Speaker 1: Inquiring minds want to know how many kids? It's too
Speaker 1: many goddamn kids. Mhm. Is there an answer to that one?
Speaker 1: It's like I'm just good at that one. Clearly it's
Speaker 1: not one. If you're all about to tune into this
Speaker 1: episode with me and my girl dead Ass, Hey, I'm
Speaker 1: Cadine and we're the ellis Is. You may know us
Speaker 1: from posting funny videos with our boys and reading each
Speaker 1: other publicly as a form of therapy. Wait, I'll make
Speaker 1: you need derby most days. Wow. And one more important
Speaker 1: thing to mention, we're married. We are. We created this
Speaker 1: podcast to open dialogue about some of life's most taboo topics,
Speaker 1: things most folks don't want to talk about through the
Speaker 1: lens of a millennial married couple. Dead As is the
Speaker 1: term that we say every day. So when we say
Speaker 1: dead ass, we're actually saying facts, the truth, the whole truth,
Speaker 1: and nothing but the truth. Were about to think, Philo
Speaker 1: talk to a whole new level. Dead Ass starts right now.
Speaker 1: I feel like we all have our friends that we
Speaker 1: go to in a time of triumph, in a time
Speaker 1: of despair, and everything in between. You know, So I'll
Speaker 1: never forget this day or actually it was a couple
Speaker 1: of consecutive days where it's like, you know, you have
Speaker 1: your friend, haven't spoke to them in a minute, that
Speaker 1: you start playing this very intense game of phone tag
Speaker 1: and you're going back and forth, and I'm just like, man,
Speaker 1: I just can't get in touch with my girl Bianca
Speaker 1: because she called me, I called her. We're just playing
Speaker 1: this game, right. So finally I get ahold of Bianca
Speaker 1: and she says to me, girl, guess what she hit
Speaker 1: me with the girl right, guess what? So I'm just like,
Speaker 1: what's going wrong, girl, it's been a minute, haven't spoken
Speaker 1: to him? And she said, girl, you will never guess
Speaker 1: I am regnant. So at that point in time, there's
Speaker 1: so many different reactions that I could have had, right.
Speaker 1: I could have been like, oh my god, girl, you're pregnant,
Speaker 1: like yeah, or it could have been like oh, because
Speaker 1: I know that's not what you really wanted. But this
Speaker 1: one in particular, throw me for a whole loop. And
Speaker 1: I'll tell you why. I said, Okay, sis by who?
Speaker 1: By who? And the reason I asked that is because
Speaker 1: I know, to my knowledge that her husband had a vasectomy.
Speaker 1: He got the snippit eas the bulls were smashed, right, So,
Speaker 1: as far as I know, or I didn't know who
Speaker 1: baby is this, Biancle because it clearly can't be your husband's.
Speaker 1: So I thought she was dropping like the entire teapot
Speaker 1: on my head, right, So I'm like, all right, So
Speaker 1: she's like, fool, it's it's keep's baby. Clearly get me
Speaker 1: killed down here in the street. It's clearly kids baby. However, um,
Speaker 1: I'm eighteen weeks. I was like, what eighteen weeks? So
Speaker 1: not only is she pregnant for her husband who had
Speaker 1: a sect, to me, she's eighteen weeks pregnant, now for
Speaker 1: me as a woman who's pregnant with my fourth. I
Speaker 1: knew I was pregnant by like week six because my
Speaker 1: body just like I just know what it is. But
Speaker 1: with Bianca, I'm like, girl, you didn't know that you
Speaker 1: were eighteen weeks pregnant until you were eighteen weeks. Eighteen
Speaker 1: weeks pregnant, did not know I was still getting a period.
Speaker 1: I was still getting period, but it was like kind
Speaker 1: of funny, right, So she was like, girl, I think
Speaker 1: I thought I was going through menopause. I was getting
Speaker 1: like all these different flashes, you know, I had really bad.
Speaker 1: What I thought was gas. Meanwhile, it was the whole
Speaker 1: baby moving inside of her that wasn't gas. Bianca um
Speaker 1: so I was completely thrown for an entire loop. Bianca
Speaker 1: thought she was going through menopause. You were actually about
Speaker 1: to go get light bo done. I was getting ready
Speaker 1: to go get lightbo section. I didn't care, don't care.
Speaker 1: She had four kids already, so I'm like, I'm all
Speaker 1: for it. If you need a little nip, a little tuck,
Speaker 1: a little suction after four kids, by all means do
Speaker 1: what you gotta do this. And it was in your
Speaker 1: pre surgery blood work that you found out you were pregnant.
Speaker 1: So for further confirmation you had to shooting over to
Speaker 1: the O G Y and just to see, like, just
Speaker 1: scam my belly real quick and see if any baby
Speaker 1: pops up in there, because it could still be gas.
Speaker 1: I'm praying that is gas. At this point. It's not gas, guys,
Speaker 1: it's a whole baby, a whole baby, A whole baby
Speaker 1: developed up in here. I didn't even know. I was like,
Speaker 1: what what? So, come to find out, your boy Keith
Speaker 1: did not go back and get the check that he
Speaker 1: was supposed to get. So obviously, I think you're supposed to,
Speaker 1: like wait for three months, all this extra you have
Speaker 1: to He did not do his job. He knew it
Speaker 1: was job. Had a whole baby, and here we are
Speaker 1: with a whole baby, and she's beautiful and baby number
Speaker 1: five for Bianca, that was story time. You. Oh, we're
Speaker 1: gonna unpack a little bit more with story time when
Speaker 1: we come back. Okay, if we're gonna pack it after this,
Speaker 1: I don't know what I'd ever do with that. You
Speaker 1: from the beginning to the end, you always been here
Speaker 1: right beside me. So I call you my best friend
Speaker 1: through the good times and the bad. One brother, I
Speaker 1: lose if I win, So I call you my best friend.
Speaker 1: Bianca and I have known each other for a minute.
Speaker 1: It's been a minute, and I figured, you know, devoted
Speaker 1: his guy's episode and whatnot. So for my girl's episode
Speaker 1: I really needed, especially as I'm about to have another daby,
Speaker 1: I needed a session where I can just like kickback,
Speaker 1: we can have some girl talk. I'm new to the
Speaker 1: Atlanta area. Bianca's been here for a minute now, about
Speaker 1: seven years years, but she and I actually met years
Speaker 1: ago in Detroit when her husband and my husband were
Speaker 1: playing together on the Detroit Lions. So that's been how
Speaker 1: many years now, that's like, what fifteen years? About that
Speaker 1: makes sense. I always gauge it based off your first daughter,
Speaker 1: my girl Gianna, because she's sixtet now, so and I
Speaker 1: met you, but she was like about it. But two
Speaker 1: years maybe justin ready to turn too. So this has
Speaker 1: been a friendship in the making for a long time.
Speaker 1: And um we have literally been through so many different
Speaker 1: phases of life together now having nine kids, nine kids
Speaker 1: in between us, well eight, I am on the way
Speaker 1: to nine. We're counting, We're counting. We're going to count
Speaker 1: baby Bore ready, We're gonna count him. I'm so sure
Speaker 1: that it's going to turn into ten kids in between us. Guys,
Speaker 1: you see what she's trying to do. You see what
Speaker 1: she's trying to do. Misery loves company, right. I told
Speaker 1: you that that five kid club, that that membership fees
Speaker 1: too too expensive for me. I can't, I can't. So um, so, Bianca,
Speaker 1: just say hello to the dead ask community, tell them,
Speaker 1: tell them hello, introduce yourself, let them know a little
Speaker 1: bit about yourself, what you do running all these businesses,
Speaker 1: being a boss, mom and wife. Okay, So my name
Speaker 1: is Bianca. Of course, I have five kids. I'm married
Speaker 1: to my husband Keith, four girls, one boy. We own
Speaker 1: businesses together. We do youth sports league and I Sports
Speaker 1: and Douglasville, viette Ville and Coweda County I hope, I'll
Speaker 1: say Coweda right, um. And then also rehab real estate.
Speaker 1: So that's what we're doing thus far. She's always doing
Speaker 1: all the things which I absolutely love about you and
Speaker 1: admire about you, I must say, because Bianca be getting
Speaker 1: it in. So let's go back to storytime real quick,
Speaker 1: because that was just that was the funniest phone call,
Speaker 1: and it's something that only you and I feel I
Speaker 1: could laugh about because let's be, let's face it, another baby,
Speaker 1: another blessing. It's all good. But what do you think
Speaker 1: went wrong with the whole scenario if we had to
Speaker 1: say something quote unquote wrong. Of course, you weren't expecting
Speaker 1: to have another baby because you were done. Your youngest
Speaker 1: at the point was how old? Eight? Maybe my youngest, yeah,
Speaker 1: was eight? Was eight? Eight years old? Right? And we
Speaker 1: had had a previous conversation where you had said to me,
Speaker 1: you know the benefit of having kids young is that
Speaker 1: you have them young and by the time they're out
Speaker 1: the house, you still have like your entire forties, fifties,
Speaker 1: sixties to just live it up, to regain yourself, to
Speaker 1: do all the things, and then you've got it over.
Speaker 1: I don't know what happens. Okay, so that occurred, But
Speaker 1: you know what, the good point about it is that
Speaker 1: I do have older kids, so now they're they're very helpful,
Speaker 1: or let's say they were very helpful because now that
Speaker 1: she can walk and talk and she has her own
Speaker 1: little personality, they're like, Mom, come get your kids to
Speaker 1: the built in babysitters you had you don't really have anymore.
Speaker 1: So what did it feel like for you and your
Speaker 1: husband when you found out that you were pregnant after
Speaker 1: a vasectomy? So technically it's the thing that they can't
Speaker 1: guarantee a d percent that the vasectomy will will completely
Speaker 1: rid you of the possibility of it. They cannot guarantee it.
Speaker 1: They give you a piece of paper that you sign
Speaker 1: at the beginning of the procedure and it does say
Speaker 1: that it has like a certain percentage of it does work.
Speaker 1: But the point is Keith Smith Jr. Back into the
Speaker 1: doctor's office and they're supposed to check and make sure
Speaker 1: he did not go back guys, and he did not
Speaker 1: tell us information. So from what I understand, you're supposed
Speaker 1: to have like a whole lot of sex after. You're
Speaker 1: supposed to have a whole lot of sex after. From
Speaker 1: my That's what I'm being told, right, or a whole
Speaker 1: lot of ejaculation. So it's not necessarily have tag, you know,
Speaker 1: to get it out, to get out the active sperm.
Speaker 1: But there Brille was active. She was highly active as
Speaker 1: we can tell. And she's run around like a little
Speaker 1: bull of fire. That little scorpio baby actually makes me
Speaker 1: decided to have a scorpio baby too, because Brielle, I'm
Speaker 1: gonna pick them up together. They can have a field day.
Speaker 1: They can have a field day. Brille is on another level. Scorpios.
Speaker 1: I got to say, I don't know much about them,
Speaker 1: but I will get to know them very soon. Um.
Speaker 1: So there's a discussion sometimes about people always just naturally
Speaker 1: being in people's uterus, right, being in your uterus, wanting
Speaker 1: to know like all the plans you have. You know,
Speaker 1: you have one baby, it's like when's the next one.
Speaker 1: You have another baby, it's like when's the next one.
Speaker 1: Then you have like me three of the same time,
Speaker 1: and it's like, are you going for the girl? And
Speaker 1: now being pregnant with my fourth boy, I'm still getting
Speaker 1: the question, so are you going to try for the
Speaker 1: girl again or are you going to go for the
Speaker 1: fifth one? And I'm just like, at one point do
Speaker 1: people just say, you know what, let me just shut
Speaker 1: my mouth and just ride whatever way these people are
Speaker 1: on because they're doing their thing. How many they don't
Speaker 1: every day don't. I mean even my mother she like
Speaker 1: when we went to Mexico, she has the kids, she
Speaker 1: has the grandkids, and she's like, oh my gosh, you
Speaker 1: should totally have a sixth one so Brielle can have
Speaker 1: a playmate. I'm like, it's like, when does it ever end? Mom?
Speaker 1: When does it only have one? And now you have
Speaker 1: me having all these kids. No. Absolutely, you live in Michigan, ma'am. Please,
Speaker 1: Mom's gonna have to come down here and keep me company.
Speaker 1: The two of them can actually get together and be together. Um,
Speaker 1: but yeah, at what point do you feel like, how
Speaker 1: how many kids are too many kids? How many kids
Speaker 1: are too many kids? That's my question. That's my question too,
Speaker 1: because um, literally I have like with the five it's
Speaker 1: it's not. I feel like once you have three, after three,
Speaker 1: you can manage any amount of kids because my house
Speaker 1: is like the kid spot. Everybody drops their kids off
Speaker 1: in my house and when they're there, I don't notice
Speaker 1: any anything. So I can say so, whether it's five
Speaker 1: or whether it's nine or nine or ten, once you
Speaker 1: get past three, you can handle anything. I remember you
Speaker 1: telling me that too. You did say that, so, so
Speaker 1: I think it's safe to say. You know, you have
Speaker 1: one child, Okay, that's like two parents on one. If
Speaker 1: you have like you know, a traditional household and then
Speaker 1: you have too, it's like, okay, there's that. You know,
Speaker 1: I forget what it is it man to man coverage
Speaker 1: one one ratio, and then you have three in and
Speaker 1: now it's just like chaos, chaos. Right after that, it's
Speaker 1: just like anything goes right, anything goes used to it. Well,
Speaker 1: let's see what stats we have here, you know, because
Speaker 1: I asked my good my good girl triple to pull
Speaker 1: up some stats for me, and let's see what is
Speaker 1: the consensus, right, because I feel like back in the day,
Speaker 1: when you look at our grandmothers, they were having like
Speaker 1: like what else were all doing back in the day
Speaker 1: other than getting it in. So um, overall, women have
Speaker 1: two point zero seven children during their lives on average,
Speaker 1: up from one point eight six in two thousand and six,
Speaker 1: the lowest number on record. Interesting, so it seems like
Speaker 1: most people are having two children. What's just here to say?
Speaker 1: What's the point seven about? It could be a pet,
Speaker 1: you know, a fish, something like that. The median age
Speaker 1: at which women are becoming mothers in the US is
Speaker 1: twenty six compared to twenty three, and so I do
Speaker 1: feel like there's also a wave of women waiting later
Speaker 1: to have kids. So you had told me early on
Speaker 1: that you actually preferred having children younger because you felt like, well,
Speaker 1: what was your reasoning? You tell me, Okay, one, I
Speaker 1: you had your first child at what age? I had
Speaker 1: my first child at twenty two, So twenty two, so
Speaker 1: it went and I was like that strategic it was?
Speaker 1: It wasn't It wasn't. It's just like I ended up
Speaker 1: getting pregnant like every two months. Um, I don't know.
Speaker 1: I feel like it's them close together and younger. I
Speaker 1: can definitely tell the difference because now with Brielle, I
Speaker 1: was a geriatric pregnancy. They just kept on saying, oh,
Speaker 1: geriatric pregnancy, your geriatric geriac after me, after this pregnancy,
Speaker 1: we're not using that no more. Ever, so younger, I
Speaker 1: noticed I had way more energy with the kids, like
Speaker 1: it was just like more patients, more energy, more everything.
Speaker 1: And then now with I can tell the total difference
Speaker 1: with Brielle because I am like, okay, I need a break,
Speaker 1: can't go running up and down the stairs with you,
Speaker 1: just like, come on, girl, let's let's calm down. And
Speaker 1: I don't know if it's working opposite for me, because
Speaker 1: I know a lot of people that have waited until
Speaker 1: their thirties to have their children, But me, I'm like,
Speaker 1: I wanted to have them young, get them out of
Speaker 1: the way, and then spread your wings and fly. I'm like, okay,
Speaker 1: and then Rial came along and snap the wings through
Speaker 1: the wrench. Then well yeah, I think that's the thing
Speaker 1: um where I didn't see the benefit of having Jackson
Speaker 1: at twenty seven. But at the same time, too, I
Speaker 1: feel like I'm able to afford my children more opportunity
Speaker 1: now that I'm having kids a little bit older. Because
Speaker 1: you're figured in your early twenties, a lot of times
Speaker 1: you're still trying to figure things out, right, So there's
Speaker 1: that process of trying to figure out careers or trying
Speaker 1: to build money, and people ask like, when's the right
Speaker 1: time to have a kid, and I'm always like, there's
Speaker 1: never really at right time, Like how you ever really
Speaker 1: felt prepared for a kid, no matter how particularly your
Speaker 1: first one. It's like something that happens that gets you
Speaker 1: off balance or unprepared to handle what's coming next. It's
Speaker 1: like ever changing. So it doesn't really make a difference
Speaker 1: about the age. I feel like your finances have to
Speaker 1: be in order. Luckily my finances were orders okay, But
Speaker 1: um with that, I mean, you just have to make
Speaker 1: sure that you're ready to have kids because you are
Speaker 1: not going to be the same person as you were
Speaker 1: before kids. And then your mate and your significant other
Speaker 1: have to take that into consideration too, because of course
Speaker 1: when we're younger, younger of course, younger guys, younger girls,
Speaker 1: we don't think the same in our thirties as we
Speaker 1: do in our twenties. But you don't think the same
Speaker 1: as a mother as you do when you're not. So
Speaker 1: that changed the mothering part change, Like it was just like, oh,
Speaker 1: I'm responsible for this little life and I'm the person
Speaker 1: that has to stop up to the plate and what
Speaker 1: if something happens, it's my fault, Like it's that there's
Speaker 1: like no point of return. We've spoken on the episode
Speaker 1: a prior episode, and I've mentioned about um someone who
Speaker 1: I spoke to recently that was just like, you know, UM,
Speaker 1: as much as I love my children, I really would
Speaker 1: have rethought if I even wanted to be a mother
Speaker 1: to begin with, because it's just a lot. And she said,
Speaker 1: the way her anxiety is set up, she's like I
Speaker 1: saw I mean recently that said motherhood means that you're
Speaker 1: pretty much going to be in a constant state of
Speaker 1: worry for the rest of your life. And I was like,
Speaker 1: that is me a hundred and ten percent, Like I'm
Speaker 1: going to literally be worrying for the rest of my
Speaker 1: life about all these different children. So it's like not
Speaker 1: worrying about one, not to not three, but when you
Speaker 1: let four and five children out into the world, it's
Speaker 1: like that much more intense. You're definitely gonna worry. And
Speaker 1: then the other aspect to it is like you have
Speaker 1: multiple personalities that you're dealing with. That's a whole another
Speaker 1: thing in itself. Personalities that you're dealing with so guess
Speaker 1: what you're basically schizophrenic or bipolar or like you're you're
Speaker 1: trying to help everybody and learn each child because they're
Speaker 1: going to process things differently. They're going to take things
Speaker 1: you might say to them the heart like they're more sensitive,
Speaker 1: they're more responsible, they're like you have to push them,
Speaker 1: like you have to learn your kids to know what
Speaker 1: exactly to do it. And I think that's the biggest
Speaker 1: process that you have to get past because some people
Speaker 1: just say, Okay, I have three kids. Oh I'm parenting
Speaker 1: these three kids the same way, and you can't write.
Speaker 1: It's like you can't do right. And so I told
Speaker 1: you I recently, I said, I feel like we have
Speaker 1: to style step accordingly to each child. And he was like, mmm, yes,
Speaker 1: and no, I think that part of it is style stepping.
Speaker 1: Like you said to say, Okay, I know that this
Speaker 1: particular child can handle this criticism delivered in this manner,
Speaker 1: whereas this child may not be, you know, as right
Speaker 1: what happened. I can tell much of your kids would
Speaker 1: be more dramatic. But then you know you'll have one
Speaker 1: that you have to be a little bit more sensitive
Speaker 1: with the delivery or the approach that you take. So
Speaker 1: he said, you know, I think it's too fold k.
Speaker 1: I think it's a thing where yes, you have to
Speaker 1: style step a bit, but you also kind of have
Speaker 1: a set have to set a precedent as the parent,
Speaker 1: like listening all this is just what it is. This
Speaker 1: is the rule. Like he believes in being very direct
Speaker 1: and blunt in a relationship and also in parenting. So
Speaker 1: I've had to learn that way because I've kind of
Speaker 1: been more of the ones to stout step around the
Speaker 1: kids individuality and like the way they receive things. Like
Speaker 1: I know I could tell Cass something bluntly, actually this
Speaker 1: is cats is, That's that's that's my baby, cats is godmother,
Speaker 1: so Cats I could be like, yo, listen x y Z,
Speaker 1: this is how I was gonna go, and he's gonna pout,
Speaker 1: or he might look at me sideways, such as Sagittarius,
Speaker 1: he might look at me sideways, but at least I
Speaker 1: know I can deliver it to him in that manner
Speaker 1: and be firm, Whereas with Cairo, if I tell him something,
Speaker 1: he almost feels as if, oh my god, I disappointed mom,
Speaker 1: so I'm gonna cry, you know. Or Jackson he just
Speaker 1: thinks he knows everything at ten. I recently told him
Speaker 1: the other day. I was like, listen, if you know
Speaker 1: everything in ten years old, I'm gonna just retire from
Speaker 1: being your mom. How about that? How about that? Why?
Speaker 1: What was his response on that? Listen? He was like, Okay,
Speaker 1: I can't, like literally just little things that I've been
Speaker 1: trying to, like, you know, because you got to coach
Speaker 1: your kids up. You have to teach them little things,
Speaker 1: and you know, I was explaining something to him, and
Speaker 1: he just literally was just so bothered by the fact
Speaker 1: that I even had the audacity to say anything to him.
Speaker 1: So I say, you know what, I'm gonna just retire
Speaker 1: from being your mom since you know everything at ten,
Speaker 1: and that's what am I here for? But that's how
Speaker 1: you feel. But now that Gianna she's sixteen and Giselle
Speaker 1: she just went into high school, so she's a ninth
Speaker 1: grader freshman, and she goes to Giselle. I hear them talking.
Speaker 1: I'm like, let me go spine on these kids, and
Speaker 1: she's like, listen. The thing that I wished that I
Speaker 1: would have did, I wished that I would would have
Speaker 1: listened to mom and been more involved in clubs and sports.
Speaker 1: And stuff in high school because then bam, the pandemic
Speaker 1: happen and she was like starting starting. I was so excited.
Speaker 1: I was like, that was nice. Yes, she usually because
Speaker 1: that would be don't want to stop. See. I actually
Speaker 1: definitely did not start to relate to anything my mother
Speaker 1: said to me at all until I was like in
Speaker 1: my thirties. But the most part as apparent at least
Speaker 1: now that you say that, that was the same thing
Speaker 1: with my mom. And you know, our mother's generated is different,
Speaker 1: like they came from a parent generations like do as
Speaker 1: I say, not as I do. What I say goes,
Speaker 1: that's just it just speak quiet, don't say nothing. And
Speaker 1: with our kids, I feel like I gave them a
Speaker 1: little bit more freedom to kinda oh this is what
Speaker 1: I want to do, and this is what because you
Speaker 1: have kids, right, but you can't. You cannot treat your
Speaker 1: newborn like you treat your tydler. You can't treat your
Speaker 1: tydler like you do your school aged kid and then
Speaker 1: your high school or like, as they progress and evolve,
Speaker 1: you're supposed to evolve as a parent with them. So
Speaker 1: you have to kind of put your feelings to the side.
Speaker 1: Because I know my teenagers. I mean, my teenagers talk
Speaker 1: to me about all kind of stuff, like crazy stuff,
Speaker 1: and I'm like just sitting there, like I'm like getting
Speaker 1: there and I'm a Gemini, so it's on my face
Speaker 1: and I'm just like, you're getting there. Keep your face straight,
Speaker 1: don't make anything, don't make any movements. Don't like judge
Speaker 1: because then they'll shut down. They're like, okay, I don't
Speaker 1: want to. Even so, you feel comfort in the fact
Speaker 1: that your your your high school age children can speak
Speaker 1: to you about count that My mom was like, I
Speaker 1: came up to you, what exactly you like? Who like
Speaker 1: your books? How about that? Right? Do you know your
Speaker 1: math facts? I'm like I like this boy, I like
Speaker 1: that boy or oh this boy said this, and I'm like, okay, right.
Speaker 1: But nowadays I feel like our children are left to
Speaker 1: contend with so much more, and they're exposed to so
Speaker 1: much more than we were back in the day. I mean,
Speaker 1: we were exposed to so but we kind of had
Speaker 1: to dig to find it. You know, you had your
Speaker 1: little friend that was a little fast that your mom
Speaker 1: warned you about, like just don't hang out with her
Speaker 1: because I could tell, like they could tell from early
Speaker 1: who the little fast ones were you know, so that's like, no,
Speaker 1: that's my friend exactly. You defend your friend, but no
Speaker 1: one good. Well you was getting tips and tracks from her,
Speaker 1: like I was exposed to little Kim writing down song
Speaker 1: lyrics from early all sorts of stuff. I forget what
Speaker 1: book it was that I was reading. Everybody was reading
Speaker 1: this book back and the day it was a flag
Speaker 1: girl Girl fla girl, or like sane books and like
Speaker 1: things like that. Like that was like circulating in middle school,
Speaker 1: and I'm like, oh lord, that is the age. As
Speaker 1: my heart starts to palpatate to Jackson middle school and
Speaker 1: middle school. I was just saying about middle school and
Speaker 1: my Okay, these kids in middle school they're doing all
Speaker 1: types of things and and like everything. When I say
Speaker 1: all types of things, I mean they're doing everything. So
Speaker 1: I have to like talk to my son a little
Speaker 1: bit differently than I talked to my girls and say,
Speaker 1: like just straight up, don't be touching this, don't be
Speaker 1: doing this, like girls say this, don't bry and keeps
Speaker 1: looking at you. Remember the other day she was like
Speaker 1: I had to tell them recently, don't let these girls
Speaker 1: touch your pp Don't let them do this. Do not
Speaker 1: touch there anything, because we just don't touch your balls.
Speaker 1: You don't touch this, you don't touch and there, and
Speaker 1: keeps just looking at me like I'm gonna talk to him.
Speaker 1: You just don't worry about that, right right. But with
Speaker 1: our boys to listen, I go, I just I know
Speaker 1: what it is. It's like, I gotta tell you what happened.
Speaker 1: Was not going. We have to girls too. They're just like,
Speaker 1: oh my gosh, Mom, do we have to talk about
Speaker 1: this right now? And I'm like, yeah, we do. That's
Speaker 1: when you pull up pictures of like herpies, all types
Speaker 1: of stuff I was doing, get mono and they're like
Speaker 1: this mono and I'm like, yeah, don't right, I'm some somebody.
Speaker 1: Sometimes you have to put the scare taxes in there
Speaker 1: just so they can have it in the back of
Speaker 1: their mind. If you want to anything, just now to pictures.
Speaker 1: Just remember the pictures. You want to search stuff on
Speaker 1: social media, look up what herpies looks like. There's on
Speaker 1: I'll break they on parenting. Just scare the hell out
Speaker 1: of him and then hug him after. So you touched
Speaker 1: a little bit on this when you were explaining um
Speaker 1: your story with you and your husband mothers, generally with
Speaker 1: each child tend to be reborn in a sense, right,
Speaker 1: we're learning something new, whether it's either about the child,
Speaker 1: we're learning something to about ourselves. Like I feel like
Speaker 1: after Kaz, which was my third birth, I was like, shit,
Speaker 1: I'm superwoman. Like I had a whole motherfucking baby in
Speaker 1: the bathtub. What I was looking at it? And I
Speaker 1: was like there the whole time I was, I was
Speaker 1: breathing with you, girl, all the things. I'm like, why
Speaker 1: am I pushing? Why am I pushing? Nothing to push out? Listen.
Speaker 1: I mean it was a time. So I just learned
Speaker 1: in that in that experience, like wow, like the strength
Speaker 1: that I had, you know, and also just like the
Speaker 1: faith that I had in God in my body to
Speaker 1: do what it was supposed to do, and like also
Speaker 1: just overcoming fear. Like so many things I learned in
Speaker 1: that process. But you also hear moms talk a lot
Speaker 1: about how they tend to lose themselves in the process
Speaker 1: of parenting and becoming a mom. So how do you
Speaker 1: feel like over the course of having children over the
Speaker 1: past couple of years that you've had to kind of
Speaker 1: defer your dreams a bit um or put things on hold,
Speaker 1: how has that kind of manifested or not in your life? Well,
Speaker 1: with that, I mean timing, Like I have a time issue, guys,
Speaker 1: I've had it for a long time. Contain you may
Speaker 1: know back at games, I'll be missing the national anthem,
Speaker 1: I'll be missing playing. I'm like, yeah, we're there. No,
Speaker 1: I was not on time. So and that is a
Speaker 1: big thing for Keith, like he loves to be on time.
Speaker 1: And I feel like with having the kids, that has
Speaker 1: multiple kids has gotten me to the point where I
Speaker 1: have to be aware of the time. I have to
Speaker 1: be aware of the schedule and what's going on because
Speaker 1: with kids, of course you need some kind of stability
Speaker 1: and some kind of scheduling and that kind of thing.
Speaker 1: So with me, the biggest transition was learning how to
Speaker 1: manage my time and being able as a mother to say, hey,
Speaker 1: from this time to this time, I don't care what
Speaker 1: y'all doing as long as the house is not burning
Speaker 1: down and y'all learned dead, don't don't tell me right
Speaker 1: too for me go to your dad because I can
Speaker 1: remember like when they were smaller, and I'm like, just
Speaker 1: in the shower, like that's my time, Like, let me
Speaker 1: just let me, just wash my hair. Okay, guys, that's
Speaker 1: all I want. Can wash as in piece please, that's
Speaker 1: the thing. You can't wash your ass because Cannons had
Speaker 1: probably maybe three and all of a sudden, I feel
Speaker 1: like little fingers and there in my butt crack. I'm
Speaker 1: like opening my eyes, like what the hell is this?
Speaker 1: He's in the shower with me with like mom, and
Speaker 1: I'm like, where's your dad? Right? Where your dad? Watching football? Yeah?
Speaker 1: Time management has definitely become a thing with me too.
Speaker 1: And it's funny because now that we're kind of back
Speaker 1: into a routine where the kids are back in school,
Speaker 1: we're treading lightly. We're starting to slowly put Jackson back
Speaker 1: in sports. It's like, literally, you should see our calendar.
Speaker 1: Aside from just like career stuff with Deval and I,
Speaker 1: we have a joint calendar with our manager, so there's
Speaker 1: like work related things. Then there's like Jackson and his
Speaker 1: slew of activities that are happening several times. So I
Speaker 1: can only imagine as Cairo and cats get into it,
Speaker 1: and then eventually this baby when he's grown up. That's
Speaker 1: kind of where you are now with your kids. Yes,
Speaker 1: the activities. Yeah, oh I'm tired of the activities. Okay,
Speaker 1: because when I was a child, yes, I was in activities,
Speaker 1: but my mom was like, oh, them activities better be
Speaker 1: at school because I'm not driving you all around town.
Speaker 1: But now I found myself literally in the car from
Speaker 1: like six thirty because when I moved down here to Georgia,
Speaker 1: even you know, they start school way too damn mad early,
Speaker 1: way too early early, Like I swear the first six
Speaker 1: months school, they were late like every day to that.
Speaker 1: The lady was like, you're gonna have to tell your
Speaker 1: mom to get you here on time. And I was like,
Speaker 1: tell her to come and help pits in the morning. Yes,
Speaker 1: how about that? Yeah, don't the nerve there should be
Speaker 1: like some sort of like leeway given to which children
Speaker 1: a little like a great spirit period can be a
Speaker 1: great speriod, Like you shouldn't have had so many damn
Speaker 1: kids anyway, that's probably what they didn't up staying to us.
Speaker 1: But your organization, I've realized, like, even if you weren't
Speaker 1: a person who was organized before having multiple children, you're
Speaker 1: gonna an eyes or your life is just gonna be chaotic.
Speaker 1: You know what stresses me out having to figure out
Speaker 1: dinner every night? That is like my biggest stressor when
Speaker 1: it comes to having a family, and not to mention
Speaker 1: my husband who was like social butterfly and always wants
Speaker 1: to have people over by the house. So I'm always
Speaker 1: finding myself like, oh my god, what am I going
Speaker 1: to feed these people plus my children on a random night.
Speaker 1: That's like my biggest like anxiety. I feel like with food,
Speaker 1: I'm really good at food, Like I'm really really beyond
Speaker 1: because Loki is chef, y'all, she could she could go
Speaker 1: down as we sit here with banana put it in
Speaker 1: our face that y'all see the banana putting. M hm, yes, um,
Speaker 1: meals are not a problem. The problem is the same
Speaker 1: thing like I don't know are your kids like I
Speaker 1: don't want to eat that. I eat that yesterday because
Speaker 1: my kids are crazy. They don't eat leftovers. I don't
Speaker 1: know where they got it. Definitely not lucky, thankfully, thankfully devoting.
Speaker 1: The kids are not super picky. Um. But Jackson has
Speaker 1: a bad habit of asking me like in that moment,
Speaker 1: like mom, can I have tacos bound? And I'm like, bro,
Speaker 1: it's it's seven o'clock, it's dinnertime, it's tonight. This is
Speaker 1: what it is, this is this is what we're doing tonight,
Speaker 1: this is what we're doing today. It's hard like that,
Speaker 1: it's hard. And then multiple people and then their taste,
Speaker 1: like it was a point in time where I was
Speaker 1: like the craziest mom on the planet. I was like, Okay,
Speaker 1: this person doesn't like cheese anymore. This person doesn't like
Speaker 1: purple grapes. When did this happen? Like, I'm bringing purple
Speaker 1: grapes on there. We don't eat purple grapes anymore. We
Speaker 1: only eat green grapes. When the hell did you stop
Speaker 1: eating purple grapes? That's literally like kids, they have the season.
Speaker 1: Even my husband. One minute he's eating corn pops and
Speaker 1: the next minute he's out pops no more. Meanwhile, I
Speaker 1: went into Costco and got the whole big box of
Speaker 1: corn pops that's gonna sit there and right now they
Speaker 1: still there. We should start swapping, we should start sending.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna like cereals do you have, because I have
Speaker 1: like a whole big but because they don't want, they
Speaker 1: don't want any more anymore, And you're buying in balk
Speaker 1: and you're like for what you sound like Mimi though,
Speaker 1: because my mom has spoiled my children. I mean, there's
Speaker 1: a benefit of her living with us for sure, because
Speaker 1: she's like great help, but also too, they've gotten used
Speaker 1: to my mom like takes breakfast orders for them. The
Speaker 1: night before, was doing what Mimi was doing, like what
Speaker 1: literally like you want to you want to waffle? She
Speaker 1: was doing omelets? Yeah, I was doing omelets, just getting fancy.
Speaker 1: I was getting off fancy. I was doing, Oh you
Speaker 1: wanted for Tata? I was like, who are you the
Speaker 1: black Martha Stewart calmed down, like just give them a
Speaker 1: bowl of cereal? Like so I had to like pull
Speaker 1: that back a little bit in order to create time
Speaker 1: for myself, right, And that was the big that's the
Speaker 1: biggest thing with mom's We do not have an of
Speaker 1: time for ourselves or we don't take it because we
Speaker 1: feel like mom guilt, like, oh, what are they gonna
Speaker 1: be eating? Oh, Chick fil A some nights, it's gonna
Speaker 1: be Chick fil A, y'all. Sometimes gonna be read today, right,
Speaker 1: all the things. So when it comes to like career,
Speaker 1: for example, with me, my biggest apprehension with knowing Okay,
Speaker 1: for example, after Cats, I wasn't completely done because I
Speaker 1: feel like I've heard at least that most women know
Speaker 1: like internally like I'm done having children. Then you have
Speaker 1: some that are just like, oh well, I'm kind of
Speaker 1: on the fence, like I could do one more or not.
Speaker 1: So that's kind of where I was with cats. I'm
Speaker 1: one of three, devots one of three, so three kind
Speaker 1: of felt like a natural number to me. And I
Speaker 1: got into the swing of having the three children. Um,
Speaker 1: and he's like, I can have six kids if you
Speaker 1: let me, you know what I mean, And he did
Speaker 1: number six, like that's to six kids. When we first
Speaker 1: six kids, I'm like, I don't know, no, no, no,
Speaker 1: believe that's our grandmother's generation. So I said, all right,
Speaker 1: I was on the fence. We had one more, but
Speaker 1: my biggest thing was the woman, of course, carries the baby.
Speaker 1: And then what happens. You have to kind of reset
Speaker 1: and you have to get your body back in order,
Speaker 1: and then you're pregnant for nine almost ten months, and
Speaker 1: then you have that postpartum phase where you're trying to
Speaker 1: get back, you know, to your old self, which takes realistically.
Speaker 1: When my obie told me that it would take probably
Speaker 1: a year after giving birth for me to feel like
Speaker 1: myself again. I was like a year nah, but literally
Speaker 1: it was almost like a year to the date before
Speaker 1: I felt like, wow, like I'm myself again. So for me,
Speaker 1: it was having to be pregnant, having to get back,
Speaker 1: and then putting my career on hold, especially doing on
Speaker 1: camera stuff because you you know, you've dabbled in acting
Speaker 1: and stuff too, and doing on camera work commercials with
Speaker 1: your family, so it's that pressure feeling like, man, if
Speaker 1: I were to go into having a baby again, it's
Speaker 1: literally like putting my life on hold for a year
Speaker 1: and a half to two years and then having to
Speaker 1: restart that career or jump start that career, or if
Speaker 1: you're in the acting world of the television world, it's
Speaker 1: literally having to then you know, be noticed again because
Speaker 1: once the people start to get a buzz about, you
Speaker 1: kind of want to keep that going. So the only
Speaker 1: kind of constantly that I had, particularly doing the work
Speaker 1: that I do now, was thank goodness for social media.
Speaker 1: I'm able to do a lot of my work from
Speaker 1: home and kind of control my schedule and stuff. So
Speaker 1: have you ever had any career moves or opportunities that
Speaker 1: you had to kind of let fall by the wayside
Speaker 1: because you were having to mom, or you were pregnant,
Speaker 1: or you were busy with your family. Yeah, it's definitely
Speaker 1: that um acting modeling kind of situation because that field
Speaker 1: is so fickle. It would get to the point that,
Speaker 1: of course, like our whole family would be called in
Speaker 1: to do things and then they would say like, okay,
Speaker 1: where everything's great? And then I'm like, why are you
Speaker 1: buying not I'm like still emotional because I just had
Speaker 1: a baby, Like why am I not in the picture?
Speaker 1: They just have my hand like, so they were basically like,
Speaker 1: come in, mom, so you can take care of these
Speaker 1: four kids with their dad, because it was before Brio
Speaker 1: was born with their dad and he's going to be
Speaker 1: a single dad at the kitchen table with the cereal
Speaker 1: and the breakfast. Problem with that. I had a problem
Speaker 1: with that because your hand could be well who then
Speaker 1: how keeper's hand? Were they trying to push the narrative
Speaker 1: of the single black dad trying to raise the kid girl?
Speaker 1: Because I couldn't mind me in a shot. Every single
Speaker 1: job that I have booked with the kids and Keith,
Speaker 1: it has been like, okay, man, we're going to have
Speaker 1: you pour this water right here into this pop and
Speaker 1: the country, and then we get the pictures and the
Speaker 1: like why am I in all? Why why did they
Speaker 1: call me? And I'm like in some of the pictures,
Speaker 1: and then like it would just be like my sock,
Speaker 1: I'm like and then the lady was like, look because
Speaker 1: that's at the time when I was like, really, you know, together,
Speaker 1: because I was working out right, like I got back
Speaker 1: together to only show my hand what the hell and
Speaker 1: was off risk have four kids. It just doesn't fit
Speaker 1: show off that skinny ass risk. That's funny because I
Speaker 1: used to go on casting sometimes too, and they'll be like,
Speaker 1: you don't look like you could be a mom with
Speaker 1: two or three kids, and I'm like, but these are
Speaker 1: all my children, though I don't understand. There was one
Speaker 1: point when Deval and I actually took our god children
Speaker 1: on casting with us because they needed us to have
Speaker 1: older children, and they were just like, it just doesn't
Speaker 1: make sense because you're like, you look too too like
Speaker 1: fit and young to have three and four kids. But
Speaker 1: why is there? And that's the and that's the thing too,
Speaker 1: because why is that? Why are you putting us in
Speaker 1: a box? Why do the moms have to be in
Speaker 1: a box like we can be we can look like
Speaker 1: all the things, every single thing what you need us
Speaker 1: to look like, we can do it. That's a fact.
Speaker 1: That's a fact. So how do you how do you
Speaker 1: begin to then like regain yourself after a baby? Like,
Speaker 1: where are some things that you do? So for me,
Speaker 1: I'm very reliant on and and thankful for my village
Speaker 1: that helps, so that way I'm able to kind of
Speaker 1: dive back into work. You know, Mimi's here with us
Speaker 1: full time. So it's great because she's like, whatever did
Speaker 1: you gotta do, go ahead and do it, and then
Speaker 1: we don't have to worry and think about the kids.
Speaker 1: You don't have as much help on hand, So how
Speaker 1: are you able to kind of like regain yourself after
Speaker 1: that and just kind of dive back in don't have
Speaker 1: as much help. The only thing is Keith's mom does
Speaker 1: live here in Georgia, so when we do need things
Speaker 1: or do need to like take a break, go on vacation, whatever,
Speaker 1: we're able to call her. My mom is all in
Speaker 1: the way in Michigan and Loki, She's like, let me
Speaker 1: go to the casino. What watch grandkids are? Know? How
Speaker 1: does any quay to the casino to a grandma? Thanks
Speaker 1: grandma um. So with that, a lot of things have
Speaker 1: been like Keith and I have had to we work together. First,
Speaker 1: we work together, we lived together. We pretty much to
Speaker 1: do everything together. So we've had to come like sit
Speaker 1: down at the table and say, Okay, from this time
Speaker 1: to this time, this is when I want to work
Speaker 1: out or he'll train me. So my big thing was
Speaker 1: like getting back to being active and working out. That
Speaker 1: was the biggest thing because my mood. I noticed, like
Speaker 1: my mood is better when I work out each day,
Speaker 1: I have more energy than dorphins are running and and
Speaker 1: when I don't, I feel like I'm still in postpartum like.
Speaker 1: So working out has been the key for me. So
Speaker 1: getting back on track that was one of the biggest things.
Speaker 1: And then pulling in that help when you need it,
Speaker 1: even if you have to hire somebody, but I don't.
Speaker 1: I mean I don't hire anybody because I don't trust
Speaker 1: many people. But I don't trust anybody. That's why usually
Speaker 1: all of our kids end up at either house, so
Speaker 1: I'm like either droppable here and then we'll have eight
Speaker 1: almost nine kids here, or literally the other day Cass
Speaker 1: was like, I want to go down to Brianka's house,
Speaker 1: and I was like, I want to go down to
Speaker 1: Banka's house. And I'm like, okay, he's so in love
Speaker 1: with her. It's like the cutest thing. You'll have to
Speaker 1: see it. So I'm actually glad that you're closed by
Speaker 1: and we're close by, so you guys can have a
Speaker 1: relationship and our kids can have a relationship, you know
Speaker 1: what I mean, because it's a scary thing raising these
Speaker 1: kids nowadays, not knowing who they're going to end up
Speaker 1: being with. I low key, but hi, KEI want to
Speaker 1: arrange all my children's marriages, so I'm gonna be vetting
Speaker 1: daughters in law for anyone out there. I was just
Speaker 1: saying to be I was like, I wish Gazel was
Speaker 1: like a little bit younger Jackson was a little bit older,
Speaker 1: because that had been perfect and that way, I know
Speaker 1: that I jell with my in laws off the bat,
Speaker 1: and I wouldn't have to worry about liking people because
Speaker 1: I don't really like people like that. In case y'all
Speaker 1: didn't know, I know, Devils tells you all sometimes, but
Speaker 1: I really don't like people like that. That's that's crazy.
Speaker 1: But guess what, girls of people, how are you going
Speaker 1: to handle that, Like, do you ever look ahead and
Speaker 1: think to yourself, like how am I going to handle
Speaker 1: that when my son's actually get engaged or get married
Speaker 1: and what because it's kind of like the boys usually,
Speaker 1: like I don't know, it might just be in our family.
Speaker 1: The girl our kids are like more close to the
Speaker 1: mother's side of the family, just because I don't know
Speaker 1: why that is what it just is. Yeah, it kind
Speaker 1: of happens that way too for us to Yeah, though
Speaker 1: both families are pretty involved. My family is like super
Speaker 1: super involved, So the kids normally tend to gravitate more
Speaker 1: that way. And I think it's because of me being
Speaker 1: the woman and about being the man. So that does
Speaker 1: kind of concern me because I'm just like, damn it,
Speaker 1: my boy, they're gonna leave me, Like all of my
Speaker 1: boys are eventually gonna leave me, and they're gonna like
Speaker 1: cleave to their wife as the Bible says, and then
Speaker 1: what happens to me? You know, So the valley is
Speaker 1: just like you say that, like that's a bad thing.
Speaker 1: Like once the boys are going, it's not gonna be
Speaker 1: me and you rocking it out. And I'm like, you
Speaker 1: know what that is true? That is true, because we
Speaker 1: genuinely like our husbands. We do we do we like
Speaker 1: for the most part, Yeah, for the most part. Pretty
Speaker 1: cool dudes, you know. Um, but yeah, I think at
Speaker 1: that point, then shoot, I mean, I guess we'll have
Speaker 1: to just come to my house. I guess how come
Speaker 1: to your house, do a couple of trip from to
Speaker 1: the point that with the girls. Like that's the only
Speaker 1: thing that he does say all the time. He's like, well,
Speaker 1: girls don't ever go anywhere. Boys are gonna leave or whatever.
Speaker 1: So you have your daughters all this time, and I'm
Speaker 1: just like, that's true because when you think about it,
Speaker 1: when your daughters have babies, if they choose to, then
Speaker 1: you're probably gonna be like the first one there for it.
Speaker 1: Because I know my mom is like the first one
Speaker 1: there when I have my babies. So when my my
Speaker 1: my said granddaughters are born, I'm not All I know
Speaker 1: is that these holes better let me in the are
Speaker 1: we coming? We can hospital, I'm coming to the house
Speaker 1: kicking it in. I'm kicking it in. I don't care
Speaker 1: what you have to say. And hopefully my boys will
Speaker 1: know to be like, listen, my mom is gonna be
Speaker 1: She's gonna be maybe, so I say that I don't
Speaker 1: want to be the overbaby. I don't want to be
Speaker 1: the overbearing mother in law either though, because that can
Speaker 1: be that can suck to you know what I mean.
Speaker 1: I don't have an overbearing mother in law, so I
Speaker 1: don't know what that's like. I've heard of people, Um,
Speaker 1: I actually appreciate my my mother in law. I have
Speaker 1: and I have a great relationship where I lean on
Speaker 1: her and she's there when I need her, and then
Speaker 1: you know, she'll offer I'll say yes to know or whatever,
Speaker 1: but I usually appreciate the help. So yeah, I always
Speaker 1: appreci shade the help. Like with my mother in law.
Speaker 1: When she comes, she pretty much she'll do everything like
Speaker 1: it would be to the point that I'm like, no,
Speaker 1: don't wash my clothes, No, don't do this, don't rearrange
Speaker 1: my furniture, don't, don't don't don't break all my wine
Speaker 1: glasses at the very least, and if you're gonna break them,
Speaker 1: buy me some more. How about that is that? No,
Speaker 1: we have a great relationship as well, but it's just like,
Speaker 1: I don't know, it's just different. It's it's different when
Speaker 1: you have a mother in law versus your own mom,
Speaker 1: because you and your mother have been with each other
Speaker 1: the whole time, So your mom is not going to
Speaker 1: take something personal that my mother knows. Sometimes like girl
Speaker 1: and not in the mood, don't start with me today,
Speaker 1: just you know, kind of chill out, chill out. But
Speaker 1: your mother in law, you kind of feel like, can
Speaker 1: I really like, I don't want her to take it
Speaker 1: the wrong way, So chill We have We have some
Speaker 1: friends of ours that the husband and wife team of course,
Speaker 1: and the wife pretty much put like a time constraint
Speaker 1: on like how long the in laws can come over,
Speaker 1: so like her mother in law can only visit six
Speaker 1: weeks out of the year, and they can't be like combined,
Speaker 1: they have to be like spread out. And I was
Speaker 1: just kind of like, well, if that works for y'all,
Speaker 1: that would not work in my house. If that works
Speaker 1: for y'all. And I was just kind of like, oh
Speaker 1: and if I was like what, Kate could never tell
Speaker 1: me that mama has a cap on the number of
Speaker 1: times she comes or how long she can spend. Then
Speaker 1: it's like, okay, so when your mom comes, what are
Speaker 1: you gonna do? Are you going to allow your husband like, Okay,
Speaker 1: she's been here for eight hours. Apparently her and her
Speaker 1: mom are a little bit strange, so she doesn't even
Speaker 1: understand the relationship between like a mom wanting to come
Speaker 1: and be involved. So it was it was a touchy
Speaker 1: situation because we kind of got in the middle of
Speaker 1: like a just like a debate they were having, and
Speaker 1: what was kind of like, you know what it gets,
Speaker 1: It gets kind of awkward when you're married, friends and
Speaker 1: having conversations and you're just like, well, this is getting
Speaker 1: weird real fast. Okay, well I'm gonna we're gonna, We're
Speaker 1: gonna girl. Oh look at it. It's the kids calling
Speaker 1: like one of those situations. So yeah, that can. That
Speaker 1: can probably that's gonna be interesting to see as it girls.
Speaker 1: But of course with my boys, I want to be
Speaker 1: to have a relationship where they would feel comfortable saying, hey,
Speaker 1: my mom is here. She's she's always here when we
Speaker 1: need her, you know, much like what my mom does,
Speaker 1: like just just what where our investment is is in
Speaker 1: our families, you know what I mean. And I'm like,
Speaker 1: if I can't be there, I need my mom to
Speaker 1: be there. She's like the next best thing to me,
Speaker 1: you know what I'm saying. So rounding out our conversation.
Speaker 1: Of course I have to touch on because this is
Speaker 1: always like the thing we get asked the most, having
Speaker 1: multiple children and of course having husbands, how do you
Speaker 1: make time for your husband and and for the relationship
Speaker 1: side of things, because you know, we talk about having
Speaker 1: the baby, then getting yourself back in order, getting yourself
Speaker 1: back in shape for yourself, getting your yourself back in
Speaker 1: shape for your spouse, which I believe is a thing
Speaker 1: because I'm like who he fell in love with and
Speaker 1: the way we created these babies, and the person he
Speaker 1: approached to have these babies with. I'd like to at
Speaker 1: least give him that person back at some point. So
Speaker 1: how do you and Keith work around, um, just maintaining
Speaker 1: your relationship in the hysteria and craziness that is five kids?
Speaker 1: So the great thing now that the kids are back
Speaker 1: in school, we just have the one at home, which
Speaker 1: is real and she's pretty go well, she's pretty good
Speaker 1: with the flow at Keith. I'm not even gonna lie,
Speaker 1: she's not going with the flow with me, but um,
Speaker 1: creating that time nap time, will have a little time
Speaker 1: to go, or letting her go to one of my
Speaker 1: friend's house or whatever like that to get the lunch
Speaker 1: dates in dinner dates are cool because of course we
Speaker 1: have teenagers, so we're like Friday night, Wednesday night, whatever night,
Speaker 1: we're gonna be out, like about sending up time where
Speaker 1: it's just us, even like traveling, like we'll take little
Speaker 1: many vacations with just each other because that's that's a
Speaker 1: part of it. I feel like you have to reconnect
Speaker 1: because on that end, guys don't feel like after you
Speaker 1: have kids are like, oh you look good, Like I
Speaker 1: feel like they're just like, oh you look good, you
Speaker 1: look great. You look at this, and you're like and
Speaker 1: then so you're like, no, I don't you say we
Speaker 1: can't even fit my clothes. Girl, if it pray to
Speaker 1: devouts still chasing me down, I'm like, bro, there's already
Speaker 1: a baby in there we were trying to do and
Speaker 1: it's and it's true because there I feel like they
Speaker 1: just don't have an off switch. It's just they do switch.
Speaker 1: They just see asks and they're just like, let me
Speaker 1: just I just gotta touch ask. And then you're just
Speaker 1: like all that stuff and it's like, what's going on.
Speaker 1: That's that's literally what we do with all day, all wait,
Speaker 1: all day, but loky, it's look, it's cute, it's cute,
Speaker 1: it's real cute, especially in the kitchen, and then you
Speaker 1: just get a little that's cute right, and it makes
Speaker 1: you feel like, Okay, I still got it, even at
Speaker 1: eight months pregnant, or even at four months postpardon when
Speaker 1: you still don't feel like yourself. But it's just also
Speaker 1: as women, I get it, like it is internally we're
Speaker 1: just like, man, I'm not at my best right now
Speaker 1: creating time, creating time. That's creating time and scheduling it,
Speaker 1: planning it and sticking to it. That's the thing. Like
Speaker 1: if anything pops up, we're like, no, remember we have
Speaker 1: non negotiable we're gonna do this, and not talking about
Speaker 1: work when we are on We're like, nothing about work.
Speaker 1: I don't want to hear it. I don't want to
Speaker 1: see it. I don't want to I don't I want
Speaker 1: to clock out like you're clocked out. So I don't
Speaker 1: realize that about us too. We have that also similar
Speaker 1: Let's which makes sense that why you were such a
Speaker 1: perfect guest for today, not just for girl talk, but
Speaker 1: because we have a lot of similarities. That and that
Speaker 1: working together with your spouse can be a whole another
Speaker 1: can of worms. It can a whole another can of worms,
Speaker 1: because it's like, who am I talking to? Am I
Speaker 1: talking to a devout? The husband develop the father devlop,
Speaker 1: my business partner, um developed, my mentor because he's trying
Speaker 1: to help me, like do something. And then I have
Speaker 1: to almost check myself sometimes with like how I'm talking
Speaker 1: to each person because it could end up in an
Speaker 1: argument or a fight. Or it's like he's the kind
Speaker 1: of person that doesn't clock out like ever. He's always on,
Speaker 1: He's always going, and that's something we have to always
Speaker 1: work at. When you talk about scheduling in time, that's
Speaker 1: something that I have to kind of be on him
Speaker 1: about and say, you know what, now is not work time?
Speaker 1: You know. For him, it's just like, well, you know,
Speaker 1: I can't turn off because I'm the provider and he
Speaker 1: takes pride in being the provider and the family, and
Speaker 1: I think, which is fine about similarity as well, to
Speaker 1: the point that I'll just like if we're at dinner
Speaker 1: and he's like, oh, did you send DZ, I'm like,
Speaker 1: uh no, no, not talking about that, talking about that,
Speaker 1: and he's like but but, and I'm like, but, but, but,
Speaker 1: but do you see where we're at? Do you see
Speaker 1: is there a computer in front of my face? I
Speaker 1: know I got my phone and I can do it,
Speaker 1: but we're not doing that right now. We're eating down,
Speaker 1: We're gonna have this drink. Girl, that would be me.
Speaker 1: I'd be like, I just booked the ticket to go
Speaker 1: on a trip for the weekend. He be like, that's it.
Speaker 1: I'll just talk to our manager and look at the
Speaker 1: schedule like, oh, there's nothing going on in those days.
Speaker 1: We're gonna clock out what we're going to go. But
Speaker 1: that's what we need and that's what we need. And
Speaker 1: I feel like that's the balance too, because Keith has
Speaker 1: said that he was like Okay, I feel like you're
Speaker 1: the one who's kind of like okay, cool, cool, collected
Speaker 1: until something like blows up. Like Keith is like, if
Speaker 1: it's not if it's not perfect, it's just not it's
Speaker 1: not happening, it's not existent, And I'm like things are
Speaker 1: not going to be perfect all the time, so let's
Speaker 1: just go and find a way to pivot. Yep. I
Speaker 1: think it's a football life to coming from that. It's
Speaker 1: like they have yeah that they just kind of like
Speaker 1: they can't maneuver from that. Sometimes so and in walks
Speaker 1: us saving the day and just saying, you know, we
Speaker 1: need some time. We put our capes on and we
Speaker 1: make it happy for them, you know what I mean?
Speaker 1: So what do you have to be? What do you
Speaker 1: have to say to people who say, you know what,
Speaker 1: you got too many damn kids? Have you ever gotten that?
Speaker 1: Like someone just look at you and be like so
Speaker 1: many kids? About that? Mind your business and your ovaries?
Speaker 1: Why I stay over here in my mind that part exactly,
Speaker 1: And as long as we're not making any more at
Speaker 1: this point, because I think you're done, is it fair
Speaker 1: to say I believe I am finished? Has Keith going
Speaker 1: back in the middle of the question, did he go
Speaker 1: back in to get his semen tested? That's what he wants.
Speaker 1: Does he have any sem He has not, And he's
Speaker 1: been like, oh, you've been working out. I'm like, back up, Oh,
Speaker 1: so the body is back in order. So he's like yeah,
Speaker 1: He's like, hey, look, oh you look good. Let me
Speaker 1: I'm like, are you on any birth control? No? But
Speaker 1: I'm not having any more kids. I'm not I'm not
Speaker 1: like this. I'm like the Heisman, like when it comes to,
Speaker 1: I'm like, and then since he's like at the point
Speaker 1: where you know, like our kids when they were younger,
Speaker 1: they all slept in their own own, their own they
Speaker 1: had their own schedule whatever. We never allowed them in
Speaker 1: our bed with us. That was like our time. Make
Speaker 1: sure they go to bed at eight o'clock. So we
Speaker 1: have and she got my kids. Yea, yeah, you're going
Speaker 1: to bed at eight. And still now I'll tell them
Speaker 1: like they're teenager and I'm like, it's nine o'clock. Y'all
Speaker 1: got a wine, dawn or going to basement. So um.
Speaker 1: With that being said, it's like Keith kind of just whatever, yeah,
Speaker 1: I heard it. Whatever. He get checked out. She's over
Speaker 1: here running dirty, y'all. So I'm not having any more kids.
Speaker 1: We talked about that even though it's riding dirty. I
Speaker 1: want to see your riding dirty. Want to see your
Speaker 1: riding dirty, not writing. I mean, depends on what you am,
Speaker 1: but you know what I am. But it's not going well.
Speaker 1: Do you feel like it's well? I mean, I guess
Speaker 1: because the discussion now is like, Okaycautine, You've had three
Speaker 1: almost four children. I feel like I've done my fair share.
Speaker 1: I've done my share of birth control over the years.
Speaker 1: Now it's your turn, brow because the same I don't
Speaker 1: like any We talked about the I U. D last
Speaker 1: season and how that just jacked up everything for me
Speaker 1: in general, with my mood, my libido, everything. So I'm
Speaker 1: like at this point, I'm like, it's on you, bro,
Speaker 1: like snippitty snippity, I mean, and get get checked. If
Speaker 1: you do, please go be on them to the cup.
Speaker 1: Get I'm tested. Could there be one or two they
Speaker 1: want to they want to be Maybe we'll send him
Speaker 1: and Keith together. Keith can go for his check up
Speaker 1: and then can go for his his procedure, and then
Speaker 1: it could be a thing where they're just like bonding
Speaker 1: over it. They can have lunch after and it could
Speaker 1: be a whole day out. They act like they literally
Speaker 1: can't do nothing afterwards. So we had whole babies and
Speaker 1: be up walking doing doing stuff the next day and
Speaker 1: they'd be like, oh my god, so funny. Alright, girl,
Speaker 1: so listen at I did as podcast. So we do. Um.
Speaker 1: I forgot where we were for a second. I felt
Speaker 1: like a girl chat. It felt like it was just
Speaker 1: me and her here. I forgot there's a microphone. I've
Speaker 1: got you all we're listening. Oh my god. So we're
Speaker 1: gonna come back because we have a segment call listener letters,
Speaker 1: and people write into us and they want all the advice. Um,
Speaker 1: And though we don't claim to be experts, I say,
Speaker 1: if I can get you on my little two sins
Speaker 1: and it helps, then all the better. So that would
Speaker 1: be very interested to see what they have to say.
Speaker 1: And if you don't mind sticking around, we can do
Speaker 1: some listener letters together. I'm leaving, no girl, you're saying
Speaker 1: you're definitely staying. So we're gonna take a quick breaky'all,
Speaker 1: and we're gonna move into listener letters after we get
Speaker 1: into some ads. All right, We're back for listener letters,
Speaker 1: which Devel always says is my favorite portion because I'd
Speaker 1: be nosy and I want to be in people's business.
Speaker 1: I can't be in y'all business if y'all don't write
Speaker 1: to me. Okay. So that's the way I see it. Okay,
Speaker 1: So today me and Bean, I'm gonna be all up
Speaker 1: in your business. So here's the first one. All right,
Speaker 1: So here's a little story for um. I first want
Speaker 1: to thank you guys for making this podcast. It's been
Speaker 1: such a help, You're welcome. I'm a twenty six year
Speaker 1: old woman, and I've noticed that one point at one point,
Speaker 1: you guys continually bring up finding your purpose and not
Speaker 1: relying on others to make you feel fulfilled. I've heard
Speaker 1: this from a number of people in my life as well.
Speaker 1: The question is how everyone seems to have some idea
Speaker 1: of what they want their future to look like or
Speaker 1: where they want their careers to go, and I'm just stuck.
Speaker 1: My friends and colleagues have these grandiose plans for their careers,
Speaker 1: and I feel like I'm just along for the ride.
Speaker 1: I've considered how I'd like to climb the corporate ladder
Speaker 1: and what I'd like people to say or think about
Speaker 1: me when I'm gone, but there is nothing that makes
Speaker 1: me happy. Wow. I don't feel the need to be
Speaker 1: the big boss or the change maker of my industry,
Speaker 1: and that feels like the only form of passion that's
Speaker 1: out there. Don't get me wrong, I do enjoy the
Speaker 1: work that I do, but it doesn't spark a passion
Speaker 1: in me. How do I find my passion? What advice
Speaker 1: do you have for this good? Since she's twenty six,
Speaker 1: she's still young. Um, still trying to figure things out.
Speaker 1: I mean, did you know you're passionate? Because I know,
Speaker 1: I sure as hell didn't mean I knew what I
Speaker 1: was passionate about, which was many things. We see. I'm
Speaker 1: a Jim Nabby like okay, So I feel like UM,
Speaker 1: with that being said, she probably needs to go into
Speaker 1: self discovery and see what she really enjoys and what
Speaker 1: she really likes or what she's really familiar with. For me,
Speaker 1: it was like real estate. I come from a family
Speaker 1: that did real estate, had their own real estate business,
Speaker 1: did a lot of rehabs, did a lot of subdivisions,
Speaker 1: so quite naturally, that was what I did and what
Speaker 1: I still do. UM, So I think that that would
Speaker 1: be a good basis to start is self discovery. See
Speaker 1: what you like and it doesn't. I feel like a
Speaker 1: lot of people get caught up with thinking it might
Speaker 1: just be one thing. It might not be just one thing.
Speaker 1: You might have many interests. And I don't have a
Speaker 1: problem with um having multiple businesses as long as you
Speaker 1: are able to handle that, or working for someone. She
Speaker 1: says she doesn't. She just wants to be incorporate American.
Speaker 1: Works for someone that's good. That's good too. I mean,
Speaker 1: she's twenty six. You're young. Why do people have to
Speaker 1: put so much pressure to think that you have to
Speaker 1: have all figured out at twenty six. You're not gonna
Speaker 1: have it figured out. You're not gonna have it figured
Speaker 1: all out at thirty. Some people do and some people don't.
Speaker 1: But me, I personally like even at thirty five, I
Speaker 1: was kind of like, um, thirty five, what do I
Speaker 1: want to do now? Right? Five? Like I was waking
Speaker 1: all out. You think about that, the age, You're just like,
Speaker 1: oh my god, the age, the number, this is where
Speaker 1: I am. I supposed to be here, You should be
Speaker 1: here doing this, this, this, this that, and um. More
Speaker 1: so focused on the things that you have already that
Speaker 1: you've already been able to accomplish, and focus more on
Speaker 1: that versus what you don't have or what you want
Speaker 1: to be like. And who says what, because let's be real,
Speaker 1: people are gonna say what they want to say. They're
Speaker 1: talking about just literally just said that in our last episode.
Speaker 1: He was just like Jesus said, haters, Jesus scrutinized him.
Speaker 1: So yeah, it's really though. Yeah, And I think also
Speaker 1: not comparing your successes to the others around exactly because
Speaker 1: they may have had things figured out by now. That
Speaker 1: doesn't mean that you have to per se And I
Speaker 1: might not have it figured out. You just don't know.
Speaker 1: That's a fact. It could be smokes and merracists. It
Speaker 1: could be a facif you never know. But yeah, I
Speaker 1: mean at twenty six, I want to say that even
Speaker 1: now at thirty something years old, I'm still kind of
Speaker 1: re evaluating what it is I want to do because
Speaker 1: at different phases in your life, you're evolving and you're changing,
Speaker 1: and it may not be any one thing like you
Speaker 1: said that you're passionate about. So I say, give yourself
Speaker 1: a little graces. You still have some time to figure
Speaker 1: things out. And then I'm not sure how much you're
Speaker 1: out there trying different things, but you may want to
Speaker 1: try different things to see, Okay, if your excitement is
Speaker 1: not going to be um in your career and that's
Speaker 1: not going to be your passionate because I don't think
Speaker 1: passion is anonymous with career. Per se. It maybe your
Speaker 1: life's work. It maybe you volunteering, you're taking up some
Speaker 1: kind of charity work, you're working with children. She didn't
Speaker 1: want to be a world changer either. Oh, you don't
Speaker 1: want to be all She doesn't want to be a
Speaker 1: world changer. So you just want to say, we don't
Speaker 1: know what you want to do. Girl, girl, girl, I
Speaker 1: don't know. We don't know what to tell you don't know,
Speaker 1: we don't know. We can't tell you what to do.
Speaker 1: We can't tell you what we can just give you
Speaker 1: some advice. So she don't want to change the world.
Speaker 1: So if you just want to be out there kind
Speaker 1: of just existing, maybe it'll find you at some point.
Speaker 1: How about that, Maybe your passion will find you one
Speaker 1: of these days you never know, or it could be
Speaker 1: your passion that you don't know is maybe eventually when
Speaker 1: you get married having children. So people are passionate about
Speaker 1: motherhood or parenthood passion. I'm still passionate about motherhood. I
Speaker 1: think that's like my stas the number one job. It's
Speaker 1: the best hood, to be best hood, the best hood.
Speaker 1: So good luck to you since as you figure that out.
Speaker 1: But don't put yourself on any time restraints either, because
Speaker 1: we always tend to have this mental checklist in our
Speaker 1: head of like ages that we're supposed to be correlating
Speaker 1: to having things particularly done or started. And I feel
Speaker 1: like sometimes you have checked that list and just ride
Speaker 1: the wave. Can you figure it out? Stress yourself out,
Speaker 1: give yourself anxiety all type and stuff we need that.
Speaker 1: We don't need that, all right. Number two. I just
Speaker 1: had my fiftieth birthday in May gem and I woo
Speaker 1: oh yeah girl, let's see. And I have a thing
Speaker 1: for Geminis Bianca and another one of my best friends,
Speaker 1: Christina Geminis too. So um, I'm recently divorced after sixteen years.
Speaker 1: He cheated the entire time. Oh, I have four kids,
Speaker 1: thirty one, twenty twelve, and seven. No idea what I
Speaker 1: was thinking. The age gaps, all right, I mean it
Speaker 1: happened though. Um anyway, I feel like I'm ready to
Speaker 1: get back out in date. But my problem is I
Speaker 1: don't like men my age. I'm only attracted to men
Speaker 1: between thirty to forty ish. You a cougar, real, right,
Speaker 1: real real? I do not look my age, so I'm
Speaker 1: often approached by younger men as well. This concerns me
Speaker 1: because my ex husband was eleven years younger than me,
Speaker 1: and I wonder if this could be why we didn't
Speaker 1: make it. I've tried older men and think about them
Speaker 1: interests me. They could be fine. As hell and still nothing.
Speaker 1: What's wrong with me? I don't know, it's always It's
Speaker 1: always been this way, and I don't know why, but
Speaker 1: I know I like it. Should I continue to try
Speaker 1: and date older men or just be true to myself
Speaker 1: and stick with the young bucks girl? Girl? What do
Speaker 1: you well? She said? I mean, she said, she just
Speaker 1: celebrated her fiftieth birthday and she doesn't look fifty? What
Speaker 1: you look like? Because I mean, you know, I'm not
Speaker 1: going to to my own horn, but I'm want to say,
Speaker 1: as I'm approaching forty, I feel like, you know, what
Speaker 1: exactly does that look like? Anymore? We think about like
Speaker 1: what four year olds look like in our parents generation
Speaker 1: versus now they were looking and I'm still trying to
Speaker 1: I think I could still I could still pull me
Speaker 1: a little like Crown. Yeah, a little early thirties, late
Speaker 1: twenties guy, if I needed to, you know what I mean.
Speaker 1: So I think that I think that maybe you should
Speaker 1: start to look for connections with people personality wise too,
Speaker 1: Like you see, they look good. It's like, Okay, do
Speaker 1: we have anything in common or are we just looking
Speaker 1: at age? Because it's ounds like that you are just
Speaker 1: looking at age because you said they could be fine,
Speaker 1: and you're still like, I don't know about them, So
Speaker 1: what is it? Is it the age that's intriguing you?
Speaker 1: It must be right, it seems like you have it,
Speaker 1: because then it does it feel weird to you that
Speaker 1: you have a thirty one year old child but you're
Speaker 1: dating year old or a possible thirty something, so then
Speaker 1: you're thirty one year old. Gotta be like, is my
Speaker 1: mom gonna date all my friends when I bring him
Speaker 1: over here? Then is he gonna getting nervy or she
Speaker 1: getting nervous? Like wait a second, maybe I shouldn't take
Speaker 1: you all over to my mama. She might get she
Speaker 1: might just get you for sure. So yeah, I mean,
Speaker 1: at this point, I feel like, having been married for
Speaker 1: sixteen years, you're now fifty. I feel like and he
Speaker 1: was cheating the entire time. I feel like, just do
Speaker 1: you what does that you are you into? I'm not
Speaker 1: saying you're Russian because you didn't say that. You you
Speaker 1: said you wanted to get back dating. So dating is cool.
Speaker 1: Dating is cool. I feel like go ahead and just
Speaker 1: dating dabble, you know, just you know, test the appetizers
Speaker 1: out there, see the young bucks. And she's trying to
Speaker 1: see she's asking. She continued to stick with dating guys older.
Speaker 1: I mean, if you're not attracted to older men, then
Speaker 1: that's just an right there because maybe you just don't
Speaker 1: worry about their age at first, just don't even ask them.
Speaker 1: Will make sure they're legal, and I would think to
Speaker 1: at fifty something. If you're dating somebody like thirty to forty,
Speaker 1: you also have to make sure like does this person
Speaker 1: want children? Is they're like, like, what is the intentions?
Speaker 1: You should be deliberate with what you're putting out there.
Speaker 1: What's the intention for you? Guys? Is that that you're
Speaker 1: just dating to have a good time and have you
Speaker 1: know a companion or are you dating with a purpose
Speaker 1: for something else? Because you also don't want to be
Speaker 1: that older woman that eventually this thirty something your role
Speaker 1: is like I want kids and you're like, I'm pushing sixty.
Speaker 1: My eggs are like depleted or fried? Yeah, they so
Speaker 1: be purposeful with how you're approaching it. But I say,
Speaker 1: stick to what you what you like. If you like
Speaker 1: a guy that airs on the younger side, then go
Speaker 1: for it. Why not, especially if you can pay them, girl,
Speaker 1: go for you good creative, good for you. UM, I
Speaker 1: would say, yeah, stick with the young ones if you
Speaker 1: if you like that sort of thing, but then don't
Speaker 1: put too much emphasis on age, Like if you start
Speaker 1: to connect, look for the connection. Look for the connection.
Speaker 1: You might learn that you start to like something a
Speaker 1: little bit older, a little bit more seasoned, a little
Speaker 1: bit you know, because that is true with the kids situation.
Speaker 1: What are you gonna do if they want to have
Speaker 1: kids and you're beyond kid point or you don't want anymore.
Speaker 1: That's a fact. There you go. I hope that helps
Speaker 1: you out today. And if you want to be featured
Speaker 1: is one of our listener letters. Be sure to email
Speaker 1: us at dead as Advice at gmail dot com. Alright, Banca,
Speaker 1: So at the end of every episode, before we leave,
Speaker 1: we have something called the Moment of Truth where it
Speaker 1: just pretty much like sums up the entire episode, Like,
Speaker 1: what's the little takeaway that people can take from this episode? Um,
Speaker 1: based off of everything we said, because we spoke about
Speaker 1: all the things. We spoke about having multiple children, juggling
Speaker 1: that husband's style, stepping and parenting accordingly. So what's a
Speaker 1: little tidbit that you can leave the listeners today? Little
Speaker 1: tidbit guys. I don't know. Basically, just to you know,
Speaker 1: try to do you, try to do you. That's it
Speaker 1: because when you're a mother, you put a lot of
Speaker 1: emphasis and time into your children. When you're married, your husband,
Speaker 1: if you're with someone, your partner. So I would say
Speaker 1: for moms out there, to take that extra time and
Speaker 1: if it's an hour, you can do it. You can
Speaker 1: do anything for an hour. So I would just say
Speaker 1: take that extra time that you need, meditate, work out,
Speaker 1: do something that you enjoy, go to home goods, got
Speaker 1: to target. That's it. I like that. I like that.
Speaker 1: Sometimes Bianca I will call together. We're just like, hey,
Speaker 1: let's go to Sam'. That's my moment of truth. If
Speaker 1: you ever need a moment, get you a friend and
Speaker 1: go to the store and get you that's your friend.
Speaker 1: Gets you a Bianca in your life who you can
Speaker 1: sit with, you can chat, you can have girl talk,
Speaker 1: no judgment anytime. We're just down for each other. Board,
Speaker 1: make a charcuterie board. Why when I could drink wine.
Speaker 1: I can't wait, actually a mock tail tail. Yeah, I
Speaker 1: can't wait to just be back where I could just
Speaker 1: really enjoy and partake in the spirits. That's one more month. Yeah,
Speaker 1: he's over here, over here, trying to kick his way
Speaker 1: out in the meantime. And mine is get you a friend,
Speaker 1: Get you a friend, especially if you have mad kids
Speaker 1: that you can just say what you know, what you
Speaker 1: got mad kids, I got mad kids. Let's get all
Speaker 1: these kids together and we could just sit and make
Speaker 1: an evening out of it. They'll entertain each other and
Speaker 1: take up stairs, take the downstairs, kick them out, kick
Speaker 1: that kids out. That's the take. That's it. While you're
Speaker 1: doing that, be sure to follow us on social media
Speaker 1: at dead Ass the podcast. I'm Cadeen, I am, And
Speaker 1: of course you can follow Heavy who's not here today.
Speaker 1: He's probably keep somewhere doing something. Hopefully they're arranging that
Speaker 1: vasectomy appointment. Maybe I am developed follow him and see
Speaker 1: what he says. And if you're listening to Apple podcasts,
Speaker 1: be sure to rate, review, and subscribe. Dead Ass Did
Speaker 1: it as dead Ass is a production of I Heart
Speaker 1: Media podcast Network and is produced by Dinorapinia and Triple
Speaker 1: Follow the podcast on social media at dead as the
Speaker 1: Podcasts and never miss a Thing