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Speaker 1: What would you talk about on your on your podcast

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Speaker 1: Firm Presents. I swear to you I've eaten eighteen thousand

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Speaker 1: cookies today. Did you pay for all of them? Yeah?

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Speaker 1: Pretty much? No, I really So we had cookies for

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Speaker 1: Kids Cancer come up and they brought thousands of cookies

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Speaker 1: and we were selling them in the hallways for a

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Speaker 1: Cookies for Kids Cancer, and people are eating them and

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Speaker 1: it's just it's everyone's on the sugar high. But everyone's

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Speaker 1: about to come down the sugar slope. Yeah, and we're

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Speaker 1: all going to just have a mass nap goodbye. I

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Speaker 1: think I see. I think Nate ate more cookies than anyone.

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Speaker 1: I had eight all told the smartest cookie. I think

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Speaker 1: I ate every single cookie that was brought in, every

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Speaker 1: single type of cookie, and I am crashing sugar high.

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Speaker 1: He looked like he was on drugs, like he was doing. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: it was what what's that? Scary? But where's your microphone?

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Speaker 1: Turn it on? But yeah, I don't know how to

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Speaker 1: turn you on. It's all fucked up. Anyway, we ate

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Speaker 1: a lot of cookies and now we're all coming down. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: there were a lot scary. Just moved my backpack off

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Speaker 1: of a seat, so that he could sit on it

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Speaker 1: and it was exploding with cookies. Yeah, I'm supposed to

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Speaker 1: go work out today. I think I'd rather just go

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Speaker 1: have lunch and go home. Cookie bring your trainer cookies. Alright.

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Speaker 1: So anyway, Uh, it's really funny. But right before we

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Speaker 1: started the podcast, Brody was asking us riddles. I love

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Speaker 1: riddles too. Yeah, well I asked them all, like I

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Speaker 1: went through, like now we know all the answers. Yeah.

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Speaker 1: I did the the aspurn one and the twins and

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Speaker 1: here the aspirin dle. A riddle was. The riddle is

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Speaker 1: if a doctor gives you three pills and tells you

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Speaker 1: to take one every half hour, how long before they're

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Speaker 1: all gone? An hour? Right, But everybody says an hour

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Speaker 1: and a half because it's three times a half hour, right.

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Speaker 1: But you've taken quite a number of pills in your life,

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Speaker 1: so you knew that. I knew it was coming, so

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Speaker 1: I had to think it through. Well, it couldn't be

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Speaker 1: the obvious, but people always gets the three. I wouldn't

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Speaker 1: be asking you as a riddle if it was three.

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Speaker 1: And I have a riddle if you guys want one.

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Speaker 1: This one was going around a couple of months ago.

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Speaker 1: So if you've seen it, do not answer. But the

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Speaker 1: question is, someone's mother has four sons, north west and south?

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Speaker 1: What is the name of the fourth son? Private message

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Speaker 1: me with the name. What's the name of the fourth son?

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Speaker 1: That's the that's what we're trying to get. What what

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Speaker 1: is the name of the fourth son? What was the riddle? Again? Sorry,

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Speaker 1: someone's mother has four sons? Someone north west and south?

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Speaker 1: What is the name of the fourth son? Message the

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Speaker 1: name of the fourth son? Someone? No? Elvis was correct?

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Speaker 1: What's what she just told you? What mother? What is

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Speaker 1: the name? Could be someone? But here's the thing. If

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Speaker 1: you debate the riddle, someone here the problem. Here's the problem, Brodie,

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Speaker 1: is that there's a question mark. There should be a

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Speaker 1: question mark if it was what is the name of

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Speaker 1: the fourth son? Question mark? It says, what is the

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Speaker 1: name of the fourth son? Period? Yeah, stupid riddle. I've

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Speaker 1: read right into your mind. You did, got all right.

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Speaker 1: You walk into a room that contains a match, a

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Speaker 1: kerosene lamp, a candle, and a fireplace. What would you like?

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Speaker 1: First the match? You see a boat filled with people,

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Speaker 1: yet there isn't a single person on board. How is

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Speaker 1: that possible? Coronavirus. You see a boat filled with people,

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Speaker 1: yet there isn't a single person on board. Filled with people.

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Speaker 1: They're all couples. No, you said single people. There isn't

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Speaker 1: a single person on board. But I think couples are

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Speaker 1: better than I've got fifty five cents in two coins.

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Speaker 1: One of them is not a nickel. How do I

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Speaker 1: do it? How I do it? Two coins equals? One

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Speaker 1: of them is not a nickel. Two coins, one of

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Speaker 1: them is not the other one is. What can you

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Speaker 1: break even if you never pick it up or touch

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Speaker 1: it with the speed of sound? The law a promise

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Speaker 1: machine of answers, But they're all good. Yeah, I thought

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Speaker 1: breaking window favorite. I am white when I'm dirty, and

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Speaker 1: I'm black when I'm clean. What am I? Your soap?

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Speaker 1: Who cares a blackboard? What is full of holes but

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Speaker 1: still holds water? A theory? Danielle just shows up and

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Speaker 1: so here she goes coming out of swinging. So a

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Speaker 1: man leaves home and turns left three times, only to

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Speaker 1: return home facing two men wearing masks. Who are those

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Speaker 1: two men baseball players? The catcher and the umpire's right fan.

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Speaker 1: There's a one story house in which everything is yellow, yellow, walls,

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Speaker 1: yellow doors, yellow furniture. What color are the stairs? There

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Speaker 1: are no stairs. It's a one story house. Lady. The

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Speaker 1: more unless it's to the porch. The more you take,

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Speaker 1: don't think. The more you take, the more you leave behind.

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Speaker 1: What am I a breath? Footsteps? I'm just picking up.

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Speaker 1: The more you dry the weather it is I had,

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Speaker 1: he said, what before you? It is? I have branches,

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Speaker 1: but no fruit, trunk or leaves. What am I a bank?

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Speaker 1: How are you looking at the same website? You know what.

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Speaker 1: I'm older than five. These have been around for a

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Speaker 1: long time. And by the way, you guys are reading online,

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Speaker 1: I don't have access to these. How about that. I'm

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Speaker 1: just using my brain power. Can they do the one

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Speaker 1: about the mother and the doctor? Can you need three

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Speaker 1: consecutive days without you just found that one without using

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Speaker 1: the words Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, for Saturday or Sunday?

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Speaker 1: Name three consecutive days, the fourth, fifth, and sixth, Yesterday, today,

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Speaker 1: and tomorrow. I don't know, New Year's Eve, New Year's Day,

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Speaker 1: and the day. This is the worst podcast. This is

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Speaker 1: the worst podcast ever. It was better yesterday talking about

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Speaker 1: meat meat ball recipes in a minute twice in a moment,

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Speaker 1: but never in a thousand years. The letter, m alright,

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Speaker 1: so what else is going on? Every kiss begins with kay.

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Speaker 1: We were also talking about scary movies. What movie actually

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Speaker 1: scares you, because there's a lot of started that. We're

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Speaker 1: talking about the movie Alien, Alien Alien. The original Aliens

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Speaker 1: is a sequel with Sigourney Weaver. Weaver in the original,

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Speaker 1: and I thought that was a scary movie because it

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Speaker 1: was one of those movies where ship just pops out

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Speaker 1: of nowhere and scares you. Because that's really the only

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Speaker 1: thing that scares me is being startled. But some people say,

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Speaker 1: well mind trippy satanic films freaked them out, not me, please,

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Speaker 1: I run with the devil every day, doesn't scare me. Yeah.

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Speaker 1: The one that scared me the so I don't think

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Speaker 1: it really scares that many people, but it really messed

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Speaker 1: with me. Paranormal Activity the first one. Really, I wasn't

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Speaker 1: scared it all except for the light switch. Were like,

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Speaker 1: you laughed at it scared me about that movie? What scary?

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Speaker 1: Trying to hold my hand? I was scared from that.

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Speaker 1: You know what movie scared me? And I love the

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Speaker 1: fact that they do the conjuring movies. Yeah, the conjuring

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Speaker 1: like that. The whole series are fantastic, and it takes

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Speaker 1: a lot to get me going. Hereditary was really scary too.

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Speaker 1: That's like a mine trippy weird, just kind of the

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Speaker 1: imagery of it. It was really weird. And I told

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Speaker 1: Andrew how much it terrified me, and he says, oh

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Speaker 1: my god, there's another one by the same guy. It's worse.

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Speaker 1: You should watch it. I don't want to watch The

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Speaker 1: Midsummer Never see that movie. Teeth the Vagina, Yeah, yeah, yeah,

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Speaker 1: that's that's terrible. Vagina with teeth scare a lot and

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Speaker 1: it bites it off. Vagina vendata. Yeah, it's actually like

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Speaker 1: it's ons have teeth. I'm gonna go watch this movie.

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Speaker 1: Did anybody else get scared by the sixth sense? No? No, no,

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Speaker 1: it's really scaredy. But I went back and watched it

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Speaker 1: again immediately. Remember you already knew the punchline. Yeah, there's

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Speaker 1: a there's a mistake of that movie, and I can't

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Speaker 1: figure out, like how no one else remember when you

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Speaker 1: give away the ending? And then people were super pissed.

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Speaker 1: It was five years later, it was It was a

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Speaker 1: lot later after the movie came out and people I

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Speaker 1: gave me the ending and the whole premise the secret

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Speaker 1: to six cents, and people got mad at me. I'm like,

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Speaker 1: it's been five years, boiler alert. What's the mistake in

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Speaker 1: the film? Do you guys remember the film? So the

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Speaker 1: whole movie, he's interacting with people, and he has dinner

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Speaker 1: with the wife doesn't talk to him, so he thinks

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Speaker 1: she's mad at him. But when they go to visit

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Speaker 1: the kids teacher, the son's teacher, right, he sits in

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Speaker 1: the office with the wife and the principal, And wouldn't

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Speaker 1: he have asked the principle of question. Wouldn't the principle

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Speaker 1: have said something to him. That's the only scene that

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Speaker 1: makes no sense that he was not really there. And

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Speaker 1: then he doesn't come out of the meeting and talked

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Speaker 1: to his wife about what they just heard. It was

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Speaker 1: a mistake. It's just a poorly written scene. I'm just saying,

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Speaker 1: go back and watch it. You're like, yeah, anthing else

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Speaker 1: was brilliant. That scene makes no sense to I must

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Speaker 1: assumed that the majority of people listening to this podcast

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Speaker 1: right now I have not seen sixth Well, then let's

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Speaker 1: not ruin the ending again for them. But we go

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Speaker 1: see the movie. Go see it. It's in a theater.

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Speaker 1: I'm sure you need to go see it in your

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Speaker 1: living room. Yeah, it really is amazing how you can

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Speaker 1: literally just press a button and watch any movie you want,

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Speaker 1: song or song, a song you've ever written. I remember

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Speaker 1: not to date myselves or ourselves. You would wait and

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Speaker 1: go to Blockbuster and pray that nobody had pulled all

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Speaker 1: of the new releases, Like if the sixth Cents just

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Speaker 1: come out, my god, I hope there's one copy left.

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Speaker 1: And then if there was none behind the little cases

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Speaker 1: for three years for to air on television, and they

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Speaker 1: would edit everything out. God horn on our phones, like

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Speaker 1: I'm sitting here with my my dog. Max looks like

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Speaker 1: a statue. He's such a handsome little boy. He's so

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Speaker 1: uninterested in what we're talking. He doesn't speak English. Maybe

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Speaker 1: it's part see. I think animals do understand. I think

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Speaker 1: they can totally understand what's going on. Like if you

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Speaker 1: can teach them just one word, why only one word?

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Speaker 1: Why could they not understand the rest? Max understands things

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Speaker 1: like I say let's go, and he'll follow me. You

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Speaker 1: want to go outside like that? And he understands if

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Speaker 1: you're sad. Watch you want some chicken. You know he's

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Speaker 1: sitting right on the board, and as we know, that's

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Speaker 1: not the first time Doggy Style has been in that spot.

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Speaker 1: My cat understand words. My cats understand eat, snack and knap. Think.

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Speaker 1: If I say you want to take a napple, mama,

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Speaker 1: they like, come and follow. Do they understand when you

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Speaker 1: say I wish you were a dog? No, I don't.

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Speaker 1: I don't wish they were a dog. I don't want

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Speaker 1: a dog, So up your butt. I love your cats.

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Speaker 1: I love watching your Instagram stories. Cats and dogs. I'm

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Speaker 1: fine with I love cats. I actually no cats better

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Speaker 1: than I know dogs. He had so many, David, I didn't.

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Speaker 1: He looks He's looking at me as if I'm insulting him. No,

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Speaker 1: I'm just again, he doesn't understand English. I'm fascinated the

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Speaker 1: way cats just love going into boxes, any box, anytime

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Speaker 1: in the sink, any anything that like kind of cuddles

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Speaker 1: them like that. It's kind of cool, scary. You love

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Speaker 1: Daniel's cats, I do. Would you pick one up? Yeah? Yeah,

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Speaker 1: why not? He doesn't pick up animals. He's terrified, though

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Speaker 1: I do want a cat. You really should learn how

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Speaker 1: to pick up a cat before you get with yeah,

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Speaker 1: I probably should, but I'm not going to get a cat.

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Speaker 1: You want a cat for the Instagram pictures, admit it.

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Speaker 1: Not why I want a cat? Then why do you

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Speaker 1: want a cat? If you go on my Instagram discovery

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Speaker 1: page right now, you'll probably see, like every other picture

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Speaker 1: will be of a kitten. I tell you, there's nothing

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Speaker 1: I love more than than lying down on the bed

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Speaker 1: and Max just curling up right next to you. And

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Speaker 1: as little as he is, he's ten pounds if if that,

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Speaker 1: he can kick you off a bed without you knowing it.

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Speaker 1: He slowly moves you across the bed and at the

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Speaker 1: end of the night, half of your body is hanging

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Speaker 1: off the bed. He just knows how to do it.

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Speaker 1: And it's because you don't want to inconvenience him at

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Speaker 1: all or make him uncomfortable, so you just keep moving

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Speaker 1: and moving and they know it. He takes advantage. I'm

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Speaker 1: into it. We've done a lot on this podcast. Have

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Speaker 1: you know, Garrett, you and your family recently lost a dog,

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Speaker 1: and so now you have a dog, we have two kids.

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Speaker 1: Have you thought about getting another dog? Not yet, maybe

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Speaker 1: in a couple of years, only because we just got

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Speaker 1: our new uh Auese doodles, Scarlett and uh. I think

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Speaker 1: it's weird for me personally just to bring a new

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Speaker 1: dog in so quickly after we just got a new dog,

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Speaker 1: and I just thought it how to pee outside? How

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Speaker 1: about another kid? Yeah? No, no, I'm good. I have

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Speaker 1: no place to sleep in my own bed. It's crazy,

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Speaker 1: you know, on the floor. Our friends Lee and in Ricardo,

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Speaker 1: they have two massive dogs and the both of them

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Speaker 1: sleep in the bed with them every night. I'm like,

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Speaker 1: how do you do it? They're like, you just have

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Speaker 1: to learn how to curl around them because they're in charge.

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Speaker 1: The dogs are they're the dominant ones. Like, I have

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Speaker 1: no place to go. And then then my son comes

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Speaker 1: into bed, Then my daughter wants to come to bed.

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Speaker 1: Then my wife's in bed, like I, when do you

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Speaker 1: have sex? When are you having a third kid? That

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Speaker 1: way before they like the moment they all fall as sleep.

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Speaker 1: I have a few minutes with a kid in the bed. No, no,

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Speaker 1: before before they come into the bed, into the bedroom,

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Speaker 1: hurry get in there exactly. Okay, back to riddles riddle.

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Speaker 1: I was actually just thinking about my grandmother. My grandmother

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Speaker 1: had a cat, and I remember I wanted to play

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Speaker 1: with the cat and I'm allergic to cats. Grandmother's trying

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Speaker 1: to kill you? Is this a riddle? No, I was

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Speaker 1: just thinking. I just this memory came up to me,

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Speaker 1: and I remember she had to take me to the

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Speaker 1: hospital because my as well said, was it on your

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Speaker 1: birthday too? No, he's not on the garage. Does anyone

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Speaker 1: have a happy story? I was just thinking about that.

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Speaker 1: How about happy riddle? Can we counter looking for ridd?

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Speaker 1: Nate walks into the emergency room and his grandmother's come on,

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Speaker 1: that was the nurse's name. By the way, you know

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Speaker 1: this podcast, I guess your mother see what it's like

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Speaker 1: to be in the room with us when there's no

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Speaker 1: microphones on, Because this is the bullshit we talk about.

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Speaker 1: It's just a stream of consciousness. It's like, I don't

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Speaker 1: know sure. Hey, we talked on a previous podcast about

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Speaker 1: a month ago maybe about how we don't tell people

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Speaker 1: where we work and what we do. So I had

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Speaker 1: a volunteer at my at my kids school this past

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Speaker 1: weekend and I'm sitting at a table of four people

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Speaker 1: and the person next to me turns to her left

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Speaker 1: and says to other two people, So, because we didn't

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Speaker 1: know each other, So what do you guys do for

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Speaker 1: a living? And they went through their jobs and pharmaceutical

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Speaker 1: and administrative and and so I saw it turning towards

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Speaker 1: me and I went, oh, what kind of phone is that?

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Speaker 1: And we start talking about phones. I distracted or so

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Speaker 1: I never had to talk about what I do. Look

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Speaker 1: at you? Why are you embarrassed about what you do?

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Speaker 1: It's just you guys know, it turns into a hole.

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Speaker 1: Oh I listen to Howard or the radio or what's

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Speaker 1: except for that one? Right? I know. I used to

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Speaker 1: listen to my kids listen to my husband, like did

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Speaker 1: I don't? I just rather not unless I know they're fans,

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Speaker 1: in which case, you know, it's interesting. But otherwise they're like, yeah,

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Speaker 1: oh so if they're not interested in you, you can't

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Speaker 1: have the conversation because I just said why they get

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Speaker 1: into the whole why they don't like I didn't ask

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Speaker 1: that question. You're right, it's weird. And then they ask

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Speaker 1: you about all the celebrities and you're like, you know, Elvis,

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Speaker 1: like we should come up with a better, uh list

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Speaker 1: of topics for Tomorrow's why did you guys listen to

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Speaker 1: this Today? Fifteen minute morning show off