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Speaker 1: You're real talk on vacation. Kadeen is a completely different person.

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Speaker 2: That's the fact, Baby Cybar like your shades those a

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Speaker 2: fancy for you.

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Speaker 3: I love that. For me, travel is my love language,

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Speaker 3: but traveling with you is top tier.

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Speaker 4: I'm gonna tell y'all why dead ass.

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Speaker 2: Hey, I'm Kadeen and I'm Devout and we're the Ellis's.

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Speaker 4: You may know us from posting funny videos with our.

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Speaker 3: Boys and reading each other publicly as a form of therapy.

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Speaker 4: Wait, I make you need therapy most days. Wow.

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Speaker 3: Oh, and one more important thing to mention, we're married.

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Speaker 4: Yes, sir, we are.

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Speaker 1: We created this podcast to open dialogue about some of

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Speaker 1: li's most taboo topics.

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Speaker 3: Things most folks don't want to talk about.

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Speaker 1: Through the lens of a millennial married couple. Dead ass

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Speaker 1: is a term that we say every day. So when

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Speaker 1: we say dead ass, we're actually saying facts one hundred

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Speaker 1: the truth, the whole truth.

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Speaker 4: And nothing but the truth. Were about to take philos

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Speaker 4: off to our whole new level.

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Speaker 3: Dead ass starts right now.

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Speaker 1: I'm gonna tell you guys a quick story about the

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Speaker 1: last vacation we just went on.

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Speaker 4: Went on a little.

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Speaker 1: I don't know, if you call it a yacht cruise

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Speaker 1: or we went yachting off the French Riviera with some friends.

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Speaker 3: You can address me as YadA Yana from now on.

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Speaker 4: Big YACHDI, big YACHTI, big YACHTI about that yacht.

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Speaker 3: Life, Yeah, it's great.

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Speaker 4: We went to a bunch of different places.

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Speaker 1: We'll get into that, but my favorite place that we

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Speaker 1: went to was Kopery.

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Speaker 4: And you gotta say it like that.

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Speaker 3: You can't be like a pri.

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Speaker 4: No, let's say Copley.

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Speaker 1: And the reason why is because it's a small little

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Speaker 1: island right off the coast of Italy.

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Speaker 4: And when we stepped out of.

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Speaker 1: We went to like a little little bar. It wasn't

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Speaker 1: a bar, it was a band playing. It was very

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Speaker 1: it was very island. It reminded me of the islands.

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Speaker 1: We go to Caribbean islands all the time. It was

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Speaker 1: it was very island dish.

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Speaker 2: We had. It had like the local ish, very at

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Speaker 2: home vibe.

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Speaker 1: Right then, and they had a local band. Local band

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Speaker 1: was playing. Everybody was singing and dancing and having a

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Speaker 1: good time. But as we walked down and we were

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Speaker 1: walking back to the taxis to get back to the yacht,

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Speaker 1: we just saw couples everywhere. There were couples just lean

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Speaker 1: up against statues making out. There was couples holding hiss

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Speaker 1: They were couple literally couples skipping down the streets of company,

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Speaker 1: and the moon was huge. It was quiet, but there

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Speaker 1: was a light rumble of people just in love.

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Speaker 3: There was a nice breeze. It was just like a

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Speaker 3: really perfect night.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, it was.

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Speaker 1: It was a great night to just look at the

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Speaker 1: person you love and just feel like nobody else existed. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: and we haven't had a moment like that in a

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Speaker 1: long time.

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Speaker 3: In a very long time.

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Speaker 2: It was giving get me back to the boat so

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Speaker 2: we can rock the boat, work the Meddle eight. It

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Speaker 2: wasn't even karaoke time yet.

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Speaker 5: When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza that.

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Speaker 3: I love that.

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Speaker 4: What's the second version begin?

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Speaker 5: When the moon hits your rye like a big pizza.

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Speaker 5: Supply that's some more.

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Speaker 2: I'm so conflicted because for those of you who are

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Speaker 2: not watching right now, your outfit is definitely not giving

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Speaker 2: Italy vibes, just giving more of like Kingston, Jamaica tree

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Speaker 2: very time trying to.

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Speaker 4: My two thousands babies.

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Speaker 2: I know what that is, absolutely Loly is giving very

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Speaker 2: much shower ranks and the whole crew.

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Speaker 4: Yes, it's all right.

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Speaker 2: I'll take both, mister, love of that. Oh my god,

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Speaker 2: so many people, those my PEOPLESO. I grew up on

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Speaker 2: all that, So trust me, I give it. But let's

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Speaker 2: go pay some bills because if we don't, I can't

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Speaker 2: go on any more trips, and I'm gonna be a

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Speaker 2: very very sad girl. Let's do that, and we're gonna

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Speaker 2: come back and we're gonna talk more about vacations and

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Speaker 2: why they're so so necessary for us.

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Speaker 4: All right.

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Speaker 1: So now we're back and we're going to move into

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Speaker 1: the topic of the show, which is the reason for vacations.

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Speaker 4: All right, So let's check this out.

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Speaker 1: You know, I know you typically do these stats and

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Speaker 1: matter of fact, you go ahead and do the stats

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Speaker 1: of facts that put together.

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Speaker 2: So pretty much we found some style Tripple found some

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Speaker 2: stats about traveling together couples. What that looks like according

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Speaker 2: to the US Travel Association eight and ten. So that's

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Speaker 2: about seventy nine percent of couples believe that traveling together

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Speaker 2: has a positive impact on their relationship. Travel together inspires romance.

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Speaker 2: According to seventy two percent among couples that travel together.

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Speaker 2: About sixty eight percent say that leisure travel is a

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Speaker 2: necessary component of maintaining a healthy relationship. I concur one

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Speaker 2: hundred percent more than seven to ten couples who travel together,

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Speaker 2: seventy one percent say talking and reconnecting is an important

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Speaker 2: reason to spend time alone together while on vacation, and

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Speaker 2: couples who travel together report that they are more likely

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Speaker 2: to communicate well with their partners than those who do

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Speaker 2: not travel together.

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Speaker 3: See if you don't, you're doing yourself a deservice, y'all right?

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Speaker 2: And couples who travel together are less likely to say

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Speaker 2: they wish their partner would do a better job sharing

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Speaker 2: his or her feelings.

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Speaker 3: So would just look at that.

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Speaker 2: Let's discuss the This is what I This is the

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Speaker 2: kind of stuff that I google before.

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Speaker 3: I'm like, babies, you can't google none.

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Speaker 4: That's what you're trying to take credit for. Trouble. She's

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Speaker 4: trying to take credit for all the work you put in.

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Speaker 3: I don't want to say I didn't say I google this.

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Speaker 2: I'm just saying, whenever I do think about man, I

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Speaker 2: really could use a vacation with devll.

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Speaker 3: Let me see how the facts is.

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Speaker 4: That's you're looking it's.

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Speaker 1: You be on TikTok, look at looking at top ten

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Speaker 1: places to go, see where you get tand that's what

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Speaker 1: that's what you.

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Speaker 2: I do reference my saved, my saved reels and posts

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Speaker 2: and stuff, so I can reference those hot spots me.

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Speaker 1: On the other hand, I look at expenses, clearly expensive,

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Speaker 1: but I also look at places where well, of course

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Speaker 1: we also look at places for shopping, because you have

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Speaker 1: to shop when you go.

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Speaker 4: I don't have to.

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Speaker 3: It depends on where it is. I don't have to.

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Speaker 4: Okay, okay, okay, that's fair, right, No, that's fair. But

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Speaker 4: I also look at like food, Oh that's huge.

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Speaker 1: I want to be able to do something good, but

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Speaker 1: I also want to eat at places that are known

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Speaker 1: for having good food. You know, Italy known for having

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Speaker 1: great food. The French food is known for being great.

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Speaker 4: If you had to choose between Italian food or French.

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Speaker 3: Food, hands down, Italian food.

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Speaker 4: To agree food, which is crazy.

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Speaker 2: I feel like all of these like new found allergies

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Speaker 2: of mine.

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Speaker 3: I can go to Italy and be like fuck it.

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Speaker 2: I probably won't be allergic because the food is so

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Speaker 2: fresh and so pure out there that it's given.

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Speaker 3: We need to move to Italy at least.

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Speaker 4: I don't know.

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Speaker 1: I think Italian beef pause is the same as American

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Speaker 1: beef beefing good for your blood apparently.

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Speaker 4: So to take the wind out of my cell, I'm

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Speaker 4: just saying, like.

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Speaker 2: I can more. I'm now I'm abandoned banana boat. You

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Speaker 2: can be catamaran.

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Speaker 4: No, you just got to eat crustaceans.

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Speaker 3: But we definitely had that in Italy, for sure.

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Speaker 4: It was great.

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Speaker 2: Seafood is fresh. You figure you're literally right by the water,

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Speaker 2: so everything coming in. Like some days we went to

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Speaker 2: restaurants and they were pretty much like, here's what's fresh.

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Speaker 2: It's not like, oh, here's the menu. Yeah, of course

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Speaker 2: they have the menu, but it's like, what was the

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Speaker 2: fresh catch that they just brought in from the short

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Speaker 2: It was good.

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Speaker 4: But no.

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Speaker 1: But seriously, I enjoy the most on vacation the time

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Speaker 1: we spend we sit down to actually get a chance

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Speaker 1: to talk, because Kadeen and I will be in this

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Speaker 1: house every single day and we'll not see each other

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Speaker 1: till twelve midnight, right unless we get some dedicated time

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Speaker 1: to work out together. It's Kadeen wakes up, she gets

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Speaker 1: the kids ready for school. I take the kids to school.

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Speaker 1: When we come back, Kadeen got amash to run or

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Speaker 1: I got erro shran. Before we know what, the kids

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Speaker 1: got to get picked up, Jackson got practiced, this one

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Speaker 1: got to go to this event. And then they come

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Speaker 1: back home after practice. Practice gets done at eight thirty

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Speaker 1: sometimes nine o'clock. We come back home, Kadeen is putting

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Speaker 1: the little ones to bed. Then she's getting Jackson's dinner ready.

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Speaker 1: I'm helping them with his contacts. Me and jack spend

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Speaker 1: some time together. We put them to bed at ten thirty.

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Speaker 1: Then if we didn't get our workout in, you and

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Speaker 1: not going to gym, we get our workout in and

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Speaker 1: before we know what, it's twelve o'clock.

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Speaker 2: It's midnight, just in time to do it all over again. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: and we are literally, as we said, ship's passing for

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Speaker 2: real in the house together and we don't even realize

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Speaker 2: that the talking that we do, because at one point

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Speaker 2: de Val and I we would get into it because

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Speaker 2: he'd be like, bro, like you haven't you barely like

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Speaker 2: gave me a kiss.

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Speaker 3: In like a couple of days, Like.

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Speaker 4: Are you won't even kiss me?

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Speaker 2: And he's just like I'd be like, no, I feel

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Speaker 2: like every minute you're like I see you, like you

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Speaker 2: be here, but we're not.

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Speaker 3: We're not connected, right, like actually.

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Speaker 2: Connecting with someone, being affectionate, having conversation uninterrupted, Like those

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Speaker 2: are things that I was taking for granted because I'm like, oh,

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Speaker 2: Davalla's here.

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Speaker 1: And those are things I need, yeah, for sure, like

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Speaker 1: this and this is this is part of like a

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Speaker 1: new form of masculinity where when you will you were

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Speaker 1: brought up as a man to feel like, don't say

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Speaker 1: that you need your your woman.

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Speaker 4: You know what I'm saying. Just be why I didn't

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Speaker 4: deal with it.

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Speaker 1: Nah, bro yep, Nah, I'm man enough to say I

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Speaker 1: need my wife's attention at some point, like I need

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Speaker 1: a hug, I need some kisses, I need to squeeze

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Speaker 1: some booty, and I need to talk about what our

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Speaker 1: future is. And when I mean the future, I'm not

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Speaker 1: talking about a five year plan all the time. It's like, yo,

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Speaker 1: what is our plan for this weekend? Like what is

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Speaker 1: our plan for tomorrow? So that we can get on

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Speaker 1: the same page. Because when I don't feel like we're

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Speaker 1: vibing on the same page or not even in the

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Speaker 1: same book.

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Speaker 4: I'm not in a good place. Definitely. You know, I'm

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Speaker 4: not in a good place, and I'm honest with that.

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Speaker 4: I need that.

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Speaker 3: No, I love that you're honest with it.

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Speaker 2: And I think that these stats are very spot on

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Speaker 2: because the positive things that they say come out of

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Speaker 2: spending time via a vacation, and a vacation sometimes is

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Speaker 2: not feasible for all people, right, so financially may not

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Speaker 2: be feasible. You may not have the time to take

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Speaker 2: from work, for example, to do something extended, to go abroad.

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Speaker 2: Believe it or not, some people, especially as black people,

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Speaker 2: don't even have a passport, you know, so vacation can

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Speaker 2: look like so many different things to people. We did

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Speaker 2: a really nice week out in Italy, but sometimes it

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Speaker 2: requires that. I see de Val is kind of losing steam.

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Speaker 2: I feel like we need to reconnect or disconnect from

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Speaker 2: the world to reconnect, and I'll be quick to book

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Speaker 2: a staycation and he'll laugh at me because he was like,

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Speaker 2: we have this big house, and you know, we can

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Speaker 2: take some time at night just to like as a win, like,

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Speaker 2: when are we actually going to take time.

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Speaker 3: I'm going to book a.

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Speaker 2: Hotel in the city and we're gonna go for dinner

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Speaker 2: and we're going to stay a weekend and make it

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Speaker 2: a staycation, because it's sometimes impossible, even though the intentions

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Speaker 2: are good, it's sometimes impossible to say that we are

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Speaker 2: able to get the time that we need and deserve

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Speaker 2: from each other being at home, because it's always going

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Speaker 2: to be a distraction. So sometimes that vacation or that

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Speaker 2: vacation might look like a staycation and it could be

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Speaker 2: something as simple as an overnight or two.

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Speaker 1: Now, I feel like when you take the vacations as

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Speaker 1: well is important. It's not just about taking a vacation,

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Speaker 1: it's when right. We learned this summer that everything we

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Speaker 1: did on our vacation that we thought was going to

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Speaker 1: recharge us for the family vacations just just went away

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Speaker 1: as soon as we dove right into family vacation and

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Speaker 1: an extended family vacation. One thing we have learned is

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Speaker 1: that we should close out our summer with a vacation,

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Speaker 1: or do a vacation at the top of the summer,

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Speaker 1: and then to do a vacation at the back end

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Speaker 1: of the summer once the kids are all settled. Sure,

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Speaker 1: because those family vacations have nothing to do with us.

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Speaker 1: And we took moments at the end of the night,

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Speaker 1: and I tell you, moments thirty minutes were the only

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Speaker 1: moments we got when we went downstairs, had a couple drinks,

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Speaker 1: put the phones down.

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Speaker 4: There was no TV.

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Speaker 1: Matter of fact, on vacation for those two and a

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Speaker 1: half weeks, we didn't watch We didn't watch television at all. No,

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Speaker 1: we were too busy running after the kids and at

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Speaker 1: night it was a time to unwind.

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Speaker 4: But those were the best moments for me.

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Speaker 1: Right, you put your phone down, Right, you look into

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Speaker 1: your partner's eyes, you talk about the future. For Kadeen

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Speaker 1: and I, having a plan has always been what's brought

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Speaker 1: us together.

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Speaker 3: Yah.

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Speaker 4: Right. I think we talked about this in another.

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Speaker 1: Podcast that the first five years of our marriage was

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Speaker 1: very difficult because it was stressful. What I didn't realize

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Speaker 1: was the first five years of our marriage we didn't

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Speaker 1: go on vacations because we was in money saving mode.

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Speaker 3: We're in super money saving mode.

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Speaker 1: The only staycation we went on was year one of

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Speaker 1: our anniversary.

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Speaker 4: We went to the Conrad. That's the only.

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Speaker 1: Staycation we had in the first five years, Which makes

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Speaker 1: sense why we were so like rattled and on edg

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Speaker 1: so true.

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Speaker 2: It makes so much sense because you know, if you're

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Speaker 2: not like to travel together, then chances are you're going

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Speaker 2: to have a difficult time sharing feelings or you're not

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Speaker 2: going to have time to maintain a healthy relationship. So

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Speaker 2: that's actually a prime example of how that affected us.

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Speaker 1: But the only thing that kind of kept us going

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Speaker 1: was that we had a plan, and we had a

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Speaker 1: common interest. We had Jackson, and we had both made

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Speaker 1: a decision and we were like, listen, we don't like

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Speaker 1: each other right now, but I love Jackson so much

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Speaker 1: and I love you so much, and I'm not leaving.

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Speaker 4: And you were like, yeah, I love jack so much

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Speaker 4: and I love you. I'm not lying.

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Speaker 3: I think that was the only common thing.

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Speaker 4: That the only common thing at that time.

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Speaker 1: We were twenty seven years old trying to figure out

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Speaker 1: what this marriage thing was, and we was both like, well,

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Speaker 1: I'm not leaving, and I was like, well, I love

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Speaker 1: you so much, I'm not going to ask you to leave.

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Speaker 4: And we figured it out.

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Speaker 1: But it was in the moments where we sat down

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Speaker 1: and was still and didn't let the world get involved

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Speaker 1: everything else, and we could look at each other and say,

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Speaker 1: this is the person I fell in love with kind

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Speaker 1: of brought us back and to be honest, if you

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Speaker 1: don't have vacations throughout the year. Because Kadein and I

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Speaker 1: have talked about this, We said every quarter we were

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Speaker 1: going to go somewhere. That's that was the plan.

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Speaker 3: That was the plan.

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Speaker 1: And when work started to pick up and TV started

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Speaker 1: to pick up, and then we have more kids, that

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Speaker 1: every quarter turned into every year, right, you know, And.

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Speaker 2: Sometimes we wouldn't even be able to make it for

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Speaker 2: our anniversary because our uri for the past couple of

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Speaker 2: years we were at essence Fest. You know. Essence Fest

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Speaker 2: is always that first weekend in July, and to me,

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Speaker 2: I'm always like, well, it's irresponsible to leave behind a

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Speaker 2: potential opportunity to make money for our family to just

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Speaker 2: go on vacation, you know. And then after essence Fest,

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Speaker 2: we'd just be so tired that we're like, damn, we've

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Speaker 2: been away from the kids for five days. Is it

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Speaker 2: now selfish of us to then now extend that and

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Speaker 2: go away for a week together from essence Fest. And

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Speaker 2: then we'd fall into that guilty parent mode of saying,

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Speaker 2: you know what, will be all right, We'll just wait

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Speaker 2: until and then whenever the next you know, milestone moment

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Speaker 2: was and then there was always something else that popped up.

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Speaker 2: So we started to or at least I started to

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Speaker 2: make sure that we prioritized the time together and the

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Speaker 2: time away. And Devalo said to me point blank on

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Speaker 2: our last family trip that he just wanted to see

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Speaker 2: me do things that were deliberate for him, and that

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Speaker 2: was almost like it pretty much was an argument that

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Speaker 2: evolved into just a conversation about just doing things deliberate

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Speaker 2: for him, and I told him that moving forward, I'm

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Speaker 2: no longer going to sacrifice that because you know, it's

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Speaker 2: easy to plan a trip knowing, okay, these are the

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Speaker 2: things that I like and want to do and just

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Speaker 2: have him come along. But it's different when I really

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Speaker 2: try to curate a place that can have experiences for

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Speaker 2: both of us to enjoy. Like one of the questions

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Speaker 2: Tribble has here is since our first vacation as a couple, however,

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Speaker 2: our trips and traveling personalities evolved, and for me, I

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Speaker 2: used to just look at it as any opportunity to

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Speaker 2: get on some sand, get in the beach, you know,

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Speaker 2: or get by a pool side so I can lay

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Speaker 2: out and just tan all day. Trying to drag de

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Speaker 2: Val out early mornings to sit in the sun to bake,

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Speaker 2: and I'm like, that's not fun for him either, So

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Speaker 2: vacations aren't fun when it's lopsided and we're only thinking

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Speaker 2: about what one person's interests are and not the other.

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Speaker 1: I just want to point out how much we've evolved. Yeah, right,

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Speaker 1: even even on this podcast. If people listen to season one, yeah,

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Speaker 1: season two, this podcast, it was a lot of us

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Speaker 1: telling the other person what we needed.

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Speaker 3: Therapy, y'all.

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Speaker 4: You know what I'm saying.

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Speaker 2: We joke about it in the show opening that we

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Speaker 2: get on each other as a form of therapy. In

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Speaker 2: this podcast, Yeah, but it literally like you guys have

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Speaker 2: literally walked through and sat through therapy sessions where we've

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Speaker 2: talked things out together. And I guess kind of indirectly,

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Speaker 2: Triple has been our therapist because of the questions and

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Speaker 2: the facts and the stats that she provides. You know,

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Speaker 2: that gives us kind of like a map or a

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Speaker 2: blueprint to speak and have these conversations openly.

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Speaker 1: Well no, but but I remember us talking about a

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Speaker 1: vacation on like season three, and it was a funny

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Speaker 1: debate about what you need and require on a vacation

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Speaker 1: and what I need and require on a vacation and

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Speaker 1: I even did a video about it after Essence Fest

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Speaker 1: when I was just like, listen, I'm gonna do I'll

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Speaker 1: do whatever you want to do during the day as

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Speaker 1: long as that night you busting it wide open, right,

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Speaker 1: And that's.

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Speaker 4: That's where it was.

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Speaker 1: You We was like, well, I want to ten, I

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Speaker 1: want to get up early, and I was like, fine,

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Speaker 1: I'll do all of that just so that when you

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Speaker 1: get back to the room, we can do what I

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Speaker 1: want to do. And now it's evolved to you telling

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Speaker 1: you saying I know that a DEVO doesn't like this,

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Speaker 1: so on vacation, I will curate the experience around the

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Speaker 1: fact that I know that these are things going to

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Speaker 1: make him happy. And now I'm talking about, well, I

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Speaker 1: know you need this, Like that's just the evolution. And

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Speaker 1: you get there too by vacations, right by knowing what

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Speaker 1: your partner likes and what they don't like. And at

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Speaker 1: first you start with, well, I'm going to do things

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Speaker 1: this way because it's what I need. Vacation is also

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Speaker 1: a vacation for me, so I'm going to get what

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Speaker 1: I get. But now it's evolved into this vacation is

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Speaker 1: for her or this vacation is for him.

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Speaker 4: Let me curate this experience for her.

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Speaker 1: And when you have two people, let me curate this

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Speaker 1: experience for him thinking about the other person. You both

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Speaker 1: get what you want for sure, and it happens selflessly.

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Speaker 1: And that's when you can fall into someone when you

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Speaker 1: go into a vacation and thinking, on this vacation, I'm

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Speaker 1: going to make sure my partner gets everything they want.

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Speaker 1: And I think that's that's like the subtlety of maturity,

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Speaker 1: you know, of realizing that everything ain't about me all

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Speaker 1: the time. But you only become mature if you actually

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Speaker 1: sit down with someone on a vacation and listen to

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Speaker 1: what they're saying.

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Speaker 2: No, absolutely, you know what I'm saying, one hundred percent

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Speaker 2: agree with you. And it's funny. I had a friend

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Speaker 2: recently let me know that, you know, her and her

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Speaker 2: husband were kind of at odds, and it was seemed

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Speaker 2: after speaking to her that it was just more of

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Speaker 2: her like a desperation to just spend time with him.

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Speaker 2: And she said that they have tried in a certain moments,

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Speaker 2: you know, to have someone come and watch the kids

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Speaker 2: and go for dinner, and like that just wasn't enough

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Speaker 2: for her. You know, and I think when you're in

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Speaker 2: a relationship and you feel like there's a deficit, you know,

427
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Speaker 2: feeling comfortable to be able to say, baby, you know what,

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Speaker 2: I think I need this.

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Speaker 3: Let me find a way to make it happen.

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Speaker 4: You know.

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Speaker 2: It's so it's so much more beneficial because a lot

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Speaker 2: lot of times the other in the group or in

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Speaker 2: the part in the in the duo may not even

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Speaker 2: see it. You know. For example, there were so many

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Speaker 2: times that your head was down and you were just working,

436
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Speaker 2: and you were working, and you were working and you

437
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Speaker 2: were working, and I was just like, Devo, like you

438
00:20:13,520 --> 00:20:16,000
Speaker 2: have to take a break. And you were like, how

439
00:20:16,040 --> 00:20:17,639
Speaker 2: can I take a break when we have all of

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Speaker 2: these things that we're trying to accomplish.

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Speaker 4: Like, there's no way that's true.

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Speaker 2: And I'm like, but I would like for you to

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00:20:22,640 --> 00:20:27,120
Speaker 2: be around and healthy and alive and refreshed. You need

444
00:20:27,160 --> 00:20:29,200
Speaker 2: to clock out sometimes, you need to turn your brain

445
00:20:29,240 --> 00:20:31,439
Speaker 2: off sometimes. And that's kind of where she was, And

446
00:20:31,440 --> 00:20:33,359
Speaker 2: that was the conversation I kind of encouraged her to

447
00:20:33,359 --> 00:20:35,840
Speaker 2: have with her husband, Like it was really also out

448
00:20:35,840 --> 00:20:37,679
Speaker 2: of a place of concern, though she felt like she

449
00:20:37,720 --> 00:20:40,359
Speaker 2: was being selfish wanting him to just kind of clock

450
00:20:40,400 --> 00:20:42,520
Speaker 2: out for a bit and tend to her. She's like,

451
00:20:42,560 --> 00:20:45,280
Speaker 2: I'm concerned that he's going to burn himself out. So

452
00:20:45,720 --> 00:20:47,520
Speaker 2: I encourage her to say, you know what, even if

453
00:20:47,520 --> 00:20:50,200
Speaker 2: financially things are a little tight, find a way, even

454
00:20:50,240 --> 00:20:53,440
Speaker 2: if it means sending the kids away, yeah for a weeknd.

455
00:20:53,359 --> 00:20:54,920
Speaker 1: A vacation, you know, that's that's a good point. A

456
00:20:55,000 --> 00:20:57,879
Speaker 1: vacation doesn't always mean you have to go somewhere. A

457
00:20:57,960 --> 00:21:01,280
Speaker 1: vacation also means, let's say these kids somewhere for a

458
00:21:01,280 --> 00:21:04,119
Speaker 1: couple of days, and let's just do what we do

459
00:21:04,160 --> 00:21:05,080
Speaker 1: in our own house.

460
00:21:05,359 --> 00:21:08,840
Speaker 3: Baby. The house be different when nobody in it knew

461
00:21:08,920 --> 00:21:09,240
Speaker 3: be different.

462
00:21:09,359 --> 00:21:10,320
Speaker 4: It's different, you know.

463
00:21:10,840 --> 00:21:13,400
Speaker 2: And I agree that sometimes people will need the change

464
00:21:13,400 --> 00:21:15,120
Speaker 2: of scenery because sometimes you need that too. You got

465
00:21:15,119 --> 00:21:17,720
Speaker 2: to get out of your space of you know, mundane

466
00:21:17,840 --> 00:21:21,800
Speaker 2: you know, day to day activities, but sometimes just trying

467
00:21:21,800 --> 00:21:23,960
Speaker 2: to find a way to recreate a space within your

468
00:21:23,960 --> 00:21:26,000
Speaker 2: home where there it's like a picnic in the backyard,

469
00:21:26,160 --> 00:21:29,119
Speaker 2: or like bringing a chef to cook, like that's a

470
00:21:29,160 --> 00:21:31,399
Speaker 2: cute moment too. Sometimes where you can just take a

471
00:21:31,440 --> 00:21:33,399
Speaker 2: day or two or even an overnight with just no

472
00:21:33,480 --> 00:21:34,400
Speaker 2: distraction so.

473
00:21:35,359 --> 00:21:36,200
Speaker 4: I'll say this too.

474
00:21:36,400 --> 00:21:40,159
Speaker 1: I noticed when we're on our vacations as opposed to

475
00:21:40,560 --> 00:21:44,720
Speaker 1: like family vacations or even vacations with friends where you're hosting.

476
00:21:44,800 --> 00:21:47,879
Speaker 1: Right when you don't have to worry about anybody else

477
00:21:48,520 --> 00:21:51,320
Speaker 1: except for you, You just you're in a lighter mood.

478
00:21:52,040 --> 00:21:54,239
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, like not having on a schedule or like

479
00:21:54,400 --> 00:21:55,880
Speaker 2: following a timeline.

480
00:21:55,480 --> 00:21:56,320
Speaker 4: Things like that. Yeah.

481
00:21:56,359 --> 00:22:00,720
Speaker 1: But also just when there's not a child attached to

482
00:22:00,800 --> 00:22:04,360
Speaker 1: your ankle or your boob or your back or wanting something,

483
00:22:04,760 --> 00:22:07,119
Speaker 1: it's like I get to see you be a little

484
00:22:07,119 --> 00:22:11,800
Speaker 1: bit more relaxed, you know. And I know, and I'm

485
00:22:11,800 --> 00:22:14,640
Speaker 1: not big on this, like masculine feminine energy. I really

486
00:22:14,640 --> 00:22:17,680
Speaker 1: don't get it right, but I will notice that you're

487
00:22:17,720 --> 00:22:19,080
Speaker 1: when you're in mom mode.

488
00:22:19,920 --> 00:22:22,320
Speaker 4: When you're in mom mode, like your.

489
00:22:22,359 --> 00:22:26,480
Speaker 1: Feminine energy is way different than when you're in wife mode.

490
00:22:26,480 --> 00:22:29,120
Speaker 3: Because that shit ain't soft, man, They be talking about.

491
00:22:28,880 --> 00:22:33,280
Speaker 2: This soft like soft soft parenting. Don't get it twisted. Okay,

492
00:22:33,480 --> 00:22:35,080
Speaker 2: when I'm in mom mode, and I think it's in

493
00:22:35,119 --> 00:22:37,640
Speaker 2: part two, just the way we parent, Like yes, I'm

494
00:22:37,640 --> 00:22:39,200
Speaker 2: going to be nurturing and I'm going to be motherly,

495
00:22:39,280 --> 00:22:41,600
Speaker 2: but like we have these boys in line, you know,

496
00:22:41,680 --> 00:22:45,040
Speaker 2: so you see a different side of feminine there. Absolutely

497
00:22:45,160 --> 00:22:48,600
Speaker 2: Then when you get like your girlfriends like Kadeen, the

498
00:22:48,640 --> 00:22:53,800
Speaker 2: girlfriend Kadeen, like my person, Kadeen, you know, my sex partner,

499
00:22:53,840 --> 00:22:56,280
Speaker 2: Like that's complete too, completely different different.

500
00:22:56,040 --> 00:22:58,159
Speaker 4: Now it is you even different?

501
00:22:58,200 --> 00:23:01,000
Speaker 1: Like when we were out when our only vacation one night,

502
00:23:01,040 --> 00:23:02,320
Speaker 1: you had on a turtleneck.

503
00:23:02,760 --> 00:23:04,920
Speaker 4: He was in the fucking Bahamas.

504
00:23:05,200 --> 00:23:07,600
Speaker 1: It was one hundred and eighty seven degrees outside and

505
00:23:07,680 --> 00:23:08,720
Speaker 1: you had on a turtleneck.

506
00:23:08,880 --> 00:23:10,919
Speaker 3: It was not a turtlight. It might have been like

507
00:23:10,960 --> 00:23:11,440
Speaker 3: high necked.

508
00:23:11,760 --> 00:23:13,159
Speaker 1: It was a high neck something. But I thought she's

509
00:23:13,200 --> 00:23:15,440
Speaker 1: going to pass out. And I was like, you're gonna

510
00:23:15,440 --> 00:23:18,359
Speaker 1: wear sleeves out. He was like, you know, the boys

511
00:23:18,400 --> 00:23:19,920
Speaker 1: are here, and I was just like, yeah, I'm worried

512
00:23:19,920 --> 00:23:23,280
Speaker 1: about the heat. Made like it's hot, Like I get it.

513
00:23:23,280 --> 00:23:25,399
Speaker 1: I get to see cleavage, I get it. I'm talking

514
00:23:25,440 --> 00:23:27,720
Speaker 1: about I'm worried, and you just like yeah, but the boys,

515
00:23:27,960 --> 00:23:31,440
Speaker 1: And it's just it's different to watch you be a mom.

516
00:23:31,920 --> 00:23:34,600
Speaker 1: And sometimes I don't even think people understand why when

517
00:23:34,640 --> 00:23:37,640
Speaker 1: I post videos of you sometimes and you look sexy,

518
00:23:38,320 --> 00:23:41,040
Speaker 1: it's because you don't walk around like that all the time,

519
00:23:41,520 --> 00:23:44,119
Speaker 1: Like a lot of times you have on sweatpants and

520
00:23:44,160 --> 00:23:45,520
Speaker 1: you look like a mom.

521
00:23:46,160 --> 00:23:47,600
Speaker 4: Right you know what I'm saying, Like what.

522
00:23:47,520 --> 00:23:48,600
Speaker 3: I look like now right here?

523
00:23:48,640 --> 00:23:51,600
Speaker 4: Pulled out you you either got the big robe on.

524
00:23:51,960 --> 00:23:54,800
Speaker 3: I love that. It's just a place of comfort for me.

525
00:23:55,200 --> 00:23:57,040
Speaker 2: You know how some people just feel like, oh, this

526
00:23:57,119 --> 00:23:58,280
Speaker 2: just feels like a hole.

527
00:23:58,320 --> 00:24:00,639
Speaker 1: You got to stop people stealing people's bar robes when

528
00:24:00,680 --> 00:24:03,360
Speaker 1: you go on vacations. We got about seven, We got

529
00:24:03,359 --> 00:24:08,000
Speaker 1: about seven bar robes from the ritz fumlike all these places,

530
00:24:08,560 --> 00:24:09,640
Speaker 1: and you can't tell me to stop.

531
00:24:09,680 --> 00:24:11,840
Speaker 4: The last video I posted it had writs on it.

532
00:24:13,480 --> 00:24:15,280
Speaker 3: Now you're gonna have me banned from the writs.

533
00:24:15,680 --> 00:24:17,040
Speaker 4: They can't ban this from the rits.

534
00:24:17,240 --> 00:24:18,720
Speaker 2: You know, to me, it's just a party and gift

535
00:24:18,720 --> 00:24:20,760
Speaker 2: some times. And I'm thinking most of the times, if

536
00:24:20,760 --> 00:24:22,240
Speaker 2: they don't see the robe any of that, they'd probably

537
00:24:22,280 --> 00:24:24,320
Speaker 2: just charge your room for it anyway. But the one

538
00:24:24,400 --> 00:24:25,720
Speaker 2: robe that I did fall in love with was the

539
00:24:25,800 --> 00:24:27,520
Speaker 2: road that you got on that last film that you

540
00:24:27,560 --> 00:24:29,720
Speaker 2: did in Canada, and you were gonna leave it behind,

541
00:24:29,720 --> 00:24:32,480
Speaker 2: and I was like, leave this rode behind with the hood.

542
00:24:32,280 --> 00:24:33,960
Speaker 3: And it's funny. It just feels like a hug and

543
00:24:33,960 --> 00:24:36,280
Speaker 3: sometimes I need that if you're not here. And that's

544
00:24:36,280 --> 00:24:36,960
Speaker 3: what the robe is for.

545
00:24:37,000 --> 00:24:40,680
Speaker 1: Mean about to create an international incident stealing robes from Canada.

546
00:24:41,160 --> 00:24:42,520
Speaker 4: It's a Canadian road, baby.

547
00:24:42,680 --> 00:24:45,400
Speaker 3: No that you were gifted that robe from Netflix.

548
00:24:46,000 --> 00:24:49,800
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, don't putt talking about you from the No,

549
00:24:49,840 --> 00:24:51,119
Speaker 2: I did not take it from the hotel.

550
00:24:51,160 --> 00:24:52,879
Speaker 3: You see hear me making me out to be a

551
00:24:52,920 --> 00:24:53,760
Speaker 3: one big teeth.

552
00:24:53,880 --> 00:24:55,720
Speaker 4: I told y'all's the genile man.

553
00:24:55,720 --> 00:24:57,600
Speaker 1: She don't ever spend a bad I am not a

554
00:24:57,760 --> 00:24:59,520
Speaker 1: Jeni steal some stuff she liked.

555
00:24:59,560 --> 00:25:01,760
Speaker 2: That's not okay to me. Is I'm spending my good,

556
00:25:01,760 --> 00:25:03,520
Speaker 2: good money up in there. If I have a parting

557
00:25:03,520 --> 00:25:06,320
Speaker 2: gift or too, Oh well deal with it.

558
00:25:06,400 --> 00:25:09,720
Speaker 4: By women be the biggest thieves. I hope y'all know that. No,

559
00:25:09,720 --> 00:25:10,119
Speaker 4: no there.

560
00:25:11,160 --> 00:25:13,120
Speaker 3: Do you remember that time? I remember that.

561
00:25:13,200 --> 00:25:17,840
Speaker 4: Time there was a study on who steals the most? Right,

562
00:25:18,119 --> 00:25:20,040
Speaker 4: a study? You know who steals the most?

563
00:25:20,359 --> 00:25:20,479
Speaker 1: No?

564
00:25:20,600 --> 00:25:22,640
Speaker 4: Lie, older white women?

565
00:25:22,800 --> 00:25:26,760
Speaker 3: Yeah? Do you remember that time? Back in Brooklyn? We

566
00:25:26,800 --> 00:25:30,280
Speaker 3: went to Red Lobster for lunch one day and there

567
00:25:30,359 --> 00:25:33,000
Speaker 3: was it looked a mother and daughter.

568
00:25:33,840 --> 00:25:36,480
Speaker 2: It looks like a mother and daughter duo because one

569
00:25:36,520 --> 00:25:39,120
Speaker 2: was significantly older than the other, and there were two

570
00:25:39,119 --> 00:25:42,159
Speaker 2: white ladies. It was like gateway Red Lobster that like

571
00:25:42,960 --> 00:25:45,160
Speaker 2: no white people normally, like.

572
00:25:45,080 --> 00:25:46,399
Speaker 3: That's our hood, you know what I'm saying.

573
00:25:47,119 --> 00:25:49,439
Speaker 2: And they were sitting across from us and they were

574
00:25:49,480 --> 00:25:52,680
Speaker 2: eating their food, but they had on sunglasses and dad hats,

575
00:25:52,760 --> 00:25:57,080
Speaker 2: eating in red lobsters of course, very unassuming. Right, So

576
00:25:57,119 --> 00:25:59,720
Speaker 2: we're sitting there, sitting there. They eventually get up and leave,

577
00:25:59,800 --> 00:26:02,119
Speaker 2: and we're not really paying much attention to them. And

578
00:26:02,119 --> 00:26:03,920
Speaker 2: then when you see the server come back and was like, no,

579
00:26:04,080 --> 00:26:08,000
Speaker 2: the fuck they did not, and that they walked out.

580
00:26:07,880 --> 00:26:08,320
Speaker 4: On the bill.

581
00:26:08,920 --> 00:26:11,239
Speaker 2: They walked out on the bill, And I was so

582
00:26:12,000 --> 00:26:14,639
Speaker 2: hurt and upset in that moment. Somebody, I know what

583
00:26:14,640 --> 00:26:16,960
Speaker 2: they were gonna do on a trip, thet little asses on.

584
00:26:16,920 --> 00:26:21,760
Speaker 1: The way and stealing looking old kadeens privileged and stealing

585
00:26:22,760 --> 00:26:24,600
Speaker 1: robes from Red Lobster.

586
00:26:24,880 --> 00:26:27,119
Speaker 2: I'm definitely not old, nor am I white, So I

587
00:26:27,160 --> 00:26:28,680
Speaker 2: don't know how I feel in that category.

588
00:26:29,720 --> 00:26:31,480
Speaker 4: Robes you'll be stealing.

589
00:26:32,720 --> 00:26:36,360
Speaker 3: No, I mean stealing chadababy biscuit mixed.

590
00:26:36,840 --> 00:26:39,119
Speaker 1: There's never there's never been a biscuit made like a

591
00:26:39,200 --> 00:26:40,080
Speaker 1: cheda baby biscuit.

592
00:26:40,400 --> 00:26:41,000
Speaker 3: That's a fact.

593
00:26:41,200 --> 00:26:44,119
Speaker 1: That's I'm still do yourself a favor, right, go on

594
00:26:44,119 --> 00:26:47,240
Speaker 1: to vacation the red Lobster, get your get your wife

595
00:26:47,320 --> 00:26:48,760
Speaker 1: or your girl from Chainna Baby Biscuits.

596
00:26:48,760 --> 00:26:49,800
Speaker 4: She's gonna fall in love with you.

597
00:26:49,880 --> 00:26:52,000
Speaker 2: I think they even have the mix now in supermarkets.

598
00:26:52,040 --> 00:26:53,480
Speaker 2: I got to go look for that. I don't know

599
00:26:53,480 --> 00:26:56,720
Speaker 2: if I would do it before I do my detax.

600
00:26:56,840 --> 00:26:58,320
Speaker 2: I can't have cheddar cheese. I'm allergic.

601
00:26:59,320 --> 00:27:00,000
Speaker 4: Dang your life.

602
00:27:00,119 --> 00:27:02,280
Speaker 3: Oh bro, what am I shark? What are my shark

603
00:27:02,320 --> 00:27:02,920
Speaker 3: hooterie boards?

604
00:27:03,960 --> 00:27:05,359
Speaker 4: Josh laugh in the background.

605
00:27:05,400 --> 00:27:07,440
Speaker 2: I love how y'all laugh at my demise right now,

606
00:27:07,600 --> 00:27:08,439
Speaker 2: it's not your demise.

607
00:27:08,480 --> 00:27:10,800
Speaker 4: You're gonna feel and look great.

608
00:27:11,000 --> 00:27:13,359
Speaker 2: So when I bring a vegan shark hooterie board to

609
00:27:13,400 --> 00:27:15,280
Speaker 2: your next event, y'all get excited.

610
00:27:16,080 --> 00:27:18,639
Speaker 3: Get excited, get excited.

611
00:27:18,800 --> 00:27:21,639
Speaker 4: You better make a regular excited because I can't. I

612
00:27:21,640 --> 00:27:23,520
Speaker 4: can't do that. I can't do vegan cheese.

613
00:27:24,160 --> 00:27:24,960
Speaker 3: Oh my god.

614
00:27:25,960 --> 00:27:28,440
Speaker 2: Do you think we've ever had a bad vacation where

615
00:27:28,440 --> 00:27:29,760
Speaker 2: we didn't get along or anything.

616
00:27:30,000 --> 00:27:32,159
Speaker 1: No, I can't remember one time we've ever been on

617
00:27:32,880 --> 00:27:35,600
Speaker 1: vacation just you and I and had a bad time.

618
00:27:35,680 --> 00:27:39,119
Speaker 1: I remember being broke in college and staying at the

619
00:27:39,200 --> 00:27:43,080
Speaker 1: ram Inn because the Ada or Ramata had fell off

620
00:27:43,119 --> 00:27:45,280
Speaker 1: the hotel, so we was calling.

621
00:27:44,960 --> 00:27:45,720
Speaker 4: It the ram Inn.

622
00:27:46,800 --> 00:27:47,879
Speaker 3: And that's exactly what we did.

623
00:27:48,000 --> 00:27:51,040
Speaker 4: That's what we did. But we enjoyed our shot.

624
00:27:51,680 --> 00:27:53,120
Speaker 3: It was given those kind of vibes.

625
00:27:54,320 --> 00:27:54,920
Speaker 4: Yeah, we were.

626
00:27:54,920 --> 00:27:57,280
Speaker 2: That was I think that was my first trip out

627
00:27:57,280 --> 00:27:59,760
Speaker 2: of the state with someone other than my parents.

628
00:28:00,240 --> 00:28:01,240
Speaker 3: But we had such a time.

629
00:28:01,280 --> 00:28:03,280
Speaker 2: We got in my little toil to wrap four we

630
00:28:03,520 --> 00:28:06,280
Speaker 2: called the Green Machine, and packed it up for a

631
00:28:06,320 --> 00:28:07,160
Speaker 2: nice little weekend.

632
00:28:07,320 --> 00:28:09,280
Speaker 3: This printed out the map quest.

633
00:28:09,280 --> 00:28:14,080
Speaker 1: About to say, this is how pre uh tech this was.

634
00:28:14,280 --> 00:28:17,199
Speaker 1: There was no iPhones, Nope, there was no GPS that

635
00:28:17,280 --> 00:28:19,760
Speaker 1: you could just attached to your car. We had to

636
00:28:19,800 --> 00:28:22,439
Speaker 1: print out the map quest physically printed out, and we

637
00:28:22,600 --> 00:28:25,600
Speaker 1: marked off all of the mild markers where we had

638
00:28:25,600 --> 00:28:28,800
Speaker 1: to exit, and we set the odometer to zero, and

639
00:28:28,880 --> 00:28:30,959
Speaker 1: every time we got to that mild mark we got

640
00:28:30,960 --> 00:28:33,080
Speaker 1: seventeen miles before I exit, and every.

641
00:28:32,840 --> 00:28:34,200
Speaker 4: Time we get there, we would set it and.

642
00:28:34,119 --> 00:28:36,320
Speaker 1: We were looking at seventeen that we go bout and

643
00:28:36,400 --> 00:28:39,200
Speaker 1: we reset it to zero, and we would just keep

644
00:28:39,280 --> 00:28:40,080
Speaker 1: hitting the marks.

645
00:28:40,120 --> 00:28:40,840
Speaker 3: And we didn't have.

646
00:28:40,760 --> 00:28:42,680
Speaker 2: Ways to alert us of cops, so I would be

647
00:28:42,760 --> 00:28:45,520
Speaker 2: on the lookout like all right, babe, this is a stretch.

648
00:28:45,760 --> 00:28:47,360
Speaker 3: There's some rails here, so you good.

649
00:28:47,400 --> 00:28:51,120
Speaker 1: No popo noo, I'll be doing like ninety five in

650
00:28:51,120 --> 00:28:54,080
Speaker 1: the rap four because it did not go past night accelerated.

651
00:28:54,160 --> 00:28:56,560
Speaker 4: It was like hm, it was.

652
00:28:56,520 --> 00:28:59,200
Speaker 1: Like coughing, like please, don't take these gas no more.

653
00:28:59,800 --> 00:29:04,080
Speaker 1: But those so fun, I think about it. We found

654
00:29:04,080 --> 00:29:07,440
Speaker 1: out about the foundation we have as a couple. Were like, okay,

655
00:29:07,440 --> 00:29:09,880
Speaker 1: we got to get to Virginia. Let's go to map Quest,

656
00:29:09,960 --> 00:29:12,480
Speaker 1: let's print this out. You had your job, I had

657
00:29:12,520 --> 00:29:15,880
Speaker 1: my job. It was like we had a camaraderie, a.

658
00:29:15,840 --> 00:29:18,680
Speaker 2: Teamwork, and that goes to show that we had so

659
00:29:18,800 --> 00:29:20,840
Speaker 2: much fun and we were able to do this vacation

660
00:29:21,600 --> 00:29:22,440
Speaker 2: on you know.

661
00:29:22,640 --> 00:29:24,640
Speaker 4: A couples money had no money.

662
00:29:24,680 --> 00:29:26,920
Speaker 2: So Divell and I were able to vacation throughout the

663
00:29:26,960 --> 00:29:29,640
Speaker 2: course of our almost twenty one years in so many

664
00:29:29,680 --> 00:29:32,760
Speaker 2: different way shapes and forms that we always had a

665
00:29:32,800 --> 00:29:34,040
Speaker 2: good time about how we got.

666
00:29:33,880 --> 00:29:34,480
Speaker 4: The money for that.

667
00:29:35,480 --> 00:29:37,760
Speaker 1: Remember my father used to give me one hundred dollars

668
00:29:37,800 --> 00:29:41,280
Speaker 1: every month, and then my brother would give would split

669
00:29:41,320 --> 00:29:43,360
Speaker 1: his pel check. Yes, so I would get a thousand

670
00:29:43,440 --> 00:29:45,600
Speaker 1: dollars in the beginning of the semester and I just

671
00:29:45,680 --> 00:29:48,160
Speaker 1: put a little bit of moneyside and said, I'm going

672
00:29:48,240 --> 00:29:51,880
Speaker 1: to cover the hotel and he was like, I'll cover gas,

673
00:29:51,960 --> 00:29:53,520
Speaker 1: gas and co and food.

674
00:29:53,960 --> 00:29:56,640
Speaker 4: And it's literally the same way we live our life.

675
00:29:56,680 --> 00:29:56,840
Speaker 1: Now.

676
00:29:56,880 --> 00:29:57,880
Speaker 4: It's like, okay, I'll.

677
00:29:57,720 --> 00:30:02,080
Speaker 1: Cover room and boarding and you handle all the incidental

678
00:30:02,080 --> 00:30:03,120
Speaker 1: stuff activities.

679
00:30:04,640 --> 00:30:05,520
Speaker 3: Yeah, we're still been.

680
00:30:05,440 --> 00:30:07,400
Speaker 4: Doing it since nineteen Come on, baby.

681
00:30:07,480 --> 00:30:09,400
Speaker 2: I love that is that we know our strengths and

682
00:30:09,440 --> 00:30:11,800
Speaker 2: weaknesses too, Like you know your thing is like, all right,

683
00:30:12,080 --> 00:30:14,280
Speaker 2: you plan all the logistics. I don't know if you

684
00:30:14,360 --> 00:30:16,600
Speaker 2: ever asked a vowel, if you ever catch him on

685
00:30:16,640 --> 00:30:19,760
Speaker 2: the door on the way to the airport, and if

686
00:30:19,800 --> 00:30:21,240
Speaker 2: you were to stop him and say the volt where

687
00:30:21,240 --> 00:30:22,120
Speaker 2: you going to say?

688
00:30:22,160 --> 00:30:22,760
Speaker 4: I don't know.

689
00:30:23,600 --> 00:30:25,840
Speaker 3: The most devow will know is maybe the country or

690
00:30:25,840 --> 00:30:27,600
Speaker 3: the island that we're going to. But did I don't

691
00:30:27,600 --> 00:30:29,600
Speaker 3: know how we get in there? You don't know flight time,

692
00:30:30,200 --> 00:30:32,320
Speaker 3: like numbers. He don't have to know that because I do.

693
00:30:33,240 --> 00:30:35,440
Speaker 3: I'll just be walking and dragging bag.

694
00:30:35,560 --> 00:30:37,640
Speaker 1: No, this is what I asked, how many bags do

695
00:30:37,680 --> 00:30:41,440
Speaker 1: we have total? Because I'm the one responsible for a bag,

696
00:30:41,800 --> 00:30:43,600
Speaker 1: so I'll be like, okay, we got four big bags.

697
00:30:43,800 --> 00:30:45,720
Speaker 1: I got help here. I got Jackson. You take that one,

698
00:30:45,800 --> 00:30:48,360
Speaker 1: Cairo take this one. I'll get these two. If the

699
00:30:48,400 --> 00:30:50,920
Speaker 1: bag is too big for Cairo, I'm like, yo, Jackson,

700
00:30:50,960 --> 00:30:53,880
Speaker 1: you got that bag, I'll give these three. Kay, We'll

701
00:30:53,880 --> 00:30:57,520
Speaker 1: have her chades on everybody's documentation.

702
00:30:58,560 --> 00:31:01,440
Speaker 4: That walking off, that's it wokeing off fast.

703
00:31:01,480 --> 00:31:05,080
Speaker 1: And it's been me, hey, follow your mother, father, motherly mother, mother,

704
00:31:05,520 --> 00:31:07,280
Speaker 1: I'm that pushing the stroller.

705
00:31:07,840 --> 00:31:10,040
Speaker 4: You check everybody in. I'm just giving the bad tags.

706
00:31:10,040 --> 00:31:11,400
Speaker 4: We have our system, we have a sister.

707
00:31:11,560 --> 00:31:12,120
Speaker 3: It's a lot.

708
00:31:12,240 --> 00:31:15,360
Speaker 2: It's a lot to like approach a TSA agent and

709
00:31:15,360 --> 00:31:18,080
Speaker 2: then you got six people, and then the TSA agents

710
00:31:18,160 --> 00:31:20,480
Speaker 2: never know what they want. So as some people want

711
00:31:20,480 --> 00:31:22,400
Speaker 2: you to open it to the passport page, some people

712
00:31:22,480 --> 00:31:24,440
Speaker 2: want you to give them all the passports at one time.

713
00:31:24,480 --> 00:31:27,720
Speaker 2: Some people want each person holding their respective passport.

714
00:31:27,440 --> 00:31:28,280
Speaker 3: So you just never know.

715
00:31:28,320 --> 00:31:31,040
Speaker 2: It's like it's like a surprise every time you go

716
00:31:31,120 --> 00:31:34,240
Speaker 2: through TSA. Some days take your laptops out, some days don't.

717
00:31:34,640 --> 00:31:37,000
Speaker 2: So nothing is ever consistent. So that's why I feel

718
00:31:37,040 --> 00:31:38,640
Speaker 2: like I need to be the one in control of

719
00:31:38,640 --> 00:31:41,160
Speaker 2: those things, because you at least can kind of bring

720
00:31:41,240 --> 00:31:42,840
Speaker 2: up the rear, right, you.

721
00:31:42,800 --> 00:31:44,560
Speaker 4: Know, I don't mind bringing up the real baby.

722
00:31:44,600 --> 00:31:45,280
Speaker 3: What would be your.

723
00:31:47,360 --> 00:31:49,440
Speaker 4: As long as you bring the ray on vacation.

724
00:31:49,320 --> 00:31:53,160
Speaker 2: Listen, the rear ain't going nowhere. Clearly, clearly this is

725
00:31:53,160 --> 00:31:53,760
Speaker 2: for life.

726
00:31:54,560 --> 00:31:56,320
Speaker 3: What would be a dream vacation you have, like a

727
00:31:56,400 --> 00:31:59,760
Speaker 3: dream place or a dream activity, or like.

728
00:31:59,760 --> 00:32:01,840
Speaker 4: What my dream vacation would be.

729
00:32:01,880 --> 00:32:04,160
Speaker 3: You know, I'm all about being a genie, and I'm.

730
00:32:04,040 --> 00:32:07,600
Speaker 1: All my dream vacation would be going where we were

731
00:32:07,600 --> 00:32:09,960
Speaker 1: supposed to go on my thirty fifth birthday. I want

732
00:32:10,000 --> 00:32:12,720
Speaker 1: to go to Cairo and see the Pyramids. I want

733
00:32:12,800 --> 00:32:15,120
Speaker 1: us to do that on our own. I don't want

734
00:32:15,160 --> 00:32:18,200
Speaker 1: to take the kids because I don't want to. I

735
00:32:18,240 --> 00:32:21,880
Speaker 1: can't enjoy an experience when I have to watch you

736
00:32:22,440 --> 00:32:24,080
Speaker 1: and for a little people. For sure, you know what

737
00:32:24,080 --> 00:32:27,800
Speaker 1: I'm saying. Strictly, I'm in dad security mode and I'll

738
00:32:27,840 --> 00:32:29,600
Speaker 1: be missing a lot of stuff because I'm like.

739
00:32:29,480 --> 00:32:32,760
Speaker 4: Okay, the person who's the person who got a bathroom.

740
00:32:32,640 --> 00:32:35,680
Speaker 1: Who's hungry, stop running over there, get off the edge.

741
00:32:35,880 --> 00:32:37,600
Speaker 1: That's not ours, that's not ours.

742
00:32:37,600 --> 00:32:39,160
Speaker 4: You know what I'm saying. It's like I'm always saying.

743
00:32:38,960 --> 00:32:41,360
Speaker 3: Something, Oh is that person at the top of the sphinx.

744
00:32:41,520 --> 00:32:44,320
Speaker 4: Oh that's Cairo, Cairo.

745
00:32:44,480 --> 00:32:47,040
Speaker 2: Down the side of the sphinx that he just climbed

746
00:32:47,720 --> 00:32:48,520
Speaker 2: and then he's gonna come down.

747
00:32:48,560 --> 00:32:51,840
Speaker 4: Dad, it was easy. Oh you're not supposed to do it.

748
00:32:52,040 --> 00:32:54,520
Speaker 1: I don't care if it was easy, absolutely, But I

749
00:32:54,560 --> 00:32:56,840
Speaker 1: want to go to Cairo.

750
00:32:57,360 --> 00:32:58,120
Speaker 3: And that would.

751
00:32:58,000 --> 00:33:01,360
Speaker 2: Be probably a mix of little education, like being out

752
00:33:01,440 --> 00:33:04,080
Speaker 2: because we don't necessarily when we're on vacations kind of

753
00:33:04,160 --> 00:33:05,880
Speaker 2: venture out sometimes because I feel like we.

754
00:33:05,920 --> 00:33:07,360
Speaker 4: Always remember when we went to Saint Lucia.

755
00:33:08,200 --> 00:33:08,880
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, we did.

756
00:33:08,920 --> 00:33:09,200
Speaker 4: We did.

757
00:33:09,200 --> 00:33:11,920
Speaker 1: When we say Lucia, we went to Dominican republics, we

758
00:33:11,920 --> 00:33:14,400
Speaker 1: did the zip line it like, that's my thing. When

759
00:33:14,480 --> 00:33:17,480
Speaker 1: with us too, just us too, we do go out

760
00:33:17,520 --> 00:33:20,720
Speaker 1: and venture off. When we just let you sleep in first, Yes,

761
00:33:21,600 --> 00:33:23,920
Speaker 1: certain days, because some days you want to get up

762
00:33:23,920 --> 00:33:25,720
Speaker 1: early in ten. I'm like, fine, I'll get up, I'll

763
00:33:25,720 --> 00:33:28,480
Speaker 1: find me an umbrella with shade. I'll lay back down

764
00:33:28,520 --> 00:33:29,360
Speaker 1: and let her ten.

765
00:33:29,640 --> 00:33:31,080
Speaker 2: Or let you sleep in and I'm like, baby, I'm

766
00:33:31,080 --> 00:33:32,560
Speaker 2: gonna get my coffee beat me at the pool.

767
00:33:32,600 --> 00:33:34,200
Speaker 4: Like, well, I don't. I don't do the sleeping thing

768
00:33:34,240 --> 00:33:36,400
Speaker 4: no more. I used to remember, I used to.

769
00:33:36,400 --> 00:33:37,760
Speaker 3: That's one way we evolved.

770
00:33:37,880 --> 00:33:38,560
Speaker 4: We have evolved.

771
00:33:38,560 --> 00:33:41,080
Speaker 1: We used to, but now I like being up early

772
00:33:41,200 --> 00:33:42,800
Speaker 1: because I want to get the sun.

773
00:33:43,080 --> 00:33:44,680
Speaker 4: You want to enjoy the I want to enjoy the day.

774
00:33:44,720 --> 00:33:45,400
Speaker 4: You know what I'm saying.

775
00:33:45,600 --> 00:33:48,080
Speaker 1: I'll sleep when it's dark outside, but I no longer

776
00:33:48,120 --> 00:33:49,959
Speaker 1: want to miss the beauty of what the day is.

777
00:33:50,360 --> 00:33:53,120
Speaker 1: I think in my youth, it was always like, oh,

778
00:33:53,160 --> 00:33:54,680
Speaker 1: you'll have time, just get sleep.

779
00:33:54,720 --> 00:33:55,760
Speaker 4: You'll have time to get sleep.

780
00:33:56,160 --> 00:33:59,040
Speaker 1: But now, even when I'm home, when I used to

781
00:33:59,120 --> 00:34:01,440
Speaker 1: go in the theater and watch films and watch movies,

782
00:34:01,480 --> 00:34:04,880
Speaker 1: so watch I'm Now I'm like, Yo, Matt, Josh, it's

783
00:34:04,960 --> 00:34:05,520
Speaker 1: nice outstide.

784
00:34:05,560 --> 00:34:07,120
Speaker 4: Let's go on the man, Let's go outside. You know

785
00:34:07,160 --> 00:34:08,480
Speaker 4: what I'm saying. Let's let's do something.

786
00:34:08,560 --> 00:34:14,440
Speaker 1: If I'm a smoke, I'm a smoke outside on the balcony,

787
00:34:14,800 --> 00:34:15,359
Speaker 1: you know what I'm saying.

788
00:34:15,360 --> 00:34:16,360
Speaker 3: But it's that video.

789
00:34:16,920 --> 00:34:20,400
Speaker 1: I'd rather just be outside enjoying what's happening and to

790
00:34:20,440 --> 00:34:23,000
Speaker 1: be inside. So I've evolved. I like to get up

791
00:34:23,040 --> 00:34:27,480
Speaker 1: early on vacation. Now I also like to watch you

792
00:34:27,600 --> 00:34:31,160
Speaker 1: learn stuff. I'm the one to watch documentaries. I'm the

793
00:34:31,160 --> 00:34:33,440
Speaker 1: one that will learn about stuff because that's just how

794
00:34:33,480 --> 00:34:36,400
Speaker 1: my mind works, and I feel like sometimes you just

795
00:34:36,520 --> 00:34:39,840
Speaker 1: like to enjoy being out and not having it do anything.

796
00:34:40,400 --> 00:34:42,840
Speaker 2: But yeah, I like not having to think sometimes about it.

797
00:34:42,880 --> 00:34:44,640
Speaker 2: Who has to be weird and how and what?

798
00:34:45,000 --> 00:34:49,480
Speaker 1: But I also enjoy watching you enjoy new experiences, you know,

799
00:34:49,719 --> 00:34:51,120
Speaker 1: Like I know you don't like doing a lot of

800
00:34:51,120 --> 00:34:54,120
Speaker 1: physical stuff, but when we walked up the piton when

801
00:34:54,120 --> 00:34:57,879
Speaker 1: we were in Saint Lucia, you were like, you were like, wow,

802
00:34:57,920 --> 00:34:59,600
Speaker 1: that was great. You know what I'm saying. It was

803
00:34:59,640 --> 00:35:01,879
Speaker 1: just all of different experience. I feel like, open up

804
00:35:02,440 --> 00:35:03,720
Speaker 1: new things, trying.

805
00:35:03,640 --> 00:35:05,520
Speaker 2: New things, right because I feel like, if I'm going

806
00:35:05,600 --> 00:35:08,719
Speaker 2: to try something new, why not do it in the

807
00:35:08,760 --> 00:35:11,799
Speaker 2: comfort of your company, right? You know that for me

808
00:35:12,000 --> 00:35:14,360
Speaker 2: is always the best way to make a memory, to

809
00:35:14,440 --> 00:35:17,279
Speaker 2: experience something new, to have someone there to motivate me

810
00:35:17,320 --> 00:35:20,040
Speaker 2: along the way. If I'm apprehensive, like yeah, that's great.

811
00:35:20,239 --> 00:35:22,439
Speaker 2: Like I even think of my sister and her fiance now,

812
00:35:22,480 --> 00:35:24,880
Speaker 2: like he's a super traveler, Like he'll just he just

813
00:35:24,920 --> 00:35:26,719
Speaker 2: picked up and went to Scotland by himself, and I'm

814
00:35:26,760 --> 00:35:28,919
Speaker 2: like Scotland, like what's out there?

815
00:35:29,000 --> 00:35:29,200
Speaker 3: You know?

816
00:35:30,160 --> 00:35:32,520
Speaker 2: But it's just he's actually gotten her out of her

817
00:35:32,600 --> 00:35:34,960
Speaker 2: comfort zone to be able to just travel and enjoy

818
00:35:35,000 --> 00:35:38,160
Speaker 2: things and know that every vacation or every vacation is

819
00:35:38,200 --> 00:35:40,359
Speaker 2: not just going to be a luxury experience where you're

820
00:35:40,400 --> 00:35:42,680
Speaker 2: on a resort all day laying out, but you know,

821
00:35:42,880 --> 00:35:45,640
Speaker 2: trying to mingle with the locals a bit, you know,

822
00:35:45,760 --> 00:35:48,600
Speaker 2: trying to stay somewhere that's different than just your typical

823
00:35:48,680 --> 00:35:51,200
Speaker 2: resort or hotel, like maybe staying somewhere that's like in

824
00:35:51,680 --> 00:35:54,000
Speaker 2: you know, airbb Airbnb or something that's a little bit

825
00:35:54,040 --> 00:35:56,360
Speaker 2: more in the city so that you can experience things

826
00:35:56,680 --> 00:35:58,920
Speaker 2: like the locals, because I like to do that, especially

827
00:35:58,920 --> 00:36:00,640
Speaker 2: when I go to the islands. That's actually one of

828
00:36:00,680 --> 00:36:04,279
Speaker 2: my bucket list things, not necessarily my dream vacation, but

829
00:36:04,600 --> 00:36:06,520
Speaker 2: a bucket list thing for me is to touch every

830
00:36:06,520 --> 00:36:09,360
Speaker 2: island in the Caribbean. So I have a couple that

831
00:36:09,400 --> 00:36:12,640
Speaker 2: I still have to get to, but I think it

832
00:36:12,680 --> 00:36:14,760
Speaker 2: would be dope to do that. I think my dream vacation,

833
00:36:15,600 --> 00:36:17,800
Speaker 2: I'm trying to think of where I'd love.

834
00:36:17,600 --> 00:36:18,120
Speaker 3: To get to.

835
00:36:19,040 --> 00:36:25,279
Speaker 2: A couple parts in Africa, South Africa being one this year. Yeah,

836
00:36:25,360 --> 00:36:27,600
Speaker 2: South Africa, though I love to experience with the boys,

837
00:36:28,640 --> 00:36:29,319
Speaker 2: just to see it.

838
00:36:29,800 --> 00:36:34,239
Speaker 4: Why we can't do vacation and then the boys, we absolutely.

839
00:36:33,960 --> 00:36:36,279
Speaker 3: You asking me why we can't We absolutely can.

840
00:36:36,400 --> 00:36:38,239
Speaker 2: You know I'm never going to say no, we can

841
00:36:38,280 --> 00:36:41,080
Speaker 2: even go and like test it out first and then.

842
00:36:42,640 --> 00:36:43,560
Speaker 4: Why don't we just do that?

843
00:36:43,800 --> 00:36:46,960
Speaker 1: Yeah, somewhere we should go first, see what it's like

844
00:36:47,320 --> 00:36:49,520
Speaker 1: and then take them see if it's even worth because

845
00:36:49,520 --> 00:36:52,120
Speaker 1: sometimes I wouldn't want to take a five year old

846
00:36:52,640 --> 00:36:54,759
Speaker 1: some places because he's not going to care right and

847
00:36:54,760 --> 00:36:55,319
Speaker 1: the quote is.

848
00:36:55,239 --> 00:36:57,400
Speaker 2: Too young to enjoy some anything. That's the only downside

849
00:36:57,400 --> 00:36:59,680
Speaker 2: with having kids with such a big age difference. It's

850
00:36:59,680 --> 00:37:02,000
Speaker 2: like some things that we know Jackson will appreciate and

851
00:37:02,120 --> 00:37:04,640
Speaker 2: learn from and know Coda is not going to do it,

852
00:37:04,680 --> 00:37:06,160
Speaker 2: so we're gonna have to probably double back on some

853
00:37:06,200 --> 00:37:09,600
Speaker 2: places once he's older. Because Cairo's been dying to get

854
00:37:09,600 --> 00:37:12,040
Speaker 2: to Egypt. Even when we went to Barnes and Nobles

855
00:37:12,040 --> 00:37:13,600
Speaker 2: to get what's this summer, he was like in the

856
00:37:13,640 --> 00:37:16,560
Speaker 2: Egypt section, like that's my name. My name came from

857
00:37:16,600 --> 00:37:19,080
Speaker 2: here and there when they want to see the pyramids,

858
00:37:19,120 --> 00:37:21,560
Speaker 2: like he's excited to see that, So I think it'll

859
00:37:21,600 --> 00:37:23,839
Speaker 2: be dope. And then keeping up with the family while

860
00:37:23,840 --> 00:37:26,920
Speaker 2: we're away. So although we are disconnected to an extent.

861
00:37:26,800 --> 00:37:27,839
Speaker 4: We are not disconnected.

862
00:37:28,000 --> 00:37:30,840
Speaker 3: Yeah, I shouldn't say disconnected. Every night we're in a

863
00:37:30,840 --> 00:37:31,560
Speaker 3: different location.

864
00:37:31,719 --> 00:37:33,839
Speaker 4: I facetimed them kids every night. There's not.

865
00:37:35,480 --> 00:37:37,239
Speaker 1: That I don't say, hey, I'm just telling you I

866
00:37:37,320 --> 00:37:40,080
Speaker 1: love you when we wantedly it was a six hour difference,

867
00:37:40,080 --> 00:37:40,520
Speaker 1: I believe.

868
00:37:41,239 --> 00:37:43,080
Speaker 4: And every night, I don't care if it was three

869
00:37:43,120 --> 00:37:44,000
Speaker 4: in the morning.

870
00:37:44,160 --> 00:37:47,160
Speaker 1: Our time, our time, I'll be like, yo, yo, don't

871
00:37:47,200 --> 00:37:48,879
Speaker 1: go to sleep without saying a night to your dad.

872
00:37:49,040 --> 00:37:50,279
Speaker 4: No, for sure, night to your mom.

873
00:37:50,520 --> 00:37:53,799
Speaker 2: Absolutely So texting, facetiming, sending.

874
00:37:53,440 --> 00:37:55,480
Speaker 4: Pictures technologies made it that much easier.

875
00:37:55,520 --> 00:37:57,399
Speaker 3: It's so great. Like we went support a Fino while

876
00:37:57,400 --> 00:37:59,480
Speaker 3: we're in Italy, and the kids loved the movie Luca.

877
00:38:00,200 --> 00:38:05,120
Speaker 3: So while I was there Albert.

878
00:38:04,400 --> 00:38:06,319
Speaker 2: So while I was there, I took a ton of

879
00:38:06,320 --> 00:38:08,279
Speaker 2: like photo and video and sent it to Jackson. I

880
00:38:08,320 --> 00:38:10,279
Speaker 2: was like, show you brothers, this is where Luca was

881
00:38:10,640 --> 00:38:14,080
Speaker 2: inspired by. So that's super fun. So moral of the

882
00:38:14,120 --> 00:38:18,120
Speaker 2: story is, y'all, if you gott obey vacate with them

883
00:38:18,520 --> 00:38:21,920
Speaker 2: for sure. All right, We're gonna take a quick break

884
00:38:22,000 --> 00:38:25,080
Speaker 2: and move into listen letters after we get into some ads,

885
00:38:25,120 --> 00:38:26,600
Speaker 2: So stick around, y'all.

886
00:38:35,360 --> 00:38:36,160
Speaker 4: All. Right, We're back.

887
00:38:36,280 --> 00:38:37,600
Speaker 3: We are back.

888
00:38:37,880 --> 00:38:38,560
Speaker 4: Let's take these.

889
00:38:41,880 --> 00:38:45,520
Speaker 3: Save those for Leida ya. Those are cute. Save tho.

890
00:38:45,560 --> 00:38:46,480
Speaker 3: Are your eyes adjusted?

891
00:38:46,560 --> 00:38:46,799
Speaker 4: All right?

892
00:38:46,840 --> 00:38:46,920
Speaker 2: Well?

893
00:38:46,920 --> 00:38:49,719
Speaker 3: Why your eyes adjusted? I'll read the first one? All right?

894
00:38:49,960 --> 00:38:51,759
Speaker 2: Hey, getting a naval Want to start off by saying

895
00:38:51,800 --> 00:38:54,319
Speaker 2: thanks for your transparency and sharing your family with the

896
00:38:54,320 --> 00:38:56,720
Speaker 2: world and being a great example of real life things.

897
00:38:56,960 --> 00:38:59,400
Speaker 2: You are very welcome. Thanks for following us. Thanks for

898
00:38:59,440 --> 00:39:01,760
Speaker 2: supporting us. I hate to say following thanks for supporting.

899
00:39:02,400 --> 00:39:05,759
Speaker 2: I am twenty nine years old from DMV and married. Sorry,

900
00:39:05,800 --> 00:39:08,680
Speaker 2: I'm pregnant with my first child. I'm currently five months

901
00:39:08,680 --> 00:39:11,760
Speaker 2: pregnant and starting to show more now. My boyfriend has

902
00:39:11,800 --> 00:39:15,840
Speaker 2: some years on me and has a nineteen year old daughter. Wow,

903
00:39:15,880 --> 00:39:18,880
Speaker 2: so they're only ten years apart. Okay. We've been together

904
00:39:18,880 --> 00:39:20,960
Speaker 2: for over a year and I love everything about our

905
00:39:21,000 --> 00:39:25,040
Speaker 2: relationship and him. Your podcast has taught me to not

906
00:39:25,160 --> 00:39:27,759
Speaker 2: only have some grace, but also give grace to my

907
00:39:27,760 --> 00:39:31,279
Speaker 2: boyfriend and pick my battles. We respect each other and

908
00:39:31,440 --> 00:39:34,400
Speaker 2: love each other, and he has been the most supportive

909
00:39:34,480 --> 00:39:37,160
Speaker 2: partner I've had in my twenty nine years of living.

910
00:39:37,800 --> 00:39:41,040
Speaker 2: My only problem now is sex while pregnant in the

911
00:39:41,040 --> 00:39:43,000
Speaker 2: first trimester. We were going at it all the time,

912
00:39:43,040 --> 00:39:45,319
Speaker 2: and it was great, very much, not like me first

913
00:39:45,320 --> 00:39:47,920
Speaker 2: trimester I was out. Now I feel like I'm not

914
00:39:47,960 --> 00:39:51,240
Speaker 2: attractive enough because he's avoiding me. I try to be sexy,

915
00:39:51,280 --> 00:39:53,360
Speaker 2: you rub on him the whole nine, but this negro

916
00:39:53,800 --> 00:39:54,600
Speaker 2: is denying me.

917
00:39:54,800 --> 00:39:58,600
Speaker 3: Gaths. I love when y'all be putting like little inserts

918
00:39:58,600 --> 00:39:59,120
Speaker 3: and stuff in.

919
00:39:59,080 --> 00:40:05,560
Speaker 2: There a whole me. I'm wondering if men. I'm wondering

920
00:40:05,640 --> 00:40:09,240
Speaker 2: if do men get this with their women when they're pregnant.

921
00:40:09,560 --> 00:40:12,000
Speaker 2: Is this normal to feel this way? What can I

922
00:40:12,040 --> 00:40:15,000
Speaker 2: do or say to change this? Because it's a little irritating,

923
00:40:15,040 --> 00:40:17,239
Speaker 2: and I'm trying to have a peaceful pregnancy as a

924
00:40:17,280 --> 00:40:19,680
Speaker 2: first mom. Pretty much, she's trying to be peace first

925
00:40:19,680 --> 00:40:23,319
Speaker 2: time mom. She's trying to get the d so she

926
00:40:23,400 --> 00:40:27,120
Speaker 2: could be a good mom, all right. I know after

927
00:40:27,200 --> 00:40:30,200
Speaker 2: birth I'll have to wait another few weeks or even

928
00:40:30,280 --> 00:40:33,480
Speaker 2: months before doing anything. I'm a very sexual person, and

929
00:40:33,680 --> 00:40:38,040
Speaker 2: I and I just miss us and that aspect of us.

930
00:40:38,520 --> 00:40:40,960
Speaker 2: What would love to hear what you both have to say?

931
00:40:41,000 --> 00:40:43,799
Speaker 2: Pretty much help a sister out. Well, girl, I don't

932
00:40:43,840 --> 00:40:46,799
Speaker 2: know what that's like is when I'm pregnant I'd be like,

933
00:40:46,880 --> 00:40:47,600
Speaker 2: don't touch me.

934
00:40:48,440 --> 00:40:49,120
Speaker 3: Don't touch me.

935
00:40:49,239 --> 00:40:51,359
Speaker 2: Why would I want something else in my body while

936
00:40:51,400 --> 00:40:54,600
Speaker 2: I'm growing a human? Well, personally, my first trimester, I'm

937
00:40:54,640 --> 00:40:57,080
Speaker 2: always out for the county, like, don't look at me,

938
00:40:57,239 --> 00:41:01,239
Speaker 2: I'm puking, imnauseous. Second trymester, I get my mojo back.

939
00:41:01,280 --> 00:41:04,800
Speaker 2: So second trimester is always good for us. It's almost

940
00:41:04,800 --> 00:41:06,640
Speaker 2: like I'm not pregnant, yeah, because it's at that point

941
00:41:06,680 --> 00:41:08,279
Speaker 2: now five months, it's like you kind of show, but

942
00:41:08,320 --> 00:41:11,000
Speaker 2: you're not really showing. And then once you know the

943
00:41:11,080 --> 00:41:14,040
Speaker 2: third hits, it's just like, get this baby out of me,

944
00:41:14,080 --> 00:41:14,680
Speaker 2: don't touch me.

945
00:41:15,040 --> 00:41:17,920
Speaker 3: You know I will say though.

946
00:41:17,760 --> 00:41:21,319
Speaker 2: For you or in my experience with you, each time

947
00:41:21,360 --> 00:41:24,240
Speaker 2: I was pregnant, you've never made me feel as if

948
00:41:24,760 --> 00:41:26,520
Speaker 2: you weren't attracted to me or did not want to

949
00:41:26,600 --> 00:41:26,919
Speaker 2: have sex.

950
00:41:27,120 --> 00:41:29,759
Speaker 3: I don't care what it is, what trimester it is.

951
00:41:30,640 --> 00:41:32,359
Speaker 3: We could be about to have the baby, and Deva

952
00:41:32,640 --> 00:41:33,520
Speaker 3: just like, well I.

953
00:41:33,440 --> 00:41:37,320
Speaker 2: Heard that, if I heard that, if we did it,

954
00:41:37,360 --> 00:41:39,399
Speaker 2: and you know, I knowed it in there, and that's

955
00:41:39,440 --> 00:41:41,040
Speaker 2: going to break down the lining of the service.

956
00:41:43,560 --> 00:41:44,960
Speaker 3: I did hear it, and.

957
00:41:46,560 --> 00:41:49,160
Speaker 1: The fact a scientific thank you. I'll be here with

958
00:41:49,239 --> 00:41:51,240
Speaker 1: the science, the science.

959
00:41:51,600 --> 00:41:54,160
Speaker 2: But I say that to say, who would think in

960
00:41:54,239 --> 00:41:57,120
Speaker 2: that moment that you would still find me attractive enough

961
00:41:57,120 --> 00:41:59,600
Speaker 2: to want to do anything? So speak from the male perspective,

962
00:41:59,600 --> 00:42:00,920
Speaker 2: because she's trying to get that insight.

963
00:42:01,080 --> 00:42:03,640
Speaker 1: I can't speak from the male perspective. I can speak

964
00:42:03,680 --> 00:42:07,280
Speaker 1: from the devour perspective. It was nothing about you, ever

965
00:42:08,040 --> 00:42:11,920
Speaker 1: that was not attractive to me. But I do have

966
00:42:12,040 --> 00:42:16,000
Speaker 1: friends and people that I know who when their wife

967
00:42:16,120 --> 00:42:19,960
Speaker 1: is pregnant, they're just not into that. And sometimes it's

968
00:42:20,000 --> 00:42:20,799
Speaker 1: for fear.

969
00:42:20,640 --> 00:42:23,319
Speaker 3: Of not into sex or not into their women.

970
00:42:23,560 --> 00:42:24,960
Speaker 4: No, not into having sex.

971
00:42:25,080 --> 00:42:28,000
Speaker 1: It's like my wife is carrying my baby, and I

972
00:42:28,000 --> 00:42:29,960
Speaker 1: don't want to mess nothing up, so.

973
00:42:30,600 --> 00:42:32,799
Speaker 3: Feeling like they may hurt the baby or that kind

974
00:42:32,800 --> 00:42:33,080
Speaker 3: of thing.

975
00:42:33,160 --> 00:42:35,560
Speaker 4: Okay, Like some men just just not into that.

976
00:42:35,600 --> 00:42:37,759
Speaker 1: They're just like baby you all right, like children had

977
00:42:37,760 --> 00:42:39,120
Speaker 1: a baby, and then we can get back to our

978
00:42:39,120 --> 00:42:42,960
Speaker 1: regular schedule program. Then I can't speak for like the

979
00:42:43,360 --> 00:42:46,400
Speaker 1: male species because you know what I'm saying, and some

980
00:42:46,480 --> 00:42:49,680
Speaker 1: of these things it's hard to generalize because every case

981
00:42:49,760 --> 00:42:53,160
Speaker 1: is so different. You know, we don't know what she

982
00:42:53,239 --> 00:42:55,160
Speaker 1: looks like when she's pregnant, what she doesn't look like

983
00:42:55,160 --> 00:42:58,080
Speaker 1: when she's pregnant, so or what she looks like when

984
00:42:58,080 --> 00:43:00,080
Speaker 1: she's not pregnant. I say that to say is that

985
00:43:00,120 --> 00:43:02,040
Speaker 1: she might not have changed at all, but she may

986
00:43:02,040 --> 00:43:04,000
Speaker 1: be taking it as because now that she's pregnant, she

987
00:43:04,000 --> 00:43:06,680
Speaker 1: looks different and we don't know. Yeah, we don't know

988
00:43:06,719 --> 00:43:09,400
Speaker 1: if she looks any different. He may just be turned

989
00:43:09,400 --> 00:43:11,719
Speaker 1: off by the thought that his child is in there,

990
00:43:12,400 --> 00:43:14,640
Speaker 1: or he may not be interested because she might have

991
00:43:14,680 --> 00:43:15,160
Speaker 1: gained weight.

992
00:43:15,200 --> 00:43:15,839
Speaker 4: Like, we don't know.

993
00:43:16,360 --> 00:43:17,719
Speaker 1: So my thing is it's hard for me to give

994
00:43:17,760 --> 00:43:22,680
Speaker 1: her advice based on, you know, a paragraph. But what

995
00:43:22,760 --> 00:43:25,560
Speaker 1: I will say is, like I tell everyone else, do

996
00:43:25,719 --> 00:43:27,200
Speaker 1: not listen to anybody else.

997
00:43:27,800 --> 00:43:29,120
Speaker 4: Our advice doesn't matter.

998
00:43:29,560 --> 00:43:32,239
Speaker 1: Speak to your partner, have conversations and find out what's

999
00:43:32,280 --> 00:43:35,040
Speaker 1: going on. And if he or she tells you how

1000
00:43:35,080 --> 00:43:37,200
Speaker 1: they feel, don't judge them for how they feel or

1001
00:43:37,200 --> 00:43:37,920
Speaker 1: what they're saying.

1002
00:43:38,520 --> 00:43:40,560
Speaker 4: Try to listen and understand where they're coming from.

1003
00:43:40,880 --> 00:43:45,080
Speaker 1: For example, if he says, bebe, I'm not comfortable having

1004
00:43:45,080 --> 00:43:47,799
Speaker 1: sex with you while you're pregnant because I don't want

1005
00:43:47,840 --> 00:43:51,400
Speaker 1: to bother anything. No no, no, no respect his decision, But

1006
00:43:51,480 --> 00:43:55,480
Speaker 1: tell him, yo, I need some because this is what

1007
00:43:55,520 --> 00:43:58,160
Speaker 1: I require in this moment, can we find a way

1008
00:43:58,200 --> 00:44:01,560
Speaker 1: to compromise, you know, because that's what we did. You

1009
00:44:01,640 --> 00:44:04,640
Speaker 1: weren't always into having sex in on every moment, but

1010
00:44:04,680 --> 00:44:06,480
Speaker 1: she was like, I know Devo needs something, so let

1011
00:44:06,560 --> 00:44:07,880
Speaker 1: me take care of him this way.

1012
00:44:08,200 --> 00:44:09,840
Speaker 4: That's how the compromises happened.

1013
00:44:09,880 --> 00:44:14,719
Speaker 2: The compromise was lockjaw. That was pretty much the lock

1014
00:44:14,920 --> 00:44:19,080
Speaker 2: jaw compromise. Yeah, put the shades back on m hm,

1015
00:44:19,880 --> 00:44:22,640
Speaker 2: because that was the only option. I did not want

1016
00:44:22,680 --> 00:44:25,160
Speaker 2: anything in or around me. But I know he required

1017
00:44:25,200 --> 00:44:29,680
Speaker 2: a certain kind of experience. And I will say by Dakota,

1018
00:44:29,760 --> 00:44:31,000
Speaker 2: I was I'm mastered.

1019
00:44:31,160 --> 00:44:33,160
Speaker 4: Oh yeah, you were. You were a master. It was

1020
00:44:33,200 --> 00:44:34,480
Speaker 4: like you got so good at you was like, I

1021
00:44:34,480 --> 00:44:35,200
Speaker 4: ain't gonna be here.

1022
00:44:35,280 --> 00:44:36,160
Speaker 3: Let me tell you.

1023
00:44:35,760 --> 00:44:37,560
Speaker 4: You will put that baby.

1024
00:44:38,400 --> 00:44:40,480
Speaker 3: It was literally like a like a thing like it just.

1025
00:44:40,480 --> 00:44:44,319
Speaker 1: You will put the belly. You just dropped the belly

1026
00:44:44,400 --> 00:44:45,879
Speaker 1: right here, and you'd be like just standing right.

1027
00:44:45,760 --> 00:44:48,680
Speaker 3: Here, just pretend like you don't see this belly drop down.

1028
00:44:49,120 --> 00:44:50,719
Speaker 3: I don't know. At that point, it was just like

1029
00:44:50,760 --> 00:44:51,480
Speaker 3: fac and titties.

1030
00:44:51,760 --> 00:44:52,200
Speaker 4: That's it.

1031
00:44:52,360 --> 00:44:55,239
Speaker 1: But no, but but seriously, it's like pregnancy is a

1032
00:44:55,280 --> 00:44:57,960
Speaker 1: difficult time for people when it comes to sexual like

1033
00:44:58,040 --> 00:45:01,360
Speaker 1: being sexual. Some people are not into pregnancy. Some people

1034
00:45:01,360 --> 00:45:04,680
Speaker 1: are into pregnancy. Some women's sex drive increased during pregnancy.

1035
00:45:05,040 --> 00:45:06,640
Speaker 4: One of my homework, I'm like, yo.

1036
00:45:07,000 --> 00:45:09,600
Speaker 1: My wife be on me all day and I'll be

1037
00:45:09,640 --> 00:45:13,080
Speaker 1: like yo, like you pregnant, like chill. You know what

1038
00:45:13,120 --> 00:45:16,640
Speaker 1: I'm saying him, And well, he wasn't really loving it

1039
00:45:16,680 --> 00:45:18,680
Speaker 1: because his biggest fear was like I don't want to.

1040
00:45:19,200 --> 00:45:21,359
Speaker 4: Like this is too much.

1041
00:45:21,680 --> 00:45:23,640
Speaker 1: I just don't want to do anything, like I just don't.

1042
00:45:23,680 --> 00:45:25,799
Speaker 1: And I'm like, bro, that's what I told him. I said, Bro,

1043
00:45:25,920 --> 00:45:30,400
Speaker 1: your wife requires certain things. You guys agreed to be

1044
00:45:30,480 --> 00:45:33,480
Speaker 1: in this marriage together. You can't just tell her no

1045
00:45:33,760 --> 00:45:35,959
Speaker 1: because you don't want to. What if at some point

1046
00:45:36,000 --> 00:45:38,040
Speaker 1: she just decides she's going to tell you no because

1047
00:45:38,080 --> 00:45:40,719
Speaker 1: she don't want to. And he was like, I never

1048
00:45:40,760 --> 00:45:42,680
Speaker 1: thought about it like that. I said, we don't. We

1049
00:45:42,719 --> 00:45:45,840
Speaker 1: don't ever think about a woman's needs sexually. It's always

1050
00:45:45,840 --> 00:45:47,840
Speaker 1: you have to provide for what a man needs sexually.

1051
00:45:47,840 --> 00:45:49,920
Speaker 1: But when a woman need something sexually, it's almost like

1052
00:45:50,000 --> 00:45:50,879
Speaker 1: she'll figure it out.

1053
00:45:51,120 --> 00:45:52,959
Speaker 4: That's not fair. It's not fair.

1054
00:45:53,000 --> 00:45:54,719
Speaker 1: We don't think it's fair when they do it to

1055
00:45:54,800 --> 00:45:56,680
Speaker 1: us because she's pregnant.

1056
00:45:56,719 --> 00:46:00,160
Speaker 4: If she requires that, yo, and do that right, I

1057
00:46:00,200 --> 00:46:02,160
Speaker 4: can do that. Yeah, you know what I'm saying.

1058
00:46:02,200 --> 00:46:04,359
Speaker 1: Like, and maybe he doesn't want to do intercourse, Hey,

1059
00:46:04,360 --> 00:46:07,000
Speaker 1: you're gonna have to go down there and handle your business.

1060
00:46:07,719 --> 00:46:09,279
Speaker 4: You know what I'm saying, Ain't nothing wrong with that.

1061
00:46:09,440 --> 00:46:11,080
Speaker 3: Get creative, you know what I'm saying.

1062
00:46:11,320 --> 00:46:13,520
Speaker 1: You created to find some ways. But talk to each other,

1063
00:46:13,880 --> 00:46:15,680
Speaker 1: you know what I'm saying. Continuously let each other know

1064
00:46:15,719 --> 00:46:18,439
Speaker 1: how you feel, what you need and make it work.

1065
00:46:18,520 --> 00:46:21,440
Speaker 2: And pregnancy is a particularly vulnerable moment for women, so

1066
00:46:21,440 --> 00:46:23,399
Speaker 2: we just be in our feelings all the time because

1067
00:46:23,400 --> 00:46:25,600
Speaker 2: the hormones are like all over the place, so it

1068
00:46:25,640 --> 00:46:27,960
Speaker 2: could also be a little bit of useis just kind

1069
00:46:27,960 --> 00:46:31,040
Speaker 2: of being you know, self conscious about your body and

1070
00:46:31,080 --> 00:46:33,440
Speaker 2: the changes taking place. So we would say that all

1071
00:46:33,560 --> 00:46:36,600
Speaker 2: to say, have the conversation with him, take the guesting

1072
00:46:36,640 --> 00:46:40,080
Speaker 2: out of it, and just ask him directly, like you

1073
00:46:40,080 --> 00:46:41,520
Speaker 2: know what's going on, you.

1074
00:46:41,480 --> 00:46:42,440
Speaker 3: Know, good luck to you.

1075
00:46:42,520 --> 00:46:46,360
Speaker 1: Hopefully he'll be honest about it, because everyone's going to

1076
00:46:46,400 --> 00:46:47,080
Speaker 1: be honest about it.

1077
00:46:47,080 --> 00:46:48,640
Speaker 4: He may have to learn how to open up. They've

1078
00:46:48,640 --> 00:46:49,799
Speaker 4: only been together for a year.

1079
00:46:50,320 --> 00:46:52,719
Speaker 3: They have been together for a year, but just don't

1080
00:46:52,760 --> 00:46:56,359
Speaker 3: judge him for what he says in his response. Receive it,

1081
00:46:56,560 --> 00:46:57,480
Speaker 3: you know, for what it is.

1082
00:46:57,760 --> 00:47:02,360
Speaker 2: And I think that ultimately what you want is to

1083
00:47:02,360 --> 00:47:05,480
Speaker 2: try to have that open line of communication. So make

1084
00:47:05,520 --> 00:47:08,040
Speaker 2: it an atmosphere where he feels comfortable opening up and

1085
00:47:08,080 --> 00:47:09,040
Speaker 2: don't take it personally.

1086
00:47:09,480 --> 00:47:12,279
Speaker 1: And shout out to you man for still trying to

1087
00:47:12,280 --> 00:47:14,240
Speaker 1: take care of your man and take care of yourself

1088
00:47:14,239 --> 00:47:16,000
Speaker 1: while pregnant and not saying I'm going to.

1089
00:47:16,239 --> 00:47:20,560
Speaker 2: All the best with baby. Yeah, congrats Hakadeen and Duval.

1090
00:47:20,680 --> 00:47:23,000
Speaker 1: I'm a huge fan of you both and your willingness

1091
00:47:23,040 --> 00:47:24,799
Speaker 1: to be open about your journey. And thank you for

1092
00:47:24,840 --> 00:47:27,799
Speaker 1: giving us all hope. I we appreciate you. Thank you

1093
00:47:28,040 --> 00:47:30,640
Speaker 1: just giving y'all love. I've been in a relationship for

1094
00:47:30,640 --> 00:47:33,080
Speaker 1: about a year, and we've dated for about five months

1095
00:47:33,120 --> 00:47:37,320
Speaker 1: before making it official. We're extremely familiar with each other's families,

1096
00:47:37,640 --> 00:47:41,160
Speaker 1: taking international trips together, lots of date nights, linking with friends,

1097
00:47:41,200 --> 00:47:44,120
Speaker 1: planning our futures, and just really taking care of each other.

1098
00:47:44,400 --> 00:47:46,480
Speaker 1: I just want an outside perspective to make sure I'm

1099
00:47:46,480 --> 00:47:50,040
Speaker 1: not blindsided, blinded by love. His birthday recently passed and

1100
00:47:50,040 --> 00:47:52,239
Speaker 1: I got him Usher tickets in Vegas. Yeah, he's a

1101
00:47:52,239 --> 00:47:55,239
Speaker 1: big fan of written love letters. So I searched his

1102
00:47:55,360 --> 00:47:57,800
Speaker 1: phone because I got a new one for the keyword

1103
00:47:57,840 --> 00:48:01,640
Speaker 1: day to make a oh boy, to make a collage

1104
00:48:01,760 --> 00:48:05,280
Speaker 1: of our acute love message. However, I found messages in

1105
00:48:05,360 --> 00:48:08,879
Speaker 1: his fraternities group chat about him saying he ran into

1106
00:48:08,960 --> 00:48:12,680
Speaker 1: Bay because he didn't know they worked closely, and how

1107
00:48:12,719 --> 00:48:15,920
Speaker 1: he's got to be low out here, but she yelled

1108
00:48:15,960 --> 00:48:18,239
Speaker 1: his name and it threw them off. I don't want

1109
00:48:18,239 --> 00:48:20,440
Speaker 1: to waste my time, but I don't want to navigate.

1110
00:48:20,480 --> 00:48:22,200
Speaker 1: I don't want to negate my feelings. But I also

1111
00:48:22,239 --> 00:48:24,880
Speaker 1: don't want to be lied to by someone who says

1112
00:48:24,920 --> 00:48:27,880
Speaker 1: confidently how good of a liar he is? Oh wow,

1113
00:48:28,560 --> 00:48:31,799
Speaker 1: is this something you both think is worth addressing?

1114
00:48:33,440 --> 00:48:39,280
Speaker 3: Worth addressing? What addressing? And then let us know what happened.

1115
00:48:39,760 --> 00:48:42,839
Speaker 4: Only thing I will say is this right? He gave

1116
00:48:42,920 --> 00:48:46,080
Speaker 4: you his phone and access to it.

1117
00:48:46,680 --> 00:48:49,279
Speaker 3: Well, she said I searched his phone. He didn't say

1118
00:48:49,320 --> 00:48:51,680
Speaker 3: that he gave access, so that could have happened in

1119
00:48:51,719 --> 00:48:52,200
Speaker 3: this way.

1120
00:48:52,280 --> 00:48:55,400
Speaker 1: If this dude is moving wild crazy like that, she

1121
00:48:55,600 --> 00:48:57,640
Speaker 1: not gonna have easy access to his phone like that.

1122
00:48:58,680 --> 00:48:59,640
Speaker 4: That's That's what I'm saying.

1123
00:48:59,640 --> 00:49:02,600
Speaker 3: It could be, as she put it on him, he's

1124
00:49:02,680 --> 00:49:04,200
Speaker 3: sleep he knocked out.

1125
00:49:04,680 --> 00:49:06,600
Speaker 1: Let me let me tell you something and she went

1126
00:49:06,640 --> 00:49:09,839
Speaker 1: to town. Let me tell you something about there's a way.

1127
00:49:09,960 --> 00:49:12,200
Speaker 1: But let me tell you something about dudes who proclaimed

1128
00:49:12,239 --> 00:49:14,360
Speaker 1: to be good liars. They be on top of their games.

1129
00:49:15,160 --> 00:49:17,120
Speaker 1: They be on top of the game, all right. And

1130
00:49:17,719 --> 00:49:20,360
Speaker 1: I'm saying this to say this, I'm not saying that

1131
00:49:20,440 --> 00:49:23,000
Speaker 1: he's not lying. I'm saying it definitely needs to be addressed.

1132
00:49:23,600 --> 00:49:28,120
Speaker 1: But don't be surprised if it's nothing when it's addressed.

1133
00:49:27,680 --> 00:49:30,640
Speaker 2: And he's just like, right, yeah, Or it could just

1134
00:49:30,680 --> 00:49:32,600
Speaker 2: be his friends, like if it's the fraternity group chat,

1135
00:49:32,680 --> 00:49:34,800
Speaker 2: y'all be ragging on each other all the time about

1136
00:49:34,880 --> 00:49:35,479
Speaker 2: random things.

1137
00:49:36,480 --> 00:49:38,160
Speaker 1: But and I'm not making excuses. I do think it

1138
00:49:38,239 --> 00:49:40,280
Speaker 1: needs to be address because the ship does sound crazy.

1139
00:49:40,680 --> 00:49:41,520
Speaker 4: But don't be.

1140
00:49:43,000 --> 00:49:46,480
Speaker 1: Surprised if he looks at you stupid, if you like, yeah,

1141
00:49:46,560 --> 00:49:48,160
Speaker 1: this is baby, because this is the girl that I

1142
00:49:48,239 --> 00:49:50,480
Speaker 1: had a crush on or something something something, and yeah,

1143
00:49:50,520 --> 00:49:52,760
Speaker 1: we're not fucking but I saw.

1144
00:49:52,640 --> 00:49:54,279
Speaker 4: Her, and you know what I'm saying, like that was

1145
00:49:54,440 --> 00:49:57,040
Speaker 4: my name for her at the time, that her in

1146
00:49:57,160 --> 00:49:58,719
Speaker 4: our group chats when we got to move.

1147
00:49:58,800 --> 00:50:01,080
Speaker 1: People who move funny, the first thing they're gonna say

1148
00:50:01,920 --> 00:50:03,799
Speaker 1: when they post something in the group chat is yo,

1149
00:50:03,920 --> 00:50:04,759
Speaker 1: y'all better delete that.

1150
00:50:06,840 --> 00:50:07,680
Speaker 4: I'm being honest.

1151
00:50:07,840 --> 00:50:10,560
Speaker 1: Like, if a dude is moving foul, right and he

1152
00:50:10,719 --> 00:50:12,560
Speaker 1: goes in the group chat, and he'd be like, Yo,

1153
00:50:13,560 --> 00:50:17,080
Speaker 1: da da da, y delete these messages asap. Somebody who

1154
00:50:17,200 --> 00:50:18,960
Speaker 1: moving foul like that is not going to have a

1155
00:50:19,040 --> 00:50:22,160
Speaker 1: group chat with all their friends putting all their information

1156
00:50:22,440 --> 00:50:24,319
Speaker 1: and letting the girl have access.

1157
00:50:23,960 --> 00:50:24,479
Speaker 4: To their phone.

1158
00:50:24,600 --> 00:50:26,480
Speaker 3: I'm you know better than I do, because I don't be.

1159
00:50:28,200 --> 00:50:31,040
Speaker 4: Women women are the best liars. Women women be trying

1160
00:50:31,040 --> 00:50:32,359
Speaker 4: to I don't know what you're talking about.

1161
00:50:32,600 --> 00:50:35,200
Speaker 2: I'm thinking in their case in her group chat, dev

1162
00:50:35,360 --> 00:50:36,879
Speaker 2: I'm not talking about a generalization.

1163
00:50:37,200 --> 00:50:39,320
Speaker 1: No, what I'm saying is is she said that this

1164
00:50:39,520 --> 00:50:41,759
Speaker 1: man proclaims to be the best liar in the world.

1165
00:50:42,360 --> 00:50:45,800
Speaker 1: That seems extremely frivolous from a god who claims to

1166
00:50:45,840 --> 00:50:46,680
Speaker 1: be the best lie.

1167
00:50:46,640 --> 00:50:48,080
Speaker 3: Let me tell my girl that I'm a great liar.

1168
00:50:48,960 --> 00:50:52,880
Speaker 1: That yes, but I also do think that the stories

1169
00:50:52,920 --> 00:50:56,040
Speaker 1: sound crazy and she needs to be like, yo, what

1170
00:50:56,239 --> 00:50:57,120
Speaker 1: is this? Like?

1171
00:50:57,480 --> 00:50:59,000
Speaker 3: What is this that we can agree on?

1172
00:51:00,000 --> 00:51:03,359
Speaker 1: What is this? And he may lie about it right.

1173
00:51:03,480 --> 00:51:04,920
Speaker 1: But what I'm saying is if he tells you the

1174
00:51:04,960 --> 00:51:10,960
Speaker 1: truth and be like, yeah, this is right, he's being honest.

1175
00:51:10,680 --> 00:51:13,560
Speaker 2: About it because the brother could be homegirl from college

1176
00:51:13,680 --> 00:51:16,000
Speaker 2: days or whoever, Like you know what I'm saying, anybody

1177
00:51:16,120 --> 00:51:17,920
Speaker 2: like it could be anybody, So we won't always assume

1178
00:51:17,920 --> 00:51:18,239
Speaker 2: the worst.

1179
00:51:18,320 --> 00:51:20,840
Speaker 4: Don't assume the worst, but it does need to be addressed.

1180
00:51:20,840 --> 00:51:20,880
Speaker 1: It.

1181
00:51:21,200 --> 00:51:25,600
Speaker 3: It does definitely address that joints and then right back to.

1182
00:51:25,719 --> 00:51:29,080
Speaker 1: Us to let us know what you know that right

1183
00:51:29,160 --> 00:51:31,120
Speaker 1: back to us and let us know. But let's let's think.

1184
00:51:31,160 --> 00:51:32,680
Speaker 1: Let's think they've been together for how long.

1185
00:51:33,680 --> 00:51:34,200
Speaker 4: Did you say?

1186
00:51:34,600 --> 00:51:37,160
Speaker 3: Let me see what is my thing that's scrolling? What

1187
00:51:37,239 --> 00:51:42,120
Speaker 3: the hell? Ye oh, yes, about a year? She said.

1188
00:51:42,160 --> 00:51:43,560
Speaker 4: It says they've been against for about a year.

1189
00:51:43,880 --> 00:51:47,239
Speaker 2: Uh huh m hmm, Well a relationship for about a year.

1190
00:51:47,360 --> 00:51:49,920
Speaker 2: We've dated for about five months before making it official.

1191
00:51:50,040 --> 00:51:52,600
Speaker 4: Okay, Okay, so let's see exactly what he says. Let's

1192
00:51:52,640 --> 00:51:53,279
Speaker 4: break this down.

1193
00:51:54,280 --> 00:51:56,120
Speaker 1: I just want an outside of perspective to make sure

1194
00:51:56,120 --> 00:52:01,040
Speaker 1: I'm not blinded by love. His birthday recently passed Musha tickets. Okay,

1195
00:52:01,520 --> 00:52:03,520
Speaker 1: So she put in the word bay to make a

1196
00:52:03,600 --> 00:52:07,440
Speaker 1: collage I don't know. I found messages in his fraternities

1197
00:52:07,480 --> 00:52:11,760
Speaker 1: group chat about him saying he ran into Bay because

1198
00:52:11,800 --> 00:52:14,560
Speaker 1: he didn't know they were closely and how he's got.

1199
00:52:14,560 --> 00:52:16,840
Speaker 4: To be low out here. That sound like.

1200
00:52:18,680 --> 00:52:20,360
Speaker 3: What I don't know?

1201
00:52:20,440 --> 00:52:21,920
Speaker 4: You tell me, I'm asking you.

1202
00:52:22,719 --> 00:52:27,960
Speaker 1: That sounds like an admission of cheating. You gotta bewdy.

1203
00:52:28,800 --> 00:52:31,640
Speaker 1: But she yelled his name out and it threw him off.

1204
00:52:32,000 --> 00:52:35,520
Speaker 1: I don't want to waste my time. Got to be

1205
00:52:35,600 --> 00:52:37,640
Speaker 1: low out here. Let me ask you what you think.

1206
00:52:39,480 --> 00:52:41,640
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's given that you need to have a conversation.

1207
00:52:41,800 --> 00:52:44,520
Speaker 2: Sis right, because what he got to be low for

1208
00:52:44,680 --> 00:52:46,560
Speaker 2: is he being low to Bay and you're like the

1209
00:52:46,640 --> 00:52:48,920
Speaker 2: side piece or vice versa.

1210
00:52:49,440 --> 00:52:51,839
Speaker 1: No, I don't think that because he said he said,

1211
00:52:52,239 --> 00:52:53,760
Speaker 1: I didn't know that they were closely?

1212
00:52:54,360 --> 00:52:56,680
Speaker 4: Oh where he ran into Bay because he didn't know

1213
00:52:57,160 --> 00:52:59,120
Speaker 4: they were So it's not his Bay. How does he

1214
00:52:59,239 --> 00:53:01,800
Speaker 4: not know that his babe closely to him? True? You

1215
00:53:01,800 --> 00:53:03,839
Speaker 4: see what I'm saying. That's why it doesn't make that much.

1216
00:53:04,120 --> 00:53:08,319
Speaker 2: It is Bee just like a person. For example, there's

1217
00:53:08,360 --> 00:53:10,719
Speaker 2: people that you have in your group chats with guys

1218
00:53:10,800 --> 00:53:12,720
Speaker 2: or whatever. It may be a photo of a woman

1219
00:53:12,920 --> 00:53:15,160
Speaker 2: and we're like oh we call her Bay. Oh shoot,

1220
00:53:15,160 --> 00:53:15,880
Speaker 2: I ran in today.

1221
00:53:16,000 --> 00:53:18,120
Speaker 1: That's what I'm trying to realize is that don't be

1222
00:53:18,320 --> 00:53:21,640
Speaker 1: surprised if what you think is something is actually nothing.

1223
00:53:22,280 --> 00:53:23,960
Speaker 1: But then he's gonna be asking you why you're going

1224
00:53:24,000 --> 00:53:26,600
Speaker 1: through my phone because because and the reason why I

1225
00:53:26,680 --> 00:53:29,520
Speaker 1: say that is because no man and I know that

1226
00:53:29,640 --> 00:53:32,000
Speaker 1: it's going to be an admission of cheating in a

1227
00:53:32,040 --> 00:53:33,919
Speaker 1: group chat, is going to leave it in the group

1228
00:53:34,040 --> 00:53:38,000
Speaker 1: chat and then have is this girl potentially to his phone?

1229
00:53:38,080 --> 00:53:41,200
Speaker 4: Like potent? Like we have to start thinking logically.

1230
00:53:41,360 --> 00:53:44,279
Speaker 3: All right, it could be logical until she asked him.

1231
00:53:44,440 --> 00:53:47,400
Speaker 1: And right, and could it could be a funny thing.

1232
00:53:47,560 --> 00:53:53,040
Speaker 1: For example, how many uh I G. Chicks do we follow?

1233
00:53:53,120 --> 00:53:54,120
Speaker 1: And you'd be like, that's Bee.

1234
00:53:54,760 --> 00:53:56,520
Speaker 4: Yeah, you know what I'm saying. You'd be like, that's babe.

1235
00:53:58,120 --> 00:53:59,719
Speaker 1: One thing I'm gonna tell you most men don't say

1236
00:53:59,800 --> 00:54:02,600
Speaker 1: a woman that they would is if that's Bee unless

1237
00:54:02,640 --> 00:54:03,080
Speaker 1: it's a joke.

1238
00:54:03,120 --> 00:54:05,480
Speaker 4: I'm just being honest. No man says to another man, yo,

1239
00:54:05,600 --> 00:54:07,480
Speaker 4: that's Bee. Nobody really does that.

1240
00:54:07,880 --> 00:54:08,600
Speaker 3: But we'll see.

1241
00:54:08,680 --> 00:54:10,120
Speaker 1: I think it needs to be addressed. And you do

1242
00:54:10,280 --> 00:54:11,719
Speaker 1: have to write back to us now that you heard

1243
00:54:11,760 --> 00:54:13,840
Speaker 1: this listening letter played on the show. You got to

1244
00:54:13,840 --> 00:54:15,080
Speaker 1: write back to us and tell us what you.

1245
00:54:15,160 --> 00:54:17,080
Speaker 3: Found out the outcome of the conversation.

1246
00:54:17,719 --> 00:54:20,719
Speaker 4: Yeah, but I'm just I'm just saying based on context clues. Okay,

1247
00:54:21,200 --> 00:54:23,279
Speaker 4: got you. If he is cheating, he's not.

1248
00:54:23,320 --> 00:54:26,840
Speaker 3: A good cheating and he's not a good liar, so

1249
00:54:26,960 --> 00:54:30,120
Speaker 3: we can take that cap away from him. All right, Guys,

1250
00:54:30,160 --> 00:54:31,799
Speaker 3: if you want to be featured as a listener letter,

1251
00:54:32,200 --> 00:54:34,960
Speaker 3: email us at dead Ass Advice at gmail dot com.

1252
00:54:36,440 --> 00:54:38,600
Speaker 4: That's D E A D A S S A d

1253
00:54:38,760 --> 00:54:41,600
Speaker 4: V I C E at gmail dot com.

1254
00:54:42,160 --> 00:54:45,040
Speaker 3: My moment of truth is very simple when it comes

1255
00:54:45,080 --> 00:54:49,040
Speaker 3: to vacations. Book it. Book it.

1256
00:54:49,160 --> 00:54:49,440
Speaker 4: That's it.

1257
00:54:49,880 --> 00:54:51,279
Speaker 3: Book it, do it.

1258
00:54:52,160 --> 00:54:54,520
Speaker 2: It's it's let me tell you if you haven't been

1259
00:54:54,560 --> 00:54:57,160
Speaker 2: on one, if you're in need of one, if your

1260
00:54:57,239 --> 00:55:01,240
Speaker 2: partner is in need of one, or see that plan ahead.

1261
00:55:01,920 --> 00:55:04,120
Speaker 2: There's so many ways to enjoy each other's company, and

1262
00:55:04,160 --> 00:55:07,080
Speaker 2: it doesn't have to be super elaborate and expensive. Sometimes

1263
00:55:07,120 --> 00:55:09,560
Speaker 2: it's just a change of scenery. That can be something local,

1264
00:55:09,640 --> 00:55:13,600
Speaker 2: it could be a road trip. Just that disconnecting to

1265
00:55:13,680 --> 00:55:15,960
Speaker 2: reconnect is so important, So book it.

1266
00:55:17,280 --> 00:55:17,600
Speaker 4: Copy.

1267
00:55:17,920 --> 00:55:22,040
Speaker 1: I will say this when you book vacations matter more

1268
00:55:22,120 --> 00:55:24,960
Speaker 1: than just booking a vacation. If you book a vacation

1269
00:55:25,200 --> 00:55:27,600
Speaker 1: right before a family vacation, everything you did on that

1270
00:55:27,719 --> 00:55:30,600
Speaker 1: vacation is just gone swept under the rug. And because

1271
00:55:30,719 --> 00:55:34,160
Speaker 1: Kadeen was exhausted recovery after the first vacation, then we

1272
00:55:34,200 --> 00:55:36,440
Speaker 1: went on the extended family vacation and she don't even

1273
00:55:36,480 --> 00:55:39,160
Speaker 1: remember anything we did on the vacation. So I would say,

1274
00:55:39,200 --> 00:55:42,480
Speaker 1: either bookend vacations, one of the beginning and one on

1275
00:55:42,560 --> 00:55:44,840
Speaker 1: the end, and that you can only afford one at

1276
00:55:44,880 --> 00:55:47,880
Speaker 1: the end. Make your vacation be the last thing you

1277
00:55:48,000 --> 00:55:50,160
Speaker 1: do before you send them kids back to school.

1278
00:55:51,160 --> 00:55:53,920
Speaker 3: That'schol oh Man, all right, y'all.

1279
00:55:54,000 --> 00:55:56,680
Speaker 2: Be sure to find us on Patreon to see exclusive

1280
00:55:56,719 --> 00:56:00,279
Speaker 2: dead Ass podcasts, video content, and so much more of

1281
00:56:00,360 --> 00:56:03,840
Speaker 2: the Ellis family, all deca devous truth, all that good stuff,

1282
00:56:04,239 --> 00:56:06,560
Speaker 2: and you can find us on social media at dead

1283
00:56:06,600 --> 00:56:09,160
Speaker 2: Ass the podcast on Instagram, you can find me Kadeen

1284
00:56:09,239 --> 00:56:11,200
Speaker 2: I am on Instagram and TikTok.

1285
00:56:11,040 --> 00:56:11,719
Speaker 4: And I am Devo.

1286
00:56:11,880 --> 00:56:14,920
Speaker 1: And if you're listening on Apple Podcasts, be sure to rate, review,

1287
00:56:15,120 --> 00:56:20,320
Speaker 1: and subscribe dead Ass. Dead Ass is a production of

1288
00:56:20,440 --> 00:56:24,680
Speaker 1: iHeartMedia podcast Network and It's produced by Donor Pinya and Trible.

1289
00:56:24,960 --> 00:56:27,440
Speaker 1: Follow the podcast on social media at dead ass the

1290
00:56:27,560 --> 00:56:29,040
Speaker 1: Podcast and never miss a Thing