1 00:00:02,040 --> 00:00:04,880 Speaker 1: Welcome to Katie's Crib, a production of Shonda Land Audio 2 00:00:05,000 --> 00:00:08,200 Speaker 1: in partnership with I Heart Radio. It's amazing though as 3 00:00:08,240 --> 00:00:11,040 Speaker 1: a mother, I feel like when I'm locked in those 4 00:00:11,080 --> 00:00:13,760 Speaker 1: power struggle moments where I'm like, oh my god, how 5 00:00:13,800 --> 00:00:17,880 Speaker 1: are you capable of arguing like an attorney and you're 6 00:00:17,960 --> 00:00:24,720 Speaker 1: only a child? And I can simultaneously me in like 7 00:00:25,560 --> 00:00:30,080 Speaker 1: total frustration, but there's this tiny little voice that's like, 8 00:00:30,320 --> 00:00:33,000 Speaker 1: You're gonna be okay, kid. Yeah. Yeah. I feel the 9 00:00:33,000 --> 00:00:34,440 Speaker 1: same way, like, oh my god, this is going to 10 00:00:34,520 --> 00:00:45,600 Speaker 1: make an exceptional adult. Hi, everybody, Welcome back to Katie's Crib. 11 00:00:46,080 --> 00:00:49,720 Speaker 1: My very, very good friend is on the podcast today. 12 00:00:49,920 --> 00:00:54,000 Speaker 1: I love her. We are Shonda Land family. You know her, 13 00:00:54,120 --> 00:00:57,440 Speaker 1: you love her as Dr Amelia Shephard on Gray's Anatomy. 14 00:00:57,600 --> 00:01:01,880 Speaker 1: She is Katarinas Scorsone. She and I talk about so 15 00:01:01,960 --> 00:01:04,959 Speaker 1: much stuff, raising three children in a pandemic. She's got 16 00:01:05,000 --> 00:01:08,160 Speaker 1: three girls. Katerina was a doula. Did you know that 17 00:01:08,200 --> 00:01:11,679 Speaker 1: she like trained as a dula. Her daughter Pippa has 18 00:01:11,800 --> 00:01:15,440 Speaker 1: Down syndrome, and we talk a lot about what that's 19 00:01:15,480 --> 00:01:18,720 Speaker 1: like in her life, Teachable moments and engaging in conversations 20 00:01:18,720 --> 00:01:23,000 Speaker 1: about disability. We talked about equity versus equality. We talk 21 00:01:23,080 --> 00:01:26,680 Speaker 1: about life on set. Guys, this is a great episode. 22 00:01:26,760 --> 00:01:29,080 Speaker 1: We talk about a lot of different stuff. And if 23 00:01:29,120 --> 00:01:32,679 Speaker 1: you don't know who Katarina Scorsone is, that's crazy. But 24 00:01:32,760 --> 00:01:36,240 Speaker 1: if you don't, here's a little bit more about her. 25 00:01:36,680 --> 00:01:39,520 Speaker 1: Before she was Dr Amilia Shepherd on Gray's Anatomy. She 26 00:01:39,600 --> 00:01:42,840 Speaker 1: was Dr Emilias Shepherd on Private Practice. She's also Dr 27 00:01:42,880 --> 00:01:45,920 Speaker 1: Amilias Shepherd on Station nineteen. What Watch on the Land? 28 00:01:46,040 --> 00:01:50,160 Speaker 1: So many shows, so many shows, so awesome. Offscreen, Katerina's 29 00:01:50,160 --> 00:01:52,840 Speaker 1: passion and purpose has been centered on her family, and 30 00:01:52,880 --> 00:01:55,200 Speaker 1: like I mentioned, it includes her four year old daughter, Pippa, 31 00:01:55,240 --> 00:01:57,760 Speaker 1: who was born with Down syndrome, and in recent years 32 00:01:57,800 --> 00:02:00,520 Speaker 1: she's been using her platform to promote greater understanding and 33 00:02:00,560 --> 00:02:03,400 Speaker 1: awareness and an effort to end stigmas around Down syndrome 34 00:02:03,400 --> 00:02:07,600 Speaker 1: and other disabilities. Katerina, thank you for coming onto Katie's crib. 35 00:02:09,880 --> 00:02:15,200 Speaker 1: I'm so happy to see you. So great. I am 36 00:02:15,400 --> 00:02:19,800 Speaker 1: so happy to see you. I have missed you. Um 37 00:02:19,840 --> 00:02:22,440 Speaker 1: it was made very clear by Seana Riymes that Grayson 38 00:02:22,480 --> 00:02:26,600 Speaker 1: Natomy and Scandal did not exist in the same world. Um, 39 00:02:26,639 --> 00:02:29,120 Speaker 1: So I'm very grateful that, in the name of motherhood, 40 00:02:29,200 --> 00:02:33,640 Speaker 1: we are currently creating our own crossover moment. We are, 41 00:02:34,040 --> 00:02:36,600 Speaker 1: we are. But you were on we met on private practice. 42 00:02:36,720 --> 00:02:41,520 Speaker 1: Oh yeah, I was on you. Oh please? I was fine. 43 00:02:43,080 --> 00:02:45,600 Speaker 1: But turns out it's a lesson never learned. I played 44 00:02:45,600 --> 00:02:47,880 Speaker 1: a mother. It was my first ever working job in 45 00:02:47,919 --> 00:02:50,920 Speaker 1: shaan Alyn. I played a mom who left her baby 46 00:02:51,000 --> 00:02:53,120 Speaker 1: in the backseat of her car because she was too tired, 47 00:02:53,120 --> 00:02:57,800 Speaker 1: and the baby asphyxiated and fried, and it was terrible 48 00:02:57,960 --> 00:03:00,399 Speaker 1: that I that I think I should not be less 49 00:03:01,120 --> 00:03:06,240 Speaker 1: That was the most horrifying of all The writer of 50 00:03:06,280 --> 00:03:09,240 Speaker 1: that episode, I think someone told me, like that actually 51 00:03:09,320 --> 00:03:13,240 Speaker 1: happens to like ten babies a year. Like the terrible thing. 52 00:03:13,400 --> 00:03:16,480 Speaker 1: They have apparently technology that you put in your car 53 00:03:16,520 --> 00:03:20,480 Speaker 1: seat that can tell if like the weight hasn't lifted 54 00:03:20,480 --> 00:03:22,600 Speaker 1: out of the car seat, and if it hasn't been 55 00:03:22,639 --> 00:03:25,000 Speaker 1: when you leave, like an alarm goes off or something. 56 00:03:25,040 --> 00:03:28,600 Speaker 1: Because it's a big enough issue that they were able 57 00:03:28,680 --> 00:03:33,280 Speaker 1: to find like investors for that project because there's demand. 58 00:03:34,120 --> 00:03:36,320 Speaker 1: That's horrifying, but it goes to show you, like how 59 00:03:36,440 --> 00:03:39,800 Speaker 1: tired or in your routine you're in as a mom, 60 00:03:39,880 --> 00:03:42,200 Speaker 1: and like when you're pushed to the limits and you 61 00:03:42,280 --> 00:03:46,360 Speaker 1: just you forget their baby in the car um First 62 00:03:46,400 --> 00:03:50,360 Speaker 1: and foremost from that lovely topic, how are you doing? 63 00:03:50,720 --> 00:03:53,440 Speaker 1: You are raising any year old, a four year old, 64 00:03:53,480 --> 00:03:56,200 Speaker 1: and a one year old the majority of the pandemic, 65 00:03:56,240 --> 00:03:59,720 Speaker 1: I only had one. How's the year been? Well, I 66 00:03:59,760 --> 00:04:03,720 Speaker 1: don't oh, it's been it's been crazy, but it's been 67 00:04:03,840 --> 00:04:09,040 Speaker 1: kind of beautiful. It's been kind of beautiful to have 68 00:04:09,160 --> 00:04:11,320 Speaker 1: all of the like crops of your existence just like 69 00:04:11,360 --> 00:04:13,120 Speaker 1: totally stripped from you and you have to kind of 70 00:04:13,160 --> 00:04:16,039 Speaker 1: like make it work. Were you home schooling the eight 71 00:04:16,120 --> 00:04:20,520 Speaker 1: year old? Yes, like with math and reading and stuff. 72 00:04:20,560 --> 00:04:29,600 Speaker 1: I mean, let's be clear, I was facilitating her on zoom. Also, 73 00:04:29,880 --> 00:04:34,679 Speaker 1: my sister moved in with me, and so I had help. 74 00:04:34,800 --> 00:04:37,360 Speaker 1: And I want to be crystal clear about that. Yes, 75 00:04:37,440 --> 00:04:40,440 Speaker 1: I have three children, but no one can do this 76 00:04:40,520 --> 00:04:42,400 Speaker 1: on their own. And so for all of the people 77 00:04:42,440 --> 00:04:51,000 Speaker 1: who are literally completely isolated, I mean, yeah, there's nothing 78 00:04:51,040 --> 00:04:53,560 Speaker 1: to even say about that, because I have a village also, 79 00:04:53,720 --> 00:04:58,080 Speaker 1: and I don't even understand. I literally don't understand, Like 80 00:04:58,160 --> 00:05:00,400 Speaker 1: I just had to bring on an addish an old 81 00:05:00,440 --> 00:05:03,839 Speaker 1: babysitter because I'm shooting at the same time that my 82 00:05:03,960 --> 00:05:07,400 Speaker 1: husband's shooting and doing his pretzel business, and like we 83 00:05:07,440 --> 00:05:09,800 Speaker 1: couldn't handle it all, and it was totally insane. And 84 00:05:10,000 --> 00:05:12,359 Speaker 1: with multiple children in Zoom school, you can't buy locate. 85 00:05:12,440 --> 00:05:14,400 Speaker 1: You have to have like one kid on one computer 86 00:05:14,480 --> 00:05:16,600 Speaker 1: and then another kid. I mean with Hippa, she has 87 00:05:16,600 --> 00:05:18,120 Speaker 1: a lot of therapy so that she does, and so 88 00:05:18,160 --> 00:05:22,400 Speaker 1: she's on another computer doing like occupational therapy and you 89 00:05:22,400 --> 00:05:26,520 Speaker 1: you literally cannot do it all totally. There was no 90 00:05:26,600 --> 00:05:31,280 Speaker 1: pretending anymore that we could be these like self sustaining, 91 00:05:31,640 --> 00:05:34,440 Speaker 1: isolate super moms. I've got it all going on. No 92 00:05:34,520 --> 00:05:38,479 Speaker 1: one sees behind closed doors, but you know, like, yeah, no, 93 00:05:38,640 --> 00:05:41,440 Speaker 1: it was a complete shit show. It was actually show. 94 00:05:41,560 --> 00:05:44,320 Speaker 1: But that gave us all permission to be messy and 95 00:05:44,400 --> 00:05:48,360 Speaker 1: permission to go, oh, I need community. I can't do this, 96 00:05:48,680 --> 00:05:51,720 Speaker 1: and it's unreasonable for anyone to expect me to do this. 97 00:05:51,720 --> 00:05:54,120 Speaker 1: This is not like a you know, like a moral failing. 98 00:05:54,160 --> 00:05:56,040 Speaker 1: This is not laziness. This is not like, oh, I 99 00:05:56,040 --> 00:05:58,440 Speaker 1: should have had better executive function and plan my time. 100 00:05:58,760 --> 00:06:01,919 Speaker 1: This is like no effing way. Sorry, I don't know 101 00:06:01,920 --> 00:06:04,120 Speaker 1: if I'm allowed to swear on that you Oh my god, 102 00:06:04,360 --> 00:06:08,520 Speaker 1: welcome to my Yes, you're fine, you want Yeah, you 103 00:06:08,600 --> 00:06:11,240 Speaker 1: come from a big family, So was that something you 104 00:06:11,320 --> 00:06:14,560 Speaker 1: knew you wanted? I did want three. And then there 105 00:06:14,640 --> 00:06:17,120 Speaker 1: was a while where I thought maybe maybe I could 106 00:06:17,120 --> 00:06:21,480 Speaker 1: only handle to um. And then I kind of got 107 00:06:21,520 --> 00:06:24,359 Speaker 1: to a place where I think, again, this kind of 108 00:06:24,360 --> 00:06:28,200 Speaker 1: recurring theme that's coming up over and over again is community. 109 00:06:28,520 --> 00:06:31,840 Speaker 1: I've seen in my life how family has been so 110 00:06:31,920 --> 00:06:39,800 Speaker 1: important to me, thriving through challenging circumstances and just having 111 00:06:39,839 --> 00:06:43,400 Speaker 1: like that shared history with people and people who have 112 00:06:43,520 --> 00:06:45,640 Speaker 1: kind of known you and seen you grow and evolve 113 00:06:46,120 --> 00:06:49,719 Speaker 1: over many years, and especially now, I think our our 114 00:06:49,800 --> 00:06:53,240 Speaker 1: society is so kind of isolated and fractured pandemic or 115 00:06:53,279 --> 00:06:59,120 Speaker 1: no pandemic, and so actually having like more community seemed 116 00:06:59,120 --> 00:07:02,000 Speaker 1: appealing to me for myself, but also for the girls 117 00:07:02,640 --> 00:07:05,800 Speaker 1: um that they would have teammates in life, and even 118 00:07:05,800 --> 00:07:09,560 Speaker 1: if they didn't get along, you know, they would still 119 00:07:09,600 --> 00:07:11,920 Speaker 1: be kind of working out those muscles and figuring out 120 00:07:12,280 --> 00:07:15,440 Speaker 1: how to compromise and how to be patient. That's a 121 00:07:15,600 --> 00:07:18,480 Speaker 1: great way to think about it, actually, because I'm really 122 00:07:18,520 --> 00:07:20,559 Speaker 1: close with I have one sibling, I have one brother, 123 00:07:20,640 --> 00:07:22,680 Speaker 1: and we're really really close and I've always just like 124 00:07:23,200 --> 00:07:27,600 Speaker 1: assumed that if I gave my son a sibling that 125 00:07:27,640 --> 00:07:29,760 Speaker 1: they would be really close, And I had to look 126 00:07:29,800 --> 00:07:32,040 Speaker 1: at it and be like, well, that's not a guarantee. 127 00:07:32,320 --> 00:07:33,960 Speaker 1: It's not a guarantee they're gonna like each other. It's 128 00:07:33,960 --> 00:07:35,840 Speaker 1: not a guarantee they're going to get along or there 129 00:07:36,080 --> 00:07:40,320 Speaker 1: that they will their whole lives. But even if they don't, 130 00:07:40,960 --> 00:07:44,840 Speaker 1: You're right, it still is learning lessons. They're working out 131 00:07:44,880 --> 00:07:47,440 Speaker 1: whatever they're here to work out, right, I mean what 132 00:07:47,560 --> 00:07:49,480 Speaker 1: I mean, look at our workplace. We have to be 133 00:07:50,440 --> 00:07:54,440 Speaker 1: great actors and artists, but really, let's be honest, like 134 00:07:54,600 --> 00:07:59,520 Speaker 1: a huge proportion of our skill as serious television actors 135 00:08:00,040 --> 00:08:05,080 Speaker 1: is about getting along with others absubolutely getting along with 136 00:08:05,160 --> 00:08:07,840 Speaker 1: personalities on day and days and at five am and 137 00:08:07,880 --> 00:08:11,080 Speaker 1: a trailer versus two am on a Friday night and 138 00:08:11,240 --> 00:08:13,880 Speaker 1: fifteen hours in when you've been in the rain all 139 00:08:13,960 --> 00:08:16,480 Speaker 1: day and you've been up with your child all night, 140 00:08:16,640 --> 00:08:18,520 Speaker 1: and then you're like showing up to work and you're 141 00:08:18,560 --> 00:08:21,400 Speaker 1: really fucking cranky. All of those things. A lot of 142 00:08:21,400 --> 00:08:24,920 Speaker 1: it has to do with character, and yes, character building. 143 00:08:26,320 --> 00:08:31,080 Speaker 1: I read that you became a trained doula before you 144 00:08:31,120 --> 00:08:34,880 Speaker 1: were having your own kids. Tell me about that. What 145 00:08:35,040 --> 00:08:39,040 Speaker 1: drew you to do that? UM? A few things, I 146 00:08:39,080 --> 00:08:42,520 Speaker 1: mean one of them was that my sister, UM, she 147 00:08:42,840 --> 00:08:46,360 Speaker 1: had a baby UM when we were pretty young, and 148 00:08:46,600 --> 00:08:48,480 Speaker 1: she didn't have a partner at the time, and so 149 00:08:48,559 --> 00:08:52,400 Speaker 1: I was her birth coach through that process. She's kind 150 00:08:52,400 --> 00:08:54,880 Speaker 1: of always like Marcia the beat of her own drum, 151 00:08:55,000 --> 00:08:57,760 Speaker 1: and she was like, cool, I'm gonna do a home birth. 152 00:08:59,240 --> 00:09:01,839 Speaker 1: And I was like what. I was like, horrid vibe, 153 00:09:02,040 --> 00:09:04,719 Speaker 1: you know. But then I started reading material by on 154 00:09:04,920 --> 00:09:07,520 Speaker 1: my Gaskin and and learning about it, and I was like, 155 00:09:07,559 --> 00:09:09,600 Speaker 1: this is kind of great. So she had a home 156 00:09:09,640 --> 00:09:13,200 Speaker 1: birth and I was her you know, accompaniment through that birth, 157 00:09:13,280 --> 00:09:18,080 Speaker 1: and I saw this way, yeah, yeah, I decided to 158 00:09:18,080 --> 00:09:20,600 Speaker 1: be a dula. And then I had my I had 159 00:09:20,600 --> 00:09:25,079 Speaker 1: three home births myself. I didn't know you had home birth. 160 00:09:25,280 --> 00:09:29,280 Speaker 1: I had three home births, so I yeah, And so 161 00:09:29,480 --> 00:09:32,560 Speaker 1: really went from I saw my sister, who was this 162 00:09:32,679 --> 00:09:37,080 Speaker 1: kind of you know, wild young girl transition. I mean, 163 00:09:37,080 --> 00:09:41,200 Speaker 1: the whole labor itself was so beautiful. We had like 164 00:09:41,320 --> 00:09:44,040 Speaker 1: meditative music on, and this girl we knew, who was 165 00:09:44,080 --> 00:09:47,160 Speaker 1: like a Ricky Master came over and like you put 166 00:09:47,160 --> 00:09:49,840 Speaker 1: her hands on her, and it like focused her. Was 167 00:09:49,880 --> 00:09:52,280 Speaker 1: it long? Was it a long labor? No? I think 168 00:09:52,320 --> 00:09:54,320 Speaker 1: it was like I want to say it was seven hours, 169 00:09:54,320 --> 00:09:58,200 Speaker 1: and then oh, good lord, that's a joke, right, But 170 00:09:58,280 --> 00:09:59,959 Speaker 1: that was the other thing. She was in the comfort 171 00:10:00,040 --> 00:10:02,000 Speaker 1: of our own home, so she was very relaxed and 172 00:10:02,040 --> 00:10:05,280 Speaker 1: comfortable and um. And again I'm going to do the 173 00:10:05,320 --> 00:10:08,880 Speaker 1: disclaimer here, and home birth is not for everyone. I'm 174 00:10:08,920 --> 00:10:11,920 Speaker 1: happy there are hospitals for people who need hospitals to 175 00:10:12,000 --> 00:10:14,240 Speaker 1: have their babies and who feel safer in a hospital 176 00:10:14,320 --> 00:10:17,800 Speaker 1: or more comfortable there. The point of home birth is 177 00:10:18,080 --> 00:10:22,079 Speaker 1: to give women who are candidates for it, that's right. 178 00:10:22,120 --> 00:10:26,280 Speaker 1: I've heard at length from home birth du Lahs that 179 00:10:26,360 --> 00:10:29,400 Speaker 1: like you actually even have to like sort of qualify 180 00:10:29,640 --> 00:10:33,320 Speaker 1: in a way that you're very low risk, that you know, 181 00:10:33,440 --> 00:10:36,760 Speaker 1: the pregnancy itself is very low risk, Like they're actually 182 00:10:36,800 --> 00:10:39,280 Speaker 1: all these things sort of have to check off to 183 00:10:39,360 --> 00:10:43,520 Speaker 1: even really entertain the idea of right, And I think 184 00:10:43,520 --> 00:10:46,480 Speaker 1: people don't realize that really the main job of the 185 00:10:46,520 --> 00:10:50,640 Speaker 1: midwife is to monitor you throughout your whole pregnancy and 186 00:10:50,720 --> 00:10:55,880 Speaker 1: make sure everything is typical. In most cases, everything is 187 00:10:55,920 --> 00:10:58,600 Speaker 1: typical because our bodies evolved for millions of years to 188 00:10:58,640 --> 00:11:00,560 Speaker 1: be very good at doing this thing, which is why 189 00:11:00,720 --> 00:11:03,800 Speaker 1: we have an overpopulation problem, right, right, you know what 190 00:11:03,800 --> 00:11:06,199 Speaker 1: I mean? We're good at it. Actually yeah, but in 191 00:11:06,240 --> 00:11:09,559 Speaker 1: some cases people might have like a different kind of pelvis, 192 00:11:09,600 --> 00:11:13,440 Speaker 1: and the midwife is supposed to check that out right 193 00:11:13,480 --> 00:11:16,840 Speaker 1: before we get into any sort of ship show exactly. 194 00:11:27,320 --> 00:11:31,600 Speaker 1: So with three pregnancies and three home birds, do you 195 00:11:31,679 --> 00:11:34,000 Speaker 1: have a favorite? Are you even allowed to say that? God? 196 00:11:34,200 --> 00:11:36,160 Speaker 1: I don't think I could say that, I know, right, 197 00:11:36,679 --> 00:11:42,480 Speaker 1: but do you? Because I do, well, no different, I 198 00:11:42,480 --> 00:11:45,600 Speaker 1: should say they're different. Mike Toddler's so hard right now, 199 00:11:45,640 --> 00:11:48,000 Speaker 1: like he's such a three manager and every single thing 200 00:11:48,080 --> 00:11:50,920 Speaker 1: is a negotiation. So you know, I'm just in it 201 00:11:50,920 --> 00:11:52,760 Speaker 1: with him, right. He just got big trouble yesterday for 202 00:11:52,840 --> 00:11:54,640 Speaker 1: hitting someone in the face with a stick, So we're 203 00:11:54,679 --> 00:11:59,000 Speaker 1: not like a great place. It's amazing that as a mother, 204 00:11:59,080 --> 00:12:02,160 Speaker 1: I feel like when I'm locked in those power struggle 205 00:12:02,240 --> 00:12:04,600 Speaker 1: moments where I'm like, oh my god, how are you 206 00:12:04,840 --> 00:12:09,960 Speaker 1: capable of arguing like an attorney and you're only a child? 207 00:12:12,040 --> 00:12:18,760 Speaker 1: And I can simultaneously me in like total frustration. But 208 00:12:18,840 --> 00:12:21,200 Speaker 1: there's this tiny little voice that's like you're gonna be 209 00:12:21,200 --> 00:12:23,840 Speaker 1: okay kid, Yeah, yeah, I feel the same way, like, 210 00:12:23,840 --> 00:12:26,360 Speaker 1: oh my god, this is going to make an exceptional adult. 211 00:12:26,480 --> 00:12:31,400 Speaker 1: But exactly, this is hell to tell me about the 212 00:12:31,880 --> 00:12:36,600 Speaker 1: labors and the pregnancies. How were they were they all different? 213 00:12:36,800 --> 00:12:41,000 Speaker 1: Were they all were their similarities? Okay? So I mean 214 00:12:41,440 --> 00:12:45,080 Speaker 1: I can't complain. They were pretty good. They were pretty good. 215 00:12:45,200 --> 00:12:47,920 Speaker 1: I had a really only time. It's important to say 216 00:12:47,960 --> 00:12:50,160 Speaker 1: these things. We have a lot of listening who are 217 00:12:50,200 --> 00:12:53,880 Speaker 1: pregnant or who want to get pregnant, or or thinking 218 00:12:53,880 --> 00:12:56,400 Speaker 1: about a second or third or fourth child, and I 219 00:12:56,440 --> 00:13:01,319 Speaker 1: think that we also highlight a ton of not so great. 220 00:13:02,240 --> 00:13:04,600 Speaker 1: So it's also really important to say when no, you 221 00:13:04,640 --> 00:13:08,800 Speaker 1: know what, I had three pregnancies and they were fucking awesome. Well, 222 00:13:08,880 --> 00:13:10,200 Speaker 1: and I do want to say that one of the 223 00:13:10,200 --> 00:13:13,920 Speaker 1: things that I was so frustrated with um historically, even 224 00:13:13,960 --> 00:13:16,640 Speaker 1: before you know Shonda Land, which is this very like 225 00:13:16,760 --> 00:13:21,320 Speaker 1: woman centric woman lad situation, before that, most TV writers 226 00:13:21,320 --> 00:13:26,680 Speaker 1: were dudes, right, And so the storytelling, and again it's 227 00:13:26,679 --> 00:13:32,120 Speaker 1: not just storytelling on television, it's cultural storytelling, was the 228 00:13:32,520 --> 00:13:36,920 Speaker 1: kind of narrative through line that was designed to terrorize 229 00:13:36,920 --> 00:13:42,000 Speaker 1: women and make them fearful of themselves. Was that pregnancy 230 00:13:42,080 --> 00:13:45,839 Speaker 1: and labor are this like pathology. Again, it was like 231 00:13:46,000 --> 00:13:49,080 Speaker 1: doctors are in med school, they're learning about pathologies, and 232 00:13:49,120 --> 00:13:51,640 Speaker 1: so if you put labor and birth into that category, 233 00:13:52,040 --> 00:13:54,480 Speaker 1: you think it's an illness. It's not an illness. It's 234 00:13:54,520 --> 00:13:57,800 Speaker 1: a beautiful, miraculous human function that again we evolved to 235 00:13:57,920 --> 00:14:01,199 Speaker 1: do and are very powerful and good. And so they 236 00:14:01,240 --> 00:14:05,440 Speaker 1: pathologize it, and the narrative is that it's this emergency, 237 00:14:05,800 --> 00:14:08,880 Speaker 1: it's terrible, we have to be rescued from it. There's 238 00:14:08,880 --> 00:14:11,520 Speaker 1: someone in the grocery store. They drop a jar of 239 00:14:11,520 --> 00:14:14,880 Speaker 1: pickles and shatters. They start screaming, the water breaks, the 240 00:14:15,080 --> 00:14:16,839 Speaker 1: rush to the hospital as though they've been in a 241 00:14:16,920 --> 00:14:20,840 Speaker 1: car accident. It's just so traumatic. It's so traumatic, and 242 00:14:20,840 --> 00:14:23,680 Speaker 1: then they're rescued by these like male doctors in white 243 00:14:23,800 --> 00:14:26,240 Speaker 1: and thank god those men were there, because I don't 244 00:14:26,280 --> 00:14:27,760 Speaker 1: know how I would have had a baby with just 245 00:14:27,880 --> 00:14:32,080 Speaker 1: woman and my vagina, but you could. But you could, 246 00:14:32,200 --> 00:14:36,040 Speaker 1: because that's how you do it. Yeah. I was just 247 00:14:36,080 --> 00:14:38,160 Speaker 1: having this conversation with my friend who's do like any day, 248 00:14:38,160 --> 00:14:40,520 Speaker 1: and she was like freaking out because her dula has 249 00:14:40,560 --> 00:14:42,520 Speaker 1: like six people do at the same time, and she's 250 00:14:42,520 --> 00:14:44,280 Speaker 1: not gonna like, can't you Will she be there? Will 251 00:14:44,320 --> 00:14:45,760 Speaker 1: she not? Will she be there with? And I said, 252 00:14:45,760 --> 00:14:49,840 Speaker 1: I got news for you. It doesn't really matter. I said, 253 00:14:50,320 --> 00:14:52,760 Speaker 1: I know you might want and picture this thing a 254 00:14:52,760 --> 00:14:54,560 Speaker 1: certain way with certain people in the room, But the 255 00:14:54,560 --> 00:14:57,520 Speaker 1: good news is you're enough, like you're going to get 256 00:14:57,560 --> 00:14:59,560 Speaker 1: your own self through this, and your baby is gonna 257 00:14:59,760 --> 00:15:02,840 Speaker 1: be here safely. And we've been doing this since like 258 00:15:02,880 --> 00:15:05,720 Speaker 1: the beginning of time. There's there's really no option. You 259 00:15:05,800 --> 00:15:10,160 Speaker 1: kind of get to like transition. Yeah, you're like, and 260 00:15:10,240 --> 00:15:12,280 Speaker 1: I think we all have that moment at transition where 261 00:15:12,280 --> 00:15:14,840 Speaker 1: we're like, I've changed my mind. I don't think I 262 00:15:14,840 --> 00:15:21,000 Speaker 1: would like to do this. So okay, your labors, um, 263 00:15:21,040 --> 00:15:25,240 Speaker 1: I can't believe you had. Is it non medicated or unmedicated? Yeah? No, 264 00:15:25,240 --> 00:15:29,360 Speaker 1: no medication. But listen, though, this is kind of cool, 265 00:15:30,040 --> 00:15:36,200 Speaker 1: tell me tell me well. One of the things that 266 00:15:36,280 --> 00:15:41,640 Speaker 1: happened by studying Midwiffrey and studying Doulah stuff was I 267 00:15:41,680 --> 00:15:44,320 Speaker 1: started learning about the human body and the human mind 268 00:15:44,320 --> 00:15:47,800 Speaker 1: and the connection right and so so I was meditating 269 00:15:47,840 --> 00:15:51,120 Speaker 1: throughout my pregnancy and a lot of it was centered 270 00:15:51,200 --> 00:15:56,600 Speaker 1: on again deep programming this idea that the discomfort from 271 00:15:56,680 --> 00:16:00,480 Speaker 1: labor is bad, bad, that this is a pology and 272 00:16:00,480 --> 00:16:04,240 Speaker 1: you're getting injured. That's not what's happening. You're in discomfort. 273 00:16:04,720 --> 00:16:06,960 Speaker 1: That's true. I'm not going to take away from that, 274 00:16:07,320 --> 00:16:11,280 Speaker 1: but it's not that discomfort is not a sign that like, 275 00:16:11,320 --> 00:16:14,840 Speaker 1: oh my femur is broken, like it's progressing. Right. My 276 00:16:14,920 --> 00:16:17,360 Speaker 1: Dula would always say to me, like one more contraction 277 00:16:17,520 --> 00:16:19,560 Speaker 1: is like, it's not a bad thing. It's one step 278 00:16:19,600 --> 00:16:23,040 Speaker 1: closer to meeting your baby, you know, even the languaging 279 00:16:23,080 --> 00:16:25,000 Speaker 1: around it. I mean, I'm a Gaskin who talks a 280 00:16:25,040 --> 00:16:27,080 Speaker 1: lot about it. It doesn't want to call it contractions 281 00:16:27,080 --> 00:16:29,240 Speaker 1: because she's like the word contraction makes you tense up. 282 00:16:29,840 --> 00:16:35,560 Speaker 1: She calls the rushes beautiful. Right, imagery is like this 283 00:16:35,760 --> 00:16:39,360 Speaker 1: wave kind of coming over you and like, you know, 284 00:16:39,520 --> 00:16:43,640 Speaker 1: opening your cervix so your baby can come out. Dude, 285 00:16:43,720 --> 00:16:45,720 Speaker 1: if I have another baby, which I am not, I 286 00:16:45,760 --> 00:16:49,040 Speaker 1: would very much like to hire you as I love 287 00:16:49,080 --> 00:16:52,160 Speaker 1: my Duelo. She's been on this twice and I'm obsessed 288 00:16:52,200 --> 00:16:55,680 Speaker 1: with her. But maybe you can both do it. What 289 00:16:55,880 --> 00:17:00,920 Speaker 1: made you retire your Duela straps, I don't know, as 290 00:17:01,080 --> 00:17:03,720 Speaker 1: exhaust was it when you were like, and now I'm 291 00:17:03,760 --> 00:17:06,400 Speaker 1: working in acting job eight million hours a day. Yeah, 292 00:17:06,520 --> 00:17:08,840 Speaker 1: kind of. I went down to the farm to study 293 00:17:08,920 --> 00:17:14,920 Speaker 1: with an Ame Gaskins. Yeah. Yeah, to the farm, you guys. 294 00:17:14,960 --> 00:17:18,080 Speaker 1: For everyone listening, I had a Megas Skin wrote a book. 295 00:17:18,160 --> 00:17:20,760 Speaker 1: It's called I have it. What is it called again, 296 00:17:21,200 --> 00:17:24,920 Speaker 1: Amazed Guy to Childbirth? I'd Amazed Guide to Childbirth. When 297 00:17:24,960 --> 00:17:27,960 Speaker 1: you open the book, is it from the seventies? The 298 00:17:27,960 --> 00:17:31,879 Speaker 1: book seventies books? YEA spiritualman Wifery was her first, like 299 00:17:32,040 --> 00:17:34,439 Speaker 1: the first version of it. And in that she's like 300 00:17:34,480 --> 00:17:37,640 Speaker 1: and then you get the rushes and it's super groovy, man. Yeah, 301 00:17:37,680 --> 00:17:41,320 Speaker 1: and you're seeing pictures of babies coming out of vagina's 302 00:17:41,400 --> 00:17:43,199 Speaker 1: and there's just a lot of bush and you're like, 303 00:17:43,320 --> 00:17:48,760 Speaker 1: this is so retro everywhere boobs and like lower children 304 00:17:49,320 --> 00:17:52,400 Speaker 1: then I'll have these long beards. Yeah. And she had 305 00:17:52,680 --> 00:17:56,680 Speaker 1: a farm where she would train midwives and people could 306 00:17:56,760 --> 00:18:02,000 Speaker 1: go there and do like fully this amazing home birth style. 307 00:18:02,040 --> 00:18:05,000 Speaker 1: I don't know what her style. And yeah, the farm 308 00:18:05,080 --> 00:18:11,800 Speaker 1: was actually the longest functioning commune in like American history. 309 00:18:11,880 --> 00:18:16,119 Speaker 1: It started in the seventies. Her husband and partner was 310 00:18:16,280 --> 00:18:19,480 Speaker 1: like a professor from Berkeley and the whole caravan of 311 00:18:19,720 --> 00:18:22,399 Speaker 1: school buses. I don't know if you remember that be 312 00:18:23,080 --> 00:18:27,800 Speaker 1: heaven sound. And so it's this whole thing of like 313 00:18:27,880 --> 00:18:31,760 Speaker 1: trying to like unplug and take back, you know, their 314 00:18:31,800 --> 00:18:35,640 Speaker 1: own economy and and have women having their own babies 315 00:18:35,680 --> 00:18:37,879 Speaker 1: because at the time, and I just talked about this recently, 316 00:18:37,920 --> 00:18:40,880 Speaker 1: but at the time, women were taken into hospitals and 317 00:18:41,080 --> 00:18:42,720 Speaker 1: men weren't allowed to go with them so they'd be 318 00:18:42,760 --> 00:18:48,560 Speaker 1: all alone. They were put into like Twilight. Yeah. My 319 00:18:48,680 --> 00:18:52,919 Speaker 1: husband's grandmother literally said I was put out under amnesia 320 00:18:52,960 --> 00:18:55,160 Speaker 1: with both of my kids and then woke up like 321 00:18:55,320 --> 00:18:59,720 Speaker 1: and met them. Which why do I let's define trauma 322 00:19:00,920 --> 00:19:07,119 Speaker 1: like like, how can you possibly process what just happened 323 00:19:07,200 --> 00:19:12,280 Speaker 1: to you when you were unconscious? You don't know? Yeah, 324 00:19:12,440 --> 00:19:16,000 Speaker 1: I mean that sounds absolutely horrifying, horrifying to me. It 325 00:19:16,040 --> 00:19:20,320 Speaker 1: reminds me of like the clockwork Orange, like what's happening? Like, guys, 326 00:19:20,800 --> 00:19:23,719 Speaker 1: this is so you actually went to the farm and 327 00:19:23,800 --> 00:19:27,720 Speaker 1: trained there. Yeah, and that was super great. I didn't 328 00:19:27,760 --> 00:19:30,560 Speaker 1: know like how deep it was, and I'm so here 329 00:19:30,600 --> 00:19:32,639 Speaker 1: for it. It was pretty great. I mean because I 330 00:19:32,680 --> 00:19:36,040 Speaker 1: started acting like pretty young, but I wasn't necessarily married 331 00:19:36,080 --> 00:19:38,760 Speaker 1: to it as like the whole thing I was going 332 00:19:38,800 --> 00:19:41,119 Speaker 1: to do in my life at that time. I was 333 00:19:41,160 --> 00:19:45,440 Speaker 1: doing it primarily to pay tuition for school, and then 334 00:19:45,480 --> 00:19:48,000 Speaker 1: it kind of became this passion and this thing that 335 00:19:48,040 --> 00:19:50,320 Speaker 1: I was loved and that got me into flow. But 336 00:19:50,600 --> 00:19:53,480 Speaker 1: for me, acting is where I very easily and quickly 337 00:19:53,520 --> 00:19:57,960 Speaker 1: find flow. I'm so grateful for this path because it's 338 00:19:58,000 --> 00:20:00,600 Speaker 1: so electric and it's so kind of did and you 339 00:20:00,640 --> 00:20:04,760 Speaker 1: get to experience lives and connect with other actors and 340 00:20:04,840 --> 00:20:08,000 Speaker 1: other lives and souls, and it can be so beautiful 341 00:20:08,160 --> 00:20:12,560 Speaker 1: and powerful. But the thing is flow. The thing is 342 00:20:12,600 --> 00:20:17,600 Speaker 1: not acting or entertainment industry, right, I totally agree. Yeah, 343 00:20:17,720 --> 00:20:21,240 Speaker 1: So you can find flow wherever you are, yeah, right, 344 00:20:21,480 --> 00:20:26,280 Speaker 1: And I think midwin free and childbirths, birth God, you 345 00:20:26,359 --> 00:20:30,200 Speaker 1: can find flow there, right. Yeah. And you're you're giving 346 00:20:30,200 --> 00:20:32,560 Speaker 1: me this vibe of like, Okay, so you've always really 347 00:20:33,560 --> 00:20:41,159 Speaker 1: been into birth, labor, pregnancy autonomy, like family, women, your sisters, 348 00:20:41,240 --> 00:20:45,480 Speaker 1: like surrounded by all this. Did you experience any sort 349 00:20:45,520 --> 00:20:48,800 Speaker 1: of postpartum where you were like, oh, ship, this is 350 00:20:50,000 --> 00:20:53,320 Speaker 1: not what I thought it was going to be, Or 351 00:20:53,840 --> 00:20:57,040 Speaker 1: any sadness or blues or depression or like wake up 352 00:20:57,080 --> 00:21:02,360 Speaker 1: calls anything like that. Like with with with having my kids, yeah, um, okay, God, 353 00:21:02,400 --> 00:21:04,600 Speaker 1: they were all so different and at such different times 354 00:21:04,600 --> 00:21:10,919 Speaker 1: in my life. I did not have significant depression. And 355 00:21:10,960 --> 00:21:14,040 Speaker 1: some of that is probably you know, just roll of 356 00:21:14,119 --> 00:21:19,320 Speaker 1: the dice, luck and uh and whatever my genetic predisposition is, 357 00:21:19,800 --> 00:21:22,760 Speaker 1: and some of it, Let's be honest. I was back 358 00:21:22,920 --> 00:21:27,280 Speaker 1: on set within weeks every single time I was on 359 00:21:27,320 --> 00:21:30,000 Speaker 1: private practice. When I had Eliza, I think I was 360 00:21:30,040 --> 00:21:33,840 Speaker 1: back to work six weeks, and then with Pippa, I 361 00:21:33,920 --> 00:21:38,920 Speaker 1: was back to work four weeks later. No way, and 362 00:21:39,000 --> 00:21:41,639 Speaker 1: Pippa maybe it was a little longer because it was 363 00:21:41,680 --> 00:21:44,560 Speaker 1: over the Christmas break with it wasn't the regular hiatus 364 00:21:45,359 --> 00:21:48,359 Speaker 1: and and so with Pippa was not only like birth, 365 00:21:48,520 --> 00:21:51,520 Speaker 1: but it was like adjusting to having a child with 366 00:21:51,560 --> 00:21:56,280 Speaker 1: significant special needs. Speaking about Pippa, her real name is Paloma. Yes, 367 00:21:56,520 --> 00:22:01,480 Speaker 1: how did you choose that beautiful name? Well, let's see 368 00:22:01,680 --> 00:22:04,960 Speaker 1: the family part of it. I mean, Eliza Giles. That's 369 00:22:05,160 --> 00:22:09,200 Speaker 1: great English English. I love it so English, um and 370 00:22:09,200 --> 00:22:11,680 Speaker 1: that and both of us have English uh in our 371 00:22:11,720 --> 00:22:15,720 Speaker 1: in our backgrounds. Um. But I also um half Italian 372 00:22:15,760 --> 00:22:19,120 Speaker 1: and my father was raised in Argentina and and so 373 00:22:19,240 --> 00:22:24,879 Speaker 1: that's also there and Paloma means dove, and yeah, and 374 00:22:24,960 --> 00:22:27,920 Speaker 1: so the idea of this kind of like holy spirit, 375 00:22:28,080 --> 00:22:34,119 Speaker 1: peaceful little dove really appealed to us. Oh my gosh, 376 00:22:34,119 --> 00:22:37,560 Speaker 1: it's it's absolutely gorgeous. How did you communicate to Eliza 377 00:22:37,600 --> 00:22:40,520 Speaker 1: and loosend to that Pippa had down syndrome. So when 378 00:22:40,680 --> 00:22:45,120 Speaker 1: Pippa was born, Eliza was how old Eliza was four 379 00:22:45,119 --> 00:22:50,360 Speaker 1: and a half. Oh, so she was pretty young. Mostly 380 00:22:50,440 --> 00:22:53,760 Speaker 1: we just we're excited about her having a sister, and 381 00:22:53,760 --> 00:22:55,760 Speaker 1: then we did say that she would stay a baby 382 00:22:55,800 --> 00:22:58,440 Speaker 1: for a little longer. It's kind of the way we 383 00:22:58,560 --> 00:23:02,199 Speaker 1: articulated it, and the way that's true. I mean, Pippa 384 00:23:02,520 --> 00:23:04,800 Speaker 1: is hitting all of her milestones. She's just hitting them 385 00:23:04,880 --> 00:23:08,199 Speaker 1: later than other kids. But she jumps on the trampoline, 386 00:23:08,240 --> 00:23:10,639 Speaker 1: and she has her favorite songs, and she sings like 387 00:23:10,720 --> 00:23:14,800 Speaker 1: Leonard Cohen and write dances and on the tricycle, and 388 00:23:14,960 --> 00:23:17,480 Speaker 1: like she does all of the things that a typical 389 00:23:17,560 --> 00:23:19,200 Speaker 1: kid does, she just did them a little bit later. 390 00:23:19,520 --> 00:23:24,000 Speaker 1: I want to say, I have not arrived at knowing 391 00:23:24,920 --> 00:23:29,560 Speaker 1: how to engage with the conversation about disability yet and 392 00:23:29,640 --> 00:23:33,000 Speaker 1: about the specifics of my family and the topic in general. 393 00:23:33,320 --> 00:23:35,920 Speaker 1: I am in a learning process and I will continue 394 00:23:35,920 --> 00:23:37,320 Speaker 1: to be in that learning process for the rest of 395 00:23:37,320 --> 00:23:40,600 Speaker 1: my life. Um And sometimes I will make mistakes and 396 00:23:40,720 --> 00:23:44,040 Speaker 1: I will try to learn about them and be accountable 397 00:23:44,080 --> 00:23:46,480 Speaker 1: and do better next time. But I will never have arrived. 398 00:23:47,480 --> 00:23:50,480 Speaker 1: And I think even the way I explained it to 399 00:23:50,520 --> 00:23:54,000 Speaker 1: Eliza when she was little was really from a place 400 00:23:54,119 --> 00:23:58,919 Speaker 1: of my own fear about the difference in what I 401 00:23:59,040 --> 00:24:02,000 Speaker 1: expected her relationship with her sister to be and what 402 00:24:02,400 --> 00:24:05,239 Speaker 1: I now thought it would be. I still had this 403 00:24:05,280 --> 00:24:09,159 Speaker 1: idea that, like, oh, this is I have to explain 404 00:24:09,200 --> 00:24:15,080 Speaker 1: to her the difference between Pippa and other siblings with Lucinda. 405 00:24:15,440 --> 00:24:20,000 Speaker 1: With Lucinda, she's just experiencing Pippa. You know. They like 406 00:24:20,280 --> 00:24:23,520 Speaker 1: steal each other's toys and push each other and give 407 00:24:23,560 --> 00:24:25,520 Speaker 1: it to the food and hugs and kisses, and there's 408 00:24:25,600 --> 00:24:31,040 Speaker 1: no like, let me tell you about her genetics. It's 409 00:24:31,119 --> 00:24:36,120 Speaker 1: like bears and they have their relationship and it's specific. 410 00:24:36,720 --> 00:24:39,280 Speaker 1: And so I think maybe I would have been less 411 00:24:40,160 --> 00:24:45,159 Speaker 1: precious and like serious about explaining it to Eliza, and 412 00:24:45,200 --> 00:24:49,840 Speaker 1: I would have let her discover her more like a 413 00:24:49,880 --> 00:24:53,720 Speaker 1: teachable moment conversation, she wouldn't have known what a typical 414 00:24:53,760 --> 00:24:56,080 Speaker 1: sibling would have been like either, So why did I 415 00:24:56,080 --> 00:24:59,840 Speaker 1: feel the need to make a distinction there? Yeah, but 416 00:25:00,000 --> 00:25:01,919 Speaker 1: like you said, and you preface so well, it's like 417 00:25:01,960 --> 00:25:04,360 Speaker 1: we're learning. You know you're learning, And now you get 418 00:25:04,400 --> 00:25:08,640 Speaker 1: another shot, which brings me to this essay. You pen 419 00:25:08,720 --> 00:25:11,760 Speaker 1: this powerful essay in honor of Down Syndrome Awareness Month, 420 00:25:11,920 --> 00:25:14,199 Speaker 1: where you talk a lot that equity is more of 421 00:25:14,200 --> 00:25:17,679 Speaker 1: a useful word than equality. Can you talk about that 422 00:25:17,720 --> 00:25:20,320 Speaker 1: distinction and why you thought why it's important to make 423 00:25:20,359 --> 00:25:23,960 Speaker 1: that distinction. Yeah, and then we can decide how deep 424 00:25:24,000 --> 00:25:25,560 Speaker 1: we're going to go with this. I think one way 425 00:25:25,560 --> 00:25:28,240 Speaker 1: I like to think of it is equal is what 426 00:25:28,320 --> 00:25:35,200 Speaker 1: we are inherently in terms of our value and our dignity. 427 00:25:35,359 --> 00:25:41,880 Speaker 1: We are all equal. Equity is how we get there, right, 428 00:25:42,920 --> 00:25:47,639 Speaker 1: because equal does not mean identical, and that, I think 429 00:25:47,840 --> 00:25:50,960 Speaker 1: is the big kind of linguistic gas light that we've 430 00:25:51,000 --> 00:25:54,640 Speaker 1: been dealing with as a culture. We've been told that 431 00:25:55,200 --> 00:25:57,919 Speaker 1: equal is identical, and that's not the case, both in 432 00:25:58,000 --> 00:26:01,600 Speaker 1: terms of our disability, in terms of our abilities and disabilities, 433 00:26:01,720 --> 00:26:05,760 Speaker 1: but also the larger conversation in terms of the resources 434 00:26:05,760 --> 00:26:08,280 Speaker 1: that we started out with. Right, what hand you were 435 00:26:08,320 --> 00:26:10,440 Speaker 1: dealt with when you were born, like what you came 436 00:26:10,680 --> 00:26:14,800 Speaker 1: into the yeah, and what kind of economic situation you're 437 00:26:14,800 --> 00:26:18,359 Speaker 1: trying into, and what resources you had access to to 438 00:26:18,480 --> 00:26:20,920 Speaker 1: get you to equals. Some people need a dollar, some 439 00:26:20,920 --> 00:26:24,840 Speaker 1: people need ten. Right, As a culture and as a society, 440 00:26:25,119 --> 00:26:26,879 Speaker 1: we kind of need to look at our values and 441 00:26:26,920 --> 00:26:31,160 Speaker 1: decide what this whole equality conversation is about. Are we 442 00:26:31,200 --> 00:26:37,560 Speaker 1: looking for creating a society where everyone's inherent dignity is 443 00:26:37,600 --> 00:26:40,720 Speaker 1: supported or are we looking for and this is another 444 00:26:40,760 --> 00:26:44,680 Speaker 1: gas light, a society where people have the quote freedom 445 00:26:45,200 --> 00:26:52,800 Speaker 1: to get h equity if they can, right, and the 446 00:26:52,960 --> 00:26:57,639 Speaker 1: freedom essentially it's not about dignity anymore. It becomes you 447 00:26:57,680 --> 00:27:02,520 Speaker 1: have the freedom to acquire and a mass wealth, and 448 00:27:02,600 --> 00:27:06,160 Speaker 1: through that acquired an a mass wealth, maybe you can 449 00:27:06,160 --> 00:27:10,399 Speaker 1: create some dignity for yourself. Right, A pretty deep question 450 00:27:10,520 --> 00:27:12,959 Speaker 1: about how do we want to structure the whole concept 451 00:27:13,240 --> 00:27:18,760 Speaker 1: of our culture. What does each child need to unfold 452 00:27:20,080 --> 00:27:23,240 Speaker 1: into the person that they are and have the potential 453 00:27:23,280 --> 00:27:26,760 Speaker 1: to be calm and have the most joy and the 454 00:27:26,840 --> 00:27:30,360 Speaker 1: most fulfillment and the most connection and the most flow 455 00:27:31,040 --> 00:27:34,280 Speaker 1: in life. My God, your three daughters are so lucky 456 00:27:34,359 --> 00:27:38,359 Speaker 1: that you're there. What organizations do you go to for 457 00:27:38,480 --> 00:27:42,919 Speaker 1: support to learn more about Down syndrome? Yeah, Um, the 458 00:27:43,000 --> 00:27:45,359 Speaker 1: first one that everybody told me about when Pippa was 459 00:27:45,400 --> 00:27:48,280 Speaker 1: born was Club twenty one and it's um kind of 460 00:27:48,320 --> 00:27:51,399 Speaker 1: a hangout center for families. People with Down syndrome have 461 00:27:51,440 --> 00:27:54,240 Speaker 1: a different learning profile, So there's like reading and writing 462 00:27:54,280 --> 00:27:58,560 Speaker 1: classes that are specifically designed for a visual learning profile. 463 00:27:58,600 --> 00:28:02,520 Speaker 1: So like Pippa is four and she can already read 464 00:28:03,160 --> 00:28:06,080 Speaker 1: Eliza couldn't read it four, But Pippa has a different 465 00:28:06,119 --> 00:28:09,160 Speaker 1: learning profile, so she's visual and so she can't read 466 00:28:09,200 --> 00:28:11,560 Speaker 1: like a whole book, but she can read simple words. 467 00:28:11,680 --> 00:28:16,080 Speaker 1: She knows all her letters, both in sign language and visually, 468 00:28:16,200 --> 00:28:19,800 Speaker 1: and she loves playing with the alphabet and and so anyway, 469 00:28:19,800 --> 00:28:21,879 Speaker 1: they teach classes there and they also just have like 470 00:28:21,920 --> 00:28:24,520 Speaker 1: a hangout room for the one to three kids where 471 00:28:24,520 --> 00:28:27,719 Speaker 1: they just and there's lots of families that are like, 472 00:28:28,040 --> 00:28:30,359 Speaker 1: what's going on with you and what doctor have you 473 00:28:30,480 --> 00:28:32,960 Speaker 1: talked to? And what kind of food do you give 474 00:28:33,000 --> 00:28:36,440 Speaker 1: your kid um if they have delayed tooth eruption. It's 475 00:28:36,480 --> 00:28:41,440 Speaker 1: community and then Global Down Syndrome Foundation, the c Center 476 00:28:41,800 --> 00:28:46,600 Speaker 1: does uh. They fundraise and then they use the money 477 00:28:46,640 --> 00:28:51,280 Speaker 1: to do research on medical things and learning profile things 478 00:28:51,360 --> 00:28:54,800 Speaker 1: and life supporting things that support people with Down syndrome. 479 00:28:54,880 --> 00:29:00,760 Speaker 1: Because the numbers are so small now, pharmaceutical companies don't 480 00:29:00,800 --> 00:29:03,560 Speaker 1: really fund the research because it doesn't have enough profit 481 00:29:03,600 --> 00:29:07,360 Speaker 1: for them. And so anyway, in terms of funding, the 482 00:29:07,520 --> 00:29:12,840 Speaker 1: Global Down Syndrome Foundation funds research and they've done incredible 483 00:29:12,840 --> 00:29:16,040 Speaker 1: things recently to find out that essentially Down syndrome operates 484 00:29:16,040 --> 00:29:18,960 Speaker 1: like an autoimmune disorder, and so some of the cognitive 485 00:29:18,960 --> 00:29:23,440 Speaker 1: delay that's associated with Down syndrome is actually a combination 486 00:29:23,560 --> 00:29:27,080 Speaker 1: of hypothyroid, which can be medicated, and so when you 487 00:29:27,080 --> 00:29:30,160 Speaker 1: give hyroid medication, the cognition improves and a lot of 488 00:29:30,600 --> 00:29:35,160 Speaker 1: us and then also this autoimmune situation that's going on 489 00:29:35,200 --> 00:29:39,040 Speaker 1: in the viral branch of immune system that um, when 490 00:29:39,040 --> 00:29:42,040 Speaker 1: the immune system is flaring, it can start to destroy neurons. 491 00:29:42,480 --> 00:29:47,400 Speaker 1: Holy ship on the side, hustle, can you just do 492 00:29:47,520 --> 00:29:50,960 Speaker 1: like a mommy and me for um or like I'm 493 00:29:50,960 --> 00:30:02,600 Speaker 1: working on it. So Dr Amelia Shephard was pregnant on 494 00:30:02,600 --> 00:30:05,680 Speaker 1: private practice and Gray's Anatomy. Two out of your three 495 00:30:05,680 --> 00:30:08,760 Speaker 1: pregnancies were written into your character storyline is that correct? 496 00:30:09,520 --> 00:30:12,760 Speaker 1: Two were written in yeeah, amazing. Mine was too. How 497 00:30:12,800 --> 00:30:14,400 Speaker 1: did you find that out? Did you find that out 498 00:30:14,400 --> 00:30:16,680 Speaker 1: at a table read? Or did Shanna tell you beforehand? 499 00:30:17,200 --> 00:30:19,640 Speaker 1: They talked to me beforehand about it. I did not 500 00:30:19,840 --> 00:30:24,400 Speaker 1: know what would be happening with my Mary. Yeah, that 501 00:30:24,520 --> 00:30:28,479 Speaker 1: was like pretty heinous. We did you simulate breastfeeding too? 502 00:30:28,840 --> 00:30:33,600 Speaker 1: I simulated labor. The baby didn't have a brain, right 503 00:30:33,840 --> 00:30:36,960 Speaker 1: the baby, Yeah, head Anna's definitely and so I never 504 00:30:37,000 --> 00:30:39,840 Speaker 1: got to breastfee that baby. But it was a pretty 505 00:30:39,840 --> 00:30:44,480 Speaker 1: hard day. And it was also again like behind the scenes, 506 00:30:44,480 --> 00:30:47,400 Speaker 1: Shanna Lynne super supportive and it's awesome for babies, but 507 00:30:47,480 --> 00:30:50,640 Speaker 1: in front of the scenes usually something terrible, and like 508 00:30:51,320 --> 00:30:55,960 Speaker 1: we're on a drama. We're on dramas. We're on Quinn's 509 00:30:56,000 --> 00:31:00,800 Speaker 1: baby chained to a mattress in a base sment while 510 00:31:00,800 --> 00:31:03,360 Speaker 1: I've been kidnapped in a wedding dress. They put me 511 00:31:03,400 --> 00:31:08,560 Speaker 1: under aund aesthesia. Yeah, we're like a woman giving birth 512 00:31:08,560 --> 00:31:12,120 Speaker 1: in the seventies. Yeah, exactly. And I remember Carrie Washington 513 00:31:12,200 --> 00:31:15,160 Speaker 1: in between like every take, she was pregnant with both 514 00:31:15,200 --> 00:31:18,479 Speaker 1: of her babies on Scandal, but she Olivia Pope wasn't pregnant, 515 00:31:18,480 --> 00:31:20,200 Speaker 1: but we would keep running over to her belly and 516 00:31:20,200 --> 00:31:22,560 Speaker 1: be like, this is just pretend. It's just pretend. Don't 517 00:31:22,560 --> 00:31:25,760 Speaker 1: freak out in there. We're okay, like everything safe, Mommy's 518 00:31:25,800 --> 00:31:29,960 Speaker 1: joking around. Well, and that was it. That was my 519 00:31:30,000 --> 00:31:32,760 Speaker 1: biggest concern was I was like reading all the books 520 00:31:32,800 --> 00:31:37,719 Speaker 1: that are like whatever old baby also, and I was like, 521 00:31:37,800 --> 00:31:42,200 Speaker 1: this is a horror show. I asked my therapist that 522 00:31:42,240 --> 00:31:46,040 Speaker 1: because I had hairy natal depression and anxiety this pregnancy, 523 00:31:46,160 --> 00:31:48,560 Speaker 1: and I was not great. We're also in a pandemic. 524 00:31:49,440 --> 00:31:52,080 Speaker 1: I was struggling really badly, and my daughter's like the 525 00:31:52,160 --> 00:31:55,520 Speaker 1: chilliest baby and very smiley. And I asked my therapist 526 00:31:55,600 --> 00:31:58,600 Speaker 1: and I was like, am I fucking at my kid 527 00:31:58,680 --> 00:32:01,000 Speaker 1: that I'm really struggle me with his pregnancy? And she 528 00:32:01,080 --> 00:32:04,040 Speaker 1: was like, I think that's like in war torn countries, 529 00:32:04,120 --> 00:32:06,760 Speaker 1: like if bombs were going off and you were like 530 00:32:06,880 --> 00:32:09,040 Speaker 1: really really scared for your life. But I think you're okay. 531 00:32:09,080 --> 00:32:12,840 Speaker 1: But I really wonder if you're an actor who's scared 532 00:32:13,000 --> 00:32:15,240 Speaker 1: and putting yourself through that trauma, Like I don't even know, 533 00:32:15,280 --> 00:32:17,680 Speaker 1: I don't want to, we probably don't want to know 534 00:32:17,800 --> 00:32:21,800 Speaker 1: where I come from myself as I'm like, well, maybe 535 00:32:21,840 --> 00:32:25,680 Speaker 1: they will be prepared if there is a war. Their 536 00:32:25,760 --> 00:32:31,960 Speaker 1: nervous system is totally tuned to handle that shit. Let's see, 537 00:32:32,160 --> 00:32:34,840 Speaker 1: we've talked about that. You have a village. Bestow your 538 00:32:34,880 --> 00:32:37,400 Speaker 1: knowledge on me, your further head on this journey than 539 00:32:37,440 --> 00:32:40,760 Speaker 1: I am. What do you do to unwind or recharge? 540 00:32:42,200 --> 00:32:46,760 Speaker 1: I mean, oh gosh, it changes meditation and prayer if 541 00:32:46,800 --> 00:32:49,040 Speaker 1: that is the way you do it for me at 542 00:32:49,080 --> 00:32:55,960 Speaker 1: this point, it's honestly whenever I can feel disregulation happening 543 00:32:56,440 --> 00:32:58,720 Speaker 1: in my nervous system. So at two thirty in the morning, 544 00:32:58,840 --> 00:33:03,200 Speaker 1: when my sixteen month old and my four and a 545 00:33:03,240 --> 00:33:05,600 Speaker 1: half year old have both woken up and come into 546 00:33:05,680 --> 00:33:08,920 Speaker 1: my bed and are fighting over which one of them 547 00:33:08,960 --> 00:33:12,640 Speaker 1: I will put back to sleep first, and like clawing 548 00:33:12,760 --> 00:33:16,600 Speaker 1: at my body, I'm meditating. And so I'm holding literally 549 00:33:16,840 --> 00:33:18,760 Speaker 1: one in one arm and one in the other arm, 550 00:33:18,800 --> 00:33:21,400 Speaker 1: and I'm swaying back and forth, and I'm meditating at 551 00:33:21,440 --> 00:33:25,160 Speaker 1: that time because that isn't going to keep me calm 552 00:33:25,280 --> 00:33:32,840 Speaker 1: and loving them and sane. Um. Yoga is a big piece. 553 00:33:32,840 --> 00:33:35,520 Speaker 1: Although I have to go easy on myself right now, 554 00:33:35,560 --> 00:33:38,240 Speaker 1: having a full austin and practice like a physical practice 555 00:33:38,360 --> 00:33:40,800 Speaker 1: is not always an option when you're an exhausted mom. 556 00:33:40,920 --> 00:33:43,480 Speaker 1: And so you know, if you get into like yoga philosophy, 557 00:33:43,480 --> 00:33:46,640 Speaker 1: it's about again, it's about being in flow, and you 558 00:33:46,720 --> 00:33:51,240 Speaker 1: can get there without doing the actual physical practice. One 559 00:33:51,280 --> 00:33:53,640 Speaker 1: of the things that I'm doing to stay sane is 560 00:33:53,760 --> 00:33:57,640 Speaker 1: go up to Kevin mckid's arm and I ride courses 561 00:33:57,840 --> 00:34:00,840 Speaker 1: up on the farm. You know how to ride horses. No, 562 00:34:01,080 --> 00:34:04,240 Speaker 1: I'm learning. It's amazing. I literally I leave all my 563 00:34:04,320 --> 00:34:08,320 Speaker 1: kids on Sunday afternoon and I drive to his farm. 564 00:34:08,719 --> 00:34:13,040 Speaker 1: And there is a wonderful woman there named Emma who 565 00:34:13,239 --> 00:34:16,359 Speaker 1: works and lives on the farm, and she has been 566 00:34:16,360 --> 00:34:20,640 Speaker 1: teaching writing her entire life, and so she um teaches 567 00:34:20,680 --> 00:34:23,960 Speaker 1: me writing. That's that's a big tool for me. What 568 00:34:24,120 --> 00:34:26,840 Speaker 1: do I have to look forward to when Albie hits 569 00:34:26,920 --> 00:34:32,919 Speaker 1: Aliza's eight year old age. She's so funny now, I mean, 570 00:34:33,080 --> 00:34:40,160 Speaker 1: all that cleverness that he's like busting busting bulls, Yeah exactly, 571 00:34:41,200 --> 00:34:44,600 Speaker 1: it's infuriating. But oh my gosh, when he starts weaving 572 00:34:44,640 --> 00:34:47,520 Speaker 1: that into like jokes and like things that he knows 573 00:34:47,560 --> 00:34:50,239 Speaker 1: are going to like just make you bust like you did. 574 00:34:50,400 --> 00:34:52,680 Speaker 1: I mean he's already doing that. It just gets better 575 00:34:52,840 --> 00:34:55,640 Speaker 1: and more. And then also one of the things that's 576 00:34:55,640 --> 00:34:58,880 Speaker 1: so beautiful about seeing her be hilarious is the delight 577 00:34:59,280 --> 00:35:02,120 Speaker 1: that she's taken game from it, right, and that makes 578 00:35:02,200 --> 00:35:04,640 Speaker 1: me feel delight. And so when you have the baby 579 00:35:04,680 --> 00:35:07,759 Speaker 1: who like just figured out that sneezing is hilarious and 580 00:35:07,800 --> 00:35:14,960 Speaker 1: they're like seizing that'slaus and they're going too and they're delighted. 581 00:35:15,320 --> 00:35:18,600 Speaker 1: Or with Pippa, you know, like whatever she loves to, 582 00:35:18,760 --> 00:35:22,040 Speaker 1: like spit on the trampoline right now and then fall, 583 00:35:22,120 --> 00:35:26,000 Speaker 1: and what she's delighted in delights me. And so I 584 00:35:26,040 --> 00:35:29,160 Speaker 1: think at any age, whether they're twelve or sixteen or 585 00:35:30,200 --> 00:35:32,520 Speaker 1: in college like figuring out what they want to study, 586 00:35:32,840 --> 00:35:36,480 Speaker 1: it's watching their delight, watching their delight. Katerina finished this 587 00:35:36,600 --> 00:35:44,640 Speaker 1: sense in this moment, motherhood for me means radical curiosity. 588 00:35:47,160 --> 00:35:51,120 Speaker 1: That's so good when are you teaching this fucking mommy 589 00:35:51,160 --> 00:35:56,400 Speaker 1: and me class, because that's really what keeps you in 590 00:35:56,520 --> 00:35:59,040 Speaker 1: positive Like when my son hits someone in the face 591 00:35:59,040 --> 00:36:03,240 Speaker 1: with a stick, it's like it's like radical curiosity about 592 00:36:03,320 --> 00:36:07,600 Speaker 1: like it's amazing, Like he's never played tug a war 593 00:36:07,680 --> 00:36:10,520 Speaker 1: with a stick before, and of course, like when he's 594 00:36:10,520 --> 00:36:12,759 Speaker 1: someone he loses and someone else gets it, and it's 595 00:36:12,760 --> 00:36:15,880 Speaker 1: like fascinating and curious to watch how he responds in 596 00:36:15,920 --> 00:36:19,480 Speaker 1: that situation. Right, First of all, he's radically curious. He's like, 597 00:36:19,520 --> 00:36:21,000 Speaker 1: what's gonna happen if I hit that kid in the 598 00:36:21,920 --> 00:36:25,600 Speaker 1: one hundred's Everything is further like to see what the 599 00:36:25,600 --> 00:36:28,120 Speaker 1: hell happened, and what's going to happen to his face, 600 00:36:28,320 --> 00:36:30,600 Speaker 1: what's going to happen with my parents? What does that 601 00:36:30,680 --> 00:36:33,839 Speaker 1: mean for me and my relationship to the world, And 602 00:36:33,880 --> 00:36:36,719 Speaker 1: then you get to kind of watch that whole scientific 603 00:36:36,760 --> 00:36:42,080 Speaker 1: experiment unfold and like a little like that didn't go well, 604 00:36:43,960 --> 00:36:47,359 Speaker 1: Oh that didn't go well, I'm leaving the party now 605 00:36:47,560 --> 00:36:51,799 Speaker 1: and I'm not allowed to have the lollype shoot. Thank 606 00:36:51,800 --> 00:36:53,879 Speaker 1: you so much for being on Katie's Crib. I think 607 00:36:53,880 --> 00:36:57,040 Speaker 1: you are the awesomest I really can't wait to sign 608 00:36:57,120 --> 00:36:59,799 Speaker 1: up for your Mommy and Me class or read your 609 00:36:59,800 --> 00:37:04,920 Speaker 1: book whenever I'm on my podcast, on your podcast, anything 610 00:37:05,000 --> 00:37:07,359 Speaker 1: you want. Thank you so much for being on Kati's Crib, 611 00:37:07,360 --> 00:37:09,560 Speaker 1: And thank you guys all for your support for listening. 612 00:37:09,680 --> 00:37:12,440 Speaker 1: Share this episode like it, tell your friends about it, 613 00:37:12,480 --> 00:37:14,960 Speaker 1: and if you have ideas for guests or topics this season, 614 00:37:15,160 --> 00:37:19,040 Speaker 1: please reach out. My email address is Katie's Crib at 615 00:37:19,040 --> 00:37:27,840 Speaker 1: Shonda land dot com. By everybody. Katie's Crib is a 616 00:37:27,880 --> 00:37:30,920 Speaker 1: production of Shonda land Audio in partnership with I Heart Radio. 617 00:37:31,239 --> 00:37:33,520 Speaker 1: For more podcasts from Shanda land Audio, visit the I 618 00:37:33,560 --> 00:37:36,239 Speaker 1: Heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to 619 00:37:36,280 --> 00:37:54,360 Speaker 1: your favorite shows. You can never know. I'm r