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Speaker 1: Hello, gorgeous, Welcome back to the Give Them La La Podcast.

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Speaker 1: I am coming off of like the best week ever

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Speaker 1: I took you. I know, rightoo. I took my kid

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Speaker 1: to Disneyland last week with Jack's and Britts and Cruise

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Speaker 1: and then Shina, Summer Moon and Brock. We did one

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Speaker 1: ride for adults. We did like the you said you

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Speaker 1: did the Incredit Coaster. Yes, in Credit Coaster, we did that.

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Speaker 1: It was amazing. I just needed something. I was like, Okay,

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Speaker 1: today's a kid's day. And by the way, Disneyland when

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Speaker 1: you're there for your kid is like, it's just magical. Right.

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Speaker 1: Ocean was having the best time. So that was the

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Speaker 1: only like adult ride we did very early on in

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Speaker 1: the day and then the rest of the time we

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Speaker 1: just did like little kid rides. But we were literally

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Speaker 1: there from like ten am to I want to say,

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Speaker 1: like ten pm.

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Speaker 2: And did the kids take naps during the day or

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Speaker 2: are they just going going going.

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Speaker 1: Ocean got in one nap and then she was like

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Speaker 1: ready to roll. And then Summer Moon and her parents

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Speaker 1: left a little bit earlier than we did. But you know,

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Speaker 1: Cruisy is also a little champ. You know, the kids

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Speaker 1: are all champs, but they rallied, so that was amazing.

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Speaker 1: I took full advantage this weekend of sleeping in. So

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Speaker 1: what I started doing Jess is on the weekends, I

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Speaker 1: sleep with my phone downstairs, because if I wake up

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Speaker 1: in the morning and I check my phone and I

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Speaker 1: see what time it is, it could be six in

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Speaker 1: the morning, and already my body is going into time.

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Speaker 1: Let's start getting up, getting into wake up mode, you know,

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Speaker 1: like my anxiety starts kicking in and I know, like, okay,

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Speaker 1: it's it's morning time.

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Speaker 2: Okay, that's interesting, So you don't So putting your phone

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Speaker 2: downstairs allows you to sleep longer.

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Speaker 1: I don't wake up to see what time it is,

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Speaker 1: so I just wake up when my body feels ready, okay.

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Speaker 2: And then do you get up or do you continue

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Speaker 2: to try and sleep if like Ocean isn't up or.

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Speaker 1: So Ocean has been doing this thing lately where she'll

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Speaker 1: wake up. And again, I've been her mom for almost

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Speaker 1: two years, so like, I know her little fusses and

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Speaker 1: her little cries, and I can tell in the morning

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Speaker 1: around like eight eight thirty, she's got this like fuss

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Speaker 1: where I know she's not ready to get up. So

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Speaker 1: She'll be awake doing her little fussing and then completely

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Speaker 1: go silent until like ten.

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Speaker 2: She is a champ with sleeping. She's like her mom

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Speaker 2: and her geechie that, which is amazing because I mean,

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Speaker 2: babies are growing, so they need sleep.

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Speaker 1: Yeah. I also think it might be because I run

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Speaker 1: her into the ground.

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Speaker 2: You guys are constantly doing fun stuff at the park. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: so that's probably like.

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Speaker 1: We're constantly doing something where it's like we're going with

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Speaker 1: your friends today, We're going to the park today, We're

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Speaker 1: going to see Christmas lights today. Like it's non stop.

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Speaker 2: And it's not like she goes to bed late because

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Speaker 2: I've baby set her before. She goes to bed at

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Speaker 2: like eight, yeah, eight thirty.

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Speaker 1: So we all exercised our right to sleep in this weekend.

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Speaker 3: I love that.

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Speaker 1: Like literally Sunday morning, I woke up at noon stop

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Speaker 1: and I thought it was like bright and early. So

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Speaker 1: I'm like I walk downstairs, I look at the clock

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Speaker 1: and I'm like, oh my gosh, it's eleven nine No,

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Speaker 1: And I had to like talk myself off the ledge.

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Speaker 1: What do you mean I felt guilty that I slept

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Speaker 1: in stop?

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Speaker 2: Your body needed rest, obviously, did you in was awake

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Speaker 2: with Gigi.

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Speaker 1: I'm assuming Ocean was awake kicking it with jij and

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Speaker 1: she was ready to go down for her nap for

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Speaker 1: the day.

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Speaker 2: They let you sleep in. See that's so important. Your

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Speaker 2: body obviously needed it. Yeah, and it's good you got

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Speaker 2: that rat.

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Speaker 1: Totally because I'm telling you, Disneyland kicked my ass. My

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Speaker 1: body hasn't been that tired since I pushed Ocean out

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Speaker 1: of my cookie. I was like, what happened? I am

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Speaker 1: so tired? Yeah, yeah, And then so cut back to Friday,

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Speaker 1: had a heyday. On Friday, the Utah Utes football team

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Speaker 1: played USC in not a championship game, but it was

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Speaker 1: a big game. It was going to determine if USC

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Speaker 1: could go into winning a national championship or the utah

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Speaker 1: Utes go on to the Rose Bowl the first Not

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Speaker 1: that any of you care about this, but I grew

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Speaker 1: up watching Utah football from the time I was like

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Speaker 1: a tiny little tot. And I dressed Ocean in her

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Speaker 1: little red sweater like she was very utah Utes, and

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Speaker 1: the first quarter was horrendous. I was talking to my

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Speaker 1: brothers on text and my sister in law, also huge

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Speaker 1: Utah fans, being like, this is real fucking bad. Guess

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Speaker 1: what during halftime, I don't know what happened, but the

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Speaker 1: utah Utes fucking pulled it together and whooped that trojan ass.

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Speaker 2: I was like, you better work, boys, That's amazing the

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Speaker 2: utah Ute.

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Speaker 1: So the mascot is Swoop. It represents the red tailed hawk,

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Speaker 1: a bird indigenous to the state of Utah. Oh okay, yes,

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Speaker 1: so that is the mascot. Our mascot is very sexy

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Speaker 1: because sometimes he wears football uniform. So he looked good.

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Speaker 1: He looked real good.

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Speaker 2: Oh sorry, I was gonna say, with everyone at Brittany

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Speaker 2: and Jack's Jackson's house rooting for.

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Speaker 1: No, they didn't give two fun Okay. At my mom's

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Speaker 1: birthday dinner, I volunteered Jacks and his home to host

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Speaker 1: me to watch the game. And but towards the end

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Speaker 1: everyone was getting into it. It was just Jackson, britt Me,

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Speaker 1: my Mom, Ocean Cruisy, Janet and Jason and so towards

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Speaker 1: the end, you know, the boys started getting into it

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Speaker 1: because it was It was a really great game, and

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Speaker 1: I loved watching it because I felt like I was

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Speaker 1: back in Utah, like that's what I grew up on,

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Speaker 1: Like football was shoved down my throat as a child,

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Speaker 1: like Sundays were NFL Monday Night football, Thursday night football,

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Speaker 1: Friday was high school football, Saturday was it was just

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Speaker 1: a lot like it was NonStop, and my whole family

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Speaker 1: was that way. So it felt amazing, especially to watch

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Speaker 1: Ocean like, not that she cared about the game. Maybe

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Speaker 1: it was just the running like something she was into

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Speaker 1: that was happening. She was watching it, dancing, totally into it.

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Speaker 1: So the University of Utah football team is going to

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Speaker 1: the Rose Bowl in Pasadena. I'm getting tickets for the

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Speaker 1: whole family.

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Speaker 2: When is it.

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Speaker 1: It's on January second.

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Speaker 2: Oh, that's a great day.

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Speaker 1: Great day. That's a great day.

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Speaker 2: That's a Sunday.

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Speaker 1: Is Monday? I think it's a Monday. Okay, well that's.

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Speaker 2: A great day. Everyone's still on like it's twenty twenty three.

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Speaker 2: But you're not like we got to get back to it.

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Speaker 1: No, you're not quite there yet where it's like the

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Speaker 1: grind starts again. So now I've got to go and

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Speaker 1: get all of my family matching Utah gear. I'm just

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Speaker 1: very excited. I'm very excited about it that my week

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Speaker 1: was great and today's podcast is going to be lit

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Speaker 1: af because I have a fawn. Look a man named

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Speaker 1: Mike Johnson. Mike Johnson, he was on the Bachelorette. He

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Speaker 1: is a US Air Force veteran, and he's also a

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Speaker 1: sex coach, a sex coach, and an author.

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Speaker 2: Yes, yay, let me say something. I had a lot

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Speaker 2: of fun during this interview just watching you two. And

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Speaker 2: you'll hear in the interview Lalla talk about where she's

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Speaker 2: at in the state of like relationships and whatnot. But

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Speaker 2: it was a lot of fun to watch Lalla and

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Speaker 2: Mike chat because I think they have chemistry.

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Speaker 1: And that's just fun to watch.

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Speaker 2: That's just fun to watch. So I think you'll hear it.

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Speaker 2: He'll be able to hear it.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, we talk about a lot of stuff. He is

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Speaker 1: very smart. And you know what, me talking about my relationship,

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Speaker 1: I don't even know where I'm at right, Like I

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Speaker 1: talk about it and I make zero sense. So you

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Speaker 1: guys just roll with me, because I know you guys

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Speaker 1: are going through similar things, Like I'm not the only

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Speaker 1: one being like I don't know what the fuck is happening.

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Speaker 2: No, people change their I mean I'm there and I

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Speaker 2: feel like, not about my relationship, but just with things

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Speaker 2: in general.

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Speaker 1: In life.

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Speaker 2: One day I'm like I feel this way, and the

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Speaker 2: next day I'm like, I don't feel that way at all.

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Speaker 2: It's yeah, we're all up and down and you have

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Speaker 2: the right to feel that way.

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Speaker 1: Just roll with it, you know, none of us. Anytime

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Speaker 1: I hear someone say like I just thought i'd have

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Speaker 1: my life figured out out by now, my love, we

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Speaker 1: never have our lives figured out. And just like just

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Speaker 1: when we think we do, life throws us the curveball

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Speaker 1: to make sure like we're still awake. Just want to

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Speaker 1: make sure you're still Brandon anyway. When we come back,

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Speaker 1: We've got Mike Johnson and I'm excited. He's so hot. Hello,

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Speaker 1: my loves, we are backed with Mike Johnson. You are

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Speaker 1: very good looking.

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Speaker 3: Good for you, you're good looking yourself. I am, yeah, definitely,

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Speaker 3: you know that. Thank you.

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Speaker 1: No, well, it depends on the day. The moments that

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Speaker 1: we look like shit, those are called humbling moments.

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Speaker 3: This is true. My mom loves to give me those

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Speaker 3: humbling moments.

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Speaker 1: Yes, those moments are good. So the first thing I

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Speaker 1: have to ask, how the how did you end up

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Speaker 1: on reality TV?

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Speaker 3: Like?

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Speaker 1: What made you say like the Bachelorette? That sounds right, Yeah,

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Speaker 1: that's what you were on Bachelorette.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, well one. I never even had heard of

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Speaker 3: the Bachelorette, never watched the episode, and they know who

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Speaker 3: no one was on the show. But I was, true story.

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Speaker 3: I I was financial advisor, doing pretty good for myself

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Speaker 3: at the military, and I threw my phone one day

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Speaker 3: at work and my homeboy and my coworker was like,

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Speaker 3: what the hell wrong with you? And I'm like, real story,

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Speaker 3: I was like why, I'm like, these girls just want

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Speaker 3: to have sex. And I was like, bro, I'm trying

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Speaker 3: to get that I want. I want like the real thing.

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Speaker 3: And I was telling my homeboy like I'm like, I

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Speaker 3: think I was like twenty eight at the time, twenty nine.

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Speaker 3: I was like, I wanted wife and kids, bruh. And

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Speaker 3: he was laughing, Okay, he was dying laughing. He was like,

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Speaker 3: what do that can actually get? Women says that? And

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Speaker 3: I'm like me, I'm you know, I want the real

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Speaker 3: thing or whatever, And so literally about forty five minutes

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Speaker 3: of him just talking about me laughing. A few weeks later,

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Speaker 3: he sent me a Facebook message. Whoever goes on Facebook anyway,

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Speaker 3: but he sent me a Facebook thing for a calling

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Speaker 3: casting and I was off work that day, so I

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Speaker 3: was like, why not?

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Speaker 1: Really? Yeah, and you had never seen it before, never.

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Speaker 3: Watched a single episode, never watched one second prior to

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Speaker 3: that moment.

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Speaker 1: How was that experience? Because I've been doing reality TV

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Speaker 1: for a long time, the show you were on is

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Speaker 1: a little bit different because number one, you're competing for

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Speaker 1: the love of a woman, right.

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Speaker 3: Yes.

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Speaker 1: The other thing is is I feel like you guys

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Speaker 1: are being filmed all the time, Like you're in one

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Speaker 1: place and it's like cameras are up, you're constantly miked.

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Speaker 2: That would freak me the fuck out, and really quick

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Speaker 2: before you go into that experience, I did want to

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Speaker 2: say because I had a girlfriend who made it pretty fast.

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Speaker 2: She didn't get on the show, but I heard because

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Speaker 2: this will tie into something you did.

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Speaker 1: She made it far in the audition process, yes, but

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Speaker 1: didn't get to that.

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Speaker 2: They really get into your background.

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Speaker 1: Is that true?

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Speaker 2: Like they look into like your job and they like

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Speaker 2: it's almost like a mini PI thing.

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Speaker 1: I love this question.

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Speaker 3: I don't really know how far they get into it

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Speaker 3: for every single individual, because some people they find out

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Speaker 3: the streets like damn you fine? Are you good looking?

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Speaker 3: At wherever? The fris Be come on. And then for me,

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Speaker 3: I did have to put my X on there. But

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Speaker 3: I don't think they ever reached out to her because

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Speaker 3: you know, she would have told my ass. You like

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Speaker 3: they called me all of it. You know, she would

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Speaker 3: be all that and my job. No one ever called

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Speaker 3: my jobs either. I did have a five hundred and

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Speaker 3: eighty three questions psychology test, so like, that part definitely

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Speaker 3: is there, and you do. I mean, it is a

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Speaker 3: full extensive background, but I don't know how in depth

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Speaker 3: they go for every individual. Now, if you're crazy and

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Speaker 3: you got some shit on your record, then.

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Speaker 1: They might check you out more and then they'll find it.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I think that's what it's probably. I think I'm

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Speaker 3: assuming that's what it's like because they can't probably go

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Speaker 3: through every single individual, but if you got some let's say, stains,

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Speaker 3: they might dig deeper.

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Speaker 1: Okay, I like that, So my job's done there. I

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Speaker 1: pass that. Good for you. I'm so wounded here I am.

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Speaker 3: Let me you're fine.

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Speaker 1: I'm gonna unload my baggage on deal. I Since my

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Speaker 1: last relationship, I put a PI on everyone new that

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Speaker 1: comes into my life who I'm like into in that.

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Speaker 3: Way, what's the return on investment for that?

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Speaker 1: But my job is done with you the Bachelor. I

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Speaker 1: did it, That's what I'm saying.

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Speaker 3: Oh yeah, no, I'm great.

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Speaker 1: So I get to keep two thousand dollars.

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Speaker 3: There you go.

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Speaker 1: Two It's a lot.

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Speaker 3: I just google your ass.

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Speaker 1: There's all kind of weaki clean. I'm weakly clean.

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Speaker 3: I mean I could see online you got a nice

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Speaker 3: little ass on you.

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Speaker 1: Tell me more. I took that picture.

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Speaker 3: Thank you.

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Speaker 1: I know everyone took this and somebody be like, she

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Speaker 1: probably set it up on a tripod. I was like,

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Speaker 1: I set it up on Jessica. I was like, can

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Speaker 1: you take a picture of my ass? This could feel

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Speaker 1: very wrong one day. She doesn't like me anymore. She

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Speaker 1: made me take pictures of her naked.

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Speaker 3: Fact, you gotta be careful about this stuff these days.

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Speaker 1: I worry about it all the time. I'm like, Jessica, no,

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Speaker 1: which is so funny.

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Speaker 2: That's not even true, because she was questioning it, like

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Speaker 2: should I do this photo?

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Speaker 1: It's dumb.

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Speaker 2: I was like, get your ass in the shower. We're

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Speaker 2: taking a nude photo.

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Speaker 3: That's something that dudes just can't do. Like my homeboys, like, hey, bro,

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Speaker 3: you look you've been working out, like, I see you

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Speaker 3: dig man like dudes can't do that. You just don't

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Speaker 3: work the same.

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Speaker 1: No, it does not.

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Speaker 3: I'm like, what.

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Speaker 2: To me?

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Speaker 1: Right, So you really wanted to find love? Your fine

293
00:14:04,160 --> 00:14:06,320
Speaker 1: ass was like, I want to be married with kids,

294
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Speaker 1: which in my experience doesn't happen often.

295
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Speaker 3: In my experience, a lot of women don't have respect

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Speaker 3: for men because of the things that men have done.

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Speaker 3: And I completely understand that I have respect your thoughts

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Speaker 3: on that. I personally absolutely love the respect from others, and.

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Speaker 1: So I feel that I love this for you.

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Speaker 3: Thank you.

301
00:14:23,280 --> 00:14:25,320
Speaker 1: Did you like the girl who was the bachelorette?

302
00:14:25,880 --> 00:14:26,320
Speaker 3: She's cool?

303
00:14:26,520 --> 00:14:27,040
Speaker 1: She was cool.

304
00:14:27,080 --> 00:14:28,560
Speaker 3: Yeah, she's definitely cool people.

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Speaker 1: Hannah Brown, how far did you get with her? Well,

306
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Speaker 1: I don't mean sexually, just like in the competition, I.

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Speaker 3: Wasn't meaning sexually. Guy, this is years ago. I think

308
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Speaker 3: I got sent home in sixth place.

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Speaker 1: That's pretty good because how many dudes are there, like

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Speaker 1: twenty initially it's like.

311
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Speaker 3: Thirty, But I mean I don't consider that good.

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Speaker 1: But yeah, yeah, you're kind of like me where I'm like,

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Speaker 1: unless I won the sacond.

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Speaker 3: Well, see, this is the thing about the Bachelor, though,

315
00:14:56,800 --> 00:14:59,400
Speaker 3: it's like, it's not a competition to me in terms

316
00:14:59,440 --> 00:15:01,920
Speaker 3: of like winning are losing, it's a competition, and cannot

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Speaker 3: see myself with this person. If not, then I gotta leave.

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Speaker 1: Did you leave on your own?

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Speaker 3: No? She let me go.

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Speaker 1: Oh, she let you go.

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Speaker 3: She definitely let me go.

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Speaker 1: Do you think she let you go because she could

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Speaker 1: feel that like it just wasn't hitting right for both

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Speaker 1: of you?

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Speaker 3: Yeah? Absolutely, yeah. I mean, this is the beautiful thing

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Speaker 3: about being the lead in the show like that is

327
00:15:18,760 --> 00:15:20,760
Speaker 3: that you this is the one time you truly can

328
00:15:20,800 --> 00:15:23,600
Speaker 3: be selfish and can't nobody say shit. Yeah, like, hey,

329
00:15:23,880 --> 00:15:25,720
Speaker 3: I think you're a great individual. But you might not

330
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Speaker 3: be for me, but you might be for La La,

331
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Speaker 3: or you might be for Jessica, you might be for

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Speaker 3: someone else.

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Speaker 1: Right. That would be so hard for me because if

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00:15:31,800 --> 00:15:34,720
Speaker 1: you put does the chick have any say in who

335
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Speaker 1: the men are.

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Speaker 3: Going to be?

337
00:15:36,480 --> 00:15:38,440
Speaker 1: Like? Does she get to say these are the types I.

338
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Speaker 3: Wish, I wish I would like if I was to

339
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Speaker 3: be the lead, I would like, Yo, if you want

340
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Speaker 3: a good drama show, bring these thirty women on and

341
00:15:46,400 --> 00:15:48,120
Speaker 3: I'm like all of them right, Yeah, So then it

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Speaker 3: would be really really.

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Speaker 2: Interesting question on all like that that about you being

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Speaker 2: the lead. I when I was googling you heard a

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00:15:56,640 --> 00:16:00,400
Speaker 2: rumor and read something where it said you were in

346
00:16:00,520 --> 00:16:04,200
Speaker 2: the running to be the lead, I think after Hannah's season.

347
00:16:04,600 --> 00:16:07,240
Speaker 2: But then they chose Peter Weber instead, which is funny

348
00:16:07,240 --> 00:16:09,160
Speaker 2: because it's the only season I watch, and I think

349
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Speaker 2: he's so fucking boring. No disrespect to Peter, but he's

350
00:16:13,360 --> 00:16:18,480
Speaker 2: your homide name, Peter Webber. I loved the season, but

351
00:16:18,680 --> 00:16:20,640
Speaker 2: I loved it going to be a Bachelor?

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00:16:20,760 --> 00:16:21,880
Speaker 1: Were you uh for?

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00:16:22,000 --> 00:16:23,520
Speaker 3: I answered, I want to give a caveat because you

354
00:16:23,560 --> 00:16:25,200
Speaker 3: know how read it are and how people are on

355
00:16:25,280 --> 00:16:28,000
Speaker 3: the internet. Mike still talking about this years later. One

356
00:16:28,400 --> 00:16:31,720
Speaker 3: I was asked this question, Okay, but I was in

357
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Speaker 3: the running. Yeah, and they chose Peter. Peter's a great guy.

358
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Speaker 1: You're so diplomatic. He's a great guy. I'm like, fuck

359
00:16:37,440 --> 00:16:38,320
Speaker 1: this mocking.

360
00:16:39,400 --> 00:16:42,320
Speaker 2: I loved the season, but I did. I did love

361
00:16:42,400 --> 00:16:44,160
Speaker 2: it because of the women. The women on that season

362
00:16:44,240 --> 00:16:47,160
Speaker 2: were bomb. They were hilarious, they were fun, they were

363
00:16:47,280 --> 00:16:47,960
Speaker 2: just entertaining.

364
00:16:48,080 --> 00:16:52,440
Speaker 1: He does look a little snoozel, doesn't snooze.

365
00:16:52,480 --> 00:16:55,160
Speaker 3: I mean, I will say if I were the lead,

366
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Speaker 3: I think I'll bring definitely a different type of attribute

367
00:16:59,760 --> 00:17:02,200
Speaker 3: to rule, Like what I mean, I think you're just

368
00:17:02,280 --> 00:17:03,240
Speaker 3: looking at me like different.

369
00:17:03,720 --> 00:17:06,600
Speaker 1: Well, yeah, the other leads you definitely hit different. You

370
00:17:06,680 --> 00:17:10,600
Speaker 1: write sex books. You are a sex cold. The ladies

371
00:17:10,600 --> 00:17:12,680
Speaker 1: are gonna be like, I need to get in the room.

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00:17:14,760 --> 00:17:14,920
Speaker 3: You know.

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00:17:15,600 --> 00:17:17,280
Speaker 1: Wait, are you writing in this book? You just gave

374
00:17:17,320 --> 00:17:20,680
Speaker 1: me your book? Yeah, making the love you want? Yes,

375
00:17:20,880 --> 00:17:23,160
Speaker 1: I can't wait to read this. Are you talking about

376
00:17:23,720 --> 00:17:24,760
Speaker 1: what you like in this book?

377
00:17:25,320 --> 00:17:25,359
Speaker 3: No?

378
00:17:25,720 --> 00:17:28,040
Speaker 1: Because that could make things interesting if you're the bachelor,

379
00:17:28,080 --> 00:17:30,000
Speaker 1: because all the tricks would be like, I know exactly

380
00:17:30,080 --> 00:17:32,840
Speaker 1: what he wants. He wants a little salt and pepper

381
00:17:32,880 --> 00:17:37,280
Speaker 1: shaker or whatever that called. What's it called? What is it?

382
00:17:39,480 --> 00:17:40,640
Speaker 3: I don't grapefruit trick?

383
00:17:43,040 --> 00:17:46,200
Speaker 1: Oh, back when I was like twenty three, love the

384
00:17:46,280 --> 00:17:48,960
Speaker 1: grape fruit trick, A little vibrator on the balls.

385
00:17:50,160 --> 00:17:52,120
Speaker 2: See you guys know, because.

386
00:17:53,720 --> 00:17:55,280
Speaker 1: Oh pop, that was like twenty one.

387
00:17:55,400 --> 00:17:55,920
Speaker 3: Hey, there you go.

388
00:17:56,040 --> 00:17:58,119
Speaker 1: So what you're doing now being boring?

389
00:17:58,280 --> 00:17:59,720
Speaker 3: Trust me? Why are you being boring?

390
00:18:00,400 --> 00:18:00,760
Speaker 1: I don't know.

391
00:18:00,960 --> 00:18:04,160
Speaker 3: You still got like a good seventy years of life left.

392
00:18:04,920 --> 00:18:07,280
Speaker 1: Do you think stress fucks up your libido? And shit?

393
00:18:07,480 --> 00:18:10,440
Speaker 1: I don't think I know Okay, well then that's the reason.

394
00:18:10,640 --> 00:18:11,760
Speaker 3: There you go. We can work on that.

395
00:18:12,080 --> 00:18:14,479
Speaker 1: I would love to because you are a sex coach, right,

396
00:18:14,560 --> 00:18:17,880
Speaker 1: is that true? Yes, let's put you get into that. Yeah,

397
00:18:18,080 --> 00:18:20,720
Speaker 1: let's break this down all right. You went from what

398
00:18:20,840 --> 00:18:23,920
Speaker 1: you said, a financial advisor. Yes, so you're good with money.

399
00:18:23,960 --> 00:18:26,440
Speaker 1: I love that you were in the air Force. Yes,

400
00:18:27,040 --> 00:18:28,600
Speaker 1: thank you for what you've done for our country.

401
00:18:28,840 --> 00:18:29,840
Speaker 3: Thank you for your appreciation.

402
00:18:30,359 --> 00:18:33,640
Speaker 1: And then you were on the Bachelorette. Yes, you've done

403
00:18:33,680 --> 00:18:36,080
Speaker 1: a lot. Your resume reads and we're all over the place,

404
00:18:36,119 --> 00:18:38,640
Speaker 1: which I'm digging. So how did you get into being

405
00:18:38,760 --> 00:18:40,320
Speaker 1: a sex coach.

406
00:18:40,560 --> 00:18:44,920
Speaker 3: Multiply an individual as a certified sex coach. The reason

407
00:18:44,960 --> 00:18:47,879
Speaker 3: I got into it was because I myself was molested

408
00:18:47,920 --> 00:18:51,840
Speaker 3: as a child. Okay, one in four women are sexually

409
00:18:51,880 --> 00:18:54,560
Speaker 3: assaulted and indoorb's one and six men are. And so

410
00:18:55,280 --> 00:18:56,840
Speaker 3: I got three women. I care a lot about my

411
00:18:56,920 --> 00:18:59,159
Speaker 3: mom's sister and grandma. So you add yourself. Let's say

412
00:18:59,160 --> 00:19:02,000
Speaker 3: you're my fourth lady. One out for you. I have

413
00:19:02,040 --> 00:19:04,160
Speaker 3: been sexual assaulting and so therefore growing up with women

414
00:19:04,680 --> 00:19:07,560
Speaker 3: that kind of affected me. And then also when I

415
00:19:07,600 --> 00:19:09,960
Speaker 3: was in the military, I was a victim's advocate the

416
00:19:10,080 --> 00:19:12,920
Speaker 3: only male on the entire base, and then I will.

417
00:19:13,440 --> 00:19:15,399
Speaker 3: My ex and I had a miscarriage and we stopped

418
00:19:15,440 --> 00:19:18,720
Speaker 3: having sex, and I don't cheat, and so I was like, yo, brother,

419
00:19:18,800 --> 00:19:21,359
Speaker 3: still horny was up, you know, And so I tried

420
00:19:21,400 --> 00:19:23,040
Speaker 3: to I was trying to figure out and do all

421
00:19:23,119 --> 00:19:25,560
Speaker 3: kinds of different things. And someone said go see a

422
00:19:25,600 --> 00:19:27,879
Speaker 3: sex therapist. And my ex at the time, she was

423
00:19:27,920 --> 00:19:29,520
Speaker 3: not with it. But then I got her a coerced

424
00:19:29,520 --> 00:19:31,159
Speaker 3: her to do it, and she was with it. It

425
00:19:31,240 --> 00:19:33,960
Speaker 3: didn't work, but after we broke up, I just wanted

426
00:19:34,000 --> 00:19:36,040
Speaker 3: to learn more about I wanted to take away the

427
00:19:36,119 --> 00:19:38,200
Speaker 3: nicheans that I have as a dumb ass man, and

428
00:19:38,280 --> 00:19:40,600
Speaker 3: then also to just help other people. And then of

429
00:19:40,680 --> 00:19:42,040
Speaker 3: course I want to be fantastic.

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Speaker 1: I love all of these reasons. You have a lot

431
00:19:46,600 --> 00:19:48,440
Speaker 1: of layers. I love this.

432
00:19:49,720 --> 00:19:54,480
Speaker 2: Yeah, no, this is incredible question for you. Do you

433
00:19:54,600 --> 00:19:58,560
Speaker 2: think every guy should eat the cookie? Have you heard

434
00:19:58,640 --> 00:19:59,800
Speaker 2: that expression before?

435
00:20:00,080 --> 00:20:02,240
Speaker 3: I mean I haven't heard the expression, but you can

436
00:20:02,320 --> 00:20:09,080
Speaker 3: get you if a woman likes it, absolutely do I

437
00:20:09,280 --> 00:20:10,639
Speaker 3: like to do it? You damn right, I do.

438
00:20:11,480 --> 00:20:16,120
Speaker 1: That's good because if you ain't the cookie, you ain't

439
00:20:16,160 --> 00:20:19,120
Speaker 1: hitting it right, all right? And when a man eats

440
00:20:19,200 --> 00:20:21,080
Speaker 1: the cookie, there are no red flags.

441
00:20:21,240 --> 00:20:24,560
Speaker 3: There are feelas you heard her saying, I ain't saying

442
00:20:24,600 --> 00:20:26,159
Speaker 3: she said it. There you go.

443
00:20:26,560 --> 00:20:29,159
Speaker 1: I'm the wedding already. Okay. Next question, do you have

444
00:20:29,200 --> 00:20:30,920
Speaker 1: to go to school to be a sex Are you

445
00:20:31,040 --> 00:20:33,680
Speaker 1: a sex therapist or do you call yourself a sex coach?

446
00:20:33,960 --> 00:20:35,600
Speaker 3: And is there a different there's a difference. I'm not

447
00:20:35,640 --> 00:20:38,480
Speaker 3: a sex therapist. Sex therapist focused on today and behind

448
00:20:38,520 --> 00:20:41,000
Speaker 3: in the past, sex coach focused on today in the future.

449
00:20:41,920 --> 00:20:44,879
Speaker 3: I am a certified sex coach. I'm also working on

450
00:20:44,960 --> 00:20:48,600
Speaker 3: becoming a board certified sexologist. I'll have body simmer next year,

451
00:20:49,119 --> 00:20:53,200
Speaker 3: a licensed contra practitioner, and then a practitioner of natural healing.

452
00:20:53,280 --> 00:20:54,800
Speaker 3: I'll have all three of those by the end of

453
00:20:54,920 --> 00:20:57,200
Speaker 3: next December. And so I'm still going to school for

454
00:20:57,280 --> 00:21:00,720
Speaker 3: those things. Right now. It's a tons of work. Like

455
00:21:00,880 --> 00:21:03,359
Speaker 3: it ain't like, hey, stick your penis here, you know,

456
00:21:03,440 --> 00:21:05,560
Speaker 3: it's so much more work than that, because I have

457
00:21:05,680 --> 00:21:07,320
Speaker 3: to in order for me to be great in bad

458
00:21:07,359 --> 00:21:10,240
Speaker 3: one thing that I had to learn was how to receive,

459
00:21:10,560 --> 00:21:12,560
Speaker 3: and for me individually, I'm just talking about myself. I

460
00:21:12,600 --> 00:21:13,919
Speaker 3: had a hard time with that and so I had

461
00:21:13,920 --> 00:21:16,160
Speaker 3: to do a lot of meditation, a lot of breathing work.

462
00:21:16,760 --> 00:21:19,480
Speaker 3: Outside of just the physical act of sex, you have

463
00:21:19,600 --> 00:21:23,639
Speaker 3: to understand the mind. And you know, they say if

464
00:21:23,680 --> 00:21:26,600
Speaker 3: you can make someone mentally with then you can definitely

465
00:21:26,640 --> 00:21:27,760
Speaker 3: have you know, if I can have your mind, then

466
00:21:27,760 --> 00:21:29,800
Speaker 3: I can have your body. Right. That's I'm not agreeing

467
00:21:29,920 --> 00:21:32,000
Speaker 3: or disagreeing with that. That's just something that some people say.

468
00:21:32,520 --> 00:21:34,520
Speaker 3: And I need to know how the mind works as well.

469
00:21:34,920 --> 00:21:38,159
Speaker 3: The mind body spirit connection. There's so many pieces into it.

470
00:21:38,240 --> 00:21:40,720
Speaker 3: People just say, oh, sex, he knows how to fuck.

471
00:21:40,960 --> 00:21:44,000
Speaker 3: It's like, yeah, I do, But there's so much more.

472
00:21:44,640 --> 00:21:47,080
Speaker 3: There's so much more to that, so so much more.

473
00:21:47,400 --> 00:21:50,320
Speaker 1: No, I agree, and men and women are so different

474
00:21:50,640 --> 00:21:55,200
Speaker 1: because you can be great in bed, but if mentally

475
00:21:55,440 --> 00:21:58,480
Speaker 1: like you're you don't have me, I'm not getting off.

476
00:21:58,600 --> 00:22:01,120
Speaker 3: You agree, completely agree with you. But then also it's

477
00:22:01,200 --> 00:22:03,560
Speaker 3: not just like I continue to harp on the act

478
00:22:03,640 --> 00:22:06,119
Speaker 3: of the physical act, the core play, as I say, right,

479
00:22:06,400 --> 00:22:10,040
Speaker 3: there's aftercare. That is a lie. It does so much

480
00:22:10,080 --> 00:22:12,480
Speaker 3: for a connection, and so it could be as simple

481
00:22:12,480 --> 00:22:14,080
Speaker 3: as let's say you my girl, and I'm just holding

482
00:22:14,119 --> 00:22:17,359
Speaker 3: your belly, right, those simple things for a man to

483
00:22:17,480 --> 00:22:20,280
Speaker 3: knowens just in comparison to just oh baby by busting

484
00:22:20,280 --> 00:22:21,160
Speaker 3: and goes.

485
00:22:20,880 --> 00:22:23,440
Speaker 1: Lay down right, Yeah, like throws a wet towelet you

486
00:22:23,640 --> 00:22:24,520
Speaker 1: to clean yourself off.

487
00:22:25,200 --> 00:22:28,760
Speaker 3: Sounds like personal experience you've had if anything. Okay, this

488
00:22:28,880 --> 00:22:31,400
Speaker 3: is a tip for the Fellers right quick, like when

489
00:22:31,520 --> 00:22:34,720
Speaker 3: you know when whatever happens, right, get warm up the towel.

490
00:22:35,600 --> 00:22:36,360
Speaker 1: Warm up the towel.

491
00:22:36,480 --> 00:22:38,679
Speaker 3: I warm up the towel. Bro It's so simple.

492
00:22:39,040 --> 00:22:42,639
Speaker 1: It's so simple. Yeah, come on, there's two little things

493
00:22:42,720 --> 00:22:44,360
Speaker 1: there by the faucet.

494
00:22:45,520 --> 00:22:48,840
Speaker 3: Yeah, like giving them a damn coach's fucking easy.

495
00:22:49,200 --> 00:22:52,840
Speaker 2: Right, So get into this aftercare more because I'm very

496
00:22:52,880 --> 00:22:55,160
Speaker 2: and I've never heard of that before because usually it's

497
00:22:55,280 --> 00:22:59,160
Speaker 2: like sex is over one when the guy has ejaculated.

498
00:22:59,320 --> 00:23:02,640
Speaker 4: I love that you because like that it's ended when

499
00:23:02,680 --> 00:23:06,120
Speaker 4: the guy has well because usually they respectfully they get

500
00:23:06,200 --> 00:23:09,159
Speaker 4: you off first, like like with Kyle, it's always never

501
00:23:09,280 --> 00:23:10,399
Speaker 4: happens to me ever and.

502
00:23:11,440 --> 00:23:13,080
Speaker 3: Ever who Kyle is your guy.

503
00:23:17,440 --> 00:23:20,000
Speaker 1: I didn't realize that there were dudes out there that

504
00:23:20,200 --> 00:23:23,119
Speaker 1: like also cared if if I was happy at the end.

505
00:23:23,560 --> 00:23:25,000
Speaker 1: It was like once they were done, it was like

506
00:23:25,080 --> 00:23:29,960
Speaker 1: that was great. Yeah, And I'm sitting here going I

507
00:23:30,080 --> 00:23:33,440
Speaker 1: know it was great for you, but like the being

508
00:23:33,520 --> 00:23:34,320
Speaker 1: in your bathroom for.

509
00:23:34,320 --> 00:23:37,040
Speaker 3: A word, dumb ass guys. We can get off very

510
00:23:37,160 --> 00:23:39,919
Speaker 3: quickly right until you train yourself and then you can

511
00:23:40,000 --> 00:23:41,879
Speaker 3: go like months without getting off. But then you to

512
00:23:42,080 --> 00:23:44,200
Speaker 3: orgasm different than ejaculation, but we can get into that later.

513
00:23:44,680 --> 00:23:47,920
Speaker 3: But after care, because you have first you have rising action,

514
00:23:48,359 --> 00:23:53,640
Speaker 3: which is what happened before penetration. Then you have core play,

515
00:23:53,800 --> 00:23:56,720
Speaker 3: and then you have aftercare or after play, and after

516
00:23:56,800 --> 00:24:01,240
Speaker 3: play is super important. It builds up the intimacy. It

517
00:24:01,280 --> 00:24:04,400
Speaker 3: feels a connection. It's the holding of each other. It's

518
00:24:04,440 --> 00:24:06,800
Speaker 3: just talking and laughing and having fun, making fun of

519
00:24:06,840 --> 00:24:08,720
Speaker 3: one another. Right, it's the fair a moments that you

520
00:24:08,800 --> 00:24:10,960
Speaker 3: smell from each other. It's just being a moment with

521
00:24:11,000 --> 00:24:13,080
Speaker 3: your person. Now, if you just like a sneaky link,

522
00:24:13,320 --> 00:24:14,480
Speaker 3: then you might not want to be doing that.

523
00:24:15,400 --> 00:24:18,840
Speaker 1: No, because I'm for sure getting a toad just so

524
00:24:18,960 --> 00:24:21,840
Speaker 1: if you're doing that after you better throw me a

525
00:24:21,920 --> 00:24:24,240
Speaker 1: warm tile and to clean myself off, like if you

526
00:24:24,320 --> 00:24:27,960
Speaker 1: don't want, because like I can, definitely I'm the type

527
00:24:28,000 --> 00:24:30,639
Speaker 1: of person where all I want is transparency.

528
00:24:31,440 --> 00:24:34,159
Speaker 3: That's it, that's my right lunguage by the way, just being.

529
00:24:34,040 --> 00:24:38,080
Speaker 1: Honest, right, So if I know that you and I

530
00:24:38,520 --> 00:24:42,080
Speaker 1: like we're just fucking, my mind is not even gonna

531
00:24:42,119 --> 00:24:44,920
Speaker 1: go anywhere else. I know what this is, right, Yeah,

532
00:24:45,280 --> 00:24:47,840
Speaker 1: the second you start fucking with my mind. I'm a woman.

533
00:24:47,920 --> 00:24:51,080
Speaker 1: I'm also thirty two years old. I've lived not a

534
00:24:51,160 --> 00:24:53,680
Speaker 1: lot of life, but I've lived some life. I'm a mom, Like,

535
00:24:53,840 --> 00:24:56,480
Speaker 1: I don't have time for that shit, right, So let's

536
00:24:56,520 --> 00:24:57,800
Speaker 1: call it what it is. You don't need to do

537
00:24:57,920 --> 00:25:00,440
Speaker 1: like the aftercare with me. I'm a grown up. I

538
00:25:00,480 --> 00:25:01,720
Speaker 1: can take it. I can have fucks.

539
00:25:02,600 --> 00:25:05,359
Speaker 3: I have fucks, so sure, I can have fucks.

540
00:25:05,560 --> 00:25:08,680
Speaker 1: I can have fucks. I'm actually great at that. I'm

541
00:25:08,880 --> 00:25:14,040
Speaker 1: great at separating that type of shit. Okay, but you're

542
00:25:14,080 --> 00:25:16,440
Speaker 1: right about that in your book, I'll write that chapter

543
00:25:16,560 --> 00:25:16,800
Speaker 1: for you.

544
00:25:17,680 --> 00:25:22,080
Speaker 2: Do you enjoy though, Would you enjoy the aftercare?

545
00:25:22,280 --> 00:25:26,920
Speaker 1: Aftercare is my favorite part because I'm not a cheater.

546
00:25:27,280 --> 00:25:29,640
Speaker 3: Percentage of time that you have sex that you feel

547
00:25:29,640 --> 00:25:30,760
Speaker 3: like you've had a orgasm?

548
00:25:34,040 --> 00:25:34,280
Speaker 1: Low?

549
00:25:36,560 --> 00:25:40,240
Speaker 3: Yeah, Okay, so that was like reverse flipped over to like,

550
00:25:40,280 --> 00:25:43,560
Speaker 3: let's say ninety after care will still be your favorite part.

551
00:25:44,000 --> 00:25:44,320
Speaker 1: I think.

552
00:25:44,359 --> 00:25:45,359
Speaker 3: So that's awesome.

553
00:25:45,400 --> 00:25:45,560
Speaker 1: To know.

554
00:25:45,720 --> 00:25:49,560
Speaker 3: Yeah, thank you, I'm just learning.

555
00:25:50,240 --> 00:25:54,680
Speaker 1: I just like those those moments with someone who I'm into,

556
00:25:55,640 --> 00:25:59,200
Speaker 1: you know, like the sex is great even Like when

557
00:25:59,200 --> 00:26:01,000
Speaker 1: I think about what I want in a partner, I

558
00:26:01,119 --> 00:26:02,520
Speaker 1: know that looks are going to fade, and I know

559
00:26:02,600 --> 00:26:05,120
Speaker 1: that sex as we get older is also going to fade.

560
00:26:05,160 --> 00:26:06,879
Speaker 1: We're not going to be fucking like Jack Rabbits when

561
00:26:06,920 --> 00:26:07,920
Speaker 1: we're like ninety seven.

562
00:26:09,040 --> 00:26:10,480
Speaker 3: I know someone's gonna get mad at that I say this.

563
00:26:10,520 --> 00:26:13,000
Speaker 3: I really don't care. Look black, doone crack?

564
00:26:15,160 --> 00:26:24,000
Speaker 1: I know that from experience. Agreed with you. Yes, we

565
00:26:24,080 --> 00:26:31,840
Speaker 1: all warn anly and fun places. Okay, So you think,

566
00:26:32,359 --> 00:26:34,879
Speaker 1: like when you're dealing with someone who comes to you

567
00:26:34,920 --> 00:26:36,840
Speaker 1: there like I need a sex coach. Where do you

568
00:26:36,960 --> 00:26:37,560
Speaker 1: start with them?

569
00:26:38,200 --> 00:26:40,000
Speaker 3: Lit's sit down and talk. What is it?

570
00:26:40,160 --> 00:26:42,040
Speaker 1: Usually what they want? It depends on what they're coming

571
00:26:42,040 --> 00:26:43,000
Speaker 1: to you for, right, depends on.

572
00:26:42,960 --> 00:26:44,760
Speaker 3: What they're coming if it's an individual, if it's a

573
00:26:44,960 --> 00:26:48,520
Speaker 3: couple of it depends on what's going on. Yeah, so

574
00:26:48,600 --> 00:26:52,879
Speaker 3: a lot of people have this this thing with monogamy, right,

575
00:26:53,000 --> 00:26:59,480
Speaker 3: but what in actuality happens is we're just we're serial

576
00:26:59,600 --> 00:27:02,520
Speaker 3: monogamy in comparison to how what we say we want

577
00:27:02,800 --> 00:27:05,760
Speaker 3: and how we judge other people for not being monogamous,

578
00:27:05,880 --> 00:27:08,320
Speaker 3: but those that are monogamous are just serial monogamous for

579
00:27:08,359 --> 00:27:10,440
Speaker 3: the most part, right, And I love what you said

580
00:27:10,480 --> 00:27:12,399
Speaker 3: about Look, I'm a grown ass woman. Just give it

581
00:27:12,440 --> 00:27:13,879
Speaker 3: to me straight, you know, what would you like? And

582
00:27:13,960 --> 00:27:15,159
Speaker 3: then I can tell you that's what I like, so

583
00:27:15,240 --> 00:27:18,000
Speaker 3: that therefore we can build boundaries and have consent, and

584
00:27:18,080 --> 00:27:21,200
Speaker 3: then you have a wonderful thing going despite what side

585
00:27:21,240 --> 00:27:23,919
Speaker 3: of the field that you lie on. And so when

586
00:27:23,960 --> 00:27:27,160
Speaker 3: it comes to clients, which I don't have many clients

587
00:27:27,240 --> 00:27:30,879
Speaker 3: one on one just because respectfully, time and money doesn't

588
00:27:31,000 --> 00:27:34,160
Speaker 3: equate normally, you know, time per hour. And so that's

589
00:27:34,160 --> 00:27:36,760
Speaker 3: why I'm working on Feelings Seen dot com, which is

590
00:27:36,880 --> 00:27:39,560
Speaker 3: my newsletter that we're coming out with very soon to

591
00:27:39,600 --> 00:27:43,600
Speaker 3: be able to help the masses, the masses at hand.

592
00:27:43,760 --> 00:27:47,440
Speaker 3: And a big thing that the majority of the people

593
00:27:47,480 --> 00:27:49,119
Speaker 3: that have signed up already have talked about is that

594
00:27:50,080 --> 00:27:52,120
Speaker 3: they don't know how to communicate normally, as women don't

595
00:27:52,119 --> 00:27:54,359
Speaker 3: know how to communicate to their man. Hey, babe, I

596
00:27:54,480 --> 00:27:56,320
Speaker 3: love you, but you just haven't given me an orgasm

597
00:27:57,040 --> 00:28:01,760
Speaker 3: in like five years, you know, And I'm like, damn

598
00:28:03,160 --> 00:28:08,080
Speaker 3: you I just want to do to be like, bro,

599
00:28:08,240 --> 00:28:09,680
Speaker 3: you should really listen to the things that I'm about

600
00:28:09,680 --> 00:28:12,160
Speaker 3: to start talking about, Yes, seriously, but then also there's

601
00:28:12,200 --> 00:28:15,240
Speaker 3: things that women could do better as well that guys

602
00:28:15,280 --> 00:28:18,119
Speaker 3: have asked. And I mean it's just all kinds of

603
00:28:18,200 --> 00:28:19,520
Speaker 3: things people have come to me and talk to me

604
00:28:19,560 --> 00:28:23,600
Speaker 3: about privately. You would let your imagination for a while.

605
00:28:24,040 --> 00:28:26,480
Speaker 1: Okay, Well, what is it usually with men that come

606
00:28:26,520 --> 00:28:29,800
Speaker 1: to you about like or a couple? What is the

607
00:28:30,760 --> 00:28:33,440
Speaker 1: man usually have to complain about with the chick.

608
00:28:33,640 --> 00:28:35,680
Speaker 3: When it's a one on one setting. Normally it's a

609
00:28:35,800 --> 00:28:37,960
Speaker 3: chick that comes in, it has the has something that

610
00:28:38,080 --> 00:28:42,840
Speaker 3: she wants it to speak to. Or the times I've

611
00:28:42,880 --> 00:28:46,600
Speaker 3: had men strictly come in without their lady is because

612
00:28:46,600 --> 00:28:48,600
Speaker 3: they want to do better because it's something that's taken

613
00:28:48,600 --> 00:28:49,240
Speaker 3: place already.

614
00:28:49,720 --> 00:28:50,960
Speaker 1: Well, are they cheated or something?

615
00:28:51,560 --> 00:28:55,479
Speaker 3: No, I've had times to where cheating has definitely occurred. Right,

616
00:28:55,680 --> 00:28:57,719
Speaker 3: it's his number two reasons for infidel He's number two

617
00:28:57,720 --> 00:28:58,360
Speaker 3: reasons for divorce.

618
00:28:58,760 --> 00:29:01,400
Speaker 1: Might is the first being financial And so the first

619
00:29:01,520 --> 00:29:02,120
Speaker 1: is financial?

620
00:29:04,280 --> 00:29:06,760
Speaker 3: Have you not seen these tiktoks? Where again, I'm not

621
00:29:06,800 --> 00:29:09,840
Speaker 3: condoning this, I'm just speaking about tiktoks to where women

622
00:29:09,920 --> 00:29:12,120
Speaker 3: are like, yo, he's a billionaire, caught him cheating, but.

623
00:29:14,880 --> 00:29:18,040
Speaker 2: You you showed me the one that says like he's

624
00:29:18,080 --> 00:29:20,560
Speaker 2: got red flags but he like it goes down or eats.

625
00:29:23,760 --> 00:29:27,520
Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm he's number two. Okay, numbers financially, you ain't

626
00:29:27,520 --> 00:29:30,520
Speaker 3: got your money right, You're just not even in the game.

627
00:29:31,120 --> 00:29:33,400
Speaker 1: You want to know what's so crazy is because I

628
00:29:33,480 --> 00:29:35,720
Speaker 1: have the p I now like I look into financials

629
00:29:35,760 --> 00:29:37,960
Speaker 1: before I even allow someone in. But let's just say,

630
00:29:38,040 --> 00:29:39,720
Speaker 1: like I get into that.

631
00:29:39,800 --> 00:29:40,480
Speaker 3: Was a double on time.

632
00:29:41,560 --> 00:29:47,000
Speaker 1: If if I meet someone he's set financially, I'm set financially.

633
00:29:47,280 --> 00:29:48,600
Speaker 3: Set financially, it just.

634
00:29:48,680 --> 00:29:50,520
Speaker 1: Means we're paying our bills on time and we can

635
00:29:50,640 --> 00:29:53,240
Speaker 1: live a comfortable life. I'm not looking for you to

636
00:29:53,360 --> 00:29:55,600
Speaker 1: like get on private planes and take me.

637
00:29:55,760 --> 00:29:57,800
Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm gonna go deep brand said Okay, Okay, So

638
00:29:57,960 --> 00:30:00,400
Speaker 3: when I hear that, I call BS on it, because

639
00:30:00,720 --> 00:30:03,600
Speaker 3: what is one's bills? Bills are completely different for every person.

640
00:30:03,680 --> 00:30:06,239
Speaker 3: So what is give me a number to where you're like, hi,

641
00:30:06,320 --> 00:30:09,320
Speaker 3: I can work with that twenty month, the honey cab month,

642
00:30:09,480 --> 00:30:11,520
Speaker 3: Like what are we talking a million a month, a

643
00:30:11,560 --> 00:30:12,120
Speaker 3: million a day?

644
00:30:12,560 --> 00:30:14,400
Speaker 1: If you're spending a million a day, I think you're

645
00:30:14,440 --> 00:30:16,680
Speaker 1: a fucking idiot, all right, I agree, And I don't

646
00:30:16,680 --> 00:30:19,960
Speaker 1: even care. No, no, I can think of a million

647
00:30:20,040 --> 00:30:22,400
Speaker 1: in one places for you to be spending that money.

648
00:30:22,520 --> 00:30:25,360
Speaker 1: Like I live in Los Angeles. I'm looking like what's

649
00:30:25,440 --> 00:30:27,120
Speaker 1: going on out here? Like you want to spend a

650
00:30:27,160 --> 00:30:29,160
Speaker 1: million a day? I know exactly how you can spend

651
00:30:29,200 --> 00:30:31,320
Speaker 1: that in a productive way. What do you need for

652
00:30:31,480 --> 00:30:34,240
Speaker 1: a million dollars a day, million dollars a month? You're

653
00:30:34,280 --> 00:30:37,880
Speaker 1: fucking crazy. I could go on a tangent about okay,

654
00:30:37,920 --> 00:30:39,480
Speaker 1: so how much you won't even go there? What is it?

655
00:30:39,520 --> 00:30:43,000
Speaker 3: What is a minimum like for you to feel comfortable? Like, okay,

656
00:30:43,200 --> 00:30:43,760
Speaker 3: I'll let you in.

657
00:30:44,360 --> 00:30:46,000
Speaker 1: It's hard for me to put a number on it

658
00:30:46,040 --> 00:30:48,160
Speaker 1: because I think for me, it's I need you to

659
00:30:48,760 --> 00:30:50,800
Speaker 1: have a car. I really don't care what your car

660
00:30:51,560 --> 00:30:54,280
Speaker 1: is looking like you I need you to be driving

661
00:30:54,320 --> 00:30:57,000
Speaker 1: with insurance and a driver's license. Like it's a bare minimum.

662
00:30:57,120 --> 00:30:57,680
Speaker 3: How sad?

663
00:30:57,760 --> 00:30:58,920
Speaker 1: The bar is very low?

664
00:31:00,600 --> 00:31:01,800
Speaker 3: Is that? Come on? Now?

665
00:31:02,160 --> 00:31:04,959
Speaker 1: I'm really being serious, Like, if you as long as

666
00:31:05,040 --> 00:31:08,320
Speaker 1: we can, you're like pulled together. You got somewhere to live,

667
00:31:08,400 --> 00:31:11,040
Speaker 1: You're paying your rent, or your mortgage on time, whatever

668
00:31:11,160 --> 00:31:13,080
Speaker 1: credit card, your racketing.

669
00:31:13,040 --> 00:31:15,560
Speaker 3: All right, cool, we could talk.

670
00:31:16,600 --> 00:31:18,720
Speaker 1: Yeah, as long as you're as long as you're falling

671
00:31:18,760 --> 00:31:21,040
Speaker 1: in line with what you're supposed to do financially, then

672
00:31:21,120 --> 00:31:23,960
Speaker 1: like I can definitely handle all of that, right, because

673
00:31:24,000 --> 00:31:27,600
Speaker 1: I've seen money come and go like that. So whatever,

674
00:31:28,120 --> 00:31:31,520
Speaker 1: let's say we're hitting it off financially at the beginning,

675
00:31:31,960 --> 00:31:35,320
Speaker 1: all is good and then shit changes, because I've seen

676
00:31:35,360 --> 00:31:39,360
Speaker 1: that happen quickly. That would not be a reason for

677
00:31:39,560 --> 00:31:43,680
Speaker 1: me to leave somebody again. I'm only going off of

678
00:31:44,400 --> 00:31:46,360
Speaker 1: like how I grew up, Like my dad hit on

679
00:31:46,440 --> 00:31:48,320
Speaker 1: hard times, my mom stepped up to the plate where

680
00:31:48,320 --> 00:31:52,680
Speaker 1: their arguments, but it was not to the point where

681
00:31:52,720 --> 00:31:56,520
Speaker 1: they like divorce was on the table. So for me,

682
00:31:56,720 --> 00:32:00,240
Speaker 1: like you would catch me stripping right like to pay

683
00:32:00,280 --> 00:32:02,160
Speaker 1: these bills and make sure that we were good. It's

684
00:32:02,200 --> 00:32:05,600
Speaker 1: just who I am. You'll catch me on only fans fans, No,

685
00:32:05,760 --> 00:32:08,000
Speaker 1: I don't. But if we were struggling, me and my man,

686
00:32:08,000 --> 00:32:09,920
Speaker 1: I'd be like, I got you, babe, Like we're all.

687
00:32:10,000 --> 00:32:11,840
Speaker 3: I got you, I got I do, I got.

688
00:32:14,160 --> 00:32:19,080
Speaker 1: I Would you fucking cheat? You're done. We're never having

689
00:32:19,080 --> 00:32:22,000
Speaker 1: another conversation we got kids. You can talk to my lawyer, like,

690
00:32:22,160 --> 00:32:27,640
Speaker 1: you will never know for real, cheating done. I will

691
00:32:27,720 --> 00:32:28,520
Speaker 1: never work through it.

692
00:32:28,640 --> 00:32:30,640
Speaker 3: Let me ask you another question. Yes, so this is

693
00:32:30,680 --> 00:32:31,000
Speaker 3: the question.

694
00:32:31,120 --> 00:32:33,040
Speaker 1: Feel like I'm with a therapist right now with you.

695
00:32:34,840 --> 00:32:37,480
Speaker 3: So how would you feel if you're a guy? Was like, babe,

696
00:32:37,800 --> 00:32:39,840
Speaker 3: it's been a few years. I absolutely love everything you're doing.

697
00:32:39,920 --> 00:32:42,240
Speaker 3: You're phenomenal. I don't I'll never cheat on you, but

698
00:32:42,280 --> 00:32:45,800
Speaker 3: I want to have a conversation around cessential phenomenogamy. What

699
00:32:45,960 --> 00:32:48,400
Speaker 3: is that Potential nomenogamy is to wear.

700
00:32:48,440 --> 00:32:49,560
Speaker 1: Where the third party comes in.

701
00:32:50,080 --> 00:32:52,320
Speaker 3: Yes, yeah, we can go with that term.

702
00:32:52,440 --> 00:32:54,560
Speaker 2: Yeah, or an open relationship.

703
00:32:55,400 --> 00:32:56,960
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's a bit different, but yeah, we'll go with that.

704
00:32:57,400 --> 00:33:00,840
Speaker 1: For me personally, I would say with that comment like,

705
00:33:01,200 --> 00:33:03,080
Speaker 1: I don't think you're happy at this point in time,

706
00:33:03,160 --> 00:33:05,120
Speaker 1: and I think this relationship has run its course, and

707
00:33:05,120 --> 00:33:07,120
Speaker 1: I wish you all the best. Thank you for talking

708
00:33:07,160 --> 00:33:09,880
Speaker 1: to me before you went and cree, but like, I'm

709
00:33:09,920 --> 00:33:11,720
Speaker 1: all good. I hope you can find someone who's willing

710
00:33:11,840 --> 00:33:14,000
Speaker 1: to have threesomes with you, because I ain't it.

711
00:33:14,200 --> 00:33:17,080
Speaker 3: No, it doesn't have three threesons, but fair, completely fair, Wait.

712
00:33:16,960 --> 00:33:18,360
Speaker 1: What do you mean it doesn't have to be threesomes

713
00:33:18,400 --> 00:33:19,840
Speaker 1: if you're the third party.

714
00:33:20,200 --> 00:33:21,880
Speaker 3: That's why I said we'll go with your term, because

715
00:33:21,880 --> 00:33:23,480
Speaker 3: I didn't want to get too far in detail into

716
00:33:23,520 --> 00:33:26,120
Speaker 3: the definitions of it. But it could be you saying, hey,

717
00:33:26,160 --> 00:33:27,600
Speaker 3: I want to go sleep with another dude every now

718
00:33:27,600 --> 00:33:28,880
Speaker 3: and or another girl every now and then.

719
00:33:29,080 --> 00:33:29,600
Speaker 1: I don't want that.

720
00:33:30,000 --> 00:33:33,720
Speaker 3: That's perfectly fine. The reason I asked was because you

721
00:33:33,760 --> 00:33:37,960
Speaker 3: were speaking about cheating and infidelity. And what I found

722
00:33:38,120 --> 00:33:40,920
Speaker 3: via my research is that for the record, I don't

723
00:33:40,920 --> 00:33:44,800
Speaker 3: condone it, don't condone it. But what I found via

724
00:33:44,880 --> 00:33:47,440
Speaker 3: my research is that infidelity is because the truth is

725
00:33:47,520 --> 00:33:51,520
Speaker 3: harder than the lie. Yeah, and so I find that

726
00:33:51,600 --> 00:33:53,560
Speaker 3: a lot of people have a really hard time telling

727
00:33:53,640 --> 00:33:55,600
Speaker 3: that truth, whatever that truth may be, and so that

728
00:33:55,680 --> 00:34:01,040
Speaker 3: therefore they are cowardly and they go being male woman,

729
00:34:01,120 --> 00:34:04,880
Speaker 3: whatever your gender is, and they seek pleasure outside of

730
00:34:04,920 --> 00:34:07,480
Speaker 3: that relationship in comparison. That's why I follow that question

731
00:34:07,560 --> 00:34:09,200
Speaker 3: that was saying, how would you feel about this? And

732
00:34:09,280 --> 00:34:12,320
Speaker 3: you said that person's truth within their relationship with you,

733
00:34:12,400 --> 00:34:14,680
Speaker 3: So therefore they'll be scared to bring that up to you,

734
00:34:14,719 --> 00:34:16,279
Speaker 3: which is their truth, and they never lie to you

735
00:34:16,400 --> 00:34:18,000
Speaker 3: or don't cheated on you, right.

736
00:34:17,960 --> 00:34:19,719
Speaker 1: But if that's not, if I'm not interested in that,

737
00:34:19,880 --> 00:34:20,960
Speaker 1: then we're on different paths.

738
00:34:21,120 --> 00:34:23,160
Speaker 3: Correct. I agree with you, you know, there's nothing wrong

739
00:34:23,200 --> 00:34:25,160
Speaker 3: with that, like cool, And.

740
00:34:25,239 --> 00:34:28,000
Speaker 1: It's weird because I feel like there's conversations that have

741
00:34:28,160 --> 00:34:31,000
Speaker 1: to be had with couples these days, just because there's

742
00:34:31,080 --> 00:34:34,040
Speaker 1: so everything is so accessible on your phone, Like you're

743
00:34:34,120 --> 00:34:36,440
Speaker 1: learning about Oh I could be enough thrupple or I

744
00:34:36,480 --> 00:34:39,560
Speaker 1: could you know. I'm like, I'm like rated g over

745
00:34:39,640 --> 00:34:41,279
Speaker 1: here right, like I I like on.

746
00:34:43,400 --> 00:34:43,440
Speaker 3: You.

747
00:34:44,160 --> 00:34:47,840
Speaker 1: I just like there's so many things out there sexually

748
00:34:48,000 --> 00:34:49,960
Speaker 1: with however many people and how it works, and I'm like,

749
00:34:50,040 --> 00:34:52,040
Speaker 1: this is too much. I don't like it. We all

750
00:34:52,120 --> 00:34:54,560
Speaker 1: need to find God and that's just where we're at.

751
00:34:55,280 --> 00:35:01,640
Speaker 1: But so for me, lying freaks me out because I

752
00:35:01,680 --> 00:35:04,320
Speaker 1: don't want to keep up with the lie. And I

753
00:35:04,440 --> 00:35:08,280
Speaker 1: also know that karma exists, so when I'm thinking about, okay,

754
00:35:08,480 --> 00:35:11,120
Speaker 1: I the lie may be easier for me to tell

755
00:35:11,239 --> 00:35:13,920
Speaker 1: right now, but at some point down the line, I'm

756
00:35:13,960 --> 00:35:16,040
Speaker 1: gonna have to like pay for that. I'm gonna have

757
00:35:16,120 --> 00:35:19,600
Speaker 1: to be held accountable. I agree that part freaks me out.

758
00:35:19,840 --> 00:35:21,919
Speaker 3: And if it's not the person that has to hold

759
00:35:21,920 --> 00:35:26,160
Speaker 3: you accountable. Someone will hold you accountable, whether it be something,

760
00:35:26,239 --> 00:35:27,880
Speaker 3: will hold you accountable, agree you completely.

761
00:35:28,239 --> 00:35:30,480
Speaker 1: So I just like to keep it one hundred and I.

762
00:35:31,680 --> 00:35:35,839
Speaker 1: I haven't been in a really healthy partnership honestly since

763
00:35:35,880 --> 00:35:38,239
Speaker 1: I was probably in high school with like my high

764
00:35:38,239 --> 00:35:42,760
Speaker 1: school sweetheart. You tell me, Doc, I have no fucking idea.

765
00:35:43,239 --> 00:35:47,000
Speaker 1: I'm attracting something real fucking limitics in these streets. I'm like,

766
00:35:48,160 --> 00:35:50,120
Speaker 1: I feel like I do the work on myself, but

767
00:35:50,160 --> 00:35:53,279
Speaker 1: I'm attracted in some weirdos, you know.

768
00:35:54,280 --> 00:35:57,720
Speaker 2: From an outsider looking in. Here's the thing which pisses

769
00:35:57,800 --> 00:36:00,239
Speaker 2: me off, but we won't go there. To me, I

770
00:36:00,280 --> 00:36:03,040
Speaker 2: feel like she goes for the good, the good things

771
00:36:03,560 --> 00:36:05,080
Speaker 2: like in her past relationship.

772
00:36:06,480 --> 00:36:07,440
Speaker 1: I guess she.

773
00:36:07,600 --> 00:36:09,520
Speaker 2: Goes for like she's like, yeah, I get maybe he's

774
00:36:09,560 --> 00:36:11,480
Speaker 2: not the best looking, maybe he's not this, maybe he's

775
00:36:11,560 --> 00:36:13,560
Speaker 2: not that, but he's gonna take care of my heart

776
00:36:13,600 --> 00:36:15,920
Speaker 2: and soul. I can feel it. He's my best friend,

777
00:36:16,239 --> 00:36:18,080
Speaker 2: and so that's why I'm gonna be with this person.

778
00:36:18,560 --> 00:36:21,239
Speaker 2: And like it makes it pisses me off because I

779
00:36:21,280 --> 00:36:24,080
Speaker 2: do feel like Laala goes for the good things, which

780
00:36:24,200 --> 00:36:27,160
Speaker 2: for some reason in today's world, when you're looking for

781
00:36:27,239 --> 00:36:31,040
Speaker 2: the good things or something, you find these people and

782
00:36:31,440 --> 00:36:34,400
Speaker 2: they trick you. It's like when you're looking for the

783
00:36:34,480 --> 00:36:37,279
Speaker 2: good things, that attracts you to the manipulators. And it's

784
00:36:37,360 --> 00:36:40,120
Speaker 2: weird to say because like, I feel like I have

785
00:36:40,200 --> 00:36:41,759
Speaker 2: a good guy. I've been with him for six years,

786
00:36:41,840 --> 00:36:43,680
Speaker 2: like he's the greatest, but I also feel it's a

787
00:36:43,680 --> 00:36:46,160
Speaker 2: shout out to Kyle, but I'm lucky, and I feel

788
00:36:46,200 --> 00:36:49,239
Speaker 2: like she does go for that, like she's not necessarily

789
00:36:49,440 --> 00:36:51,399
Speaker 2: from an outsider looking in the person that's gonna see

790
00:36:51,440 --> 00:36:53,759
Speaker 2: hot guy and be like this is it. I don't

791
00:36:53,840 --> 00:36:57,120
Speaker 2: care what I'm getting with this guy. She's gonna like

792
00:36:57,800 --> 00:37:00,919
Speaker 2: get with someone and invite I went into her life

793
00:37:01,000 --> 00:37:03,239
Speaker 2: if they're a good person or she feels they're a

794
00:37:03,280 --> 00:37:05,600
Speaker 2: good person. So then when you find out they're not,

795
00:37:05,920 --> 00:37:08,200
Speaker 2: that's what's infuriating. It's like, why are the people who

796
00:37:08,239 --> 00:37:11,080
Speaker 2: are looking for the good things getting fucked over a lot?

797
00:37:11,360 --> 00:37:12,239
Speaker 1: So I don't think it's on you.

798
00:37:12,560 --> 00:37:15,440
Speaker 2: I really dont Does that make sense?

799
00:37:16,920 --> 00:37:19,120
Speaker 1: Yeah? Why do you? Because when you attract people who

800
00:37:19,160 --> 00:37:21,440
Speaker 1: are just like not great over and over again, you

801
00:37:21,560 --> 00:37:23,960
Speaker 1: have to look at like, what is it about me

802
00:37:24,239 --> 00:37:29,200
Speaker 1: that's allowing this type of person into my life, you know,

803
00:37:29,640 --> 00:37:32,919
Speaker 1: and I'm the type where my guard is completely down

804
00:37:33,560 --> 00:37:35,759
Speaker 1: when I meet new people. I'm not damaged that well, no,

805
00:37:35,840 --> 00:37:39,360
Speaker 1: I'm damaged. But before it was like, let's do this,

806
00:37:40,200 --> 00:37:41,719
Speaker 1: and then when you do me wrong is when the

807
00:37:41,760 --> 00:37:44,480
Speaker 1: guard goes up. So I never allow myself to sit

808
00:37:44,520 --> 00:37:47,879
Speaker 1: there and go When you earn things, then you get

809
00:37:48,000 --> 00:37:51,520
Speaker 1: a part of me. I give it all, and then

810
00:37:51,920 --> 00:37:54,360
Speaker 1: when you show me something that I don't like or

811
00:37:54,400 --> 00:37:57,560
Speaker 1: you do me dirty, then it's like a very quick

812
00:37:57,680 --> 00:38:01,040
Speaker 1: like I'm done, Like I feel so betrayed. That makes sense,

813
00:38:01,360 --> 00:38:01,960
Speaker 1: completely made.

814
00:38:01,960 --> 00:38:03,120
Speaker 3: Both of y'all make complete sense.

815
00:38:03,160 --> 00:38:06,879
Speaker 1: I feel like this is your podcasting, but I'm taking

816
00:38:06,920 --> 00:38:08,880
Speaker 1: advantage of the fact that you do what you do

817
00:38:09,200 --> 00:38:10,920
Speaker 1: to fix me on this podcast.

818
00:38:11,880 --> 00:38:13,759
Speaker 3: Well, we're gonna give that. We're gonna put the energy

819
00:38:13,800 --> 00:38:16,120
Speaker 3: back in your seat. I'm just gonna say, what respond

820
00:38:16,160 --> 00:38:19,000
Speaker 3: to what you said, Jessica, Yeah, my grandma'd be dating

821
00:38:19,000 --> 00:38:20,200
Speaker 3: some ugly ass dudes too, so.

822
00:38:22,160 --> 00:38:24,040
Speaker 1: Me and your grandma should go out and troll together.

823
00:38:24,840 --> 00:38:26,759
Speaker 1: We anting I.

824
00:38:26,760 --> 00:38:28,719
Speaker 3: Would be like, hey, why are you getting.

825
00:38:28,440 --> 00:38:30,040
Speaker 1: It, ugliest dude?

826
00:38:30,239 --> 00:38:30,520
Speaker 3: Come on?

827
00:38:30,840 --> 00:38:31,920
Speaker 1: But she has her reasons.

828
00:38:32,040 --> 00:38:34,640
Speaker 3: No, And you know, a dude gotta be like for

829
00:38:35,360 --> 00:38:37,399
Speaker 3: I'm a straight mail, right, and so for a straight

830
00:38:37,480 --> 00:38:40,880
Speaker 3: mail to talk about another man's looks, that man has

831
00:38:40,920 --> 00:38:46,040
Speaker 3: to be extremely uly or extremely good looking, Like, yeah,

832
00:38:46,160 --> 00:38:49,600
Speaker 3: you can't just be like three to a eight. You

833
00:38:49,680 --> 00:38:51,239
Speaker 3: gotta be like on the extreme side.

834
00:38:51,440 --> 00:38:56,000
Speaker 1: Totally. That's very true. So she's dating some ugly but

835
00:38:56,160 --> 00:38:57,880
Speaker 1: she's I bet she has her reasons.

836
00:38:58,040 --> 00:38:59,960
Speaker 2: No, Is it because they're kind or funnier?

837
00:39:00,120 --> 00:39:00,400
Speaker 1: Something?

838
00:39:01,320 --> 00:39:03,239
Speaker 3: They are kind? Yeah, I appreciate the way that they

839
00:39:03,280 --> 00:39:05,239
Speaker 3: treat her. Then I get to listen to I grew

840
00:39:05,320 --> 00:39:07,120
Speaker 3: up with three women, of course, and so we got

841
00:39:07,160 --> 00:39:10,279
Speaker 3: that woman trongness in the household. And I'm like, damn,

842
00:39:10,320 --> 00:39:11,520
Speaker 3: this is how you'all feel about man? Okay?

843
00:39:12,120 --> 00:39:13,319
Speaker 1: Can I tell you what I've learned?

844
00:39:13,920 --> 00:39:14,480
Speaker 3: Yes? Please?

845
00:39:15,120 --> 00:39:18,640
Speaker 1: Ugly men will do you the dirtiest, especially an ugly

846
00:39:18,719 --> 00:39:21,120
Speaker 1: man who's come into like maybe like a little bit

847
00:39:21,160 --> 00:39:23,399
Speaker 1: of money. Run.

848
00:39:25,680 --> 00:39:27,960
Speaker 3: Is that the equivalent of a person that was once

849
00:39:28,080 --> 00:39:30,400
Speaker 3: a beste that got in super shape?

850
00:39:31,640 --> 00:39:33,839
Speaker 1: Is that the equivalent would you say, an ugly man

851
00:39:33,920 --> 00:39:34,600
Speaker 1: coming into money?

852
00:39:35,000 --> 00:39:35,200
Speaker 3: Yeah?

853
00:39:35,920 --> 00:39:39,000
Speaker 1: I don't know. Oh, I haven't thought about that either.

854
00:39:39,400 --> 00:39:41,000
Speaker 1: I also don't want to refund anybody.

855
00:39:42,320 --> 00:39:44,040
Speaker 2: No, but you know what the thing about that is.

856
00:39:44,680 --> 00:39:47,520
Speaker 2: For the record, Well, I had a friend in high

857
00:39:47,560 --> 00:39:50,800
Speaker 2: school who was obese and then got great shape and

858
00:39:51,040 --> 00:39:55,400
Speaker 2: he was like the kindest to women, the funniest. And

859
00:39:55,520 --> 00:39:57,640
Speaker 2: it's because even when he lost the w yes, he

860
00:39:57,719 --> 00:39:58,720
Speaker 2: didn't become an asshole.

861
00:39:58,760 --> 00:40:00,960
Speaker 3: I'll see talking about the thing aspect. I want to

862
00:40:01,040 --> 00:40:04,279
Speaker 3: compliment that individual, right because I think when you go

863
00:40:04,440 --> 00:40:07,239
Speaker 3: from no attention to a lot of attention despite what

864
00:40:07,320 --> 00:40:08,560
Speaker 3: it is, So I'm not coming at noone. They could

865
00:40:08,560 --> 00:40:11,160
Speaker 3: feel how they want to feel. It's the internet, but y'all,

866
00:40:11,480 --> 00:40:12,840
Speaker 3: the three of us know what I'm talking about. Like,

867
00:40:13,239 --> 00:40:15,360
Speaker 3: I commend those individuals because they going from having no

868
00:40:15,480 --> 00:40:17,960
Speaker 3: attention to getting all of the attention. It's like the

869
00:40:18,040 --> 00:40:20,120
Speaker 3: two things that show you who you truly are are

870
00:40:20,320 --> 00:40:22,040
Speaker 3: getting acts to a lot of money, getting asks to

871
00:40:22,080 --> 00:40:24,120
Speaker 3: a lot of alcohol in or drugs. Right, and then

872
00:40:24,120 --> 00:40:26,160
Speaker 3: therefore we can change that. And I know you probably

873
00:40:26,200 --> 00:40:27,960
Speaker 3: have something to say to that part. And I think

874
00:40:28,040 --> 00:40:30,960
Speaker 3: that when you go from having no attention to a

875
00:40:31,040 --> 00:40:34,279
Speaker 3: lot of attention, it's definitely commendable when you could still

876
00:40:34,320 --> 00:40:35,560
Speaker 3: be a wonderful human being.

877
00:40:37,160 --> 00:40:38,839
Speaker 1: Yeah, I know, I don't feel like we give enough

878
00:40:38,880 --> 00:40:41,319
Speaker 1: credit to people who are like in these streets being kind, right.

879
00:40:41,640 --> 00:40:42,680
Speaker 3: We don't. We truly don't.

880
00:40:43,000 --> 00:40:44,840
Speaker 1: I feel like last podcast we gave a lot of

881
00:40:44,880 --> 00:40:46,840
Speaker 1: credit to people who were just like being nice. Today

882
00:40:46,920 --> 00:40:49,719
Speaker 1: we did, right. So sad that we live in a

883
00:40:49,800 --> 00:40:53,719
Speaker 1: world where I fact like, if you're swinging good dick

884
00:40:53,800 --> 00:40:56,960
Speaker 1: and you're still nice after that, I want to meet

885
00:40:57,000 --> 00:40:59,920
Speaker 1: you and give you a gold star. So let's talk

886
00:41:00,040 --> 00:41:03,319
Speaker 1: about this. Do you feel like you're in your head

887
00:41:03,520 --> 00:41:05,840
Speaker 1: because you know so much, you have so much knowledge

888
00:41:05,840 --> 00:41:08,360
Speaker 1: when it comes to this that do you kind of

889
00:41:08,440 --> 00:41:10,959
Speaker 1: like mind fuck yourself when you're out in the world

890
00:41:11,160 --> 00:41:13,880
Speaker 1: dating and trying to find a partner undred percent not.

891
00:41:13,920 --> 00:41:16,759
Speaker 3: Gonna lie about it, one hundred percent when specifically when

892
00:41:16,760 --> 00:41:18,120
Speaker 3: I'm in the bedroom and it's someone that I really

893
00:41:18,160 --> 00:41:19,880
Speaker 3: care about, someone I like. I spoke about this on

894
00:41:19,960 --> 00:41:23,719
Speaker 3: My Homegirl sham bou Duran's podcast. I've definitely had time

895
00:41:23,760 --> 00:41:25,560
Speaker 3: to where I get in my head because I know

896
00:41:25,640 --> 00:41:28,239
Speaker 3: how women look at men and judgment and don't have

897
00:41:28,239 --> 00:41:29,759
Speaker 3: a lot of respect for us, and I know the

898
00:41:29,800 --> 00:41:32,400
Speaker 3: statistics and all this stuff, and then me, I'm like, yo,

899
00:41:32,480 --> 00:41:34,359
Speaker 3: I do want your body. I am I am man,

900
00:41:34,719 --> 00:41:36,359
Speaker 3: I definitely want to have sex. I need to stop

901
00:41:36,400 --> 00:41:37,920
Speaker 3: saying it, because women want to have sex as much

902
00:41:37,920 --> 00:41:41,600
Speaker 3: as men do, and if not more. And I do

903
00:41:41,719 --> 00:41:43,120
Speaker 3: get in my head because I want to. I do

904
00:41:43,239 --> 00:41:46,239
Speaker 3: want to engage in this activity, but I don't want

905
00:41:46,280 --> 00:41:48,640
Speaker 3: it to change the way you think I may feel

906
00:41:48,640 --> 00:41:49,000
Speaker 3: about you.

907
00:41:49,360 --> 00:41:52,239
Speaker 1: Okay, like once you hit then you're like disconnected.

908
00:41:52,680 --> 00:41:54,799
Speaker 3: I don't want her to feel that way, but her

909
00:41:55,040 --> 00:41:57,320
Speaker 3: history and or a capacit experience may tell her that.

910
00:41:57,520 --> 00:42:00,399
Speaker 3: And then I get in my head overthinking it too much.

911
00:42:00,719 --> 00:42:03,480
Speaker 1: Right, So when you hear chicks, like when you're getting

912
00:42:03,520 --> 00:42:06,000
Speaker 1: to know a chick, are their little red flags that

913
00:42:06,040 --> 00:42:07,839
Speaker 1: you're like, no, no, no, I can't even go there.

914
00:42:08,120 --> 00:42:10,320
Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean one that we all use, like we

915
00:42:10,440 --> 00:42:14,200
Speaker 3: going to dinner day. And personally, if I were to

916
00:42:14,239 --> 00:42:15,480
Speaker 3: do it first date, I would not want it to

917
00:42:15,480 --> 00:42:16,680
Speaker 3: be a dinner day or a movie.

918
00:42:17,320 --> 00:42:18,160
Speaker 1: But what would it be?

919
00:42:18,800 --> 00:42:21,360
Speaker 3: So I live in Austin, I like, I like you

920
00:42:21,440 --> 00:42:23,800
Speaker 3: to wear some jeans and your tea crop top. Be comfortable,

921
00:42:23,840 --> 00:42:27,480
Speaker 3: really comfortable, cozy, got it comfortable cozy. We might take

922
00:42:27,480 --> 00:42:29,719
Speaker 3: the scooters, we might go walk around the park. We

923
00:42:29,800 --> 00:42:32,840
Speaker 3: might go grab a bite to eat. I might I

924
00:42:32,960 --> 00:42:34,680
Speaker 3: might have someone to come out. If we're at the park,

925
00:42:34,719 --> 00:42:36,360
Speaker 3: I might have someone bring out some wine, like a

926
00:42:36,440 --> 00:42:39,719
Speaker 3: Butler style, just something really cool, like we're very chill.

927
00:42:39,760 --> 00:42:41,040
Speaker 3: But then I got one of the homies dressed up

928
00:42:41,040 --> 00:42:47,480
Speaker 3: in the tucks, right, some vibes like that, just something different.

929
00:42:47,840 --> 00:42:50,399
Speaker 1: What was your question? I was asking, like, what when

930
00:42:50,440 --> 00:42:53,520
Speaker 1: you're with someone getting to know her, Like what the

931
00:42:53,640 --> 00:42:54,160
Speaker 1: red flags?

932
00:42:54,200 --> 00:42:55,800
Speaker 3: Oh? Yeah, so one red flag that I think we

933
00:42:55,920 --> 00:42:58,960
Speaker 3: all know depend on how you treat the white staff.

934
00:43:00,280 --> 00:43:03,200
Speaker 3: I can't deal with that shit. No, Like in my personality,

935
00:43:03,800 --> 00:43:05,440
Speaker 3: I'm very strong.

936
00:43:06,200 --> 00:43:06,839
Speaker 1: Where are you from.

937
00:43:07,000 --> 00:43:08,320
Speaker 3: I'm from Dallas, Okay.

938
00:43:08,440 --> 00:43:11,000
Speaker 1: So you're Texas boys, So you have manners all right?

939
00:43:11,280 --> 00:43:13,560
Speaker 3: Yeah? Well I lived all around the world and yeah,

940
00:43:13,560 --> 00:43:14,800
Speaker 3: I think I got a little bit of everything.

941
00:43:15,080 --> 00:43:17,840
Speaker 1: Yeah, you're well rounded. But I just I find that

942
00:43:18,320 --> 00:43:21,200
Speaker 1: I like men from Texas, not all of them, the

943
00:43:21,280 --> 00:43:25,000
Speaker 1: ones I've encountered. They just I've found that there's something

944
00:43:25,160 --> 00:43:27,200
Speaker 1: sweet in their soul. I don't know what their mamas did,

945
00:43:27,280 --> 00:43:29,640
Speaker 1: but they did something right. I'm from Utah, so like

946
00:43:30,200 --> 00:43:33,240
Speaker 1: it's a little different, but we got them Mormon roots,

947
00:43:33,960 --> 00:43:36,680
Speaker 1: so we're like, we love that Father. I'm not Mormon,

948
00:43:37,000 --> 00:43:39,800
Speaker 1: but we're like treat everyone the way you want to

949
00:43:39,840 --> 00:43:40,240
Speaker 1: be treated.

950
00:43:40,800 --> 00:43:42,600
Speaker 3: Utah and me being a sex coach, there's a lot

951
00:43:42,640 --> 00:43:47,200
Speaker 3: of people with a trauma from purity purity culture.

952
00:43:47,640 --> 00:43:48,680
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, it's intense.

953
00:43:48,800 --> 00:43:50,560
Speaker 3: A lot of trauma from that, which I don't think

954
00:43:50,640 --> 00:43:51,600
Speaker 3: gets spoken about a lot.

955
00:43:52,160 --> 00:43:54,479
Speaker 1: Well, that church will make sure it's not spoken about.

956
00:43:54,960 --> 00:43:57,080
Speaker 3: Well, I'm here to fuck up.

957
00:43:57,520 --> 00:44:01,040
Speaker 1: Fu shit up. That's the one thing raised in Utah.

958
00:44:01,120 --> 00:44:04,200
Speaker 1: I was not raised Mormon. I had zero I want

959
00:44:04,239 --> 00:44:07,120
Speaker 1: to say, like religion. I don't want to say that

960
00:44:07,160 --> 00:44:09,759
Speaker 1: I had zero, but it was much more spiritual than anything, right,

961
00:44:10,239 --> 00:44:12,320
Speaker 1: because I had my mom who was like raising a

962
00:44:12,440 --> 00:44:16,839
Speaker 1: very Christian household. Were you raised Christian? Yes, I assume so, right,

963
00:44:18,640 --> 00:44:20,840
Speaker 1: and then like very heavy on God in the Bible.

964
00:44:20,920 --> 00:44:22,839
Speaker 1: And then my dad was raised Mormon. So I think

965
00:44:22,880 --> 00:44:25,920
Speaker 1: they were both kind of scarred. But there is that

966
00:44:26,120 --> 00:44:27,839
Speaker 1: thing in Utah where I'm sure a lot of people

967
00:44:27,920 --> 00:44:29,320
Speaker 1: come to you and they have to deal with like

968
00:44:29,400 --> 00:44:31,040
Speaker 1: the guilt that that church puts on them.

969
00:44:31,520 --> 00:44:34,040
Speaker 3: That's I would say one of the top three reasons

970
00:44:34,080 --> 00:44:37,120
Speaker 3: that I've seen that women have a hard time with orgasm.

971
00:44:37,520 --> 00:44:41,160
Speaker 1: They feel like it's bad what ye oh oh, no,

972
00:44:41,840 --> 00:44:45,239
Speaker 1: like shame. There's like a blockage. Oh no, honey, can

973
00:44:45,320 --> 00:44:48,520
Speaker 1: I tell you yes? Because purity right, like I got that,

974
00:44:48,600 --> 00:44:51,279
Speaker 1: I don't have that purity whatever. But like if I

975
00:44:51,320 --> 00:44:52,919
Speaker 1: were living in Utah and I'm like, I don't drink,

976
00:44:52,920 --> 00:44:54,759
Speaker 1: people are gonna be like, use a Mormon. But it's

977
00:44:54,800 --> 00:44:56,960
Speaker 1: just I will burn your motherfucking house down if you

978
00:44:57,080 --> 00:45:00,919
Speaker 1: give me a bod casda right now? Okay. But since

979
00:45:00,960 --> 00:45:05,400
Speaker 1: I got sober, sex is different. I feel like a

980
00:45:05,480 --> 00:45:06,000
Speaker 1: new person.

981
00:45:06,360 --> 00:45:09,200
Speaker 3: That's what's up. I'm happy for your you know, I

982
00:45:09,320 --> 00:45:13,680
Speaker 3: have a hard time watching uh porn now over like

983
00:45:13,680 --> 00:45:16,880
Speaker 3: the last three, four, five, six months is because and

984
00:45:16,960 --> 00:45:20,040
Speaker 3: it's only getting worse and worse because I'll be looking

985
00:45:20,080 --> 00:45:23,239
Speaker 3: at these artists and I'm like, bro, you ain't hitting

986
00:45:23,239 --> 00:45:25,360
Speaker 3: it right. I'm looking at the dude aspect right.

987
00:45:25,440 --> 00:45:28,080
Speaker 1: Oh so you are upset about the way they're hitting it.

988
00:45:28,160 --> 00:45:29,400
Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm like, bro, you ain't heitting it right now.

989
00:45:29,440 --> 00:45:31,960
Speaker 3: She's doing her job, she acting of course. I'm like, hommy,

990
00:45:32,040 --> 00:45:36,399
Speaker 3: like you teaching all these men to like like beat

991
00:45:36,440 --> 00:45:39,520
Speaker 3: it up like a jack rabbit. Youah, like a jack

992
00:45:39,600 --> 00:45:40,279
Speaker 3: rabbit when you're not.

993
00:45:40,480 --> 00:45:42,319
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's making love.

994
00:45:42,920 --> 00:45:49,120
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's bomb bomb rather than making the love you want? Yes,

995
00:45:49,480 --> 00:45:51,800
Speaker 2: bringing it all back. Is this about sex?

996
00:45:52,160 --> 00:45:53,759
Speaker 1: No, okay, it's all about love.

997
00:45:54,200 --> 00:45:56,200
Speaker 3: It's all about self love self.

998
00:45:57,280 --> 00:45:59,200
Speaker 1: Oh, this is going to be amazing to it. But

999
00:45:59,280 --> 00:46:01,239
Speaker 1: if after I read this book, I just bagged me

1000
00:46:01,280 --> 00:46:02,560
Speaker 1: a man, and then I owe it all to you?

1001
00:46:03,480 --> 00:46:04,800
Speaker 2: Or maybe Mike, are you single?

1002
00:46:05,440 --> 00:46:07,920
Speaker 1: Wait? But you did go on a date with Meghan King? Right?

1003
00:46:08,280 --> 00:46:09,239
Speaker 3: Yes? Megan is?

1004
00:46:09,440 --> 00:46:12,800
Speaker 1: Yes, like she's great in the iHeart the iHeart Awards.

1005
00:46:12,920 --> 00:46:17,799
Speaker 3: Oh I thought you heart Megan too. I heart Megan? Yes.

1006
00:46:18,440 --> 00:46:21,600
Speaker 1: But it was music, Yes, I love that for you.

1007
00:46:22,200 --> 00:46:22,399
Speaker 4: Yeah.

1008
00:46:22,960 --> 00:46:26,239
Speaker 3: So the way that when I date for me, it's

1009
00:46:26,640 --> 00:46:29,080
Speaker 3: for myself. I do a three month checking right, So

1010
00:46:30,040 --> 00:46:31,600
Speaker 3: every three months I'm like, man, what have I done

1011
00:46:31,640 --> 00:46:32,160
Speaker 3: for her lately?

1012
00:46:32,560 --> 00:46:32,840
Speaker 1: Okay?

1013
00:46:33,280 --> 00:46:35,759
Speaker 3: Right, that's something I do for myself. And then it's

1014
00:46:35,840 --> 00:46:37,839
Speaker 3: just all about the energy. How does she make me feel?

1015
00:46:38,960 --> 00:46:39,000
Speaker 1: Like?

1016
00:46:39,120 --> 00:46:39,919
Speaker 3: Is she making me grow?

1017
00:46:40,000 --> 00:46:40,040
Speaker 1: She?

1018
00:46:40,239 --> 00:46:42,600
Speaker 3: Is she putting me in check? Okay, so that she

1019
00:46:42,760 --> 00:46:44,320
Speaker 3: knows I've told her my goals. Does she put me

1020
00:46:44,360 --> 00:46:46,480
Speaker 3: in check when I'm falling off in a respectful way?

1021
00:46:46,520 --> 00:46:48,719
Speaker 3: Like I respect the way that she puts me in check? Right? Okay,

1022
00:46:48,840 --> 00:46:50,320
Speaker 3: these are things that I'm looking for you know, I

1023
00:46:50,360 --> 00:46:52,279
Speaker 3: mean besides I, of course all the other stuff, right,

1024
00:46:52,960 --> 00:46:54,399
Speaker 3: I don't look at it like is this the person?

1025
00:46:54,440 --> 00:46:56,520
Speaker 3: The one I look at it is this person and

1026
00:46:56,640 --> 00:46:59,160
Speaker 3: my loving art energy together, right, and my loving being

1027
00:46:59,200 --> 00:47:02,360
Speaker 3: with this person, and I loving having themost respect for

1028
00:47:02,440 --> 00:47:04,600
Speaker 3: this person, and I like those are type of those

1029
00:47:04,600 --> 00:47:06,680
Speaker 3: are things out of questioned, right. And then for myself,

1030
00:47:06,680 --> 00:47:08,319
Speaker 3: I'm like, yeoh, what have I done for this girl lately?

1031
00:47:08,680 --> 00:47:10,279
Speaker 1: So every three months you go through that.

1032
00:47:10,360 --> 00:47:13,359
Speaker 3: List, ain't like exactly three months. It's like a mental thing, right.

1033
00:47:13,600 --> 00:47:15,759
Speaker 1: Right, And then how long do you do that?

1034
00:47:16,480 --> 00:47:18,880
Speaker 3: That's the foreverything. Like if I'm married to you, for

1035
00:47:19,640 --> 00:47:22,880
Speaker 3: you for the next eighty three years, that's a continual thing.

1036
00:47:22,880 --> 00:47:24,439
Speaker 3: I always gotta date you. I always got to always

1037
00:47:24,440 --> 00:47:25,160
Speaker 3: gotta eat the cookie.

1038
00:47:25,239 --> 00:47:31,239
Speaker 1: Right, Yeah, you better be take your dentures out, give

1039
00:47:31,280 --> 00:47:32,080
Speaker 1: me a little gummage.

1040
00:47:32,440 --> 00:47:35,200
Speaker 3: You might like you might like that more honestly.

1041
00:47:35,880 --> 00:47:38,400
Speaker 1: Yeah, of course you wouldn't, because a lot of these dudes.

1042
00:47:38,280 --> 00:47:40,160
Speaker 3: Out here a little week that's a course coming soon.

1043
00:47:40,880 --> 00:47:41,400
Speaker 3: Oh you.

1044
00:47:41,520 --> 00:47:43,400
Speaker 1: It's like jaws out in these streets with people who

1045
00:47:43,440 --> 00:47:47,120
Speaker 1: don't know what the right not Jaws out in these

1046
00:47:47,120 --> 00:47:51,640
Speaker 1: streets breaks me out, get away. And also if your

1047
00:47:51,719 --> 00:47:54,280
Speaker 1: brethday and right, you're not going near my cookie.

1048
00:47:54,400 --> 00:47:55,879
Speaker 3: This is fact. But I gotta talk about the letty.

1049
00:47:55,920 --> 00:47:58,600
Speaker 3: So y'all can't just be coming on the entirety of men,

1050
00:47:58,840 --> 00:48:00,040
Speaker 3: like what about these dead bed when.

1051
00:48:02,040 --> 00:48:04,480
Speaker 1: The like starfish?

1052
00:48:04,600 --> 00:48:08,000
Speaker 3: Yeah, starfishing? Yeah, totally Like you can't be doing that either. Now,

1053
00:48:08,400 --> 00:48:11,560
Speaker 3: come on out, Okay, I didn't charge you up. What's

1054
00:48:11,560 --> 00:48:11,800
Speaker 3: going on?

1055
00:48:12,040 --> 00:48:13,480
Speaker 1: Let's move That is very true.

1056
00:48:13,680 --> 00:48:16,000
Speaker 3: So you know, it's things on both sides. Everybody can

1057
00:48:16,040 --> 00:48:16,239
Speaker 3: work on.

1058
00:48:16,560 --> 00:48:19,640
Speaker 1: Everyone can work on something. Absolutely, I love it. This

1059
00:48:19,880 --> 00:48:22,239
Speaker 1: was really fun. I enjoyed having you on. Thank you

1060
00:48:22,360 --> 00:48:24,359
Speaker 1: so much for joining me on my podcast. I can't

1061
00:48:24,400 --> 00:48:27,480
Speaker 1: wait to read your book, Making the Love you Want.

1062
00:48:28,719 --> 00:48:30,000
Speaker 2: Oh and where can we find you?

1063
00:48:30,600 --> 00:48:33,200
Speaker 1: Obviously? I know you plugged your website, but where is

1064
00:48:33,239 --> 00:48:34,040
Speaker 1: the website again?

1065
00:48:34,760 --> 00:48:37,719
Speaker 3: Just check out feelingscene dot com. The landing page is

1066
00:48:38,040 --> 00:48:41,080
Speaker 3: going to be refreshed very soon because when I made

1067
00:48:41,080 --> 00:48:43,520
Speaker 3: it I was a little inebriated, so therefore it be

1068
00:48:43,560 --> 00:48:44,000
Speaker 3: coming soon.

1069
00:48:45,480 --> 00:48:48,120
Speaker 2: And then your Instagram is at Mike Johnson.

1070
00:48:48,160 --> 00:48:50,719
Speaker 3: Mike Underscore Johnson, just Mike Johnson. You can find me

1071
00:48:50,760 --> 00:48:52,239
Speaker 3: on there. I'm like the only black dude on named

1072
00:48:52,280 --> 00:48:53,200
Speaker 3: Mike Johnson pop star.

1073
00:48:53,920 --> 00:48:55,640
Speaker 1: I actually had a best friend in high school who

1074
00:48:55,680 --> 00:49:00,520
Speaker 1: was blackman Mike Johnson. Oh so just saying, I.

1075
00:49:00,520 --> 00:49:02,480
Speaker 3: Mean, I'm sure you have. Michael Johnson is a very

1076
00:49:02,520 --> 00:49:05,040
Speaker 3: popular name, but at the same time, it is ida

1077
00:49:05,120 --> 00:49:05,640
Speaker 3: Mike Johnson.

1078
00:49:07,160 --> 00:49:09,040
Speaker 1: I love it, and thank you, my love for listening

1079
00:49:09,080 --> 00:49:11,160
Speaker 1: to another episode of You Give Them Mala podcast and

1080
00:49:11,200 --> 00:49:12,600
Speaker 1: I will catch you next week.