Speaker 1: Wynnie Cummings is a stand up comedian, actress, writer, director, producer,
Speaker 1: and fellow podcaster. She is amazing. She is pregnant. She
Speaker 1: is entertaining. She is talented. She is smart. She is outspoken.
Speaker 1: She is unfiltered. She has had an incredible career. She
Speaker 1: has starred in shows like Two Broke Girls, released seven
Speaker 1: comedy specials, published a book, and is the host of
Speaker 1: the podcast Good for You Now. She's ready for the
Speaker 1: next chapter in her life as a mom. This is
Speaker 1: just be with Whitney Cummings. Let's get into it.
Speaker 2: I am so sorry, I am late.
Speaker 1: I don't care at all.
Speaker 3: You're like the person who's approval I weirdly care about
Speaker 3: the most. On some level, I was thinking about you, though.
Speaker 3: So I put this Zoom podcast in my calendar while
Speaker 3: I was in Austin, Texas.
Speaker 2: So I thought I had two more hours and time zone.
Speaker 1: Shit's been happening a lot lately. Wait, so the clip
Speaker 1: is not in the back of our head It's at
Speaker 1: the front, which is the headline. Like, I've never seen
Speaker 1: someone with the clips so forward.
Speaker 2: Oh my hair clip?
Speaker 3: Okay, So I need to okay one thing at a time.
Speaker 3: I was just making a bagel, thinking about you. I
Speaker 3: think about you every time I make a bagel.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, I'm famous for bagels.
Speaker 2: Yes, you are infamous, more than famous, famous and infamous.
Speaker 2: So I do my clip like this, I can't. I
Speaker 2: do a very high pony okay, high on the side.
Speaker 2: It's like a mini facelift. Okay.
Speaker 3: And then I twist, twist, twist, put it in the front,
Speaker 3: roll it like a hot dog, move it back.
Speaker 2: And then and then clip it like that.
Speaker 1: Okay. I like it. And because also that means you
Speaker 1: have to have nice clip. That means it gives use
Speaker 1: to the nice clips that you buy. And and and
Speaker 1: you're pregnant.
Speaker 3: And I'm pregnant. I just started I got I started
Speaker 3: buying these hair clips. I used to do the J
Speaker 3: Crew ones. Those were so expensive and I would lose them.
Speaker 2: I found these.
Speaker 3: I don't know where, but I saw this hack on
Speaker 3: TikTok where you can use a hairclip to be a
Speaker 3: tripod for your phone.
Speaker 2: Same, So that's why I bought these.
Speaker 1: It's so smart. And you have that little wallet on
Speaker 1: your phone that I got too. Did they send that
Speaker 1: to you? I think they might have sent that to me.
Speaker 1: It's like a wallet, and you can put a purse
Speaker 1: and make a phone purse.
Speaker 3: Okay, so the purse phone wallet thing, I'm very picky about.
Speaker 3: I'm sure someone has maybe sent one, but I'm very
Speaker 3: specific about the.
Speaker 2: Kind I like.
Speaker 3: I do the bandelier, it only has a thing for
Speaker 3: credit cards.
Speaker 2: That's it. You're right.
Speaker 1: I bought that one. I bought it. I didn't get sented.
Speaker 1: It was case logic, that's sent. I bought that and
Speaker 1: I bought a strap to go with it, and I started.
Speaker 1: I did like three walks and then stopped, and I
Speaker 1: felt like, you're that mom. Now you're that bitch. Now
Speaker 1: that has a purse phone.
Speaker 2: It's a new pocket protector. Everyone thinks you're a loser.
Speaker 3: But I always know where my phone is because what
Speaker 3: I used to do is I would always have my
Speaker 3: phone playing music or a podcast, so I could always
Speaker 3: find it. I always always have it. I could be
Speaker 3: giving myself a very cancer, but I.
Speaker 2: Always wear it on my person.
Speaker 1: Yes, okay, I got to get back to that, except
Speaker 1: they had vandalier. You have to find a way to
Speaker 1: put the charger, like you could have the charger somehow,
Speaker 1: because you have to make a choice, like you're either
Speaker 1: charging or you're pursing.
Speaker 2: Yeah, but there's uh, there's a charger report on the bottom.
Speaker 1: No, like the extra charger that you could jolt in
Speaker 1: the middle of the day, or like that little apple
Speaker 1: thing that you can attach. They could really get.
Speaker 2: You mean you need a charge charger, a charge charger.
Speaker 3: Okay, well, then I might take you downstairs and show
Speaker 3: you this new contraption I started using.
Speaker 1: Okay, well, I can see we haven't even gotten into
Speaker 1: the interview, but this is great.
Speaker 2: Wait.
Speaker 1: I have a water purse too, because if you're going
Speaker 1: through the airport, it's a per it's a water bottle
Speaker 1: that has a purse strap. So you've got two things
Speaker 1: going on. Okay, she goes, she's walking, and she's walking,
Speaker 1: and she's walking, and.
Speaker 2: We're walking through my house. Because I am at this
Speaker 2: point a Karen. I am so sick of these Silicon
Speaker 2: Valley dorks. Hold on, I'm sick of.
Speaker 1: She's trying to one up me.
Speaker 2: Okay, sorry, sorry.
Speaker 1: The water purse triggered her.
Speaker 2: Now that I've seen your TikTok and how sort of
Speaker 2: intimate it is, I'm fearless. Now there's nothing I won't
Speaker 2: put on the internet. After what I've seen you do
Speaker 2: to a bagel.
Speaker 1: This entire interview is going to be based off of
Speaker 1: your twenty five things you don't know about me, And
Speaker 1: I want to give us Weekly a shout out because
Speaker 1: I've learned so much about so many people from that list.
Speaker 2: That's the other one.
Speaker 3: I like that one too, But I don't like it
Speaker 3: when people don't tell their secrets. Tell me why you
Speaker 3: lost weight, if it's ozempic or whatever it is, I
Speaker 3: don't care.
Speaker 2: Just share it.
Speaker 3: If you have some life hack, tell everybody about it, Like,
Speaker 3: help make other people's lives easier.
Speaker 2: What is else? Is the point of being a celebrity
Speaker 2: if you can't? Okay, so this is a wow.
Speaker 1: It's they're like body chaps she's putting on.
Speaker 3: Is it's like a vest you can wear. I just
Speaker 3: I'm not wearing underwear that has all these little pouches
Speaker 3: and then you zip it and it's actually a cute
Speaker 3: little vest and you can put it over anything.
Speaker 2: And so I'll put the charge charger in.
Speaker 3: One, I'll put the phone in the other, and then
Speaker 3: I'll just walk around while they're charging.
Speaker 1: Okay, hold on, let's just discuss something. Okay, Is that
Speaker 1: our non pregnant people allowed to wear that.
Speaker 3: Yes, this I got before pregnancy. It's like a do
Speaker 3: you know the exercise thing people are doing now called
Speaker 3: the rucksack where you put like a backpack on of
Speaker 3: thirty pounds and you go for a walk. It's supposed
Speaker 3: to be it's supposed to be amazing for you. Because
Speaker 3: they're now finding that we're so all over the place.
Speaker 2: I love us.
Speaker 1: Oh so this is what my literally the girls said,
Speaker 1: this is what my interview with David Spade was like.
Speaker 1: It went nowhere and it never started and it never finished.
Speaker 1: It was like a free association of thought. So I'm happy.
Speaker 1: It doesn't matter what we're talking about. We're gonna get
Speaker 1: there wherever there is.
Speaker 3: We're like two puppies that finally get to play. I
Speaker 3: feel like, but I feel like your fans just want
Speaker 3: to know, like I don't know, like just want us to.
Speaker 2: Be authentic and whatever.
Speaker 3: I'm romnic and so I just throw this over something.
Speaker 2: I just throw it over something. I'm sick of carrying
Speaker 2: a purse. I'm sick of losing it.
Speaker 3: I'm sick of it turning into a flaccid ballsack when
Speaker 3: I put it down the bottom of purses are disgusting.
Speaker 3: They're too expensive. I always spill water bottles in them.
Speaker 1: Because you have to have pouch. You have to have
Speaker 1: a pouch lifestyle.
Speaker 2: I can't.
Speaker 1: Every person has to have a pouch in it. So
Speaker 1: when you go in, you either take the one pouch
Speaker 1: and transfer it or it's also shaping your bags and
Speaker 1: you're putting your lip glass and stuff, and so it's
Speaker 1: never going to hit the bottom of your nice bag.
Speaker 3: Yeah, And then you reach in and you're just like,
Speaker 3: am I about to get im paled by something?
Speaker 2: Am I about to get tetanus? But you don't have to.
Speaker 1: You can pull the pouch out and you don't have
Speaker 1: to deal with the purse. The purse is basically a
Speaker 1: facade for the interior.
Speaker 2: Yeah, but then I have to have a pouch for
Speaker 2: my pens because one of the pens is going to explode.
Speaker 2: I don't know.
Speaker 3: There's a lot of things I need to carry with me.
Speaker 3: And I also feel like I'm so psycho now about
Speaker 3: trying to stay hydrated, and there's no water bottle that's
Speaker 3: not eventually going to unscrew in your purse turn upside down.
Speaker 2: I also, have you done this yet?
Speaker 1: Where that's why you need a water purse?
Speaker 2: Is that is that a thing?
Speaker 1: I bought them? And yeah, they it's a purse. It's
Speaker 1: half the size of this bottle, and it's got a chain.
Speaker 1: It basically looks like your bandlair bag and you can
Speaker 1: carry it around.
Speaker 2: Oh like a okay, got it? Like the I don't know.
Speaker 2: We're not saving Private Ryan, Like we're not. Okay, what
Speaker 2: are you talking about?
Speaker 4: You fucking military pockets. I've met you're on the set
Speaker 4: of Masks. I've never tried to be delighted because you're
Speaker 4: a guest in my home. That's ridiculous. I do not
Speaker 4: believe you just came. We're not in saving price. You
Speaker 4: are in saving Private Ryan. That thing put them on
Speaker 4: your social media.
Speaker 1: It's not okay, let's start here. Whose baby are you
Speaker 1: carrying that?
Speaker 2: I'm not gonna tell you, but.
Speaker 1: You're like January Jones.
Speaker 2: Thank you?
Speaker 1: Do you remember like she was she was pregnant and
Speaker 1: no one knew whose baby it was.
Speaker 2: Oh that's right. No, But he's he's wonderful, and I
Speaker 2: just he's not a public person. Yeah. I have three weeks.
Speaker 3: I have three more weeks and then I'm having my
Speaker 3: I'm having my first child.
Speaker 1: Congratulations, it's the best thing.
Speaker 2: I'm terrified of childbirth, but other than that, I'm looking
Speaker 2: forward to it. Oh my, did you have when you
Speaker 2: had your daughter?
Speaker 3: Did you have like a boy name and a girl
Speaker 3: name because I'm in the market for a boy name.
Speaker 1: Yes, but they were both generic and could kind of
Speaker 1: be either. I think in the beginning, well yes, kind of. Well,
Speaker 1: Brent is not couldn't be really necessarily be a boy,
Speaker 1: but Casey was one either. And I think we changed
Speaker 1: her middle name. I think we first had her as
Speaker 1: a different middle name and then change it and had
Speaker 1: to legally change it. I changed my mind and literally
Speaker 1: she already had a legal name change, and I.
Speaker 2: Asked you, what is that? What does that look like?
Speaker 2: A couple women? I know, and it's always women. I
Speaker 2: really like they go. After like two weeks, I realized
Speaker 2: he wasn't a Solomon, he was a.
Speaker 1: Market Oh oh, that's hilarious. I know she was always
Speaker 1: she was gonna be a Brin, But I think the
Speaker 1: middle name was Alex. And the reason I wanted to
Speaker 1: change it was in case I ever had a boy,
Speaker 1: and then I wanted to save it. It's it's all blurry.
Speaker 3: Now, look, my last name is Cummings. It's a tough pairing,
Speaker 3: it's a tough handle. I wanted to name him Maximus.
Speaker 3: I realized that was not a that's not fair to him.
Speaker 3: He's going to get bullied regardless. But so I feel
Speaker 3: like there's I had a list of fifty girl names
Speaker 3: that I liked, and there's like three guy names at
Speaker 3: this point. It's like Miles, Julius Henry, Like like, I
Speaker 3: can't that's all I got.
Speaker 2: But I feel like that's whatever.
Speaker 1: Well, Miles Cummings is a great name, but also it's
Speaker 1: it's speaking to Cummings like Miles, like Miles Miles of
Speaker 1: com Yes, it's good, healthy.
Speaker 2: It's a lot of com much. Come.
Speaker 3: You need to get a woman pregnant naturally at forty,
Speaker 3: that's for sure. So yeah, didn't even put that together.
Speaker 3: So now I only have two names.
Speaker 1: I'm glad. I could be obsessed.
Speaker 3: So by the way, I feel like, anytime I see
Speaker 3: a video of a gender reveal party and it's a girl,
Speaker 3: you always see the oddest reaction of the people.
Speaker 2: You always see the dad be.
Speaker 3: A little bummed when all that pink smoke comes out.
Speaker 3: You know what I mean, he's kind of like, I
Speaker 3: just paid for a helicopter to drop pink smoke on
Speaker 3: my pool and it's a freaking girl, you know. Or
Speaker 3: if it's a boy, you'll see the guy be like like,
Speaker 3: you'll see his real reaction. I always find the awkward.
Speaker 3: And you know, three people have died in gender reveal
Speaker 3: parties so far. And three people have died, and there's
Speaker 3: been a like over eight hundred acres of forest fires
Speaker 3: from gender reveal parties. There's a really horrifying video of
Speaker 3: a guy and a plane dropping the smoke on the
Speaker 3: party and the plane just crashes. It's like it's psychotic.
Speaker 3: I don't these gender reveal parties are part they gotta stop.
Speaker 1: Well, yes, it's you know, for every birth there's a death,
Speaker 1: so I guess it's sort of symbolic there you go.
Speaker 3: But it's also wild because you know, you see people
Speaker 3: You're like, I.
Speaker 2: Guess this is for content.
Speaker 3: I guess this is so they can put it on
Speaker 3: their social media, you know. So I think we're lucky.
Speaker 3: We just get to open the fridge and start cooking
Speaker 3: it too in the morning and hit five million views.
Speaker 2: Not everyone gets to do that. Bethany it's true. It's true.
Speaker 1: That reminds me of engagements that are always documented by
Speaker 1: a group of friends.
Speaker 3: Okay, so that's a nightmare because when I got engaged,
Speaker 3: it didn't.
Speaker 2: End up working out. But when I got.
Speaker 3: Engaged, he had the photographer hiding in a bush into
Speaker 3: Penga Canyon right like, and Jason Momoa lived across the
Speaker 3: street with Lisa Bonet back when they were together, And.
Speaker 2: So the engagement happens.
Speaker 3: He gets down on one knee, there's like a horse,
Speaker 3: the whole thing.
Speaker 2: And then I was like, oh my god, I wish
Speaker 2: we had photos of that. He's like, we do. I
Speaker 2: have a photographer and a bush. I'm like what And
Speaker 2: we look over the We go over the bush, like
Speaker 2: he's not here. This is so weird. We called the photographer,
Speaker 2: we finally talked to him. He goes Jason Momoa was
Speaker 2: working out and thought I was paparazzi trying to take
Speaker 2: pictures of him, and I thought he was going to
Speaker 2: kick my ass. So I left. I wasn't able to
Speaker 2: get any.
Speaker 3: Of the photos, and so can you guys redo it?
Speaker 2: And I was like what? So we had to like
Speaker 2: fake a new spontaneous proposal and that's what I kind
Speaker 2: of knew it wasn't gonna work out.
Speaker 1: That's very Housewives, it is, that's very house Did you
Speaker 1: get a store credit?
Speaker 2: A store credit for what?
Speaker 1: Did you have to pay the guy? And then oh no.
Speaker 3: We did and we paid and it was like he
Speaker 3: was scared of Jason Momoa.
Speaker 1: I've never said this in a couple of years. You're
Speaker 1: the first person I would want to do a podcast
Speaker 1: with because we have a lot. I mean, we could
Speaker 1: talk about nothing all day.
Speaker 2: That's what Steinfeld was a show about nothing. Maybe we
Speaker 2: start the podcast about nothing.
Speaker 1: Let's just call this is nothing and this is this
Speaker 1: podcast has no point.
Speaker 3: But we've also kind of covered everything. Yeah, I think
Speaker 3: we can out do ourselves. I think we'll do it
Speaker 3: over and over again.
Speaker 2: I do. I do now, Like you know, it's interesting,
Speaker 2: like the eating disorder stuff. I look back now and
Speaker 2: I can really sort of laugh about it. I mean,
Speaker 2: the phases that I went through, and just because that
Speaker 2: eating disorder is about control. Grew up in an alcolic home.
Speaker 2: Something I never put together is that my mom definitely
Speaker 2: had an eating disorder. She was definitely interarexic.
Speaker 3: Like when you're young, you don't really, that doesn't really
Speaker 3: cross your mind.
Speaker 2: No.
Speaker 3: You know, our fridge had like two arted chokes. There
Speaker 3: was cheese and crackers, but that was always for the guests,
Speaker 3: you know, and she would eat very little.
Speaker 2: I always thought it was because she was an.
Speaker 3: Alcoholic and she wanted the wine to hit harder or
Speaker 3: the wine had calories, so she had to kind of
Speaker 3: pick her calories. But very inorexic. I you know, remember
Speaker 3: she would get.
Speaker 2: Compliments she was beautiful, and she would always say like
Speaker 2: someone would say, you look great.
Speaker 3: You go, oh, I have to lose that last five pounds. Oh,
Speaker 3: I gotta get rid of this. But she would always
Speaker 3: say that. And she was tiny, tiny, tiny, tiny, tiny,
Speaker 3: And you know it's interesting. She always said, you know,
Speaker 3: my thighs are touching. That was her My thighs are touching,
Speaker 3: like the thighs shouldn't touch like that's how you know
Speaker 3: then she wants her noise.
Speaker 2: Was that what was called?
Speaker 1: That was her noise? Like that was her noisy place
Speaker 1: like about her thighs or her thighs.
Speaker 3: She was always like when I walk behind her, she
Speaker 3: was always touching her butt, touching her. She would kind
Speaker 3: of squeeze her sell you know, kind of like looking back,
Speaker 3: I guess my psyche just couldn't process it at the time.
Speaker 2: It's just you know, too dark.
Speaker 3: And and then so for me, I think it was
Speaker 3: it was more contral I did model young, like you know,
Speaker 3: for money in high school and college, but I was
Speaker 3: before that, like it wasn't I can't blame Vogue or
Speaker 3: Kate Moss or any of that. I think, you know,
Speaker 3: when you grew up an alcoholic home, you have such a
Speaker 3: little control. There's so much chaos going on. And my
Speaker 3: dad did was very kind of a lothario. He did
Speaker 3: like skinny, tiny women. I think I just learned tiny
Speaker 3: you have to just be tiny, and I'm not a
Speaker 3: tiny person in the slightest. So by I went twelve
Speaker 3: or thirteen earlier than that, I was binging, though I
Speaker 3: would say it started with overeating, eating it two entire
Speaker 3: boxes of cereal, a whole thing of Weaver Chicken McNuggets,
Speaker 3: Like I was overweight and would binge first because you know,
Speaker 3: there weren't people around.
Speaker 2: I think that's how I got love. I think that's
Speaker 2: how I isolated.
Speaker 3: Like I would eat so much that it would kind
Speaker 3: of incapacitate me, so I would have an excuse for
Speaker 3: why I didn't have more friends. I'd be like, oh, well,
Speaker 3: even if they did ask me to hang out, I could.
Speaker 1: We have a lot of similarities. So what age of
Speaker 1: these memories mostly shining through thirteen and fourteen? I'm feeling
Speaker 1: it sounds like that, right.
Speaker 3: The binging on cereal, like the cocoa pebbles rudy.
Speaker 2: I mean I remember like I would.
Speaker 3: Have like cuts in my mouth because I couldn't wait
Speaker 3: for the milk to soften.
Speaker 2: The apple jacks, you know that was earlier, That was
Speaker 2: probably seven eighty nine.
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, I remember like eating Captain crunch, that peanut
Speaker 3: butter Captain crunch, just like like inhaling.
Speaker 1: It anxiety eating.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I think it was panicating anxiety eating. Also, we
Speaker 3: didn't sit around the table. My parents had gone through
Speaker 3: a divorce, Like there was no structure, Like I bless
Speaker 3: my mom's hard for.
Speaker 2: Working we had. Our moms were the first generation that
Speaker 2: were working. You know what.
Speaker 3: Same, I didn't have time to you know, cook for
Speaker 3: me whatever. But I do think I was very addicted
Speaker 3: to sugar. I was addicted to the shame of it.
Speaker 3: I was addicted to isolating with it.
Speaker 1: And then but that's not an age that you even
Speaker 1: know about eating disorders or that somebody's overweight or not.
Speaker 1: You're just living your own life. You don't you can't
Speaker 1: attach emotion to the food. You're just that's what you do.
Speaker 1: And I've seen this in other kids. That's why I'm
Speaker 1: saying that.
Speaker 3: And it's interesting because I would go back and forth
Speaker 3: for my not that getting a divorce is always unhealthy,
Speaker 3: you know, but going for my mom's house to my
Speaker 3: dad's house. My mom's refrigerator was artichokes and you know,
Speaker 3: bubbly water and diet coke, and then my dad's was
Speaker 3: just cereal and trash.
Speaker 2: You know. So by the time I went to his house,
Speaker 2: I was just like so.
Speaker 1: Hungry, you know, I kind of really binging and purging.
Speaker 2: That's exactly it.
Speaker 3: So then I go to my mom's house and I
Speaker 3: would starve and she'd be like, how did you know?
Speaker 3: And so then by the time I was a teenager,
Speaker 3: full blown rice cakes apples would go for three hour
Speaker 3: runs like that.
Speaker 1: What's a teenager?
Speaker 2: What age?
Speaker 1: You're saying fourteen or sixteen?
Speaker 3: By fourteen, but I would say by fourteen I was
Speaker 3: I guess that would just be anorexic. I guess you
Speaker 3: would just say anorexic like severely restricting.
Speaker 2: But I would eat a lot of low calorie.
Speaker 3: Foods, like a huge amount. It was like apples, rice cakes,
Speaker 3: fat free yogurt. I'd eat like the whole thing of
Speaker 3: rice cakes, a whole like five or six out, and
Speaker 3: then I would go for you know, like a two
Speaker 3: or three hour run my.
Speaker 1: House growing up, I think I was my daughter's age,
Speaker 1: like thirteen, and I remember my mother had a cart
Speaker 1: of laxatives. I remember it like it was yesterday, like
Speaker 1: a plastic white with the doors, and it was I
Speaker 1: didn't understand what it was. It was like I thought
Speaker 1: she just couldn't go. And then we'd be in the
Speaker 1: car and she drink a lot of coffee and they'd
Speaker 1: have to stop and like so this was and there
Speaker 1: was like the bacon cheeseburgers dripping and raw and drenched
Speaker 1: salads because she was binging and purging and it was
Speaker 1: and there was a very like an anxiety in the house,
Speaker 1: like because she'd have to like take a long time
Speaker 1: in the bathroom after meals. And so this was all
Speaker 1: this like secrecy and hidden stuff going on in my household.
Speaker 1: So that was like Noisy and her method because you
Speaker 1: didn't talk about how your mom treated you about your body.
Speaker 1: Because my mother would say that, like tempora at the
Speaker 1: Japanese restaurant isn't fattening because of the way that they
Speaker 1: fry the oil the Japanese, So like she would kind
Speaker 1: of what I would be eating a lot, and then
Speaker 1: I was struggling with my weight, and I would read
Speaker 1: all those magazines that had like half a cantalope. You know,
Speaker 1: there was one called the Flight Attendants Diet every week,
Speaker 1: and those magazines would be a new page. You'd want
Speaker 1: to rip it out, try it for two days, but
Speaker 1: it was sort of secret, and you were going to
Speaker 1: school and listening to what other people are saying. So
Speaker 1: for people of teens, it happens quickly. Like my daughter's thirteen,
Speaker 1: and I've never mentioned a thing in all these years
Speaker 1: about weight or you know, I don't like anyone around
Speaker 1: talking about, oh I have to lose weight, or I
Speaker 1: don't look good in these ps like there's zero. But
Speaker 1: you can't control what goes on at school. So that's
Speaker 1: why I'm relating to you on a different side of
Speaker 1: the coin. But like the same time of your life,
Speaker 1: of a girl's life.
Speaker 3: I remember because there would be I it's just funny,
Speaker 3: and I don't mean to laugh because at the time,
Speaker 3: you know, these people were struggling. But like a diet
Speaker 3: was like cottage cheese and truscits, you know, like that
Speaker 3: was like supposedly low fat, and you like think about
Speaker 3: it now and you're like, well, that's like a cheap day,
Speaker 3: like got in there or whatever. But I remember that's
Speaker 3: what I would bring to school because that when my
Speaker 3: mom made me lunch, that's like all she I saw.
Speaker 3: I was like the weirdo at school who had like
Speaker 3: triscuts and cottage cheese.
Speaker 2: Like I had the lunch bag that.
Speaker 3: Was just like wet and just like like it was
Speaker 3: a My mom worked at Bloomingdale, so it was a
Speaker 3: little brown bag.
Speaker 2: Like I always had, like a blooming sales bag. You know.
Speaker 3: It was just so weird And another thing that you
Speaker 3: made me think of. I remember one time finding dex
Speaker 3: a trim.
Speaker 2: Do you remember that. I don't.
Speaker 3: It was, of course, quote weight loss pill. It was
Speaker 3: I think probably just a lot of caffeine. And I
Speaker 3: remember I used to sneak that and try to take that.
Speaker 3: But I would find like weird sketchy diet pills.
Speaker 2: That probably that's.
Speaker 1: One thing that's better about now. It's different. People are
Speaker 1: obsessed with intimontent fasting and juicing and cleansing, and it
Speaker 1: was empic back then. You're right, Like there was was
Speaker 1: a diet that said like one hot dog, one half
Speaker 1: a cup of coffee, and then you could have one
Speaker 1: scoop of an ll ice cream. Like it was all
Speaker 1: random and it was very Scarsdale diet, Akins diet. Like
Speaker 1: every week there was a new thing that you'd grip onto.
Speaker 1: The slim fast bars came out.
Speaker 2: There was one that was like steak and wine exactly.
Speaker 3: The kind of thing which I think I'm kind of
Speaker 3: into that one.
Speaker 2: Remember.
Speaker 3: But like also we were all a little off, you know,
Speaker 3: like remember the food pyramid when we were like sent
Speaker 3: it was like the whole bottom was like loaves of bread,
Speaker 3: like French bread, potatoes, like a big pile of beans.
Speaker 2: Like it was just like the psycho.
Speaker 1: And measuring measuring. They wanted to get to measure your food.
Speaker 1: It was so noisy to begin with. You're starting off,
Speaker 1: you know, the food pyramid was totally insustainable.
Speaker 3: Yeah, well it was just I mean, you know, and
Speaker 3: I think everyone's bodies are different, you know whatever. But
Speaker 3: but so then by the time I get to high school,
Speaker 3: I'm full blown. It's just about being as skinny as possible.
Speaker 3: It's just about being as skinny as possible. And something
Speaker 3: I will say that is, you know, you know when
Speaker 3: people struggle with uh, severe in orexia or severe over
Speaker 3: eating stuff and being really really heavy. I've learned a
Speaker 3: lot about how there's some childhood sexual abuse sometimes involved
Speaker 3: in that, so you know, it's about sort of making
Speaker 3: yourself either unappealing or not feminine or not sexually attractive,
Speaker 3: or protecting yourself.
Speaker 2: By being heavy and stuff.
Speaker 3: So I feel like I always need to kind of
Speaker 3: say that the same I was reading something about people
Speaker 3: to get a lot of plastic surgery sometimes and get
Speaker 3: super dysomorphic that they're trying to change the face of
Speaker 3: the change the person that was molested or something. So's, yeah,
Speaker 3: there's a lot of like other stuff in here. And
Speaker 3: we absolutely had some you know, inappropriate stuff going on
Speaker 3: in you know for me as a child too, So
Speaker 3: I don't know what was what.
Speaker 1: You're talking about. Sexual stuff, yeah, sexual same like me too.
Speaker 1: You remember things and your mind plays tricks on you,
Speaker 1: but you, like the father's friend might and you think,
Speaker 1: like you remember the moment too clearly about a couple
Speaker 1: of people, but like you just dealt with it, and
Speaker 1: you almost feel like fraudulent if you came out and
Speaker 1: talked about it specifically, because if feels hazy. But you
Speaker 1: know it's true, that kind of thing.
Speaker 3: Yes, And I know a couple situations that were absolutely true.
Speaker 3: I think I was confused for a while because one
Speaker 3: of them was a woman.
Speaker 2: Oh and you know, well back in the day, we.
Speaker 3: Didn't babysitters, didn't get them off apps where they were vetted.
Speaker 3: It was just like like, does anyone on the street
Speaker 3: have a thirteen year old son? Like that was your
Speaker 3: babysitter back then.
Speaker 1: Totally, totally, totally, totally I was physically abused by a
Speaker 1: babysitter too, That's totally true. Anyone could smack anyone could
Speaker 1: could smack you. Anyone could be you know, what's it
Speaker 1: called spank you.
Speaker 2: Oh. I would go to friend's houses.
Speaker 3: I would get I mean literally against a wall with
Speaker 3: a ruler by someone else's.
Speaker 1: Dad exactly, which doesn't happen at your own house exactly.
Speaker 3: You can't you can't even find that on porn hub,
Speaker 3: but they even take that down, you know.
Speaker 2: So it was you know, so there is some of that.
Speaker 2: I have no reason.
Speaker 3: To have needed to be that skinny, you know, so
Speaker 3: there was obviously something else going on. I'm sure, you know,
Speaker 3: it made people kind of I've talked to people, and
Speaker 3: that I went to high school with.
Speaker 2: It made people kind of like scared to talk to me.
Speaker 3: And maybe I liked that in a way because I
Speaker 3: was really awkward socially and I was very a loner
Speaker 3: kind of and maybe I like I never went to
Speaker 3: lunch and sat with the popular girls.
Speaker 2: I went eight raisins in my car, you know, shit
Speaker 2: like that, insular, isolated, and then by the time I
Speaker 2: got to college, it just was weird.
Speaker 3: Like it was like I would take these Swiss miss
Speaker 3: powdered hot chocolate. I would buy like five or six
Speaker 3: boxes at the grocery store, poured them in a bowl,
Speaker 3: put water, and then the ones that only had twenty
Speaker 3: calories and mix them up, put.
Speaker 2: It in the microwave and turn like turn them into
Speaker 2: like a cake.
Speaker 1: Wow. You know what it sounds though, like you were
Speaker 1: obsessive because I relate to that too, so you needed
Speaker 1: like a new project, like, oh, this is the diet.
Speaker 1: I'm only eating one rice, two apples, like a weird formula.
Speaker 1: It becomes your own. I don't know if you're like
Speaker 1: that now. I still am, but in organizing and like
Speaker 1: getting rid of things and nothing extra, it's obsessive and
Speaker 1: it's a problem.
Speaker 2: You're safe food. So it's like if someone was like, hey,
Speaker 2: do you want you know, acado.
Speaker 3: At this avocado toast that probably has less calories and
Speaker 3: less fat. It's just it's not I know how this ends.
Speaker 3: I know how this works.
Speaker 2: I have you know. By the time I, you know, got.
Speaker 3: To La, it was it was turkey jerky and maple syrup,
Speaker 3: just weird.
Speaker 1: And then I went through loud those were allowed, like popcorn,
Speaker 1: you were allowed, but others are forbidden foods.
Speaker 3: Yes, then it was it was carrots and ketchup carrots
Speaker 3: and barbecue sauce. Like it just was condiments, you know,
Speaker 3: like weird condiments shit like that, but stuff that ultimately
Speaker 3: I think made me need to hide because it was embarrassing. Yes,
Speaker 3: it was never something socially accepted and something that made
Speaker 3: me feel some shame afterwards, you know.
Speaker 2: So it was just bizarre.
Speaker 3: I definitely went through those seaweed things. I'll see even
Speaker 3: those seaweed things, but the wasabi seaweed sheets, yes.
Speaker 1: But that's new, Like how how has your how has
Speaker 1: this manifested? As a woman in Hollywood? And then as
Speaker 1: a pregnant woman.
Speaker 3: I got to the point, there's a couple of things.
Speaker 3: I went to a program called ACA Adult Children of
Speaker 3: Alcoholics that is about growing up an alcoholic home and
Speaker 3: all the sort of maladaptive behaviors that you get very
Speaker 3: honestly in order to survive as a child. They serve
Speaker 3: you very well, you know, the people pleasing, the mothering, martyring, micromanaging,
Speaker 3: self depriving, control, addiction, perfectionism, addiction, the overachieving thing. And
Speaker 3: then went to that program was a total miracle, really
Speaker 3: helped me. You know, you do these like inner child
Speaker 3: exercises of like you treat yourself? Would you treat yourself
Speaker 3: the way you would treat a five year old child?
Speaker 2: That kind of sounds dorky.
Speaker 3: You write her letters, you know, you write the question
Speaker 3: about what do you want to eat today? And your
Speaker 3: right hand you respond as her in your non dominant hand,
Speaker 3: and she'll.
Speaker 2: Say like peanut butter and jelly, and you go, well,
Speaker 2: that's all reading for lunch. And I also got sick
Speaker 2: of wasting so much time.
Speaker 3: I did read this book called The Tools I Phil
Speaker 3: Stutts and Barry Michaels. Phil Stutts is like the biggest
Speaker 3: like therapist you know out here, And there's this exercise
Speaker 3: called the deathbed exercise. It just resonated with me. It'd
Speaker 3: be like, you imagine yourself on your deathbed and you
Speaker 3: picture all the things you're going to be, like annoyed
Speaker 3: you wasted time on. And I remember being I remember
Speaker 3: being with Busy Phillips.
Speaker 2: I'm sure you know Busy. We were like working on
Speaker 2: something and she was like, if I'm on my deathbed,
Speaker 2: going like I can't believe how much time I wasted
Speaker 2: thinking about calories and food, And I went, that is
Speaker 2: going to be me, like just the how many was that?
Speaker 2: And what am I gonna eat next? And what did
Speaker 2: I eat today?
Speaker 3: Now I have to go on a walk, and like
Speaker 3: I didn't have a personal it's a full time job,
Speaker 3: and I'd be like, I feel like I'd be the
Speaker 3: most successful person in Hollywood if I just took the
Speaker 3: energy I spend on like driving around the city getting
Speaker 3: that one.
Speaker 2: Protein bar that's the safe protein bar this month.
Speaker 1: Oh wow, and just to meet with organizing, to be
Speaker 1: honest with you, like that's going to be with organizing.
Speaker 3: Have you ever hired someone to come in and do
Speaker 3: it for you or you won't?
Speaker 1: I could do it for them.
Speaker 2: I there is.
Speaker 3: Though, do you ever play like like Tetris or any
Speaker 3: of those games?
Speaker 2: I started going back to playing old games.
Speaker 3: It's like the Symmetry of the Tea and Tetris, Like
Speaker 3: don't you know that video game?
Speaker 2: Remember those things are falling.
Speaker 3: It's very soothing to organize and put things in their
Speaker 3: place and know where they are.
Speaker 2: But that's back man.
Speaker 1: I was always obsessed with misspac Man and it's very satisfying.
Speaker 1: And it's very much like that. And the thing is, I,
Speaker 1: because of the crazy amount that I have going on
Speaker 1: in my life, the being organized is also critical. So
Speaker 1: it's like you have to be in a relationship with it,
Speaker 1: that's right. So I have to be in a relationship
Speaker 1: with being organized because I couldn't do all that I
Speaker 1: do without it. So it's not like it's not like
Speaker 1: pulling me down. It's actually great, But it's something I
Speaker 1: can't and I can't even when I talk to my
Speaker 1: therapist about it. It cannot It can be improved, but
Speaker 1: it cannot be intervened. It can't be. It's never gonna
Speaker 1: I will go on to my deathbeds still being organized.
Speaker 1: Like I'll have my coffin. We'll have labels inside of it.
Speaker 2: Can I is that bad?
Speaker 3: I mean, you don't know, right, it's like working, yeah, people,
Speaker 3: people who get mixed up, their coffins get mixed up
Speaker 3: all the time.
Speaker 2: That's a real thing.
Speaker 3: You're looking at my podcast studio, which is like the
Speaker 3: pee Wee's playhouse, like chaos. And I'm the same with organizing,
Speaker 3: Like I I don't know. I don't think we should
Speaker 3: have to overpathologize everything about ourselves.
Speaker 2: Like because number one, it's also just like a hobby.
Speaker 2: People like, oh my god, you're going to recopy the
Speaker 2: labels again. I'm like, there's this look.
Speaker 1: It's fiddling. I call it fiddling, and it's true. People
Speaker 1: guard and they want to fuck around their garden. It's fiddling.
Speaker 1: And I like it too. So that's a great point.
Speaker 2: I found a new system. There's a new system.
Speaker 3: It's like, you know, it's like the fact that we're
Speaker 3: still on metric or whatever and everywhere, like we should
Speaker 3: update new systems if they're not. Like because I went
Speaker 3: through it organizing, I went through the wicker baskets with
Speaker 3: the and then I'm like, I can't see my shit.
Speaker 3: So then I ran through the plexiglass bag. I'm like,
Speaker 3: this is better. But I'm like, wait, now there's a
Speaker 3: version with drawers like I. Now I'm getting those like I.
Speaker 1: It's fun, it's like gambling. It's for entertainment too.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and it's also like home decore too, you know.
Speaker 3: It's also there is a I think it's really important,
Speaker 3: especially because I think people like us we always want
Speaker 3: to grow and we want to change. And I'll look
Speaker 3: at things that I'm like, that's okay. The I do
Speaker 3: have a wrapping paper closet.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, I do too, I have I have
Speaker 1: a room. I have like a candy speck amazing.
Speaker 3: But like I was pathologically thoughtful. That's an ACA thing
Speaker 3: for a while, And I gave too many gifts for
Speaker 3: a long time because I didn't think I was enough.
Speaker 2: And I had the.
Speaker 3: Whole like shelf of dipty candles just in case someone
Speaker 3: came over.
Speaker 1: When I tell you I have a gift life. I
Speaker 1: have to. I started on Halloween. You have to say,
Speaker 1: this is crazy, like I have a gift obsession.
Speaker 2: Me too, and I think I love it.
Speaker 1: Though I love it, it makes me. I live for it.
Speaker 2: It's how we show love.
Speaker 3: And to me, I feel like because everyone always thinks
Speaker 3: I'm being sarcastic, it's hard for me to be genuine
Speaker 3: with people when I'm like, I love you, You're such
Speaker 3: a good friend, or I have to make a joke
Speaker 3: or people assume it. So I really like giving gifts
Speaker 3: because it's like there, it's and also like you know,
Speaker 3: it's a nightmare out there, and like a sixty eighty
Speaker 3: dollars candle. No one should ever buy that for themselves,
Speaker 3: you know what I mean.
Speaker 1: And it's systematic too though, but it also is satisfying,
Speaker 1: like it costs money, you spent, you send it out,
Speaker 1: you wrap it, you send it emphedes, it looks good,
Speaker 1: they get it. I live for it. I do it
Speaker 1: all year round.
Speaker 2: It it makes me feel. My goal in life was
Speaker 2: always to be Santa Claus. I saw Santa Claus at
Speaker 2: the mall, and when I want to be that guy.
Speaker 3: So but then I go, Okay, it can't be an
Speaker 3: entire thing.
Speaker 2: I don't I'm not as successful as you.
Speaker 3: So I'm like, okay, I need to take this down
Speaker 3: a little bit because this is a little bit of
Speaker 3: a vestige when I had way too low self esteem
Speaker 3: and I thought I had to send a thank you
Speaker 3: card after I got a thank you card, so let
Speaker 3: me take So I think that updating our organization is
Speaker 3: also a way of showing our growth, you know. And
Speaker 3: so like I had this whole thing of the press
Speaker 3: on nails section, I'm like, I don't really do that anymore.
Speaker 2: I used to be super obsessive.
Speaker 3: About my nails and then I can't get anything done
Speaker 3: and then one breaks and that's all I'm thinking about.
Speaker 3: I was like, that became a weird sick addiction and
Speaker 3: obsession and perfectionism, you know.
Speaker 1: Because that's my circular reference. You have to go get
Speaker 1: the manicure again and get it filled in, and then
Speaker 1: you have to it's.
Speaker 2: Let me, so let me.
Speaker 3: I need to reorganize this because this is actually a
Speaker 3: negative contribution to my future self. So when I upgrade
Speaker 3: something mentally to get healthier, I'm gonna have So it's
Speaker 3: not unhealthy to go, I need to organize this again.
Speaker 3: You know, it's not pathological, it's just that I we're
Speaker 3: not here, We're not in this place anymore.
Speaker 1: Well, everything doesn't have to be healthy. You could eat
Speaker 1: Cheetos and you don't have to go to jail. I'm
Speaker 1: saying it's like not healthy, but like you're some TV
Speaker 1: shows aren't healthy, but you're doing it. It's like it's
Speaker 1: not a guilty pleasure, but it's something that you're doing
Speaker 1: it over. Being overly healthy is also unhealthy.
Speaker 2: Do you know about Barbara's Cheese puffs.
Speaker 1: Barbara's Barbara the health brand.
Speaker 3: Yeah, they have cheese yes that are that are like Cheetos.
Speaker 2: They're delicious.
Speaker 1: I think all that. I think all that Calieflower too.
Speaker 1: It's that that hippies respectfully to it's got it's a scam.
Speaker 1: It's a scam.
Speaker 2: I think.
Speaker 1: Just eat the real thing.
Speaker 2: H Barber's cheese puffs. What is it made of?
Speaker 3: Because I just ordered a bunch of them. I don't
Speaker 3: know that if it's cauliflower though.
Speaker 1: No I know, But I'm just saying, like if you
Speaker 1: look at a free tho, there are three ingredients corn oil, salt,
Speaker 1: so like that's it.
Speaker 3: This is cornmeal, age, cheddar, pasteurized milk. Yeah, I agree
Speaker 3: with you. Like the the cauliflower rice and the collie
Speaker 3: all that shit. I'm like, I'm just gonna be hungry
Speaker 3: in five minutes.
Speaker 1: And it's also mixing together a bunch of other shit,
Speaker 1: which is a different process. So that's what I think
Speaker 1: about that.
Speaker 2: That's a good point. That's a good point.
Speaker 1: So the alcohol in your house, because I grew up
Speaker 1: also with a mother who was an alcoholic, and there
Speaker 1: are different styles. I remember each drink, like the special
Speaker 1: drink phases, what the drink order would be. But there
Speaker 1: are different styles. Some people they call it French type
Speaker 1: or they're just always having a drink and then into
Speaker 1: the late night drinking. But it's not like a fifth
Speaker 1: of vodka in the toilet holder behind you and the
Speaker 1: person's like blackout. It's just like always sort of marinated.
Speaker 1: That was my house with combined with the cigarettes and
Speaker 1: the bolima. What was your style in your house of
Speaker 1: your mom like embarrassing or like what was it?
Speaker 2: I love?
Speaker 3: I love this question, and first I'll say it helped
Speaker 3: me to hear in order for alcoholism to be present,
Speaker 3: alcohol doesn't have to be present and that's not just
Speaker 3: because alcohol is being hidden or whatever, but there's other
Speaker 3: forms of isms, you know, compulsive behaviors and.
Speaker 2: Stuff like that.
Speaker 3: So if someone's listening and they're like, yeah, my life
Speaker 3: was chaotic as a kid, and I sort of understand
Speaker 3: all this, but I never saw alcohol like I was
Speaker 3: kind of the same way. You know, my mom was
Speaker 3: a socialite. She was you know, worked at apartment stores,
Speaker 3: and she always had like a glass of white wine.
Speaker 3: It was like it was the white wine spritzer. It
Speaker 3: was always like a spritzer, like it.
Speaker 2: Died in a while.
Speaker 1: Being an alcoholic is hard.
Speaker 2: Well.
Speaker 3: The ordering was always too apologetic, like I look back now,
Speaker 3: and it was like looking at the menu like I
Speaker 3: would do this when I had eating disorders and I
Speaker 3: was out with people, and I would go like, ah,
Speaker 3: should I get? I would pretend I was being rushed,
Speaker 3: you know, or couldn't make a decision. I'd be like, oh,
Speaker 3: should I get the burger?
Speaker 2: Should I get the spaghetti? Or you know what, I'll
Speaker 2: just have the caesar salad.
Speaker 1: No dressing, that's fine, a throwaway comment.
Speaker 3: There was like a performance to it to try to
Speaker 3: convince people that I would have ordered the spaghetti or
Speaker 3: the hamburger, but like I'll.
Speaker 2: Just do Caesar salad dressing on the side.
Speaker 1: I'll just have some of your triggering. Wow.
Speaker 2: That is sar wow.
Speaker 1: No, it's very honest, and most people with eating disorders
Speaker 1: don't want to give it up because then they can't
Speaker 1: go back to it because everybody knows, like once you
Speaker 1: say it, you're saying it.
Speaker 2: Now.
Speaker 1: If you ever have a little of that behavior, it's
Speaker 1: so exposed.
Speaker 3: But also like I mean, maybe it's just because I've
Speaker 3: gone through it, Like when I see someone doing it,
Speaker 3: I now I'm embarrassed because I'm like, I can't believe
Speaker 3: I thought I was pulling that off. Like I can't
Speaker 3: believe I thought that people were so dumb.
Speaker 2: I mean, if there's a lot of people, you.
Speaker 3: Can kind of get away with it, Like you know
Speaker 3: I would because my mom, I always watched her if
Speaker 3: she got vegetables like sauteed vegetables, if she couldn't get
Speaker 3: them steamed, she would pat it with a napkin to
Speaker 3: get all the oil off, which we now know like
Speaker 3: and then as an adult, I would kind of like
Speaker 3: accidentally drop well, when I was twenty four twenty five,
Speaker 3: I would accidentally drop my napkin on like a greasy's
Speaker 3: vegetables and be like, oh yeah, like shit like that,
Speaker 3: like shit like that, so that I didn't look, you know,
Speaker 3: like I wouldn't eat fat, you know.
Speaker 2: But I'm also I'm in LA.
Speaker 3: Everyone does shit like that, but I'm still doing this
Speaker 3: rigormarole performance to try and eat in front of people.
Speaker 3: I would sit in my car and pretend I was
Speaker 3: running late or whatever.
Speaker 2: I mean, I'd probably already eat in like twelve protein bars,
Speaker 2: you know kind of thing. They're like, I'm sorry, I'm late.
Speaker 2: It's fine. I'll just get like a side of something,
Speaker 2: you know, in and out.
Speaker 1: Wow. And what about now? Though, how's your relationship to this?
Speaker 1: Pregnant is another layer.
Speaker 3: Pregnant's been like, it's amazingly healing because your body's like,
Speaker 3: this is where you're eating today, And I'm not just
Speaker 3: eating for an inner child that's metaphor, it's an actual
Speaker 3: inner child. So again, the twelve step program of ACA
Speaker 3: really helped me with my eating stuff. I started eating
Speaker 3: to live and living to eat all that inner child work,
Speaker 3: you know. I just the dysmorphia really lifted around then,
Speaker 3: especially when I started working a lot and going like, oh,
Speaker 3: I started loving something more than hating myself, which was
Speaker 3: stand up and performing and touring. And I just I realized,
Speaker 3: I have all these big goals.
Speaker 2: I can't possibly accomplish them if I'm always distracted by food.
Speaker 2: I'm hungry. I'm in a catatonic shit ugur coma. I
Speaker 2: met go to the gym three times a day, going
Speaker 2: for walks four times a day, counting calor. I just
Speaker 2: was like, I something shifted.
Speaker 1: How old were you? Because something usually shifts. You remember
Speaker 1: a one weird thing that happened.
Speaker 2: Around twenty six.
Speaker 3: I went into ACA and that's where I started really helping,
Speaker 3: and I got a stand up special and I was like,
Speaker 3: I am not going to screw this up because I'm
Speaker 3: thinking about food. I am not going to I am
Speaker 3: not going to screw this up because I've drank five
Speaker 3: diet sun kiss today and not had any protein.
Speaker 2: This is it? Like this is it? You know?
Speaker 3: And also like I was like, all of a sudden,
Speaker 3: you're in hair and makeup and stuff like that, and
Speaker 3: I was like going bald.
Speaker 2: I was like my hair was falling out.
Speaker 1: No, yeah, I had disordered relationship to food. I never
Speaker 1: threw threw up. I can't stand throwing up. I never
Speaker 1: I used to binge when I would go out and
Speaker 1: I would drink a lot, and I'd come home and
Speaker 1: binge and then I'd go on some sort of juice
Speaker 1: cleanser fast for the next couple of days. But in
Speaker 1: my late thirties, I remember I was going to Italy,
Speaker 1: and every time I had ever gone away to a
Speaker 1: trip like that, I'd always like gotten the anpti pasta
Speaker 1: or all the vegetables. Those were legal, even if they
Speaker 1: were in ten pounds of oil. Like for me, those
Speaker 1: were legal. Like you talk about your stuff, and I
Speaker 1: would never touch the pasta or the payea, and then
Speaker 1: I would binge on it and get swollen and like
Speaker 1: it was just like a bad ride. And I vowed
Speaker 1: that I was going to Italy and I was going
Speaker 1: to have everything. And that was when it became like
Speaker 1: small full fat cappuccino, not torturing someone because they don't
Speaker 1: have skim milk, or like small gelato, and like that's
Speaker 1: how the book Naturally Thin came to be, because it
Speaker 1: became like your quote unquote diet, which is the worst word,
Speaker 1: is a bank account, like you just if you have
Speaker 1: a little of this, don't have that. If you're having wine,
Speaker 1: don't have bread. If you're having bread, don't have dessert.
Speaker 1: And it became like have a small pasta and it
Speaker 1: became so balanced and it changed my life. It just
Speaker 1: sort of evolved, and it wasn't noisy, so it wasn't
Speaker 1: ever a disorder. Really it would be moments of binging
Speaker 1: and moments of discomfort, but it did run my life
Speaker 1: like you were saying, it was noisy. But then one day,
Speaker 1: just like listed because of being just a normal human being, and.
Speaker 2: You're making me realize, like how I did this movie
Speaker 2: where that was in England, the one that I was
Speaker 2: on with Busy Phillips. It was called nat of Honor.
Speaker 3: And I didn't have all my control foods. I couldn't
Speaker 3: go to Pink Dot on Sunset and get my Alberto
Speaker 3: Turkey jerky.
Speaker 2: I couldn't, you know.
Speaker 3: And it was this Aquen movies had these big budgets.
Speaker 3: It was this big romantic comedy. Patrick Dumpsy was huge
Speaker 3: at the time.
Speaker 2: And I really wanted to be friends with Busy Phillips
Speaker 2: and she wanted to go to Whole.
Speaker 3: Foods and get a thing, and I wanted to get
Speaker 3: exactly what she was getting so that she, you know,
Speaker 3: would think I was cool or whatever. And I just
Speaker 3: to fit in on that set and to not look crazy.
Speaker 3: And also because I wasn't able to get the swissness
Speaker 3: cocoa bullshit nonsense that I was getting here. I was
Speaker 3: eating you know it with some bread with hummus, and
Speaker 3: then I was I was eating I don't want to
Speaker 3: say normal, but I was eating.
Speaker 2: I would go to Whole.
Speaker 3: Foods and we'd get the kale and eggs and egg salad.
Speaker 1: Were a normal person.
Speaker 2: I actually started losing weight. I was like, wait a second.
Speaker 3: All these things that I because I would drink like
Speaker 3: three ice blendid the day, I'd have like, you know,
Speaker 3: these smoothies.
Speaker 2: I'd have like Hershey chocolate shirt.
Speaker 3: Like I was eating high sugar and like I wasn't
Speaker 3: even good at being antrexit because it was like very hot.
Speaker 3: I was eating these protein bars. It was like tiger
Speaker 3: milk bars, like those are basically Snickers.
Speaker 2: Now, you know.
Speaker 1: I did the same thing at the Big Chill and West.
Speaker 1: I used to go get the large chill also and
Speaker 1: a container of brown rice from the Chinese place, and
Speaker 1: I'd eat the whole big container and a giant yogurt
Speaker 1: like versus just having a small something normal now like
Speaker 1: ice cream, It's.
Speaker 3: Okay, exactly, just have like a chicken sandwich and it's
Speaker 3: gonna actually be less, less.
Speaker 2: Calories and less sugar. So so because remember back in
Speaker 2: the day, remember like snack.
Speaker 3: Wells, like all all that shit. You know, it was
Speaker 3: like low fat, high fat, low sugar is actually you know,
Speaker 3: way better. So I stopped eating so much trash process free.
Speaker 3: You know, I was anista. Yep, I was interacting, probably
Speaker 3: eating four thousand calories a day.
Speaker 1: I think it wassistent, it was, I really really get it. Wow. Okay,
Speaker 1: So more importantly is you put on lotion in the
Speaker 1: middle of the night when you go to pee. Have
Speaker 1: you you what's the wiping and the lotion? You're putting
Speaker 1: your hands on your face. You just sat down to pee.
Speaker 1: You haven't yet wiped.
Speaker 2: Oh you know what's weird? I don't.
Speaker 3: Oh gosh, I never even thought about so no I do.
Speaker 3: In the middle of the night, I reapplied grape seed
Speaker 3: oil to my face because I mean you probably sleep
Speaker 3: with a silk pillowcase.
Speaker 1: No, no, I don't.
Speaker 2: Oh really, the.
Speaker 3: Silk pillowcase really helps because what happens is, I mean
Speaker 3: I've just found you know that you get all these
Speaker 3: amazing products, and you know, I do the Derma rolling,
Speaker 3: which is like the roller that puts like the tiny
Speaker 3: micro needling.
Speaker 2: In your face, and then I'll put the product.
Speaker 3: Then I'll put the product on, and then I you
Speaker 3: lay down and then you put your face on your
Speaker 3: cotton pillow and it just absorbs all of your product
Speaker 3: and all the leaches, all the oils in your face
Speaker 3: and then for eight hours you're just lying there. So
Speaker 3: I grew up half like on a farm, and I
Speaker 3: just treat my skin the way that we used to
Speaker 3: treat saddles, which is you never leave them wet ever
Speaker 3: ever ever, you never let them out in the sun,
Speaker 3: and you oil them every day like the.
Speaker 2: Way because our faith is basically leather, you know, So
Speaker 2: to me.
Speaker 1: I never your face feeder.
Speaker 2: I mean, you gotta.
Speaker 3: It's like, this is what OCD OCD really works for you.
Speaker 3: So when I get up in the middle of the night,
Speaker 3: you know, I've got my grape seed oil and I
Speaker 3: sit on the toilet, put on the grape seed oil
Speaker 3: and then white.
Speaker 2: So I guess it is technically somewhat hygienic.
Speaker 3: I have my grape seed oil pump right by my
Speaker 3: toilet in my.
Speaker 1: Bedroom, So for me, there are many roads to roam.
Speaker 1: And the micro needling thing. I never really trust that
Speaker 1: I can do it right and I don't want to
Speaker 1: overdo it. And people say you can break capillaries. For me,
Speaker 1: that's just like a good exfoliation. So then the products absorb.
Speaker 2: Yeah, if you can do that, so I do. It's
Speaker 2: just the roller.
Speaker 1: But is that is that a fancy one? Oh it's not,
Speaker 1: you said micro needle.
Speaker 2: No, I'm sorry, derma roll. It's little tread.
Speaker 3: It's got these tiny micro needles in them. But it's
Speaker 3: not like going to a facialist and doing I don't
Speaker 3: get facials.
Speaker 2: I don't go to petrol They I get bored and
Speaker 2: they I always break out after.
Speaker 1: Okay, I don't understand what a creepy vintage holy water
Speaker 1: bottle is that you that you collect?
Speaker 2: I just love.
Speaker 1: I don't want to make you walk again. But this
Speaker 1: is the baby is gonna come. If you give birth
Speaker 1: on the baby, do you know how big the downloads
Speaker 1: will be?
Speaker 3: I mean, let's start crowning. I like vintage apocket theory, bottles.
Speaker 3: This is, says mammary Substance. I guess I just want
Speaker 3: or in it. I just I just I like them.
Speaker 3: I don't know.
Speaker 2: Maybe I come from descend from witches. I mean, do
Speaker 2: you what do you collect?
Speaker 1: Do you have any I collect watches, I collect, okay,
Speaker 1: back certain bags, and I'm trying to think of what else.
Speaker 3: I'm not there yet. Is there anything just odd that
Speaker 3: you collect? Anything like, It's gonna come to me chocho.
Speaker 1: I do like I don't collect them, but I like
Speaker 1: snow globes. I have a decent I like certain snow globes.
Speaker 1: We have to be very very nice ones. But I'm
Speaker 1: gonna have to think. I do like things I don't like.
Speaker 3: You have like the New York on Madison Avenue snow
Speaker 3: globe kind of thing.
Speaker 2: I like.
Speaker 1: I just think it's something that you can take a
Speaker 1: memory with you and if you don't buy the really
Speaker 1: cheapo ones. But sometimes the cheapo ones are fun too.
Speaker 1: It is a good memory. And I put them in
Speaker 1: different places throughout the house so it doesn't feel like
Speaker 1: I'm hoarding them, but so I make them sort of decorative. Also,
Speaker 1: I do like snow globes. I always have it, and
Speaker 1: it's more in now like it came back. But I
Speaker 1: have always liked it.
Speaker 3: I like chotchkes, and I don't have them in my
Speaker 3: house is very austere for the most part, but in here.
Speaker 3: So I did find these holy water bottles on Etsy,
Speaker 3: like I love like flea markets, and so I did
Speaker 3: collect these like holy water bottles that were really beautiful.
Speaker 3: And I think it got online yet because I gave
Speaker 3: it to Kesha.
Speaker 1: She and oh wow, okay, well that's good.
Speaker 2: She needed it.
Speaker 1: And you carry a hammer in the car in case
Speaker 1: you ever see a dog or baby hopefully trapped in
Speaker 1: a car. You mentioned a dog, but let's add baby.
Speaker 2: Let's add baby.
Speaker 1: Have you ever used it? Says it ever happened?
Speaker 2: I have?
Speaker 3: I have, and it was very, very embarrassing. Well one time, okay,
Speaker 3: so I've had to do in grocery stores a couple
Speaker 3: of times.
Speaker 1: You can't do it in grocery stores. You need to
Speaker 1: sorry in.
Speaker 3: The in the parking lot of a grocery store.
Speaker 2: Usually you can.
Speaker 3: Go in and do, hey, can you make an announcement
Speaker 3: and say, whoever has the blue Toyota Corolla.
Speaker 2: You need to come out here and get your dog.
Speaker 3: Like usually in LA you can you know do that first,
Speaker 3: but a law has been passed now that it is illegal,
Speaker 3: so now I can just you know do it. One
Speaker 3: time I did it outside of these twelve step meetings,
Speaker 3: and I smashed this window to get the dog out,
Speaker 3: and it's like a it's like a hammer, but it
Speaker 3: also has like a glass cutter on the side as well.
Speaker 3: It's worth it the woman have in their car anyway,
Speaker 3: And I stormed into one of the meetings and was.
Speaker 2: Like, whose car is this? Whose dog is this that.
Speaker 3: I'm like screaming, And it was the meeting for people
Speaker 3: I swear to God covering from parents with anger mansion,
Speaker 3: and it was like it was like an AA meeting
Speaker 3: is like where.
Speaker 2: The person actually was. I just saw these people just
Speaker 2: like horrified, and I'm.
Speaker 1: Like, oh, working on this right now. I'm glad you asked,
Speaker 1: because we're working on this passion. This is a planned simulation.
Speaker 1: Do you want to see how you reacted as crazy actions?
Speaker 2: It like couldn't have been worse.
Speaker 3: And I never lose my temper like that, only around
Speaker 3: like when it involves children or animals, Like all bets
Speaker 3: are off, like I do not care if you think
Speaker 3: I'm an asshole. I never lose my temper around shit
Speaker 3: like that. I was like, I was like doing a helicopter.
Speaker 2: With a hammer. I'm like, who's got the yorkey in
Speaker 2: the page Cruiser? But did they? Do?
Speaker 1: They have the windows closed?
Speaker 2: Yes? Why?
Speaker 1: Like, explain to me why, Like, is someone allowed to
Speaker 1: have theirs if it's sixty five degrees outside? Is someone
Speaker 1: allowed to have their dog in the car if the
Speaker 1: windows open? Is that allowed? Would you small?
Speaker 2: Like?
Speaker 1: What what's the what's the actual rule? Are there no
Speaker 1: dogs allowed to be in any cars?
Speaker 2: No matter what?
Speaker 1: Windows open? Are closed?
Speaker 2: The window up in California? Is I believe pretty? I mean,
Speaker 2: because it's always hot here.
Speaker 1: And even if why would someone keep the windows up?
Speaker 1: I don't even understand. Just crack the window if you'll,
Speaker 1: let's say, desperate and you don't have pet care and
Speaker 1: you have to go in to get a prescription and
Speaker 1: you're an emergency, Like, why wouldn't someone just crack the
Speaker 1: window if it's like seventy five degrees? Okay, so only fans.
Speaker 1: I didn't really know what it is. And the name
Speaker 1: sounds really nice. It doesn't sound porny at all. And
Speaker 1: I was talking to Denise Richards about her being on
Speaker 1: it and her daughter being on it, and she was
Speaker 1: kind of saying, you could do anything on there. You
Speaker 1: don't have to be not wearing clothes, and she said
Speaker 1: you could be cooking. And I was like, oh, I
Speaker 1: could do my cottage cheese potato bagel program on there.
Speaker 1: She's like sure, and she's like, they probably probably prefer
Speaker 1: that you were like wearing laingerie. So what goes on
Speaker 1: on Only Fans? And then you were on OnlyFans TV
Speaker 1: and it was massive for you.
Speaker 3: Yes, I am doing the first stand up special for
Speaker 3: OnlyFans TV.
Speaker 2: Earlier in the year, I don't know.
Speaker 3: I'm sure you remember the roasts that were on Comedy Central,
Speaker 3: and you know, you know Joan Rivers and Johnald Trump,
Speaker 3: and you know, people started getting really scared of doing
Speaker 3: roast and I was like, you know what, I'm going
Speaker 3: to bring these back. Okay, let's just like elevate and
Speaker 3: be more clever and not make this bottom of the
Speaker 3: barrel trash roast the way it used to all be
Speaker 3: about women's appearances and men's dicks.
Speaker 1: And you know, there's actually I've been saying about reality television,
Speaker 1: I've been saying you should explore and not exploit. And
Speaker 1: it's not because I'm like killing the party. It's because
Speaker 1: I'm saying, like all this bullshit of just trashing women.
Speaker 1: Trashing women is not creative. You can have a good
Speaker 1: conflict without you know, throwing your leg on the dance floor.
Speaker 3: It's just on original. It's like we've seen it. Like now,
Speaker 3: it's like let's pivot, let's elevate, you know. It's like,
Speaker 3: you know, so I'm not saying don't talk about dix
Speaker 3: or vagina, just make it original.
Speaker 2: We've we've heard all this already, you know, Like I mean,
Speaker 2: and with Twitter and with you know, Instagram, we all
Speaker 2: as comedians have to.
Speaker 3: Level up and be more clever because I mean, I
Speaker 3: see these memes online that everyone's sharing that are hilarious,
Speaker 3: and I'm like, a comedian didn't make that. There's a
Speaker 3: lot of funny people out there, you know, like it's
Speaker 3: not just us, like we need to make funnier than
Speaker 3: all of this, you know. So we did want a
Speaker 3: roast of me and then a roast of berg Kreischer.
Speaker 3: We put them on OnlyFans TV. It's just of dot
Speaker 3: TV totally free. You don't have to put in a password.
Speaker 2: You don't have to you know, get charged four ninety
Speaker 2: nine and then have some weird subscription on your credit
Speaker 2: card for the rest of your life that you can't
Speaker 2: get rid of. You know, all of TV is doing
Speaker 2: some really interesting stuff and completely uncensored. So I wouldn't
Speaker 2: been able to do that at Netflix. I wouldn't have
Speaker 2: been able to do that at Hulu. Hulu's now owned
Speaker 2: by Disney like, so you had paid?
Speaker 1: Was it because only fans wanted to start? So you
Speaker 1: get paid. It's great for only fans, and it's a
Speaker 1: great and it's a content to the people model, which
Speaker 1: is my entire life now. Yeah, and everybody thinks, for
Speaker 1: some reason I would want to be on traditional television.
Speaker 1: I don't.
Speaker 2: I Well, then you can't. If you're going to be
Speaker 2: on traditional television these days, you can't make fun of
Speaker 2: the vaccine, you can't say certain things. I mean, YouTube
Speaker 2: now will age restrict certain things. I had this huge
Speaker 2: porn star on my podcast and it got age restricted.
Speaker 2: It got to monetize it.
Speaker 3: If you we have to bleep our podcast on YouTube
Speaker 3: now for the first half hour, or you basically, don't
Speaker 3: get an algorithm.
Speaker 1: I've literally been pitched so many shows in the last
Speaker 1: year or so, and there was I was going to
Speaker 1: do a show on Bravo that I backed out of
Speaker 1: because what I didn't want to do. Let's talk to
Speaker 1: the suits around the table. Let's get their watered down
Speaker 1: ideas that the suits think that they what they know,
Speaker 1: what's everyone's going to want to watch. Let's then wait
Speaker 1: six months to shoot it, then six months to edit it.
Speaker 1: Now all the store, all the day, all.
Speaker 2: The jokes are stale, and that funny Ukraine joke is
Speaker 2: now hacky, and you look like you're not as funny
Speaker 2: as you are, and like it's not topical. And here's
Speaker 2: the thing. All these suits, all these executives, like look,
Speaker 2: they go into these rooms and go, oh, let's look
Speaker 2: at Bethany's new show.
Speaker 3: They think they have to talk as their job. Like
Speaker 3: no one is able to go like I loved it.
Speaker 3: Should we adjourn the meeting? Let's error everyone because they're
Speaker 3: like jobs, I have to go.
Speaker 2: I don't know if I get that joke? Is she like?
Speaker 3: They have to overthink it as their job. They're getting
Speaker 3: paid four hundred thousand dollars a year. They think they
Speaker 3: have to do it to justify their existence. I remember
Speaker 3: one time I was doing a notes call with a
Speaker 3: studio and they schedule for a TV show. They schedule
Speaker 3: the notes call to be an hour, and I'm like,
Speaker 3: you guys don't even know how many notes. You haven't
Speaker 3: read the script yet, and you already have the notes
Speaker 3: called being an hour.
Speaker 2: You just have to fill this hour. Your job is
Speaker 2: to just fill this hour, to overthink.
Speaker 1: Things and you really analyze data versus going as a
Speaker 1: gut like really, no one.
Speaker 2: Gets promoted off of going like love it, let's air it,
Speaker 2: love it. They're like what you know?
Speaker 3: So it's it's their job to be critical and overthink
Speaker 3: things and create problems that aren't really there.
Speaker 2: Get it out. Let the audience decide you're not the
Speaker 2: target audience. You know. That's why I love focus groups.
Speaker 2: I say, give it to a focus group.
Speaker 1: I rather yeah, one hundred percent. Well, you have focus
Speaker 1: groups on social media also. People tell you they hate you,
Speaker 1: people tell you they love it. You could figure it out.
Speaker 1: So what's your model? Now you've done seven Netflix specials,
Speaker 1: what's your model? What's your relationship to doing Netflix specials?
Speaker 1: To going out on the road like you're pregnant, you're
Speaker 1: having a baby, Like, what's what's the whole soup look like?
Speaker 2: Now? I guess my big thing right now?
Speaker 3: You know, it's like I really just want to make
Speaker 3: sure that I'm doing specials in a lot of different
Speaker 3: places because you know, it's like I did these Comedy
Speaker 3: Central specials.
Speaker 2: I did, you know HBO specials. There's all these different
Speaker 2: people networks that ever. You know, now my HBO specials
Speaker 2: are on Paramount plus my Commedy Central specials, I don't
Speaker 2: even know where those are. So I think I'm at
Speaker 2: the point where I'm kind of want to own my
Speaker 2: own content so that when that works come and go,
Speaker 2: at least I'm able to have it. And okay, let's
Speaker 2: put it on Amazon now all right, let me take
Speaker 2: it back, and now I'll put it on Showtime. Okay,
Speaker 2: that's it. Now, I'll put it on YouTube, like yes, however,
Speaker 2: we actually get it to our audiences. And also it's
Speaker 2: important to me that it's free, you know, like comedy
Speaker 2: is different than a lot of other things. It's like
Speaker 2: because you might not like it, comedy's fashion. You know.
Speaker 2: I also need, we need to be able to cut
Speaker 2: it up so that people can consume it on TikTok
Speaker 2: or rumble or.
Speaker 1: You need the wing, you need the broth, you need
Speaker 1: to make a bunch of different things out of the
Speaker 1: same thing.
Speaker 2: I agree, I agree, it's gonna be a different platform
Speaker 2: in two years.
Speaker 3: Like that's the thing about OnlyFans TV is like I
Speaker 3: remember remember when Netflix first came out and they were like,
Speaker 3: will you.
Speaker 2: Do a special with us? And I was like, is
Speaker 2: this the place that throws DVDs and envelopes at your door?
Speaker 2: Like what I've always been a little bit.
Speaker 3: When Twitter came out, I was like, ugh, I'm not
Speaker 3: going to take pictures of my smoothies like I've always
Speaker 3: been a little bit, Like I'm a comic. It's embarrassing
Speaker 3: to promote yourself. I'm going to go with the established.
Speaker 3: But when you do that, you're just gonna be behind.
Speaker 3: So when they're like, oh FTV, I'm like, that's the
Speaker 3: next thing. Let me just jump on it, even if
Speaker 3: people make fun of me, even if people don't get.
Speaker 2: It and they think it's a poor and site, like
Speaker 2: I'd rather be and this is what I learned in
Speaker 2: real estate. I'd rather be the person everyone's like, oh,
Speaker 2: why are you moving there? And then I have the
Speaker 2: last laugh later.
Speaker 1: But it's much easier. What you didn't realize I'm in
Speaker 1: the same place as you. You didn't realize is it's
Speaker 1: much easier. I used to call up any komb like
Speaker 1: get the cameras because something is like I got my
Speaker 1: own cameras, Like get you all. I see behind you
Speaker 1: there are two cameras in there. It doesn't even have
Speaker 1: to be the best, best of the best quality. So
Speaker 1: you could be performing at some shit club and have
Speaker 1: some uncommon shoot it and ask them can I have
Speaker 1: this content and it's yours. I totally agree with you.
Speaker 3: That that's what people don't know. I mean, I remember
Speaker 3: when I was doing you know, Two Burke Girls. You know,
Speaker 3: people would come up to me and I'm not trying to,
Speaker 3: you know, self agrandize, but I'm just trying to make
Speaker 3: this point is they would come up to me and
Speaker 3: with tears in their eyes, and they'd be like, two
Speaker 3: work Girls change my life, and I change. I quit
Speaker 3: my horrible job and I started my own business because
Speaker 3: of you and because of watching Two Burke Girls. I've
Speaker 3: seen every episode backwards and forwards, and then My question.
Speaker 2: Was always what network is it on? And they'd be like, right, ah,
Speaker 2: no one knows.
Speaker 3: They google Bethany Frankel new TV show Bethany and whatever
Speaker 3: comes up.
Speaker 2: It's content to people, it's to be it's tree B,
Speaker 2: it's wee B, it's wha, it's Hulu, it's haha.
Speaker 3: Like it's always you know, Sisop came and went, TBS
Speaker 3: came and went. So for me, the last Netflix special
Speaker 3: I did, I paid for myself and then licensed to
Speaker 3: them this one.
Speaker 2: You know, licensing stuff.
Speaker 3: I think, you know it's gonna cost it's gonna cost
Speaker 3: you more in the short term, but then you're actually like,
Speaker 3: I mean, there's starting to get too granular here. But
Speaker 3: like there's huge comics like Sebastian, Joe Cooy, Gabriel and Glacias.
Speaker 3: These comics that are selling out fifty thousand seed arenas.
Speaker 2: These are some of the.
Speaker 3: Ones that Comedy Central didn't give specials to in the beginning,
Speaker 3: and they went, oh, I got to shoot my own special.
Speaker 3: I got it out of pocket, spend twenty grand and
Speaker 3: shoot it myself. But they're having the last laugh because
Speaker 3: they were able to put it on serious.
Speaker 2: And raw Dog and Spotify and they actually owned their content.
Speaker 1: Just a Sebastian Mescalco for my birthday in Atlantic City.
Speaker 2: The best, the best, the best.
Speaker 1: He is really because he's got the physical comedy angle.
Speaker 1: It's like the modern dice. Clay got that, but he
Speaker 1: really exaggerates the gestures and it really lands. And I
Speaker 1: thought he was great. He was great.
Speaker 2: I also love that Sebastian. I have a lot to
Speaker 2: learn from him.
Speaker 3: And sorry to sorry to keep going, but now now
Speaker 3: I also really want to like elevate I think that
Speaker 3: as a woman in comedy. Sorry to bring gender into it,
Speaker 3: I still believe in gender. Sorry guys, but uh, I
Speaker 3: think I'm ready to not.
Speaker 2: Have to lean on the like, oh look at me
Speaker 2: and my sneakers and hoodie and like I'm you know, a.
Speaker 1: Little comedy girl. You mean like that kind of thing.
Speaker 2: Yeah, just kind of like I think that, like self deprecation.
Speaker 2: I had to do that for a long time in
Speaker 2: order to, you know, feel like I wasn't you know,
Speaker 2: you know, I don't have to tell you like you
Speaker 2: are way more fearless than me around this kind of stuff.
Speaker 2: But I think that on a woman, like oh, you're
Speaker 2: so ambitious. I've heard that a lot.
Speaker 3: You're you're so Hollywood, like you're very networky, like if
Speaker 3: you have success or try I'm like, yeah, I'm a
Speaker 3: try hard I don't know what to tell you.
Speaker 2: I try really hard. I want to succeed.
Speaker 3: And I look at Sebastian and I'm like, this next
Speaker 3: phase is my sequin Blazer phase.
Speaker 2: It's my be dazzled headband phase. Like I'm gonna like.
Speaker 1: I'm doing whatever the fuck I want phase.
Speaker 3: Yeah, Like I can be funny and unapologetic and like
Speaker 3: feminine and I feel like a bumpet is in my future.
Speaker 3: I feel like like I can be more glad. I
Speaker 3: want to move towards being a little more glamorous. I
Speaker 3: don't have I don't have this narrative anymore that like
Speaker 3: women won't like me if I try hard or something.
Speaker 2: Well.
Speaker 1: When I was so growing up, I've always been into comedy.
Speaker 1: I remember I was a little kid when I was
Speaker 1: watching Delirious and Raw and George Carland. I've always been
Speaker 1: obsessed with SNL. My one dream in my life is
Speaker 1: to host SNL. It's the only dream that's unrealized. And
Speaker 1: I had an internship at NYU that I was given SNL,
Speaker 1: but m Y, you wouldn't give me the credit. So
Speaker 1: SNL wouldn't let me do it because at NY you
Speaker 1: wouldn't give me the credit. And I just stopped then.
Speaker 1: And I was so his years later because knowing who
Speaker 1: I am now, I would never have allowed that. I
Speaker 1: would have pushed through. So I've always been like comedy
Speaker 1: adjacent roast. I was on the whatever you call the
Speaker 1: Dais and I roasted Betty White at her like ninetieth
Speaker 1: birthday at the Friarschore. So I've always dabbled. I did
Speaker 1: stand up comedy one night and called all the comedians
Speaker 1: that I know.
Speaker 2: One of my entertainment heroes was Dennis Robin. I know
Speaker 2: that's random, but I remember watching him and going, he's
Speaker 2: a I was very serious basketball player, and it was
Speaker 2: like he's defense. This guy is putting on a show.
Speaker 2: He is die. People are spending eighty dollars to go
Speaker 2: see a game. Most people do not. They're getting a babysitter,
Speaker 2: they're paying god knows what for parking in an NBA game,
Speaker 2: and this guy is giving them a show. He's not
Speaker 2: too cool for school. He's like, I'm gonna blue hair.
Speaker 3: I'm gonna red hair, I'm gonna wear a wedding dress
Speaker 3: like and for me, I think a lot of comics
Speaker 3: are like, I'm just gonna lean against a wall and
Speaker 3: wear my brown hoodie and I'm barely here, and.
Speaker 2: I like to be unapologetically. I am putting on a
Speaker 2: show for you. I want to entertain you. I want
Speaker 2: to give you the best night of your life.
Speaker 1: I love that.
Speaker 2: I love that.
Speaker 1: I know it's so sure you have your opportunity up
Speaker 1: on stage, so go all in. That is absolutely true.
Speaker 1: It's funny because I never knew really who Travis Kelsey was,
Speaker 1: but watching a lot of his footage of him dancing
Speaker 1: on the field, like people want to see that.
Speaker 2: Great. And also, no one's mad at you if you
Speaker 2: shine too bright, And if they are, that's their problem.
Speaker 2: That's me and my mom.
Speaker 3: Shit, I think my mom was kind of like weirdly
Speaker 3: jealous of her kids, or like competitive, or maybe the
Speaker 3: scarcity complex. If I wanted female comics to like me
Speaker 3: and not think that I who knows, who gives a shit?
Speaker 1: That's good too, Yeah, because other comments you don't like,
Speaker 1: what the hell is she doing?
Speaker 2: I don't know? Yeah, why is she wearing bee? Dazzled.
Speaker 2: I get these, Betsy Johnson.
Speaker 3: I have a collection of be dazzled boots in every color,
Speaker 3: and I'm like, there's no more apologetic.
Speaker 2: Who me like in front of ten thousand people.
Speaker 3: Let's just like, all, if you want to wear that
Speaker 3: crazy thing, wear that crazy let's all just go start
Speaker 3: wearing capes like Own Rivers did and feather BoA's the
Speaker 3: way Philas Diller did. Who cares like We're dying.
Speaker 1: Well, I feel not fraudulent, but I've always wanted to
Speaker 1: do stand up and I did do it the one time,
Speaker 1: three minutes at the night. You call out to you,
Speaker 1: and I feel when you say, like, oh, you go
Speaker 1: get it, you go do it. I guess I feel
Speaker 1: fraudulent in the sense that I have never really didn't
Speaker 1: really go down that road because I went to the groundings,
Speaker 1: I took classes at Second City, Like I've always flirted
Speaker 1: with it. But I think my cop out is that
Speaker 1: when I do speaking engagements or appearances or on my podcast,
Speaker 1: I get to insert it. But it is different. Like
Speaker 1: I watch David Spain on TikTok. It's the funniest thing
Speaker 1: you've ever seen because he's doing different stand up jokes
Speaker 1: all day giving him away for free, and I feel
Speaker 1: like but he still goes on the road and really
Speaker 1: exercises the muscle, so I give you a lot of credit.
Speaker 3: Also, I'm very jealous because you and Denise Richards did
Speaker 3: a part two. I'm sorry I have to do another thing,
Speaker 3: but let's do it if you ever, but if you
Speaker 3: ever want to. I love talking to you and I
Speaker 3: want you to come up my kit if you will.
Speaker 2: I want to to do. We do have to get
Speaker 2: into our feud about the Hamptons.
Speaker 1: Yeah, and you talked about it on Kelly and Mark.
Speaker 1: All right, go have a baby. So nice to talk
Speaker 1: to you. It was really amazing and I'm so grateful
Speaker 1: and it was more than I thought it was going
Speaker 1: to be, which I thought a lot. So yay, I
Speaker 1: love you.
Speaker 2: Okay, I'm gonna text you you have a good day.
Speaker 2: Thanks for having me. Bye.
Speaker 1: Well that was we couldn't launch. We couldn't like launch
Speaker 1: the rocket or the plane couldn't take off because I
Speaker 1: had so much to say before even starting to talk,
Speaker 1: which is what was amazing. The foreplay was as good
Speaker 1: as the main act. She's awesome. Wow was that?
Speaker 2: I mean?
Speaker 1: I think that was my favorite and a long time.
Speaker 1: And that's the only person that I could really say
Speaker 1: that I've had on that would be amazing on a
Speaker 1: podcast with me like that was beyond And as a
Speaker 1: matter of fact, because I'm still a scaredy cat, maybe
Speaker 1: on her show, I'll do ten minutes with her, like
Speaker 1: just sitting fucking riff for ten minutes with her.