Speaker 1: Welcome back to I Do Part two. I'm one of
Speaker 1: your celebrity mentors. It's Jenniferfessler from the Real Housewives of
Speaker 1: New Jersey and co host of the podcast Two Jersey Jays.
Speaker 1: Today is going to be fun. On this podcast, we
Speaker 1: talk a lot about the chapter two of it all,
Speaker 1: but today I'm going to be joined by two handsome
Speaker 1: men who are trying to get it right the first
Speaker 1: time around. Help me. Welcome John and Matt from the
Speaker 1: new season A Farmer Wants a Wife to the podcast.
Speaker 1: Hi guys, welcome, welcome, Thanks for having us, well, thank
Speaker 1: you for coming. I have to say, the first thing
Speaker 1: that occurs to me looking at the both of you is,
Speaker 1: why would one choose to be a farmer when they
Speaker 1: so obviously should be a model?
Speaker 2: What are you thinking?
Speaker 1: And probably I don't know if it would be easier
Speaker 1: or not. It feels like it'd be easier than being
Speaker 1: a farmer. But you're both gorgeous, and I mean you're
Speaker 1: here and you're single looking for love. We're just so
Speaker 1: excited to find out what is going on. Well, actually
Speaker 1: wore my cowboy hat in your honor. I love it
Speaker 1: out right right right, Thank you very flattering. Thank you.
Speaker 1: So all right, let's get into all the upcoming season.
Speaker 1: A farmer wants a wife. We actually just talked about
Speaker 1: this on a recent episode of the podcast. But did
Speaker 1: you guys know that, according to a divorce attorney, farmers
Speaker 1: are one of the professions least likely to cheat in
Speaker 1: a marriage.
Speaker 3: Really, have you heard that?
Speaker 2: Someone else told me that recently. I don't remember where
Speaker 2: I heard that, but I definitely believe it.
Speaker 1: Ladies, if you didn't want them because they're so good looking,
Speaker 1: here's the thing, they're all so loyal. So top three
Speaker 1: careers to not cheat accountant's, pharmacists, and farmers.
Speaker 3: Wow. Right, accountant surprises me too.
Speaker 1: My husband started out as an accountant. And if we're
Speaker 1: going to be real here on the pod, didn't really
Speaker 1: work out that quite that way for us. We're still together.
Speaker 2: Oh you're the exception. I guess we were the exception.
Speaker 1: Yes, yeah, but I think that's interesting. I mean, you
Speaker 1: guys are still you're still young, but you really are
Speaker 1: looking to settle down, both of you.
Speaker 3: Yeah about young?
Speaker 2: Wow, well, what are you thirty? I'm thirty.
Speaker 3: I'm twice six.
Speaker 1: You don't think that that's young.
Speaker 3: No, I was proud.
Speaker 1: You guys bring this dynamic to the show. Yeah, you
Speaker 1: became good friends, there four of you.
Speaker 2: The first day I walked up on filming, I hadn't
Speaker 2: met the guys in and immediately like, you're the oldest one.
Speaker 1: Okay, listen, I can't have this conversation. I'm fifty six
Speaker 1: years old. So you guys have this among I appreciate that. Wow,
Speaker 1: your baby. I have a twenty five year old son.
Speaker 1: Oh really, I'm getting depressed. Let's move on. Tell me
Speaker 1: a little bit about we're just going to start jump
Speaker 1: right in. What kind of woman that you're looking for?
Speaker 2: Let's go first, Go ahead, man, let's take this one
Speaker 2: all right. You know, I'll say too that I was
Speaker 2: pretty impressed on the show, like they really did care about,
Speaker 2: like what you're looking for. It's not just based off
Speaker 2: and whatever, you know.
Speaker 1: So the things that I you know, it's not just
Speaker 1: looks that you're looking for.
Speaker 2: No, I like looks, but the things that I had
Speaker 2: said is like a you know, really family oriented Christian
Speaker 2: and you know, just someone that likes to have fun
Speaker 2: is my biggest thing, because I love just traveling and
Speaker 2: doing things and being out with friends and all that
Speaker 2: kind of stuff. So I've been with gals in the past,
Speaker 2: I like don't enjoy that as much. And so that
Speaker 2: creates problems there.
Speaker 1: Because is it a travel thing or just not so.
Speaker 2: Much travel, but just you know, being with friends, being
Speaker 2: with my family. I just some girls, you know, they
Speaker 2: just want to be just with you all the time.
Speaker 1: Red Flag girl doesn't have girlfriends or a lot of girlfriends.
Speaker 1: It is. Yeah, that's interesting.
Speaker 2: Yeah, in my experience, been pretty good indication of no.
Speaker 1: I think that's so interesting.
Speaker 2: Yeah, which, you know, teach their out. You don't have
Speaker 2: to do that but.
Speaker 1: For you, for me, because I'm not to make it
Speaker 1: about me, but I like to do that. But like
Speaker 1: I am a very social person and my husband really
Speaker 1: never was. But for some reason it worked. I could
Speaker 1: kind of brought them over to the dark side. But yeah,
Speaker 1: I guess maybe easier to start out with someone that's
Speaker 1: like you, likes to go out, likes to mix it
Speaker 1: up a little bit. Bavel what about you? What are
Speaker 1: we looking for?
Speaker 4: I mean, going into the show, I was really looking
Speaker 4: for somebody who would just be a great mother, you know,
Speaker 4: somebody who's nurturing and caring, also support me through and through.
Speaker 4: So that I could do the same for her. But
Speaker 4: going through the show and you know, coming out of
Speaker 4: it after like kind of being reflective in the OTF,
Speaker 4: which is what we call the interviews, the side of interviews,
Speaker 4: I kind of just decide on somebody, you know, I
Speaker 4: want somebody who I can just really get along with
Speaker 4: in the end, because that's all that really matters. That's
Speaker 4: who you're going to be spending the rest of your
Speaker 4: life with. So if you really can't get along with
Speaker 4: that person.
Speaker 1: Then yeah, no, I think it's that's absolutely true. But
Speaker 1: I'm going to say to you both that all of
Speaker 1: what you're saying, I mean I think that a lot
Speaker 1: of girls can fit the bill right what you're describing,
Speaker 1: likes to have fun and someone you can get along with.
Speaker 1: So I got to get we're going have to get
Speaker 1: a little deep for right, Christian very true sost to you.
Speaker 1: Both of you or someone someone open to it religious,
Speaker 1: we're both okay, So I mean that's helpful, right, so
Speaker 1: that at least we can narrow it down a little bit.
Speaker 1: Anything else you can give me though, and maybe even
Speaker 1: after filming, like specifics, I really I realized that I
Speaker 1: like girls with whatever long dark hair, or I like
Speaker 1: girls that love Would you bond with any of these
Speaker 1: girls specifically over something I like?
Speaker 2: I really like girls that don't like me as much.
Speaker 1: It's a horrible it is not let me tell you something.
Speaker 1: You came to the right place because I don't like No,
Speaker 1: because I used to work for this. I used to
Speaker 1: work for these women that wrote a book called The Rules,
Speaker 1: and the Rules is all about how to play hard
Speaker 1: to get. This is going back when I was your age.
Speaker 1: I worked for these people and there's this whole philosophy
Speaker 1: on it that I actually subscribe to and I try
Speaker 1: to get my daughters to subscribe to it as well.
Speaker 1: Is men just love the chase it is. I don't
Speaker 1: know if that's a good thing, a bad thing, if
Speaker 1: it's feminist, if it's not. But I just think that
Speaker 1: most men want what they don't think they can have.
Speaker 3: And I think that's super nature eneral.
Speaker 4: Yeah, but yeah, I could definitely see that with men,
Speaker 4: especially when I mean personally, when I was younger, I
Speaker 4: definitely had that.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's changed for me, definitely.
Speaker 3: Changes older and older.
Speaker 2: Really Yeah, Yeah, when I was like early you know,
Speaker 2: early twenties, whatever you want to say, that really was
Speaker 2: like that, but then as time has gone on, it's like, okay,
Speaker 2: kind of like some of that, but not not too
Speaker 2: much because.
Speaker 1: Not you you want a bitch, but like you want
Speaker 1: someone who's not how I.
Speaker 2: Was going to say it, but yes, yeah, but just
Speaker 2: you know, it's just as soon as you are with
Speaker 2: someone and it's like right off the bat, they're just
Speaker 2: infatuated with you.
Speaker 1: And I'm kind of stay turn off.
Speaker 2: It is for me unfortunately, and I hate to say
Speaker 2: that because it's flattering, and like.
Speaker 3: You, I know what it is.
Speaker 1: Do you watch need it? No?
Speaker 2: I really watch TV.
Speaker 1: I can't these two. I can't. How how did you
Speaker 1: guys end? Yes, it's Bravo. Well, there's a couple on
Speaker 1: it right now and she is just way too upfront
Speaker 1: with in terms of how she feels and wanting to
Speaker 1: get serious too soon. But anyway, no, I think that's
Speaker 1: that's really interesting. So girls that play a little hard
Speaker 1: to get.
Speaker 4: Yeah, well, I think the unfortunate thing about well, I
Speaker 4: wouldn't say unfortunate, but the interesting thing about this show
Speaker 4: is we filmed it all in one month, so you know,
Speaker 4: by the end of it, people either had to come
Speaker 4: out of their show, like that right, or stay reserved.
Speaker 4: So it's okay, interesting to see how everybody kind of
Speaker 4: plays out after having that discussion.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's really like read six months compressed at the
Speaker 2: one dating, you know, because.
Speaker 3: You've got to get right into it.
Speaker 2: You're talking about like really serious. So I'll never do
Speaker 2: that like in a normal.
Speaker 1: Dating situation, right, No, that's very true. So interesting. I'm
Speaker 1: just picturing what I would tell my daughter if she
Speaker 1: was going on like I would definitely tell her to
Speaker 1: play hard to get. But how do you do that
Speaker 1: in a month when you're supposed to get to know
Speaker 1: everyone and get your cards out on the table. All right?
Speaker 1: So what kind of marriages do you guys come from?
Speaker 1: Tell me a little bit about your parents. Have they
Speaker 1: ever been parents? Still together?
Speaker 2: My parents would? They've been together forty six years? I think, wow,
Speaker 2: never even considered it.
Speaker 1: Forty six years. They started young.
Speaker 2: Yeah, my dad's early seventies and my mom's getting close
Speaker 2: to seventy.
Speaker 1: You have boost too, sisters.
Speaker 2: There's four of us. I'm the youngest and.
Speaker 1: You're the youngest, right, Okay, coming together now? Got it?
Speaker 1: Very strong, Maria and they very strong? Happy, Yes, Niver,
Speaker 1: fight come on, I swear. Really, Oh my god, I
Speaker 1: feel bad for the girl you end up with.
Speaker 2: It's tough to compare. But my dad's still gets upset
Speaker 2: she's gone for more than a day or two.
Speaker 1: Really, that's very cool.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I love that. I know it's getting rid of
Speaker 2: these days. So that's it's really cool to come from that.
Speaker 3: That seems like quite a fairy tale marriage.
Speaker 2: Yeah, really, it really is.
Speaker 4: Well, my parents are is probably more I wouldn't no,
Speaker 4: not no offense to you, but like more realistic in
Speaker 4: the sense they do fight obviously, but they always make
Speaker 4: up before bed. That's one of the big things.
Speaker 1: Really.
Speaker 4: Yeah, and they've been together for multiple years as well.
Speaker 4: I come from six siblings, so I think that was
Speaker 4: one of the biggest He is a glue that held
Speaker 4: our whole family to better. Is just having a lot
Speaker 4: of siblings.
Speaker 1: You guys grew up one of you in California. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I can't say it, abyss. How do you say it?
Speaker 2: San Louis obispo?
Speaker 1: You say's slow for sure, San Leuis obispo.
Speaker 2: Slow is a good abbreviation people, so.
Speaker 1: Slow, okay, And then Saint Louis Saint Louis right, Yeah,
Speaker 1: So I'm just picturing these marriages and these lives and
Speaker 1: these kids, and it all seems very wholesome and very
Speaker 1: small towns. I don't know that much about San Louis.
Speaker 2: It is like fifty thousand people, so it's smaller, but
Speaker 2: it's a college of town. There's a lot of stuff
Speaker 2: going on there still so of good mix of both.
Speaker 1: Okay, I'm just trying to If I say the Walton,
Speaker 1: do you won't even know what I'm talking about, right,
Speaker 1: Oh my.
Speaker 2: God, the Walton.
Speaker 1: It was a show that I watched about this fan
Speaker 1: and they lived on a farm, and they would so
Speaker 1: wholesome and whatever. So you lived. It sounds to me
Speaker 1: like even though different states sort of similar worlds may
Speaker 1: be very country.
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, it seems like it, you know, the country
Speaker 3: for me.
Speaker 1: Actually not very countryport or really not that way. Oh
Speaker 1: they're not okay, yeah, okay, yeah. And in these towns though,
Speaker 1: you guys, I'm picturing you dating a lot. I'm picturing
Speaker 1: you guys, neither one of you having a problem meeting girls.
Speaker 4: Well, it's you know, I wouldn't consider Saint Louis a
Speaker 4: small town, but right people like to consider it a
Speaker 4: big small town. Everybody knows everybody. The one question you
Speaker 4: asked when find out somebody's from Saint Louis is what
Speaker 4: high school did.
Speaker 3: You go to?
Speaker 4: Really, and then you can immediately gauge who they knew,
Speaker 4: where they came from, what realiation they usually are.
Speaker 3: Yeah, so that's you. That's where I grew up.
Speaker 1: See, I didn't picture. I know, I wasn't really talking
Speaker 1: about Saint Louis. If you guys lived in very small
Speaker 1: like I say, I'm from Houston, I'm only from Sugarland,
Speaker 1: like there's it's just sort of small, like but Californ
Speaker 1: in Saint Louis so not small small but no.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 4: The thing with the reason I'm on Farmer wants a
Speaker 4: Wife is because my mom grew up on a farm
Speaker 4: that's been our family for five generations about an hour
Speaker 4: and a half south of Saint Louis, and my grandfather
Speaker 4: still lives there, and I go down there and help
Speaker 4: them out where I can, and you know, ultimately want to.
Speaker 3: Live that lifestyle.
Speaker 1: Cool.
Speaker 4: So she was in the city and met my dad
Speaker 4: on a Fourth of July party and then she stuck around.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 1: So dating apps, tell me about your experience. How do
Speaker 1: you use them? What's your experience been.
Speaker 3: I don't know how to put it down into one word. Interesting.
Speaker 4: Yeah, Tender and Bumble. We're definitely younger apps that I used,
Speaker 4: like high school, college and stuff like that.
Speaker 3: And then I kind of moved just towards airing it
Speaker 3: down on the Hinge.
Speaker 4: Yeah, but I haven't had Hinge for like, you know
Speaker 4: and a half two years now, so why it just
Speaker 4: started to get ridiculous. You know, nobody was actually really
Speaker 4: on there to date. You know, it's just more of
Speaker 4: a let's go get a drink and hook up.
Speaker 1: Yeah, so okay, interesting, but it was fun. Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: it sounds fun.
Speaker 2: And I've virtually never had any dating apps. I think,
Speaker 2: like when Tender first came out, like I don't know,
Speaker 2: ten years ago, I had it for like a week
Speaker 2: or two. Okay, but just not my style whatsoever. I
Speaker 2: just I think I'm really social. I love being out
Speaker 2: and like beating girls and like that's fun, like the
Speaker 2: experience of it or the thrill, you know, like walking
Speaker 2: up to a random girl at a bar like that
Speaker 2: kind of stuff.
Speaker 1: I mean, I have to tell you, I'm looking at
Speaker 1: you guys, and I'm picturing that I don't know who
Speaker 1: couldn't you go on Farmer Wants a White Like I
Speaker 1: would think that you're both overwhelmed with dates, like I
Speaker 1: can't imagine, like girls are just they must have gone crazy.
Speaker 2: Well, I don't know.
Speaker 1: This is also on video, so you guys are going
Speaker 1: to see what I'm talking about. But I've never seen
Speaker 1: two more adorable boys and sweet with good families.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, were very blessed. I think of the both
Speaker 2: of us, you know.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, I have a daughter. Okay, we'll talk after
Speaker 1: the show.
Speaker 3: To go on the show.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, yeah, she's not leaving me. She's not leaving
Speaker 1: New Jersey. Tell me a little bit about you know,
Speaker 1: getting on the show. Were you excited to meet all
Speaker 1: these women like you must have been a little intimidating
Speaker 1: all at once, real life women, real life dates. You know,
Speaker 1: we're you nervous?
Speaker 4: Yeah, extremely. We walked into this big great room where
Speaker 4: we had will just see the ladies for the first time.
Speaker 1: Were that it was everybody is everybody mid twenties, early thirties.
Speaker 4: Yeah, you got to mine were yeah, yeah, kind of
Speaker 4: got to ask.
Speaker 2: That's what name you did?
Speaker 1: Well, because it's funny because I got I have a
Speaker 1: question for you guys a little bit. I was gonna
Speaker 1: ask a little bit later, but why not just jump
Speaker 1: right in? Have you ever dated older women?
Speaker 3: Yeah, couple within the same like year.
Speaker 1: That's not older within the same year.
Speaker 4: You just said, yeah, like I was ninety nine, so
Speaker 4: like usually within ninety nine, ninety eight, ninety seven.
Speaker 1: Got it. I'm meant older, like old or older. Now,
Speaker 1: I think maybe put that, you know what. I think
Speaker 1: maybe our producers wanted me to ask, just to like
Speaker 1: humiliate myself, like I'm not looking for a long time,
Speaker 1: very cute.
Speaker 2: But she's all specifically yeah, specifically, No, it's we're like
Speaker 2: four years.
Speaker 1: I think that does not count.
Speaker 2: You guys have never dated older?
Speaker 1: Okay, so all right, let's just talk also a little
Speaker 1: bit about the fact that you are farmers. And I'm
Speaker 1: thinking that it's that part of why it's you know,
Speaker 1: been hard to you know, maybe nail something down get
Speaker 1: because you're so busy with your farming.
Speaker 2: I would not say that for me. I can't speak
Speaker 2: for John, but I do live in somewhat of a
Speaker 2: smaller area and I did grow up and there's one
Speaker 2: high school there, and so when I was like early
Speaker 2: twenties at college, ten too, So there's like new girls
Speaker 2: moving into the area all the time, so like there's
Speaker 2: way more opportunities. But then now that I'm like thirty
Speaker 2: or almost thirty one, it's like, okay, well college girls
Speaker 2: are too young, yeah and so, and it's like, all right,
Speaker 2: who actually lives here and is like you know, so
Speaker 2: that starts to really narrow it down. And then you know,
Speaker 2: I either grew up with them already or dated them
Speaker 2: before my friend.
Speaker 1: Did, or so that's interesting. Huh.
Speaker 2: Yeah, So this opportunity came up, and it's like, well,
Speaker 2: you could meet someone from like my gals were from
Speaker 2: all over the country.
Speaker 1: So so do you are you looking also for someone
Speaker 1: who will be into the farming lifestyle whatever that is.
Speaker 4: So, I know, Matt and I talked about this a lot.
Speaker 4: We're not like the lifestyle, yes, but.
Speaker 1: What's the lifestyle in terms of like.
Speaker 3: Wyat yeah quiet.
Speaker 2: It was traditional so much aimed at the work. Like
Speaker 2: a lot of people on the show, we were focusing
Speaker 2: on like the farm work, ye, like the living, like
Speaker 2: living in the country, you know, raising my children in
Speaker 2: those types of areas, and like the big thing for
Speaker 2: us is like I really love all of our neighbors.
Speaker 2: Like all the other neighbors are families who farm and
Speaker 2: ranch and a really good people and so like, you know,
Speaker 2: the kids my nephews go to school, if like they're
Speaker 2: these neighbor kids that they all play with and it's
Speaker 2: like just such a good life.
Speaker 1: You know, you have like nine nieces and.
Speaker 2: Nephews and a god daughter and like twenty other kids
Speaker 2: that think I'm on their uncle.
Speaker 1: Do you like maybe you've got like some biological clock
Speaker 1: thing going on here, Like the kids thing is, yeah.
Speaker 4: I want kids pretty quick. Once I get married, it's
Speaker 4: going to be we're going to start rifleing.
Speaker 2: Yeah, but I want to, you know, kids, since I
Speaker 2: was really always wanted to be a dad.
Speaker 1: Really it's very cool. So you guys are just right
Speaker 1: for the picking. I'm okay, So anyway nice because I
Speaker 1: mean you both could be I don't know. I know again,
Speaker 1: I've got a son your age around your age, and
Speaker 1: he has zero interest. He's just having himself a good
Speaker 1: old time. He's not like thinking eventually, I know he
Speaker 1: wants that we'll enjoy.
Speaker 3: Why you got it?
Speaker 2: Yeah, I will say, like one thing. So up moved
Speaker 2: to Austin, Texas for.
Speaker 1: A bit I graduated from your tea, did you Okay.
Speaker 2: So you know what it's like there? Then yeah, But
Speaker 2: I moved there, and I I felt way younger all
Speaker 2: of a sudden, because there's a lot of people, like,
Speaker 2: you know, older than I am that are still single
Speaker 2: and like going out and there all stuff. So like,
Speaker 2: all of a sudden, thirty is like pretty young in
Speaker 2: that scene.
Speaker 1: Like thirty is really young.
Speaker 2: Yeah, but like comparatively so yeah yeah. And then but
Speaker 2: when I'm back home, it's like it's totally different. So
Speaker 2: really depending on where you live, too, like you feel
Speaker 2: it more.
Speaker 1: I think, yeah, know, we my husband was thirty six
Speaker 1: when we met, and I was I guess I was
Speaker 1: like twenty nine, and but we were living in New
Speaker 1: York City, so that felt.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, especially yeah in those places.
Speaker 1: You know, it's not So what is your favorite part
Speaker 1: about being an.
Speaker 2: Uncle, Matt? There's a lot lots of it, But I'm
Speaker 2: just happy to be so close with them. I feel
Speaker 2: like I've had a hand in raising all of them
Speaker 2: in a way, you know, and I know how much
Speaker 2: I mean to them, and so you know, like I
Speaker 2: did move away for a couple of years, and it's
Speaker 2: like I think The thing that really broke the straw
Speaker 2: for me moving home was my nephew Jack was like,
Speaker 2: I was like, Hey, how's there everything going back at home?
Speaker 2: He's like, it's really good, but there's just always a
Speaker 2: little something missing. And I was like, like, I think
Speaker 2: I want to move home.
Speaker 1: John, your five siblings, you got this kind of the
Speaker 1: same big family thing going on.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 4: Yeah, basically most my oldest sibling and then my two
Speaker 4: closest younger ones are all out of the house New York,
Speaker 4: LA and in college. And then so the two younger
Speaker 4: ones are still in Saint Louis with me and the
Speaker 4: rest of the family, and they call me brother dad,
Speaker 4: oh my parents. You know, it's time's going on. I've
Speaker 4: taken a more lenient approach with the younger ones, and.
Speaker 1: You don't, and you're not having it.
Speaker 3: I'm not having it.
Speaker 1: Is that important to you that whoever you meet and
Speaker 1: eventually Mary also have really want to be part of
Speaker 1: a big family, not like an extended family. Did that
Speaker 1: come up on the show? Did you ask that question?
Speaker 2: Yeah?
Speaker 3: Family was definitely a big conversation, and.
Speaker 2: You can pretty quickly tell with with people, I think
Speaker 2: and talking to girls like how much they care about
Speaker 2: that or not.
Speaker 1: And does it matter if they came from a close
Speaker 1: family or no, No, as.
Speaker 2: Long as they're open to it a lot as they like,
Speaker 2: because I feel like I've met girls who didn't have
Speaker 2: a big family and then they like love that I do. Yeah,
Speaker 2: it's not that they came from that.
Speaker 1: But yeah, what are some of your deal breakers? What
Speaker 1: were some of your deal breakers? Like, I mean, when
Speaker 1: you were making your list, was there anything that you're
Speaker 1: like and not this not interested in a woman who's
Speaker 1: high maintenance or I don't know, I'm.
Speaker 4: Just insecurity was a big thing for me because that
Speaker 4: translates to a lot of different stuff. So if they're
Speaker 4: insecure about themselves, it's usually just going to reflect very
Speaker 4: poorly relationship.
Speaker 2: Yeah, mine, I think is not something I could really
Speaker 2: like you could type down necessarily. But respect is like
Speaker 2: the biggest thing for me because so many I don't
Speaker 2: want to say girls and sounds nice, but like so
Speaker 2: many people these days just don't have a respect for
Speaker 2: each other in relationships. And whether that's like posting like
Speaker 2: an inappropriate photo of yourself online while you're with one,
Speaker 2: or just the way you speak to somebody in conversation
Speaker 2: or just how you, you know, conduct yourself out in
Speaker 2: the world of DTA girls in the past that are
Speaker 2: just like doing their own thing, and it's like society
Speaker 2: has changed a little bit, I think. So it feels normal,
Speaker 2: but it's just I think disrespectful. Honestly, if you're with
Speaker 2: someone like you should care about what how they feel
Speaker 2: and like what they want, and yeah, that's just a
Speaker 2: big thing lack in these days. I think.
Speaker 4: I think a big indicator of that if you take
Speaker 4: them to dinner and have them order their own food
Speaker 4: and drinks and stuff, and see how they treat the
Speaker 4: waiters and waitresses. It's usually a good indicator of how
Speaker 4: they respect others. There's people that treat poor media turn
Speaker 4: off or anything like that.
Speaker 3: Anybody.
Speaker 1: You're both perfect. I don't even know what to say.
Speaker 1: I feel so I cannot imagine being part of this
Speaker 1: group of was there fighting with these girls?
Speaker 2: Of course, So you put a bunch of women in
Speaker 2: this same house trying to date the same guy, of
Speaker 2: course there's going to be issues.
Speaker 1: I mean they're listening. There are other dating shows so
Speaker 1: that that obviously, and you see that happen.
Speaker 2: There's a lot of competition, but this one I always
Speaker 2: say I was super impressed with all the women the
Speaker 2: whole time for how they handled situations within each other
Speaker 2: and like how well they got along, like they all
Speaker 2: were friends too, and like some of them still are
Speaker 2: to this day. That was pretty cool because just like
Speaker 2: I said, like how they're if I'm you know, one
Speaker 2: of these girls is treating the other ones poorly in
Speaker 2: the house, it's like not a good sign.
Speaker 1: I love the I love that whole like waiter thing
Speaker 1: that is the biggest turnoff. Yeah, it's awful anybody in
Speaker 1: the service industry. I mean I was a waitress for years,
Speaker 1: but even I like, yeah, it's awful.
Speaker 4: Translates to the rest of your life. It's not just
Speaker 4: treating you know, people in service industry, and we have.
Speaker 2: Like you know, employees on the ranch and all kinds
Speaker 2: of different people come through there. So it's like some
Speaker 2: of the girls like funny story, like, uh, Mario's this
Speaker 2: guy we've had work on the ranch for twenty years
Speaker 2: and just read this quadrontle day whatever. But like some
Speaker 2: of the girls treated him so well, Like it was
Speaker 2: cool to see that. I'm like really like that, you know,
Speaker 2: like he works his butt off here and he means
Speaker 2: a lot to our family, and so they could have
Speaker 2: totally just you know, disregarded him, which some of them
Speaker 2: may have, but like, you know, a lot a few
Speaker 2: of them were like went out of their way to like.
Speaker 1: You know, you guys are both like you giggle at
Speaker 1: each other's stuff, and I have a feeling like there's
Speaker 1: so much behind the scenes, like I love to just
Speaker 1: be do you guys say, in the house together or
Speaker 1: so we were separated us.
Speaker 3: In California as in Missouri, so.
Speaker 2: You guys weren't interacting with all the time production teams. Yeah,
Speaker 2: but three different times throughout the filming we'd fly and
Speaker 2: meet each other with all the girls on us at
Speaker 2: the mutual place for a couple of days. Then we
Speaker 2: talk shopping.
Speaker 1: Got it. This particular podcast that you have come on
Speaker 1: today is we usually are talking to people who are
Speaker 1: divorced or who've been widowed, but but love the second
Speaker 1: timer around. You know, what do you think are sort
Speaker 1: of key elements in terms of making a marriage work?
Speaker 1: And hopefully you all will never be on this podcast
Speaker 1: for that reason it won't be your second time around,
Speaker 1: But do you have any inkling in terms of like
Speaker 1: what happens in marriages and why they sometimes go awry
Speaker 1: or what's necessary to have.
Speaker 2: I don't want to speak for anyone else. Obviously, I
Speaker 2: have not been married and not been through divorce, so
Speaker 2: you know, there's all kinds of different scenarios and reasons,
Speaker 2: and I'm no person to judge whatsoever based on that.
Speaker 2: I've dated a girl in the past that was divorced
Speaker 2: and she was amazing, so no fault to that. But
Speaker 2: I think goes back to what I said about just
Speaker 2: respect and people to me these days are so self
Speaker 2: centered and like what they want and what they're looking
Speaker 2: for that you know, really you should be thinking like
Speaker 2: how can I be a better partner to the person
Speaker 2: that I'm with? You're killing me And that all gets.
Speaker 1: Back you're killing me both of you.
Speaker 2: That all goes back to God. I think if you
Speaker 2: have eleven ors for God, then you too will put
Speaker 2: each other better.
Speaker 1: Amazing. You can't top that, but go ahead and try.
Speaker 3: Well, I mean I'll try.
Speaker 4: But I agree with him in the beginning where he
Speaker 4: said everybody's situations are different, so no judgment whatsoever. And
Speaker 4: I have no personal experience with a marriage.
Speaker 3: I've never been married.
Speaker 4: But the way I see my parents do. It is
Speaker 4: obviously they always make up before bed, and then they
Speaker 4: both going into the marriage realized and still realize that
Speaker 4: it's a partnership. You know, it's not one person.
Speaker 3: Being there. I don't know where I'm going with that.
Speaker 1: No, I know what you're saying. It goes back to
Speaker 1: respect and to right.
Speaker 3: You're one person. Yeah, you're just not two separate people together.
Speaker 3: It's like it's one person.
Speaker 4: Sorry, buy us a sacrifice where the other falls short
Speaker 4: and stuff like that.
Speaker 1: Right, right, So I'm sorry, but we're going to have
Speaker 1: to be a little more salacious. Now, guys, what can
Speaker 1: you tell me? What can't you tell me? Are you
Speaker 1: allowed to tell me there are any spoilers?
Speaker 3: Why don't you just ask the question somebody?
Speaker 2: Now we can't say, right exactly, we're going to ask question,
Speaker 2: why are you even ask? Okay?
Speaker 1: Were there were you guys? As hard was it? Did
Speaker 1: it come down to like their two girls that it
Speaker 1: came down to or three girls?
Speaker 3: And it was tough?
Speaker 1: It was.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 4: At the beginning when we met all eight, it was
Speaker 4: a little easier, especially because you only got to spend
Speaker 4: ten minutes with the person, right, But then as time
Speaker 4: went on, you started to build these, you know, stronger
Speaker 4: relationships with each and every girl. It started to get
Speaker 4: really tough, especially at the end when it was down
Speaker 4: to like three and two and stuff.
Speaker 1: Like you when I say, is there, are you happy
Speaker 1: with how it all wrapped up? You are? You both
Speaker 1: met someone I'm guessing I said, yeah, that's it because
Speaker 1: we never had friends before. About yourselves, guys going through
Speaker 1: the experience, let me.
Speaker 2: Think about that. One The hardest thing I already knew
Speaker 2: this about myself was but I don't really like getting
Speaker 2: into like talking about my feelings, you know, especially on TV.
Speaker 2: That was really hard because you're like daily they're like prying,
Speaker 2: like what what do you really feel about this girl?
Speaker 2: That was difficult for me to do.
Speaker 1: Do you come from a family where people where you
Speaker 1: guys talk about feelings a lot or is it just.
Speaker 2: So much right now? Not really like ever my family
Speaker 2: about a feeling. My family is like loving, but we
Speaker 2: don't like get too much or anything like that. So, yeah,
Speaker 2: that was difficult for me.
Speaker 1: You guys affectionate, Yeah, yeah, interesting ways, but I don't
Speaker 1: know what that means.
Speaker 3: Yeah, like fighting all the time.
Speaker 2: Each other? Okay, yeah, I love.
Speaker 3: You, but I want.
Speaker 4: My dad told me, you know, he's been looking at
Speaker 4: all these pictures his way of complimenting me, as he says,
Speaker 4: he wants to slap the.
Speaker 2: Ship out of you. That's what my family. Families are
Speaker 2: both like that. We would never say.
Speaker 1: Anything like just like gross, like like you're just I
Speaker 1: can just imagine, like my family, if someone did this,
Speaker 1: we would just tear that person's shreds.
Speaker 3: NonStop.
Speaker 1: I love that though, But you.
Speaker 3: Know what keep it coming comming.
Speaker 1: So wait, so did you learn anything about yourself?
Speaker 4: I guess I learned more what I really wanted, you know,
Speaker 4: going into the show, like I said, we have those
Speaker 4: preferences and everything, but going through it and having to
Speaker 4: talk about it every single day from dawn till dusk,
Speaker 4: you kind of have a more narrow sense of what
Speaker 4: you actually are looking.
Speaker 1: For, what stood out the most, So by the end
Speaker 1: of it, like what what made sense that maybe didn't before,
Speaker 1: Like I really want to like in terms of when
Speaker 1: you got close to finding that that one woman, this
Speaker 1: is what I like. I didn't even realize I liked it,
Speaker 1: but this is so important to me or anything.
Speaker 4: I think it just goes back to what I said
Speaker 4: earlier about just being able to get along with somebody. Yeah,
Speaker 4: you know, you come in with all these high expectations,
Speaker 4: but in the end, you know, if you guys can't
Speaker 4: really get along, it's not really going to work out. So,
Speaker 4: you know, especially if you're going to get married, you're
Speaker 4: going to be spending a lot of time with each other.
Speaker 3: So there's true plenty of things to learn, that's true.
Speaker 4: Used to so as long as you guys get along
Speaker 4: right off the bat, right, it's usually okay.
Speaker 2: Yeah, mine, mine. I've been thinking about how to describe
Speaker 2: this for years, but mine is just such like this
Speaker 2: mental thing, like I feel like I can almost just
Speaker 2: like look at someone and know, like are we thinking
Speaker 2: the same thing right now? You know, And it's like
Speaker 2: this like I don't know how you put that into
Speaker 2: words or describe that, but like this connection And I've
Speaker 2: really hardly ever felt that with girls, you know, yeah,
Speaker 2: throughout my life maybe a couple of times, you know, And.
Speaker 1: So like, yeah, did you get to feel that on
Speaker 1: the show.
Speaker 2: Well, you know, it's certainly possible, okay, but trying, but yeah,
Speaker 2: it's like I've dated girls that I thought I really
Speaker 2: liked before and then like as time has gone on,
Speaker 2: I'm like, wait, maybe like that it is not really
Speaker 2: there as much as I thought.
Speaker 1: You know, yep, did you have a specific physical type
Speaker 1: like in your past? Did you always gravitate towards a
Speaker 1: specific physical type or no? Yes?
Speaker 2: No, generally yes, but I'm not like, oh, I only
Speaker 2: like are only like that's like that's not so much that,
Speaker 2: it's more of like careful, be careful.
Speaker 3: Lying here.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 2: No, I'm really into my health and like fitness, and obviously.
Speaker 1: You like thin girls. Yes, yeah, okay, that's no, you didn't.
Speaker 2: Just someone that's like that's important to me. It's like
Speaker 2: my health and coolness, and I want someone that aligns
Speaker 2: with that.
Speaker 4: So yeah, somebody who's confident in themselves too. Yeah, it's mate,
Speaker 4: it's massive.
Speaker 2: I'm a sucker for a girl that's like really stylish
Speaker 2: and trendy. Yeah, I don't know why.
Speaker 1: I love that? Yeah are you?
Speaker 3: Yeah? Of course?
Speaker 1: Yeah. So the stylish thing, the fit thing. You got
Speaker 1: to give me something over here? What else physically?
Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm not going to get myself trouble.
Speaker 4: You want to talk about hair color, I'll say hair color, okay, okay,
Speaker 4: we'll give you that.
Speaker 3: I think I gravitate more towards.
Speaker 1: Blondes responds, Okay, fifty to fifty on that one.
Speaker 3: Okay, I'm not going to say, but that's just based short's.
Speaker 1: All right, whatever, you guys are impossible.
Speaker 3: You're smart.
Speaker 1: You guys, you are smart guys. You're gonna get all
Speaker 1: these are gonna have to watch to find out what
Speaker 1: it is it turns you want. So before I let
Speaker 1: you guys go, I have a question that sort of
Speaker 1: goes back to what we were talking about in at
Speaker 1: the beginning here, but so on the show, I would
Speaker 1: think that the women have to be a little more forward,
Speaker 1: don't They have sort of come to you?
Speaker 2: Right?
Speaker 1: Do you think that that's something that you like when
Speaker 1: a woman makes the first move.
Speaker 4: I guess it depends on where and how they do it.
Speaker 2: Yeah, there's different.
Speaker 1: Doesn't really bother me, No, but that's sort of how
Speaker 1: it worked, right, Definitely.
Speaker 4: Would I rather have it that way? No, But it's
Speaker 4: not like it's a turnoff or anything.
Speaker 2: I think it's It's really hard. That's hard to answer,
Speaker 2: is that it depends on how it's a situation a
Speaker 2: situation answer, it depends in the past, had a girl
Speaker 2: like approached me, but then just did it so well
Speaker 2: like that I was still into it, you know, versus
Speaker 2: you could do it and be like way over the
Speaker 2: top and like hi, like hey around and all that
Speaker 2: stuff and they're like, oh okay, this is a lot.
Speaker 2: But I've had it too where a girl just like
Speaker 2: has says some smart remark to me that walks away
Speaker 2: and I'm like, oh okay, hell.
Speaker 4: I don't recommend it for a girl though, because a
Speaker 4: guy doesn't put in as much effort to impress them.
Speaker 1: Guys. I appreciate this. I agree, I could guys don't
Speaker 1: do that much anymore because they you know what. I
Speaker 1: think that that just is true, and it's not true
Speaker 1: for everybody, and it's not an absolute, but I think
Speaker 1: that in terms of my experience, I think that men
Speaker 1: do tend to want to take the lead right and
Speaker 1: sort of again want what they think that they can't have.
Speaker 1: And yeah, there's all this hunter gatherer philosophy behind it all, right,
Speaker 1: like a hunters win are gatherers.
Speaker 2: Unfortunately, a lot of guys I don't think they're doing
Speaker 2: that as much these days.
Speaker 1: Yeah they're not making the first move, well they are.
Speaker 4: But they'll like an Instagram story and yeah, they you know, really.
Speaker 2: I remember my brothers he's twelve years older than me,
Speaker 2: but all his buddies when they'd go out and they'd
Speaker 2: be talking like, oh, I went up to this girl
Speaker 2: to night or I said this, and like then now,
Speaker 2: I like compare that to like my friends or even
Speaker 2: younger guys, and I'm like, they're not really doing that
Speaker 2: at all, hardly.
Speaker 1: This is such a big conversation and I have so
Speaker 1: much and you guys are going to have to come
Speaker 1: back because I think that what you're saying right now
Speaker 1: is fascinating and I feel like young men today, it's
Speaker 1: a really big problem that they are swiping, swiping, swiping.
Speaker 1: I think there's a lot of problems with self esteem
Speaker 1: in that. I think that it is has created a
Speaker 1: scenario where you know, you have to go out, you
Speaker 1: have to it has to be face to face, you
Speaker 1: got to get rejected, you got to make good decisions,
Speaker 1: you got to make bad decisions. All of that I
Speaker 1: think is so important. And when you're you know, in
Speaker 1: the basement, swiping, swiping, it's it's just it's yeah, I
Speaker 1: think it is a huge problem, but not our problem. Today.
Speaker 1: We will be watching than John, Thank you, Thank you, guys.
Speaker 1: So much. Are you ready to get back out there
Speaker 1: and date again. Having a hard time getting started and
Speaker 1: need some guidance. Our team is here to help. Call
Speaker 1: us or email us, follow us on socials. All the
Speaker 1: information will be in the show notes. Make sure to
Speaker 1: rate and review the podcast. I Do Part two an
Speaker 1: iHeartRadio podcast where falling in love is the main objective.