1 00:00:02,720 --> 00:00:05,880 Speaker 1: Hi. This is Laura Vandercamp. I'm a mother of five, 2 00:00:06,160 --> 00:00:10,200 Speaker 1: an author, journalist, and speaker. And this is Sarah Hart Hunger. 3 00:00:10,480 --> 00:00:13,480 Speaker 1: I'm a mother of three, a practicing physician and blogger. 4 00:00:13,480 --> 00:00:15,800 Speaker 1: On the side, we are two working parents who love 5 00:00:15,840 --> 00:00:19,320 Speaker 1: our careers and our families. Welcome to best of both worlds. 6 00:00:19,600 --> 00:00:22,400 Speaker 1: Here we talk about how real women manage work, family, 7 00:00:22,560 --> 00:00:25,800 Speaker 1: and time for fun, from figuring out childcare to mapping 8 00:00:25,800 --> 00:00:28,360 Speaker 1: out long term career goals. We want you to get 9 00:00:28,360 --> 00:00:34,040 Speaker 1: the most out of life. Welcome to best of both worlds. 10 00:00:34,159 --> 00:00:37,120 Speaker 1: This is Laura. This is episode two hundred and seventy, 11 00:00:37,159 --> 00:00:40,599 Speaker 1: airing in early October of twenty twenty two. Today You're 12 00:00:40,640 --> 00:00:44,839 Speaker 1: going to be talking all things tranquility by Tuesday. I'm 13 00:00:44,880 --> 00:00:47,199 Speaker 1: so excited about this. I feel like every month I've 14 00:00:47,240 --> 00:00:49,199 Speaker 1: been asking you, is it time to do the t 15 00:00:49,520 --> 00:00:52,879 Speaker 1: DVT episode yet, Like I've been really excited about it 16 00:00:52,920 --> 00:00:55,760 Speaker 1: ever since I read the book, and I you know, 17 00:00:55,840 --> 00:00:58,200 Speaker 1: I always like your writing. It's how I found you 18 00:00:58,280 --> 00:01:01,040 Speaker 1: in the first place. And I just think this is 19 00:01:01,040 --> 00:01:03,720 Speaker 1: such a wonderful one and I'm excited we finally get 20 00:01:03,720 --> 00:01:07,120 Speaker 1: to chat about it. Yay, yay, No, I'm happy to 21 00:01:07,160 --> 00:01:09,200 Speaker 1: talk about it too. Obviously, I'm talking about it a 22 00:01:09,200 --> 00:01:13,399 Speaker 1: lot various different to other podcasts and blogging about it 23 00:01:13,440 --> 00:01:16,960 Speaker 1: and doing articles for places and interviews for places. But 24 00:01:17,200 --> 00:01:18,640 Speaker 1: you know, it was a fun book to write. I 25 00:01:18,680 --> 00:01:21,959 Speaker 1: really enjoyed doing this. I mean, I love the idea 26 00:01:22,000 --> 00:01:25,640 Speaker 1: of people being able to spend their time both well 27 00:01:25,720 --> 00:01:29,520 Speaker 1: and in ways that make them happy. So we thought 28 00:01:29,520 --> 00:01:31,680 Speaker 1: we're going to talk about it, and we're talking about 29 00:01:31,720 --> 00:01:34,600 Speaker 1: it a week early. It is out next week. But 30 00:01:34,760 --> 00:01:38,600 Speaker 1: there is a reason for this, Yes, So let's talk 31 00:01:38,640 --> 00:01:41,920 Speaker 1: a little bit about you know, I follow a number 32 00:01:41,959 --> 00:01:45,520 Speaker 1: of authors and there's always a discussion of pre orders, 33 00:01:45,560 --> 00:01:48,480 Speaker 1: and they've become somewhat of a big thing in recent years. 34 00:01:49,080 --> 00:01:51,520 Speaker 1: And you can elaborate on this, but I've come to 35 00:01:51,640 --> 00:01:54,800 Speaker 1: understand that pre orders really drive the success of a 36 00:01:54,840 --> 00:01:57,200 Speaker 1: book for a lot of people. And so if you 37 00:01:57,320 --> 00:01:59,280 Speaker 1: really want to support an author and you know you're 38 00:01:59,280 --> 00:02:02,320 Speaker 1: going to by their book anyway, doing it as a 39 00:02:02,360 --> 00:02:04,880 Speaker 1: pre order is like something really really nice you can 40 00:02:04,920 --> 00:02:07,000 Speaker 1: do for them that will kind of help that book 41 00:02:07,000 --> 00:02:10,280 Speaker 1: be distributed more widely in the long term. Yeah, Basically, 42 00:02:10,400 --> 00:02:14,040 Speaker 1: it shows both the publisher who is determining in this 43 00:02:14,200 --> 00:02:17,280 Speaker 1: window how many copies to print. I mean, they have 44 00:02:17,320 --> 00:02:22,000 Speaker 1: an idea, but it will influence that. It influences how 45 00:02:22,040 --> 00:02:25,560 Speaker 1: many copies retailers order, because if they can see that 46 00:02:25,600 --> 00:02:28,200 Speaker 1: they're already going to sell out of their first lot, 47 00:02:28,800 --> 00:02:31,560 Speaker 1: then of course they will reap right, that's what they do. 48 00:02:31,919 --> 00:02:34,799 Speaker 1: So it influences how many orders get placed, and that's 49 00:02:34,840 --> 00:02:36,600 Speaker 1: how many you know, you can sell. Like there's a 50 00:02:36,600 --> 00:02:39,800 Speaker 1: physical book for many of these. Obviously people do ebooks 51 00:02:39,840 --> 00:02:42,359 Speaker 1: and audiobooks too, and so the physical aspect is slightly 52 00:02:42,440 --> 00:02:45,200 Speaker 1: less important there, but it influences it as well because 53 00:02:45,240 --> 00:02:48,120 Speaker 1: it shows everybody that demand for this book is strong, 54 00:02:48,200 --> 00:02:50,640 Speaker 1: that people are reading this book or talking about this book, 55 00:02:50,680 --> 00:02:53,760 Speaker 1: so it gets displayed more prominently, it gets more attention 56 00:02:53,960 --> 00:02:57,000 Speaker 1: from the retailers and how they market it and things 57 00:02:57,080 --> 00:03:01,480 Speaker 1: like that. So you know, it's just if you have 58 00:03:01,639 --> 00:03:05,280 Speaker 1: been listening to me, if you've been listening to Sarah 59 00:03:05,360 --> 00:03:07,760 Speaker 1: and us talking about time topics, and think that you 60 00:03:07,840 --> 00:03:10,440 Speaker 1: would be interested in Tranquility by Tuesday, I really appreciate 61 00:03:10,520 --> 00:03:12,480 Speaker 1: that if you would check it out. I have a 62 00:03:12,520 --> 00:03:16,400 Speaker 1: few pre order bonuses. You can get an excerpt so 63 00:03:16,440 --> 00:03:18,680 Speaker 1: you can go ahead and start reading. There's a scorecard. 64 00:03:19,080 --> 00:03:22,000 Speaker 1: You'll get early access to the tranquility by Tuesday. In 65 00:03:22,040 --> 00:03:25,240 Speaker 1: real life videos, I did a couple time makeover videos 66 00:03:25,240 --> 00:03:28,040 Speaker 1: with some listeners slash readers, So that was pretty fun. 67 00:03:28,919 --> 00:03:31,200 Speaker 1: That is I love. I saw a little previews snippet 68 00:03:31,240 --> 00:03:33,560 Speaker 1: of the videos, and I am it's like delightful to 69 00:03:33,600 --> 00:03:36,520 Speaker 1: see people I actually kind of know about, either through 70 00:03:36,560 --> 00:03:40,080 Speaker 1: like the podcast or the blogging world participate in that. 71 00:03:40,160 --> 00:03:42,240 Speaker 1: So there's some like fun easter eggs in there for 72 00:03:42,360 --> 00:03:45,240 Speaker 1: listeners who have kind of been paying attention all these years. 73 00:03:45,560 --> 00:03:47,760 Speaker 1: And I got to say, like this book, as always, 74 00:03:47,800 --> 00:03:51,680 Speaker 1: it's super cleanly written, like Laura's writing is never it's 75 00:03:51,720 --> 00:03:54,040 Speaker 1: usually very succinct, and there's a lot. You get a 76 00:03:54,080 --> 00:03:56,200 Speaker 1: lot out of it for however many pages there are, 77 00:03:56,560 --> 00:03:59,280 Speaker 1: and this one is very very actionable. I feel like 78 00:03:59,840 --> 00:04:01,880 Speaker 1: I've enjoyed both types of books you've written, but like 79 00:04:01,920 --> 00:04:04,280 Speaker 1: Off the Clock felt more theoretical and thoughtful, and this 80 00:04:04,280 --> 00:04:06,200 Speaker 1: one feels more like no, no no when you read it, 81 00:04:06,280 --> 00:04:08,040 Speaker 1: like you're going to have things that you can act 82 00:04:08,080 --> 00:04:10,560 Speaker 1: on right away, or perhaps things that you could do 83 00:04:10,640 --> 00:04:13,120 Speaker 1: with friends, like this would be a really cool club 84 00:04:13,200 --> 00:04:14,960 Speaker 1: kind of book to read together and then maybe put 85 00:04:15,000 --> 00:04:16,960 Speaker 1: some of the tips into action together and see how 86 00:04:16,960 --> 00:04:20,000 Speaker 1: it works. Yeah, I have a discussion guide that should 87 00:04:20,040 --> 00:04:21,599 Speaker 1: be out by now that people will be able to 88 00:04:21,680 --> 00:04:24,000 Speaker 1: access that. You can do it in a one meeting 89 00:04:24,120 --> 00:04:27,440 Speaker 1: tranquility by Tuesday book club kind of thing. Or you 90 00:04:27,480 --> 00:04:30,920 Speaker 1: can do nine Rules nine Weeks, which is a nine 91 00:04:30,920 --> 00:04:32,680 Speaker 1: week program you could do with a couple of friends 92 00:04:32,680 --> 00:04:35,480 Speaker 1: reading the book together, putting the rules into place together, 93 00:04:35,839 --> 00:04:39,160 Speaker 1: holding each other accountable. So yeah, if you guys are 94 00:04:39,200 --> 00:04:41,920 Speaker 1: willing to check out the book, I would really appreciate it. 95 00:04:42,400 --> 00:04:45,760 Speaker 1: Just as a note here, I mean sometimes you're like, well, 96 00:04:45,839 --> 00:04:48,719 Speaker 1: what does one copy of a book matter? It actually 97 00:04:48,720 --> 00:04:52,200 Speaker 1: really does. I mean, just as some numbers here for you. 98 00:04:52,600 --> 00:04:57,599 Speaker 1: There are about eighteen thousand people downloading this podcast every week, 99 00:04:58,240 --> 00:05:02,279 Speaker 1: and if a order of the people who are downloading 100 00:05:02,320 --> 00:05:05,840 Speaker 1: and listening to this podcast pre ordered the book, that 101 00:05:05,839 --> 00:05:08,560 Speaker 1: would on its own put it on several of the 102 00:05:08,600 --> 00:05:12,200 Speaker 1: bestseller lists. It's just you don't have to sell that 103 00:05:12,320 --> 00:05:14,560 Speaker 1: many copies. I mean, unless you happen to come out 104 00:05:14,600 --> 00:05:18,480 Speaker 1: in a week when like Michelle Obama and James Patterson 105 00:05:18,520 --> 00:05:20,760 Speaker 1: and JK. Rowling, like whatever, I was a big if 106 00:05:20,760 --> 00:05:22,400 Speaker 1: everyone had a book out that week. That would be 107 00:05:22,400 --> 00:05:25,600 Speaker 1: a problem because then the you know, the numbers needed 108 00:05:25,640 --> 00:05:28,360 Speaker 1: to break through anything would be much higher. But most 109 00:05:28,400 --> 00:05:31,360 Speaker 1: of the time that's not the case. People, They're just 110 00:05:31,560 --> 00:05:33,240 Speaker 1: people don't buy that many books. I guess is what 111 00:05:33,279 --> 00:05:36,559 Speaker 1: I say that a couple of thousand orders really do matter. 112 00:05:36,680 --> 00:05:39,320 Speaker 1: So just as a favorite to me, if you enjoy 113 00:05:39,400 --> 00:05:42,159 Speaker 1: this podcast, I would really appreciate it. I have just 114 00:05:42,200 --> 00:05:43,919 Speaker 1: made the decision I will have to pre order some 115 00:05:44,040 --> 00:05:48,560 Speaker 1: for my book club distribution distribute to the neighbors. Basically, well, 116 00:05:48,800 --> 00:05:51,480 Speaker 1: I could dial in for that meeting. That would be fun, Yes, 117 00:05:51,680 --> 00:05:54,599 Speaker 1: that would be awesome. Anyway, Yeah, we could go ahead 118 00:05:54,600 --> 00:05:56,320 Speaker 1: and talk about the topics in the book now that 119 00:05:56,360 --> 00:05:59,719 Speaker 1: we've done the sales pitch. But yay, So tell me 120 00:05:59,760 --> 00:06:01,720 Speaker 1: a little bit about, like, I feel like you were 121 00:06:01,760 --> 00:06:05,760 Speaker 1: thinking about this topic several years ago, and actually the 122 00:06:05,760 --> 00:06:08,440 Speaker 1: phrase tranquility by Tuesday showed up on your blog all 123 00:06:08,440 --> 00:06:11,160 Speaker 1: the way back in twenty nineteen. So tell a little 124 00:06:11,200 --> 00:06:13,279 Speaker 1: bit about how, like, how did this take shape and 125 00:06:13,279 --> 00:06:15,440 Speaker 1: how did it take that book form? Yeah, so I 126 00:06:15,440 --> 00:06:17,640 Speaker 1: had been casting about you know, what, what do I 127 00:06:17,640 --> 00:06:21,400 Speaker 1: want to write about next? I've written many time management books. 128 00:06:21,440 --> 00:06:23,320 Speaker 1: You always need a new angle if you're going to 129 00:06:23,360 --> 00:06:26,320 Speaker 1: put something out in front of readers, and so maybe 130 00:06:26,320 --> 00:06:30,119 Speaker 1: some longtime blog readers might remember that in the fall 131 00:06:30,160 --> 00:06:33,839 Speaker 1: of twenty nineteen, I did a series of time makeovers 132 00:06:33,920 --> 00:06:36,359 Speaker 1: on my blog. So I put out to my list 133 00:06:36,440 --> 00:06:38,120 Speaker 1: that I was willing to do these. If people track 134 00:06:38,200 --> 00:06:40,760 Speaker 1: their time for a week, sent me, you know, questions, 135 00:06:40,800 --> 00:06:43,440 Speaker 1: what they thought, you know, their problems were, we would talk. 136 00:06:43,600 --> 00:06:46,360 Speaker 1: I would run these on the blog, and so over 137 00:06:46,400 --> 00:06:48,520 Speaker 1: the course of a couple months in the fall of 138 00:06:48,560 --> 00:06:53,599 Speaker 1: twenty nineteen, I ran several time makeovers, and what I 139 00:06:53,600 --> 00:06:56,080 Speaker 1: got out of these is I was, you know, honing 140 00:06:56,120 --> 00:07:01,240 Speaker 1: my advice down to a handful of things that were 141 00:07:01,440 --> 00:07:04,360 Speaker 1: useful broadly, like, I wanted to see if people have 142 00:07:04,440 --> 00:07:07,480 Speaker 1: different lives, if people are in different stages of life, 143 00:07:07,800 --> 00:07:12,280 Speaker 1: what advice seems to work most frequently. And so then 144 00:07:12,560 --> 00:07:17,560 Speaker 1: I honed this down to nine rules and tranquility by Tuesday. 145 00:07:17,560 --> 00:07:20,640 Speaker 1: The idea is, well, let me test out these nine rules. 146 00:07:20,880 --> 00:07:23,520 Speaker 1: Let me see if I do put people through the 147 00:07:23,560 --> 00:07:27,040 Speaker 1: paces to learn these rules, will it change their lives? 148 00:07:27,080 --> 00:07:29,360 Speaker 1: How will it change how they spend their time? And 149 00:07:29,400 --> 00:07:32,440 Speaker 1: so that is you know, how this book came to 150 00:07:32,480 --> 00:07:35,800 Speaker 1: be and is the Tuesday. Because the idea is that 151 00:07:35,840 --> 00:07:39,120 Speaker 1: these rules, when put into place, it doesn't necessarily you're 152 00:07:39,120 --> 00:07:41,480 Speaker 1: not trying to reach some specific place. It's just supposed 153 00:07:41,520 --> 00:07:45,560 Speaker 1: to enhance your everyday experience, your Tuesdays, your Tuesdays. I mean, 154 00:07:45,600 --> 00:07:48,560 Speaker 1: Tuesday is the most normal day of the week, right, 155 00:07:48,960 --> 00:07:52,160 Speaker 1: Mondays have their own baggage, people like, oh fun Fridays 156 00:07:52,400 --> 00:07:56,760 Speaker 1: or you know, Saturdays, Sundays sort of different, but Tuesday 157 00:07:56,920 --> 00:07:59,840 Speaker 1: is like the normal day. So if you can change 158 00:08:00,000 --> 00:08:03,640 Speaker 1: how you spend your time on a normal Tuesday, you 159 00:08:03,760 --> 00:08:09,280 Speaker 1: have upgraded your life in a significant but doable way. Right. 160 00:08:09,320 --> 00:08:12,600 Speaker 1: We're not talking about waiting for vacations. We're not talking 161 00:08:12,640 --> 00:08:16,480 Speaker 1: about sometime in the far future when life is less hectic. 162 00:08:16,480 --> 00:08:18,600 Speaker 1: It's like, no, no, what can we do in the 163 00:08:18,640 --> 00:08:23,280 Speaker 1: midst of our complex and occasually chaotic lives to actually 164 00:08:23,480 --> 00:08:26,160 Speaker 1: enjoy our time to feel like we have enough energy 165 00:08:26,200 --> 00:08:29,920 Speaker 1: to handle our responsibilities, to feel that even on an 166 00:08:29,960 --> 00:08:34,319 Speaker 1: average Tuesday, you have something to look forward to. I 167 00:08:34,360 --> 00:08:36,680 Speaker 1: love it all. Right, Well, talk about how the project 168 00:08:36,720 --> 00:08:40,040 Speaker 1: itself worked because you actually did some like real life 169 00:08:40,040 --> 00:08:43,040 Speaker 1: field work slash research here. Yeah, so, I mean part 170 00:08:43,040 --> 00:08:45,160 Speaker 1: of writing self help for busy people is that I 171 00:08:45,200 --> 00:08:48,680 Speaker 1: really don't want to waste anyone's time, which is that 172 00:08:48,960 --> 00:08:50,760 Speaker 1: you know, a couple ideas that I think are kind 173 00:08:50,760 --> 00:08:53,360 Speaker 1: of cool might be nice, but I would really prefer 174 00:08:53,400 --> 00:08:56,640 Speaker 1: to see that they do in fact work. So I 175 00:08:56,679 --> 00:09:00,560 Speaker 1: did two studies. In fact, the first was a pilot 176 00:09:00,640 --> 00:09:04,080 Speaker 1: version of Tranquility by Tuesday that I had. It was 177 00:09:04,120 --> 00:09:06,920 Speaker 1: just a few dozen people try out the rules over 178 00:09:06,920 --> 00:09:09,640 Speaker 1: the course of nine weeks. And this allowed me to 179 00:09:09,640 --> 00:09:11,800 Speaker 1: do a few things. I mean, one, I could refine 180 00:09:12,200 --> 00:09:15,040 Speaker 1: the rules themselves, you know, see what people reacted to, 181 00:09:15,080 --> 00:09:17,880 Speaker 1: what they didn't. I could see, you know, were my 182 00:09:17,960 --> 00:09:22,200 Speaker 1: instructions clear. I worked with somebody who has a PhD 183 00:09:22,280 --> 00:09:25,040 Speaker 1: in survey design, by the way, to come up with 184 00:09:25,080 --> 00:09:27,080 Speaker 1: this survey. So she and I were working together. In 185 00:09:27,080 --> 00:09:29,760 Speaker 1: the course of doing the pilot, we could see like 186 00:09:30,040 --> 00:09:32,960 Speaker 1: do people not respond to this question? Like does this 187 00:09:33,040 --> 00:09:36,920 Speaker 1: question get no answers because everyone finds it confusing? Should 188 00:09:36,920 --> 00:09:38,920 Speaker 1: we ask this in a different way to make it 189 00:09:39,000 --> 00:09:41,600 Speaker 1: more clear? Are there too many questions right so people 190 00:09:41,640 --> 00:09:44,920 Speaker 1: stop answering them somewhere in the middle. So just all 191 00:09:44,920 --> 00:09:47,559 Speaker 1: these things that we could tweak because we were running 192 00:09:47,600 --> 00:09:50,640 Speaker 1: through the whole project one time. First, I also wanted 193 00:09:50,640 --> 00:09:53,120 Speaker 1: to make sure that I would get statistically significant data, 194 00:09:53,920 --> 00:09:57,600 Speaker 1: because if like nothing happened over nine weeks with these 195 00:09:57,640 --> 00:10:01,200 Speaker 1: people at their time satisfaction scores weren't rising, that would 196 00:10:01,200 --> 00:10:04,080 Speaker 1: be a problem. So what I mean by time satisfaction 197 00:10:04,160 --> 00:10:07,240 Speaker 1: scores is I had a list of you know, it's 198 00:10:07,280 --> 00:10:10,640 Speaker 1: about thirteen questions for my scale, but questions like you know, 199 00:10:10,760 --> 00:10:14,240 Speaker 1: yesterday I had enough energy to handle my responsibilities, or 200 00:10:14,520 --> 00:10:17,880 Speaker 1: I regularly have time just for me generally I'm making 201 00:10:17,960 --> 00:10:22,200 Speaker 1: progress on my professional goals. Those sorts of questions, and 202 00:10:22,240 --> 00:10:25,160 Speaker 1: then you could answer one to seven on how much 203 00:10:25,160 --> 00:10:28,560 Speaker 1: you agreed with it. So one was strongly disagree, seven 204 00:10:28,640 --> 00:10:30,840 Speaker 1: is strongly agree. And so the idea is to turn 205 00:10:30,960 --> 00:10:34,560 Speaker 1: sentiments into numbers. And I kept doing that in the 206 00:10:34,559 --> 00:10:38,760 Speaker 1: course of the study, and yeah, you know, we see 207 00:10:38,760 --> 00:10:42,080 Speaker 1: if we got results. Did people's time satisfaction scores rise? 208 00:10:42,520 --> 00:10:45,800 Speaker 1: And they did in the pilot. So then I went 209 00:10:46,000 --> 00:10:49,000 Speaker 1: and did it again with a much bigger group, this 210 00:10:49,080 --> 00:10:51,600 Speaker 1: time with about one hundred and fifty people. Wound up 211 00:10:51,600 --> 00:10:55,880 Speaker 1: doing the whole project and looked at not only the 212 00:10:56,600 --> 00:11:00,760 Speaker 1: quantitative results but also what people answered for the questions, 213 00:11:00,760 --> 00:11:04,960 Speaker 1: and so the bulk of the book is actually people's responses, 214 00:11:05,400 --> 00:11:08,280 Speaker 1: right that. You know, if I have them try out 215 00:11:08,480 --> 00:11:12,640 Speaker 1: one of the nine rules and see what happened, they 216 00:11:12,679 --> 00:11:17,360 Speaker 1: describe the challenges they face, they describe the results they saw, 217 00:11:18,200 --> 00:11:20,920 Speaker 1: and that's you know, what the book mostly is is 218 00:11:20,960 --> 00:11:24,440 Speaker 1: real people talking about how these rules work in real life. 219 00:11:25,080 --> 00:11:27,160 Speaker 1: And that's what makes it to me both a very 220 00:11:27,200 --> 00:11:30,359 Speaker 1: fun and practical read because you have like the scientific, 221 00:11:30,440 --> 00:11:33,440 Speaker 1: actual results of what worked overall, but then it's like 222 00:11:33,520 --> 00:11:36,080 Speaker 1: tied in with personal vignettes that makes it completely not 223 00:11:36,200 --> 00:11:39,640 Speaker 1: dry and fun to experience. I have to ask, was 224 00:11:39,679 --> 00:11:42,120 Speaker 1: this the first time you did your own original study 225 00:11:42,280 --> 00:11:43,800 Speaker 1: for a book, because I know you did, like a 226 00:11:43,840 --> 00:11:47,040 Speaker 1: lot of time youse time used data number crunching for 227 00:11:47,120 --> 00:11:49,280 Speaker 1: prior books, But was this the first time it was 228 00:11:49,280 --> 00:11:51,840 Speaker 1: your own data set? Well, I mean, for I know 229 00:11:51,880 --> 00:11:54,960 Speaker 1: how she does it. I collected the data set for thousand, 230 00:11:55,280 --> 00:11:57,360 Speaker 1: one thousand and one days in the lives of women 231 00:11:57,440 --> 00:12:00,559 Speaker 1: with you know, professional jobs and children. That was a 232 00:12:00,679 --> 00:12:04,240 Speaker 1: data set collection too, And I've always had researchers work 233 00:12:04,240 --> 00:12:07,040 Speaker 1: with me to do some of the more intense number crunching. 234 00:12:07,520 --> 00:12:10,520 Speaker 1: I have an understanding of it. But I'm not quite 235 00:12:10,559 --> 00:12:13,400 Speaker 1: as into obviously as somebody with a PhD and survey design, 236 00:12:13,679 --> 00:12:16,680 Speaker 1: so I wanted to make sure that it was done rigorously. 237 00:12:16,920 --> 00:12:19,440 Speaker 1: And I'm pretty happy with our results. I think we 238 00:12:19,480 --> 00:12:22,079 Speaker 1: did a good job, so exciting. Well, we're going to 239 00:12:22,120 --> 00:12:24,600 Speaker 1: dive into those results right after our break. We will 240 00:12:24,600 --> 00:12:39,760 Speaker 1: be right back. All right, we are back, and now 241 00:12:39,760 --> 00:12:43,400 Speaker 1: that we understand how Laura put together her research for 242 00:12:43,440 --> 00:12:48,079 Speaker 1: tranquility by Tuesday, what were some of your biggest findings. Well, overall, 243 00:12:48,240 --> 00:12:52,280 Speaker 1: people's general time satisfaction, which is the compilation of this 244 00:12:52,320 --> 00:12:57,120 Speaker 1: whole thirteen question scale, rose sixteen percent over the course 245 00:12:57,320 --> 00:13:00,040 Speaker 1: of the nine weeks where they loose these rules. So 246 00:13:00,080 --> 00:13:03,240 Speaker 1: maybe sixteen percent doesn't sound huge. I mean it's not 247 00:13:03,280 --> 00:13:05,679 Speaker 1: like doubling. But as I point out, if you are 248 00:13:05,800 --> 00:13:08,920 Speaker 1: like a money manager, getting a sixteen percent return would 249 00:13:08,960 --> 00:13:13,160 Speaker 1: sound pretty good. Nothing is over the top difficult to do. 250 00:13:13,679 --> 00:13:17,440 Speaker 1: So feeling sixteen percent happier about your time is pretty cool. 251 00:13:17,480 --> 00:13:20,200 Speaker 1: And that's, you know, a very statistically significant result, I 252 00:13:20,200 --> 00:13:23,240 Speaker 1: mean very small p values, so pretty cool on that. 253 00:13:24,000 --> 00:13:27,680 Speaker 1: On the individual areas of things, for instance, people felt 254 00:13:27,679 --> 00:13:30,319 Speaker 1: significantly happier with how they spent their leisure time. One 255 00:13:30,320 --> 00:13:33,640 Speaker 1: of the questions is, yesterday I was happy with how 256 00:13:33,679 --> 00:13:36,360 Speaker 1: I spent my leisure time. Scores on that rose twenty 257 00:13:36,360 --> 00:13:39,760 Speaker 1: percent over the course of the nine weeks. A question 258 00:13:39,920 --> 00:13:43,240 Speaker 1: like yesterday I didn't waste time on things that weren't 259 00:13:43,240 --> 00:13:46,640 Speaker 1: important to me. That rose thirty two percent in the 260 00:13:46,679 --> 00:13:49,480 Speaker 1: course of the nine weeks. And it's because you know, 261 00:13:49,520 --> 00:13:52,400 Speaker 1: people were thinking about how they wanted to spend their time. 262 00:13:52,440 --> 00:13:55,680 Speaker 1: They were more aware of where the time was going, 263 00:13:55,760 --> 00:13:58,960 Speaker 1: they were more aware of making choices, they were more 264 00:13:59,080 --> 00:14:03,680 Speaker 1: aware of how even small tweaks could make sure that 265 00:14:03,840 --> 00:14:08,040 Speaker 1: more time was spent mindfully and so thus on things 266 00:14:08,120 --> 00:14:11,400 Speaker 1: that they were wanting to do. And so that was, 267 00:14:11,440 --> 00:14:14,360 Speaker 1: you know, pretty cool to see. Were there any rules 268 00:14:14,400 --> 00:14:16,719 Speaker 1: from the pilot that you ended up throwing out? I'm 269 00:14:16,760 --> 00:14:19,160 Speaker 1: sorry that was that was a totally unplanned softball, but 270 00:14:19,240 --> 00:14:22,080 Speaker 1: I just had to No. Actually, we wound up going 271 00:14:22,160 --> 00:14:25,480 Speaker 1: with those same nine rules. The things that changed were, 272 00:14:26,080 --> 00:14:29,000 Speaker 1: you know, some of the description emails. So the way 273 00:14:29,040 --> 00:14:31,480 Speaker 1: the study would work each week I would send you 274 00:14:31,920 --> 00:14:34,640 Speaker 1: after some initial questions to get demographics, to get how 275 00:14:34,640 --> 00:14:36,600 Speaker 1: people were spending their time, how they felt about their time. 276 00:14:36,640 --> 00:14:40,080 Speaker 1: Each week, I would send people an email that taught 277 00:14:40,080 --> 00:14:43,160 Speaker 1: them a rule, and then they would answer questions about 278 00:14:43,480 --> 00:14:46,360 Speaker 1: how they planned to implement it in their life, and 279 00:14:46,400 --> 00:14:49,840 Speaker 1: then questions a week later on how it went right. 280 00:14:50,280 --> 00:14:53,560 Speaker 1: And so it was mostly those questions that got changed 281 00:14:53,840 --> 00:14:56,680 Speaker 1: some of them to make it more clear if it was, 282 00:14:56,760 --> 00:14:59,560 Speaker 1: you know, people were not getting at what we thought like, 283 00:14:59,600 --> 00:15:03,000 Speaker 1: we moved some of the order around. You know, I 284 00:15:03,120 --> 00:15:06,120 Speaker 1: edited the emails I sent on the rules to make 285 00:15:06,160 --> 00:15:08,960 Speaker 1: it more clear what I was getting at, because that 286 00:15:09,040 --> 00:15:12,000 Speaker 1: would come through if people were answering in some of 287 00:15:12,040 --> 00:15:14,400 Speaker 1: the qualitative questions. Well, I wasn't quite sure what Laura 288 00:15:14,480 --> 00:15:16,400 Speaker 1: meant by this, so I tried doing this and maybe 289 00:15:16,400 --> 00:15:18,800 Speaker 1: that worked too. But if that was the case for 290 00:15:18,920 --> 00:15:21,160 Speaker 1: enough people saying something like that, then it meant I 291 00:15:21,200 --> 00:15:24,800 Speaker 1: needed to edit it. Totally makes sense, all right, Well, 292 00:15:24,840 --> 00:15:27,600 Speaker 1: let's talk about some of the individual rules. We don't 293 00:15:27,640 --> 00:15:30,160 Speaker 1: have to go through online. Well, we could, but I 294 00:15:30,200 --> 00:15:32,840 Speaker 1: wanted to talk about a couple of my favorites. So 295 00:15:34,120 --> 00:15:37,760 Speaker 1: one of them, not stockingly, is that I love planned 296 00:15:37,760 --> 00:15:40,600 Speaker 1: the week on Fridays. How did you pick Fridays? Tell 297 00:15:40,680 --> 00:15:43,240 Speaker 1: us a little bit more about this, and I guess 298 00:15:43,360 --> 00:15:45,920 Speaker 1: I wanted to ask is it okay? Well, I guess 299 00:15:45,920 --> 00:15:48,000 Speaker 1: it's okay. But my take on it is to plan 300 00:15:48,080 --> 00:15:50,760 Speaker 1: my work week on Fridays and my personal week on Sundays. 301 00:15:50,760 --> 00:15:52,800 Speaker 1: And this works for me. But you could give me 302 00:15:52,800 --> 00:15:54,880 Speaker 1: an argument why I should switch that, and maybe I'll 303 00:15:55,160 --> 00:15:57,720 Speaker 1: take it under consideration. Yeah. Well, if you have a 304 00:15:57,760 --> 00:16:00,960 Speaker 1: planning system that is working for you, don't want to 305 00:16:01,040 --> 00:16:04,880 Speaker 1: interrupt anyone's well functioning life. So I am never going 306 00:16:04,960 --> 00:16:11,000 Speaker 1: to suggest that. But so Friday is plan on Friday. 307 00:16:11,000 --> 00:16:13,200 Speaker 1: This rule, it really encompasses two things, and the first 308 00:16:13,200 --> 00:16:15,320 Speaker 1: part is to plan. That is by far the most 309 00:16:15,360 --> 00:16:20,360 Speaker 1: important part. I think everybody needs a weekly recurring planning time, 310 00:16:20,800 --> 00:16:23,480 Speaker 1: and weekly because you live your life in weeks. A 311 00:16:23,520 --> 00:16:26,400 Speaker 1: week is the unit of repeat, as a mathematician would 312 00:16:26,400 --> 00:16:29,200 Speaker 1: put it in the pattern of our lives. You know, 313 00:16:29,280 --> 00:16:32,520 Speaker 1: Tuesday is not a unit of repeat because Thursday looks 314 00:16:32,560 --> 00:16:35,720 Speaker 1: different and Saturday looks different. But Monday through Sunday tends 315 00:16:35,760 --> 00:16:39,680 Speaker 1: to look relatively like your life, and so that's what 316 00:16:39,720 --> 00:16:42,320 Speaker 1: you want to be looking at. You know, when you 317 00:16:42,440 --> 00:16:46,440 Speaker 1: have a recurring time, you get in the habit. You 318 00:16:46,520 --> 00:16:50,040 Speaker 1: also can start sending yourself notes to that time, like, oh, 319 00:16:50,080 --> 00:16:52,480 Speaker 1: I know I'm going to plan on Friday, so I'll 320 00:16:52,480 --> 00:16:54,400 Speaker 1: put a note on my calendar for that Friday to 321 00:16:54,440 --> 00:16:57,200 Speaker 1: think about this question. And that both allows you to 322 00:16:57,240 --> 00:17:00,160 Speaker 1: not think about that question until that time and to 323 00:17:00,320 --> 00:17:02,760 Speaker 1: start planning for the future. You know, even something like 324 00:17:03,360 --> 00:17:06,800 Speaker 1: you know the reservations that a famous restaurant are going 325 00:17:06,840 --> 00:17:08,520 Speaker 1: to open on a certain day, and so you want 326 00:17:08,520 --> 00:17:09,920 Speaker 1: to put it on your calendar for that next week. 327 00:17:09,960 --> 00:17:11,840 Speaker 1: Will you tell yourself that for your planning time, and 328 00:17:11,840 --> 00:17:13,720 Speaker 1: then you know, to build that window into your week. 329 00:17:13,760 --> 00:17:16,280 Speaker 1: I mean, it just allows for all sorts of things 330 00:17:17,000 --> 00:17:20,520 Speaker 1: that are you know, important, and you can start making 331 00:17:20,560 --> 00:17:22,960 Speaker 1: progress toward long term goals because every week you're thinking 332 00:17:23,000 --> 00:17:24,880 Speaker 1: about what steps am I going to build in toward 333 00:17:24,920 --> 00:17:26,720 Speaker 1: my long term goals? And then you reflect back did 334 00:17:26,720 --> 00:17:28,679 Speaker 1: I do those things? And then what are the next steps? 335 00:17:29,200 --> 00:17:34,080 Speaker 1: As for Friday. This actually came from a chat I 336 00:17:34,280 --> 00:17:38,919 Speaker 1: had with David Allen. Of all people who I had 337 00:17:38,960 --> 00:17:41,600 Speaker 1: been talking about people kind of planning on Sunday night, 338 00:17:41,640 --> 00:17:43,600 Speaker 1: and I think I had been planning on Sunday night, 339 00:17:43,960 --> 00:17:46,200 Speaker 1: and he sort of offhand mentioned that a lot of 340 00:17:46,240 --> 00:17:49,280 Speaker 1: people he knew sort of had Friday as a lighter 341 00:17:49,400 --> 00:17:51,399 Speaker 1: day and kind of did a weekly review at some 342 00:17:51,480 --> 00:17:53,840 Speaker 1: point on Friday, and he was talking more about the 343 00:17:53,880 --> 00:17:56,840 Speaker 1: retrospective review that you know David Allen always talks about. 344 00:17:56,920 --> 00:18:00,960 Speaker 1: But I was like, oh, Friday, now that's idea, And 345 00:18:01,000 --> 00:18:03,960 Speaker 1: then I realized, I think Friday is much better for 346 00:18:04,320 --> 00:18:07,680 Speaker 1: looking forward for a couple of reasons. I mean, one 347 00:18:07,720 --> 00:18:10,280 Speaker 1: Friday afternoon at least is what an economist might call 348 00:18:10,280 --> 00:18:12,919 Speaker 1: a low opportunity cost time. Most of us are not 349 00:18:12,960 --> 00:18:15,439 Speaker 1: sitting there on Friday afternoon saying I am excited to 350 00:18:15,440 --> 00:18:18,680 Speaker 1: make progress on my personal and professional goals right now, 351 00:18:19,200 --> 00:18:21,199 Speaker 1: but you know, we are willing to think maybe what 352 00:18:21,400 --> 00:18:23,280 Speaker 1: future us should be doing. So if you were just 353 00:18:23,359 --> 00:18:25,920 Speaker 1: going to waste those minutes, those hours until it was 354 00:18:25,960 --> 00:18:29,359 Speaker 1: acceptable to sign off, like you may as well repurpose them. 355 00:18:29,840 --> 00:18:32,400 Speaker 1: It allows you to use more of your work week. 356 00:18:32,800 --> 00:18:35,159 Speaker 1: Like if you don't plan until Monday morning, which is 357 00:18:35,200 --> 00:18:38,480 Speaker 1: another popular time, many of the things you're gonna do 358 00:18:38,560 --> 00:18:41,720 Speaker 1: like can't get going until either Monday afternoon or Tuesday. 359 00:18:42,080 --> 00:18:44,560 Speaker 1: And if again, people are sliding toward the weekend on Friday, 360 00:18:44,600 --> 00:18:46,840 Speaker 1: like you've only got three real workdays, then if you 361 00:18:46,960 --> 00:18:50,760 Speaker 1: are not using all of Monday for execution, so by 362 00:18:50,840 --> 00:18:53,760 Speaker 1: planning on Friday, you can use more of Monday. I 363 00:18:54,080 --> 00:18:57,560 Speaker 1: find it better than Sunday for many sorts of planning, 364 00:18:57,680 --> 00:19:01,040 Speaker 1: just because it's during business hours, and so if there 365 00:19:01,080 --> 00:19:04,680 Speaker 1: is something you need to do that requires making an appointment, 366 00:19:04,720 --> 00:19:06,800 Speaker 1: that requires setting up a meeting, like you are more 367 00:19:06,880 --> 00:19:09,840 Speaker 1: likely to be able to make that happen during Friday 368 00:19:09,880 --> 00:19:13,199 Speaker 1: business hours versus like Sunday night. But it also just 369 00:19:13,280 --> 00:19:15,760 Speaker 1: I mean, it allows you to enjoy more of your weekend. 370 00:19:15,760 --> 00:19:17,679 Speaker 1: I mean, one of the issues when people plan their 371 00:19:17,720 --> 00:19:20,959 Speaker 1: professional lives on Sunday night at least, is that you 372 00:19:22,040 --> 00:19:25,159 Speaker 1: will probably be thinking about this question of what I 373 00:19:25,200 --> 00:19:27,359 Speaker 1: need to do before that Sunday night time, because you 374 00:19:27,400 --> 00:19:29,600 Speaker 1: know there's all that stuff waiting for you Monday morning. 375 00:19:29,920 --> 00:19:31,280 Speaker 1: You don't know what it is, you don't know how 376 00:19:31,280 --> 00:19:32,919 Speaker 1: you're going to deal with it. Maybe you have a 377 00:19:32,920 --> 00:19:34,800 Speaker 1: time on Sunday night to think about it, but it 378 00:19:34,840 --> 00:19:37,399 Speaker 1: often just kind of keeps churning until then. Whereas if 379 00:19:37,440 --> 00:19:39,560 Speaker 1: you have a plan by the time you leave on Friday, 380 00:19:39,880 --> 00:19:41,719 Speaker 1: then you might be able to relax and enjoy your 381 00:19:41,720 --> 00:19:45,360 Speaker 1: weekend a little bit more. I love it. I think 382 00:19:45,400 --> 00:19:48,200 Speaker 1: I actually might try to move a little bit more 383 00:19:48,280 --> 00:19:51,480 Speaker 1: of my family type planning to Fridays, especially as my 384 00:19:51,520 --> 00:19:54,439 Speaker 1: work schedule is about to change a little bit and 385 00:19:54,480 --> 00:19:57,400 Speaker 1: I should have a little bit less administrative burden because 386 00:19:57,440 --> 00:19:59,439 Speaker 1: often I'm sort of frantically trying to empty out my 387 00:19:59,480 --> 00:20:02,119 Speaker 1: emails on Friday. But that might be less of the 388 00:20:02,160 --> 00:20:06,000 Speaker 1: struggle moving forward, So I can see the value in that, 389 00:20:06,080 --> 00:20:08,359 Speaker 1: And also just kind of having things set before you 390 00:20:08,400 --> 00:20:10,320 Speaker 1: go into the weekend so you don't feel like half 391 00:20:10,320 --> 00:20:13,239 Speaker 1: your weekend is like kind of burdened down by this, like, oh, 392 00:20:13,320 --> 00:20:14,879 Speaker 1: I have to meal plan, I have to put everything 393 00:20:14,920 --> 00:20:16,520 Speaker 1: up on the weekly board, I have to figure out 394 00:20:16,560 --> 00:20:19,159 Speaker 1: howghart et cetera, et cetera. So I can see the 395 00:20:19,200 --> 00:20:21,159 Speaker 1: value there. So maybe I will try that with my 396 00:20:21,240 --> 00:20:23,800 Speaker 1: little fresh start that I have career wise, I will 397 00:20:23,800 --> 00:20:26,400 Speaker 1: say I do some of my personal planning on Sunday 398 00:20:27,080 --> 00:20:29,760 Speaker 1: in terms of the kids activity schedule, because it's been 399 00:20:29,800 --> 00:20:34,520 Speaker 1: really hard to get everything entirely set on Friday for that, 400 00:20:35,200 --> 00:20:37,840 Speaker 1: And I send an email to my husband and our 401 00:20:37,920 --> 00:20:41,679 Speaker 1: nanny on Sunday night that outlines the schedule for the 402 00:20:41,720 --> 00:20:44,480 Speaker 1: week and confirms you know who's driving where if there's 403 00:20:44,520 --> 00:20:47,920 Speaker 1: any differences. I mean, we have a pretty set activity 404 00:20:48,000 --> 00:20:50,760 Speaker 1: schedule at this point, so it's only that you look 405 00:20:50,800 --> 00:20:52,919 Speaker 1: through it to say, okay, well this is changing. I 406 00:20:52,960 --> 00:20:55,080 Speaker 1: try to know most of those things by Friday, but 407 00:20:55,160 --> 00:20:57,920 Speaker 1: sometimes it doesn't get locked in until Sunday. So I 408 00:20:57,920 --> 00:20:59,720 Speaker 1: will say I do a little bit of planning on 409 00:20:59,720 --> 00:21:02,520 Speaker 1: Sunday for personal life, but the work week stuff is 410 00:21:02,520 --> 00:21:05,440 Speaker 1: all planned on Friday, which I think you do too. Yes, 411 00:21:05,600 --> 00:21:07,840 Speaker 1: I do. I think it's useful for all those reasons 412 00:21:07,840 --> 00:21:10,240 Speaker 1: you mentioned, and also because nobody from work wants to 413 00:21:10,240 --> 00:21:12,119 Speaker 1: get an email on Sunday. That's like, let's have a 414 00:21:12,119 --> 00:21:14,840 Speaker 1: meeting on Wednesday. No no, no, yeah no, they don't 415 00:21:14,840 --> 00:21:16,159 Speaker 1: want to have for that one, so you don't want 416 00:21:16,160 --> 00:21:19,720 Speaker 1: any one sending it exactly. All right, let's talk about 417 00:21:19,760 --> 00:21:22,320 Speaker 1: moving before three pm. As I'm sitting here in the 418 00:21:22,320 --> 00:21:26,680 Speaker 1: most disgusting, sweaty post workout gear, h you look great. 419 00:21:28,080 --> 00:21:29,840 Speaker 1: We can see each other, by the way, if people 420 00:21:29,840 --> 00:21:31,240 Speaker 1: are wondering, they're like, wait a minute, aren't you in 421 00:21:31,280 --> 00:21:33,240 Speaker 1: Pennsylvania and she's in Florida. We can see each other. 422 00:21:33,320 --> 00:21:36,680 Speaker 1: We have a video conference going while we do the podcast. 423 00:21:36,760 --> 00:21:41,080 Speaker 1: We found that worked a lot better for managing our conversations. Yes, 424 00:21:41,200 --> 00:21:44,280 Speaker 1: and you know, maybe some podcasts I know like to 425 00:21:44,280 --> 00:21:47,080 Speaker 1: put that up on YouTube, but I never, Lauren, I 426 00:21:47,119 --> 00:21:51,280 Speaker 1: don't usually get dressed up for this, let's put it anyway. 427 00:21:51,960 --> 00:21:54,640 Speaker 1: So yes, moving before three pm. I am somebody who 428 00:21:55,320 --> 00:21:57,679 Speaker 1: I really feel like my default state is better if 429 00:21:57,720 --> 00:21:59,880 Speaker 1: I move pretty much every day unless I'm like taking 430 00:22:00,560 --> 00:22:02,800 Speaker 1: like a purposeful rest day, and even then I would 431 00:22:02,880 --> 00:22:05,120 Speaker 1: rather go outside for a walk or something like that. 432 00:22:05,400 --> 00:22:07,000 Speaker 1: So this is a rule that I feel like I 433 00:22:07,040 --> 00:22:09,919 Speaker 1: have fully signed up for. And I'm curious how you 434 00:22:09,960 --> 00:22:12,600 Speaker 1: saw it play out in others' lives who maybe don't 435 00:22:12,640 --> 00:22:15,320 Speaker 1: have exercise be a habit, Like, how did people do this? 436 00:22:15,480 --> 00:22:19,080 Speaker 1: Was it mostly incorporating walks? Did people do more formal workouts? 437 00:22:19,119 --> 00:22:21,920 Speaker 1: And what was the response? Like it was mostly walks. 438 00:22:22,160 --> 00:22:24,639 Speaker 1: I mean, I think people have their workout times, and 439 00:22:24,680 --> 00:22:26,639 Speaker 1: I certainly don't want to again. If you have a 440 00:22:26,680 --> 00:22:28,639 Speaker 1: time that works for you, far be it from me 441 00:22:28,720 --> 00:22:30,320 Speaker 1: to dissuade for you. So if you go to the 442 00:22:30,320 --> 00:22:33,439 Speaker 1: gym after work twice a week, that is awesome. If you, 443 00:22:33,440 --> 00:22:35,480 Speaker 1: you know, jump on the treadmill at night after your 444 00:22:35,560 --> 00:22:37,800 Speaker 1: kids go to bed, like great, I mean that's a 445 00:22:37,840 --> 00:22:40,240 Speaker 1: time many people don't use for anything good. And it 446 00:22:40,280 --> 00:22:44,440 Speaker 1: turns out that exercise at night does not generally interfere 447 00:22:44,480 --> 00:22:48,680 Speaker 1: with your sleep, you know it. Exercise makes you sleep better, period, 448 00:22:49,400 --> 00:22:52,600 Speaker 1: and so when it happens tends not to matter quite 449 00:22:52,640 --> 00:22:55,200 Speaker 1: as much. So, you know, I don't want to tell 450 00:22:55,240 --> 00:22:57,119 Speaker 1: anyone who's got a regular or eight pm date with 451 00:22:57,160 --> 00:22:59,040 Speaker 1: their treadmill that they're doing it wrong. That's not my 452 00:22:59,119 --> 00:23:02,560 Speaker 1: point here. It's it's more that I'm talking about building 453 00:23:02,640 --> 00:23:06,399 Speaker 1: in little bursts of physical activity into your day. And 454 00:23:06,440 --> 00:23:09,080 Speaker 1: it can be so easy for many people in our 455 00:23:09,119 --> 00:23:12,720 Speaker 1: sedentary society to get up in the morning, get to work, 456 00:23:13,480 --> 00:23:16,800 Speaker 1: sit all day until the end of the day, and 457 00:23:16,840 --> 00:23:19,119 Speaker 1: then you know, you go home and you sit some more, 458 00:23:19,600 --> 00:23:24,119 Speaker 1: and it's hard to feel energetic if you are doing that, 459 00:23:24,280 --> 00:23:27,480 Speaker 1: because our bodies were built to move. I mean, there's 460 00:23:27,480 --> 00:23:30,760 Speaker 1: all sorts of amazing research about what even small amounts 461 00:23:30,800 --> 00:23:33,879 Speaker 1: of exercise can do in terms of you know, one 462 00:23:33,880 --> 00:23:36,679 Speaker 1: of my favorite studies type of studies to collect. I 463 00:23:36,760 --> 00:23:39,920 Speaker 1: make a file of these is studies that compare exercise 464 00:23:40,000 --> 00:23:44,040 Speaker 1: to various pharmaceuticals, and especially the ones that are designed 465 00:23:44,040 --> 00:23:47,480 Speaker 1: to treat sort of long term chronic health problems, whether 466 00:23:47,520 --> 00:23:53,760 Speaker 1: that be you know, sleep problems, mild depression, some chronic pain. 467 00:23:53,880 --> 00:23:56,800 Speaker 1: It's signs that exercise can generally help with that. So 468 00:23:56,880 --> 00:23:59,359 Speaker 1: there's all sorts of things that it does, you know, 469 00:23:59,440 --> 00:24:01,160 Speaker 1: I don't care it as like any sort of way 470 00:24:01,200 --> 00:24:03,200 Speaker 1: to lose weight or to look good in a swimsuit 471 00:24:03,240 --> 00:24:06,480 Speaker 1: has nothing to do with that. So by three pm 472 00:24:06,920 --> 00:24:09,880 Speaker 1: is because that will force you to take some break 473 00:24:10,400 --> 00:24:14,440 Speaker 1: during the average person's work day, and if you haven't 474 00:24:14,440 --> 00:24:16,119 Speaker 1: done it by three pm, three pm and is a 475 00:24:16,119 --> 00:24:18,040 Speaker 1: good time to do it because that's when most people's 476 00:24:18,119 --> 00:24:21,560 Speaker 1: energy hits the low point, at least during sort of 477 00:24:21,560 --> 00:24:23,720 Speaker 1: a nine to five work day, So mid afternoon is 478 00:24:24,040 --> 00:24:27,560 Speaker 1: by far the lowest energy time of the work day. 479 00:24:28,160 --> 00:24:31,080 Speaker 1: So getting up to move at three pm would be 480 00:24:31,280 --> 00:24:33,280 Speaker 1: a very good way to be able to make it 481 00:24:33,320 --> 00:24:35,639 Speaker 1: through the rest of the day productively without having to 482 00:24:35,680 --> 00:24:39,840 Speaker 1: resort to caffeine or anything like that. I wish, Oh, 483 00:24:39,840 --> 00:24:41,800 Speaker 1: go ahead, I just was going to say, I wish 484 00:24:41,880 --> 00:24:44,960 Speaker 1: more companies would make like the Walking Zoom meeting a 485 00:24:45,000 --> 00:24:47,320 Speaker 1: thing like feel free to turn your cameras off and 486 00:24:47,320 --> 00:24:49,320 Speaker 1: take a walk as long as you stay connected, like, 487 00:24:49,720 --> 00:24:51,640 Speaker 1: because I do feel like you get to a point 488 00:24:51,640 --> 00:24:53,719 Speaker 1: where you've been sitting for a number of hours and 489 00:24:53,920 --> 00:24:57,000 Speaker 1: it actually becomes harder to concentrate, and probably moving around 490 00:24:57,240 --> 00:25:01,000 Speaker 1: and just listening would be better on so many fronts, 491 00:25:01,040 --> 00:25:04,879 Speaker 1: like more focus, more energy, like more engagement. And yet 492 00:25:05,520 --> 00:25:08,640 Speaker 1: it depends on the office culture. But I don't think 493 00:25:08,680 --> 00:25:11,240 Speaker 1: everywhere is accepting of that yet, So I don't know. 494 00:25:11,240 --> 00:25:13,520 Speaker 1: Maybe there needs to be a nationwide movie, nationwide move 495 00:25:13,520 --> 00:25:15,600 Speaker 1: and I turn off your camera and go for a walk. 496 00:25:15,680 --> 00:25:19,159 Speaker 1: But I mean it really encourages sort of strategic thinking 497 00:25:19,200 --> 00:25:21,480 Speaker 1: about your time because it forces you to look through 498 00:25:21,520 --> 00:25:23,520 Speaker 1: your day and see, well, where could I get up 499 00:25:23,600 --> 00:25:26,760 Speaker 1: for ten minutes and walk around? And once you start 500 00:25:26,760 --> 00:25:30,320 Speaker 1: seeing that you can do that and things don't necessarily 501 00:25:30,440 --> 00:25:34,000 Speaker 1: fall apart if you do, it can definitely encourage more 502 00:25:34,040 --> 00:25:37,359 Speaker 1: of a proactive mindset about time in general. Yes, no, 503 00:25:37,440 --> 00:25:40,199 Speaker 1: that makes sense. It took me the pandemic before I 504 00:25:40,200 --> 00:25:42,000 Speaker 1: figured out that I could take a walk at lunch 505 00:25:42,040 --> 00:25:45,760 Speaker 1: at work, and now like pretty much on my regular 506 00:25:45,880 --> 00:25:48,200 Speaker 1: patient days if I don't have some kind of a meeting, 507 00:25:48,800 --> 00:25:51,040 Speaker 1: especially if I haven't run that morning, like it's my 508 00:25:51,080 --> 00:25:53,359 Speaker 1: default activity. But it's like no one was going to 509 00:25:53,400 --> 00:25:55,080 Speaker 1: stand there and give me permission I had to figure 510 00:25:55,119 --> 00:25:57,880 Speaker 1: it out that, oh, this is completely doable. Yeah, exactly 511 00:25:58,440 --> 00:26:00,359 Speaker 1: all right. The last one I wanted to talk about 512 00:26:00,520 --> 00:26:04,840 Speaker 1: in this segment is effortful before effortless. So I guess 513 00:26:04,840 --> 00:26:08,520 Speaker 1: my question is is in most cases this just means 514 00:26:08,640 --> 00:26:12,960 Speaker 1: something else before scrolling. Pretty much that could be what 515 00:26:13,000 --> 00:26:16,639 Speaker 1: we called this rule, something before scrolling, so effortful before effortless, 516 00:26:16,640 --> 00:26:19,840 Speaker 1: something before scrolling. We really like our alliterative phrases around 517 00:26:19,840 --> 00:26:23,960 Speaker 1: here at best of both worlds. But yeah, this rule. 518 00:26:24,320 --> 00:26:26,600 Speaker 1: I mean, people have probably heard me talking about this before, 519 00:26:26,720 --> 00:26:29,879 Speaker 1: but we wind up spending the bulk of our leisure 520 00:26:29,920 --> 00:26:33,800 Speaker 1: time on screens just because it is so easy. It 521 00:26:33,800 --> 00:26:35,600 Speaker 1: doesn't require a lot of effort. You don't have to 522 00:26:35,600 --> 00:26:37,560 Speaker 1: plan ahead. You can do it in small chunks of 523 00:26:37,600 --> 00:26:40,119 Speaker 1: time that are uncertain. And so many of us have 524 00:26:40,160 --> 00:26:42,960 Speaker 1: had the experience of feeling like we are starved for time. 525 00:26:43,000 --> 00:26:45,920 Speaker 1: And let you look at your screen time function on 526 00:26:46,040 --> 00:26:48,480 Speaker 1: your phone. It's like telling you you're spending three hours 527 00:26:48,480 --> 00:26:50,560 Speaker 1: a day on there. You're like, I'm not, I'm not. No, 528 00:26:50,640 --> 00:26:53,199 Speaker 1: I'm not, but you are. I mean. It may not 529 00:26:53,280 --> 00:26:55,679 Speaker 1: all be social media or headlines, but some chunk of 530 00:26:55,720 --> 00:26:58,080 Speaker 1: it is, and often more than many of us would 531 00:26:58,200 --> 00:27:01,160 Speaker 1: like to see. So the idea is just to do 532 00:27:01,680 --> 00:27:05,360 Speaker 1: something that requires a little bit of mindfulness or attention 533 00:27:05,840 --> 00:27:09,919 Speaker 1: or engagement for even just a couple of minutes before 534 00:27:09,960 --> 00:27:13,679 Speaker 1: you switch over to the screen time entertainment or the 535 00:27:13,680 --> 00:27:16,040 Speaker 1: passive screen time. At least you don't have to do 536 00:27:16,119 --> 00:27:18,880 Speaker 1: it forever. Like I'm not saying anyone has to give 537 00:27:18,960 --> 00:27:21,200 Speaker 1: up social media. I'm not saying anyone has to give 538 00:27:21,280 --> 00:27:23,760 Speaker 1: up watching television. There's a lot of great shows on 539 00:27:23,960 --> 00:27:27,640 Speaker 1: I know that it's just to flip the automatic order. 540 00:27:27,720 --> 00:27:30,640 Speaker 1: So if you're like, oh, I'd love to do puzzles, 541 00:27:30,800 --> 00:27:32,800 Speaker 1: where or where can I find the time? Like, well, 542 00:27:32,840 --> 00:27:34,639 Speaker 1: if you would watch TV after your kids go to 543 00:27:34,680 --> 00:27:37,280 Speaker 1: sleep at night, maybe do a puzzle for fifteen minutes 544 00:27:37,320 --> 00:27:40,160 Speaker 1: and then go watch TV. You're not giving up the TV. 545 00:27:40,520 --> 00:27:43,119 Speaker 1: You're just challenging yourself to do something else for a 546 00:27:43,200 --> 00:27:45,520 Speaker 1: little bit of time. And you know, one of two 547 00:27:45,520 --> 00:27:49,479 Speaker 1: things happens, Like you either decide that it feels, you know, 548 00:27:49,600 --> 00:27:51,600 Speaker 1: so fun to do your effort full fun that you 549 00:27:51,720 --> 00:27:54,360 Speaker 1: keep going with it. Because generally people do rate those 550 00:27:54,400 --> 00:27:59,200 Speaker 1: sort of active hobbies and fun as more enjoyable than 551 00:27:59,320 --> 00:28:01,639 Speaker 1: passive screen time, but even if you don't, you get 552 00:28:01,680 --> 00:28:04,000 Speaker 1: to be the kind of person who does both. No, 553 00:28:04,119 --> 00:28:07,080 Speaker 1: that makes sense to me. Certain TV shows almost feel 554 00:28:07,160 --> 00:28:09,840 Speaker 1: effort I mean, I know that might sung. I guess 555 00:28:09,840 --> 00:28:11,959 Speaker 1: efforvil is in the eye of the beholder, right, because 556 00:28:12,200 --> 00:28:14,119 Speaker 1: if it's like a special show that my husband and 557 00:28:14,119 --> 00:28:16,040 Speaker 1: I are like watching together and we're discussing it and 558 00:28:16,040 --> 00:28:18,200 Speaker 1: we're like looking forward to it and it feels like 559 00:28:18,240 --> 00:28:20,680 Speaker 1: an event because we've like finally gotten to that moment 560 00:28:20,680 --> 00:28:23,560 Speaker 1: of relaxation, to me, that feels much more effortful and 561 00:28:23,640 --> 00:28:26,920 Speaker 1: purposeful then like pull up my phone and like look 562 00:28:26,920 --> 00:28:29,040 Speaker 1: at god knows what, check my email for the fiftieth time, 563 00:28:29,119 --> 00:28:32,720 Speaker 1: or look at social media or things like that. So yeah, 564 00:28:32,720 --> 00:28:35,560 Speaker 1: I guess that's my take on TV as maybe a 565 00:28:35,600 --> 00:28:40,000 Speaker 1: step up from this sort of like very haphazard online activity. 566 00:28:40,040 --> 00:28:42,640 Speaker 1: But I also love the idea of doing a puzzle 567 00:28:42,720 --> 00:28:44,880 Speaker 1: or something more active, or taking a walk or something 568 00:28:44,920 --> 00:28:47,680 Speaker 1: like that. How about one night for you. I feel 569 00:28:47,720 --> 00:28:52,000 Speaker 1: like this is one where some people, particularly women, are 570 00:28:52,280 --> 00:28:55,040 Speaker 1: going to struggle or say like I can't because I 571 00:28:55,120 --> 00:28:57,560 Speaker 1: have to be there at bedtime every single night, or 572 00:28:57,600 --> 00:29:00,440 Speaker 1: something terrible will happen. What would you say to someone 573 00:29:00,760 --> 00:29:04,280 Speaker 1: that just doesn't feel like it's possible because their partner 574 00:29:04,320 --> 00:29:07,360 Speaker 1: is resistant, or because they have seventeen children and they 575 00:29:07,400 --> 00:29:09,840 Speaker 1: all have to have a personalized bedtime routine, what would 576 00:29:09,840 --> 00:29:12,400 Speaker 1: you say, Yeah, well, we could always come up with excuses. 577 00:29:12,440 --> 00:29:15,280 Speaker 1: I mean, you know it. I would challenge people to 578 00:29:15,360 --> 00:29:17,800 Speaker 1: just give it a try. It may turn out that 579 00:29:17,840 --> 00:29:21,800 Speaker 1: your partner is completely incompetent, and then I'm sorry that 580 00:29:21,800 --> 00:29:24,560 Speaker 1: that happened. Maybe that's something that you too need to 581 00:29:24,560 --> 00:29:29,440 Speaker 1: work on. But like you wound up with this person 582 00:29:29,560 --> 00:29:33,040 Speaker 1: and you know, are still with them and presumably trying 583 00:29:33,040 --> 00:29:35,320 Speaker 1: to raise children together. So maybe you can work something 584 00:29:35,320 --> 00:29:37,760 Speaker 1: out right and each of you can have one night 585 00:29:37,760 --> 00:29:39,600 Speaker 1: off you're your partner can take a night to go 586 00:29:39,680 --> 00:29:41,160 Speaker 1: do something fun, and you can take a night to 587 00:29:41,200 --> 00:29:43,400 Speaker 1: go do something fun, and you can cover for each 588 00:29:43,440 --> 00:29:47,240 Speaker 1: other and learn to you know, develop new skills in 589 00:29:47,280 --> 00:29:49,800 Speaker 1: the course of this happening. But even if it was 590 00:29:49,880 --> 00:29:52,400 Speaker 1: you know, maybe you come home a little late after bedtime, 591 00:29:52,440 --> 00:29:54,640 Speaker 1: like one night a week, and things haven't happened as 592 00:29:54,640 --> 00:29:57,480 Speaker 1: you wish they would, like you mop up the mess 593 00:29:57,640 --> 00:30:00,120 Speaker 1: and then you just go from there, but you still 594 00:30:00,160 --> 00:30:02,400 Speaker 1: got your fun. Like I think it's worth it to 595 00:30:02,760 --> 00:30:05,400 Speaker 1: have things maybe be off a little bit one night 596 00:30:06,040 --> 00:30:09,520 Speaker 1: if it means that you feel more excited about life 597 00:30:09,640 --> 00:30:13,520 Speaker 1: in general. So I challenge people to think about it. 598 00:30:13,880 --> 00:30:15,280 Speaker 1: And it doesn't have to be a night. Maybe it 599 00:30:15,280 --> 00:30:17,520 Speaker 1: could be a weekend morning, right, like you trade off 600 00:30:17,520 --> 00:30:20,040 Speaker 1: weekend mornings that you go do something fun for you, 601 00:30:20,720 --> 00:30:23,400 Speaker 1: but ideally making a commitment to something because that nudge 602 00:30:23,440 --> 00:30:25,600 Speaker 1: is it to happen? Right that I sing it a 603 00:30:25,680 --> 00:30:29,200 Speaker 1: choir and if I don't show up, that's a problem. Like, 604 00:30:29,280 --> 00:30:31,760 Speaker 1: you know, my voice part expects me to be there. 605 00:30:32,320 --> 00:30:34,480 Speaker 1: If you play on a softball team, like you know, 606 00:30:34,560 --> 00:30:36,560 Speaker 1: suddenly they don't have a second basement if you are 607 00:30:36,600 --> 00:30:39,720 Speaker 1: not there. If you are signed up to work in 608 00:30:39,760 --> 00:30:41,680 Speaker 1: a soup kitchen and you come every Thursday night and 609 00:30:41,720 --> 00:30:45,960 Speaker 1: nobody's manning the you know entree, like that's a problem. Right, 610 00:30:46,240 --> 00:30:49,640 Speaker 1: So you will go even if life is busy, even 611 00:30:49,680 --> 00:30:51,640 Speaker 1: if you are tired, even if you know a kid 612 00:30:51,640 --> 00:30:53,719 Speaker 1: would like you to drive them somewhere. You'll work out 613 00:30:53,760 --> 00:30:56,600 Speaker 1: a different solution. And I think you know that nudges 614 00:30:56,680 --> 00:31:00,160 Speaker 1: this act of self care to actually happen. Love it. 615 00:31:00,560 --> 00:31:02,080 Speaker 1: I got book club, I got to work on some 616 00:31:02,160 --> 00:31:05,560 Speaker 1: other fun evening activities. All right, well, let's take a 617 00:31:05,600 --> 00:31:07,680 Speaker 1: little bit of a pivot and talk a little bit 618 00:31:07,720 --> 00:31:10,800 Speaker 1: about your writing process. Can you talk about how does 619 00:31:10,960 --> 00:31:12,920 Speaker 1: you know we have a lot of people curious about 620 00:31:12,960 --> 00:31:14,880 Speaker 1: how do you put together a book when you've come 621 00:31:14,960 --> 00:31:17,480 Speaker 1: up with an idea like this? So how did you 622 00:31:17,560 --> 00:31:20,560 Speaker 1: go from the study to the book itself? Yeah, So, 623 00:31:21,080 --> 00:31:24,040 Speaker 1: once we had all the data, both qualitative and quantitative, 624 00:31:24,040 --> 00:31:27,800 Speaker 1: we started pulling out quotes that you know, illustrated each 625 00:31:27,840 --> 00:31:30,600 Speaker 1: of these points, like how people were feeling about different rules, 626 00:31:30,600 --> 00:31:33,680 Speaker 1: the challenges they faced, how they overcame those challenges. Would 627 00:31:33,680 --> 00:31:36,760 Speaker 1: get various anecdotes with that, And so I gave myself 628 00:31:36,800 --> 00:31:40,080 Speaker 1: a writing schedule over the summer of twenty twenty one. 629 00:31:40,160 --> 00:31:42,120 Speaker 1: So once I had all my data, I would start 630 00:31:42,240 --> 00:31:45,680 Speaker 1: cranking it out. So what this would look like is, say, 631 00:31:45,840 --> 00:31:48,640 Speaker 1: you know, each week, I would do one chapter, Like 632 00:31:48,680 --> 00:31:51,320 Speaker 1: so chapter one would be a week in late June, 633 00:31:51,760 --> 00:31:55,080 Speaker 1: and I would, you know, crank out a draft of 634 00:31:55,120 --> 00:31:58,600 Speaker 1: the chapter Monday and Tuesday. I would do some edits 635 00:31:58,640 --> 00:32:02,160 Speaker 1: on Wednesday and Thursday day, with Friday as my open day. 636 00:32:02,160 --> 00:32:04,560 Speaker 1: Because I build an open space, which turns out to 637 00:32:04,680 --> 00:32:07,400 Speaker 1: be one of the tranquility by Tuesday rules. But that 638 00:32:07,480 --> 00:32:09,760 Speaker 1: was there in case stuff comes up, or you know, 639 00:32:10,120 --> 00:32:12,000 Speaker 1: I couldn't work as much earlier in the week as 640 00:32:12,000 --> 00:32:14,680 Speaker 1: I wanted to, or something else got pushed because I 641 00:32:14,720 --> 00:32:17,080 Speaker 1: was working so hard on the book. And I would 642 00:32:17,120 --> 00:32:20,000 Speaker 1: build in breaks into this schedule too, so I would write, 643 00:32:20,040 --> 00:32:22,240 Speaker 1: say the introduction, chapter one and two, and then have 644 00:32:22,320 --> 00:32:25,600 Speaker 1: a week off for mop up, so anything that needed 645 00:32:25,640 --> 00:32:28,080 Speaker 1: to go back to during that time, and then maybe 646 00:32:28,120 --> 00:32:30,440 Speaker 1: I do three, four, and five, and then take a 647 00:32:30,440 --> 00:32:33,720 Speaker 1: week that was open and so on to get through 648 00:32:33,720 --> 00:32:36,920 Speaker 1: the book. And yeah, that's how I wrote a draft 649 00:32:37,040 --> 00:32:39,320 Speaker 1: of it. And then once you have a draft, obviously 650 00:32:39,400 --> 00:32:42,040 Speaker 1: it has to go in through edits. My editor worked 651 00:32:42,040 --> 00:32:43,840 Speaker 1: on it and you know, came back to me and 652 00:32:44,600 --> 00:32:48,720 Speaker 1: did this basically twice, and then you know, it's it's 653 00:32:48,760 --> 00:32:53,200 Speaker 1: been pretty much set since early spring of twenty twenty two. 654 00:32:53,280 --> 00:32:55,920 Speaker 1: The book writing process is such that everything pretty much 655 00:32:55,920 --> 00:32:58,480 Speaker 1: has to be set by then. So, yeah, we've just 656 00:32:58,520 --> 00:33:00,440 Speaker 1: been waiting for it to come out then for the 657 00:33:00,480 --> 00:33:03,400 Speaker 1: last six months. Here. I remember one thing that you 658 00:33:03,440 --> 00:33:07,160 Speaker 1: did is that you did like a solo beach retreat, 659 00:33:07,320 --> 00:33:10,120 Speaker 1: was that to finish the edits on this book. It was, 660 00:33:10,240 --> 00:33:13,560 Speaker 1: so in late October of twenty twenty one, I went 661 00:33:13,600 --> 00:33:16,880 Speaker 1: to Cape May for two nights, sort of two full days, 662 00:33:16,880 --> 00:33:20,880 Speaker 1: two nights, and just hold myself up in a hotel 663 00:33:20,960 --> 00:33:23,040 Speaker 1: room there with a nice view of the beach. But 664 00:33:23,400 --> 00:33:25,680 Speaker 1: I wanted to be able to get through the whole 665 00:33:25,720 --> 00:33:29,480 Speaker 1: book in one fell swoop without constantly being interrupted by 666 00:33:29,560 --> 00:33:32,240 Speaker 1: things like, you know, having to take a kid somewhere 667 00:33:32,280 --> 00:33:34,440 Speaker 1: or have a kid ask a question. You know, even 668 00:33:35,000 --> 00:33:37,160 Speaker 1: when you work from a home, there's just always stuff 669 00:33:37,240 --> 00:33:41,240 Speaker 1: like I wanted to remove everything and allow myself to 670 00:33:41,320 --> 00:33:43,400 Speaker 1: get a sense of the book as a whole. And 671 00:33:43,480 --> 00:33:46,760 Speaker 1: so I went to the hotel. I started working the 672 00:33:46,800 --> 00:33:49,440 Speaker 1: first night, got up and ran on the beach in 673 00:33:49,440 --> 00:33:51,719 Speaker 1: the morning, and then spent the whole day working and 674 00:33:52,040 --> 00:33:54,800 Speaker 1: got through some stuff and you know, finished the next morning. 675 00:33:54,880 --> 00:33:57,120 Speaker 1: And it was good. It was good to really have 676 00:33:57,200 --> 00:33:59,000 Speaker 1: that time. I've done that for a few other books, 677 00:33:59,040 --> 00:34:01,240 Speaker 1: you know, I did it for Off Clock, and that 678 00:34:01,320 --> 00:34:04,360 Speaker 1: was really helpful, just to kind of when you are 679 00:34:04,480 --> 00:34:09,319 Speaker 1: in that deep editing phase, to be able to experience 680 00:34:09,400 --> 00:34:12,600 Speaker 1: the book all at once, I mean kind of as 681 00:34:12,640 --> 00:34:16,360 Speaker 1: a reader might and instead of being in these short 682 00:34:16,360 --> 00:34:19,280 Speaker 1: bits where you can't necessarily think of the whole book 683 00:34:19,280 --> 00:34:22,600 Speaker 1: in your head simultaneously. No, that makes sense. And your 684 00:34:22,640 --> 00:34:25,800 Speaker 1: book definitely feels like it comes together as a finished 685 00:34:25,840 --> 00:34:28,719 Speaker 1: product rather than a series of disjointed steps. So I 686 00:34:28,760 --> 00:34:30,759 Speaker 1: guess it paid off. Plus it was probably kind of 687 00:34:30,760 --> 00:34:36,000 Speaker 1: fun as well. And speaking of fun, we have our listener. Well. Actually, 688 00:34:36,200 --> 00:34:38,160 Speaker 1: first I just wanted to mention before we move on 689 00:34:38,200 --> 00:34:41,240 Speaker 1: to our listener question, which does relate to this book's themes, 690 00:34:41,920 --> 00:34:44,360 Speaker 1: that if you enjoyed this conversation and if you enjoy 691 00:34:44,400 --> 00:34:47,400 Speaker 1: best at both worlds, I really do advise you that 692 00:34:47,440 --> 00:34:50,800 Speaker 1: you're you're most likely going to really enjoy Tranquility by Tuesday. 693 00:34:51,120 --> 00:34:53,200 Speaker 1: And if you're going to get it anyway, you might 694 00:34:53,239 --> 00:34:56,719 Speaker 1: as well get it now. So Laura's not going to 695 00:34:56,800 --> 00:34:59,600 Speaker 1: want to like tootor our own horn, but really definitely 696 00:34:59,600 --> 00:35:02,640 Speaker 1: consider pre ordering it, pre ordering it as books, buying 697 00:35:02,680 --> 00:35:04,800 Speaker 1: it for your book club, et cetera. I do not 698 00:35:04,920 --> 00:35:07,560 Speaker 1: think you will regret it, all right, our question, our 699 00:35:07,680 --> 00:35:10,120 Speaker 1: question is, and this relates very much to the themes 700 00:35:10,160 --> 00:35:12,880 Speaker 1: of the books. Somebody wrote that they love the idea 701 00:35:12,920 --> 00:35:15,480 Speaker 1: of big and literal adventures but struggle to come up 702 00:35:15,480 --> 00:35:18,319 Speaker 1: with ideas and struggle to know which is big and 703 00:35:18,360 --> 00:35:22,279 Speaker 1: which is little. Yeah, well so yeah, the rule is 704 00:35:22,280 --> 00:35:24,160 Speaker 1: one big adventure and one little adventure, and we can 705 00:35:24,200 --> 00:35:27,480 Speaker 1: get sort of you know, as we analyze the text, 706 00:35:27,560 --> 00:35:30,000 Speaker 1: what is the exact meaning of one big adventure and 707 00:35:30,000 --> 00:35:31,759 Speaker 1: one little adventure? I mean, what I say in the 708 00:35:31,800 --> 00:35:34,200 Speaker 1: book is roughly that a big adventure is three to 709 00:35:34,239 --> 00:35:36,640 Speaker 1: four hours, So think half a weekend day, something you 710 00:35:36,640 --> 00:35:38,959 Speaker 1: could do on a weekend morning before a kid's nap 711 00:35:39,000 --> 00:35:42,520 Speaker 1: in the afternoon. A little adventures just an hour could 712 00:35:42,560 --> 00:35:44,640 Speaker 1: be less than an hour, could happen on a lunch 713 00:35:44,680 --> 00:35:47,040 Speaker 1: break a weekday evening, just as long as it's out 714 00:35:47,040 --> 00:35:50,560 Speaker 1: of the ordinary. And the idea of having two per 715 00:35:50,600 --> 00:35:52,680 Speaker 1: week is just to get yourself on a good pace 716 00:35:52,760 --> 00:35:56,120 Speaker 1: of doing something that is different, right, something that makes 717 00:35:56,160 --> 00:35:59,640 Speaker 1: your week feel like it is memorable instead of being 718 00:35:59,680 --> 00:36:01,799 Speaker 1: the same thing over and over again. But you know, 719 00:36:01,880 --> 00:36:05,200 Speaker 1: two relatively small adventures each week is not going to 720 00:36:05,320 --> 00:36:08,120 Speaker 1: exhaust or bankrupt anyone like you can still spend a 721 00:36:08,120 --> 00:36:09,960 Speaker 1: lot of time hanging out in your pajamas if that 722 00:36:10,120 --> 00:36:13,480 Speaker 1: is what you wish to do. As for finding adventures, 723 00:36:14,000 --> 00:36:16,120 Speaker 1: I mean, this is skills we use all the time. 724 00:36:16,160 --> 00:36:18,080 Speaker 1: As we're thinking what do we do with kids, for 725 00:36:18,080 --> 00:36:22,000 Speaker 1: instance on a rainy Saturday. I mean, you're always kind 726 00:36:22,000 --> 00:36:24,560 Speaker 1: of come up with stuff. And one thing I do 727 00:36:24,760 --> 00:36:29,080 Speaker 1: is get on email lists for area organizations because you know, 728 00:36:29,320 --> 00:36:33,839 Speaker 1: every institution, every organization has some sort of programming, right, 729 00:36:33,880 --> 00:36:35,680 Speaker 1: that's what they do, That's what the people who run 730 00:36:35,719 --> 00:36:38,319 Speaker 1: them are always thinking about what new programs are we 731 00:36:38,360 --> 00:36:40,399 Speaker 1: going to put out there, And so if you are 732 00:36:40,400 --> 00:36:43,240 Speaker 1: on the email list for these organizations, you will see 733 00:36:43,280 --> 00:36:46,399 Speaker 1: that your you know, library system has a new art 734 00:36:46,440 --> 00:36:49,400 Speaker 1: exhibit at the branch that is not the one you 735 00:36:49,440 --> 00:36:51,400 Speaker 1: normally go to, but it's not too far away, and 736 00:36:51,440 --> 00:36:53,800 Speaker 1: so that might be something you could do one weekday 737 00:36:53,840 --> 00:36:55,320 Speaker 1: evening or on a lunch break, and that would be 738 00:36:55,360 --> 00:36:58,560 Speaker 1: a little adventure. For instance, you can always do your 739 00:36:58,719 --> 00:37:01,680 Speaker 1: routines in a slightly different way. So if you exercise 740 00:37:01,760 --> 00:37:05,640 Speaker 1: in some capacity, maybe instead of walking in one place, 741 00:37:05,680 --> 00:37:09,360 Speaker 1: you take a different trail right, or you try a 742 00:37:09,400 --> 00:37:12,120 Speaker 1: different exercise class than you have tried before, or you 743 00:37:12,440 --> 00:37:15,200 Speaker 1: run with somebody new, or maybe you bike to a 744 00:37:15,280 --> 00:37:18,480 Speaker 1: destination like bike an errand right and bring your lock 745 00:37:18,560 --> 00:37:20,560 Speaker 1: and do the errand and bike back like that. If 746 00:37:20,600 --> 00:37:23,080 Speaker 1: that's not something you normally do. That could be a 747 00:37:23,120 --> 00:37:25,359 Speaker 1: way to shake that up a little bit. You can 748 00:37:25,400 --> 00:37:29,240 Speaker 1: always be a tourist in your own town. That wherever 749 00:37:29,280 --> 00:37:32,520 Speaker 1: you live, there are various things that people are told 750 00:37:32,560 --> 00:37:35,319 Speaker 1: to do when they are visiting, and those can be 751 00:37:35,400 --> 00:37:38,040 Speaker 1: things that you try out as well. Probably many of 752 00:37:38,080 --> 00:37:40,240 Speaker 1: them are fun, and that's why they are recommended to people. 753 00:37:40,280 --> 00:37:43,000 Speaker 1: So maybe it's that great Hamburger place that you know 754 00:37:43,080 --> 00:37:45,640 Speaker 1: everyone has to try, or maybe it's a hike that's 755 00:37:45,680 --> 00:37:47,560 Speaker 1: near town that you want to do, or it's a 756 00:37:47,680 --> 00:37:50,520 Speaker 1: drive in theater that you know is really old and 757 00:37:50,680 --> 00:37:52,239 Speaker 1: historic and you know you never have gone to it, 758 00:37:52,280 --> 00:37:54,320 Speaker 1: but they do show occasional movies like that's something you 759 00:37:54,320 --> 00:37:57,080 Speaker 1: could do. That would be an adventure as well, you know, 760 00:37:57,320 --> 00:37:59,399 Speaker 1: I mean, and honestly, it's more a state of mind 761 00:37:59,400 --> 00:38:02,359 Speaker 1: than anything else. And so even in the darkest days 762 00:38:02,400 --> 00:38:05,600 Speaker 1: of lockdown, there were ways to have adventures, and I 763 00:38:05,640 --> 00:38:07,880 Speaker 1: did Tranquility by Tuesday the Project. In the spring of 764 00:38:07,880 --> 00:38:09,799 Speaker 1: twenty twenty one in the US, at least a lot 765 00:38:09,800 --> 00:38:12,080 Speaker 1: of people were coming out of a lot of those restrictions, 766 00:38:12,120 --> 00:38:15,080 Speaker 1: but there were still some in various places that people 767 00:38:15,080 --> 00:38:17,759 Speaker 1: were coming from, and you know, they'd still come up 768 00:38:17,800 --> 00:38:21,680 Speaker 1: with stuff like I mean, people built a little bridge 769 00:38:21,760 --> 00:38:25,120 Speaker 1: out of sticks over a stream in their backyard, right, 770 00:38:25,160 --> 00:38:27,120 Speaker 1: Like that was something they did with their kids as 771 00:38:27,200 --> 00:38:30,520 Speaker 1: an adventure. Somebody did a chalk game of shoots and 772 00:38:30,600 --> 00:38:33,440 Speaker 1: ladders on their driveway, Like that's a little adventure. So 773 00:38:33,640 --> 00:38:38,560 Speaker 1: there's always something you can do. I love it well. 774 00:38:39,120 --> 00:38:42,200 Speaker 1: Other than Tranquility by Tuesday, which is our official love 775 00:38:42,200 --> 00:38:45,000 Speaker 1: of the week this week, our unofficial loves of the week, 776 00:38:45,120 --> 00:38:47,439 Speaker 1: I guess I will share mine is a very Laura 777 00:38:47,520 --> 00:38:50,719 Speaker 1: Vandercamp inspired stationary find. And the reason I say that 778 00:38:50,800 --> 00:38:53,440 Speaker 1: is because everybody knows that one of the things she 779 00:38:53,520 --> 00:38:57,000 Speaker 1: advocates trying every once in a while or continuously, depending 780 00:38:57,000 --> 00:38:59,440 Speaker 1: on what you're looking for, is to track your time. 781 00:39:00,080 --> 00:39:02,359 Speaker 1: And perhaps if you are inspired to do so by 782 00:39:02,360 --> 00:39:04,640 Speaker 1: a Tranquility by Tuesday, you could also track some of 783 00:39:04,680 --> 00:39:08,680 Speaker 1: these metrics. And I discovered this little study planner called 784 00:39:08,680 --> 00:39:12,000 Speaker 1: the Cocuyo Campus Daily, a five study planner. It's available 785 00:39:12,000 --> 00:39:15,000 Speaker 1: for a whopping five dollars and fifty cents on jet pens, 786 00:39:15,320 --> 00:39:17,880 Speaker 1: and it has sixty days worth where you can actually 787 00:39:18,000 --> 00:39:21,200 Speaker 1: pretty nicely write out what your schedule expect for the day. 788 00:39:21,480 --> 00:39:23,759 Speaker 1: You can do some fun color coding. There would be 789 00:39:23,760 --> 00:39:25,920 Speaker 1: space down below where you could, you know, cross off 790 00:39:25,960 --> 00:39:29,920 Speaker 1: your TBT metrics and the price is right on points. 791 00:39:29,920 --> 00:39:32,200 Speaker 1: So if you wanted to do this for I mean 792 00:39:32,400 --> 00:39:34,560 Speaker 1: sixty days takes you through two months, you could buy 793 00:39:34,560 --> 00:39:36,520 Speaker 1: two of these for ten bucks and you know, go 794 00:39:36,600 --> 00:39:39,680 Speaker 1: through things for more than ten weeks. Sounds great. Yeah, 795 00:39:39,840 --> 00:39:41,200 Speaker 1: have to check that out. I know a lot of 796 00:39:41,239 --> 00:39:44,040 Speaker 1: people do enjoy or at least find it useful to 797 00:39:44,080 --> 00:39:45,839 Speaker 1: try tracking their time for a while. And if you're 798 00:39:45,840 --> 00:39:48,200 Speaker 1: not big on spreadsheets, that would be another way to 799 00:39:48,200 --> 00:39:50,000 Speaker 1: do it. So my love of the week I have two. 800 00:39:50,480 --> 00:39:54,239 Speaker 1: One is the series of nine icons that we came 801 00:39:54,360 --> 00:39:58,440 Speaker 1: up with to show the nine rules. So if you 802 00:39:58,440 --> 00:40:02,600 Speaker 1: look at any of my you know, peripheral stuff that's 803 00:40:02,640 --> 00:40:05,560 Speaker 1: coming out of the scorecard, the Tranquility by Tuesday scorecard 804 00:40:05,760 --> 00:40:09,520 Speaker 1: or the discussion guides or the excerpt if you pre 805 00:40:09,640 --> 00:40:12,000 Speaker 1: order like, they have these icons on them for the 806 00:40:12,080 --> 00:40:14,600 Speaker 1: nine rules, and they're really cute looking. They're very eye catchy. 807 00:40:14,719 --> 00:40:18,600 Speaker 1: So I love that. I'm also really enjoying and happy 808 00:40:18,680 --> 00:40:22,560 Speaker 1: to be sharing my Tranquility by Tuesday in real life videos. 809 00:40:22,640 --> 00:40:24,799 Speaker 1: It was so fun to do this, like I had 810 00:40:24,800 --> 00:40:29,120 Speaker 1: not produced with somebody like a series of my own videos. 811 00:40:29,200 --> 00:40:32,960 Speaker 1: I've been interviewed for stuff, and you know, done segments 812 00:40:33,000 --> 00:40:35,479 Speaker 1: for things, but I'd never conceived of what I would 813 00:40:35,480 --> 00:40:37,359 Speaker 1: do sort of from start to end and think about 814 00:40:37,360 --> 00:40:39,440 Speaker 1: how we could get the footage for it and who 815 00:40:39,520 --> 00:40:41,560 Speaker 1: might want to do it and how we would show it. 816 00:40:41,600 --> 00:40:43,879 Speaker 1: And it was a new skill. It was something I'd 817 00:40:43,880 --> 00:40:46,239 Speaker 1: wanted to do for a while. And I'm really happy 818 00:40:46,280 --> 00:40:48,799 Speaker 1: with all these turned out, so please check those out 819 00:40:48,800 --> 00:40:52,479 Speaker 1: as well. Awesome, love it well, this has been best 820 00:40:52,480 --> 00:40:55,960 Speaker 1: of both worlds. We've been talking all things tranquility by Tuesday, 821 00:40:56,000 --> 00:40:59,080 Speaker 1: and I definitely want to thank everyone for pre ordering 822 00:40:59,120 --> 00:41:01,520 Speaker 1: the book for buying it on October eleventh, if you 823 00:41:01,560 --> 00:41:02,680 Speaker 1: want to wait till end, but if you want to 824 00:41:02,760 --> 00:41:04,279 Speaker 1: order it the week early, happy to send you all 825 00:41:04,320 --> 00:41:07,080 Speaker 1: the bonuses. I really do appreciate everyone's support. It is 826 00:41:07,160 --> 00:41:11,319 Speaker 1: so fun to share a book with a supportive community 827 00:41:11,440 --> 00:41:13,759 Speaker 1: and to know that people are reading it. So thank 828 00:41:13,840 --> 00:41:16,879 Speaker 1: you so much, Thank you, and we will be back 829 00:41:16,920 --> 00:41:19,520 Speaker 1: next week with more on making work and life fit together. 830 00:41:21,480 --> 00:41:24,279 Speaker 1: Thanks for listening. You can find me Sarah at the 831 00:41:24,280 --> 00:41:28,680 Speaker 1: shoebox dot com or at the Underscore shoebox on Instagram, 832 00:41:29,120 --> 00:41:33,040 Speaker 1: and you can find me Laura at Laura vandercam dot com. 833 00:41:33,480 --> 00:41:36,720 Speaker 1: This has been the best of both worlds podcasts. Please 834 00:41:36,800 --> 00:41:39,360 Speaker 1: join us next time for more on making work and 835 00:41:39,440 --> 00:41:40,600 Speaker 1: life work together