:26:59,080 --> 00:27:02,840
Speaker 1: also told to him he was worried sending the message

579
00:27:02,880 --> 00:27:05,000
Speaker 1: would make things even worse for my partner if I

580
00:27:05,000 --> 00:27:07,120
Speaker 1: saw it. He said, I am someone he can never

581
00:27:07,240 --> 00:27:10,639
Speaker 1: forgive and he will never want to associate with ever again.

582
00:27:10,840 --> 00:27:13,520
Speaker 1: He ended it saying he hopes he'll leave me so

583
00:27:13,560 --> 00:27:17,080
Speaker 1: my partner can apologize for breaking up the band. Yes

584
00:27:17,160 --> 00:27:19,600
Speaker 1: it was a band. Oh, the project was a band.

585
00:27:19,760 --> 00:27:21,040
Speaker 2: At least we figured that out.

586
00:27:21,119 --> 00:27:21,560
Speaker 1: That's funny.

587
00:27:21,600 --> 00:27:23,840
Speaker 2: But I feel like with more mysteries going up and.

588
00:27:23,880 --> 00:27:27,080
Speaker 1: They can start to repair their friendship. Obviously a whole

589
00:27:27,119 --> 00:27:29,800
Speaker 1: a lot to digest so really quick. That was a

590
00:27:29,800 --> 00:27:32,960
Speaker 1: little bit confusing to me. But what it sounds like

591
00:27:33,400 --> 00:27:38,359
Speaker 1: is like this guy sent a large message of what

592
00:27:38,760 --> 00:27:43,120
Speaker 1: was wrong with OP and the fiance's relationship to the fiance. Yeah,

593
00:27:43,160 --> 00:27:44,720
Speaker 1: and it's like this is why you should leave. And

594
00:27:44,720 --> 00:27:46,600
Speaker 1: I think we're going to get some insight into what

595
00:27:46,840 --> 00:27:51,399
Speaker 1: he's saying. He says he could not forgive op like

596
00:27:51,560 --> 00:27:54,800
Speaker 1: for what we were about to find out. Obviously a

597
00:27:54,840 --> 00:27:57,040
Speaker 1: whole lot to digest. I know y'all don't know me,

598
00:27:57,160 --> 00:27:59,880
Speaker 1: but I am obviously not abusing my partner. I shouldn't

599
00:27:59,880 --> 00:28:02,439
Speaker 1: even have to clarify that, but I will. Anyways, this

600
00:28:02,480 --> 00:28:05,520
Speaker 1: guy one hundred percent excommunicated from our lives indefinitely, not

601
00:28:05,640 --> 00:28:08,159
Speaker 1: that he already wasn't at that point. In light of

602
00:28:08,200 --> 00:28:10,000
Speaker 1: this new info, I'd like to share some of the

603
00:28:10,000 --> 00:28:12,960
Speaker 1: things the A hole has done over the past year

604
00:28:13,160 --> 00:28:15,680
Speaker 1: that made me realize he was effing with me. But

605
00:28:15,760 --> 00:28:18,359
Speaker 1: I didn't clock it at the time because, much like

606
00:28:18,440 --> 00:28:20,880
Speaker 1: some of you, I thought I was just being sensitive.

607
00:28:21,119 --> 00:28:24,359
Speaker 1: So my partner I joined some pals, including A Hole,

608
00:28:24,560 --> 00:28:27,760
Speaker 1: to play a game together online, Lethal Company. If you're familiar,

609
00:28:27,920 --> 00:28:29,840
Speaker 1: I have many many hours in the game and know

610
00:28:29,920 --> 00:28:32,280
Speaker 1: the monsters quite well, so it was pretty confused when

611
00:28:32,280 --> 00:28:35,280
Speaker 1: I was slaughtered by a bracken three game days in

612
00:28:35,320 --> 00:28:39,080
Speaker 1: a row, almost immediately upon entering the facility and splitting

613
00:28:39,120 --> 00:28:41,480
Speaker 1: from the group. I guess that's some some gameplay. Top

614
00:28:41,880 --> 00:28:44,640
Speaker 1: game crap. I mentioned at one point that i'd be

615
00:28:44,680 --> 00:28:46,560
Speaker 1: having a lot more fun if I wasn't dying so

616
00:28:46,680 --> 00:28:50,360
Speaker 1: quickly every time, and the A Hole mockingly said must

617
00:28:50,480 --> 00:28:54,040
Speaker 1: be a skill issue. After a few more deaths, this

618
00:28:54,160 --> 00:28:56,480
Speaker 1: time with me getting at least to explore a bit

619
00:28:56,520 --> 00:28:59,680
Speaker 1: before getting my next snap, I asked if anyone had

620
00:28:59,720 --> 00:29:04,160
Speaker 1: the Troll Company mod installed, which allows the server host

621
00:29:04,480 --> 00:29:08,160
Speaker 1: to play as the monsters. Suddenly, the A Hole had

622
00:29:08,200 --> 00:29:12,160
Speaker 1: to go and the lobby conveniently disbanded, so basically they

623
00:29:12,200 --> 00:29:15,520
Speaker 1: were ringing the game against Opie to make her immediately be.

624
00:29:16,760 --> 00:29:18,440
Speaker 3: So he might have been the monsters and she was

625
00:29:18,480 --> 00:29:19,320
Speaker 3: trying to find him off.

626
00:29:19,400 --> 00:29:22,040
Speaker 1: Yeah. I never brought my suspicions up to anyone because

627
00:29:22,040 --> 00:29:24,200
Speaker 1: I knew it would be my word against his and

628
00:29:24,240 --> 00:29:26,360
Speaker 1: I had no solid proof, so I wasn't positive. But

629
00:29:26,400 --> 00:29:28,360
Speaker 1: when I finally mentioned it to my partner a couple

630
00:29:28,400 --> 00:29:30,480
Speaker 1: of weeks ago after the text was sent, he told

631
00:29:30,480 --> 00:29:32,840
Speaker 1: me he remembers the a Hole staying on the ship

632
00:29:32,880 --> 00:29:37,080
Speaker 1: and secretly going AFK multiple times in the game, which

633
00:29:37,120 --> 00:29:41,160
Speaker 1: lines up pretty perfectly with my in game deaths.

634
00:29:41,320 --> 00:29:43,640
Speaker 2: Dude, even even messing with it. She can't even live

635
00:29:43,680 --> 00:29:45,160
Speaker 2: for game life without him.

636
00:29:45,040 --> 00:29:47,760
Speaker 1: Involved, Dude, He's a psycho. He's a psycho. When I

637
00:29:47,800 --> 00:29:50,200
Speaker 1: said the A hole was being too nice the time

638
00:29:50,240 --> 00:29:52,960
Speaker 1: he saw him after my partner called him about his

639
00:29:53,080 --> 00:29:55,520
Speaker 1: comments affecting me, I don't think I explained it right.

640
00:29:55,600 --> 00:29:57,560
Speaker 1: My partner and I were sitting at a table at

641
00:29:57,600 --> 00:29:59,840
Speaker 1: a local show and the A hole sat next to me,

642
00:30:00,560 --> 00:30:03,360
Speaker 1: not my partner, and wouldn't stop touching my arm and

643
00:30:03,520 --> 00:30:06,400
Speaker 1: asking me if I was enjoying the show. Multiple times,

644
00:30:06,440 --> 00:30:08,760
Speaker 1: he would just stare at me and grin as wide

645
00:30:08,760 --> 00:30:11,160
Speaker 1: as he could. If I had just been told something

646
00:30:11,240 --> 00:30:14,760
Speaker 1: I did hurt my partners, hurt my friend's partner, I

647
00:30:14,800 --> 00:30:17,360
Speaker 1: don't think i'd be all over them the way this

648
00:30:17,400 --> 00:30:19,960
Speaker 1: guy was to me. Hell, if it were me, i'd

649
00:30:20,000 --> 00:30:22,840
Speaker 1: at least throw a sorry about the other night their way,

650
00:30:23,160 --> 00:30:25,280
Speaker 1: and it felt like he was gloating that he got

651
00:30:25,320 --> 00:30:27,360
Speaker 1: away with it. It was comically over the top and

652
00:30:27,400 --> 00:30:30,440
Speaker 1: made me and my partner were uncomfortable. We talked on

653
00:30:30,480 --> 00:30:32,200
Speaker 1: the drive home and we both felt the same way

654
00:30:32,200 --> 00:30:33,960
Speaker 1: about it. Okay, so it seems like at least they're

655
00:30:33,960 --> 00:30:35,640
Speaker 1: on the same page with that. I was hanging out

656
00:30:35,640 --> 00:30:37,960
Speaker 1: with my friend at her place and the ahle was there,

657
00:30:38,000 --> 00:30:39,720
Speaker 1: so we all decided to head to my place and

658
00:30:39,760 --> 00:30:43,280
Speaker 1: hang with my partner as a foursome unfortunate choice of words.

659
00:30:44,200 --> 00:30:46,560
Speaker 1: Right before we left, the ahole asked if I knew

660
00:30:46,600 --> 00:30:49,640
Speaker 1: our mutual friend's big secret. I did not. I'm also

661
00:30:49,720 --> 00:30:52,120
Speaker 1: not very close with this friend. My friend already knew

662
00:30:52,320 --> 00:30:54,680
Speaker 1: and told him they should just tell me because I

663
00:30:54,680 --> 00:30:58,040
Speaker 1: wouldn't be that invested. But a hole told her my

664
00:30:58,160 --> 00:31:01,200
Speaker 1: partner didn't know yet and they couldn't tell me until

665
00:31:01,200 --> 00:31:03,320
Speaker 1: we all got to my place and told him. He

666
00:31:03,440 --> 00:31:06,240
Speaker 1: kept going on how big the secret was and insisted

667
00:31:06,240 --> 00:31:08,440
Speaker 1: that I'd freak out once I knew. I made a

668
00:31:08,440 --> 00:31:11,520
Speaker 1: comment about how we were taking different cars and there

669
00:31:11,560 --> 00:31:13,400
Speaker 1: was a chance my friend would just tell me on

670
00:31:13,440 --> 00:31:15,960
Speaker 1: the way, so he looked her face and told her

671
00:31:16,000 --> 00:31:18,920
Speaker 1: that he'd be genuinely upset with her if she told

672
00:31:18,960 --> 00:31:22,200
Speaker 1: me before he told my partner, Psycho, what is happening here?

673
00:31:22,520 --> 00:31:24,720
Speaker 1: We respected that. When we got to my place, it

674
00:31:24,800 --> 00:31:27,840
Speaker 1: was obvious my partner already knew. The big secret was

675
00:31:27,880 --> 00:31:30,560
Speaker 1: simply that our friend was dating someone. I found out

676
00:31:30,640 --> 00:31:33,080
Speaker 1: later that the a hole had called my partner the

677
00:31:33,120 --> 00:31:35,800
Speaker 1: minute he had got in his car and told him

678
00:31:36,240 --> 00:31:38,560
Speaker 1: that both me and my friend didn't know, and they

679
00:31:38,600 --> 00:31:40,960
Speaker 1: should put on a big show of telling us both together.

680
00:31:41,080 --> 00:31:43,480
Speaker 1: My partner had known for weeks and the friend group

681
00:31:43,680 --> 00:31:46,320
Speaker 1: had openly discussed it a few times, and it hadn't

682
00:31:46,360 --> 00:31:48,840
Speaker 1: come up with me because, as I said, I'm not

683
00:31:49,000 --> 00:31:51,680
Speaker 1: very close with his friend. I got baited loll. Truly

684
00:31:51,840 --> 00:31:55,480
Speaker 1: exhausting behavior. But so far it is exhausting. But it's

685
00:31:55,520 --> 00:31:58,160
Speaker 1: like not like I'm reading this and it's like it's

686
00:31:58,240 --> 00:32:01,400
Speaker 1: like weird, but it's not a gregious.

687
00:32:00,920 --> 00:32:04,360
Speaker 2: It's not ultimately harmful because it's or it's like it's.

688
00:32:04,320 --> 00:32:06,280
Speaker 1: It doesn't feel egregious if.

689
00:32:06,200 --> 00:32:10,520
Speaker 2: It's like side of he's using this the actual truth

690
00:32:10,560 --> 00:32:12,840
Speaker 2: itself isn't that crazy and he's just playing this weird

691
00:32:12,880 --> 00:32:14,320
Speaker 2: game game them along.

692
00:32:14,480 --> 00:32:18,120
Speaker 1: And but like Joseph Mudola Burka says, he is abusive.

693
00:32:18,440 --> 00:32:22,120
Speaker 1: I don't know if I would throw around abusive quite

694
00:32:22,200 --> 00:32:25,840
Speaker 1: yet for this behavior. But it's definitely weird, and it's

695
00:32:25,840 --> 00:32:29,480
Speaker 1: definitely it feels like a little there's the beginnings of

696
00:32:29,520 --> 00:32:30,640
Speaker 1: manipulation going on.

697
00:32:30,880 --> 00:32:33,720
Speaker 2: Yeah, and we're kind of going back and re explaining

698
00:32:34,240 --> 00:32:35,360
Speaker 2: back context.

699
00:32:35,040 --> 00:32:37,760
Speaker 1: Right because the context, like what then in terms of

700
00:32:37,760 --> 00:32:40,720
Speaker 1: the back context, that's it just unhinged obviously. Yeah. Yeah,

701
00:32:40,720 --> 00:32:42,600
Speaker 1: but the back context, I'm like, oh, like, it's not

702
00:32:42,680 --> 00:32:42,920
Speaker 1: like I.

703
00:32:42,920 --> 00:32:46,160
Speaker 2: Feel like we're we're approaching. We haven't reached the pinnacle yet.

704
00:32:46,160 --> 00:32:49,280
Speaker 2: We haven't reached the roller coaster dunked down.

705
00:32:49,360 --> 00:32:51,560
Speaker 1: Yeah. Jody Man says it's just immature. I think that

706
00:32:51,720 --> 00:32:54,800
Speaker 1: is more what I'm getting from this. Miss jay Bird

707
00:32:54,880 --> 00:32:57,880
Speaker 1: says it's definitely weird, but it's not menacing and deer

708
00:32:57,960 --> 00:33:01,960
Speaker 1: Just Statham says he's partially hit hinged, not totally unhinged

709
00:33:02,440 --> 00:33:04,640
Speaker 1: like that. I like that, Yeah, he's partially hinged. My

710
00:33:04,720 --> 00:33:06,800
Speaker 1: partner had no idea what happened until I told him

711
00:33:06,800 --> 00:33:09,040
Speaker 1: about the conversation at A Hole's place, and my friend

712
00:33:09,040 --> 00:33:11,640
Speaker 1: didn't say a word. In my defense, I typed out

713
00:33:11,680 --> 00:33:14,440
Speaker 1: exactly why this was ridiculous. Once all this came to

714
00:33:14,520 --> 00:33:17,360
Speaker 1: head and they both refused to acknowledge it. I dyed

715
00:33:17,400 --> 00:33:20,480
Speaker 1: my hair blue. That's fun my first outing with the

716
00:33:20,520 --> 00:33:22,080
Speaker 1: new hair. It was with the whole group. I went

717
00:33:22,200 --> 00:33:24,440
Speaker 1: all out on my makeup and outfit and was pretty

718
00:33:24,440 --> 00:33:27,080
Speaker 1: stoked on it. I was not exaggerating in the slightest

719
00:33:27,120 --> 00:33:29,400
Speaker 1: when I say the A Hole made twenty plus jokes

720
00:33:29,440 --> 00:33:31,480
Speaker 1: about my hair in the span of fifteen minutes. It

721
00:33:31,560 --> 00:33:34,360
Speaker 1: was pretty much every time he interacted with me, which

722
00:33:34,360 --> 00:33:35,840
Speaker 1: he seemed to go out of his way to do

723
00:33:35,920 --> 00:33:38,239
Speaker 1: specifically so he could make jokes about my hair. If

724
00:33:38,280 --> 00:33:41,200
Speaker 1: you've ever had blue hair, then you're probably heard most

725
00:33:41,240 --> 00:33:43,160
Speaker 1: of the jokes he was making. I laughed along for

726
00:33:43,240 --> 00:33:45,840
Speaker 1: the first few. I could definitely handle banter, as it's

727
00:33:45,840 --> 00:33:48,120
Speaker 1: a huge part of almost all friend groups. But after

728
00:33:48,160 --> 00:33:50,720
Speaker 1: about twenty jokes, I finally said it was getting old

729
00:33:50,840 --> 00:33:52,600
Speaker 1: and asked if he had anything nice to say. He

730
00:33:52,680 --> 00:33:55,600
Speaker 1: responded by making another five jokes with a big crap

731
00:33:55,640 --> 00:33:58,800
Speaker 1: eating grin on his face and implied I was too sensitive.

732
00:33:59,120 --> 00:34:03,280
Speaker 2: There is truly no off switch with this guy turn

733
00:34:03,320 --> 00:34:05,520
Speaker 2: off the relationship, but with him we got more.

734
00:34:05,520 --> 00:34:08,000
Speaker 1: We got more. Anyways, just wanted you all to know

735
00:34:08,120 --> 00:34:09,920
Speaker 1: I'm not crazy. The a holes literally, and he've been

736
00:34:10,000 --> 00:34:11,560
Speaker 1: trying to drive me mad for at least a year

737
00:34:11,560 --> 00:34:14,239
Speaker 1: and it worked. My partner, I've had many conversations about this,

738
00:34:14,320 --> 00:34:16,200
Speaker 1: and I know a lot of people had a lot

739
00:34:16,200 --> 00:34:19,080
Speaker 1: to say about him, but please know this was eating

740
00:34:19,080 --> 00:34:21,279
Speaker 1: both of us alive. He wanted to make things work

741
00:34:21,360 --> 00:34:23,640
Speaker 1: so badly. He wanted to at least try to salvage

742
00:34:23,680 --> 00:34:27,880
Speaker 1: their twenty plus year friendship. Twenty plus years, it's a

743
00:34:27,880 --> 00:34:31,040
Speaker 1: long time, really quick though with like even with that

744
00:34:31,160 --> 00:34:34,680
Speaker 1: last one, it's like annoying, but it's not. It's still

745
00:34:34,719 --> 00:34:38,440
Speaker 1: it's like immature, but it doesn't quite feel egregious. Yes,

746
00:34:38,719 --> 00:34:41,600
Speaker 1: with all the examples like not in history, not his

747
00:34:41,680 --> 00:34:42,640
Speaker 1: response to everything.

748
00:34:42,719 --> 00:34:45,239
Speaker 2: Yeah, if it's like we're taking this like if, but

749
00:34:45,440 --> 00:34:47,960
Speaker 2: I would say, like if he's constantly this is like

750
00:34:48,040 --> 00:34:50,960
Speaker 2: a very annoying and even if it's like this level

751
00:34:51,160 --> 00:34:54,680
Speaker 2: of annoying over and over again in outings, that's that

752
00:34:54,760 --> 00:34:57,160
Speaker 2: can reach a point to Yeah, it's a different kind of.

753
00:34:57,120 --> 00:35:00,000
Speaker 1: Thing, but I feel like it still deserves that tech

754
00:35:00,160 --> 00:35:02,759
Speaker 1: of saying like, hey, that's true. Actually, hey, like you know,

755
00:35:03,000 --> 00:35:08,560
Speaker 1: this is disrespectful. I'm I'm it makes my girlfriend uncomfortable, Like, hey,

756
00:35:08,600 --> 00:35:11,240
Speaker 1: could you could you chill out with that? Yeah, Radish says,

757
00:35:11,400 --> 00:35:14,799
Speaker 1: Now this entire dude is an off switch. Yes, dear

758
00:35:14,880 --> 00:35:18,120
Speaker 1: just Stata says, even little needling will draw blood if

759
00:35:18,160 --> 00:35:21,200
Speaker 1: it's constantly happening. Sidey Toad says, the egregious part is

760
00:35:21,320 --> 00:35:24,080
Speaker 1: it's constant. The constant poking of sun will eventually make

761
00:35:24,080 --> 00:35:26,120
Speaker 1: them snap. And this is what the butt head wanted

762
00:35:26,160 --> 00:35:29,279
Speaker 1: to prove that she was abusive, but we got a

763
00:35:29,280 --> 00:35:31,880
Speaker 1: little bit more to this. So but he understands now

764
00:35:32,000 --> 00:35:34,520
Speaker 1: that this was never possible, and he knows neither of

765
00:35:34,600 --> 00:35:37,080
Speaker 1: us deserve to be treated the way A Hole treated us.

766
00:35:37,160 --> 00:35:39,480
Speaker 1: This was never just about me. If he was good

767
00:35:39,520 --> 00:35:41,640
Speaker 1: friends to my partner, maybe things would be different and

768
00:35:41,680 --> 00:35:43,680
Speaker 1: we could have tried harder to get through to him.

769
00:35:43,719 --> 00:35:45,520
Speaker 1: But this is just who he is at the core.

770
00:35:45,640 --> 00:35:48,040
Speaker 1: He's known for being a prick for no reason and

771
00:35:48,160 --> 00:35:50,520
Speaker 1: lying about it, and there's no space in either of

772
00:35:50,560 --> 00:35:53,000
Speaker 1: our lives for that. Anyways. I doubt the A Hole

773
00:35:53,080 --> 00:35:55,880
Speaker 1: can top that message. So this is the last update

774
00:35:55,920 --> 00:35:57,960
Speaker 1: I'll give. My partner and I are coming out of

775
00:35:58,040 --> 00:36:01,760
Speaker 1: this way stronger. The A Hole has completely brainwash my friend,

776
00:36:02,040 --> 00:36:04,959
Speaker 1: and I've made my peace with it. She can have them.

777
00:36:05,000 --> 00:36:08,439
Speaker 1: God speed to them both. Thank you to all who

778
00:36:08,480 --> 00:36:11,040
Speaker 1: showed understanding. Hopefully this is all going to be behind

779
00:36:11,120 --> 00:36:14,320
Speaker 1: us very soon once the dust settles, and we do

780
00:36:14,520 --> 00:36:17,839
Speaker 1: have one final update from OPI in a response to

781
00:36:17,880 --> 00:36:20,320
Speaker 1: a comment that I will read in a sect. I

782
00:36:20,360 --> 00:36:24,400
Speaker 1: think it's a little enlightening, But John, any closing thoughts

783
00:36:24,480 --> 00:36:27,040
Speaker 1: on this this reverse update.

784
00:36:27,280 --> 00:36:31,560
Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean again knowing what happens after the reverse update. Like,

785
00:36:32,000 --> 00:36:34,239
Speaker 2: I think they handled it super well in terms of

786
00:36:34,400 --> 00:36:37,719
Speaker 2: communicating exactly what needed to be what needed to be communicated,

787
00:36:37,880 --> 00:36:40,799
Speaker 2: not going not trying to be harsh or like mean

788
00:36:40,960 --> 00:36:43,440
Speaker 2: or overly critical, whatever you want to call it. Kudos

789
00:36:43,440 --> 00:36:46,600
Speaker 2: to Opie's partner for like standing up and like making

790
00:36:46,840 --> 00:36:49,080
Speaker 2: kind of doing a one eighty and getting back an

791
00:36:49,080 --> 00:36:52,600
Speaker 2: Opie's corner. And the dude basically all throughout the story,

792
00:36:52,840 --> 00:36:56,360
Speaker 2: this guy, the fiance's friend, has just proved over and

793
00:36:56,400 --> 00:36:58,680
Speaker 2: over and over and over again. It's like, why do

794
00:36:58,719 --> 00:37:01,680
Speaker 2: we have any relationship? He just gets worse speatedly, he

795
00:37:01,760 --> 00:37:02,399
Speaker 2: just gets worse.

796
00:37:02,480 --> 00:37:03,239
Speaker 1: He just gets worse.

797
00:37:03,320 --> 00:37:06,600
Speaker 2: So it's like, let's cut our losses here, stop engaging

798
00:37:06,640 --> 00:37:08,920
Speaker 2: with him. We've already told him why move on?

799
00:37:09,239 --> 00:37:12,200
Speaker 1: Yeah, And I think maybe this could be a little

800
00:37:12,360 --> 00:37:15,799
Speaker 1: issue of jealousy potentially, Like if they have a twenty

801
00:37:15,800 --> 00:37:18,560
Speaker 1: plus year friendship and he sees his friend being taken away,

802
00:37:18,719 --> 00:37:20,799
Speaker 1: it could be an issue of like, I don't want

803
00:37:20,840 --> 00:37:24,200
Speaker 1: to lose my friend, and so I'm trying to stabilize

804
00:37:24,640 --> 00:37:28,840
Speaker 1: my my my perceived pecking order within Yeah, friends and

805
00:37:28,880 --> 00:37:30,120
Speaker 1: who's closest to this part.

806
00:37:29,920 --> 00:37:33,799
Speaker 2: And funnily enough, their childhood friends. It's almost like it's

807
00:37:33,800 --> 00:37:35,960
Speaker 2: a it's a regressive thing of like I'm going to

808
00:37:36,000 --> 00:37:37,840
Speaker 2: go back to the eight I'm going to act the

809
00:37:37,880 --> 00:37:40,440
Speaker 2: age I was when I built this friendship with the

810
00:37:41,200 --> 00:37:44,719
Speaker 2: op's fiance and act like that, you know, with the

811
00:37:44,840 --> 00:37:49,000
Speaker 2: taunting and everything else is like so.

812
00:37:47,800 --> 00:37:51,359
Speaker 1: So childish, and like there is a like a psychological

813
00:37:51,400 --> 00:37:54,440
Speaker 1: phenomenon where like, and this happens a lot when people

814
00:37:54,480 --> 00:37:57,600
Speaker 1: go visit home. We revert to who you are when

815
00:37:57,640 --> 00:37:59,640
Speaker 1: you were in that environment. So like, let's say you

816
00:37:59,760 --> 00:38:02,760
Speaker 1: left home when I don't know, you're in college or whatever,

817
00:38:02,920 --> 00:38:05,799
Speaker 1: like seventeen eighteen. You go back home and you are

818
00:38:05,840 --> 00:38:08,280
Speaker 1: the version of yourself that you were at seventeen eighteen,

819
00:38:08,400 --> 00:38:11,520
Speaker 1: or like you know, mom with the dishes or whatever whatever.

820
00:38:11,680 --> 00:38:14,040
Speaker 1: You know, you're not doing your freaking laundry. Sudden later,

821
00:38:14,120 --> 00:38:14,920
Speaker 1: like what the heck happened?

822
00:38:15,080 --> 00:38:17,279
Speaker 3: Have a sudden urge to chop a tree down?

823
00:38:17,480 --> 00:38:20,719
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, everyone don't know why. I thought, Yeah, you

824
00:38:21,160 --> 00:38:23,440
Speaker 2: guys feel that way too, right all the time. Of

825
00:38:23,440 --> 00:38:25,359
Speaker 2: course everyone does.

826
00:38:25,640 --> 00:38:28,160
Speaker 1: But we got a update in the form of a

827
00:38:28,239 --> 00:38:32,560
Speaker 1: response to this comment okay from Opete so Za four

828
00:38:32,600 --> 00:38:34,920
Speaker 1: AJ says, it all sounds like he was jealous of

829
00:38:34,960 --> 00:38:37,200
Speaker 1: you and was threatened by your relationship with your fiance.

830
00:38:37,440 --> 00:38:39,560
Speaker 1: He probably felt that you were taking his best friend

831
00:38:39,600 --> 00:38:41,920
Speaker 1: away from him. Just a quick question, did you date

832
00:38:41,960 --> 00:38:46,080
Speaker 1: your fiance before or after your ex best friends started dating?

833
00:38:46,239 --> 00:38:49,319
Speaker 1: It's just that if they started after you, he could

834
00:38:49,320 --> 00:38:51,800
Speaker 1: have done it to punish you and take her away

835
00:38:51,800 --> 00:38:54,760
Speaker 1: from you and slash or to make sure he stayed

836
00:38:54,760 --> 00:38:58,160
Speaker 1: close to your fiance. Also, did ever cross your minds

837
00:38:58,160 --> 00:39:01,399
Speaker 1: that your boyfriend's ex best friend was in love with him?

838
00:39:01,760 --> 00:39:04,600
Speaker 1: Because his behavior sounds addicative of a jealous ex lover.

839
00:39:04,920 --> 00:39:07,120
Speaker 1: I'm not saying that your fiance was in love with

840
00:39:07,239 --> 00:39:09,960
Speaker 1: him or even did anything with him, only that his

841
00:39:10,080 --> 00:39:12,920
Speaker 1: ex best friend's feelings could have been one sided and

842
00:39:13,000 --> 00:39:15,480
Speaker 1: not known to your fiance anyway. I hope you, too,

843
00:39:15,480 --> 00:39:18,360
Speaker 1: can concentrate on your wedding now that the toxic people

844
00:39:18,480 --> 00:39:20,120
Speaker 1: are out of your life and that you both have

845
00:39:20,160 --> 00:39:23,680
Speaker 1: a wonderful future together in a beautiful, unforgettable wedding. Update

846
00:39:23,680 --> 00:39:26,520
Speaker 1: me for toxic ex best friends do anything else, but

847
00:39:26,560 --> 00:39:29,680
Speaker 1: I honestly hope that they don't. And OPI has a response,

848
00:39:29,920 --> 00:39:33,520
Speaker 1: the A hole met my friend through me, And truly

849
00:39:33,800 --> 00:39:35,800
Speaker 1: I don't think he was in love with my partner.

850
00:39:35,920 --> 00:39:39,880
Speaker 1: He just loved to control him. He tries to control

851
00:39:40,000 --> 00:39:43,560
Speaker 1: everyone around him. There you go, and that is the

852
00:39:43,640 --> 00:39:44,480
Speaker 1: end of that story.

853
00:39:44,560 --> 00:39:47,000
Speaker 2: It all makes sense. But again, like going back to

854
00:39:47,080 --> 00:39:50,600
Speaker 2: the before, the reverse update. Great great ultimate ending.

855
00:39:50,520 --> 00:39:52,680
Speaker 1: Great ultimate ending. You cut out the toxic people in

856
00:39:52,719 --> 00:39:55,160
Speaker 1: your life and you're stronger than ever. I mean, that's

857
00:39:55,160 --> 00:39:56,799
Speaker 1: as good as we could we could have it be.

858
00:39:56,920 --> 00:39:59,280
Speaker 1: I'll take it. I'm happy again. I'm happy. I'm happy.

859
00:39:59,400 --> 00:40:02,040
Speaker 1: Good navigate, Briley. What are we at time wise?

860
00:40:02,640 --> 00:40:04,520
Speaker 3: We are a little short, but I got a story.

861
00:40:04,600 --> 00:40:06,800
Speaker 3: I am lining up for you guys. We've got a

862
00:40:06,840 --> 00:40:07,479
Speaker 3: donut right.

863
00:40:07,360 --> 00:40:10,640
Speaker 1: Here, sweet donation from not a Cacte. Thanks for the

864
00:40:10,680 --> 00:40:13,680
Speaker 1: five bucks. Dakota eats one sweet on stream and now

865
00:40:13,680 --> 00:40:16,440
Speaker 1: it's just free for all, it seems. I love you guys. Yeah,

866
00:40:16,480 --> 00:40:18,640
Speaker 1: we are stream eaters. We try not to be, but

867
00:40:18,960 --> 00:40:22,319
Speaker 1: we get hungry. We're like, we're just like normal people.

868
00:40:22,360 --> 00:40:23,000
Speaker 2: We're just like you.

869
00:40:23,160 --> 00:40:23,759
Speaker 1: We're just like you.

870
00:40:23,880 --> 00:40:26,200
Speaker 2: We have the hunger. We need to satisfy the hunger.

871
00:40:26,239 --> 00:40:28,680
Speaker 1: We put we put our butler puts on one pant

872
00:40:28,719 --> 00:40:29,319
Speaker 1: leg at a time.

873
00:40:29,440 --> 00:40:34,399
Speaker 2: That's right, exactly mine puts on three.

874
00:40:34,719 --> 00:40:38,120
Speaker 3: Oh dang, dang it. We walked right into got.

875
00:40:37,920 --> 00:40:38,440
Speaker 2: Them here.

876
00:40:39,840 --> 00:40:42,719
Speaker 1: In that thing glithering around. Never know you never know.

877
00:40:43,280 --> 00:40:44,760
Speaker 3: I got it in the queue.

878
00:40:44,760 --> 00:40:46,719
Speaker 2: If you guys, I got you. I think I got

879
00:40:46,719 --> 00:40:49,080
Speaker 2: it right here. Actually I'm ready fire away, brother.

880
00:40:49,400 --> 00:40:49,960
Speaker 1: Let's know it.

881
00:40:50,400 --> 00:40:52,440
Speaker 3: I made this title, so let me know of There

882
00:40:52,480 --> 00:40:53,680
Speaker 3: he goes, There we go.

883
00:40:55,480 --> 00:40:56,440
Speaker 2: Thanks Mark Riley