Speaker 1: You're listening to Comedy Central. Wow from New York City,
Speaker 1: the only city in America. It's the shows and the
Speaker 1: intention news. It's the Daily Show with your host us
Speaker 1: in mid Huns. Thank you, welcome the Daily Show. I'm
Speaker 1: not the Mad High. This is the American dream. Baby. Look,
Speaker 1: I worked here for five years just so I could
Speaker 1: substitute teach for a week. Now, we got so much
Speaker 1: to talk about, so let's get right to the headlines. Now. Look,
Speaker 1: there's so many pressing issues in the world right now.
Speaker 1: The war in Ukraine, a train derailment in Ohio, natural
Speaker 1: disasters in Turkey. But we can't talk about any of
Speaker 1: that because apparently the biggest story in the newspaper is
Speaker 1: on the comics page. Newspapers across the country are dropping
Speaker 1: the Dilbert comics strip after its creator, Scott Adams, went
Speaker 1: on a tirade this weekend, calling Black Americans a hate
Speaker 1: group and advising white people to stay away from them.
Speaker 1: The Dilbert creator referencing a poll that indicated fifty three
Speaker 1: of black Americans agree with the statement it's okay to
Speaker 1: be white if you know nearly half of all blacks
Speaker 1: are not okay with white people. That's a hate group.
Speaker 1: The best advice I would give to white people is
Speaker 1: to get the hell away from black people. You just
Speaker 1: have to escape. So that's what I did. I went
Speaker 1: to a neighborhood where, you know, I have a very
Speaker 1: low black population. Oh my god. He just kept going.
Speaker 1: He's like, black people are a hate group. White people
Speaker 1: should stay away from black people. I stay away from
Speaker 1: black people. And Kanye heard this and was like, whoa
Speaker 1: my brother. Base yourself. By the way, Scott Adams, why
Speaker 1: do you have a podcast? You have one of the
Speaker 1: most successful comic strips in the world, but you're podcasting
Speaker 1: at YouTube dot com. Backslash Real Coffee with Scott Adams, like, why, bro,
Speaker 1: you got rich off of doodles? Take the w be happy.
Speaker 1: The guy who created that cool s thing from middle
Speaker 1: school wishes he could be you. Now. I'll be honest
Speaker 1: with you, guys. It's been a minute since we talked,
Speaker 1: and I've rubbed shoulders with the illuminati, and I've noticed
Speaker 1: one thing about a certain type of rich person. When
Speaker 1: they don't have problems of their own, they have to
Speaker 1: just make up problems just to make their lives interesting. Right,
Speaker 1: They're just like sitting at home and the jacuzzi, Like,
Speaker 1: what if I tweet about trans high school swimmers, I
Speaker 1: can guarantee you JK. Rawling had zero opinions about trans
Speaker 1: people when she was on welfare. By the way, this
Speaker 1: is why I think we need a wealth tax. We
Speaker 1: need a wealth tax, not for infrastructure, schools, none of
Speaker 1: that Bernie shit. Rich people, This is for your own good.
Speaker 1: The wealth tax is actually a shut the up tax.
Speaker 1: Spend more time working, kissing your loved ones, getting groceries,
Speaker 1: you know, being a normal person, because normal people don't
Speaker 1: hate black people. We're all too busy hating that one
Speaker 1: squeaky wheel on the shopping cart. But let's move on
Speaker 1: to one of the greatest debates of our time. No,
Speaker 1: I'm not talking about how much cocaine a bear can do.
Speaker 1: I'm talking about the COVID origin debate, which is heating
Speaker 1: up this week. And this just ends an updated classified
Speaker 1: intel report saying that the US Department of Energy has
Speaker 1: a sessed that the source of the COVID nineteen pandemic
Speaker 1: likely came from a China lab leak. But there is
Speaker 1: one major caveat sources at the Department of Energy and
Speaker 1: tells and that the report has quote low confidence, low confidence.
Speaker 1: How can you conclude something with low confidence? That's not
Speaker 1: a conclusion. I think the word you're looking for is guess.
Speaker 1: By the way, conclusion with low confidence is such a
Speaker 1: boy move, Like you're dating someone and they go, babe,
Speaker 1: what are we and you're like, Sarah, I can tell
Speaker 1: you for sure. I don't know how even though they
Speaker 1: had low confidence, the Department of Energy came out and
Speaker 1: said COVID was a lableek. And now every idiot I
Speaker 1: went to high school with is like, apologize to me
Speaker 1: right now, huston, I told you I was right. And
Speaker 1: if your hand is bigger than your face, you're gay.
Speaker 1: Now to everybody touchdown dancing about this, how long have
Speaker 1: you been rocking with the Department of Energy? Oh, you've
Speaker 1: been talking with them since day one. Hey, what's your
Speaker 1: second favorite report from the Department of Energy? Now, personally
Speaker 1: I love their report on walking freezers and coolers. But hey,
Speaker 1: that's just me because I'm a real one. But here's
Speaker 1: the key detail everybody's forgetting while they got the Twitter fingers.
Speaker 1: The Energy Department is one of nine intelligence groups that
Speaker 1: have assessed COVID's origins. Two have said Lableek five say
Speaker 1: it came out of natural causes. In two say they
Speaker 1: don't know, and you know what, I personally side with them.
Speaker 1: I don't know what is going on. FBI says this,
Speaker 1: and C says that I'm holding out until the DMV
Speaker 1: chimes in. All right, Now, here's the thing I'm wondering. Okay,
Speaker 1: why did this whole lab league versus wet market thing
Speaker 1: become the Yankees versus Red sox of the culture War
Speaker 1: in the first place? And to me, I think it's
Speaker 1: because when some people started saying it came from a
Speaker 1: lab other people were like, Hey, you can't say the
Speaker 1: Chinese are trying to poison everybody on planet Earth. That's racist.
Speaker 1: You should say COVID came from a wet market where
Speaker 1: Chinese people eat weird animals. But that sounds way more racist.
Speaker 1: And I say this as a kid who had to
Speaker 1: eat weird ethnic food in the lunchroom every day. I'd
Speaker 1: pull out my kima roti and everybody else would be like, oh,
Speaker 1: what is that. All I wanted was lunchables, but my
Speaker 1: mom would never buy them. She'd be like, Hussan, are
Speaker 1: you crazy? You want lunchables? Those things are made in
Speaker 1: a lab and they'll kill you. And she said that
Speaker 1: with high confidence. Now, for more on the lab league,
Speaker 1: we turned to my friend, colleague and mortal enemy, Ronnie Shang.
Speaker 1: Ronnie oh Man, thank you for joining us. Look, let's
Speaker 1: get right into it. Where did COVID come from? Tell
Speaker 1: us what the how? I know why you're asking me.
Speaker 1: By the way, I didn't do it. We could be
Speaker 1: talking about the debt ceiling on racist Dilberg. But of
Speaker 1: course you want to pigeonhole the Asian guy to do
Speaker 1: the COVID story. Yes, yes, yes, I'm going to pigeonhole you.
Speaker 1: You want to know why, Ronnie, because when I was
Speaker 1: a correspondent, I was pigeonholed. My whole was pigeoned constantly.
Speaker 1: That's the disgusting. Yeah, it was. Anytime there was a
Speaker 1: subway bombing. They went to the Muslim guy. As if
Speaker 1: I'm on group chat with isis My most viral clip
Speaker 1: on this show was a photo of me wearing a
Speaker 1: hit job next to John Stewart, you understand. So, yeah,
Speaker 1: the Asian guy has to cover the Asian story, and
Speaker 1: it has to be funny, and it has to be
Speaker 1: deemed commedially acceptable by vulture dot com. Go. Okay, first
Speaker 1: of all, Vulture, all right, And second of all, why
Speaker 1: don't you talk about it? You want to explain lecturing
Speaker 1: us about the world just might never having left America? Right,
Speaker 1: aren't you Asian? Two? You talk about it? Na, Na,
Speaker 1: you're setting yourself. Ronnie, you said it right here on
Speaker 1: this show that Indians were not real Asians. Why don't
Speaker 1: you roll the tape? Indians are not Asians? Okay, Okay,
Speaker 1: A lot about Indians trying to have it both ways,
Speaker 1: like being Indian and Asian. Pick a lane, I brought
Speaker 1: receipts other okay, well, yeah, you keep your receipts or
Speaker 1: worth your fifty air Jordan's shoe boxes. All right? Yeah,
Speaker 1: I said you didn't have to roll the tape because
Speaker 1: I'll say it again right now, Indians are not Asians.
Speaker 1: And by the way, I'm more than just Asian, all right.
Speaker 1: I also live in Australia. So why don't you ask
Speaker 1: me about kangaroos? Fine, Ronnie, tell us about kangaroos. All right, Well,
Speaker 1: I'm glad you asked. Well, there's red giant kangaroos and
Speaker 1: then there's gray ones, and the red ones can jump
Speaker 1: ten feet high and they have closet can rip your
Speaker 1: dick off through your jeans. No, we'll get the shit
Speaker 1: about kangaroos. Okay, stop talking like an angry snapple cap.
Speaker 1: You don't get decide what is on this show, Ronnie,
Speaker 1: I'm the boss. I decide, Ronnie. I mean when you
Speaker 1: decide your guest host. Okay, the operative one is guest
Speaker 1: guest in my house. Okay. I'm not your token Asian guy.
Speaker 1: I'm in movies now. I was in Megan. Oh yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: oh you were. You were in the movie Megan in
Speaker 1: theaters right now? Hey, what was your role Alan Meghan?
Speaker 1: I played a token Asian guy in the tech company.
Speaker 1: But it was sad tire. It was sad hire. That's
Speaker 1: weird because I could have sworn that I'm your boss
Speaker 1: right now, because it says my name on the desk.
Speaker 1: It says The Daily Show with Hassan Minhaj, which, by
Speaker 1: the way, that's my real name, Ronnie Chang. I'm run
Speaker 1: each Ronnie Day. I'm Ronnie is also my real name,
Speaker 1: you idiot's on my birth certificate. Oh should I be
Speaker 1: like you and get a name that you refuse to
Speaker 1: spell phonetically and then when everyone mispronounces it. You try
Speaker 1: to ellen. Oh, oh it's spell Hassan and they called
Speaker 1: me Hassan. Yeah yeah, if I find Ronnie fine, Yeah,
Speaker 1: I expressed some emotion. I showed some vulnerability, unlike you,
Speaker 1: I showed some other emotion besides anger. It's something you
Speaker 1: might not be familiar with. Oh no, no, no, I
Speaker 1: know you know all about anger. You love the job.
Speaker 1: What you can rage about evil corporations in America. But
Speaker 1: as soon as the NBA reaches at about the celebrity
Speaker 1: All Star game, you jump at the chang to called
Speaker 1: zero points. Zero points Ronnie. Stop it, come on, stop,
Speaker 1: stop stop this, stop stop it right now. We can't
Speaker 1: be fighting like this. There's white people here. How are
Speaker 1: we going to stop Asian hate if we hate each other? Oh,
Speaker 1: you're right. I'm sorry. I'm just slashing out because I
Speaker 1: actually love The Daily Show and I'm scared you're gonna
Speaker 1: get canceled like your Netflix show. Whatever it was called,
Speaker 1: it's called Patriot. It doesn't matter, okay, because despite our difference,
Speaker 1: is You're right, we do have a bigger responsibility to
Speaker 1: the Asians and the Asians watching this because when we fight,
Speaker 1: the white people win. And we can't have that exactly.
Speaker 1: We got to bring the segment home. So let's each
Speaker 1: say something nice about each other and show some emotional growth.
Speaker 1: What are you serious? I'm dead serious. All right, Hussan.
Speaker 1: You're good at managing hair. Thank you. Your energy is
Speaker 1: not always annoying. And you know I've seen you at
Speaker 1: The Daily Show grow to become this force of nature.
Speaker 1: And I'm actually really happy that you're hosting this week.
Speaker 1: Gets really good. Shut up, everybody, shut up, Thank you, Ronnie.
Speaker 1: And I just want to say, um, I want to
Speaker 1: take this moment to tell you we're out of time.
Speaker 1: Ronnie Chang. Everyone all right, when we come back, I'm
Speaker 1: going back to school, so don't go away. Welcome back
Speaker 1: to the Daily Show. You know, we live in a
Speaker 1: polarized era where nobody wants to sit down and have
Speaker 1: a conversation. Well I did, and I regretted it. Take
Speaker 1: a look as the culture wars ripped through America, one
Speaker 1: thing that always comes up is the children. We have
Speaker 1: one job, and that's to protect our children. Protecting children
Speaker 1: from you know, sexual indoctrination, critical race theory, things like that,
Speaker 1: banning books, especially these books endanger as our children. But
Speaker 1: as the father of a child about to start school,
Speaker 1: I wanted to know about how they felt about the
Speaker 1: culture wars, and more importantly, I look, you wanted to
Speaker 1: know if they thought I was cool. So instead of
Speaker 1: tweeting about the kids, I decided to talk to them.
Speaker 1: I don't know if you know this, but I'm a
Speaker 1: little bit older, and there's a lot of Okay, there's
Speaker 1: a lot of stuff that I'm not aware of. So
Speaker 1: I'm going to name something and then you tell me
Speaker 1: what you think about it. Adults are arguing a lot
Speaker 1: right now about what you should be learning, what subjects
Speaker 1: you should be taught, well, books you should be reading,
Speaker 1: But we never asked you. How do you feel about school?
Speaker 1: What are your favorite books? What books are you guys
Speaker 1: reading right now? I love like racial justice books because
Speaker 1: I feel like I can relate to that a lot,
Speaker 1: like they hate you give or like blended. How do
Speaker 1: you feel about people wanting to ban those books? Not good?
Speaker 1: Because like I feel like you need to This is
Speaker 1: it's what's happening in the world right now, Like racial
Speaker 1: injustice is happening right now, and these books are about
Speaker 1: racial injustice, so people need to learn about it. If
Speaker 1: they want to do something about it. Do you feel
Speaker 1: like your teachers are trying to indoctrinate you? No? Do
Speaker 1: you know what the word indoctrinate means? Brentley, let's talk
Speaker 1: about this. Thoughts on the president in the court administration.
Speaker 1: I think it's good. Yeah, I like it. I feel
Speaker 1: like he's a lot better than Chump in my opinion. Sure,
Speaker 1: I feel like he's not the best president. We've definitely
Speaker 1: got better presidents, but he's a big step up Chump.
Speaker 1: What about this era feels different from other presidential He's
Speaker 1: definitely older than other presidents. How old is too old
Speaker 1: to be president? Too old to be a president is
Speaker 1: an age where you're scared that you might not live
Speaker 1: to see the next day because a country is depending
Speaker 1: on you right to run them. Also, as long as
Speaker 1: you don't have any like mental health problems, like say
Speaker 1: you have dementia and you're sort of losing your memory
Speaker 1: a little bit, And people with dementia they're perfectly good people,
Speaker 1: but they're probably not the best kind of person to
Speaker 1: run a country because they might not remember everything. Yeah,
Speaker 1: you're eerily describing what Joseph ar Biden is going through
Speaker 1: right now. But despite their scathing agism. What surprised me
Speaker 1: is that the kids I talk to aren't steeped in
Speaker 1: the culture wars like the adults. They're too busy trying
Speaker 1: to figure out how to be kids. This is something
Speaker 1: a lot of men in their thirties don't talk about feelings.
Speaker 1: How do you process things when you're sad or angry?
Speaker 1: I kind of get mad at my parents when a
Speaker 1: blood I'm mad at them. I kind of don't like him.
Speaker 1: I only go to my roomb, like they'll come in
Speaker 1: and they always think they're like, so I'm going to apologize.
Speaker 1: They want to be right when sometimes they're not right,
Speaker 1: Like they just can't say sorry sometimes. But if parents
Speaker 1: said sorry, then that means parents and children are equal. Well,
Speaker 1: you can't have that. They can't are the things adults
Speaker 1: tell you that you're like, no way, I don't believe
Speaker 1: that sometimes, Like when they said something when I was younger,
Speaker 1: I thought they were lying, Like what what do they
Speaker 1: say that? You're like, that's not true. If you roll
Speaker 1: your eyes too much, is gonna get stuck up there.
Speaker 1: I used to cross my eyes. I would do it
Speaker 1: like as a joke of phone, and then my dad
Speaker 1: would be like exactly. It's not true. Well I thought
Speaker 1: that would actually happens. Go ahead, what's up? So? Has
Speaker 1: I know if your parents ever told you when you
Speaker 1: turned the car like the car laid on like that,
Speaker 1: it's illegal to leave it on. Yeah? I found out
Speaker 1: it's not illegal. How did you find out? Just I
Speaker 1: saw on like YouTube? I'm like, what the heck? Let's
Speaker 1: talk about social media? Are we on social media? TikTok? Instagram? Facebook? Twitter?
Speaker 1: I feel like Twitter. I think it's like old people
Speaker 1: turned into like you know how like Facebook, like died.
Speaker 1: Twitter is kind of like dying. My dad is obsessed
Speaker 1: with Twitter. Do you think Twitter is good for him?
Speaker 1: Maybe a little less would be good, but I don't
Speaker 1: think it's getting out of hand? Got it? Do you
Speaker 1: want to join Twitter based on the way your dad
Speaker 1: uses it? Not? Really? I don't have much interest in
Speaker 1: social media. Are your parents on the phone too much?
Speaker 1: I feel like my dad always says I'm on the
Speaker 1: phone too much, but kind of every time I look
Speaker 1: at him, he's always on like slack or something. I
Speaker 1: just went on, Get off your phone, dad, get it
Speaker 1: off your chest. This is your chance to tell us off.
Speaker 1: Go to that camera and just tell him. What's up?
Speaker 1: Get off your phone, Dad, and you to maintain a
Speaker 1: better Wilkelefe balance. You heard him. Parents, stop watching this
Speaker 1: on your phone and go hang out with your kids.
Speaker 1: All right, stay too, because when we come back, the
Speaker 1: one and only Jannis unto the Kumko will be joining me. Well,
Speaker 1: Daily Truco, don't go away. Welcome back to the Daily Show.
Speaker 1: My guest tonight is an NBA Champion Defensive Player of
Speaker 1: the Year in two time League MVP, but you may
Speaker 1: know him as the Greek Freak. Please give it up
Speaker 1: for Yannis. Nice look at that. What is is this coffee?
Speaker 1: It was a little bit, a little bit of coffee
Speaker 1: or water or something like that. How you doing man,
Speaker 1: Thanks for coming to New York. Thank you, Thank you
Speaker 1: for having me. Now I should be calling you head coach.
Speaker 1: You coached me and the Yeah I'm the coach. Yeah yeah,
Speaker 1: but you had like zero points. Yeah, but your defense,
Speaker 1: your energy was great, Like you had a great teammate.
Speaker 1: That's what people tell me all the time. But that
Speaker 1: didn't really translate to online props. I got roasted bad. Look,
Speaker 1: I just think in the future we got to divide
Speaker 1: it up. We got pro athletes over here and then
Speaker 1: civilians because we got DK calf sledge hamming on people.
Speaker 1: That's my guy. I mean, he's great, but I'm thirty
Speaker 1: seven year old Indian man and we're all with each other. Listen, man,
Speaker 1: how's the NEI feeling? I got to ask you. That
Speaker 1: feels good? It feels good. Okay, Okay, so you're gonna recover.
Speaker 1: We're good. I feel no pain. I'm good man. So yeah,
Speaker 1: so look, we're here. We're here in New York because
Speaker 1: we're obviously here to talk about an amazing foundation that
Speaker 1: you have, and one of the things you are so
Speaker 1: proud to share with the world is how much you
Speaker 1: love your family. Yeah. I don't know if you know
Speaker 1: this about Yannis, but I kind of find it annoying
Speaker 1: at times. You're always like, my name is Jannie. I
Speaker 1: love my family. I love my brothers, and then my
Speaker 1: family gets mad at me and they're like, why don't
Speaker 1: you talk about us this way? And I'm like, he's
Speaker 1: hiding something. That's That's what a person with the secret does.
Speaker 1: I wouldn't be hit, I wouldn't be in supposed that
Speaker 1: I've seated today without my family, you know, without the
Speaker 1: sacrifices that without the sacrifice that my parents made every
Speaker 1: single day to provide for us, to put us in
Speaker 1: a position to have an opportunity to go out there
Speaker 1: and accomplish our dreams and goals in life. You know,
Speaker 1: I wouldn't be here without them, you know. Obviously it's
Speaker 1: been six years and now two seventeen six years that
Speaker 1: my dad had passed away, and it's um you know,
Speaker 1: in honor of him. And as I've said in the past,
Speaker 1: and I've said a lot of times, like he had
Speaker 1: no money, he had, he was poor. He came from
Speaker 1: Nigeria to have a better life, and we were his legacy,
Speaker 1: you know. And I could feel like growing up like
Speaker 1: he was the richest person in the neighborhood because he
Speaker 1: always felt rich because he had us, you know. And
Speaker 1: so you know, we decided us, we decided us a
Speaker 1: family to come together and you know, build this foundation
Speaker 1: to basically just do what people did for us, you know,
Speaker 1: just pull our hand out there and give him opportunity
Speaker 1: to be great whatever they decide to do, and kind
Speaker 1: of help them be the step for them to go
Speaker 1: out did and us the same way I did, you know,
Speaker 1: And it's a beautiful thing. Man. It's the Charles Charles
Speaker 1: Onto Takumpo Family Foundation. And what's so cool about it
Speaker 1: is you're focusing on three different places Milwaukee, Nigeria, in Greece,
Speaker 1: which is such an integral part of your identity now
Speaker 1: as a child of immigrants here an immigrant. Is it
Speaker 1: weird being here in America and then being around people
Speaker 1: who don't love their family? You know what I mean
Speaker 1: when people are like, my mom is toxic? Like is
Speaker 1: that weird? Yeah? You know, kind of mean, Like when
Speaker 1: you see mom sell on your phone, you pick it up, right,
Speaker 1: I have to, That's what I'm saying. But people think
Speaker 1: we're crazy. I'm like, I'm there's no way this is
Speaker 1: going four rings? Are you crazy? You have to pick
Speaker 1: it out? Yeah, that's why. Yes, you say you're thirty seven,
Speaker 1: I'm thirty seven. The last time your mom whoop you
Speaker 1: as like thirty five. Yeah. So we'll see emotionally with
Speaker 1: my ass this morning, She's like, oh, you're not gonna
Speaker 1: call me before your first day at the Daily Show.
Speaker 1: I'm like, I'm busy. Yeah No. She suplexes me emotionally
Speaker 1: all the time, but I gotta I gotta take it
Speaker 1: me too, but I'm going to pick up the phone,
Speaker 1: you know. But at the end of the day, like
Speaker 1: as a you know, it's not the relationship are the best,
Speaker 1: you know, but then you just got to make it work.
Speaker 1: But for me, it's easy. With my brothers, we slept
Speaker 1: in the same bed, you know, like I was, I
Speaker 1: had the feet on my face, you know, I had
Speaker 1: this So no, you guys don't know that, like when
Speaker 1: you go back to the motherland sometimes you gotta do
Speaker 1: head to toe toe to hey, yeah, yeah, you like
Speaker 1: it's like reverse Lego logs here. So we were very close.
Speaker 1: We tried to protect one another as much as we
Speaker 1: can and tried to advise one another. And that's how
Speaker 1: my dad raised us. My dad, let's and my mom,
Speaker 1: My mom and dad. You know, if one don't need
Speaker 1: nobody's if like he not me because I'm the third one,
Speaker 1: but like Fantasia's backstage, like he had the most pressured
Speaker 1: out all of us, because like my dad was on him,
Speaker 1: like protect your brothers, like look after your brothers, you know,
Speaker 1: make sure your brothers get to school, make sure that
Speaker 1: your brothers did be Like we were raised to be together.
Speaker 1: So that's why our family has been this way, but
Speaker 1: you know, there's a lot of times that you know,
Speaker 1: sometimes it gets gets crazy, but just have face. You
Speaker 1: have five brothers, Bro, that's nuts. And I was roasting
Speaker 1: you the other day and my brother died in your face.
Speaker 1: I know, I know because I was telling we were
Speaker 1: playing horse back and forth and I can't beat him physically, obviously,
Speaker 1: but I was like, I gotta I gotta defeat them mentally.
Speaker 1: So we're playing horse and in the middle of the game,
Speaker 1: you're shooting a free throw and I'm like, what's it
Speaker 1: like being the middle child? That means you're the least
Speaker 1: loved by your mom. And I did my research. I'm like,
Speaker 1: you know who your mom loves the most, Alex and
Speaker 1: you were like plank. I'm like, let's go. It's crazy
Speaker 1: that that's true. It's crazy. See this is what this
Speaker 1: is what people love about you, Yannis. You love your family,
Speaker 1: You have humility. I'm talking smack to your face and
Speaker 1: you're like, it's cool. Then. I don't know if you've
Speaker 1: seen this about Yannie. There is the groundbreaking tweet you
Speaker 1: had in twenty fourteen and you talk about your love
Speaker 1: of sweets. You love American sweets, let's talk about the smoothie. Oh, yes,
Speaker 1: you go. I just taste for the first time a smoothie.
Speaker 1: God bless America. All right, I was so excited. It's crazy.
Speaker 1: And since then you may have not seen this, but
Speaker 1: like I think it was a recent press conference. You're like,
Speaker 1: I didn't know you could dunk oreos and milk. This
Speaker 1: is crazy. Like, so, you're just enjoying all of these
Speaker 1: American sugary sweets. But I wanted to to open up
Speaker 1: your world a little bit, and I wanted to introduce
Speaker 1: you to more sweets because there's nothing more American than
Speaker 1: diabetes and early onset obesity. So you obviously talk about Skittles.
Speaker 1: Skittles is your candy of choice this year. I saw
Speaker 1: that on IG Obviously you love smoothies. We've talked about
Speaker 1: the dunking the oreo situation. Um, have you had these?
Speaker 1: This is a fruit roll up. No, I'll be Gabe tomorrow. Man,
Speaker 1: Come come on, let's go. We gotta do it right
Speaker 1: here on TV. I need your takee play, we need
Speaker 1: the Jannis tastes. I have a buyer. No, no no, there's
Speaker 1: a rapper. There's rapper, the rapper. Let's go here. We
Speaker 1: go thoughts it is good? Yeah, yeah, let me let
Speaker 1: me get the odd one sum yeah, all right, here
Speaker 1: we go ticks later, yeah, all right, all right? Hellok.
Speaker 1: Growing up as a Muslim, I could not have these,
Speaker 1: but I brought them for you. This is a Hostess snowball,
Speaker 1: and I've always wanted to eat one of these, but
Speaker 1: they have pork gelatin in them, and so I brought
Speaker 1: them here for you so you could eat the devil's candy.
Speaker 1: Tell me what you think. I'm just gonna live vicariously
Speaker 1: through you. No, no, no, so I'm not missing out anything. Okay, no,
Speaker 1: d you know what year they made that, well, nineteen
Speaker 1: eighty one. These things can survive the zombie apocalypse. This,
Speaker 1: this is gonna be honest with you. Let me ask
Speaker 1: you a question. What's your what's your serial of choice?
Speaker 1: Fruit loops or um the cinnamon toast? We know as
Speaker 1: a as an NBA vet, that's kind of a rookie choice.
Speaker 1: Be honest. Have you had the time? Is now? I'm
Speaker 1: gonna undesk this right now. We did some builk. We
Speaker 1: need their ball. No, I just want, I just want
Speaker 1: straight up if you do you like Reese's pieces? Do
Speaker 1: you like Reese's peanut butter. Let's talk about the one. Yeah,
Speaker 1: of course, yeah, what else would I be referring to couple?
Speaker 1: Let me see it. Go for it, police, just straight
Speaker 1: up thoughts it was good? Do you now imagaine this
Speaker 1: with milk? Do you rank it? Do you rank it
Speaker 1: up there with your top two? Yes? I like, okay,
Speaker 1: all right, keep it? Do you keep that? You keep that?
Speaker 1: That's all you. That's all you, bro. I told you.
Speaker 1: I told you, if you come to the show, I'll
Speaker 1: hook you up. You didn't think it was gonna be
Speaker 1: like this. Look, I got to do something for the culture.
Speaker 1: I'm hosting the show, and I can't just be giving
Speaker 1: you these American products. I gotta blow your brain up.
Speaker 1: I didn't say that, right. I didn't say that right,
Speaker 1: I gotta blow your b I didn't say that. I
Speaker 1: didn't say I did. I didn't say that, right. I
Speaker 1: didn't say that. You got what if I got nervous
Speaker 1: and be like, I gotta blow your back out, I'm
Speaker 1: gonna blow your mind right now, Yannis, This right here,
Speaker 1: don't you know what I mean? I didn't forget that.
Speaker 1: This right here is a personal delicacy on behalf of
Speaker 1: all of South Asia. This right here, Yannis, is what
Speaker 1: we call a glob Johmen. And what do you like donuts? Yes? Now,
Speaker 1: imagine who doing mac donuts? Everybody loves don us. Imagine
Speaker 1: if you took a donut hole and you were like,
Speaker 1: go harder in the paint. Let's take that donut hole
Speaker 1: and doubts it in syrup. That, my friend, is a
Speaker 1: glob Johan. Here you go. You made these? I didn't
Speaker 1: make this is gonna I get lie to you. Here
Speaker 1: we go, let me see man. Yeah, this is a
Speaker 1: historical moment. Yeah, I like this. Yeah, what do your mond? Yeah?
Speaker 1: Keep going, you can keep going keeping you can have both?
Speaker 1: Do you want to have all three? I didn't do
Speaker 1: anything to have this is This is an MJ with
Speaker 1: the pizza and the last dance. This is all. This
Speaker 1: is actually from love. I want you to succeed. Let's go, man,
Speaker 1: is that probably the best tasting thing that you had
Speaker 1: out of all of them? It is very rich that
Speaker 1: it's a lot. It's a lot. And if you've noticed,
Speaker 1: if you've seen Indian men in their forties, fifties and sixties,
Speaker 1: and they're kind of shaped like et it's because of
Speaker 1: stuff like that. I got one last thing to talk
Speaker 1: to you about. Can we clear this real quick? Can
Speaker 1: you do this for me? We're gonna clear this real quick.
Speaker 1: One of the things I love about you, man, and
Speaker 1: the reason why I wanted to bring on the show
Speaker 1: to plug the foundation, is your humility. You know, you
Speaker 1: are obviously one of the biggest superstars in the world,
Speaker 1: but you're kind, You're empathetic, You're humble in a league
Speaker 1: where that's not incentivized. But I gotta be honest with you.
Speaker 1: You were in a press conference recently and they asked you.
Speaker 1: You're a two time MVP, and they asked you, who's
Speaker 1: the best player in the league? And this is what
Speaker 1: you said, Let's play the tap. Do I believe I'm
Speaker 1: the best player in the world. No, the best plait
Speaker 1: in the world is Stiff Kittie. It's so the next player.
Speaker 1: I hate that. I hate that you look you got
Speaker 1: this immigrant dad, green card, visa energy, But you're a citizen, bro.
Speaker 1: You deserve to be here, all right. And this whole
Speaker 1: being nice to everybody else in the league, Jannis, they're
Speaker 1: going head hunting for you. You think those guys want
Speaker 1: to be nice to you. I don't think so. No,
Speaker 1: So you gotta talk that talk right here right now
Speaker 1: in New York City. Now, I know talking trash isn't
Speaker 1: your strength. That's my strength. So I wrote you some
Speaker 1: trash talk right here to some of the top players
Speaker 1: in the league. And I want you to go to
Speaker 1: camera three right now, talk that mother talk. Let's go.
Speaker 1: Let's go head hunting, Yana. Okay, there we go. Listen, Luca. Yeah,
Speaker 1: even though you're riding mccari and you have them on
Speaker 1: your team, I'm coming for you, guys. Oh, I can't
Speaker 1: say I can't see the people what they want. Ya.
Speaker 1: Let's do this. Let's do this. I'll do it. I'll
Speaker 1: be your shiptop translator. Let's do this. Get it on me,
Speaker 1: let's go. Yeah, what's up, Luca. Even though you're running
Speaker 1: with Kyrie, the scouting report is out on you. You
Speaker 1: got sausage arms and cankles, my man. For a dude
Speaker 1: from Slovenia, you sure look like a dude from Alabama,
Speaker 1: and you're gonna get this work in the postseason. That's
Speaker 1: what you gotta say. All right, all right, fine, fine, fine,
Speaker 1: He likes Luca, He respects his game. Well about joking
Speaker 1: we got to talk about Joker. I wrote some stuff
Speaker 1: about Joker home right here, here you go. This is
Speaker 1: Jannis given joking that trash top Joker. How are you
Speaker 1: gonna make it through the finals where you look like
Speaker 1: you can barely make it through a Burger king drive through?
Speaker 1: So let's up. This is what we want. This is America. Yes,
Speaker 1: keep going your kids. I love your game. No, it's
Speaker 1: like this go back prompter. Hey, yo, kick Joker, how
Speaker 1: are you gonna make it through the finals when you
Speaker 1: look like you can barely make it through a Burger
Speaker 1: king drive through? You shouldn't be on the court. You
Speaker 1: should be checking ideas outside of a hookah bar. You
Speaker 1: gotta say it like that. All right, let's keep going.
Speaker 1: Let's keep giving these people this work. Kevin Durant, let's go.
Speaker 1: You keep joining super teams to win the NBA title.
Speaker 1: How about how about we work out together sometimes so
Speaker 1: I can teach you how to carry your own team.
Speaker 1: Oh you know what I'm saying? Like, I like that
Speaker 1: one and it was like a little simpler K D
Speaker 1: K one of the best scoring twitter play this game.
Speaker 1: I respect your day. You know you fleet by example
Speaker 1: for fifteen years, So you would hate this. You're growing.
Speaker 1: I hate this. Entertain me. I respect your game. I'm sorry,
Speaker 1: I do the Lebron one. We're gonna get out of here,
Speaker 1: but make this one count Lebron. I love your game, man,
Speaker 1: what is this? I love your game. You're the king
Speaker 1: for the reason. Goat just broke the old time scoring
Speaker 1: a record. Keep doing what you're doing. Man, he's a blueprint.
Speaker 1: You're a blueprint man. All right, all right, listen, listen man,
Speaker 1: everybody we talked about in the NBA, please don't come
Speaker 1: kill me. Janna. This is what we love most about you. Man.
Speaker 1: In all seriousness, thank you so much for the work
Speaker 1: that you're doing in the league. You're setting such a
Speaker 1: great image for kids around the world. I'm so honored
Speaker 1: that I've gotten a chance to get to know you,
Speaker 1: and I can't wait to see all the amazing working
Speaker 1: inter and do for the Charles onto the Kumpo friend,
Speaker 1: New Tuniday for brother, Thank you for most much, Chaste,
Speaker 1: Thank you so much, jannas the food bow everybody, Okay,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna take a quick brisk but will be right back.
Speaker 1: Half of her. That's our show for tonight. But before
Speaker 1: we go to learn more or support the Charles Onto
Speaker 1: the Koumpo found a please head to the link below.
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Speaker 1: searching The Daily Show wherever you get your podcasts. Watch
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