1 00:00:16,239 --> 00:00:18,280 Speaker 1: I do Part two. 2 00:00:18,560 --> 00:00:20,000 Speaker 2: I'm back. 3 00:00:20,480 --> 00:00:26,480 Speaker 3: It's your celebrity mentor and single gal, Kelly ben Simone. 4 00:00:26,600 --> 00:00:28,600 Speaker 1: I'm so excited today because I'm going. 5 00:00:28,440 --> 00:00:30,960 Speaker 3: To chat with a writer who's been featured in the 6 00:00:31,080 --> 00:00:34,519 Speaker 3: Huffington Post, Vogue, Oprah Daily, and she's got a monthly 7 00:00:34,640 --> 00:00:37,640 Speaker 3: column in play Girl magazine. 8 00:00:37,720 --> 00:00:38,640 Speaker 1: She's a woman. 9 00:00:38,440 --> 00:00:41,519 Speaker 3: Behind the viral TikTok account where she does woman on 10 00:00:41,640 --> 00:00:47,000 Speaker 3: the street conversations with real men called anthropology. 11 00:00:47,280 --> 00:00:48,839 Speaker 1: You cannot make this up. 12 00:00:49,280 --> 00:00:54,680 Speaker 4: It's Holly Sulm Hey, Holly, Hi, how are you. 13 00:00:55,200 --> 00:00:57,880 Speaker 1: I'm well, we got the memo. We're both wearing blocked. 14 00:00:58,440 --> 00:01:02,880 Speaker 2: Of course, all the all the cool little girls are all. 15 00:01:02,760 --> 00:01:07,840 Speaker 3: The cool girls. Yeah, how are you excited to meet you? 16 00:01:08,200 --> 00:01:10,720 Speaker 3: I'm I'm Kelly ben Simone. I I know that you're 17 00:01:10,720 --> 00:01:13,760 Speaker 3: your next model because you're really gorgeous. So we're not 18 00:01:13,800 --> 00:01:15,080 Speaker 3: going to talk about modeling. 19 00:01:14,840 --> 00:01:15,360 Speaker 1: But we are. 20 00:01:15,800 --> 00:01:17,360 Speaker 2: I'm so excited to meet you too. 21 00:01:17,560 --> 00:01:20,880 Speaker 5: I've I've see I've watched you on TV. It's so 22 00:01:21,000 --> 00:01:22,880 Speaker 5: great to meet you. I'm a fan. 23 00:01:23,600 --> 00:01:25,959 Speaker 3: Oh my god, I'm oh my god, I'm a fan 24 00:01:26,080 --> 00:01:29,600 Speaker 3: your Oh my god, your TikTok is Literally I was like, 25 00:01:29,680 --> 00:01:31,720 Speaker 3: I was I just moved into a new apartment and 26 00:01:31,800 --> 00:01:34,200 Speaker 3: I was I was listening to them and I literally 27 00:01:34,319 --> 00:01:37,600 Speaker 3: is almost crying. I was like, this girl is amazing. 28 00:01:38,080 --> 00:01:40,080 Speaker 3: Oh my god, you are so funny. 29 00:01:40,280 --> 00:01:40,679 Speaker 2: Thank you. 30 00:01:41,440 --> 00:01:44,399 Speaker 3: Let's get into it, Holly, because you get a lot 31 00:01:44,480 --> 00:01:45,640 Speaker 3: to talk about. 32 00:01:45,520 --> 00:01:51,680 Speaker 4: I'm sure to say, yeah, I want to know everything. 33 00:01:53,160 --> 00:01:57,160 Speaker 3: So you're making this really really interesting content which is 34 00:01:57,160 --> 00:02:00,480 Speaker 3: thought provoking on the Internet and just literally on the street, 35 00:02:00,560 --> 00:02:06,200 Speaker 3: simply asking men why they are the way they all. 36 00:02:08,160 --> 00:02:10,520 Speaker 4: Yeah, how did you start making this content? 37 00:02:10,720 --> 00:02:14,679 Speaker 5: Yeah, it's it's a very simple question, but ilicit's very 38 00:02:14,720 --> 00:02:15,760 Speaker 5: strong reaction. 39 00:02:16,639 --> 00:02:16,880 Speaker 2: Right. 40 00:02:17,560 --> 00:02:21,720 Speaker 5: I'm a writer and so I was just like writing 41 00:02:21,720 --> 00:02:26,000 Speaker 5: about my life very quietly, behind the scenes. Yeah, And 42 00:02:26,200 --> 00:02:30,760 Speaker 5: my lit agent was like, you should start, you know, 43 00:02:30,919 --> 00:02:34,119 Speaker 5: putting yourself on camera more build up your social media profile. 44 00:02:34,480 --> 00:02:37,840 Speaker 2: It'll help to sell your book. So I started like. 45 00:02:37,880 --> 00:02:40,120 Speaker 5: Kind of talking to the camera about what I was 46 00:02:40,120 --> 00:02:42,440 Speaker 5: writing and about what I was going through, and by 47 00:02:42,520 --> 00:02:46,079 Speaker 5: about about my girl life, being a girl, being a woman. 48 00:02:46,639 --> 00:02:51,040 Speaker 5: And it got like inundated with men, Like I got 49 00:02:51,080 --> 00:02:55,000 Speaker 5: all these male followers and they just they started sort 50 00:02:55,040 --> 00:02:58,200 Speaker 5: of infiltrating all of my socials, my sub stack and 51 00:02:58,280 --> 00:03:01,560 Speaker 5: my Instagram my TikTok, like it was just all men, 52 00:03:01,639 --> 00:03:04,320 Speaker 5: and I was like, ah, why are all these men here? 53 00:03:04,400 --> 00:03:08,760 Speaker 2: Like right, this isn't it's not for you. But after 54 00:03:08,800 --> 00:03:10,360 Speaker 2: a while I realized. 55 00:03:09,960 --> 00:03:13,679 Speaker 5: Like there's something here, like if I appeal to men, 56 00:03:13,760 --> 00:03:14,480 Speaker 5: maybe I should. 57 00:03:14,600 --> 00:03:16,840 Speaker 2: I should do something with this, I should lean into it. 58 00:03:17,280 --> 00:03:19,240 Speaker 5: So I thought it would be funny to make a 59 00:03:19,320 --> 00:03:22,840 Speaker 5: show for men. And then I was like, people just 60 00:03:22,880 --> 00:03:25,880 Speaker 5: want to see themselves represented. That's what we're all interested in. 61 00:03:26,040 --> 00:03:29,799 Speaker 5: So I thought, I'll just interview men about being men 62 00:03:30,080 --> 00:03:32,840 Speaker 5: and it'll be kind of like a funny, a funny bit. 63 00:03:33,040 --> 00:03:36,600 Speaker 5: So it started kind of just as a joke, and 64 00:03:36,640 --> 00:03:39,840 Speaker 5: like I just started going around town like with my 65 00:03:40,320 --> 00:03:43,360 Speaker 5: phone and like a bad microphone and just being like. 66 00:03:43,320 --> 00:03:45,680 Speaker 2: Hey, I'm asking men, why are you like this? 67 00:03:45,800 --> 00:03:49,960 Speaker 5: And asking them dumb questions about being men, and it 68 00:03:50,480 --> 00:03:52,120 Speaker 5: just kind of like weirdly took. 69 00:03:53,720 --> 00:03:54,520 Speaker 1: I love that. 70 00:03:55,120 --> 00:03:58,680 Speaker 3: I love when things happen organically and you can just 71 00:03:58,800 --> 00:04:01,960 Speaker 3: really tell that you were literally just walking up to 72 00:04:02,000 --> 00:04:05,119 Speaker 3: these guys and being like, tell me why you won't 73 00:04:05,200 --> 00:04:08,400 Speaker 3: date an old woman, Like tell me why you're you'res 74 00:04:08,440 --> 00:04:11,120 Speaker 3: in your late fifties and your age range is like 75 00:04:11,440 --> 00:04:12,360 Speaker 3: twenty two. 76 00:04:12,320 --> 00:04:18,520 Speaker 5: To thirty what so much of this stuff too, I 77 00:04:18,600 --> 00:04:23,360 Speaker 5: just like stumble upon, like someone like the age rage range. 78 00:04:23,400 --> 00:04:25,720 Speaker 2: Things started because like one guy said. 79 00:04:25,480 --> 00:04:27,599 Speaker 5: Something about, oh, I was dating this woman she was 80 00:04:27,640 --> 00:04:30,280 Speaker 5: younger than me, and then I was like picked up 81 00:04:30,279 --> 00:04:30,560 Speaker 5: on it. 82 00:04:30,440 --> 00:04:32,560 Speaker 2: It was like why do you date younger women? 83 00:04:33,320 --> 00:04:36,120 Speaker 5: And then that just turned into like a question that 84 00:04:36,160 --> 00:04:37,840 Speaker 5: I regularly asked, like what are. 85 00:04:37,760 --> 00:04:39,599 Speaker 2: Your age ranges on your apps? 86 00:04:39,640 --> 00:04:42,240 Speaker 5: And then I'm like why, And then you know, it's 87 00:04:42,320 --> 00:04:44,599 Speaker 5: just feeds off of itself. 88 00:04:45,160 --> 00:04:49,280 Speaker 3: I love the age range so much because like the 89 00:04:49,360 --> 00:04:53,160 Speaker 3: way these guys respond and like, listen, I'm like, I'm 90 00:04:53,320 --> 00:04:56,359 Speaker 3: I love men, and I like find I'm a twin brother, 91 00:04:56,560 --> 00:05:00,560 Speaker 3: like I fend find men to be really fun. Yeah, 92 00:05:00,720 --> 00:05:06,160 Speaker 3: but I just was shocked at how they how they responded. 93 00:05:06,279 --> 00:05:08,719 Speaker 1: I mean, I just was like, I was shocked. 94 00:05:09,240 --> 00:05:12,960 Speaker 5: I love men too, so like people think I'm like 95 00:05:13,000 --> 00:05:17,080 Speaker 5: some angry feminists, I'm a feminist and I'm angry, but 96 00:05:17,120 --> 00:05:20,919 Speaker 5: I'm not mad really like at men in general. Like 97 00:05:20,960 --> 00:05:25,800 Speaker 5: I love men, but I have had, you know, as 98 00:05:25,839 --> 00:05:29,120 Speaker 5: a woman, a lot of weird experiences with them my 99 00:05:29,320 --> 00:05:34,000 Speaker 5: whole life, as we all have. And I just was 100 00:05:34,080 --> 00:05:39,680 Speaker 5: surprised by how like men treat me a certain way 101 00:05:39,720 --> 00:05:42,520 Speaker 5: in the world with no cameras, and I was surprised 102 00:05:42,520 --> 00:05:45,520 Speaker 5: that it actually seems like amplified when the cameras are on, 103 00:05:45,839 --> 00:05:50,080 Speaker 5: Like they're almost emboldened to be even weirder and like creepier. 104 00:05:50,640 --> 00:05:52,960 Speaker 5: So like, you know, getting hit on by a man 105 00:05:53,600 --> 00:05:56,720 Speaker 5: is not that crazy, but the fact that they're willing 106 00:05:56,800 --> 00:05:59,760 Speaker 5: to like do that on camera. I think a lot 107 00:05:59,800 --> 00:06:01,960 Speaker 5: of a lot of men too, like think I'm just 108 00:06:02,040 --> 00:06:04,479 Speaker 5: like a kid with a camera, Like they don't really 109 00:06:05,200 --> 00:06:07,800 Speaker 5: Now they're starting to catch on because people really are. 110 00:06:07,640 --> 00:06:10,880 Speaker 2: Seeing the show, but it's a lot of people would 111 00:06:10,880 --> 00:06:11,200 Speaker 2: be like. 112 00:06:11,120 --> 00:06:14,200 Speaker 5: Oh, is this your school project, And I'd be like, yeah, 113 00:06:14,760 --> 00:06:16,120 Speaker 5: it's still a project. 114 00:06:17,960 --> 00:06:24,560 Speaker 1: That way, I'm dead you know, that is hilarious. 115 00:06:26,040 --> 00:06:29,640 Speaker 3: So I mean, I just I still just I loved 116 00:06:29,640 --> 00:06:32,400 Speaker 3: what you just said about how like being you know, 117 00:06:32,400 --> 00:06:35,679 Speaker 3: having the camera, like you know, it's kind of amplifying their. 118 00:06:35,480 --> 00:06:38,280 Speaker 4: Reactions and you can see that. 119 00:06:39,000 --> 00:06:42,760 Speaker 3: I just feel like, you know, these online conversations like 120 00:06:42,839 --> 00:06:44,720 Speaker 3: they they are that you're having. 121 00:06:44,440 --> 00:06:45,560 Speaker 1: Are just like eye opening. 122 00:06:45,600 --> 00:06:48,960 Speaker 3: I mean, you're just you are you know, You're you're 123 00:06:48,960 --> 00:06:52,040 Speaker 3: saying things that women are thinking and I just feel like, 124 00:06:52,839 --> 00:06:53,599 Speaker 3: what do you think. 125 00:06:53,520 --> 00:06:56,440 Speaker 1: Just gets under men's skin? Like what is it? 126 00:06:57,680 --> 00:07:02,479 Speaker 2: So I'm sure sure you've heard the phrase. 127 00:07:03,560 --> 00:07:08,120 Speaker 5: A man's greatest fear is being humiliated, and a woman's 128 00:07:08,279 --> 00:07:12,640 Speaker 5: greatest fear is being like, you know, murdered by a man. 129 00:07:13,480 --> 00:07:18,640 Speaker 5: And I think this somehow like taps right directly into 130 00:07:18,680 --> 00:07:22,960 Speaker 5: the vein of that is a lot of these men 131 00:07:23,040 --> 00:07:27,400 Speaker 5: think I'm like intentionally trying to humiliate men, or they're 132 00:07:27,440 --> 00:07:30,560 Speaker 5: surprised by my line of questioning that I'm coming up 133 00:07:30,600 --> 00:07:32,680 Speaker 5: to them. They think maybe, oh, this girl's going to 134 00:07:32,760 --> 00:07:35,760 Speaker 5: like flirt with me, and then I'm like, why are 135 00:07:35,760 --> 00:07:39,680 Speaker 5: you like this? And like they think it's they think 136 00:07:39,680 --> 00:07:44,360 Speaker 5: I'm trying to embarrass them, and they just something in 137 00:07:44,400 --> 00:07:48,480 Speaker 5: them short circuits. It's not there's so many men that 138 00:07:48,560 --> 00:07:51,880 Speaker 5: are so cool and that are in on the joke 139 00:07:52,080 --> 00:07:56,760 Speaker 5: and that they think it's so funny and they're fans 140 00:07:56,800 --> 00:07:59,400 Speaker 5: of the show, but they're not the ones that go viral. 141 00:08:00,400 --> 00:08:03,920 Speaker 5: Like I put those videos up too. I'm like, you, guys, 142 00:08:04,000 --> 00:08:06,720 Speaker 5: there's plenty of cool guys out here just you know, 143 00:08:06,920 --> 00:08:10,120 Speaker 5: taking it all in stride, but yeah, the ones that 144 00:08:10,160 --> 00:08:12,600 Speaker 5: really blow up are the ones that get super upset 145 00:08:12,720 --> 00:08:14,400 Speaker 5: and like offended by. 146 00:08:14,520 --> 00:08:17,240 Speaker 3: Right, how about the It's like it's I think you 147 00:08:17,320 --> 00:08:19,840 Speaker 3: have it pinned on TikTok And it's like the guy 148 00:08:19,960 --> 00:08:24,040 Speaker 3: is like, you know, just in his like late twenties 149 00:08:24,080 --> 00:08:28,160 Speaker 3: and early thirties, and he seems to be really really 150 00:08:28,200 --> 00:08:32,440 Speaker 3: offended by you, but then he's like smiling at you 151 00:08:32,520 --> 00:08:35,480 Speaker 3: and asking questions back. So I'm like, I'm like, is 152 00:08:35,520 --> 00:08:38,679 Speaker 3: he I was like, is he flirting? Oh? 153 00:08:38,800 --> 00:08:41,160 Speaker 2: Is that the guy? That's like, why the would you 154 00:08:41,200 --> 00:08:47,000 Speaker 2: ask me that? That guy? Yeah, he gets very upset. Yeah, 155 00:08:47,080 --> 00:08:47,600 Speaker 2: I don't know. 156 00:08:47,720 --> 00:08:52,320 Speaker 5: Again, like it's it's it was the strangest thing because yeah, 157 00:08:52,320 --> 00:08:54,720 Speaker 5: when I walked up to him, he was totally friendly, 158 00:08:54,960 --> 00:08:57,640 Speaker 5: and then I said that, and it was like I 159 00:08:57,679 --> 00:09:01,640 Speaker 5: could see like a cloud, the storm cloud come over him, 160 00:09:01,720 --> 00:09:05,640 Speaker 5: Like his whole demeanor changed and he was so filled 161 00:09:05,679 --> 00:09:08,840 Speaker 5: with like hatred and rage towards me in that minute, 162 00:09:09,360 --> 00:09:14,720 Speaker 5: like I had really pushed something deep deep within him 163 00:09:14,960 --> 00:09:19,240 Speaker 5: that So it's a little scary sometimes. 164 00:09:19,160 --> 00:09:22,000 Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean definitely, especially like you're in public and 165 00:09:22,000 --> 00:09:24,559 Speaker 3: they're just kind of like getting like all a nerve. 166 00:09:24,640 --> 00:09:27,199 Speaker 1: You're like, it's just a TikTok video. 167 00:09:28,440 --> 00:09:41,840 Speaker 3: You're like you're not trying to like short circuit him. 168 00:09:41,840 --> 00:09:44,800 Speaker 3: What's the biggest takeaway that you've had after speaking to 169 00:09:44,840 --> 00:09:48,280 Speaker 3: so many different men, Is there just like one continuous theme, 170 00:09:49,200 --> 00:09:51,400 Speaker 3: like what is it that they are they're they're saying? 171 00:09:52,600 --> 00:09:56,600 Speaker 3: Because there they are saying something. I heard it many times. 172 00:09:56,720 --> 00:10:01,720 Speaker 3: I'm just wondering what are they angry? Are they just 173 00:10:01,840 --> 00:10:08,040 Speaker 3: mad about being men? Are they lonely? 174 00:10:09,760 --> 00:10:10,200 Speaker 6: Right? 175 00:10:12,400 --> 00:10:14,480 Speaker 2: I think it's all of the above. 176 00:10:14,800 --> 00:10:18,640 Speaker 7: I mean I think, yeah, I don't know where this 177 00:10:18,840 --> 00:10:23,080 Speaker 7: like thing. I do think there's something to do with 178 00:10:23,160 --> 00:10:27,800 Speaker 7: like the manosphere, like these men that have started podcasts 179 00:10:28,160 --> 00:10:31,960 Speaker 7: talking about how they're mad at women for whatever, for 180 00:10:32,000 --> 00:10:34,199 Speaker 7: not wanting to sleep with them, or because I think 181 00:10:34,720 --> 00:10:38,720 Speaker 7: there is, you know, some entitlement that comes with being 182 00:10:38,840 --> 00:10:41,880 Speaker 7: a man and living in a patriarchal society. 183 00:10:42,559 --> 00:10:44,080 Speaker 2: And I think. 184 00:10:46,160 --> 00:10:54,240 Speaker 5: To have their place being questioned is like it's really 185 00:10:54,320 --> 00:10:58,080 Speaker 5: messing with some people that I think thought maybe it 186 00:10:58,120 --> 00:11:01,199 Speaker 5: was going to be easier or that they should just 187 00:11:01,240 --> 00:11:03,679 Speaker 5: like yeah, that that life should be easier and they 188 00:11:03,679 --> 00:11:07,679 Speaker 5: should get things more than they are getting them. 189 00:11:08,840 --> 00:11:12,000 Speaker 2: But I am always like confused when a guy's like 190 00:11:12,080 --> 00:11:14,040 Speaker 2: men don't know their place anymore. I'm like what do 191 00:11:14,120 --> 00:11:14,400 Speaker 2: you mean? 192 00:11:14,559 --> 00:11:18,480 Speaker 5: Just like be like just so y'all, don't I know 193 00:11:18,679 --> 00:11:22,000 Speaker 5: it's so hard, just like do your be cool? 194 00:11:22,640 --> 00:11:23,040 Speaker 1: Just do you? 195 00:11:23,320 --> 00:11:25,400 Speaker 2: Yeah, it's not about being men or women. 196 00:11:25,520 --> 00:11:28,960 Speaker 5: It's just like about living your life, like why is 197 00:11:28,960 --> 00:11:30,240 Speaker 5: there a place in society? 198 00:11:30,280 --> 00:11:32,319 Speaker 2: But basically my whole. 199 00:11:32,160 --> 00:11:34,960 Speaker 5: Point is I think that's kind of like a like 200 00:11:35,000 --> 00:11:38,960 Speaker 5: a manisphere rhetoric is like men being confused by their place. 201 00:11:40,240 --> 00:11:42,800 Speaker 4: It's like, man, do you think too? 202 00:11:42,840 --> 00:11:46,319 Speaker 3: It's because like in the workplace they're now they're being 203 00:11:46,480 --> 00:11:50,040 Speaker 3: challenged with you know, with women and with all these 204 00:11:50,080 --> 00:11:53,800 Speaker 3: different variables. And then now like you're asking this like 205 00:11:54,000 --> 00:11:59,520 Speaker 3: very this question that you know men men recognize themselves 206 00:11:59,600 --> 00:12:02,760 Speaker 3: by the cars they drive, the work that they have, 207 00:12:03,080 --> 00:12:04,320 Speaker 3: what's in their bank account. 208 00:12:04,800 --> 00:12:07,280 Speaker 4: You know, that's how they identify themselves. So do you 209 00:12:07,280 --> 00:12:08,480 Speaker 4: think that like you're just. 210 00:12:08,600 --> 00:12:11,640 Speaker 1: Like who are you? And they're like what? 211 00:12:13,440 --> 00:12:13,640 Speaker 2: Right? 212 00:12:13,920 --> 00:12:14,120 Speaker 1: Right? 213 00:12:14,200 --> 00:12:16,880 Speaker 2: They haven't. I mean a lot of but I don't 214 00:12:16,880 --> 00:12:18,120 Speaker 2: think it's just men. It's people. 215 00:12:18,200 --> 00:12:21,880 Speaker 5: Like a lot of people just aren't terribly introspective. So 216 00:12:21,960 --> 00:12:26,160 Speaker 5: I think it like really throws someone off their game 217 00:12:26,240 --> 00:12:31,400 Speaker 5: when you're like asking this very like open ended, kind 218 00:12:31,440 --> 00:12:36,480 Speaker 5: of abstract question and maybe they're confused, and so that's 219 00:12:36,520 --> 00:12:40,840 Speaker 5: like frustrating. They just go immediately to frustration and rage 220 00:12:40,840 --> 00:12:44,640 Speaker 5: because they don't know how to answer it. But yeah, 221 00:12:44,679 --> 00:12:48,560 Speaker 5: I think men do you know, so many people do 222 00:12:48,640 --> 00:12:51,760 Speaker 5: define themselves sort of by their external world and what 223 00:12:51,800 --> 00:12:54,200 Speaker 5: they have and how much money they have. 224 00:12:54,400 --> 00:13:00,319 Speaker 2: And women, now are you know, we are we. 225 00:13:00,320 --> 00:13:02,360 Speaker 5: Had to work harder to get to where we are 226 00:13:03,200 --> 00:13:06,679 Speaker 5: and we are killing it. So I think that is 227 00:13:06,760 --> 00:13:09,480 Speaker 5: like intimidating for some guys. 228 00:13:10,320 --> 00:13:11,319 Speaker 1: I have a question to you this. 229 00:13:11,840 --> 00:13:17,360 Speaker 3: There's this concept of the male loneliness epidemic. Like I'm like, 230 00:13:17,360 --> 00:13:19,480 Speaker 3: wait a minute, wiremen alone, Like, what do you mean 231 00:13:19,520 --> 00:13:20,040 Speaker 3: they're lonely? 232 00:13:20,240 --> 00:13:24,080 Speaker 1: Go outside? Like you're the you're guy, you know, Like, yeah, 233 00:13:24,160 --> 00:13:25,680 Speaker 1: talk to me about that. What are your thoughts on 234 00:13:25,720 --> 00:13:26,439 Speaker 1: this epidemic. 235 00:13:26,960 --> 00:13:31,320 Speaker 5: I think it's just like I think it's probably real 236 00:13:31,400 --> 00:13:32,120 Speaker 5: among some men. 237 00:13:32,160 --> 00:13:33,000 Speaker 1: I think a lot of men. 238 00:13:32,920 --> 00:13:35,280 Speaker 5: Are lonely because they're just like they grew up just 239 00:13:35,320 --> 00:13:37,320 Speaker 5: playing video games and they don't know how to like 240 00:13:37,400 --> 00:13:40,880 Speaker 5: interact with other people, and they have just like poor 241 00:13:40,960 --> 00:13:45,320 Speaker 5: social skills and they're spending all their time listening to 242 00:13:46,720 --> 00:13:50,560 Speaker 5: you know, andrew utate instead of like going out into 243 00:13:50,600 --> 00:13:55,840 Speaker 5: the world. And meeting people, and yeah, it's it's people 244 00:13:55,920 --> 00:13:58,920 Speaker 5: not learning social skills. But I think people are lonely. 245 00:13:59,000 --> 00:14:04,400 Speaker 5: I mean women are lonely too. Everyone's lonely. We are 246 00:14:04,440 --> 00:14:06,719 Speaker 5: all having to learn how to live in this society 247 00:14:06,760 --> 00:14:09,400 Speaker 5: where we're like more comfortable behind a computer screen. 248 00:14:10,120 --> 00:14:10,400 Speaker 1: I know. 249 00:14:11,240 --> 00:14:14,120 Speaker 3: And I think that's a direct correlation from COVID. We 250 00:14:14,120 --> 00:14:16,400 Speaker 3: were alone, people were on their screens. 251 00:14:16,640 --> 00:14:17,800 Speaker 1: Dating and apps are bigger. 252 00:14:18,080 --> 00:14:20,880 Speaker 4: So this podcast is all about, you know, finding love 253 00:14:21,000 --> 00:14:22,000 Speaker 4: in your chapter two? 254 00:14:22,600 --> 00:14:27,280 Speaker 3: Yeah, do you think and do you think that women 255 00:14:28,280 --> 00:14:30,720 Speaker 3: should be asking men out on a date? 256 00:14:32,200 --> 00:14:32,440 Speaker 1: Yeah? 257 00:14:32,480 --> 00:14:34,960 Speaker 2: I mean, yeah, I think I don't do that. 258 00:14:35,320 --> 00:14:44,200 Speaker 8: Yeah, I mean I am in my forties, so I 259 00:14:44,240 --> 00:14:47,080 Speaker 8: guess this could be considered chapter two. 260 00:14:47,360 --> 00:14:50,760 Speaker 3: And I and well have you wait, have you been 261 00:14:50,760 --> 00:14:51,320 Speaker 3: married before? 262 00:14:51,680 --> 00:14:56,280 Speaker 5: I wasn't married, but you know I did have you know, 263 00:14:57,040 --> 00:14:59,760 Speaker 5: a lot of life changes in my thirties and kind 264 00:14:59,760 --> 00:15:05,520 Speaker 5: of to start over in my forties. And I ran 265 00:15:05,640 --> 00:15:07,480 Speaker 5: up to my current boyfriend. 266 00:15:07,840 --> 00:15:11,840 Speaker 2: But that's because I was doing interviews, So. 267 00:15:11,720 --> 00:15:14,480 Speaker 1: It's really about me. 268 00:15:15,920 --> 00:15:17,160 Speaker 2: Yeah, I was like, why. 269 00:15:16,960 --> 00:15:19,200 Speaker 1: Are you like this? What do you think about wine? 270 00:15:19,800 --> 00:15:20,280 Speaker 4: Do you like it? 271 00:15:20,600 --> 00:15:21,800 Speaker 1: Do you like to have a class of wine with me? 272 00:15:21,880 --> 00:15:23,160 Speaker 1: That would be hilarious if. 273 00:15:23,000 --> 00:15:28,360 Speaker 2: You know your video. I wasn't hitting on him. 274 00:15:29,680 --> 00:15:31,880 Speaker 1: He just ran up to him and were like, you're hot. 275 00:15:32,120 --> 00:15:36,760 Speaker 5: But it really works. I do think so few women 276 00:15:36,960 --> 00:15:40,360 Speaker 5: approach men that. Now that I have like a job 277 00:15:40,480 --> 00:15:43,440 Speaker 5: where I approach men for a living, they love it. 278 00:15:43,760 --> 00:15:47,240 Speaker 5: Men love being approached by a woman. I think so 279 00:15:47,360 --> 00:15:53,880 Speaker 5: many men are so afraid even like you know, interesting, cool, successful, 280 00:15:54,040 --> 00:15:58,040 Speaker 5: powerful men, it's really intimidating for them to like go 281 00:15:58,240 --> 00:16:01,320 Speaker 5: up to a woman and talk to her. So women, 282 00:16:01,680 --> 00:16:03,960 Speaker 5: if you want to go up to men, you. 283 00:16:04,000 --> 00:16:05,680 Speaker 1: Can like they'll like it. 284 00:16:05,880 --> 00:16:09,400 Speaker 2: No man is going to be like, What's I. 285 00:16:09,400 --> 00:16:12,760 Speaker 3: Going to change the dynamic of the hunt, because like 286 00:16:12,960 --> 00:16:15,600 Speaker 3: so many men talk to like, you know, when I 287 00:16:15,640 --> 00:16:17,640 Speaker 3: talked to me, I mean, I'm just say on this podcast, 288 00:16:17,680 --> 00:16:20,280 Speaker 3: and I talked to men a lot about dating as well, 289 00:16:21,640 --> 00:16:24,080 Speaker 3: and on my new show, we're talking a lot about 290 00:16:24,080 --> 00:16:25,080 Speaker 3: my dating journey. 291 00:16:25,640 --> 00:16:28,560 Speaker 1: And I was in Palm Beach and it was absolutely hideous. 292 00:16:29,560 --> 00:16:33,760 Speaker 3: These men are like, hello, be nice, be nice to 293 00:16:33,840 --> 00:16:37,680 Speaker 3: me number one. Yeah, nice, Just be kind, Just be nice, 294 00:16:38,080 --> 00:16:42,320 Speaker 3: Just be kind like this, questions, ask questions, Ask me 295 00:16:42,360 --> 00:16:45,840 Speaker 3: how my day is, do you know? Just be kind, 296 00:16:45,880 --> 00:16:48,000 Speaker 3: Just be nice, and I just I'm just like, really, 297 00:16:48,520 --> 00:16:49,800 Speaker 3: I just would never ask. 298 00:16:49,880 --> 00:16:51,360 Speaker 1: I mean, there were guys and I was like, oh god, 299 00:16:51,640 --> 00:16:52,160 Speaker 1: is kind of cute. 300 00:16:52,160 --> 00:16:54,720 Speaker 4: And I'm like, no, no, no, no, I'm not asked. 301 00:16:54,760 --> 00:16:55,160 Speaker 1: Came out. 302 00:16:56,160 --> 00:17:01,400 Speaker 5: Yeah, somebody just came on my show and she was 303 00:17:01,440 --> 00:17:06,119 Speaker 5: saying that you should just like give a man like 304 00:17:06,280 --> 00:17:10,160 Speaker 5: a look and that's how men should know that it's 305 00:17:10,200 --> 00:17:11,399 Speaker 5: okay to come to you. 306 00:17:11,760 --> 00:17:13,760 Speaker 1: And I like, so like, let's just a look. 307 00:17:13,840 --> 00:17:17,720 Speaker 3: Ready, like's a world play, It's okay, what's what's your look? 308 00:17:18,240 --> 00:17:22,400 Speaker 2: I looks like this, Okay. 309 00:17:22,119 --> 00:17:23,360 Speaker 1: Ready for mine? Yeah? 310 00:17:23,480 --> 00:17:23,720 Speaker 6: Mine? 311 00:17:23,920 --> 00:17:28,160 Speaker 2: Like yeah, that's good. 312 00:17:29,119 --> 00:17:30,280 Speaker 1: They always say touch your hair. 313 00:17:30,280 --> 00:17:32,360 Speaker 3: If people are like your hair, I'm like, yes, I'm 314 00:17:32,359 --> 00:17:33,280 Speaker 3: trying to trash men. 315 00:17:33,840 --> 00:17:36,320 Speaker 2: You gotta like, yeah, like touch your mouth. 316 00:17:37,960 --> 00:17:41,280 Speaker 5: And you just well you can be like yeah, then 317 00:17:41,320 --> 00:17:43,080 Speaker 5: you start laughing, you giggle. 318 00:17:43,680 --> 00:17:45,520 Speaker 1: Exactly, winking exactly, and then. 319 00:17:45,440 --> 00:17:47,439 Speaker 2: The men know that it's okay to talk to you. 320 00:17:47,560 --> 00:17:50,640 Speaker 2: But if you don't do that, So let's just. 321 00:17:50,720 --> 00:17:52,439 Speaker 3: Let's just run through those because this is this is 322 00:17:52,440 --> 00:17:54,879 Speaker 3: an audio podcast, and just tell me like, okay, so 323 00:17:55,040 --> 00:17:57,480 Speaker 3: winking is good, touching your hair is good? 324 00:17:57,600 --> 00:17:58,240 Speaker 1: What are yeah? 325 00:17:58,880 --> 00:18:01,280 Speaker 5: So I kind of like, you know, you put your 326 00:18:01,440 --> 00:18:03,600 Speaker 5: put your head down and you kind of like look 327 00:18:03,680 --> 00:18:04,840 Speaker 5: up and you smile. 328 00:18:05,040 --> 00:18:09,000 Speaker 2: You got a smile. People need to smile more, man, 329 00:18:09,080 --> 00:18:10,359 Speaker 2: really a smile more. 330 00:18:10,440 --> 00:18:14,520 Speaker 4: But smiling smiling is really really good. 331 00:18:14,600 --> 00:18:16,840 Speaker 3: Okay, let's talk about red flags because I think the 332 00:18:16,880 --> 00:18:18,879 Speaker 3: people think when they think of red flags, they think 333 00:18:18,920 --> 00:18:19,800 Speaker 3: of them as pink. 334 00:18:20,560 --> 00:18:25,400 Speaker 1: They're not pink, they're red. Red is red. Red is red? 335 00:18:25,880 --> 00:18:26,879 Speaker 2: Yeah, red as red. 336 00:18:26,960 --> 00:18:28,760 Speaker 5: But why would you even want to mess with a 337 00:18:28,800 --> 00:18:34,639 Speaker 5: pink flag? Like, no flags, No flags are good unless 338 00:18:34,640 --> 00:18:35,080 Speaker 5: it's green. 339 00:18:36,480 --> 00:18:38,520 Speaker 1: I know, I'm like, what are they? 340 00:18:38,680 --> 00:18:38,760 Speaker 3: Like? 341 00:18:39,080 --> 00:18:40,479 Speaker 4: So what are some of the red flags that you've 342 00:18:40,520 --> 00:18:41,080 Speaker 4: come across? 343 00:18:41,480 --> 00:18:42,320 Speaker 2: Okay, so. 344 00:18:43,720 --> 00:18:49,920 Speaker 5: Lying he was obvious, but you know so many people 345 00:18:49,960 --> 00:18:52,199 Speaker 5: are like, oh I caught him in this little lie, Like, 346 00:18:52,600 --> 00:18:54,399 Speaker 5: well then what else is he lying about? 347 00:18:54,960 --> 00:18:59,720 Speaker 2: Right? Lying is not good, even like lying about age 348 00:18:59,760 --> 00:19:02,399 Speaker 2: I think is really weird. 349 00:19:02,480 --> 00:19:05,840 Speaker 5: Like I had a guy that I met on on 350 00:19:06,160 --> 00:19:08,480 Speaker 5: Hinge a long time a while ago, a couple of 351 00:19:08,560 --> 00:19:13,320 Speaker 5: years back, like lied about his age and then I 352 00:19:13,480 --> 00:19:17,080 Speaker 5: like found out he was older, and he was like, well, 353 00:19:18,359 --> 00:19:19,880 Speaker 5: he got defensive and he got. 354 00:19:19,680 --> 00:19:22,080 Speaker 2: Mad at me when I called him out. Yeah, someone 355 00:19:22,160 --> 00:19:22,879 Speaker 2: getting mad at you? 356 00:19:23,000 --> 00:19:28,119 Speaker 5: Someone getting defensive defensive a red flag if anyone's like defensive. 357 00:19:27,600 --> 00:19:48,040 Speaker 6: About anything, and I agree, I agree, Like nom. 358 00:19:41,800 --> 00:19:43,919 Speaker 4: So what are like the positive things like that? 359 00:19:44,000 --> 00:19:47,199 Speaker 3: You'll be like, oh, he's saying that he's kind, And 360 00:19:47,240 --> 00:19:49,600 Speaker 3: then you're like, why is he saying that he's kind of? Like, 361 00:19:49,640 --> 00:19:52,240 Speaker 3: give me some of the things that you've you've you've 362 00:19:52,280 --> 00:19:58,280 Speaker 3: seen that like a petty positive but actually, and by 363 00:19:58,320 --> 00:19:59,639 Speaker 3: the way, after this, I would have write down a 364 00:19:59,640 --> 00:20:00,000 Speaker 3: whole list. 365 00:20:00,480 --> 00:20:07,440 Speaker 2: Okay, I think if a guy says he's kind, that's weird. 366 00:20:07,840 --> 00:20:11,800 Speaker 2: Why does he need to say it? Or like my dad, 367 00:20:11,920 --> 00:20:12,400 Speaker 2: I think he. 368 00:20:12,320 --> 00:20:14,360 Speaker 5: Gave me some advice when I was a little girl, 369 00:20:14,400 --> 00:20:17,239 Speaker 5: and he said, never trust anyone who says trust me. 370 00:20:17,960 --> 00:20:20,960 Speaker 2: And I'm like, you know, that's really true. 371 00:20:21,040 --> 00:20:24,239 Speaker 5: Like if someone, especially if someone says that unprompted, you're like, 372 00:20:25,040 --> 00:20:26,520 Speaker 5: why why are you saying that? 373 00:20:26,560 --> 00:20:27,919 Speaker 1: Why are you asking me to trust you? 374 00:20:28,000 --> 00:20:31,200 Speaker 5: Have you done anything when people try to tell you, oh, 375 00:20:31,240 --> 00:20:33,639 Speaker 5: I'm this kind of person or I do this or 376 00:20:33,680 --> 00:20:35,040 Speaker 5: I'm like this, like. 377 00:20:35,920 --> 00:20:38,960 Speaker 2: No, no, no, just me just show me, like be it. 378 00:20:40,080 --> 00:20:44,119 Speaker 3: I love that and consistently be it, consistently be it 379 00:20:44,200 --> 00:20:46,760 Speaker 3: not just like oh I was nice once. No, no, no, 380 00:20:46,840 --> 00:20:49,320 Speaker 3: it's it's it's an all the time kind of thing. 381 00:20:49,720 --> 00:20:53,440 Speaker 2: Yeah. Consistency is so crucial. 382 00:20:54,320 --> 00:20:54,520 Speaker 7: Yeah. 383 00:20:54,560 --> 00:20:58,000 Speaker 5: If somebody like is a certain way and then they 384 00:20:58,080 --> 00:21:00,840 Speaker 5: just like you see, like a glib or something like 385 00:21:01,080 --> 00:21:04,800 Speaker 5: very opposite of what of what they're portraying themselves as 386 00:21:05,800 --> 00:21:08,719 Speaker 5: run because they're just trying to hide something. 387 00:21:09,520 --> 00:21:11,480 Speaker 1: Yeah. Yeah, I love that. 388 00:21:13,000 --> 00:21:17,560 Speaker 3: I'm going to add cheating because cheaters are. 389 00:21:17,359 --> 00:21:17,960 Speaker 1: Going to cheat. 390 00:21:19,080 --> 00:21:21,679 Speaker 3: If they cheated once or if they have cheated in 391 00:21:21,720 --> 00:21:24,960 Speaker 3: the past, they're going to cheat again. I mean even 392 00:21:25,000 --> 00:21:28,280 Speaker 3: if they say they don't, they they will do things 393 00:21:28,320 --> 00:21:33,080 Speaker 3: that they do not feel as qualifying actual cheating, like 394 00:21:33,200 --> 00:21:37,920 Speaker 3: emotional relationships. You know, emotional relationships are not physical, YadA, YadA, YadA. 395 00:21:38,000 --> 00:21:39,600 Speaker 1: But cheating is hard. 396 00:21:39,400 --> 00:21:45,440 Speaker 2: Now yeah, hard now hard? No, Yeah, Or somebody being like. 397 00:21:47,119 --> 00:21:50,480 Speaker 5: Being like cheap with you, like like anyone any guy 398 00:21:50,480 --> 00:21:54,680 Speaker 5: who's like split the check like just no sorry. 399 00:21:54,480 --> 00:21:58,160 Speaker 3: Or like oh my god, like literally when Palm Beach, 400 00:21:58,200 --> 00:22:00,159 Speaker 3: I was but I went on a date with this 401 00:22:00,240 --> 00:22:04,000 Speaker 3: guy and I said, you know, I was like, oh, 402 00:22:04,040 --> 00:22:06,640 Speaker 3: you know, you know, you know, can you blow can 403 00:22:06,640 --> 00:22:08,200 Speaker 3: you pay? I do have my hair blown out because 404 00:22:08,200 --> 00:22:11,560 Speaker 3: it's Florida because event and he was like, oh, so 405 00:22:12,040 --> 00:22:13,680 Speaker 3: now you want me to pay for You're going to 406 00:22:13,760 --> 00:22:14,840 Speaker 3: pay for my shave. 407 00:22:15,640 --> 00:22:18,399 Speaker 1: I'm like, what, I'm going to an event for you? 408 00:22:18,480 --> 00:22:22,720 Speaker 1: He goes, I paid for your ticket. I'm like, ho, there, Nelly. 409 00:22:23,560 --> 00:22:25,879 Speaker 3: Now you're asking me to pay for a ticket to 410 00:22:25,920 --> 00:22:27,560 Speaker 3: an event that I did not want to go to 411 00:22:27,800 --> 00:22:29,320 Speaker 3: and zero interested going to? 412 00:22:30,720 --> 00:22:33,720 Speaker 1: Like no, thank you? Yeah, no, awful. I don't like 413 00:22:33,760 --> 00:22:35,960 Speaker 1: cheap because I'm not cheap and I do not like cheap. 414 00:22:36,040 --> 00:22:37,520 Speaker 2: Yeah, cheap is so on a track. 415 00:22:37,520 --> 00:22:39,800 Speaker 4: I would never split. I would never split a bill 416 00:22:40,440 --> 00:22:42,199 Speaker 4: for no. 417 00:22:42,200 --> 00:22:44,440 Speaker 5: No, I'll just I'll just pay for it and then 418 00:22:44,440 --> 00:22:45,720 Speaker 5: we'll just never hang out again. 419 00:22:46,280 --> 00:22:49,560 Speaker 3: Exactly, yeah, exactly totally. 420 00:22:50,320 --> 00:22:52,080 Speaker 1: Do men do good men exist? 421 00:22:52,440 --> 00:22:52,680 Speaker 3: Yeah? 422 00:22:52,840 --> 00:22:55,639 Speaker 2: Yeah they do. There I'm going to have to I'm 423 00:22:55,680 --> 00:22:59,320 Speaker 2: going to do like a features reel of like the. 424 00:22:59,320 --> 00:23:04,280 Speaker 3: Good man I've met streets here, Kelly, here's some good men. 425 00:23:04,400 --> 00:23:04,840 Speaker 2: They do? 426 00:23:05,080 --> 00:23:08,960 Speaker 5: The good men exist? You know, I you know, my 427 00:23:09,040 --> 00:23:11,800 Speaker 5: boyfriend is amazing. He's a good man. I was a 428 00:23:11,800 --> 00:23:15,960 Speaker 5: little skeptical about like somebody like really like ticking all 429 00:23:16,000 --> 00:23:17,320 Speaker 5: my boxes. 430 00:23:16,840 --> 00:23:17,600 Speaker 1: But he does. 431 00:23:17,920 --> 00:23:20,840 Speaker 2: So now I'm like love is real, y'all. 432 00:23:21,440 --> 00:23:22,760 Speaker 1: Okay, So where is this? 433 00:23:22,800 --> 00:23:25,640 Speaker 3: Where where do these good men hang out because I 434 00:23:25,680 --> 00:23:26,760 Speaker 3: need the GPS. 435 00:23:26,800 --> 00:23:30,679 Speaker 4: Like yesterday, I'm I'm going to be stalking them like 436 00:23:30,680 --> 00:23:31,720 Speaker 4: a spider monkey. 437 00:23:31,880 --> 00:23:34,520 Speaker 2: I interview like a spider monkey. 438 00:23:35,040 --> 00:23:39,840 Speaker 5: I interviewed pro skiers and they were all really nice. 439 00:23:41,840 --> 00:23:45,440 Speaker 5: I was like, why are all of these boys so amazing? 440 00:23:45,560 --> 00:23:52,679 Speaker 5: And yeah, the Olympian athletes are really sweet. Go for 441 00:23:52,720 --> 00:23:56,520 Speaker 5: the Olympians, Girls for the Olympians. 442 00:23:57,600 --> 00:23:58,919 Speaker 1: You guys have to wait for. 443 00:23:58,840 --> 00:24:04,280 Speaker 5: You, but not like not like athletes, like not ones 444 00:24:04,320 --> 00:24:08,360 Speaker 5: with egos. Right, I feel like maybe guys that are 445 00:24:08,400 --> 00:24:14,800 Speaker 5: like doing like really dangerous things like athletically have less egos. 446 00:24:14,960 --> 00:24:18,920 Speaker 2: I don't know. I don't know if there's one decispect 447 00:24:19,040 --> 00:24:22,240 Speaker 2: of men. Yeah, just like guys with egos are not good. 448 00:24:22,800 --> 00:24:26,639 Speaker 3: Holla, you are so funny. I have a couple of 449 00:24:26,720 --> 00:24:29,520 Speaker 3: more things to ask you on I do part two. 450 00:24:29,840 --> 00:24:30,560 Speaker 1: We'll be right back